#there is no monogamous explanation for this

[leverage-ot3]

I deeply need everyone to know that there is no monogamous explanation for this

literally no way this is straight

[neptune-scythe]

We as a society do not talk enough about how Kaz Brekker, Dirtyhands himself, the Bastard of the Barrel, carved an entire underground tunnel from his club ... To his besties house

There is no explanation for this other than that he is king softy

Like just imagine how much money that would cost, and how much work. Like sure bro is rich as fuck but like be fr, there is no way he would do all that for crime and gang business, it's just not practical. Like take the surface roads it costs nothing and it's probably not that much slower

Like bro fr just wanted a secret short cut so he could drop in on his babes whenever he wants and never be seen by the masses

Got a reputation to uphold after all

Can't have the pigeons seeing Dirtyhands taking another trip to the Geldstraat to visit his favourite boys

[lanaevyssmoved]

im seeing a lot of complaint about halsin romance but im struggling to see a reason beyond hes poly and thats bad?

[polaroidcats]

one of my colleagues turns 29 this month and she keeps going on about how this is the LAST YEAR OF OUR TWENTIES and we have to make it count and i just.. don't want to hear that anymore. first of all, i don't think my life will stop or even change at all when i turn 30 next year. but also, I feel like the better half of my twenties has been stolen by depression and the pandemic and being a caregiver and like, I haven't felt young and carefree in so long I just can't relate to my coworker even though we're the same age and it makes me sad because I wish I could?

[yautjalover]

Please read all of this first and let me explain a few things before possibly getting heated or upset.

I want to write some trans drabbles (I think that’s what I write here is called??) but I don’t want to cause dysphoria for fellow trans folks. Dysphoria for me is merely being seen and perceived male, so I have no issue with calling my genitals by the biological terms or by “pussy”, “snatch”, “cunt”, and many others. I personally dislike other terms created to rename that particular anatomy. These new terms make me uncomfortable and so I can’t use these new terms.

It would be AWESOME if I could just grow a dick, but life sucks that way. 😅

I just don’t want to alienate readers by using these terms and making myself uncomfortable in the process, or having something come across that would trigger dysphoria. Everyone experiences dysphoria differently. I myself didn’t experience the typical “finding out I’m trans as a kid” thing, so I feel alienated anyways from the trans community in general. I come from a homophobic family so I didn’t come to terms with my own sexuality and gender until a few years ago. 😕

As for other things…like writing polyamory fics? I hate to sound polyphobic, as I simply am not. I’m a very monogamous person, so all my drabbles will feature monogamous pairings. I’ve never been into the idea of multiple partners at once. To be frank, I’ve been disappointed when ficlets and even fics turn poly or into a reverse harem and not even tag it ahead of time. 😭 I’d hate to share with this character(s) I’ve grown to like. I. Do. Not. Share. 😅

I’m sorry if you’re looking for poly fics, but I know there are blogs out there who write them! I’m sorry I can’t cater to you like others, as I try to write for many types of people. I’m also sorry to my fellow transfolks for not having anything for y’all.

I want to cater to as many people as I can, but I also have to set boundaries on what makes me comfortable. I don’t set out to step on toes intentionally. Causing personal harm is not something I intentionally want to do. I figured this would be a good explanation as to why my blog lacks in certain content.

Please don’t take this as an attack of any sort, because it’s not. I’d rather it not get twisted. I’m not that kind of person.

I realize I may lose followers for voicing my opinions. There’s now over 600 of y’all! I hope you continue to like my curated blog and writings. I really try to include as many of y’all as I can. 😭

[vivvy-an]

polyamory update: we are so fucking back

[rthko]

I used to get insecure when reading radical critiques of "born this way" narratives, but I understand it differently now. I'm reading early defenses of homosexuals that concede that their "invert" pathology is worthy of sympathy, and that straight society ought to allow them to have sex (in the right circumstances) so they don't have to be miserable. They go on to claim that while some people who commit homosexual acts are victims of their circumstances, the real perverts are ontologically straight men who commit them by choice.

If I asked every LGBT person I know, "did you choose to be queer," virtually everyone would say no. I have never, to my knowledge, met anyone who would say yes. But if I asked them if they would turn straight/cis if they could, I believe that most, including people who have gone through great hardships on account of their identities, would still say no. The phrase "gay lifestyle" is considered politically incorrect, and indeed there is no one gay lifestyle. But we have also developed culturally distinct circles associated with pleasure as a virtue, creativity, individual dignity and collective care. Many of us learned to look at the straight world not with envy but with relief that we're not part of it.

There are characteristics of our queer identities or behaviors that are a choice. I did not choose to be attracted to men, but I did choose to be promiscuous. I did not choose to be uncomfortable with "male" gender roles, but I did choose to challenge them through gender expression. An emphasis on innateness would imply that the only characteristics of my identity and behavior worth defending are those that are inevitable. It would ask why I still insist on living the way I do when my sexual desires can now just as well be satiated in a legally recognized monogamous marriage.

The subtext of this question, a choice or not a choice, is whether a person is worthy of support. Much like the elusive "gay gene," some trans advocates are searching for the definitive proof of "male brains" and "female brains" that will validate the existence of trans people once and for all. If gender becomes medically or scientifically "provable," perhaps science would then validate trans people. Or, perhaps a brain scan would determine who should or should not consider themselves trans, and create new rationalizations to misgender on "scientific" terms. We need only look back to the sexologists of the late 19th and early 20th century, often gay themselves, who developed scientific rationalizations for queer behavior in good faith only to have them reapplied to nefarious ends.

Many will insist they support LGBT people in the abstract but not the specifics of queer culture. These are the tendencies that don't have a scientific or metaphysical explanation. It is less often we hear claims that one is born to be flamboyant, promiscuous, left wing, kinky or polyamorous, so these tendencies are superfluous. There is a platonic ideal of a lesbian, a gay man, a bisexual or a trans person who follows their natural proclivities and not a step further, and you're not it. So arguments against born this way narratives are not just in defense of those who see themselves as having chosen their gender or sexuality--for what it's worth, I have not knowingly met any. It's that this is a flimsy claim to legitimacy, one that has been used against us, and one that can only be taken so far. I'm not interested in determining who is "faking it." I understand more and more that everyone's body belongs to them, and the steps they take to experience joy and mutual pleasure need no explanation.

[xoxoladyaz]

You're My Heaven, Angel (Paramedic Steve x Rockstar Eddie) - Part 2

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 (Coming Soon)

AN: I just wanted to say a quick THANK YOU to everyone who has been so kind and so supportive of Part 1! I hear you and I, too, want to create a whole series based around this idea. It's a lot of pressure following-up something that's so beloved, but I'm going to give it my best!

Robin must secretly hate Steve.

She must be the most incredible actress in the entire world. She must be the most prolific conman that’s in the business of conman-ing people or whatever. She must have made a blood oath with an elder god during a full moon that no matter how many days or weeks or months or years it took, she would one day make Steve Harrington’s life absolutely miserable. There’s no other reasonable explanation for why she insists on taking the scenic route to Eddie’s room - a scenic route which adds on two additional minutes of travel time instead of heading straight down the hallway (which maybe adds forty seconds tops). 

