#they arent they are severely mentally ill

[skippersthecat]

I wonder how Kusuke felt about never being visited or even contacted by his family for 4 whole years. Then the first time they do its not even because they want to see him. It's because he's the only one who can fix Kusuo's limiters. His family hasnt seen him in 4 years and when they finally do its for Kusuo.

That must've hurt so bad. He already felt worthless compared to his brother, and now probably thinks he can't even win his parents' love. I wonder if that's part of the reason he ran away in the first place.

It's probably a big reason why he resents Kusuo so much. Kusuke clearly loves his brother and doesn't want to seriously harm him, but I think he part of him does want to hurt Kusuo a little out of anger and envy. He wants to win so badly because then maybe he will receive the same amount of affection Kusuo gets.

It's tragic because this is how Kusuke views his brother, when it's not the truth. Kusuo is also used by his parents to fix their problems and has his feelings ignored time and time again. He isn't being adored the way Kusuke thinks, but Kusuke doesn't see this and resents his brother for the perceived favoritism.

[dennisboobs]

i'm. i can't do proper metas until i actually have the time to do them. but i will eventually dig further into charlie and bonnie's relationship and mac and his mom's. its stewing.

[gibbearish]

tells my boyfriend im overwhelmed lately bc ive had 0 alone time for almost a full month now bc we have a friend staying with us until we can get set up in the new house and he goes "oh yeah that sucks im sorry :(( but hey soon ill be working till 10 every night just like (roommate) so whenever we both work youll have most of the day to urself!" i go hide in the closet come out to make a drink and he sits in the kitchen and silently watches me make the drink the entire time

[slayhamkennedy]

.

[andillbeancuteboyifiwantto]

betrayal incarnate wrong puberty damaging my ribs my lungs causing blood to spill monthly frail body since childhood living inside a frame that isn’t mine biggest stab in the back from what’s meant to protect me most right now it’s like i’m dying and i don’t think it’s purely physical and or anymore stress, anxiety of it makes it worst god i want ignorance healthcare costs too fucking much can’t heal the body if you can’t treat the mind you can’t treat the mind, without major physical tactics weak lungs throttle my oxygen as well the weight that doesn’t belong on my ribs paired with a fine aged childhood mental illness stress that probably has become parasitical long ago i stopped wanting to die but it sure seems like i’m doomed betrayal incarnate look up the symptoms another doom scrolling really though i just want to not know if this judas is going to keep trying can it just be peaceful, painless a sugar sweet ignorance till demise happens

[wendynerdwrites]

If I didn't think Somerton was a scumbag before...

According to Gita Jackson, one of his biggest plaguarism targets, he's done exactly nothing to reach out to them or other victims. According to Kat, Hbomb's editor/researcher, he has not reached out to them about contributing to the fund. You'd think if fixing his mess was his main priority, he'd have done THAT before making a video.

This twit spent years stealing, launching harassment campaigns against his critics, dolling out misinformation that targetted women, lesbians, transmascs, NB's, WWII soldiers, Bisexuals, Asexuals and SURVIVORS OF THE GODDAMN AIDS EPIDEMIC while fetishizing Nazis and blowing smoke up the ass of a CEO scumbag. Oh, and setting himself up as a representative of the queer community despite going out of his way to shit all over about 85% of it.

How do we think the victims of his plagairism and harassment felt? Their mental health probably suffered severely when they got trashed and labeled as bigots when they tried to defend themselves and their work.

There is no way Somerton did not know he hurt people when he took active measures to do so.

He did not take active measures to actually fix things. He couldn't even be assed to provide a link to HBomb's fund for his victims in his video description.

He should not hurt himself. No one ever should. And I dont want to see harm come to him. Just earned comeuppence. DEATH or self harm doesn't fall into that category. I wish him a full recovery.

But aside from that, I also wish for all of his ill gotten gains to go to all he has hurt. I wish for him to leave the internet permanently. I wish for him to never be allowed into the fields of media study or entertainment again and be laughed out of the room if he ever tries again. I wish for an investigation into his "film studio."

The fact that he opened his so called apology talking about his self-harm/su*cide is sheer manipulation. He minimized his actions throughout his so called apology, blamed his misinformation and bigotry on his partner, and put his patreon up again. and anyone who buys that "It's so you can unsubscribe!" line is a moron. All he has to do to make sure people who hate him now arent charged is to shut it down completely. But instead, he makes his ex-fans do the work for him. And we know why.

