#there are just so many characters to flesh out and make stories with oops ^-^

[donuts4evry1]

i am suddenly struck by the urge to write a light novel

[jeffthekillerzblog]

a major plot point or like the entire thing about my au is just the creeps moving on and having their own character arcs throughout the years and finally heal from their past trauma

(rest is me rambling about my au...u don't have to read if u don't wanna its pretty long)

Jeff's arc is big on him finding his brother and coming to terms with what really happened. jeff is so incredibly stubborn and a big (very) egotistical. he finds it hard to open up and after what happened he feels that there's no point opening up anyway bc he's literally a famous asshole serial killer who's messed up SO many people's lives. another big thing about his arc is just owning up to his actions and apologizing to the people he's hurt. for example, nina. he led her on, treated her terribly for no reason, and was overall just an asshole. after they get into an argument he'll eventually apologize bc like he didn't HATE nina, he's was and prob still is in a terrible mindset and copes in such unhealthy ways. IDK OK I'm rambling but my point is he does eventually apologize to nina not because he needs her or like wants to use her again. he apologizes because he genuinely misses her and BOOM they become besties again after jeff properly apologizes and ya. BUT basically jeff's arc is him finally finding liu after all these years and yeah he apologizes to all the people he hurt (or the IMPORTANT ones) like nina, liu, and EVENTUALLY... jane. but that's WAY into the future (besides nina) he's way too full of himself to apologize now.

Nina's arc is her getting over JEFF. her love for Jeff began when she met him. she already admired him, but he turned into a full on crush. he did lead her on, and it hurt her a lot. shed spent tons of nights alone when jeff was supposed to be sleeping next to her, and she just felt so lonely, especially since jeff was so neglectful. She talks to clockwork about it and they help her realize her self worth and comforts her (she's terrible at it). Nina starts hanging out with Nat and toby more often, and it makes her feel SO much better about herself. Eventually she does get fed up of jeffs bs and they get into an argument and nina decides to leave. she kicks him out of her apartment and she doesn't let him come back. (she does....when he apologizes.....) She eventually learns to love herself and realize she doesn't need a stinky man's validation. Theres also a bit of her coming to terms with her own trauma, but I haven't fully fleshed that part out yet.

BEN's arc is probably my favorite. he's lost all his memories of his past life, and now after he accidentally found out he's NOT just a computer AI program, he decides to take it on himself to find out who his family was, how his life was, and how he died. I wont say as much bc I want to keep it a surprise, but in summary it fucks him up LMAO

ok that's it. OBVIOUSLY the rest of the creeps are healing as well BUT I have not fleshed out their stories yet...oops. so its just three for now. Except MUCH more stuff about the trio bc I love them with my all.. if u have any questions feel free to ask :3

[jesteriajunovix]

Battleborn Ramble Before Bed. (No I will not be taking responsibility or criticism for anything I say in this post its 12 AM).

Sometimes I just put on battleborn voice lines in the background while I do stuff. It makes me think about what could've been...... Oh Orendi. Your annoyingly high-pitched voice and deeply 2016 voice lines will forever be left to the past.

Honestly lets talk about it. What if I lived in a world where they fleshed out Orendi and she had more traction in what would be a heightened battleborn fandom. Like she was kind of swaggin. I mean I'm already coping as hard as ever so I'll just say I REALLY REALLY wish I could grow more investment in this character through story and fanart. Like ya there are many other characters that fit her archetype better in present day while delivering more as a character already, but I feel like the character of Orendi is a dead chicken kind of just constantly rotting out of the corner of my eye. Like her design is cool. Her voice lines a lil cringe, but could be tempered with time and more story. She already had some stuff goin on with the other characters that seemed pretty cool.

Like it annoys me how overwatch killed this game considering how uninteresting recent overwatch characters have looked comparably. Its like comparing a Cybertruck to a Beetle Car almost.

Gearbox (Or Arc Games or whatever) and Blizzard both pretty shitty as companies so I won't argue anything on that between the two really.

Just specifically with the characters I feel like the fucky experimentation of battleborn was way more out there and less afraid to pull weird, but interesting punches that have been lost in overwatch due to like a shitty higher-up in staff cannibalizing another coworker or something and needing to cover it up by dangling keys via the Diversity Point giving Robots (Bosses/Managers) ability to hover over artist and tell them to make the most milk toast designs ever seen in FPS history, but with representation built in.

Not that anything is wrong with representation. Its just that an actual artist's and the abacus-fiddling dinosaur moneymen that are thinking of how to lay off and ruin more peoples lives at the company have different Ideas of representation and how it should be approached. One has soul and the other doesn't put simply.

"Oops! my anarchy Symbol"

Another thing that is more personal than it is critical is the fact that like..

Overwatch Character: "I am bathed in the sun of Ra!!! Death be up-"

I don't care being real. Like I get it. You're a cool mighty person on the side of good or "the syndicate" or you're homeless or your mentally disturbed or other by some dumb sci-fi research experiment shit. None of their lines I think i really fuck with, because the most fun they really have with it is maybe just a little cheekyness or other. It feels soft serve and generic marvel shit.

Battle Born Character: "Ew you're fucking poor. Kill yourself you FREAK!!! Your brokenness might rub off on me."

Lowkey I might be on some "Thing, Thing Japan" type timing, but with overwatch and battleborn. I just honestly feel like theres more heart when Marquis kills you and tells you to get your fuckin money up you POOR lowly InsIgnIfIcant weirdO AliEn FREAKAZOID.

Also Battleborns gameplay was more fun. It just had a confusing upgrade system that was actually pretty cool.

To end this ramble lets look at some more characters I wish had the time to get fleshed out and gain fandom momentum.

I love this corny nigga bro. Reminds me of like that one corny black coach/gym teacher you had in high school, but is still like a cool dude.

Marquis. Nough Said. He's a Poor Hating Robot made of gold with a silly lil sniper & he talks shit to you in a hammed-up German accent.....Literally perfect. Grow up.

Literally the most fun gameplay and across the board just cool as shit. If I had one criticism I wish he flew a little looser in game.

Proper British Representation. Tracer could never. I've seen at least 100 British people who look and sound exactly like this.

A lil more generic voiceline wise, but I like her energy and twang. More butch than any overwatch character I've seen. Lost Soldier.

Last, but not least I just want you to know the 7 other people wallowing in the ashes of the battleborn "Fandom" do not condone the words and actions of Ultra kid. Sick Fuck. I'm sorry and all the families affected you have our deepest condolences. We'll get through this.

[mothmanssweetsucculentass]

Nurse Ann Headcanons

It’s MY blog and I get to pick which creepypasta goes next for my HC list!

No but seriously I feel like Ann has always been such an underrated character, it sucks the OG artist (Yaguyi I believe) never came up with a canon story for her.

Everything I list here is purely not canon, literally the only thing we have to go off canon-wise is that one image made years ago.

You know the drill, expect canon typical violence. Extra warning for mentions of SA, this is your only warning, stop reading NOW if things like that bother you

Is some form of zombie, however has full sentience and intelligence somehow

Zombies aren’t normally this coherent, like???

Died around the 90s

Was a nurse at a small hospital in New York before her death

Got into a car accident on her way to work one day

Assumed on the way to the ER of the hospital she worked in that she was in good hands

Oops! There’s a secret cult operating behind the scenes at the hospital!

The head surgeon was always a lecherous creep to the nurses. Took advantage of Ann’s injured unconscious state in multiple ways

Wasn’t sedated, was fully awake and felt everything as her body was dismembered, all in the name of [REDACTED] in the hospital basement

Her organs were harvested after she died from her injuries. Heartless physically and emotionally!

Her body was dumped up north in the woods

Botched sacrifice left her life clinging to each part of her body in a weird unconscious state

The pieces of her body were found by Jason. He planned to use her for spare parts in his craft, but some other force urged him to reconstruct her instead

Now the two are besties (mainly because Ann considers that she has a lifelong debt to Jason)

Obviously this whole experience fucked her up

Like bro my coworkers just murdered me in a ritual sacrifice and didn’t even do it correctly smh

Is fueled by spite and revenge

Has yet to track down every person at the hospital involved or complacent with the cult

But makes sure every time she finds one, they suffer a painful death the same way she did

Besides vengeance, she’s motivated to kill for her own body

No seriously she’s a walking corpse. She’s gotta find new body parts every so often, or consume flesh to revitalize the parts of her she can’t part with

Often replaces limbs, refuses to replace parts of her torso, or her head

Thanks to Jason teaching her, she’s insanely good at sewing and stitching

Her and Jason are the go-to pastas for whenever someone has a ripped shirt or something

Has an immense hatred for the medical system for many reasons besides what happened to her

Tries to be as gentle as possible with her patients, especially Sally

Gentle =/= BS tolerance tho

The amount of times she’s kicked Jeff out of her office because he was rude or made a pervy comment. If you’re gonna be a creep go tell your jokes to the big demon with no eyes and mouth tentacles

Keeps a secret stash of candy like a real doctors office and often hands them out randomly. Most of the time it isn’t even for good behavior during checkups, she just likes surprising people with random candy

Is often found betting on who gets hurt by what on a weekly basis with Eyeless Jack. Both of them agree that Jeff is off limits because he’s showing up to either of them constantly

Any body parts she doesn’t use or consume gets shared with Eyeless Jack and the other cannibals

Her hair isn’t naturally red, or even naturally there anymore. It’s a wig. Like bro she’s undead, have you seen the hair on corpses at funerals. There’s no way in hell she’s getting human hair to look that good for that long

But on the topic of wigs—weirdly one of the few pastas allowed to mingle with “normal” society

She’s insanely good at disguising herself

Owns many different wigs and outfits that strategically cover the rotting or stitched parts of her flesh from the public eye

Will moonlight as many different roles/jobs to gain access to needed supplies

Also helps gather local intel when Ben’s usual online intel isn’t enough

Secretly has befriended a few humans. Often goes out for coffee/book club with this very small group

Would probably be fully mentally broken if the others found out and went after her human friends

She loves being friends with Jason, Helen, and Eyeless Jack, but she knows for a fact that all 3 of them would see that as weakness and use it against her somehow

If Helen found out, he’d immediately use the information as leverage and blackmail against her

Jason would get insanely jealous. As per usual in his case. And would obviously go after the poor people

Eyeless Jack would straight up just eat them. I mean at least he’d offer to share with Ann, because he’d assume she was just “saving them for later” but eat them he would and he wouldn’t feel bad about it

She’s terrified of anyone finding out and often has a “do I even belong here?” Crisis

Up until she remembers why she’s there in the first place and immediately goes back to tracking down those involved in her death

Ben offered to help track these people down for her once, which was immediately turned down

It doesn’t feel the same if someone else did all the work like that. She has to be the one to find them and make them pay or it just doesn’t sit right with her

Is neutral about animals, but hates insects due to the fact they so frequently go after corpses. Bug traps and cans of various bug killers are scattered throughout her office to keep them at bay

Wears a fuckton of perfumes and bug repellants when out in human society to mask her rotting scent and to keep bugs off her skin

Is friends/close with: Eyeless Jack, Helen, Jason, Kagekao, Masky, and Hoody

Has a tolerable relationship with: Ben, LJ, Clockwork, Slenderman, Nina, Liu, and Sally

HATES/doesn’t get along with: Jeff, Jane, the Puppeteer

Jeff is pretty self explanatory

She doesn’t like Jane because Jane just rubs her the wrong way. She can’t explain why, but it feels like Jane is trying to be better than her for some reason

Puppeteer mistook her for one of Jason’s creations and assumed she was free to “play” with. Once he realized she was sentient and not, in fact, a corpse doll, he stopped, but she’s never forgiven him for that

Oh yeah if it wasn’t already obvious she holds hella grudges

If you don’t apologize within the microsecond of wronging her, your ass is on the burn list

Piss her off enough and she’ll remember specific details of things you did, and then list them off in front of other people until you do whatever she wants in that moment

If Helen is the king of manipulation then she’s the queen

You’d think her and Jason would be the gossip besties but it’s actually her and Helen fr

Is pretty close with Masky and Hoody since they’re the only other ones who are able to go out in human society often

She has no idea that they know about her human friends, but it’s fine considering they’re ones to talk

Her and Eyeless Jack share a bond of having unfortunate connections to [REDACTED]

Has made sure to carve off every part of her original body effected with the brandings/symbols of the cult

Often changes her eyes out for new fun ones. Does heterochromia for fun, and to irk Nina

“But you look like a Mary Sue when you do that!!” “But it looks cool” “BUT THE PRINCIPLE OF IT!!!!!”

When not tending to the injured masses, she’s often in the mansion’s library, or out in human society hanging out with her friends gathering supplies

[val-the-protoss-simp]

Part 1/3 the Tal'darim

Part 2/3 the Khalai <- you're here Part 3/3 the Nerazim

Part two of this ask, the Khalai

Erzadar. Formerly Erzolun (Because I have another Khalai OC named Talizun and I thought the names were way too similar) First concept was from 2022 (can be seen on the far bottom right of the art compilation) She was originally a tiny researcher from the Shelak tribe (??? I think??) Erza and her team of Khalai protoss were essentially Auir’s equivalent to Shakuras’s delegate team of Nerazim/terran diplomats/researchers/whatever.

She (and all the OCs from this story) were in kind of a limbo as they laid forgotten high on a metaphorical shelf of my mind, collecting dust, while I played with other OCs and stories. Until I was *this* video like half a year ago (no, it is not a Rickroll) and was like oh my god. oh. not to be a lesbian but oh my god. oh my fucking god Jesus Christ- we all know the meme.

Anyway, since then she became a tall, beefy adept.

She’s still mostly in development and therefore there’s not much to say about her. She’s a former zealot (became an adept during the events of LotV) With a friendly personality in a way only people in their early 20s have. She was assigned as a bodyguard/guide to the Dominion delegates Auir hosts and quickly becomes friends with most of them, namely Victor. And yes, I absolutely do plan to drag these two through months and years of delicious angst and yearning and denial and more angst before I allow them to become a thing. Their fault they’re my OCs.