A route which means Steve has to bear two additional minutes of Eddie loudly introducing him to every single doctor, nurse, patient or family member that they come across on the way to his suite. Never mind that Steve’s worked with most of these doctors and nurses for years now, never mind that he actually goes to Sharla’s poker group when he has Thursdays off with the other fifty-something moms on staff (which Robin never ceases to find absolutely hilarious); no, Eddie is all smiles and arm flourishes, loudly – too loudly – proclaiming that they are now in the presence of his angel, his baby, his angel baby, the love of his life, the apple of his eye, his amor, his partner, his husband – 

“Congratulations, Steve! I didn’t know you got married!” Sue laughs as the entire production passes by. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Steve rolls his eyes. Eddie blows her a noisy kiss before clearing his throat. He takes a deep breath, and – 

“I’M GETTING MARRIED IN THE MORNING - ”

“Robin, he’s singing again!”

“I know, dingus, I can hear him.”

“DING DONG, THE BELLS ARE GONNA CHIIIIIMMMEEEEEEEE - ”

Steve turns back, risking a glare at Robin mid-step. “Remind me why we’re going the long way around?”

Robin snorts out a laugh, shit-eating grin firmly in place. “Come on, Stevie, we all need the exercise.”

“ – GET ME TO THE CHURCH ON TIMMMMMEEEE – Stevie? Stevie,” Eddie turns and sighs at Steve and okay, Steve can’t tell if Eddie’s eyes are super dilated because of the probable head trauma or if there’s a weird reflection from the fluorescents, but his eyes are, like, legit sparkling up at him. “Steeeeeevieeeee - ”

“Yep, I’m still here.” Eddie grins, flopping to the side so that their joined hands are resting up against his head. He sighs happily, his feet wiggling under the shock blanket, and it’s not cute Steve stop thinking it’s cute – 

“Steve!” He pulls his eyes away just as the gurney comes to a stop in front of Brenda, one of the intake nurses currently on shift. Brenda’s blonde and cute and ethically non-monogamous, but Steve is more of a one and done sort of guy. That doesn’t mean they don’t flirt like crazy anytime they bump into each other, though. (Hey, he’s gotta stay in shape somehow.)

“Looking good today. Is that a new shirt?” She asks with a smirk, her eyes running over his biceps. (It’s not a new shirt, Robin just ran it through the dryer, so it shrunk. Really, he should have gotten rid of it, but it makes his biceps look amazing.)

“Nah, it’s - ”

He has a line. He has a great line. But as soon as he opens his mouth to speak it, he’s cut off by a very loud hissing sound coming from his left and – 

Yep, it’s Eddie. Eddie, who’s glaring at Brenda like they’re mortal enemies. Seriously, it’s a good thing he doesn’t have laser eyes like that one superhero guy because if he did, Brenda would be at risk of getting too tan.

“MINE!” Eddie snaps at the end of his hiss and then, all while still maintaining eye contact with Brenda, he yanks Steve’s hand to his mouth and licks it. And not, like, a gentle lick that you’d get from a puppy. No, Eddie licks his hand like he’s trying to give Steve a tongue bath.

(His first instinct should be to pull away, but instead all Steve can think about it Eddie giving him an actual full body tongue bath - )

“Dude!” Steve exclaims when he does finally pull his hand away. (He hears Robin snort under her breath, clearly having caught onto the fact that his brain broke at the whole licking thing and shit, now he’s thinking about it again - )

“No, MINE!” Eddie growls, and Steve barely has a chance to wipe his hand on his pants before Eddie is grabbing it back, clutching it between both of his hands like it’s his special or something. (Special, was that the word that the guy used? The little creepy guy in that one movie? He needs to text Dustin and ask.)

“Aww, I’m glad to see you’ve finally met someone!” Brenda teases.

“Uh, yeah,” Steve replies distractedly, trying (and failing) to shake one of Eddie’s hands off of his hand because now that they’re actually at his suite, he’s going to need them. “Brenda, this is - ”

“The concussion patient from Lollapalooza, Sarah clued me in,” Brenda says, snapping her gum. “Eddie, right?”

Eddie pauses from wrestling with Steve to sniff at Brenda and honestly, as someone who spent way too much time at country clubs as a child because of his parents, Eddie has the whole I’m-better-than-you-you-poor-person-wearing-Adidas expression locked down. “That’s Mister Eddie to you, Briony.”

Briony? “Who’s Briony?”

Robin kicks the gurney forward with an eye roll and suddenly they’re moving into the suite. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it, dingus.”

Eddie finally manages to tear his eyes away from Brenda. He perks his head up at Steve and once Steve’s face is in his line of sight his expression softens, the sparkles coming back in full force. “And it’s such a pretty head, baby.”

Such a pretty head SUCH A PRETTY HEAD – 

“I’ll show you – ow, Robin, seriously?” Steve yelps at Robin’s pinch.

“Stop being horny and help me get him on the bed.”

“I’m - ”

“Don’t listen to her baby, please, please stay horny, and lose the shirt while you’re at it!” Eddie sits up and starts frantically grasping at Steve’s sleeves. “Christ almighty, these arms, arms of heaven, arms of an angel - ” 

“Steve!” Robin barks and shit, he needs to focus. He takes advantage of the fact that Eddie let go of his hand to grab at his shirt and darts down to the other end of the gurney. They lift on a count of three, placing Eddie onto the bed and kicking the wheeled cart out of the way. (Eddie makes a loud WHEEEEEEEEE sound and then immediately goes back to demanding that Steve get naked.) Sarah, who’s followed the procession the entire time, grabs the empty cart and wheels it out of the room just as Brenda steps in.

“Well then, Eddie, let’s get started on intake,” Brenda nods, bringing out her iPad. “Are you ready to answer a few questions?”

“No.”

Robin groans and steps to the side, energetically fluffing and reorganizing Eddie’s pillows so he’s seated up. Somehow Eddie is able to lean around Robin’s wide-armed movements and fix Brenda with yet another piercing glare.

Brenda shoots Steve a look before nodding her head at Eddie.

Right.

“Hey, uh, Eddie, we really need to ask you a few questions - ”

“Hand!” Eddie snaps to look at Steve and sticks his hand towards him. He wiggles his fingers a few times before making a grabby motion. “Hand!”

It’s not cute. It’s totally not cute.

Steve sighs but walks back around from the foot of the bed and places his hand gently in Eddie’s. Eddie links their fingers and squeezes tightly. “Uh, how about now, is now okay to ask a few questions?”

Huffing, Eddie looks at their fingers for a few moments before looking upwards at Steve. Their eyes meet and he grins. “Hi angel,” he lets out a pleased sigh. “I missed you.”

Don’t say it don’t say it DON’T SAY IT - 

“I missed you too, Eds.” 

FUCK.

“Awwwww, my little schmoopers are being all schmoopy-moopy!” Robin sings in her best baby voice. (That’s it, he’s eating the rest of the Chunky Monkey.)

“I’m eating the rest of the Chunky Monkey.”

“Uh, like fuck you are.”

“I'd rather have you eat me,” he hears Eddie whisper and yeah, okay, that’s one he’s just going to choose to ignore for the sake of what little sanity he has left.

“Right, okay,” he hears Brenda try to get things back on track. “About those intake questions - ”

“Oh, don’t worry Nurse Brenda,” the lilting voice of Dr. Suzie Henderson floats into the room. “I can take it from here.”

Steve turns just in time to see Suzie strut into the emergency suite. She shoots Brenda a grateful nod and Brenda, with one last wink to Steve, hands her iPad off to Suzie and heads out of the room. 

“Bye Steve!”

