#the alive shannon fic

[wikiangela]

seven-ish sentence sunday

tagged by @dangerpronebuddie @diazsdimples @underwater-ninja-13 @giddyupbuck 💖

a lil continuation of eddie and shannon's argument from friday's snippet bc after posting it i actually got inspired and unstuck lol (also the fact that they address her leaving and how it affected chris in the episode??? i'm loving it so fucking much!!)

prev snippet

___

“You didn’t talk to your son for two years!” he hissed. “That’s not on me.”

“And you think it wasn’t killing me every second of every day?!” she raised her voice, but still quiet enough to not wake Chris. They had practice at that, unfortunately.

“Didn’t seem like it, with no calls, no texts, nothing to even let us know you’re alive.” he threw his hands out in frustration, the words spilling out of his lips on their own accord. They talked a lot of things out, but they may have left out the ugliest parts and feelings of this whole situation. Eddie hates being the one to bring it all up. But it had to come out eventually.

“Maybe I didn’t think you’d even care!” she fired back. Eddie’s first reaction was shock, because how in the world would Eddie be the one not caring when she’s the one that left? But he took a moment, and remembered that they talked about this, how they both made mistakes, and if he can feel hurt by her behavior, she has as much of a right to be hurt by his. “Maybe I thought that if he didn’t remember me, it’d hurt less that I wasn’t there. That he’d be better off without me.” she shrugged helplessly, a tear escaping her eye, strolling down her cheek.

___

no pressure tags: @elvensorceress @gaydiaz @thebravebitch @silentxxsoul @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @transbuck @911onabc @housewifebuck @watchyourbuck @eowon @loserdiaz @evanbegins @ladydorian05 @wildlife4life @diazpatcher @lover-of-mine @monsterrae1 @thewolvesof1998 @puppyboybuckley @weewootruck @loveyouanyway @spagheddiediaz @rainbow-nerdss @sunshinediaz @epicbuddieficrecs @pirrusstuff @spotsandsocks @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @hoodie-buck @nmcggg @jesuisici33 @exhuastedpigeon @rogerzsteven @hippolotamus @honestlydarkprincess @fortheloveofbuddie @steadfastsaturnsrings @disasterbuckdiaz @tizniz @daffi-990 @theotherbuckley

[bidisasterevankinard]

Tease tidbit Tuesday

Tagged by @ladydorian05 @jeeyuns @daffi-990 @jamespearce9-1-1 @theotherbuckley @transboybuckley

Opened box with old fics again. Meet Mpreg!Buck 5b. But like the begging of the angst

Set in 5x11, but Eddie stayed to prove Buck is his

After Eddie says some stupid joke and Buck bursts into laughter, and then bites his big red lip, Eddie bends down and does something that he will probably regret later, but now he wants to relax and feel the warmth of Buck around him.

He knows Buck feels something for him, but he remembers how all he and Shannon were good at was sex. So he can give Buck a good night. The only thing he can give without breaking them.

Plus, Buck used sex to deal with problems, maybe Eddie can too.

Buck for a second pauses and Eddie is ready to stop and say sorry, but then the man turns his head to make it more convenient and opens his mouth, inviting Eddie. Enjoying the invitation, brown haired puts his tongue in Buck's mouth.

Buck kisses with all his energy and Eddie absorbs it all with a sense of pride, giving Buck no less passion.He devours plush lips how he dreamed since the moment he saw Buck who looked so beautifully and so happy to see him alive. Eddie really was trying hard to understand how he couldn’t see his feelings before he was lying in the puddle of his own blood thinking it was his last moment alive.

Tagging @hippolotamus @eddiebabygirldiaz @malewifediaz @mandzuking17 @monsterrae1 @pirrusstuff @ghostscowboys @giddyupbuck @spagheddiediaz @spaceprincessem @lover-of-mine @spotsandsocks @loserdiaz @thewolvesof1998 @wikiangela @wildlife4life @jesuisici33 @rogerzsteven @rainbow-nerdss @caroandcats @watchyourbuck @honestlydarkprincess @honestlyeddie @hoodie-buck @heartshapedvows @arthursdent @anakinfallen @andrewblur @shortsighted-owl @devirnis @fortheloveofbuddie @callmenewbie @bigfootsmom @bekkachaos @housewifebuck

[try-set-me-on-fire]

@devirnis @eddiebabygirldiaz @rewritetheending @wildlife4life @lover-of-mine @daffi-990 all tagged me for fuck it Friday and I wasn't going to post anything but then as I climbed into bed the opening of a buddie supernatural au popped into my head and then tapped it's way into a google doc. I'm not actually going to write a full fic for this (probably) but sharing this little scrap feels in the nature of this tag game. It's not even Friday anymore so not going to tag anyone unless you, dear reader, see this and feel compelled to share something kicking around in a document somewhere. Fuck it! It's always Friday somewhere (if you forget how days work)! Uhhh canon typical violence warning....