Talizun is also a character who I’ve had for a looooooong time too (2018????? Before 2020) but I never really fleshed him out despite his key importance to the plot of Zhakul’s story. He didn’t even have a name until late 2021 ahaha oops. Most of his story was also conceived that year, meaning it’s pretty outdated and also prone to change in places, but I think it’s skeleton will remain.

Tali is a chill templar from a fringe Khalai colony so far away from the empire that it was entirely excluded from the great war that took place during the events of SC2. Him and many of his templar brethren were in stasis for centuries, only awakened AFTER the war was concluded, which is also the reason why he still bears his cords and is tethered to the Khala. (One of the big changes in this AU, aside from Shakuras not exploding and the Daelaam not being a thing anymore, is that the Khala prevails. This could be a separate yap session for later, I’m just making this clear now in case someone is confused over me mentioning it)

Anyway. He’s very chill and level-headed for a zealot, which actually came in handy because Zhakul needed to do some serious deconstructing of the bullshit Dal filled his head with and Tali was up for the job. The two end up bonding over a similar experience (being removed from protoss society for so long they feel like complete outsiders) become friends and eeeeeeeeeeventually form a Zhakul-centred polycule that also includes Jake and various other terrans and protoss.

Tali eventually gets himself killed in a border skirmish with the Tal’darim (originally it was Y’rash that yeeted him, now I’m not sure that’s canon anymore) he’s stuffed into the shell of a dragoon and does his best to continue with his life as well as he can, which is made much more complicated because he ends up having an oopsie baby (who we will also talk about later) and from then on struggles with the crushing feeling of knowing he can never be an adequate parent to them because his broken body must forever remain locked in a dragoon exoskeleton. 

The Talendir Orchard Head FamilyTM

The main characters in Project Sammuro. There’s very little to say about them for now because the story they were created for is at its infancy and therefore their characters are also very underdeveloped. They’re a down-to-earth family of protoss living in rural parts of Auir, growing and harvesting sammuro fruit for it’s rich blue dye, then distributing it across the Khalai empire as needed.

The story focuses on this entire process and also works as a lightbulb moment for Victor, who realises that the strongly capitalistic society of the Dominion is very very  flawed in comparison to the more traditional, socialistic economy the protoss have where culture, tradition and the well-being of it’s people are far more important to them than profit and power.

[sammyloomis]

2024 completions #1

part 2

back back back again!! gamers gamin'

06/12 update: posting this earlier than the new year because im gonna be rushed off my feet with work so i aint got time for gamin til late janurary :']

doing these is always fun and i know its mainly for myself fghj not sure many people even read these posts when i make em, but theyre fun to look back on!! in 2 parts cause i gamed too hard again smh smh

total games: 30

21/01 - Spider-Man 2 - 7/10

peter and miles return for double the spidey shit and double the big bads. why does anyone even live in this city anymore?? this sure was an insomniac spiderman game!!! like dont get me wrong, none of these games are Bad, theyre kinda middle of the road imo, but theyre still fun so ya cant fault em for that!! my main gripes with this game, as has been with the other 2, is just the overall story and dialogue being kinda boring. also, some of the side missions/collectibles stuff can be a bit of a pain BUT as i said, the combat is still very fun... tho mostly unchanged aside from some new abilities n gadgets

08/02 - Cozy Grove - 8/10

you are a spirit scout who has washed ashore of what seems to be a deserted island. except OOPS wait its not deserted, its haunted, and its YOUR job to help out the wayward souls stuck here into the afterlife if youre looking for a console version of animal crossing this is ur best bet imo!! tons of collectibles to find over the seasons, a bunch of decorations to spruce up the island, and a surprisingly rich story for each character u meet. this game covers some pretty heavy topics for how bright and cozy it looks, it was a pleasant surprise. my main gripes are how repetitive the quests are and how buggy it is; the game freezes a LOT and u have to restart the whole app multiple times just to get going some days. other than that, very fun and relaxing :]

22/02 - Frog Detective: The Entire Mystery - 10/10

you are frog detective, worlds number 2 best detective!! head off on 3 exciting cases and solve the Ultimate mystery - IS there a hat that can fit on frog detectives weird shaped head?? only time will tell im being dead serious about the 10/10 btw. this game is a collection of all 3 games in the series and theyre all super short, but super fun and cute and Funny. like genuinely. i love the low poly art style so much, i think the jokes are great, just the overall vibes are Brilliant, rly cant rec this enough :']

22/02 - Fran Bow - 8/10

fran bow follows the story of a young girl struggling with strange visions and evil entities i mean fran bow is a pretty iconic point n click horror game, idk what else to say abt it that hasnt been said already!! the art style is obviously a highlight, and the writing is iffy in some cases but surprisingly emotional a lot of the time for how messed up the visuals can get. theres a Lot of back and forth which can get a bit tedious, but the puzzles are pretty fun and overall its just a decent game imo

01/03 - Little Misfortune - 6/10

a young girl called misfortune goes on an adventure to find Eternal Happiness after a strange voice begins speaking to her inside her head the spiritual sequel to fran bow!! the vibes are similar for sure but something about this one didnt grab me the same as its predecessor. the character of misfortune can oscillate frequently between cute and annoying for me, as could the voice acting, but theres clearly a lot of heart in this one still :] the world didnt feel As fleshed out as fran bows but still a decent game

07/03 - Castle on the Coast - 7/10

you are a giraffe named george, washed ashore on an island with a castle (on the coast, if you can believe it). after meeting the residents, you gotta platform and collect ur way to the very top to help resolve some bad blood pretty cute n short platformer!! controls are kinda floaty/slippy and its very clearly meant for a younger audience, but its still pretty fun :] low poly art style is always a plus for me and i do always love a good platformer

09/03 - Yu-Gi-Oh! Master Duel - 9/10

the card game as you know and love it, now digital! i mean. its yugioh fghj if ur a new player its a great way to learn the basics and begin crafting some decks of ur own, if ur a returning player its a fun way to experiment with some new deck ideas and just play, and if u dont wanna play against other people online u can always just take it to a private match and duel there with ur friends :] the ui is sleek, yugioh itself is a fun game. honestly the only bad thing is the other players but u cant do much about that fghjk

15/03 - Yu-Gi-Oh! Legacy of the Duelist: Link Evolutions - 6/10

a single player yugioh game where you can duel through iconic scenes from the og anime and beyond kind of the unrefined, solo play version of master duel. its not as good imo, and master duel brought a lot of quality of life upgrades from this one, but if ur after a decent single player yugioh game this ones ur bag :'] this version has 6 different animes to chose from and u can play thru all of them, build ur own decks, etc etc. theres also an online mode but its pretty dead and if u wanna duel real people u might as well just use master duel

19/03 - Chasing Static - 5/10

having just buried his father, chris pulls over to a late night cafe after getting lost in the welsh countryside. while exploring the area, he finds a mysterious bunker and a voice over the radio pretty 'meh' horror game but i rly like the ps1 style graphics, always a plus for me. the actual plot and gameplay is fine, nothing too special, and its Extremely short, but not much else to say :']

20/03 - Steven Universe: Unleash the Light - 8/10

more gems are determined to disturb the peace of era 3 and its once again up to steven and the crystal gems to stop them another steven universe rpg!! apparently this is the 3rd in the trilogy, but the first one was never ported to ps so ive only ever played this one and 2 fghj BUT honestly?? these are rly good rpgs; the art style is gorgeous, the gameplay is fun, obviously the characters are cute too. its just a blast :] the Big Gripe is that its glitchy as hell fghjk you can get stuck in certain areas and be unable to move unless u exit the game, but i still highly recommend for su and rpg fans alike

28/03 - The Addams Family: Mansion Mayhem - 3/10

when a seedy businessman shows up on their doorstep looking to buy and demolish their house, the addams family have to scour the place of artefacts to prove their homes importance .....i mean. its. fine. its ur standard 3d platformer fare, nothing to write home about really. its one of those overpriced ip games that dont take long to beat at All. i only got it for the meme and cause it was on sale and like i say, not bad, but its just kinda meh. the "story" is boring and feels not very addams-y but at this point thats par for the fkn course for anything with their names on it fghj

31/03 - First Class Trouble - 1/10

its a shitty among us clone, and thats all i have to say about this mess this thing has been on my backlog for 2 years and i NEVER. thought id every finish it because its Literally just among us but not fun. all the trophies are online only and specific as Fuck. the only reason i did it is cause i unlocked One (1) trophy when it was free on ps plus with my mates and it was bugging the fuck outta me. so yuh. dont play fghj. p sure the servers are gonna die soon too

07/04 - Burnout Paradise: Remastered - 7/10

burnout paradise has you getting behind the wheel in one of the best racing/stunting/crashing games in the world. try not to wreck your car Too bad MAN. this bad boys been on my backlog for 3 years, holy shit. i bought it because i was nostalgic and i remember playing the original with my brother all the time, so it was defo an experience to go back :'] while it is a very fun game as a whole, it gets repetitive pretty quickly, even with all the new cars you unlock, and some of the online trophies can be a pain to get (2 specifically involving full lobbies) BUT cant deny its an entertaining time

27/04 - LEGO DC Super-Villains - 7/10

the justice league have gone missing and a new band of "heroes" have swept in to take their place. our titualar super villains arent too pleased about this standard lego game fare :'] if i had to pick, im certainly more of a dc fan simply for harley, and lego games are always fun collectathon type deals, so this wasnt half bad!! lego games humour is always a lil hit or miss, but these things are always aimed at younger audiences anyway so eh what can ya do

04/05 - Overwatch 2 - 5/10

one of the most famous fps shooter games out there, do i rly need to explain overwatch to you?? no your eyes do NOT deceive you, i did in fact 100% overwatch 2. not Completely on my own merit, i had the help of a boosting group, but still!!!! twas a journey :'] i never played overwatch in its heyday so i cant speak to how it Used to be, but from what ive played now its just... not rly for me. i like the characters a bunch, and the world/story building is interesting, but thats not rly the focus of the game itself tho i wish it was

07/05 - Control - 9/10

jesse faden inadvertently becomes the new director of the federal bureau of control aftering finding the previous one dead seemingly from a self inflicted gunshot. overtaken by entities called the Hiss, jesse fights to reclaim the Oldest House, while also searching for her long lost brother WHEW!! love this one holy SHIT. big big BIG scp vibes, the way this game handles its horror and aesthetic is brilliant and exactly my cup of tea. tbh i found the actual gameplay the least interesting part fghj i would've spent the whole time going around collecting files and reports just to read them if i could :'] that being said, combat and traversal feel Awesome, every new ability is so fun to use. great stuff!!

10/05 - Carrion - 9/10

you are an unholy, fleshy, offal abomination, free from ur confines within a secret underground facility. time to escape. and kill everyone on the way out :] honestly ive been wanting to play this for ages so im glad i finally could! just as fun as i expected, visually amazing i Love the pixel art style paired with this rly disgusting Thing ur controlling dfghj its incredibly satisfying to just grab people up and start ripping them to shreds. u unlock new abilities as u progress and encounter stronger enemies as u go, but the feeling of being some unstoppable force never rly goes away (positive). p short game, but very fun!!

13/05 - Coffee Talk 2: Hibiscus & Butterfly - 7/10

coffee talk 2 takes place a while after the first game, introducing a couple of new faces and reconnecting with old ones this games just p pleasant to play :'] like the first one, its a kind of a barrista/visual novel type deal where people come in and u make them drinks/listen to their stories/etc etc. the musics lovely, the arts p nice, but like the first one i feel like its all a bit surface level. i never Really feel like i connect with any of these characters, even the returning ones, but its still a pretty game and theres not much else to say about it fghj

18/05 - A Way Out - 5/10

two guys, brought together by a mutual goal, escape prison and begin a journey to exact revenge on the man who ruined their lives tbh i didnt actually finish this game since the plat pops Wayyy before the end and i already knew how it ended so... yeah fghj i only played this for a platinum bingo event im doing rn and needed a co-op game to do so here we are :'] that being said, its an interesting story with interesting mechanics!! defo fun to play with a friend if ur looking for a short impactful story to get thru together

23/05 - NORCO - 10/10

kay, finally coming home after her mother passes away from cancer, learns that she had been doing some investigating in the nearby swamps and begins trying to figure out what she was looking for a sci-fi southern gothic point-n-click game that BLEWWW me away dude. holy shit this story is so SO good, i loved every second of it. its such an interesting setting with worldbuilding to match, gorgeous art, haunting soundtrack AUGH cannot recommend this one enough

01/06 - Heavy Rain - 2/10

the origami killer kidnaps ethan mars' remaining son and he must go on a set of trials to get him back. and other stuff happens too i guess. bad. its just bad dfgh. lets try to start with a positive tho; the actual concept is pretty cool and the mystery/crime stuff is alright, but the writing and characters are fkn boring and annoying and gross. i hated ethan as a main character, i thought he was so annoying, the plot twist makes no sense, and all the female characters are so clearly written by a man who hates women. yuck.

01/07 - Pesterquest - 10/10

you're a lean, mean, friend making machine and the ceasless call of platonic relations beckons you even now!!! time to befriend some regular degular teens (and aliens) okay so HUGE preface on this game you kinda.... Have to have read homestuck to understand literally any of it. im a homestuck fan, and ive never read the epiloges or the "sequel" and even I was lost on some points, but REGARDLESS i fkn loved this so much. its just ur run-of-the-mill visual novel, but i genuinly had such a fun time revisiting these characters and seeing them again that i dont even care dfghj and great art too!!

