#the context doesnt make it less weird btw

[cometcomett]

Here is some out of context WTC screenshots for you all

[the-s1lly-corner]

Various crps x streamer reader

Except the admin doesnt watch streamers often so his knowledge is limited

Characters: ben Drowned, ticci toby, laughing jack

Notes: reader is GN, Ben's part is platonic

Cws: edit

Laughing Jack

He spams the chat.. he doesn't mean to hes just very excited to see you (you're literally in the other room)

Lots of typos from him btw, his fingers arent good for phones or other devices

similar to toby he gets into verbal matches with anyone who is being rude or weird in the chat, will verbally obliterate them

if you play games you offer to let him join you... he is... bad at video games... again, his hands arent built friendly for most devices- very large and the claws dont help at all

fights so hard not to pop into frame to give your viewers a scare- if they do ever see him it starts this whole conspiracy theory thing...

uh... have fun with the boost in views from it, i guess?

Ticci Toby

Has probably gotten into arguments with people being weird or rude to you, though obviously he comes from a good place

Tends to fuck with the person rather than actually arguing back, though

likes to sit and watch your streams when he has some breathing room with his job as a proxy, gives him a way to check in on you in a way when hes away

leaves messages in your chat to let you know what hes going to be home so you dont have to worry

gets giddy when he sees you notice his messages

saves some clips to watch for later, a lot of them being out of context

Ben Drowned

Game stream, obviously

sometimes interferes with your streams, less likely to do it if you stream for money though... hes a bit of a jerk but hes not going to mess with your livelyhood

sometimes joins your games if its multiplayer, viewers think hes your little brother or something that sometimes hops on

circling back to interfering i can see him either messing with the game by glitching or crashing it, but i can see him messing with the stream itself... would try to make it creepy by flashing random stuff on screen or playing scary sounds

average trolling, as the kids say or whatever

spams sound effects in the stream

[freakinator]

I've been wondering for a long time. How would you characterise Wemmbu? How he seems in your eyes, your opinion of the guy. I hope I don't sound weird or crazy.

aw dw anon its okay to be curious ^^

regarding my characterization of wemmbu, while there is a lot of consistency in how he acts since hes an improv rper and therefore generally just acts as a polished/exaggerated version of his own self, there are still a few differences in how he acts depending on what smp hes in

general: smarmy, quite pathetic but tries his best to hide it until he literally cant anymore, opportunistic, petty, truthful in that kind of way that makes you doubt him, not quite black and white thinking but can switch up fast when someone does something that presses his buttons (doesnt necessarily trigger when someones just being mean, its specific kinds of things -- mostly has something to do with pride and trust), has a desire to be on top of things but whether or not he indulges in that desire depends on his overall plans and the kind of server hes in, silly but in a lowkey way as in like he presents himself as a normal person which works but only if you dont look closer, lowkey cringey in that uwu kinda way (affectionate), good at one-on-one yapping esp if hes confident & knows more about the situation than the other person but starts to crumble if its either him vs a group or if hes genuinely not confident about something, willing to sacrifice so much just to achieve his goals whatever they may be

kings smp: more opportunistic and a lot more willing to lie & manipulate & betray, crab mentality very high but he holds it back since indulgin in all of it at once isnt very good for his plans

challenge smps: like kings smp but even More willing to lie & manipulate & betray, has a stronger crab mentality since the whole point of the smp is to win and he really wants to win and he knows he wont be seeing these ppl in this context again anyway so hes willing to do whatever it takes even if it means betraying his allies, << does Not apply to team challenges btw he will be very loyal until hes given a reason to betray such as believing the others are betraying them first

lifesteal smp: had a good grasp of what it means to be a lifestealer right from the get go but has struggled a bit in figuring out what that means for him exactly so he still has a bit of that new guy stench if you get what i mean (this characterization becomes less and less prominent the later in the timeline it is), has been very loyal thus far and is more than happy to point that out, average level of lifestealer aggressiveness, i like to parallel him with zam mirror-style due to them having opposite thought processes but coming to similar conclusions (pic below of unfinished draft ive had for ages cause idk how to word my thoughts regarding this properly other than 'the vibes')

unstableverse: very obvious mirror parallel to zam that i honestly wouldnt be surprised if it was on purpose, kinda hard talking about his motivations and character devoid of context regarding zam considering he spent 4 out of 5 eps as a major character (even when he isnt actually there lmao) and wemmbu spent 3 of those 4 eps obsessing over him but i will try my best, can be a bit of a stalker but only if he really cares about whatever it is the guy hes stalking is doing/potentially doing, no empathy (affectionate), generally doesnt care that much about individual players but when he gets attached he gets Attached for better or worse, zeroes in on his goals even to his own and others' detriment, a lot more pathetic than in other smps or at least has a harder time hiding his patheticness, also may just be me but i think hes more pessimistic?? not entirely sure tho

overall i think hes pretty neat! pretty cute and silly but also devious and mischievous, if i could shake him in a can i would

[saltymothball]

my unpopular takes on beetlejuice beetlejuice SPOILERS!! (long post)

(i am a fan of the original pls do not come for me) these are just my thoughts on the sequel :D please feel free to add yours too

context! im writing these notes as i watch so theyre a little disorganized

for reference i also rewatched the original immediately prior to the sequel

not opening with the classic beetlejuice muisic ?? even the stage show opens with that music where is it (EDIT- restarted it and it actually does open w the music, but it is much less fun/campy an and more of a spooky remix so i forgot)

its not plot necessary but i do wish we learned how BJ fixed his shrunken head and death by sandworm

where are the maitlands ???? 0 mention of adam and barbra at the beginning ?

BJ's ex wife intro was a very creative concept but i wish they did it with more sfx props and less cgi/green screen

Astrid is like very boring, theyve done nothing to get the audience (me) invested in her?? disney wish vibes like who is she

call it a headcanon i feel like lydia wouldnt be this fucking awkward of a parent ?? she had good role models ie adam and barbra (even if her own parents werent as active, by the end of the original movie it implied they were now living in a healthy family dynamic

the mother daughter drama feels really forced, reminds me of the out-of-place tension between wednesday and morticia in the 2023 show

all angles are super close up and feel like horror angles. the scene where astrid befriends that boy ?? felt like someone was gonna come up and kill them the ENTIRE interaction (edit i guess that makes sense but it nerfed the scene)

IMMEDIATELY knew his parents are dead btw. not showing their faces is so clearly they are dead. not an ounce of mystery. theory the boy might be a ghost too?

theory astrids dad isnt dead bc Lydia cant see him

the witching hour wrong ?? last i knew it was 3am not 12am. weird thing to get wrong

its like not a silly campy vibe ?? its like uncomfortable.

dont like lydias new man hes pushy and gross

i miss adam and barbra

it doesnt make sense that no one taking lydia seriously ? delia knows she can see ghosts and has also experienced beetlejuice

lydias fiance is a horrid excuse for a partner (how tf did she meet him like did he just walk in bc the plot needed another person to hate lydia

not the dead protester joke :(

the spill-your-guts/pregnancy felt really idk,,, icky??? dont know how to explain it but it uncomfortably long

follow up- a lot of the visual ghost gags felt very gross/gorey ? like in the original movie the gags were inbetween silly/sexual/spooky-but this one feels more like blood and guts instead of spiders and snakes. exhibit A) otho casually shoving corpse barbra out of the way when looking at the closet with delia / exhibit b) the guy with the cigarettes at the end of the original

theory that astrid is going to end up seeing ghosts by the end of the movie

love the "eeee!" noise BJ makes when people say his name

ok BJ with the guitar after lydia tells him off was legitimately funny

i know astrid is an angsty teen but my god she is so hostile towards lydia

calling it at 56mins the boys parents are SO dead bc they deliberately didnt have lydia meet them

listen i have nothing against jenna ortega but it feels like she is type-casted to play exactly one character now, like let the girl play something other than a monotone gothy teen

"they found a loophole and moved on" okay whatever that means

astrids awkwardness w this ghost boy is pretty cute. he is so definitely a ghost though

yup called it hes a ghost

"my mom was telling the truth... shit" lmao

this boy feels very sus bc why are you trying to bribe her w her father

still no info on how lydia and rory met ??

