#the lesson of the day is that chosen deserved so so SO much better while dark deserves to rot in hell

[xjackjackx]

An Analysis of Chosen and Dark's "Friendship" (And Why I Don't Like ChoDark)

This is frankly something I've felt and wanted to talk about for a long time, so here it is: my ramblings about Cho and Dark's relationship (based off pure canon on-screen) and why ChoDark is, in my opinion, a pretty bad and uncomfortable ship.

The biggest issue with ChoDark is that a lot of the foundation for their relationship is either outdated or straight-up false. Whether it be that they were friends rampaging for seven full years before Chosen got remorse halfway through, or that Dark wanted to impress Chosen or anything.

AVA 11 kinda threw that out of the window by revealing Newgrounds was in 2011. At most two months since they met.

The first thing to note is that Cho and Dark's friendship was formed strictly out of Chosen's sympathy and Dark's opportunism. Chosen has always held more mercy for stick figures (except AIM cause fuck that guy apparently), so when he saw Dark begging for mercy he gave him a chance at friendship. Dark - who, as we see later, is a coward prioritizing himself above others - immediately jumps at the opportunity without a second thought (which, in hindsight, should've warned Chosen about the man's loyalty to others). Their whole relationship began with Dark using Chosen's kindness for himself. The first thing they do together is to start destroying everything in their sight; whether it was Chosen or Dark who started it, it doesn't matter.

That's where most of us thought they spent all the seven years rampaging together with Cho taking a while before he grew a conscience. But then AVA 11 revealed that Newground was in 2011. In what was at most two months, Dark became a maniac focused on destruction while Cho began to feel sorry for what he was done and wanted to stop. It's implied he mostly stuck around and didn't stop Dark because he had poor social skills/was afraid of Dark, as he seems pretty uncomfortable around him (Flashback implies he tried to plead and reason with Dark, but that was most likely Cho twisting around his memories to make himself look better; not the first time he would've been selfish). Meaning it was seven years of Chosen alone with a guy he didn't actually like who, as we learn later, never knew the real Chosen.

Then comes S2, where Dark plans to destroy everything and everyone with the ViraBots. This is what finally gets Chosen to stand up to Dark and try to stop him. While he has to get physical, nothing seems to imply he wants to outright harm Dark until he gets an entire fireball thrown at him. Which is another thing I want to point out: I've seen many people accuse Chosen of "betraying" Dark, but... he tried to talk things down, used small physical action (when you take in the fact both of these guys are gods, being thrown on the ground is basically nothing) and didn't even seem to actively hurt Dark, just make him stop. Dark tried to fucking kill Chosen with that fireball, or at least heavily injure him. Dark was clearly the traitor between the two and I frankly won't be hearing otherwise, especially since this lines up with his earlier characterization of immediately selling out Alan and later info about his wristband, we get to that in a minute. Cho is a morally gray person but he's fully in the right and the victim in this specific moment.

But regardless, the two continue to throw hands. The big thing here is the Vira-Band. It's not just a generic power-up, it specifically grants Dark immunity to laser beams.

This is way too specific of an ability to be brushed off. Dark specifically created a weapon against Chosen. And unless we're arguing he made something so powerful in the 10-ish minutes that Chosen was gone, he had it made in advance. Combine that with Dark quickly turning on Alan and how he easily he decided Chosen needs to go, it becomes clear that Dark was actively planning to betray and kill Chosen. Or that, at the bare minimum, he was ready to kill Chosen if they ever turn on each other.

So, combining all their screentime and knowledge together, we get this:

Chosen spared Dark out of the genuine kindness in heart, but very quickly changed his mind upon calming down following his post-Alan rage and realising Dark's fucking demented. Despite this, he never made any attempts to stop Dark, the implication being that he either still saw good in Dark or was too afraid of him to stand up. And when he did, he put in all he had to stop him, and currently little implies he misses the guy.,

Dark first joined Chosen out of personal convenience, and thought of him as an ally he can destroy with... while apparently planning to betray and kill him. This is admittedly a bit contradictory, but given all the information we have, it's safe to say Dark saw Chosen as more of an extension of himself, someone who shares all his beliefs, and when Chosen proved independent he got angry and tried to remove him from the equation to continue uninterrupted.

And this is where my main issue with ChoDark lays (ignoring the possibility they're siblings since hollowhead relationships are confusing af). To clarify, I'm far from being against Foe Yay/shipping enemies together together. The issue is that a lot of what I heard about ChoDark just... isn't there. It's, for me, a ship built primarily out of outdated interpretations that are contradicted by the release of AVA 11, and fanon moreso than canon. They didn't spend seven years destroying as friends, Chosen spent seven years together with a man he was uncomfortable around and couldn't stand up to despite seemingly wanting to, to the point his likely-false memories show him pleading with an ignorant Dark. Dark didn't want what's best to Chosen/to help him, he wanted to spread personal destruction for himself and tried to kill Cho the moment he stepped out of line; hell, he was seemingly planning this for a while given the Viraband's existence. Chosen, at least from the very limited information of his post-Showdown, doesn't seem to miss Dark all that much. And why would he? It seems like he never liked the guy, at least not anymore. There is nothing to miss, at least from the actual canon content.

A lot of the content for ChoDark revolves around ignoring what's seemingly their canonical characterizations and dynamic for a fan-made one, which also involves frankly ignoring Dark's canon personality for a fan-made one... at which point are you shipping Chosen with Dark, or an OC with Dark's name and face? That's moving past the argument ChoDark is glorifying a toxic relationship, as there really is no other way to describe "Guy hangs around with friend he's uncomfortable around because he can't stand up/has no one else, and said friend is only using him".

So yeah. This is my personal analysis of Chosen and Dark's relationship/"friendship" and why I'm personally very uncomfortable with ChoDark as a pairing, platonic and especially romantic. Their canon friendship, based off what I see at least, was based off Chosen being too kind/submissive for his own good and Dark exploiting that while preparing for the moment Chosen stops being fun. Something that makes for an awful and fake friendship, let alone romance.

KingCho is superior anyway and deserves its own post btw

[lavendercharm]

Linger, Chapter 5: Kiss With A Fist/Human Nature

A/N:

Ya'll. Writing this chapter felt like a marathon. But I think I'm ultimately very happy with it. Please let me know what you think!

This chapter is a bit longer, and I think it deserved to be named after two songs because of that. "Kiss With A Fist" by Florence + The Machine definitely fits the first half of this chapter and was one of the first songs I added to my playlist when writing this story, so I knew I wanted to use it for the big public confrontation.

The vibes toward the end are different. I discovered this song earlier this week and haven't been able to stop listening to it, so maybe I'm just reaching to try and justify including it lol. But "Human Nature" by Barrie is what I decided to use for the second half of this. Cause they're spitting facts when they say "Human nature doesn't always come easy" lmfao.

This is far from the end of this story, but it may be a second before you hear from me, depending on how busy the next few weeks are. I say that - watch me turn around and post something this weekend lol.

Thank you to everyone who's stuck with me thus far. I love you and I'm so grateful to know you're along for the ride.

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Summary: From the moment you meet her, you can't stand Melissa Schemmenti.

Warnings: Strong Language

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Barbara Howard did not take days off. It was only recently that she allowed herself her first mental health day, and while she could see the benefits, she had been eager to get back to her classroom, her students, her best friend, and even her coworkers. The life of a teacher was unpredictable, and the life of a teacher at Abbott Elementary came with its own unique set of challenges, but Barbara had seen a lot in her decades of teaching. With some hard work, support from her fellow teachers, and the grace of God himself, she had seen and survived it all. Barbara Howard could conquer anything thrown her way.

However, if Barbara had the magical gift of foresight, she might have chosen Monday morning to take her second mental health day in her entire history at Abbott. 

As it was, Barbara could not see into the future, and so she entered the teacher’s lounge at 6:30 AM, on the dot. She claimed her usual spot, made herself a cup of coffee, and began sorting through her lesson plans for the week. She enjoyed her few moments of serenity in the lounge prior to the arrival of her more talkative coworkers. It wasn’t unusual for Melissa to arrive a bit later, especially on a Monday, so Barbara thought nothing of her absence. She politely greeted Janine and Jacob as they entered together; she did the same for Gregory shortly after. As the three younger teachers gathered at their table and discussed their weekends, Barbara continued her work, occasionally reacting to what she overheard. And when you entered the lounge, your first time visiting in the morning, Barbara was mildly surprised, but she shot you a warm smile all the same. She noticed you seemed to be a bit tense, but she chalked it up to the fact that you were still very new. 

Melissa had talked her ear off about you last Monday, of course, explaining your tardiness and the shots you’d taken at her about her age. When Barb pressed her for details about your confrontation and what you’d said to each other, she simply said, “I took care of business, a’right?” 

While Barbara agreed it was unprofessional of you to arrive late, she also knew Melissa better than anyone else in Abbott did; she knew Melissa could take things too far. Melissa was as passionate as they came, which meant she was one of the best teachers at the school. On the flip side, she also had a short fuse. Barbara knew she didn’t have all of the details, but she didn’t think much of it - you were a sub, after all. She expected she’d never actually meet you. 

So when you arrived in the lounge for lunch the day after your explosive argument, she was shocked. While skeptical of you, she couldn’t help but admire your tenacity. You’d come face to face with the wrath of Melissa Schemmenti and still returned to Abbott. You’d introduced yourself, and as far as Barbara could tell, you were perfectly polite and well mannered. The displeasure and hostility radiating off of Melissa was felt by everyone in the lounge, but aside from giving her close friend a pointed look, Barbara chose to ignore it. 

You’d continued showing up the rest of the week, greeting Barbara every day before taking a seat with Janine and Jacob, as well as Gregory, occasionally. The younger teachers seemed to have taken an instant liking to you, the four of you sharing stories from previous schools or discussing the latest movie releases. You’d even had a good-natured exchange with Ava one morning. The principal had leant against the corner with her phone and talked you through her “roster”, whatever that meant. Barbara was sure she didn’t want to know. 

Barbara observed how seamlessly you integrated into Abbott’s social circles - with the obvious exception of the red head who always sat to her right in the lounge. Melissa pretended you didn't exist, which would have been fine if it wasn’t the elephant in the room. Your first day in the lounge, Janine had tried to talk to Melissa about you. She’d turned to Melissa with a huge grin on her face and said, “Man, Melissa, you’re so lucky to have such an awesome sub as your aide.” 

Melissa had glanced at Janine over the rim of her cat-eye glasses, and in a sharp tone, retorted, “What sub?” That’s all it took for everyone in the room to grasp her unspoken message: If you value your life, drop it. The only reaction Barbara saw was a sharp flash of your eyes before you turned your back to the older woman and called Janine over, changing the subject. 

But last Friday, Melissa caught up with Barbara after the school day ended and explained that you’d just given her two VIP tickets to the Eagles game on Sunday. If there was anything that would help Melissa forgive your transgressions, it was that. Once again, Barbara found herself impressed with you - you took the initiative to make amends and you’d knocked it out of the park. She was happy for her friend. She’d told Melissa, “Just think of how much you’ll be able to accomplish now that you and that young woman can work together. Now, you and Gary go enjoy that ball game.” 

A week after your first morning at Abbott, all of the water was seemingly under the bridge, and the staff room could breathe easy again. No one paid much mind to the anxiety radiating off of you. For the most part, the energy in the room was calming as the day began. 

The sudden CRACK of the door slamming into the shelves violently ripped the room’s occupants out of their morning zen. It was enough to cause everyone to nearly jump out of their skin. Heads whipped in the direction of the doorway as Melissa’s furious form charged into the lounge. Her attention was initially on Barb, but as she opened her mouth to speak, her eyes locked on you. The blush of fury rose instantly in her cheeks. She ripped her bag off of her shoulder and tossed it in the direction of her regular table, nearly hitting Barbara in the process, and as her eyes narrowed, you could practically see the steam rolling off of her as she hissed out, “You.” 

And that’s when Barbara knew any chance of a peaceful morning had gone out the window.

—----------------------

As your weekend began, it didn’t take long for it to sink in that you were well and truly fucked. You completely failed to consider the consequences of your little scheme. There’s no way in hell Melissa wouldn’t be out for blood at the start of the next school week. The smartest thing to do would be to never return to Abbott, move to a new city across the country, and change your legal name. You went back and forth between chastising yourself for being ridiculous, and being so ridden with anxiety that you couldn’t eat. You felt so stupid - what did you think would happen? 

Ultimately, you reached a point where you couldn’t handle the crushing weight of what you’d done alone, so you’d spilled to Ava. Her response had been about the least reassuring thing she could have said.

You did WHAT? I didn’t know you were crazy like that! You’re gonna die girl. I’m not even joking. We gotta go out this weekend, cause it’s your last one alive. I’ll make sure you have fun tho. Do you own any latex?

After refusing Ava’s offers to make your last days on earth worthwhile, you spent most of the weekend drowning in anxiety and imagining how Melissa would bring about your demise. You decided you had to do your best to prepare. You literally couldn’t afford to not go back to Abbott, especially after getting your headlights repaired Saturday afternoon. Under the anxiety, you could feel the ember of your rage, still pulsing with a red-hot glow, so you decided to grasp ahold of it. What you’d done was shitty, sure. But compared to smashing headlights? All you’d done was get even.

Seeing as you couldn’t afford to uproot your whole life and leave Philadelphia, the next most logical thing to do was to never be caught alone in a room with Melissa ever again. You were pretty sure this was something you could pull off - you figured you had two weeks left at Abbott tops, and as long as you had kids or other teachers in the same room, you would have witnesses who could recount your violent death should Melissa murder you. 

This is what caused you to arrive at Abbott on Monday morning a full hour and a half before you needed to be there. You’d dithered in your car for about fifteen minutes, debating driving away and then talking yourself out of it. Eventually, you braved the outdoors, darting into the building and down the hallways as quickly as you could. You practically sprinted past Melissa’s classroom door - the lights were out, but even though you logically knew she wasn’t in yet, your mind conjured a vivid image of her jumping out of the shadows like a monster in waiting. You slowed down and tried to control your breathing as you entered the teacher’s lounge, and you were immediately soothed to see how many people were already there. Even better, Melissa was absent. 

As you passed Barbara, you gave her a hesitant smile. You actually liked Barbara, as much as you can like someone who’s polite and whom you don’t know very well. You figured it may be the last chance you get - surely the woman would turn against you once Melissa told her what you’d done. Janine, Jacob, and Gregory were all sitting at your usual table, and after preparing your morning coffee, you quickly situated yourself in a seat, thankfully facing the door to the lounge.

“Hey!” Janine said, shooting you her adorable, slightly gapped-toothed smile. “How was your weekend?”

“Oh, uh… it was fine,” you said, your eyes darting toward the door as it opened. Not Melissa . “Mostly caught up on chores… had to get some work done to my car, fun stuff like that.”