The man's first priorities in his so called quest to make it right isn't to reach out to his victims, help with their funding, or even raise awareness of the funds for them. It was to film himself downplaying and making excuses for his actions and to reactivate his Patreon.

If that doesn't tell you who he is, I don't know what to tell you.

[schizopositivity]

how to advocate for schizophrenics and psychotics in every day life:

correct people when they misuse the word "psychotic" (as in if they use it in any other way but a serious disconnect from reality, delusions or hallucinations)

correct people when they use the word "schizophrenic" as an adjective (its not!!! its a severe and persistant mental disorder)

correct people when they call people "crazy" aka "shes been acting crazy lately" (they likely dont actually mean it and this word is thrown around a lot, but as a schizophrenic im asking you to not use this word to describe people since this has been tied to me and my fellow psychotics for ages)

do not assume that a psychotic person is dangerous in any way (psychotic people are more likely to be the victims of abuse than be the abusers)

when talking about mental illness or the mental illness community as a whole consider, does this apply to psychotic and schizophrenic people as well? (if not, youre not talking about the whole community! its that simple)

do not purposley trigger someones paranoia aka telling people that theres someone after them (this is always harmful and potentially life threatening, its not a joke and never was)

dont assume schizophrenia is "just hallucinations and delusions" (its much more than that, it has negative and cognitive symptoms as well, which for some people is much worse than the positive symptoms of hallucinations and delusions)

dont make lobotomy jokes aka "lobotomize me" jokes (these procedures were used to turn schizophrenics into "pets" so that other people could better deal with us, its not a joke)

dont act "crazy" for shock value aka wide eyes, rocking back and fourth, shaking (our mannerisms arent for you to pretend to be crazy with, this is who we actually are, im looking at you rock bands)

dont fear the people on the street talking to themselves aka calling the cops on them (these people are suffering, these people need help, them being psychotic doesnt make them any more dangerous than anybody else)

dont use the word delusional for every idea you dont agree with aka "that conservative politician is delusional!" (delusions specifically describe strongly held beliefs outside of reality, not just beliefs outside youre specific world view)

dont expect people to express emotions the same way you do aka "why arent you reacting?" (many schizophrenics stuggle with flat affect and cant change it, it doesnt mean we dont feel things, just that we dont express them the same way)

dont expect us to be able to do the same amount of, or intensity of work you do aka "i work 5 days a week, you have it easy!" (executive disfunction is very common in schizophrenia, it doesnt make us lazy, we are just disabled)

dont post derealization without tagging it or TWing it as such aka that post with a fake european country saying that americans dont even know what country this is (we already struggle enough with figuring out whats real and whats not we dont need "pranks" or "jokes" trying to fool us without any TW)

dont assume schizophrenic and psychotic people cant see your post or view your media or anything else (we are real people interacting with the world just like everybody else, we can see your jokes about us, or your media portraying us as dangerous, we arent fictional characters)

dont assume youre superior to, or smarter than us (once again we are real people, we deserve the same respect as anyone else on the planet)

dont call someones delusion stupid aka "obviously youre not the reincarnation of kurt cobain thats stupid" (you have no idea how real these are for us, they dont always make sense to you but they do to us, please respect that)

dont ask if were hallucinating right now (its none of youre business! and if we say yes youll likely ask where it is, and if we show you youll likely look in the direction of the hallucination which is dangerous, it blends the real world with the hallucination and its already hard enough for us to tell the difference)

dont stop trusting us and what we say just because were psychotic (we still deserve to be listened to and trusted just like everybody else)

learn about less talked about symotoms like catatonia, avolition and word salad (these are just as common as the talked about ones, but just less talked about cause i guess it doesnt make for an intresting horror movie)

learn more about schizophrenia and psychosis from actual schizophrenics and psychotics (a great example is the podcast Inside Schizophrenia, scrolling through this blog, looking up students with psychosis)

TLDR: no go back and read it, its the least you could do

[googiekitsch]

haii. hellowwwwe introducing Meee :3

🔴 im kaz!

🔸19 (bday on april 1st!!!!)

🟡 he/him, dont refer to me by they/them please. also im an aro gay guy lawl

❇️ hispanic + latino 🇵🇷

🌀 im an artist and cartoonist! im a full time art student and i am very passionate about character design and illustration. im also developing a comic, and im very passionate about storytelling!