MURDER HOUSE ?? TH BOY IS A MURDERER ??? okay thats a good twist ill give them that

astrid going into the afterlife to see her dad feels very "lydia going to the afterlife to see her mom" plot from the stage show ?

astrid honey you have too much faith in this ghost boy

oh my fucking god delia did you really get poisonous snakes....so on brand for her

Beetlegeuse literally carrying the whole movie

every scene he's in is absolutely giving

william dafoe is pretty good too but adding him just feels like he is william dafoe and not the character hes playing (who is also an actor)

delia correcting herself from saying fuck is really funny like girl was that scripted

okay ok astrd seeing her dad working in immigration was pretty neat

i had actually forgotten abt BJs ex wife until now ? doesnt seem like she actually adds much to the story beyond giving BJ a new reason to pursue lydia... which he was already doing...?

are they all going to end up in the afterlfe wtf

the afterlife desert takes place on the fucking moon of saturn ?? okay

is it just me or is the sandworm not claymation... like maybe its just the way it looks but i swear it looks like they cgi'd it but then cut down the frame rate

damn lydias husband really got eaten by piranhas.. what a way to die oh my god

there was no real stakes to astrid switching her soul? they resolved that so fast like lydia just grabbed her and they ran

oh their husband/dad is back now everything is fixed...? like all that hate towards her mom is now gone bc her mom was telling the truth about seeing ghosts? dad just resolved the only conflict

beetlejuice didnt even help get astrid back he went on a pee break and the plot progressed

love bad cop william defoe

"are you filled with fear and trembling?" "yes im shitting my pants" absolutely gold

BJ on fetchquests this whole movie fr

the soul sucking lady please she ate bobs nametag :(

ok wtf they really solved ghost boy dilemma in 5 seconds, BJ ex machina... like he rlly just got him like that ??? anticlimactic

ok good astrid apologized for being a shitty kid

rory please stop kissing lydias neck

i kind of hate the modern nods like the self securing seatbelt in the priests car, or the influencers at the wedding, really weird unnecessary detail

BJ and Delia wedding crashers my fav

how did Beetlejuice get into the church ? if he is a demon like previously established, shouldnt he NOT be able to step on holy ground

enjoyed the slapstick moment of lydia punching rory, good moment

her red dress omg !! pretty

BJ himself is just too funny, making the priest sing top tier

i still miss adam and barbra :( if they can cgi that dead guy in star wars i think we couldve brought alec baldwin and geena davis who are in fact still very alive and look great

they really didnt make me interested in BJs ex wife other than she is pretty and looks like morticia addams ?

BJ making everybody partake in singing is very silly

everybody dancing at the wedding scene must have been fun to film, everybody looks like theyre jamming

lmao whos dog was that in the hallucinations ?? is that the dog who killed the maitlands

"ghoul squad" ok monster high

oh finally his ex is here

lydia so casually pushed out of the way lmao

why does BJ have more etherial powers than every other ghost?

offering rory to the soul sucking lady is so good

theyre really just gonna sandworm for the plot resolution again ???

his ex wife was a threat for all of 4 seconds

lol the legal marriage loophole was kinda funny

is delia like forever dead ? is she a ghost now? is beetlejuice dead?

i still love delia. "i will find charles and we will haunt you both" good for her

are the influencer wedding guests dead

everything got wrapped up very quickly

good on delia for still loving her husband even though that shark absolutely annihilated him

what ?? astrid is married now???

WHAT ??? SHES GIVING BIRTH ?????

oh ok its a dream

having a second pregnancy bit felt really weird

they alluded to another sequel :(

please remember i am actually a huge fan of beetlejuice !! no hate to the franchise these are just my personal opinions on the sequel. i would love to hear your thoughts as well !!

[centipedve]

been scouring the regretevator wiki cause i was curious (terrible wiki btw i am so sorry. one page has a citation that just links to some discord bullshit which people who are not in the server obviously cant see) anyways i am getting a terrible impression of the creator(?) and i would be interested in your thoughts on this business if youd be willing to share :3

oh goodness gracious... well we do have Some thoughts and we dunno if they match your own concerns since, we purposefully don't go out looking for whatever the creator has said but yeah even from a distance it's. Not looking good. (Already mentioned some of these before but for the sake of putting it in one place we'll be redundant)

definitely has his own takes on certain characters, headcanons, and the like. it was silly at first but as time went on and the more effort he put into pushing negativity over certain things the less fun it became. we think, if you want people to dislike a character, you try and make them dislikeable within the context of the story and then let people form those opinions. rather than being weird about the fact that there are still people who do like the character and punishing them by denying them the most basic things or even involving them in the story at all because Doesn't Deserve It. yes this is primarily about unple/asant

related but... too much of a reliance on telling stories with twitter or other unofficial platforms. did we learn nothing from the dumbledore is gay tweet. like a huge amount of information on the wiki that is very important to understanding the characters are just is NOT in the game, like if you played the game fully you'd still need to rely on the wiki to be able to participate in fandom. honestly a large part of that is why we're so biased towards certain characters! unple/asant and infe/cted are the only characters with lore and trivia and such that we've bothered to go on the wiki for and memorize. we've played the game for hours and hours but that doesnt mean much lol. once again, unple/asant especially, it literally DOESN'T TALK or participate in ANY of the active dynamic story because Doesn't Deserve It but there's still things to know about unple/asant and people who like the game just want something!! like dunno the overuse of social media in storytelling just makes it so much more unfun, we don't like how information is released and the fact that we need to rely on external material that... is sometimes taken back because the creator has gone on record Just Saying Shit. favorite example vv

Which is really funny considering it has 1 piece of dialogue on the game. So it can physically speak, and is also not "mewing 24/7" by result of having that dialogue (pretty sure the creator was just encouraged to say that without giving a fuck but, whatever). but the things that happen in game are second to the creator's twitter feed AMIRIGHTFELLAS

3. the,. the ableism. we've heard people tried to bring it up with the creator in the past and they were ignored so we feel comfortable mentioning it lol. bi/ve is a stereotype of someone who suffers from paranoia really, we mean we love her but... lol... and we will say it again pe/st should not canonically have npd or aspd. like omggg the evil character that robs people has two pds negatively stereotyped as belonging to evil people we're sure there was no bias in this decision. maybe we'd be less bothered if people didn't treat it as so serious and pretend to be cluster b allies like "you have to give him some understanding cuz he has aspd and npd 🥺" like no because he's evil, also maybe it wouldn't hurt to care about real people with those pds instead of a caricature. also the half-hearted throwing around of the word "mute" for unple/asant has been pointed out as ableist by a lot of people.

tldr uhhh wuhgghh NOT A PERSONAL ATTACK nobody get us (: nobody talk us...

[littleeyesofpallas]

man im in a weird headspace recently... first The One headcanons, and now this... that's a lotta thoroughly dead content i'm giving brain space to

So, in the now tragically forgotten and buried jrpg franchise, Wild Arms, there was this whole fun gimmick where the wild west influence extended into other tangential americana as well. there's heavy borrowing from D&D, and horror films as well as westerns, and classic romanticized cowboy mythos and such... So in any case the games also had a few cross media spinoffs, including a TV anime and a shortlived manga.