“Car problems are tough,” Gregory said, spooning a bite out of his bowl of plain oatmeal. “What was wrong with it?”

“Uh…” you hesitated, unsure if you wanted to share what was really wrong. It would inevitably lead to questions and the last thing you wanted was for everyone to know the details of your feud. It was one thing for everyone to know Melissa didn’t like you - there were very few people Melissa actually liked in general. But it was another entirely for them to know she’d smashed out your headlights. Something generic - a bad alternator, maybe - would suffice.

You didn’t even get the chance to lie.

Despite the fact that you could see the doorway, the resounding SMACK of the door slamming open still made you jump. Before your brain knew what it was processing, in stormed Melissa Schemmenti, thick heels clacking on the linoleum tiles. She wore a form fitting pink sweater, the neckline questionably appropriate, and skin tight black pants. Her saint necklaces shimmered from their home on her collarbones. You supposed she wanted to look hot when she killed you.

It only took a moment for her eyes to lock on you, and in that moment you knew things were about to get ugly. To your surprise, seeing the flustered state she was in created a feeling of immense satisfaction. She was furious because your plan had worked. You didn’t even fight the smile that began to find its way onto your lips. The anxiety wasn’t gone, but you relished in the triumphant feeling of landing a critical hit. 

“ You,” she hisses, tossing her bag from her shoulder. The tension in the air was thick enough to be cut with a knife. 

Your eyebrows shoot up, feigned ignorance in your voice as you point at yourself and respond, “Who, me?”

She starts toward you, and everyone else at your table scatters. You’re shocked to see Janine step in front of you, her hands up placatingly. “Melissa-”

“Shut it, pipsqueak, and get out of my way ,” she growls, her gaze over Janine’s head burning holes in you. 

“Hey!” You spit out, anger spiking and crowding out your anxiety. You’re suddenly standing. “Don’t call her that!”

Janine turns to you, holding a hand in your direction now too. “It’s fine, she calls me that all the time-” 

“It’s not fine!” You shout, fists balled. Your eyes are glued to Melissa’s. “You think you can say and do whatever you want because no one will stand up to you. Well, I’m not going to put up with it!” 

“Oh my god, please stop this. I will never psychologically recover from seeing your dead body,” Jacob pleads, wedged between the corner of the room and the fridge for cover. 

“Can’t believe I was dumb enough to trust ya,” Melissa growls. “And after all that bullshit about ‘olive branches' and bein’ cordial.”

You smirk. “Oh, right! How was the game?”

Melissa starts forward again and Janine has to physically hold her back. She’s shockingly effective in spite of her small stature. 

“Ya know I didn’t get into the game! Gary and I went all the way to the stadium, but you gave me fake tickets! We wasted our whole afternoon and got harassed by security!” she shouts. 

“So what are you gonna do about it? Beat me up? Call the cops on me?” you challenge.

A deeply offended look crosses Melissa’s face as her jaw drops. “Are you callin’ me a snitch?” she snarls. She surges against Janine one more time, who manages to keep her back again. “That’s low, even for you!” Melissa says nastily over Janine’s shoulder.

“Oh, that’s low?” You ask incredulously. “Low like smashing someone’s headlights out?” There’s an audible gasp from Jacob in the corner, and you feel the heat of everyone’s gaze turn from you to Melissa, the whole room enthralled by your verbal tennis match. 

Melissa glances around her before pointing an accusatory finger at you. “Ya can’t prove that was me!” You thought someone would have to have been born yesterday to believe that; anyone who worked at Abbott knew that’s exactly something Melissa would do. 

“Oh yeah, because everyone else here keeps a bat taped under their desk like a neurotic asshole!” you proclaim, throwing your hands up in the air. 

“I’ll show you ya stronza- ” Melissa hisses, pushing past Janine and beginning to reach for you. Your arms come up to instinctively protect your face, but before she can reach you, a figure closer to your height blocks your vision.

“THAT IS ENOUGH!” Barbara Howard bellows. The whole room comes to a standstill, frozen in time. Even Melissa has been stopped in her tracks, her eyes wide in shock as Barbara looks accusingly between the two of you. You feel immediately ashamed. “Are you both not grown adults? I cannot believe the absolute foolishness I’ve just witnessed!” She rounds on Melissa. “Especially from you!” 

“Barb, she-” Melissa starts. 

“I don’t care if she insulted your cooking to your face, you do not behave like catty teenagers! We are professional, grown people! Acting like this in front of your peers? Disgraceful! ”

She rounds on you, her eyes narrowing. “And you. To think that I was beginning to think highly of you. You went to all that trouble to make fake football tickets, just to get back at Melissa? Have you ever heard the phrase ‘An eye for an eye’ ?” 

The pit of shame in your stomach is sickening as you slowly lower your arms, your eyes unable to meet Barbara’s. Feeling like a petulant child, you couldn’t help but mutter, “She started it.”

“And now I’m ending it!” Barbara yells. You feel her grip the sleeve of your sweater and pull. You stumble after, seeing her grasp Melissa as well. “You are both coming with me!” The rest of the lounge doesn’t move a muscle as Barbara Howard physically drags you into the hallway. 

She marches with both of you in tow, Melissa sending you the nastiest glares she can muster from the other side of her friend. Stopping in front of a classroom full of bright colors and tiny chairs, Barbara turns to both of you. “This has gotten completely out of hand! You are both going to sit in my room and we are going to work through this. I don’t care if it takes all day - you will NOT be allowed out until you can act like civilized adults!” She folds her arms and gestures her head forward. You stare back for a moment, thinking she must be joking, but the woman doesn’t budge. After a moment longer, you enter the classroom. You’re followed closely by Melissa, who stalks to the other end of the room. 

Barbara closes her door and pulls down the window blind. She turns to you both, her eyes closed and her shoulders rising in deep, even breaths. Eventually, she opens her eyes, and commands, “Take a seat.”

You glance around and only see chairs for children. You begin to protest, but the look on Barbara’s face prompts you to simply grab the nearest chair and plant yourself in it. Your knees are comically close to your chest and you don’t know where to put your hands. You settle on resting them on top of your knees. Melissa is pacing back and forth, muttering to herself - you guess she gets to ignore Barbara’s request. 

“Now,” Barbara begins. “We are going to talk out your problems so we can put this whole mess behind us. Your students deserve you at your best, and you cannot be your best when you’re at each other’s throats!” She’s stern, chastising, and you feel ridiculous. “Where did all of this animosity start? Why are you angry with Melissa?”

You can’t help but scoff because the answer should be obvious. Barbara presses her lips together in annoyance and you quickly reply, “Well, where do I begin? Aside from smashing my headlights out, she’s done nothing but disrespect me since I stepped foot in her room. She was insulting me before she even learned my name!”

“I never learned your name,” she pipes up spitefully, and you whip your head around to glare at her. 

“Memory not as good as it used to be?” you retort. A muscle in her jaw jumps out as she clenches her jaw, her face coloring once more. 

Before she has a chance to rip into you again, Barbara cuts you both off with a stern, “Knock it off!” She looks exasperatedly between the two of you before pinching the bridge of her nose. “The Lord is testing me today,” she whispers to herself, shaking her head. She turns her attention to the fiery woman across the room. “Melissa?” 

Melissa comes to a stop, planting herself and leaning her weight onto one hip. She rolls her eyes, gesticulating wildly as she speaks. “If we’re goin’ back to the start, then first things first, she strolled into my class thirty minutes late. Didn’t even have the decency to apologize.” 

“You didn’t give me a chance to!” you protest. “I hadn't even stepped into the room before you were criticizing me. It’s not like I did it on purpose, it was a complete and total accident. And then you started insulting how young and inexperienced I look.” 

“I was just givin’ you a hard time, that’s all,” she says indignantly. “How was I suppose ta know you can’t take a joke?”

Your head whips toward her. “And smashing my headlights? Was that a joke?” you retort incredulously. 

Her eyes narrow and her tone is venomous as she hisses, “Nah, that was for throwin’ away my school supplies, stealin’ lunches, and callin’ me a bitch.” 

You hear Barbara’s sharp inhale and jump to defend yourself. “Those supplies were all broken or unusable! You have so much on your hands with two classes and I was just trying to help you. Also, Janine gave me that lasagna because I forgot my lunch, I didn’t steal anything. You wouldn’t give me a chance to explain myself before jumping down my throat. Not to mention calling me degrading names in Italian!” 

Barbara raises an eyebrow and gives Melissa a knowing glance. “Melissa uses gabbortz quite often, it’s nothing to get offended over,” she says, an attempt to reassure you.

Melissa’s eyes dart to Barbara’s as she huffs, “Uh, it’s gabbadost , Barb. And I mighta used somethin’ more… vulgar.” To your disbelief, the red head practically looks sheepish at this admission. Her arms cross in front of her as she shifts her weight, and your eyes are drawn to how the motion causes her cleavage to swell ever so slightly. Feeling heat flood your cheeks, you dart your eyes all over the room, attempting to find something else to fix them on. Luckily, neither woman seems to notice. Barbara’s eyebrows are furrowed in an inquisitive way that suggests she’s waiting for the shorter woman to elaborate. Melissa lets out a puff of air. “I mighta used the ‘P’ word, a’right?” 

Barbara’s eyes widen as her mouth drops open in a gasp. “The ‘P’ word? Melissa Schemmenti, you don’t mean-”

“Yeah, yeah, the one I save exclusively for Kristin Marie. That ‘P’ word.” You don’t know who Kristin Marie is, but Barbara looks positively scandalized.

Tearing her eyes away from Melissa, Barbara stands and turns away from both of you, hands on her hips and head shaking in disapproval. As she takes her turn pacing across the room, the disappointed silence from the older woman allows the weight of the last week to settle on you, and you find yourself suddenly exhausted. You lean forward, your head in your hands and the shame rising inside of you like a tidal wave. How did you get here? 

“Well, I think you both have been sufficiently horrible to each other,” Barbara says, turning toward you. “Now explain how this has all made you feel.” 

You and Melissa groan in unison. “Come on, Barb,” Melissa starts, but Barbara holds up a single admonishing finger to silence her. The Italian woman becomes subdued immediately, and you notice how different Melissa’s reaction is to being silenced by Barbara.

“How has this made you feel?” the older woman presses, her tone of voice a warning to comply. Melissa leans against the wall, refusing to budge. You all sit in tense silence for what feels like an eternity, and you wish the floor would swallow you up. She was using the same tactics on you that you might use on two fighting eight year olds.

Eventually, you can’t handle the tension any longer and you burst out, “I feel totally disrespected!” You look to Barbara and she gestures for you to continue. “I uh… I feel belittled, and like you don’t take me seriously, but I think the worst part is I never got the chance to prove to you that I belong here… you wrote me off before you even met me. I’ve worked hard, and I love what I do, so to have you disregard me right off the bat, just because I made a mistake and I look young… it felt pretty shitty,” you admit, the confession coming out of you in one long rush. 

“Especially because… I was excited to work with you,” you add quietly. You’re suddenly enamored with the floor, unable to bring yourself to look either woman in the eye. You feel exposed and vulnerable, and you’re majorly uncomfortable with it. 

You’re forced to endure your feelings of discomfort for a few more torturous minutes. Suddenly, your eyes widen in shock as a husky voice meets your ears, and it takes a moment for your brain to process the words. 

“I guess I feel a lot of the same,” Melissa admits. You raise your gaze to meet hers, and she’s staring at you intently, the earnestness reflected in her jewel-green eyes making your heart skip a beat. “Felt like you didn’t really care when you were late. Some a’ these kids? They got plenty of adults outside of these walls that don’t really care. That’s the last thing they need here. And then ya walked in and you look so young… I couldn't resist teasin' ya. But then you got me back and I got defensive, and I shouldnt’a.” She shifts her weight, casting her eyes to the floor. “I bought all those supplies with my own money,” she admits. “So seein’ you throwin’ em away, it really rubbed me the wrong way. But… you were right. I was tryin’ to stretch em when there was no more room to stretch. And then seein’ my lasagna on your desk… I know I can be a real hot head, and I took it out on ya and it wasn’t fair.” 

As you look at Melissa, her red hair shining under the fluorescents and her evident unease at her own candor, there’s a swelling feeling in your chest and a warmth slowly spreading in your limbs. “Melissa,” you say, and her head snaps up to meet you. You search her eyes, waiting for her to snap at you for using her first name. She doesn’t. She simply waits, holding your gaze, and you can’t quite read what’s behind her eyes, but you suspect it’s something far softer than she’s shown you before. 

You allow yourself to swim in those emerald pools for just a second longer before you admit, tenderly, “I’m sorry.” You see her shoulders drop ever so slightly, tension releasing as she allows your words to sink in. “I’m sorry for what I’ve said about your age. I’m sorry for throwing your things away without asking. And I’m really sorry about the Eagles tickets. That definitely wasn’t my finest moment.” You say the last bit with a touch of humor. You pause for a moment, before adding, “I’m not going to apologize for the lasagna, though. Janine insisted on giving it to me, and it was one of the most incredible things I’ve ever tasted.” 

You see her eyes widen, her brows raising in surprise. A genuine satisfied smile graces her lips, and you can’t help but momentarily wish things had been different over the last week so you could have seen more of those. That smile made her entire demeanor change. 

“Well,” she says, eyes flashing with her own humor. She shoots you a sly grin, and you return a small smile of your own. “If I’m bein’ real with ya, I’m impressed. Fake tickets? Pretty diabolical,” she continues, admiration in her voice. Her smile fades, though, and she brings her hand up, pressing a knuckle to her lips briefly in thought. She sighs, murmuring, “I’m sorry too. I shoulda given you a chance before jumpin’ to conclusions. And, uh… I’ll pay for ya to get your headlights fixed.” She mutters that last part, and you notice that she didn’t apologize for smashing them - but you know it’s as close as she’ll come, because you’re not sure she entirely regrets it. You’ll take what you can get.

“Thank you,” you murmur, and once again you suddenly can’t look at her anymore. Luckily, Barbara draws your focus to her as she clears her throat. You both look toward the older teacher as she stares down at you, a smug, triumphant smile dancing across her full lips. 

“Now, was that so hard?” She asks, her voice teasing both of you. For the first time in days, you feel like you can breathe fully again. Melissa rolls her eyes, pulling herself away from the wall, but you detect a hint of relief radiating off of the woman as well. 

“Don’t expect us to hold hands or nothin’ Barb,” she says as she heads for the door. When she reaches it, she pauses and turns to you. She considers you for a moment, and you begin to feel warm underneath her gaze. Finally, she says, “Well, ya comin’? We got lessons to plan for the day. How do ya feel about teaching Science?” Her tone is gruff, commanding, no nonsense. The carefully curated tough exterior of Melissa Schemmenti is back in place. But you’ve seen the slightest glimpse of the human being underneath.

