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#then he no longer considers himself strong or on gojos level
reckless-rider · 1 year
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I HATE TOJI I HATE HIM SO MUCH
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777gojosgf · 5 months
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ALWAYS AN ANGEL NEVER A GOD
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777GOJOSGF IS TYPING…
777gojosgf: tired!reader x satoru gojo
IN WHERE :: no matter how hard you try, your efforts will never be recognized as much as the ones of the strongest sorcerer.
a/n :: angsty time!
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YOU STARED AT THE mission report containing information on your latest mission handed out by the principal and that pitiful feeling swarmed in your belly. it didn’t make sense. you had a perfect score on everything but somehow it wasn’t considered enough and you were still not named a special grade.
it certainly couldn’t be your fault, not when you had spent morning and night training at the grounds of jujutsu high. you barely had an ounce of sleep as you had tackled the training dummies for hours, trying to boost your stamina by running for miles and trying to adapt to your cursed technique. you had never taken a break, always having your eye on the prize.
you were always ahead of everyone at a young age when you still attended a normal public high school, excelling at every subject and the teachers always praising you for your efforts and high marks. but everything was different now that you were suffocated by the terrors and demands of the jujutsu world.
in the realm of jujutsu, you had become lost in an abyss, and you were no longer the greatest. the smartest, the one you had to defeat to win. no, you had lost your prodigy label and had to start over because intelligence was not the sole requirement for survival. to learn how to fight and defend yourself, you must have physical strength. act rationally rather than emotionally.
as a result, you trained yourself until you were blue and bruised, and there was never a day when you didn't start the day with a morning workout and/or a night session. you had this need to be the greatest at everything, unsure of whose approval you sought. it did not matter. you only wanted the gratification of doing good and being respected for it, to be feared rather than despised. however, your hard work was in vain because you were not promoted to a higher level.
what the fuck did they want from you?
and when was it ever enough?
before you realised it, you had crushed the mission report, which had fallen from your strong hold onto the floor. you weren't sure if you were angry or sad; maybe it was a combination of the two that was boiling deep inside and surging through your body. it was so puzzling because you had trained yourself and knew the answer to everything. missions were no trouble for you, and even single missions went well; why the heck haven't you been named a special grade yet?
“what has gotten you into such a buzz?” you heard coming from down the hallway as you turned around only to face the sorcerer you had envied the moment you had become a jujutsu sorcerer yourself. of course it was the fucking six eyes himself.
with lengthy steps, he effortlessly filled the gap between the two of you, his gaze drawn to the crumbled paper on the ground. he used his skill to raise it up and unfold it so he could read what it stated, but he didn't understand why you were so upset about it. it was an excellent mission report, with no further casualties or difficulties. what was the big deal?
"you. the higher-ups. fucking everything, okay?! i’ve worked my fucking ass off for years. i still have the scars from when i initially visited these grounds and worked out till i fucking blacked out, just to resume once i woke up. do you realise how damn fortunate you are? how do you get practically everything? you can do whatever the fuck you want because you are goddamn gojo satoru— that is my problem." you yelled angrily with shaking legs and hands, angry tears welling up in your eyes, but you knew it wasn't fair because he hadn't chosen this kind of life and how everything turned out was simply a matter of luck, but you couldn't keep your indifference hidden.
if he had felt hurt by that, you wouldn’t have known because there wasn’t any kind of feeling displayed on his face. instead, he leaned against the wall with a blank expression and averted his gaze away from you, a small sigh escaping him.
suddenly it had felt as if the world collapsed on you as you slid against the wall and eventually sat on the ground with your arms on top of your knees, your head buried into your arms as the angry tears had trailed down your face. it wasn’t fair. nothing was fair. the higher ups, him, but also the way you reacted wasn’t something he deserved that and you knew that deep down. but still— it was bound to come out sometime.
“i’m so tired…” you whispered to practically no one at all with a shaky breath, your eyes closing as you felt a headache starting due to the amount of crying and a strained voice by yelling. you had expected him to leave and find something useful to do, to not take this venting bullshit from you.
instead, you sensed his presence next to you as he sat down with his legs spread out on the floor. his back was leaning against the wall as he looked up, but he hadn't said anything yet, and you weren't sure whether he was going to. it did have a strangely soothing sense with him seated next to you.
soon enough, he had silently wrapped his arm around you and moved you closer to him. you hadn’t questioned any of his actions, you couldn’t when it felt as if there was a cloud above your head. Instead you nestled into his side and looked up at him teary eyed. “i’m sorry.” you breathed out defeated and gave him a weak smile which he only shaked his head to in response.
"don’t worry about it. you have a point, but i didn’t chose this either. you know? but it's true that they haven't been treating you fairly; i expected you'd be promoted months, if not years ago." he remarked, but he couldn't meet your gaze even though he had removed his blindfold, his white hair strewn haphazardly across his head. you merely nodded, about to open your month and clarify that it wasn't his fault, when he placed a finger on your lips, causing you to scowl.
it made him chuckle, the scowl you had on your face. he admired your feistiness and ability to stay strong even though things weren’t working out. perhaps it made you even stronger than him in a way.
“i know what you’re going to say, but i shouldn’t have showed off my abilities everywhere. however, i’ll fix this. alright? you just go and have a good night sleep.” he reassured you which only left you confused. how was he going to fix this and what for? you had basically just thrown a tantrum like a small child.
your thoughts were interrupted as you felt him drop a kiss on your head, causing blood to surge to your cheeks. you were about to comment on it, but he had already stood up and reapplied his blindfold, making his way to whatever he was planning to do.
"hey, satoru!" you yelled out from behind, still seated on the floor, arms on top of your knees. he came to a halt in his tracks and casually turned around; if you hadn't known better, you could have imagined there was a faint red glow on his own face.
“thank you.”
“no worries, y/n.”
the next morning, you awakened and put on your uniform, eager to get out of your room, until you discovered the mail slipped beneath your door. you frowned as you kneeled to the ground and picked up the letter. as you read what it stated, a huge grin appeared on your face, and a sense of victory ran through your body.
you were officially named a special grade.
you had no idea how satoru had done this or how he dealt with it, but you were extremely grateful. you realised you may not have earned what he had done for you after complaining about him in such a dramatic manner, but you couldn't help how you felt.
though it wasn’t long before you managed to figure out a way on how to thank him.
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neonscandal · 8 months
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Something I realized is that gege akutami doesn't create many punishments for ''bad'' characters other than death. I think an interesting punishment for the geto character was to create a binding vow in which he was obliged to save humans and never harm them I would have liked to have seen him save those he hates and abhors most.
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⚠️ Implied spoiler warning for season 2 of Jujutsu Kaisen.
I think Jujutsu Kaisen has such an incredible unbalance between the lives of the "good guys" and the "bad guys" to the point of being hilarious.
SORCERERS
The show is from the perspective of the good guys of which there are never enough. They're also never quite strong enough. They are frequently shown fighting for their lives even when its a 2 or 3 on 1. They are struggling and suffering casualties and even Megumi vocalizes that losing a partner is not uncommon. Even innocuous missions like the one that introduces us to Megumi could end horrendously and it was not looking good for him before Yuji ate that finger which effectively leveled the playing field.
CURSE USERS AND CURSES
When I think of shows like Tokyo Ghoul or My Hero Academia, the "villains" are working in the shadows and condemned to move in secret. Not in Jujutsu Kaisen. The main antagonists are living their best life playing soccer on the beach, playing video games, relaxing while they lay in wait for their plan to come together. The quality of life compared to sorcerers is absolutely laughable and this sense of comfort stems from the fact that they are so numerous compared to that of the sorcerers.
THEME OF GOOD vs EVIL
If I thought about it, I'd assume that Gege Akutami is essentially using this imbalance to perpetuate the idea that there is no benefit or glory in being good. Empirically, anyone we've seen with earnest intentions has been killed or driven to their literal breaking point. Good guys who operate in a shade of grey or, as Gojo put it, are a little crazy, seem to fare slightly better. A perfect example is Nanami who left his salaryman job because the money wasn't worth how soul crushing it was to return to jujutsu society to stringently enforce the protection of children. Inversely, Mei Mei, his foil, is essentially a mercenary, gratuitously extorting others before she'll consider taking on a mission and comfortable with insider trading and being wildly inappropriate with her brother. Only one of these characters makes it to a vacation in Malaysia.