Eddie isn’t a stranger to being called a miracle. A miracle baby, he was; born almost two months early when a ghoul out for revenge had tried to snack on Helena’s gray matter. Neither of them should have survived it, but a few weeks later she brought her little bundle of joy home from the hospital, wailing real loud from his big strong lungs. "It was a miracle you were there, mijo," his father told him when he was six years old and shot a man dead, a man with black eyes who’d broke into the house when he was there alone with Sophia, three years old and screaming, Ramon out on a hunt and Helena at the doctor with the baby. "You’re a miracle worker, Diaz," hunters all over the country have told him with a gritty handshake when he’s helped them put something terrible in the ground. (When Shannon had kissed him under the bleachers for the first time, that had felt like a miracle, too. Her lips were soft and her hands had the same calluses as his, she had the same faint lines across the back of her arm from the testing bite of silver blades. Here was someone who knew, who he didn’t have to lie to, who liked him enough to press all that scarred and unscarred skin together with his. Things fell apart, over and over, in the years after that, but still. That first kiss. Not feeling lonely for maybe the first time ever in his life. Was it not a divine act?) He's 28 when he crawls out of his own grave, dirt clinging to clothes and flesh and coating his mouth, his teeth, stinging his eyes. He stumbles home on wobbly legs like a newborn thing, and maybe he is one, freshly alive as he is. He knocks on his front door however many days it's been since he'd watched his own blood mix with Shannon's on the floor of some old and haunted house — clinging to life long enough to see it start to coagulate because please, god, please, they have a kid at home — and after the holy water and the silver and iron and any other test anyone in the family can think of his abuela takes his face between her hands and weeps “Es un milagro! A miracle! A miracle!”  And in a week, in a barn somewhere outside El Paso, he will learn that this time she is right. 

[neverevan]

☀️ writing patterns ☀️

rules: list the first line(s) of your last 10+1 posted fics and see if there's a pattern!

because we'll all arrive in heaven alive

buddie | 51.4k and counting | Explicit

Thursday, day 5

Buck was still trying to wrap his head around what had happened, it was all so quick; the rain, the debris, the mudslide and then the moment of radio silence before the chaotic explosion of noise.

“We’re not giving up on him.” Bobby had said at the time, but after four days, it has become abundantly clear that instead of a search and rescue, most people have already started to treat this as a recovery mission; except they still haven’t recovered the person who mattered the most.

And When You Speak, Angels Sing From Above

buddie + Shannon centric | 2.8k | Gen

Eddie should’ve seen it coming; the fancy restaurant, the idle evening walk in the city and the arranged sleepover giving them all night to be alone. In his defense, he was blinded by how perfect it all seemed.

Right up to the moment they got home, tangled into each other, rolling along the walls of the hallway, kissing and giggling at the increasingly silly things that Buck kept saying — then, Buck was suddenly gone from his personal space, getting down on one knee in front of him instead, saying words that rang through Eddie’s ears, without their meaning managing to penetrate the walls of his brain.

It didn’t matter.

no harm, no foul

buddie | 4.9k | Mature

The last couple of days felt… Well, honestly, confusing would be the word Buck would use.

The one thing that became clear in the recent weeks, was that he and Eddie were done pretending that there wasn’t something going on between them. (Right after spending at least two months violently dismissing any notion of such an idea, while simultaneously wondering if the other was doing the same. God, they could be really stupid sometimes… Buck was honestly surprised they even made it this far like this.)

Unfortunately, that clarity still left something else much more blurry; their direction.

we’ve got something permanent (i mean in the way we care)

buddie | 7.1k | Explicit

In hindsight, Eddie should’ve seen it coming from a mile away, after the week they’ve had.

It started out by having two days off back to back — which Eddie had planned on using to lay about the house, maybe with some slow make out sessions peppered in, while Chris was at school.

Apparently, Buck had other ideas.

Keep My Heart Warm In Yours

buddie | 18.5k | Mature

The whole thing started with Youtube — as most things do when 12-year-olds are concerned.

Christopher shuffled into the living room with determination, where Eddie was trying to figure out the settings of his new smart TV and Buck was folding and flipping the instruction manual back and forth, trying to find the beginning of it when Chris shoved his phone under his nose.

Of Love, Hospital Jitters And Christmas Lights

buddie | 6.3k | Teen + Up

“MOVE! MOVE! MOVE!” Buck shouted frantically as he pushed past people and ran through the sliding doors leading to the ER.

A nurse ran up to him immediately, waving to people behind herself for help and Buck felt his fingers go numb with fear as he tried to focus on her face.

You Ring, I Drool

buddie | 8.6k | Explicit

Eddie had long realized the resemblance, but it started to become more and more evident lately — and much harder to ignore.

Simply put; Buck was like a dog. In more ways than one.

If This Is What The Season Is Bringing

buddie | 2k | Teen + Up

December 25th 2021

Buck went straight to the fridge after he kicked his door shut. He really needed a beer right about now.

Okay, so Eddie was leaving the 118. Fine.

Well, not fine, nowhere near fine actually.

Out Of Order, Still In Line

buddie | 6.2k | Explicit

Buck could barely believe that today was finally The Day.

