#the racism that biracial couples face

[slutforsnow]

Skin Don't Matter To Me

Quick a/n before the fic gets started; I am SO SO SORRY to those who were upset/uncomfortable/angry that I made the original billy x black!reader a former slave!reader. I didn't think. I shouldn't have been up at 1am writing. It was horrid and a terrible decision on my end. Forgive me or not, is entirely up to you. Ty to the anons who called me out for it and made me realize it was wrong to do that, biracial or not. I hope you can forgive me 🫂

Tw/CW: insecurities, anxiety, racism is brought up (not comments, just behavior).

Summary: Reader gets insecure about her relationship with Billy after seeing some girls flirt with him.

It was a chill Saturday evening in the saloon as patrons drank, played poker, and chatted absent-mindly. It was an easy night, for sure, aside from a few drunken snide comments made towards reader, but she shrugged them off. After all, she wasn't getting paid to fight the customers.

As she hummed and wiped down the bar, which was currently empty, she stopped midway to wipe some sweat off her face—reader loves her afro, and has no problems pulling it back so she didn't sweat to death while she worked, but some nights it was just too hot and having so many people out and about the saloon was making it harder to deal with.

Her dark skin shone in sweat as she worked but didn't complain. She had to make a livin' somehow, and she wasn't gonna do that by moanin' and groanin'.

As she resumed her work, she flashed a smile towards her boyfriend as he played poker. He was in his favorite seat, watching her work as he placed his bets and ignored the other girls hitting on him and trying to get his attention. He was technically working as well—he and his boys were security for the saloon because some of the customers were still quite horrid to the folks of color who worked, especially the women. They'd try to threaten y/n but were often silenced or kicked out by Billy and his men.

Y/n and Billy had been dating for 2 years, despite the ups and downs of him being a cowboy and the racism she'd face for being a black woman.

As she worked, still humming, she caught sight of some white girls being all touchy and whispering things in his ear. She bit her tongue as to not cause a scene and focused on continuing to grab glasses and wipe down tables.

'He'd never leave me. He's said that,' She thought to herself as a reminder that Billy would never leave her for some white girl. She was his, and he was hers. Yet, despite the constant love and affection he would give her, she still got that nagging fear that he would leave her.

A few hours later, Y/n's shift had ended and the couple were headed back home to the ranch that they bought with their savings over the course of their relationship. Y/n was silent the whole way home, which made Billy worry that he did something wrong.

"Darlin' did I do somethin' wrong?" He asked, setting his hat on a hook by the door as he shut the door behind him.

A lump formed in her throat and she sighed, knowing he'd keep asking if she said nothing.

"It wasn't you, Billy it... it's just my fears," She answered, trying to dismiss her fears.

"Well, what's wrong? It won't go away unless you talk to me."

Damn his smooth and relaxing tone- she didn't want to talk about it, afraid it would turn into an argument about his loyalties but he was so understanding that she knew she she couldn't hide it from him.

"Those... those damn whores that keep touchin' on you like you're not taken," She told him, sighing. "I know it's probably stupid or somethin-"

"Oh thank the Lord, I was hoping you'd bring this up," He breathed out, letting out a relaxed laugh and earning a perplexed look from y/n.

"...What?"

"I've been wanting to tell you about that. I never wanted to stress you out, but I hate, and I mean absolutely fuckin' hate when they do that. It gets so annoyin', I tell them I'm taken and to back off, but do they listen? No." As Billy continued to ramble about how he hated the other women touching and talking to him like he wasn't a taken man, she smiled.

He was so vocal about how much he hated it when they touched and flirted with him that it eased her worried soul and she hugged him tightly.

Fucking hell, she loves this man so much.

[zalrb]

i, for one, think it’s hilarious that the writer of challengers genuinely thought he was meaningfully representing black women in tennis when serena williams herself has been very outspoken about her struggles in the industry that directly correlate with her physicality being the opposite of how the sport wanted to be seen. to then cast a conventionally attractive model thin light skin biracial actress to portray those struggles is. a Choice, i guess.

Well this is what I'm talking about! I was SO irritated by that comment because he missed his own point and on top of that, Tashi is underwritten and we don't even see the barriers she would have faced as a biracial tennis player, they just mention racism a couple of times.

[royal-confessions]

“I don’t think for a second it was Kate who came up with “recollections may vary” in response to Meghan calling out the racism she faced. Brazenly dismissing your biracial SiL’s experiences with bigotry is dumb as hell, and that’s not how WC operate. One thing you must admire about the couple is that they know how to play the game better than anyone, they would never say something that can be so easily used against them in the future.” - Submitted by Anonymous

[sarahnasoni]

Roundtable Presentation: Red, White & Royal Blue

Red, White and Royal Blue (2023), is directed by Matthew Lopez and is placed in the romantic-comedy genre. The movie is based on the novel that was published in 2019 by Casey McQuiston.

The narrative of this film centers around Alex Claremont-Diaz, the First Son of the U.S. President, and his antagonistic dynamic with England's young prince, Henry. Following a disruptive incident at the prince's brother's wedding, they must fake a close friendship to prevent a potential national scandal. What begins as a forced camaraderie gradually evolves into a deeper connection, complicated by the need to conceal their relationship amidst the spotlight of Alex's mother's re-election campaign as the first female President.

In the film the Alex Claremont-Diaz transcends otherness by not letting his defining characteristic be his racial and ethnic background and instead focusing more on his sexuality. This being said Alex's mom is the first black woman president and talks about the criticism she faces both because of her race and gender. By having this film center on a biracial gay couple it makes it a lot more approachable than most movies in this genre as it reaches a wider audience with its diversity. The film examines situations that aren't typical of romcoms by having two queer main characters. Also having a main guy character be bisexual is also not expected as there is not much media in general on bisexual men. Most romcoms are about heterosexual white couples and there are very few romcoms that focus on two men or have men as the main character. The fact the film centers around a gay biracial couple itself subverts gender roles that are normally typical in romcoms.

I think there is some unrealistic aspects of this film, including the fact that Henry seems to receive and face more backlash than Alex. The film managed to make Henry, the white guy the victim which is unfortunate and they could have portrayed the intersectionality of racism and homophobia better. I think they could have also mentioned more about race and ethnicity as although at some points it was briefly mentioned it was never really delved into.