Mei Mei is just one example. We see that, even within the ranks of the jujutsu caste system, not only are some of the Big Three families unscrupulous as hell, but, even the elders handing out death sentences appear to be somewhat corrupt if Gakuganji and his off the books mission to kill Yuji is any indication. It's hard to stay good and sincere when the payment of trying to help people or do the right thing seems to just be... suffering. ✨ What do you think this persisting theme means for the possible ending?
PUNISHING GETO
Like, I know he "hated monkeys" but it was informed by the difficult position he found himself in. In his mind, he appointed himself a savior of the weak when jujutsu society just asked him to exorcise curses. Work not necessarily befitting a child, mind you, but he internalized so much pressure to give it meaning that it was always going to backfire because how much self-flagellation can on take before they begin to question the point of their suffering?
Lowkey, I think Geto was already going through it with his course of action. To our knowledge, his current kill count includes: the people in the village, his parents, the man who ordered the hit on Riko Amanai, and that one guy who accosted him when he was still haunted by curses after no longer contributing financially to Geto's group.
I'm not saying Geto is a good guy. But I also don't think he was radicalized so much as to not feel the weight of what he'd done, the original transgression. He had to give it a reason for it to sit right in his mind, had to vehemently commit by killing his parents to cement the idea of this conviction even though he knew it was unrealistic and impossible to achieve. I concede that I might be over humanizing the antagonist because, at the end of the day, if Geto could trick his mind and heart into believing his mission was pointing due North, perhaps he could do as needed without continued angst or questioning.
Especially since, after everything was said and done, homeboy looked like this. 👇🏾
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Come up in the spot lookin extra fly-head ass.
Imagine how disgusted he'd feign, pushing off grateful people after they've been save and just spraying deodorizer spray like -
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Let's take your idea and add a sprinkle of this comic by @keniaku as recommended by another anon to really turn up the silly.
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sukirichi · 3 years
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reckless [01.]
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With a lackadaisical playboy as your boss, being reckless wasn’t an option. But on the one time you let loose and made mistakes, your life is shattered, and now you’re playing house with your insufferable boss who is the father of your baby.
✘ cw. explicit smut, accidental pregnancy, playboy! gojo, slight angst
✘ note. dedicated to wifey @7tsumurai​ who also made the banner and always supports me and showers me with love aaaa i love you baby <3 also this fic is mostly romance and fluff so i hope you enjoy this as much as i did writing it! thank you to @chosonore​ for pr-ing UWU. and we get like...10-15 chapters of this?!
one  ✘  two  ✘  three
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You shouldn’t be doing this.
The night was young; streaks of gold flashing with the shimmering jewellery collared on your neck, the romantic humming of the violins pairing perfectly with the champagne that fizzed in your hand. It was supposed to be another day at work where you accompanied your boss to one of his events, considering the Casanova refused to bring his girlfriends in fear they might get the wrong idea he liked them outside the bed. It should be just another day at work; you’ve accompanied him hundreds of times before. Today wasn’t any different.
And yet it was.
You blamed it on the alcohol. On the slow dancing. On the fact he hadn’t stopped complimenting you all night and you’d been so stressed, the amount of planning and sleepless nights sacrificed in exchange of preparing for this event made you grab for three more flutes, the touch of your undeniable attractive boss permanent on your waist.
Satoru was equally aggravated. You’d worked him long enough to recognize even the smallest of cues, and the fact you’d spend nearly every hour of the day working with him for weeks straight in the office let you know he needed to let off some steam.
And what better way to relieve both of your tensions if not to give in to the cloud of lust?
The sultry gazes, the clashing perfumes between rose and musk, and the alcohol – the fucking alcohol – that gave way to you succumbing to your desire just this once.
There were no more thoughts – or if there were, they were muddled – as you kissed him back just as passionately, forgetting the fact his stylist spent an hour gelling his hair back to perfection as your eager fingers traced over his scalp. How you ended up in the back of limousine was beyond you, and neither was it your biggest concern when Satoru insisted you kept your heels on; his large hands caressing all the way from the ankle pressed beside his waist up to your waist.
You felt his daft fingers move the lacy thong you wore especially for tonight (not because you expected something, but the boost in confidence felt necessary) before he slides inside almost too easily.
Both your gasps and moans are swallowed in the stuffy compartment, windows fogged saved for the handprint you’d left when he hit a sensitive spot. He was moaning in your neck, skin slippery and sweaty as you slid from one another, seemingly never staying from one place as your hands treaded through his hair down to rake your nails on his back; his touch angry on your hips before his thumb found home in your clit.
As much as you hated him, hated his reputation, you couldn’t deny he really earned his title for being an absolute god in sex. You were no virgin, but you’d never felt this good, never felt this alive as bruises began to form in your skin and his lips hungrily sought out yours.
“S-Sir...”
“Satoru,” he corrected through your lips, the kiss barely even one when you were too busy moaning left and right. Satoru hitched your leg up to fold it right beside your waist, allowing him to explore deeper territories that not even you could mark.
His stare on you is perverted; openly wanton as he lets his empyrean gaze snake down to where your bodies connected. It was embarrassing to be this spread wide open for him, though it didn’t matter much, not when you clutched onto his bicep for dear life and panted breathlessly. He was kissing you everywhere – smearing your lipstick all over your lips and his, a stain of red on his hard, white collar and love bites marked deep into your collarbones and under your breasts. You tightened around him once he changed his rhythm into a more sensual one; the quick pace replaced with him pulling out slowly – inch by delicious inch until you felt empty with each growing second – before slamming back inside with fervidity that he never quite possessed behind his desk.
He groaned at your walls clenching down on him, his hips stuttering in the process. “Call me Satoru.”
“Satoru,” you moaned out, and his next sounds were pained. Pained because you sounded too gorgeous, felt too good, and with you following his hips thrust by thrust, neither of you would last any longer. Not even as you shake your head, lips swollen as you remind him, “We shouldn’t be doing this.”
“We shouldn’t,” he agreed with a curled lip, sweat beading from the streaks of his white hair. “But I want you – god, you’re so beautiful tonight. Need to fuck you good—”
Gojo Satoru, one of the most eligible bachelors in the entire South East Asia and ranked as the second richest man in his early twenties, was a man of his word despite his reputation. Just as he was praised and fawned over for his beauty, charisma, and power, he was equally hated for breaking the hearts of women and treating his past ‘lovers’ like they were objects. The news were so confident of it; that he fooled them, played around with them, but behind the scenes, you knew Satoru wouldn’t do such a thing – from the first time he laid his eyes on someone, he made it extremely clear they were not to be attached. Everything with him was physical and sensual – anything beyond that would simply be out of character.
You weren’t surprised that he really did keep his word and fuck you good, because you couldn’t feel your legs the next morning and even though it had been hours, you still very much felt the shape of him carve through you.
The bastard wouldn’t stop laughing, of course, snickering under his breath every now and then each time he saw you grimace from doing simple things such as standing up and giving him the files he asked for. Perhaps it was because your dislike for him was apparent that Satoru quickly went back to fooling around, pretending you didn’t exist and only approaching you when need be. There were still moments you had to clean his mess up for him; taking his drunken phone calls at 3am because he got wasted in a bar, or doing the same for his current sex buddy who he didn’t want to stay in his home.
He was terrible, terribly awful that you despised this part of him.
You were only grateful enough that neither of you brought that night up ever again, for no matter how immensely hellish of an experience it had been, it was also something you’d really rather not be reminded of.
But now, there was no more running away from it. The truth stared at you blatantly in the form of two white lines that had appeared four times already from previous tests.
You were pregnant.
The world had never been that heavy on you. You had a rough upbringing, but it was a household filled with love and patience that it was innate in your nature to keep strong, be levelled, continue moving forward even during the times it felt like everyone and everything was going against you. You’d been through so much worse and you can do this, but you still couldn’t stop the tears that pushed from your eyes, your heart shattering the same time you dropped the stick.
“No, we won’t cry, it’s okay. I can handle this – I’m strong,” you repeated to yourself like a mantra, taking deep breaths to stabilize yourself. Clearly, this was unexpected, but you wanted to do your best, had to do your best. You didn’t have time to lose your composure, so you quickly fished your phone out your purse to dial the person you trusted the most.
“Rei...?”