“Bye Brenda.”

“Yeah, bye Brittany!”

Suzie has the best laugh in the world, and she lets it fly on her walk over. “Hey Steve,” Suzie grins at him as she makes her way towards the foot of Eddie’s bed. “How are things going today?”

“Oh, good,” Steve replies quickly before turning to look at Eddie. “Eddie, this is Doctor Suzie Henderson, she’s my sister-in-law.”

Eddie slowly scooches his butt backwards so he’s sitting up more. “No, she’s our sister-in-law,” he huffs before turning and smiling at Suzie. “Hey sis!” 

“And you must be Eddie! I heard you were thinking about marrying into the family.” She lets out a quick giggle at those words but then clears her throat and throws her shoulders back. “Well, if you are serious about joining our Steve in holy – or unholy – matrimony - ”

“Fuck yeah,” he hears Eddie whisper.

“ – then I’m going to need you to answer a few questions.”

“Proceed, milady.” Eddie starts gently caressing Steve’s hand with his fingers. Steve shoots a look at Robin, who makes exaggeratedly sappy faces while glancing between Steve and their intertwined fingers.

(Forget the Chunky Monkey, he’s eating all of the ice cream they have left tonight.)

“Full name?”

“Edward Anthony Munson.”

“Age?”

“Thirty-one.”

“Name of your emergency contact?”

“Oh, that would be Uncle Wayne and Chrissy! Baby, you’re going to love Wayne,” Eddie says, turning to gaze lovingly up at Steve. “And he’s going to love you! Not as much as I love you though, that’s impossible.”

(Steve’s pretty sure that Bambi eyes here is the impossible one.)

“Great, is Wayne and Chrissy’s contact information in your medical file?”

“Uh huh,” Eddie replies dreamily, still gazing at Steve. 

“Okay, speaking of your file,” Suzie taps at her iPad, “any major events in your medical history that we should know about?”

“Hmmm?” 

He can feel it on his face, he can feel his stupid grin on his stupid face, but he chooses to instead focus on helping Eddie pay attention. “She wants to know if there’s major health events in your past that we need to know about, Bambi.”

“Bambi?”

“BAMBI?!” Robin squeaks after Eddie.

Shit shit SHIT -

“I mean - ”

“Bambi,” Eddie hums, blinking rapidly as he slumps back against his pillows. Once he's settled, he tosses his free hand across his forehead and moans happily. “He loves me. He loves me, he loves me, HE LOVES MEEEEEE - ”

Don’t blush DO NOT BLUSH BODY STOP BLUSHING

“Oh my god that was amazing, I have literally never seen you this red, you look like an actual tomato. Oh my god, I have to tell Nance, like, now.”

“Right, yes, okay Bambi,” Suzie interrupts with a snicker, “like Steve said, is there anything we need to know?”

“Well, we’re in love,” Eddie sighs, pressing a quick kiss to the top of Stevie’s hand. “I think I’m still a little high but it’s only weed, I’ve definitely stopped doing cocaine since, like, five months ago. No need to worry about that, angel,” Eddie pats the top of Steve’s hand.

“Yeah, no, I definitely won’t worry about that.” (He’s definitely going to worry about that.)

“Well, thank you for your honesty, Eddie. I’m going to take a closer look at your files once we get them just to get a better picture of your overall health before we run our tests. Now, second set of questions,” Suzie loudly taps and drags a new window on her tablet open. “What is your annual income?”

(Huh. That’s weird. Steve’s doesn't think he's ever heard any of the nurses ask that question before.)

Eddie snorts out a laugh. “God, I make so much money. A fucking stupid amount of money.”

“You have something in way of a retirement plan then?”

“Doc, I could retire for, like, the next five hundred million years.”

Susie hums as she makes a note. “Do you have anything against sharing resources with your romantic partner?”

(Okay, Steve definitely hasn't heard anyone else ask these questions before.)

“Nah!” Eddie scoffs before gently tugging on Steve’s hand to get his attention. “You’ll be the hottest trophy wife, babe. Do you have an apron? I’m going to buy you an apron.”

“And what are your feelings on children?”

“Kids? I love kids. Is he good with kids? I bet he’s good with kids,” Eddie rushes out. “Fuck, you’re going to look so hot pregnant, baby.”

Robin makes a loud barfing noise which Suzie naturally ignores. “What exactly are you looking for in a relationship?”

“Suzie - ”

“Him! My angel,” Eddie slumps to the side so he’s leaning up against Steve’s hip. “I want to wrap him up in a warm towel and keep him forever and make sweet, sweet love to him under the - ”

“OKAY, next question please,” Robin loudly cuts him off.

“So what you’re saying is you’re looking for a committed relationship with Steve,” Suzie ignores Robin's dramatics. “Are you prepared for lifelong monogamy?”

“Absolutely.”

“Suz - ”

“And you’ll work every day to be deserving of Steve?”

“For the rest of my life,” Eddie proclaims and fuck, he actually sounds serious. He actually looks serious too.

Huh.

Suzie quietly observes him for a moment before her face relaxes into a warm smile. “I believe you. Now, dealbreakers. What are your opinions on outdoor weddings? Steve gets scared in churches.”

“What?!” Eddie gasps, snapping back to Steve.

“SUZ – what, no, I’m not afraid of churches - ”

“Uh yeah you are, you said that every time you visit one you get nightmares about being sacrificed on an altar,” Robin chimes in.

“Gee, thanks, Robin.”

“Baby, baby, don’t worry, I’d never let them sacrifice you,” Eddie tries to comfort Steve, but everything that’s happened in the last thirty seconds – hell, the last thirty minutes – is starting to finally sink in and yeah, okay, there’s an obscenely hot and rich and famous rockstar telling Steve that he loves him and sure, he’s partially concussed but the joke isn’t ending, he’s acting like he’s serious and they’ve only exchanged like maybe twenty words total but he’s acting like this is actually happening and what if it actually could – 

“Shoot, we’re going to have to wrap it up here, loverboy,” Robin waylays his runaway thoughts as her beeper goes off. “We’ve got a fainter with a broken nose."

“Okay, okay.” Steve shakes his head and tries to gently extract his hand from Eddie’s grasp but Eddie lurches at the feeling of Steve moving his hands and whines, digging his finger into Steve’s hand.

“Eddie, I’m sorry, but I’ve got to get back to work.”

“But – no, angel, please,” he blubbers before turning his eyes on Steve and –

Oh.

Oh no.

They’re even bigger and shinier when he’s crying.

“I’m sorry, Bambi,” he replies totally deliberately, “but I’ve got to go finish my shift. I’ll come back when I’m done, okay?”

Eddie sniffles, rubbing his eyes with his free hand. “Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Okay,” he whimpers sadly, and – look, this joke isn't really joking anymore so if Eddie's gonna go all the way, he might as well go all the way too.

He leans forward and presses a quick kiss to the top of Eddie’s head. “Be good for Suzie, okay?” As he draws back, he glances back down at Eddie. Eddie is blinking dazedly at Steve, all glassy-eyed and rosy.

“Wow,” Eddie whispers, and while the smile that appears on his face is small, it’s the warmest one Steve has seen yet. “Whatever you say, baby.”

“Right, right.” Steve nods and then pivots, making a hasty retreat out of the room.

“Later, Bambi,” Robin sings behind him, and then she’s quick on Steve’s heels. The hall’s crowded, though, so they aren’t fast enough to escape the start of Suzie and Eddie’s conversation. 