“Right behind you,” you reply, and a tentative grin breaks out across your face as you stand and begin to follow the short woman. You pause briefly though, a thought entering your mind, and you turn to Barabra. Your hands grasp each other behind your back as you rock forward onto the balls of your feet, and you convey your gratitude by giving the older woman the warmest smile you can muster and uttering, “Thank you, Barbara.”

She returns your smile, her own radiant and warm, and you can’t help but feel like you’ve been blessed a bit. “My pleasure, dear. Go on, I’ll see you at lunch.” You nod in agreement, and turn on your heel, following after your lead teacher. You’re not friends - seeing as your time is limited at Abbott, you don’t imagine you ever will be. But you feel lighter, and there’s a newfound respect for the short woman. And for the first time since you stepped foot inside Abbott Elementary, you feel excited for the day before you.

-------

A/N:

Yes, I'm sorry, Gary will be briefly mentioned/perhaps even making small appearances. Stay strong lol. Controversial opinion but I don't hate Gary. Did I think he was good enough for Melissa? HELL NO. Do I think he should have respected her wishes and listened to her when she explained her boundaries? HELL YES. But ultimately he was just a big dumb guy who was infatuated with Melissa Schemmenti, and to that, I relate. Still, I wasn't mad about that split.

Fun fact - if you've watched season 3 episode 4 already, I wrote the Ava roster line before that episode aired. I died laughing when the kids were talking to Gregory about his roster. We don't need to talk about the firefighter exchange... denial is my favorite state.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Gotta admit to some confusion with the “Max is a sexist” takes? If it’s rooted in how he assumed Marinette didn’t know how to play the game, I could see a bit of merit even if there could be other reasons, especially since it happens in line with Kim’s more expressly sexist attitude of surprise. But when he loses, he congratulates her, and his upset while clear is framed as being completely due to losing his spot in the competition.

Ignoring how his anger was a part of his own private thoughts which HM exploits, Max as an Akuma targeting Marinette instead of Adrien always seemed to me to be due to the fact that she is the one who replaced him. Yes, they both beat him, but Adrien winning didn’t lead to Max losing his spot, Marinette winning did.

Also, the lesson of the day seems squarely centered around how Max deserves to play because he’s the one who really wanted the opportunity, which is why Alya as the writer’s mouthpiece scolds her beforehand about taking it seriously and cinched when Marinette explains why she’s surrendering her position. And while I’m not arguing the episode itself as whole doesn’t contain sexist elements, I feel the writers attempt to avoid that reading by having Adrien surrender his position to Marinette because she is the better player.

For Max, is there perhaps further context than Gamer that I’m just missing? Because I don’t nearly see the same amount of “Kim is a sexist” takes, and unfortunately Max being Black does put him at risk of being held to higher standards than other non-Black characters.

I will do my best to walk through the episode and explain why it makes Max read as sexist to a lot of people. (Or, at least, this is why I think people reach this conclusion. It's why I reach it.)

It's true that Max's reaction to Marinette wanting to play is potentially a little sexist because he assumes that she doesn't know how to play:

Max: The rules are elementary, You battle each other's robots with your own and... Marinette: Please... Every time you win, you loot its items and gain XP, which upgrades your mech. I'm not a noob, thank you very much. Max: Ah, sounds like you have a sufficient amount of knowledge. Let's see if it's enough to beat me.

It's hard to be sure, though, because we don't know if he tried to explain the rules to everyone. I still think it's fair to read it as sexist because it's paired with other characters acting like Marinette can't play, but I also don't think this is a big enough issue to call Max the clear problem of this episode. If he is being sexist, then he's far from the worst one in that scene and his initial reaction to loosing is excellent and without a hint of sexism!

Max: I accept this defeat. I relinquish my position at the tournament. Congratulations, Marinette. And Adrien.

It's also not even remotely sexist that he's upset by his loss and goes on to rant about it as soon as he's alone:

Max: I should've been going to that tournament. I was the chosen one! I worked so hard for it! This is Inconceivable!

While it's not sexist, I would argue that this reaction is something that he needs to work on. If Max wants to be in competitions, then he has to own the fact that he may lose them. This is an issue that we'll get to in a minute. First let's talk about what happens while Max is an akuma.

Even though Adrien and Marinette are together when Gamer attacks, Gamer is only out to get Marinette. He is obsessed with the idea that Marinette should have lost and doesn't care about the Adrien loss.

(Suddenly, the Gamer's robot appears. Marinette and Adrien notice it.) Marinette: Tell me this isn't some kind of publicity stunt for the tournament! Gamer: Well, well. Marinette, let's see who's victorious this time. Adrien: Doesn't look like a publicity stunt to me.

Gamer: Game over, Marinette! Marinette: How does he know my name? Max! (the Gamer's robot fires lasers at her) I guess he really did want that spot in the tournament!

While this makes sense since Marinette is technically the one who cost Max his spot, it doesn't change the fact that this obsession and the earlier framing of Marinette's win make the focus of the episode Max's reaction to Marinette winning. That means that the episode's ultimate lesson will be about the validity of Marinette's win.

This is where Max's part in the sexism really kicks in. Not in the pre-akuma stuff, but the post-akuma stuff. That's where this image comes from:

[Image description: Max and Marinette standing outside of the tournament arena. Max has a sad expression and is refusing to look at Marinette who is awkwardly standing behind him]

As you can see from this image, we don't see post-akuma Max apologizing to Marinette for blaming her when she didn't do anything wrong. Nor do we see post-akuma Max just generally owning his loss, promising to work on taking losses better in the future, and saying something like, "I'll just have to do better next year." Instead, we get post-akuma Max pouting and refusing to even look at Marinette.

This is hardly the behavior of a good loser and yet the story completely validates it. We go from Max pouting to this:

Alya: You bent over backwards to be in the team and now you wanna pull out? Marinette: It's just that I feel so bad for Max. And well, it just wouldn't be right. Alya:(stops her) You're doing the right thing. But honestly, it's not like you get the chance to play with Adrien everyday... Marinette: ...Max? I've thought about this a lot, and... Well, I think you should be playing tonight, Max. Max: What? Marinette: Don't get me wrong! I love gaming, but it's not my heart and soul. This is your baby. It's your tournament, Max. I don't wanna take that away from you.

The appropriate reaction to Marinette's offer is for Max to say, "No Marinette, I'm sorry, I'm behaving terribly. The school is supposed to be represented by the most skilled players. That's you and Adrien, not me. I lost fair and square. I'll work on my skills and get a spot next year." This is how you show character growth and emphasize that Max has moved on from viewing himself as the "chosen one" while unfairly blaming Marinette. Instead we get this:

Max: I don't know how to thank you.

While Max certainly isn't saying anything awful like, "damn right I should be playing you stupid girl," this ending still validates his anger towards Marinette and implies that his behavior was perfectly fine. That it wasn't wrong for him to ignore her until she gave him back "his" spot. That's the sexist element. We should not have seen Max rewarded for treating Marinette poorly and making her feel guilty for daring to win a videogame.

It's important to note that this all happens on the day of the tournament, meaning that it's been days since Max lost and yet he's still mad at Marinette. That's not a great look. At the very least, he should be equally angry at Marinette and Adrien by now. Instead, his anger is still shown to be focused on Marinette as if she is the one and only source of his problems when, in actuality, it was his double loss that cost him his spot. Marinette only knocked him out of the running because Adrien won first. If the order was reversed, then would it be valid for Max to be angry at Adrien? According to the show, I think that the answer is "no." At the very least, I don't see how you can argue that it's clearly "yes" based on what we were given. Adrien's win is treated neutrally by everyone and Adrien letting Marinette play is treated as him being kind while Marinette letting Max play is treated as her righting a wrong.

As others have pointed out, when it comes to Max getting akumatized, what difference does it make if Max loses to Marinette in the preliminaries or to someone else in the main tournament? Do you really think that he'd be fine losing at any point in this competition when he thinks that he's the "chosen one"? At what point is it not cool to hold onto the anger of losing in spite of all your hard work? And why does Marinette's motivation matter when it comes to Max's feelings? He had no idea that she was only playing because she wanted to be Adrien's teammate. All he knows is that she beat him fairly and that she now feels bad about that for some reason.

It's really important for kids to learn that hard work doesn't always lead to a win, but this episode doesn't teach that. Instead it says that it's totally fine for Max to feel wronged and that you should only compete in tournaments if you want to win for the "right" reasons, whatever those are. If you're going to go this route, then at least give Max a noble cause to contrast Marinette's selfish one. As is, he's just as selfish. It's not like he wanted the prize money to save his family from poverty! As far as we know, there is no prize money! He just wanted bragging rights.

What's even more bizarre is that Adrien gives us the lines that Max should have given:

Adrien: Go on, Marinette. You're a hundred times better than me. You belong on the team. Win the tournament for the school. I know you can do it.

What even is this mess? The episode didn't establish that Marinette was better than Adrien! We did get this exchange:

Adrien: Wow! We won again, thanks to you! Marinette: Yeah, um, yes we did. Adrien: We? That was practically all you. You're amazing, Marinette. I guess you wouldn't even need me. I'm so lame compared to you... Marinette: Um, no no no, I... No, you're so good. I mean, I'm the one who's not good. I mean... I'm lucky, that's all.

Leading to Marinette giving Adrien her lucky charm, but this isn't Adrien losing to Marinette. It's just Adrien being impressed by her skills when their team won a match. We never once see Marinette beat Adrien.

There's also the fact that the rest of the episode is focused on Ladybug and Chat Noir gaming together against Gamer, proving that they're the dream team, not Marinette and Max. The logical ending of this plot is for Marinette and Adrien to do the same thing on the civilian side because they're the dream team no matter which side of the masks they're on. Instead we validate Max's anger towards Marinette and tell the little girls at home that it's wrong to show off to boys. How feminist?

It would have played so much better if Max initially took Marinett's spot, but changed his mind after Adrien's line since Adrien's logic isn't unique to Marinette. It applies to Adrien as well and logical Max should have seen that. Why is it right for Adrien to give his spot to the better player while it's fine for Max to take a spot from those who beat him? Shouldn't the best players be the ones to represent the school? Especially when those players have actually been practicing together while Max hasn't done any co-op training? The lesson here makes no sense at all!

It's definitely true that Max isn't the only one who comes across poorly in this episode. Kim, Alya, and Rose's reactions to Marinette's initial win all also play into the "A girl? Playing video games? No way!" issue. Alya and Tikki play into the, "Marinette was in the wrong to ever play because we must be good and virtuous in our motivations and not do things to impress boys" issue. Both of these elements exacerbate how Max comes across by setting a sexist tone to the episode, but that doesn't change the fact that Max completely failed to learn a very valuable lesson, unintentionally making him look like a bit of a sexist loser even without the sexist leadin.

Max's sexism is also heavily exacerbated by some real world issues that are going to impact the way that people view this episode, so let's skim the surface of those rabbit holes because I think we have to acknowledge them to really understand why this episode bothers people.

I'm going to give you some studies here to back up what I'm saying because, when it comes to these sorts of claims, I want to give you something you can evaluate for yourself. I don't want to just talk about known issues as if they're hard facts without any proof and I prefer studies to opinion pieces or articles that mention studies without the details for you to evaluate. However, I will note that I'm limited in what studies I can access because many research papers are stupidly price locked and my public library's research database is pretty limited, so I'm stuck between that and what I can find for free online.

Feel free to reblog this or to send me an ask with suggestions of better studies or books on these topics or even on the topic of the way that black people and characters are held to higher standards because that's certainly a very real issue that's important to keep in mind! We all have unconsious biases from things like the media we watch and the only way to become aware of these biases/learn to look for them is for someone to point them out and for us to do some learning. Like I'm trained to look for sexism by my experiences, but picking up on subtle racism is much harder since I don't have a lifetime of experience to pull from. There are lots of great resources out there, the trick is finding them and maybe even accessing them as I certainly found when I was looking for studies. I'm far from an expert on gender or racial studies. My hobby research field is history.

Issue One: Female Socialization and Those Precious Male Feelings

It is a documented phenomenon that women are socialized to be nurturers. They're taught to prioritize the feelings of others - especially men - over their own wants, needs, and successes. One study on this topic focused on how success effects intimate relationships and noted that:

We find that climbing the societal ladder has positive associations with women’s well-being and relationship outcomes... however, these associations reversed for women who surpassed their partners in social status. ...Among women with higher status than their partner, traditional women intend to adjust their behavior to fit the gender norm (e.g., thinking about reducing work hours in favor of their time at home), whereas egalitarian women did not, but felt guilty toward their partner.

In other words, this study found that women have happier relationships when they don't do as well as their male partners. When they do surpass their male partners, they either try to compensate for that success or tend to feel guilty for failing to compensate.

While this study was about romantic relationships, I don't think that it's a stretch to apply it to platonic relationships, too, especially since we're talking about the messages a TV show is sending to young girls. That's where Gamer comes in. What does that episode have Marinette do when she surpasses her male friend Max? She feels guilty and compensates for daring to be better than him, reinforcing a pretty ugly gendered stereotype.

This type of thing goes beyond interpersonal relationships. It's a well-known issue that women are looked down on when they act too "masculine" in the workforce:

Numerous studies have highlighted that female leaders are evaluated less favorably than their male counterparts when engaging in identical behaviors. For example, using a job-hiring paradigm, past research demonstrated that female candidates who violated the modesty prescription by self-promoting during an interview were evaluated as less likeable and less hireable than self-promoting male candidates.

Gamer was not an instance of Marinette doing something questionable to get close to Adrien. It was her taking her hard-won skills and using them to show off to her crush so that they could get closer, a thing that Adrien was clearly 100% okay with.

This episode should not have been an instance of Marinette being show to be in the wrong. A show that aims to empower little girls should never include an episode where a girl is chastised for daring to self-promote, but that's exactly what Gamer does. It says that Marinette was wrong to put her wants over Max's feelings. What kind of girl power show sends this sort of message? How do you take a woman fairly beating a man and make it a bad thing?

If anything, the message of this episode should have been focused on Marinette being told to NOT feel guilty. After all, that's the far more likely issue for young girls to face. They will have lots of people reminding them to treat others kindly. The message could have also been about winning gracefully and been fine, imo.

Issue Two: Gender Discrimination in Male-Dominated Hobbies

It's a well documented fact that female gamers have long been treated as outsiders by the gaming community as this study discusses:

The researchers played against 1,660 unique gamers and broadcasted pre-recorded audio clips of either a man or a woman speaking... Findings indicate that, on average, the female voice received three times as many negative comments as the male voice or no voice.

Since most of that study is behind a paywall and I don't know if you can access it, I'll also give this openly available study that looked a subset of the recordings from the initial study as it gives you some fine details of what they saw. I think that this second study is a little weird in terms of what it's trying to argue, but the hard data and the research methodology seem fine and that's what I want to focus on here:

We show that lower-skilled players were more hostile towards a female-voiced teammate, especially when performing poorly. In contrast, lower-skilled players behaved submissively towards a male-voiced player in the identical scenario. This difference in gender-directed behavior became more extreme with poorer focal-player performance... Higher-skilled players, in contrast, were more positive towards a female relative to a male teammate.

