#there's a chance he's still semi concious too

[sisaloofafump]

Wrong.

[yuyu1024]

Rebound

Pairings: s.coups/seungcheol × y/n

Genre/tags: friends/fwb

Warning: 🔞smut, a little fluff, cursing, semi public, dry humping, handjob, oral (m/f receiving), unprotected sex/drunk sex, mention of alcohol

(Always be safe and make sure to have consent... always...)

~~~~[lmk if i miss anything]

Words: 2.5k

Disclaimer:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

A/N: this might be all over the place since i wrote it while im trying to sleep🫠 Hope you all have a great week ahead....

Brb. 👩🏻‍💻

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You are heart broken right now. Your boyfriend or should we say ex just broke up with you recently. Through text and you haven't gotten the chance to get a grip of it yet. The breakup is still fresh and the way he just dumped you is still painful. He's heartless for doing such thing. No one should ever experience such thing!

"I hate men." You blurt out as you lay down on the mat that you and your friend put down the floor so you guys could lay down whilst star gazing. Of course with alcohol and snacks involve.

"All of a sudden?" Seungcheol heard you as he was just about to come out of his house. "I invited you here at my place... to relax... to entertain you.. for you to stop crying over your ex... then... now you hate men? Even me?" He sound offended

You laugh at his reaction. "Sorry... I can't help it." You say, "Men invades women's lives... flirt with us, make us fall in lovd... then when they feel like they need to go to the next target they'll just throw us like we are nothing..."

"You are not wrong with that... but hey not all men are like that." He sits down next to you, holding a beer on his hand. "Look at me..." he adds

You get up and sit straight next to him, "Yeah... you're a nice person..." you lean your head on his shoulder. "Too nice... even... that's why---"

"Hey. Don't mention the past." He hushes you. "We are talking about your heart break here... not mine that's been years ago."

You giggle at his reaction. "Fine..." you then grab his beer and drink from it. "But just one question.."

"Hmm?"

"Why haven't you dated again after....you know who...?"

"Well... I don't know... I guess... I just haven't found the girl for me yet..."

"Why? Are your standards that high?"

He takes back the beer from your hand. "I'm not like that... I go with my feelings... not like you who goes nuts when you see men with strong arms and built."

"Well," you steal his beer again and drink from it. "I find those traits sexy...how can I resist?"

"Yeah right." He takes his beer again. "Will you stop drinking mine? Just grab one from the cooler... I bought enough for the two of us..."

"But I like yours..." you take it again from him after he just took a sip. "We can always share... we are friends..." You drink the last chug. "Why? Does it bother you?"

"It doesn't. I just thought you'd be the type of person that would be concious about drinking at the same cup or whatever..."

You wipe your mouth with your hand as you put the empty can on the side. "What do you mean?"

"You know... I hear girls at Uni talk about indirect kisses so..."

"Ahh... I see..." you giggle. "How funny... they get so excited by those..."

"You don't?"

"Of course not! It's not like it is a kiss." You roll your eyes. "Making out for sure...is much more exciting..."

"Right." Seungcheol gets up to take another can of beer from the cooler. "Do you want one or you still want to share with me?" He asks as he opens the cooler.

"Grab two... but still we'll share." You say smiling

He shakes head and grab two different kinds. "You are really something..."

***

After a few more drinks and chitchat about your exes, you two finally decided to lay down and watch the stars above you.

With minimal light around you and Seungcheol turning off the lights in the house, just leaving the kitchen lights on where you two will enter back later, the sky is more brighter and clearer in your view.

"Thanks for inviting me here at your family's vacation house..."

"No problem... besides, mom suggested me to bring you here... she said you need this."

"Your mom is so sweet."

"She is... and its a plus because she likes you..."

"Really?"

"Yeah, she always wanted a daughter and I guess....you fit what she dreamed off having..."

"Aww... but...it is a bit sad..."

"Sad? Why?"

You turn over to your side, facing Seungcheol. "Coz I'm not the typical good daughter... and I don't want to disappoint her..."

"Typical good daughter?" He repeats, stunned by your word choice. "You are a good person..."

"Am I?" You laugh and lay down at your back again.

"Yeah... just a little freaky..."

"Freaky?!" You repeat, whipping your head to him. "What do you mean by that?"

"Don't act like you are not..." he smirks, "I've seen you do PDA with your ex."

"And...?" You toss to your side again but this time closer to Seungcheol. "Are you saying I'm freaky because I like to cuddle and touch my man?" You raise your brow at him.

"Don't get insulted. I didn't meant it as a bad way...." he then looks back at you, smiling. "I like freaky to you know... we all have our... kinks..."

"Really? Define... what's freaky for you? What are your kinks?"

"Okay... don't look at me like that..." he laughs, "I don't mean THAT kink... I don't do fifty shades of grey freaky you know..."

"Then... what are the things you like?"

"You really want to know?"

"Of course... coz my freaky may be different from your freaky..." you are grinning

"Hmmm..." he hums, thinking if he should tell you. "Isn't it a bit dangerous to be on a topic like this...?" He asks. Then his eyes starts scanning you from your face to your chest area which is very exposed and in his face right now.

You smirk as you eye him glancing at your cleavage. "Cheolie... are you getting seduced by my boobs right now?" You tease

"How can I not?" He looks away but the corner of his lips is curved into a smile. "You're wearing a verly low V neck shirt right now..."

You giggle at his remarks and then lean in to give your friend a kiss on the cheek which surprised him.

"Why did you kiss me?"

"Nothing... because you are so cute." You say before going back to your original position.

"Me? Cute?" He pouts, "Y/N I just talked about looking at your boobs and you find it cute?"

"I do!" You answer

"You're weird."

"Oh yeah... J am freaky..." you say, laughing.

"You are..." he adds

The two of you suddenly became quiet. The only thing you could hear now is the crackling of the woods in the bon fire and the sound of the breeze and the trees dancing.

"It's getting a bit chilly now..." Seungcheol breaks the silence. "Should we go inside now?"

"No... not yet..." you answer. "I need to do something..."

"Do what--"

Before he could even finish, you already got up and crawled on top of him

"Y/N, what are you doing?"

You move your pelvis, lower than where you are. You are trying to find the perfect spot on top of him.

"Ughh..." he breathes out as you placed your clothed core right on top of his erection. "Y/N...."

"Cheolie... Do you want to make out with me?"

"What??"

You slide your hands from his abdomen to his chest. "We're friends right...?"

"Y/N...." he grabs both your wrists. "I don't think this is a good idea..."

"Please...?" You move your hips, slightly rubbing your core to his bulge and causing him to hiss a curse under his breathe. "You can touch me if you want... I don't mind..."

"You are drunk..."

"No, I'm not..." you frown. "If I'm drunk....I won't be asking for your consent..."

"This is wrong... what you want is not right..."

"I know."

He gets up whilst you are still on hip. "And you still want to?"

You nod.

"Are you trying to use me? As rebound sex?" He chuckles

"I was not suggesting sex yet... but..." you put your arms around his neck and then move your body closer to his, "if you are okay with having sex... I'm game..." you say the few words words in a very seducing manner.

"Why me?"

"Why not?"

He laughs at how serious you are. "You are crazy, Y/N..."

"I know..." you once again rub your clothed core on his erection. Basically dry humping him. "Please...?" Your voice sounded more breathy.

"Damn it." He mumbles as the friction between you two makes him more hard.

"Here." You grab his hand and place it over your boob. "You like my boobs right...?" Then you guide his hand by rubbing his palm over and then squeezing your boob with his hand. "Feel it..." you whisper while letting his thumb feel your hardened nipple through your shirt.

"Fuck, Y/N... you are insane..." he throws his head back, holding on to not crack a smile. He is enjoying your needy side.

"C'mon Cheolie... you are making me wait for too long... do you want to or not?" While you on the other hand is being impatient.

"If I say yes," he says "What happens after we fuck?"

"We can decide after..."

"What if... I want to do it again..."

"Then let's do it again."

He's brows scrunches, "you are okay to with that?"

"Yes..."

"Even though... We are not dating?"

"Seungcheol..." you lean in a kiss him on the cheek again. "Like what we talked about... I am a little freaky... and besides you're my friend..."

"So....we're going to be.... fuck buddies?"

"If you want to..."

"No strings attached? Just... sex?"

"Yes... if I'm horny... I'll call you... and if you are horny and need me... then, call me and I'm willing to fuck you or suck you... anywhere... anytime..."

Shaking his head laughing, "Fucking hell Y/N... you are naughty..."

You roll your eyes. "Yeah, yeah... I know... so now what? Do you want to fuck with me or not? Give me an answer now coz if your not going to... I'll just go to bed..."

"You are very impatient, you know that?" He says smirking whilst his brows is furrowed. He looks amused. "I just want to make sure..." then he places his hand on your waist, sliding them under the hem of your shirt. "You are sure with this... since... we have alcohol in our system..."

"Right..." then as a needy and impatient as you are, you lean in already and started kissing Seungcheol on the lips.

The kiss surprisingly didn't start sloppy or awkward. It just went smoothly and very... arousing.

He is moaning already into the kiss. That's how good it makes him feel already.

"See.... you want it too..." you tease, smiling pulling away and looking at his turned on face.

"Who said I didn't want to?" He then carries you off him and carefully puts you back down the mat. "I wanted to wreck you since this morning when I first saw you wearing this revealing top..." his hand glides up from your tummy to your neck, right under your shirt. The motion lifted your shirt up exposing the lower part of your tits. "Fuck!" He hisses. "Your body is so fucking insane." He lowers his head and starts nibbling your skin from your belly buttom to your underboob.

"Ahh..." you inhale sharply when he sucked your skin and making sure he's leaving a mark. "Are you happy I didn't wear any bra today?" You ask

"The fuck I am." He goes to fully take off your top and start sucking and squeezing both alternately.

You moan at every suck, lick and flick he does. "Oh fuck... yes..." your hips dance every time his tongue touches your nipple.

"You're sensitive. You really like this huh?" He looks up at you while his tongue continues to pleasure you.

You nod your head, smiling while biting your lips.

"Fuck!" You throw your head back the second you felt him cup you down there. And since you're just wearing your black leggings, you could really feel his finger rubbing you there. "Ngggaaaahh..." you breathing heavy

"You sound so sexy...." he hums right st your ears as he watches you react to his strokes.

"You're teasing me too much..." you say

"Do I?" He chuckles

"Let me do the same!"

You are getting competitive now. You don't want to loose even though there is no game. You just know he's enjoying you moan just with just his little touches and licks. But you want him to whimper like you or more.

"Let me show you what I can do for you..." you push him away and then ride him on top again. "It's unfair that I'm the only one moaning in this session...." you move your hands quickly, pushing his jogging pants and his boxers down at the same time. "Dang..." your eyes widened as you see how long and thich he is. "You're hiding this from me?" You gently touch his wet tip.

"I'm not... technically hiding how big I am..." he answers before taking his shirt off. "You know I am big."

"Wow! You are one cocky mother fucker!" You laugh slapping his abs. "Let's see how cocky you'd still be after I make you come..."

"Bring it on." He says, rubbing his palm to your tits. "I've always wanted to know how your mouth feels on my dick..."

"Really? I'm flattered..." leaning in for a sweeet smooch on his lips. "Seems like... you've been having dirty thoughts about me for a while now..."

"I do..." he answers honestly, gazing straight into your eyes as your faces are just inches away. "I've been a bad friend..."

You kiss the corner of his lips. "It's fine.... I like bad boys..." you whisper sensually before you wrap your hands completely around his length.

You start slowly, pumping him while your eyes are glued to his. You want to see his face, his expression change while you squeeze him. You want to see him melt under your touch.

"Y/N... fuck!" He's breathing goes hectic as you now start to lick him. You are teasing him the way he teased you. "Ahh!" He growls when swirl your tongue on the tip.

Now, you begin to take him all in. Your whole mouth wrapped around his length. You are drooling at how big he is in your mouth but its worth it. His moaning and whimpers are all music to your ears.

"I think I'm going...t-to explode... fucking hell Y/N!"

You give him a final lick from buttom to top before giving him sensual kisses on his abdomen and then to his pecks.

"Do you want to explode inside of me?"