After weeks of power outages, paperwork mix-ups, unauthorised appointments and last minute emergencies, Buck finally made it to the Clinic.

And now here he was.

I Was Betting On Forever (But Forever Comes And Goes)

buddie | 4k | Teen + Up

Eddie was startled awake by the forceful ring of his phone.

He reached over to the nightstand blindly with an annoyed huff and pulled the phone off of the charger. He held it above his face, the brightness of the screen making him squint as he read the caller ID.

Unknown Caller.

Coming On Ever So Strong / Coming Off Ever So Soft

buddie | 14.7k | Explicit

Today

Buck didn’t have the best track record when drunk.

That was probably the explanation why his head was pounding like someone was trying to break into his skull with a sledgehammer. And why there was someone pressed up to his side in his own bed.

☀️✨☀️✨☀️

oh I feel so exposed lmao all those pointed single sentence lines dropped in there, just to set the tone are definitely something I swear by... I also use timestamps a lot cuz I love to jump all over the place and then of course there's my dearest friend; in medias res.

I was tagged by the wonderful @jeeyuns @exhuastedpigeon and @wikiangela mwuahhh 💛 and I'm totally no pressure tagging @malewifediaz @spagheddiediaz @daffi-990 @diazsdimples @watchyourbuck and whoever else feels like giving this a go ✨

[chronicowboy]

wrote this on wednesday then promptly forgot about it (thabk @danielsousa for reminding me) but there's like a tiny chance eddie could be trapped in that van with someone so the bones of this fic could still technically apply

Eddie makes it out alive. Again. Somehow.

(Except somehow is 6ft2 and looks a lot like an angel when the last piece of rubble falls away and the light filters into what Eddie had thought would be his grave.)

Eddie makes it out alive, but Joel isn't so lucky.

He had been on a motorbike when the first crash had happened, in critical condition before the bridge had collapsed. It had taken them far too long to extract him from the cluster of cars, and then, when they'd finally gotten him ready to transport, the bridge had swallowed both Joel and Eddie whole.

It had been a long two hours of trying to keep Joel from bleeding out, but eventually he'd lost the fight and the man had taken in one final, wheezing breath before going still.

Now, Eddie's staring into a hospital mirror covered in dust and another man's blood. The bathroom door creaks open, and Buck's reflection appears in the mirror.

"Chim's okay," he offers softly. Eddie squeezes his eyes shut in relief, its the most Buck is going to get out of him. "Maddie's just waiting for him to be assigned a room and then she'll go up and sit with him until he's awake." Buck joins him by the sinks, turning the faucet on and grabbing a wad of paper towels. "Hen and Bobby have been checked out too. Nothing but a few scrapes and bruises. Karen and Athena are looking after them."

Buck picks up Eddie's bloodied hands with a gentleness that makes Eddie want to curl up in a ball, but he lets Buck wipe away the grime on his skin and doesn't think about Maddie with Chimney, Athena with Bobby, Karen with Hen. He catches the bandage peeking out from under Buck's shirt sleeve and his stomach clenches.

"What about you?" he croaks, voice hoarse from begging Joel to stay with him. Buck looks up at him with earnest eyes before following his gaze down to the gauze.

"Oh, that's nothing." Buck shakes his head. "Chim needed a blood transfusion, and..."

"You're a universal donor," Eddie mumbles to himself. Buck nods.

"How are you?" he whispers, guiding Eddie's hands under the lukewarm stream of water. Eddie fixes his gaze on the pink liquid swirling around the drain.

"Unscathed," he spits.

"Eddie," Buck murmurs. "You did everything you could for him."

"It wasn't enough."

Eddie jerks his hands out of Buck's grasp, pumps three drops of soap onto his palm, turns the heat up to full and scrubs and scrubs and scrubs. Buck shuts the tap off just as the water begins to burn, and Eddie slumps into a white-knuckled grip on the edge of the counter, squeezing his eyes shut and hanging his head.

"He had a kid at home, Buck." Eddie bites his lip, revels in the gritty taste of dust. "A little girl. Jackie. God, you should have seen his face when he spoke about her." Even in the darkness, even in tremendous amounts of agony, Joel had lit up like the fucking sun when he spoke of his daughter. For a single moment, Eddie had been back in the well, fighting to get home to Christopher.

"And I know that you did everything in your power to try and get him back to her," Buck says with conviction.

"Well, it wasn't enough, was it?" Eddie snaps. "He died in my care, Buck. I let a little girl lose her father."

"Eddie, that was not your fault," Buck warns him, tone stern. "The universe was working against you in every possible way."

"The universe!" Eddie laughs coldly, meets Buck's eyes in the mirror. "The universe has been working against me my whole goddamn life, Buck. But I'm still here." His voice cracks, but he doesn't take his eyes off Buck. Can't. "Why am I still here?" Buck opens his mouth, but Eddie doesn't want an answer as much as he wants to spit in the universe's filthy fucking face. "Shannon died, my convoy died, Joel died. You died." Eddie takes in a ragged breath, cursing the oxygen in his lungs. "Why am I still alive?"

