#they have their moments where they can highly agitate the other but it's not uncommon to see chara nappin on the robot as he reads mags

[mountain-man-cumeth]

What Went Wrong: An In-Depth Analysis of Muriel's Route

*Youtuber voice*

Below are the opinions of an uneducated individual on what could’ve left the majority of The Arcana audience dissatisfied. I will explore the plot, tropes, themes and morals of the Muriel route and try to explain what may have gone wrong. I will be treating the game as a novel since it's advertised as one.

1. Consistency. If you are unfamiliar with the chekhov's gun; it's a story writing principle that dictates each element you introduce should come into play (foreshadowing). Now let's start with a few story beats that were later abandoned or concluded in an underwhelming manner:

Muriel's blanket

Muriel's magic mark (on his back)

Forest spirit (spirits in general)

Lucio's upbringing

Circumstances of MC's death

Figurines/whittling/charms

Muriel's blanket is teased to be a tapestry, which would tie in with his later fascination with them later on, as it had been the only thing he had left from his past. MC neither sees nor comments on the blanket, we only know it exists thanks to other playthroughs and short stories.

Magic marks are an important point in the game. Every main route emphasises on how it affects the chosen LI. It's reveal is important in a way that it serves as a passage to a new act where the reader explores magic and Arcana pantheon as they are a monumental part of the overall worldbuilding. This exact point applies to the Heart of the Forest and how spirits interact with the world around them as well.

Whittling and Charm making are the only hobbies we get from Muriel's isolated life, their introduction helps the reader humanise the character by giving us a crumb of his everyday life. It's never mentioned again after the scene where MC asks him what he does. He doesn't idly whittle during their journey and charms only come to play in an offhanded reference during reversed ending.

The other two are also ignored but I will touch on Lucio later on.

Why do these matter? A few abandoned plot points don't make or break the story but on a grander level it hinders the audience investment. When we read, we like to think the details we notice will come to play eventually, we like recognizing references that were introduced earlier. I'm sure I don't need to give examples on this one, I don't think anyone will disagree.

2. Themes. Thematic influences this story utilized are all over the place, and it seems to me like it stems from the improper application of certain tropes;

The Hero's Journey

Home Sweet Home

Shell-Shocked Vet

Last of His Kind

etc.

Some of these tropes tackle themes such as;

Slavery

PTSD

Survivor's Guilt

Genocide

I'm not going to try to explain How to Write any of these topics. I'm not remotely qualified. I think it's better if I just give examples from popular media because whether you know how to write it or not, you can still understand when it's written well;

AtLA deals with genocide and survivor's guilt. It's in the name; The Last Airbender. Aang is the sole survivor of a culture he'd only had an opportunity to engage in for a handful of years. He left them with a childish tantrum and now they're gone forever. I can't think of another mainstream series that shows the gruesome reality of war and genocide better than this one.

When Muriel realizes his true heritage and loses Khamgalai is the point of the story where Luke sees his family's farm burned down, Aang goes back to the air temple, Treebeard walks in on the demolished part of the forest. (The inciting incident)

(Could also have been forest spirit’s death but it was too early in the story so I don’t consider it a missed opportunity.)

Up until this point the hero has their doubts, they're going through the motions but they are either underestimating the enemy or they're a passive protagonist. Either way, this is the point where the hero has to take the reins of the story. What purpose does this serve in Muriel's route instead? It simply validates Muriel's beliefs. He's useless, he isn't strong enough. We as the reader need a point to see where the hero takes a step to drive the story forward or whoever takes that step will steal the spotlight, it will be their story. As it is, this is the point where it ceases to be Muriel’s story.

PTSD got the worst end of the deal. Since Dragon Age fandom has a huge overlap with the Arcana I will use Fenris as an example; for those who are unfamiliar with the character, Fenris is an escaped slave. After the sex scene he vividly describes an experience that most people can easily identify as a flashback. The game never tells us that he was abused, it doesn’t show us him having a panic attack but it shows us that whatever transpired between him and the player character clearly triggered an unpleasant memory.

Arcana tries and initially succeeds to do something similar. We see that the character is untrustworthy, sensitive to touch, easily agitated, can’t sleep outside of his perceived safe environment… It introduces us the cause later on and the story has two options, each will drastically change the moral of the story:

Remember these as they will be important later on

Portray Muriel fighting as a bad thing; You can’t fight violence with violence angle or the fact that the villain’s forcing him into a situation where he’ll have to fight again makes the villain all the more intimidating.