Those words pumped his adrenaline even more. You know it did coz his dick got flexes and got more harder than what it is. He even got up as quickly as he can and take you in for a kiss before he warns you and says, "Now, let me fuck you real good... raw and hard."

[crowautumnrain]

review: Color Rush

Disclaimer: This is my very own humble opinion. If you  agree with my review, I’m glad that I’ve found someone like-minded, if  you do not agree, that’s fine too. Every opinion is valid. Don’t hate me  for mine.

I do not speak any asian language and therefore I rely solely on subtitles. And we all know that they are not always flawless. So if I misread a situation or misunderstand something, feel free to inform me. Spoilers ahead!

Genre: BL

From: Korea

Known Actors:  /

Trigger Warnings: obsession, death, attempted suicide

Rating: 7.5/10 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐☆ ☆    

Synopsis: Yeon Woo knows the world is full of colors but he has never seen them for himself, he’s only able see the world in shades of grey. At least until the day Yoo Han comes crashing into his world. And it turns out that they are mono and probe. Means that Yeon Woo is able to see colors, everytime Yoo Han takes off his mask. While all this is going on, his aunt Yi Rang searches desperately for her sister who went missing years ago.

Main Character(s): Choi Yeon Woo, Go Yoo Han

Side Character(s):  Jung Joo Haeng, Kim Min Jae, Yoo Yi Rang

Short Appereance: Yeon Woo’s mother & father, the school nurse

Main Couple(s): YeonWooxYooHan

Side Couple(s): /

My review:

I went into this show trying to keep my expectations low - well as low as I can keep them. This was my third korean BL, before that I watched Where Your Eyes Linger and Mr. Heart and I liked both of them. Oh boy, I wasn’t ready for the rabbit hole I was going down.

I always try to remain a somewhat objective side in my reviews, so that everyone can enjoy it, no matter if they actually liked the show or not. I will try my best to do it with this BL as well, but just know that it’s not easy for me. The last few days were a wild ride and thanks to the pandemic and the semi-lockdown that we have for weeks now, I am in no good place to get emotionally attached to characters or series. But here I am.

In this review there will be a few terms that some may not know or understand and before I have to repeat myself, here a little definition:

Mono: A mono, is a person that isn’t able to see colors, even though they have everything they needed to. Their brain just can’t decipher them for some reason. Only, when they look at the face of a special someone called “probe” they are able to see colors.

Probe: A probe is a person which can see all colors and by looking at their mono, with their whole face uncovered the monos can see colors.

Color Rush: It’s something the mono experiences every time, he looks at his probe. The frist few times are pretty heavy and the mono mostly faints, but at a while the effects wear off.

Decolorating: After some time (e.g. the mono isn’t looking at the face of the probe anymore, they seperate) they begin to lose the ability to see colors again. It depends on different factors (e.g. how many colors rushes did you have, how close are you with your probe, etc.) The more you “get used to” your probe the longer you can see colors.

Anyway, let’s begin.

Yeon Woo and Yoo Han

In the beginning of this story our main character, Yeon Woo, explains his view on this whole mono/probe thing. He himself is a mono and his mother was also a mono. The chance for a mono to meet his probe is extremely rare and most don’t think that they will ever meet their probe at all - and so does Yeon Woo.

The problem with the whole mono/probe thing is that many monos are getting really often obsessed with their probe and the colors that they are able to see. The fear of losing them is driving them insane and therefore some monos kidnap, hurt and kill their probe.

Yeon Woo stance to that: A mono should never meet his probe.

After beating up some guy who made fun of Yeon Woo for being a mono, he has to transfer schools again. On his way there he explains that he can actually see different shades of grey and that his mother teached him the ten differenct shades of the grey color palette.

Introduction of orange hoddie guy. He slept on his desk but now he wakes up (the teacher’s don’t even care to wake him up anymore, love that). And after he introduces himself as Yoo Han, he wants to make very clear (perhaps too clear) that Yeon Woo is “really pretty”.

He even gets up from his chair and follows Yeon Woo across the room, to tell him that again. In case he forgot over the course of a few minutes. But hey, we all need a friend who constantly reminds us that we are enough and beautiful, go Yoo Han!

Anyways, Yeon Woo is minding his own business and stares at a poster and after Yoo Han once again admired Yeon Woo’s beauty, Yoo Han takes of his mask, that he was wearing for some reason (Joo Haeng said that he tried to make it a new trend or smth).

We don’t know why he took it off. If he had trouble breathing, if he wanted to prove to Yeon Woo that he was also stunningly handsome or if he just felt like it.

And that’s when Yeon Woo experiences his first color rush. Overwhelmed by the it he faints. And for some reason, Yoo Han seems not scared at all but excited to be part of this adventure. And after taking Yeon Woo to the school nurse, he says something along the lines of: Oh his eyes are closed but his eyes are moving, that means that he is experiencing a color rush.

And the nurse, that probably doesn’t get paid enough, repsonds with: Yeah, maybe. I dunno, it’s my first time seeing this. Let me know if he rips out his eyeballs or dies or smth. I gotta go get some stuff. Bye.

Yeon Woo opens his eyes and is amazed by the colors that he is able to see. But loses the ability pretty quickly. And Yoo Han declares - in case Yeon Woo might have missed it - that he is in fact Yeon Woo’s probe.

Of course, Yeon Woo is really sad that he is back to the grey-ish palette of life again, but he stays strong and says that he does not want to do this again. He reminds Yoo Han that being a mono/probe is all fun and games until the mono get’s obsessed. Like, monos have kidnapped and killed their probes and apparently ate their flesh?

But Yoo Han couldn’t be more unbothered by that. And I don’t know if I should be impressed or worried because of that. After Yeon Woo explains his concerns to Yoo Han, the guy’s like: Ah.

Yoo Han is not only immune to fear and common sense, he is also very headstrong and is determent to teach Yeon Woo the colors. The question we all have in mind probably is:

Why is Yoo Han so eager to continue this dangerous relationship?

Well we get a great answer to that from Yoo Han himself: He likes Yeon Woo’s eye moevement while he experiences a color rush, so...yeah.

Great reason, let’s move on.

The next day of school, Yoo Han got a color palette to show Yeon Woo and to teach him the different colors. But since Yeon Woo doesn’t want to do a color rush again he pretents that he isn’t interested. Yeon Woo has enough of Yoo Han constantly being all up his ass with all this color rush thing, so he tries to leave. But Yoo Han tricks him. After Yoo Han recognizes that Yeon Woo isn’t giving in, he takes off his mask. Yeon Woo faints and wakes up in the nursing room.

This time, the nurse isn’t there. it’s probably her break or something. Before Yeon Woo can get really upset about Yoo Han’s trick, he sees the colors palette and all the colors on it. And the desire in him grows. But decolorating happens only a few seconds later.

And there’s where we see the first glance of desperation of Yeon Woo. He demands that Yoo Han takes off his mask, so he can see the colors again, but Yoo Han is a smart business man and so he wants something in return. He’s like: That was the preview, the free trial is over. From no on, you gotta pay.

And since Yeon Woo isn’t giving in, their ways part. And the story ends...if Yoo Han would actually respect boundaries. But he doesn’t so here we go.

Yoo Han tries again to lure Yeon Woo into agreeing to his deal. He shows him with the power of science and prism a rainbow and the nightview.

No matter how hard Yeon Woo tries to stay away from Yoo Han, Yoo Han pulls him back in.

Yoo Han says that this the last time, that he will give Yeon Woo a color rush for free. And Yeon Woo agrees, thinking that this will be his last time before telling Yoo Han that he will end this for good.

As the colors seem to fade away again, the desperation creeps up on Yeon Woo once again. He asks Yoo Han what he wants in return to keep doing this. And as we all know he wants to look at his face.

And to our big surprise, Yeon Woo finally agrees to Yoo Han’s deal. The next day, Yeon Woo regrets what he did, just like someone who drunk too much last night. He considers to avoid Yoo Han, but we all know how that works out.

So, Yoo Han has the great idea to scare Yeon Woo, by jumping in front of him and scream, which results in Yoo Han getting accidentally punched by Yeon Woo. They go the the nursing room and at that point I ask myself how they are doing in school, since they never seem to attend classes.

The nurse is probably still on her break or she just quit, who knows. We get the classic “I’ll treat your wound” scene. The inevitable happens, and after putting a little too much pressure on Yoo Han’s wound, Yoo Han flinches and the mask slides off his face. Another color rush.

Yeon Woo wakes up but can’t remember anything. Yoo Han explains that Yeon Woo cried his eyes out, but didn’t seem concious.

Yeon Woo apparently said that he needed the colors to see the headband (of his mother who disappeared and apparently wore the headband that day).The nurse comes in and seems not too happy about the fact that these two visit her at least once a week.

She says that this was totally normal and one of the phases a mono went through, while adjusting to one’s probe. The color rush would extend and he would not be able to remember afterwards. In that way his subconcious could surface.

And while Yeon Woo’s feelings are still all over the place, Yoo Han has set his priorities straight: So that he get’s used to the color rushes is a good sign, right?

Like, your man is sitting there crying his eyes out and you think about him adjusting to you? Dude, at least pretend that you care about his inner turmoil.

The nurse keeps up a professional facade and adds as polite as she can be: Don’t do it at school for the time being. Which basically translates to: Can you two give me a break for once? I haven’t worked this hard since 1986 and I’m 29.

On their way out, Yoo Han says: I’m happy that you are adjusting to it. Like he just wasn’t right next to Yeon Woo weeping like someone would rip his heart out. That’s when Yoo Han remembers that he has a heart and should use it once in a while and he adds: You scared me a little back there.

Yeah, me too, buddy. Me too.

While Yoo Han tries to have this converstaion, Yeon Woo is caught up in his thoughts. And I mean he has all reason to be upset. He is scared of what will come next. What if he get’s used to his probe and the colors? What comes after that? Obsession...kidnapping?

Because Yeon Woo hasn’t said anything, Yoo Han is scared that he might has forgotten how pretty he is, so Yoo Han has to remind him again. We love a supportive probe. But for real Yoo Han, we got it the first three times, I think he knows by now.

Yoo Han doesn’t think about any of this “obsession”-stuff at all, so he doesn’t get why Yeon Woo isn’t so thrilled about the whole thing. Outside, Yoo Han cuddles Yeon Woo from behind and says that he was actually worried earlier and they have to wait here because it’s raining.

We never get an explanation why that’s a problem. Maybe he forgot his umbrella and doesn’t want to get wet or wait there all on his own? Or Yoo Han hopes that he can show him a real rainbow this time? But wouldn’t it be a little careless to do another color rush shortly after what had happened?

Yeon Woo is again caught up in his thoughts. And we can feel how much he suffers already: [...] But when I felt a moment of happiness, I saw the happiness draining out from my view. Loss. Only having moments of happiness...that leave me all alone in a land of grey...terrifies me.

Long story short, Yeon Woo tries to run away, and after Yoo Han stops him and asks why he did that, he says: Because it just crossed my mind that I want to keep you forever.

HUGE RED FLAG my guy! Yoo Han RUN!

This might have been cute in other shows and all...because we tend to romantacize this “I can’t live without you” and “I never wat to lose you”...but we all know that it isn’t meant in a cute way. He wants to keep him. You know, like you would keep an object. A refrigerator or something like that. Not a human being.

The following day, Yoo Han is not in school and you got me there. I was really thinking that maybe my boy here would finally take a hint and leave. Yeon Woo thinks that it’s because of what he said to him yesterday, which would make sense. But we all know Yoo Han, with his death wish that he probably has and the distance that he keeps from comon sense.

So, of course he isn’t avoiding school, becaue his mono - that told him mulitple times that monos get obsessive and kidnap their probes - just now told him that he wanted to keep him. And it seems that Yoo Han is really wearing rose-colored glasses, because he isn’t able to see the red flags. Or maybe he has his own reasons why he wants to be near him...(yes I’m blatantly forshadowing here).

He later texts Yeon Woo and they make a trip to “have fun with colors”. This is the first time Yeon Woo doesn’t faint, while experiencing a color rush and they goof around and hold hands and are cute together. And Yeon Woo is thinking that he would want to keep these colors and the happy feeling forever, even if that would mean that he would have to hurt Yoo Han...true love right there, people.