"Because there is a little boy, who's not all that little anymore, waiting for you at home. A little boy who loves you more than anything in the world. A little boy who needs his dad."

"Wasn't enough for Joel," Eddie croaks.

"No, but." Buck sighs. "You made Chris a promise. To always fight to come home to him. You were just keeping that promise."

"He had a wife," Eddie whispers. "A wife and a kid to get home to. And he fought for them. But..." He squeezes his eyes shut again. "Why am I still here, Buck?"

"For Christopher."

"Christopher would be fine." Eddie shakes his head in dismissal. "He'd have you."

For a moment, the only sound in the bathroom is Eddie's ragged breathing and the drip-drop of a leaky faucet. Then, a low and furious noise, like the grumble of thunder -

"Eddie, you are not expendable."

Eddie huffs a laugh and shakes his head.

"Clearly not," he snaps, spinning around to face Buck head on. "Clearly I'm not expendable when everybody around me, everybody but me keeps dying."

Eddie storms out of the bathroom before Buck can say anything else. The itch under his skin turning into a haunting chorus telling him to run. He follows the winding hallways of the hospital in a blind need for air, suddenly claustrophobic trapped in between four walls, just waiting for it all to come crumbling down around him. He doesn't stop until he's outside, collapsing onto the bench just left of the exit as the tears start to fall. He hunches in on himself and cries into his hands for what feels like hours.

Eventually, somebody eases down onto the bench beside him. He doesn't have to look to know its Buck, can feel it in the warmth where their shoulders touch. Eddie braces himself for whatever Buck is going to say, but nothing comes. Buck just. Sits beside him. Sits with him in his grief. And Eddie is so thankful for it that he almost doesn't remember Bobby's words to him in the hardware store.

a motorcycle accident... it was a bad one... I wasn't at my best at the time... I needed to take a minute and she sat with me.

"Eddie, you said it yourself." Buck smiles at him. "Experiences like this they change us, so you're gonna have to make a choice. What's this gonna change in you?"

Oh, Eddie thinks, that's what its going to change.

[daffi-990]

Seven(ish) Sentence Sunday 📝

Tagged by the wonderfully talented @thewolvesof1998 and @wikiangela. Make sure to check out what they shared 💙

More from the Rival Firefighters 🚒 fic. This time some Eddie and Shannon interaction (Shannon is very much alive in this fic and will remain so. Her and Eddie are divorced and happily co-parenting Chris).

“Well everyone hasn’t had the training and life experiences you’ve had.”

“I know.” Eddie sighs, dragging his hands down his face in exhaustion. “It’s just, this guy is unnecessarily reckless and thinks he’s hot shit. You know I heard he stole a fire truck for a booty call?” A laugh bursts out of Shannon and she quickly brings a hand up to cover her mouth and muffle the noise. She mumbles an apology into her palm and waits for Eddie to continue. “One day he’s going to get someone seriously hurt, or killed. I don’t know how Captain Nash tolerates him to be honest.”

Shannon removes her hand from her mouth and wipes it against her jeans, removing the warm moist feeling. “This probie making you regret moving to LA instead of taking Judd up on his offer for a spot at the 126 in Austin?”

Eddie knows she’s mostly joking, but he can hear the underlying insecurity that Shannon hasn’t been able to shake since the three of them moved here; that she took Eddie and Chris away from his family and some good career opportunities and that he’ll come to regret it.

Eddie reaches across the table and grabs her hands with his own. “Never. You know I’ll never regret moving here with you, Shan. Christopher is thriving and I’m not doing too bad myself. This is just one rookie firefighter who isn’t even at my station. It’s not like I’m going to be seeing a lot of him”

No pressure tagging some friends … @forthewolves @exhuastedpigeon @hippolotamus @callmenewbie @callaplums @wildlife4life @rainbow-nerdss @lover-of-mine @loserdiaz @ladydorian05 @jesuisici33 @devirnis @disasterbuckdiaz @eddiebabygirldiaz @monsterrae1 @honestlydarkprincess @giddyupbuck @athenagranted

[smilingbuckley]

Anyone else avoid fics where Shannon Diaz is still alive? Idk, I just hate her so much. She called raising her disabled kid exhausting and focused more on finding a cure than figuring out how to help her kid live in a world that doesn't accept him. She was so blinded by his disability that she couldn't see the kid behind it. And then it was just easier to abandon that kid. But then she had to force her way back into his life when she was contacted again, not owning up to what she did at all. And I think she was also planning on leaving before she died, if I remember correctly?

So yeah fics where she and Eddie co-parent make me laugh because Christopher deserves a better parent than that ableist deadbeat mom.

'But Eddie left too', Eddie never left because of Christopher's disability. He was in the army and wasn't ready to be a parent, but when he got back he owned up to it and NEVER treated his kid differently because of his disability. He was afraid of being a dad, not Christopher's disability. And after that he always made sure Christopher knows he's loved and that even with his disability he can do what he wants, even if it means they'll have to figure out a different way.