Portray Muriel fighting as a good thing; He has the means to defeat the villain and he just needs encouragement. With great power comes great responsibility. By not fighting he willingly condemns everyone to an awful fate and that he is selfish.

I’d like to take a second to explore the 1. Option, I feel like the game may have intended to implement that idea but failed because of the implementation of Morga and choices presented for the player character: Morga is an Old-Soldier, these characters are often push the hero out of their comfort zone in an aggressive way towards complacency, they are a narrative foil to the mentor. For the first option to work the story had to show Khamgalai acting as a mentor and having the protagonists challenge Morga’s teachings(see Ozai-Iroh). As it is, Morga’s actions are never put under scrutiny (narratively) and her death feels hollow as a result. She didn’t sacrifice herself for the heroes due to her guilt, she died because she felt a moment of sympathy for her son which wasn’t explored before, she showed no intention to change nor any doubt.

It is clear the game choose 2. Option, it is a controversial choice given Muriel’s mental condition and the game is acutely aware of this, which is likely why Muriel’s PTSD will get carefully scraped from the story from here on out. (I won’t address other instances where his trauma wasn’t taken into account, I feel like this explanation should cover them as well.)

3. Morals. Every story, whether the author intends it or not, has a moral. The Villain most often acts against that moral and in turn can change the hero's perspective. Morals are not ideals; the morality of Killmonger isn’t that marginalised people should fight for their rights, it is that vengeance is just. Whether it’s right or wrong can be debated but what makes an ideal the moral of the story is in the portrayal. How the narrator depicts the events, how people around the heroes react... all are a part of portrayal.

The story choosing “Muriel fighting is a good thing” earlier puts in the foundation of a moral. The story tells us Muriel has to fight, it’s the right thing to do. He has to be brave for the people he loves.

This choice affects how his past actions will be perceived; now, him escaping the arena to save himself is cowardly, abandoning Morga is cowardly.

The story tells us it wasn’t, but shows us that it was. This is the end of the midpoint of the story, at this point we need to have a good grasp on what we should perceive as wrong or right for us to feel invested. If we zig-zag between the morals we won’t know which actions we should root for. But more than that, the conclusion will not feel cathartic as it will inevitably demonstrate the opposing ideals clashing at its climax.

Villain doesn't necessarily have to be sympathetic and Muriel's route makes no effort to make him as such, but they need to be understandable. What danger does Lucio pose to the status quo, what makes him a compelling villain? Whether he conquers Vesuvia or not doesn’t drastically affect Muriel’s way of life, he’s been in hiding for years. He doesn’t threaten to steal MC’s body, Muriel is not compelled to pick up arms to save his beloved. He wants to protect the people from going through what he’s been through, right? That is what the story wants us to think. But what has he been through? Fighting was his choice, Lucio tricked him into it. Lucio later tricked Morga, his own mother, to save his own hide. This tells us that Lucio is a manipulator, but he doesn’t manipulate his way into Vesuvia, he barges in with deus ex machina monsters. He doesn’t demonstrate his skills as a tactician by making deals with neighbouring kingdoms to get their armies. We don’t know his strengths therefore we don’t know his weaknesses. If he seems to be losing he can just conjure a giant dragon to burn everything down, we just can’t know. That is why the application of deus ex machina is highly taboo, the victories don’t feel earned and defeats feel unfair.

4. Tone. Playing with the genre is not uncommon and a game such as Arcana has many opportunities to do so. It is a romance story, everything else is the back-drop. The tone works best when its overall consistent but tonal changes act as shock for the audience to keep them engaged and keeping one tone indefinitely gets us desensitized. We can’t feel constant misery if we are not made to feel tinges of hope in between. Good examples of dramatic tonal change (that I can think of): Mulan - arriving at the decimated village, La Vita e Bella - the father’s death, M*A*S*H - death of Hawkeye’s friend. Two of these examples are mostly comedy which is why this tonal shift affects us so, it was all fun and games until we are slapped in the face with the war going on. There are no one liners in those scenes, the story takes a moment to show appropriate respect to the dead, it gives its characters time to digest and come to terms with loss. Bad examples are the majority of Marvel movies.