There's also this study which was free through my public library, so hopefully you can find a way to access it, too, if you want to read the whole thing. For the purposes of this post, I'm just going to highlight some of the statistics and cases that it talks about during its introduction:

Recent studies have suggested that sexual harassments in online games are committed mostly by male gamers against female gamers. For example, in South Korea, one of the countries with the largest per capita gaming populations, players who play the female character Mercy in Overwatch are commonly called by an online slang, Bo-Rcy, which literally means ‘Mercy played by female genitals’ and connotes that women are incapable [of playing] the game. Also, a female professional gamer has been falsely accused of using an illegitimate tool simply because her win rate was too high for a woman.

33% of female gamers experienced gender discrimination, and 57% experienced severe sexual harassment after disclosing their genders. Furthermore, 64% of female World of Warcraft players answered that they experienced various in-game sexism such as exclusion (i.e. removing women from the game-play) or gendered flaming (i.e. using derogatory language specifically against female gamers) Also, a report documented that women are exposed to worse forms of online harassment (e.g. stalking, physical threats, etc.) and that about 44% of Internet users, regardless of their sex, agreed that online gaming is ‘more welcoming toward men’. Overall, it can be concluded that ‘video game culture is actively hostile towards women in the private as well as the professional spheres’

In other words, by having Max only ever blame Marinette for his loss, Gamer has Max acting like a tame version your typical woman-hating gamer who can't handle the fact that they've lost to a girl. This is something that I've seen myself and is part of the reason that I lost interest in online gaming. I even know one girl who had to change her in-game name because it openly acknowledged her gender and got her a ton of harassment. Of course, the guys that we played with blamed her for choosing such a harassment-inviting name because heaven forbid that a woman openly play videogames!

Conclusion

Sexism or no sexism, Gamer undeniably validates Max behaving poorly. The perception of that poor behavior is simply exacerbated by existing gender issues. These real-world problems are why people look so negatively on Max's actions. While his behavior is far from the worst gamer rage that I've ever seen, it does represent a classic, sexist issue in gaming.

If it weren't for all of the complexity around the real-world treatment of talented women in male-dominated spaces or the issue of women being taught to prioritize the feelings of others, then this episode would just be one of those episodes with a nonsense moral. For example, it would still be bad if Adrien was in Marinette's spot, it would just no longer be sexist.

However, we don't live in a world without those issues, so this episodes comes across as hella sexist and Max is the main victim because he's representing some major gendered issues that woman have to deal with. I can name so many real world moments that this episode reminded me of and none of them are happy memories. Every single one of them involves someone telling me to put a man's feelings over my own desire or comfort. This is not the kind of messaging I want to see in shows aimed at young girls.

All that being said, I don't think that Max was supposed to be read as sexist. The writers just did him dirty and made him look terrible when he could have been a wonderful lesson on taking a loss with grace and treating female gamers with respect. After all, as we've already acknowledged, Max did start out handling his loss reasonably well. The rest of the episode just completely undoes that initial good reaction, making it so that a lot of viewers will only remember Max being a pouting sore loser who gets rewarded with the thing that he wanted while Marinette feels guilty and gets lambasted by others for daring to want a spot on the team. I am not surprised that the credited writers for this one are a pair of dudes. I sincerely hope (and assume) that this was them being oblivious to a gendered issue and not anything more malicious.

[immoralkombat]

intricate rituals

Training was supposed to be finished three hours ago, and yet here Johnny is, wrapping his hands up in new bandages, getting ready to kick Kenshi's ass again.

It was Johnny's idea, naturally. After all, he and Kenshi never had a Madam Bo, so they need more training to compensate for Lord Liu Kang not giving either of them the advantage that Raiden and Lao got. Kenshi might've had the yakuza, sure, but Johnny only ever got stunt training. If this extra training session isn't for Kenshi, it's for Johnny this time.

He warms up, jumping in place as he stretches his arms across his chest. Kenshi meanwhile is practicing a couple slashes with a bamboo sword. He claims that Lord Liu Kang made him switch out his actual katana for it so that he wouldn't accidentally kill anybody, but Johnny tries his best to turn that into the belief that Kenshi doesn't want to hurt him.

It's been a month since Kenshi broke into his mansion, a month since Johnny found out that he was chosen by a literal god to defend the entirety of Earth against potential invasion, a month since he had Kenshi tied up in one of his kitchen chairs and grilled him about the history of Sento. And in that month, Johnny thinks that he's at least gone from 'mortal enemy' to 'frenemy' on Kenshi's list. They'd been bunked together at the Wu Shi ever since they got there, something that Lord Liu Kang insisted on as team-building. Johnny was lucky that he woke up at all during those first few days.

It's been three weeks since he first saw Kenshi smile at him, three weeks since he finally told a joke that landed, three weeks since he heard Kenshi call him "Cage" for the first time and it didn't sound like he was seconds away from pulling a sword on him. He thinks that maybe it's just because Kenshi has to spend time with him, or maybe it's genuine forgiveness that Johnny doesn't really deserve. Either way, he remembers it like it was yesterday, and if he weren't a better actor, it'd cause him to get flustered beyond words every time he thought of it again.

It's been two weeks since Kenshi first asked him to watch a movie together, two weeks since they started actually talking to one another, two weeks since Johnny caught him looking at him and smiling for the first time. Every time he thinks about it, it makes his cheeks warm. He has to ball his fists and leave little crescent shapes in his palms to get the blush off of his face. He wishes he could blame it on the lingering resentment he feels for Kenshi breaking into his fucking house and threatening his life, but he knows better. He knows way better.

It's been a week since Lord Liu Kang told them that the tournament was going to be in a few weeks, a week since Kenshi accidentally touched his hand while he was passing some salt at dinner and Johnny hasn't stopped thinking about it since, a week since Johnny finally came to terms with the fact that he had a bit of a crush on this guy.

It's been two hours since they last sparred. Two hours too long.

Johnny looks Kenshi up and down, an act he'll try and justify as sizing up his opponent when asked about it. "Hey, Brown Eyes Red Dragon, you gonna finally stop swinging that shit around and let me start kicking your ass, or...?"

The swordsman looks down at him. Kenshi's an inch taller than him. He shouldn't find that as pleasing as he does. "A good fighter will take as much time to prepare as they can. Something you'd know if you weren't snoring through Lord Liu Kang's lessons."

Johnny snorts. "I'm a fuckin' movie star, Keanu. I don't get time to prep. I just naturally kick this much ass."

He watches Kenshi roll his eyes and he smiles. He thinks that there's more affection behind that than it seems. At least, he hopes so.

Kenshi puts his sword back in its sheath and straightens his shoulders. His tattooed fingers flex and stretch at his sides as he rolls his neck. Thank God there aren't any mind-readers nearby, because every single thing running through Johnny's head is X-rated.

"Alright, Cage. Are you ready?"

Johnny nods, using his hands to help crack his neck. "Better question is, are you?"

Kenshi scoffs at him, his nose sneering upwards. He's even hot when he's pulling an ugly face and that's part of how Johnny knows that he has it bad. "Forget I asked."

He starts by throwing a punch while Johnny is preoccupied with staring at his sneer. It connects with his jaw and makes him draw his head back. He really should've told Kenshi that the face was off-limits, but he guesses that that's on him. He should've clarified beforehand. All's fair in complicated one-sided interest and war.

Johnny counters by going to a split and immediately tapping his nuts. He makes sure to restrain himself from going full strength because he knows that he could easily obliterate him, but he doesn't really want to do that. He thinks that maybe Kenshi deserves to have his balls. At least for now. That's completely subject to change in the future, but right now, he likes him. As expected, his tatted hands immediately go to soothe his jewels.

Johnny takes the time to get up and readjust before he goes for another hit, a kick to the leg that brings Kenshi to his knees. He tries to ignore the dirty thoughts that flood his brain when he sees him at that precise height, in that precise situation. He fails. Pretty miserably.

He looks down at Kenshi, a nice change of pace. "Gotta say, I'm a fan of this view," he says, unable to keep his ego in check.

Kenshi looks up at him with fire in his eyes and Jesus Christ, Johnny is the best actor in the world if he's gonna keep pretending that he's not already willing to do unspeakable things to this man for the foreseeable future. He lets out a long sigh, trying to figure out his next move.

Unfortunately, Kenshi seems to have already figured out what he wants to do to get himself in a better spot, which results in Johnny not even spotting the move before he's suddenly making contact with the cobblestone on the ground. He winces as he feels a particularly tall stone dig into the twinge in his back. He doesn't seem to care that he could easily have a concussion now, because Kenshi is looming over him, the sun haloing behind his head. Were he not responsible for the ache that spans the entire back half of Johnny's body, he could probably be mistaken for an angel.

"This view's more my speed," he retorts. Johnny's too occupied with the pain shooting through him to acknowledge how clever (and hot) that was.

Something he doesn't expect happens afterward; a tattooed hand extends forward and offers to help him up.

He thinks about it for a second, how easy it'd be to take it and accept mercy he doesn't deserve. It feels almost like a cinematic parallel. It's like the kindness Johnny refused to offer him when they first met. It's all of the best qualities of Kenshi, hidden beneath the yakuza ink that covers his hands. It's every reason why he fucking deserves Sento, why Johnny's dismissal is just another reason why he fucking sucks and why Cris left him. It's another reminder that he isn't John Carlton anymore.

He takes the hand and pulls him down to land on top of him.

Kenshi takes the brunt of the fall on his hands as he sticks them out to stop him from cracking his face against Johnny's big head. Johnny winces for him at the thought of how fucked up his palms are gonna be. He makes a mental note to play the hero later and help him bandage them up in their dorm after this.

Their chests are pressed against one another for a moment, too short to savor and too long to go unnoticed. It knocks the wind out of them both, and they seem to draw a breath at the exact same time, both ragged and loud.

There's a leg between Johnny's. He thanks Lord Liu Kang that Kenshi's knee didn't land high enough to bust his balls. He's less grateful for everything else about feeling Kenshi's leg between his.

"Congratulations, Cage. You've given me yet another reason I should just kill you in your sleep." Despite the words he's saying, his voice couldn't sound any more friendly and kind. It makes Johnny's heart beat just a little bit faster.

Johnny chuckles. "Oh, please. You're gonna keep me around. After all, there's no way you'd find a prettier sleep aid than me."

Kenshi rolls his eyes again, but doesn't make a rebuttal. Johnny wishes he would. That way it'd be easier. It'd be way fucking easier if Kenshi just kept bantering with him, that way he could ignore the nagging feeling in his chest.

He can't stop himself from looking down at Kenshi's lips. He knows it's a mistake even as he's doing it. He knows it's a mistake when he looks back up and sees Kenshi's eyes widen.

"You're a hell of a fighter, Last Samurai. You're lucky you caught me on a particularly bad day, y'know that right? My back hurts like a son of a bitch."

Kenshi doesn't respond.

"If I didn't have a movie career to think of, I'd keep kicking your ass."

More silence.

"C'mon, you usually got some sort of comeback by now? Cat got your tongue?"

Nothing.

"...Please, say somethin'."

"What was this really about, Cage?"

This time, Johnny doesn't have a reply.

Before he can even try to say something clever, he feels lips against his own. He lets out a surprised noise that gets muffled by Kenshi's mouth closing over his. His eyes are wide open and staring right at Kenshi, whose eyes are closed tightly as he kisses Johnny with full force. It almost feels like another attack, the force that's behind it. He feels their teeth clack together a bit on impact and he hopes that Kenshi didn't just break his nose with his own.

An inked hand moves to rest against his jaw as his eyes finally begin to flutter closed and his lips move to kiss him back. He moves his hands to rest at Kenshi's waist, every single fiber of his being screaming at him to go for the neck and bring him closer, push him down more. He needs to feel more of him pressing onto him, but he settles for a kiss for now. Kenshi's thumb smooths over his cheek. It's surprisingly tender considering that he's trying his damnedest to stick his tongue in Johnny's mouth right now. It's bold enough that Johnny lets him.

They finally start to get the hang of it after a few seconds, it seems. Kenshi finally tilts his head so that Johnny can breathe through his nose. He feels blood beginning to trickle out of it, but Christ alive, he doesn't fucking care because he's kissing him. He can taste blood in his mouth and he lets it mix into their spit, and he doesn't fucking care because Kenshi's hand is moving to grab him by the neck.

Johnny can't help but let out a hum of approval as he feels the grip on the back of his neck tighten and pull him up to rest on his elbows. He decides to let him manhandle him. He thinks that was the point of the sparring match, but he won't tell Kenshi that until they've sufficiently talked things through. He doesn't want to seem too eager, but he also wants to tell Kenshi that his hands would make for such a pretty fuckin' choker. He wants to play it cool, but he also wants to rut his hips up against Kenshi's thigh.

He settles for continuing the kiss until Kenshi pulls away.

Kenshi's dark eyes scan his face, first looking to Johnny's still-closed eyes, then to his kiss-swollen lips, and then to the blood running out of his nostril and into his mouth.

"Fuck, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that," Kenshi says. It hurts way worse than his nose.

Johnny shakes his head. "No need. Everybody ends up wanting to fuck me sooner or later. Just surprised by how quick the turnaround was for you, Neo. Usually I have to wine and dine my enemies before they start trying to get in my pants."

Kenshi's cheeks are a deep red as he gets up and the pleasant weight that had been resting on Johnny's groin is lifted with him. He turns his face away from Johnny, leaving him to look wistfully at the sharpness of his jawline. "Shut up. This never happened."

"Whatever you say, handsome. You're still not getting Sento back."

This seems to snap Kenshi out of the flustered state he's in, because his cheeks turn to a more normal color and his brow furrows. "You're lucky I left the yakuza, Cage. You'd be long dead by now if I hadn't."

He dusts off his knees, leaving blood from his palms on the cloth that covers him before he walks out. It's just then that Johnny realizes there's gonna be some of Kenshi's blood in his hair and around his neck.

He'll wear it like a scarlet letter for the next few minutes, before he has to go and shower off before dinner.

[darcytaylor]

“If somebody is close to a situation, they should have other friends that are close to the situation, they don't need to come onto social media to talk about it…”

100% agree. And anonymous people/fan behavior aside, I think this is why so many are annoyed/mad at Luke’s friends because they’re not looking out for his best interest or protecting his privacy. They post things that hint he’s with them and sometimes what’s happening in real time.

He doesn’t post much on social as it is, and yes some fans I’m sure make him want to be on social less, but his friend group is not helping. They seem like a very self-serving group and that makes me sad for Luke. Especially because he and Rory have been friends for so long.

The only person who seems to be protecting and being respectful of Luke is Nicola. Deleting nasty comments about him on her posts and even swapping out a pic she posted on her insta story to avoid more speculation about the Polaroid in her phone.