(“So, outdoor wedding? Maybe in spring?”

“Can it be in Hobbiton?”

“Uh, it better be in Hobbiton!”)

“I’m kinda surprised to see you staking your claim already, dingus,” Robin says, thrusting the portable gurney mat into Steve’s arms as they walk. “I was worried I’d have to make you.”

“I shouldn't have done that. I mean, he’s a patient, Robin!”

“Not anymore, he’s not!” Robin gently bumps his hip. “He's not your patient anymore so now we need to start planning your next move. I mean, he’s obviously going to say yes when you ask him out, but it still needs to be smooth.”

“What – I’m Steve Harrington, I’m always smooth.”

Robin is purposely silent.

“Okay, first of all, rude,” he says after giving her plenty of time to politely agree. “Second of all, even if I did decide to make a move, there actually isn’t a guarantee he’d say yes. Even if he wasn't just doing this because he's heavily concussed, I’ve hardly talked to the guy!”

“I know, he has no idea how much of a dork you are, it’s great.”

Steve offers Robin a hand as he climbs into the ambulance. (Not without shooting her a look once they're both seated, of course because again, rude.) 

Robin shrugs Steve's frown off. “Look, dingus, I know you think that you have all these great lines or whatever - ”

“Uh, I don’t think, I do have them - ”

“ – but they’re, like, obviously lines. Whatever you say to him has to be more real. He needs to know that if he says yes, he’s going to be going on a date with a guy that has the ooiest, gooiest, squishiest little itty bitty heart!” She squeezes her hands together like she’s holding Steve’s heart in her hands (which definitely isn’t concerning given the fact that she’s technically a medical professional who knows just how vulnerable that particular organ is.)

“Robs - ”

“ITTY BITTY!” She kisses the tips of her fingers. “And that’s why we gotta plan, doinkus. Edward Anthony Munson needs to be constantly conscious of the fact that he’s dating the best guy on the entire planet because you are, Steve, you are the best guy on Earth and you deserve a Prince Charming even though the Prince Charming archetype is totally outdated and part of a patriarchal initiative to establish systematic gender dynamics - ”

Well, shucks. Maybe Robin doesn’t hate him after all.

“ - doesn't exist, its still what you deserve. But more importantly than that, if Eddie does start dating you, then I have a better shot of getting him to introduce me to Chris Hemsworth.”

“Chris Hemsworth?"

“Uh, yeah.”

"Chris Hemsworth - Chris Hemsworth? Out of every famous person Eddie could hypothetically introduce you to, you'd want to meet Chris Hemsworth?"

"Well, yeah," Robin takes a brief sip of her water before shooting Steve a playful smirk. “I mean, as great as you are, I wouldn't be opposed to upgrading my emotional support himbo.”

Never mind, she’s evil incarnate.

(And she’s going to be out of Chunky Monkey in about five hours.)

Tags list: @piratefishmama @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @noxturnallyevermore @little-trash-ghost @justforthedead89 @mmmmwaffles94 @omletlove @lostonceandneverfound @sweetwaterangel @punctualhowell @sapphirecobalt-1 @kedtheduck @lunesispunk @mrs-dr-reid @clockworkballerina @stayonmars @maya-custodios-dionach @kahri1 @renaissan-vvitch @xwildangel @sweetarts116 @musical-theatre-gay @ladylokilaufeyson5 @ellietheasexylibrarian @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @designatedgrape @steddiesoulmates @starlightshadowsworld @inmoonywetrust @hellfire--cult @singmeyoursimpsong @sleepdeprivedflower @loserhotline @m-owo-n @magpiemuseum

[autolenaphilia]

I’ve seen a lot of explanations for young queer people being so weirdly puritan, as in the no-kink-at-pride discourse, the anti-ship people working themselves into moralistic anger paroxysms over fanfic and the frequent callouts of people over harmless consensual kinks. Like people, including myself, have attributed it to the after-effects of an evangelical Christian upbringing or the related problem of the very sheltered and isolated childhoods many of these people have had. And that’s all probably true to a certain extent.

But honestly, it’s probably boils down to a simple thing: a form of queer respectability politics. All forms of queerness in cishetnormative society are seen as freakish degenerate perversion, but some are seen as worse than others. And openly disavowing other queers with weird kinks is the most common form to buy respect from normie society, and it does have some material benefits for them. It’s common to almost all forms of oppression for there to be a dynamic of asking certain sections of the oppressed to sell out other oppressed people for their own benefit. Divide and conquer. This has gone on for literally decades. The respectable monogamous cis white gay male couple who condemn those other gays who are into leather and bondage and casual sex is almost a cliché at this point.

And let’s be honest, some people in the queer community are more privileged than others and thus able to wield this kind of respectability politics against those more oppressed than them. This is why transfems are so often targeted by TME queers for callouts over harmless kinks. There is little more disgusting to the cishetnormie mind than a transfem being sexual. And so other queers are able to wield transmisogyny to build their own respectability. What all those callouts from TME queers are actually saying, if you would do a They Live glasses style analysis, is:“I’m not a degenerate perverted sex freak, but that transfem over there is, do harm to her, not me.”

Transmisogyny is so strong that the figure of the degenerate transfem can even be used to redeem previously unacceptable figures of queer sexuality. I’ve seen multiple posts that present the aforementioned leather and bondage cis gay male kinksters as wholesome in contrast with whatever evil kink they are ascribing to transfems this week. Nothing is as evil to anti-kink moralists as two trans lesbians who do fauxcest roleplay by calling themselves sisters.

And when queers deprogram themselves from cisheteronormativity, they tend to do it in very self-serving ways. They only unlearn their bigotry and disgust against varieties of queerness that apply to them. So cis gays accept that cis gay male and cis lesbian sex is fine, various TME trans people unlearn their bigotry against tme non-binary people or taking testosterone. The queer things that are part of their identity, that they are inclined to do. But basically no variety of queer listed in this paragraph have any strong incentive to unlearn their bigotry and disgust against transfems, their transmisogyny And why would they? They can use transmisogyny to their own benefit, to raise their status within the queer community and in wider society by throwing transfems to the wolves.

[solisaureus]

Everything I Hate About Rick Riordan's Interpretation of the Hunters of Artemis

I believe that Rick Riordan has good intentions and that he has done a lot to promote inclusivity in YA fantasy, both at a fictional representation level and at a level of authorial diversity. However, he has fumbled the ball numerous times in his writing, and my biggest complaint against him is his handling of the Hunters of Artemis. So I wrote an essay on everything I hate about it.

Part I: Mythological context

Artemis is the ancient Greek goddess of the hunt, nature, unwed maidens, animals, archery, childbirth, and other domains. She is known for keeping a company of nymphs and inhabiting the wilderness with them, giving rise to Riordan’s concept of the Hunters of Artemis.

Artemis is also famous for being a virgin goddess, vowing never to marry. The concepts of virginity and marriage in ancient times and the understanding we have of them today are quite different. Here is an excerpt describing Artemis (and Athena’s) status as virgin goddesses from Goddesses, Whores, Wives, and Slaves: Women in Classical Antiquity by Sarah Pomeroy:

“The Artemis of classical Greece probably evolved from the concept of a primitive mother goddess, and both she and her sister Athena were considered virgins because they had never submitted to a monogamous marriage. Rather, as befits mother goddesses, they had enjoyed many consorts. Their failure to marry, however, was misinterpreted as virginity by succeeding generations of men who connected loss of virginity only with conventional marriage. Either way, as mother goddess or as virgin, Artemis retains control over herself; her lack of permanent connection to a male figure in a monogamous relationship is the keystone of her independence.”