[onnattiming]

Blog #1 - Atlanta (2016-2023)

“Atlanta” is a TV show created by multifaceted artist Donald Glover. It follows the journey of a college dropout who starts managing his cousin; an upcoming rapper who goes by “Paper Boi”. As their journey unfolds, the group navigates through social and economic obstacles relating to racism, poverty, and class in a drama storyline with hints of deadpan comedy. The show serves as a commentary on these issues, while creating humor in surreal moments and “what-if” scenarios that offer perspective. A couple episodes with these scenarios include if Justin Bieber was black, a black man who identifies as a “trans-racial white man”, and a biracial student trying to prove his “blackness” through stereotypes for a full scholarship. Virtually everything the characters go through seems like a joke on the surface, but you are being shown a deeper perspective on how societal factors of race and class serve as obstacles to some and advantages to others. The video link below provides a comical scene where Paper Boi is being berated by illogical accusations and stereotypes because of his "background".

Atlanta’s third season introduces a completely new atmosphere by introducing four stand-alone episodes with one-off characters facing similar themes. When first reading “On The Matter of Whiteness” by Richard Dyer, I was immediately reminded about this season and how they tackled the topic of whiteness. The episode “three slaps” starts off following a white man and black man fishing on an eerie lake at night. They start talking about the creepy atmosphere and the white man explains why; the lake used to be a self-governed black town that was later flooded by the state government and that their souls are haunting the lake (this implies to the story behind Lake Lanier). He then murmurs that they were “almost white”. The black man questions him on what he meant by that, where he replies with “white isn’t a real thing, some people just become white” and that "white" is a social concept with no scientific basis. He brings up how the Chattahoochee river was dammed and the people living there refused to leave because they thought they were safe and “paid to be white”, leaving the other man speechless. He ends off by saying “White is when you are, where you are. With enough blood or money anyone can be white. The thing about being white is, it blinds you. It's easy to see the black man as cursed because you’ve separated yourself from him, but you don’t know you’re enslaved just like him”. The ideas reflect very closely to Dyer’s writings of how whiteness functions as a position of privilege and power,  how “white” has been shaped as a social construct, and the “blindness” that comes with being white. 

*clips from Season 3 that tackle the topic of whiteness

The fourth episode of the season titled “The Big Payback'' follows a scenario where many black people start suing certain white people who had ancestry linked to slave owners who enslaved their forebears. We see this happen to Marshall, a white man being a victim of this epidemic by getting sued by a black woman he doesn’t know. As a result, he loses his family and home and ends up staying at a hotel. He stumbles across another white man named “E”, the same man from the previous episode, who is in the same situation. Marshall starts venting to him about what he lost, how he “didn’t do anything” and that they “don’t deserve this”, and E challenges him by asking “what do THEY (black people) deserve?”. Before Marshall can respond, E tells him “slavery is not past, it is a cruel, unavoidable ghost that haunts them in ways we can’t see”. He brings up Marshall’s situation where his daughter will have to grow up without a father and make a name for herself from the ground up, just like they (white people) did to them (black people). As Marshall comes to terms with his future, E reassures him by saying everything will be okay because “the curse they were running from has been lifted” and that they’re free. The episode ends with Marshall working in a fancy restaurant where part of his salary goes towards the woman suing him. As he serves a table, it’s revealed that the waiting staff is dominantly white with the diners being exclusively people of color. This episode relates to concepts covered by Peggy McIntosh’s “White Privilege, Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack” which sets out to paint the invisible privileges white people benefit from without realizing it. The plot of this episode made some of those privileges aware to Marshall, one of them being that he doesn’t have to carry the trauma black people carry related to slavery and treatment of their people. Even though he didn’t “do anything” to that woman, he doesn’t see or feel the pain that she carries. This episode brings up a hypothetical scenario with results that would change the definition of class and make white people consider the “blessing" and "curse” of whiteness.

*ending of S3E4, showing a full white staff serving primarily people of color in a fancy restaurant

[cottoncandyruby]

I was gonna do more lil updates for MythiCon but the journey here has been so tumultuous all I’ve wanted to do is sleep and scream 😂

I forgot how to do read more on tumblr so just scroll by if ya don’t wanna read aha

"Anticaption, Aviation & Allergies"

Part 1. A little trip to Dublin

Of course the shortest part of my trip would be the easiest. So my mum and I were up at 3 am got a very expensive taxi, cos there were no trains, to the closest airport. Lingered there until our flight left at 8. I was so excited even though I’ve been on a plane before when I was small, I had no sensory memory of it or anything so the sensation of flying was like woo.

Tis a very short flight to Dublin, like an hour and I had a window seat so the absolute dream 😍. (Also that's like the only picture I took because I forget to take pictures)

Part 2. Dublin to New York

So we had to chill in the airport for 4 ish hours, we shared some BK chips cos airport food is overpriced lol. Anyways, it all chill until we get called to the lil reception people by the gate and they wanna look at our info and we don't know why or what the issue is. We booked this trip through booking.com but it is unclear what info actually went through lmao. They change something on our tickets and we get moved seats (?) And then it's all fine.

We end up talking to this Irish lady who travels for work and tell her about our super fun New York layover; it's 14 hours, we were very excited that we could go explore New York in the later afternoon/evening cos the only thing we anticipated doing was attending MythiCon. The lady's like "Oh....14 hours" with an obvious, "honey something went wrong" face.

Part 3. The New York Flight

We get on the plane to New York and we are on the exit row where you have to verbally confirm that in an emergency you will be able to open the door and help people get out, no pressure right?! I am on the aisle seat, my mum the middle and our new friend Steven(?) is in the window seat.

This flight lasts 7 hours and I spend the entire time reading the first LotR book cos I can't hear Steven for shit, airplanes are loud y'all, and avoiding eyecontact with bathroom users who are queuing up in front of us cos the loo is directly opposite. I made the mistake of wearing, what i used to call, my comfy jeans and I'm a big girl with some thicc thighs and oof ma legs had no circulation.

Steven talks my mums ear off for near 6 of the 7 hours in which she sparingly looks at me for ways out of the conversation or for me to join in, and I genuinely cannot hear him but also the whole ordeal is hilarious to watch. Except Steven thought we were a couple and I am realising I will have to spend the whole of MythiCon reinstating that I am travelling with my mum not my partner. Gosh.