Your best friend picked up on the second dial. “Sweetheart, where have you been?! I’ve been calling you for like hours now and you’re not picking up, I heard you called in sick for work and you never do that even when you’re about to pass out!” Some shuffling could be heard from the background before she spoke again, her tone a lot more gentle in response to your muted sniffles. “Is there something going on? Do you need me to drop by there right now? Tell me what you need; I’ll be there right away.”
“No, no, Rei, it’s fine, I just...”
“Sweetie,” she sighed, “You know you can tell me anything, right?”
You nodded even though she couldn’t see it. Rei had been there for you in everything, starting from when you newly arrived in the city; fresh-eyed and hopeful for new opportunities. She’d been there when you first complained your boss was a creepy flirt, all the way until you’d made peace with said boss and remained firm in your boundaries. But those boundaries had clearly been crossed – no, rather, you erased those boundaries. You were drunk enough to give in to the need to be touched, but sober enough to consent to everything that happened. You couldn’t place this all on him.
“I’m pregnant,” you said eventually, voice barely above a whisper as you added, “And Satoru’s the father.”
Rei stopped munching on her – you assume – bagel.
“Satoru? Gojo Satoru, your boss, bonafide casanova, the face on billboards and one of the most “eligible” bachelors in the country, billionaire Gojo Satoru?” she let out in one breath, the image of her flipping her hand out in the air in disbelief as clear as day. “Am I really hearing this right? I’m not going crazy, am I?”
You sighed.
“We were drunk. I slept with him.”
“Did that bastard force himself on you?”
“No, gosh, never,” you defended with widened eyes, sitting back down on the toilet with the lid now closed. You couldn’t look at the tests even if you dared yourself to, the plastic bag concealed in the garbage or else you’d feel sick all over again. “I-I wanted it too...we just got carried away and the night was just...I don’t know. I don’t know what came over me and why I did that, but there’s no point in fretting about it because I’m carrying his baby now.”
“Well,” she started unsurely, “What are you going to do?”
“I’m keeping it. There’s no way I would even consider abortion.”
“But what about him?”
The back of your head throbbed in pain. Just thinking about his stupidly handsome face made you want to throw up once more. “I don’t really want to tell him, but he has a right to know that he’s going to be a father.”
“Will he even take responsibility for it?”
You swallowed nervously, nibbling on your thumbnails before snatching your hand away. Composure was something you didn’t struggle with; you were the more reliable one in the duo of you and Satoru, but you had a bad habit of picking on your nails whenever you were anxious. Had it not been for Satoru flicking your nails away from your mouth each time you dazed out a little bit, you would’ve never gotten rid of the habit, but it all came crashing back down on you in an instant.
A heavy knot formed in your belly.
“Most likely not, I know how he’s like. He loves his single life so much that he’d never allow to be tied down like this. I wouldn’t even be surprised if he tells me he doesn’t want it.”
“What an asshole!”
“Yeah, he is, but I don’t need him in my life,” you reinstated, finally feeling more confident the longer you talked to Rei. She was your instant hype machine in more ways than one; her presence itself gave you the reassurance you could handle everything your way. With hope blooming in your chest, you picked yourself of the toilet and wiped away your tears. You could do this – you can handle this. Not just for you, but this baby growing in you as well.
“In our life. I’m more than capable of taking care of the baby myself,” you told her, gaze hard and determined as your sunken reflection stared back at you in the mirror. Sighing, you shook your head and pictured Satoru’s face, already picturing a thousand ways this could go wrong. Only one way to find out.
“I have to go now. He needs to hear about this and then I’ll resign. Probably move back home – anywhere that’s away from him.”
“Doesn’t the baby deserve to meet their dad?”
“Their dad doesn’t even want to be one,” you muttered bitterly and threw your sweater back on, refusing to kick yourself around any harder. Now wasn’t the time to be illogical; you were now a mother and had to be responsible now more than ever. But first, you needed some well-deserved rest after endless agonizing of missing your period, along with the baby drop that until now, had shook you to your core. “I’ll call you back, Rei. I’m very tired.”
“You let me know if you need anything, okay?” Humming in response, you ended the call and crawled back to bed.
It wasn’t that you felt lonely, but you didn’t feel particularly belonging anywhere. You were far from home in a city that felt like the future, and each day you come home, it was mostly just a place to rest before you went back to work the next day. It was a dull, empty routine that you’d gotten used to, but never had it sunk deep into you that you did felt completely hollow.
But not anymore.
You were with your baby now, and as much as it scared you shitless to be a mother with zero preparation and knowledge, you were confident things were going to be okay.
Wrapping an arm around your belly, you had the best sleep you’d had in years.
You’d just have to worry about tomorrow. Hopefully, and you quite prayed harder than you ever did before, Satoru would let you go and keep things less complicated than it already was.
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“No,” Satoru shook his head, his words dropping like a heavy boulder in the middle of nowhere. You stood in front of him shock still, hands wrung solid beneath your belly. Satoru merely shook his head, brushing back his gelled hair with a dry laugh. “No, what are you even thinking? You’re not resigning.”
You pursed your lips. “I wasn’t really asking for permission, Sir.”
Truth be told, you expected this sort of reaction from him. It may be true that you and Satoru never got along in personal levels since he was too crass and you much stiff, but it couldn’t be denied you worked well together. You balanced each other’s flaws and brought out the best in one another. If someone had asked you years ago prior to you being employed by the heir if you could even tame the renowned free spirited man, you would’ve said probably not, but after sharing struggles and quite literally forcing one another to do better, you both reached highs neither expected to achieve.
It was an experience and a whole lot lessons learned working with him.
Unfortunately, all things must come to an end, and you had to leave even if Satoru negated to it.
“We’ve been working together for years. Do you know how many people I fired and have resigned all because they’re not equipped for the job?” he plopped down atop his desk, loosening his tie out of frustration. The simple gesture made you swallow and look away – it felt impossible to look at him any other way than a boss now that you had his baby inside you. Thankfully, Satoru was mouthy as usual that he pulled you back from your train of thoughts as he gestured between the both of you. “You and I are perfectly compatible – I can’t let you go like that. I’m sorry, but I need you. There’s no one else I can work with this functionally. No one else is as willing to tolerate my bullshit except you and...I need you to stay.”
You clenched your teeth at the desperation in his voice.
Satoru admitting he needed people was one thing. But him asking others to stay? It may have just been for your value as the only person who had put up with him in both his best and worst times that made him feel that way, but you had to keep your foot down on the ground.
You wouldn’t let him sway you like this.
Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes and willed all your energy to spring forth. “Sir...I’m more than thankful for all the opportunities, it truly was a pleasure working with you but—”
“Is this because we slept together?” he cut you off, your shoulders tensing. Upon your silence, Satoru heaved himself away from the desk and took cautious step towards you, stopping a foot away when you stepped back defensively.
You almost wished you didn’t know him so well. His eyes shone with a flicker of hurt before he masked it just as quick as it had came – for Gojo Satoru was a master of many things, and a great actor was one of them. Cautious, you had to be cautious, and you clenched your fists behind your pencil skirt as you tore your gaze away from his pleading ones. “It is, isn’t it?” he affirmed with a clear of his throat, looking just as lost as you did. Satoru stuttered for a minute before he eventually composed himself, but even then, he didn’t sound half as sure as he wanted to be.
“Listen, whatever happened that night, we can forget about it if you want. We’re both adults and professionals – we can put this aside us and just go back to normal. You don’t have feelings for me, right? So then it shouldn’t be a big deal.”
“Satoru...it’s not like that.”
“Then what is it?” he demanded, aggravated. Satoru began to round his desk and pulling out little white envelopes, stacking them before you in a haste. “Do you want a pay raise? A new car so you could get to work easily? O-or perhaps a bigger house where you can work more comfortably, somewhere nearer to the office? All you have to do is tell me and I’ll give you what you want. There’s no need for you to resign, this company has given you everything and we’ve got so much offer just as you could still be great—”
“I’m pregnant.”
Satoru’s slender fingers halted around the pen hovering over a cheque slip. “What?”
“I said I’m pregnant,” you exhaled, biting down on your bottom lip to prevent yourself from quivering. A quick sweep from your face to gather sincerity trailed down to your belly, staring at you hard enough as if he had the ability to look through your soul. “And you’re the father.”
“Is that true? Is...is it really mine?”
“Yes sir,” you nodded, “I’m not telling you this because I expect that you’ll be responsible for it. No offense, sir, but I’d really rather raise the baby alone. Plus, I understand that you’ll never settle down or suddenly abandon your old ways just to—”
“Stop right there,” he raised a palm, “You mean to tell me you’re resigning because you thought I wouldn’t take responsibility for it? For you?”