Alas, this trip ends and Yeon Woo returns to his tense state, worrying that he might get more and more attached to his probe. He thanks Yoo Han for this trip and wants to go, but Yoo Han isn’t ready to let him go just yet.

So, they both return to Yeon Woo’s house, thinking that the aunt is still on her “business trip”. Shortly before Yeon Woo’s father died, he painted a picture of his mother, but he never got a “real” look at it with all its colors. Yoo Han agrees to help him see the picture with “all its colors”. After a brief breakdown and Yoo Han reassuring him that he is by his side and he will be the key to his colors, the door opens. Turns out the aunt is back! You didn’t see that coming, did you?

Yeon Woo and Yoo Han try their best to keep their mono/probe status a secret. And they are as good in hiding a secret as kids are, when they give you a totally normal drink that they definitely didn’t fill with salt or dirt or something and can’t stop giggling and begging you to take a big sip.

Yeon Woo tries to act normal, even though he sees his aunt in “full color” for the first time. And Yoo Han is over there smililing like: yep, I know exactly what’s going on right now, you can thank me later.

Yeon Woo walks Yoo Han to the bus station. On their way Yeon Woo is happy to let Yoo Han know that he can still see the colors. And Yoo Han gets all excited like: OMG! That means that your feelings for me let you slowly accept it. And Yeon Woo is like: Yeah, no definitely not. Feelings for you??

They arrive at the bus station and Yoo Han has to flex with his kind of impressive knowledge about colors.  After Yoo Han entered the bus, Yeon Woo’s decolerating.

Yeon Woo is again, desperately trying to cling onto the colors and has a minor breakdown. Thinking that without Yoo Han life is empty and lifeless and he’s just feels like an empty shell. And I’m here like...dude the ship is about to sail, get on board and leave as long as you can! You are already obsessed with him, please!

As he returns back to his aunt, she let’s him know that she ain’t stupid and knows that Yoo Han is his probe. Isn’t that obvious? The whole school probably knows already. I mean, look at them.

The aunt got all the brain cells and she’s like: You have to transfer schools and we have to move. Finally an adult being an adult and doing wise and good things. But oh no, it’s too late and Yeon Woo is determent to stay: “I will try my best to handle it. I’m different I’m not like other monos.” I can resist and rise above the urge.”

Huh..my dear, are we just pretending like you weren’t breaking down, because your life felt lifeless without him and you already think about keeping him? And now you are sitting there pretending you are all high and mighty and “different?” while you are obsession over the guy you met like a week ago? Lying to her saying that you can handle it and will rise above the urge, while you had a breakdown just FIVE MINUTES AGO? Mmk...

And the aunt is continuing asking the real questions: Are you not aware of the loss you’ll experience? How can you possibly handle that? And I’m like: YES! Please, help them! Go get him! But alas, my hopes crashed, because Yeon Woo starts to cry and no one can be mad at Yeon Woo when he cries. And so his aunt’s like: K, we stay.

And so these wise words were sadly too late. Yeon Woo is already in too deep. The next time he is in school, Yoo Han is not there. And he switched to full obsession mode. With a concerningly calmy voice he asks his friends: What if I kidnap Yoo Han? Like it was something totally normal to ask.

Joo Haeng tries to make this situation less weird and says: Hah..ha.. I mean, if you would kidnap him he probably would lock the door himself.

His other friend, Min Jae totally looks through this “jokes” and says: Do you really want to become a monster? That’s when Joo Haeng seems to understand that this wasn’t a joke at all. And his expression changes and you could slowly see the realisation:.haha..that’s a weird joke to make..okay..no one’s laughing..wait..you were joking right?

Yeon Woo falls more and more into the dark rabbit whole and buys a bunch off stuff that you would totally need to kidnap someone, but the seller is like: Teenagers these days. Guess, I’m minding my own business. Which I always aprove, but not in this case! Dude you live in a world with monos who go insane and kidnap their probes and you don’t wanna maybe...inform some authorities? Check his ID or call the police? Anything? No?

Espacially with so many cases popping up shouldn’t monos get asigned some therapist or counselor or someone who keeps an eye on them?

While Yeon Woo is researching how to tie a rope, his aunt comes in and asks him, if he is okay. Sweety, I love you, but he is CLEARLY NOT OKAY! She says that she can feel that something’s off. He reminds her off his mother, shortly before she brought home his father. Yeon Woo reassures her that he’s fine and not up to anything. And she just...  leaves.

Yoo Han returns to school because he missed Yeon Woo - probably the way Yeon Woo stares at him. Yoo Han notices the mark on Yeon Woo’s wrist (he tried to tie the rope around his wrist to learn it) and get’s worried. But not about himself, of course. Because why would you?

And Yeon Woo’s like: I wonder how this mark seems to him. Well I’m telling you, if he isn’t running away now, don’t worry too much about Yoo Han, because I think that he really has a death wish. He would probably tie his own rope, if you ask him nicely.

Yeon Woo reminds us that he was right all along. A mono and a probe shouldn’t meet. A mono will only hurt his probe, because he doesn’t want to lose, what the probe can show him.

So, yeah. What’s the lesson here, kids? When someone tells you that they are “not good for you” or “dangerous”, believe them. Because they are.

Despite Yeon Woo’s assumptions, Yoo Han can’t read minds and that’s why he has no clue what’s going on. Instead, he lists the different shades of brown. And oh boy did this show teach me about all the different shades of colors I didn’t know existed.

Yeon Woo is seemingly melting. The two look at a picture that Yeon Woo painted of his mother in grey colors. They talk a little about how Yeon Woo sees the world, when Yoo Han isn’t there.

Despite standing so close to his probe, Yeon Woo decolerates. This catches him totally off guard and he runs away. At home, he rambles on about how he becomes a monster and that this monster is coming for Yoo Han. And that there is only one way to keep Yoo Han safe. And he uses the rope and tries to hang himself.

He wakes up in a hospital. His aunt is with him and tells him that he was out for ten days. She adds, that she knew that something was up and what he was planing. Mmhm, yeah of course. That’s what I always say when I pretend that I saw a plot twist coming. I know your game Yi Rang.

The house is back on the market and no one knows where he is (well besides the two of them ig). We follow him for an unclear amount of time. He takes pills that are supposed to help him.

Even though Yeon Woo is sad that this means goodbye Yoo Han, he accepts it, thinking that this was the only way that things could get back to normal again. What a selfless man. Putting the well being of his love before his own happiness (well it’s also better for his sanity tbh).

And that’s how it all en- Oh, right. Yoo Han is not selfless and he doesn’t care about his own well being. That’s why one night, after Yeon Woo overanalyses his current situation, someone is standing outside of his window. And surprise: It’s Yoo Han.

He climbs through the window with such grace that I thought that this might be a dream. And Yeon Woo probably felt the same, because he says that this can’t be real and that this is probably only another hallucination. But Yoo Han takes off his mask to show him, that he’s real. He is here to rescue him..from the hospital, I guess. After Yeon Woo changed, they both run to a bus station and drive off into happiness aka to the ocean.

They are planning to go to the beach, because Yoo Han wants to show Yeon Woo the real color of the ocean, but they have to stay at a hotel overnight. While Yoo Han has to sleep on the floor, he opens a little bit up about why he is here and what happened.

And what basically happened is: Yeon Woo disappeared and because he didn’t want to lose him, this was the only solution he had in mind.

The next day they both chill at the beach and it’s time for Yoo Han to show off his color-knowledge again. So he lists all the different shades of blue - well the shades he can recall. And Yoo Han says that he memorizes them and the thought of Yeon Woo would make it easier for him to do it. What a man, honestly. Like, I struggle lately with studying and concentrating and seeing him putting up with all that work for, so he can pretend that he is the master of the color-universe for two minutes or less. That’s determination.

Yeon Woo calls his aunt to make sure that she doesn’t die of a heart attack, after her nephew also disappeared and the aunt says that Yoo Han has a really powerful family and that they will press charges against Yeon Woo for kidnapping Yoo Han, if they don’t come back. Yeon Woo is upset that Yoo Han’s parents are pressing charges against something he didn’t do (well I mean he probably did it multiple times in his head).

Yoo Han FINALLY tells him the whole truth. That he is no longer interested in becoming an idol and prefers to study and (more importantly) he tells him the REAL reason why he was so eager to have Yeon Woo around him.

And get ready you guys because this will blow your minds: He isn’t able to recognize faces. Faceblindness. BUT he is ablte to see Yeon Woo’s face. Which was the reason that he was so drawn to him. Everytime they would seperate, he wouldn’t be able to remember it. Only, when he saw him in front of him (espacially when he experienced a color rush) he was able to see it.

Just imagine how lucky they are? I mean, just imagine you can’t see faces and one day you can. But only one face and this one face belongs to Yeon Woo who is just gorgeous and has a beautiful and kind soul. It could’ve been any face that he was able to see. Same goes for Yeon Woo. His probe could’ve been anyone. To be this lucky just once in life..

Yeon Woo still worries that he might get even more obsessed over time and that he might harm Yoo Han one day. But Yoo Han is like: Dude, don’t you realize how super special we are? I can only see your face and you can only see colors with my face. I don’t care. I can see your face. You can see colors. We like each other.

And so they kiss and become boyfriends and return home.

A little time jump. Yeon Woo is preparing some food for Yoo Han and talks to his aunt who is not a fan of all of this but she supports him anyways. In school Yoo Han is talking to Min Jae who is giving him the code to the rooftop door of the school, so Yeon Woo and Yoo Han can have a little date. And everything is back to normal. The mother is still missing, Joo Haeng is still treated like the  least favorite child by Yoo Han. And Yeon Woo and Yoo Han still don’t attend classes.

Min Jae and Joo Haeng

Apparently Joo Haeng and Yoo Han are childhood best friends, even though Yoo Han seems to have a different definition of friends than I do. Yeon Woo meets the guys on his first day at school.

They are helping him, when he experiences a color rush. Min Jae is able to speak to his dead grandpa and gets visions form time to time. And the fact that Min Jae was able to predict the death of two students is just quickly talked about.

While Yeon Woo and Yoo Han have their moments we sometimes see Joo Haeng and Min Jae had their little “look at them being all cute and in love together” moments.

The aunt

Most of the time the aunt is away for “business trips” and Yeon Woo explains to us that she is actually looking for her sister. We never find out if she actually finds clues or why she is looking for her on an island.

Yeon Woo has many chances to tell his aunt that he has met his mono, but every time he chooses not to. Eventually she finds it out herself, after looking at Yeon Woo and Yoo Han for five minutes. And I mean, that was relatable.

When she walked in on Yeon Woo doing suspicous stuff, the only thing she says it: Don’t do anything stupid. Because that ever prevented something stupid from happening. Ma´am, if you think that he might be up to something stupid and you feel the need to point out that he shouldn’t do anything stupid why don’t you keep an eye on him???

In the end she is still a little careful about her nephew and the probe, but she accepts them being boyfriends, I guess.

Things I disliked

This show was wild ride. I even considered droping it, because I was not in the right mental state to watch a bad ending. But I made it through and I’m happy that I did. I love this show. But you know me. Nothing’s perfect.

Better built up to the drama. Even though the built up was pretty good, it would’ve been way better, if it did include the side characters more. So that the side characters could actually play an important/active role in this. Like the random nurse who was only there for exposition and only appeared when it was convenient, she could’ve seen Yeon Woo being all obsessed and talk to him or Yoo Han about it. And I mean, Min Jae was able to see visions and knew so much. He could’ve talked to Yoo Han about Yeon Woo “joking” that he would kidnap Yoo Han.

Too much plot for too little time. Most BL Kdramas have about the same length as a movie (circa 80 min.) which seems much, but really isn’t, compared to straigth Kdrama and the fact that it’s a series not a movie. It is espacially not enough, when you look at the heaviness of the plot. If you have a lighthearted and fluffy show, you don’t need to go too much into depth and make a 200 min. drama out of it. But Color Rush deals with so many heavy topics (obsession, suicide, loss). And the series is suffering because of that (so many questions left unanswered).

