#the problem being my hyperfixation on them | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

killjpeg · 3 days ago

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I think it's very funny that this is the only significant post i made on that blog and is the only reason the blog is still up. It's been a while and rereading this I think some of my thoughts had changed, having come down the high of hyperfixation I had and bias. All and all I still stand by pretty much all of it, but here are some points I want to correct/elaborate more on:

"Unless when Shockwave said he was going to give Megatron a gestalt he meant he'll postpone it for 4mil years and do it a little before he succeeded with Devastator so Ambulon deserting LITERALLY as he is picked out for the combiner project JUST to avoid it"

I already put the examples in the post a little after this but this is not too farfetched Shockwave was taking his time with the gestalt, as he literally says it's not his first priority. I think I'm more accepting of the thought that Ambulon was a volunteer, but for me I'll stay by the idea that his MTO team was built long before being experimented on for the gestalt - as the problem seems to be their inability to "connect" mentally that Shockwave also was trying to fix. The reason why I'm so set on this is the way Ambulon explains his name:

"Ambulon: from the verb 'to ambulate', meaning 'to walk about'. It's a stupid name..."

To me diegetically it comes off as something he was told rather than having any choice in the matter. As well as talking about his alt mode as something he was "born" with instead of being made into without his consent.

And for us it was meant to serve as a twist that his name is not formed from an "ambulance". All things considered, it works anyway, so it wouldn't even make sense he'd be so upset about it - which just cements it for me that he was told what his name explicitly means to him and not other way round.

"I'm gonna also get this out of the way that Ambulon's established character is continuously ignored, dumbed down and twisted: the point is that I do believe JRO didn't think about him that much or that deep, and what he did with him did not retain with him into further issues. That is to say, "You're gonna let Dr DJD cut us in half?" is a dumb fucking line to come out of Ambulon specifically, makes no sense, too snarky and cruel all things considered, and while I think it's also very funny it jsut shows Ambulon's accidental insignificance. Ok. That's all."

I'm going to completely back off from this point mostly because it was majorly charged from my bias towards his character and a lot of distaste for JRO (which i still have but its neither here nor there).

In-story it makes sense to me he'd react uncharacteristically and snarky when his life is literally on the line - if anything it serves to show how mean he can be when put in a high stakes situation, and obviously he'd be pissy about Pharma betraying all of them. I wonder if it was an in-joke between him and First Aid for a bit as a way to cope with the fact their boss killed people and tried to kill them allegedly (even though there are good reasons to believe Pharma didn't and wanted all three of them to leave).

Like it doesn't remove my point that his character was not considered of thought into deeper than what we got in those first issues but it doesn't contradict his character either.

"You see, I think Pharma is incredibly caring person. He cares for his patients and he cares for his people. He takes his work extremely seriously. He's willing to be a donor for his patient and he's still conducting research to cure illnesses when there was no legitimate point for him to do that anymore. He's not just a surgeon, but he's a virologist/epidemiologist."

Here I just want to elaborate more cuz I got some new thoughts on the matter.

Medics in MTMTE story ultimately have an overlapping theme of purpose that many other character don't exactly have. While the theme of purpose and shape is a prevalent throughout the whole story, it is especially emphasized with the medics and their inherent ability for healing, their hands. It puts them in a very narrow idea of what they're supposed to be doing with their life. You can choose to be a doctor but not if your shape doesn't permit it (ur a jet) but if you have good hands then sure you can try. This is where a Pharma dilemma coming from and is very interesting to me.

Pharma is more than anyone is defined by his desire to fulfill his purpose, because he doesn't see himself outside of it, an even bigger extreme than what we saw of Ratchet. He's so dedicated to asserting his place in the world he ruins his life about it. He does not want to be viewed as lesser than, his ego is keeping him from reaching out, and the kinda person he is just puts him into position where all he can do is double down.

And I've rambled on about my point (because I wrote the entirety of the original post in one sitting) too much that I feel like I didn't elaborate it even close enough.