And the contrast between Luke and Nicola is she has this incredibly supportive friend group who protect her at all costs. Even throwing some shade when necessary lol.

Luke needs to surround himself with better people if he’s going to have any chance of a long career. His current group are going to ruin things for him and he doesn’t deserve that.

I know he’s done some questionable things like not promo BS3 online as much as others have but for someone who isn’t online much, it’s probably not always top of mind. Especially after doing so much live promo for months.

Anyway, just want to give my two cents. I wish nothing for the best for Luke and I think if he surrounds himself with more people like Nicola and her friends, he’ll be a big success in whatever he does. And that includes if he’s active on social or not :)

Friends are a tricky subject, because while I can look in on Luke and his core group of friends (you know the ones), I can obviously see some questionable things (like not caring about his privacy at all), but I also don’t truly know their motives or who they are as people. 

I’ve had 2 people in my life (who I had been friends with for years) that I had to cut out of my life. This wasn’t an overnight process though. It was a process of accessing situations, forgiving them, then continuing the cycle. It took me a while to even realize that there was a cycle, and that it was a cycle of my own doing.

(I have realized as I have gotten older that it's okay to drop people, but I also realize that it is never an easy thing to do)

My situation brings me to thinking that the friends aren’t solely to blame, because Luke is the one that is friends with them at the end of the day. He has chosen to stick it out with them, and let situations happen that they know fans will see. I am also sure that some things were done unintentionally and the thought process wasn’t about the fans. I like to give the benefit of the doubt sometimes.

Luke and his friends know that fans follow the group (this was even before season 3) to catch a glimpse of Luke. There should be more care regarding the optics and digital footprint that they are all bringing to the world/fanbase. Because when they post about Luke (even a hand or a leg), they are adding it to the fanbase and making it public. 

(I also think everybody should stop following these people, it’s not like any of them are doing anything of importance - that sounds mean but it’s honest)

Nicola said in her Harper’s Bazaar: Life Lessons interview, “surround yourself with people you want to be like”. It seems simple but can also be hard to do depending on where you are in life. Nicola knows who she wants to be, so she knows who to surround herself with. 

With friends you always want to give them the benefit of the doubt, you want to help them in bad and good situations, and it’s easy to look at things with rose coloured glasses in friendships (in any type of relationship really). This is especially true if you are kind, or empathetic. 

I’m sure that Luke has talked with his management and they have informed him of how things are being perceived by the public. I’m sure Luke had an idea even before a conversation had happened. Now we just have to trust that Luke understands his situation and makes the changes necessary (if he wants to) to continue to grow his career. 

[talltoontales]

// Kung Fu Panda 4 Rewrite \\

PROMPT: Kung Fu Panda 4 felt a little lacking, wanted to try my hand at maybe making it better.

PROMPT BY: Me (ToonMan)

STARTED WRITING: 03/29/2024

Alright, Ground Rules:

Jack Black’s cover of “One More Time” by Britany Spears is amazing, and I will not argue otherwise.

This rewrite is coming from my enjoyment of the series, not just bashing a “bad movie” for the sake of bashing. So, if you’re just here to hate, you’re in the wrong place.

I’m not a professional writer. I only started writing semi-consistently this year. So, take this rewrite with a massive grain of salt.

To make this whole process easier on me, no world-shattering changes.

Zhen’s still gonna be chosen to be Po’s successor

No Furious Five for most of the movie

No killing or reviving characters that don’t originally die or return.

We good? Good. Now, let’s get this party started!

/////

So, the opening fight doesn’t need to change much, save for one thing. Tigress fights alongside Po. Seeing that she’s the only member of the Furious Five to get any development in these movies and has the most chemistry with Po, it makes sense. The two beat…whoever Po fought in the intro (I think it was a stingray that could fly) and have a short dialog after explaining that Tigress, along with the rest of The Five, have moved on from being warriors and transitioned into being teachers/masters of their respective styles.

SIDE NOTE #1: I know that Po and The Five are already masters, but in my head, master sounds like a better term for “teacher” than sensei.

I like this better than having The Five be “on a mission” or whatever excuse was used to keep them from helping Po in this movie. Also, seeing that the main lesson Po needs to learn by the end is to move on from being a warrior, having The Five, his long-time heroes, retire around him helps get that ball rolling.

Po is honestly excited for Tigress and offers to support her however she needs it, just like he does with the rest of The Five. However, Tigress uses this moment to, not so subtly, ask if Po has any plans on doing the same. Po gives a vague, jokey answer before the two walk off into the title screen.

\\\\\

Back in the Valley of Peace, everybody’s celebrating Po at his dads’ noodle shop, but the celebration is interrupted by Shifu summoning Po to the Jade Place.

SIDE NOTE #2: Let me just take this moment to say that while their scenes in the movie do basically nothing for the plot, Ping and Li deserve a short or web series or something. They were seriously a joy to watch every time they were on screen together. #CoParentingGoals

First major change is why Po needs to become a master:

“As the world moves on, so must we. As to stand still is to be left and lost to time.”

Right now, Po is at the top of his game. He’s mastered Kung Fu, led and kinda trained The Five, found inner peace, beaten General Kai, and mastered Ki. However, there will come a day when Po faces a foe he cannot beat, a foe that can challenge Po in a way that he can’t adapt to, as Tai Lung did to Shifu or Kai to Master Ooguay.

Those who become Masters don’t do so because they’re past their prime; they do so because they know the world in which they thrived is coming to an end, and in the new world that follows, their wisdom becomes more needed than their fists. To lose such wisdom could be detrimental to the next generation of heroes. Of course, Po denies that he has any real wisdom to give (aside from food), only seeing his value as the Dragon Warrior. However, Shifu has never been a patient man.

The next day, Po is just messing around the palace when four warriors (No Mr. Beast Pig) attack him. During the fight, Po mocks his would-be assassins by pointing out all their errors. Shifu then stops the fight, explaining that this was a test to prove that Po is more than ready to be a master and to introduce Shifu’s candidates for the new Dragon Warrior.

Still firmly in denial, Po and Shifu go through the Peach Tree Scene the exact same way. The only difference being that when Po notices Zhen breaking in, he thinks she’s another candidate who was late or something.

A broad change I’d make that I can’t really put in writing is just to put a pinch more focus on the fight scene. KFP4 had the most out of the series at seven, but they all felt like an afterthought.

To make Zhen a bit more unique, she’s more of a “fight your surroundings” kind of fighter. She’s never standing still, never uses the same weapon more than twice, and never really fights head-on. Po can claim that she’s not fighting fair, which she’ll laugh at before he locks in and captures her. This fight being short is expected because Po is a Kung Fu legend and should have no problem taking down a random thief.

SIDE NOTE #3: Totally a personal opinion, but did bother anyone else that they named the fox Zhen? Not that the name was bad or anything, but we already have Lord Shen and those names are waaaay too similar…You know what, here’s another change. Zhen is now Vox.

Fast-forward a bit, and the two are now traveling together. Po explains how the Staff of Wisdom can’t be stolen; it must be given, and Po shows Vox genuine kindness and generosity. Vox thinks it’s some kind of long con but accepts it anyway.

The Friendly Bunny goes about the same as it did with Vox being the loot goblin she is, but I don’t want this to be an actual fight. It’s more like Po trying to keep the situation under control. Keep Vox from stealing, protect Vox, protect the helmsman, protect the bunnies, and keep the entire restaurant from falling over.

Instead of getting knocked out of the restaurant like a fool, Po uses his weight to force the patrons away from the exit, and with a mighty leap, Po exits the Friendly Bunny with Vox, the Helmsman, and the bunnies and lands on the boat like a boss. While sailing to Juniper City, Po talks about his dads, but Vox doesn’t share her backstory. Instead, mentioning how the Bunnies were safer at the restaurant.

Introducing the Chameleon and Entering Juniper City goes about the same except that Po and Vox get caught because Vox keeps casually stealing, which she does undetected, but the police only notice when Po is trying to return the stolen goods.

In the Thieves’ Den, Vox isn’t hated, but the vibe is still the same. Everyone casually messing with/ stealing from/ hurting everyone else. They find Han, who says something to the effect of “never thought I’d be seeing you again,” gives them a map of the chameleon’s temple and the scene goes on as usual from there.

/////

Alright, time for a BIG change: The Chameleon’s Motivation/ Plan/ New Name

Every other villain in the Kung Fu Panda movies has an actual name, and if I had the power, Chameleon would be named Tai Zhi for reasons that are probably obvious now but will be explained later.

Tai Zhi’s new backstory is that she was bullied, and all she could do was hide, just camouflage, no shapeshifting yet. Until one day, she learned about Kung Fu. Tai Zhi would find a master, they’d train her for a little bit, then they’d sense how evil she was and kick her out before she could learn anything actually dangerous. She then found a dark master in hopes their similar moral alignment would convince him to train her. Instead, he was the first master who refused her outright, verbally destroying her before threatening her to leave.

Tai Zhi then turned to sorcery for her claim to power but could never let go of Kung Fu. So, she found a way to open a door to the spirit realm, but there was a catch. Equivalent exchange, she’d kidnap citizens of Juniper City and sacrifice them to the spirit realm and get a D+ spirit at best in return. To get around this, she’d need the Staff of Wisdom, and she could get anyone she wanted, no matter how strong.

SIDE NOTE #4: Tai Zhi isn’t collecting the money from the mob bosses for any particular reason. It’s just a power flex. I assume she needed the gold and stuff for her cages, but they never made that clear in the original move. Plus, why would she buy the metal when she can just steal it.

\\\\\

Vox finds Po practicing Kung Fu, and Po offers to teach her. Vox doesn’t believe him, but Po reassures her he’s being 100% honest. He teaches her some basic stuff, and she picks it up pretty fast, and when she doesn’t, Po incorporates what he’s seen Vox do into his lesson. This all leads to a short spar where Vox almost beats Po but gets cocky and loses to a good ole’ fashion belly gong.

Vox questions why Po does what he does: He offers a thief a cookie, saves those who want to kill him, and teaches a thief his own moves. Po opens up about how Oogway chosing him to be the Dragon Warrior changed his life for the better. He’s made friends across all of China, found his biological dad and his people, and saved China at least three times—all just because of one moment.

Because of that, Po believes everyone deserves the same chance, no matter who they are. Those words visibly touch Vox as she almost reveals her big secret before the two are kicked out of the Thieves Den. Po and Vox sneak into Tai Zhi’s lair, and things go about the same. Now for how Tai Zhi met Vox…

Vox had been a thief well into her adult years, and a really good one, but she was tired of stealing, tired of watching over her back every second, tired of not being able to walk the city streets without seeing her face on a wanted poster. Vox wanted a new start where no one would know who she was. The problem was that most people in Juniper City were pretty poor, even the mob bosses, and Vox didn’t feel comfortable forcing someone else into poverty. So, the choice was simple: steal from Tai Zhi. Even one gemstone from her temple would set her up for life.

At the same time, Tai Zhi needed to steal the Staff of Wisdom from the Dragon Warrior, but due to all the stories she’d heard during her research, she didn’t want to risk taking him head-on. She needed a thief, and it just so happens that she knows about the best thief in the city. Tai Zhi sets up a fancy trap to bait Vox, who sees it, knows it’s a trap, but falls for it anyway. However, Vox manages to escape without a scratch until the artifact she stole is revealed to be Tai Zhi in disguise.

Tai Zhi marks Vox with a tracking spell, and while Tai Zhi could care less about Vox, there’s a pretty big bounty on her head. Not to mention, she’s stolen from some pretty powerful people who don’t really care about the reward. All Vox had to do was bring the Dragon Warrior to Tai Zhi, and she’d not only lift the curse but also let Vox take whatever she needed to disappear.

SIDE NOTE #5: I’d have Vox always scratching her neck because that’s where Tai Zhi marked her. She’d just play it off as if she had a flea problem.

Now, I don’t hate the “Villain raises a child to betray the hero” thing. It just doesn’t hit the same in the movie. We’re not given enough time to feel Vox and Po bond in the original movie. Also, if you’re like me and are unable to not analyze movies while watching them, you noticed almost immediately the aztech-esq earring Vox wore and figured out the twist.

Plus, I feel like having Vox be a reluctant thief just trying to get out of the game makes it a little easier to explain how she can betray the Tai Zhi in the end.

Now, I obviously cut the amazing Ping and Li scenes so how does Po not fall to his Death? The answer is simple: watch the Po vs Tai Lung fight again.

Seriously, go watch it. I’ll wait.

…

Done? Pretty awesome, right?!

Anyway, we can have Po swing from tree branches while fighting the lizard soldiers until he hits solid ground, or we can re-do KFP2 and have him fall into a river or large body of water. Back at the temple, Tai Zhi and Vox go through with the ceremony, and we’re keeping the bit about the blood moon—it’s honestly the funniest joke in the entire movie! Now, for the big reveal I set up a while back.

/////

Tai Zhi summons Tai Lung from the spirit realm and calls him “Master.” Before he was freed in KFP1, Zhi broke into Chorn-Gom Prison to free Tai Lung in exchange for training. Instead, Tai Lung verbally destroys her, insulted that Zhi would ever believe he needed her help. Maybe even have him almost brute force his way through his restraints just to scare her.

After Tai Lung’s death, Zhi took the “Tai” part of his name to never forget how weak and powerless Tai Lung made her feel. She steals Tai Lung’s skills and proceeds to wail on the guy, maybe even paying homage to the end of the Tai Lung vs Shifu fight, before throwing him into a cage.

Tai Zhi then releases Vox from the tracking spell and gives her a choice:

“Stay by my side and witness my rule or help yourself to however much treasure you can hold, find the farthest, darkest corner of the planet, and pray I overlook you.”

Then we cut back to Po at the bottom of the temple for the Po vs Vox scene. The only change I’d make here is just making the fight longer, showing off how much Vox has learned on this journey as well as how outclassed she is compared to Po.

Vox reveals that she is gonna to run away, and wants Po to come with her to help save as many people as they can. Po refuses but is proud of Vox and her mission, saying that if he can’t beat Tai Zhi, he’ll buy as much time as he can for Vox to escape with her people.

While Po goes Assassin’s Creed on the temple guards, Vox returns to the thieves' den and tries to convince the criminals to do the right thing because “it’s the right thing to do.” When that fails, she reminds them that if Tai Zhi is taken down, they can loot all the treasure stored in her temple.

\\\\\

As the army of thieves goes to war with the temple guards, Vox sneaks in after Po. Inside, Po sneaks around as Tai Zhi fights General Kai, noticing other warriors and Lord Shen. He’s then stopped by Tai Lung, who’s disappointed in Po and remarks how Oogway may have been wrong in the end.

Kai loses and is thrown in a cage as Po makes his dramatic entrance. Tai Zhi gives the staff back and does her “you and I aren’t so different” monolog, which Po acknowledges. There’s a possibility he could have ended up like Tai Zhi if he never became the dragon warrior (Throw in one of his villains laughing in disbelief), so he offers Tai Zhi a chance to be better than the villain she is now, to learn from him.