There is a character in the manga named Jye-chi-ka[ジェチカ] which the brave, lone scanlator team, TurtleParadise --back in... what, 2010?-- romanized as Jessica. But I don't know if that's correct.

For context, the other two leads in the series are named Ma-ku-shi Re-mi-n'-to-n'[マキシ・レミントン] transliterated back into Maxi Remington, a clear reference to the Remington Arms Company, his sister, ko-ne-tto[コネット] taken to be something like Conette or Connett, and Gy[ギィ] who they called Guy, as in the French name, which I think was the correct choice. But as you can sort of see, apart from the Remington bit, the names don't appear to be overt references to anything else to help triangulate Jechika's name.

Jechika is btw a member of a minority group of native American analogs within the Wild Arms world, semi-consistent across different games, called the Baskar. Some other Baskar have been named things like...

Tim Rhymeless and Colette Mapleleaf in WA2; both rather innocuous names... And the family of Gallows, Shane, and Halle Carradine in WA3, much more overtly referencing the iconic scene of lawless frontier justice, Shane from the movie Shane, and Halley's comet plus actor David Carradine, probably tied to this thru the now infamous cult classic TV show, Kung Fu, where producer meddling outed Bruce Lee as lead in favor of having David Carradine play Kwai Chang Caine, a wandering shaolin monk in the wild west.

But this all, as you may be catching onto, also does not help establish clear patterns to help with...

Some random NPCs have names like Harold, Ellen, Cordell, and Laraina? Funny enough these I can sort of tie into references with a bit of guess work.

Cordell in particular stands out as a less common name to have picked here, and I want to assume it's a reference to Cordell Walker, Chuck Norris' star character in Walker Texas Ranger.

In the context of wild west icons, legendary outlaw, Ellen Liddy "Cattle Kate" Watson is the first to come to mind.

I have no idea what to make of Harold... Harold Gould? Semi-famous character actor in TV and film of the 60s-70s? He hardly seems reference worthy, he didn't exactly have a lot of standout roles... Harold McCracken? Sort of famous painter of pseudo-historical wild west scenes? Are those names a random Japanese game dev would have really been able to stumble into in the 2000s? It's the name "Harold" it could be practicallyanyone...

And technically "Laraina"'s name is actually written ri-re-i-na[リレイナ] so that one could just be a localization flub. Actually, it appears to be how they japanized the name of Wynona Rider's character in the 1994 movie, Reality Bites; the character's name is Lelaina Pierce. It's far from being a western but it does take place in Texas, for a Japanese creator maybe that's cowboy adjacent enough?)

So I dunno... Maybe it is Jessica and it's just a weird choice of names because the manga author doesnt have access to the core creative team's specific sensibilities. Maybe it doesn't matter because the core team's sensibilities are also unstable. And if anything, it feels vaguely slavic to me? Like, the way those phonetics roll off the tongue to me sounds like it ought to be something like Tetscheka? Dzhetgya?? Czeschka(like the painter)??? But why would anyone have named a native american analog in some sort of pseudo-slovenian?

I realize this is a cold case. And one without any real answers. But it's one of those things that drives me nuts when I look up somethings simple like, "What were those characters' names again?" and then find myself having wasted the morning on a wild goose chase and now i'm late for work...

[stray-tori]

An Innocent Sin & the good gay flashback ft. my descent into madness

I wasn’t sure if I should post this but I mostly want it archived so here we go. This is from like,, September?

So. “An Innocent Sin” is a dumpster fire unlike anything I’ve ever seen. I don’t remember why I decided to read it. maybe I was crazy. Either way... I read it. It soon started to touch upon (very very outlandish) sexual abuse which I thought was interesting. (the angst, not so much some of the wack circumstances surrounding it)

ANYWAY. at some point... we have a flashback. And not just that. It has a gay character.

And it turns rly gay. which mind you, is still in a het smut manwha (that has a “gay” side couple, but still!)

And it destroyed me.

For those who want to read it because I genuinely think the flashback is a decent bit, it’s all the bonus chapters between chapter 77 and 78 I think. There’s a part before that too, but idk where exactly anymore. (It’s on lezhin! or your platform of choosing)

I don’t THINK you’ll need any other knowledge to get the flashback bit? but it’s been a while.

Below the cut (rip mobile users), you can read all of my amazing reactions (all of these were text messages, for context - but I took most of the replies and convos about other things out). Post is also tagged as long post. :))

(i’m serious, this is fucking long)

__________

Here I am. Liking the gay flashback character. Feck. Main dude is still straight but idk it's cute pff

This is a mess. The girl white hair likes, likes black hair, maybe, but thinks white hair is attractive

What just happened is sth I'd like to know too pff He's so cute tho omg. Watch me melt Can we stay in this flashback before everything got perverted af and before white hair gets assaulted all the time I would send an eyebrow emote if I could Context: he's asking he says it again

Ik it's not mutual but loookkk he's so sweet. He's kinda rude in present time, can't we stay in this flashback forever

I never asked for gay, never expected gay but I got gay

This story is trash why am I still reading it shdhhd

He caught his mom cheating. And now she's forcing him to watch??? What is thissss Well adoptive mom But still sudhdidu what Bitch how dare YOU exist

Save my babyyyy

Yay sister that's not yet a rapist to the rescueee

This flashback is actually just nicer in every way let's just stay here This is a super long flashback btw Idek anymore what triggered it

Okay I think I'm gonna make the sensible decision and let this dumpster fire rest and just go sleep

It was very wild. I kinda wanna see white hair get therapy but it has 90 chapters and I'm at like 30... So I'm very concerned this is gonna be very dragged out. Idek if it's even finished ahahsududi - but I do kinda wanna see where it goes and see more cute Noah (white hair) so. Here we are.

yeahhh like i was down for the sexual abuse angst but then the mother killed the adoptive son's mother bc the dad had a thing for her?? and it was someone a person studying with white hair knew and so he's investigating and I'm like how did this turn into a crime organisation kind of plot

hhhhhhh i... i appreciate these horny things also tackling abuse but it always kind of gives me weird vibes to have both, especially when its very horny. And when people are horny to people who've been abused. Idk but I'd assume... you might try NOT to tie them up if they're frequently bondaged during their assaults. I'm just.... disjdksdj hello?? am i weird?? why are they fine with it???

also this manwha is so wild, theres this murder mystery investigation thing and then theres just a couple doing honry stuff sprinkled in between and i'm like OKAY

they rescued a guy in their basement and he's understandably very traumatized and they're trying to question him cut to our main couple trying bondage which i still dont understand bECAUSE HE'S A RAPE VICITM WHY ARE YOU OKAY WITH THIS the ones questioning arent the main couple of course but idshkjds

like im glad he's somehow okay with all this horny stuff despite his trauma and im glad he can be happy and have a nice relationship but DO WE NEED THIS MUCH OF IT he's very cute tho

i like that even when i try other stuff lezhin recommends me it still has large amount of gay in it

[mei: i mean... that's pretty great, if you ask me]

I mean I agree, I'm enjoying the gay eheheh these tonal whiplashes there's not even that much white space between the panels fhjd nvm it just turned horny goddamn it can there be 1 chapter without fucking? okay, there were the flashbacks