🟣 i have several mental disorders and dont do very well with social interaction, please forgive me if im not very talkative or communicative @_@

💖 my i have a lot of interests but the main ones are my ocs, flightless birds, reptiles, various design aesthetics of the 80s-90s like factory pomo and global village coffeehouse, theme park history, venture bros, metalocalypse, horror media, cartoons from the 2000's, and music like new wave, prog rock and funk metal (i loveee mr bungle, ween and primus dont even get me started). i love music a lot so if you have any recommendations feel free to send them over to me ^_^

please dont follow me if youre under 15, also if you're a pr0shipper/'anti-anti' or a t3rf or a zi0nist or anything similar (censoring because tumblr is annoying) Get Off My Page Forever

though i do get jokey and less serious here sometimes, i also want to make it known that i will always try to use my platform to boost the voices of people who are suffering at the hands of injustice and oppression. im very fortunate to live the life that I do and making my followers aware of issues that arent as widely reported on is very important to me. if youre one of those people who only likes it when people on here goof off all the time and you 'get annoyed' when people actually try to raise awareness about serious issues, then youre not someone i want to be associated with frankly

i ask that you refrain from acting too overly familiar with me like referring to me as your friend when we've never really talked, stuff like that. im really sensitive to stuff like that and seeing people act like that towards me just kinda icks me out. please respect me and my boundaries

thats about it i think! uhh yeah. my other socials are belowwww if you wanna go follow me on those places! have a nice one ok bye

twitter / youtube / toyhouse / art blog / kofi / insta (not super active there, i just use it to talk to my friends jsyk

also if you wanna get in touch with me the easiest way is to dm me on discord! my username over there is papaplasmic. i tend not to use the dm features on other apps including tumblr so if you wanna talk with me thats the easiest way as im always on there. just know that sometimes i wont respond to stuff just because talking with people i dont really know isnt something im up for all the time :P but ill try to respond if i can

[livingzomboy]

"Schizoposting" (said by a neurotypical edgelord who thinks hes hot shit) mfs when i start talking about how im actually dead and all my disabilities are because of my body starting rot late and the government wants to get their hands on my- wait what do you mean crazy dangerous freak? Arent you schizo? No you dont know what its like to experience reality in the horrifying way i do and you just want to demonize and poke fun at schizospecs, or even worse you want to intentionally trigger us so you have a fucking laugh. people make me SICK.

TLDR; Wishing all non-schizospec "Schizoposters" a very good development of severe mental illness that destroys your life and future

[no-stupid-questions-official]

howwww do you meet people as a young adult like both dating and friendships. please dont just say “go out and talk to people” thats all i ever get when i try to ask for help and i have several mental illnesses that advice is not compatible with. and dating apps arent working either

if the only thing is talking to people please at least tell me HOW like i mean really lay it out for me step by step. sorry im just so frustrated trying to ask people for help with this and only getting extremely neurotypical responses

-

[exxistential-nightmare]

God I really wish ppl wud b mor aware/accepting of how non binary evrything is. EDs may be a mental illness but they have severe life long phys health effects that in my brain count at least sum of em as cpunk. There r physical disabilities that effect the brain/development more and do very littoe to warrant use of "cripple" as a reclaimation. Have strict boundaries that r 'immutable' dosnt work, ppl arent able 2 b categorised like that, especially disabled ppl.

[topazpearl]

So remember my big sbg theory doc? forget that existed, heres the new one

Discusses up to Ep 61. Fast-pass spoiler FREE

Content discussions about death, mental illness, sui.cide; yknow. Heavy Thriller webtoon stuff (tm)

[Hamilton chorus voice] NUMBER ONE: Giant freakin phantompedes and how to escape them

-I was right about the football field lights to try to kill them idea yippee

-HOEWVERR, theres so many attacking the school rn and its freaking collapsing?? I literally dont know how they’re gonna get outta this

-Unless (unless) my Phantom Ashlyn theory is relevant, ashlyn can talk to them and tells them to go away and they… do! idk lol it's stupid but maybe ash has enough girl boss energy to convince them. or theyre so shocked by a human talking to them theyre like "dang ok". Could still happen! 

NUMBER TWO: Phantom Transformation Theory

So it’s Basically confirmed: 

If you die in the PD, you start to turn into a Phantom.

Of course we wont know for sure until we actually SEE it but like, Aiden’s creepy af smile and basically coming back to life in ashlyn’s arms after DYING it’s like, basically confirmed. 