Ambulon and Pharma are driven by their desire to serve a purpose, while both defying what that "purpose" even means. Neither of them by the facts we're given in text are supposed to be doctors - they're not the right shape for it. But nevertheless, they are doctors. But for Ambulon, he is choosing his purpose and his place in the world, while Pharma has rushed himself into a corner. Pharma in desire to chase his purpose and assertion of his value has put aside why he's doing it - because he does care for people, he doesn't actually want anyone to die and suffer, but in a circumstance where his interests are being challenged, he chose what's best for him, specifically, hoping it just works out for others in the end.

Their Amica Endura could've been defined by enhancement of each others strong points, of Ambulon being Pharma's anchor from spiraling and letting his flaws drive his actions, and Pharma sympathizing with Ambulon's dysmorphia and giving him respect he deserves for his achievements, despite DJD, despite what functionism dictates, that Ambulon stays faithful to his oath as a doctor.

I genuinely don't think there's anyone who would understand them better than they would each other, in a better world.

Of Ambulon and Pharma and doomed amica endura

I'll preface that I'm the last person to try and explain my ships by how canon they are and this is very much the same case of me just entertaining the idea and what their relationship represents and what role they play in a wider story, this is not an invitation for discourse or a debate. It's just me rambling on why I like the ship so much, think Pharma and Ambulon are narrative foils, while using some canon stuff and word of god.

Jokes about hamburger or hot dog or literally anything regarding Ambulon's death will end in block idc I think it's obnoxious 👍

CW for robot gore, discussions of torture, you know, the package that comes with DJD and Decepticons and MTMTE.

When it comes to Ambulon and Pharma's relationship, I think it's fair to start with bare bones, yeah?

I'm going to start with each character individually, what my take on them is, so we're all on the same page.

Ambulon

So, the basics are:

Ambulon was part of the failed combiner project of decepticons, the first combiner at that. He has horrible alt mode, that brings him a lot of shame, so he prefers to keep it a secret. He switched to the Autobots, eventually.

We don't know for certain if he was created for the project, or was one of the "volunteers". What we do know though, is that he's an MTO specifically, not just constructed cold, and MTOs were a concept of war.

Meaning, he cant be older than the war. Meaning, in my personal opinion, he was either made for some operation, then snatched by Shockwave for the project, or was created already specifically for the project.

There, I think, comes a timeline conflict. It feels unfeasible, to me, that MTOs were made this early into the war, by Decepticons. What I think happened, is that Shockwave did try to experiment on other Decepticons to figure out and develop on Jhiaxus' research, but once MTOs as a concept came into the picture, it became infinitely easier to just have an alt mode pre-made for a mech.

Unless when Shockwave said he was going to give Megatron a gestalt he meant he'll postpone it for 4mil years and do it a little before he succeeded with Devastator so Ambulon deserting LITERALLY as he is picked out for the combiner project JUST to avoid it makes this line from him especially funny:

Boy for all we know you're not even 15 years old.

Also the idea that character like Ambulon did that out of some sort of cowardice, that THIS was his breaking point to join Autobots, feels wrong.

In-text it becomes even less likely Ambulon had a life before the project, as his name "Ambulon" seems to be the only one he ever had (judging by his statue post on Necroworld).

I think why I'm getting a Little long-winded explaining Ambulon is to draw a better picture on his experience with Decepticons, Specifically Shockwave.

That to say, he had a horrible one. He knows better than anyone what Decepticons are capable of and how far they will go/what Megatron would allow. Especially once DJD comes into the picture.

And it just emphasizes the way Ambulon in the end of it all chose kindness. The first issues he appeared in cement it very well, especially since most of his intro we get from First Aid's point of view.

Ambulon is tetchy, can be a gearstick sometimes

Ambulon took pity on the Decepticons he thought were hunted down by the DJD

Ambulon convinced Pharma to let them stay

The Genericons showed their scars to Ambulon specifically

Ambulon gets passionate about hate crimes concerning one's shape/alt mode

Ambulon is "tetchy" and rejects First Aid's idea because he's concerned that it's too risky

For Ambulon to put your own life on the line to save a single life is an act of selfishness (also stemming out of his concern for First Aaid, imo)

Ambulon let the Genericons share a cell

To sum it up: Ambulon is very greatly concerned for the greater good and treating people without bias, Decepticon or Autobot, especially when there's any sort of discrimination involved.

