#the last one is something self-indulgent that i started so long ago but i kinda wanna finish it because it's IMPORTANT | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

xxsabitoxx · 8 months

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Pale Blue [Part One]

Geto Suguru x AFAB Pregnant Reader

READ PART TWO HERE

Warnings: THIS FIC IS CANON COMPLIANT, if you are not caught up on Jujutsu Kaisen's manga, or at the very least if you have not seen "gojo's past" you WILL be spoiled. This story contains darker themes, heavier topics, pregnancy and all the lovely details of it, and lastly explicit sexual content. Read at your own risk!

A/N: Here it is!! Part One!! This fic is super self indulgent for me and I'm very excited for y'all to read it. The idea literally came to me in a dream like a month ago and I woke up and immediately started writing. It's been a long ass time since I've written a plot heavy fic, and it's been well over a year since I've actively planned a multiple part story and gone through with it. So, this fic is kinda like... my baby lol.

Word Count: 19k | Playlist

September 2007

Your mouth felt like chalk, hands trembling ever so slightly as you set the small wand on the countertop in your bathroom. You couldn't think straight, but that unfortunately wasn’t anything new, it had been that way for the last three weeks. Ever since he left, you had felt like your head was stuck in a fishbowl. People eyeing you with pity at the world you had been dropped into, their whispers muffled into incoherent nonsense as you walked by. Satoru was no better off, but he could at least tug his emotions off of his sleeves and place them in his heart where nobody could see them, except for you. At least you would be able to see them if he didn’t shut you out.

Not that you had been any kinder, you had withdrawn too.

The only one who seemed alright was Shoko, her reaction to Suguru’s deflection was nothing out of character. Not many things could shock her to her core, even something as absurd as what Suguru had done couldn’t wipe the gentle smile from her face when she saw him again. You envied her for that level of composure. You envied her for getting to see him again, just as you envied Satoru. For some reason, the man evaded you as if you were the plague. Or perhaps it looked like you were merely chasing after a ghost, a figment of your imagination. You kind of wished that it was true, that Geto Suguru had been someone you conjured up in your mind.

But he wasn’t, he was a real, breathing human who had taken over one hundred lives…. Including his parents. The thought made your mouth taste like metal, everytime you zoned out too long and thought too hard, you’d bite your inner cheek until it bled. Three weeks later you still felt like you were moving on autopilot, the only thing that could pull you out of it would be his gentle embrace. You blinked a bit, the metallic taste coating your tongue as you unclench your jaw and look in the mirror. You hardly recognize yourself, for a moment you think you look just like him, and it's enough to steal the little air you had in your lungs.

You had never thought you'd experience a heartbreak as severe as this one, and you especially didn’t think it would be dealt to you by Suguru. Though you saw all of the signs, the hundreds if not thousands he put out and never let you touch. No, his cries for help were always directed at Satoru. The white haired man never seemed to catch them, and if he did, he never said a thing. Suguru had refused to acknowledge his issues when he was with you, no matter how many times you tried to sit him down and get it out. He’d change the subject and move on.

He’d sweet-talk you, making you forget why you had been so concerned in the first place because there, for a fleeting moment, was the boy you had fallen in love with two years prior. He’d fill your mind with nothing but good things, pretty noises, good feelings. Not stopping until his name was all you could utter, not stopping until you fell asleep in his arms, content and sedated. He was a master at avoidance, trying so hard to keep things perfect just for you. You were beginning to hate him for it, but even the idea of hating him made bile burn your throat.

You were left in emotional turmoil, love mixing with hate mixing with rage and depression. No matter how many times the word hate flashed through your mind, it was never truly directed at Suguru. Rather the jujutsu world, the things they had forced upon him, the pressure he had been made to feel. You especially felt that bubbling hate for a certain man by the name of Fushiguro Toji, who caused this whole spiral. He was long gone now, Satoru had effectively put the man down and he would not be getting back up. Though it killed you to no end that he got the easy way out. You almost wished that Satoru had kept the man alive.

You couldn’t stomach it as your back pressed into the cold wall of your bathroom, arms folded over your chest as you stared at nothing in particular. Eyes refusing to focus on anything of importance but making a point to avoid the developing test on the counter.

Suguru had left you a note, shortly after his final conversation with Satoru. You had returned to your dorm to see it on your bed and you recognized his handwriting before you even read your name on the envelope. You could still feel your hands trembling as you ripped the paper, flinching as it cut your skin, crumbling as tears dripped down your cheeks. You read it three times before finally comprehending the words, the paper littered with tear drops and your blood. Every word was written with care, you could hear his voice as your eyes passed over each sentence, see his face before you as if he was speaking.

It was an apology, his resolve and a goodbye all in one. Leaving you more empty than you had felt before. Still, it sat on your nightstand, you couldn’t throw it away. As if his sweaters weren’t still hanging in your closet, like the blanket he got you wasn’t still sitting on your bed. You held onto that letter like it was the last thing you had of him. Mourning him as if he had died, like he wasn’t still alive and breathing and walking around within the very city you were in now. You almost thought it would be easier if he had died. At least you’d feel some sort of closure, knowing he’s not coming back. But this, this was a form of torture for you.

To know that you could bump into him at a restaurant, or even pass him on a busy street. He wasn’t gone, if anything he was doing better than he ever was. Leaving you, Satoru, Shoko, and everyone else behind to pick up the shattered pieces. Still, you couldn’t hate him for that. No amount of anger would mend the torn pieces of your broken heart. You were fairly certain nothing would, the only cure was the one man you could no longer call your own. You’d spend the rest of your life with your heart ripped wide, an empty void filling the space.

You inhaled deeply, pushing off the bathroom wall and taking a hesitant step towards the counter. The test was upside down, you couldn’t see the small little window that would show you the results, for a moment you wanted to pick it up and throw it in the trash without even looking. There was nothing stopping you from doing so either, but you held back anyways. The only reason you were taking a pregnancy test in the first place was because your period was two weeks late. You could easily chalk it up to stress, but at the same time you knew all too well that you and Suguru often went without protection. Idiot.

Somehow, despite his inner battles, Suguru’s sex drive never slowed down. Maybe it was the craving for physical touch or maybe sex was a great way for him to forget about his issues for a while. Regardless, you had always been eager to oblige, even if it meant falling into his traps and luring your attention away from the real issue at hand. You had no idea how long it had been and if the damn thing was positive you were sure it would show up by now. So you picked it up and flipped it over in your hand, tired eyes scanning it. Your forehead creased for a moment, eyes squinting in frustration because you couldn’t tell if there was a second line or not.

If it’s positive, it's too early to tell. Your grip tightens around the small plastic test, anger flooding your heart as you chuck it in the trash can with such force it rattles as it hits the wall. Once again you are left with uncertainty. It seemed nobody could give you a straight answer anymore. Truth be told, you weren’t sure what you wanted that test to say. The thought of being pregnant with his child would have elated you two months ago. Now the thought made your insides twist and turn, for a moment you thought you were going to puke again. At the very same time, the idea of the test being negative felt like a rug being pulled out from under you.

As if you didn’t know that feeling well enough.

In a twisted way, you thought that being pregnant would bring him back to you. As if it would erase every heinous crime he had committed and bring the man you loved back into your arms. You were foolish, but not foolish enough to really believe in those daydreams. You hauled yourself out of your bathroom and back into your dorm room, falling into your disheveled bed with a soft thump. His t-shirt was hanging loosely on your body, it still smells faintly of him. It’s the only shirt of his that you’d been wearing, too afraid to lose his scent on the others.

It was still early enough for you to sleep for a few more hours before Shoko was knocking on your door and hauling you into the world. You hated it, but she assured you that you’d thank her for it in a couple months. You doubted it, and for some reason you felt like she did too.

Your sleep was dreamless, it had been since Suguru left you. You weren’t quite sure if you were thankful for that or not. Suguru was still the last thing you thought about before falling asleep and the first thing you thought of when you woke up. His absence consumed your every thought, impossible to ignore, unable to forget. There had been a few tough nights where you dragged yourself down the hall towards Satoru’s room. The man was usually still up, sitting on his bed with a book in hand that you could tell he wasn’t reading. Just an attempt at distraction.

He welcomes you without a word, scooting over a bit so you could sit beside him, head on his shoulder as he tosses the book to the floor. You remain like that until you fall asleep, no words spoken but nothing needed to be verbalized to understand you were both mourning the loss of a man who wasn’t even dead. In an odd way, you felt as if you were mourning Satoru as well. His smile, his jokes, the way his eyes seemed to sparkle, all of those things had dwindled. To his credit, he was managing to pull himself back together, at least better than you had been.

A harsh knock at your door signaled that Shoko was there. You hadn’t even realized that you fell asleep, but you felt even more groggy than you had a couple hours prior. “I’m up.” It’s hoarse and unconvincing but you hear Shoko utter a small “ok”. You know she’s still there, she always waits for you to get dressed and emerge from your room yourself. If you make her wait any longer than fifteen minutes she's usually barging in herself to pull you from your bed. Your body aches as you sit up, stumbling across the room to the bathroom because you need to pee yet again.

The air almost feels stale as you get your routine done in the bathroom, the test is still sitting in the small can beside your sink. It’s presence is heavy, to the point you question if you should take it out with you despite only having a couple tissues accompanying it. You decided against it when she knocked again. “Just getting dressed.” You mumbled softly, listening for her small “Hmph.” At least letting you know she heard you. Your uniform still felt foreign on your skin, it had for the last three weeks but you tried to ignore it. “About time.” Shoko smiled as you emerged, Satoru beside her. “Oh? You’re both here?” Your tone was questioning but not mad.

“Yeah, Yaga said we should take the day to be normal or something like that.” Satoru drawled, circular glasses sliding down his nose as he rolled his eyes. “Us? Normal?” You snorted, pulling your door shut as Shoko began walking down the hallway. “He just doesn’t know what to do with us at the moment.” Satoru offered in a low tone, Shoko would scold him for speaking like that, especially to you. The thing is, he wasn’t saying anything that you hadn’t already thought of yourself. “I don’t know what to do with us either.” You could assume Yaga was being vigilant, the guilt of not seeing what was happening with Suguru was weighing on him too.

The flick of Shoko’s lighter was heard as you stepped into the morning air, laughter bubbling in your chest as you looked at her. “It was killing you, wasn’t it.” Yaga had been cracking down on her bad habit, trying to limit her by saying no smoking in the dorms. “Just a little.” She teased back, inhaling deeply before blowing the gray smoke past her lips. “Shoko, gimme one.” Your eyebrow cocked as Satoru stuck his hand out. Her eyes met you for a moment before begrudgingly handing the lighter and pack to him. “New habit?” You commented softly, watching as he stuck a cylinder between his lips and held his hand up to block the flame from the wind.

Satoru shrugged, inhaling a bit before blowing out, moving to hand the pack to you. You hesitated, the test in your dorm trash can still lingering in the back of your mind. “I’m good.” You took them anyway, handing them to Shoko. Neither of them said anything but they shared a knowing glance, they couldn’t be mad at you for trying to quit a bad habit. “So where are we going?” You didn’t like the prolonged silence as the two of them puffed away. “I didn’t think you’d want to go anywhere, but if you want we can go get breakfast.” Shoko’s eyes flickered over both you and Satoru, as if she was looking at two temperamental children.

“Breakfast sounds good.” Satoru offered, shoving one hand in his pocket while the other plucked the cig from his lips. “It does.” You added softly, stomach turning at the very thought of food but you couldn’t let them know that. You had lost your appetite shortly after he left, but you still forced yourself to eat at least one substantial meal a day. The nausea that had settled in your gut most days usually deterred you from anything else but plain rice and maybe some soup. Still, it was food and the only thing you could keep down at that. “Alright, I’ll call for a driver and we can go get something to eat.” Shoko pulled out her phone, clicking on a number she saved.

“You’ve been eating, right?” You jumped a little, eyes sliding over to Satoru. His tone was low, just low enough for only you to hear. “Yeah, I’ve been eating… you?” He looked the same, tall and lean with broad shoulders. Satoru nodded, pushing his glasses up to sit on the bridge of his nose. “The car will be at the gates for us in five minutes so let's get going.” Shoko started walking, like always you and Satoru followed behind her like ducklings. Satoru’s question still lingered in your mind, his ability to read your thoughts nearly rivaled Suguru.

You had to wonder just how much those six eyes of his could see.

The three of you clamored into the car, Satoru taking the passenger seat while you and Shoko took the back. You had no idea where you were going, not even when Shoko gave an address to the driver. It was somewhere in the city, you knew that much, but you trusted her judgment and prayed they would have something plain for your stomach. None of you spoke as the car barreled forward, your eyes glued to the surroundings zipping past you, as if you’d catch him walking down the street on a busy morning. You knew you’d always be looking for him, everywhere you went, your eyes would search for him.

You tore your eyes from the window, glancing at Satoru in the passenger seat. You couldn’t see his eyes, but his head was turned towards the window. If you had to guess, he was doing the very same thing. Looking for someone who would never appear. Unless you were Shoko of course, you still felt your throat tighten at the thought. You knew Suguru had chosen to reveal himself to her for a couple reasons. One being that she wasn’t nearly strong enough to take him down single handedly. The other being her easy going nature, he knew there would be little to no conflict or questions to answer with her. If roles were reversed, you’d do the same.

“Hello?” You blinked, looking at Shoko with parted lips. “You okay?” her head tilted, brown eyes lingering over your features. “I… yeah.” You swallowed, the car was still moving so you didn’t space out for that long. “What are you in the mood to eat?” She repeated the question she had asked seconds prior while you were clearly on another plane of existence. “Something plain.” You offered lamely, hands clasping together in your lap. “Plain?” Satoru questioned, eyes shifting to look at you through the rearview mirror. “My stomach has been sensitive. Plain foods are all I can really get down right now.” You shrunk into the seat.

Shoko hummed, eyes observing you intently now. You could almost hear her silently listing all of your physical symptoms, noting in her head the various things that could cause them. Most could be answered with heartbreak, but that didn’t typically make you sensitive to certain foods. Shoko and Satoru knew of Suguru's relationship with you. They knew you were serious about each other, that you often slept in the other’s dorm depending on the day. They knew you went on dates and bought each other gifts. They knew you had long since confessed your love to one another and were not strangers to holding hands when you thought nobody was looking.

It didn’t take a genius to figure out that the two of you slept together as well.

“Quiet.” You sunk your teeth into the side of your cheek, struggling to stifle your noises as Suguru’s fingers curled inside of your tight heat. “You don’t want them to hear us, right?” he cooed again, lips ghosting the shell of your ear as he pressed you harder into the empty desk, nearly pushing it into the wall of the classroom with the ferocity of his hunger.

You shook your head, not trusting your voice in that moment to make any coherent sounds. Your nails dug into his bicep, legs splayed hazardously over the sides of the desk as you used your free hand to brace yourself. Two fingers continued to plunge in and out of you, curling perfectly and sucking the air from your lungs as he found that one particular spot.

Suguru watched in fascination, dark eyes glazed over as they flickered between his hand and your face. Each draw back revealed the slick shine of your arousal on his digits, each push forward was accompanied by a squelch. It made his throat tight, arousal making him feel hot all over as he continued to fuck you with his fingers.

“Sugu…” You choked, face warming considerably as you realized how desperate you sounded. “Hmm?” a gentle hum, his fingers burying deep and massaging your walls until your thighs twitched. “I need you.” Your head fell back, hand leaving his bicep to slap over your mouth in an attempt to silence the cry that left you. “You…need me?”

Those words were jarring to him, as if a chain of firecrackers had been ignited under his skin. You nodded, helpless and at his mercy as you prayed Satoru and Shoko wouldn’t wander off to figure out where the two of you had gone. You couldn’t quite comprehend what happened next, the sudden retreat of his fingers left you feeling empty, clearing your foggy mind for a second.

They were quickly replaced with something else, something wet and soft. Your eyes widened considerably when you looked down to see Suguru on his knees, hands gripping the plush of your thighs with his face buried between. He would have given you more if it weren't for his damn pants, he was too impatient to struggle with the high waisted fashion choices he made.

You couldn’t think again, mind immediately fogging over as you focused solely on Suguru’s head between your legs. The flat of his tongue licking up your folds before delving further, bumping your clit with his nose and earning a strangled noise from you. You bit down on your fist now, not hard enough to draw blood but enough to silence yourself for a bit.

Suguru didn’t mind, if anything he wanted them to hear you. He wanted to see the shocked look on Satoru’s face when he realized what was happening. He couldn’t lie, this whole rendezvous had started because of an offhand comment Satoru made. One about how he was likely better at pleasing women than Suguru. You knew that's why you were in here too, you felt like you needed to thank Satoru for pushing Suguru to this point, whether that was his intention or not.

Heat continued to build in your gut, if you could trust yourself to stay balanced you would have let go of the desk and buried your hand in his hair. You wanted to tug the silky black locks from the confines of the bun he always kept them in, watch them cascade around his handsome face and turn messy because of your fingers. Then again, that may make it a little too obvious to your two awaiting friends. “Sugu…”

You gasped, hand flying from your mouth to grab the desk as you nearly lost your balance. Suguru had started to stand, knocking you back as his arms wrapped around your lower half in a bear hug. Suguru was standing at his full height now, your knees bent over his shoulders while only your mid-back and shoulders pressed into the desk. You could have melted into a puddle the moment his eyes met yours, his mouth still pressed firmly to your cunt.

“Suguru…” You choked again, hands moving to grip the sides of the desk for some kind of grounding. You could feel him smirk, eyes burning into yours as his tongue lavished you. It was all too much, too lewd, too risky. Your orgasm was building faster than you anticipated, the tingling arousal shooting down your spine and making your legs tense as he teased you. You came with a choked cry of his name, eyes squeezing shut as you rode out your orgasm.

“We’re here.” You blinked, eyes scanning your surroundings as Satoru got out of the car. “Are you sure you’re okay? We can get the food to go and head back to campus.” Shoko’s words were out of concern but her tone was still relaxed. “I’m alright, I could use some time in a busy space.” You lied, the quiet of your dorm room had never sounded so inviting. “Thank you.” You muttered softly to the driver, his small smile told you he was well aware of what was going on. Satoru was already by the front door of the cafe, putting out the butt of his cigarette on a nearby trash can before dropping it in. Shoko did the same, following after you as you entered.

Satoru’s looks tended to come in handy, his glasses sliding down his nose to show the startling blue of his eyes was all that was needed to get the three of you a seat and bypass the wait. “At least you’re good for something.” You teased him, watching him roll his eyes before smiling. “It’s my duty to get the two of you quick service and good food, even if I have to whore myself out.” For some reason, that had laughter bubbling in your chest, the genuine kind. “Such a noble sacrifice.” You laughed, the menu in your hand shaking as your shoulders bounced. You were too distracted to see the way Satoru’s shoulders seemed to sag in relief as he watched you, for a moment it was like nothing had changed.

If it weren't for the gaping, empty space in the booth beside him, he would have been convinced.

“What are you going to get, Shoko?” She was the only one actively looking over the menu. “I’m not sure yet, but they do have some options that would be easy on your stomach.” You weren’t sure why but it made your heart ache just a bit, she had been more concerned over your meal than her own. At the very same time, it made you feel small, like you were a bit of a nuisance for having stomach issues… or whatever they were… in the first place. “Oh, alright.” You focused on the menu, aware of their eyes on you as you tried to find something small but appealing. You settled on tamagoyaki and asked for it to be made on the salty side rather than sweet.