Ash wonders why Aiden snapped out of his seizure so fast compared to Tyler. Severity of injuries could definitely be a factor (tho like, im assuming Aiden got freaking blunt force trauma brain damage which, to me, is just as bad as being impaled). Another factor could be that Tyler died only about 30 minutes into the Time, while Aiden died almost right when it ended. And… we saw how fast Aiden started to “turn”. Red technically never shows us Tyler during those hours after he died. He very well… may have completely phantomized, but when he woke up in the real world, the transformation reverted. I'm very scared abt what Aiden’s gonna be like next night.

SUB THEORY: The Power of Human Connection and Phantom Reversal

Remember how Jasmine (the gang tour girl) asked if it was alright that all the kids got sucked in w/ ashlyn? This implies that 

1. They usually expect 1 person/their target to get sucked into the PD

2. The origami gang has never dealt with a group being sucked in at once

- I believe (and the evil gang doesnt know this) that the kids being together is an integral part of their future survival. Tyler snapped back to consciousness in the hospital after Taylor had her PISSED moment. This moment was similar to Logan’s freakout, in that it tugged the phantom world to the real world, for a second. I think these intense emotions (taylor’s specifically out of anger and worry for her twin), pulled tyler’s “soul” out of the PD and into the RD. 

- Now, you may ask, “what abt if a random person got into the PD and died and went into a seizure/coma? Why couldnt their loved ones “bring” them back?” thats a good Q idk. Perhaps the kids all being in the PD together is what creates this flow, a two-way street, between the two dimensions. 

- Anyway also while Ashlyn and co didnt didnt get into an angry freakout moment when Aiden died, but we all know Ash and Aiden got something developing/going on thats special ♥, and thats what tugged Aiden back (its cliche but its the power of love there i said it). 

- Also NOT saying that the other kids’ concern over their friends doesn’t matter or count (Ben and Aiden are Fam too), but like, i’m wondering if it needs to be a REALLY INTENSE love (familial/romantic/whatever) in order to basically bring someone back from the dead. idk

-interestingly, ty WAS essentially in a coma-like state, like how the spy said, which supports that it’s expected that ppl die in the PD eventually, and go into comas. I’m wondering if those who normally get sucked into the PD and die, theyre dealing with it by themselves, have no one to “pull them back” like taylor and/or ashlyn did, and they stay in a coma. 

-rlly hope the boys arent like “possessed” or smn. Maybe the soul is like, tainted? Those big black eyes man… (ALSO THAT PREVIEW IMAGE WITH LOGAN AND THE BIG BLACK EYES??? WHAT??)

-going off the dead PD ppl turn into phantoms theory>> If a phantom is killed, their connected person in the RD who was in a coma dies fr permanently

NUMBER THREE: Ashlyn and the Phantoms (cool new band name) 

we know the kids are getting influenced by the PD, making phantom noises (further supports phantoms were people theory) but with Ashlyn's "really strong" connection to the PD, she's in special danger. If one can turn into a phantom without dying, it's gonna be her. Ryan the spy said that "the girl" – assumingly ashlyn– should be "especially" at risk of danger. This could be bc she was the one who interacted with the rift, or bc she already has a higher level of phantom influence on her. 

-when ashlyn told the phantom to let go, and her friends to calm down, both times she spoke with a black speech bubble WITH PHANTOM NOISE LINES NEAR IT. this is different than characters who have also spoken with black bubbles (aiden, logan, taylor). obviously these have been with threats/malice, but they didn't have the red lines. These times ashlyn has spoken, the phantom acknowledged her voice, and her friends' spell-like violence trance was broken. Theory: ashlyn not only can hear phantoms, but she can speak their language sort of

-when ashlyn was born, a phantom like touched her in a blessing/cursing sense which is part of the reason why she can hear phantoms and her strong PD connection. possibly even possession???? 

-tldr i want ashlyn to enter her monster girl era 

The evil gang seems confused why the kids have lasted so long. maybe Ashlyn's PD connection goes both ways. she provides a strong anchor to the RD. Maybe the PD is USUALLY all desolate with the pillars that we saw in the finale (maybe it's even an afterlife of sorts?), but Ashlyn makes a huge radius (~30 miles! (assuming kids were driving at least 60mph for 30 minutes)) of the PD around where she wakes up mirror the real world, creating a safer space for her and the kids. meanwhile a normal person that gets sucked into the PD gets thrown into a desolate hell world different from the RD (also maybe stuck there permanently), causing them to die much quicker. 