Part 4. Newark, not New York

We arrive and Frodo, Sam, Pippin and Merry have just left Tom Bombadil and we realise we are not getting out of this airport. We retrieve our bags, my suitcase is slightly broken and won't stand up properly but we move. A very nice woman informs us we won't be able to store our luggage anywhere and that our flight which leaves at 6 am, we arrive at 4pm in New York by the way, won't be open for check-in until 3.30 am.

So, we must keep our luggage with us at all times and journeying into New York is suddenly much less appealing. I am also internally reeling from the disappointment of not going up the Empire State Building which was something I thought my mum had booked but no. Anyways, I don't wanna walk around New York with my suitcase but the other big issue besides the prospect of sleeping in the airport is Mielle Rosemary and Mint Hair Oil.

Here be some context before I continue:

I am biracial. My mama's white and I have no connection to my relatives of colour wherever they may be. So, despite being black I have lived a very white experience (still had the racism and all the shit but anyways) for y'all readers of colour or informed folx, you will know afro hair requires different products and care to white hair. I have slowly become aware of this over the last 5 or so years. I have never had a protective style and the town over from me is more diverse than where I live and has afro hair salons. So, I boldly book in for Goddess Locs cos I'm Jamaican and they look pretty and why not spice things up before going on a 33 hour flight?

Unlike as specified in the booking information for this hair it is not 30 minutes but 8 hours and not 55 quid but 85 and its this very rude 19 year old doing my hair. She puts some spray on and recommends I put hair oil on to keep my scalp hydrated. This is the Sunday before we leave. We get the flight to Dublin on the following Wednesday morning.

On Monday, I purchase the aforementioned hair oil. My hair feels a little itchy and I cannot tell if it is mild discomfort because of the weight of the locs or the spray she's used. So on the Tuesday night my mum liberally applies the hair oil across my entire scalp, a lil bit runs down my back across my face etc.

I wake up Wednesday morning, it still itchy.

....

We do the Dublin flight, the New York flight and when we land in Newark I am starting to feel very sick and my head feels warm to the touch. It could be from lack of sleep but fainting is imminent so we take the AirTrain to Penn Station and purchase some antihistamines. We see a sign for Madison Square Garden and head back to the airport.

We awkwardly finagle ourselves into a bathroom stall with our suitcases and my mum gets some nail scissors out from her suitcase and cuts my 85 pound hair off of my head. My scalp and more clearly my hairline is covered in bumps. I dont have phobias well except arachnophobia but hives and bumps make me feel sick. So I could not touch my head and boy I wanna scream and cry, I know that I must look as awful as I feel.

We remain in the airport til our flight, I get no sleep, my mum dozes off awkwardly on the chairs and my head gradually stops hurting but is still hot and itchy. The nausea abates over time.

Part 5. New York to Austin

Flight is smooth, my mum sleeps the whole way and I listen to music and half watch ParaNorman with no sound on cos I'm a multitasker.

Our flight is early, and we had booked a driver (which felt so posh) and Austin airport is lovely looking I must say. Anyways, our flight is an hour early so we sit in the pick up bit for am hour gettin chilly. Our driver arrives when he was scheduled to around 10.30 and says he'd been waiting for ages because he saw the flight was updated. Immediately felt guilty aha but he was nice. My mum woke up with a headache so I'm doin most of the talking.

The drive to the hotel is exciting, we passed by so many beautiful houses. Its so much more colourful than I thought, not that I had a whole bucket of ideas about Texas' aesthetic.

The hotel is tall, brown ish and angular. Inside its kind of intimidating but to the right of the entrance my eye catches this big sign for MythiCon and they've got a little reception area fashioned with all the merch Mythical Beasts get when they arrive which I'll post pictures of separately but it's lovely looking. The posters are huge and I fear they will be crumpled on the way back but c'est la vie.

We go to reception after being armed with Mythical Merch and they have shuttle buses runnin' to and from Stat Hill Ranch so my mum and I make a mental note to catch the earliest one which is at 2.30pm today ahhhh.

Anyways reception. Everything's going fine, despite my email the dude respects my chosen name which is very satisfying after being called ma'am several times awoke the gender angst in me. He asks for a small deposit of 225 bucks.

Side note - My mum and I are bad with money. We know she'll have got paid Friday morning for work and that that will cover Mythicon expenses. By the time we get to the hotel, we only have 100 dollars.

My mum calls my nan, I message my best friend, who graciously send us the money and 30 minutes later we are through. Check in was advertised at 4pm (it's around 11 ish when we arrive) but one moment of good luck allows us a room early. He might've just pitied us I don't know. I hate money, I hate capitalism. I know im saying this after having spent so much to just get here but that wasn't even money we had and it feels like we're being reminded of how we don't deserve to be here I don't know. It was very humbling anyways, and I could tell my mum wanted to cry and I was ready to zone out but it got sorted.

We get into the room, I'll share some pictures later cos it is nice in here. I go into the bathroom and do what I usually wind up doing when I hold stuff in and start to cry, a bit from the malaise of travelling its been over 24 hours and I've not slept, a lot from the continuous bad luck, and the rest for the renewed discomfort of the hair oil on my head.

The mirror confirms one thing which is I look abysmal. The product she used on my hair has fried and looks like dandruff, my skin is blotchy, and it's a big oof. I get in the shower to wash out the oil...consequently, I wash it onto my skin and the rest of my body. I bawl whilst doing so.

My hair starts to cool as I dry off but my body starts to swell. My already thicc thighs be getting thiccer, my hands and feet swell. My body, limbs specifically have a veneer of numbness like when you fall asleep on your arm and it takes a while to get any feeling back. It's a bit concerning but I take another antihistamine and finally sleep.

We had planned on exploring last night but we did not go anywhere beyond our room.

Part 6. Fog and Furtive (?) Optimism

Today the bumps on my head feel smoother, I'm still swollen but less so and I am very thirsty. It has been a heck of a journey but if it is the price to pay to see Rhett and Link up close and personal I'll do it.

But I had to rant and feel sorry for myself on the internet first.

If you read this to the end I would like to both thank you and apologise. I am manifesting that things will only get better from here.

This weekend is gonna be Mythical!