The hurt in his voice and expressions were evident, lip curled in disgust; not for you, but rather of himself. Satoru was the type of man that couldn’t be withered down even with the harshest of rumours; you’d never seen him be affected before by tabloids and nasty ex-girlfriends who only slept with him for money or fame, only to talk smack about him afterwards. But now, he was crumbling before you, and you didn’t know quite what to say or feel over the vulnerability present in his cerulean eyes. It almost pained you know that you caused this – for the comforting, blue sky to be tainted with a thunderstorm that hinted of anger, of disappointment, of betrayal.
But could he blame you for not thinking the best of him?
“I’ve worked with you for years, sir, I know you.”
“Clearly not well enough,” he chuckled sarcastically, “Admittedly, I’m surprised, but not upset. The only thing that I’m upset about is that you actually believed it would be better to raise the baby – our baby – alone like I don’t even have a right to be in their life. Sure, it was an accident, but we made that. That’s our child and I’m going to take care of you and be a great father, even if you don’t think I’m capable of it.”
“Sir, I didn’t mean—”
“That’s the first time you said something stupid. That’s our baby. We’re a family now,” Satoru’s hesitance had vanished into thin air as he was on you the next instant, hands shaky before they landed on your shoulders. It was meant to be a comforting gesture; a reassuring one, yet you couldn’t help but flinch and falter under his gaze. As if getting the message, he quickly retracted his hands and shoved them deep inside his pockets with a sigh. “You don’t need to resign or worry about anything else. I promise I’ll give you both the life you deserve, just...just please don’t go. Now that I know we have a baby, there’s just no way I can let go of this and pretend I never heard of this at all.”
You swallowed, rubbing your sweaty palms on your skirt.
Out of all the different scenarios you stayed up late at night to turning your head in one by one, none of them included this. Undeniably, he was an asshole to most, but maybe he was right.
He hadn’t done anything wrong to you and he was still the father of your baby; he deserved a chance. Satoru had the right to be the father he was willing to be. You could already tell this might completely turn into one big mess, but his eyes were so hopeful, his smile so nervous yet expectant that you couldn’t help but say –
“Okay,” you relented.
His reaction was instantaneous. Satoru beamed and lounged at you, arms wide open for an embrace before realizing at the last second you could stab him with a pen and not regret it. One warning glare sent his way and he was retracing his arm behind his head, pretending to stretch with an off-tune whistle.
The sudden switch between pained and enthusiastic gave you whiplash, but you really shouldn’t be surprised. This was Gojo Satoru in the first place – he was as unpredictable as nothing was permanent and lasting to him.
It could be both a blessing and a curse.
For the sake of your baby, you genuinely hoped it was the former.
Not wanting him to get too ahead of himself since you still didn’t trust him enough, you raised a finger to poke him in the chest. Right now, you were no longer his secretary that openly despised him but added six sugar cubes in his coffee just as he liked anyway, but rather a woman who shared this mess with him, and as the mother of his child. You had to be strong. Being with Satoru felt like playing with fire, and you had far too much at stake – both of you did – but you weren’t privileged and fortunate like Satoru. One bad thing thrown his way could be brushed off, but for you? Everything you worked hard for could disappear just like that.
If you really chose now to play with fire, you had to be careful not to be the gasoline that ignited things to burn down into ashes.
“Satoru,” you stressed with your lips pressed into a thin line, “The only thing I expect from you is to be is a good father to our child. I know that it would be difficult for you to be a new person in a day and that your old habits won’t die right away, so please do what you can to be a good parent, and I’ll be with you every step of the way. I promise you don’t have to worry about me getting in the way of your life as well.”
His smile slowly vanished.
“Is that how low you really think of me?” he echoed rather sadly, “That I would still sleep around knowing I’ve got a family now?”
“We’re not a family, Sir. I have no intentions of marrying you nor would I ever want it. I’m just staying for the baby.”
“Fine. For the baby, let’s both do our best,” he crossed his arms on his chest, pumping out the hard muscles from how tight his shirt was. You were stuck between wanting to slap him or be closer to him; the hormones too much of a mess that you had to grip your thigh for restraint. “But tomorrow, you’re moving in with me. I’m going to take care of you from now on – I’ll get you whatever you need so whatever it is, just tell me. My credit card is yours to use as well.”
Move in with him? You wanted to laugh. That was the last thing you would want to happen.
“Sir, it’s fine, I’m capable of taking care of myself.”
“I didn’t say you weren’t, but I want to take care of you both,” he reiterated, growing slightly annoyed from your rigidness. You professed that you were being difficult right now, but it was much better than being easy around someone like him.
“We don’t have to be friends or lovers, alright? I know you don’t see me that way and I’m probably repulsive in your eyes – which is understandable since you always clean my mess up for me – but as a father, at least, let me do my job. There doesn’t have to be anything between us other than a mutual want to be good parents. Is that alright with you?”
You mulled the thought over in your head. So he was capable of being sensible sometimes, and after a few moments of silence, you narrowed your eyes at him.
Still suspicious and your guard was most definitely still up, but he was right. You both had a mutual want to be good parents and that was the most important thing right now. Everything else that complicated matters would be handled afterwards.
“I’m okay with that, but I would have to set down lots of boundaries if I’m living with you.”
“So you’ll really stay with me then?” You regretted nodding in response because Satoru was now fishing his phone out, a goofy smile on his face.
He took the news...surprisingly well, and you didn’t know what to make of it.
“Perfect! I’ll have your room prepared!” You tried to grab his arm to stop him from going overboard; knowing full well Satoru always had rushes in which he impulsively overdoes things. He might turn your room into some sort of grand suite that you wouldn’t really like, but he was far too excited and lost in his own thoughts that your words went from one ear and out the other. “Fuck,” he laughed to himself, “I’m going to be a dad.”
Whether it was relief or anxiety that bubbled through you, you had no idea.
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It was definitely anxiety.
Satoru felt like a hyper child to be around, and as much as you were grateful that he was happy about this, you also wished he would calm down. You didn’t even have enough chance to settle in before he’s shoving you inside room by room, announcing that what was his was also yours and he would have a baby room set up next week.
You followed him around like a puppy as he marched into the kitchen, mumbling incoherently to himself about baby proofing furniture.
“Sir,” you called out, “Sir, listen to me. We need to talk about boundaries.”
Satoru blinked owlishly at your tired eyes, sheepishly smiling at you. It must’ve dawned on him that his speed tour of his penthouse felt a lot more overwhelming than welcoming, and he sat you down on the island stools before drumming his fingers impatiently on the cool marble. “Sorry, you were saying? I kind of got carried away.”
Carried away was far an understatement.
“I said, we need to talk about boundaries.”
“Oh, yeah, right,” he paused with a furrow in his brow. “Also can you just call me Satoru? We’re going to be parents anyway and it’s awkward if you keep uh, calling me Sir.”
“Fine,” you rolled your eyes, not really in the mood to argue with him right now. You had to keep intact with him while you still had his full attention. Taking out a little notepad you prepared the night before, you slid it over Satoru who tilted his head to the side rather cutely to read it. “So here are my boundaries. One, I don’t want this pregnancy to be announced in the media unless I’m ready. I understand that we can’t keep this a secret forever but I need time to process this. Two, just because we’re living in the same roof together doesn’t mean that I get to go anywhere and everywhere with you. I’m going to work by myself—”
“No.”
“What do you mean no?”
“I said no,” he repeated more firmly this time. “You’re pregnant and I want to make sure you’re safe at all times. I’m driving you to work.”
“Didn’t you just hear what I said? I don’t want to be seen with you.”
“You’re my secretary. People see us together all the time.”
“But you never drove me to work! I live far from the office and I most definitely don’t drive an Audi.”
“Things change, that’s your life now,” Satoru shrugged nonchalantly, stealing the pen you twirled in your hands. The sudden contact sent jolts of electricity from your knuckles, one that had you recanting your hands back to yourself. Satoru didn’t seem to notice as he crosses out the second rule, “Sorry not sorry but I don’t want to let you go places like that. Fine by me if you don’t want me to drive you, but at least have one of the chauffeurs take you somewhere if you really don’t wanna be seen with me.”
“Fine,” you gritted your teeth. Compromise, compromise, meet in the middle – you repeated to yourself to keep your sanity. “Rule number three: I don’t want you changing your attitude around me. We may have a baby on the way, but you’re still my boss and I want to keep our relationship professional.”