Note how this differs from modern Western concepts of marriage and virginity. Marriage, for a woman of antiquity, means a monogamous, submissive union with a man. A virgin, in the context of Artemis and her Hunters, is an unmarried, independent woman, not a woman who does not desire sex or romantic love. It is likely that Riordan, as a classics scholar, knows this.

Artemis was known to keep companions in the myths, both men and women. Orion is the most famous male companion of Artemis, and in some iterations of the myth he is a lover of Artemis. Another notable figure is the nymph Callisto, who was exiled from the Hunters after Zeus raped and impregnated her in Hesiod’s Astronomia. (According to Hyginus’s recounting of this story, Zeus seduced Callisto by disguising himself as Artemis, insinuating that Callisto and Artemis had been lovers). I assume this is where Riordan got the idea that becoming “smitten with boys” (The Titan’s Curse, p. 38) gets you kicked out of the Hunters.

Another known devotee to Artemis was Hippolytus. In the play Hippolytus by Euripides, the eponymous character (the son of Theseus with the Amazon Hippolyta), was enamored with the hunt and had no desire for marriage, worshipping Artemis as his patron. His disinterest in romance offended Aphrodite, and she cursed Theseus’s wife Phaedra to fall in love with Hippolytus. The rest of the play does not end well for either of them, but the important thing is that ancient Greek plays did acknowledge unmarried male devotees of Artemis. This, combined with the myth of Orion, confounds Riordan’s choice to interpret the Hunters as exclusively female.

Part II: Feminist separatism

So, given the existence of Orion and Hippolytus, where does the anti-men thing come from? One possible explanation is the story of Actaeon, who spied on Artemis while she was bathing, and was harshly punished for his indecency when Artemis transformed him into a deer and set his hunting dogs on him. But mythologically, the Hunters were not exclusive to women, and in a modern context, I think Riordan’s interpretation of them as such is inappropriate and irresponsible.

In the 1970s, there was a movement to form communities of exclusively lesbians who seek to escape patriarchal society by forming insular colonies, known as lesbian separatism. On a surface level, it might seem empowering — many lesbians and other women seek to escape the male gaze and heteronormative expectations, and making their own exclusive all-female social communities may seem like a utopian escape. But this movement was notoriously transphobic, with these lesbian separatist communities explicitly rejecting transgender women and relying on gender bioessentialism to determine who was “really” a woman or a lesbian. It was gatekeeping in its most radical form (Separatism by Andrew Matzner).

So for Riordan’s Hunters to model feminist separatism (except with celibate women instead of lesbians) is a similar TERF trap. It is never clarified in canon whether the female requirement for membership includes either closeted or out transgender women, or if the Hunters expel transgender men who come out after joining the Hunters. Given that the Hunters — a community of people who seek to reject conventional patriarchal society — would likely appeal to queer people of all ages, genders, and sexual identities, why is it exclusive to adolescent celibate girls?

Part III: Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

In The Dark Prophecy, Riordan supplements the lore of his Hunters with a bombshell: female Hunters who fall in love with each other are expelled for breaking their oath of virginity. Emmie, who is Hemithea of ancient myth and had been a part of the Hunters for millennia, was excommunicated with her lover Jo, and they form a new life together in Indianapolis. This is described as a voluntary, heartwarming departure and a show of the two women’s commitment to each other.

The positive spin that Riordan puts on this story is shocking, considering the fact of the matter is that these characters were forced to choose between their family and their queer love. Losing one’s family, especially one that had been Emmie’s whole life for literal ages, as a result of coming out is a homophobic tragedy any way you look at it. How are we supposed to think positively of Artemis or the Hunters after seeing them cast out their own because of their lesbian relationship? Especially when LGBTQ homelessness as a result of this exact trauma is such a prominent problem?

Hell, in The Sun and the Star, Nico di Angelo expresses that his worst fear in coming out as gay was to be abandoned by his friends or ostracized by his community (p. 216, 219). Yet this is exactly what happened to Emmie and Jo when they came out in the Hunters. The fact that this outcome is acknowledged as terrifying and traumatic in The Sun and the Star makes it baffling that it’s framed as congenial and unavoidable in another Riordan book.

The fact that the Hunters are a militant force makes the expulsion of lesbians reminiscent of another notable LGBTQ rights issue: Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (DADT). This American legislation, which was in effect from 1994 to 2011, prohibited openly gay, bisexual, or lesbian individuals from serving in the armed forces. It was acceptable to be closeted while serving, but disclosing one’s identity as lesbian, gay, or bisexual resulted in being discharged. The repeal of DADT in 2011 was seen as a major victory for LGBTQ rights in America…which makes it concerning that Riordan would implement the same policy for his fictional militia in a book that was published in 2017. And then portray it as positive and empowering.

Riordan doubling down on the “no romance allowed” aspect of his iteration of the Hunters by excluding lesbians from membership is a bizarre commitment to his misconstrued translation of the ancient Greek concept of virginity. Remember that Artemis’s vow of virginity was a commitment to independence and a rejection of marital submission to a man in a patriarchal society, not a condemnation of romance and sexuality. By this definition, virgins include lesbians, and it is ridiculous to construe two women’s romantic commitment to each other as violating the oath of virginity. Riordan’s choice to vilify lesbians in the Hunters was his choice, not an appropriate application of mythology. Considering that Artemis has been used as a relatable cultural icon for modern lesbians, this seems especially insidious.

Part IV: Asexual misrepresentation

Asexuality is a spectrum of queer identities which describe those that experience little to no sexual attraction to other people of any gender. Aromanticism is a related spectrum of queer identities entailing little to no romantic attraction or interest in other people of any gender. There is a very broad range of asexual and aromantic experiences, including those that overlap with other queer experiences, including lesbianism. Asexuality is not the same thing celibacy and aromanticism is not the same thing as being single. Rick Riordan does not seem to grasp this, construing his anti-romance portrayal of the Hunters as a haven for aromantic and/or asexual girls such as Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano.

While a community like the Hunters, with its emphasis on rejecting patriarchal, heteronormative standards, would certainly appeal to many aromantic and/or asexual individuals (as well as most other queer people), there are several issues with conflating the lifestyle of Riordan’s Hunters with asexuality/aromanticism.

First, the Hunters in this setting are exclusively young girls, with the oldest being Thalia Grace, who is 15. Feeding into the stereotype that asexual/aromantic people are immature and childish is hardly positive representation. Second, requisite celibacy is not the same thing as natural asexuality. In fact, I find the whole enforced celibacy, anti-romance thing weirdly Catholic and repressive for a group of people devoted to a Pagan goddess of nature and unconventional independence.

I will iterate it again, this is a reductive, ill-fitting application of the ancient concept of virginity that is associated with Artemis. It is valid for modern asexuals and aromantics to admire and relate to the mythology of Artemis, but Riordan’s misapplication of this association does a disservice to asexuals, aromantics, and queer community as a whole. Riordan’s Hunters feed the harmful, incorrect stereotype that asexuals and aromantics look down on all forms of romantic/sexual love (including queer love) and see themselves as superior to the culture of love and sex. This is not positive aromantic/asexual representation.