Shoko went for a traditional meal as well while Satoru ventured into their “western” cuisine. His choice sounded so sweet that the thought of it made your teeth hurt. “I don’t know how you do it, Satoru.” you sipped your tea slowly, letting the hot liquid slide down your throat and settle in your stomach. He only shrugged, smiling softly “I’ve yet to find something too sweet for me to handle.” Normally he would have added something flirty but he decided against it. Despite knowing you and Suguru were a couple, it never stopped Satoru’s flirtatious comments. It only bothered Suguru a little bit but he knew his best friend would never cross that kind of line.

“You may go into cardiac arrest before you meet your match, Satoru.” Shoko snorted, sipping her coffee as she took in the surroundings of the busy cafe. For a moment, you wondered if she was doing what you and Satoru had been subconsciously doing for the last three weeks. “I keep waiting for him to appear.” Your tone was just barely above a whisper, as if even bringing up his existence would cause the world to implode around you. “Me too.” Shoko spoke softly, eyes still looking anywhere but the two of you. Satoru kept quiet, face unusually somber as he sipped his coffee. “I think I’ll eventually go insane.”

You tried to sound lighthearted but the crack in your voice gave the opposite effect.

Satoru’s eyes flickered up at that, making your shoulders shrink into the booth. You had quickly come to learn that both of your friends were treating you like fragile porcelain. Though you partially felt the same when talking to them, especially Satoru. Despite the frequent and long nights with each other, little to no words were ever spoken. “I’m fine.” You tried, voice a little stronger than before. “We can talk about these things without falling apart.” It sounded like you were trying to convince yourself more than them. Before anyone could speak, the waiter was walking over with your food, effectively stopping any further discussion.

“Satoru…” You choked as the waiter walked away, eyes focused on the sugary, gooey concoction on the plate before him. “That’s your ticket to the ER.” Shoko was gawking at it too, a bite of food already halfway to her mouth. Satoru, on the other hand, looked like a kid on christmas morning, glasses sliding down his nose with a smile on his face. Your stomach grumbled as he cut into the pancakes, the feeling making you jump just a bit. You actually felt hungry, mouth watering as you looked down at your own plate and moved to take a bite.

Silence fell over the table as you all ate, within minutes half of your food was gone and you were quietly wishing you had ordered something a little bigger.

“You need a napkin.” You laughed softly, handing Satoru your spare napkin so he could wipe the syrup off of his cheek. “Thanks.” For some reason you couldn't help but think he looked like a little kid. For another reason you couldn’t quite explain, it made sadness sink into your shoulders. He should be here with the three of you, eating and laughing and bringing you the comfort you always looked for in him. Your hands shook as you moved to eat more, not willing to let the surge of emotion get rid of the appetite you rarely had nowadays.

As you finished your plate, you felt the bubbling wave of nausea build in your stomach. You inhaled slowly, trying to find a way to ease your worries and keep your food down. “Are you okay? You look a little green.” Shoko eyed you with concern, not even a second later Satoru was signaling the waiter for the check. “Y-yeah… told you my stomach was sensitive. That’s the most I've eaten at once in the last three weeks.” You couldn’t stand the embarrassment of making a scene or wasting money on the food you had just consumed. “I’ll be back.” You slipped out of the booth, your friend’s concerned eyes zeroing in on you as you disappeared for the bathroom.

Luckily for you the bathroom was empty, the fluorescent lights making you flinch as you stumbled to the sink and turned the water on cold. You leaned over it, hands and wrists submerged under the running stream, chest heaving with the effort to remain calm. You were desperate to keep the food down, so desperate you could feel sweat forming on your temple as you tried to focus on anything but the nausea. Suguru’s face flashed through your mind and for a moment you were convinced your knees would give out from under you.

“I told you to take it easy.” He huffs softly, fingers running through your hair as he rakes it away from your face. Carefully, he’s looping one of his elastics around your hair to keep it in place. Your head is still buried in the toilet, you had just finished throwing up for the third time in the last hour. “Are you still with me?” His hand is on your back now, rubbing slow but deliberate circles. Feebly you give him a thumbs up, throat burning from the sting of alcohol coming back up.

“You didn’t eat much today and then you went and got shit-faced with Shoko.” Suguru stated the obvious, trying not to scold you because he knew you weren’t doing good right now. “I don’t think you have anything else to puke up, do you want some water?” You lifted your head now, reaching for toilet paper to wipe your mouth. “Water sounds good.” Your voice was weaker than Suguru had expected it to sound, his heart aching a bit as he sat beside you on the bathroom floor.

“I’ll be right back, okay? Just yell if you get scared and I’ll be by your side before you know it.” You nodded, thanking him softly as he got up and disappeared out of your bathroom. You were only seventeen at the time, acting far older than you were and thinking you could get away with it. Now, you are facing the consequences of being naive. Typical for someone your age. Suguru had returned in under two minutes, handing you a glass of room temperature water. “It’ll be easier on your stomach at this temperature.” He chuckled as you grimaced.

He moved to grab a washcloth from your cabinet, turning the sink water on cold. “And this…” he wrung it out twice before turning off the water “will help focus your attention on something other than the nausea.” He placed the cloth on the back of your neck, watching your shoulders sag in relief as something finally cooled your clammy skin. “Thanks, Sugu.”

“Sugu… I’m scared.” Your voice was barely audible, tears burning your eyes as you squeezed them shut. Somehow it was working, your pain outshining the nausea as you tried to stop yourself from sobbing in the middle of the restroom. A year had passed since that moment in time, you were only eighteen now and yet you felt as if you had grown a decade. Yet, you were reduced to a scared and crying child because of nausea. Get it together. You forced yourself to straighten, hands slightly numb under the current of cold water.

You forced yourself to make eye contact with your reflection, observing how stark the dark circles were under your eyes. Shoko had been right, you did look a bit green, but it was fading steadily as everything subsided. You let your hands sit under the water for a minute longer before bending over the sink and splashing some on your face. The door to the restroom opened as you straightened again, Shoko was looking at you with worry. “Did you get sick?” you shook your head, turning the water off and reaching for the paper towels.

“Managed to fight it off… for now.”

“Satoru paid already, there is a convenient store a couple shops down. We can get you some nausea meds and a barf bag for the ride back… just in case.” You nodded, smiling a bit. “That would probably be a good idea.” you followed her out of the bathroom and through the restaurant, Satoru was standing on the sidewalk with a new cigarette between his lips. “Damn, you really did develop a new habit.” He only shrugged, inhaling deeply before blowing more out. “I’ll get over it at some point.” Knowing him and his will-power, he probably would.

“I’ll call for the driver, Satoru take her to the convenient store and I’ll catch up.” Satoru nodded, saluting her with a quick “yes ma’am” before grabbing your hand and dragging you along. You didn’t speak until Shoko was out of earshot. “Do you think it’s going to get better?” You appreciated the weight of his hand in yours, though you were certain he could feel how clammy it was. “I think it’ll get more bearable with time.” not better, but tolerable. The thought had your chest feeling heavy as you stepped inside of the small store.

“Nausea meds and barf bags.” Satoru chuckled, reading the signs above each aisle until he spotted one that seemed like a good start. “You’ll have to see a doctor if this doesn’t ease up… how long has it been going on anyways?” You shuffled behind him, arms crossing due to him letting them go a moment prior. “Shortly after he left, after I found the letter.” Only Satoru knew about the letter that had been left behind. How Suguru managed to get back onto campus and leave it in your dorm was beyond him. You had even let him read it, breaking his heart again.

“Shoko!” Satoru called, noticing her walk down the aisle before you could even turn your head. “I’m not good with this stuff, what should we get?” Satoru had already grabbed a box of blue cylindrical barf bags for you but the actual meds were basically foreign to him. “I’ll handle it from here, Satoru. You can wait in the car, he should be upfront by now.” Satoru’s brows furrowed, so did yours, but the look in Shoko’s eyes had him shrugging and handing the box to you. “Alright then, I’ll see ya out there.”

He whistled as he strolled by, your eyes narrowing on Shoko. “What’s this about?” you watched her shuffle through the shelves, picking up one and reading the box before setting it down and moving onto the next. “I don’t know what you mean.” She commented offhandedly, plucking another box and reading it before sighing. “This one should work.” She turned, handing it to you while motioning you to follow her down the aisle. You read it over, nothing out of the ordinary so you truly couldn’t figure out what made this one different from the others.

You stopped short when Shoko did, eyes scanning the aisle and feeling your stomach drop. “Shoko–” You sighed, she was standing in front of the pregnancy tests. “Listen, I know it’s probably the last thing you want to even think about but I think you should take one.” She was grabbing a box of the cheap tests, the same test that was still residing in the trash can of your bathroom. “Shoko, it's not necessary.” You couldn't bring yourself to tell her you already took one, for some reason you couldn’t tell her it was negative either.

“I’ll buy them, and you’ll keep them. If this nausea doesn’t subside in like two weeks, I’m forcing you to take them.” You felt your face burning, clutching the nausea meds tightly in your hands as you looked away from her. “Fine.” You sighed, head tilted at her shoes as you followed her up front to the register. Everything was placed neatly in a brown bag so nobody could see the contents. Once in the car, you popped open the barf bags just to keep one ready in the event your nausea returned full force. “I figured you would forget this.”

You looked up to see Satoru handing you a bottle of water, your lips parting in surprise. “You know me well, Satoru. I did forget.” you took it from him, grabbing the box of nausea meds and ripping them open. You took them and sighed, gulping down water when you realized how thirsty you had been. “If we have nothing else to do today, I think I’ll take a nap.” You were aching for your bed, more tired now than you had been after any missions. “Alright but we’ll wake you up for dinner if we don’t hear from you.” Shoko smiled, cracking the window to light a cig.

“It’s not even 11am yet.” you snorted. “Yeah but you can sleep like the dead when you really need it, if we don’t wake you, you’ll sleep straight through till tomorrow.” You opened your mouth to deny it, about to use your frequent bathroom breaks as an excuse but stopped yourself. Saying that would only confirm the very thing Shoko was suspicious of. “Alright, fine, whatever.” You resigned with a playful huff, arms crossing as you turned to look out the window. Luckily for you, you managed to make it through the ride without needing to use the bag.

“I’ll see you later.” You called after them, waving as you headed for the dorms. They both waved back, finding shade under a tree to enjoy more of the sunny morning. You felt your shoulders sagging with each step, your social battery diminished far faster now that Suguru wasn’t always by your side. You had almost grown a bit too dependent on him, thinking he would be a constant in your life. You inhaled shakily, the brown bag crumbling between your fingers as your emotions bubbled to the surface yet again. You couldn't seem to get yourself to your dorm fast enough, hot tears slipping down your cheeks as you shoved the key in the lock.

It came in heavy waves, making you feel weak as you could only succumb to the sadness festering in your chest. You dropped the bag by the door, kicking off your shoes and shouldering off your uniform jacket. Moving on autopilot, you drew your curtains shut and took off the rest of your clothing, sliding his shirt over your head until you were enveloped in his scent. You were gasping for air by the time your body hit the mattress, curling in on yourself as you sobbed. “I miss you.” You hiccuped, rubbing your eyes as if it would stop the tears.

God dammit, Suguru, why did you have to do this?

You buried your head in your pillow, trying to drown out your own feelings before sadness turned to anger and you ripped your whole room apart because of it.

“Stop wiggling so much.” His voice sounded like gravel, rumbling the back of your head as he spoke. “Can’t help it.” You retorted, trying your best to settle into a comfortable position. Suguru had you wrapped in a bear hug, his favorite form of affection, especially since he knew you couldn’t get out of his grasp. His arms were covered in thick muscles, something you initially didn't expect because his uniform and choice of baggy clothing typically hid them.

You could use all your strength and his grip wouldn’t falter.

“Why not?” he mumbled again, if you had to guess, his eyes were closed as he spoke. “Cause it’s warm, Sugu.” you were both laying on top of the covers, little to no clothing on because of the heat and the broken air conditioning that the school was still trying to fix. Nothing but an old fan swiveling side to side to create some sort of relief. Still, Suguru couldn’t sleep unless you were pressed flush to him, warm or not. “It’s not that bad.”

“Oh it absolutely is.” you immediately countered, turning your head back to try and look at him. “It could be way worse.” he tried again, fingers thrumming against your side. “Yeah, it could, but it could also be better. Like if you let me go for example.” You wiggled a bit, trying to create space before he pulled you tightly to him again. “Nice try, it’s not happening.” You groaned, going limp in his arms as he began to laugh. “I could totally make it worse for you.” He added softly, lips ghosting your ear. Despite the heat, you shivered.

“The weirdest things turn you on, Sugu.”

“Hey, it’s not nice to call yourself weird.”

You slapped his arm, earning another rumble of laughter as he moved to hover over you. “C’mon, if I make you sweat, it’ll make the breeze from the fan feel colder.” You rolled your eyes, studying his features as he looked down at you, hair framing his face and ghosting yours. “That’s counterproductive, you know.” Your hands were running up his biceps anyway, moving to wrap around his neck and pull him close to you. “Maybe it is, but you can’t say I’m wrong.”

His head was lowering, giving into your pull with no hesitation. “You’re right, I can’t say you’re wrong. But… I want to.” You smile, pulling him further until your lips melt together. He was radiating warmth, his teeth grazing your bottom lip to ask for entrance. Your lips parted, hands snaking up into his hair and tugging at the strands until he groaned. Suguru braced himself on one hand, making the mattress dip just by your head. The rest of his weight was settled on his knees, caging your hips in so you truly couldn’t get away from him. Not that you wanted too now.

You felt small beneath him, his bare skin radiating warmth as he used his free hand to push your shirt up. You could ignore the heat for the time being, more focused on the steady beating from between your thighs. “Sugu…” You parted with a gasp, watching him lean up and pull you with him, allowing him to drag your shirt over your head and toss it to the floor before pushing you down again. His lips didn’t return to yours, instead they moved to your neck, kissing along your pulse point until you were whining. “Quiet, baby, don’t forget we’re in my room.”

Satoru was asleep next door, that realization set in like ice water being dumped over your head. “Suguru.” You choked as his head dipped lower, licking along your collarbone before moving to one of your breasts. He wasn’t going to answer you, and you knew that for a fact by the way his lips curled into a smirk against your skin. “You’re evil.” You gasped, hand fisting his hair tightly as he scraped his teeth along your breast, nipping at the soft skin. Your other hand found its home on his shoulder, nails scratching lightly as his muscles flexed under your grasp.

You sunk your teeth into your cheek when his lips wrapped around your perked nipple, arousal making it pebble slightly as he sucked. Suguru’s tongue lavished your skin, flicking the bud until your back was arching into his touch. It wasn’t nearly enough, your breath coming out in short pants as you tried to pry him off and focus on your other breast. “These would look so pretty if they were full of milk.” You choked, eyes wide as he looked up at you through his lashes. “Don’t you think?” You couldn’t breathe for a moment, stunned into silence by his comment.

“C’mon baby, don’t act so shocked.” He cooed softly, the tip of his tongue trailing up your sternum. He didn’t stop until he reached your lips, kissing them softly before dipping his head again. His hand toyed with the breast he had just teased endlessly, brown eyes observing the rate of your breathing before lowering onto your other breast. He repeated the same motions, nipping and sucking the senstive skin until you were squirming from the wetness between your legs.

“You haven't answered me, sweetheart.”

“B-because I don’t know how to answer that, Sugu.” You knew exactly what he was implying, but you couldn’t form a coherent response for him. “You just have to tell me if you agree, it’s pretty simple.” He chuckled, pushing himself up to look down at you. Your hands fell to your sides, his neck just out of your reach. “Just think about it, pretty girl.” You watched him, completely entranced as he pulled his briefs down and his erection sprang free. “Because I’ve been thinking about it a lot.”

“You have?” You sat up a bit, fingers shakily pulling off your own underwear to save time. “I have.” He confirmed, cheeks turning a shade of red that you could see even in the moonlight. His hand slid along his length, spreading the precum drooling from his tip while his boxers rested at his mid-thigh. “Take those off, Sugu.” You smiled a bit, reaching for the waistband and pulling them taut before letting them snap back against his thigh. “So demanding.” He snorted, letting himself go to push the material off, tossing it to the floor just as you had done with your underwear.

“So are you, demanding an answer for something so…so…” you couldn’t find the right words, not when his eyes were on you, devouring you whole. “…so what? How does it make you feel?” He redirected, pumping himself leisurely as your thighs fell open for him, still supporting yourself on your elbows as you waited. “How does what make me feel?” A stupid question but you were still reeling from the initial statement. Suguru laughed, hand still gliding over his length as he sat on his knees.

“How does it feel knowing I think about getting you pregnant… all the fucking time.” You couldn’t deny the thought made you feel hot, hotter than you felt from the heat and arousal mixing. Like molten lava was running its way through your bloodstream. “F-feels fucking…” you squirmed a bit, legs moving to close involuntarily until his hand shot out and stopped them. “Go on, pretty girl. Tell me.” You sat up, glaring at him with warm cheeks. “How about you fuck me. Then, maybe, I’ll tell you how I feel about your little fantasies.” Suguru groaned, head falling forward for a moment.

“Sounds like a good deal to me.” He moved forward, pressing you back into the mattress as he pulled your thighs towards him. Your lips found his neck, sucking on it harshly as he ran the dull head of his cock between your slick folds. You let him move you however he pleased, your legs being pushed almost painfully to your chest as he pressed into you. You gasped in unison, his cock stretching you open easily despite no prep. “Shit…” his head fell forward again, nearly bumping yours as he bottomed out, no space left between the two of you.

Suguru stayed in place, eyes shut as he focused on the way your walls fluttered and squeezed around him, unable to stay still. Your nails dug into his scalp, pulling a groan from his lips as you tried to relax but couldn’t. He was big, bigger than any fling or partner you had in the past. No matter how easily your cunt accepted him, it still stung for the first few seconds. You had grown to love the deep ache, the weight of him inside you, the way his tip would brush your cervix depending on the position. Like now, with your legs pressed so tightly to your body.

“Can I move?” his voice was soft, eyes peering into your own once he gained his composure. “Y-yeah.” You breathed out, the feeling of his hands on your skin still sent shockwaves of arousal through you. Especially when his grip tightened, bracing himself on you as he drew his hips back half way before rolling into you again. You moaned, eyes squeezing shut as Suguru found his rhythm, hips meeting yours with a soft slap. “D-Don’t forget Satoru is…” You wailed softly, pleasure building quickly as he moved. “I know…”

But the smirk on his face told you he no longer cared, he’d gladly listen to his white-haired best friend bitch and moan in the morning about being woken up by you. Suguru’s rhythm only sped up, hips angling perfectly to brush along that one particular spot as he thrust into you, cock head brushing your cervix every few thrusts until your vision was blurring. The pleasure ebbing through your body was more than enough to block out how uncomfortable your current position was.

A wet squelch started to emit between your legs, loud enough to be heard over the drone of the fan as Suguru pounded into you. “So…” he started, voice strained as sweat dripped down his temple. “... can you tell me how it makes you feel now?” You blinked, awestruck that he was still hooked on getting an answer from you. “S-suguru…” you whined, head falling further into the pillows. “I’m not letting it go…ha… Tell me how it makes you feel.” he ground out, hips slowing just a bit. When you didn’t speak, he pressed more of his weight into you so one hand could break free.