WE ARE BACK IN FLASHBACKS but im not getting the gay relationship, sad

OH WAIT AM I GETTING GAY COMFORT bc thats very good too

OH NNOOO this turned sad very quickly

I'M SORRY IM SPAMMING BUT THIS IS JUST ANGSTY

I'M :((((

different species confirmed

I rly like them :((( I like the current girl too but it's just..... very horny with her. the flashbacks are nice [current tori edit: she’s very unloyal idk why i said I liked her] im weird HHHHH RIPPP 

someone help him he looks so saddddd

not sure if thats the most healthy relationship but I'LL TAKE IT

AWWW black hair's mom cooks mild food for them bc Noah can't eat spicy food :((( im soft

PFFF

I LOVE THE FLASHBACKS :(((

awww

i feel like theyve done much more bonding than noah's current relationship. I mean yes I think its cute when she comforts him, too, but they rarely do anything besides be horny together

OH OH THEY'RE KISSING

best buildup, honestly

the position is hornier than I'd like later here goes hope it stays cute

D-did someone just respect the word "stop"??? I am amazed

i think you might uh. have some trauma stuff too so yknow

Dohye is a little dramatic in his reassurance but it's all rly cute so I'm :(( I like them a lot pls stay like this getting invested in flashbacks is always like: ik it wont stay but pls stay like this

hELP

chapters ending in "i wanna touch him" is never good. I'm scared. Oh okay he didnt do anything. PHEW. He's already better than the girl, can't they just end up together lmao

[Noah was jealous]

w-why do you look so evil dohye haukdhjs

oh. oh no. the horny is starting. pls dont... just be cute forever

DOHYE NO YOU WERE SO DECENT WHY ARE YOU LYING ABOUT KOREAN TRADITIONS TO GET HIM TO DO STUFF HORNY STUFF TOO NO PLS STOP I JUST- WHEEE TvT the manwha is actually less visually horny in the flashbacks but im not sure if its bc its BL which isnt rly the genre of the manwha or if its bc they're still kids basically, which... I'd respect the latter, tho I'd prefer it to be like this constantly haha

okay. he's not respecting stop anymore, but it's also more of embarrassed nature more than "no i dont want this stop" so maybe i can forgive it. Still losing points, but he hugged him and it was sweet so HHHHHHHHHHH NOT SURE HOW I SHOULD JUDGE THIS SITUATION

They [Noah’s family] forbid him to visit his friends house I AM DEVASTATED

understandable they're a rapist, a fucked up murderer mother and a father with a thing for younger women so

tho he dont know any of that but yknow he's so pretty just fucking end me on the spot

hooo

they are boyfriends and ik from the future that his sister is gonna ruin it allll she has those drugs that make visual imaginations feel like they rly happened to the person (dont know if thats real but holy fuck its terrifying) and she's used it before to say that Noah assualted her. and im pretty sure shes gonna use it again bc there was a panel of Noah remembering Dohye being uhhhh intimate with her and thats why Noah began to hate him and im so sad im not ready for it. bc he's denied it in the future and i honestly couldnt see it happening even before that or she drugged Dohye, i guess thats a possibility too

[current tori: oh girl, it’s neither and it’s wack]

which if, btich you gonna die even more enough rambling, more reading. this makes me so sad but also spicy

on the manwha note, he thinks Noah doesnt like his family bc he's adopted and doesnt feel comfy which....... fair enough i suppose. and he's so cute im gonna melt just looK AT THIS 

SHUt UP, IM GONNA CRY

OH MY GODDDD he ate like ice and gum and all that, and Dohye assumed it was bc of the more spicy food and got rl worried, but he was just trying to get the smell out of his breath bc he wanted to kiss him ukhsdjs HOW CAN YOU BE SO CUTE HELLLOOOOOOOOO

look at them. LOOK AT mY BABIESSSS

how am i ever gonna care about the main couple again aww he-he wanted to go to the same highschool as him :((( im sad bc i know its not gonna happennnnnn

[mei: also at this point, you're literally never gonna care about them. i don't even know the main couple that well and i honestly don't care about them whatsoever.]

WAIT NO they're actually going to the same school awww ik it wont take long until sister fucks it up for them but for now theyre so sweet ohmygodddd

cant he move in with them, fuck his family honestly

dohye he's not a fucking pokemon iukhsdjs

oh. its. turning horny i am displeased with this development but i guess its natural for their relationship however COULD YOU DO IT AT HOME AND NOT IN SOME DUSTY SMALL ROOM how do ppl do this i like that the comments too are just "... is anyone still carng about the other girl?" sakjds

this is the best 3 panels in existence.

h-he just took your hand dohye idk what to tell you

[mei: "you blush at everything i do" god if that isn't me, idk what is]

awww its cute dohye is getting bonus points bc he invited Noah over while his mom wasnt home, they watched some sexual stuff and he DIDNT try to do anything what is this where can i get more of this

"well im not okay"

MY BABIESSSS 

they still didnt do much btw they're just kinda exploring and its honestly nice TvT I dont want this to ever endddd

[Dohye sees Noah’s sister and approaches her] N O

N OOOO

this is the starttttt of something.......... TERRIBLEEEE 

:((( babyyyy

I AM EMO

Noah was drugged im sure. hes having dreams and waking up in pain and the sister is asking doyhe over I DONT LIKE THISSSSSSS OH HE DECLINED

OKAY OKAY he saw him with her again but it was from behind and im not sure if it rly happened??? oh no this is terrible. Noah :((( poor child

i am so emo about this

[reminder he’s been abused TvT]

[the sister: “Don’t you want to know why?”]

i will. murder someone he called to ask her to delete his number btw what is this manwha but this is just gonna make it that more tragic when whatever happens that breaks them apart :(((

he's such a good bf but Noah just wont TELL him his side I'M SO SAD

I AM SO SAD

No

NO

It cant end im actually tearing up nooo you were so cuteeee and happpyyy

[*sister is telling dohye to come to the gym hall*]

what else is she gonna do she already teared [current tori: ahem... T O R E] them apart THAT'S NOT DOYhE. THATS NEVER HIM. OH MY GOD. is it a look alike??? damn, she's dedicated to just. ruining it, huh

I’M

I’M SO SAD

now he's switching SCHOOLS NO NOOOOO how will i ever find happiness againnnn NO they're misunderstanding further they're not talking properly i mean i get it but oh my god

I'M :((( 

NO NOOOO pls make up in the future at least omg he tried to clear it up tooo ahhh i dont even have hopes for them getting back together but i just i want them to clear it up im crying first manwha to make me cry and it's this dumpster fire ahaha maybe a little too bc it kinda hit a little close to home i guess but goddamnn ittttt they were so cuteee and so happy and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OH NO. Noahs getting drugged and assaulted. And he's realizing it happened before, he just forgot. I am. so sad it's not horny drawn either which i appreciate but MY HEART NO

N O DONT YOU DARE MAKE THIS WORSE

Im. gonna cry more 

Doyhe kept an eye on him im so emo :(( but he thought he was doing well enough and gave up.... Im im so sad no i want you to make up and get back together its all just a stupid........... MEHHHH will i ever find sth like this flashback again

[mei: p-probably not, no]

i am so devasted i dont even wanna go back to the main couple just fucking. i want this relationship back :(((( but i guess the investigation might end up somewhere so hhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhh the baker manwha had a similar flashback feeling so. i just gotta find more of that haha

BUT THIS WAS SO SAD??? im so emo

[Dohye got kidnapped // the flashback commentary stops here but I think my descend into madness is pretty funny too]

OH YEAH THAT HAPPENED. THE FLASHBACK WAS SO LONG I FORGOT. NOOOO SAVE HIM. JESUS CHRIST PLS JUST ONE GOOD THING

its. actually rly smart to have another, more focused on them flashback, before the arc where he gets kidnapped by the rapist murder household so. good job. from a meta perspective but also NO but also. maybe theres hope for them making up at least after all :(((