Part V: Alternative interpretations

With all of this said, the Hunters serve an important narrative role in Riordan’s stories and a lot of potential as an alternative life path for demigods. Abolishing the Hunters would do the story and its setting a disservice; but I believe they should’ve been written very differently.

The Hunters should maintain their core purpose of an uprooted existence, rejecting conventional society to connect with nature. They should provide community for those who are not served by the heteronormative, cisnormative patriarchy. This would include people of all ages, genders, and romantic/sexual identities. There should be an emphasis on solidarity among marginalized sexual and gender identities instead of overt hostility and gatekeeping.

Members of the Hunters should be discharged only when they decide to rejoin mainstream society or settle down with a lifestyle that is incompatible with the aforementioned purpose of the Hunters. I believe this structure would be far more empowering and liberating than what Riordan has envisioned.

[hauntingwriteblr]

The Worst Part of Loving You (Sumeru Guys)

A/N: weeeee back in angst hours friends🎉🎉

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tighnari won't call you his or let you call him yours. You've been flirting back and forth for a while and he's more affectionate with you than anyone else, letting you get closer than any friend would. And yet, that's all he ever calls you. You've never heard him refer to you as more, even though you both act like it. What you don't hear is his conversations with Cyno when no one else is around, those nights when he expresses his true fear is overwhelming you. He is fully aware of his monogamous nature as a fennec fox and the moment he allows that dam to break, he won't be able to let you go, regardless of what either of you want. He can't- no, he won't make that choice for you, so he pulls as far back as he can let himself, not realizing how this borderline behavior is hurting you more.

Cyno doesn't want you to hide anything from him. Of course he understands you have a right to privacy and he respects your boundaries, but he also knows about the wary looks he receives from everyone else. Ever since he became the General Mahamatra, he has caused unease and secretiveness in those around him, and he couldn't stand for you to see him the same way. You shouldn't fear him, you shouldn't have to hide anything from your partner, so he tries to know everything he can. He always asks about your day, and follows up on his follow up questions, until it almost feels like an interrogation. If you hesitate to answer, he urges you to continue, wanting you to feel safe and heard, yet his pursuit of honesty may cause the very anxiety he is trying to prevent.

Kaveh is perfect, too perfect. The Light of the Ksharewar and genius architect behind the Palace of Alcazarzaray has a reputation to live up to after all. What kind of man would he be if he couldn't make his most beloved happy? He works so much harder than before, both to earn the money to spoil you(even if you insist you don't need it) and to make sure you never see... the less likable sides of himself. Can't have you worrying about him after all. He's not stressed about work, and no, his living situation doesn't bother him a bit! Not a trace of exhaustion or self-doubt to be found here! After all, what could ever concern him when he has you?

Alhaitham is single-minded. It's one of the traits you admired most in him in fact. The day he decided to pursue you, no distraction or obstacle could dissuade him until he was yours. These days however, you feel like less of a goal and more of an obligation. Everything has it's place in his life, and now that wooing you is no longer a priority, he's shifted focus to other things. Anytime you try to see him outside of your scheduled date nights, he brushes you off with explanations of being busy. Of course, he still spends time with you and is never late to or forgetful of your dates, so what's the issue? What's making your heart ache at the thought of him?

[jadagul]

I started wondering how the Greeks and Romans developed monogamy norms, in contrast to the harem systems you see in e.g. classical China. And I did some random googling and I have not learned anything I consider super reasonable but I did discover this marvelous abstract by Mara Squicciarini and Jo Swinnen:

Intriguingly, across the world the main social groups which practice polygyny do not consume alcohol. We investigate whether there is a correlation between alcohol consumption and polygynous/monogamous arrangements, both over time and across cultures. Historically, we find a correlation between the shift from polygyny to monogamy and the growth of alcohol consumption. Cross-culturally we also find that monogamous societies consume more alcohol than polygynous societies in the preindustrial world. We provide a series of possible explanations to explain the positive correlation between monogamy and alcohol consumption over time and across societies.

A working paper circulated to the American Association of Wine Economists, so you know it's legit.

[ae-neon]

Nesta Vs ACOSF, a rambling rant

TW: mentions of sexual assault and abuse

Besides the "love" story that read like a quiet descent into domestic horror, ACOSF has one element that keeps me from being able to pick it up even just to sift through for Nesta gems: sex.

Here me out, I'm not a prude and I think we could have gotten a smutty romance but...

At her core, Nesta has always been a proud and modest person.

To be clear, with pride, I mean that her sense of self - her famous steel spine - has kept her together and unbroken even during harrowing circumstances. It's vital to her. It's so ingrained in her that - given we have no other explanation - we can assume it's what shields her mind from literal magic. However, like any trait, her pride can also be a thing that comes off as negative in the wrong situations.

With modesty, she was raised to keep a certain ideology that based her value on sex, beauty, marriage etc but it's important to understand that Nesta applied those standards inwards, at herself. (Eg In acotar, she brings up Feyre and Isaac in defence of her and Tomas, in acomaf, she is mostly upset about not hearing from Feyre or being notified that Feyre has switched courts - not about Feyre sleeping with Tamlin and then Rhys)

Now, I don't think Nesta's modesty makes her better than Feyre, in fact I was happy to get the representation of two different types of views on sex

But what I didn't consider at the time was that SJM was painting this out to be a negative trait.

In retrospect it seems obvious even though Nesta has defied her narrative destiny and become a sort of icon, at the end of the day she was still supposed to be written in a negative contrast to Feyre.

It seems funny but imagine you consumed the book the way Sarah intended, the way so many in the fandom have. The old Sarah Says rule, for my long time mutuals.

For example:

The dinner in acomaf - it's obvious Nesta is upset that she hasn't heard from Feyre only to have her come through not only as a whole Fae but bringing others and endangering their entire family.

But imagine it as a one dimensional reading and suddenly the "I fuck" dialogue is a girlboss moment of feminism giving a fuck you to the strict patriarchy of the "mortal lands" let's ignore how the Fae are actually more patriarchal and the Illyrians even more so than that

So understand that Nesta's modesty is being directly contrasted with Feyre's sexual freedom. The reader - at least from sjm's perspective - is supposed to agree with Feyre and disagree with Nesta in a sort of win/lose, yes/no, black/white dichotomy.

And because sjm is consistent and boring and a self-inset author, this dynamic doesn't change even when the protagonist does.

Only now sjm and her feminism has changed from fuck-whoever-I-want girlboss to kinky-but-only-with-my-husband tradwife

So Nesta can't be prudish and cut off because 1) it's not as conducive to the breakdown of self and buildup of a dependent and abusive relationship and 2) it's not in direct contrast with Feyre's current monogamous, traditional family values character.

So Nesta starts drinking and sleeping around and it's not because we're going to explore the unraveling of the pride and modesty at the core of the character as part of her transformation or as a result of her trauma

But because it's supposed to be a bad look, degrading, it shows she's failed, it makes her a loser

All of that is already insane. And even more so when taken with the context of her assault by Tomas and the sex centred relationship she has with Cassian

Now add to that the fact that in the book, Nesta is an object of desire for 2 villains and undergoes assault and drowning AGAIN

Sjm literally gives less than 2 fucks about SA, that much is obvious even from the way she inflicts and then disregards the experience of both Feyre and Rhysand respectively. It's a tool for her, a quirky story element

But to have Nesta experience such a similar thing - especially when the experience of being Made can be read as a sort of rape allegory on its own - and all for the sake of "romance" fantasy??