Like, the obvious one is that the mystery about the mother’s disappearence is never actually a plotline. The aunt runs off looking for her and Yeon Woo is sad because she’s gone but that’s it. I watched this show so many times and the more I watch it, the more questions I have... Did the mother also plan to kidnap the father? But they fell in love and got married before she could go psycho on him? Did she kill him? Is that why the mother disappeared? Did she run away because she just couldn’t live without him after he allegedly died?

And also an important questions: Why the hell, was Yoo Han so styled up in the last two episodes? He arrived with his hair styled and all dressed up like he just finished a photoshooting. Was that what was happening? Was that related to him being an idol trainee? Or was that the teenager in him trying to dress up for Yeon Woo like “well I don’t know if he is actually there but we haven’t seen in two weeks, so I gotta look breathtaking, you never know when you are going to meet the love of your life”. This is one of the questions that keep me up at night. I. Need. Answers.

I am dying to know the answer to these questions, but we have simply not enough information to guess what could’ve happened.

So yeah, they definitely have a time problem, which isn’t that uncommon for Korean BLs. Don’t get me wrong. A short serie can still be good, if it can carry the plot. It shouldn’t be too big or too heavy. But I will always prefer series that have 30+ min. per episode simply because as soon as I am invested in the episode it’s already over. Ten or fifteen minutes aren’t enough most of the time.

The ending seemed rushed, too. So many things were left unresolved. Like, Yeon Woo is still dangerous and even says that he only get’s more obsessed every day. And suddenly the parents and the aunt are totally okay that Yeon Woo and Yoo Han are together and hang out, even though they were so against it a few minutes ago. Something that could’ve been solved over time with more episodes and time.

More scenes that establish the characters and the friendship. In a short series it’s important that every scene drives the plot forward or at least establishes something important. That’s why Where Your Eyes Linger worked so well, the mains already knew each other, so you could immediately start with the plot and you didn’t need to waste time for them to meet and fall in love.

There is no room for filler or anything like that. I wish we would’ve seen more scenes with the whole friend group (all of them present) and more between Yoo Han and Yeon Woo without the color rush. Let them hang out afterwards to let them bond more. Because Yeon Woo says this very poetic thing at the end of the series: Am I obsessed with you becaue you are my probe, or am I obsessed with my probe because it’s you.

And as poetic as this sounds, it throws me off a little, since Yeon Woo and Yoo Han haven’t spent much time together to really get to know each other the answer that Yeon Woo is only obsessed with Yoo Han because of the mono/probe thing seems more believeable. The “am I obsessed with my probe because it’s you” implies that Yoo Han is special and means much to him as a person and that’s why Yeon Woo just HAs to fall for him. But they rarely spent time together that doesn’t focus on the color rush and the mono/probe part.

But then again, maybe it’s a choice to show that Yeon Woo isn’t aware that he and Yoo Han could be more than mono/probe? And that makes Yeon Woo think that he has no chance but to kidnap Yoo Han to be near him. Like, looking back, Yeon Woo never thought about it. His mother and his father (mono and probe) married, but him being in a relationship with Yoo Han still didn’t cross his mind once. He was like: We can’t see each other every day and went straight to well i don’t want to ever lose you so I gotta kidnap you.

Show more struggle. This show deals so much with internal struggle of Yeon Woo who realizes that he slowly get’s obsessed with his probe. And even though I really liked how they showed his struggle internally and externally to some extend, I wish they would’ve done more with that. I want him to have the rope ready in his backpack but not giving in to the to the urge. I want him daydreaming about kidnapping Yoo Han and really having a plan in mind.

No warning. Another thing that sort of bugged me a little was that Yeon Woo didn’t warn Yoo Han after the beginning. Just one scene were he’s like: “Dude, don’t you get it. I can’t be without you. I think about you constantly and the fear of losing the colors- of losing you is driving me insane. You need to keep your distance from now on. I can’t gurantee you that you will be safe with me and I can’t promise that I can actually resist the urge anymore.”

And then you could either seperate them or Yoo Han says smth like: “I know that feeling, I also think about you constantly and I miss you” and this just turns into a big miscomunnication/love confession-thing. Because Yoo Han really understands the feeling, since he is kind of obsessed with Yeon Woo too (because of his faceblindsness and the fact that he can only see Yeon Woo’s face) and Yeon Woo thinks that Yoo Han is not getting it and it’s a love declaration but it’s not - well it is but you get the drill.

Or, as I addressed earlier, Min Jae playing a bigger role and telling his friend that Yeon Woo is slowly going insane and thinks about kidknapping him.

And if all that doesn’t work out for some reason or it’s just...too much effort  make a parallel to the one scene between the talk of Yeon Woo and his aunt at the beginning: The aunt finds the stuff that Yeon Woo baught (or she just connects the dots sooner) and she wants to talk to him. “How can you handle it?” and this time Yeon Woo says “I don’t know what to do. I thought I could handle it, but I can’t.” and they work together to make a plan. And you can still have him go to the hospital and Yoo Han coming to the rescue.

All the time, I keep asking myself, why apparently no one felt the need to inform his aunt or maybe the probe about the situation? “Hey Yoo Han, Yeon Woo was really weird today. Talked about kidnapping you, please be careful.”

Like, I watch so many BL’s and at some point the parents or the ex-girlfriend or SOMEONE is always getting involved and tries to tear the couple apart. And for once, I would be okay with this plot device of the friends being cockblocks or the aunt threatening Yoo Han to stay away from Yeon Woo ESPACIALLY IF IT’S FOR HIS OWN GOOD DAMN SAFETY! But no.

That’s all the friends needed to do. You had one job, guys, one job.

Things I liked

The music. A banger. Listen to it on Spotify almost every day. Korean BLs just have on of the best music.

The chemistry. In a short series (espacially with short episodes) a good chemistry is fundamental so we can bond faster with the characters and the relationships. And in this show where the two leads are getting obsessed over each other, so here it’s espacially important so we can feel their deep desire for each other, if you want to call it that.

Yoo Han seemed a little emotionless and stiff at times, but IIRC he’s supposed to have a hard time with all these emotions, espacially with facial expressions, which makes sense.

The rainbow scene. One of my favorite scenes by far.

the handholding. We all know that it’s about the hands with the gays. It’s all about the hands.

the colors, the hole scene looked so beautiful shot with the dark background and the blue shirt of Yoo Han and the freaking rainbow.

Yeon Woo having fun, which is a rarity in this show.

We get another glimps of how fast Yeon Woo can go from uwu to -.-. The way he smashes Yoo Han against the wall...

The display of the power dynamic and how both of them try to get the upper hand. And looking back this scene shows that Yoo Han tries to contorl his own obsession by luring Yeon Woo into accepting the deal.

The iconic lines: The colors in this world are yours to enjoy...only when I let you see them. Which was an asshole move - but dare I say it - ...kinda savage.

The storyline. Loved it. Great idea. I want more of it. I’m a sucker for soulmates. I know some think that this series was problematic and had bad writing and I respect that, but I have to disagree. Sure, it’s not perfect and definitely not a masterpiece. But it’s good, imo. The forshadowing of Yoo Han and how he from day one was so facinated by Yeon Woo and his face, that nothing could bring him to his senses to freaking run. It was cute, fun and exciting to watch. I wouldn’t mind a second season to wind up some loose ends.

The beautiful editing. I loved the editing in this one! No unecessary slapstick sounds. No unecessary music that would play randomly. Just the color rush that showed you not only what Yeon Woo was seeing, but helped you to get a deeper understanding in what was going on. It was also used to help you relate to his situation more.

The power dynamic. In this show there is a constant power change. In the begining you think that a probe should be the one with power, right? Since they have the power to let their mono see colors and take them away from them. The monos want something from them and that gives them power. Probe > Mono

But you learn that monos get obsessed and can be extremely dangerous and therefore many probes should run from their mono. Giving the power to the monos. Mono > Probe

In this series, it at first seems like Yoo Han (the probe) holds the power since he is constantly trying to be around Yeon Woo and demostrates his power (the rainbow scene). Probe > Mono

But the more episodes you watch, you realize that Yeon Woo gets more and more obsessed, means that he is dangerous. He could hurt Yoo Han any time. So it seems that Yeon Woo was in power all along. Mono > Probe

BUT in the last episode Yoo Han explains that he can only see Yeon Woo’s face and as soon as they seperate he forgets his face. This would further proof that Yeon Woo has the upper hand here. BUT the thing is, they are sort of equals here. Yeon Woo has the “power” to let Yoo Han see his face and taking it away his face from Yoo Han. This means that in some way both hold kind of some power in their relationship making it somewhat equal, which is important. Yeon Woo = Yoo Han

And I think that’s beautiful. A relationship needs to consist of two equals. It can’t be healthy if one is always the one in charge and the other has no say in things.

The Color-Talks. I read a few post complaining that the series was wasting time by talking too much about colors. And I can kinda agree that it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but in this show they did it for a reason. They could’ve cut it out, but it was important. The series is called Color Rush (look at the name, read it again, think about it, reread it, take it in and exhale it and now look in the mirror and answer the question: What is this show about?). Take I Told Sunset About You they also talk a lot about the chinese letters and what they mean and how you write them, would you consider that a waste of time? Maybe, but it’s not.

I’m actually glad that they didn’t cut it out. Just imagine one scene like this: “Oh there are many different shades of brown. There is chocolate, caramel, cinnamon [cut] and the last one is chestnut.” It would not only take away the flow but also feel somewhat half-assed and undermine the importance of this for Yeon Woo, who learns about the colors for the fist time. It means the world to him.

Also that they thought about the ten different shades of grey fits perfectly and seems well thought through. It makes perfect sense that people who are only able to see grey, would try to name the different shades.

It’s about the hands.

And this aren’t all of them. Do I have to say more?

That’s all I have to say about this series. Check out my other reviews.

My BL Review List: https://urmyquerencia.tumblr.com/post/627642344497364992/bl-reviews

- urmyquerencia

[fiction-in-my-blood]

Switching Sides: Part 11 (HLITF)

if anyone possibly wants to get on a tag list I’d be happy to make one

👉 @theshove 👈

If you wanna catch up, Part 10 is right here! Happy reading :)

Premise: Growing up in a life of crime in a Japanese mafia, Atsuko Motomori has seen enough injustice to last her a lifetime. To try and give back to the universe her family has taken so much from, she dreams of being a detective from a young age. Her twin, sharing her disgust for her father and many uncles, just wants an ordinary life away from the crime, paing and suffering. Instead, she wants to be in the spotlight with the soft notes she makes with her cello. In their escape of 2015, on their coming of age birthday, they must split ways, never to be together ever again. If one was found, they didn’t want the other dragged down with them. Atsuko, having changed her name and appearance as best she can without a scalpel, sets off to start her life of car chases and arrests.

Four years in a seemingly dead-end police station in the middle of nowhere, being passed over time after time for promotion, Atsuko finally gets a shot at her dream, having been sent to an academy for the best candidates in the country by her boss who had always kept an eye out for her. After discovering her boss may have made her bite off more than she could chew, Atsuko must become the slave of a dominating instructor!? Who so just happens to be the captain of the most famous police unit in Japan? Not to mention a total knockout! Will Atsuko finally achieve her dream? Or will her new instructor put her through the wringer?

Warnings: Language, Reference to sexual activity, Forceful nature, Abuse, Kidnapping, Torture.