(Using Genericons and Triple M as a tool with Ambulon was a very clever foreshadowing for Ambulon's situation, but it is a general theme that runs in these issues and Ratchet's/medics character arcs, it's the functionism, one's shape and purpose in life, but it is a completely different post to make. Just let's keep the theme of one's shape and purpose in mind.)

The thing is, Ambulon is who he is by choice. His Decepticon past is always showing, whether he wants it or not, but all he wants, essentially, is to help people and treat them with kindness. He's a "gearstick", but he's a gearstick with a big spark. He saw the greater cruelty in Decepticons and made a choice to never participate in it.

Ambulon is an MTO who made his life and became what he wants to be despite everything: Decepticons, his alt-mode, biases, all of that. He's true to himself and his intentions.

I'm gonna also get this out of the way that Ambulon's established character is continuously ignored, dumbed down and twisted: the point is that I do believe JRO didn't think about him that much or that deep, and what he did with him did not retain with him into further issues. That is to say, "You're gonna let Dr DJD cut us in half?" is a dumb fucking line to come out of Ambulon specifically, makes no sense, too snarky and cruel all things considered, and while I think it's also very funny it jsut shows Ambulon's accidental insignificance. Ok. That's all.

Pharma

Oh boy this one's a doozy. Okay, listen, I'll try to get more brief with it, try to get straight to the point, but Pharma has so much nuance around him on a greater scheme of things that it might also just be it's own post. SO we'll just try to focus on his persona and relations to others.

Pharma is a doctor of talent on par with Ratchet, if not actually better. He used to be friends with him, he's implied to have used to do medical service in the new institute, and eventually was stationed on Delphi by Prowl, practically abandoned by Ratchet. There, he ends up being blackmailed by Tarn, ending up killing his patients to meet the increasing quota, being led to the brink of creating a virus that he exposes the facility to in hope to close it down and escape it scot-free. Obviously, because of Ratchet, it didn't work, the rest is history.

Unlike Ambulon with his 3 panels and a half of screentime worth talking about character-wise, Pharma is a combination of multiple things at once, his place as an Autobot, his connection to the DJD, his act, and most of his actual character we get from very few shots of him from the past and what people say of him, and just a little of his behavior at Delphi before his crime is revealed.

So I think we'll focus specifically on the Decepticon part when it comes to Pharma cuz it's much easier to talk about.

Pharma vehemently, without hiding it, hates Decepticons.

It will go into even bigger field of speculations than trying to piece Ambulon's character together for why he hates them so much. It could both just be a thrown in line for the story to flow (Genericons) and act as a foreshadowing (DJD blackmail), the fact of the matter is, he hates Decepticons, he does not have pity for Decepticons, and if DJD did not play into his hatred, years of war for sure did.

(Also worth mentioning that in the issue #4, the paralleling story is Tailgate learning about the war and backing off on his decision to be a Decepticon. The entire build up works very well, imo, and plays into just how much it should hit you when Pharma turns out providing for DJD, along with the choice of Ambulon to not be a Decepticon anymore.)

You see, I think Pharma is incredibly caring person. He cares for his patients and he cares for his people. He takes his work extremely seriously. He's willing to be a donor for his patient and he's still conducting research to cure illnesses when there was no legitimate point for him to do that anymore. He's not just a surgeon, but he's a virologist/epidemiologist.

But, probably when we ask ourselves, "So if he was such a wonderful doctor, equal to Ratchet, someone Ratchet recognizes, why wasn't he the Chief Medical Officer in the first place?"

I think it's mostly his personality. It's his hubris and ego. It's also the inherent societal bias of Cybertron when it comes to jets - though this part of worldbuilding isn't that consistent, he is a forged jet AND a doctor.