(I am saying this as a fellow disabled person who was also called exhausting by their parent. Specifically, my mom said she didn't have a life because of my disability because of how she needed to adapt to it. It's not like I chose to be disabled? YOU chose to have a kid, own up to your responsibilities. If you can't take care of a disabled child you shouldn't have children in the first place because disabilities aren't just genetic.)

[spaceprincessem]

teasing tidbit tuesday

thank you for the tags @disasterbuckdiaz @devirnis @thekristen999 @hippolotamus @loserdiaz @steadfastsaturnsrings

it's me. hi. i swear im still alive lmao. thank you for everyone who keeps tagging me i promise im chugging along in my wips it's just taking a million years (which im okay with taking things slow). so as a lil treat here's a lil something from the buddie catching fire au and to anyone who is interested i'm working on a summer sons fic (mainly eddie x andrew) as well....

catching fire au Eddie doesn’t back down, face hardening. He can’t leave Bobby behind. Even if it was just out of Bobby’s own safety. Bobby matters to him. Bobby kept him alive and he cares about Eddie. “I’m not leaving Bobby or Buck—” Shannon’s laugh is a little hysterical, disturbing a flock of birds above them. “So,” she says as she crosses her arms over her chest, “you just want to bring everyone without even asking me if we should?” “You and I both know they’ll torture Bobby and Buck to death to find out where I am.” Eddie growls. His nightmares skirt right on the edge of his eyelids. Buck screaming as President Gerrard stands over him with that snake-like smile, blood oozing between his teeth as he tells Buck how lovely his iced cookies are.  He can’t. He can’t let them get Buck. He can’t let President Gerrard have the boy with the bread.

and

summer sons fic “I had this dream.” Eddie watches as Andrew pulls from the blunt, long and slow and near the end. The faded amber tip glows bright beneath the half moon and cascade of stars splattered across the late night sky. He has the urge to lean forward over their tangled, sweat slicked legs just to shotgun the smoke right from Andrew's lips as it billows between them. “Yeah?” Andrew says, a lazy smile tucking up in his mouth as he passes Eddie the blunt. Eddie lets his fingers graze over the familiar shape of Andrew’s knuckles, the soft brush of hair, and the delicate lines on the pads of his fingers that curve and arch in the unique pattern of Andew. Eddie sometimes wonders if there’s parts of him etched there. Just like there are parts of Andrew that make up Eddie; one in the same, no longer two separate entities.

tagging @eddiebabygirldiaz @shortsighted-owl @leothil @hoodie-buck @spotsandsocks @gayhoediaz @fancifulpurposelesslovely @rogerzsteven @wildlife4life @monsterrae1 @renecdote

[birgittesilverbae]

sneak peek - teach me to love, as you have loved me

Happy New Year! Here's a sneak peek of a pre-canon fic I've been working on for a while now

----

The training area Shannon leads her to is one Beatrice had noticed in passing, but never ventured a closer look at. Shannon unlocks the shed at the head of the field, and as Beatrice rounds the corner of it she slows to a halt, eyes wide.

Before her is an array of polearms, bamboo hafts and wooden, capped with hooks and blades and spikes. Shannon doesn't grab any of them, though, instead selecting two training staves from deeper in the shed and tossing one to Beatrice.

She catches it easily. She's worked with the bō since prepubescence, almost, and it feels like an extension of her body.

Shannon juts her chin towards the packed earth of the training field. "Let's see what you've got, Beatrice."

It's clear from early on that Beatrice is more than a match for Shannon. She lands strikes to thigh, arm, side, once even to the head in a blow that sends Shannon staggering and ice down Beatrice's spine. When Shannon rights herself, there's a long welt across her right cheek, but she grins and beckons Beatrice towards her anew.

Shannon's patterns shift, then. From the strikes and blocks of competitive sport to something fiercer, more relentless. Shannon's grin turns predatory. Beatrice finds herself on her back foot, despite her skill, finds herself dodging and bracing against attacks that aim for centre mass, for the groin, the heart, the throat, the head. The end of Shannon's staff pushes and seeks, hungry for blood.

Finally, Shannon sweeps Beatrice's legs out from under her and she ends up on her back, Shannon's staff at her throat.

Shannon taps the butt of her staff against Beatrice's chin and winks, then pulls it back so she can hold a hand out to Beatrice. Her palm is calloused but still soft, and warm against Beatrice's, her grip firm. She throws an arm around Beatrice's shoulders and steers her back towards the shed.

"What changed about my attacks?" Shannon asks, after they've returned their staves to the shed and sat down on the grassy slope alongside the field.

Beatrice ponders the question, the last moments of the fight. "The purpose," she says finally. "Those strikes were meant to inflict damage."

"And if my staff had had a blade on it?" Shannon prompts.

Oh. "Those strikes were meant to kill."

Shannon nods sharply. "There's a difference between fighting for a championship and fighting for your life, Beatrice," she says. Her voice is level, but her eyes have grown distant. "When blades are live and blood is hot, you can't lose focus for even a moment." She raises a hand when Beatrice opens her mouth. "I know that isn't a problem for you," she continues dryly, "I and everyone else has seen you go through your forms. But even a moment's hesitation, a moment's doubt as to what your next action should be, can be the difference between you coming home alive and us holding a vigil for you, too."

