so on the subject of the "Crowley is secretly Revaan/Laverne/Levin/please Twst give us his name" theory, I think my feelings are best summed up as "I don't really buy it, but it's funny". like, in all seriousness, I'm not opposed to it; I have enjoyed the writing in Twst so far and I'm willing to trust that whatever happens will, you know, make sense and not be terrible. but I'm just not really convinced by the current evidence! maybe that'll change once we learn more, we'll see!
with that said, may I propose a few alternate theories about the possible Crowley/Revaan connection:
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Saw trap critic. She keeps doing bad shit so she can get trapped, gets out of the saw trap easily, and then writes an article rating the experience on her blog. She has thousands of followers. John fucking HATES her but trapping her just makes the cycle repeat, so he has to live with seeing “hydraulic press trap, didn’t move fast enough to be a threat, 4/10” all over the internet
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I actually found mob! Howdy and Wally character.ai! Here: https://beta.character.ai/public-profile/?char=ehPv8PY3PyAHazrSVnPE1HMzhaDasjvQ1vfvHRa7AIg&username=MilThePerson
(It's actually a crazy ride cause I wanted to rizz Howdy but Wally came out of nowhere?? I didn't even know it could do that lmao)
Ps: I'm new on tumblr so if these look weird, i'm sorry in advance hehe
O YEAH I SAW LITERALLY AFTER I POSTED
I haven’t used it (yet) but my friend has and confused the shid outta those two KDHDGHD
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push your face down on my chest
and your heart ain't nothin' but the best
and now a dog's a stray
but i'm gonna stay
aka the bucktommy cowboy au nobody asked for part one (part two) (part three)
(song insp.)
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Ruby: Hey, Jaune! How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie-pop?
Jaune: Let’s find out!
Jaune: *wraps the tootsie-pop with his tongue and strips it clean off the stick*
Ruby: 😱 HOLY CRAP! Jaune, how do you have such a powerful tongue?!
Jaune: Pyrrha says it’s important to strengthen my entire body so she gave me a tongue exercise regimen. I’ve been training since Beacon!
The night before…
Jaune: *dutifully carrying out his nightly tongue exercise routine* 👅💦
Pyrrha:
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@heart-pirates-week || Day 5 || Clione/Food
Does Captain love sweets cuz Clione always makes em or does Clione always make sweets because Captain loves sweets???
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Have you heard of the "Crowley is Malleus' dad" theory going around? Where Prince Levan (or whatever his name is) didn't actually die and just went out to get some milk and is now known as Dire Crowley, the silly man? The implications of that theory is absolutely hilarious when you think about it
hold on, we can figure this out, we just need LISTS
PROS THAT CROWLEY IS SECRETLY REVAAN/LEVAN/LAVERNE/WHATEVER:
unspecified fae of some kind, with similar coloring to Mal
the animal masks are apparently a Briar Valley thing
has some kind of big blackmailable secret that was alluded to in episode 4, and then as far as I know never brought up again
(unless this was just Azul bullshitting, which is extremely possible)
based on Diablo, which...maybe means something?
has canonically worn Dad Shorts
CONS:
(gestures to Crowley's entire personality)
NO LISTEN Revaan was the guy they sent off on diplomatic missions and to take care of delicate political situations, and...look, I love this dweeb, but would you trust Crowley to be in charge of negotiating your war treaties
despite my brain insisting on reading his name as "Raven", Revaan's title does imply that he was also a dragon (or super into longan berries, I'm not ruling that out)
currently unclear why Lilia "my closest friend Revaan...he is no longer with us...I used to make fun of him for being kind of a priss about eating jerky..." Vanrouge has somehow not noticed or said anything
Malleus' Aloof Anime ~Aristocrat~ vibe had to come from somewhere, and by all accounts it was NOT his mom's side of the family
???:
turns into a bird in the opening, I don't know if that means anything but it's kinda cool, I guess
all that aside, if Malleus and Yuu are any indication, then the Draconias have...questionable taste in their social choices. so anything is possible!
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