-maybe this influence is even part of the reason why RD tyler is awake (And aiden)

-Ashlyn's influence extends to jamming the recording devices like some kind of weird phantom static.

-Broke: Ashlyn's parents wanted her to learn self defense and have a knife bc they're in the military. Woke: they want her to be able to protect herself after the phantom scare when she was a baby

-Also THANK GOD she’s finally acting on her intuition. Sm times she’s been like “this feels bad!” and doesnt do anything. Almost makes me wonder if it’s a supernatural intuition based on phantom stuff. Like shes WAY OFF from the hospital and the drama and is like “HMM! Smn going on” 

NUMBER FOUR: Origami gang and Co INC. 

-The gangs symbol is an origami crane (orizuru). the crane in East Asia has longevity as one of its symbolisms, with some myths saying it flies souls up to paradise. there's the popular myth that if you fold 1000 cranes you get a wish.

Heres where the evil twist comes in. The gang boss believes that if he traps 1000 people in the PD as like, a sacrifice, then he'll get a wish and he'll ask for eternal life or whatever. this gang is a cult and he's tricked everyone saying that they'll also get a long life but really it's probably only gonna be him 🤫 So they go around to different haunted places in America and pick ppl they sense can open these shadow rifts and get sucked in. the phantoms may be ppl they trapped in the past and they've turned into phantoms

-Ryan, the guy who's spying on the kids, maybe is ALSO "Mr. thomas". he just puts on a wig and is a good actor lol. this is the reason why he asks about "Mr. Thomas's" fate. What goes against this is that Ryan seems to know all about the PD mechanisms, which doesn't fit Mr. Thomas being confused abt ashlyns hair. Unless he wasn't expecting it

– or "Mr thomas" could just be Ryan's friend or brother or smn. A low ranked guy in the gang that got stuck with roping Ashlyn into Savannah, but doesn't know the truth/details about the PD. 

-the gang mentions that "both sides" are trying to track them. either the government and a supernatural hunting group, or even some force in the PD like some Alpha Phantom like the devil who's like "Where's my dead people quota hello?" or better yet "you're messing with MY domain and I'm gonna Get You". 

-This is based solely on the Boss' appearance and smiling countenance: the gang Boss is Aiden's uncle, his dad's brother, his weird, estranged brother who's also evil probably. I'm really hung on this idea don't mind me 

-you have to be able to make a paper origami crane from memory to be an official gang member /hj 

NUMBER FIVE: Gen story/Character arcs and futures

-ready for a “power of love and friendship” aesop. these kids are gonna be so Bonded now after these traumatic experiences

-i had come up with an elaborate “death order” but thats now completely jossed now so im ignoring that

-PRAISING THE FREAKING LORD THAT ALL THE PARENTS KNOW NOWAND THAT MIKE BELIEVES THEM AND IS HELPING HIS DAUGHTER. DAD OF THE YEAR AWARD. IF ANYTHING AHPPENS TO HIM IM SUEING!!!!!

- SO NOW that all the parents know, and like, have seen all the phantoms and everything and BTW WILL PROBABLY GET SUCKED INTO THE PD AT SOME POINT because they felt the shift like the kids did, they help the kids get to Savannah yippee!! a cool Big family squad force they all hop on a working school bus or smn and drive there. PLs

- the families getting sucked in would be HUGE cause they arent prepared. Logan’s grandparents and Lily are top targets 😭

So the kids are gonna get kidnapped. that's definitely gonna be a thing, either mid S2 or ending. up in the air whether the kidnapping is successful or not. (assuming the gang would be smart enough to get rid of the kids’ phones when they get them)

-actually I'm placing my bets now S2 finale will be them getting kidnapped and it just cuts off there for another awful cliffhanger.

-since it seems Mr thomas will be involved, he'll ask the kids to stay after school to talk abt their failing grades or smn, and then maybe they're hit with knockout gas??

OR the gang has been spying on them so they pick a time the kids all separated and jump them. 