In Muriel’s route there’s never such a thing, Muriel has a panic attack and MC kisses him. This unintentionally tells us, the genre being romance, that the panic attack only served to further MC’s advances. It tells us that he’s never had the control of his life and it’s yet again stripped from him by the decisions of player character. This is not the only instance this happens. The story shoe-horns in multiple cuddle sessions between important plot beats. And it does the exact opposite during a moment where he is having a heart-to-heart with the person he loves by having the ghost of Morga appear to give an ominous warning/advice.

When he runs off during masquerade it’s built up to be an important plot point. Muriel will finally face his past, he’s been running away from it all along, and he will have an opportunity to be accepted back in. MC is supportive but ultimately, it’s meant to be Muriel's moment. But as I mentioned above this is not his story anymore so he’s not given any time to address his problems, instead a ghost appears to tell him what he needs to do, again. Because we need to wrap the story up, we don’t have time.

Remember how I said the 2 Options will be important later on, well here we are at the very end. Upright and reversed.

“Portray Muriel fighting as a bad thing”

This suggests that the triumph of Muriel won’t be through violence. Maybe he will outsmart Lucio in a different way, he won’t play his games anymore. This option suggests that Lucio will not be beaten by his own terms.

“Portray Muriel fighting as a good thing”

This option concludes with Muriel finally overcoming his reservations on violence and doing what's right to save the people he loves. And bringing justice to people who Lucio hurt.

If you are wondering why the upright ending feels random, this is likely why. The ending plays out as if the story was building on the 1st option while we spent chapters upon chapters playing out the 2nd one. It is unearned.

(The reversed ending, being reversed, also uses Option 1 path but in which Muriel can’t achieve his narrative conclusion)

The Coliseum is filled with people who are on their side against Lucio’s shadow goons. Because we can’t have people being on Lucio’s side without addressing the duality of human nature, even though it’s an important part of Muriel’s story. The people who watched and enjoyed Lucio’s bloodsport are no more, they are all new and enlightened offscreen. We completely skipped the part where Vesuvia comes to terms with its own complacency and Muriel simply feels at ease because the crowd is cheering on him now. This is what happens when you give the character a chance to challenge those who have been complicit in his abuse (masquerade scene) and completely skip it to move the story along.

Muriel doesn't get justice, ever. The people only love him now because he's fighting for them instead of his own survival. Morga or her clan doesn't answer for the massacre of Kokhuri, Vesuvia doesn't answer for the sick entertainment they indulged in and Lucio doesn't answer for Muriel's enslavement. It is not even acknowledged, nowhere in the story (except the very end of reversed ending, and even then it almost gets him killed so its clearly the wrong thing to do on his part) is a choice presented where Muriel has an opportunity to get any sort of compensation where he instead chooses to move on.

I don’t intend to straw man anyone but this is a sentiment I’ve seen a lot; “It’s a short story, a dating-sim, what do you expect?”

I expect nothing, I’m simply explaining why some people feel how they feel. It is a short dating-sim but it seems to me like it was aiming to be something more by borrowing elements that were clearly far above their weight range to tease something more and under deliver. It is okay to feel content with the story, and it’s okay to feel let down. If we had a unanimous decision on literature we would never be inclined to write our own stories.

[heinoushangar-a]

chara having an argument with mtt

mtt: sweetheart i will Fight you

chara: you're all bolts and metal, sweetheart. you couldn't fight me if you wanted to. :)

mtt: [POPS OUT OF ROBO BODY]

chara: ... o shit

[petri808]

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26

Thank you for your patience! The last couple weeks were rough with final projects and exams so I’ll do my best to get back on track :)

Nalu Au. Angst. TW mentions of kidnapping, killing 

“FUCK!!!” Natsu screams and buries his face in his hands. The message was loud and clear and if they didn’t find Lucy quickly, Touka was set to kill.

Levy rushed over to console the man because she knew the situation had just turned into a worst-case scenario. “D-Don’t lose hope yet,” she does her best to keep her voice smooth even though inside she was screaming. “We’ll find her, Gajeel can track… her phone... wait a minute,” She suddenly jumps up and rushes back to her phone. “Track her phone! I can track her phone!”

Natsu looks up, “what are you taking about?!”

“A couple years ago I lost my old phone,” Levy rambled as she tapped furiously on her screen, “so, after I replaced it, we both turned on a tracker app so we could find each other’s phones in case it happened again! I never imagined it would come in so handy!”

“Are you serious!” He jumped off the couch and rushed over to the woman with hopeful intent.