“You’re saying I’m not allowed to fall in love with you?”
You flicked his forehead, effectively erasing the teasing grin he wore. “That’s not going to happen,” you interjected irritably, although your heart skip a beat. That was a massive red flag already; you could never be too comfortable with him. For Satoru, his little comments here and there may come naturally and probably meant nothing to him, but there was a chance you could receive it with different interpretations. Shaking your head at him, you ignored his grumblings on how ‘mean’ you were. “We’re never going to be a couple. We’re just raising a child together. I don’t want you acting weird or too comfortable with me.”
Satoru scratched the side of his head as he mulled about it, “Are we allowed to be friends, at least? I understand the professional part, but I can’t imagine the both of us getting along for nine months and more when we act like boss and employee even alone at home,” before you could say anything, Satoru raised his hands in surrender. “I promise I won’t do anything weird to you. No offense, but you’re not really my type, so same as you, I view you platonically.”
Right. The heart surely was stupid and confusing.
You didn’t want him getting any ideas that this could lead to something more, but at the same time, it hurt a little to know you weren’t his type.
Hiding that pang of hurt behind a tight lipped smile, you forced yourself to agree with him. “I view you professionally, Sir.”
“Satoru.”
“Whatever,” you grumbled. “Rule number four: don’t bring home any of your fuck buddies or flavour of the night. I really don’t care if you sleep around, but respect my privacy and my standing as the mother of your childIf you’re really desperate to get your dick wet, go fuck them somewhere else.”
“You’ve never been this vulgar with me.”
He wasn’t wrong about that. Despite countless of times that he tried being friendly with you to ease your stiffness in the office, you always shot him down.
You came to the city to work and provide for your family, not to be friends with your annoyingly hot boss who enjoyed his life way too much. Unlike him, you were more work than play, and eventually Satoru respected the fact you would never speak or treat him casually.
Until now.
“Try being in my shoes and see if you’d still have the patience of a saint,” you mumbled under your breath, sighing when Satoru’s smile got more awkward. “Listen, Satoru, I don’t mean to be difficult, okay? It’s just...this is a lot. This isn’t just us about anymore – we’re going to be parents and that’s a huge responsibility. It’s not only our lives changing here, a child will be relying on us in the future and I simply want to be a good mother, but I also don’t trust you very well to be comfortable enough to act like we’re suddenly friends.”
“I understand that.”
“Good.”
“Do you have rule number five?”
“No, not really, but I can add more as we go.”
“I have a rule number five,” he piped in, flipping the notepad his way as he scribbled something down. “And it’s that if you need help – and I mean with anything – you would let me help you. I’ve worked with you for a long time and I’m not dumb enough to not notice you like to do things by yourself. Like you said, things are different now, and especially with this pregnancy, you’re not alone in this. You need to let me take over the wheel sometimes. I can’t be just a passenger in the car – you and I are both in this together.”
“Just keep your hands to yourself.”
“That’s easy,” he chirped, and there was that uncomfortable knot in your chest again. However, it didn’t sink in too deep because Satoru was blatantly staring at your belly, a small smile tugging at his lips. “So do we have a name for them already?”
“Satoru, I’ve only been a few weeks pregnant, I don’t—”
Conflicting his previous statement that he’d keep his hands to himself, Satoru suddenly dropped to his knees. You watched with wide eyes, too flabbergasted to move as he places his ear on your belly.
“Hi there, little one,” he spoke in a soft tone, large hands caressing the tiny bump beginning to form. You couldn’t move; hell, you could barely breathe from how comforting his touch seemed in contrast to your mind ringing warning bells above. His voice quickly pulled you back to reality as he flattened his palm, white lashes fluttering against the cotton of your shirt. “I’m your daddy; I can’t wait to meet you. Daddy promises to take good care of you and make you the happiest kid ever, alright? You don’t have to worry about anything as long as I’m here.”
“D-don’t spoil them too much, Satoru.”
“I’ll try not to,” he chuckled. Satisfied with that small moment he had, he straightened up and trudged over the dining table that was far too big for a man who lived alone. In that moment, an image flashed in your mind – that someday that table would no longer look empty as you and your child shared meals with him. You could already imagine how heavenly the sun would shine on the glass windows behind it, the flowers gathered in the middle of the table blooming to life.
Out of nowhere, it struck you.
Could it be that this was why he loved this baby so much after only knowing about it for a few days? Could it be that Satoru really was alone?
“Okay, we should probably have a welcoming dinner! The chefs left me something tonight. I forgot what it’s called but I think you’ll like it. Grab some wine on the cellar for me?”
“Satoru, I’m pregnant.”
“Oh, right! My bad,” he clapped his hands together before pulling out ceramics and a cold pitcher, “Just water for mommy then,” Satoru said absentmindedly, completely oblivious to how your mind short-circuited a few feet away from him. He went about his way ignorant to it all and gently tugged you to sit with him, eagerly digging into the heated meals as you realized both of you hadn’t eaten.
For a guy who talked a lot, dinner with him was surprisingly quiet. Other than the occasional clinking of utensils against the plate, you enjoyed the silence with him.
You wouldn’t have believed it to be possible since Satoru made it his daily business to always fill in the gaps. Peace and comfort stretched before you the whole time, however, that for a moment, just a short moment, you found yourself letting your guard down. Even when you both caught each other’s in the middle of a bite, you found no tension or awkwardness in it. Perhaps it was the familiarity of being beside each other for years now that this should feel natural, or maybe it was because you both mutually agreed on wanting the best for your baby. Whatever it was, you didn’t want to overcomplicate it right now.
“You know, I’m really excited about this. I can’t believe I’m actually going to be a father,” he mused through a bite, swirling his red wine through his glass. Satoru gazed at his reflection almost dreamily, seemingly too deep in thought that he felt far from reach.
Or maybe you were the one who was detached, the one who kept pushing him away, because you could offer him nothing but a lame nod. “I’m glad to hear that...”
“What about you? You don’t look too happy.”
Your eyes widened at his worry. “No, I-I’m happy, of course. It’s just...it’s unplanned, and I’ve had my whole life planned out that I’m not really sure how this will all fall into place together.”
“Hey,” he laced his fingers with yours, squeezing warmth back into your skin that you hadn’t noticed turned cold from the nerves. Unlike his usual self with eyes brimming with glee, you could only see tenderness in him now, some sort of silent vow through a private smile shared only between the two of you in that moment in the solace of his home. Your home. “I promise I’ll be there for you and the baby every step of the way. I know that I haven’t had the best reputation and I have zero idea on parenting, but you’re not alone in this. You can trust me on this one, just like how we always trusted each other during work. Being a parent and running a business are both responsibilities right?”
“Yeah...”
“Well then you already know we work well together. We’re great partners!” he cheered, patting your shoulder way too bro-like. You resisted the urge to cringe. “We’ll be great parents, Y/N. I’m sure of that.”
Unsure of what else to do, you squeezed his hand back. He was right, you would be great parents as long as both of you never gave up. The thought of eating meals with him again with another addition to the table made you smile, and you hadn’t noticed you were spacing out, thumb running over his knuckles that were smooth for a man who never knew a day of hard labour. It wasn’t until you felt something prodding at you metaphorically, and you chuckled nervously as you saw Satoru smiling mysteriously at you.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Nothing,” he grinned, “I’ve just never seen you this close before; not so much that I paid attention anyway. But this is nice – having you here, I mean. It gets lonely here sometimes.”
“Don’t you bring your girlfriends around?”
“I never make them stay,” was all he said, and just like that, whatever thread that was beginning to form snapped. Satoru released his hold on you and gestured to your plate, carrying the dishes in his hand before leaving you alone on the table. Like always – a whiplash. “I’ll clean up, you can rest in your room now. I’ll take care of the dishes.”
“Do you even know how to do them?”
“Yeah, my mother forced me to wash dishes because she didn’t want me to rely on the house help too much,” he informed, the new information shocking you right to the core as he put on dishwashing gloves and started scrubbing. From this angle, he sure looked damn nice and domestic in just a white shirt, hair ruffled down to bangs.  “I’ll be right there with you,” Satoru announces casually, spinning on his heel with red cheeks once he realized what he said. “For just a goodnight, I mean! We’re not sharing rooms!”
“Yeah, no,” you coughed out, “We’re definitely not.”