-maybe this is when aiden knowing where ashlyns dance studio is is actually plot relevant!!?? like he (and Ben probably cuz they're always together) are able to escape their attackers and Aiden goes to help ashlyn cuz he wants to make sure she's OK. and she's either fine cuz she's a girl boss and can kick butt, or he saves her oo la la 

–lol imagine kidnapping is successful, gang tells kids why they were kidnapped, (if Evil Boss Uncle theory is true this helps facilitate this) but Ashlyn "goes off" on Aiden yelling and "attacking" him and stuff saying he's part of the gang, he planned it all along etc, but it's all a ruse to have the gang think she'll cause another energy spike (and Aiden gets this and plays along) so assuming the kids are locked up, the gang opens their cell to stop ashlyn, and that's when they escape lol

so like, i THOUGHT ashlyn/aiden was gonna be a slow burn but HAHAHA. i mean not as freaking slow obviously as like Miraculous love square lol, but like slow for thriller standards? But things are gonna be heating up between these two 😏 watch ashlyn be ~conflicted~ and ~in denial~~. And meanwhile poor aiden is a confused boy who doesnt know what ash wants like “b u told me to give u space and now here u are grasping my hand like ur life depends on it” 

Sorry back to character arcs:

Ashlyn: Learn to trust and connect with people, make friends, lean on others. Could be nice if she accepts and admits the kids are her friends by the end of S2, leaving the next season for Aiden/Ashlyn dev specifically? More development about her connection with the PD, which could put friendship to the test. [already getting this with her dad and Aiden so this is great]

Also she has the freaking GUILT like i expected! Watch her think tay hates her for like a week before tay is like “no?? I hate the ppl who did this to us instead” and then they hug it out 👍

Taylor: Willing to bet money the twins are unhealthily codependent on each other. She is on the edge bro. Unhinged feral. Is probably gonna be more angry in general despite it being a bad idea, like the top has been blown off. Bottled up emotions~! 

Still thinking she’ll get close to Ben too (whether anything romantic develops on top of it is debatable, but I can see it. theyve already got a cute little closeness going on)..

Tyler: Get this boy some ~THERAPY~ help he’s so depressed and angry. Learn to have hope again (like ben 😭). He has so much negativity inside him, i dont think that’ll help with whatever is going on with him rn like, hes probably in the THICK of the PD influence. He’s kinda like ash, needs to learn to rely on others.

Logan: Seems to be overcoming his fragility well if the arcade scene is any indication. Still has self-worth issues to overcome due to his parents' abandonment. Maybe we'll learn more about that in S2. That could be a rumor and the real reason he lives with his grandparents is that his parents died but idk why that'd be hidden unless their death was suspicious (like, drug ring?? His gpa got the GOODS APPARENTLY). 

Ben: Still needs to find a new passion for life, i suspect playing musical instruments like the guitar will be the answer (thank you tyler). Tho maybe learning to love his altered voice could happen? (tons of dudes have a rough/husky singing voice that ppl love) But this is probably unlikely.  

Aiden: Good Lord like, Aiden being (most likely) suic.idal in the past (and possibly even still NOW?) has floored me. I figured his loneliness and suspected parental neglect was bad but IT’S BAD. Dude wants to feel alive and not depressed… frick. AIDEN ARE YOU going to therapy??? Do your parents KNOW??? Is that why your parents finally settled down?? Guh. this on top of probably untreated ADHD.

–I’m assuming now Aiden started dying his hair to try to get any fragment of serotonin. 

– Kinda wondering if he grew up in a "toxic positivity" mentality home, where his parents are like "we're so privileged we shouldn't complain" ?

– im actually THIS close to beating Aiden’s parents with a stick.

NUMBER SIX: Miscellaneous predictions, wants, musings & hypotheticals.

-guessing now that the twin’s dad had cancer or smn

-hey uh what about the photo Logan took of the phantom back at the sorrel-weed house?? surely he still has it? can he show the parents?? will they be able to see it?

-Logan saw the whole Aidlyn hug from the roof from his snipper position, change my mind.

-Another “death” will happen in S2, possibly even two deaths. (GOD I WAS RIGHT)

-Mr thomas switches sides and helps the kids, gives them info

-Ryan (the spy) switches sides and helps the kids

-the tour lady Jasmine and the Boss are a hot evil couple 

also kinda want them to have a Rourke & Helga dynamic where he throws her under the bus at the last moment and she's Bissed 

-I want the boss to die by his own evil plan. 

–i doubt a redemption arc will happen but I'd be down for it if done well.

-*grabs your shoulders until they bleed* listen. Aiden saved ashlyn, now I need her to save him. I need this. 

-Taylor and Ashlyn girl time please!!!

-Logan and Aiden becoming closer would also give me joy. big Freckle and Rocky energy. 

-this doesn't have to happen but I think it'd be really funny if Aiden somehow gets the IDEA that Logan has a crush on Ashlyn when Logan doesn't, causing a stupid silly short jealousy arc.