[joker-daughter]

Yeah I think this has to be the most ridiculous argument of theirs 😐 Listen I'm really aware of racism in fandoms especially white fans attacking their fav girlfriend our of jealousy. They fucking suck and can go to hell

However, using the if you're not a Tomdaya or don't really care about what they're doing as a couple in their private life, you're racist card is so nasty. It's not a gotcha ? Racism is very much real and some of us (like me) are living it in real life so trust me when I say Z being biracial has absolutely nothing to do with us fans being more interested in Tom the actor than Tom, mister Zendaya. It's literally just.. two different subjects. And two different faces of the coin that is Tom as a celebirty. Nothing is wrong with liking one more than the other, it doesn't have to be labeled as hateful or racist or anything. It's just two DIFFERENT things

it’s also just preference? 😭 if you like him and his stuff more, great! if you like her and her stuff more, great! and if you like them both equally, also great!

[treinerahquel]

Chapter 5 Fieldwork: Racism

Racism is an issue that many minorities and people of color have been dealing with for countless amounts of years. This is an issue that many people have been trying to speak out against for the longest amount of time. This image is a clear depiction of racism because it shows how whites felt as though they were superior to those part of the black community. As shown in the picture, whites had the unwritten right to sit freely in the front of the bus. However, due to racial discrimination, blacks were forced to sit in the back because they were not looked upon as ‘superior’ compared to the whites. If there were no seats available for a white person on the bus, a black person was forced to give up their seat. This is a perfect example of racism and segregation.

Segregation is the action or state of setting someone or something apart from other people or things or being set apart. Due to societal preferences and misconceptions, those of a darker complexion were not allowed the same rights nor were they given the same treatment as those of the white race. As shown in the image above, there are three bathrooms. Clearly, there is a bathroom specifically for men and women. However, those part of the black community and those with a darker skin complexion are to use one bathroom; both for men and women.

Race discrimination involves treating someone, an applicant or employee, unfavorably because they are of a certain race or because of personal characteristics associated with race In today’s day and age, it is still hard for the typical minority to attain a job of good quality. The image above shows how those of another race, outside of the white community, will always be shunned. They will always be the last to be looked at due to this particular reason.

The perceived impact of skin color in the lives of U.S. Latinos is broad. From impacting their ability to get ahead in the country to shaping their daily life experiences to dealing with discrimination, skin color is seen by Latinos as an important factor affecting their lives and life chances. Similar to other minorities, Hispanics have been faced with racial discrimination also. Even in today’s day and age, they are still faced with this issue. They are looked down upon heavily by many in our society. This image shows how those of Hispanic descent were not allowed service due to the ‘superiority’ of the whites.

America is a country in which there are many people from all over the world. Although this is a extremely diverse country, it is still struggling to deal with insensitive issues. Some of these issues refer to racial discrimination against foreign language. Depicted in the image above, each one of the doctors holding up a sign, is showing the issues they deal with in the medical field. Racism travels all over, no matter where you are and no matter what field of work you are in.

Biracial couples tend to be faced with the most discriminatory issues, due to the fact that it is a relationship outside of one’s own race.

[nythabrat]

Chapter 5 Field Work: Race

institutional Racism is a form a racism that is embedded into our laws. It describes societal patterns and structures that impose oppressive or otherwise negative conditions on identifiable groups on the basis of race or ethnicity. Oppression may come from business, the government, the health care system, the schools, or the court, among other institutions. This phenomenon may also be referred to as societal racism, institutionalized racism, or cultural racism. Institutional racism has created an invisible chain holding down students of color in the educational system. Limitations and denial of access to education created a culture where students of color were treated as less than equals, a mindset that is still deeply rooted in our educational system today. While history has offered valuable lessons, there is still more work to be done in order to effect change in our educational system.

White Supremacy is the beliefs of white people that the white race is better than all other races. They believe they are the superior race and should dominate society. We had an American president who is a white supremist, Donald Trump. In the image above you see white supremist taking over the capitol and rioting. This act of white supremacy was initiated by the president himself. He encouraged them to "retake the nation" due to him losing the election. This shows how white Americans are concerned greater and held to a different standard. You have African Americans who peacefully protest and often times end up shot or imprisoned and these individuals were given slaps on the risk for storming a federal building.

Jim Crow Law were laws in southern states that legalized the enforcement of racial segregation. Many businesses and establishments were white only and prohibited "colored". Everything was separated from public Transporation, the schools, grocery stores and park and etc. and almost all the time, the white only things were far for better than the things for coloreds. The image above shows how black people were not allowed to share water fountains with white people, also you can see how the white only water fountain is better looking than the colored only.

Hypodescent is thought of automatic assignment of children of a mixed union to the subordinate group. Meaning if an individual has one black parent and one white they should be considered black. The thought of identifying a biracial individual as a member of the lower social ranking race. The photo above and the term "One Drop Rule" refers to any degree or African ancestry means your black. My nephew who is black, native American and white simply identifies as black. He will not say what else he is "mixed" with unless asked "and what else are you".

Microaggression in the text is described as "Common, everyday verbal or behavioral indignities and slights that communicate hostile, derogatory, and negative messages about someone’s race, gender, sexual orientation or religion” Being a outspoken strong black women I face microaggression a lot , the one I hear the most is " mad black women". and Also the name shortening, as a kid when teachers called roll and mispronounced my name, I would never correct them. As i got older I realized it was microaggression and I take it very personally when it comes to correcting people on my name and I will make sure my daughter is the same way. The image above gives examples of things people often say that is really micro aggression.

Miscegenation is dating outside of your race. This image is about how interracial couples were frowned upon back in the day. The marriage of this white man and women was placed on trial due to them getting married.