~~~~~~

Months had passed since I was taken to the Police Station for questioning. Luckily, my life had been pretty uneventful and the days went by slowly. Juna and her baby were healthy, shoen by the boxes and pieces of baby furniture over every surface in the apartment. Apparently, she's an avid online shopper. And it was my job to clean up after her. At times, I forgot we were once separate entities, no connections and supposedly no knowledge on the other. Now I was practically waiting on her hand and foot.

Noburu and I had gotten... closer. Because I wasn’t in the committing stage of my life at that moment, we mainly just hung out at the bowling alley or had lunch together at fast food eateries and cafes during the day. He was free to date whoever he wanted, we weren’t even an official item, so I wasn’t going to hold him back because I knew I would never be able to give him what other, normal, girls could. I knew he would never know who I really was, and I was fine with that.

As I walked down the street, on the way to my night job, I gazed up at the sky. With all that time to myself during my commute from workplace to workplace, I had moments where I thought back on my past. At the moment, my mom was filtering through my thoughts. I wondered what my life would have been like if she had taken us with her. Or if she had stayed all together. I honestly didn't blame her for what she did, she found her chance and she took it, not knowing whether she'll live or not. ‘But, I can't say I could do the same…’

Sighing, I opened the door to the club, trying to get all memories of my past out of my head so I could greet Noburu cheerfully, like usual. 

Inside, however, I was affronted by a scene of destruction. Tables and chairs were overturned. The glasses that hung on the walls were smashed and the stench of alcohol was almost unbearable. My shoes almost stuck to the floor as I tiptoed through the shards of glass to inspect further, hoping the vandal wasn't still here. Just in case, though, I pulled the switchblade knife out of my bag that I held for instances like these that were likely the Hoshino mafia's doing.

Suddenly, I heard a crunch behind me and I tried to spin around to see if it was Noburu, who would often get to work before me. Before I could catch the gaze of that person, a gloved hand clamped hard on my mouth and an arm wrapped around my body. I jumped up and down, screaming, just to try and get out of the assailant's strong grasp by hitting the thick forearms with the bud of my palm. Without even a huff of effort, who I assumed to be a man, picked me up as I struggled for my life. It had to be one of my father's men, why else would someone kidnap me?

Despite all my struggling, and digging the blade as far into the man's arm as I could, I was thrown into the back of a van. Scrambling to my feet, my weapon still stuck in the assailant's body, I tried to jump through the open door, but my ankle was grabbed and pulled back in. In effect of my fall, I hit my head on something sticking out of the floor, knocking me right out.

~~~~~~

When I stirred again, my vision was blurry and my skull felt heavy. I tried to move my hands to rub my tired eyes, but I quickly discovered my wrists were bound to the arms of the chair I was sitting on, as well as my ankles to the legs. 

Adrenaline pumping through my system, my gaze darted around the dark room. There were no lights, it almost felt like I was still asleep, trapped in my own consciousness. Noticing a moving figure in the corner of the room, I squinted. What resulted in that was an evil chuckle.

"You're finally awake." The haunting voice of my father echoed through the room and my heart stopped. My ears rang, remembering the day I had almost killed him. How was he here? Kaga and I were barely able to make it out as unharmed as we were. I couldn’t really form words in that moment, I could hardly remember any of my teachings of the Japanese language, all I knew was pain and confusion.

Slowly, the dim lighting flickered on and I found myself in a concrete box. There was one door across from me. There were no windows. No vents. Just the electric lights hanging from the ceiling and the chair I was sitting on. Only now did I realise the deathly chill in the air, which likely meant we were underground. If we were outside, the concrete would heat up and turn that room into a pressure cooker.

"You're not going to greet your father? After all you've done!" My father had been making his way to my side as I inspected the room in a clearer light. Once he was close enough, he kicked the legs of my chair, forcing me to the ground with a loud crashing sound as metal met concrete. As I hadn't been expecting it, I hit my head and the pain was immeasurable. I whimpered, not wanting the man who raised me to hear the true extent of my pain.

"Don't worry, kitten. Soon you will learn. You will sing." Pulling on my hair to get me to look at him, my father spat in my face. There, I noticed the horrific scar across his face. I smirked, knowing that was my doing, and spat right back with the slime that coated my tongue from breathing through my mouth for so long. He dropped my head and this time I was able to save myself from the pain, although the effort I needed to hold my head up felt like I was lifting a semi-truck with my neck. My father then left, allowing another man in to put me upright.

~~~~~~

It felt like hours had passed as I sat alone in that lightless room. I was dehydrated and hungry and the pain in my head hadn't settled much. I was growing dizzy and tired, but I knew I had to stay awake if I wanted to live.

"Hungry, Miss Hoshino?" A man's calm voice made me look up from glaring at the floor, trying to concentrate on staying conscious. I watched him walk through a square of light with a tray of bread and water. The lights in the room flashed on and my eyes squinted at the glaring bulbs. I didn't recognise the man, but he didn't seem like the type to associate with my father. He was thin and not as tall as most men, from what I could see from my chair. His eyes were soft, but I knew not to trust that kind smile if he was allowed to wonder my father’s premises. Even to enter that vault-like room, which I had no knowledge of in my time there, he must have been a high-standing, well-trusted official in the gang. 

After him, followed someone with another chair, which the man sat in. He held a cup to my mouth, but I turned my head away from it. There was no way I would drink anything they offered me. Who knew what they put in it? Psychedelics or roofies. Anything to get my guard down.

"Do you want to live, Miss Hoshino?" The man's tone turned grave, but I didn't let his threat phase me. "If you want to live through this ordeal, you will drink and you will eat." He demanded, albeit with as soft a tone as any. 

‘Ordeal?’ My first semi-concious thought was a joking taunt at my own demise. I almost felt like laughing. If it wasn't for the pain thudding in my skull or the dire situation I was in, I might well have. This was far more than some ordeal. This was my nightmare, but also a frequent memory of my past. Maybe I didn't get locked in a room, trapped for hours on end, but I remembered the pain that didn't get treated for hours. I remembered the helplessness I felt, how pathetic I knew I was to just sit here and not being able to do anything to protect myself. I remembered counting the days between beatings and my father's rages, waiting for the next time I needed to lock away my tears so that he didn't get madder and hit me harder. 

However, I also knew he was telling the truth. I hadn't had much of a dinner because Juna was being picky and the meal she cooked took too long for me to eat with them. I had planned to eat something at the club, but that chance was far out the window. 

With the last of my determination used up, I turned back to him, not meeting his gaze. Softly, he held my chin as he tilted the cup towards my mouth. Then, silently, he fed me bits of bread- tasteless and stale. And when he was done, he was gone, the lights switching off again when the door closed, clunks of door bolts and key locks echoing from the other side as the only humane person I would ever see in that room left me to my punishment.

~~~~~~

A few more hours passed before that door opened again. This time, it was a large man with large muscles. He cracked his knuckles as he grinned at me. I knew what that stance meant, dread making me want to throw up the sustinance I had ingested some time before. I didn't know exactly how long I had been left in there alone, it was hard to keep track of time when your consciousness is wavering with every passing second, but I knew, or hoped, it had been a long time. Maybe Juna would notice I was missing. Maybe Noburu would call someone when he made it into work. What if he had walked in on the vandals first? What if he was bleeding out in the back room or the alleyway outside? What if he had called out to me for help and I didn't hear him? 

‘Let the hazing begin.’ I thought hopelessly, pushing the worries I knew I couldn't deal with right now to the side as he took each step towards me with growing intimidation.

~~~~~~

Hit after hit after hit, I continued to force my mouth shut. I couldn't let this man know I felt the pain he was pounding into me. I wouldn't let anymore have that satisfaction. I had been fading in and out of consciousness, but he always made sure I was awake enough to witness him torturing me. In some ways, that was the worst part.

"You'll bend to us soon." The man's deep voice announced in a slow drool as he pounded his fist into my stomach. If I had eaten anything more, I probably would have thrown up on him, but there was nothing in me to reject, save maybe my own blood that was surely trickling into my mouth, stomach, oesophagus and whatever other internal organ he had punctured.

Panting, the violence finally came to an end when the man noticed my consciousness fading for a final time. I could feel the bruises arising on my skin as my head hung low. Maybe I could feel blood pouring into places blood shouldn't be. I had no energy to watch him leave the room, lock the bolted door, and turn the lights off. With all my energy beaten out of me, I slipped into oblivion.

~~~~~~

A searing pain erupted from my leg and I was pulled out of the bottomless pit my mind had turned into. Caught off guard, I screamed out as my eyes flashed open. There, I found my father pushing his lit cigar into my bare thigh. I was still wearing the skimpy dress I was kidnapped in.

"This will teach you to intervene with daddy's work." Through gritted teeth, my father whispered over my cries.

"Stop! Please, stop!" I cried out, my voice hoarse and dry. But, despite my pleas, he just moved the cigar to a different spot on my leg, scorching my skin. If I could use any of my senses, I'm sure I would have smelt my flesh being cooked by the lit ash.

"Hurts, doesn't it? To feel and smell your skin cooking as you have no room for escape." When the cigar had burnt down to where he couldn't hold it anymore, he stepped back. That's when I noticed the medical trolley by the door. My vision was blurry from the tears that I shed and thehead injury I had sustained in my failed escape attempt, but I could make out there were a lot of sharp, shiny objects thrown carelessly onto it. 

"I warned you what would happen if you tried to leave, kitten. And I never go back on my promises." My father took a clean white rag from his suit pant pocket and wiped his hands clean of his sweat and the cigar ash as he took steps towards his torture equipment.

"Please... I haven't... done anything... to you." I took weak, long breaths as he sorted through the tools, trying to find the perfect one that suited his mood.

"You have done far more than nothing! My business is ruined! I have government men coming to my offices every day because of you. I can't even leave the house without being spotted." My father roared back, his face alive with sweat and rage. I jumped at memories of my past punishments as he picked up a pair of clamps. 

"You will learn to respect your father's work. And you will tell me where your mother is." As his steps echo closer, I felt my mind slipping again. My eyes clouded over as unbearable pain set my body on fire, but I still shivered in the icy, artificial air of the room.