-actually I really need a "can skydive from 10,000 ft but can't confess to the girl he likes" Aiden Clark 

-I've got a bad feeling smn will happen to Ashlyn's parents, specifically her dad

-if any of the gang/cult members hurt the kids or their fam fr irl im gonna >8) lose it

-the Origami gang fails to kidnap the kids and they accidentally create a huge "energy spike", making phantoms appear everywhere in town.

-if the kids DO get kidnapped successfully, I want Ashlyn to be an awesome girlboss and use her knife shoes to help them escape.

-if my puppy fic became Canon that'd be swaggie actually.

-let Ashlyn have a dog 2023

-pov you're in Georgia in the fall and a hurricane hits, knocking out solar power for a few days. what then? :)

-when all this garbage is over and they hopefully all live in the end, I want them to have a fun stargazing party led by Logan cause they can finally enjoy the night (And maybe aidlyn have their first Kiss?? 🙈)

-If there ISNT a "group goes to see Ashlyn in a ballet performance" scene then I'm WRITING IT MYSELF 

-At the end of all things, Aiden and Ashlyn will become a couple, or at least have reciprocal romantic feelings. This is not just my shipper heart talking. I feel it in my brain, in my soul. 

-So we know one or both of Aiden’s parents are writers. If anyone knows if that trophy Aiden’s dad is holding in that photo is a real award, hmu

-a kid going into an angry protective phantom mode to protect another(s) 😳 (aidlyn on the brain but it could be anyone)

-if I had a nickel for every time I've imagined Aiden dying in Ashlyn's arms, I'd have many nickels (IT BASICALLY HAPPENED! GREAT! 👍😭)

-what if having a good singing voice ran in Ben's family? haha jkjk…unless??? but they don't sing like ever cuz they don't want Ben to feel bad 

-man what if an sbg kid “died” by a phantom pushing them down a set of stairs.. 

-Rlly hope that Aiden's parents don't get scared seeing phantoms in their house and hearing other families having phantoms in THEIR houses and thinking the whole town is haunted, and they consider moving which they don't wanna do bc Aiden finally has friends but what else can they do!? angst. 

-John 15:13 for Ashlyn with the others except it's not permanent (I'm not saying ash is a Jesus figure tho WHWKEJEJDJ)

-I rlly wanna see ashlyn laugh

-Taylor actually using her mechanic skills. like maybe the jeep gets damaged [HAPPENED] and she fixes it. I dont want that jeep gone bro its already iconic (update: it’s probably gone bro.. sad)

-might be nice for Logan to have a reflection moment where even though all this horrible stuff is happening some good came out of it like he's not a slave to bullies anymore 

-I want to see Ben happy. well actually I want them all happy pls

[hatedmaggot]

no hate..but you have money for alcohol but dont for cat food and ask people online to feed your cat embarrassing..yr 18 or whatever and beg yr mom and brother or idk who to give you money arent you emberessed that yr a literal adult and still not capable of taking care of urself yea i dont know anything about you and why are you homelles but still...

aren't you embarrassed you can't spell.

but to be serious, i don't know how you expect me to be fully responsible of and able to take care of myself when im homeless - just because im 18 ?? my life has been severely less than ideal, i wasn't raised to know this sort of stuff & whatever mental illnesses i have really make it hard for me to stay grounded in reality & function as a human being.

when i made that post asking for money i didn't have a job and wasn't asking any of my family for money because we're all broke. elliot was living on whatever we were eating (which was fuck all & unhealthy as shit) and the bulk bag of dog biscuits we'd been given.

i actually do have a job now, but it's casual and im only working 3 hours a day. when im paying for cat litter, cat food, MY food, the laundromat & alcohol (shocking. i have an addiction) there's not a lot left to actually live on and get me out of homelessness. i still live in a tent. i still live in a shitty middle of nowhere outback town in a state im completely new to. and im still living with my psycho bitch mother.

my 'e-beg' post is staying up because i still need help. im not demanding anything, im literally just begging for strangers' scraps. which actually is incredibly humiliating, don't think im not fucking ashamed of that. if i wasn't desperate, i wouldn't have made that post.