And that's also why I think he doesn't believe in that "forged" functionism bullshit. BUT thats another post of its own (take a shot every time i say that in this post).

Let's just bullet point this:

Pharma is a talented doctor who's good and dedicated to his job. Practically nothing is impossible for him and it becomes a focal point of his conflict with Ratchet, too.

That said, Pharma's shape is what, I think, is responsible for his hubris. He's a jet, he's forged, he's a doctor, but he's a doctor because HE, PHARMA, is good. Nothing to do with some God. (which is different from Ratchet's internalized functionism)

Pharma hates Decepticons, he tried to kill the DJD, and it may seem like he pushed it all on Ambulon because he was a Decepticon, but I don't think that's the case. Specifically because of this:

He does not see Ambulon as a Decepticon, and it was just panicked shitty lie he had to quickly come up with on the spot.

Pharma feels guilt for his actions, and after killing Ambulon, he's actively taunting First Aid to kill him.

Pharma is a jet doctor trapped in the loop of self-sabotage after being exploited, psychologically tortured and left for dead, after a poor attempt of saving face. Pharma is a jet doctor who embraced his new look, but couldn't live with it, far from accepting it. Furthermore, his body is used by Adaptus himself, where the only thing he could do is trying to get his body back, to help his comrades, only to end up dying, again.

That's where I'm going to use a single word of God that makes, all in all, a lot of sense.

"Grurdging respect" is about best way to describe Pharma and Ambulon.

Now since I've reached the image limit on this post it's relentless rambling and speculations time!

You probably can already tell where I'm going with this. I think Pharma and Ambulon direct inversions of each other.

Decepticon gone Autobot as a choice - Autobot gone rogue out of blackmail and fear of failure

MTO doing what he wants to do and taking control of his body and life, disconnected from a gestalt or his "purpose" - A forged jet trying to continue his career of a doctor despite all the odds but who's agency is continuously taken, not only by others but by his own ego

Where they overlap, is their desire to do what they want. Where they differ, is one's sincerity and other's toxicity.

Ambulon is someone Pharma would never be, and someone he, on meta level, wishes he was more like. He doesn't want to be Ratchet, even if we think a little about his obsession and desire to prove to Ratchet that he's better, he wants to be someone Ratchet would respect. And in the end of the day, it all didn't matter anymore, because clearly Ratchet never respected him enough in the first place: "waging a war on his body", taking body parts for his own gain (hands), that Pharma didn't even really care about anymore. It was personal. He wanted Ratchet to hurt.

All of this, ultimately, is justified. Little who would respond to knowing someone who betrayed you (and whom you, also, betrayed) also breached boundaries of your autonomy. It's just basic decency. I don't believe TFs never heard of that or don't follow it, in some fashion. Maybe it's more loose, but for the purpose of drama and villification of Pharma, it was convenient, I guess.

See, Pharma is just inherently, like anyone, very flawed. The circumstance he's put in and the war led to the worst of his qualities spike. And in relation to Ambulon, it's the inverse of a person who, having seen the horrors of the war, having been through the horror and the existential dread of being in a gestalt, chose kindness anyway.

"Grudging respect". A jet doctor, a genius, and an ex-soldier MTO, who made the choice of helping people. An ex-Decepticon, too, no less.

See how it could've developed into something more?

Both eager to do their job, Ambulon is a perfect stabilizer for Pharma's general emotional response to things. He may be a good doctor, but he's prone to acting and saying things before really thinking about it. Ambulon is capable of convincing him and giving a good argument, without it being personal.

"Grudging respect" with Ambulon working with one of the best doctors out there, who's work is going to be invaluable even after his death.

And if things worked out differently? Do you think Ambulon wouldn't be there to sympathize with Pharma's trauma regarding DJD? Do you think Ambulon wouldn't pity Pharma for what Tarn put him through? Ambulon? The Decepticon who was there? The one who even should fear DJD the most? The one who might've even triggered DJD once he was so close on the radar?