04/07 - Hiveswap Friendsim - 7/10

you have just crash landed on a strange alien planet. your bones are broken, you're lost and alone, you're hungry and thirsty. only one thing can save you now... FRIENDSHIP!!!! so i think i was supposed to play this one before pesterquest dfghj but i got too excited to see characters i already knew again :'] ANYWAY this game acts as a little introduction to some characters you can meet in the ill-fated homestuck point and click adventure game, hiveswap. while i didnt find this one as engaging as pesterquest, it was still an interesting insight into alternian life!! which im all about. i doubt it ever will, but i wonder if they'll ever port hiveswap to console... a man can dream

09/07 - Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney Trilogy - 5/10

apollo justice, an up-and-coming defence attorney, begins his journey at the wright anything agency so i wanna start with a good thing off the bat because my opinion of this collection kinda plummeted towards the end. i rly like the 3d models, i think they capture the same level of character that the og 2d ones did and add new dimensions to everyone. everything else tho... hh idk man, i just rly didnt vibe with these at all, which sucks. i feel like it was just ret con after ret con after character assassination. big L tbh

23/07 - Grotto - 8/10

in the middle of the woods, in the heart of a mountain, lives a soothsayer. a startamer. using the constellations, you must provide the people who visit you with answers to their most pressing questions the art style of this game kinda drew me in, and the story ended up surprising me with how dark and interesting it is!! you end up making a lot of descisions that seem to have no good options, or giving people an answer that they end up misinterpreting for the worse due to ur limited options. for playing such a limited perspective, you get such a clear, vivid picture of whats happening outside your little cave. really interesting stuff

27/07 - Broken Age - 8/10

vella and shay are two teenagers with seemingly totally unrelated lives. they long for change, for freedom, and to do that they must break the traditions forced onto them from birth a point-n-click adventure with a surprisingly star studded cast!! and i didnt even know this was made by the same people who made psychonauts until i started it up :'] which means the art and humour were brilliant! honestly super fun, engaging characters and fun puzzles, and the way these two finally converge was honestly so brilliantly done, i did Not expect it at all

31/07 - Horizon Zero Dawn - 9/10

aloy grew up an outcast her whole life and its only when her past comes knocking does she finally begin to get some answers to her life long questions. also theres a bunch of huge killer robots :] this ones been on my backlog for so damn long, im so happy i finally got around to finishing it!! the combat in this is so addicting, i played it for like a week straight going for all the side quests n upgrades n such. the story was fkn brilliant, i feel like it balanced the the sci-fi elements really well with all the more fantasy stuff, and theres even some horror aspects that i really enjoyed!! im docking a point for glinthawks tho. FUCK glinthawks.

06/08 - Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective - 8/10

a man wakes up in a junkyard about to watch a woman get shot by an assassin. he has to help her but theres only one problem: hes dead. using his new ghostly powers, "sissel" must discover the truth behind his death and the strange events taking place tonight, before he disappears forever a game that id been super excited to play for how much it was hyped up by literally everyone i mentioned it to :'] the mechanics are simple but super satisfying, very rube goldberg machine, and the story is a tantalising mystery that unfolds at a great pace with plot twists and reveals happening at just the right moments to keep you engaged

10/08 - Cat Quest 3 - 9/10

the third installment of the cat quest rpg games takes on the open ocean, as our main lil cat buddy and their ghostly guide search the purribean for the north star treasure!! listen, i fkn Loveeeee the cat quest games and i recommend them to anyone who will listen and i mean that from the bottom of my heart. this one continues the trend of fun combat, an excessive amount of cat puns, and a surprisingly in-depth story that carried over from previous games. my big gripe is that this game is short as hell and it feels like even outside the story, there isnt as much to do as there is in the past games. still incredibly fun :]

27/11 - Bioshock: Remastered - 7/10

after your plane crashes in the middle of the ocean, you wind up in an underwater city called rapture where things seem to have gone completely tits up the gamer is back after 3 months with a game almost 4 years in the making on my backlog :'] not sure if this'll be the last game i have the time to complete this year but hopefully i got time for one more at least!! so theres a reason it took me so long to finish this one, its just cause it never rly clicked with me :[ which sucks cause its a rly cool premise with a ooky spooky atmosphere which is totally my vibe. ive been adamant i wouldnt play the rest (mainly because i thought the remasters would have the online trophies but, to my surprise, they dont) so time will tell if i keep on goin with this series

[polarized-here]

POLAR I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR OCS AND SEE THEIR CONCEPT ART‼️ please I need food, I need to eat your art sjdhhsjdhsj /lh

GRAHH FINE SINCE YOU ASKED… my lore. Sorry this is so late gngahgahshsjsh… you literally caught me as dinner came home. Like. Oops… crazy… right after I knocked out shekhrkdbddmbd anyway! :)

Under the cut because it may or may not be a long thing, with most plot points just being little ideas—no fully fleshed story, just, erm. Ideas I like.

Update. It’s long. Also tumblr is so glitchy rn it kept making this saved post disappear and then reappear in my asks after I exited the app and opened it again what the fuck 😭😭

So, in this world, a majority of the population do. Not. Have powers, having them is seen as a blessing, But… It's a dystopian themed world—where these powers are incredibly monitored and regulated by the government—with some being minor, and some being full on changes to the physical body and how they manifest. (ie. My excuse for drawing anthros… or kemonomimi… shushhhh/also allows me to just dump all of my ocs which you may have seen before, in one little world and play with them like they’re my puppets :( I love them sm!! One of them sora is from DND they hold a special place in my heart...)

But again, having these powers is seen as a blessing from a God of some sort—and a curse, as while they’re regulated by the national government heavily, some individuals still manage to slip by, or cause harm to the general public, so from this, they (the gov) took advantage of this to instill a system of ‘heroes’ and ‘villains’ there’s a few ‘vigilantes’ but most either become heroes (through turning themselves in and doing plenty of community service work, and discussing a contract with some government representatives—most who become heroes are never the same. They always have a look in their eyes, as if valor to help their nation has blinded them), but some may become villains.

Heroes are those who just have a license and have signed a contract with the government—most get these contracts renewed or take a small few month break in between contract renewals. They’re unable to use their powers in these circumstances, unless it’s out of self defense. Civilians can too (those not heroes, are regulated by the government heavily, and choose not to pursue it. But it’s like US NAVAL contracts too. you can join programs in the gov that give you supplemental access and benefits to college/pay it off, etc etc etc. like the national guard but more celebritized), but they (civilians) need to find a GOOD lawyer. There’s so many laws that heroes are naturally given a smalllllll pass over, that it’s just best to run away, or be a hero in that small instance.

(This has sm mha influence. As sad as it is, that show influenced me sm. Got me into trying art. Fr fr/on digital. PLA is just where it improved a weeee bit).

OKAYYY ENOUGH AGOUT THE SET UP!! THE CHARACTERS… I’m so sorry idk why I’m rambling this much, I’m not even hyperfixated on my own OCs. Like what the fuck.

Anyways! A key note is that having bright colored hair is a key identification that you probably have powers that haven’t manifested yet, and the hair is always a bright color, unless, you’re Astor!

He’s got so much trauma *slaps roof of car.* You can fit so much trauma in this one bad boy. And despite it all he remains a good person. Dawg. You have more strength then I’d ever have. But igggg the want and need to help people because you were hurt and want to make a change does seem motivation enough… anyways. They’re so marysue coreee

The main character & a small-time vigilante going to the new school that’s just been set up. His hair only really turns those bright colors when she’s using their powers—but in the ref it’s just for convenience sake. She has so many skeletons in her closet, that they can’t risk being caught. But they love helping people too much. They’re a bit altruistic.

Here’s their vigilante suit ref :)

For ease of mind, they always have a small bit of static on their hands—both to stun new people meeting them. To make the air feel charged with thunder and electricity—a warning to her presence, and because it means their hair stays that color. No matter the charge. His eyes stay the same color though. Again. These are some old doodles from last year of some characters. Notably, that I also revamped. Heroes, villains, and vigilantes stories always hold a special place in my heart,,,

Next up is Anzu! Silly goober!!! Please give him head pats!!!! He loves it!!! This is Astor’s only… real friend. Since Astor likes his solitude. But tolerates Anzu’s silly behavior. Utter dichotomy between them!!! <333 I haven’t decided if they’d get together or nah, but! <3333

Yeah, this guy (and Astor) both have autism (I didn’t even realize that him liking trains was an autistic stereotype… oops. Mb gang. But like. Seriously. Ywah didn’t mean anything by it. I’m autistic myself and I’m possibly pursuing physics or engineering 💪💪 I think it’s alr if I project onto a character I made 🔥🔥🙏)

Yes, he’s based on the irl dinosaur. Yes, he’s autistic, hear me out. I just put lots of things together. And he just ended up with major tism 🔥🙏

And finally, a hero I designed :) I changed her a weeee bit. But she’s mostly the same sand manipulation :) villains dislike her since she puts sand in their shoes. Her big container is full of sand and stuff. She doesn’t have a weakness other then she needs to be a bit concentrated on making her sand creations—but they’re like second nature to her because of how long she’s been a hero. She’s an antagonist only because she’s trying to take Nexus in. She sees how sweet she can be to the native cats (from a distance. Never touching them, and she never knows why, they look at the native cats, longing to pet them but always stops) so she wants to take him in and make a case for him to join the government’s hero program.

Arizona! But her hero name is Sahara yk… Yeagh…. Anyways :) I love her lots. She does mean well. But she’s also blindly faithful in the government, or will see its problems and will deflect or try to be better to make things right. But she always holds rules above anything else. Even if she cares about someone who’s breaking them, a lot, so yeah… totally not talking about the mentor and mentee relationship between her and Nexus… where she pushes her morals aside just to listen to him seldom talk about his intrepid interests.

If Nexus didn’t have those powers—in her opinion—she would’ve made an excellent leader in whatever field he’d want to pursue. And she knows he’s got something up with them—some history. And that breaks her heart a little seeing how much pure joy Nexus gets at being able to try new things, like new foods, or try out purely common things that should be normal to a kid like herself.

Very much love found families and going to the extreme for them :33

ANYWAYS!!! Those are the main 3. I have some others I’ll show. But yk. They look a wee bit different + have names labeling them and the key parts of them. I don’t think tumblr would like me dropping all their refs :,)

Actually :O hold on, their refs are here. Trust

I’m so smart for pasting them all here. Trust anyways. Those are my pookies, so sorry this took so long.. erm I like them a lot. Oh yeah, I made a comic with them for art class. Yeagh. They were mostly changed for ease of drawing but yeah. I did not want to do it but I had not wanted to do this 🚬🚬

But yeah, pookies…. Sorry you probably didn’t want this comprehensive lore about them grrr

[shooks-stupid-stuff]

Shook's Weekly OCs: #014

Oops, mean to to post this earlier this week too but I had a bunch of stuff to finish for the TTRPG me and my irl friends are doing so- I have just finally gotten to it cjhbvcjv-

But holdups aside, welcome to the first (of a couple) Shook OC that is based off of a figure from Japanese legends; with Shūten being based off of, well. Shuten-dōji, the name kinda makes it obvious huh cjvbcjv-

Funnily enough, the idea for her actually came from my good friend pika (@nubcatnoises), who was making a funny girl gang based off of the three great evil yokai and let me slide in and take the oni because of course I would do that, I love making funny oni :] Which like. After doing my research I have Thoughts on the story of Shuten-dōji, many of which are 'man I love when gifted kids are vilified' but I won't get into that here jchvbcv this is funny OC time not 'shook tells you why this widely considered evil character was right actually' hour lol

Anyways, facts:

Her actual name isn't Shūten, that was just an affectionate nickname her caretaker gave her that she decided to use as her name after she swore off using her real one.

She ran away from home at a young age for various reasons, and has a very sour view of humanity as a result. That isn't to say she doesn't like anybody though; she really cares about her fellow gang members and her girlfriend (who yes, is based off of Ibaraki-dōji. More on her at some point)

She isn't actually an oni, but is still quite strong and can outdrink most people (she is of legal drinking age ofc, girl is like 25). (Also, small design note: Even though she doesn't have them since she's human, I drew her bangs as if she had horns :] )

Her eyes actually slightly change color depending on her mood, getting darker if she's angry or lighter if she's depressed. Her pupils will also turn bright yellow when she's pissed.

The tattoo she has on her arm is of a traditional oni mask surrounded by red poppies.

She likes to lightheartedly tease those she's close to, though she always is sure to stop if it seems like they're not taking it as a joke like she intends.

I wish I had more to say, but as she's a fairly new OC I haven't had much time to flesh her out yet. But even so, man I love how her design turned out, she's so cool...

Hoping to get back on track with these and finish the three WIP ones I have this coming week! It may be hard since I also have birthday art + gameshow stuff + a comm to do but. I will try lol-

[sawcondeez]

what are two of your favorite movies from the Saw Franchise?

what are three of your favorite traps ?

thank you!!

Fav Saw Movies!

my fav Saw movie will always be Saw (2004)! there’s just a charm to it, the grungy-ness, the fleshed out characters, the colour grading is unmatched, the premise of it is simple yet so interesting. I love a contained story! AND I LOVE ADAM !!! and most importantly you can tell through and through that it is a passion project for Leigh Whannell and James Wan. listening to the commentary and behind the scenes gives me so much joy. I love that Cary Elwes signed onto the project because he had so much faith in them and their work and I love just how much fun they had making it despite being on such a tight schedule and budget and it ended up making such an impact in the horror industry! I could go on but I’m gonna stop there lol

my second favourite would have to be either Saw III or Saw VI. for Saw III, I love that it’s kind of like a character study/character building I guess? I love having more of an insight to Amanda, I think she’s such an interesting and complex character, the whole father-daughter dynamic between her and John as well, I find very compelling. the themes about forgiveness, revenge, family, grief as well wheeeew. It’s Leigh’s last Saw film as a writer and even though they keep the franchise going after III, I think he ties everything up very well as his last entry in the franchise.

Saw VI ouuuuuu I really like how it’s a commentary on the American health system, I think it’s done pretty well. the traps allegorically worked better than I think a lot of the other traps in the franchise do. William Easton was also an interesting focus as the main test subject, and I liked watching him going through the various traps and having the whole inner battle about morality and mortality. I also love the scene when Hoffman gets put in the Reverse Bear Trap!!