[android-anathema]

Apparently I'm in the 99.9th percentile for borderline traits and the 64th for people woth BPD. I was at once mortified and relieved to see this. It seems to fly in the face of my own experience that ive gotten much better but in another way it tracks completely. Ive been feeling terrible when nothing should be wrong and not really like being depressed. From an overwhelming sense of having no place in the world and deeply distrusting and feeling alienated from everyone around me that persists whether theres anything to provoke it. Its not a thing that feels like being unwell, it just feels true. As is typically the case with complex trauma (which is functionally the same thing as BPD in the ICD-11. im diagnosed with BPD for insurance reasons)

I score low on measures of depression and PTSD alone seems inadequate to describe how i feel and is an area that's been getting better anyway, but in many ways i feel more alienated and angry than ever. A stronger sense of helplessness and preoccupation with revenge. Which just makes sense as complex trauma symptomstend to be particularly stubborn as far as the officially recognised trauma based disorders go.

So thats comforting in a way. I dont just feel bad for no reason and the reason is something which typically resolves in your late 20's to 30's without treatment if you stay alive and arent unable to escape some major problem like homelessness or an abusive situation which would interrupt the natural mechanism for recovering from trauma. Seeing it in numbers like this... 99.9th percentile... 0.1% of the population and 36% of those with a rare and severe mental illness could understand me is what i see. So that's just it then. Ive experienced something almost no one can understand and it makes me strange. Separates me from other people and makes it impossible to ever not be alone. Or thats what it feels like. If someone said they couldnt understand what it must be like for me because theyve never been through anything similar i would balk at that. I would think to myself that this world is so willfully ignorant, complacent and accepting of violence people imagine they're just incapable of understanding anyone whose been victimised in a serious way to shirk the highly difficult and arduous process of spending 30 minutes reading about it or having a conversation with someone about what its like for them. A sentiment that might not even correlate to whatever it was they were trying to communicate. They might not mean anything at all but just having heard someone else say it feel like its something youre supposed to say in such a situation. But it doesnt matter! Consistency is irrelevant and explanations are pointless. All that exists is the unbridgeable gap between me and everyone else. There is no need to prove it, it is an axiom by which all other potential truths are measured not something to be proved itself

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

psa: if a relationship (platonic, romantic, etc.) is causing you severe emotional pain and you are being convinced its somehow not the persons fault and shit still isnt getting better despite that, i am pleading with you to RUNN.

and this is for you! yes you whos reading this and is thinking " this isnt for me. i mean it hurts, but they arent doing anything.. im just mentally ill/emotional/traumatized/overreacting" bc i was there!! and i was WRONG!! they were doing things! theyre actually one of the most emotionally abusive ppl i know. but they were small things, that built up overtime.

even if ur right and they arent doing shit, you do NOT need to stay for a painful relationship either way!!!! PLEASE!!!!

and please, if youre staying bc you are so lonely you dont have other connections, fucking dm me. ill be your friend. i mean it. just do it i dont bite. dont make yourself stay for pain.

[compassionatereminders]

my most secret confession.. i kind of wish my mental abilties would get worse? i have autism and my cognitive abilities and functioning is definitely Not very good but it feels like its not enough to me.. idk if this is just internalized "im not disabled enough" ableism or if things actually ARE even more difficult than it seems and i just dont realize bc of masking or what tho, or if i would Genuinely feel happier with less cognitive ability even if things were more difficult.

that being said i dont want to put too much of a burden on my family, my ability to reliably do tasks is already limited id feel really bad limiting it further if i could help it. idk! its weird. i also wish my psychosis (very mild all things considered) would show up more frequently but its tied directly to my depression which is being treated so weh. it feels weird even saying this bc from what i can tell, you're supposed to either want to get better or you're happy just where you are. i dont ever rlly hear people talk about wanting to get worse/more disabled in ways that arent Obviously just internalized ableism (ie wanting to get worse so 'youll be treated more seriously' most of the time you will just be treated as less than human rather than a human worth listening to...)

i feel this about my chronic pain too. i don't know why im like this. its hard for me to even consider these feelings as Wrong even though i know some people would call me crazy for wanting to be more disabled. i just know theyre weird and people would get mad at me for them, so thats why theyre my most secret secrets

Desiring to be more mentally ill/visibly disabled than you are is a quite common experience. For many people it IS an internalized ableism thing, because there's the assumption that if only they were THAT disabled, then people would believe them and treat them with respect and compassion, and that is - as any severely disabled person could tell you - complete bullshit. But the desire is common and as long as you don't get sucked into the illusion that there's actually a way to win against ableism by being The Right Kind Of Visibly Disabled Person (there isn't), I wouldn't worry too much about it.