He might've confided in Pharma in the first place, as someone literally second in charge after him.

Pharma and Ambulon are defying Adaptus as a societal concept, among with the existential idea of your shape dictating your purpose. And within the text they don't just defy, they end up suffering the most out of it - Pharma ends up in a position where his hands are praised more than he, as a person, is, Ambulon dies by these hands, and his death dooms Pharma as well.

I hope it was comprehensive enough, i WISH i could include more images to prove my point. The amica endura would've been insane. If only the circumstance was different.

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gunsatthaphan · 2 years ago

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"you're addicted to me."

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da3drat · 21 days ago

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remember this one😶❓(wip)

#long ramble tags yey #I'm planning for extremely ornate bonemold for the material of her armor possibly w glass or ebony details but we'll see if I change my min #something I think about a lot while drawing her is dressing her in materials that are culturally and physically native to morrowind-#which is why almost all the accessories I give her are glass #also something I'm trying with my art lately is juggling multiple wips instead of hyperfixating on full pieces for like 6 hours lol #its nice because I can jump in with whatever part of the process sounds fun at the moment for like an hour and then go back to hw #downside being when I leave a piece alone for that long and come back I IMMEDIATELY find problems #and its hard not to dismantle the whole piece trying to fix them...#hoh well #wip #my art #ayem #iii #morrowind #almalexia

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imexperiencinggrowthgetoverit · 1 year ago

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Amity Park: US MOST HAUNTED!

Amity Park: The Faceblind City!

except the westons

#like #if Danny didnt want his parents knowing then he’d just have to keep silent around them and hope they dont notice his body shape and language #which- in this specific idea I had -I think they would actually notice over time #I miss me some Accepting Parents TM #also this idea started from a wild ass dream I almost fell into #where Ellie is being cared for by a homeless children’s shelter and won’t release her to Phantom because clearly that isn’t his daughter #they look nothing alike! but then Bruce Wayne is in town and is like I’m Sorry Maam Whats the Problem? cuz he overheard #and was baffled when she confirmed taht she said that #like he’s seeing a child who looks identical to this man with exception of minor features and the costume her dad’s wearing #he is SO confused #which does lead to Red Robin on a rooftop somewhere like #what the hyuck. the entire city- except for this poor guy -is faceblind!#is that genetic? and then he becomes hyperfixated so Oracle has to take over the actual operating part of their investigation as RR is gone #dpxdc #dcxdp #didnt intend to tag this as that actually but like ill just make a separate post for the non-crossover one #also 100% allowed to screenshot-reblog and transcribe my tags cuz I’m too tired and too far in

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corpsentry · 11 months ago

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black eyes

#my stuff #my writing #mein fucking goat i cannot keep having dreams about my ex and yet it is happening still #this is one of the less remarkable ones even. i’ve had two in the past month where i try desperately to give them a flatscreen tv #and one of those big ones too. like 40 inches across. i don’t own a flatscreen tv #i’ll admit it being in singapore is hitting me like a brick to the balls and i am grievously unwell #it’s like i come back and all the work i put in to deal with my anxiety and depression gets high in the woods and dies #but that’s not the point. the point is devoid of friends (in fucking america) and a hyperfixation (haven’t found anything that’s stuck)#i am full of nothing but yearning. good ol classic yearning. and i am so moved on from my ex but i keep trying to give them this fucking tv #!!!! ?????? huh????????????? mayne got………#a girlfriend or a cat would fix me. or leaving this country take your pick #working on it #i’ve made a to do list to combat my i have lost the will to do things problem #and on it is APPLY TO JOBS (note; outside singapore (note: outside america too))#i have a plan and it’s to get as far away as possible and live #we’re getting there #in the meantime here’s a funny poem #i was so. in the dream i actually wanted to see them which is crazy. top 10 bad fan characterizations #but it was a dream with a good color palette. all cool whites and grays and a deep deep blue for the night #cold cold white snow. etc. so of course i had to write about it #which i have done. and now i am going to sleep #good bye

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static-scribblez · 5 months ago