[main couple kissing] this is. very weird now. but im glad he has someone, he deserves it but dohyeeeee

and switching to sex, YET AGAIN now i wanna see this EVEN LESS THAN I DID BEFOREEEE it's even.... a threesome now with one of the other characters why are you like this why can't you be. like in the flashback i am so upset HAHHHHH WHEEEZEEEE

I am just stop fucking jesus christ PLEASE I DONT WANNA SEE IT ANYMOREEEEE

im just stop the horny pls just tell me who that new guy is and why doyhe likes him so much

[mei: this manwha is a fucking mess but at least we got your lovely commentary out of it]

dhsuksj thanks i feel honored at least i got cute BL out of it before everything went [back] to shit

[mei: THAT TOO]

[...]

tbh im getting kinda mad about doyhe... i dont... feel like he'd just fall instantly for a guy who looks like Noah... but eh not my character

i just want closure for dohye at this point, fuck everything else ... not literally pls theres already too much of that

pls get it together for like 1 chapter is the investigation even still happening i am so confused save dohye plEASE wait what i have less than 10 episodes left Dont tell me this shit isnt even wrapped up yet

[Dohye is having a breakdown over the Noah double not coming to see him anymore]

yeah i this... doesnt feel like Dohye... at all... Even when Noah was rejecting him he was just kind of... taking it with some humor and maybe he was a little desperate and risky sometimes but... oh well... i do want him to get better but... im having a hard time believeing this development??? he never seemed overly anxious or anything. but who knows what else they did to him. Sister can still go fuck off tho

[...]

i mean. i liked the flashbacks a lot honestly??? it stayed simple and focused on the dynamics and less trying to balance smut with murder plots

[dm partner: NO THAT'S WHAT I MEAN LIKE CLEARLY THE AUTHOR CAN MAKE A GOOD STORY SO I'M JUST... CONFUSED AS TO WHY THEY DIDN'T STICK WITH SOME SOFT, FLUFFY BL ROMANCE MANWHA AND DECIDED TO MAKE WHATEVER THIS IS INSTEAD ]

okay i dont care bc dohye is currently getting assaulted nobody asked for this why i just. this is terrible. he was... so sweet. he doesnt deserve this. nobody does of course but jesus christ pls someone save him at least its not horny visually, one saving grace

ah... the assult is back to being depicted horny-ly thank you for nothing

[... removed some general confusion about the plot]

YES. SOME SHIP FOOD.

i am. suffering i mean i cant stop but GOD

okay so apparantly. the sister. has just an arsenal of people who look like other people Dohye, then Noah... and even Noah's GF??? this is ridiculous??

one good message 

why 

did you feel the need to add that [actual tired rage]

im gonna die this manwha is gonna kill me im laughing but im suffering oh hes arrested great and thats the end and the last update was in january of this year

why AS IN NOAH IS ARRESTED nobody who actually did anything is arrested What is this why is this AHHH I at least wanted the complete-ness of finishing this but now I'M JUST SUFFERING

[ mei: I MEAN TO BE FAIR I'D BE SUFFERING TOO BC JUST... WHAT THE FUCK I HAVE?? MANY QUESTIONS?? AND MANY CONCERNS BC THIS MANWHA IS JUST... AN EXPERIENCE ]

its an experience allright WELL

_______________

yup that’s it.

in my head, in a twist of events Dohye and Noah make up and are actual endgame. Something like that must exist out there but I won’t ask because it’d destroy the surprise and ruin the point.

That’s it.

Have a nice day.

[sikereviewdotcom]

johnny bravo -  johnny goes to bollywood (pre-movie)

so clearly it wasnt the movie, i have no idea what episode this was really “episode 1″ was written the video had 4k views and the channel was obscure

but thats beyond the point since im still gonna review the shit out of this episode:

first to begin 

were greeted by a lovely bunch of indian women dancing and chanting in an inexistant language i guess (ps: the episode was in indian i think for some reason i havent looked it up either they actually have like i know the movie is americano-indiano w/e but why is this specific episode, which is it even an episode? i shoulda asked for a more precise one but who cares i dont 

so after being greeted by this, kinda racist doe but its the 90s the world still evolving cant except much from them can we? ill let it slide but its losing points not surprising but not cool anyway racism aint rad yo 

moving on: we see johnny laying on his couch, what he gonna do? well after watching an ad for “jiggy’s jiggalicious (extra-sexy-sexiness-leveling-up) hair gel” he decides to order some quick by the phone and dring drang the mailman comes to him quick and good 

handing the true power (gel) for johnnys hair, amazing really but like johnny doesnt even need it look at his fucking hair guys obviously the guy already puts an incredibly amount of gel actually this is what he looks like without his gel 

so im taking them a few points down there cause thats denying that johnnys hair is actually pretty well stylized in a jock kinda way but nah johnny aint even this close to that its different still adding +2 points to see his great french fries au naturel if you know what i mean,

next thing you know 

the gel works and johnny gets all the chicks outside like really ALL of them and not even only chicks an elephant, men, cars or w/e its a mess he learns fast that with great powers come great responsabilities but johnny isnt about it that guy literally sent the bill to his mama what are responsabilities? how is he even living alone? why is he in bollywood???? who the fuck knows, now it is

“johnnywood”

quickly he meets little girls, i feel like children helping johnny out or him seeking help to them is pretty much a recurring event in there like hes the lil oliver of the streets dogs kinda going with the big dogs trynna life that lifestyle learn the rules by them except he is the adult one and theyre just kids no ones gonna teach you shit johnny because you dont get teached in this hood you get ditched 

still pretty epic music going on there digged that dancing johnny sequence with his new hairstyle i get that his moves were great as i just said but apparantly the kids are the only ones not affected by them btw, because the hair gel makes him throws some sike dance there and there which charms people by zapping them with a sexiness-ray-lasers w/e 

now that he learned how dangerous the power of being hot and so sexy no one can resist you like no one and with the help of little girls (who are only helping against bubblegum otherwise ofc little girls wouldnt randomly help a grown man dancing 24/24h thats wack too wack and shit thank god johnny is mentally a kid or not? actually nothing can make it, out of contxt, less weird thinking about an adult man who keeps flexing hanging out with little girls daily or mostly so quite often either its his neighbour or just randos 

so next they try many things to stop j from being sexy except one thing ill tell later 

nothing works so johnny, pinky (youngest girl) and shinky (the older one) go to seek help from the great jiggy himself but the guard wont let them in like this

to get him to let them in our handsome fella shakes his muscles and 

the guard falls under his charm and let him in 

finally we meet jiggy himself and hes surrounded by his main and side hoes an entire harem of hot chicks all laying and touching him as he sits on his big throne slash chair, quickly THE MAN asks if johnny tried out all his different gels to which he answers positively after a flashback of everything theyve tried before coming to him and so ((ps: i want you guys to know about the two fucking great songs  following up in this scene (one with jiggy the man (i do not like that guy tbh  have you guys seen his ass? terrible its not even about his ass fuck his vibes is all i only go by johnny who has an excuse to be dumb(( aside from being a himbo))

back to whipping your sheeps: the question: “have you washed your hair with water?”

ofc he hasnt so we discover a big thing here, bravo is dumb so very dumb man wait no that aint a surprise yet it still has something behind it: how often does he even shower? he must be well kept since he takes big pride in his body though he just forgot to wash his hair with water? crazy idk what to think of this ill give my final words on this episode after the quick explaination im giving you here

so thats it btw he goes wash his hair, everything is back to normal, hes back in the getting-slapped after the good old “hot mamma” the balance is back on track 

in conclusion? 