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It felt…surreal, to wake up in a room much grandiose than yours yet felt like home even for the first night. Satoru handled your moving in rather happily; you found him singing to himself this morning as he brewed his own coffee before realizing you were right behind him, sleepy as you lazily made waffles for the both of you. Everything flowed nicely and normally, like this had always been a normal thing that for a moment, you questioned once more what would happen next.
You were now getting ready for work, hands tugging at his tie because he was such a man-child who couldn’t even properly knot his own tie. His suit was custom tailored and he looked effortlessly gorgeous – beauty ripped straight from magazines he was constantly a front page of, but his tie was skewered and loose that it irritated you.
“You’re such a mess without me.”
Satoru bent down to wiggle his brows at you, thought you didn’t notice because he wouldn’t stay still for you to fix his tie fast enough. “Isn’t this sweet; you fixing my tie for me as we both get ready for work?” he teased, “We’re like a married couple already.”
“If you don’t shut up, I’m kicking you in the nuts.”
“Then how can I give you more babies?” picking up the newspaper on the coffee table beside you, you rolled it and started whacking him, a string of profanities colorfully painting his otherwise monochrome and sleek walls. Satoru’s laughter boomed all over the room even as he wiggled away from you, clutching his bicep that had been the victim of your abuse. “Ow, ow, I was joking! Jeez, woman, you are strong. Fight men a lot like this?”
“I work with you. My fighting instincts are always activated.”
His laugh really was annoying. But it did help ease your nerves – though you’d never tell him that – as you sat beside him in his car, the expensive leather seats no longer strange to you. It would’ve felt like any other day where you accompanied him somewhere, except the reason was different now, and it came crashing down on you of your current situation that things were undeniably different from now on.
You immediately stepped away from him the moment you got out of the car, clutching your clipboard to your tummy when Satoru bumped his shoulder with yours. “Come closer, it’s fine. No one will suspect a thing,” he points to the crowded building with people bumping and walking past each other, everyone too occupied in their own heads to even notice you.
It wasn’t much, but hearing his voice and reassurances relaxed you, even for just a little bit. Maybe your first day at work after the baby news wouldn’t be so bad, after all, but it seemed you had spoken too early.
Satoru heavily insisted that you worked inside his office from now on.
Your desk was located right outside his office, the phone line always within reach in case you needed to pass calls to him or if he needed you to come. Satoru preferred the privacy of his own space – or so he said; he actually just didn’t want you to witness him slacking around and experience your wrath – but now he was dragging you inside his office, pushing your shoulders down until you were ‘settled in.’
You didn’t even want to ask where he got a new desk from, or why it had to be right across from him. His desk remained elevated on a few levels, the welcoming lobby of the room filled with couches and stacks of coffee with a rich amount of sugar cubes.
Safe to say, most of the morning was spent (or rather, wasted) on you telling Satoru off. The man was too persistent, coming in on the office at random times of the hour with either snacks or heaps of biscuits on his arms. He always greeted you with a wide grin on his face, only to be kicked out of his own office because you had his hellish schedule and events to deal with. That was around three hours ago when you’d asked him to shut up and go bother someone else. You were halfway around finishing your workload for today when the door swung open, a tuft of white hair and mischievous eyes peeking through.
“Hey! Just checking in on mommy—”
“Satoru!”
“What? It’s just you and I,” he defended with a shrug, welcoming himself inside. Surprisingly, he was empty handed, though the pout on his lips told you it was against his will. “Seriously though, do you need anything? Do you want snacks? Tea? Do you need help going to the bathroom? You haven’t moved in your desk for an hour now.”
“Satoru, I’m pregnant, not disabled,” you ignored him for a while, resuming to working back on his schedule for the month. There were a bunch of e-mails you still had to respond to, which normally wouldn’t be such a daunting task if Satoru wasn’t shifting his weight from one foot to another, the sounds of his shoes hitting the tiles in an annoying click-clack rhythm getting to you. “Will you stop fidgeting! Your anxiety gives me anxiety, stop that!”
“I’m sorry, I can’t help it, I just feel like there’s something I should be doing.”
“Shutting up and letting me work in peace would be great, thank you.”
“You really don’t need anything?” Sending him a warning glare, Satoru sucked in his cheeks and ran back to his desk where he hid behind the safety of his large monitor. “Nope, yeah, I got the message: leave you alone. Good luck with that then, I’ll need those archives to pull up for our meeting with the directors later at five.”
Muttering a sarcastic finally under your breath, you resumed working.
The routine was per usual – answer the calls professionally with a welcoming and sweet voice, a pen always in one hand to jot down notes in reminders, adjust his schedules, work out his plans, go to him whenever he needed to sign something before responding back to e-mails. You were focused as you always were, but someone wasn’t, and it was getting harder and harder to keep being placated.
It didn’t help that he made no effort to hide the fact he was slacking off, the tip-taps of him randomly pressing keys on the keyboard similar to a fork dragging down a plate.
“I can feel you burning holes at the back of my head,” you twittered, “What do you need?”
“Nothing at all. I’m just realizing how beautiful you are right now.”
You paused. Unable to deny your curiosity over how serious he sounded, you spun around in your swivel chair. Satoru had his chin on his hands as he stared right back at you, his face devoid of expression that you couldn’t pick up on a single clue. “Are you okay?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
You rolled your eyes at him. Of course the bastard would be teasing you, his loud chuckles a painful reminder of that. It was best to ignore him, so you went back to reading e-mails and forced yourself to focus on the task at hand. “We’re at work. Please stop distracting me; I can’t focus when you’re staring at me like a creep.”
“Sorry, babe, I’ll try to be less distracting next time, though I can’t control my charisma, you know!”
You jotted your thumb to your desk outside, “I can walk back to my desk where you can’t see me. That’d be a great for both of us.”
“Stay right there, I was joking!”
“Do you promise to be quiet and actually do your job if I stay?”
“With you disciplining and ordering me around like that, why not?” Mouth open for another heated retort, Satoru stopped you before you could say anything, his aura more serious this time. He was always like this; fooling around and maturing the next second, only for the cycle to repeat and test your patience. “I’m just teasing you, Y/N, I’ll shut up now. You’re free to end work as soon as you’re tired though; the driver is waiting in the parking lot whenever you want to go home.”
“I’ll go home with you.” Home. It felt weird to say that, but also…natural.
“You’ll stay with me at work today?” He sounded genuinely surprised, and you responded with a one-shoulder shrug. That seemed to be enough for him, however, and it wasn’t long before Satoru found the oh so rare and fleeting motivation to work hard.
Once he was settled, sleeves rolled up to expose his veiny forearms and brows furrowed as he centered all his attention on the pile of paperwork before him, there was no stopping him.
Roles reversed and positions switched, you were now the one unable to take your eyes off him.
In this light, in this moment, Gojo Satoru had never looked more beautiful. He was much the same as you in the manner you never really noticed each other this way before; not romantically, but even just person to person. In your eyes, he was nothing but your irritating boss whose boisterous self always crowded over your peace, and in his eyes, you were nothing but his secretary who he knew always silently hoped would leave you alone.
But things were different now. You were different now.
Boundaries there may be, you couldn’t help that fluttering forming in your stomach. Contentment, happiness, relief, nervousness – all of them jumbled into one big mess. Out of them all, however, there was most definitely adoration, either out of respect for his unexpected kindness, or simply because it felt nice to feel for once.
Turning away from him until your back was the only thing he could see, you hid your smile as you secretly held your belly.
You’d never been reckless before, but what was to be a good story when there wasn’t a mistake or two made?
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melliflovs · 4 years
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Beautiful Mess - Gojo x Reader
Word Count: 1,675
Warnings: Angst, longing, kinda sad
Summary: Reader comes to terms with her feelings after being faced with her emotions once she sees Gojo again for their monthly battle, even if it gets interrupted.
A/N: I didn't check this for errors cause my computers about to die but I wanted to post this for you guys!
Requests open!
In truth he found you incredible, but would he ever admit it? No. Of course not.
It was moments like this, the stars shining down on you and the wind blowing through your hair that made Gojo pause. He wished things could be different.
You could've been teaching alongside him, or anything else from the life you chose. He frowned to himself. Were you really happy?
At least twenty curses surrounded you. The dark purple aura slowly beginning to cover you from his view as you laughed in the distance. He just wanted a moment more to watch you before the inevitable battle before the two of you.