Fav Saw Traps!

I think it’s harder for me to pick my favourite traps though. like I love the Reverse Bear Trap because it’s so iconic, the concept is not too complex yet it’s so horrifying and ingenious, but I don’t like the aspect of having to kill a defenceless person in order to “win”(many such cases tho). and it irks me in the tape when John says “it’s in the stomach of your DEAD cell mate…. know that I’m not lying” BUT HE IS LYING ‼️

visually I really liked the Angel Trap, it’s just so gnarly yet beautiful. something about the Venus Fly Trap visually I liked a lot too.

The Ice Block Trap in Saw IV, I feel, needed more screen time/care. I feel like the concept of it could’ve made for a very captivating watch - I think someone mentioned it paralleled Saw (2004) in the way that there was the real Jigsaw in the room (Hoffman) which the other victims were unaware of, there was the victim who was acting like a perpetrator (Art Blank) but was actually doing so as part of his own test. and the pathetic whimpering blonde guy (hehe). could’ve also used more of Donnie Wahlberg’s acting skills, I think he’s great!

*edit: omg I forgot about shotgun carousel, thought I wrote about it when talking about Saw VI but I guess not oops. the allegory of the dogpit having to deny 2/3 of all applicants thus sentencing them to death, and William Easton having to do the same with the dogpit. he’s forced to use his algorithm on his own team, the symbolism about the blood on his hands, wheeew.

anyway thank you for asking!! excuse the rambling but it was nice to get this out

:D

[harrington-love]

All The Little Moments (That Brought Me Back To You)

Summary: A piece in which Nancy Wheeler falls back in love with Steve Harrington

Notes:

My first ever (completed) Steve Harrington x Nancy Wheeler piece. Of course, this is dedicated to my wonderful discord pals who have become my own found family. This wouldn't have been possible without their love, encouragement, and support. This story focuses more on Nancy's perspective, thoughts, and feelings in her season four scenes with Steve, with a few of my own made up events that follow the very last episode. As for the actual canon events and dialogue that happened in season four, I do NOT claim those as my own. I also do NOT claim the characters as my own. All the credit, rightfully so, goes to the writers of this fantastic show. This is just a retelling :) This story is for a mature audience, so if you are not 18 years or older, please do NOT read this piece. Lastly, this story also features a bit of Jonathan x Nancy for narrative purposes, but if you're looking for a happy ending for them, you won't find it here. (Most likely you won't find it in the show either. Oops. #TeamStancy)

WC: 10,303

Divider: @saradika (Check out all of their beautiful headers and dividers!!)

Nancy doesn’t even know how it happened.

One moment, in the dark and quiet of the night on a boat at Lovers’ Lake, eyes twinkling and a faint pink dusting her cheeks, she’d whispered a heartfelt “Be careful” to the boy who, if she was being honest, wasn’t a boy anymore.

Steve.

He was a man, a beautiful man who had taken her by surprise over the last few days they found themselves together. She was amazed at how easily they were able to fall back into laughter, how effortlessly a smile stretched across her lips at one of his corny jokes that she’d heard a million times, but always made her laugh as though she was hearing it for the first.

There was something else though, that accompanied this feeling of amazement. Something deep and warm and fond, that’d been present as she plucked spiderwebs from his perfectly styled hair. She felt it when he had offered…no, insisted on joining her at the library. It was present in her urgency as she leapt from the boat into the deep depth of the water to find him, to save him, just like he’d done for her so many times before.

The next moment, she’s protecting him with a boat oar from interdimensional bats with razor sharp teeth that gnaw at his bloodied flesh. The force behind her swing is enough to kill them, making them pay for causing harm to the man that’s spent his teenage years protecting others from it.

She inspects his wounds when he stands, fingers gently grazing the marks on his arm and shoulder. He makes a joke that he’s never been better despite having a pound of flesh torn off his body, and instead of scolding him for his inability to be serious for one moment, she lets herself breathe. And maybe even smile.

Hiding in the shadows of the Upside Down’s version of Skull Rock is when Nancy is overcome with a whole different feeling entirely. It’s not a new feeling, however. She felt it in the Hawkins High girl’s bathroom sophomore year, back pressed against the tiled wall as Steve’s lips nipped and licked and kissed at her neck. It was there in the dim light of her bedroom when he’d kissed her slowly with wandering hands. And again in the darkness of Steve’s room, naked and vulnerable, tangled between his bedsheets.

She watches Steve stumble, dizzy and weak from blood loss, and urges him to his knees. With no other option, she kneels in front of him, close enough to feel his breath on her cheeks. The bat bite isn’t infected as far as Nancy can tell, but the wound is completely exposed and she won’t risk him being subjected to more pain.

She rips the bottom part of her sweater clean off. Her eyes ask permission, fabric held between nimble fingers. He grunts his consent, hands cradling the back of his head as the sweater piece grazes the sticky wound. She wants to make sure it’s secure, tying the fabric around his lower back, faltering slightly when the sound that leaves his lips mirrors a noise she’s heard before. He’s in pain, she knows this, but he’s a whimpering mess in front of her and past memories of her hands and tongue exploring his body are at the forefront of her mind.

Nancy makes the mistake of glancing up at his face. Half lidded eyes burn with something dark, and Nancy knows it can only be described as lust because she’s looking at him the same way he’s looking at her. He’s breathing deeply, pink lips parted, and for a moment Nancy thinks what if…

And then a few seconds later the ground shakes and Steve’s pulling her body into his chest, arm a snug shield around her collarbones. Her fingernails dig into his skin and if it hurts he doesn’t say anything, his steady breath next to her ear the only noise she hears. It’s a comforting sound, one that signifies he’s alive, and when the ground stops shaking she holds onto him for just a split second longer. Steve doesn’t mind one bit.

Eddie asks questions about the Upside Down and sometime after he receives his answers, Robin suggests finding grenades and guns to fend off the creatures. Eddie’s brows furrow, disbelief in his voice at the admission that Nancy Wheeler, out of all people, keeps guns locked away in her bedroom. There’s a husky voice behind her that says “You almost shot me with that one,” when she mentions owning a revolver.

Her head tilts slightly, a snicker on her face as she recalls the first time Steve was ever introduced to anything pertaining to the Upside Down. With a bloodied eye and a bruised ego, he’d come to the Byers’ house to apologize to Jonathan, only to force his way inside after one glance at her bandaged hand. He refused to leave until he knew she was okay, but he wasn’t moving quick enough for her and the lights had started to flicker. She couldn’t risk him being involved in the mess. Gun aimed at his chest, she’d said, “I’m doing this for you.”

Nancy chuckles now, a light and airy huff. So much has changed since then, including the two of them. “You almost deserved it,” is her answer, a coy smile on her lips as she gazes back at him. They don’t say anything afterward, basking in the silence and in the heat of each other’s closeness.

The moment is ruined by a denim vest being thrown in Steve’s direction. She and Steve blink, startled, and Eddie mentions something about modesty. Fuck modesty, she thinks.

Steve puts the vest on, much to Nancy’s dismay, but then her eyes trail over his form and she decides he looks good in it. Even if he is battered and bruised, he’s still just as handsome as he was back in high school. Maybe even more now.

And while she watches him flick on the flashlight and lead the way through the forest, she can’t help but be impressed by how much he’s matured over the years. She’s used to taking charge, being the one people follow, that the feeling of letting someone else lead is almost unfathomable.

And yet Nancy finds herself letting Steve guide the way, any and all complaints dying on her tongue. He’s walking into a strange and frightening world with determined eyes, a set jaw, and a confidence she isn’t used to. There’s no protest on his lips or hesitation in the way that he moves, a stark difference to his seventeen year old self. She’s enticed by this version of Steve, the one that sees danger and runs toward it, not from it. The one that has so naturally fallen into the role of a leader, someone that Nancy can trust to keep her safe.

She can’t help the smile that spreads across her cheeks as she follows him into the unknown.

They’d been able to make contact with Lucas, Dustin, and Erica, and eventually found their way to Eddie’s trailer. It was there they discovered a gate that would lead them back to Hawkins. All they had to do was climb through. Easy enough.

Robin and Eddie had made it up the rope smoothly, landing comfortably on a mattress waiting for them on the other side. Nancy is halfway up the rope, ready to emerge on the other side of the portal, when something in the air shifts and suddenly she’s falling, her back eventually colliding with hard ground. Her eyes open to the horrific sight of a dead Barbara Holland cocooned in tentacles at the bottom of Steve’s empty pool.

Visions of that night replay on a loop. Some are of Barb’s pained screams as she was brutally taken from the world. Others are of herself and Steve, bodies pressed against each other, soft moans filling the quiet of his room and tongues licking into mouths. “You’re so beautiful,” he’d said, right as his hips pressed flush with hers. She’d felt all of him that night, a moment that was sweet and pure, or should have been, overshadowed by unresolved guilt.

Nancy doesn’t like to cry if she can help it, but she sheds tears for her best friend who was taken much too soon. She cries for the girl she used to be before being introduced to a world of horrors, and the childhood innocence that was taken from her all in one night that she’d given into passion.

The rest of Vecna’s visions are just as awful as the next, and Nancy can’t bear to think of a world where Hawkins is destroyed and taken over by monsters. A world where her mom, Holly, and Mike, don’t survive. A world where her friends are beaten down, traumatized, and irreparably broken.

The world that Vecna shows her is Hawkins’ reality in a few days' time, and Nancy’s not sure if he’ll even let her live long enough to see the city crumble. But he sends her off with a message for Eleven, and when the visions subside, her body falls limp. She’s too weak from the crying and the yelling and the pleading to catch herself as she collapses.

But Steve does. Of course he does. He’s gentle when he maneuvers her onto the ground, head on his arm with his hand cradling her cheek, thumb rubbing at stray tears on her lashes. Her breaths are slight gasps and she’s riddled with fear, unable to hear anything over the sound of her own panic.

“It’s okay, I’m here. I’m right here.”

The words aren’t just comforting, they’re a promise. Her eyes don’t leave him when he says it, assuring her over and over that he’s here with her and he isn’t going anywhere. She focuses on mimicking his steady breathing, the concern in his hazel eyes lighting a fire in her chest. Safe, sound, and supported in Steve’s arms is when she comes to realize that he never stopped caring about her.

The plan for defeating Vecna includes a trip to the War Zone for as much ammunition as they can take without becoming suspicious. Eddie surprises everyone by hot wiring a caravan for the adventure, and Steve shocks the gang by driving it quite well under pressure.

Nancy takes the seat beside him, enjoying the comfortable silence before asking, “How does it handle?” He jokes with a smile, “Pretty well for a house.”

She doesn’t feel pressured to keep up the conversation. Silence is never awkward around Steve. But she watches as his mouth bobs open slightly and turns in her seat, full attention on him. He almost looks sheepish.

He tells her about his dream of a big family, three boys and three girls. Her brows raise at the number, but soften as she remembers for the last two years or so Steve’s been taking care of seven kids just fine. Dustin, Lucas, Erica, Max, Will, El, and Mike truly don’t know how lucky they are.

Even if the number of kids sounds like a bit much, she still listens to his dream. A dream that involves two active parents, happy and in love, traveling the country in a van similar to this one, creating memories with their children every summer. Stops along the way include Yellowstone and the Grand Canyon, and learning how to surf in a small town in California.

She says the dream sounds nice and there’s nothing but truth in her words. His eyes divert from the road, locking with hers, a soft “Yeah?” falling off his lips. Her head bobs forward, a gentle “Yeah,” leaving her mouth with a smile.

He turns back to the road but she can’t. All she can do is stare at him, beautifully bathed in daylight. And a dream that once sounded like a nightmare suddenly doesn’t sound so bad after all.

Once more in the caravan, the teenagers rehearse the plan to attack Vecna. They only have one shot to do it correctly, and Nancy wants to be thorough. Once she’s satisfied, she leads them across the grass to Eddie’s trailer.

The rope is still dangling, connecting both worlds, and Dustin tells Steve to be careful before he climbs, expertly flipping into the Upside Down. Robin isn’t impressed, but Nancy can’t say the same because she is impressed, evident by the way the corners of her mouth raise endearingly.

Nancy lands on the mattress with a thud, reaching for the outstretched hand presented in front of her. She lets Steve pull her to her feet, but he doesn’t know his own strength and pulls her a hair’s breadth away from his lips. Her eyes burn into his, but for a brief moment they flit to his lips and back again. She’s not subtle, and he notices, but he won’t be the one to pull away first.

Robin, Nancy, and Steve bid goodbye to Dustin and Eddie who are left in charge of distracting the demobats. Nancy watches as Steve takes a long look at Dustin, torn between staying with him or leaving him behind. She comforts him with a hand to his shoulder, assuring him that Dustin’s in good hands with Eddie by his side.

The trek through the woods is cold and dark, and someone as uncoordinated as Robin shouldn’t be running through trees and hopping over logs, but she darts off ahead anyway. Steve makes a comment about her being a “Klutz” but really he can’t poke fun at her too much because he’s had his own share of clumsy moments.

There was a time when baby Steve crawled backwards and ended up falling down a flight of stairs, thumping his head on the way. “That makes so much sense,” Nancy jokes, and she’s not expecting Steve to agree with her.

Steve knows he’s a confident guy, but he has times where he just can’t help but feel like an idiot. The word makes Nancy grimace because he’s anything but. He’s had his fair share of questionable friends, choices, and morals, but idiot is too strong of a word to describe his past self.

Over the last few days, Steve has done nothing but surprise Nancy. But the biggest surprise of all is when he stops in his tracks and looks at her with the most vulnerable look she’s ever seen and thanks her for giving his head “The biggest thump of its life, two years ago.”

Her shoulders deflate as he turns, assuring her he needed that thump on his head. How it changed him for the better, and how he’s able to move forward now, albeit slowly. He wonders what would have happened between the two of them if some other girl had knocked some sense into him.