well everyone  this was a very revealing episode and also one of the episodes where our man actually gets the chicks and the zoo but also  we learn shit like: 

he is in bollywood today! wow! gonna -1 this because it was not explained why and yea ill prob check the movie out

he forgets about washing your hair with water: asks the question “how many fucking times a month does he? is it all gel?” 

im downgrading this episode from 8 letters because of jiggys appareance fuck him and his ass, harem and whatnot 

also it was in indian(???) this is neutral im just reminding you the context ( yes the voices were fitting enough)

final thoughts: this was an average episode the music was 6/10(basic bollywood) , johnny acted like he always does: no brain cells are available theyre all cooking themselves some protein bars  as the other fews are taking fitness classes as we speak so they cant do their job 

what saved this? bravos moves thats all i have to say on this matter

tg, out

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

HIStory’s ranked (no one asked, but here i go)

so i was sittin here, talkin to myself about the HIStory series’ and was like ‘hey, i should rank them’ (which i’ve seen a few other people do, but mines a lot more rambling than there’s because i can’t shut up lol) 

so here’s my views lol (ordered from worst to best, imo):

6) My Hero (HIStory1) -

probably universally acknowledged as the worst episode, and i’d be inclined to agree with the masses on this lol... not only is the tone and humour of this series so weird and disjointed, but the entire story line literally makes no sense lol?? it’s unclear who the audience should be rooting for (especially as it goes out of it’s way to paint our protagonist as really unlikable lol, not to mention the love interest is the dullest character ever conceived like ???), as well as this the ending feels completely unrelated and bizarre... 

i think this concept /could/ have worked if the guy the woman was inhabiting (which sounds weird without context, but like she’s dead lol) was somehow also inside his head? or if she got to see his memories or whatever & tries to adjust her personality to match the guy’s, causing love interest!dude to fall in love with the guy... (like i could go into more detail, i basically hav an entire au written in my head lol, but yh...)... that way, her letting go of him in the end would feel so much more well set up? especially if she was generally more understanding and likeable.. 

i think overall this series just fails in telling a decent story lol... & the cringe is even beyond what i can handle lol

5) Obsessed (HIStory1) -

people might be surprised to see this one so low down, especially since i know a lot of people really love this series (& if u do, no hate to u btw, ur allowed to like whatever u want idc), but i realllllly don’t like this series... like at all ...

the plot is weird anyway, which isnt inherently a bad thing, but then u add on the really bad couple and it’s just...... bad lol... like everything about their relationship is built on lies and deceit, and even more so than that it’s built on a lack of mutual respect and fundamental trust for each other! tall guy (i don’t know names soz) feigns memory loss in order to get closer to short guy (btw, the scenes with them being domestic were really sweet, & i firmly believe this could have been an alright series for the actors if the story line wasn’t so bad), short guy’s whole existence in that universe was a lie lol (like i know there’s no easy way to tell someone ‘lol well i’m technically from the future’ but still), then there’s the whole resolution at the end & it’s just so ??? frustrating lol!

nothing bugs me more than seeing conflict in relationships (on screen or irl) that could be solved simply by TALKING TO EACH OTHER GODDAMNIT & isnt lol... my other issue with this series is the fact tall guy 100% forced himself upon short guy in the tent & like we’re just supposed to accept it cos ?? he’s saying no and pushing away but actually he wants it because he loves tall guy ?? like fuck no i’m not accepting that lol! 

basically, bad & bizarre story & characters, & gross tropes just makes this hard for me to watch and enjoy lol... i think, like in my hero, this could’ve done with being a different story altogether lol... (maybe tall guy actually did lose his memory & he falls for short guy all on his own with no predatory intentions?? idk something like that)

4) Right or Wrong (HIStory2)

this one & my number 3 are very much tied tbh, but this one is just slightly lower just because i’m not as big into the couple as i know a lot of people are... & it’s not necessarily the age gap, cos i dont actually mind age gaps in pairings (just as long as the younger one isnt a minor, obv... and also i think any gap that’s 30+ years is a bit weird lol..).. i think my big problem with this is i dont really see why younger guy (again, i have no idea of any of these characters’ names lol) would fall for the older guy? like the older guy is obvs going thru some issues, and hasnt been taking care of himself or his kid properly because of them, but like we dont rly see a lot of why he’s a great guy? like we get the sense young guy is attracted to him, but like love is more than just thinkin they’re hot lol... idk lol this might just be me tbh i just couldnt see why he’d be interested lol

i did like the whole family side though, and showing how a man who was previously with a woman can still end up with a guy (bisexualityyyyy (or some variation of that thereupon)) is something you dont always see in media, so i thought that was pretty cool! (even if the ex-wife thing was kinda lame lol...) 

i think overall i see what this series was going for, and that it actually did an alright job in some parts... the biggest problem is that it’s kinda just forgettable lol... maybe that’s why people like obsessed so much lol? maybe it was a train wreck but ohh boy at least u wont forget it in a hurry lol!

3) Stay Away From Me (HIStory1) -

i’m a bit torn about this one, cos there are parts of it i actually really like (them going from rivals/enemies to being good friends to being more), and other parts i really didnt (the stereotypical squealing yaoi fangirl friend)... & tbh, i kinda wish this had just been a show about the budding friendship between the 2 guys... it almost feels too forced to me that they’re made to ‘fall in love’ when i actually think them both becoming less selfish and learning to respect each other as step brothers & friends is actually already a really great story (& i know that it doesnt fit with the whole ‘HIStory’ thing, but stories of platonic brotherhood/’bromance’ are just as important as gay representation... isnt a /substitute/ for representation, don’t get me wrong, but it’s always so beautiful to see decently portrayed non-toxic friendships between guys... ok this is a rant for another day tho shhh)

i think maybe why i like this one more than the other HIStory1′s is because kinda nothing happens lol... it’s not overly complex with weird unexplained magic things happening, it’s just a simple story lol... is it still tropey as hell? of course lol! but i think the ‘realism’ of the world really helps, and i def think this was incorporated more into HIStory 2, which i’m really glad about...

overall, this is a relatively harmless series & is actually quite sweet at times... the kiss is awkward as fuck tho (there, i said it lol...)... it suffers the same forgetability as right or wrong tho... 

2) Crossing the Line (/Boundary Crossing) (HIStory2) -

ok, so here’s a series i 100% love & totally agree with the hype around lol! i hav no interest in volleyball (or any sports tbh), but the way this show handles the friendships and dynamics between the characters is really well done, especially for a series that’s only 8 episodes long! i also really love that none of the characters really fall into any stereotypes (which is a great improvement from HIStory1 i can tell u lol), and are given the space to actually have some growth & nuance at times?! 

(nuance? in MY HIStory series?? it’s more likely than you think!)

the main couple have really amazing chemistry, and the way they get together doesnt feel too out of place or that it’s going to fast, it just sorta flows really nicely... even the side couple are pretty well done (though i wasnt that big into them on my first watch, just cos the whole overbearing older brother thing was kinda annoying... i liked them more as the series went on tho...)

i kinda dont have any major complaints? which is bizarre cos i always hav complaints about things lol... maybe my complaint would be that they all look way too old and attractive to be whatever teenage age they’re supposed to be lol... (but tbh that doesnt take anything away from the story so i’ll forgive them lol...)... i think maybe i wouldnt consider it my favourite because the story line didnt grab me like the number 1... but i really cant fault it in terms of what it delivers lol, legit such a well put together series!