[kkyaka]

This is definitely a hot take, but the biggest reason why most biracial couples in TV shows aren't canon is because of white people

[blackstarising]

ok i promised myself up and down i wouldn’t make posts like this anymore for my own mental health but i’ve been seeing a lot of, uh, takes in regards to the potential of sarah and bucky dating and a lot of confusion to why these takes are racist, insulting and hurtful, especially to black people. and for me? well, i won't lie, it's personal.

what non-black people need to understand is that positive portrayals of interracial romantic relationships between dark-skinned black women (yes, dark skinned) and non-black men are extremely uncommon in media. for example, can you think about any recent fictional portrayals of relationships of this kind? maybe rick and michonne from the walking dead? or abbie and ichabod from sleepy hollow? great, because those are the only two that i can think of off the top of my head.

okay, now how many of those relationships ended happily?

right.

as a next point, why do i highlight ‘dark-skinned’? because of colorism. you’ve probably seen that word thrown around a lot more in the past year. colorism is the discrimination within ethnic groups between those with lighter colored skin (and more eurocentric features and hair texture, i’m folding in featurism and texturism for ease) and those with darker skin.

the way this plays out in visual media is that it’s much more common to see lighter skinned black women in roles than darker skinned black women. when i was growing up, this was evident in both white-produced AND black-produced media. that’s so raven. sister sister. my wife and kids. the proud family, even. and to make it worse, it wasn’t uncommon for dark skinned black women in shows like these to be portrayed as unattractive, uncultured, or straight up bullies.

this isn’t me saying that we shouldn’t see light skinned or biracial black women in media. i want to emphasize that their life experiences and the pressures they have are different from mine. but i know that, because of colorism, i grew up thinking that the absence of Eurocentric features and a non Eurocentric body meant i was not beautiful and not worthy to be seen. and these truths can coexist. this is not an uncommon wound of colorism.

i say all this to say that for bucky barnes, a white man, to flirt with sarah wilson, a dark skinned black woman, is not the same as ‘just another het ship’. it is positive representation in its own right.

now, i’ve been in fandom for years. i’ve encountered this before. and i’ve encountered this enough to know that truthfully, these kind of ships make people truly uncomfortable and sometimes these people do a bad job of hiding it. what reason, i can’t say. if you ask me, i suspect part of the discomfort comes non-black people realizing they can’t project onto the black person in the ship in the same way they’re used to. i could be wrong. but i’ve been around enough to see a lot of pretzeling and back bending to discredit these sorts of relationships that don’t seem to come up for similar pairings if that same black woman was now white. and i’m seeing it again here, so i wanted to break down the most common takes i’ve either seen or i suspect i’ll see soon and break them down to explain why exactly you’ve been getting irritated replies and why they’re hurtful.

“bucky’s flirting with sarah to make sam jealous.” without thinking about it, this is actually a funny trope. sibling rivalry and all that. and you’re right, bucky doesn’t have to be attracted to sarah, and maybe you ship sambucky instead. but what if he can still find her attractive? this take subtly discredits the idea that bucky could find sarah attractive in her own right - there has to be some ulterior motive in order to explain it, yeah?

“bucky repeated sarah’s name like that because sarah was steve’s mom’s name.” we do know bucky knows steve’s mom’s name! but again, this feels like a lot of reaching to again, rework bucky’s potential attraction to sarah in a different context so it’s not actually genuine. in this case, he doesn’t like her, she just makes him think of his dead best friend’s mom, right?

“sarah’s so strong and badass, she doesn’t need a man! she deserves better.” okay. what does ‘deserving better’ actually mean? why can’t a potentially fulfilling relationship for sarah, a hardworking widow with two children, be deserving better? this also plays into the Strong Black Woman myth, in which black women are just So Strong and Self Sufficient and Powerful they don’t need anything! not even social aid! or protection! or love! or mental health support! let me be clear, this trope is not fun for us, it’s not a positive, it’s a burden that allows society to justify not protecting black women.

“this seems kind of forced/crowbarred in to me.” maybe, but also, in the episode, they really just said 'hi' to one another. now if sam had caught them making out on the boat two seconds after they met, that would have raised my eyebrows, but they just said 'hi'. some people are interpreting that as flirtatious - i'm one of them. but again, using words like 'crowbar' and 'force' or 'shove' make it seem like bucky's attraction to sarah is irrational.

now, here’s what i’m not saying. i’m not threatening you to ship bucky and sarah Or Else. you don't have to. i do. i think it’s fun! but that’s my choice. you don’t have to make that choice. you could be shipping someone else with either sarah or bucky and you don't want something to get in the way of that, i get it. i'm also not saying that sarah needs bucky's validation to be considered beautiful, far from it. what i’m saying is it’s worth it to evaluate the ways that implicit racism is affecting and influencing your responses to interracial relationships with black people, and especially black women in the media. because even if you might not see it, there are those of us who can. why can't the prospect of a white man flirting with a dark skinned black women be taken at face value? maybe sit with that.

sources for further reading the roots of colorism, or skin tone discrimination the walking dead's new power couple: 'richonne' and fandom racism fanlore breakdown of 'what shipping richonne taught me about racism' black women and the thin line between strong and angry post on black womanhood and feminism what is featurism? black hair and mental health: a tale of texturism fandom and the intersection of feminism and race "weak black women" by robin thede (for giggles) the take's 'the strong black woman, explained' (yet to watch but the take hasn't failed me yet)

[skippyv20]

“Even before meeting Prince Harry, the former Suits star was vocal about some of the struggles she faced growing up as a biracial person. Her mother, Doria Ragland, is Black, and her estranged father, Thomas Markle, is white.”

Even before meeting Prince Harry, the former Suits star was vocal about some of the struggles she faced growing up as a biracial person. Her mother, Doria Ragland, is Black, and her estranged father, Thomas Markle, is white.

Meghan eventually landed the role of Rachel Zane on Suits, but said she still faced racial discrimination from fans, mainly due to the fact that they cast a Black actor, Wendell Pierce, to play the role of her character's father.

"I remember the tweets when that first episode of the Zane family aired, they ran the gamut from: 'Why would they make her dad Black? She's not Black' to 'Ew, she's Black? I used to think she was hot,'" Meghan recalled. "The latter was blocked and reported. The reaction was unexpected, but speaks of the undercurrent of racism that is so prevalent, especially within America."

Before marrying Prince Harry, Meghan ran a lifestyle website called  TheTig.com. In a 2017 post marking Martin Luther King Jr. Day, the actress recalled a time when her grandfather told her about his experience of moving their family from Ohio to Los Angeles. She said the story still "haunts" her today.

"It makes me wonder what my parents experienced as a mixed race couple," she wrote. "To Martin Luther King Jr., to Harvey Milk, to Gloria Steinem and Cesar Chavez, to my mom and dad for choosing each other not for the 'color of their skin, but the content of their character,' to all of you champions of change: Thank you."

https://www.etonline.com/everything-meghan-markle-has-said-about-being-biracial-and-the-fight-for-racial-justice-149362

Her past comments…I am highlighting the fact…she claims to have faced racial issues….BEFORE Harry….contradicting her claims…not until she married Harry….initially it was how difficult it was being biracial….she switched to being “black” when she married Harry….