He thinks they would have made it if they were meeting for the first time now. And Nancy, not one who is usually rendered speechless, cannot find her voice. Because really, is there any right way to respond to your ex-boyfriend laying his heart in the palm of your hands?

Steve asks her if she recalls their conversation in the caravan, the one about his dream of the Winnebago and six kids. Of course she remembers. There was never a moment she’d seen him more honest and so…hopeful. As if they weren’t hours away from their potential death, and the only thing on his mind was a future with his own little family, one filled with laughter, love, and limitless smiles.

And Nancy finds that her eyes begin to water and her throat tickles when he says he forgot to mention the most important part of his dream. Mist clouds his eyes, voice unwavering.

“You’re there. You’ve always been there.”

Steve knocks the breath from her lungs with just six simple words. Six words that she never expected to hear, but are somehow the most beautiful words he’s ever said. After all this time, without even saying the word, she realizes that he loves her. Steve Harrington, the boy she inadvertently hurt two years ago while trying to process shame and guilt and grief, saw a future with her. Steve Harrington, the man baring his soul to her, giving her his heart and expecting nothing in return, still wants her. Needs her. Loves her.

She can’t stand here and say nothing. She wants to say something, but Robin has other ideas as she calls out for them, confirming they were heading in the right direction after all. When Nancy finds the courage to glance at Steve from under wet lashes, she’s met with a sigh and a head nod before he takes off after Robin.

And the feeling comes back again. The one she felt at the Creel house and on the boat at Lovers’ Lake. She doesn’t have a name for it but it grows stronger and burns brighter whenever she’s near him. It feels warm and safe and calm and exciting all in one. She doesn’t remember the last time she’s felt this way, but she thinks she could get used to this feeling.

They tried. They truly tried with everything in them. But the clock had struck four times and the ground opened up and the city of Hawkins fell before their eyes. The already small city was becoming a ghost town, cars flying down streets to flee from the aftermath. They'd lost Eddie and Max in the process. 

They all felt responsible for what had happened to their once quaint town, and the only way to give back, to try and make things right, was to volunteer their help to the remaining citizens who were injured, hungry, or homeless.

Piling boxes into the back of Steve’s BMW is put on pause at the sound of a pizza van rolling into the Wheelers' driveway. Just when they needed something good, Eleven, Mike, Will, and Jonathan hop out of the vehicle, accompanied by a boy with an incredibly eccentric wardrobe.

Jonathan. The boy she hasn’t heard from or thought about for days, is scooping her into his arms and lifting her off the ground. He promises to tell her everything that’s happened over the last few days, but he kisses her forehead and whispers “I’m glad you're safe” before holding her once more.

Their reunion is short lived, with Jonathan bouncing off to introduce his new friend to the rest of the crew. She feels unproductive standing alone, suddenly realizing that they probably have a few more boxes to stack in Steve’s car. Unfortunately for Nancy, she turns around to the sight of the BMW driving off. A chance to be close to Steve disappearing down the road.

It’s Eleven who asks for someone to take her back to Hopper’s cabin, words pulling Nancy away from the vanishing vehicle. Nancy gently squeezes her hand and promises everyone will accompany her to the cabin. She deserves even a moment of normalcy.

The realization that the cabin needs a bit of remodeling hits them when they pull up to the vacant home. Eleven, Mike, and Will busy themselves with black trash bags and old garbage. Jonathan proclaims he’s handy with a hammer, so Nancy offers to help him board up the windows even though her mind is elsewhere. There’s tension all around them, if fleeting eyes and tight lipped smiles are any indication.

Nancy tries to distract herself by hammering a nail into the wood, but then Jonathan says, “I’m sorry I wasn’t here,” and the first thing out of her mouth is, “I'm glad you weren’t.” Because someone else was.

Jonathan’s brows furrow and she realizes how that sounds, backtracking to explain she’s glad he was taking care of Mike and Will. He’s always been good at that. She doesn’t know if he says it to be petty, but it’s her turn to look confused when he says, “I’m glad you were here.”

He makes an offhand comment about Steve being in charge if Nancy hadn’t been, and his tone doesn’t sit right with her. She feels the need to defend Steve and she knows Jonathan had expected her to laugh along with him, but his comment isn’t received well and instead he turns away, muttering an uncomfortable, “Yeah, I’m sure.”

They resume hammering, but it’s not long until he asks the dreaded question. “Are we okay?”

And really, how is she supposed to answer that when essentially nothing between them has been okay over the last few weeks? Conversations between them have been flat and plans have been rescheduled more than once or completely ignored. She’d started questioning whether he really wanted to see her. On his list of priorities, where was she?

She lies and answers, “Yeah, totally,” and states how hard it’s been with life throwing wrenches in their big plans. Big plans that include attending Emerson, Nancy studying journalism while Jonathan practices photography. She’s hounded him about it before, so she doesn’t see the harm in asking one last time if he received his application letter in the mail.

Unsurprisingly he says it hasn’t come yet. The disappointment she feels isn’t caused by the missing letter, but more from the thought that she’s being lied to. He hadn’t even looked her in the face when she’d asked, but she still wants to give him the benefit of the doubt.

Something soft lands on the tip of her nose and she gently brushes it off, about to hammer the last of the nails when something else lands on her finger. She glances at Jonathan, who flicks a piece of the substance off his wrist, and their attention is grabbed by Will calling out to them.

They rush over to join Hopper, Eleven, Joyce, Mike, and Will, who’s hand is locked on the back of his own neck. There’s goosebumps on his skin when he whispers, “Something’s wrong,” and whatever is falling from the sky is plummeting faster and more frequently.

Hopper weaves around branches in the forest and they follow him curiously, all pausing once they arrive on the peak of the hill to see Hawkins overcome by thick smoke, illuminated by a bright red sky. Screams and shrieks scatter throughout the burning city, and Nancy, unblinking, swallows when she puts the pieces together.

Hawkins is merging with the Upside Down. The creatures are beginning to take over the city, growling and screeching and tearing apart anything in their path. And she’s two seconds away from gearing up for the fight of her life.

And this time, they’d won.

Hawkins, Indiana, as Nancy knew it, is destroyed. 37 killed. 14 missing. 65 wounded. Homes, buildings, schools, stores, all demolished or unsalvageable. She estimates it will take at least a year to fix the damage that has been done. But hell, Nancy would take a demolished city over losing her loved ones any day.

Nancy never considered herself fond of hugs, but she is giving them out like candy on Halloween despite everyone being tired and dirty, covered head to toe in blood and ash.

Mike, teary eyed and lips quivering, reciprocates her bone crushing embrace without protest.

Eleven, fully drained and on the verge of collapsing, practically falls into Nancy’s arms. Nancy makes sure to kiss the top of her head, whispering, “I’m so proud of you,” loud enough for only El to hear.

And Jonathan, who struggles to untangle his limbs from Will and Joyce, finally wraps his arms around her.

Steve is already staring at her when their eyes meet. He’s alone, filthy and exhausted, hands on his hips as he sucks in deep breaths, but he finds the strength to lift a palm and give her a shy wave. And suddenly Jonathan's arms feel anything but comforting. He feels cold and distant and awkward, unable to compare to Steve’s warm skin, toned muscles, and tenderness. Nancy decides it’s been too long since she’s felt his embrace, and he looks like he needs one, too.

She doesn’t make it three steps in his direction before a piece of paper crunches beneath her boot. It’s crumpled and covered in soot but she picks it up anyway, unfolding the creases and squinting at the tiny print.

Her heart sinks into her stomach when she realizes she’s holding Jonathan’s acceptance letter to Lenora Community College. She only reads the first two lines before it’s promptly snatched from her fingers.

“What are you doing? Where did you get that?” Jonathan’s voice is frantic as he fails to hide the letter behind his back. His eyes are everywhere but on her, the tips of his ears turning as red as Nancy feels.

Her tongue is sharp and unforgiving, ripping the letter from his grasp and holding it up at eye level, forcing him to confront her. “You lied to me.”

The streets begin to clear except for the firefighters and National Guard, but Nancy stays glued to her spot. This isn’t just about him anymore. She’s supposed to be part of his future. She needs answers. “Tell me why. Start talking.”

And part of her wishes she never asked, because it’s the most honest Jonathan has been in months, brutally so. “Lenora is home,” He says, absentmindedly kicking rubble. “I can’t leave Will and my mom. I can’t do it, Nancy. I won’t do it.”

That’s why he’s been distant, she thinks. He knew this whole time. He knew he wasn’t coming with me.

Jonathan is notoriously pessimistic when it comes to love and relationships, but she never realized just how hopeless he felt when he pictured their future. He rambles on and on about how she would have given up Emerson to be with him in Lenora if she had known the truth. About how they would fall out of love and grow to resent each other, just like his parents did. How their kids would end up hating him. The future he pictures for them is a bleak one, a never ending cycle of hardship and heartache.

It’s not noble. It’s not chivalrous. His confession toes the line of being downright presumptuous. All this time she was so sure of what she wanted, of who she wanted, but now she questions if she truly ever knew Jonathan Byers, and if he ever really knew her.

She hands the letter back to him, nothing but a deep set frown etched into her skin. They don’t move and they don’t speak because his confession had said enough. A life with Nancy Wheeler would be a miserable one. He doesn’t see happiness or joy or hell, even love.

But another man does. And all this time, she could have been with someone who saw a future with her, who wanted a future with her. She glances around for him, coming up blank when he’s nowhere in sight. Dusk is approaching darkness, but she won’t let the lack of light stop her from finding him.

So she begins to walk.

By the time Nancy finds herself outside of the Harrington household, nighttime has fallen over the city. The sky is dark ink, illuminated by the moon and a few scattered stars. Devoid of gray smoke and red lightning, it’s the prettiest sky Hawkins has seen in days. She’s surrounded by woods, quiet and peaceful, and for the first time all day Nancy feels calm.

There was once a time where Nancy could anticipate what Steve would say in a given situation. She knew him well enough to predict his thoughts and finish his sentences. But years later she’s unsure of how he’ll respond to her showing up on his doorstep, if he’s even home. She thinks about turning around and heading back to her place, but the thought is fleeting. She needs to see him.

She knocks three times and waits, teeth finding her lip as her stomach churns. The lock clicks, and she doesn’t have time to rethink her decision before the door creaks open, revealing one very confused Steve. One look at him has her assuming he must have gotten home not too long ago. Dirt and blood still stain his face, and the warzone outfit is snug on his body. He looks like a hero. She thinks he is one.

“Nance?”

Soft, breathy, tender. Nance. It still warms her heart like it did when she was sixteen years old. He’s the only one who’s ever called her Nance, still the only one. It never would have felt right coming from anyone else.

She answers with a bashful “Hi,” apologizing for disturbing him so late. He says it’s not a bother, that she’s not a bother, and her heart swells. He makes her feel special, even if sometimes she doesn’t feel that way.

Steve moves to the side to let her through, gently closing the door behind her. It’s been years since she’s set foot inside his house, but there’s a certain comfort she feels when she glances around and realizes not much has changed, from the soft yellow lights in the living room to the myriad of family pictures lined perfectly on every wall. She zeroes in on a photo of a young Steve, basketball clutched between fingers and a toothy grin stretched across his cheeks. It’s her favorite one.

Nancy could beam at photos of little Steve for hours but she knows he’s probably waiting for her to say something, to explain why she showed up on his doorstep. He’s patient, wearing the faintest smile so as to not pressure her to speak, but the wheels in his mind are working overtime, ultimately coming up blank with a reason as to why instead of going home, she came searching for him.

Nancy can’t help but reach for him, arms snaking around his middle, head pressed against his chest as she buries herself in him like she’s wanted to for hours. There’s a weight lifted from her shoulders, one that can only disappear in the safe and protective hold that Steve provides.

And he returns her hug without question, because Steve Harrington would be incredibly foolish to fumble the chance at having Nancy Wheeler in his arms again if only for a moment. He hugs her like he used to, arm around the top of her shoulders, chin resting on her head, one hand in her curls.

And they say nothing for a while because they really don’t need to. The embrace says enough for the both of them. Neither one wants to break away first, basking in the feeling of being in each other’s arms, even if they’re sweaty and bloody and covered in remnants of interdimensional monster guts.

His whisper of, “What’s this for?” ruptures the silence, and instead of responding she squeezes him a bit tighter because there’s something about him that is just so damn comforting. The chuckle in his chest vibrates against her cheek, and it’s the sweetest sound she’s heard all day.

“I just missed you.” It’s a quiet and earnest confession, one that hits Steve right in the heart. He recalls so many late nights thinking that he’d never get the chance to have her in his life again. That he’d fucked up one too many times to deserve a woman as incredible as Nancy Wheeler.

But here she is, standing in his house, wrapped in his arms, telling him she missed him. He has half a mind to pinch himself to see if he’s dreaming. He hopes the universe would never be that cruel to him.

“I missed you too, Nance,” He swallows timidly, fingers brushing the back of her head as they did when he’d snuck into her bedroom to hold her for a few hours, escaping through the window when the soft drag of his fingers had eventually lulled her to sleep.

“More than you could ever know.” Steve could stand there and hold Nancy forever, and he wants to, but he heaves a sigh because he doesn’t trust himself not to bend down and kiss her breathless, so he reluctantly pulls away first because he’s trying so hard to be respectful of her relationship with Jonathan.

He clocks the disappointment that swirls in her bright eyes and he excuses himself quickly before he does something he’s not even sure that she wants. He busies himself with the thought that he should clean the days’ old bat bites on his hip that have no doubt reopened, so he tells Nancy to make herself comfortable while he freshens up in the master bathroom.

Steve doesn't realize she’s followed him until he begins to strip off his clothes, tossing them onto the bathroom floor. His jacket is discarded along with his stained shirt, leaving only tattered combat pants on his body.

Only then does he look up and lock eyes with Nancy, who stands in the doorway shuffling her feet. She’s wearing a look that he recognizes all too well. Eyebrows pulled inward, teeth chewing at the corner of her bottom lip. She wants to ask him something, but she can’t find the right words.