[traumabuddies]

tease tidbit tuesday

tagged by @911onabc @wildlife4life @eddiediaztho and @housewifebuck thank you mwah!

So! two fics won on the wip poll yesterday, including the lighting/texas fic (I'll share some for the other one tomorrow). So as promised I added (quite a bit) to it after a few months without touching it, and I'm excited to share that with you.

So, for context, this fic has Eddie in Texas when Buck gets struck by lightning, but this is the night before Eddie leaves, where they hook up and then refuse to talk about it, because the more angst the better!

But Buck must not be putting in as much effort as expected, because when Eddie plants his feet on the ground and puts all his strength behind his next tug, Buck loses his balance, and Eddie falls back on the bed. Buck follows him, ending his tumble right onto Eddie until he’s sprawled all over him and complaining around a laugh right above his face. “Didn’t think you had it in you,” Buck says with a breathy chuckle.  “Yeah,” Eddie says, barely audible, and he should say more, probably. But Buck is laying on top of him, touching him from chest to thighs, his face only a few inches above his, and somehow Eddie is almost uncomfortably aware of it. He can feel everything. The warmth of Buck’s toned body. The softer skin of Buck’s chest pressing against him, all squishy through his shirt—Eddie can’t help but think about how Shannon's breasts hadn’t felt too dissimilar when she was on top of him. Buck’s breath hitting his chin and mouth, Buck’s eyes on him, searching, and still so, so blue and looking more alive than five minutes ago. There’s just—so much Buck Buck Buck, and Eddie’s frozen underneath him, fearing any movement and yet desperately waiting for it. He can tell the moment Buck notices, his breath catching and mouth opening in a subtle ‘o’ as his eyes flick to Eddie’s lips. It doesn’t last longer than a second, but it’s enough for warmth and want to crawl up Eddie’s spine faster than he can think the words.

tagging @rogerzsteven @buck2eddie @buckleyseddie @giddyupbuck @transbuck @alyxmastershipper @oliverstaark @lover-of-mine @bucks118

[loserdiaz]

seven sentence sunday

tagged by @honestlydarkprincess thanks for the tag, babe!

this is way more than seven sentences but oh well. enjoy a snippet from the therapy fic <3

Biting down on his lower lip, Eddie inwardly curses himself and dials Buck's number. "Eddie?" Eddie covers the bottom half of the phone and lets out a shaky exhale. God. He needs to get it fucking together. But one word from Buck, Eddie's name falling from his lips, is enough to almost break him. "Eddie, are you okay?" Eddie can hear the rumble of the sheets being pulled out and Buck getting out of bed frantically. "Is Chris���?" "I'm okay." He sighs, closing his eyes and resting his head against the bed, the floor cold and hard under him but grounding him to reality. "I'm okay. I just— I'm sorry. It's late and you probably were sleeping— Fuck. Buck, I'm so sorry—" "Hey, hey. It's okay." The blonde reassures him over the phone. "I know… I know our relationship isn't the best right now, but you can always call me, Eds. Always." Eddie nods, even if he knows Buck can't see him, and takes a deep breath. There's a beat of silence and then, "You almost died today." He blurts out. The nightmare that woke him so abruptly replaying in his mind like the most awful of horror movies. "You almost died. Again." "Eddie—" "And I woke up, and I just— Buck, I needed to make sure you were okay. And it's stupid and I shouldn't have called, but—" Eddie rubs at his face with his free hand, trying to pull himself together and miserably failing at it. "These nightmares won't leave me alone, you know?" "What are they about?" Buck asks in a whisper, voice small and barely there. "The nightmares?" Eddie sighs, making a face. "I don't know. They're never really the same, you know? I stopped having dreams about Afghanistan a few years ago, sometimes they come back but they're rare. Then… after Shannon died and the ladder truck, I couldn't sleep for weeks without waking up in a cold sweat. The tsunami also didn't help." Eddie lets out a bitter chuckle. "You- you had nightmares about the ladder truck? Ab- about me?" "Yeah." Eddie lets out a shaky breath. "And after the lightning struck, too. I— I don't want to lose you, Buck. I don't want to ever lose you." "I'm sorry." Eddie smiles, sad and bitter. "It's not your fault." He whispers on the phone, wishing Buck were there in front of him so he could reach out and touch him, reassure himself that Buck is real and alive. "Just— don't go falling into any comas again, alright? I don't think I can handle that again." Buck chuckles, tired and hollow. "Can't make any promises but I'll try my best."

tagging: @lostinabuddiehaze @monsterrae1 @buddierights @messyhairdiaz @the-likesofus @elvensorceress @spotsandsocks @alyxmastershipper @ronanlynchgender @rogerzsteven @prettyboybuckley @bigfootsmom @dickley-buddie @fatedbuddie @bekkachaos @shortsighted-owl @hippolotamus @loveyourownsmiilee and anyone else who wants to <333

[wikiangela]

fuck it friday

tagged by @dangerpronebuddie @theotherbuckley 💖

it's technically already friday here but still a little less than an hour before the episode!!! but for now I'm getting back to my beloved alive shannon fic and here's some angst that I've been stuck on bc apparently I can't write eddie and shannon arguing lol

prev snippet

___

“Eddie, there’s nothing to celebrate about our marriage ending.” she said gently, taking a step towards Eddie. He stopped and turned towards her.