[tweedfrog]

im sorry, but reading ur last couple posts it kinda sounds like you think Ned should have been more overtly racist and bc he wasn’t grrm is racist, but on the flip side giving arya prejudice thoughts also makes grrm a racist and a bad writer? like grrm for sure has dodgy bits but you’re giving him a bit of a no win scenario here. if he had made the targs black like originally planned do you think that would have been better or worse? (1/2)

ok im going to address this point by point because there is a lot of reaching and misunderstanding here

1. I am not here to present a ‘win’ scenario for GRRMs writing. I am discussing the shortcomings of the way he writes racism and yet uses racist tropes. A lot of these are as you state ‘no win’ scenarios because he decided to craft a world where racism exists while having extremely few characters of colour in important positions, AND while using racist tropes. There are many no win scenarios simply because of this tension.

2. I dont want Ned to be a more vocally racist character? And please point out where I said that Grrm was racist because Ned wasnt portrayed as having overt anti-dornish sentiment? I stated that because GRRM created a world where racism exists everything now has to be analysed bearing that in mind. It’s the same as stating that because misogyny exists in universe male characters are possibly (and likely) somewhat misogynistic and their interactions with with women and the way they treat female characters must be analysed in such a way.

Me stating that anti-dornish racism could have been a possible reason why Ned reacted less vehemently to the deaths of Elia and her children is me analysing it within the frame-work that GRRM set up. I’m using this to point out that when white authors add fantasy racism into a story they dont see the raicst implications of what they are writing because they dont understand the way racism impacts almost everything in real life.

For example in our world when non-white children or women go missing or are murdered their deaths are much less publicized than when white women or children get murdered or go missing. So yes racism affects the way that people are treated in such scenarios and when you decide to include fantasy racism in your story you have now included all of this extra stuff and need to do work to make sure that what you are writing does not perpetuate or enforce racism.

3. I literally never said arya having racist thoughts made GRRM a racist and bad writer. I have no clue where you got that. I used Aryas remark to highlight how anti-dornish sentiment clearly exists in the North because 9 year old children dont develop racist ideas in a vaccuum.

4. Where did I ever state that everything that happens to the martells was a micro aggression? I’m also confused as to where you got the word “micro” from??? Because idk about you but things like characters not really caring about the rape and death of a non-white woman and the deaths of her biracial children, a child being shunned because they “smelled dornish” and dornish women being hypersexualised in the narrative are some pretty macro aggressions.

5. Finally you deciding to ‘not discuss the essoss stuff’ is missing one of the main points of what I am trying to say. GRRM’s writing isnt racist because sometimes bad things happen to the Martells. The combination of his writing of the dothraki as savages with no introspection when compared to the free folk, the brutal killing of many martells for shock value, the contrast between the way he portrays Lyanna and the way he portrays Elia, the exotic/erotic trope he uses when writing dornish women, the fact that he hasnt named the princess of dorne while all her male counterparts have recieved names AND backstories and the fact that he made a white character the centre of the essoss plotline and a whole host of other decisions combine to make his writing....kinda racist. If it happened one time it may be a coincidence. If it happens about 10 times its a pattern.

Would it be racist if the Starks were written as inuit and then split up? Probably - given the history of murder and brutal seperation indigenous families have faced! Would making the more visibly indigenous stark children plainer while making the more white passing stark children better looking be racist? Probably - considering the way that eurocentric beauty standards are still upheld! With GRRM his issue is that he doesn't use 1 or 2 racist tropes in isolation. That could be a mistake. He uses several in succession.

Regarding the Targaryens being Black I think that if he wrote them in exactly the same manner (unlikely given how he treats other characters of colour) it likely wouldnt be racist but that the fandom probably would take it as an excuse to be racist.

So now that weve gotten through all of that straw-man criticism about my “take” I’m actually going to suggest some ways that he could have still written about fantasy racism without accidentally perpetuating it

1. If he is going to brutally kill off Elia he needs to AT LEAST have more discussions surrounding her death. Who Elia was as a person (dont just make her a sad cardboard cut out - I want to see some background on who she was outside of being an abandoned wife and mother). One story about Elia by Oberyn isnt enough. I also want to see more societal shock about Elias death because theres a weirdly small amount. The rape and murder of the crown princess shouldve been an extremely huge scandal and should have horrified many more people.

2. Theres no real way to kill off two non white children and have their white sibling be a prophetic hero without dicey implications so Aegon needs to survive and be the actual Aegon and not a secret blackfyre. We dont know if he is a secret blackfyre or not so this may just be a case of the fandom taking an excuse to be racist and running with it

3. Have more Dornish characters that dont die brutally for shock value (Elia, Oberyn, Quentyn). Furthermore when you only have 2 povs of dornish characters,,,,and you kill one of them off, yes that is not a great look

4. Dont introduce the only WoC pov in the whole damn book nipple first and as a blatant play on the brown seductress when she has legitimate political concerns and greivances

And thats only the dornish characters! With the dothraki and most of essoss just.....anything aside from what he’s done would be better. But of course im sure none of this is actually racist writing decisions. No its simply complex characterisation of course!!1!

[shinpredicts]

Marriage - long post 3

Here's part 1 to the marriage post

Here's part 2 to the marriage post

Marriages with Foreigners

While doing readings, there are a lot of people who have strong desires to marry a foreigner and live abroad. Many times they want to live in Korea (we have kpop and kdramas to thank for the great marketing that they do for Korea.) This makes me want to point out that we should not glamorize marriages with foreigners. Just because you are married to a foreigner doesn't mean your marriage is better than other people's marriages or that you and your spouse have a more interesting love story and a deeper connection than other non foreigner spouses do. Just because you married a foreigner doesn't mean that your married life will be smoother than others' married lives.

In fact, my personal opinion is that when you marry a foreigner, you face more challenges. These challenges become even more apparent when you are the one that moves abroad for your spouse and settles in their home country.

Let's say you are the one that moved abroad for your spouse, you will inevitably face culture barriers and language barriers. The language part is an assumption made on part that your language skills are probably not up to the standard of a native's. If you happen to look like super foreign in your spouse's home country, then you'll probably face discrimination if your spouse's home country is very homogenous.

You will also probably face more trouble finding work compared to being in your home country for a variety of reasons.