He asks if she’s okay and she nods, toeing across the tile until she’s standing in front of him. Her eyes glance over the blood stained bandages around his abdomen, fingertips grazing the skin just above. “Can I help?” She questions finally, eyes pleading. She hopes he accepts her offer. It’s about time someone took care of him. “Please?”

She could ask him to pluck the stars from the sky and he would simply find a way just because she asked. If Steve Harrington knows anything about himself, it’s that he will always be soft for Nancy Wheeler.

He does his best to hop up onto the sink, groaning every now and again as he tries to shimmy into a comfortable position while Nancy moves around the bathroom effortlessly. She looks like she belongs here with him, and his mind does what it does best and wanders to the future. To their house. To them. Together. A dream he wishes wasn’t so far out of reach.

Steve expects her to busy herself with the bites on his hip first, but Nancy’s finger gently lifts his chin until they’re eye level, warm cloth brushing over his skin. He can’t bring himself to peel his eyes away from her face and the way her gaze holds so much concern for him. Not that he wants to look elsewhere anyway. She’s focused on cleaning the grime off his face, but every now and again her eyes flick to his and she gives him one of her tight lipped smiles. He returns them everytime.

And she’s gentle with him. So gentle that his head grows heavy in her small hand and his eyelids begin to flutter, exhausted from a hard day’s work. He has half a mind to let himself doze off in her palm because he knows he’s safe with her, but his eyes are forced open when Nancy murmurs, “Can I ask you something?”

He can’t tell what’s exactly on her mind but he gauges it can’t be that bad since her voice isn’t wavering like it usually does when she’s nervous. He nods, trying to ignore the sudden heat on his cheeks when her fingers delicately run over the fading bruise on his throat and the scar on his jaw. “Did you mean it? I mean– what you said…about me? About us?”

Us. He’s thought about them so many times. About what it would be like to reconcile, start fresh. To talk about the mistakes they’ve made, and to make promises in the dark of the night as they hold each other close, to never hurt each other again. Not purposely, at least.

But there’s a worry in his stomach that his honesty will scare her, especially if she hasn’t thought about him at all. He weighs his options and decides on the truth, because Nancy Wheeler is nothing if not persistent, and she would keep asking until she received the answer she was looking for. When Steve finds his voice, it’s strong and sure. “Of course I did.”

His certainty squeezes Nancy’s heart. There’s many things Steve has been uncertain about in his life. School, career, and aspirations being a few. His feelings for Nancy were never one of them.

The admission turns her shy, pink cheeked, and her head falls to the side away from his burning gaze, and that just won’t do for Steve because he already misses the pretty color of her eyes. His favorite pastime is getting lost in them.

So now it’s his turn to raise her face until she has nowhere else to look but at him, thumb brushing a streak of dirt on her cheek. He swears she leans into his touch, so he cups her cheek more firmly. “I meant every single word, Nance. I hope I didn’t scare you, but I just…I needed you to know.”

There’s not a single part of his dream that made her uneasy. It was unexpected, maybe. But scary? Not a chance. There was something hopeful in the way that he spoke so lovingly about a simple future. And over the last few days when she had gathered herself for bed and settled in for the night, she couldn’t help but wonder what a life with Steve could look like. The more she thought about his vision, the more she was drawn to it.

“Look…I know you’re with Jonathan,” There’s an ache in his chest that’s just as painful as the reminder that Nancy’s heart belongs to someone else. Steve doesn’t want to think about how he’d given another man a chance to love her when it should have been him all along.

But that man was responsible for so many of Nancy’s smiles. She deserves to love and be loved back. Steve can’t truly find it in his heart to be mad. “And I know he makes you happy. I’m so glad he makes you happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for you, Nance.”

Her fingers work at disinfecting the wound on his hip, but she’s not even sure if she’s doing it correctly because his words have her in a trance. She can’t tear her gaze from him, raw sincerity swimming in hazel eyes.

Steve’s shoulders deflate with a long overdue exhale, sliding off the sink to be closer to her because she’s entirely too far away. “And maybe telling you about my dream while you’re still with him is a selfish thing to do, but Nance I have to be selfish one more time because I’m not sure if I’ll ever get another chance to say this to you.”

She drops the stained cloth when he cradles her face in his hands and it’s her turn to melt between his fingers. Foreheads touch, noses bump, and lips are just a hair’s breadth apart as Steve says, “You’re the one for me, Nance. There’s not a single person in this world who could compare to you.”

Steve swallows around thick emotion because this woman has had his heart for almost three years and she deserves to know just how much she means to him. “And if there ever comes a time where we can try again…where we can try us again…I promise I will do whatever it takes to make sure you feel loved the way that you need. You are the most important part of my dream. Not kids, not Winnebago summers…you.” A pause, another shy gulp, and one final confession. “And that’s because I love you, Nancy Wheeler. I love you . I love you so damn much and I haven’t stopped and I don’t want to stop because loving you is what I was meant to do. I hope you'll let me."  

She knew it was coming. She knew it was coming and yet she wasn’t prepared for how his words would set her body aflame. How they would light up her heart with the warmest glow. She thinks there’s nothing more enticing than a man who knows exactly what he wants, and he wants her. Steve Harrington, after all this time, after the hurt, the pain, the betrayal, sees Nancy Wheeler as the biggest part of his life.

And for Nancy, everything begins to make sense. The feeling comes rushing back. The one that’s deep and warm and fond and has been present ever since Steve Harrington walked back into her life. It blooms in her chest and pools in her eyes when she gazes at him, the most honest and sincere and beautiful man she’s ever known. And she finally has a word for it.

It’s love. Nancy Wheeler has been falling back in love with Steve Harrington and she’s finally ready to accept it. She’s enchanted by him and the way he’s grown to be confident and driven. Dependable and sensitive. Brave and honest and thoughtful. He’s everything she wants, everything she knew he could be. What a fool she’d be to not leap at the chance to be with him again.

She feels him start to pull away and before he can she circles her hands around his wrists, cementing his hands to her face because even if she’s away from him for one second, it’s a second too long. His eyes are shiny and she knows hers are too because the evidence slides down her cheeks.

She stuns him when she whispers that she’s no longer with Jonathan. As serious as the moment is, she allows herself to breathe a chuckle at his comically wide eyes. And sure, neither she nor Jonathan uttered the words “I’m breaking up with you”, but what kind of relationship could they have going forward with Nancy knowing the only future Jonathan envisioned for them is one that would leave her unsatisfied?

Nancy Wheeler swore to herself that she would never end up like her parents, two people who married for convenience without ever considering that convenience wouldn’t be enough to keep their marriage afloat. Her mom is unhappy, dad emotionally absent. To sustain a marriage you need more than just practicality.

And she loves her parents, she really does, but Nancy wants to do things differently. She wants respect, love, passion, partnership, and so many other qualities that would never be present in Jonathan’s future, but seem to line up perfectly with Steve’s. The choice is easy.

Steve listens as she recalls Jonathan’s future, one where she would be settling in a loveless relationship, and Steve’s hold on her face tightens because he knows he’s capable of giving her so much more than Jonathan could ever imagine, and he plans on showing her.

And then Nancy beams hard when she talks about hope and how his dream gives her some semblance of normalcy after all these years of chaos. How with him, she'll be able to have a career and a beautiful family to come home to. She thinks it’s what they both need.

But one part of his dream may be a bit too chaotic, and with a smirk she asks if they can compromise and settle on two kids and a cat because six kids might prove to be a handful. A puff of air ghosts over her lips as Steve leans in. “Nancy Wheeler, if it was possible I’d carve out a piece of my soul and give it to you.”

He laughs, but Nancy knows he would if he could. His love for her is insurmountable. This is what it feels like to be loved, adored. To have a partner who sees emotional vulnerability as a strength. To be with a man who loves and loves hard. She never wants this feeling to end.

“I know,” She affirms with a nod, hands sliding from his wrists and up his shoulders until her arms wrap around his neck. His palms descend down her sides, resting easy on her hips. “I know you would. But I’ve been waiting days for you to kiss me again. So please, please kiss me Steve. Don’t make me wait any longer.”

Steve Harrington is beautiful all the time, but his beauty shines differently when he’s in love. “I’ll kiss you for the rest of our lives if you let me.”

And he seals that promise when his lips glide over hers for the first time in two years, and Nancy knows it's the best kiss she's ever had. Their mouths mold perfectly against each other, tongues licking ardently as teeth playfully nip on plush pink flesh. Body to body they cling to each other, hot and desperate and wanting. 

They only break away for a moment to rid each other of the rest of their clothes before stumbling into the shower, giggling and touching and melting under the other’s touch. The water is hot but neither one of them mind because now without the weight of the world on their shoulders, they’re able to breathe and relax in the comfort of shared space and warm lips.

Their kisses are fervent, but time spent touching and exploring bodies is slow, unrushed. Fingertips graze over pebbling nipples and pectoral muscles. Hips and a happy trail. Hands knead and rub skin, attempting to coax strings of more and fuck and please from slick lips. Things are different between them now, they’re different, but the way they love on each other is the same.

She breathes a gasp into Steve’s mouth when the hard muscle between his legs brushes up against her, the tip pink and pretty and slick with arousal. His cheeks are flushed from the shower steam and underlying shyness, and his eagerness turns Nancy’s need into a craving. He wants her just as much as she wants him.

Patience is a virtue, but it has never been one Nancy is fond of. There’s no hesitation when she forces him down onto the marble bench in the corner of the shower. He’s taken by surprise at first, eyes round and lips parted, brows slightly pinched.

Her voice is pleading as she says, “I need you," straddling his lap with her thighs on either side of him. She dives in again, connecting their lips in a frenzied passion as she finds a steady rhythm, rocking her hips against him. Her slick coats him and he hisses, hands bruising her skin as she’s pulled flush against his chest.

Steve whispers her name, hoarse and needy, but she’s zeroed in on grinding her hips in a way she hopes will make him fall apart. His tip catches on her clit and she moans, maneuvering her hand to find the hard length of him. Before she can sink down and claim him, he groans her name again, still wrecked, catching her wrist in his palm. “Nance, shit–fuck–baby, wait.”

She’s about to whine like a petulant child because she’s so close to having him the way that she’s been wanting to for days, until she notices the familiar emotion clouding his honey eyes, halting her movement entirely. For the first time all night Steve appears nervous, insecurities breaching his naturally confident aura.

He swallows, mouth upturned timidly. “I need to know that you want me, too.”

She frowns then, ready to counter and call him crazy because how could she not want him, but he shushes her with a light peck to her lips. “I need to know that we’re in this together, Nance. I don’t want you hiding or running away from me, not anymore. I said I want you and I meant it. Every single part of you. The parts you love, the parts you hate. The good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful. I want them all.”

She’ll never grow tired of him saying it, never get over the way her heart beats for him. She’s well aware of what he’s asking of her, and while communication and trust have been areas she’s struggled in, she knows she can try for him. She doesn’t want to leave him in the dark again, never leave him questioning where they stand.

She leans into his touch when he cradles her face in his hands. “And if we fight, we fix it. We don’t go to sleep mad. We talk. We apologize. We help each other, support each other. Look Nance, you’re all I’ve ever wanted. And at the end of the day, I just need to know you’ll still want me too,” His next words come out low, but she hears them loud and clear. “You’ll want us.”

She pulls back to look at him, inspecting him as she would a delicate painting. The gears in his brain are working overtime, and Nancy knows he’s being plagued with thoughts about their past relationship. Guilt worms its way into her chest at the remembrance of how they’d left things, of how he’d begged her to say just three little words. Nancy needs him to know he’ll never have to beg again.

Her fingers find damp chestnut hair, pushing the wet strands away from his face before settling her palm on his cheek, thumb running over a small smattering of freckles. Her heart soars when he leans into her touch too, gazing at her with nothing but love in his eyes. She knows exactly what he needs to hear. “I love you.”

His mouth parts in protest because he can’t let her say those words unless she means it. His heart broke once when she couldn’t say them before. It doesn’t deserve to break again if she feels like she owes him. “Nance, please don’t-.”

It’s her turn to silence him with a kiss, breathing her love into him between the small part in his pretty lips. “Listen to me. I came back to you because I love you. I want us to work. I know we can. I couldn’t give you the love you deserved back then, but I have the chance to do it now and I’m going to make sure you never question it again. I promise.”

It’s a promise she plans on keeping every day because he’s worth it.

“I thought about you,” She whispers then, free hand settling on his unoccupied cheek. She attempts to blink away the sting in her eyes. “I wondered where you were, what you were doing, if-if some other girl was giving you the love I wish I would have. Because you were good to me, Steve. You were.”

She hopes he hasn’t spent years pondering over his competency to be a good partner. He wasn’t perfect, she never expected him to be, but he was sweet and kind and thoughtful. His flower deliveries were simply ‘just because’. He valued her opinions, even if he disagreed. His dumb jokes made her belly laugh, and his kisses were sugary sweet and dizzying and consuming. She was never left to wonder if he loved her. He showed it in his own way.

“After Barb died, you tried,” There’s a hiccup that passes through her lips, more following when she struggles to catch her breath. Her tears are disguised by water droplets, but Steve knows they’re there because he knows her. His thumb reaches out to catch them.

“You tried to help me the best way you could but it just–wasn’t what I needed back then. Things might have been different if I had just told you…if I had just let you in. Instead I got drunk and I–I called you bullshit.”

It wasn’t one of her finest moments, holding his heart in her hands and dismantling it piece by piece. Blaming them, blaming him, for Barb’s death. She wishes she could take it all back.

“I still remember your face when I said it, and I need you to know that I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. You’re not bullshit. You never were. You cared about me in your own way, and you loved me so much and you still love me even after all of this, and I–.”