You moaned, loud and unrestrained as his fingers ghosted across your swollen clit, the sudden contact making you see stars. “Tell me how it makes you feel.” he repeated, watching your face go slack as his fingers and hips worked in tandem. “Makes me hot…” You admitted with a heavy breath, eyes struggling to focus on him. “I want you to do it, Sugu… fuck me till I’m pregnant.” The look on his face had you shrinking further into the mattress, an almost animalistic look taking over his eyes as he stopped moving all together. “Say it again.”

“I want you to fuck me ‘til I’m pregnant, Suguru.”

You woke up in a sweat, gasping for air as you stumbled out of bed and barreled to the bathroom. You couldn’t stop the nausea this time, knees hitting the tile floor with bruising force as you heaved into the toilet. You hadn’t even remembered falling asleep, but your dream was enough to send you into a death spiral. Tears burned your eyes as the little bit of breakfast you hadn’t digested came back up. Luckily for you, you had slept long enough that your food from this morning wasn’t a total loss. Nothing more than bile was left as you finally calmed down.

You reached for toilet paper, wiping your tears and blowing your nose until you could at least breath without difficulty. Aching, you got up, flushing the toilet and washing your hands and face. You had no idea what time it was but you assumed it wasn’t late enough for dinner if Shoko never came to wake you up. At least that’s what you thought as you stumbled back into your dorm room slightly sweaty. That’s odd… The sun had begun to set just beyond your window, your eyes flickering to your alarm clock. 7:23pm stared back at you in big red numbers.

I slept for over eight hours? You looked for your phone, seeing the missed text from Shoko.

Shoko: I decided against waking you up, I figured you could use the sleep. Just text me when you’re awake and I can bring you dinner

You were partially grateful for her decision, your face still warm as your dream lingered in your mind. Dreaming of the past, how cliche. You sighed, sitting on the edge of your bed. You had woken up so suddenly, adrenaline blocking out the sleepiness at first. Now, your body seemed to thrum with a dull ache, the headrush coming back around to kick you while you were down. You reached over to turn on the small lap residing on your nightstand, eyes squinting for a moment as you adjusted. Your eyes focused on the brown bag from earlier, the one you discarded on your floor after coming back.

You knew there was water in there still, so you got up and grabbed it, looking at the bag contents in disdain. You emptied it on your desk, nausea meds, barf bags and the box of pregnancy tests. You studied then as you gulped down some of the water, easing the burn in your throat. The pregnancy tests Shoko had insisted on were identical to the one you took this morning. Weirdly enough you wished she had grabbed the more expensive digital ones. That way you wouldn't have to strain yourself trying to figure out if a second line was present or not.

“Fuck it.” you sighed, dropping the now empty water bottle in the small barrel you kept beside your desk. You still had one more test in the box from this morning, you’d take another one just because of the memories lingering on your mind. Your face felt warm as you recalled that particular night from a few months back. Suguru had been pretty adamant after that, fucking you raw and in ernest with every intention of knocking you up. You, stupidly, let him because you love him and loved the idea of having a family with him. “Idiot.”

You scolded yourself again, ripping the foil wrapper and tossing it in your trash with the now empty box. You went through the same process as you did that morning, peeing into a cup and dipping the absorbent end into it for ten seconds before capping it and discarding the rest of the contents. You forced yourself to leave the bathroom this time, convinced it would make time go by faster. The text Shoko had sent was still left unanswered, you couldn’t even bring yourself to feel hungry at that moment in time.

You’d text her in a little while though, or else she’d likely come breaking your door down thinking you had run away. Just then, your phone vibrated with the ringtone you had set for Satoru. You grabbed it, flipping it open to see what he had to say. On the screen there was a message from him, asking if you wanted to hang out on the rooftop to watch the stars later on. You smiled a bit, it was rare for Satoru to ask things so formally. You clicked out a message, telling him yes and that you could use some fresh air.

It took him no time at all to send a happy emoticon, one that had you rolling your eyes as you typed back that you’d meet him at his dorm when you were ready. You backed out of the chat, eyes lingering on a particular contact, your message to him was naturally left unanswered. You had given up texting Suguru’s number when the messages no longer got delivered. You figured he’d discard his phone, throw away any direct contact he had with the three of you. You snapped your phone shut a moment later, you’d text Shoko after you got dressed.

Opening your closet was still proving to be a bit difficult, especially as your fingers trailed over the material of the clothing Suguru had kept in your room. They smelt like the laundry detergent he used as well as his cologne, it took your breath away for a moment. You forced yourself away, grabbing some comfortable clothes that were actually yours before shutting the door. You didn’t think you’d ever be able to discard his clothing, despite knowing he wasn’t coming back to you.

You pulled his shirt over your head, grabbing your own and replacing it. You pulled on a pair of shorts after, rubbing your face with your hands as you looked at your appearance in the mirror. No amount of sleep seemed to help the dark circles under your eyes or the sickly look to your complexion. You could only hope Satoru was right, with time it would become more manageable. You glanced at your alarm clock, 7:48pm stared back at you now. The sky outside your window had turned indigo, the sun minutes away from being completely out of sight. The summer was coming to an end, filling your chest with melancholy.

You couldn’t stand being alone in that moment, grabbing your phone and shoving it in your pocket as you made a beeline for your door. You made your way down the hall, remembering as you passed Shoko’s dorm that you needed to text her. Stopping in your tracks, you figured it would just be easier to see her in person. “Shoko?” you called, fingers tapping the door softly because she hated when people knocked too loud. “Coming.” You heard her rustling around her room before the door opened, a half smoked cigarette hanging from her lips.

“Thought Yaga told you no smoking inside.”

“What he doesn’t know won’t kill him, and my window is open.”

You smiled, “I’m hanging out with Satoru on the roof if you wanna join us.” Shoko exhaled, puffing just a bit of smoke in your direction. “I’d love to but I spent the whole afternoon with him ‘cause you were sleeping.” You sighed, rubbing the back of your neck “my bad.” but Shoko was waving you off. “Don’t apologize, you need sleep… I’ll trust Satoru to feed you if you’re hungry.” She smiled as you rolled your eyes “Alright alright, enjoy the rest of your bad habit and I’ll take Satoru duty.” The look in Shoko’s eyes made your smile falter for just a moment.

They looked oddly wistful, but it vanished just as quickly as your smile faltered. “Aye aye captain.” Shoko started to shut the door as you turned to leave, watching you go for just a moment before shutting it completely. “Satoru.” You drawled, banging on his door so you could be heard over the music he was playing. “Oi, keep it down!” the door swung open a moment later, a cheeky grin on his face as he looked at you. “Ready to go?” He looked cozy in an oversized black hoodie and sweats, sunglasses resting on top of his head.

“Sure am.” you returned his smile, the ache in your chest easing just a bit. It was more bearable when you had someone who understood the pain you felt deeper than surface level. You watched him turn, shutting off his music and the lights before stepping into the hallway. “Are we going to take the normal way or are you going to test out your blue?” Satoru’s eyes seemed to sparkle as you suggested he use his curse technique. “If you insist on blue…” You couldn’t even make a sound as his arm wrapped around your waist, hauling you off of your feet.

In the blink of an eye, you were exposed to the cooling night air. “Damn.” You laughed as he set you down, shuffling over to the small lock box you kept up here with spare blankets and, as Shoko claimed, “necessities”...Which were just two cartons of emergency cigarettes. “Didn’t disorient you, right?” Satoru was standing on the edge, observing the glow of the city in the distance. “Not even a little, you’ve improved a lot, Satoru.” your back was turned to him, so you missed the way his eyes widened slightly, cheeks turning pink.

“Thanks”

You turned back to him, blankets in hand. “So…” You walked over to where he was standing, taking a seat just before the edge and letting your legs dangle off. “...So?” Satoru looked down at you, watching you settle. “Why did you want to come up here… I’d love to gaze at the stars but it’s not like we’ll actually see any with all the light pollution.” Satoru sighed, dropping down to squat beside you. “I guess I just wanted your company… ya know since you’re probably the only other person that understands this.” his tone was awkward, it wasn’t often that you were sentimental… or serious for that matter… with each other.

“Your welcome to have my company any time, Satoru. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you.” It was so heartfelt it made you feel strange. “Sorry.” You added, a bit meeker than before when he stiffened a bit. “Don’t be sorry, just not used to being so… serious with you.” He sat fully now, shoulder brushing yours as a silent invitation for you to rest your head. You did, just as you always had, watching the lights of the city a few miles away. “It’s strange, isn’t it?” You spoke in a gentle tone, hoping he knew what you meant.

“It is. Knowing he’s there, that he’s okay… while we’re sitting here sulking like idiots.” There was a small bite to his tone as he finished, one that quickly left when he exhaled. “It pisses me off.” It made you upset too, anger bubbling in the back of your mind like a pot of boiling water that was going to overflow at any second. “It pisses me off too, because I truly can’t understand it. I’ve killed myself over the last three weeks trying to understand, to make sense of it. I can’t and I don’t think I ever will. But it’s not my place to reason with it, you know?”

Satoru was silent, waiting for you to continue. “It’s not my life, it’s his. I tried for months to get it out of him, I tried so goddamn hard to get him to open up and he never did. Always redirecting, always avoiding.” You sounded defeated by the end, blinking away the tears that blurred your vision so you could regain composure. “Why didn’t you come to me?” Satoru questioned softly, letting your words sink in like an anchor.

“He gave you so many signs, Satoru. If you couldn’t see them, it wasn’t my place to assist.”

Satoru felt like that should have made him angry, but it didn’t. Mostly because you were right, it had been obvious from the start but he had naively pushed them to the side, pretending it wasn’t true. He was just as much at fault, if anything he was willing to shoulder all of the blame. Because at least you tried. He couldn’t say the same, and he knew that far too well. “Suguru made up his mind the moment he entered that village. There is no stopping a man who is set in their resolve. You said it yourself, Satoru. He looked healthier, happier, content.”

Satoru took in a shaky breath, leaning into you just as you leaned into him. “I just don’t get why he needed to kill his parents.” Your eyes closed, that was the thought weighing heaviest on your mind. “He needed to prove to himself that he was doing the right thing. That nobody, not even his parents, were an exception to his newfound ideology.” It killed you to say it, especially since you had met his parents last winter break. They were kind, at least his mother was. His father was a bit colder but there was still an undeniable love for his son. They had welcomed you so openly, they were proud of the son they had raised.

Now they were gone, nobody but Suguru was to blame.

“In a fucked up way, I don’t care that he killed those people.” The words felt bitter on your tongue, but his letter flashed through your mind and for a moment you understood him. Those two little girls, beaten and caged, scared and facing death for things they never did. Hell, had you gone on the mission with him, you may have encouraged his choices. That realization felt weird as it settled in your gut. “I… I don’t really care either.” Satoru admitted softly, thinking back over the last year, thinking about Amanai. He had been seconds away from doing the same thing.

But Suguru had been his voice of reason, stopping him with a simple command. It should have been obvious then, that Suguru’s life was completely altered from that moment forward. “It was so obvious.” He hissed softly, head falling forward just a bit as anger squeezed his heart. “There is nothing we can do now, Satoru. Nothing we can do will reverse the damage that has been done.” You wished you could believe your own words, part of you wanted to catch a train into the city and barrel into that religious group he took over.

You weren’t even sure what you’d do if you did. Hit him, yell at him? Crumple into his arms like the sucker you were. Maybe a mix of all three, no, it would definitely be a mix of all three. You couldn’t help but wonder how he would react if he saw you again. He made it clear in his letter that he loved you, he still loved you, he would always love you. If you made the choice to leave, would he welcome you in with open arms. Or was he resenting you already for not doing so sooner. Was he waiting for you? Or was it nothing more than sweet-talk.

“You’re not breathing.” Satoru muttered softly, tilting his head just a bit to look down at you. “Oh…” You inhaled deeply, laughing a bit as you exhaled “got lost in thought.” You felt Satoru relax again, head resting against yours. “I get it.” You fell into a comfortable silence, watching as the sky steadily turned from a deep blue to pitch black. There, if you squint hard enough, you could make out a couple of sparkling stars.

You knew if you asked, Satoru could probably whisk you somewhere far away. Somewhere clear so you could actually see the stars with no obstructions.

Yet you were too comfortable, too warm.

Sitting where you were now was more than enough for the time being. That feeling of content actually took the air from your lungs for a moment, blinking steadily as you took in your surroundings. There was a fleeting moment where your heart felt light, that aching heaviness that had been plaguing it for the last three weeks wasn’t present. You wondered quietly if Satoru felt it too. Given the way his body seemed completely relaxed into yours, you assumed he did.

You were stumbling down the hall like a drunkard. Your mind felt numb as you moved, head tilted down and expression blank. If anyone were to cross your path at that given moment, they probably would have been unsettled by the sight of you. A zombie moving on autopilot, your brain moving so quickly that it had reduced everything to a quiet, droning buzz.

Murder. 112 people. His parents too. He’s gone. He snapped. He’s a murderer. Suguru is gone.

Nothing made sense, not a single bit of the information you had received made any sense. The fact that Suguru wasn’t answering your frequent texts wasn't making sense. The fact that you had woken up to an empty bed wasn’t making sense. The fact that people were telling you Suguru, your Suguru, had taken over a hundred lives in the span of one night wasn’t making any fucking sense.

Your knees nearly gave out the moment your hand met the wood of your door, pushing it open so quickly it slammed into the wall with a loud thud before coming back at you. Not that you cared, at that moment you could be set on fire and you wouldn’t blink an eye.

You stood in the middle of your dorm room, eyes scanning the room as if it were something foreign. Nothing was making sense, not even your bed looked like your own. It was the pressure cracking down on you already, sinking its claws into your shoulders and forcing you to your knees as the weight of your new reality hit you like a freight train. You couldn’t even bring yourself to cry in that moment, too shell shocked over the report Yaga had read to you and Satoru.

Satoru.

You had stumbled away shortly after the report was finished, barely registering the way he had started to yell. You hadn’t looked back, but it wasn’t like either of them tried to stop you. Despite having just stumbled away from him, you found yourself moving to leave and find him again. At least you would have if your knees didn’t give out on you. You gasped, more out of surprise than pain as your legs made contact with the wooden floor. You sat there for a moment, arms feeling equally as weak as you pushed yourself into a sitting position.

You felt your chest tighten, every breath felt strangled as you tried to inhale. A cold sweat seemed to cover your skin, fingers shaking slightly as you pushed your hair from your face. You couldn’t move, completely paralyzed by shock. It felt like your heart was shattering, every shaky inhale deepening the wound. Still, your tears would not come. Not even as black spots began to obstruct your vision, chest heaving as you began to hyperventilate.

Despite your body vibrating in distress, you felt a nearly silent calm. Like someone had flicked off the switch and stole your ability to hear.

Nothing and everything all at once.

“Hey? Y/N wake up…” You jumped a bit, hand coming up to touch the wetness on your cheeks. “You were crying in your sleep.” Satoru muttered softly, hand smoothing over your hair as he cradled you. “I-I was?” You didn’t even realize the change in position or the change in scenery. You were no longer sitting by the roof’s edge, instead you were sitting in Satoru’s lap, his arms holding you tightly as he looked at you with worry.

“You were.” he confirmed, letting you go just as you woke up fully. “Sorry for worrying you, I was just thinking about him… it’s so strange. I’ve been having such intense dreams of the past… I've had dreamless sleep for the last three weeks… so why now?” Satoru sighed, watching you get up to stand and stretch your limbs. “I don’t know. I’ve been having odd dreams about him but I don’t really remember how most of them go by the time I wake up.”

“It’s the universe’s way of torturing us… as if we haven’t been tortured enough. Wait, how long have I been asleep?” The temperature had dropped significantly, the moon was shining high in the sky now. “About an hour or so, I was actually going to bring you back inside but you started to cry and… well here we are now.” Satoru got up, stretching dramatically as you sighed. “You’d think after sleeping for eight hours I wouldn't be tired.”

You walked to the edge of the roof again, feet pressing firmly to the ledge as you looked down. “Being depressed will suck the soul out of you.” For some reason you couldn’t help but laugh. “You seem pretty wide awake, Satoru.” He joined you on the ledge, pushing you a bit to the side. Your training gave you quick reflexes so you didn’t flinch when he did it. “Oh please, you know I’m right.” You glanced at him, laughing softly.

“You are, but so am I. We can be depressed morons together.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm, earning another laugh as you punched his shoulder. “Touche, Gojo”

“Yuck, never call me that again.” His face had morphed into a scowl as you used his last name. He never liked hearing you call him anything other than Satoru. “Fine.” you crossed your arms over your chest, inhaling the cool air. “I think I’m gonna go shower and maybe make something small for dinner… Just so Shoko doesn’t string the two of us up on a lamppost.” Satoru nodded, watching you step off the ledge and move about the roof to put the blankets away.

“I’ll accompany you.” he jumped down, trailing behind you as you moved to open the door that would bring you downstairs. “In the shower? I’m flattered but–” the way his eyes rolled were enough to stop you mid-sentence. “Joking, Satoru.” he sighed out an “I know” closing the distance to haul you up. “Using the stairs is boring.” Within the blink of an eye, you were back inside and standing in front of your dorm room.

“Text me when you’re done showering and we can go get food.”

You nodded, one of the perks of attending school in Tokyo was the fact that the city never slept. You could go find a place to eat at three in the morning and they’d still serve you hot food. Your body sagged against the door of your dorm after shutting it. Flicking on the lights lit the room in a warm, golden glow. For the last three years you considered your room a sanctuary, it was your happy place after a long day of training. Now, it feels oddly cold.

You walked over to your dresser, pulling the top drawer open to grab a fresh pair of underwear and pajamas for after. You tossed them on your bed, reaching down for your bottom drawer to grab a particular towel you liked. It didn’t take you long to put your hair up, not in the mood to wash it just yet, and head to the bathroom. You squinted a bit as the nearly white fluorescent lights filled the room, if you had your way you’d change them to something softer.

It took all of five seconds for your world to come crashing down around you again, eyes zeroing in on the pregnancy test sitting on your counter. I fucking forgot about it…

You set your towel down on the counter, holding your breath as you took the step and reached for the test. You gave yourself no time to prepare, eyes scanning the results once before it hit you like a ton of bricks. You dropped it, letting it clatter on the porcelain counter as a jagged sob ruptured from your chest. Your hand came up to cover your mouth, the other resting on your chest, your heart thumping so wildly you were certain it would burst.

There, on the test, were two lines. It was positive.

You nearly fell forward, dropping down to the trash can beside your sink and rummaging through it without hesitation. Your fingers wrapped around the plastic test from this morning, yanking it up and looking at the results again. There, on the initial test from that morning, were two lines. You didn’t drop it this time, eyes staring at the results as if they’d change. Positive, this whole time it had been positive. You just hadn’t let the first test develop long enough.

“When… How…” You uttered softly, the logical part of your brain screaming at you to be realistic for a second rather than acting so surprised. The irrational side of your brain was still reeling from the revelation. As if Suguru hadn’t been adamant in trying to knock you up for months. “You fucking bastard… you get your way and leave me with the aftermath.” You were struggling, there was no way you’d be able to pinpoint when it happened until you found out how far along you were. For some reason, that was what made reality really set in.

Hot tears streaked your face, sobbing so harshly that it felt like your lungs would collapse on you. You moved in a blur, legs carrying you out of your dorm and down the hall until you were pushing open Satoru’s door. “Woah there, sounds like someone’s hun…” He looked up, the teasing tone in his voice dropping immediately when he saw the tears streaming down your face. “What the fuck happened? Are you hurt?” Satoru crossed the room in two long strides, hands cupping your face as your lips wobbled.