Tai Zhi then proceeds to mock Lord Shen, General Kai, and Tai Lung about how Po stopped all of them from achieving their goals. The mocks Po, claiming that for all the good he did, for all his adventures, no one in Juniper City and beyond has ever heard about him and that once she’s done with him, Po will become what he was always meant to be, nothing.

-OR-

Have Tai Zhi call Po weak because he needed a master to make him the Dragon Warrior. Just to have the line, “Alone I mastered magic, took over the entire criminal empire of Juniper City, defeated all of your greatest enemy and treasured masters, I am my own master!”

Now, something about the original Po vs Tai Zhi fight bothered me. Across three movies, over and over again, there’s always a moment where Po gets to nerd out over Kung Fu legends and flex his knowledge. He even figured out the Wuxi Finger Hold on his own. Yet, he’s going one on one with the ultimate echo fighter of those same warriors and his knowledge does nothing to help him. Let’s fix that.

Here’s how this fight could have gone: Tai Zhi changes into a warrior, Po does his nerd bit while caught off guard, but he then picks up on the fighting style and proceeds to body Tai Zhi in record time. Rinse and repeat that a few times and then Tai Zhi tries to use Po’s old villains which backfires horribly. Eventually, she runs out of warriors and must repeat, and with transformations getting predictable, Po starts winning the fight. Until…

Tai Zhi's frustrated that she has the forms and skills of at least one hundred kung fu legends, but she can’t beat one dorky panda. In that frustration, she loses control of her shapeshifting and mixes two forms together, catching Po off guard. Tai Zhi then starts using chimera forms to gain the advantage, but before she can deal the finishing blow, Vox swoops in and saves Po.

The two hatch a plan to make Tai Zhi so mad that she loses control long enough for Po to use the Staff of Wisdom to return the stolen skills. The plan starts to work as Tai Zhi turns into that chimera dragon form, but before Po can use his staff, Tai Zhi grabs Vox, forcing Po to save her by making Tai Zhi crash.

In the aftermath, Vox finds Tai Zhi transformed into Po, and we could have a short chase before the real Po saves Vox. Po has Vox find and bring him the staff while he fights himself, which does not go well at all. Tai Zhi traps Po in a cage before Vox can get the staff back to him.

Vox is now the only one who can stop Tai Zhi. Vox tries to fight Tai Zhi head-on like Po but fails miserably. However, Vox notices that the entire temple is fit to collapse. So, Vox sticks to the shadows, taking potshots at Tai Zhi, and every time she transforms, whoever she transforms into tells her their weakness/ tell from their cage. This continues until the temple starts to collapse, and as Tai Zhi tries to escape, Vox fights her head-on again to keep her inside (this is where she’d scream, “You fool! You’ll kill us both!”).

As the dust settles, Po stands up from under the rubble and helps Vox up, noting that he could have escaped earlier but she was doing such a good job and didn’t want to interrupt. The other spirit warriors get from under the rubble and thank Po for freeing them. As Po prepares to open a portal to the spirit realm, let’s say Master Wolf tries to sneak attack Po from behind but gets decked by Tai Lung, transforming back into Tai Zhi.

Tai Lung mocks his wannabe successor by saying; “first lesson, know when to quit.” Tai Lung then steps out of the way, and Po returns all of the skills to the spirit warriors. As they return to the spirit realm, Tai Lung acknowledges Po and what he’s become and also recognizes his “pupil,” referring to Vox. Not wanting to be outshined, though, he takes Tai Zhi with him into the spirit world, finally taking her on as his student, whether she likes it or not.

And the story ends basically the same: Vox and Po return to the Valley of Peace, Po offers to train Vox at the Jade Palace to Shifu’s frustration, and credits.

/////

Wait! One more change…

Shifu meditates under the peach tree with Po joining him shortly after that. Po can’t meditate to save his life, so Shifu questions why he’s here. Po admits that Shifu was right, that it’s time for Po to pass the torch, but also thanks Shifu. Po knows it wasn’t easy for Shifu to train someone like him, but he did, and because of Shifu, Po has never been happier with his life.

I don’t know if this will be the last Kung Fu Panda movie, but if it is, I’d like a nice moment between Shifu and Po and maybe ghost Oogway. Just wrap a nice bow on it.

///// The End \\\\\

And that’s it—that’s the rewrite. Wow! That’s a lot of words (3,573, to be exact). Like I said, I’m not a scriptwriter. I’m just a guy with a little too much time on his hands. Kung Fu Panda 4 was, and still is, a solid movie that I’ll definitely watch again, along with the other three, and so should you.

I had a total blast writing this, and I hope you enjoyed reading it.

[trailblczed]

Trailblaze Log

Amphoreus - April 26th XXXX

It's been months since Dan Heng and I have been stuck on Amphoreus. It's not the worst thing- there are fun things to do, like Chimera racing and... well, I guess that's the main thing. Sure the baths are nice, but it loses its fun-factor when it's something you do all the time. We've been here so long I also forgot what the date was- time is so difficult to track here. The sky is bright both day and night cycles- unless you go to destroyed areas or the abyss. We both had to adjust to being able to sleep with such bright lights on. We even missed March's birthday.. I hope everyone else was able to celebrate with her. It better have been something big to make up for us being absent be worthy of the "pink sky maiden". A guy snuck a peak at March's camera roll and a rumor started to spread around about life beyond the sky ( which is obviously true- but we can't tell them that.. for some reason ) and the beautiful maiden who shines like the stars. It's kind of cute, but was a headache to try and deal with the aftermath. Nearly got sent to the grave by one of the local leaders because of it. Of course March is going to cause us trouble even while she's not here! ....I know everyone's probably worried sick by now.. We haven't been able to get in contact ever since we crash landed- not for lack of trying! Dan Heng and I can obviously message each other, and we can even chat with the locals on our devices. I know it's stupid to think that I'd magically get messages sent in from everyone with birthday wishes or whatnot- I know that! I just miss them all.. This sucks. I hope everyone's doing okay, and that no one is freaking out too much about us... even if they probably should, or have every right to. Hell, if I were them, I know I would be downright sick with worry. We better be able to leave and go home soon.. or, maybe being stuck here is a blessing in a disguise. How would we be able to tell them that I-- Perhaps it's for the best.. after all, I'm only still "living" thanks to Amphoreus and it's Gods.. I hadn't noticed it really at first, but now that I know.. I can't stop thinking about it- can't stop noticing the little things that should have been a "dead" giveaway. Haha! ..I wonder if I should tell Dan Heng about the phantom pains that come and go.. No. He has enough to deal with. He already had to suffer through keeping the knowledge of my death to himself for months by himself. Adding more onto that is way more than he deserves to deal with. Speaking of Dan Heng, I haven't seen him in a while. Last I remember he was supposed to be going with Hyacine ( a person chosen by "the Prophecy" ) to go look through the big tree library for.. um- something. I can't remember not as if it's the first or last thing I will forget or not remember- There's been a lot of things to process lately.. Maybe I should just lay down for a bit while waiting on Dan Heng to come back.. try to sleep, if anything. Maybe then the aches of a body created of pure memory will go away.

Caelus sighs as he puts the quill down. Unsurprisingly, his handwriting is still a bit messy, but even he thinks he's made a decent amount of improvement since starting lessons with Vertias.

The lad wonders what the Doctor would think of all the scrolls he's filled with personal entries- of their penmanship. Maybe he'd get a pat on the back or a hand ruffling through his hair saying it looks atrocious but it's better than the last the lavender had seen it.

Caelus laughs painfully, almost scrunching up the paper he had been writing on under his shaking palms. Who knew that even without a body, your chest could still hurt so much. He closes his eyes to stop the tears that had quickly built up from falling, but it's already too late- his effort in vain as they stream down his face.

Exhausted, the silver leans forward in his seat until his head is cradled in his arms on top of the desk. Another pitiful cackle has him nearly choking on his own saliva- gagging on a whimper as he struggles and fails to stop himself from turning into a blubbering mess.

It's fine.. He's by himself- he can allow himself this moment of weakness, to let himself be so openly vulnerable and in agony. He's so tired, and just wants to take a nap- at least that's one thing about Caelus that hasn't change since he's died. It's fine, even as he sobs himself into an unsteady slumber while still seated at the small table they were provided in their private chambers.

No one has to know about his soul shattering into memory fragments- and the man being unable to pick up the pieces just yet.

[thevegaedit]

Attraction 101: Confidence Over Desperation (pt 1)

Attraction Principle #2:

The women who have men climbing the walls for them aren't always exceptional. Often, they are the ones who don't appear to care that much.

This principle can feel nearly impossible to put into practice if you struggle with insecurities. But learning to embody it is essential.

Step One: Stop Chasing

Do not:

Call or text him first.

Seem needy or overly available.

Talk about how you’re dying to get married.

Plan dates for the two of you.

As Sherry Argov says, it’s about “holding your own in a relationship.”

You might be thinking:

“But I do want to get married! I don’t want to waste my time, so I should tell him my intentions upfront.”

“I just want to share about my day or ask him to share about his!”

I get it. I’ve been there. But unfortunately, doing any of these things sends a very different message. It signals desperation—that he already has you in the palm of his hand. This will only make him wonder just how much power he has over you, how much you’re willing to tolerate, just to keep him in your life. And the harsh truth? It will erode your self-esteem even further.

A Personal Story

When I was 21, I was in a relationship where my boyfriend literally said to my face: “I have you in the palm of my hand.”

At the time, I thought it was a wild thing to say. But deep down, I knew it was true. I thought I was in love. I believed I couldn’t do better, and he could sense my insecurity—my desperation to be loved and chosen. I thought that by being extra nice, doing more for him, and proving my love, he’d eventually love me back just as deeply. But that never happened. He just kept taking and taking, offering nothing in return.

To give you some perspective: he was a high school dropout, three years older than me. I was in college, working a higher-paying job, and thought this would make me valuable in his eyes. I believed, “Surely, he wouldn’t risk losing me. I’m great!” But despite these surface-level "advantages," he knew he was in control.

Why Confidence Matters

As Argov states, “Men need a mental challenge.” This doesn’t mean winning arguments or being more educated than him. It’s about exuding confidence and self-respect. He should know—without you ever saying it—that you’re not afraid to walk away if he disrespects you.

Here are some ways to avoid looking like you have lesser value in his eyes:

Don’t be too available. When he asks when he can see you, don’t say “anytime.” Don’t rearrange your plans to accommodate him. He needs to work around your schedule.

Don’t cancel plans for him. That yoga class, gym session, or time with friends? Keep them. Let him see you value your commitments.

No late-night hangouts. Avoid last-minute or late-night “come over” invites. It’s disrespectful. Politely decline and let him know you already have plans.

Don’t pay on dates. If he invites you out, let him pay. Kindly thank him for dinner with a smile. Don’t reach for your wallet—it sets the wrong precedent.

Lessons Learned the Hard Way

In my early 20s, I made the mistake of paying on dates. For instance, on my first date with Martin, I pulled out my wallet and paid for breakfast—even though he had asked me out. I thought I was making a statement about independence, challenging traditional gender roles. And while he was pleasantly surprised, it set the tone for our entire relationship. Once we started dating, he never offered to pay. He assumed I’d cover everything, and I did—for seven whole months.

Eventually, I grew tired of always giving. When I stopped, he was confused and upset because that’s what I had taught him to expect.

Final Thoughts

Remember, being confident and holding your own doesn’t mean playing games or pretending you don’t care. It means valuing yourself enough to let him show his interest through action, not just words. He needs to see that your time is valuable, your self-worth isn’t dependent on him, and you won’t settle for less than you deserve.

You are the prize. Never forget that.

[sunnywalnut]

Like yeah it's been done before but also. Not very often. And also not very well. Because a lot of it is either

A: done by children or

B: done by adults who don't really take the source material very seriously

Which is fine. Good, even. We need new, young writers and we also need adults who still know how to think out of the box and do things in unconventional ways.

But I do love a good grueling story where they deserved every second of it. Every single ounce of blood they wept just to sizzle away from the sheer force of the heat around them that grows heavier and heavier with each harrowing minute. I want them to not be swayed by the kindness of a single stranger, but to actively choose to be better. To choose each action and decision because they know it is right, even though it does not serve them in any way.

I want them to ask questions and endure the scrutiny and punishment of doing so. I want them to choose to be different anyways. I want them to continue to turn back on the path they've chosen, but realize that they've gone too far forward and are already way too different than who they used to be. Then I want them to try and regain that control. Only to give it up once more. I want them to earn it.

Not through the actions of others, or through some magical source of empathy and sunshine. But through hard work and determination. I want them to slowly realize that the sunshine is warm, and the smell of the morning dew is sweet. I want them to sift through the red sediment at the bottom of a river and watch the water turn crimson beneath their hands and yet they find that the color now bothers them for some reason. I want them to play with it anyways.

I want them to learn, again and again, have their lessons be drilled into their skull and never leave. Like an echo in the back of their mind, always whispering to them. I want them to listen.

I want them to listen to the past, and find value in the future. I want them to cry and scream and claw their way to the very bottom of the ranks. And I want others to cower in fear.

I want them to realize this. And realize they are right.

I want their journey to last eternity.

I want it to last forever.

I want them to learn day after day that they still have to live with their past while existing within their future.

I want them to know that nothing is entitled to them.

I want them to be more than just "misunderstood" or traumatized.

I want them to be evil.

And I want them to be good.

I want them to know that every facet of their identity is fullheartedly them in every aspect, and realize that it is their duty to choose which one they'd like to brandish.

I want them to be so much more than just redeemed.

I want them to earn it.

Every second that they are alive.

Because they know what is easy.

And now they will learn what is harder.

hey uhhh but fr the concept of fallen angels existing but risen demons being an impossibility is kind of a great summary of sin in christianity

[nevernevernevermore]

It’s almost been a year since I started this tumblr and I’ve learned a lot of things privately that I, impulsively, want to document and share publicly.

1. A year isn’t a long time to heal from something.

A year ago my dream was to be healed and over the things that took me down so low. While I am in a much happier and healthier state, time unfortunately cannot heal those burns. I’ve made the best decisions for myself that I can make given my knowledge and abilities but I know there’s still a long way to go. I’m at peace with that now.

2. Purpose means everything. If I don’t feel a sense of momentum or purpose brace for impact. I’m not a person who can handle stagnancy well. I’m willing to write that off as generational trauma and not something I manifested. That understanding doesn’t absolve anything but I’m able to cope with it better now.

3. I’m allowed to be honest. I think if I could use a word to describe myself this past year it’s secretive. No one knows anything I don’t want them to. No details, no true feelings, nothing. I was waiting for it to not matter anymore but in the end I just made a prison for myself where everything matters and I just have to basically stare at it until it decides to give me some relief.