1) Trapped (HIStory3) -

lol i think anyone who’s been following me for the past few months aren’t in the slightest bit surprised this is my number one... i just love it too much lol!

from the incredibly well written and well acted characters, to the interesting and engaging (even if a bit ridiculous) plot, to the beautifully told romance , it really has it all doesn’t it!!! & i think even if this wasnt an enemies to lovers thing (aka one of the most godtier of all fanfic tropes), there’s so many things going for this series that make it worth watching! i have a few complains about editing choices and a few bad trope plot points which were just unnecessary (plus the fact we missed out on a lot of background info on some major characters lol...), but like despite everything this series rly struck a chord with me deep down in my soul lol

i could go waaay more into detail (and maybe i will one day lol... tho not rn, i’m v tired), but the gist of the matter is: i really love trapped lol

(conclusion)

Even though i’ve complained quite a bit here, i am so grateful for the HIStory series’ for bringing really interesting, and a little mad, stories with gay characters and story lines, with a big emphasis on happy endings! there are so many lgbt stories/characters in things that end up dying or just have bad endings, which just sends this horrible message that lgbt people aren’t worthy of having happy endings, which is completely untrue! 

So i look forward to future HIStory’s, even if some of them are gonna be bad (& maybe none will live up to the trapped!shaped bullet firmly lodged in my heart lol)

fin~

[identitycris1s]

this is new

hi hi hi ok just dropping by with another update about life in general. had midterms last week, they were ok, i got an 89 for quant which was 1 mark away from an A but it couldve gone a lot worse so im ok with it as a whole i think. Havent gotten the labour paper back yet but i think thatll be fine too, it wasnt too hard. Been taking this week kind of slow, i think im just getting a bit lazy with school work (things are slightly less crazy cos theres no case study for econ anymore :)) yay) but will probably need to ramp up soon eeep. 

anyway the real update is re: my love life LOL.........been seeing Z quite regularly, at least once a week. i think i like him ... im still trying to figure out if the main reason i like him is cos he seems to like me so much (which feels rly nice btw) but i do think there are several other qualities that i like about him (although its hard for me to disentangle these qualities from the fact that he demonstrably likes me so idk if im seeing him in a particularly good light cos of these qualities or cos of these qualities + he is so nice to me cos he likes me. that was an incoherent ramble! classic)

anyway i think ill add to the pros / cons list cos it just seems to be an efficient way of sorting qualities / flaws:

pros:

- he is very sweet and thoughtful, surprised me with a late night coffee delivery the weekend before midterms 

- he has expressed several times that he likes me and cares for me which tbh makes my heart flutter LOLOL EW.... (why am i so grossed out yet simultaneously touched)

- he remembers little things about me and my life and what im doing

- he is generally fun to be around and easygoing 

- he is knowledgable about things that im not knowledgable about e.g. the world of data science and economics and research and rock climbing

- he is ok with admitting when hes not 100% right :) which is so important!!!!!!!!!!!! to me!!!!!!

- we went rock climbing and it was nice to see him doing smth he enjoyed and be in his element. also he seemed weirdly more physically attractive than before, maybe cos he looked strong LOL yucks

- not rly a pro but he just got a job (which is apparently v well remunerated) which means hes not gonna be a bum (this was a back of mind concern for me)

cons:

- he has less than stellar grammar which even as im saying it im aware is an unfair criticism (esp given that this post is riddled with grammatical sins e.g. 0 apostrophes...but ive alr explained that this is a different problem from bad english cos its on purpose and done in full awareness and in the context of a casual internet medium). anyway he used the word ‘practise’ / ‘advise’ as a noun and he has had a few grammatical slip ups in texts which im not 100% convinced were typos. im considering correcting the ‘ise’ mistakes cos they rly do bug me....anyway this is me being a nitpicky betch haha so lets move on

- he takes so long to reply texts...i mean never more than a day goes by without a text from him but still. again this isnt a fair criticism cos i do the same lol so i guess this isnt rly a con.

- he isnt rly that funny lol he has a weird sense of humour. he recounted some lame joke he did that was GOT related and i was like huh....thats not funny...but anyway. not everyone can be funny haha

- he doesnt seem to read the same kind of things as i do - he seems to be more interested in CEO autobiographies / biographies... which is fine actually, i guess diversity is good. just that we have less common ground. same applies for music taste haha

ok anyway i realised i never updated about the talk we had after brine a couple of weeks back (i think a mere week after my last post). he said he liked me and was serious about this relationship....and i said idk how i feel lolol. i was like ‘it’s only been a month!’ and he was like ‘it’s been 2 months including when we first started texting!’ which is true but...how do you know if you like someone after a mere 2 months of texting them........

anyway its been what, 3 ish months now? i think i probably have a better idea now and would be open to having a talk about where this is going if he initiates it sooooooon also btw he hasnt tried to hold my hand or anything yet. which i guess is out of respeck but also i wouldnt mind if he did. lol. i guess i think it would give me a better feel of whether theres a ~~~~spark~~~~ and if i instinctively recoil then it means there isnt...?? gah idk. will update again soon :)

[justasmallbloginabigklainefandom]

I am extremely curious how dumb this loser has acted this time if your whole fam is like >>>>>>>>

BRUH IT IS TEA TIME

and upfront as i said in the tags, this isn’t super hot scalding tea like the time he cheated, but just dumbfuckery and him not wanting to learn while also being an ass. so yeah no biggie just idioticy but like.... i also hate his guts so lmao so i mentally make it all worse in my head cause i hate him

so my sister and bf work together cause he is kinda creepy and keeps switching jobs when she switches jobs so that he can work with her btw did i tell you he is very controlling and obsessive about her whereabouts he even called my mum once when he couldnt find her on the tracking app that he wanted her to have on her phone ANYWAY also working as a waiter at the same restaurant

and disclaimer: working as a waiter or not having the highest grades do not make you dumb. sheer and utter incompetence to grasp that you’re an idiot and not wanting to improve makes you dumb. he’s the latter.

also context: my entire family has worked in wait staff

BASICALLY he absolutely fucking sucks at his job up till the point where my sister can’t handle working with him and again, it’s his first time waiting tables so he can learn BUT THIS BITCH has the audacity to command my sister all the time and boss her around when my sister points out that he sucks

and we all go: “this is kinda rude and unreal, cause he has no business acting so bossy when he doesn’t even put any effort in his work”

sis: “yeah but he is just trying to be kind he doesn’t want to be bossy or rude”

us: “.... GIRL if he can’t wait tables that is fine but when you call him out on it or want to help him, he gotta know that you know better”

and tbh my entire fam is just like... HOW can she not see this? like, she talks about the crappy stuff he does at work (like rudely yelling from 2 metres apart to guests: “yo, you guys done? want the receipt?” when my sister asks him to ask if guests want the receipt) and she keeps asking for confirmation that she’s not bad for thinking he’s bad at his job (“you guys think that’s weird too, right? i mean, you shouldn’t do that, right? so you say it’s rude, okay, right? i am not wrong in feeling uncomfortable and embarrased, right?”)

so we confirm that it is just bad manners but that he can learn like we all did, since waiting tables is a skill (which, as you read, he puts no effort in), but she still just.... idk... i sometimes thinks she doesn’t want to admit that he is just not the perfect guy that she wants him to be. and she knows that he isn’t perfect. one thing that i GENUINELY admire from my sister is that she does not put up with all the crap he pulls (altho... i also dont understand why they just haven’t broken up yet like when will she SNAP). but yeah, she immediately jumps into his defense and i just think that it’s shitty. she knows he’s being unnecessarily rude and that she knows better. we confirm that multiple times. and then she immediately goes “oh but no he isn’t commanding he’s just- he doesn’t know better”