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i hate hyperfixating on real people

#this is abt vater boris #look i know you can't control what or who you hyperfixate on #but i still can't help but feel creepy for having a hyperfixation on an actual person #i've made a playlist on spotify that's literally just a bunch of different episodes from podcasts they were featured / interviewed in #in one of those episodes the hosts asked vater why they go by 'vater boris' and 'ben scardo' interchangeably #and they said it was because of a stalker issue they experienced while on tour with will wood and the tapeworms #which prompted will to make them come up with a stage name since he didn't want their real name to be out there #in case it ever happened again #even though i knew that all i was doing was listening to their music and podcasts they've been on #and watching instagram playlists of videos they took of their pets #i still couldn't help but feel like i was part of the problem #i'm not doing anything that would be considered stalkerish but theres still that voice in my head calling me one #is this relatable to anybody or am i just being weird

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scarapanna · 10 months ago

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Was browsing trough old asks for fun, and realized a few things:

I've changed tons of old concepts for IO behind the scenes (main story un-related/that I haven't ""revealed"" trough my video projects yet)

One anon predicted me getting reading glasses

I should re-vamp my colorful horse designs/silly

#beetle's ramblings #I'm in that hyperfix phase where I make content/talk about one thing only (spoiler: it's intertwined opposites/silly)#i'm sooo normal #being frfr this hyperfix is so weird hsbfsbfb #I start fearing my loss in interest while finishing WIPs bit by bit and then once I finish them (animatics n stuff) my interest SPARKS #it's a bit of a problem since it's obscuring my other ideas buuut I'll survive #lost interest with a few old ones for this thing #I'm brainrotting HARD frfrr #less on asks and more on animatics but still--#the fix is real

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yellowloid · 1 year ago

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only way i'm accepting the apology video that's no doubt going to come from watcher in the next few days is if ryan and shane decide to throw steven out altogether

#this is a joke but it also isn't #i do believe the paywall was mainly his idea as a ceo + he was most definitely behind the decision to hire andrew and that other guy #if you're already having budget problems you don't just go around hiring new people just bc they were your buzzfeed buddies #and you want to go to fancy restaurants eating gold-covered truffle with them #that being said i'm not babyfying ryan and shane either bc even if it was his idea (big if there) they still agreed to it and >#that's just so yikes. i'm so disappointed in them #i've been watching them from the beginning. i've loved them from the buzzfeed days in 2015 and then from the very first episode of unsolved #(i even wrote fics of them they were That Big of a hyperfixation)#i've followed them from day one when they moved to watcher too #as time passed i distanced myself from their content a bit just bc 1) it became a bit too professional and lost that genuine cozy feeling :#and 2) they started pushing steven into most of the content and i always ALWAYS got such a bad vibe from him i literally couldn't watch any #> content he was in. i thought people liked him so i was convinced it was a me problem but now i see people agreeing #and i can finally live my truth. don't be shy throw him out #they'd still have to regain the trust of their fanbase after such a slap in the face but at least part of the trash would be taken out #watcher #ramblings

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carwoodron · 9 months ago

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fic ramblings ignore me

#you guys remember all's fire. how i spent 2 months talking about nothing but that fic and how it was my baby and i loved it #yeah so that was actually the first fic i wrote that 160k monstrosity. so naturally i dont like it now but im still fond of it #listen the writing is.... questionable at times and there's purple prose enough to drown a man and there's just so many unnecessary scenes #bc i would throw in any scene i thought of that i found cute or Meaningful frankly JSJSJSJS #but yeah my problem being. i make it private then public every now and again cause i cant personally bear to look at it but damn #i wrote that in 2 months. blood sweat and tears. just leave it out there kai!!#bc i was just reading a fic that had a scene set in the jacques in boston and just went 😭😭😭😭😭 that was their home!!!!#so anyway. its public again LMFAO #maybe if the hyperfixation hits hard enough i can edit the other 70k fic sitting in my drafts about them meeting before the war #which i ALREADY REWROTE ONCE.#somebody help this woman shes unwell