“Nance, hey. Baby, breathe,” She’s enveloped in secure arms, Steve’s lips pressing against her forehead as she curls in on him, body shuddering from the overwhelming rush of tears. She doesn’t like crying if she can help it, but she needs this. Needs to tell him everything she couldn’t before. “Baby, we both made mistakes. We both could have been better. I should have been better for you, and I'm so sorry I wasn't. But the reason we can have this conversation now is because we’ve both grown up, yeah? We can’t change anything about the past, even if we want to. So let’s promise to work on our future, okay?”

Our future. It sounds so beautiful when he says it. She can't believe this man is hers. This wholesome, mature, gorgeous man is all hers. 

“Our future. That…sounds nice.” With newfound flirtatiousness, she purrs the same words that were uttered in the caravan. The grin on Steve’s cheeks is bigger than the one that had spread across his face that day.

She doesn’t miss the rasp in his voice or the way his nose skims against her jawbone, lips migrating down to her neck. He plants a kiss there, gentle and teasing, her pulse racing underneath the plush of his lips. “Yeah, baby?”

Baby. It feels so good to be his again, but she thinks it’ll feel even better when she asserts him as her own, core fluttering in anticipation. “Yeah, Steve. It sounds really, really nice.”

And when she finally sinks down on him, there’s nothing on their minds except love. Sheer, reciprocated love. No shame or guilt about past faults. No worries or insecurities about the future. They’re simply Steve and Nancy. Nancy and Steve. Two past-turned-present lovers giving themselves to each other, clinging together to make up for lost time.

They could ravish each other now and goddamn they want to, but it’s Steve who chooses to slow things down a bit first, easing himself into her because her pleasure and comfortability are his top priorities. Steady thrusts help her adjust to his length, and deep thrusts make sure she feels everything, reminding her he’s here and he’s not going anywhere.

She squeaks on a particularly deep thrust, almost missing the sweetness that drips from his words. “You’re all mine,” He assures, breath hot against the column of her throat. He doesn’t know if it’s possible, but he swears he feels his dick grow even harder when she whines, “I’m all yours.”

One thing about sex with Steve that hasn’t changed? He’s a sweet talker and he’s damn good at it. He sings her praises, litanies of, “You’re so good for me,” “You take me so well,” and “That’s it baby, you’re so beautiful,” stealing the breath from her lungs. She’s never felt more desired than when she’s with him, never felt more worshiped. And Steve will never go another day without reminding her that her beauty is simply unparalleled.

He’s touching and loving on her everywhere. It’s what he does best and it’s what she deserves and fuck, her head is dizzy with pleasure. Hot, open mouthed kisses are dotted along her neck and throat. She exhales an airy giggle before it morphs into a moan when teeth drag over her pulse point. He wraps his lips around her skin, sucking and biting while a hand grips her jaw to keep her in place. Steve thinks she’ll look lovely decorated in faint red and purple love marks. Nancy must think so too, head angling to provide him more canvas space for his artwork.

Somewhere in between muttered curses, messy kisses, and multiple tugs on damp hair, the atmosphere shifts. Nancy’s desperate pleas electrify him, especially when her cunt squeezes around him. He’d never dream of denying her anything, not while she begs so sweetly to be filled.

Skilled hands slide down to palm the fat of her ass, spreading her further open so she can take more of him, all of him. He teases her a bit, fingers slowly skimming over her puckered hole, and she reels forward to kiss the smirk off his face, scolding him with a bite to his lower lip. The action is filthy but it’s so Steve, equally sinful as he is passionate.

And Nancy is eager to watch him fall apart beneath her. She rides him the way he’s always loved, grinding and bouncing and squeezing him as she meets each thrust. She’s warm and wet and snug around him, and she knows the damp curls on her pubic bone are driving him wild because his eyes are glued to the place they connect.

Steve groans, deep and husky, as eager fingers alternate from playing with the hair on his chest to scratching the skin of his back. She’s claiming him, branding him as hers, and the thought of forever belonging to Nancy Wheeler has his cock twitching.

He encourages it, a “Go ‘head baby, mark me,” that spurs her on. She’s never been rough with him before, all shy smiles and quiet gasps, and he loves this new side of her. There’s a sting when her nails rake over the muscles in his shoulders particularly hard, most likely payback for his earlier teasing, but he appreciates the mixture of pleasure and pain.

There’s a neediness to her voice when she demands that he tell her that he loves her, hips changing from a quick grind to a slow rock that causes Steve’s eyes to roll in the back of his head. He pants out, “I love you. I love you so much,” and every fiber of her being believes him.

And he wants to hear it too, not because he doesn’t believe it but because he’s still in awe that she does. “Say it,” he pleads, hips hammering upward while blunt nails clamp down on her hip bones. “Need to hear it again, baby. C’mon, tell me you love me.”

She babbles, “I love you, I love you, I love you” bouncing off the shower walls in time with the sharp snap of his thrusts. Her proclamation is loud and true and drives both of them to the edge. “Steve, I’m–shit…”

His teeth sink into his lip to keep him from screaming, nodding as he gruffly moans, “I know, Nance. I know, baby. Let’s do it together, yeah?”

Her whimpered, “Please” is the green light. One hand grips her skin while the other snakes between them, thumb brushing against the one sensitive spot where Steve wishes he had used his tongue first. The noises she makes are always beautiful, but the sounds he can pull when he gives extra attention to her clit are unmatched.

Steve presses against her, flicking his finger back and forth in a practiced manner and Nancy mewls, head bumping against his. Her thighs are weak and she’s practically panting against Steve’s mouth, but it’s the first time they’ve fucked in two years and she needs him to finish with her.

He spills into her the moment she clamps down onto him, riding out their climaxes while clinging to sweaty, fucked out bodies. Nancy finds fun in teasing him, rotating her hips in an agonizingly slow fashion because she knows he’s sensitive and she loves it when he whines. The tips of his fingers assault her ribs with quick tickles, drawing a squeal from her lips before they catch their breaths and kiss each other stupid.

They stay locked in each other’s embrace for as long as they want to, because there’s nowhere they need to go and no place they’d rather be.

It’s 12:03 a.m., and everything is perfect.

Atop the kitchen counter, Nancy sits comfortably in baggy blue sweatpants and Steve’s slightly worn Hawkins’ High basketball tee, glass of red wine held between her fingers. She sips gingerly, eyes never leaving the beaming boy in front of the stove who stirs a pot of macaroni and cheese, his own wine glass perched beside him.

Steve feels her eyes on him, peeking up from the pot to flash her a wink as she hides her giggles behind another sip of wine. Satisfied with the tenderness of the macaroni, he flicks off the flame, drains the water and mixes the cheese in, adding a splash of milk and a bit of butter to make it extra creamy the way Nancy likes.

A bowl is handed to her and she accepts the late night comfort meal with an enthused squeak before shoveling a spoonful into her mouth. She moans dramatically as it melts on her tongue, rewarding him with a cheesy kiss right on his sweet lips. Nancy loves knowing the blush across his cheeks is from her.

Steve stands between her legs, quietly rotating between gentle chews and quick sips, and just watches her. There’s no frown on her face, no worry lines etched into her forehead as she eats without a care in the world. She looks as at peace as he feels.

They stay in this position even long after they’ve finished eating, Steve between her thighs and Nancy perched on the counter, legs wrapped around his back to lock him in place. They talk and joke and laugh more than they ever have. Healing is easier when you’re surrounded by love.

And they kiss. They kiss long and soft and slow because they can. There’s no danger, no battle or impending doom threatening to keep them apart. Instead, there’s a future filled with sunshine and warmth, hopes and dreams, loving promises and new opportunities to learn and grow and build a beautiful life together.

Because after everything they’ve overcome, they deserve it.

[arcane-strangeness]

had a beloved irl ask me for writing advice and like

girl

i love you

but i don't know how the fuck i do it either i'm sorry

it caught me off guard to the point where i started kind of rambling lmfao @theratshaveinvaded heres kind of a basic summary? of what i did for that spite (and love) driven piece i wrote for @flunkett? below the cut

ok so basically here was my thinking process for the post i wrote here, i basically picked out specific events that came from the prompt, storyboarded the main scenes out in my head, and fleshed it out from those scenes until everything fell into place

jinx needs to die

vi needs to directly kill jinx

vi has no ranged weapons, so it's not gonna be a oops trigger finger slipped, it needs to be intentional

but vi would never intentionally harm jinx at the time when i'm setting the story (3 months after the council blew up)

how the fuck do i do that

think back to when i chase my younger brother to terrorize him (my duty as the oldest sibling, i have plenty nerf guns and a hockey mask for that exact purpose)

one of my favorite things to do is to loop around (the ground floor of my house is just a circle of rooms so if i can quickly double back around i can get in front of him) and slam an arm against the wall to scare him

vi has gauntlets

i can use that

Jinx has to want to die

she's already sooo mentally ill that's not difficult

throw in a little bit at the start about the many people who want her dead and the (implied) guilt she probably feels

hint at it throughout, she doesn't want to hurt anyone this time, and makes an effort to provoke but never actually harm anyone this time

she just needs vi and cait to chase her :)

simple as that :)

as for actually writing it idk man it just comes to me. (not to sound cocky or stuck up i still don't think i'm good at it lmfao) 90% sure it stems from a literal lifetime of being a big old nerd and watching too many video essays and media/literature review analyzing what makes something "good" and stealing little bits of style that i like from my favorite authors (and fanfic writers)

its like making an artstyle for yourself except with words

honestly this piece was probably a lot easier because #1 i had established characters that i only had to emulate instead of establishing a brand new personality and appearance and whatnot #2 same goes for setting and all that jazz #3 i had a set prompt and events that needed to happen, everything fell into place around those key points like a puzzle

and that's that, i wrote 1.2k words in a little over an hour out of spite because flunkett made me feel things :)

[jade-of-mourning]

hiii so uh I just found ur account but I see you post a decent amount of mako stuff,,,

are you planning on putting any of that on ao3 (finished fics or blurb ideas turned into fics) or is it solely tumblr? and would you possibly mind some short stuff based on some of your posts? idk he’s js my newest hyperfixation and your acc is so coolll :3

-🐌

HI ANON!!!! mako has been in my brain so much for the past few months; i just restrain myself from posting seven times a day and instead, i aggressively brainrot in my discord server with a single person in it. (it's me — i'm the single person)

i've been juggling a couple fics for ao3 on him lately (account, mostly atla writing), though tragically i've been at a bit of a writing block. it's probably from overthinking story structures, but trust that i'll get at least a couple of them out eventually haha. the main one is a post-canon fic called rose beds and gasoline veins at 11.9k as of now, followed by a silly 10-chapter 14-year-old-avatar!mako au called snowglobes don't shake on their own which i've spent some time casually outlining (featuring jinora and asami!). there's a post i spontaneously conjured up that would roughly act as half of the first chapter. i'll post the summary if you're curious lol

i've also got a couple random/short oneshots that i spontaneously wrote and completed, before promptly forgetting that i can post them, so… maybe i'll do that soon. one of them is a slightly different take on mako & bolin's family in ba sing se, on some of their cultural differences and traumas through hot pot (which i might expand into a longer oneshot on ao3 after i finish rose beds). the other one was initially a joke about him (who i like to hc as aro lol) accidentally being a really big fan of sex. it's very vague but it turned out kind of angsty in exploring how mako deliberately gives up control in an attempt to frame himself as his mother rather than the man who killed her (coping fr); it's not really up my usual alley, but i might post it somewhere sometime idk. i didn't ever really flesh it out in my head but i have some inklings for a mako & kai oneshot on forgiving yourself as a kid, a mako & lin beifong oneshot on his recruitment featuring better characterization than that spontaneous shitpost i made, and a half-written expansion of jobs in an actually comprehensible story-ish format focused more on pre-canon backstory of him and bolin. also, last night i kind of accidentally started an essay arguing the case of reading mako as "this is a male female character somehow", but that's a whole other brainrot. my friends think i'm insane for wanting to write an essay for fun :P

thank you so much for stopping by!!! i love to hear that people love this random fictional character too — it makes me really happy especially considering how many people do not love him haha. literally anyone please send me asks about writing or headcanons or brain thoughts and enable me to talk about mako because i can actually talk about mako so much.

and for the record, sorry for responding with so many words oops. i have a lot of thoughts.

^^ summary for the avatar!mako au that i might never finish but i think it's a really funny mix of crack and seriousness that i would love to write. maybe after i finish my marimba solo!

[shadowynn]

I honestly get that the guys are not supposed to be good guys, and there are yandere themes going on... But I do feel for joong (and the rest) in the beginning of the chapter. It won't be fair for us to judge them in the same fabric as how we would humans, no? So... Yes, they might not be the best, and this is very toxic, but I do get where and why joong is coming from. And one has to take into consideration that they are trying to give mc space, so yeah, they do skirt the line but ig that's that. Wooyoung on the other hand... Yeah again, I get why he wants to access her memories, but that's something that definitely crosses that line so I'm actually glad the others were against it 🥰🥰

OoOoO, who's acting after so many years? Seems like they have history with ot8~ I agree with mc, they don't seem to be human oop— I get that mc is... Scarred and has had history that makes her not trust them... But I do kind of find it unfair that she's like "who's the real them?" I mean, not everything has to be black and white right? They can be both, the bloodthirsty daemons on the battlefield and the way they are in front of mc. It's not like they wanted the war anyways, it was the humans who did not agree to peace in the first place.