~~~~~~

"Detective Kaga!" A woman came storming into our team room. My gaze shot up from the pictures in front of me and I glared, only to be shocked with what I saw. The same woman who I once taught at the academy, once presumed dead, stood there with a massive stomach. She was breathing heavily and her face was screwed up with worry. Behind her, I saw a man running in, asking her to calm down.

"Miss, if you could calm down-." Soma stood up to guide her away from me, but she only glared at him. I couldn’t tell if it was to ward him off or beg for his help.

"My sister's gone missing! Please, you have to help me find her!" She wailed as tears collected in her eyes. She was so distraught she hadn't even noticed the horrors that laid all over the office. Hundreds of pictures of crimes laid over the desks, but she wasn't phased. Then, I remembered the woman who screamed at me in the rock climbing centre.

"Miss, you need to go to reception." Ayumu tried to help Soma, but she pushed them out of her way.

"You are the only one that can help her. Please, she'll die if you don't find her!" Tears streamed down her face as she approached me. She bowed, despite the mass in her centre.

"Do you have to yell?" I grumbled and turned back to my work. For all I knew, this could be a pregnant woman's hormones making her worry too much.

Once I had spoken, her head shot up with a furious expression. "My sister is Atsuko Motomori. She saved your fucking life and this is how you repay her? By staring endlessly and pictures of murders and tortures?" She roared and I felt my body freeze up. 

For months, I had tried to forget about the girl who called herself my aide. I was furious that she had run into that hotel, only to die trying to do the right thing. I remembered seeing her in that hotel, smoke on the ceiling and her hateful voice shouting. I remembered being dragged down hallways as she begged me to stay awake. I remembered her deafeated laugh when she thought we were gone for good. 

Or at least I thought I did. Everyone had told me she never left that building. She was dead even though I remembered her kissing me and dragging me into that basement. It was so strange to see her face over and over again as I met the white-haired bouncer who interrupted our investigation months ago.

"Miss, please sit down." Ishigami entered the scene and wheeled a chair over to the woman.

"Not until you agree to find my sister." She glared at me and I sighed, nodding my head to the chair for her to sit down.

"Explain yourself." Ishigami sighed as the man who had entered with her held the woman's shoulder. He looked familiar, but I couldn't tell from where. I couldn't look at the woman as she slowly started to reveal her situation.

"My sister and I ran away from home. Our father is an evil man, I'm sure you know him. He's the one responsible for the bombing at that hotel..." I can feel her gaze bore into my back. "He's the head of the Hoshino mafia. When we escaped, Katsumi changed our names, our identities, even our pasts, and we split up. She said it would be more dangerous if we stayed together..." I could hear her tears escape her eyes as she made a strange squeaking sound. "But, I got kidnapped by my father. She saw me. Apparently you were on an investigation at the time..." She sighed and my eyes grew wide. ‘That woman with Takeda in the sweet shop was her?’

"We were able to meet at a cafe to discuss a plan to get me out. But my father had me followed and shot at us..." She bit her lip and the man held her hand. "She stayed behind to save those people. Then, when the hotel bombing happened, I waited for her at the back entrance like she said she would, but... She was late. She's never late. That's when I found you." The woman announced, I'm sure referring to me. "She wouldn't leave you in there. Even though you were too heavy to get out alone, she stuck by your side until I came along..."

"She changed her name again. Well, everyone thought she was dead, so she had to get her old passport... She delivered the evidence she collected when we lived with my father. Everything you have here is my sister's work. Even when my father would beat her, she never told him. Even when my mother went missing, she told me this was the only way to save us." She started to get emotional again and I picked up one of the pictures from my desk. The quality was poor, likely because it was old. I would have never thought a child could take these, though. I thought of my niece, a girl, young and annoying, being put through something this woman was suggesting Atsuko went through. My instincts roared with anger.

"Why do you think she's missing?" Ayumu interjected and I felt my heart stop. If she was involved with the gang we had been investigating, who knows what could have come of her.

"The club she works at was broken into. Her friend normally comes in first, but he said he was running late and had told Katsumi to set up without him. It has to be my father! There's no one else who would kidnap her in broad daylight!" I looked out at the sun setting on the horizon. Worry flooding my thoughts, wondering where she could be. 

Atsuko was alive.

~~~~~~

The cycle of punishment and feeding continued for the remainder of my time in that box. I lost all concept of time as the darkness appeared and disappeared as people came in and out. I would cry when I was alone and try my hardest not to when I wasn't. From what I could tell, my legs were black and blue with bruises and dirt and cigar ash.

Before the routine started, when I woke up for the first time, I felt liquid running down my forehead, but now all I felt was something dry on my skin. It was likely blood spilling from the head injury I endured when I tried to escape from that van. I had lost all hope. No one knew where I was. Juna wouldn't be dumb enough to call the police about my disappearance. Even if she was, there would be no way anyone could find me. Not in time, anyway. I knew I'd die in this room. Alone. Unidentified. And then thrown in the city river or buried in my father's yard, where he kept most of his victims. His trophies. To imagine the respect he would gain for killing his own daughter who had tried to rat him out...

Suddenly, the familiar clunk of the bolted door sounded and the door opened. The heavy footsteps of my father approached, but my head hung low. He grabbed the back of my hair and threw my head back.

"Have you given up yet, kitten? Will you tell me where your mother is?" My father smiled at my defeated body as I felt my heart race. My breathing quickened as I worried about what he was saying. Every time he came in here, he would ask me where my mother was. It confused me. I wondered if this was some sort of tactic to break me. To push me into reality.

"She's dead. You killed her." I gritted my teeth and he growled, throwing my head forward into the bucket of water he had brought in. I choked and spluttered, trying to blow the water out of my mouth. But, I was so caught off guard by the attack I breathed some in.

"Enough games, Katsumi! I know she got in contact with you. She wouldn't leave without giving you the chance." Pulling my head back up, I panted and coughed as he started to pace to room, airing out his anger. My mind started racing, water running down my face and eyes fluttering to stop the stinging. Did he actually not know where she was? Had he never found her?

"Boss!" A man came running through the door and I was intrigued, but I had no strength in my neck to lift my head and see his expression. 

I could tell he was panicked by the tone in his voice. My father grew angier, shouting about how “no one could enter this room without permission”. The two held a conversation and although I was within hearing range, my vision grew dizzy and water plugged my ears. I couldn't concentrate on what they were saying, but I could feel the liquid trickling down my forehead again.

~~~~~~

It took days to try and find evidence of where Atsuko was. There were security cameras outside the club she worked at, but the van she was pushed into was unmarked. Not to mention how popular the make was. We couldn't track it to an owner. That lead was dead the moment we watched the tapes. 

I went to every office building and house tied to the Hoshino mafia, but all I found was drugs and illegal money printing. Finally, Ishigami signed off on us storming the house Juna, Atsuko's sister, had told us they grew up in. It was a traditional Japanese style house, but Juna said there was a basement. They made their own electricity and didn't use the city's plumbing. They were completely off the grid.

Down a street that led off of the house surrounded by fields, we set up a base of operations for the raid. 

"We can't know what kind of equipment or security they have, so we need to be discreet." My team and Ishigami's team surrouned a table as we went over our plan.

"I’ll lead and find the moron. I know where she is." I announced and everyone looked at me with varying degrees of confusion. I couldn't say her name aloud, I wouldn't, not in this situation. I couldn't believe, didn't want to believe, that it was her trapped in that house. I wanted to think of her as the dumb rookie that died in that hotel, at least then her suffering would be over by now. But, for now, she would just be known as the moron.

"How could you possibly know that?" Ishigami complained with an annoyed look on his face. "-You know what, I don't want to know." He continued with a sigh before I could explain and I smirked. 

Soon enough, we were infiltrating the base.

~~~~~~

Once I had found my way through the house, the rest of our teams clearing the rest of the building, I discovered the entrance to their basement in a building in the rear of their land. It was an elevator, almost like something from an old mineshaft.

"Hyogo!" Ayumu called over, running across the lawn. I turned to him after I called the elevator up. If it was already at the bottom, someone had to be down there, so I kept an eye out for when it opened. 

"What if she's dead? From what her sister said-." Ayumu's expression didn't seem worried about the girl that had saved my life months before. Although, he was cut off by the severe look in my face. As we stared at each other, the elevator arrived.

Before I could react, Ayumu shot into it. I turned and saw an old man that I recognised, fall to the floor.

"That's Hoshino," Ayumu announced as we both let the man cry out in pain, blood spilling out around him. I looked back at him, wondering what he was going to do. We both knew what this man had done; to both his own family and strangers. We knew what he deserved. But, there was a voice in the back of my head that forced me to show him mercy.

"Get him medical assistance. He'll pay for his crimes in jail." I sighed, directing two detectives from our unit to carry the man out. Ayumu stared at me with a confused expression as I got into the elevator. Then, he smirked, like he knew something I didn’t, as the doors closed. All I could do was scowl.

~~~~~~

The doors opened once again in a long hallway. The walls were concrete and the lights were dim. There were five windowless, metal doors, the one at the end of the hall open a crack. I inched towards it, keeping an eye out for anyone planning to attack me. Soon, I reached the door and pushed it open with my foot, pointing my gun and flashlight ahead of me.

There, in the middle of the room, was a woman in a short dress. Her head was hung low, hair so wet it dripped into the bucket in front of her. However, I could see a dark red liquid leaking out of the crown of her head, turning the water red. Her legs were wounded with bruises and burn marks, as well as her arms and chest. I ran to her, kneeling down to hold her head up asI dropped my flashlight and gun to my sides. The only light I had to see her with was the flickering lights from the hallway.

It was Atsuko, or should I say, Katsumi Hoshino. She had a black eye and blood dripped down her pale face as I cupped her cheeks. Her lips were chapped and flaky, only making it harder for the little cuts to heal. I gulped as I felt her shallow breath on my face.

"Please... St... Stop." Her voice was frail and faint. Her mouth barely moved, making me question if she spoke at all.

Looking around, I saw her arms were bound to the arms of the metal chair and her ankles were tied to the legs of it. I untied her as quickly as I could and her body fell limply into mine.

"You moron." I sighed as my heart panged with guilt and... fear? I was afraid to lose her again. The happy go lucky imbecile who used to follow me around asking questions. I was afraid to let someone less die like this. Alone and cold.

Hooking my arms under her back and knees, I picked her up and ran back to the elevator. On the surface, Ayumu was waiting for me. He turned and was in shock of who I held.

"Is she dead?" He managed to say. 