Even Nesta's reading habits are sexualised, to be clear I don't think there's anything wrong with reading smut, but the scope of her intellect and reading is narrowed down when we're suddenly made to believe most of the books she reads are smut.

This is someone who likely taught herself economics and investment within months in order to not just pay off the debt, upgrade her whole family's way of life but also rebuild the family fortune. Someone who, having stopped schooling at around 14/15, did the math needed to calculate the feasibility of the evacuation of a small country.

Someone who's verbally stated life goal was to see what a woman could make of herself in the world.

Even her love of reading is used as a stepping stone for how horny she is, instead of it being a result of her deeply ingrained need for escapism

She reads smut because the only thing she has in common with Cassian and the IC is sex. Because sjm thought one of the core elements of a friendship between 2 SA survivors and a disabled woman from a culture that mutilated her for being born a woman would be their desire to fantasise about men.

All the while the male love interest treats her like garbage.

We could have had a smutty book filled with sex where each scene could have been the growth of Nesta's trust and love of Cassian through intimacy. It could have been a sexual relationship that involved and explored kink - which explored vulnerability and the negative impact of how Nesta's pride became a source of stress and strain.

It could have been an exploration about the complicated relationship with desire and oppressors that many survivors have. But it isn't.

It's hahaha horny, so RELATABLE

Even when it comes to the abusive situation Nesta grew up in, it's just hung up like decoration on the character. Not explored, let alone healed. I don't wanna hear that sjm explained or explored Nesta's abuse when we don't even get her mother or her grandmother's names

We don't get

The complexity of being a trapped and abused woman who came from a trapped and abused woman who came from a trapped and abused woman

Or the complexity of a dysfunctional family

Or even the journey of recovery from addiction and self-harming behaviour

Now, not every aspect of Nesta or any survivors lives have to boil down to how it relates to their experiences but SJM is praised for her "recovery" and so much of this book is about sex and abuse but has no depth

It could have been a less-deep, fun experience of sex and desire and kink. But no

Nesta has sex with many faceless men because sjm is condemning her as a failure. Sex is her punishment, it makes her dirty and unworthy and cheap.

Then, through her "healing", she becomes a sex doll for the right guy. Sex is her reward, it makes her hot and useful and appealing.

Sjm writes not just like a man but like a particularly talented misogynist so it's the way sex is used that really puts me off

Edit: ultimately I think the sex and romance should have interacted with and evolved her pride, modesty and past experiences, rather than those things being demolished to turn her into a sex doll

[tending-the-hearth]

watching “mom city” and losing my entire mind over the entire rjk subplot how was this supposed to be interpreted as just two friends supporting their other friend

the entire boot room scene with roy's lil nod to jamie before he just collapses against him

roy and keeley scheming to find out what's going on with jamie

jamie being all soft towards keeley when she shows up at his hotel room

keeley??? linking arms??? with both of them???? as they're leaving georgie's house???? excuse me???

the end mini celebration with rjk with them being touchy with each other and teasing each other???

there is literally no monogamous explanation for the rjk interactions

this??? was supposed to be interpreted as platonic????

[extremesocialoutcast]

There is no monogamous, nor heterosexual explanation for this scene

[bangtanmix73]

Hi! This is my first time requesting anything! Can I request a Twilight fic where the reader is a female Quileute shifter, and some from the pack react to their physical changes after shifting?

Like maybe pre-shift, they start off shorter, maybe a bit chubbier or even scrawny but after they disappear for a while to go through the shifting process, they come back, and they've grown much taller and more toned and muscular like the rest of the pack.

I kinda want to focus on Leah, Paul, Embry, or Seth's reactions in maybe a headcanon form in monogamous relationships. Maybe they imprinted on the reader before the shift but weren't allowed to see them as they were having a really tough time with all the major physical changes.

Any of them are fine, whichever one or ones you feel most comfortable with. If you can do all or some of them, that's great, if you can only do one, that's cool too! Writing is time consuming and if you can't or won't write for 4 characters, I understand!

I apologize if this is too specific, but I've had this idea for such a long time! I love your work and hope you can figure out a way to write my kinda strange request! Don't feel pressured to write this quickly, I know you'll do great!

Characters: Seth, Leah, Paul and Embry

Note: I am slow at writing so bare with me here. I don’t really like this so I might go back and fix this later. Also this is fem!reader as requested :).

Warnings: slight cursing, mentions of homophobia, my writing, this happened in the storylines of Twilight, fear of rejection.

Embry 

You were friends with Jacob, Embry, and Quil before they shifted. Quil never stopped contact with you, though was very little.  

You ended up running into them in the woods, they were shirtless, they didn’t do that before. You stormed up to them, demanding an explanation.  

Once he made eye contact with you, he froze. The Earth was ripped from him, gravity wasn’t what was keeping him here, it was her.  

You started shaking like you were about to shift. Quil forced Embry, despite him just imprinting, and Jacob to go get Sam. Embry wanted to protest, but he needed time to process what just happened. 

It was a few days before he saw you again. Poor boy was anxious the whole time. Sam brought you to officially meet the whole pack. 

When you walked in, he felt like he lost his breath. You were still you yet...different. 

You were taller than before; you were more toned and muscular like the rest of them. 

You were still pissed at the trio, but you understood why they avoided you now. To make the situation worse, or better, depends on how you see it, you made eye contact with Embry. You froze, the Earth was ripped from you, gravity wasn’t what was keeping you here, it was him. You were beyond confused on why you felt this way. You made eye contact with the rest of the pack, nothing. Why just Embry? 

“I suppose you and Embry should take a walk.” Even though Sam was alpha, he wanted to leave the imprint talk between the two wolves. 

Embry took your hand, walking you out of Emily’s house. You allowed him to drag you into the woods. You were walking for 15 minutes before you got fed up, yanking your hand back from his. 

“Are you going to explain what the fuck happened back there?” You demanded answers. You wanted to know why you felt like that when you made eye contact with just him. 

Embry turned to you and sighed. “Don’t freak out, ok?” 

“I’ll try.” You crossed your arms over your chest. 

“What happened when you made eye contact with me back at Emily’s is called imprinting.” He paused. You nodded him to continue. “Imprinting is like when you see them, they’re all that matters. It’s no longer gravity, they are the only one keeping you here. You’d do anything for them, their happiness, their safety. It doesn’t have to be a romantic relationship. It can be a brother, a best friend, a protector or something more. She’s you. For you, it’s me. I imprinted back when you stormed up to us in the woods.” 

You stood silent for a minute, letting it all sink in. “What do we do now?” 

“Well, if you don’t want it, we can reject the bond and move on.” You felt a pang of sadness at the mention of rejecting the bond, you knew he felt it too. 

“No, I don’t want to reject it. I don’t know what I want exactly, but we’ll figure it out along the way.” 

Leah

Now, Leah had a hard time in general, her boyfriend leaving her for her cousin, the shift, her father's death, she couldn’t get a break. The last thing she expected was to imprint, and she definitely wasn’t expecting a woman.

You come over to Emily’s often to visit your brother, Jared. Despite visiting often, Leah never once made eye contact with you. She didn’t know why you wouldn’t look at her, but you did. You had a crush on her. You didn’t want to make it obvious because you scared what your brother thought. You just didn’t know you were horrible at hiding, well to everyone, but Leah.