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forgechildofheph · 11 months ago

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My therapist hates me for this lol

"How do you read so many books??" I am simply trying to avoid reality, what are you doing

#jk #Am i?#My therapist knows the hold my hyperfixations has on me #PJO characters will forever be my comfort characters #Will legit ask them in my head unironically and they'll answer back #I ask Leo how to solve my circuit problems or what I've missed in codes when he's DYSLEXIC #I watch the rain #Sally Jackson in the show-style #Camping chair out in the rain while I read on my kindle #never got sick idky #Life just feels so GREY compared to how the fictional world feels #its a problem #Its like a piece of me broke off when I read the books when I was a kid and stayed with them #never to return to me again and I'm just halfway to being a shell of who i used to be #wow dramatic #haha

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swallowtail-ageha · 1 year ago

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Aside from v_ni being a proto terf and just unpleasant person in general who is willing to call other people SLURS over liking a fictional character and made publicly fun out of tbj and peoe who had weird ships her excuse for her shitty behavior was "but i am afraid to lose my friends 🥺🥺" my sibling in christ you are 17 why are you so desperatedly fishing approval from 14 year olds

#also apparently she said she was younger to date a 12/13 yo??? yikes #i like. remember checking her bird app account mostly bcs i am paranoid on how people can act differently in social media #and aside from being right i also saw that she referred to me as 'the person i am hyperfixated on'#and i am like hello??? i am not a fictional character i am not a video game i am a person???#i myself am not a saint nor the most pleasant person ever but. come on. why is it that i always manage to find ppl worse than me #like. i have major problems with idealizing/demonizing people around me and sometimes my feelings towards them #can dramatically switch on a whim or like. depending on the day #but i've never referred to anyone as 'the person i am hyperfixated on' like hello???

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ohnoitstbskyen · 2 months ago

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Ok so I’ve had this question for a while and I feel like you’ll be able to give me a good answer. I understand that we’re absolutely not supposed to support anything JKR does monetarily and I never intend to do so. However is engaging with Harry Potter media *at all* also something I should not do or is it only things that give her money?

Like, would there be anything wrong with me playing Hogwarts Legacy if I pirated it? Is fanfiction and fan art ok to consume? Or is engaging with the IP at all going to be harmful in a way that I don’t see atm?

Thank you for your time!

I don't really think a cis person is the right person to ask about this, but I also know that trans people are sick to death of having to field these questions so I'll do my best to answer this, if everyone who reads my answer will promise me that you will NOT use anything I say in this post as an annoying argument against a trans person who has a different opinion on the matter. Remember whose opinions are actually important here.

And look, number one, you can do whatever the fuck you want. Nobody can stop you. If you, in yourself, in your soul, feel morally comfortable consuming Harry Potter by some convoluted method of Ethical Consumption™, then go and do that, and own it, and have the strength to be judged for your decisions.

Trans people might not trust you - hell, I'll probably not trust you either. They might get angry at you, and criticize you, or roll their eyes and call you a fucking loser. If you have the moral conviction that what you are doing is right, and that you are acting in accordance with your beliefs and you are not doing harm, then stand by that conviction and face the consequences. Have that strength of character.

But if you feel the need to go around posting and arguing that it's unfair, that you shouldn't be judged, that you should get to be a special exception and people are unreasonable when they get mad at you... then that is evidence, proof positive, that you are a fucking loser. That you are cowardly, and you don't actually believe that what you are doing is right, you just want the world to affirm your fragile ego while you enjoy your little treats.

To be clear, I am not accusing you of doing this (you seem to just earnestly be asking for guidance), but there's a hell of a lot of people who do do this, and you don't want to be one of them.

So that's number one. Do whatever the fuck you want, and face the consequences with a spine.

Number two is... just fucking drop it. That is my earnest advice to you. Just fucking drop Harry Potter. They are children's books from the early 2000s, they just are not that fucking good or important. The Hogwarts Legacy game is live service slop; the movies are passable at best and their quality comes from the actors being better than the source material. Just drop it. Harry Potter has nothing to offer that you can't get elsewhere from better media with better authors, or problematic authors who have good grace to at least be dead.