You knew he was there, close enough to see but too far away to touch. For now, you'd continue on as you were, playfully petting a curse on its head. It resembled a dog and chose to stay by your side, granted it looked and smelled horrendous but you'd take what you could get. They milled about you, waiting for their commands. They were all grade 3 curses, childs play for people like Gojo - people like you. But they weren't supposed to be strong, they were just to garner attention.
After the purple fog fully enveloped you Gojo knew it was time. You stood high on the tallest skyscraper, the clouds within reach.
You always thought Gojo was incredible. Irresistible looks, unbeatable strength, and a massive ego. Time spent with him was cherished, even if it meant small tricks and claims to get his attention but he never failed to deliver.
You heard his footsteps approach slowly, with your back turned the curses began to howl. A small smile tugged on the edges of your lips but you held it back. Slowly you turned to face him.
"Come with me." He said, Gojo had his hands in his pocket with a blindfold covering his eyes. You wondered if you'd ever be able to see them again.
"Traded out the glasses, huh?" You teased, "Do the students find it more intimidating." Sparks lit up your eyes as power began to surge through you.
Gojo smirked and flexed his muscles at you "I was always intimidating, just thought the blindfold added more flare."
He wished they'd stop sending him, the elders always too quick to call upon him once they knew you were involved. They started questioning why the job was never 'finished' they wanted you dead. You were the villain in this story, the creator of curses and sorrow. But how could someone so beautiful be so destructive? It didn't make sense to him.
The first time you'd met Gojo you were both 16. He was a student at the time, sent to a school to take down a low-level curse. It was a teaching method of his Sensei's to send his students alone on smaller tasks - one he ultimately ended up using himself. Instead, he found you surrounded in a purple haze curled into a ball.
You were so small at the time, anxious and afraid with tears streaming down your face. Gojo could feel the power inside you, radiating from your fragile body. It brought him to his knees in front of you. It was the first time you'd ever seen his eyes, hair hanging out in front of his face. He reached out to you, mesmerized by you.
He'd never encountered power like his before, different from his yet so similar in strength. Gojo was so distracted by you that he ignored the scattered limbs of what used to be your fellow classmates.
When he looked at you he was amazed, every single time. But you'd grown now, no longer the scared little girl who didn't know who or what you were. But you knew now. Years of hating yourself for what you were born as, what you'd accidentally do to people. Eventually, you embraced it.
In the years that you'd been actively on Gojo's radar, no one had narrowed down what you were. They knew you were human, a child abandoned and forced into foster care. From what he could tell your emotions were so strong that the smallest offense could make the curses in the surrounding 10 miles stronger and multiply them. You were no longer a grade 3 curse. You were special grade, a girl with explosive feelings that were considered to be on the same level as Sukuna.
You still didn't compare to Gojo though.
"Come with me, (y/n)" He repeated, his eyes desperate under the blindfold. He wondered if she could tell how much he wished she would listen to him.
She shook her head lightly, lowering her head to the ground. "You know I can't do that Satoru."
He nodded in response, he knew she was right. They'd execute her if she followed him back to the school. In a way (y/n) reminded him as Yuji, the elders were cowards whatever they couldn't understand they eliminated. Eventually, they'd meet the same unfortunate fate. Gojo wouldn't be able to protect either of them.
Gojo was shaken out of his thoughts by the sound of a single snap. Looking up he watched as all the curses surrounding her dive off the skyscraper and into the city set loose to wreak havoc. The dog-shaped curse stayed, wagging its crooked tailback and forth.
"Good," He teased, "Was starting to get a bit crowded up here."
The purple haze had almost completely disappeared from the rooftop once the curses left. You took a deep breath, "I'm not ready yet, Gojo. Ten minutes."
He jokingly checked his bare wrist as if looking at a watch "Fine" He pouted "But I'm counting."
You gave him a weak smile, walking over to the edge of the roof and sitting down, letting your legs hang over the edge. You'd be lying if you said looking down didn't make you feel sick, you were at least 100 stories above ground. But the lights were so pretty, the glow of all of them lit up the night, reflecting in your eyes. You felt his presence approach you, standing behind you as you sat.
"Why does it have to be this way?" You whispered, it was so quiet he might not have been able to hear you. It would've probably been for the best if he hadn't.
Hesitantly he placed his hand on your head, giving your hair a soft pat. He made you feel so little, so small in comparison. Just like the day you met. "Because life is unfair to powerful people."
You hummed at his response, "I wish things were different." You tilted your head up, looking at him through your lashes, hair falling in your face. "I wish we weren't such a mess."
"At least we're a beautiful mess." He said grinning down at you.
"I miss your eyes Gojo, why cover them like that all the time?" You asked, still staring at the dark blindfold. You could only imagine what shade of blue hid behind it.
"Decided not everyone should have the privilege to see these sparklers." The smile on his face grew as he said this, quirking his head to the side.
"Can I see them?" The more time you spent in his presence the calmer you felt. Gradually you felt the weight of your powers lift off your shoulder. A calm smile never had any trouble settling on your face whenever you were around him. It was hard to admit, even to yourself, but looking at his shining smile for the first time in months made you realize you'd missed him. "Please Gojo."
His grin faded into a soft smile. Nodding his head, Gojo reached up and began to untie the knot holding the blindfold.
"I think it's been ten minutes, Satoru. What do you think?" The voice made the two of you jump, Gojo's hands dropping away from the halfway untied covering. "Maybe you just got distracted with" He waved his hand around distastefully "This."
"Leave. Now." Gojo whispered, just low enough that the new man wouldn't be able to hear him. He seemed afraid, not of the man but of what would happen if any of his higher-ups found out about the two of you - whatever you were, even if you didn't know yourselves.
He stalked over the man, who was dressed impeccably in a white button-down. He held a wooden paddle tightly in his hand and pushed up his glasses as Gojo walked up to him.
"Look, Nanami, it's not what you think." He said holding up his hands defensively. Realistically he didn't know if his colleague would even believe any lie he could up of in time. Gojo tried to straighten himself out. Putting on his signature smirk, "You know how I get around the ladies. They just can't help themselves."
Nanami let out a sigh, looking at his friend with pity. "The way she looks at you... it's like she'd be willing to take a bullet for you." It wasn't normal the way you looked at Gojo. Like he was the sun and you were a flower stuck in the shade. "And I'm sure under that ridiculous blindfold you were looking at her like that too."
Gojo stayed quiet, the fake smirk dropping from his face. The silence hovered for a moment, making his chest fill with dread as Nanami thought it over in his head.
Suddenly he turned, beginning to walk towards the exit. "Come on, let's go."
"Are you going to tell anyone?" Gojo asked as he followed his coworker. He wrung his hands nervously together.
"No."
He let out a sigh of relief. A small smile began to tug at his lips, he was grateful to the blonde, not many people he knew would risk helping him like this. Subtly he looked over his shoulder.
Thankfully you were already gone, thankfully you were safe. At least for the time being. As he stepped towards the stairwell to make his way down the skyscraper, Gojo realized one thing:
You never got to see his eyes.
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moodymidnightkitten · 4 years
Text
Starlight Part 1
A/N: So this has become probably my longest fic yet, and I am so proud of it, I was going to do the beginning very differently but I grew to love it the way it was so I hope you all enjoy this as well. 
W/c: 2142
Pairing: Sukuna x Reader
Genre: fluff and very light smut due to the references to sexual activities
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"Master, a vessel has been brought about," your curse that is the embodiment of a cat said, approaching you as you were sitting on the balcony edge of your home. A beautifully large building hidden in the woodsy countryside. 
"Hmm, and for whom Chinami?" You asked your curse creature. She gazed up at you with galaxy like eyes. 
"Well master, it would seem to be Sukuna, the king of curses." She chimed ever so sweetly. 
"How troublesome, and no need to add the king of curses part, he's merely a speck of unimportance, but I guess a reunion is in order, do tell Chinami, where would he be residing?" You asked gingerly stroking the cats back, ruffling her ears causing a purr to resonate with her response. 
"Tokyo, at the Curse Technical College master, " 
"Please Chinami, drop the formalities, but I guess you and I will be going on a trip, it's been awhile since I've seen the school, how exciting it will be to check in on everyone." You got up from your spot and smoothed out your dress, grabbing Chinami and holding her as you began to get ready for your long journey. 