You couldn’t get the words out, crying harder as he ran his hands over you searching for some type of wound. “C’mon, what happened?” His tone had more of a bite to it than he intended but you were causing panic to seep through his veins. You couldn’t breathe, legs nearly buckling under the weight of your reality. Satoru seemed to catch this, hands shooting out to support you as he brought both of you to the floor. “Y/N, please.” he urged you, throat feeling tight.

You shook your head, still sobbing as you raised your hand meekly, the positive pregnancy test out in the open for him to see. Blue eyes widened significantly when he saw it, he didn’t even need to see the two lines to understand why you were so hysterical. “Oh…oh.” he swallowed, hand shakily taking the test from your hand to look at it. “Oh fuck.” it was just barely above a whisper, arm holding you just a little tighter as you cried into his chest.

At least part of you was aware of the possibility, Satoru on the other hand felt completely blindsided. “You two didn’t use protection?” He uttered softly, rocking you slightly without thinking as your cries continued, you couldn’t think at that moment, unable to calm yourself down. You managed to shake your head in response, unable to feel embarrassed as you admitted to not using condoms when with Suguru. “Fuck… did you ever use protection with him?”

He knew the answer, of course he fucking knew the answer. Suguru was utterly obsessed with you, so in love it was nearly nauseating. You shook your head again, confirming that you’d never once used protection with him. “Hey… c’mon…” he started softly when your body shook with the force of your cries but you were no longer making any sounds. He wanted to say it would be alright but he wasn’t sure if it would be.

That answer relied on you.

He couldn’t expect you to be alright, you had your heart broken three weeks prior by the man who often talked about proposing to you as soon as you all graduated. If those were the kind of conversations Suguru was having with him, he couldn’t imagine the conversations Suguru had been having with you. Well, that was a bit of a lie. Considering your reaction to the test results, it seemed this was a long sought after goal. Your cries were from heartbreak, not fear.

“I’ve been looking at rings.” Satoru glanced up, noodles dangling half way from his lips. “Hah?” He watched Suguru grimace a bit, some broth splattering as Satoru questioned him. “I’ve been looking at rings for Y/N.” Suguru stated again, a little more cautiously now, watching Satoru slurp the rest of the noodles into his mouth. “Suguru, we haven’t even entered our third year.”

“I know, but…” he shrugged, unable to formulate the right way to say it. “...But? You’re not even eighteen yet, neither is she.” It wasn’t that Satoru didn’t think it was okay, he just figured you were both way too young to even fathom those things. “I don’t intend on proposing to her until we’ve graduated. Listen I know it seems fast but…” Suguru's hands fidgeted with his utensils for a moment, eyes avoiding Satoru until he was ready.

“I love her, Satoru. I didn’t even think it was possible to love someone as much as I love her.”

Satoru blinked, a bit taken back by such a bold declaration over a bowl of cheap ramen. “I’m not doubting that you love her, Suguru. I just think it’s a bit crazy to think about these things so young.” Suguru sighed, watching Satoru with weary eyes as he moved to eat more noodles.

“We’re sourcers, Satoru. A long life isn’t guaranteed.”

“Breathe, please. You’re going to pass out.” Satoru’s hand was slapping your back as you coughed, the tears had finally begun to slow but you still weren’t able to form a coherent sentence. “Please…” he tried again, watching you try your best to take a deep breath. It was followed by another, this time it wasn’t superficial. After a couple more, you were able to rub the tears from your eyes and look at him without blurry vision.

“S-satoru I’m so so-sorry.” you hiccuped, your throat feeling raw from your crying. “You have nothing to apologize for, stop feeling like you have to apologize for everything you do.” he let you go a bit, motioning for you to get up with him and sit on his bed rather than the floor. He watched you crawl under his covers, curling up against his pillows, sniffling softly. Despite the weight of the conversation you were about to have, Satoru couldn’t help but chuckle.

He crawled onto his bed as well, sitting beside you but above the covers. “So… I guess the best place to start is… how did this happen. By that I mean, was it intentional?” You sighed, toying with the end of his pillow case as you spoke. “Suguru had been trying to get me pregnant for months now.” You felt warmth flood your cheeks, it felt awkward admitting something like that. “I knew the bastard had a breeding kink.” Satoru said it more to himself than you, but that didn’t stop the shrill yell of his name as you slapped his arm.

“I’m being honest! He just seemed like the type.” Satoru shrugged, holding back laughter as you rolled your eyes and settled back into sulking. “I shouldn’t be so blindsided by this, but it’s fucking ironic that he got what he wanted after he fucking left me… us.” you corrected softly, feeling selfish for being so focused on yourself when Satoru was hurting too. “The universe knows how to play cruel jokes, I’ve thought that my whole life. But, that’s beside the point. We can’t sit here and sulk over it, we need to talk about what to do next.”

You looked up at Satoru, eyes red from crying. It hurt his heart, you looked like a kicked puppy. In that moment he realized how heavily he relied on Suguru, because even now he found himself itching to grab his phone and call him for advice. What was worse, you were now looking to him for help, when really he was just as scared as you. “The next logical step is I need to find a doctor who can run a blood test and confirm the store bought tests are accurate. After that, they need to tell me how far along I am so I can pinpoint when this happened.”

Satoru nodded, you’d both have to fill in Shoko in the morning, she’d be able to help with all the medical bits. “I… I know this seems a bit invasive so please don’t take offense… but are you going to keep it?” Satoru fidgeted a bit, eyes watching as you seemed to zone out and think. Your initial answer was yes, of course, but were you really capable of raising a baby on your own? Then again, you didn’t think you could stomach giving them away for adoption, and you certainly didn’t want to get rid of them. Not after you chased this goal for months, regardless of the way things were right now. “Yeah, as terrifying as it is, I want this baby, Satoru.”

“Okay, so we got two of the biggest things out of the way. Now, the hardest…” you huffed as he trailed off, you weren’t entirely sure you were ready to answer the next question. “What do we do about Suguru, that’s what you’re going to say, right?” It was Satoru’s turn to huff now, nodding as he looked away from you to stare at his hands.

“He… he needs to know.”

“No the fuck he doesn’t.”

You both stared at each other, completely scandalized by the other’s response. “Satoru… He needs to know… he…he’s the fucking dad? How am I supposed to jus–” Satoru shook his head, hands coming up to rub his face before letting them fall back to his lap. “Suguru is a fucking criminal now, he murdered people. Hundreds of people I should fucking remind you and you just want to waltz back into his fucking life and tell him that shit?” You sat up now, eyes burning holes into his skull as you waited for him to at least look at you. “Do you hear yourself?”

You were seething, that same anger you held for Suguru leaving was now bubbling at Satoru for uttering his name like it was pure filth. Satoru stiffened, eyes turning to glare at you. But, every ounce of anger seemed to drain from his body when he saw nothing but hurt glowing in your tired and puffy eyes. “I fucking get it, Satoru. I know what Suguru did but fuck, how am I supposed to just get over him? How am I supposed to carry his child for nine months and push it out of my body just to raise it on my fucking own and never tell him? He’s the one that wanted this in the first place!” Tears glossed your eyes over, hands shaking as they fisted in his sheets.

His mouth opened before closing again, eyes looking away from you because he knew he'd never be able to try and talk sense into you when you looked at him like that. “And what if the child is unable to see curses?” he sounded defeated. “What then, Y/N? What if you give birth to this baby and they lack the ability to see them? That baby would be the very thing Suguru hates.” You froze, it felt like someone had poured ice water down the back of your neck. “If he didn’t spare his own parents, he won’t spare his own child.” Satoru swallowed, looking like he wanted to say so much more but didn’t. He let the words hang there, heavy and dark.

The silence stretched on between the two of you, mostly because you knew he was right. Just because both parents had the ability to see into the curse world and use curse energy, it didn’t guarantee that their offspring would also carry the same blessing. You blinked, hand subconsciously moving to rest over your stomach, as if it would do anything to protect them. “Suguru he… he wouldn’t…” Your words were weak and at that moment Satoru couldn’t bring himself to really fight with you. “But he would, y/n that’s the fucking issue, he would.” his voice was breaking, unsure if he should say what he wanted to say next.

“Then what am I going to do?” You were going to dissolve, tears burning your eyes again as the harsh reality began to sink in. “Let me help you, let me help you raise the baby. I can easily provide for the two of you.” He turned to look at you now, eyes burning with such intensity it stole the air from your lungs. “What?” you hadn’t meant for it to sound offended, you were shocked to say the least, but still the hurt that flashed through his features made you feel the urge to reach out and hug him. “Satoru I didn’t mean for it to come out so harsh…” You moved forward, arms wrapping tightly around his neck and hugging him.

It took a second but his arms came up to wrap around your middle, holding you tightly. “It’s okay, it was a bold statement to make so suddenly.” he soothed you when really you felt that you should be the one soothing him. “No it’s fine, really it just caught me by surprise and…” you hugged him a little tighter, burying your face in his neck. For a moment you nearly stiffened, that was something you usually did to seek comfort from Suguru. In that moment, you couldn’t bring yourself to pull away, finding comfort in Satoru’s reassuring embrace. “You don’t have to answer me tonight.” He hushed you, hand coming up to smooth your hair as he kept you close. “I doubt you have an appetite now, how about we just sleep?”

“I still need to shower.” You pulled away, laughing softly when you remembered what you had been in the process of doing before your world flipped. “Okay, then go and shower but please come back to me when you’re done.” His tone was quiet, something in it held no room for you to disagree. So, you let go of him reluctantly, nodding as you crawled over him to stand. “Again, you don’t have to answer me tonight, or tomorrow, or even next week. But please, think about what I said.” He stayed on his bed, watching you shakily grab the pregnancy test before heading for his door. “I will, Satoru. Keep my spot warm.” you smiled at him over your shoulder, heart still heavy as you disappeared through the open door.

The hot water on your skin wasn’t enough to wash away the dread growing in your chest. You found your hands absentmindedly running along your abdomen, still finding it hard to believe something was there, something that would grow into a living breathing human in a few months time. A mix of you and Suguru, how strange. This wasn’t how you imagined it would happen, nor were these the feelings you expected to experience when the time came. If anything, it made you more upset. You should be happy, you should be fucking estatic. You should be basking in the euphoric state of knowing you’d be having a child with the man you adored.

Instead, you had sobbed in the arms of his best friend, completely hysterical. And the man you loved had no idea you were even pregnant, that the very thing he wanted had been achieved and he wouldn’t even get to know. At least not yet. You had taken Satoru’s words into consideration, of course you did. But in the back of your mind, you knew there was no way you’d be able to go on with your life without ever telling Suguru. He would know, he would know of his child, you were already set on that. You twisted the knob, the water turning off a second later as you got out and dried yourself off a bit before wrapping the towel around you.

Your body was aching from the events of the last few hours. Returning to Satoru’s room and sleeping in his warm bed sounded like heaven to you. Sleeping next to someone again felt like heaven to you. You had to wonder what Suguru would think if he knew you were sharing his best friend’s bed – albeit nothing sexual was occuring between the two of you. And even then, Suguru had broken up with you in that letter, you were technically no longer his. The thought made you feel sick as you reached for the clothing you had laid on your bed. You pulled the shorts on first, reaching for the oversized shirt second, trying to ignore the nausea building in your gut.

You moved around your room without thinking, flicking the lights off before heading out the door and back down the hall. Satoru had changed into his own pajamas, hair damp from the shower he must have taken while you went to take yours. He only had his bedside lamp on, the pace beside him vacant and waiting for you. “Are you sure you don’t want food?” he questioned softly as you shut the door behind you. “I’ll eat a good breakfast if my morning sickness allows.” Those words felt foreign, referring to your nausea as morning sickness felt so bizarre. “Alright but if you wake up in the middle of the night starving don’t hesitate to wake me up.”

You laughed softly, huffing out an “okay” as you crawled over him and under the covers once more. Satoru pulled the blankets up over both of you before reaching over and flicking off the light. “Goodnight.” he spoke softly, settling into his bed as you rolled onto your side to get comfortable. “Night, Satoru.” You whispered back, eyes already feeling heavy, the comfort his bed offered was no match for the gnawing reality you were facing. For now, you were thankful for it.

“Think fast!” You laughed, hurtling one of the poles directly in Satoru’s direction. He turned, using infinity to block it just before it hit his face. “Nice! Your reflexes are getting faster.” You picked up another weapon, Suguru was watching you intently, an easy smile on his face. “Sugu!” You called, aiming to throw another pole. “Think fast.” you repeated, arm going back before using every ounce of strength to beeline it straight at him. Suguru smiled, summoning a curse easily to deflect it. “Not bad.” you winked, watching him roll his eyes as the curse disappeared.

“Y’all are gross.” Satoru drawled, pushing his glasses up his nose. “We didn’t even say anything?” Suguru countered, stepping out of the shade and into the sun. “You don’t need to say anything, the tension is almost unbearable.” Shoko chimed, twirling her lighter around her fingers as she watched the three of you. This time you couldn’t help but laugh, letting Suguru close the distance and wrap an arm around your waist. “See, gross!” Satoru sighed dramatically as you kissed Suguru’s cheek. “It’s called being in love, something you wouldn’t get, Satoru.” You stuck your tongue out at him, laughing as he rolled his eyes.

“Well if you’re gonna be all gross and lovey with one another, go do it in private.”

“Okay.”

You and Suguru spoke in unison, a shrill laugh leaving you as he bent down and hauled you up and over his shoulder. Naturally Shoko faked a gagging noise, watching as he carried you away with a smile. “They’re so gross.” Satoru commented again, eyes following the two of you until you were completely out of sight. Though, he couldn't deny the small smile tugging at his lips.

“Suguru.” you slapped his back lightly, he was still carrying you over his shoulder even after entering the dorm buildings. “Hmm?” he paid you no mind as he climbed the stairs, his end destination would be your dorm room… more specifically your bed. “You can put me down now.” You knew he wouldn’t, so you opted for running your hands along his back, feeling his steps falter for a moment before composing himself. “I’ll put you down when I’m good and ready.”

You rolled your eyes, playfully swatting at his ass. “Alright, that's it. You’re getting punished.” His words were very matter-of-fact, so much so that you couldn’t help but burst out laughing. “Okay dad.” Suguru didn’t miss a beat, stalking down the hallway towards your dorm room. “Yeah, I’m trying to become one so it would help me out if you cooperated.” You made a strangled noise, it had been three weeks since Suguru admitted to wanting to get you pregnant. Needless to say, he wasn’t giving up any time soon.

“You just want a reason to fuck me.” You tried to counter, jumping a bit as he pushed into your dorm room and kicked the door closed behind him. “I don’t need a reason to fuck you, baby.” You couldn't describe the noise you made, whiplash taking over as he tossed you onto your bed. “I guess that’s true…” You pushed up on your elbows, watching him pull his white shirt up and over his head, knocking his hair out of his bun in the process. “You’ll be good for me right?” He was dropping to his knees before you, a gentle plea of his name leaving your lips.

“Atta girl.” he murmured, warm fingers hooking in the waistband of your shorts and pulling them down. You watched him with parted lips, watching the way his eyes observed you. “Already wet? How fucking filthy.” his hands splayed along your thighs, pushing them wide open so he could really look at you. “Just because I picked you up? Or maybe it was from wrapping my arms around your waist?” He teased, pulling one hand from your thigh to spread your cunt open instead. “Tell me, pretty girl… what has you so worked up already?”

“All of it.” You’re breathless as you look at him, no shame in your eyes as you admit how badly you want him. Suguru smiled, fingers keeping you spread as he watched the arousal pool at your entrance. “All of it, hmm? I make you that horny?” His tone was light but the look in his eyes was anything but. You could feel him devouring you whole. “Yeah, you fucking do.” You tried to keep your hips still, praying he’d do something other than watch you grow wetter by the second. “Tell me something, would you?” he pulled his eyes away to meet yours.

“Anything.” You comment softly, waiting to hear what he had to say. Suguru smiled, fighting the urge to reach up and tuck some of your hair behind your ear. “Tell me what you want me to do to you.” His voice was barely a whisper, pupils blown wide as he looked at you. You audibly groan, face feeling warm as your head falls back. “Eat me out, Suguru.” You drawl, no longer embarrassed by the things he makes you say. “As you wish.” He couldn’t even tease you for such an honest answer. Suguru’s head dipped lower, tongue licking up your inner thighs, teeth grazing the skin eagerly.

“Sugu…” You whined out, his lips growing closer to your aching cunt. “... can I suck you off after?”

Suguru’s whole body jolted as you uttered those words, mouth moving to lick and suck along your folds as his honest answer. You took that as a yes. You couldn’t help but squirm as his hands began kneading the flesh of your thighs, all the while his tongue was lapping at your cunt. Each movement sent electricity up your spine, one hand shakily reaching out to hold his head as his lips wrapped around your pulsating clit. “Oh fuck… Suguru…” you were embarrassed by how quickly he had learned to make you cum, the pressure already building in your gut.

He didn’t slow, rather he slipped two fingers into your slick entrance and scissored them in time with his sucking. He loved to put on a show for you, going as far as to slurp your juices just so he could hear you cry out. You couldn’t think straight when his tongue was wiggling against your clit, stopping every few seconds to suck until your back arched. Suguru continued this until he felt your fingers tighten in his hair, pulling harsh as your moans turned into breathy gasps. He pulled away with a slick pop, smiling deviously as your head shot up to glare at him. “Suguru!” You wailed, letting go of his hair angrily.

“Not yet, I don’t want you coming yet.”

“No fucking fair!” you whined, head falling back against the mattress in defeat. “So selfish.” Suguru laughed as he pushed himself off the floor, now making a show of pulling the rest of his clothing off. “There goes your chances at getting head.” you chided, watching as that shit eating grin remained on his lips. “You think this is funny!” you whined again, the echoes of your denied orgasm making you close your thighs to try and alleviate the pressure. Suguru watched you, cock throbbing as he kicked his pants off the rest of the way and tossed them to the side.

“I do think it’s funny, mostly because you look so cute when you’re so worked up.” his hands wrapped around himself, pumping languidly as you spread your thighs again, eager for more. Suguru smirked, always defiant until his cock was out. “Nah baby, I don’t think you deserve this right now.” he continued to stroke himself, head falling back just a bit as his own aching arousal was finally being relieved. “Sugu…” you choked out in a hushed whisper, mouth watering as he let out a breathy sigh, fingers toying with the sensitive tip. You were regretting your earlier statement.

“Sugu…” you spoke softly, watching him lift one leg to plant his foot on the mattress, hand still gliding along his shaft as his jaw slackened. He ignored you, continuing to get himself off. He was waiting for you to do something, that realization had you pushing yourself up, pulling your shirt up and over your head and tossing it to the ground. You pulled your legs off the side of the bed, maneuvering yourself until you sat on your knees before him. “Let me suck you off.” breathless, hands folded neatly on your lap as you waited for his response.

Suguru smiled at you, watching the mattress move as your hips squirmed. “I thought you said the chances of me getting head were gone.” he teased, hand massaging just before the head of his cock, making his own voice falter as he spoke to you. “I never said that.” which was kind of true, you didn’t say those exact words. Suguru cocked an eyebrow, unable to maintain his stern demeanor as your tongue moved to wet your lips, eyes completely focused on his fist. “Please, your hand is so boring Suguru, especially when you could have my mouth.” you tried again, eyes sliding up his torso, admiring the dips and plains of his muscles.