“Isn’t there? I thought this was what you wanted.” he scoffed.

“And you agreed.” she bit back, tone defensive. “It was all amicable and mutual, and you agreed, Eddie. I thought we were past this.”

“Well, maybe I’m not.” he wasn’t sure why he was starting something right now, a discussion, maybe an argument. It wasn’t necessary, it was stupid, they’d talked it all over multiple times. Still, seeing the papers, it’s just… it hurt. He knew he had no right attacking her right now, but he just- he wanted her to hurt like he was hurting, and he felt awful about it. “Maybe we rushed this.”

“Rushed?” Shannon asked incredulously. “Are you kidding me? If anything, we should’ve gotten divorced sooner. We hadn’t talked in two years.”

“And whose fault was that?” Eddie had the answer ready before she finished talking. And he knew he wasn’t exactly being fair, the circumstances being what they were (...), but at the moment he didn’t care.

___

no pressure tags: @elvensorceress @gaydiaz @thebravebitch @silentxxsoul @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @transbuck @911onabc @housewifebuck @watchyourbuck @underwater-ninja-13 @eowon @loserdiaz @evanbegins @ladydorian05 @wildlife4life @diazpatcher @lover-of-mine @monsterrae1 @thewolvesof1998 @puppyboybuckley @weewootruck @loveyouanyway @spagheddiediaz @rainbow-nerdss @sunshinediaz @giddyupbuck @epicbuddieficrecs @pirrusstuff @spotsandsocks @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @hoodie-buck @nmcggg @jesuisici33 @exhuastedpigeon @rogerzsteven @hippolotamus @honestlydarkprincess @fortheloveofbuddie @steadfastsaturnsrings @diazsdimples @disasterbuckdiaz @tizniz @daffi-990

[daniwib]

Returned

During the tsunami, Buck frantically worked to rescue as many people as he could, practically on autopilot.

Hear a scream, save a life - or two, or three. Check on Christopher. Repeat.

It wasn’t until Christopher cried out his mother’s name that Buck realized just who he’d saved.

And then he saw that Shannon wasn’t the only dead person sitting on top of a submerged fire engine in the middle of a tsunami, no longer dead, but very, very much alive.

OR: The Returned AU that was asked for.

Fic is complete. Chapters (3) posted weekly. Read on Ao3 here

Comments adored, reblogs appreciated!

[altschmerzes]

Please take this to use in an emergency 🫱🌹

THANK YOU i would like to use this now as an excuse to post another clip from wriggle up on dry land, which i am hoping to get a new chapter up for in the next couple days

this is from Much later in the fic-

There is a pause wherein Ted very seriously considers not answering the phone, but ultimately he picks it up and swipes the screen, holding it up to his ear with a, “Hello?” that probably sounds as bewildered as he feels given the lack of caller ID and the late hour. “Coach Lasso?” is the hesitant greeting he receives. Immediately, alarm bells begin to go off in Ted’s brain. This is an unknown number, calling Ted pretty late at night, and on the other end of the call is a young voice that he can’t immediately place and it sounds completely freaked out. The voice then clarifies, “This is Shannon Cross. You said, uh, you said the other day to call you if anything ever… ever happened. With Jamie.” Whatever alarm bells had begun to ring then proceed to become full-on sirens, screaming klaxons drowning out much of Ted’s coherent thought. “Did something happen?” It’s a highly redundant question to ask and Ted knows this, but Shannon seems like she might need the guidance to get to the answer. Even the quiet on the other end of the line is uncertain and alive with frightened energy. “Yeah, it’s… Yeah. Something- Yeah.”

[911-on-abc]

inspiration saturday

not going to make a collage because this is a country music AU, so I might as well share some country music

(okay some of this is going to be folk and bluegrass because that's my shit and I won't apologize!!!)

While I'm Waiting Here by Billy Strings (he's a bluegrass musician so this is kind of cheating but he is one of my top 3 favorite artists (who is still alive); In the fic Eddie writes it about Shannon)

Before The Next Teardrop Falls by Freddy Fender, one of the few Latino artists in Country

El Paso by Marty Robbins (because buck is a little shit)

Before 9-1-1 Connie Britton was in an ABC show called Nashville which was... a show... this arc with whatever this guy's name idk is very similar to her arc in 9-1-1, so just sub his face with Buck's lmao

Buried Under

tags below!!

thank you for tagging me: @loserdiaz, @cal-daisies-and-briars, @jesuisici33, @pirrusstuff (sorry if I'm missing anyone!!)