It wasn’t often you crossed worlds, but when you did it was always a delight to see how humans are faring for themselves. A comfort even. It was even nicer to be able to see the progression of humanity, and what a delight it was to come across humans who can control evil curses that linger and find themselves in the human world. It would seem as though your kind are less and less needed, a retired breed as some might say. So you and your people live your own lives like humans, but without the drag of evil curses, but that's not to say they don’t congregate every now and again in your world, but in your world they could just be considered as much as a nuisance as a house fly. 
But due to the changing times you made sure to dress more appropriately. Opting for leggings and a hoodie, although sadly you could not take the blue blush that lingered between your cheeks and over the bridge of your nose, golden stars and star formations decorated the blue blush as well, dark blue eyebrows and sunflower yellow eyes. You still stuck out amongst everyone else but no more than someone who was really good at what the humans called, makeup. 
Chiname rested upon your shoulders as you walked through the streets of Tokyo, eventually coming up to the school building. 
“Chinami, are you excited? I do believe this is your first time being here, even better, you get to meet some old acquaintances of mine.” You said, reaching your hand up so place it upon her head. 
“Of course y/n, learning something new about you everyday is the best part of being by your side, there is no end to the amazing things I learn about you,” she chimed in, nestling her head more into the crook of your neck. And with that you walked into the compound of the large school. Eventually seeing a tall man wearing a mask over his eyes, a man you so very well know. 
“Gojo!” You yelled, getting his attention from across the way, causing him to stop and look curiously at you. It took a second for him to register who you were but when he did he was absolutely over the moon and came rushing towards you as you sauntered over in his direction. He immediately wrapped his arms around you in a hug, something you shouldn’t be used to after not seeing him for a long time. 
“Y/n!! What brings you here on such a surprise visit?” He asked now nestling his cheek against yours. Causing a small chuckle to resonate within you. But you pulled away to give yourself distance between you both. 
“I think we both know the answer to my question, Gojo, how long have you been holding Sukunas vessel?” You crossed your arms and looked up to the handsomely tall man in front of you. 
“Oooo always so serious,” he said poking your cheek and then his attention was grabbed by the pure white cat that sat upon your shoulders, her galaxy eyes staring intently at Gojo. “As well as theres more introductions to be made, who is this cute little creature you have with you?” He said, not rustling the fur on Chinamis head. Causing her to get annoyed. 
“Please do not touch me,” Chinami said, twisting her head to the side. Causing a look of shock and surprise to show on Gojos face. 
“Oooo and she talks??? Well I shouldn’t have expected less, and my dearest apologies fur ball,” he said chuckling and bowing before Chinami, being called a fur ball just led her to be more annoyed. 
“Please, do tell y/n, what is this insatiable man to you?” Chinami asked, looking intently at you for answers. 
“It is a long, but good story Chinami, I will make sure to tell you one day but for now we have a more serious matter to attend to. Gojo, I asked you a question very nicely, and you know me enough. Do not make me ask again, where is the vessel and most importantly, who is the vessel?” Arms still crossed in front of you Gojo leans in and practically whispers in your ear. 
“Come with me,” now pulling away smiling, turning on his heel leading the way. 
“With pleasure, but while we are making our way there, might I add you’ve grown quite old Gojo, how old are you now? thirty-two?” you asked. 
“You would be correct, and the vessel's name is Yuji Itadori, a fun kid, he’s been the vessel for Sukuna for about four years now.” He replied, still walking and looking forward. 
“I very much dislike not knowing this information until this long afterwards, but I assume that he must have a strong character to manage a pest like Sukuna,” you said, 
“He is, he’s been training with him since he was sixteen, and has grown to be a very good asset for this school and other curse sorcerers, but ah here we are!” Gojo stopped in front of room in the hallway of one of the many school buildings. Gojo didn’t even knock before barging into the room. 
“Itadori!” He yelled practically now barreling into the room towards the pink haired boy who was seated on his bed. Eyes wide with shock at the sudden intrusion, looking at you both confused as to who the guest Gojo brought was but also kind of like a plea for help, to be released from Gojos grasp. But then Gojo pulled away and stood in front of him as you walked into the room and shutting the door behind you. 
“My friend y/n is here to speak with Sukuna!” Gojo said, making himself comfortable on the desk chair. 
“Ooo, I don’t know how I can get him out for you, since sometimes he just refuses to listen, but I’ll try my hardest,” smiling Itadori held his fist up to chest level. 
“No need, I already know how to get to him, just sit and relax,” you said walking over to the man sitting on the bed. Putting your hand on his forehead and nearly on the top of his head. 
“What I’m going to do is extend myself into his domain within your body, you see I know Sukuna personally, as were both from the same plane of another realm, but I assure you, as I’m speaking with Sukuna Gojo will begin to explain everything about me,” you said reassuring Itadori or your action, he nodded in agreement so now you begun to transfer your mental being into his. 
Within a few seconds you body appeared in a dark and dreary place, informing you that you are now most definitely in the domain of Sukuna, who from what you could see was sitting on a hill on a throne. 
“You really did make yourself at home within this man's body, didn’t you.” You said bluntly. A chuckle resonated from the man who sits above you. 
“Y/n, oh how I missed you, I am also surprised it took you so long, what have you not made any trips to the human world within the last four years?” Sukuna said, now rising from his seat and down the stairs towards you eventually stopping right in front of you. You looked up into his eyes showing no emotion, but why was your heart racing now? Why are feelings from the past now rising within your chest? 
“I’ve had no reason to do so until now, Sukuna,” you said. Sukuna bent down a bit to make straight eye contact with you, brushing his fingers down your cheek, your jawline and eventually trailing down your neck to your collar bone, wrapping his fingers around your neck and bringing his mouth to your ear. 
“Was it because you missed me?” his low and quiet tone was threatening your senses, causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. You stepped back, releasing yourself from his grasp. But he pulled you back in, making himself a resident of the side of your face, and also bodies now completely touching. 
“But I did miss you y/n, there was the constant reminder of you lingering around that weird white haired man, pray do tell what I’m sensing,” he whispered in your ear. 
“You’re not mistaken Sukuna, but what you think you sense no longer exists,” you tried your best to make it seem as though your rendezvous with Gojo was something that held no meaning. But Sukuna was not so easily fooled, he wrapped his fingers tighter around your neck. 
“You’re a horrible liar, and to think you’re the type to try and make me jealous,” he said, gingerly biting your ear and trailing his nibbling down your neck. But this time you needed to get away, what happened between you both was over, you just knew you could be of extra assistance to Itadori when it comes to Sukuna if things were to lose control and get worse than things already are. Rage begun to flow through your body. 
“Don’t you dare continue any further Sukuna, surely you must be joking to think your actions are okay.” You loathe this man, and everything about him. You hated that he was right and of course you would be lying to say you didn’t miss him. 
In these moments with Sukuna you have completely forgotten the physical effects that happened to your body when you were deeply into your emotions or in a rough battle, because on the outside, your body began turn a bluish black with stars scattered around, you began to look like a walking galaxy, and the men who were discussing you paused and just watched in amazement. 
“Ooo I love it when you're angry, now please are you going to use Orion's belt to tie me up like you used to when we were in bed together?” Sukuna chuckled, and now at this point you were fuming and about to bubble over. 
“That’s it, I’ll be on my way, I can’t be troubled to put more time into this, I’ll be back when you’re ready to be serious.” You said now storming off while Sukuna was calling after you. 
“Oh but dollface, the fun was just beginning!” but his words had no effect and you soon opened your eyes to your physical body, removing your hand from Itadoris head, your body now completely back to normal. 
“Thank you Itadori, Gojo, I’ll need somewhere to stay for the time being.” the men just nodded, absolutely dazed by what they just witnessed. 
“Why are you two staring at me?’ You asked shyly, but the only person to respond was Chinami. 
“Y/n, your body turned into a galaxy,” she said, now taking up residency back on your shoulder. 
“Oh what a nuisance, but Gojo, please offer some assistance for a room,” Gojo nodded at you and you two began to walk out. 
You turned to Itadori who was still sitting on his bed, staring at you as you walked away. 
“I will see you soon,” You winked and continued walking out of the room, closing the door behind you. But now you were left with so many questions. Like how are you bringing Sukuna back to your world? Surely you couldn’t do so until Itadori has consumed all of his fingers, which you found absolutely nauseating and surely something you should’ve gotten used to during your hundreds of years of existence but you still couldn’t. 
So what are you to do now? Well I guess you will just have to wait and see.
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