“When you put it like that, it’s hard to say no.” he murmured softly, letting his cock go. You scooted closer, until your knees were nearly off the edge of the mattress. “Thank you.” You whispered softly, watching his face flush a shade of pink, eyes quickly looking away from you to try and regain some sort of composure. The first touch was always enough to make him weak in the knees, your tongue gliding gently over his weeping tip before lowering to the underside of his shaft. He met your eyes, face still flushed as you looked at him with such adoration. All the while your mouth was doing sinful things to him, your duality was enough to induce whiplash.

His fingers came up to rake through your hair, guiding you as your jaw slackened, head moving to engulf him in the wet heat your mouth had to offer. “Oh fuck…” Suguru choked when you didn’t stop moving, throat constricting as your nose brushed the unruly mess of black hair at his base. You held yourself there, drool dripping down your chin as your cheeks hollowed. Slowly you dragged yourself back, watching the shiny coat of saliva covering his shaft in your wake. You repeated those motions, finding a comfortable place to bob your head at, his length heavy on your tongue. “So good for me… fuck you’re so good for me… I don’t know what I did to deserve you…”

You merely hummed, ignoring the slow but steady ache building in your jaw as your hand moved along his shaft. You could tell he was starting to really feel it, his cock twitching every few motions, head tilted back as his eyes fluttered shut. You had to admit you were impressed he managed to stay on his feet. Most times, when Suguru dared to eat you out while you were standing, you were nearly a dead weight in his grasp by the end. The only thing keeping you up was the wall he stuffed you against and his shoulders because he tossed your legs over them. You stopped when you felt him twitching violently, jaw clenched tight as his head shot forward to look down at you.

“Gonna make me cum, pretty girl.” He choked out, hands cupping your cheeks to guide you as you moved your head again. Your hands shot out, holding his thighs tightly as you let him use your head how he pleased, guiding you to a pace that made your eyes water before he stilled all together. You forced yourself to relax as Suguru spilled down your throat, letting you greedily swallow all of it before pulling off of him with a lewd pop. “Fuck…” he nearly fell into the bed, dick still hard as he crawled onto the matress with you. “How about we do this…” he sounded breathless, laying on his side and guiding you to do the same. You knew what he wanted, swollen lips parting as you sighed, settling with your back just barely touching his front.

You let Suguru grab one leg, lifting it up slowly to create enough space for himself. “Lazy boy…” You teased over your shoulder, letting his arm hook under your neck, large hand resting on your chest. “Maybe I am, but you fucking love it.” You couldn’t complain, not when he was angling his hips and pressing the weeping tip of his cock at your entrance. He pressed into you, adjusting both of your bodies until he found a comfortable position to properly rut his hips into you. All you could do is let him, whining loudly as he split you open, stuffing you full. “How’s that, hmm? Does it feel good?” Suguru whispered against your ear, panting as your walls constricted around him and tried to push him out at the very same time. “F-feels so good…so good…” You whined loudly.

Suguru didn’t give you a verbal response after that, instead focusing all of his attention on finding a good rhythm to fuck you too. You couldn’t stop the noises that spilled past your lips, each drag of his cock in and out of your heat was enough to make your vision blurry. It took everything in you to at least keep your head up, tilted downwards to watch where he disappeared and reappeared between your legs. “Suguru…” a breathless plea, one that turned into a steady mantra as all you could think about was him and what he was doing to you. Had you not been so overwhelmed you would have heard his quiet grunts of praise each time your bodies connected.

Suguru watched a shaky hand slide down your front, in your whimpering daze you managed to slip two fingers down there to rub sloppy circles on your clit. “Gonna cum, aren’t ya?” Suguru gasped, his cock twitching violently as your cunt suctioned to him, nearly making his thrusts falter. “Y-yeah…” you managed to get out, no longer having the strength to keep your head up. You let it fall, resting snuggly in the crook of the arm he was using to support you. “Then come for me, pretty girl. I wanna feel you come all over my cock… then maybe I’ll fill you up, yeah? You’d love that…” you responded with a loud whine, walls fluttering around his length each time he pushed it back in.

“There we go, come for me.” He encouraged again, warm breath ghosting the shell of your ear and earning a shiver in response. You could feel it, the aching build of a damn that was on the verge of breaking, every breath you made was nothing but a labored pant. Your heart was beating erratically, just as you were about to fall over the edge, Suguru gasped. You couldn’t help but gasp with him, his release pumping into you, hot and sticky. “F-fuck sorry…” he grounded out, his own orgasm sneaking up on him and completely catching you by surprise. Not that it mattered to you, that strained and embarrassed apology was all you needed before you felt yourself coming as well.

You both essentially collapsed, Suguru holding you tightly as he angled himself to remain inside of you, to keep his cum inside of you. “You okay?” he mumbled softly, hand lazily reaching for the one you had used to rub your clit and bring it to your lips. You whined as he popped the shiny fingers in his mouth, cleaning them with his tongue. “Yeah, I'm good…great really.” You chuckled, eyelids feeling heavy as he hummed. “Good.” he mumbled softly, pulling your fingers from his mouth to kiss them gingerly. “You know I love you, right?” Suguru’s voice was tender, so tender it nearly pulled the air out of your lungs. “Yeah, of course I know that Sugu… you know I love you too, right?”

“I know.” was all he said in reply, you had to wonder why he was suddenly so sentimental. Suguru was typically softer with you after sex, aftercare was one of his specialties. But something about his tone felt different, something about his question felt like there was more meaning behind it. You had been noticing the bags under his eyes for the last few weeks, but every time you asked he always brushed you off. “Is everything okay?” you tried to turn your head to look back at him, but the angle he had you in proved to make movement difficult. “Mmhmm, just want to make sure you’re okay.” but he hadn’t been that rough with you. “Yeah, I’m okay… but you haven’t answered me.” He stopped kissing your hand, setting it down gently as he moved to kiss your shoulder.

“I haven’t?”

“I asked you if you were okay.”

“Well, I did answer you. I said yes.” he didn’t sound offended, more or less he sounded amused. “Mmhmm isn’t a yes, Suguru.” You, on the other hand, sounded a little less enthused. “I’m okay, baby. Is that better.” you couldn’t see it but you could hear the smile on his lips. “Yeah, that’s better.” But for some reason, you couldn’t shake the worry clinging to your heart.

“Hey… hey…” you woke with a gasp, eyes wet as you tried to remember where you were. “You okay? You started crying in your sleep again.” A worried but groggy voice was speaking to you, one that was familiar but your brain couldn’t seem to catch up. “Y/N? It’s me, it’s Satoru.” There it was, you nearly fell back into the pillow with relief as he spoke. “Shit I’m sorry… I was dreaming and it just… fuck it felt so real. I couldn’t remember where I was…” you wiped your eyes, slowly adjusting to the dark room again. “It’s okay… you’ve been dreaming a lot.” Satoru sighed, he remembered you saying that your nights had been pretty dreamless for the last three weeks so why was that changing now?

“I know… it just started happening too. Maybe it's because of the baby.”

Your hand lowered to your stomach, palm resting flatley against it. You still couldn’t process the fact that there was something in there, something that was growing, a mix of you and him. “Can pregnancy make you dream more?” Satoru chuckled, blue eyes shifting to read his alarm clock. It was just past four in the morning. You had slept pretty well until a few minutes ago. He had been watching you, woken up by your body growing restless. He woke you up the moment he heard you start to sniffle. “I dunno, maybe.” you sighed, eyes feeling heavy again. “Sorry for waking you, Toru.” You didn’t hear the way his breath hitched, your yawn effectively shutting it all out.

You hadn’t called him by that nickname in weeks, he hadn’t really realized how much he missed it. “Don’t apologize, I told you to stop that.” Not stern, just tired, he wanted you to go back to normal but he knew that was impossible. Things would never go back to how they were. “Oh, yeah… I guess you have told me that.” You chuckle, turning on your side to face him in the dark. “I won’t apologize for forgetting this time, okay?” You grinned, eyes closing and unaware that he was able to see it in the dark. “Okay.” He sighed, a grin creeping up his own face as he let his eyes shut again. Hopefully you’d sleep through to his alarm at 8:30am, you had a busy day ahead.

~END OF PART ONE~

Thank you for reading! I hope you look forward to part 2 <3333

Likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated ;3

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x-reader-theater · 7 months

Text

Secret Messages from a Lover

summary: While you're streaming, your boyfriend sends you a message.

pairing: Corpse Husband x Gender Neutral Reader (no pronouns are used.)

word count: 670

warnings: none.

a/n: i really just needed to write something so self-indulgent because god i want this so bad. i figured others want it too. i've been so depressed lately that I just need a little fantasy, you know? my requests are open, and you can find my request rules here.

“God, that video is so fucking funny,” you say, pulling your blanket around your shoulders tighter with one hand while the other brings your patterned tumbler with the sparkly straw up to your mouth, so you can drink your water. Your knees pull further up to your chest, which is easily done in your very spacious gaming chair. “OTV never fucking misses.”

You press a button on your stream deck, switching from the video you were just watching to your face, with chat scrolling in the top left-hand corner. You take another sip from your tumbler and pick out one of the comments passing by, scrolling to stop it from moving as you read it aloud.

“Were you on the newest Fear& episode? I was. QT, Hasan, Will, and I just kinda chatted for a bit. That was a good fucking episode, though,” you say with a grin. “Love those guys. QT especially, she’s fucking hilarious. She makes me laugh so fucking hard whenever I talk to her, even if we disagree on Taylor Swift.”

You keep scrolling back down, so you can keep seeing the comments when another one jumps out at you. “Are you gonna keep streaming? Yeah, chatter, I actually just started before that OTV video. I think Toast is gonna invite me to some Pico Park today? If not, I’ll just play some Valorant or something to pass the time. I gotta git good if I wanna beat, well, anyone,” you admit with a laugh, hiding your shame by taking another drink of water.

You see your phone light up in front of you. It’s a Discord notification, which you quickly check on your second monitor, assuming it’s Toast inviting you to the Discord call.

It’s not. It’s your boyfriend, Corpse.

“You look so cute today babe. You look so cosy wrapped up in your blanket and your smile is so bright. I'll never get tired of seeing it. I love you and have a good stream 🖤”

You feel your cheeks heat up at that, and you take a sip of your water to try and hide your reaction. You haven’t told anyone you're dating Corpse yet, and you have no plans on it any time soon, but he makes you so happy you find it hard not to blurt it out whenever you can.

You send back a bunch of yellow hearts and an “I love you too!!!!!!! 💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛”, biting your lip as you type on your very satisfying, clack-y keyboard.

That’s when you get the notification from Toast to join the shared call.

“Ah! Toast’s calling!” you exclaim for the benefit of your audience.

You quickly join the call, the connection sound filling you comfortable, over the ear headphones.

“Hey! What’s up!” you say into the call, getting a couple of “Hey!”’s and “Hello!”’s back.

Then you hear a familiar voice say, “What’s up.”

“Corpse!” You’re grinning at this point as you continue, “I didn't know you were gonna be playing!”

“Uh, yeah. Toast invited me last minute. Surprise?” he says like it’s a bad thing.

“We haven’t played anything together in a while and I saw him online and thought, ‘Fuck it,’ yaknow?” Toast asks and you chuckle.

“Well, it’s good to talk to you again, Corpse,” you say, setting your tumbler down on your desk. He got you that tumbler for your birthday not long ago, and it’s your favourite thing you own. He also got you the blanket that’s wrapped around your shoulders for your six-month anniversary, and it’s the warmest blanket in your house. You always wear it when you stream because the A/C is always blasting.

“It’s good to talk to you too,” you say, shivering as your heart hammers at his words.

You begin loading up Pico Park, just listening to everyone talk to each other, when you get another notification on Discord.

“I love you 🖤” it says.

“I love you too 💛” you reply, smiling into the camera for just a moment, just for him.

#corpse husband #corpse #corpse husband x reader #corpse husband x y/n #corpse husband x you #corpse x reader #corpse x you #corpse x y/n #corpse husband x gender neutral reader #corpse husband x gender neutral!reader #corpse x gender neutral reader #corpse x gender neutral!reader

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definitelynotafurinasimp · 7 months

Note

Hello Henry :D I've followed you for quite sometimes and I really love your works!! So I'd like to request if you don't mind: Lisa, Shenhe and Yae with a very emotional reader. Like the reader can easily burst into tears, either when they feel too happy or too sad (kinda self-indulgent since that's me irl). I hope you can write this and if you don't that's fine!!! Thank you sm and have a good dayy!!!

Them with a very emotional reader

characters: Lisa / Shenhe / Yae Miko x gn!reader

warnings: none

a/n: *September 2022* OH GOD THIS REQUEST IS A YEAR OLD WHAT AM I DOING?!?! I am so sorry it took me this long, also, if you’re still following me and remember that you requested this anon, thanks for the nice words!

Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Lisa

When the sun started to set and most people had already left the library a long time ago, one person outside of the librarian would almost certainly still be seated where they’d been for hours already, reading the same book they had been reading for hours already while still breaking out in laughter, tears of joy or sad weeping depending on whatever they were reading.

A long time ago, Lisa would have felt her peaceful naps disturbed, almost going as far as to reprimand them for not following every library's most sacred law. And yet, as she heard you giggling to yourself now, she couldn’t help but feel the corners of her lips shape into a smile as she left the comfortability of her chair to rise before slowly making her way over to where you sat.

“And cutie? Like what you’re reading?”, the librarian asked once she was behind your chair, putting her hands on it and leaning against it until her face wasn’t too far from the side of your head, something that proved to be lucky as you quickly whipped your head around, causing you to nearly headbutt her, the happiness on your face almost as radiant as that of a dog excitedly wagging its tail at the sight of its owner.

“Lisa!”, you exclaimed with excitement, throwing the notion of trying to keep quiet in a library completely out the window.

“Very much so, it’s surprisingly funny. Everytime I think I know what’s going to happen next, it takes a completely different turn. I can’t stop laughing…”, you slowly trailed off, staring into the far for a split second before once again turning your attention towards her, your cheeks growing red from shame.

“I was loud again, wasn’t I? Of course I was, that was a stupid question. I’m sorry Lisa, I know that I’m supposed to be quiet in here but- I tend to lose track of the real world whenever I’m here”, you frantically apologized, talking so quickly Lisa could feel herself growing lightheaded trying to keep up with you, only to eventually calm you down with an assuring smile.

“I know. I’m sure most people that come here kind of expect to hear you already at this point, so don’t worry your cute head over nothing.”

“Anyway, want to tell me about the book?”, she asked before taking a seat next to you and listening to you excitedly recollect about the book.

It only took her a couple of sentences to realize she had already read it, managing to finish each of your sentences during your plot summary in her head before you. But as she looked at your happy face as you went on, interrupting you was the last thing on her mind.

Shenhe

There were times your behavior didn’t quite seem to make sense to Shenhe. Tears coming out of your eyes only for you to smile and reassure her that they were tears of joy when she awkwardly tried to console you. Crying not out of sadness but from feeling happy? Shenhe must have been even more out of touch with human emotions than she had realized, that or the last time she felt such happiness must have been too far in the past for her to remember.

At the end of the day it didn’t matter. If you were happy that was great, and if you showed your joy by bursting into tears then it was also fine. Even if it caused her to worry a bit.

Today was your birthday and while the two of you had agreed to spend the day together, Shenhe didn’t come empty handed. She had seen people buy each other presents for special occasions and how happy they made others, and so, before she had realized it, she went and asked her master for help with choosing something to give you.

In hindsight it would have been quicker and a lot less embarrassing if she had just kept to herself, Cloudretainers choices being… rather unorthodox, but once she was involved, there was no way Shenhe was able to back out. Or bring the present back with her for that matter.

So here she was, handing you the present as her chest tightened up, uncharacteristic levels of anxiety building up in her in worry you wouldn’t like it, and yet, as she finally looked back at you, seeing you stare inside the opened bag with tears welling up in the corners of your eyes, that same anxiety quickly found itself replaced with panic.

“I’m sorry, it was stupid of me to try and get you something when I’m this out of touch with human society. Please for-”, Shenhe was just in the process of apologizing, when you basically jumped at her and gave her a hug, happily swaying from side to side.

“Thanks Shenhe! Where did you even get a Cor Lapis Amulet this beautiful?”, you asked before pulling back for a moment and pulling the string attached to the stone around your neck.

Here you were again, crying while being happy and leaving Shenhe completely dumbfounded. And while she silently stood there for a few moments, letting everything that was happening pass by, a smile slowly made its way onto her face, your joy far too radiant for the red strings around her body to stop all of it from rubbing off on her.

Yae Miko

Somehow, was it because Yae took pity on someone this easily moved to tears or because your display of unfiltered joy and happiness was too contagious for her to ruin it with a comment or two, you found yourself almost unharmed by the notorious Guuji. Sure, there were still more than enough times even you had to endure her teasing, but even then it was anything but humiliating.

The same could not be said about whoever was unlucky enough to hurt your feelings, be it by deliberately being mean to you or saying something hurtful in the heat of the moment…

When you had entered Yae’s office while loudly and enthusiastically greeting her, only for her to respond with nothing more than a grunt of acknowledgement, the room quickly returned to being completely silent, causing her to eventually look up at you, wondering why your enthusiasm had died down so suddenly, only to be greeted with the sight of you spacing out, your expression growing increasingly worried and down.

“Is something wrong? Why so silent all of a sudden?”, she asked, finally putting her work to the side, causing you to snap out of it and look at her again, even if you avoided eye contact.

“Miko. Am I annoying?”

“Who called you annoying?”, Yae almost immediately shot back with another question, her voice betraying her determination to find out a name, and while she saw your eyes widen in surprise as you quickly tried to assure her that there was no one, she knew you better than to be fooled.

“I’m just saying that if I annoy you, you can tell me-”, you barely managed to get the sentence out of your mouth as small tears started forming on the corners of your eyes, before Yae cut you off again.

“My little bird, go around the streets and ask about me for a minute and you’ll find out quite easily that I’m not exactly someone that holds back when it comes to saying what I want. So don’t even think I’d be too afraid to tell you if I really found you annoying.”

By the time she finished talking, Yae stood only a meter or two in front of you, only to continue talking after a small pause.

“So. What’s their name?”

Was it out of intimidation or because some deep, part of you wanted them to get their comeuppance, but before you knew it, you had spilt the name, immediately feeling guilt over what was about to happen wash over you, only for Yae to give you a reassuring smile before lightly patting your shoulder.

“Sit down and make yourself comfortable, I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

#lisa minci #lisa imagines #lisa x reader #lisa #lisa x y/n #lisa x you #shenhe imagines #shenhe x you #shenhe x y/n #shenhe x reader #shenhe #yae miko imagines #yae miko x y/n #yae miko x you #yae miko x reader #yae miko

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softtdaisy · 2 years

Note

this is so self indulgent. imagine peter dating someone who stress bakes. one day peter gets really stressed over a mission and kinda takes it out on the reader and leaves. the reader now thinks that she did something wrong and starts baking his favorite things. eventually, peter comes home only to find out that his apartment has turned into a bakery and that his gf is crying while decorating a cake

_bakery

peter parker x fem!reader

based on: this request above

summary: when you feel like peter is mad at you, you decide to bake his favorite cakes

words: 803

a/n: I hope this story goes with what you had in mind. you didn't specify which peter you wanted this to be about so I put tasm!Peter but I can change that if you want ♥️

join my secret garden for my 1k celebration 🌸

“Just…leave me alone. For real.”