You're probably leaving your family, friends, or whomever or whatever for this foreign country. You are losing a big support system if you've had some for this foreign country. That can be very lonely in a marriage like when you have a fight with your spouse, you don't really have someone to turn to in person or even on the phone due to time zone differences etc.

Even if you fully learn that foreign country's language, you can sometimes still be considered a foreigner for life. Why? Simply because you weren't actually from that home country and look like the people there.

You might not be fully accepted by your foreign spouse's family. They can be racist. They can be very traditional and want their kid to marry a local person. They probably will have communication problems with you because they don't speak your language and probably aren't familiar with your culture.

And here's another problem that you have to face when you have children as a foreigner x non foreigner couple. Some people think it's so "exotic" or having biracial children somehow leads to "pretty" people. Stop. Stop that thinking please. Biracial children often face issues with their identity and they often get bullied at school, especially if the biracial children live in a country that is very homogenous (i.e. Japan/Korea.) Racism unfortunately is still very prevalent so depending on the biracial children "look" they can be treated ok, well, or poorly. That is a sad reality that exists today. Biracial children often feel like they connect to 1 culture but they also connect to another culture. They're neither fully there or fully here, which can make them very confused and frustrated. Though they may speak their native tongue fluently, because of their looks, they can still be treated as a foreigner, especially in a country that is very homogenous. If they can't speak the other parent's language fluently, then people also judge them for not being able to do that.

Divorce/Separating from a Foreign Spouse

Oh, and let me just say divorces/separations with a foreign element are horrendous. If you have let's say A is from China and B is from USA. They both have decided to live in USA when married. They met in China and lived there for a while. However, A later moved there for B because B couldn't find a job in China. A has some asset like a condo in China bought pre marriage. A would prefer to have the divorce done in China because Chinese law makes it more favorable for A. B would like it done in USA because it's easier. Who gets jurisdiction over this divorce: China or USA?

Let's do another example with children now. A is from Korea. B is from England. A and B have 2 young kids together. B moved to Korea for A. A wants the children to remain in Korea and wants them to stay in Korea. B wants the children to go to England and live with B and their family. Where should the children go: England or Korea? Who gets custody of the children? How does the other spouse get to see the children like the parenting schedule?

Let's do a 3rd example. A is from Japan. B is from Ukraine. A wants a divorce. B has left and disappeared to Ukraine. A wants to serve B the divorce papers. How to serve them to B? What rules to follow to serve them to B????

Let's do a 4th example. A is the foreigner. B is from a local country. A moves to B's country under some marriage visa/spousal visa application. A needs to be married to B at least X years to get their citizenship in B's country. B wants a divorce 1 year before A fulfills the X years of marriage needed to get B's country's citizenship. Now what?

I'm not saying don't get married to a foreigner. I'm just saying that you shouldn't glamorize foreign marriages. Just because someone has married a foreigner doesn't mean that their marriage is going to be great. If you're just wanting to get married to someone from a certain ethnicity, I think you're just setting yourself up for a recipe for disaster.

[itsthem]

Life of a biracial girl.

Introduction

I'm biracial. My mom is black and my dad is white. When I was born, the nurse asked my parents if they wanted to check one box on my birth certificate. My mom said we're going with two boxes because "she can't just choose one." Unfortunately, by law in 1998 you could not. So when I was born, I became a member of a very unique club: The biracial community-- who had to choose one race.

Life as a biracial girl can be complicated.

Life as a biracial girl can be complicated.

It's not easy to be forced to spend your life explaining who you are, where you come from, and what that means for your identity—but that's the reality for multiracial people. Biracial people are faced with racism from both black and white communities, which means they often have to prove themselves in order to gain acceptance from either side of their family tree. On top of all this, there's also ignorance about being mixed-race; this is especially true when it comes to men who date interracially (like me!). While I understand why some people might have reservations about dating outside their race (or even dating within theirs), I think we should all strive for love above all else.

The day I was born, my identity began to form.

When I was born, my identity began to form. I discovered that race is a social construct and not a biological one. It’s a racialized system that has been used throughout history to oppress people of color.

The day I was born, my identity began to form. The day you were born too! We have both been forced into categories with which we do not identify—categories that are often meaningless in the eyes of outsiders but have personal significance for us (and our families). This can be difficult at times because sometimes the world doesn’t understand how important your self-identification is—but it's okay! You can choose who you are and what you want to call yourself without feeling bad about it!

My parents are a different interracial black and white couple

My parents are a different interracial black and white couple. My mother, who I call Ma, is black with strong roots in Arkansas. She's from Pine Bluff. My father, whom I call Dada, is white and is from Ozarks of Arkansas. He lived all over the country as a nomad before settling with my mom.

My Ma is a free thinker who isn't afraid to speak her mind or try new things; she'll take risks that most people wouldn't dare dream of! She has always been open minded about sexuality and race—two things that some would consider controversial today (thank goodness). When she met Dada at a party in Pine Bluff, their connection was undeniable: he danced to the "Perculator" like a peacock trying to impress his attraction—all while getting down to the most popular black songs! It wasn't long until these two got married after nearly ten years together (and yes...they divorced), but during those years there was no doubt about how much love they shared for each other!

Dada pushed me hard when it came thinking outside the box...I called him a walking encyclopedia because how borderline genius he was; he passed away in 2018 that felt like part of my identity shedded away with him. He always wanted the family back closer together so we could spend more time together even though he was in and our a good portion of my childhood.

The day I was born, my identity began to form.

You may be wondering why I am writing you with the authority to speak on behalf of your identity. The reason is simple: I am biracial, and therefore, so are you.

It's not a new phenomenon to be biracial in this country or anywhere else for that matter. In fact, there are many people who have been born into different cultures and raised outside their parents' culture for hundreds of years now—and those people have formed their own identities as well.

I'm not here to tell you how your identity should form; but if it has already begun its formation process, I can assure you that it will remain fluid until death (and maybe even beyond). If anything, my experiences show me that being biracial means having an endless amount of options when it comes time to decide which side of yourself is most important at any given moment in time!

My yellow skin and curly hair told the world that I was black.

I am a biracial girl. My yellow skin, curly hair and freckles told the world that I was black. I had this thing for girls who looked like me—big curly hair, perfectly mixed facial features of both black and white sides, and black skin. As biracial lesbian growing up with hardly and biracial people to look up to, I desperately found beauty in anyone who looked similar to me. I thought it was cool to have a White father because the facts are true-- biracials with this combo genuinely have a different behavior or outlook on life.