4. nevermore wasn’t just a literary reference for the aesthetic. I truly meant it from a deep place. It was a pin in this bubble I built in my head that I can be open and invite people in. No one is allowed close to me anymore. I haven’t been able to share a genuine connection. I don’t trust anyone anymore. I don’t think I ever could again. It’s become easier to trust people to do harm at this point than offer any refuge. The lesson in all of this has really just been that I can only count on me and that’s been better for my spirit. Love is not on the table.

5. I need to get better at clocking out early. No more overlooking concerning traits in people. I am not greater or above the worst thing they are capable of. I can’t just hold my head above their mind games. I would rather just not exist to them in the first place.

6. I’ve chosen to make peace that no matter how much I remind people, I just am not human to them. I will always be the drag performer they’ve twisted into being deserving of the dartboard of their mind. The over dramatic, over emotional sensitive nerve ending of a thing. I will never get that opportunity to prove them otherwise and it would be pathetic of me to try to prove it wrong. In fact I’m sure that if they got a whiff of this writing it would be in many-a-groupchat. So hi, fuck you too 🫰🏻(just in case)

7. In the end talent wins. Not over anyone else, over my pain, over my sadnesses, over all of the things that hurt me over and over again. I’m so proud of my work ethic. In spite of all this I make things happen for myself and have been able to turn dirt into diamonds over and over and over. That’s the most important thing to me. My real voice still matters over all of that.

That’s what the last year has brought me!

I’ve explored so much art over the last year. I wrote and recorded so many songs that will never see the light of day but I’m proud to stand back from just knowing that I did it to my taste level. (Which is hard to do because I do not enjoy the technical process of producing and have impossibly high standards)

I wrote hundreds of poems that I may bind a small collection of into a hardcover and share someday (maybe around the release of my collection)

Oh and of course, I’m in full-time fashion school. Which, to me, was the “invisible string” in all this. I’m taking one of my biggest passions to new levels and I hope that a year from now I can look back at this and say “that’s cunt, I can’t believe how far I’ve come, yet again”

I already have my graduate collection planned teehee.

I’ve got so much to say!

See you on the runway 🖤🪡

[soonyoullgetbetterx]

You are not the exception You will never learn your lesson

Foolish one Stop checkin' your mailbox for confessions of love That ain't never gonna come You will take the long way, you will take the long way down Foolish one Stop checkin' your mailbox for confessions of love That ain't never gonna come You will learn the hard way instead of just walkin' out

We've all been the Foolish One at one moment in time. Perhaps even more than once. When it comes to crushes and the people we fancy, somehow no matter how smart we are, we could turn into a Foolish One. I know I have.

Despite people saying I'm smart, as it turns out I am not immune to being a fool every once in a while especially when it comes to liking someone. Just like Swift said in Foolish One, I too would block out the voices of reason and gave people chances after chances when really.. they don't deserve it.

Looking back I can say that now, because now I have a better picture than when I was in that situation. I know now that unanswered messages and no plans of meeting up means that they're not into me. Instead of a sign for me to try harder. No, never try harder when the other party is simply stringing you along until someone better comes along. You deserve so much more than that.

I know it stings, but it's better than being someone's back-up option. We all deserve to be chosen and prioritised. Now I'm not saying that we need to be someone's entire world and existence -because that would be suffocating and unhealthy. But you know when someone chooses you through their actions and their words. And that's so much better than being an option. You'll see.

Another thing you'll witness is that, you are not a quitter. You have a soft and gentle hard. Never ever let the world turn it into a cold and hard heart. Uncaring is not cool. I know it seems like these days caring makes us look weak, but no, caring when you care for someone I think is brave. To wear your heart on your sleeve, making your intentions clear -they all take courage and not everyone is brave enough to do so.

So when you're one of the lucky ones who are courageous enough, I say never change. Do it. Do it one more time. Do it a million more times. The world could use more people who care. But, also know when to stop. It's nice to care, but what's also important is to be reciprocated. When all of your efforts are discarded like a penny in the rain, that's when you need to stop. You will be cherished somewhere else and it's going to be so much better -I promise.

It's like giving more air for a fish to breathe when really a dog would appreciate it more, you'd just be killing the fish because that's not what a fish needs. While doing so, you're making yourself a villain in the fish's story. It's not a good ending for anyone.

You would be suffocating people with so much love you have to give even killing them when you give it to the wrong people who couldn't appreciate it simply because of incompatibility. That's the lesson you need to learn, to find your people. To find your people and to love them with all you have, rather than loving the wrong ones and turning you cold and bitter along the way. Then having them paint you as a villain.

You are not the exception You will never learn your lesson - not with the wrong people you won't.

However, you will be the exception and you will learn your lesson once you find your people. The right ones. They will teach you what love is instead of what it isn't. They will mend your broken parts instead of breaking them. They will stay with you even when it's storms and pouring rain instead of walking out. Because they are your people and you are theirs. Sometimes in life, things are just meant to be.

Love is a strong, violent force, yet delicate. You need to learn how to dance with it. It's a gentle step swaying to songs. You need to be strong and supportive, yet gentle and delicate at the same time. Find a partner you can rely on, be the partner someone can rely on. Different steps and force to different songs. But all of them paint a beautiful picture of movements to different tunes and that's okay. We all have our own songs to dance to. I hope you'll find yours.

Don't be a stranger,

soonyoullgetbetterx

[kingboohoo37]

Fandom of the day 1. Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir

Yeah I gotta start with these two dorks.

Yes, I am a 25-year-old guy that watches a show made for little girls. So what? I've been called out for playing Pokemon for years and I never really cared what people thought so I won't start caring now xD

The Plot

For everyone who has never heard of it (even though I find that unlikely): The basics of the plot revolve around these two teenagers who had magic jewels handed to each other that come with little creatures that transform them into superheroes. Together they have to stop a certain supervillain from terrorizing Paris. He only has one goal: to steal the magic jewels from Ladybug and Cat Noir.

The greatest plot point? Marinette falls in love with Adrien. Adrien falls in love with Ladybug. While Marinette turns into Ladybug and Adrien into Cat Noir, neither of them knows who is truly behind the mask of the other which basically makes it so that they are in love with each other but neither of them knows it xD

The Characters

Let's skip over the 2 important ones. I don't want this post to be too long.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng / Ladybug

The main character of this series is honestly one of the greatest main characters I have ever seen in any series.

In English she is voiced by my favorite voice actress btw, which is Christina Vee. (Yes I am very interested in knowing who the voice actors are)

She always tries to help the people around her to the best of her abilities no matter how small the favor might be. The issue? She is very clumsy. The things she does don't always turn out to be the way she wants them to. While she has a good heart and is quite strong, she is also a deeply flawed character. She too gets overcome by feelings like anger and jealousy and sometimes has to learn a difficult lesson from her actions.

She is the one that'll turn into a superhero, as she was chosen to be the next Ladybug, a superhero with the power of creation.

2. Adrien Agreste / Cat Noir

Things were much different for Adrien. He too suffers from being way too nice even to people that probably wouldn't deserve it. Mostly because of his mother.

Being the son of an extremely rich fashion designer and his mother having disappeared years ago he lives a very sheltered life until he is finally allowed to go to school. On top of that, he is chosen to be the next Cat Noir, a superhero with the power of destruction.

When he turns into Cat Noir his character changes rapidly from a rather oblivious and nice boy to a guy who cracks the unfunniest jokes ever made and constantly flirts with Ladybug.

His voice actor Bryce Papenbrook is also known for a few awesome other roles and does a great job at portraying the character.

Why is he so great? He is basically everything that Ladybug isn't. At moments when Ladybug's temper gets the better of her, he stays calm and rational. But sometimes he's also way too blunt and the lack of social skills shines through. His blind trust in her makes these two a great duo though.

Summary

Miraculous currently has 5 seasons and is still in development but until now this is probably one of the most passionate fandoms I've ever seen. Ladybug x Cat Noir is a fantastic ship that has a lot of cute and amazing but also dramatic fanfictions.

What I love about it is of course the characters as I mentioned before but the twists the story goes through aren't half bad either. But the biggest point for me was the strong similarity to Spider-Man in keeping a secret identity and having a sense of responsibility. It is a trope that I truly love and can't really get enough of xD

What makes Miraculous so popular was probably the love square:

The amount of creativity that this fandom has is sheer endless and there are a lot of really good fanfictions out there.

So if you got some spare time and are a sucker for romance, and complicated relationships but also action, and superheroes this might be something for you.

[tarydarrington]

This is the third time this week.

The Archmage of Civil Influence sits slumped over her pristine, deep red desk with her head in her hands. She can handle Ludinus. The man gives her a long enough leash, so long as she gets the right things done with it. She can even handle Professor Widogast, absurd as his new name might be, tiring as his constant pushing of the line between acceptable lesson plans and light treason might be. No, it’s not him. It’s his friend.

“Hi, Astrid!”

She presses her fingertips into her temples. Twenty-five words feels like more than one might think. Twenty-five and then twenty-five more and twenty-five more and on towards infinity feels like an eternity. Occasionally, for a while after Ikithon’s trial, she had received a friendly hello from Ms. Lavorre. That had been irritating enough. But from what she understands, the tiefling and two others are now at sea dealing with their own issues.

Veth Brenatto, on the other hand, seems to have absolutely nothing else for which to use her spells.

“How ya doing? Just checking in about that little get-together we talked about.”

Talked about is a generously mutual way to put it. There is an event planned for the end of the week at the dance hall she and Bren used to frequent. Brenatto is of the persistent opinion that she ought to attend with Professor Widogast. As his date.

Ridiculous, as she had snapped to Eadwulf last night, because if anything he would be her date - but that is beside the point.

“I know Caleb is waiting to hear a ‘yes,’” the voice in her head continues in its usual overly chipper tone.

Astrid does not believe for a second that “Caleb” is doing anything of the sort. They pass one another in the halls of the Soltryce occasionally, and their interactions are always a coin-flip between professional and very awkward. The only other time they see one another at all is when he’s dragged into her office for going on one of his famous little tangents in class, and he hardly seems interested in her authority, let alone her companionship.

“Good afternoon, Frau Brenatto,” she says smoothly, thankful that the woman can’t see her face. “As I have previously informed you, I would be happy to discuss this with Bren himself. Do have a pleasant day.”

She hopes it sounds sufficiently final, but allows herself a sigh as the halfling’s voice filters back into her mind a moment later.

“Caleb is very shy,” she says. “I think you intimidate him - which is silly, because he’s extremely powerful - but if you could just give me your answer--”

Astrid cups her face in her hands, fingers splayed. Only three more days until the dance has come and gone, and then she won’t have to deal with this anymore. Until the next time, of course. Or until Brenatto comes up with some other pretense to push them at each other.

“As I have said,” she says pointedly, “I would like to be sure that this invitation is coming from Bren. If he wishes to speak-” and he will not- “then we may.”

The next message is almost immediate this time, and Astrid resists the urge to bang her forehead onto the desk.

“Why don’t we go visit him together?” Brenatto asks with renewed enthusiasm. “Have some lunch, talk a little… I can leave you alone, if you two lovebirds are getting--”

Never before has she been so grateful for the limits of a Sending spell. She clears her throat, eyes falling on the stack of paperwork waiting in front of her. There is actual work to be done. Actual important work that does not involve a halfling jabbering in her head all afternoon. And, well, if confronting Bren directly about this nuisance could put an end to it?

“Very well,” she says on a sigh. “When shall we meet?”

Astrid wants to groan out loud at the ecstatic tone of the next message. They plan to meet tomorrow evening. Brenatto is already in town, for some reason Astrid doesn’t bother remembering, and they’ll arrive together at Bren’s little residence on the outskirts of the capital at sunset. Ostensibly, Veth will treat them all to a meal at Bren’s favorite establishment - but Astrid suspects things won’t get that far.

At least she can finish her paperwork, now.

She buries her face in Eadwulf’s shoulder that night and groans, “Why does she never do this with you?”

The following evening, she finds Veth Brenatto on the road outside Bren’s place, waving on her tiptoes with a wide grin splitting her face. Astrid gives her a tight, mirthless smile in return. Better to get this over with.

“I’m so happy that the two of you are getting some proper time to get to know each other again,” Brenatto says as they approach the door together.

Astrid will ignore the suggestive tilt of her eyebrows.

Bren’s place is smaller than those of most of the Academy’s faculty. He is one of the only professors who has chosen to live outside of the city center, opting instead for a little-travelled section of Rexxentrum to the northeast. The house itself is small and nondescript; she would never have picked it out, if she didn’t already know it was here. Astrid wonders sometimes about the secrecy, but she will let him have his privacy. She owes him that much, at least.

She shakes herself from her thoughts just in time to notice Brenatto reaching for the doorknob, but not soon enough to stop her from opening without a single knock. By the time she’s reached out to stop her, the door is already wide open.

And oh, this is rich.

“Caleb! I brought--” And then Veth sees them, too.

The man in question - Caleb or Bren or the physical manifestation of regret, whichever he pleases just now - has just fallen off the couch. Brought tumbling down with him is the drow with whom he’s intimately tangled up, face twisted into such a comical mix of shock and mortification that Astrid actually cracks a smile.

“Ah,” Bren says, pulling a blanket from the sofa to wrap around his partner’s shoulders, “Hallo, ja, come right in.”

The drow, for his part, has already waved a hand and magicked them both some clothing. Brenatto, for hers, has begun sputtering incoherently - which, after the week of endless pestering Astrid has had, sounds about like music. Astrid gives her a smug look, and gestures with one hand towards the two men hastily righting themselves.

“I believe this settles the matter,” she says coolly. “Thank you for the invitation.”

She gives Bren a knowing look, and he gives her a tired nod back. She doesn’t envy him the interrogation he’s about to endure. With a parting glance at the drow, who has retreated toward another room with his real clothing clutched just a bit too tightly in his hands, she turns on her heel and steps back out into the dusk.

That explains the secrecy, then. She hopes he’s good for Bren, whoever he is. He deserves something good.

Just as the teleport whisks her away, she hears Veth Brenatto screech, “Him?!”

[regrettablewritings]

Hi! May I request 2, 9, 12 and 13 for Poe?

Absolootely!

2) Who they want to please the most: Those boyish good looks and cocksure attitude make it easy to assume that the Resistance’s Gold Boy has nothing and nobody to prove himself to. However, this isn’t entirely true. Sure, he can be confident to the point of foolhardiness at times but it must be clarified that nearly everything Poe does (or attempts to do) is rooted in one way or another to his desire to see a task through and assure that whomever he’s doing it for is satisfied. Of course, the problem with that sort of ambition was just how stable it was; it was almost always assured to come back and bite the poor fellow at some point.

This was especially in cases where Leia Organa was involved.