That was the last thing Peter told you, a few hours ago. He had just come back from a stressful mission. The type that played with his mind and made him wonder if he was making the right choice by being a superhero. Or even if he deserved to be.

The thing was when Peter was stressed, he was not the most affectionate boyfriend. So of course, when you started to comfort him, not only did he reject you, but he took it out on you. He said some mean things until he decided to leave, claiming that he was better off alone than here with you.

So now you were home alone, convinced that you did something wrong and that maybe Peter wasn’t even loving you anymore. You were so scared of losing him one day that you saw this kind of moment as the beginning of the end of your relationship.

And the only thing that managed to calm your stress, or at least to make you think about something else, was to bake. It has always been a kind of therapy, it helped you focus on something other than your problems. And sometimes, after you finished, you felt better. Today, you hoped it would help Peter forgive you.

You made a list of the things he liked the most, to pick some and decided which one you wanted to make. Turned out, you couldn’t choose one and decided to follow different recipes to make sure there would be one he would like to eat when he comes back. Was it a lot of work? Yes. It even stressed you a little more to have to bake all of these without making any mistakes and making sure they were all good.

When you finished three of them, you felt glad that you had this amazing idea. When you were baking the fourth one, you started to wonder if you weren’t making all of this for nothing. Peter had been good for a few hours already and he still hadn’t given you any news. Was he alright? Was he planning on coming back?

Turned out, he did.

Peter was coming home after spending a few hours at the top of different buildings. He needed to think about himself, about what he was doing. He needed to come back to place that meant something. And when he arrived at one of the rooftops, he brought you to when you started dating, he realized how bad he was towards you. He never meant to hurt you or to say anything that would break your heart. Most of the time, he didn’t even realize what he said before he saw your reaction. Today he didn’t get to see it since he ran away to focus on himself. But now he was ready to apologize and prove you how much he cared about. How glad he was that you were by his sides.

However, he was definitely not ready to find his apartment smelling like a bakery. There was a mix of his different favorite cakes smells. It smelt good. But it wasn’t supposed to smell like that. It didn’t take him long to understand what that meant.

When Peter entered the kitchen, he found you crying in front of the cake you were decorating. “Oh my god baby, are you alright?” If he knew what was probably going on right now, Peter feared that you might hurt yourself. He didn’t hesitate and took you in his arm, brushing your hair slowly and rocking you slowly to calm you down. He gave you little kiss on your hair to appease you and you seemed to be more relaxed.

“I…I wanted to make you happy with all these cakes, so that you wouldn’t be mad at me anymore, but I got lost in all of these recipes and…”

“Wait a second.” He took your face between his hands to look at you in the eyes. “Why would I be mad at you? You didn’t do anything wrong.” He frowned, trying to think about something you might have said or done but you were always so nice to him that nothing came to his mind. Then it struck him. “Is it because I left? Because it has nothing to do with you. Just because I needed some time by myself doesn’t mean I don’t love you with all my heart.” Peter took you in his arms again. You mumbled an “I love you too” against him, trusting him.

That’s when Peter noticed all the other cakes. “Ok, so we are going to eat cakes for every meal for a few days.” He laughed and kissed your hair. Nobody ever did this to him. It was probably the biggest proof of love he ever got.

#peter parker fanfiction #peter parker fic #peter parker x reader #peter parker #Peter Parker imagine #Peter Parker x you #tasm!peter x y/n #tasm!peter parker x reader #tasm!peter x reader #tasm!peter parker x you #tasm!peter parker story #tasm!Peter Parker imagine #andrew garfield x female reader #andrew garfield #andrew garfield imagine #andrew garfield x you #andrew garfield x reader #my writing #1k celebration

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komorim · 1 year

Text

you who is so dear

-> itoshi sae x gn!reader

[ synopsis. ] with so much on your plate, your health was the last thing on your mind. and even when you started feeling unwell, you decided to push through. however, your boyfriend wasn’t so okay with this problem solving method of yours

[ content warnings. ] none. (can you believe it??)

[ word count. ] 1k

[ author’s note. ] (new layout!) wow. my first non-angst fic. this is such a huge milestone honestly :x this was also super self-indulgent. i’ve been getting sick a lot recently though it’s nothing unusual (i have a terrible immune system) so this just kinda made me feel better i suppose.

“i’m home!”

you groan a bit, both as a response to your boyfriend’s greeting and as something to convey your current state.

you can almost hear the furrow of his eyebrows when he speaks, “what’s wrong?”

you’re hyper focused on the laptop in front of you, and in the dim light, the white light spreads across your face, painting your face a sickly shade. you keep typing on the keyboard and hear the soft footsteps of your boyfriend approach you slowly. yet you still don’t turn around or pause the work on your hands.

sae stands beside you and leans down a bit to stare at your screen, only to find that you’ve been cranking out an incredibly long essay for class. the crease between his eyebrows deepens as he captures your hands that continued to dance across the keyboard in an attempt to stop you. however, you only whine and slip your hands out of his larger ones to continue typing.

sae obviously did not like this behavior of yours. he grabs the back of your laptop and closes it slowly, giving you a bit of time to react and pull your hands away. it was this motion that finally allowed him to see your beautiful, yet distraught features, as you look up at him.

“please, sae,” you softly groan, “i have to finish this.”

he ignores your comment, and the tension between his eyebrows doesn’t let up as he looks at you. “you don’t look well.”

you run a hand through your hair, “uh,” now that you have a bit of a breather, you realize that you were indeed not feeling that good, “maybe i don’t feel the best. but it’s not a big deal.”

he brings an arm up and presses the back of his hand against your forehead softly. you notice how concern and worry fill his eyes as he retracts his hand.

“you’re burning, y/n.”

you raise a hand of your own to confirm his words, and when your hand comes into contact with your forehead, your eyes widen in surprise.

“whoa. i am hot. i thought that warm feeling was just a headache. i didn’t expect it to be my actual body temperature.”

“i can’t believe you got sick again. you’re such a dumbass, you know? who gets sick every week?”

your figure grows impossibly smaller, sinking into the couch even more as you listen to him scold you. “me,” you respond quietly.

“yes, you. only someone as irresponsible as you,” sae stands straight and heads for the medicine cabinet, “have you been taking your pills?”

“what pills?”

you hear the irritation in his voice as he replies. he’s probably filled with annoyance right now. he always hated it when you don’t take care of yourself.

“what do you mean what pills?” sae scoffs, shocked that you don’t remember, “the supplements the doctor gave you last time. you know, to help with your immune system?”

“ohh…i don’t remember if i did, if i’m honest.”

you hear sae counting something in the back, probably trying to figure out if you have taken your pills or not. “well, you haven’t. you forgot two doses.”

he pours a glass of warm water and grabs your supplements. walking over to the cabinet, he reached for the bottle of fever medicine before walking back towards you. “i seriously don’t understand how you survived this long. with your character, i wouldn’t be surprised if you died three years ago.”

“hey, i take care of myself just fine.” sae gives you a pointed look and your confidence decreases a bit. “well, that’s why i have you,” you joke, hoping to soothe his irritation a bit. you look up at sae as he stands over you, giving him a loving smile.

he passes you the bottles of pills and you take them. he sets the glass of water on the table in front of you.

“you’re such a nuisance,” he responds. and although his words are harsh, you know he doesn’t mean it genuinely.

“oh, but you love me.”

a slight tint appears on the tips of his ears, and even though that’s enough to give him away, you still play ignorant when he opens his mouth to deny your statement.

“just eat your medicine,” sae responds. after he watches you down pills after pills, he grabs your laptop. “come on now, go to sleep. it’s late.”

“but i didn’t finish yet. this thing-”

“i’ll finish it for you. get your rest. it’s more important right now.”

“but-”

before you can finish your sentence, sae grabs your wrist before gently dragging you after him as he heads for your bedroom. as you trail behind him, you smell the clean scent of his soap and you automatically start feeling better already. after all, you’re in the company of someone who loves you so much.

sae ushers you into the comfort of your shared bed, and he proceeds to tuck you in. “i’ll work in bed right next to you, so you don’t have to worry. just go to sleep first. i’ll finish pretty quickly.”

he climbs into the bed next to you, and you move over a bit so you can lean into his body heat. he moves closer to you in response as well. he begins typing on your keyboard and speaks without breaking his focus. “your only job right now is to get better, okay? can’t have my s/o getting sick all the time, now, can i?”

you pull the blanket underneath your eyes and you stare at his profile. “i love you,” you say.

and even if you always wish for him to say it back, you know he wouldn’t. he’s just like that. he turns to look down at you and replies with his usual, “i know,” reaching a hand to comb through your hair. the corners of his lips tug up slightly, smiling at your confession as if it was the first.

you feel your eyes droop as they struggle to stay open. and eventually, you fall asleep to the sound of sae typing on the keyboard.

a sound that proves he loves you too.

do not copy or repost my works. likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated.

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tsubasagirl · 1 year

Text

All Yours (NSFW! Gladion x afab!Reader)

18+!!! MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!! Gladion and reader are aged-up 18 year olds (unlike the canon ages where Gladion is 13-16 and the protagonist is 11), therefore they are consenting adults. I don’t intend to write anything illegal here… Also this is my first time writing actual smut, and I’ve been imagining/fantasising about this one-shot(?) for a long time now. There is another smutty Gladion x afab!Reader (possibly a sequel to this one) that I’ve also had in mind for a while, but I guess we’ll see how this one goes first. Enjoy this whopping 4.3k word long, bitter-sweet/angsty, first time [uh-oh word] one-shot(?)…

Oh and a bonus sketch dump at the end, altho it doesn’t exactly relate to the story and it was drawn over 2 years ago (it’s very self-indulgent; I felt too ashamed and kinda afraid to share it anywhere, especially there being the controversial opinions on self-inserts and all… probably gonna be a tumblr-exclusive art post ahehe…) Of course, there’s just naughty stuff and swearing in here, but nothing extreme to leave a warning about (Also again, as I’ve said with my previous fanfics, feel free to give me any constructive feedback :))

It’s been around a year since I became the champion of Alola, and a year since Gladion became the Aether Foundation president. We also started dating shortly after we claimed our respective roles. We were both often busy doing our own thing, but every once in a while, we would meet up to spend quality time together. Otherwise, we would try our best to get in contact with each other during the little free time we had.

However, from the past few months, Gladion has gotten much busier with his duties as president, so our brief catch-ups via text and phone calls became less frequent, up to a few weeks ago where he stopped contacting me all together. Of course, I’m also busy with my own duties as champion, but as time passes with zero response from him, my mind has been getting more clouded with his absence. It’s for the best if I don’t nag him and let him focus on his work. I’ve also been refraining myself from going to Aether Foundation to check up on him in person, although occasionally, I’ve been asking Wicke on how things have been with him. It was always something like “He’s had to deal with several different responsibilities everyday.” I would also tell her that I trust her to look after him in the meantime, but even so, knowing how reckless and dedicated Gladion is when it comes to accomplishing his goals, I bet he hasn’t been eating or sleeping much…

It’s been almost three months since I’ve last seen him in person. I’m normally content with just texting or calling him regularly, but not being able to play with his soft blonde hair, not being able to stare deeply into his eyes, not being able to melt into his touch — I miss it all so much. I miss him so goddamn much. Whether you wanna see it as deep love or borderline obsession, it’s almost impossible for me to live on normally without it lingering in my mind 24/7.

I mostly have it all together, but it doesn’t help that I’m ultimately just a teenager who tends to get very emotional, sometimes feeling a certain fiery sensation that can’t easily be put out. Every once in a while, when I’m all alone in my room, my mind is completely cluttered with Gladion — I can only visualise his sharp emerald orbs, hungrily eating me up from head to toe, his rasp voice uttering my name with delight, his warm arms wrapped around my form as I immerse into his scent, knowing that he is mine and that I am his — I lose myself in my fantasies of him. Caressing my breasts and fondling their peaks, letting my essence almost soak my bed, massaging my pearl and sliding digits into my folds. It would be sensual at first, but the pace would soon hasten as I think about him more, imagining that it’s him playing with my body, fucking me with his fingers, teasing me with his tongue, satisfying me with his shaft. I want him. I want all of him. I would cry out for him, longing for his love and yearning for his attention.

Now, it’s come to the point where I have a day all to myself… except I have no idea on what to do... How did I end up here? Not mentally but physically standing here in front of the route 8 motel… I’m a mess. I probably look like a fool, having no proper business here, only in sandals, board shorts and a loose tank.

This is where I first met him outside of battle. I just barged in, only to be scolded to get out. What did I even expect back then? Everyone can agree that Gladion comes off as intimidating, and yeah, I was a little frightened when he scolded me, but I also can’t help but chuckle at the memory of that brief encounter. Remembering that moment where you looked miserable after Guzma defeated you, and you muttering how lonely you were… I wish I had met you sooner.

I… didn’t think much into visiting here, huh…? Don’t really have anything else to do… My Pokémon are resting back at home for all their hard work, so it’s just me here at the moment. I hesitantly step into the motel lobby.

I’m greeted by the owner with a gentle smile. “Welco— Oh! Champion [y/n]! What brings you here today?” I nod and smile weakly at her. “Hi. I… just wanted to check something in one of your motel rooms. Do… do you remember the blonde boy who had stayed here up until a year ago?” I stand kinda awkwardly as she thinks for a moment. What am I doing? “Oh, him! The boy who stayed here for two years? My, he sure was a mysterious one. Do you know him?” She looks at me curiously. I stammer, “Y-yes. I don’t know if you know, but from when he left, he’s been really busy taking care of his family business elsewhere, and… he also happens to be my boyfriend, ahehe…” The woman’s face lights up and slightly blushes. “Awww young love! I’m happy for you two.” I scratch the back of my head shyly and blush at the statement. “Thank you, I-I guess… Since he’s been so busy… he… he asked me to come here to find s… something for him… something that he may have accidentally left behind when he was staying here.” What kind of stupid request is this? “Is that so?” She asks with slight confusion. “I don’t recall any lost objects in his room after he left, unless I didn’t check properly.”

She offers the key for the room to me. “No one is staying in there at the moment, so you can take a look in there. I trust that you won’t make a mess in there haha!” I grab the key from her hand and nod, “thank you kindly.” Just as I’m about to turn around and walk out, she suddenly says, “um also, you… don’t look too well. Are you feeling okay?” I pause for a moment, a little caught off guard. Before I put any thought into it, I retort, “I… I’m fine, thank you. Just a bit tired from all the matches I’ve been having lately. It’s… also quite hot today so I probably look a little sweaty haha…” Her concerned expression remains unchanged but she replies, “o… okay… I hope you find the lost thing for your boyfriend. Say hi to him for me.” I only nod in response with a weaker smile. Jeez what is wrong with me?

As soon as I close the door behind me, I stumble my way hastily to Gladion’s former room a little too quickly, fumbling the door handle to unlock it, and bust inside before anyone else sees how much of a mess I am right now. The room is silent and empty. Of course it is. I look around slowly yet frantically, feeling slightly light-headed. Is it the heat, or am I just really tired? What… what am I doing here again? My eyes find a mirror to the right of the room, reflecting my pathetic, slouched posture. God I really do look awful.

My head whips to the bed in front of me. My body automatically flops upon it, slightly bouncing, face first. I groan loudly. I’m such an idiot. I peak one eye to lazily look around the room again. Looks slightly dusty in here. Seems like no one has been here for a while, yet I kinda feel at home. I’m already engulfed by the scent of the bed. Is it just me, or does it smell like him? Am I going crazy? He hasn’t been here it’s been a year of course it’s clean and not fresh with his scent.

I feel a bit more calm as the scent throws me into a trance. I unconsciously release a moan as my hands grip the sheets tightly. It’s like his scent has fully enraptured me. God, I’m hopeless. I tear up, kicking my sandals off my feet and bringing my legs close to me. I don’t care that I’m messing up the sheets at this point. I miss him so fucking much. Before I know it, one of my hands is deep under my shorts and underwear, feeling myself. Not only am I wet with tears but squirming out of horniness. His scent is intensifying the sensation. “Fuck,” I whimper, picking up the pace with my rubbing, “G-Gladion…”

I continue to play with my clit for a few minutes, when I hear creaking from a few rooms down outside. I jolt up and quickly rub my hand dry on my shirt. Crap, my shorts look slightly damp. Hope it just looks like sweat. The door creaks ajar as an oh-too-familiar face peaks from behind it. I briefly freeze in place, gawking at the surprise visitor. He opens the door slowly as he stumbles inside with slight hesitation and possibly shame in his eyes. I suddenly bolt towards him, almost tackling him against the wall as I throw my arms around him in the tightest embrace.

“GLADION! WHAT THE FUCK!” I cry out, sobbing into his shirt. He has one hand rubbing my back and the other caressing my head. He mumbles into my hair, “I’m so sorry, [y/n]. I… don’t think I can give you a good enough of an explanation for being away from you for so long…” I look up at him, feeling like a complete mess but finally whole again, my vision blurry with my overflowing tears. I fight the urge to slap him for making me feel this way, feeling internally destroyed to see how guilty and tired his own face looks. I dig my fingers into his scalp and grumble, “I’m… sorry too… for overreacting like this…” I shove my face into his chest again, engulfing his actual scent this time, “I… I just missed you so fucking much.” He embraces me tighter, stuttering, “you have every right to react this way. I decided to stay away from you so I could focus on my work, yet somehow we still found our way to each other again.”

I pull away and grab his hands, looking up at him again. “Why… why are you here…?” He grasps my hands tenderly and replies, “Wicke forced me to take a day off, and I found myself not knowing what to do, so my only idea was… to come back to where I kinda first started… dunno if that sounds weird…” His thumb rubs onto mind, looking a bit off to the side nervously. I stare blankly for a moment, then giggle, “hehe, funny enough… me too actually… I also have the day off today and didn’t know what to do. Next thing I knew, I found myself wandering here in hopes I could… see you?” Gladion stares back, wide-eyed for another moment, then chuckles, “well… what a turn of events.” We both laugh nervously but happily, and embrace each other once more. It feels like it’s been such a long time since either of us have been this happy, despite how stupid this situation is.

I tug his hand as I guide him to sit beside me on the bed. We stare at each other in awe, feeling kinda refreshed for the first time in what seems like in ages. “So… how’s everything at the foundation?” I ask, slightly swinging my legs back and forth. “Things have been really busy and strenuous, of course. However, I think I’ve gotten kind of a good hang of operations now,” Gladion explains as he briefly looks off into the distance, “and better news — from what I heard from Lillie, she’s only been getting much stronger as a trainer, and mother’s recovery has been going really well,” he rambles with excitement in his eyes, which I can only adore helplessly. “I’m glad things are getter better for you,” I say with a smile. He looks back at me, “…how about you?”

My body gets fluttery all over from the sight of his cute face. God how I missed seeing it, it drives me crazy in love sometimes. “Still going strong as champion!” I smile widely as I playfully flex one of my arms, “there’ve been some tough battles, sure, but I’m still the best! Although, I’m curious if you’ve thought up of some new battle tactics yourself, President Gladion.” His face flushes but he can’t help but beam proudly for me and remarks, “[y/n], you know that I don’t like to be called president… but that’s my champion. As expected of you to remain undefeated.” We’re both grinning from ear to ear as we intertwine our fingers. His face suddenly drops as he looks down and lifts our hands off the bed. “Why is it… slightly damp here…?”