Jared wasn’t happy about your little crush and he definitely wasn’t happy when Leah imprinted on you. It wasn’t homophobia, it was just you were his sister and he didn’t want you dragged into this world more than you already were. Boy, was he in for a big surprise.

Today, you decided to visit the pack. When you showed up, they were being unnecessarily mean to Leah. Quite frankly, you were fed up.

“What are your problems? As far as I know, she hasn’t done anything to deserve you being assholes to her.” The pack went quiet. “So, you bully her for no reason?” No response. “Idiots,” you mumbled.

Leah snickered at your comment. You looked at her, making eye contact. She froze, looking shocked. You look away, blushing. All of a sudden, your brother shot up from his seat.

“Oh, hell no,” he exclaimed. “I know that did NOT just happen.”

“What?” You looked between Leah and Jared. “What’s wrong?”

Jared stormed up to Leah. “You imprinted on my sister?!” Leah looked like she was struggling to get words out.

“You know we can’t control it, Jared. I’m just as shocked as you are.” She tried reasoning with your brother.

“Would someone tell me what’s going on?! What’s an imprint?!” You started shaking, not because of anger, you were stressed. It was obvious whatever Jared was upset about had something to do with you.

“Sam, she’s shaking!” Quil called out.

“Is she going to shift?” Seth questioned, slightly panicked.

“Leah, get her out of here.” Sam ordered. Jared was about to argue before Sam shut him down. “She’s her imprint, Leah is better off helping her.”

Jared let Leah help you, but not without complaining.

You ended up imprinting on her as well.

Once you were able to shift back, Leah saw how different you looked, more toned and taller, like her. She wasn’t going to deny it, she was into you.

She explained everything to you. The shifting, the imprinting, and what it meant for you.

You accepted the imprint, and gave her the world she deserves.

Seth

You were the new girl at school, well, new-ish. You moved out when you were young, but you still struggling as you remember no one. You were having a hard time with the new school, no friends, and overall, new environment.

Seth just wanted to help the new girl out, he didn’t expect to imprint.

After talking with the pack, he decided the best way was to ease you into everything, but nothing goes as planned.

You ended up shifting at the end of your second week on the reservation. Poor baby Seth didn’t even know until Sam, Paul, and Jared came back from patrol with you.

By time Sam, Jared and Paul came back with you, it was only Seth, Leah, Emily, Quil and Embry there. Who knows where Jacob is.  As they walked in Emily’s house, everyone there glanced up with greetings then went back to what they were doing before.

“Are you boys hungry?” Emily questioned before she turned, spotting a new figure. “Who's this?”

Everyone looked up at you, making you shrink back into yourself from the unwanted attention. “That’s Y/N. She just shifted,” Sam answered as he made a bee-line towards Emily. She smiled as Sam kissed her.

Pulling away from Sam, Emily’s eyes immediately met yours. “Hi, I’m Emily, Sam’s fiancé.” She pulled away from Sam, placing chicken on a plate, setting it down on the table. “Sit, you must be hungry.” She gestured to the only seat left opened.

You took it with a small “thank you.” You sat next to Seth, feeling relieved to at least recognize someone.

Meanwhile, Seth was struggling not to make eye contact with you. He didn’t want the weight of the imprint bond put on you. Moreover, he feared rejection and the pain that came with it.

He noticed how different you looked after the shift. You were taller, tall as or taller than his sister. You were more toned and muscular. He never stared long, he felt like he was being a creep by staring.

You loosened up around the pack fairly quickly. You even got close with Leah, but Seth barely looked at you despite helping you the first couple of weeks you moved back.

One day, before patrol, you cornered him.

“Is there something wrong with me?” You demanded. You wanted answers and you wanted them now.

“No-”

“Then why won’t you look at me?” You interrupted. You knew you were being rude and hard on the sweet boy, but it was stressing you. Seth didn’t bother responding, he knew if he got it done and over with, you’d know and get the rejection over with.

When Seth made eye contact with you, making you freeze. When you snapped out of it, you wondered “what was that?”

He took a deep breath, “You imprinted on me. Imprinting is like when you see them, they’re all that matters. It’s no longer gravity, they are the only one keeping you here. You’d do anything for them, their happiness, their safety. It doesn’t have to be a romantic relationship. It can be a brother, a best friend, a protector or something...else. I’ve already imprinted. You don’t have to accept the bond; I don’t want to force you into anything.”

You went silent for a couple minutes. He thought you were trying to find a way to let him down easy. You weren’t, you were just trying to process what he just said.

“It’s alright if you don’t want to accept.”

You shook your head, instantly dismissing his worry about your refusal. “No, I think I want to try this out.”  

You swore you have never seen someone with a smile as big as his in that moment. He suddenly pulled you in a hug, but was welcome nonetheless.

Paul

You were friends with Embry, Jacob, and Quil before they shifted. When Embry and Jacob disappeared, they kept little contact with you, but hey, it was something.

Every time you talked, they hinted at what they were. You were their best friend, they wanted you to know. What they didn’t know is you caught on pretty quickly to what they were, you just never said anything as it wasn’t your business.

You met Bella through Jacob while they were repairing the motorcycles together. When Jacob disappeared, she confided in you. She dragged you everywhere with her. This time, she dragged you to confront Jacob about what he was.

Jacob was asleep by time you got to his house, but Bella saw the rest of the pack outside and decided to confront them instead. Which led to where you currently were.

“What did you do?!” Bella stormed towards Sam, clearly on a mission here. You were only a step behind her.

“What did you do to him?” She shoved into Sam. There was a chorus of “Bella, stop”, “watch out”, and “easy”.

“He didn’t want this.” You stopped next to her, standing in between her and Sam, slightly.

“What did we do? What did he do? What did he tell you?” Judging by what Embry and Jacob told you, that was Paul and the shorter one next to him was Jared.

“Both of you calm down,” Sam tried calming the situation.

“He tells me or Y/N nothing because he’s scared of you!” Paul and Jared started laughing at this. Paul looked at you, making eye contact. His smile faltered. You barely caught it before Bella punched him.

“Bella!” You reprimanded her. Paul started breathing heavily. You had a bad feeling about this.

“I think we should move,” you tried tugging her out of the way.

“Bella, Y/N, get back!” You moved to the side, closer to Embry. “Paul, calm down.”

Then it happened.

He shifted.

Out of shock, you tripped over your feet and fell backwards. Embry came up behind you, pulling you out of the way.  

Everything was a blur, it was confusing. First, you were shaking, then you had paws? Were you a wolf?! Now, you were scared and confused.

Paul, in wolf form, trotted over to you, nosing you, completely forgetting about Bella. ‘Are you alright?’ his voice sounded like it was in your head.

‘What the fuck? Why is your voice in my head?’

‘We have a mind-link when we are in our wolf form,’ Paul responded. You looked up at him, freezing like he did just moments before.

Paul took you into the woods where he came from with the pack (minus Jacob). He taught you to shift back. Jacob gave you clothes beforehand.  

Yes, Paul turned as you changed because he’s a gentleman.

But clothes didn’t stop him from seeing the difference between you now and you before. Being a gentleman certainly didn’t stop him from complimenting you, we are talking about Paul here.

He, then, sat you down on the ground to explain everything, well, most things. He was shocked you know the majority about shifting and wolves.

When he explained imprinting, you were a bit tentative about the whole thing. You suggested going slow with the imprint thing, but you accepted it nonetheless.