Without a word, I ran towards the front of the house, hoping to get the ambulance in time to prove him wrong.

~~~~~~

At the hospital, I jumped off the ambulance as Katsumi was wheeled into the ER. The blood that was seeping out of her head was covering my shirt as I watched the doctors surround her. They pushed the defibrillator into her already fried skin. Her body jumped, but they had to go again.

"Detective Kaga!" I heard Katsumi's sister call out to me. Turning, I saw her running out of a car that had followed us from the scene. She insisted on coming with us, even in her state, which meant Soma had to look after her. 

"Did you find her?" She pleaded as she grabbed my shirt, noticing the blood staining it. Her eyes filled with tears as I looked back to where the pregnant woman's sister had been, but I noticed them wheeling her away.

~~~~~~

Days passed since I heard about any change in Katsumi's condition. She survived the surgery for her internal bleeding and cracked ribs. She received treatment for her concussion. But she still hadn't woken up.

"Her brain is protecting itself. She endured days of torture and pain. It will take time for her to wake up again." The surgeon reported to Juna. I had come with Naruko, Katsumi's old friend, to visit and overheard their conversation before we could make ourselves known. Naruko had become my new aide since the incident, but she wasn't nearly as good as Atsuko was. She was always getting distracted and tired from the long days. But, Ishigami told me to bear with her because she had lost her friend.

"What will happen when she does wake up?" Juna asked, her voice frail. The surgeon hesitated before answering. 

"...Will she wake up?" Juna asked again when the man didn't answer her question.

"I'm sorry. But with the trauma her body went through, it's unlikely." The doctor sighed and the woman fell to her knees. Her boyfriend ran to her side and the doctor excused himself.

"Detective, I don't think now is a good time." The man in charge of Atsuko's care explained to me with a stern expression. I felt Naruko tearing up beside me. I nodded, turning to my new servant. 

"Are you going to interrupt them?" I asked her but she just shook her head, knowing it would be rude and incredibly inappropriate. We turned to leave as we listened to the sister's wailings echo down the hallway.

[bscully]

Do you think the moonlight boy got raped during the Charlotte sex scene? He did leave to see his mommy after that, and he is semi-concious when Griffith controls him, otherwise he couldn't have saved his mommy in the Hill of Swords. Could you expand on the thematic and storytelling implications of this? Since I can already think of a couple.

Hello and thanks for the ask! Sorry for the long wait.

Oooh this is an interesting thought. I’m not sure if the moonlight boy experienced this first-hand, I think it’s safer to assume that Griffith and the Moonlight Boy have a shared memory, similarly to Guts still remembers slaining his first Makara/whale familiar while going Berserk and used that knowledge in battle in chapter 266:

Like... when one part is active, the other is semi-asleep or partially unconscious. But at the same time, I also have to say that Guts is semi-conscious here and did not lose himself completely yet (he lost himself shortly after the Makara was slain), which could be why he was remembering, too. Check this article for a in-depth analysis Now whether Moonlight Boy remembers or not (there is a chance that he does), I think this memory would definitely disturb him. Imagine if you sleep walk everyday and somehow end up having sex with someone you don’t even know and who is so much older than you. That seems super fucked up and horrifying! Now also consider the moonlight boy is still a child, too. Perhaps not a 100% human child, but a child nonetheless. It’d also continue the theme that many Berserk characters, such as Charlotte, Casca, Guts and Griffith himself made negative experiences with sex. It is also true that Griffith saved Casca during the Hill of Swords for the sole reason that part of him (Moonlight Boy/Demon Infant) was emotionally affected seeing BOTH of his parents be in danger like this.

This is most interesting because Griffith wanted to figure out whether he feels any guilt or remorse seeing Guts (since he sacrificed him and the Hawks after all) and found out that the infant inside of him still makes him feel things. “My blood should have been frozen”. Which has you wondering: How much of Neo-Griffith has done so far was actually himself, and how much was more the Moonlight Boy’s doing? In episode 358, was agreeing to the construction of an orphanage Griffith’s will because of practicality reasons, or was it the Moonlight Boy’s desire and empathy towards others who cannot experience the warmth of their parents’ like himself?

Did Griffith save all these women in chapter 291 because of the Moonlight Boy? Or was that cold calculation...? Like, to keep the population at Falconia growing?

Or maybe is it so that both Neo-Griffith’s and Moonlight Boy’s interests/desires are currently being pursued, kinda like a symbiotic relationship? Does Neo-Griffith “argue” with the Moonlight Boy over which goals to pursue? Does Femto have to make compromises in his plans because of that...? Because of the ambiguity, there are some very interesting scenarios that can play out in this regard: Such as that Neo-Griffith actually does turn out to be a “positive savior” instead of a full-fletched Anti-Christ precisely because of the Moonlight Boy’s presence and influence. 

[secretswritteninink-a]

Kidnapping

Starter for @shaymaverickobsidian

They snuck in in the middle of the night. It wasn't easy. The small family was currently staying in Zaria's childhood home, the cave in which lived the entire Nevar pack of wolfshifters. They though it would be safe here, surrounded by a hundred wolf shifters and one quite volatile fire demon, but the people creeping into wolf territory this late at night had ways around that.

"How are we going to pull this off?" whispered the teenaged apprentice at the older hunter's side. This one was not after Zaria's power or the Dragonhearts influence so he could use it as his own. No, he wanted to eradicate them like his family had eradicated the dragons of the past. It was a tragedy one egg and one family had slipped through their grasps. If it hadn't been for that, they wouldn't be dealing with their damned kind now. "Dragons have no weaknesses and there's a hundred wolves in there. Not to mention the spider demon's daughter. We'll die before we ever get a chance to kill them."

The hunter shook his head, turning his grim gaze back to the boy. He couldn't really blame him for his doubts. The kid was his newest recruit and this was his first mission. Doubt was normal. But it must also be quickly squashed before it turned incapacitating.

"Oh, dragons do have one weakness. Their children. And as for the wolves and the fire demon, well I have something just for that," he replied.

Hoisting some kind of odd machine, he crept close to the front of the cave. The Nevar pack had left two teenagers as sentries tonight. Usually, they left someone older with them too but he was no where to be found, leaving the kids to fall asleep. He had reply picked the most opportune night.

Setting the machine down, he loaded it with some sort of crushed powder, mixing it with the water that was already inside until it turned a ruddy brownish pink. The starlight poppy. A rare plant that now only existed in his clutches, grown on the hidden property of the Vanderburgh hunters. When turned into a vapor form or ingested, it could make even the most powerful demon's sleep. The only downside was that it didn't work on dragons as well, making them drowsy and disoriented but still concious. It didn't work on humans either though, which made it a valuable resource for the Vanderburgh hunters.

The pinkish vapor spilled into the cave, quickly knocking out anyone who might still be stirring inside and ensuring anyone already asleep didn't wake up until well into the day tomorrow. Once they were confident no demons would interfere with their plan, he waved a handful of Vanderburgh hunters forward and lead them into the cave.

Zaria slept deep in the Nevar cave, in the same cavern she slept in as a child though now it was her husband and son that accompanied her there instead of her parents who now slept only a couple "rooms" away. It was one of the most protected, most defensible places in the whole cave and allowed the pack and Zaria's parents to keep her safe and out of harm's way if need be. Except for tonight, when the starlight poppy kept them all blissfully unaware of the invasion.

The hunters crept into the back cavern, forming a small semi-circle around the two adult dragons still sleeping. They lifted what appeared to be some sort of gun, ready for action in case the adults woke before they could get the child away. Whole the hunter and his apprentice moved towards the boy, who stirred in his sleep.

The hunter pressed a gloved hand tightly over his mouth, quickly lifting him in the air. Lucas startled awake but the pink fog filling the room muddled his senses. He couldn't smell anything but the flower and the room spun around him. Even his hearing felt like it was muffled but he still made out the Hunter's voice and he commanded his apprentice to follow him. Unfamiliar voices. Dangerous voices. He tried to cry out to his parents but the hand over his mouth was tight and muffled any sounds. So, he did the next best thing and bit the man. His teeth poked through his gloves and Lucas tasted blood on his fangs for the first time but the hunter held fast as he quickly maneuvered out of the cavern Lucas had called home.

[pfandghoul]

what the sokovia accords really are

a quick study bc what the fuck guys

(copied from the mcu wiki entry about the accords - all of it and not just parts of it)

here goes:

The currently known regulations established by the Sokovia Accords include:

Any enhanced individuals who agree to sign must register with the United Nations and provide biometric data such as fingerprints and DNA samples.

- Any who AGREE to sign. I dont think this is asking too much. If ur working for a government agency, if ur using force in any way during ur work, I think its fair to ask you to give them biometric data. And if its only so in case there is an investigation afterwards (which their always should be imo) its clear distinguishable who was where and did what.

- Also, what if someone suddenly decides "something happened, im changing sides, imma take revenge" (no matter if its a concious decision or brainwashing 👀)? Would probably be good to have some data and perhaps be able to track them. If its managable or not- hm. But theres no harm in giving that data if ur only goal is working towards a safer world.

-----

Those with secret identities must reveal their legal names and true identities to the United Nations.

- Oh nooo, no unknown vigilantes that might make mistakes while fighting on their own and then cant be held accountable? No one is perfect, OF COURSE, but from a realistic pov I wouldnt feel safe with someone running around fighting whoever-

And I know we love the romantic comic fantasy of "everybody can be a hero", and I swear I love it as much as you! But imagine ur just a normal person while spiderman is swinging above ur head- or even imagine ur spiderman- and then one tiny thing wents wrong. The normal person is crushed, dead or paralysed- Spiderman is in shock because that was Not supposed to happen and he is so so sorry!- But what now?

- If enhanced people were to work under an organisation (that is ideally not as shady and riddled with Hydra as Shield was) then those incidents would be covered. Yes it would still be terrible but Spiderman would get mandatory therapy session to work through it and the normal person... well if theyre dead then i guess the organisation would at least pay for the funeral and compensate the family (like if they were the only one providing for partner and kids), additionally a conversation between both partys if possible.

-Basically: nothing can be swept under the rug. The enhanced people can be protected!!! PLUS they only have to reveal their identity to the UN and not the world.

---------

Those with innate powers must submit to a power analysis, which will categorize their threat level and determine potential health risks.

- This would benefit the person with power too, you realize that, dont you?

You cant possibly know how much power you actually have. Is there gonna be another level-up for you? Are you Jean Grey? We wouldnt want to repeat that specific clusterfuck, right?

But if you submit to an analysis it can help find ways to train you, circle ur weaknesses, etc.

Yes the UN would know ur threat level- and that would be bad why? Are you planning to attack Them? If not then no problem. Instead they would know if they should send you in or not- depending... you dont need a level 5 when there is a cat in a tree. We want to avoid unnecessary damage, thank you. If ur a level 1 you also dont want to be on the front lines against an alien invasion for example- better help evacuate non-powered individuals and not die immediately.

- Also worth mentioning: this is all still part of the "if you agree to sign" paragraph

-------

Those with innate powers must also wear tracking bracelets at all times.

- Yes I admit this one sucks. I could argue the pros but I dont really want to because this one is literally just a "we want to control you" rule and should be scratched.

------- (new paragraph in the accords)----

Any enhanced individuals who sign are prohibited from taking action in any country other than their own, unless they are first given clearance by either that country's government or by a United Nations subcommittee.

- I really want to think I dont have to say anything here but I feel I do.

No I do not want a guy wearing an american flag running around in my country if my government didnt explicitely allow it. Same for a giant tin man or a creepy spiderlady.

- If anything then this paragraph would help improve the communication between countries. Yes people fear that in emergencies this will all take too long but 1) thats not the Accords fault and 2) I think we already have situations like this irl and most times it does work.