What does it mean to be mixed?

What does it mean for your identity?

But seeing my mom and dad together told me I was biracial.

You’ll notice that my mom is black and my dad is white. That’s because they both grew up in America, which means that their parents were American.

On the outside, I look like my mom but on the inside, I look like my dad. Usually when people see me they assume that I am hispanic because of how my skin looks (the color). But if you look closely at me and listen to what I say or read what I write, then you will know that I am biracial!

All my life people have tried to make me choose one side or the other.

All my life people have tried to make me choose one side or the other.

When I was a little girl, I didn't know what "biracial" meant and neither did anyone around me. When I was asked what my race was, it seemed like an easy question: "I'm black." But as time went on, people started asking me if I were white or something else. And then came the question that haunted me for years... “So which side do you prefer?”

As though there was some hierarchy of humanity where every person is either black or white—and most importantly, they had to choose which one they wanted to be!

"Check white, black, asian, or hispanic. Must choose one answer."

Gazing at the form, I'm filled with a deep sense of shame. Suddenly, I'm acutely aware that my mother is black and my father is white—and that this fact about me has no place in this bubble. Each question asks me to choose one answer: "Are you white? Black? Asian? Hispanic?" Must choose one answer! Must choose one answer! The only way to fill out the form correctly is by choosing one thing from column A and another thing from column B—and then hoping that it all adds up correctly.

The box for "black" isn't even big enough for me to write my entire name in caps. There's not enough space for me on this page at all; there are plenty of boxes left over after I've checked off every category except "Other" (which doesn't really describe anyone). In fact, I could argue that there are too many categories on this form: How does anyone fit into so many boxes? Who am I supposed to be when asked these questions? And why must there be only one answer per question?

I feel like an animal trapped within a cage made up of stereotypes and assumptions; each response reveals something new about who they think I am based solely on how they perceive my heritage as a whole rather than seeing any individual parts within themselves as well as what makes each person uniquely beautiful in their own way."

The internet bullies biracial people

The Internet is not a safe place for biracial people. It's a place where people feel like they can be anonymous, and unfortunately some use this sense of anonymity to bully others. They are called names; told that their race makes them inferior; and sometimes even threatened with violence.

The internet has always been a breeding ground for racism, but it has recently gotten worse than ever before. The rise of social media has made it easier for people with racist opinions to find each other, which has led them to openly share those opinions in places like Twitter, TikTok and Reddit—places where their cruel words would have once been hidden behind closed doors or screened by an editor at the local newspaper (if you're reading this article on Medium).

"What are you anyways?"

"What are you anyways?"

If you're a biracial person, chances are that at some point in your life, someone has asked this question. Some people who ask this question mean no harm by it. They're just curious about how you look, who your parents are and what ethnicity(s) they come from. Others use the question as an excuse to make fun of or belittle biracial people like yourself.*

So let's talk about what "being mixed" means for you and for others...

Learning that my experiences matter is one of the most powerful things anyone has ever told me.

Learning that my experiences matter is one of the most powerful things anyone has ever told me. It was something I never knew before, but now it's something I know and believe in deep down. Everyone has a story and everyone's story matters, no matter what color they are or where they're from or who their family is.

My experience growing up as a biracial girl taught me how important it is to be proud of who you are and where you come from. It can be hard sometimes; there will always be people who try to bring you down for being different than them, but if you stay true to yourself and your values, it will all work out in the end.

I think it's important for us all to remember that we should all respect each other no matter our differences because everyone has something different about them that makes them special!

Conclusion

I’m not going to lie, life as a biracial girl has been challenging. But the more I learn about myself and others like me, the easier it gets. The internet is full of other biracial girls who have gone through similar experiences. Even if they don’t know who I am or what I look like, knowing that there are others out there who understand makes all the difference in how I see myself!

[mistwraiths]

1.5 stars

I'm a sucker for books set in 1700s and upon beginning to read it learning that it featured a biracial couple, I was very excited. However, this book was just really unenjoyable for me. I really tried but near the last 100 pages, I started skimming because I was desperate to finish and I regretted not DNFing this earlier.

Look, I'm not an idiot. I know homophobia and racism were there. I just didn't expect it the book to go so hard for that when I believed I was getting a romantic adventure of hijinks and consequences of reckless actions. But those two along with abuse factor in the book predominantly. It's dealt with in an unflinching way and historical though. But I thought this was going to be a fun lighthearted romance but I didn't really have fun at all.

The main problem is Henry Montague himself. Monty is probably one of the most insufferable characters I have ever read. I expected him to be a bit of a rake, promiscuous and maybe sarcastic or cheeky. He's just deeply self-centered and says quite awful things without any care or regard. And he knows sometimes after that he's said something he shouldn't have but he never goes out of his way to apologize or make an effort to be better that isn't the lowest bar of decency. He's constantly unaware of his privilege and getting rude with people. He tells his black friend, and the one he's in love with, to go serve drinks at one point as a comeback when the servants are actual slaves. He calls a girl a whore when he shrugs off the comment his sister made about the consequences the girl he half undressed being left behind to deal with the people who caught them after he ran away naked would face. He whines that his black friend doesn't stick up for himself and doesn't try to understand that he couldn't get away with half the shit Monty does. That's just a few off the top of my head. He also just doesn't think about anyone else? He whines about his life and I really don't think he ever just asks anyone else about their thoughts, their feelings, their problems, their day. It is very much Monty charges forth and everyone else doesn't really get a say.

I know the book was trying to make me believe that Monty was going to grow but like... I couldn't really find any evidence he did. He doesn't make an effort to apologize for the things that he's done. There's a "Oh I'm so awful I can't stand myself" bits but that's not enough.

Percy and Felicity were better characters by far and made reading this book slightly better. Felicity and Monty at least felt like siblings. The romance was just okay for me but honestly because I think Percy is a Saint and dealt with more awfulness than he should have.

The pace was definitely good since they were always going and going, but the plot itself was a little everywhere and wild. I did not expect a whole alchemical plot with a dead but not dead person with a cure-all heart or whatever. The stealing and being chased across countries and pirates-ish were enough. I might have enjoyed it more if I liked other things.