... babe

also since this guys is so unnecessarily obsessive about my sister’s behaviour and he continuously criticises her for little things she likes, i also just cant fucking stand him having the sheer audacity to act controlling and commanding over this. but he’s also a fucking cunt so i couldve seen it coming so me being surprised is on me i guess

basically i felt my braincells diE  every time my sister talked about how bad he is at his job and AGAIN it’s a skill that you can learn and i can imagine that he just never was in that environment before but just the lack of motivation to even try to learn is YIKES to me, especially since my sister is the most driven person ever. she works hard for things she wants. she flaunts her knowledge. i mean do i think she’s stupid for taking him back in the first place, yeah, but apart from that i cannot emphasise how competent she is

but this relationship just also brings out the worst in my sister and the gap in competence makes it worse and worse

WHICH LEADS TO PART 2

his sorry ass hasn’t finished high school after failing several times and AGAIN that does not make a person less valuable (academic pretention is yikes), but he doesn’t even try and basically me and the fam believe he is straight up lying now cause he was supposed to hear if he has finally graduated around a month ago

my sis: “oh, he said he hasn’t gotten results yet”

us: “.... you know that all high schools are closed since the year has ended and that summer vacation started 1 week ago and that the test happened more than a month ago”

my sis: “YEAH but there’s less strictness and more extensions due to corona”

me: “yeah true but i just did a 5 second google search and even the extended deadline is over”

fam: “has he at least applied for further education??”

sis: “well no but he says he still has time”

me: “YEAH and ANOTHER 5 second google search showed that that extended deadline ended 2.5 months ago”

AND AGAIN your scholary achievements do not make you any less value bla bla bla, but he had A WHOLE DAMN YEAR to do one subject and even my sister said that it’s super easy and she doesnt get why he hasn’t passed it, but he just did nothing and he knows that my sister finds it very important that he can at least do something cause again she’s super driven and it makes her feel bad of her achievements

which is a RED FLAG. you know, women having to tone down their achievements in order to not outshine men’s fragility cause they don’t want a woman to be better than them

but i think she just realised that he’d been lying and yeah we all felt kinda bad for her, cause she doesn’t deserve that. she left and me and my parents just looked at each other like “would he lie about something so big?”

all of us collectively: “YEAH”

... i mean, he lied about cheating

i just for once want him to stop lying with his hypocritical ass. this bitch lies all the damn time but the moment he finds out my sister called a boy a year ago before they were dating, he needs to hear EVERYTHING (lol about that one time he tried to expose my sister for talking to a guy regularly even before they were dating.... it was our cousin Bobbie). so yeah he needs to know everything or he gets super weird but he can lie about shit like this (and cheating cause truly i wont be surprised if he’s done it again tbh)

and ugh this is a messy reply but just.... 

I FIND HIM SO STUPID FOR THIS and i feel so bad for my sister cause i can imagine that it’s not nice for her to hear all of this either, but FACE IT, this dude hasn’t tried to do shit for a year and now he’s lying and it just makes me so damn mad and she needs to hear it

i feel like this isn’t even the worst thing he’s done cause not knowing how to wait tables does not make you a bad human being, but this relationship is so incredibly unhealthy and toxic that ive reached a point that i am even worried for his well-being (and i FUCKING HATE HIS GUTS). this relation makes both of them so vile and it shows their worst and toxic sides, and i know my sister only does it to show him how unhealthy his behaviour is, but come on COME ON one day she’s gonna snap/

so these things just make it all worse for them in the bigger picture and either he gotta clear up his act or they just gotta break the fuck up

since i have no hope in the first possibility, im gonna join my grandma in praying for the second one

and that’s why we’re all like >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

[sonicrayguns]

i started doing a thread abt my current state of mental health on twitter but twitter fucking sucks so im just gonna put it here and then keep going thanks

in 2018 im gonna stop making "i wanna die" jokes because in 2017 i've been working a lot on self-improvement and happiness and it's just not compatible with my whole sense of humor being hinged on. wanting to die

i'm tweeting this literal seconds after making another "i wanna die" joke btw

But Like it's complicated because humor as a coping mechanism is real and good and has been very helpful it declaws the issue and puts it on the table in a casual way so it's not this like super horrifying thing you can never talk about But

on the flip side of that i now cannot process anything in my life without making it a joke i just tonight had a minor freakout about forgetting a big homework thing and then was like "ha ha sorry abt that" and when someone was very genuinely like "don't be its ok to be stressed" i was like ???

like ??? no i was kidding hahaha but i Wasn't because i was actually very startled for a min but i just like couldn't process that or the idea that someone would be giving me genuine advice bcause of that like i have built up this Wall of humor and now nothing gets thru to me

even like big upsetting major things either in the news or irl don’t affect me it’s like if i can’t do a joke about it i just block it out which isn’t!! good!!! 

the other thing is that that kind of humor is just very off-putting to like uh normal people but also when it’s to this extent to other people with mental illness it’s enforcing a toxic attitude and like normalizing that? i jst found a whole twitter for someone to post about how much they want to die every day (like literally, every day) but worded like jokes and with hundreds of likes/RTs from people relating to that and also enforcing that attitude and that’s! not! healthy! at! fucking! all!

i’m not saying you should internalize that shit for other people’s comfort like absolutely not but like we have to start taking that shit seriously.

i don’t know i keep losing track of things as i’m saying them so this is a weird post but like. your mindset. and like the way you frame things is really really important to mental health and worldview and so making these jokes all the time has made “i want to die” just a normal part of my vocabulary and something i blurt out at the slightest inconvenience and so it normalizes like Actually wanting to die at The Slightest Inconvenience without actually dealing with it the easy way

part of the reason for that is when i started doing it i was in a really toxic friendship (freshman year of high school babey!!!) w a dude who did it all the time and so that like environment made it totally normal for me to also do it under the impression that it was a good coping mechanism and don’t even get me wrong because it did help, like i said it declaws the issue and makes it less fucking terrifying which it absolutely is especially when you’re like 14

except that even after realizing that this friendship and the subsequent environment was super toxic and bad i just like kept. doing it? and this dude also btw reintroduced a bunch of slurs into my mental vocabulary even though i absolutely know not to Actually Say Them which is fucking!! great!!! anyway so now i keep. doing that and doing these jokes and it’s not healthy anymore. it’s not helping anymore

so i’m not saying like “this thing is Problematic Now and if you do it you’re Terrible” like not at fucking all it is such a complex issue that i’m hesitant to even post about on a public platform but i have like 5 followers anyway so it doesnt matter But Anyway 

i guess i’m just saying in the right context humor to cope is good and valid but if you do it to such an extent that you can’t process any emotions anymore it’s more harm than good and so i’m trying. to stop

the other thing is people with mental illness especially severe depression you’re like “whats the point in healing/improving/getting help i just want to be Depressed” and so you become extremely resistant to stopping any unhealthy behavior which in a more severe context ends up being like drugs and self harm and that attitude is also how things like that aforementioned twitter account happen because you Know you’re hurting yourself and cannot Stop

and i

don’t want to be in that mindset anymore?

like i’m going to improve myself i’m going to stop reinforcing my own depression and learn to handle things normally

i’m making friends at school and i talked to BOTH the women at the DMV the other day without stuttering or blanking AND a few weeks ago i emailed a college counselor to resolve an issue which that also just reminded me to email my invoices to my boss fuck Anyway

ACTUALLY thats also an improvement i have a job working with the two loveliest teachers in the world and i’m helping teach kids how to use photoshop and pretending that i also know how to use photoshop LMAO 

i’m gonna stop saying rude shit all the time i am not only going to be nice i am going to be absolutely fucking radiant with the amount of optimism and positivity i exude and that is fucking that THANKS