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Governments are forbidden from deploying enhanced individuals outside of their own national borders, unless those individuals are given clearance as described above. The same rule also applies to non-government organizations that operate on a global scale (including S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Avengers).

- Same reasoning. I really really dont want Shield around with their shady everything.

- And always needing consent before weaking havoc in other countries? nice

--------(new paragraph)-----

Any enhanced individuals who do not sign will not be allowed to take part in any police, military, or espionage activities, or to otherwise participate in any national or international conflict, even in their own country.

- Basically if you dont sign up then you cant be a super-cop. Groundbreaking.

(This is very much explained in the first paragraph already.)

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As a corollary, they will not be allowed to participate in any active missions undertaken by private or governmental law enforcement/military/intelligence organizations (such as S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Avengers).

- s a m e t h i n g

--------(new paragraph)-----

Any enhanced individuals who use their powers to break the law (including those who take part in extralegal vigilante activities), or are otherwise deemed to be a threat to the safety of the general public, may be detained indefinitely without trial.

If an enhanced individual violates the Accords, or obstructs the actions of those enforcing the Accords, they may likewise be arrested and detained indefinitely without trial.

- Cancel the without trial part and then Id say its just. This way it stinks and I feel Ross had his hands in this. No, I am not defending this one. Its Not Okay.

------(new paragraph)-------

The use of technology to bestow individuals with innate superhuman capabilities is strictly regulated, as is the use and distribution of highly advanced technology (such as Asgardian and Chitauri weaponry).

- You cant just experient and turn urself into the Hulk anymore??? Where is the fun in that?? //sarcasm//

- I dont need to go deeper into this, do I?

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The creation of self-aware artificial intelligences is completely prohibited.

- Here comes a problem. For Tony mostly.

- I can think of a few reasons for this but I dont think many people are even capable of doing this. I think it would bd enough to file a request if you want to try and build an AI.

--------(new paragraph)----

The Avengers will no longer be a private organization and will operate under the supervision of the United Nations.

- See.. all of the above on why this is a good thing?

- The Avengers as a private organisation is actually a super scary thought. And if you arent at least a little freaked out about this (all from the point of looking at this as if it were real) then idk what to tell you.

---------(new paragraph)-------

For the purposes of the Accords, an "enhanced individual" is defined as any person, human or otherwise, with superhuman capabilities. This includes individuals whose powers are an innate function of their biology as well as individuals who utilize highly advanced technology to grant themselves superhuman capabilities. However, individuals with advanced prostheses do not seem to be considered "enhanced", even if their prostheses give them capabilities beyond those of ordinary humans. 

- Basically just explaining what they mean by "enhanced individual": people with powers. Doesnt matter if you are born with ur power or built urself a supersuit.

-If you got leg protheses that are super bouncy you arent considered an "enhanced individual" (to put it as simple as possible).

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All members of the Avengers are subject to the same conditions as enhanced individuals, even if they are not enhanced themselves: Black Widow was required to sign so she could continue serving on the Avengers, and Hawkeye was incarcerated on the Raft after violating the Accords.

- I think this is fair because if you consider urself an Avenger and fight with them then you also should be held accountable.

- You wouldnt want a Someone to work in super-person capacity which both gives a great deal of responsibility and allows a high chance of fuck ups and destruction without them having any regulations, okay?

AND THATS ALL THERE IS

THATS ALL THE MCU WIKI SAYS THERE IS

Which is ofc bullshit because the Accords were thick and 117 countries worked on them for idk how long. Do you understand what that takes? The compromises and politic battles thats been fought over this document?

And yes it is still not perfect.

But who in the seven Hells said that this was the final draft? Who??

"I dont wanna sign away my freedom of choice" F you! What about my freedom of choice of having some costumed weirdos run around my town blowing stuff up killing people?

"We cant save everyone" yEAH but maybe just mAyBe if you werent a dumb cunt then mayyybe with some teamwork with the countries respective secrurity personell (as every fucking country does have) then maybe Kyle, Maria and Dembe would still be alive?? Who knows.

So what I hear is "I dont wanna give up my freedom and continue to do as I see fit. Because I think I am a better judge than a UN committee and 117 governments that dont want me breaking into their countries on a semi-regular basis."

and thats why im generally pro-Accords :)

[intraxvagor]

@veraquen​ || continued from here

He’s thought of it twice before, twice unsuccessful in execution. Aden had become perhaps the most familiar face around Skyhold to him since Mihtriel used to wander the courtyards and Faeron had grown quite accustomed to his presence. He was kind, despite his many flaws. He seemed to understand more deeply than others; his empathy undoubtedly set him apart from any other. Despite himself, the healer had grown quite sentimental, and felt deep in his heart the same pull he’d felt only for a select few in his lifetime. Seeing Aden made him happy. Speaking with him overwhelmed him with satisfaction, on most occasions. It was indescribable, this situation, and perplexing in both its wrongness and rightness. It seemed to dare him to leap from his comfort zone into the realm of possible endings; he feared to make a mistake. Yet he never would know unless he committed the act.   They’re leaning on the ramparts side by side, overlooking the mountains. Aden’s bracerstink against the stone every once in a while with his movement, but otherwise they are in silence, save for the faraway cacophony of courtyard chatter. There was not much to say today. Faeron had lost a patient in the morning who’d arrived too late to receive treatment, and the Templar’s wonderful resilience in training had him in some sort of deep, subconscious mental preparation for whatever was to come next; no doubt he’d depart tomorrow on some sort of patrol. His eyes are looking to the distant cliffsides, but they seem vacant, and unfocused on the present.   Everyone liked to comment on Faeron’s confidence. His tongue was sharp for someone so uneducated, and he spoke loud and clear despite his accented tones. He walked with his shoulders back as if he were human and his very aura seemed to give off the impression he knew what he was doing, much to the gratitude of his patients. So why did it seem so difficult to do this? Head turns towards his friend, watching him quietly and closely. Perhaps the risk of offending him had steadied his hand thus far, or perhaps he just hadn’t known until recently. It made him anxious, really. He’d had relations with men before in Orlais, but always for favours, or for work. It had never been personal; he’d never felt the way he did presently. It was important for him to detach these past experiences from Aden in order to progress, sure, but pursuing what he wanted would mean a complete re-evaluation of himself and his preferences. If he did it now though, when it was least expected, at least he might give himself the advantage of surprise so that he could abort just as quickly.    Swallowing thickly, lightheaded and heart fluttering, Faeron removes his hands from the stone barrier and reaches out to Aden, his left hand gliding smoothly under the other’s chin and cupping the right side of his face. His right hand rests lightly upon Aden’s left shoulder and remains there as he carefully but confidently guides the other to face him, drawing his focus precisely where he wanted it. He wanted to kiss him. And he would now, lips coming seamlessly together, warm and soft and the human’s stubble tickling his cheek. He closes his eyes tight because he doesn’t want to see the other’s reaction, as he fears anger or offence, withdrawal or disgust. His hand wavers along Aden’s jaw as his fingertips quiver with nervousness, and thus he removes it, tucking it in close to his own body as though he’d been burnt. His lips are frozen with the time and he withdraws soon after his hand leaves, that worrisome thought in his mind screaming that he’d gone on for too long.  Reopening his eyes, the elf backs up, returning that gap between them. He looks to Aden for a split second before averting his eyes, looking back over the edge of the ramparts though focusing on absolutely nothing in particular, darting from mountaintop to mountaintop. He may as well have signed away whichever trust they had between them, if any at all.        “Sorry – ” he breathes out hastily, flipping his braid over his shoulder. The urge to leave it there, but his feet feel like they weigh a hundred pounds each.  “I…. I really don’t know why I did that. I’m sorry.”

The Templar had gotten word of loss in the infirmiry, another man overcome by his injuries. Demons had taken their toll on their people, but so had many other conditions, leaving them all the lesser for the loss. Aden wished he didn't fail his people so, every loss feeling like another set back in the march ever forward, but he had to accept that loss was just part of the  nature of the beast. They had raised an army with the expectation that people were going to fight, and with that came the loss of life. It wasn't something easy to handle, but Aden could at least ease the concious of those still living. Pyres burned with semi-regularity, the smoke off of them blending with the smoke  from the living.

Aden had gone to seek out Faeron, worried that the patient had indeed been the elf's, and indeed it had been. The man had been far beyond the aid of anyone here in the Inquisition, and his passing had been one of the many that they had needed to accept. Aden wished he could offer some sort of real comfort to the elf despite being somewhat unable to understand. The man had that need to help others, tied his success in the wellness of the life he touched, and Aden couldn't imagine the failure he must feel as being unsuccessful. The young noble assumed that it was possibly akin to the same sensation he felt when a mage had failed their harrowing, the failure to keep the young apprentice safe... All Aden could do for certain was offer his presence and ear if Faeron needed it. Death deserved respect, and so did the reactions of those still remaining to life. A passing effected everyone whom had touched that life.

Such thoughts had led Aden to think along similar lines, but on a different path. He would be dispatched for another hot spot and every time he went out he risked his life. Aden put himself under the same risks as he asked of his men, thus there was the same chance he would be unlucky. Aden had the training to accept that, to know that the risks had to be assessed and accepted. He had weighed himself against the people he protected, and he was happy to present himself as an alternative even as he fought to win. Aden was certain that the man whom had been lost likely had similar thoughts, a want to help, a desire to make a difference somehow. That sort of idealism ran deep in the blood of the Inquisition, something he thought might ease the affected healer. Aden merely had a hard time putting that drive to words, an explanation that resonated loudly throughout his being without need to be defined. Hands that could be of use, perhaps that would be the best way? How did hands that dealth death comfort ones that gave life? Aden regretted many a life he had ended, though often he felt some sort of vindication or reasoning for it. Every time he went out, he came up against another he had to end, another life brought up short. How did he ease himself of that stain? Often it was the understanding that their cause was just, or that he was freeing another from frenzied madness.

Yet would the healer accept such a comfort? Would he be understanding of the need to risk the spark they so direly fought to keep within a chest? Aden hoped he could say something that might aid the other, as he could see that Faeron was agitated. Something was weighing heavily on the mind of the elf, and logic would assume he lingered over his unfortunate task. It seemed to reach a peak, and Aden came to a halt, wondering what words might burst from the Orlesian's lips. He did not anticipate the guiding pressure that turned him. At first, the Templar stiffened, wondering what Faeron was about, but as lips touched his own, he felt himself start in a bit of pleased surprise. A forward move for the healer, though one that took a great deal of his will to pursue if the quiver of his hand was anything to go by. Faeron snatched it back almost as swiftly as he had placed it, leaving Aden's skin sparking with fleeting touch, a sensation contrasting with the almost wooden nature of the elf's lips. Aden felt a flare of understanding simmer across of his mind, and he let Faeron retreat as he needed.

The elf was terrified. Terrified that he had overstepped an unspoken line, terrified that he had done something wrong and thus broken an understanding they had come to. Aden needed to act fast to assure the other, but pushing too far would also work against him. This was a delicate a dance as another instance, this time Aden on the outskirts seeking a safe path. Unfortunate that eloquence was outside of his grasp. He'd just have to muttle through the best he could and prey it worked.

"You did it because you wanted to," Aden bent himself slightly to the side to try to catch Faeron's averted gaze, an action that also brought him a half step closer, ",which is nothing to sorrowful about." Aden reached out in kind, touching the other's sharper chin to bring it up. "Now I'd like to share another with you, if you don't protest?"