tagging: @thewolvesof1998, @exhuastedpigeon, @elgascreamslikehell, @housewifebuck, @watchyourbuck, @wildlife4life, @daffi-990, @rainbow-nerdss, @your-catfish-friend, @annieontheside (if you've already done with tag game I'm sorry for tagging you again haha)

[try-set-me-on-fire]

Some extra thoughts about Buck sees death au (same content warnings for the rest of the fic asdfg)

I always planned to end the fic where I did but I do think the rest of their stay in El Paso is rockier. Chris wakes up really early the next morning and wants to make pancakes but Buck doesn’t want to use ingredients in someone else’s kitchen without permission so they sneak out to a grocery store in their pajamas (they didn’t want to wake Eddie up digging around in the suitcases) and Ramon is up by the time they get back and is disgruntled that they went out into the world less than fully dressed and presentable, and Chris is like “It’s vacation, abuelo, you can wear pajamas on vacation” in his teenager duh voice and Ramon isn’t happy about that either and there’s probably some this is the example you want to set kind of comment aimed at Buck and like Eddie is still in bed and Buck isn’t sure how much he should be pushing back on this so he kind of just tries to smooth it over and start making the pancakes and things are still kind of weird and tense when Eddie gets up but Buck doesn’t want to start anything up again so he just shakes his head at Eddie’s questioning look and starts plating breakfast. (Also he happened to see freesias at the store and got Eddie a little bouquet, the sap.)

And then later in the day Buck gets a migraine (been happening more frequently since the lightning strike but not enough that his doctor is worried) and Eddie is kicking himself because he forgot to pack the excedrin but his mom has some so Buck takes the medicine and Eddie bundles him back to bed and leaves him to rest for awhile and when he comes back out Helena starts asking questions that start off concerned and quickly become pointed about how dangerous their jobs are, how they both put themselves at risk, what would happen to Christopher, maybe Buck should consider non-active duty, he did die after all, etc etc. and Eddie gets very snippy because they’re not going to quit their jobs, he didn’t die, he’s right here in the other room very much alive, and Shannon died crossing a fucking street so anything can happen to anyone at any time, mom, I’m not going to live my life worried about what might happen. I have his back and he has mine. We’re getting married in the summer. He brought me flowers this morning. This is the life I want to live.

And the two of them go out square dancing with Adriana that night and Buck is still terrible at it and Eddie loves him so so much and he gets a little drunk and they make out in the bathroom and he sloppily whispers “I want you inside me so fucking bad” but they don’t actually get around to doing anything more giving each other a hickey or two, Buck promising to treat him so right once they get back home. And maybe Eddie convinces the still sober Adriana to drive them around town to places he used to hang out, which turns kind of sad because they’re mostly places he used to hang out with Shannon. “It hurts sometimes,” he sighs into Buck’s collarbones, “To love somebody so much.” And they hold each other very tight when they get back to the house and go to bed, and are too hungover in the morning to particularly care that Ramon and Helena disapprove of this, too, but goodbyes manage to be civil and when his parents say they’re looking forward to the wedding they mean it, and when they shake Buck’s hand and say they’re glad Eddie has him in his life they mean that too. And driving with a hangover is miserable but they’re together and going home and so things are okay.

And like Buck is still depressed and anxious and working through his ptsd, he’s not just fixed by a few nice conversations with people who love him, but he’s in a much better place than he was throughout winter, and he keeps going to therapy and working on how to feel better and when the freeway collapse happens it doesn’t destroy him as much as he might have expected, because he’s able to get everyone out safe because he really is good at his job and everyone really does have each other’s backs. And in the summer when Buck and Eddie get married it’s truly so lovely. The light is beautiful, and they have breakfast for dinner, and there are freesias everywhere, and its all perfect because they’re here together. And then the next year or the year after they do have another kid, and it’s wonderful and terrifying and hard and the easiest thing in the world and Chris is a fantastic older brother and they all just get to live their lives, with all the good and bad that comes with that. Mostly good! They have each other, it’s mostly good!

And then far future, I think in 20 or so years everyone is at a family bbq and reminiscing about the good ol days and wilder calls they had and Buck is like… i know how this is going to sound but I used to know when people were going to die. And everyone’s like oh yeah you had great instincts and he shakes his head and explains the whole thing and it leads to a terrible fight between him and Eddie because Eddie spent those months very frightened that Buck might try to kill himself. He’s angry that Buck went through this alone, he’s angry that Buck didn’t let him know the truth while it was happening, he’s angry that he wasn’t even entirely wrong. Buck threw himself in front of that car! He wasn’t doing well! By his own admission Bobby used to disappear when he was feeling suicidal, the lightning happened to be the thing that got him but what if, what if, what if. And Buck admits that if he didn’t have Eddie it might have gone another way but he did have him, Eddie took such good care of him even when he was too afraid or sad or exhausted to explain what he was really going through. And Eddie is only angry because he loves him so much so they work it out and then have a lot of tender middle aged sex about it.

Anyway, this was a fun au I had a great time making poor Buck so so miserable! I hope you had fun with it too!