Don't waste your life thinking about complicated ways to circumvent the moral problem of JK Rowling's rancid transphobic hate-aura at the center of the franchise, don't waste your finite time on Earth trying to thread that stupid needle. Harry Potter isn't worth this. Rowling is old, and shriveling from hate and mold fumes, at the very least just wait for her to fucking die, and for her political project to fail, before you pick that world back up again.

I speak as someone who read the first book at age 11, hyperfixated on relating to Harry, and whose entire cultural life was consumed by the franchise for over a decade. It is not worth it. You don't need it, you don't need the stress of trying to navigate how or whether to engage with it ethically. You almost certainly have an enormous backlog of other books, games, movies and TV shows you've been meaning to get around to, so just go do that instead. I promise you it will be infinitely more rewarding, and infinitely less compromised by stress and guilt and cognitive dissonance.

And while you're at it, send some money to a trans charity and go scream invectives at a transphobic politician some time.

#tb answers #whumpcollector #harry potter #hogwarts legacy

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angelltheninth · 5 months ago

Text

Friends with Benefits with Love and Deepspace Men

Pairing: Zayne, Rafayel, Xavier, Sylus, Caleb x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smut, creampie, friends with benefits, protectiveness, love confession, fingering, realization of feelings, denaial of feelings, mating press, desk sex, jealusy, flirting, referanced cunnilingus

Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters | Commissions

A/N: I would legit want to be their friends. The benefit is heaing me yap about how pretty they all are and whatever my newest hyperfixation is.

FwB!Zayne always tries to keep things strictly professional between the two of you. There's him when he is your friend and colleague and him when he's making love to you on the surface of his desk. It's easy for him to cross between the lines, one moment he's giving you advice or talking about problem he has and the next he has his hand down your underwear and the other over your mouth, keeping you quiet. He's actually very good at going between the two modes and will never cross a line without your permission. Any feelings he might develop he will only show when he's being your lover, not when he's your friend.

FwB!Rafayel hides behind the flirting he does to make you believe he's not as serious as he is. There will always be a time for him to be your friend and listen to any problems you make have, go on movie dates with you, take you shopping and order your favorite food when you're sad. And then there is the time when he offers to take your mind off whatever is bothering you by holding you close while you ride his cock and breathe heavily against his neck. Occasionally you have said you loved each other, and both of you know it's true, but you want to take a bit more before your relationship takes that next step.

FwB!Xavier gets too into his own head about the whole deal because how is supposed to act that he wasn't balls deep in you the night before when you walk funny in front of him. Downright impossible for him to ignore the signs you give him. And he really does try his best but he doesn't want to make it seem like he only wants you for sex so he ends up texting you a lot while you're apart. Which only confuses things more. Truly he wishes there was an easy way for him to deal with this. Perhaps the best thing is for him to confess that he wants to be your boyfriend, not just the guy who makes you come and then never talks about it again until the next time.

FwB!Sylus teases you so much that you have no idea when he wants to be your friend and when he wants to fuck. There have been times where he deliberately made you think one thing only to do the other. Mindgames like these are fun for him, and watching you get all out of sorts because of it is even better. For as many times as he's fucked you into the bed he was also the one to comfort you when you were full of doubts and wanted nothing in return. Part of him hates that you still see him as a friend after all of that but he also won't force you to see him as anything else. Besides it's only a matter of time before you do.

FwB!Caleb is too jealous to stay just friends after the very first night you spend together. Stares at other guys that flirt with you so much a few of them actually took off running in the opposite direction. He didn't spend the whole night eating you out until you could no longer scream his name just for some other guy to swoop in and take you home. Try as he might to hide his jealous side it's very much impossible, his smile gets sour and tight every time you tell him a guy flirted with you. A man like him can only tolerate so much before he confesses to you while fucking you. Not even romantically, he growls it out while having you folded in half and just as he fills you up with cum.

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