Shit. I quickly retract my hand in a panic. My face heats up more. “Um… um you know how miserable I was b-before? Yea, yea, I was… laying here, sobbing like a baby f-from how much I was missing… you…” Gladion stares at me in confusion, retorting, “but… you were sitting right here, and… wouldn’t your head have been on the pillow…?” More panic. My eyes constantly dart between his face and my knees as I ball my hands upon my legs. I can’t think of any other explanation…

“You… you know as teenagers, w-we start feeling particular emotions w-we didn’t feel as kids? Y-you know, puberty and hormones and s-s-stuff…” I stutter uncontrollably. It clicks in his mind almost immediately, evident as his eyes widen and the red in his face deepens. We both look away, equally as embarrassed. God just kill me already. I avoid eye contact with him as we sit in silence for what feels like an eternity. Eventually, I stand up and start making my way to the door. “It was really stupid of me to have come here in the first place I’m so sor—“

Gladion grabs my wrist. I look back, slightly teared up with shame. He has a serious look in his eyes, staring deeply into mine but still blushing furiously. “Are… those feelings still there…?” His rasp voice huffs. My face couldn’t be any hotter. He couldn’t look any hotter. Fuck. I only slightly nod in response. His voice hitches, “d-do… do you want… me… to relieve those feelings for you…?” My face gets hotter. We stand there for another moment in silence. I nibble my lower lip and nod again.

He pulls me slowly onto his lap as we both sit on the bed again. His hot breath tickles my skin as I look down into his emerald orbs. “You… aren’t the only one who’s been feeling these sorts of feelings, you know…” He caresses my face with one hand and grabs my ass with the other, “I also touch myself when I can’t get you out of my head.” My mouth slightly waters and my heart starts to race tenfold. “And now that we’re together for the first time in ages, I feel like this is the only chance I can have you all to myself.” The fiery sensation overwhelms my whole body again, and I purr, “I’m all yours, President.”

Our mouths latch upon each other, where neither of us hold back any of the hunger that’s been stirring up from the past few months. Our tongues claim every inch of each other’s caverns while our hands slither tenderly yet clamber desperately along each other’s forms. My straddling core shifts rhythmically upon his hardening member, making him grunt and making me moan, soon pulling away to gasp for air. Our hot breaths mix as a thin string of saliva drips on his chin. One of my hands is tangled in his bangs, while the other is raked in his scalp. Our chests heave heavily, foreheads touching. My vision is hazy but I’m still entranced with his orbs.

I sit up to lay on the bed upon my back, dragging him down with me. My hands fall back on both sides of my head, and my legs lay flat with my knees tight together. His aroused expression becomes more nervous and embarrassed, but still huffing with hunger. He hastily slips his shoes off, then pins his hands by my head, legs apart while kneeling with my legs between them. A different kind of tension overcomes the room.

“Um… this… is my first time,” Gladion mumbles, eyes slightly shaky. I bite my lower lip, stammering, “m-me too. I t-trust you with all my heart though. Just… be gentle…” His throat swallows with a big gulp. Slouched over me, he slowly tugs the straps of my top down over my shoulders, revealing my bra. I almost bring my hands inward to cover myself, suddenly feeling ten times more self-conscious. He slightly retracts his hands, also self-conscious about what he’s doing. Fuck my heart is beating like crazy! I take in a deep breath before I awkwardly reach behind me with both of my hands to unlatch my bra strap. His hands lower again to slowly shift the bra up to reveal my bare breasts. I swear, our faces couldn’t be any redder at this point. His hands cramp up, and we freeze for another moment. My breath hitches to break the silence, murmuring, “y-you can do a-a-anything to them…”

Gladion takes in another big gulp, and leans down slowly. His clammy hand hovers over one breast for a moment, then grabs it as gently as possible. A small squeal escapes my lips, making us both jolt in place. I suddenly stutter, “It’s ok! They’re really sensitive, b-but you can keep going.” He briefly sucks in his lips and nods, before proceeding to massage it. Oh my god this feels completely different from when I touch myself holy shit! I attempt to muffle my audible delight as he plays with it more, fascinated by its soft touch. He soon grazes a thumb over my stiff peak, making me release another squeal. With curiosity in his gaze, he starts fondling it, and his other hand grabs my other breast with more enthusiasm. My hips squirm more, as I fail to repress a gasp. My skin is tingling from his hot breath, burning as his eyes examine my hard buds as his fingers fondle them more roughly.

He finally takes it into his mouth, sending a whole new, electrifying sensation throughout my body. FUCK! He sucks it rhythmically, picking up the pacing with his other hand. My whole body is a squirming mess, and I stop trying to hold my moans in. My hand holds the back of his head as he licks my bud frantically. “Yes, yes! That’s it! G-Gladion!!” I gasp with delight. He quickly switches to my other breast to eat it up like there’s no tomorrow, other hand crazily playing with the freshly sucked breast. I’m practically hyperventilating, as my grip tightens in his scalp. In between licks and sucks, he sloppily growls, “I fucking love how you say my name!”

Without a warning, my lower back arches violently as my essence leaks from my shorts. Gladion pulls away, as I quiver and pant uncontrollably, my vision hazy again. “I… I… I j-just came,” I whimper, “b-but… I want you… inside of me.” He’s speechless, now less red with a new sense of confidence written in his face, but still nervous as hell. I push myself up to remove my top and bra, as he sits there, still in a daze. “But first,” I mutter, tugging his shirt as I eat him with my eyes, “I also want to see you… undressed…”

Gladion’s face suddenly drains, looking down to the floor for a moment. “Uh… okay… j-just for you… but just so you know,” he looks back at me hesitantly, “my body isn’t a-anything impres—“ “I don’t care about how you look!” I retort, grabbing his shoulders with reassurance. “I love you, no matter how vulnerable you may feel. No one is perfect. As I said, I trust you with all my heart. I… just hope you return those feelings…” He cups my face to kiss my forehead, then mutters, “O-of course I do… I’m… just nervous…”

Trying not to hesitate, he slowly pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it to the floor, revealing his lean form. I stare in awe. I know that he’s a bit self-conscious about how pale he is… but he’s brave for doing this… He looks into my eyes again, mumbling, “now that I’ve seen your breasts, you… probably want to see my… dick… right?” I nod almost way too enthusiastically, feeling my face flush and my heart racing again. “J-just to see and… maybe t-touch… I can s-s-suck it another time…” I stammer, hands tightening into fists on my knees.

His eyes widen, and an unexpectedly huge smile spreads upon his face as he suddenly pulls me into a tight hug. “Fuck! Stop being so cute my heart can’t take it!” My whole body goes limp as I watch him swing his legs off the bed to unfasten his pants. Pulling them off, only in his underwear now, it was now visibly obvious how hard he is. I quickly cover my mouth with the back of my hand. “Fuck” is all I mutter. I’m already hard again. With hunger in his eyes, he remarks, “make it quick so I can get inside of you.” Before I can even process how hot he sounded, he finally pulls off his underwear, his member springing out with a slight bounce, with a few droplets of pre-cum dripping from its head.

Now I’m the once who’s fascinated. Although I can’t see Gladion’s face as I take a closer look at it, I can sense him burning up from this sudden exposure. He reaches over to the dresser next to the bed as I stroke it, making him shudder. I snap out of my entrancement when I hear him tearing a packet open. The serious fire from earlier is in his eyes again as he stammers, “y-you can’t play with it today, but you can put this on f-for me.” I can only gawk as he hands the condom to me and stands his boner upwards. Not at what he’s holding, but just over the situation we’re about to get into…

I take a deep gulp as I place the condom on top and roll it on. I lay on the bed again, nodding to invite him to remove my shorts for me, which he does with ease. He desperately removes my soaked underwear and spreads my legs open, briefly examining my lips as I part them with my fingers. I gasp, unable to hold back my excitement. No more foreplay — I want to feel you inside me right now. He positions his member and slowly sinks it into my entrance. We both moan loudly, then he mutters, “fuck it’s so tight and hot! I’m already so close!” I pant heavily, “me too…” I intertwine my fingers with his on both sides of my head, “you… can start slow… then pick up the pace when you can’t hold it in anymore.”

Gladion nods and starts to thrust very slowly. I’m struggling to keep my eyes open while the fire in my core consumes me, but now I can truly see how his eyelashes flicker shut, his lips parted while huskily breathing, sweating but flushing with passion — my fantasies of him pale in comparison to his actual aroused expression. As he huffs heavily, I moan melodically, “holy shit you feel so good!” The pace of his thrusting gradually picks up, increasing the volume of my moans, and our clammy hands grip even tighter. “I love you so fucking much, [y/n]!” He growls into my ear, sending sensations from my face to my bucking groin. “Keep saying my name, I fucking love it!!” I gasp monstrously, wrapping my legs around his hips as the other end of his cock frantically rams into my ass. The euphoric ecstasy reaches its highest peak as he slams into me for the last time, making us scream each other’s names almost simultaneously. I feel it spasm inside me as he almost collapses upon me. We gasp loudly for air, my eyes scrunched with only stars in my vision. Holy… shit…

After Gladion collects his breath, he slowly pulls out and turns us both over to lay on our sides. The bed is soaked in sweat, and our lower areas are drenched with my essence, but neither of us care. He stares at me dreamily and whispers with a smirk, “well… did I relieve your feelings…?” I sloppily link my arm with his and giggle, “no shit you did hehe… you being here was enough but you really brought it all… must be a new tactic you came up with.” He chuckles and brushes stray hairs from my sweaty face, seemingly satisfied with his work.

Other than the sexual tension we had, it seems like neither of us can take the actual heat anymore as we roll on our backs away from each other, laughing. We lay in silence for yet another moment, when I’m struck with another dumb idea. “What if… we stayed here for the night…?” I suggest, turning my head to look back at Gladion. He pouts as he thinks about it, then turns his head to me and says, “fuck it why not? Who’s gonna stop the most powerful people of Alola?” We laugh again.

Eventually, we both get up clumsily to clean ourselves off in the bathroom. We then decided to hang out until evening, and have our first sleep together without a care in the world. We can deal with the mess we made in the morning anyway…

As the bottom right text says, Forgive my horny ass idk whether to be proud (of these drawings) or ashamed (fucking a fictional character)

#gladion #pokemon sun and moon #gladion x reader #gladion headcanons #smut #my text #buronzuwyngzu doots

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wikiangela · 4 months

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Hiiii Vicki, I'm super curious about the alive shannon fic, i need to know moreee

hiii!! aaahh, alive shannon my beloved baby <3

it's been way too long since I posted a snippet, but all of them are here

it's probably my most self-indulgent fic that I'm the most excited about, but also the most nervous about haha

just for the record: it's going to be buddie, obviously, it's just gonna focus heavily around shannon, too - it's actually alternating pov between shannon, eddie and buck - by chapter tho, I don't like switching povs mid-chapter haha

the idea started bc I was tired of the discourse and hate on Shannon (which I saw all over again when they mentioned her in s6) bc she doesn't deserve it, and since I first watched the show I always just felt so bad for her - so I started to think about her a lot, and since then the idea was just growing and growing until I finally started writing a few months ago!

it's kinda a rewrite of canon, where everything more or less happens, except shannon survives the accident, she and eddie get divorced and learn how to be friends and co-parents, and buck's not sure where he fits into it until he and shannon also become friends, and he's co-parenting with both of them like he does with eddie in canon

(also, while she's recovering from the accident, she stays with eddie - he insisted - and then when buck's recovering from the bombing, he's also gonna stay with eddie - eddie insisted lol - he likes to take care of the people he loves okay 😂)

it's kind of a challenge bc I don't know how to write buddie dynamic in s2 (I mean, they were always *like that* but it hasn't been this intense then lol) bc my rewatch isn't going well haha - and also writing them fall in love, instead of already in love and oblivious, is also new to me so it's gonna be fun to figure out haha

rn I'm finishing chapter 3, which is when the ladder truck bombing happens, but it's such a mess full of notes and comments and highlights I can barely look at the doc, but already started cleaning it up! so more snippets coming soon!

here's one more tiny snippet I'm not sure if I shared already, from chapter 2 (which is shannon's pov) after they told chris that she's gonna stay with them just for a little while, while trying and failing to postpone the divorce talk (they don't know what they're doing and neither do I haha)

“Why won’t you just live with us?” Christopher looks up at her with those curious eyes, identical to hers, but the frown on his face makes him look so much like Eddie. There’s so much of both of them in him – obviously, he’s their kid, it just hits her all over again sometimes, that they made this incredible little human. If there’s one good thing that came out of their relationship, it’s Christopher. “Are you and dad breaking up again?” “Oh.” Eddie exhales softly. Yeah, Shannon gets it. She hoped whatever was happening between them over the last few weeks, the sneaking around, sex, kissing, I-love-yous, falling back into a relationship, or trying to – that they hid it well from him, trying to figure it out between them before telling Chris anything. But, well, their kid is smart and perceptive, and of course he’s noticed something. Or maybe it’s just the fact that she came back into their lives, and they were a family again, and what child wouldn’t think that meant their parents are getting back together?

thank you for the ask! <3 (sns it's so long, it's my most beloved fic and I could ramble on and on about it haha)

ask me about my wips <3

#slowly getting out of my slump when it comes to this fic #this is already my favorite thing i've written and it's barely started haha #it's already 20k and i'm only at the ladder truck bombing - i'm hoping to get at least to the shooting haha #the alive shannon fic #wip tag game #ask games #tag games #wikiangela answers #wikiangela writes #buddie fic #my wips #fic snippet #also i barely remember s2 so any major inconsistencies will be cleared up once i finish rewatching lol #(but also im changing some things too obvi)

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agentplutonium · 4 months

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Fic WIPs I want to post in 2024

I wanna hold myself accountable more than anything so here's some fics/concepts I want to write in 2024. I don't know if any of them will get done we'll have to see.

1. Like Real People Do

This is kind of a cheat since I already started it, but I really want to finish this fic in 2024. It has been in progress since last September. I love it it is my child however it is time for this guy to get off of my wiplist. It's already 35 k, and we're still six (+?) chapters away from the end. If any of my wips are getting finished this one is a priority.

2. Biting the Hand That Feeds

This fic I just started last? month? something like that, but where its shorter and I like the concept there is a high chance that I will finish it. It's a Milo/Sweetheart 1920's AU that Dizz introduced me too that I am putting my own spin on. I am actually in love with the concept and I wanna see if I can get that whole "can't be together but like fuck do I care" vibe down since this is the first time that I'm properly writing it ^^

3. Milo/Sweetheart Mafia AU

This one is another one that is probably (hopefully) going to be done sooner rather than later. Veau actually handed me this concept attached to Copacabana (at Copa) by Barry Manilow and I am so excited to play with it. The song in general fascinates me, I liked it before now but I listened again a few nights ago while we were talking about it and really listened to the lyrics and it has such a fascinating story it tells. I haven't picked out the themes I would be writing JUST yet (I just started developing it on the 24th) but there's probably gonna be something there.

4. My Tank fic that is based on songs from Stick Seasons (We'll All Be Here Forever) by Noah Kahn

This one is pretty self-explanatory, but the concept fascinates me. Ever since that album came out I have never been able to detach it from Tank no matter how hard I try. So, the natural response is to write a fic until I hate myself (/lh/j). It would revolve around the relationship that Tank & Milo/Sweetheart would have before, during, and after Quinncident/Darlin moving away. This one has themes of different connections on person can have, and how those connections can age as someone grows up and changes, and what its like to navigate someone returning after so long and changing so much.

5. My SpiderSneaks AU

this is just me indulging in my other hyper-fixations. In this fic, I'd be taking the plot of The Amazing Spider-Man and twisting it to fit into Milo/Sweetheart. I forget what other details I have, but it's a concept I've been sitting on for a while. I'm just obsessed with spiderman guys that's really the only reason this exists. However I would love to write out themes of the struggle between purpose and love/happiness. I feel like that's a fitting thing to imbed into a spiderman au that doubles as a milo/sweetheart fic. The two of them are easily put into that "must do good" role, and their relationship seems to balance that out a little bit, but I kinda want to play with it in regards to Sweetheart.

6. The Milo/Sweetheart intimacy fic. (the one talked about in this post. )

This kinda ties into me pushing my aspec!Sweetheart agenda, but the idea of writing a fic that shows the intimacy and love these two share without defaulting to a sexual encounter is so fascinating to me. I would put SO MUCH into that fic guys you don't understand. I need it. It's not even "oh this would be cool to write" its "I NEED to write this to satiate my soul."

I do have other wips I want to work on but they're smaller and will probably act as buffers between the bigger ones. I hope I can get most of them done, especially the unfinished fics because I hate having unfinished projects. However there are themes I would love to explore in the not started ones that might convince me to start writing it ^^

#pluto's fic list - 2024 #guys im actually really excited to write some of these and show you #cause theres always so much that goes behind these thing #its like literally so cool to me #plutonium_rambles

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chunky-ruckus · 1 year

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I'm probably going to remove this chapter from Itty Bitty- it just doesn't fit- but I like it well enough to save. I'm keeping it here, on my OC blog, and I'm not sure if I should put it back on ao3 as something else? An outtake of some sort? Generally I hate getting rid of my writing / making it inacessable to others. Lmk I guess, it's just kinda.... Self indulgent bs anyway (not in a bad way) lol

___

Another morning.

More and more, you believe you were destined to die on Alt-

Aaah, wait a minute. Depression, you sly dog, you think. You almost had me using groundhog’s day as both a metaphor and a plot device. The bitch is good, but you got her number. And you refuse to booty call on this fine, foggy evening.

And it is fine and foggy. The espresso machine gives its awful death gurgle just like every morning, but you can’t see the lonely subgrubs beneath you, and so you get to skip making a new penguin analogy completely. You consider a silent hill analogy, bringing your hand to your chin in deep thought. It’s ten minutes wasted, and 15 hours 50 minutes to go before you can reasonably go to sleep again.

Haha. This sucks, man.

You check your calendar, Maybe you have some more, secret events scheduled? But, save for the lonely event a week ago, there’s nothing.

It occurs to you that you can schedule your own events. And why shouldn’t you? Why shouldn’t you put things in your calendar that you’ve already been doing? As a treat?

Fifteen minutes later. Stelsa would be so proud: your calendar app now has a streak of teal, those days where she’s got you on her calender. You suspect this is a secret plot device that will help you later.

Half an hour down since you woke up. You’re doing this. You’re making today happen.

...You’re staring blankly at your fridge. Which, to be fair, is adorned with pictures that Karako and Wanshi drew for you last time you visited the caverns. It’s so rare to see Karako at all, let alone with the jades.

The picture he drew of himself, protecting you with a psychic aura in pink and purple and your own body sprouting viscera like vines, is shockingly adorable. Wanshi’s companion piece, of her as a mother cat bringing you a piece of her hunt to share with kittycat!you (presumably not dead yet, which is quite a vote of confidence for your constitution) and kittycat!Karako (covered in blood and smiling one of those anime emoji smiles), is a bit more horrifying.

Ten more minutes down.

You sigh. You know it’s up to you to get into some antics, some real shenanigans if you’re lucky, but your inspiration well is dry and frankly the Alternian dim season is fucking bleak. You’ve noticed more trolls lately are indulging in their violent tendencies. Everyone is moody and dark circles are more likely to be black eyes these days.