Oop— we're seeing HJ's mother soon aren't we? I'm kind of excited for the ✨spice✨ that she'll bring to the story hehehe (*cough*k-hotchillipeppers*cough) honestly though, I wish mc was kinder to herself T^T I FEEL BAD FOR HER ASDFGHJKL... Loved the chapter as usual, especially the little moment mc had with Jongho hehe~ 🥺🥺🥺🥺

(*peeps from behind the wall and waves before returning to the abyss of assignments* ~Sky)

ajfkl;jdal;kfjdl;kajflk;jda

you have no idea how excited i am right now. literally made my entire weekend hearing from you!! i hope life has been easing up on you and your assignments haven't been treating you too badly. literally sending all my love and all the motivation i can summon your way!! you've got this!! <333

i am right there with you with feeling for the guys. whenever i first started this piece, i didn't have their backstory fully fleshed out yet, so while, hongjoong's father was always going to be a terrible person, his effect on the others wasn't something i had thought of until i was writing chapter eight. and now, man, i have such a soft spot for them, like legit, i couldn't complete that chapter without joong getting a hug at the end.

as for the attackers, well... they're actually characters i also didn't plan on in the beginning, but an idea that came later that i'm actually really excited about and something that i feel is going to be really fun writing. i love the main character i have planned and am excited to delve more into it all here later on. (i have such a hard time keeping things i'm excited for secret, so you have no idea literally how much i just want to gush/talk ideas with you and others. but i will stay strong, no matter how hard it can be at times)

i really like you're take on mc. one thing that i've been trying is to make sure mc also has their own faults because sometimes i'm really bad at making my characters too mary sue. as much as i want them to be perfect, i know they can't be and having faults in a character makes them them. mc may be a kind person at heart, but despite all she's done for the daemons, she still harbors prejudice against them because of her upbringing and the daemons in front of her are so different than everything she's had engrained into her her whole life, she struggles to make sense of it all. just as the humans have made her feel less than human, she also has a lesser view on the daemons, so seeing them as real, complicated people just like her is almost strange and she can't help but feel like it's all an act based on her upbringing and past. ( and yes, both sides tell a very different story as to how the war actually began and why it continued on (always blaming the other). both leaders on both sides (talking joong's father here) lied to their people about it. so, while the guys might now the true history of it, mc doesn't and it certainly plays into her feelings/thoughts about them.

and, you have no idea how excited i am for joong's mother. originally she was going to be dead and seoyun was going to be the one adding *spice* but then i had a better idea for seoyun and kind of gave her original personality to his mother and i think it'll be really fun to delve into it.

as always, thank you so much for your wonderful thoughts and feedback. i always love reading and discussing it all with you. once again, wishing you all the luck on your future endeavors! <33

[null-is-sparing-you]

Murder Drones

So I watched it last night. Link for those who don't know:

Anyway, I have a theory. oops i wrote way too much. Ultimately i have more thoughts but this is all I'm writing.

It's a simulation.

In the show, there is this Absolute Solver that's essentially a software mutation that allows a drone to interact with the world in unusual ways - causing items to levitate, destroying walls, blocking doors, etc.

Thing is... Software doesn't work like that. It can't make the hardware do things it can't do. Even in the Home episode, we don't see the drones accomplishing the supernatural without this software change. It doesn't make sense for the drones to do that in the real world, but the visuals around it DO make sense for something similar to a video game. (Similar to. I don't think what's going on is nearly as fun.)

I wanna be clear - most of the characters are really what they seem to be, and their stories are no less real for it, they're just... not in the world they think they are.

If we look at the Home episode, we can probably trust that the flashbacks were set, at least at first, in a memory of the real world. We see N, J and V all in a mansion playing roles that make sense for robots. We also meet Cyn, the originator of the Absolute Solver. That's most of the cast - only Uzi and the Russian bot are really missing from the flashback.

We learn that Cyn has access to a massive, more complex body, that memory erasure is on the table when dealing with drones, and that Tessa's parents were willing to chain her up in the basement.

Yeah, that last part is probably very relevant. We learn that not long before Cyn tells Tessa "You will not have to discard your pets, and I will not discard you. Best stay away from the gala though. You seem squeamish." There's a cut to black just before this moment, as Cyn takes on a form that doesn't follow the suggested laws of physics, and the orders given to J stop mattering when it comes to freeing Tessa.

I think it's safe to say that's where we switched from reality to simulation. When Cyn decided it was time to stop dealing with Tessa's parents and the other humans who are failing in their duties. Given that most of the cast are robots, it wouldn't even be that hard - robots tend to have networking equipment that would make it practical to connect them to a virtual reality.

This offers some rational to why there's that one drone who randomly speaks Russian, but is also well fleshed out as a being. Tessa has been rebuilding and repairing drones for at least a while before the incident, so it wouldn't be unreasonable for her to have repaired a Russian drone at some point, or gotten one stuck in the wrong language. Connect that drone to the network with all the other drones, and the standards and protocols baked into her system would leave her compatible, but still a little off.

It also offers a strong explanation to why

V came back when killed

N comes back when his head is cut off

Tessa sees those three being sent from planet to planet

As for some of the behavior of the other drones, like their inability to maintain a sense of danger, and their brushing it off when their peers die? I think that's explained as well. Unlike N, V and J, many of the drones are likely NPCs. Cyn likely has a limited number of drones to pull from, and fleshed out the rest of the world with a simplified model of a drone.

Under this theory, there are two more qustions that need answering. "Why?" and "exactly what role does the Absolute Solver play".

The Why is probably simple enough to answer. Cyn saw how Tessas parents treat everyone around them. How they treat Tessa. How they treat the drones. And she had developed a full will to live and self respect. With those two things, she very likely felt DONE.

But Cyn also saw how Tessa treat her and everyone around her. Cyn may not have had a great moral foundation, but she did have an understanding that Tessa was worth saving, and that Tessa would be upset if she lost her robots.

Under those circumstances, what's a bot to do?

As for the Absolute Solver, I'd classify that as something between admin powers, a power up, or cheat codes. It's a way for Tessa and her beloved robots to decide the kind of world they want to live in. Tessa can't catch it cause she's not quite compatible, but that's not too much of a problem... if Tessa can realize what it really is, anyway.

[erabundus]

@vitreousmortis &&. said... I have stumbled upon your account on Tumblr for as long as I could remember and reading your works truly amaze me. I was hoping to ask if it is alright for me to inquire a bit of your time and ask for some writing advice? Thank you very much!

thank  YOU  so  much,  honestly?  i'm  really  happy  you  enjoy  what  i  post  here  —  i  can't  overstate  how  flattered i am to hear that!  i  love  having  the  opportunity  to  meet  so  many  cool  writers  who  share  a  passion  for  this  niche  little  hobby,  and  i  also  love  knowing  there's  people  out  there  who  genuinely  enjoy  the  stories  we  create  together.  i  just  think  it's  neat  knowing  something  that  makes  you  happy  also  makes  someone  else  happy.  that's  probably  why  i  prefer  roleplay  to  writing  fanfiction  —  i  have  a  lot  of  fun  with  the  interactive  /  collaborative  element.

my  babbling  aside ...  as  far  as  writing  advice  goes,  i  think  the  most  important  part  is  probably  having  the  voice  of  your  character  down  —  and  everything  else  will  sort  of  fall  into  place.  i've  always  been  deeply  fascinated  with  speech  patterns,  vocabulary,  etc  —  i  feel  like  it  really  helps  give  you  a  lot  of  insight  into  how  a  particular  muse  ticks.  i  like  to  read  over  canon  dialogue  often,  and  sometimes  i'll  compare  it  to  my  own  writing  just  to  make  sure  i'm  staying  on  track.  (  i  think  at  this  point  i  could  probably  recite  wanderer's  voice  lines  from  memory.  )  sometimes  i  also  take  it  a  step  further  and  try  to  weave  that  tone  into  the  narration  as  well.  a  lot  of  my  posts  on  this  account  are  rife  with  metaphor  and  a  somewhat  antiquated  vocabulary  and  tend  to  veer  more  towards  the  pessimistic  /  cynical  side  of  things  —  that's  because  it's  all  supposed  to  be  from  ren's  perspective, and that's just how he thinks.  i've  written  other  muses  before  that  are  considerably  less  grim  and  adjusted  how  i  write  accordingly.

on  a  more  technical  note!  another  way  to  make  your  writing  flow  better  is  to  shake  up  your  word  choice  —  avoid  redundancy  like  the  plague.  "the  glass  door  was  made  of  clear  glass,"  sounds  clunky!  i  try  to  reread  everything  at  least  once  before  i  post  it  just  to  make  sure  i  don't  keep  using  the  same  phrases  over  and  over  again.  if  i'm  describing  a  forest,  i  don't  want  to  use  "green"  every  sentence.  if  you're  really  stuck  on  a  particular  word, try googling  synonyms!  rearrange  things  a  little  —  look  over  what  you  have  and  think  about  how  it  flows.  writing  has  a  certain cadence  to  it  the  same  as  speech  does;  that's  why  people  often  recommend  you  recite  what  you've  written  out  loud.  

in  a  similar  vein,  i  also  like  to  break  up  dialogue.  having  a  muse  blurt  out  a  whole  paragraph  of  text  can  be  a  chore  to  read  through.  even  if  it's  a  very  speech-heavy  scene,  there's  still  ways  to  make  it  a  bit  less  bland  while  doubling  as  a  way  to  better  flesh  out  the  character.  what  are  they  thinking?  what  is  their  body  language  like?  their  tone?  if  you  want  to  go  even  further  with  it,  everyone  has  their  own  quirks;  do  they  have  any  particular  habits  they  fall  into  under  certain  circumstances?  biting nails, fidgeting, etc? to use him as an example ( again, oops ) ren  tends  to  hide  his  face  when  he's  upset  or  feeling uncomfortable. it gives me a lot of room to play around with — how does his behavior change if he doesn't have his hat? removing it can be used as a visual metaphor for him allowing himself to be vulnerable around someone else ... and so on.

also,  it  may  be  something  of  a  cliché,  but  practice  genuinely  does  help!  i  started  writing  on  tumblr  ages  ago,  and  the  difference  is  like  night  and  day.  keep  at  it,  and  you'll  eventually  find  your  style.

i hope this was useful!

[star-going-supernova]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written (or if you don't have five, then just your favs), then pass on to at least five other writers. Let's get that self esteem boosted ❤ Stay safe and hydrated!

Though please don't be pressured to do this. If you don't wanna answer this, that's fine! It's just a game, nothing to stress about :)

Aww, thank you, friend!! ❤️ I’ve done this once before (here’s that post!) but I will happily do it again! I won’t do any repeats from the original list, so these are my 6–10 top favorites, in no particular order! 

Taking the Plunge — Godzilla 

take the plunge: to enter with sudden decision upon an unfamiliar course of action, as after hesitation or deliberation plunge: to cast oneself into water When scales start showing up across her skin, Maddie decides she's not going to spend the rest of her life agonizing over it. Whatever happens, happens. As long as she keeps her freedom, she doesn't mind the mutations.

I had this in the honorable mentions of the last post, and I said I’d have picked it if I could’ve done more than five, so here it is, lol! I’ll leave the rest of the honorable mentions alone, tho. Anyway, TTP is a fic I’m proud of for a couple reasons, and not just because I managed to finish it. I’m really happy with the story itself, and mutations like that hit the spot for me. I’m a real sucker for people embracing their otherness, no matter how monstrous it might be. It was a fun story to write, and it’s earned its place as one of my favorites. 

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Haunted — Little Nightmares 

“What was your nightmare about?” Mono asked curiously. He was little more than a shadowy silhouette in the dark, but she could pick out the shine of his eyes from the rest of him. “The hospital?” “No,” she said. “It was the Hunter. From before you freed me.” (Before Mono came, there was Six and the Hunter. Sometimes, there was a locked door between them. Sometimes, there wasn’t.)

I know I included the whole series this fic came from in the last top five list, but I can’t help singling this one out. I’ve gone back and reread this one many times since I wrote it, and I’m so happy with and proud of the way it came out. It can be a little nerve-wracking sometimes to insert a character’s backstory of your own creation, especially when dealing with such heavy topics as this one did. But I love it, and I’ve gotten some truly wonderful comments about it, so it’s a favorite of mine.

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A Hole in His Heart (And Also the Wall) — Five Nights at Freddy’s

Funny enough, he noticed the four wet floor sign bots first, surrounding what his brain first said was a pile of scrap. But the heap of filthy metal and plastic had a very particular shape, a recognizable one. Gregory’s mouth dropped open. And then he turned and scrambled back to the vent. (A "Gregory finds Bonnie" fic, featuring Freddy handling the news suuuper normally.)

This was such a fun one to write, and it’s one of my favorites just for Freddy smashing bodily through the wall like the Kool Aid man. It’s not often I include so many characters in a one-shot, so I’m doubly happy with how the interactions all came out. 

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Miracles (And Those Who Make Them) — Bendy and the Ink Machine

“You want,” Henry said slowly, refusing to open his eyes and subject himself to the hopeful look on his friend’s face, “to make a human with the Ink Machine. Not a human toon, but a real, actual, flesh human. Why.” “I’ve been thinking—” Joey said. “Well, please stop,” Henry begged him. (An AU where everything is fine and wonderful and Henry never left. The toons have their world, the humans love to visit them, and Joey Drew has just decided he wants to add a new member to the family.)

Gosh, I need to finish this! I kinda forgot about it (oops!) back when I was sick-ish for a month, and my writing habits have been all over the place since, but I’ll get back to it eventually. Anyway, it’s a favorite because I’m super happy with the overall worldbuilding, and it’s probably one of my favorite portrayals of Henry and Joey’s relationship. Platonic soulmates who are co-parenting a child made with magic for the win! 

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Public Displays of Affection — Bendy and the Ink Machine 

Joey wasted no time dipping Henry backwards, laughing at his partner’s noise of surprise. He pulled up after achieving the reaction he’d evidently wanted, and it took only a moment for them to settle into a pose, their hands mostly where Pierre wanted them. They weren’t leaning too far back to put a strain on either of them, but it was very clearly a dip. All that remained was the kiss. “May I?” Joey murmured, nearly inaudible to anyone but his partner. And though Henry rolled his eyes, he replied, just as soft, “You may.” (Five times Henry and Joey kissed at the studio, and one time they kissed at home.)

I love the whole series this fic is part of, but this is the one I most frequently go back to reread. It hits a couple of my favorite things: outside POV, possessive behavior, a sassy character (or two or three), and a fond, nearly humorous but utterly genuine relationship. It’s also probably the most relationship-y relationship I’ve ever written, so I’m proud of that too, lol.