Poe made no attempts to hide how much he admired the general, both as a leader and as a second motherly figure to him. And while his occasionally reckless attitude towards turning the tide would often be a thorn in her side, Leia knew deep down that this behavior was born out of love: The young man just wanted to see the war end and help to bring about a new era of peace and potential. It was admirable on a data pad, of course, but in practice . . . Suffice to say, she’d made it abundantly clear that she didn’t approve of it.

It might’ve taken longer than what she would’ve liked for the lessons to stick, but Poe did eventually yield and start acting more like the person she needed for him to be: A real leader, and not just some ace pilot who could fly in and out of problems. And for that, he was grateful: Leia Organa might not’ve been the one to teach him to fly, but it was through their bond that she was able to direct him towards a new purpose, one that the child version of him never would’ve imagined.

But with Leia gone, who was left?

His people, of course: Friends, chosen family, all one and the same to him after all they had endured together. He wants, no – he needs to protect them, to give them the life he knows they want and deserve. It pains him to know that it won’t be easy and that tough decisions have to be made in the face of it but at the end of the day, Poe genuinely wants to help bring people to happiness. He just can’t be the only one to deliver it, as much as he wishes he could.

9) What calms them when they're upset: If there was to be one word to describe Poe Dameron, the most apt would arguably be “passionate”. After all, it could be used in both the positive and the negative.

For the positive, it captures his dedication to whatever he puts his mind to; his smile that burned with the brightness of a golden sun; the infectious enthusiasm he tried his damndest to project to his crew. But for the negative, it carried just as much weight: The hits the Resistance took always seemed to hit even harder for him; the stress he bottled up was tenfold when compared to most others’ intake; and whenever that bottle finally cracked or straight up broke, how he’d respond could be fiery. He hadn’t done it as much as he marched onward in his adult years, but there had definitely been times in the past where his stress and anger got the better of him.

A mission he failed, a flight maneuver that resulted in more damage to his ship than what could be easily dealt with, grave news, and so on: His language becomes snappy and those gorgeous eyes of his would become icy cold. Occasionally, something would get damaged, be it something tangible or the overall vibe of the room in which he chooses to hover around in. Not helping his mood would be when someone (usually Leia) would have to pull him to the side and give him a firm reminder that he’s not the only one suffering. This wouldn’t be to diminish his feelings, but to instead remind him how he’s not alone in them: Everyone is just as upset as he is, and everyone wishes they could do more. He’s not alone in this. But he can’t keep acting out or else he will be, and people are relying on him.

They need to be sure that they can count on him. Leia needs to be sure that she can count on him.

Admittedly, he’d feel a bit ashamed upon grounding himself. Definitely embarrassed. But it’s something he keeps in mind whenever he feels the pressure inside rising.

This somewhat transforms once Leia passes, meaning that he relies more than ever on his peers to help ground him when he feels himself beginning to metaphorically rise to the atmosphere. In addition to this, however, he also tries to look more inward. That is, after all, where memories of what Leia and his own mother, Shara’s, voices are.

He can hear Leia, in her own brusque way, telling him to slow his ride and calm down. He can hear what he remembers his mother sounding like, reminding him that he needs to keep moving forward because if he dwells in whatever’s bothering him, he’ll never make it out. And while it may not necessarily calm Poe so much as it does motivate him to progress in spite of everything, it’s still a mechanism he turns to when he’s by himself.

In short, what grounds this high-flyer is being reminded of those whom he loves and knowing that he can count on them because they count on him.

12) How they sleep: When you are fighting in a war and especially are considered an enemy of the (tyrannical) state, you’re not exactly in a position where you can be especially picky about your sleeping arrangements. Not that Poe has ever been picky about such a thing. He’s not the most immediate of sleepers when compared to some, but he’s capable of eventually falling asleep if given an appropriate amount of time. Heck, give him enough time and he’ll eventually claw some rest out of a nap on top of gravel. It’ll be a very light sleep, of course, but that’s still a rather impressive feat all things considered.

When it comes to positions, he tends to sleep on his back. He usually has an arm tucked behind his head like a secondary pillow (or flat-out pillow if he can’t roll up a jacket). Light snores. If he’s tired enough, though, his mouth hangs open just enough to reveal his cute, crooked teeth.

13) What kind of parent they would be: When I use the phrase “Fun Dad”, what I’m referring to is Poe Dameron.

This guy is The Dad. In a modern setting, he’d be the guy to pick up his kid from kindergarten, buckle them up in the minivan, and go, “This is your captain speaking, prepare for lift off in 3 . . . 2 . . . 1!” And then safely pull out of the carpool lane while his kid gleefully squees and waves their hands in the air like their daddy is actually flying at the speed of light. The kind of dad who’ll take his kid to grab ice cream after the first day of school so they can tell him all about their day. The kind of dad who’ll bribe his kid into going back to bed if he lets them have half of a cookie while Mommy isn’t looking. (Mommy knows.)

But in the current setting? You know this man is teaching his kid how to fly as soon as his spouse says gives the okay (though he’s definitely reading them manuals and flight routines as bedtime stories before then). If flying isn’t their thing, he’ll be a bit saddened, but he’s not going to let that get in the way of them bonding. So then what are they into? He wants to know! They don’t know yet? He’s gonna help them find out!

I think part of what contributes to this enthusiasm is that as optimistic as Poe tried to be throughout the war, he still didn’t necessarily picture his life being like this. Or maybe he did, but it wasn’t until it actually happened that the weight of it all truly hit him. Either way, his kid is the absolute light of his life – the very best thing he ever did (and he only gives winning the war somewhat of the same credit because if he hadn’t, they might not’ve existed).

Speaking of, stories about the past are going to play a big role in his child’s life, be it from Poe telling them about his youth or about their late-honorary grandmother, or from their slew of aunts and uncles telling them about how Poe was during the Resistance. They’ll hear all kinds of stories about how brave their dad was, the crazy schemes he would get involved in – and unlike most kids, they would find it rather easy to believe, given that Poe would still hold most of the enthusiastic outlook as portrayed in the stories. Of course, he’s grown since then and doesn’t want his kid making the same reckless decisions he made.

However, that doesn’t mean he'll go overboard and shelter them: Mistakes, he’s come to accept, are a necessary part of growing up, and he doesn’t want his child to resent him for denying them the right to explore both the world around them and themselves. But if they wander too close to the edge, they can be assured that he’ll be there to pull them back into safety.

And, depending on how bad they messed up, scold them. (After which, it would hit him mercilessly that “Oh, sweet Maker, I’m becoming Leia.”)

Aaaaa sorry this came out so late but thank you so much for your patience!!!!

[wickedgamesoyaoya]

❧ 27. lessons

❧Masterlist - Previous - Next

❧ A/N: I love reading what everyone thinks bc it’s either like ‘wooohoo iwa!!!’ or ‘fuck this MAN’ AND I DIE EVERY TIME. 

When Iwaizumi offered to walk you back to your hotel, the little voice in your head shifted its tone. Disgust coated the warnings that sliced through your mind and any sense of security your best friend’s words had produced was dismantled in seconds. At first when you saw Iwaizumi and interacted with him, you felt in control. You felt confident in yourself and your ability to draw lines when appropriate. The lessons associated with the athletic trainer remained fresh in your mind - you knew what you wanted from a relationship now and you would not forget it. 

The issue was that your conversation with Kuroo had created small cracks in your sense of self. His lack of belief in you had stung far more than he probably realized. You genuinely valued his opinion, and that was precisely why your mind was in a state of disorder. You valued his opinion so damn much, that the voice inside of your head was no longer yours - it was his. 

And it was for that reason why you had to accept Iwaizumi’s proposal. You had to tell the world who you were, or else it would continue to define you in a manner that you did not consider fit. 

“Thanks for not running away from me today.” Iwaizumi was the first to speak up after you two exited the restaurant. Usually he didn’t mind silence, especially during walks at night. But there was just simply too much he wanted to say to you, so he bravely broke the silence only thirty seconds into the walk. 

“I’m not the one who runs away from problems, Iwaizumi.” A feathery laugh shadowed your response, but the male could not help but feel embarrassed at the message underlying your words.  

“Yeah. I was a big idiot for that.” Rubbing at the back of his neck, he tried to resist the urge to curse under his breath. “For the last month all I’ve done is think about how badly I fucked up. How I could have avoided all of this shit if I used my damn brain.” 

And how he could have been kissing you, instead of missing you every second of the day. 

A thoughtful hum vibrated inside of your throat as you nodded to indicate your understanding. It was good to hear that he too used the time to reflect on his behaviour. People who reflected over their actions were far more redeemable than those that simply made excuses for their behaviour. 

“It’s funny because when I was younger, I never schemed with my friends. I was the only one who didn’t. And I somehow managed to think scheming would be a good idea now.” The disgust he felt towards himself could easily be traced along his features. And as you peered up at him to demonstrate that he had your undivided attention, he could not meet your gaze. “It’s crazy how you can lose who you are because of a shitty relationship.” 

Pressing your lips together, you averted your consideration towards the concrete below. Of course you knew that much too. Losing yourself in the process of trying to find love was kinda your specialty. But your time with him was truly the last straw. That was why you were prepared to take the lesson and leave forever. Or so, at least you thought you were prepared to complete the latter part. If anything, the last few hours had shown you that while you had distanced yourself from him, you still cared. 

Even though you had chosen to walk away, you were still glancing back, waiting for him to meet you again, once he was ready. 

“Not that I’m saying you’re the reason I changed! I meant my ex. Takara.” Iwaizumi blinked down at you, mentally scolding himself for leaving his last statement so vague. “She... fucked with my head so good that I didn’t realize I changed. I ignored my friends when they told me I changed. I only started to believe it when I met you. When I realized I was being an asshole to someone who deserved way better.” 

“I understand, Iwaizumi.” 

Yes, you understood him on levels he possibly could not comprehend. But did that change the history you two shared? Did that change the fact he toyed with your heart and acted like a child? Did his supposed character development mean that you should give him a second chance? 

Hell, was he even asking for one? 

“But I guess maybe you’re not asking for my understanding.” Biting on the inside of your cheek, you tilted your chin up to catch his eyes.  “Well, if you want my forgiveness, you have it.” 

To your surprise, it was not relief that washed over his visage, it was anguish. 

“I didn’t even say I’m sorry yet and you’re forgiving me?” Pausing in the middle of the sidewalk, he swallowed harshly. His chest was inflamed, and the gentle smile ghosting upon your lips only drove him further insane. 

“You may have not said the words, but I got the point.” After smoothing your palms against your outfit, you lifted your shoulders into a small shrug. 

“Don’t forgive me yet. I don’t deserve it.” Iwaizumi wanted nothing more than to capture your hands in his, but he knew he shouldn’t. And to distract his twitching fingers, he curled them in towards his palm. “Let me make it up to you first. Let me show you I can be better. Then you can forgive me.” 

For a moment you merely stood stuck in your spot, unsure how to react to his counter position. A normal person would have happily accepted your forgiveness. But Iwaizumi was dead set on making it up to you - he wanted to be worthy of your forgiveness, and that fact alone had your heart beating erratically. 

“We can’t keep starting over. I don’t want to keep acting like we’re starting with a blank slate.” 

“I don’t want to start over, y/n. I don’t buy into that crap anymore. I know I fucked up, but now I want to show you that I can be better. Let me care about you the way you deserve.” His throat constricted painfully as he proclaimed his last sentence. He didn’t know how to convey his feelings in any other way. This was the best he could do, and he had to hope it would be enough. 

After another thirty seconds of silence, you slowly nodded your head. 

“Okay.” The confirmation was exhaled softly, contrasting the blood roaring inside of your ears. 

Were you giving in too fast? Oh god, why were you giving in so fast? Why did you care so much about him? Why - 

“Thank you, y/n. Thank you.” The smile twitching upon his mouth was faint but it showcased just how much your concession meant to him. “Can I ... hug you? Please?” 

After catching your second nod, he loosened his fingers and stepped closer to you. And as he brought you into his embrace, your mind was consumed by a single thought. 

Please don’t break my heart. 

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[if you were removed/want to be added, please leave me an ask]

[acacia-may]

Finral for the ask game please ^^

Thank you for the ask, dear! 🥰 This post got a little bit lengthy so I've included the heacanons below the cut!

(Warnings: briefly mentions drinking/drunkenness, mentions some spoilers for the Royal Knights Exam, and briefly mentions childhood trauma)

Questions from this 4 Headcanons Ask Game

Headcanon A:  realistic

Finral can play the piano because Ledior and Liliane forced both him and Langris to have lessons in order to increase their chances of one of them being chosen for a betrothal with Finesse (since Finesse loved music and being able to play an instrument made Finral and Langris look more accomplished). Finral had a lot of natural talent because his mother was a gifted pianist, and he was determined to learn how to play all of the sheet music he found that once belonged to his mother in order to feel close to her. (A/N: I developed this headcanon with a fellow writer, but it's one of my favourite headcanons I have for Finral so I'm sharing it here).

Headcanon B: while it may not be realistic it is hilarious

Finral is a lightweight and a weepy drunk who often spills everyone's secrets (including his own) if he has too much to drink. He struggles to keep a secret on a good day, but if there's alcohol involved, forget about it.

Headcanon C: heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends

Finral doesn't think he'll ever be able to forgive himself for leaving Langris alone in House Vaude, especially since he knew better than (probably) anyone else how toxic that environment was. Though he was completely justified in leaving and protecting himself, he struggles to see and understand this, and he blames himself for how much Langris suffered and was corrupted by being stuck in that abusive situation. Finral genuinely thinks he deserved being maimed and ending up comatose at the Royal Knights Exam, but even that (very warped and incorrect) line of thinking isn't enough to assuage his overwhelming guilt at not being able to protect his younger brother.

Headcanon D: unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own.

Finral doesn't actually want to be the head of House Vaude, though he genuinely believes he does. He isn't suited for that kind of life--the stress of running a noble household and managing its investments, playing politics with the Clover Kingdom nobility, searching for more opportunities to bring honor and prestige to the House, spending hours in the Magical Parliament ect. just isn't for him. However, he is pursuing this for three main reasons: (1) he thinks it's what he is supposed to do: his responsibility as the eldest son of a noble family, (2) he thinks this the only way to finally earn the love, acceptance, and acknowledgement of his family, and (3) he feels incredibly guilty for leaving Langris alone in that house and thinks the only way he could even begin to try to make it up to him is to give his brother an "out." (Needless to say, he doesn't have a very realistic view of the situation and doesn't really realise that everything isn't going to work out the way that he is envisioning). Even in the event that Finral did actually have "desirable magic" by his family's standards, he would have still at least pondered the idea of abdicating because this isn't the kind of life he would want for himself. [However, in that case, he probably would have never left or entertained the idea too long because he feels this is the life he was given so he doesn't have the option to want or pursue anything else]. If he does become the Head of House Vaude in the canon, he is in for a rude awakening. I like to think he'll eventually adjust and learn to be happy in that life, but he may not be as happy as he could have been in a different one.