It’s going to be a long day.

It’s 1:30 when your pho- er, palmhusk starts buzzing.

You almost don’t recognize the sound over the humming of your fridge. How’s this for beating depression? You’re deep cleaning. Thinking about future meals. Considering a walk, even. Who’s doing it like you?

Shit. The palmhusk is still going hog fucking wild on your counter.

It occurs to you that you very rarely hear palmhusks buzz on this planet. In fact, you’ve set yours to do not disturb mode. You close the fridge- oops, you left the bottle of cleaning spray Marsti lent you- and check your phone.

Marvus is requesting to facetime. And here you were, thinking you’d have to come up with your own stupid bullshit for today.

You slide the little button around on screen until you manage to answer.

“Ayooo,” he says, hair fanning around his shoulders- excluding his forelock, wrapped up in a little pink curler- as he reclines upside down on a bubblegum pink chaise. “Lunch time, baby, you ate yet?” He picks his teeth as if to sharpen them, readying himself for his own lunch. The muscles and tendons on his slender neck stand out like the waving arms of a crowd; it's mostly disconcerting, a little bit alluring.

“Already?” You knew it was after midnight, but connecting the dots of what time is it and when do you do the things that keep you alive is a bit beyond you right now. Your stomach rumbles. “I guess it is. No, I didn’t eat yet.”

“Real shit,” Marvus says. “Pick up whatever you want and bring it here.”

“I have,” you say, no shame left after the events of friendmageddon, “no money.”

“Yeah no shit,” Marvus twists his face at you, “but I got cash comin’ out both ends, babe. Catch me shitting singles.” Sounds like terrible news for the next stripper Marvus hires. “Catering place ain’t delivering today," they definitely are, "and my roadies are all setting up R N.” Oh, you hate that. He’s verbally conveying text talk? It would have been the same amount of syllables.

“You’re full of shit,” you say. “If you have so much money, buy some more guys to do your chores for you.” Your tone is only harsh in a playful sense, but you can’t help but laugh.

“Money can’t buy good company,” he says, winking. Leaning upside down has leant his face a boyish charm: all of what little fat he carries on his face has gravitated to his cheeks, and you can see a faint purple tint to his ears and hairline that shows he’s either blushing or about to faint from a head-rush. You can hear his heels thumping against the wall. A few trolls in the background are banging an accompanying beat onto what sounds like a table covered in plastic beads. Then Marvus’s face gets all mock-serious, too much squinting smile in his eyes to really scare you. “Man, hurry tha fuck UP if you’re tryna snack.”

“Send me a lift,” you say.

“Sheeeeesh,” he says, squinting his eyes, biting his lip, and bringing his L shaped fingers to his chin. “We love a gold digger.”

His eyes are starting to un-focus. Good, you hope he passes out in a silly little heap at your feet. Jerk. Clown. Asshole. You sigh affectionately.

“I’m serious. My whip,” you say, watching Marvus close his eyes and smile dreamily at your vernacular, “is outta gas.”

“Well my whip,” you watch him tap something on his palmhusk screen and nearly piss your pants when you hear a clown horn rendition of La Cucaracha horn right outside your window, “is already there.” When you look outside, some huge bug is scuttling horribly up the cliffside. Oh, the buggy- scuttle- scuttlebuggy? It looks like a vintage volkswagon, but stupid and with iridescent green-shifting-purple wings for doors. It’s carrying a pair of pink fuzzy dice in its... Grill? That seems to be the appropriate word: the gold plated mandible brings to mind both gold plated teeth and also the front of a car.

“It’s already paid for. Get ya’self something good,” Marvus says. Then he just hangs up on you.

Well. Beats deep cleaning your kitchen. Then again, your fridge can’t hang up on you.

Think of the devil, you hear something explode inside your fridge. You do not want to know.

You grab your coat and jump out of the window, towards Marvus’s scuttlebuggy.

“Too late, lapachka!”

A huge clown in a striped shirt stops you at the door to the green room.

Another clown, half his size and with a half-shaved head, peeks her head from around him. “Don’t twist your willy, Silly, that’s Marvus’s-”

Marvus’s what, you’ll never be sure- maybe just Marvus’s, period- because yet another clown pushes her aside and stares down at the catering you’ve got stacked in your hands, mouth rounded and hands-to-cheeks in a delighted expression that only a clown could pull off.

“Marvus’s food, Mimz, back off.” Oh. You hope you aren’t included in that category. This stern clown is smaller than the other two, but is able to push them back into the green room.

The big guy- Silly?- sticks a sucker into his mouth and winks at you. “Za moe zdorov'e,” he says around the sweet.

The other, mime themed one- Mims?- reaches forward like a lover in a movie, desperate for a bite. You hope, for the second time that night, you aren’t a tasty treat for some clown cannibal.

“You know how he gets when he’s hungry.” The stern one pouts at them both, hands on her hips.

The clown signs something, and they all laugh.

“That’s soooo funny,” says the stern one, in a weird affectation of a valley girl accent, tilted slightly towards bored.

“He’s so-” starts Silly, but steam starts coming out of his nose, and he sighs, sucking harder on the sucker.

The mime signs something at you, raising one brow.

“She’s asking if you’re here to eat,” says the stern one, a suggestive lilt to her tone.

“You think so?” says Silly. God, you can’t get a word in edgewise. And here you were, clowning for free. These guys are clearly professionals. “Maybe he wants an audience of one tonight.” He is no more endearing for his thick, russian-adjacent accent. You bristle. The clowns are laughing.

“The food is mine, actually,” you say, because you love getting killed with extreme prejudice by clowns.

The stern one smiles at you, nudging affectionately. “Sure,” she says. “So you aren’t sharing, zaychik?” She pouts. It's adorable, in the same way that a cougar is adorable until it GETS you.

The mime signs, puffing out her cheeks and pouting.

“We all paid something to be here,” Silly translates through a mouth of marshmallow.

They all look at you as one. You suspect they are only telling a half truth here. For the bit.

And you’re the punchline.

Silly comes back towards you. “Go,” he says, sticking the sucker in your mouth. It’s covered in saliva, but you can’t seem to spit it out. “Enjoy the show. Eat later.”

They slam the door behind you. You can hear the tearing of cheap takeout boxes, laughter, and the loud screaming of “bad ideas through this door: three for one special.”

Well, fuck.

You suck on the lollipop. As you exhale, you notice your breath is warmer, wetter. Steam leaves your nose and gathers around your ears. It's the very physical representation of a bad idea.

Well, why not roll with it? You are hungry for more than just lunch now. Although a quick rolling rumble in your stomach reminds you that lunch was your primary objective.

Damn Marvus. If you don't get your lunch, you're gonna... you're going to....

Well, you'll deep clean his green room and he'll never feel comfortable again.

A team of blue blooded body guards, suits bursting at the seams, stand guard in front of the stage entrance. So that's not the way. They wiggle and jiggle in your vision; low blood sugar must be making you dizzy.

So. You sigh. You're sneaking in. To one of Marvus's concerts.

And you didn’t even bring your concert diaper.

“Za moe zdorov'e,” you mimic the sound of Silly’s words, sucking sugar, and then you’re pushing your way into the crowd, steam surrounding you.

The guards don’t even try stop you.

You stumble in slow motion through a crowd made of 2-d people. It's like you can see the secret workings of Alternia: all of these trolls are just paper puppets on a string. You follow the lights: all leads to behind Marvus's head.

He is so beautiful. You're struck by him. His smiling face. His easy stage presense. And, to top it off, shawty got the flatty. He looks less flat than the crowd; you suspect his lighting crew is just that good.

All in all, being in the crowd is just like last time. But this time, you're the weird part.

You muscle- a strong word for looking letting trolls see you cry and spooking the hell out of them- your way through towards the front. A girl with succulents in her hair bumps you. Her face drip, drip, drips and sloughs off her skull and into your hair. You wear her face like a mask. Everything is horrible.

The crowd pushes and pulls you. There’s blood fucking everywhere. It gets in your nose. It gets in your mouth. You chew it; it tastes like paper.

God damn it. You started this day rejecting your own groundhog’s day scenario, and look where it’s gotten you. You should have crafted a fucking penguin analogy.

There’s not too much you can do, really, except for hang on to the barrier once you reach it, fighting for your fucking life. You don’t even see the way back, that little path of destiny that led you out here.

You’ve been here before; you think it's a little poetic that the first and- what is becoming more and more likely- the last time you meet Marvus is in his stupid River of Dyx.

The only difference is that the longer the show goes on, the more disoriented you get. You’ve been intoxicated on Alternia before, and you're pretty sure you’re intoxicated once again. The fact that you keep confusing people for plants is a pretty big point in your theory's favor.

It’s got to be the sucker. Or maybe clown saliva is hallucinogenic. Either way, you’re feeling like the sucker now.

And you didn’t even get lunch out of this deal. You’re doing your best to emote a little frowny face above your head so that everyone knows your displeasure.

People are definitely crowding you, as if enough pressure can shrink your stomach. Fold it over itself and make you feel less hungry.

Yes. It's working. You emote a little thumbs up emoji. Nobody is watching you, though, now that you're at the front.

Marvus.

Marvus sings sweetly on stage, his mouth wide and teeth glittering, but you can barely hear him over the screaming of several thousand, bloodthirsty teens. And two saguaros singing operatic scales. Why is singing so much like screaming? The lights lower and frame his head like a halo, and you’re lulled to drowsiness.

When you open your eyes again, it’s in a sea of cacti and corpses.

You want to scream, but you are already screaming. And so is everyone else, even the corpses.

You don’t know how it happens. If it’s even real. Marvus floats down from the stage like an angel and into the crowd's embrace like a lover. He doesn't cross the barrier. He holds his hand out to you, but you can't move to take it. You're drooling.

You’re floating. You think you’re crowdsurfing, which should be impossible. You’re dead, aren’t you? All the rest of those trolls are.

“I’m dead,” you say, testing the waters. Nobody reacts, or seems to care at all.

Marvus does that thing. The whole well what have we got here LOL etc etc. Just like last time. You can barely see his shadow for the light: two more months of stageplay. His stage voice vibrates in his chest, you can almost feel it in your own sternum. Buzzing like purring.

You wish that whoever was running your life would use a different plot device. Groudhog’s day is so cliche. It’s getting old.

But, so it goes. He's going to go for the kill again. But this time, you-

There's no starstruckness this time: you’re genuinely afraid. You don’t want to double die on Alternia. You didn’t want to die at all.

The canesword comes towards you. You grab him by the wrist, but he’s so strong and you’re so out of it that it means nothing. So you flinch-

The canesword stabs you in the shoulder. It hurts like hell. Bone grinds against metal. You pull it out and you bleed all over his shiny, waxed stage. How will he dance with his shoes slick with his blood? When did you get on stage?

“Thought this thing,” you say, groggily, “was a stage prop.”

Marvus’s face is stark raving naked in front of you. Eyes wide, mouth frowning and agape. Shocked.

But he recovers quickly, turning towards the crowd again. He brings the canesword to his mouth and, in what would be corny in a porno, licks your blood from the tip. With a wink and everything. How are you even friends with him. People are screaming. You can only hear the rumbling of his voice in his chest. You just fall uselessly to the ground again. It's all you've got.

When you open your eyes, the world is lit up in black-light and neon paint, all in dizzying stop motion. Two dimensional people on a two dimensional backdrop.

All but Marvus, who is staring at you, frowning in more dimensions that you can interpret. He is so beautiful, slender of jaw and wide of mouth. White knuckled grip on his canesword. Hair so perfect from the ghost of a single, pink curler. His eyes are bright, wild. He's frowning through a smile.

He holds his hand out to you.

You, whether you want to or not, go to him. He grabs you softly by each hand, kissing the backs of them.

"I could take care of you," he whispers. Just for you. "When it all goes to shit, you know? You make my kokoro go doki-doki and shizz." Corpse flowers and roaches bloom from the bodies beneath the stage, now decomposing. "Phee-ew," Marvus plugs his nose. "Ain't that something? Take a fuckin whiff, babe."

He shoves a corpse flower into your face and your whole world goes black.

___

You wake up when water fucking drenches you.

Marvus is chewing and singing softly; you turn to look at him. He sings: “I said it must be ‘cause a,” then he chews and hums through the word, scrolling on his phone, “got dough. Extraordinary swag and a mouth full of-” he pops the last bite of food in his mouth, still humming, then juggles a water balloon and throws it at the wall above you.

“Mouth full of what,” you say, unamused and soaking wet.

His head jerks up. “You up, babe?”

You want to answer, but you’re too busy coughing and choking on what tastes like your own blood and tap water.

“Daayyyum, shawty!” Marvus says, doing that stupid fuckboy lip bite again. When you don't smile, he rips a piece of meat apart, grabs a pinch of rice, and shoves it into your mouth. “Mouth full of that.”

His thumb brushes your lip; you had no idea his skin was so oily. You wonder if he's been picking food up off the floor and eating it with his fingers. He wipes some sauce from your lip, and then sticks his thumb into your mouth. You tongue the last bit of rice from the whorls of his finger tip, some sauce from under his nail. A hint of his sweat accompanies the flavors of what is unmistakably chinese food.

He feeds you like that for a while. There are no cameras. Your head is pounding. He wipes your mouth for you every so often after you cough and the napkin is stained red.

His voice is soft when he speaks next, shoving a piece of orange chicken into your mouth. “Gotta get better at lying, bud.”

“Lying?” You ask through your mouth full of food.

He shrugs, taking his own bite of orange chicken. He’s holding his chopsticks all fucked up; it’s a miracle any food makes it to his mouth. “Killed you that first time ‘cause you was dying, dog. Killed you this time ‘cause you lied.”

“You’re really bad at killing me,” you say. His mouth twitches, but he doesn’t smile. He pinches your cheeks, forcing your mouth open, and sticks the bite meant for him into your mouth. His mouth is bigger than yours; it's an ordeal to chew and swallow. What a way to tell you to shut up.

“Guess so,” he says, putting his chopsticks down. He’s resolutely not looking at your face. His gaze is fixated on your shoulder. “All lies got a little bit of truth in ‘em, though.” He rubs the ruined, bloody fabric of your shirt between his thumb and forefinger. It's so ginger that you want to interpret it as shy.

You shrug his hand away and- ah, shit, you’re still bleeding pretty bad. His bubblegum pink couch is a mess of your blood.

“What about you?” You ask, unable to tear your gaze away from his dilated pupils. The grain of rice stuck to his lip. “That guy on stage, how much truth is there in that?” You reach out-

“Lot of truth in that,” he says, wiping the grain of rice away with his thumb. Sticking it into his mouth and chewing thoughtfully. He doesn’t elaborate, and you don’t ask.

“This is just like our first meeting,” you say, but it comes out flat.

“Nah,” Marvus says, offering you the box of beetle and broccoli. You decline. “Totally different. Now, you know what I'm all about.”

It’s a very sweet thing to say. Marvus seems to think so too, because he fucks it up immediately. “Now we’re tight. We’re buds. Ain’t we?”

“Oh,” you say. “Yeah. Dope.” You try for a winning smile, but Marvus isn’t having it.

“Sure didn’t act like it out there, though.” Oh, god, he’s honest-to-god pouting at you. He sticks a beetle into his mouth. It crunches. Sickening.

“Marvus,” you say, just as testy. “I don’t even know what was happening. Also I am bleeding so profusely. Oh, god, wait,” horror fills you. It couldn’t be real, could it? “Marvus.” You sit up, clutching on to your shoulder. “Do I make your kokoro go doki-doki?”

"Do I make your what-ero go who what now?" He gives you a scrunched-up look, confused.

Oh, thank god.

“Never mind,” you say, laying back down. If your blood won’t remain in your body, by god you are going to let your body remain on his couch.

“Guess you was a lil confused before, huh?” He says, suddenly understanding. He pulls something off your pants... Oh, the stick to the sucker. You chewed off some of the paper, making the world’s shittiest, most useless shank. “Without me?” He pouts, but this time it's so fake you could see yourself laughing about it.

But, frankly, you’re still feeling testy. Does he not care that you’re bleeding out on his couch? That you were drugged? Kicked out of his greenroom that he invited you to?

“Friends,” you start, giving him a much more prodigious pout than he gave you. “Keep each other safe.”

“Not on Alternia, they dont.” Marvus’s eyes have gone soft, flitting from you to your shoulder; he flexes his hands, cracking his fingers.

“Well, I thought you would.”

Marvus physically startles at this, looking completely bewildered.

“You said you’d take care of me,” you say, and then you realize that was some kind of drug induced fever dream. “Or, you did in my dream.”

Marvus leans forward, slow and careful. He leans his elbows on his knees and folds his hands together. “Well, ain’t I said all lies got a little bit of truth in them?”

Then he leans in.

He’s smiling, his teeth sharp and glittering. “You been dreaming bout me, babe?”

“Yeah,” you stutter, leaning back. His eyes are on yours, pupils so dilated they’re black.

“And what do you know about me? Ain’t you been taught to be afraid?” His words wash over your face in a humid smog and you can smell his breath: chinese food and something earthy, probably bugs.

You don’t say anything, suddenly still as the wall stops you from backing up anymore.

“You was afraid back then,” his eyes lower to your shoulder, and his lids grow heavy. “When you got stabbed." He drags his hand under his eyes, revealing the purple waters.

“Nice passive voice, asshole. You stabbed me.”

He laughs, bringing his hand up to cover his eyes this time, and then he leans in further.

You think, for a wild moment, that he’s going to kiss you. His fingers come from his eyes to wrap around your head, his thumb stroking your jaw. He looks at you; you close your eyes. His breath is humid against your throat, and then his lips touch the edge of your wound.

It's simultaneously a kiss, and nothing like it. It stings.

His eyes roll up in a characature of ecstasy. He's looking straight at you.

To say you’re shocked is an understatement. You are so out of your element that you can only really roll with it.

He licks you, next, your red blood bright on his bruiseberry-grey tongue. Your breath stutters; it’s a sweet kind of pain, like pressing against a hangnail, or wrapping a bruise.

He hums beneath you. “Like that,” he breathes, and you don’t know if he’s asking or telling or offering, but you nod anyway.

He sighs against the wound, and then wraps his lips around your shoulder, pressing his teeth slightly into your skin.

His other hand has made its way to your waist, and he’s petting you slowly, like you’re his human stim toy. His other hand grabs you behind the shoulder, and he pulls you closer to him, groaning against your skin.

It hurts. It hurts, and it doesn't; it's so bizarre that it manages a horrible, frightening intimacy. His breath is on your skin. He's making noises that you can't inerpret. His fingers comfort. He- there's no better word for it- laps at your blood.

You, for your part, curl around him. Wind the perfect forlock of his hair through your fingers and ruin it. You ruin each other: Marvus gives you anemia, you give him a bad hair day.

With his lips around the gushing wound on your shoulder, he sucks slowly, looking up at you and giving you this shy smile like he’s not sure if you like it.

“Yeah,” you say. The world grows fuzzy at the edges. His eyes close as his tongue hits your skin, and you sigh.

His breath stutters against your neck, then he bites you. So, you pull his hair, hissing.

When he opens his eyes, he smiles again, his show smile. As if you're pulling it out of him. Twinkling on, your little star.

His hair is inhuman beneath your fingers, like very fine wire.

You close your eyes.

"You owe me lunch," you say.

And then you don’t wake up.

#my writing #scraps #itty bitty as in ''if you do it right you'll break their ribs'' btw

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