Once it began, they watched the cursor on the screen pulsing as it searched for Lucy’s phone signal. Each second that ticked by was excruciatingly slow. “Come on, come on,” they chant together. The map on the screen starts to move, zeroing in, closer and closer.

“Looks like...” Levy mumbled aloud as it moved, “somewhere in Meguro... near a Meguro nursery school...”

“I know that area...”

“What?”

“That’s my hometown.”

“Okay it’s stopped moving, that must be the building.” Levy quickly screen shots the location and forwards it to Natsu’s phone. “I’ll send it to Gajeel too. If you hurry you might be able to catch a train to the closest station.”

“Thanks, Levy!” Natsu wasted no time in rushing out the door. Precious minutes were already passing by and it’ll take him at least 30 minutes by train. He called Gray to update him on the situation as he ran to the station.

“Yeah, that’s near our old high school man, I don’t get it,” Natsu tells his friend.

“Maybe it’s a coincidence?” Gray responds.

“I don’t know. That chicks been stalking me for a couple years that I know of, but something is just not settling right for me.”

“You think she knew you in high school?”

“Maybe... oh, I’m getting on the train now. I’ll call you as soon as I can.”

“Good luck Natsu and be careful!”

“I will.”

Natsu plopped down onto a seat out of breath from running as fast as he could. It was lucky for him that the train hit the station he was near in a few minutes. Maybe luck was finally on his side. According to Gajeel, the address the police had on file went back to a location in the city of Yokohama which was close by to Meguro. It was Touka’s parents home that she’d given, but according to them, the girl had left as soon as she was 18 and never contacted them again. Obviously, she’d given the address to lead them away from her current location. There were more questions than answers at this point and frustrating to everyone involved.

Was it possible that Touka had attended Meguro Nihon University high school along with he and Gray? Is that why she still lived so close to it? It wasn’t uncommon for students to attend high schools away from home if the curriculum offered was what the student was interested in. That’s why he’d chosen the school, but luckily it was still in his hometown. But no matter how much he tried, Natsu couldn’t remember ever seeing a girl that looked like Touka. She may look different now, but could it really be so drastic that he wouldn’t remember her? Then again, he hadn’t paid much attention to the opposite sex back then so it’s highly possible he’d missed her.

He received a call from Levy letting him know that after further digging, Gajeel was able to narrow down the apartment number and building address, confirming what the tracking site already told them. The phone number they had on file for Touka was also turned off, so they couldn’t reach her, but did confirm the Instagram post along with the previous incident will be used as probable cause to search the woman’s apartment. The wheels of justice were slow, but at least it was finally moving. If only they’d taken the couples concerns more seriously, Touka may not have had an opportunity to kidnap Lucy. Gajeel is pushing his supervisors to move quickly under the circumstances, but in order to make sure the charges stick, everything needed to be done by the book. The warrant was being signed as they spoke and Natsu was warned to be careful. If he located the right place, to not go in unless he felt Lucy’s life was in imminent peril, because no one knew what Touka was capable of.

No average citizen could plan for situations like, and Natsu certainly had no experience to help him figure out what to do or not to do. Should he wait for the police to arrive? Should he just barge in? What if he does and it only makes things worse? If Touka was in love with him, would she attack him too? It was certainly a possibility. Nobody can fully understand what a person is willing to do when their mind is crazed, and such uncertainties are the most dangerous of situations.

It felt so uncomfortable being back on his home turf under these circumstances. Definitely not the homecoming he’d wish upon anyone. There were six blocks from the station to the apartment building, so in order to get there quicker Natsu hailed a taxi. As he stared out the window, eyes narrowed, calculating, seeing all the familiar landmarks, again his anger built up. How dare Touka stain his memories of Meguro like this! A convenience store they’d shop at, the nursery school his little sister attended, or the high school he loved so much... He’ll never be able to come home again without remembering this is also where Lucy had been kidnapped and brought to.

The streets were empty, silent and still if not for the occasional car passing through. Amber streetlights illuminated the way. Natsu has the taxi drop him off around the corner from the apartment building, just in case Touka was watching for them. The woman had to assume that her actions would bring consequences. As he gets closer, Natsu assesses the three-story building. It was nondescript and open with no visible security gates or guards, just a single stairwell leading to the upper floors. According to Gajeel, Touka’s apartment was number 206 on the second floor. So, he slips cautiously along the building’s exterior to hide his presence as best as he could and ascends the staircase, soft steps to negate any sounds from his shoes. Number 206 was the last apartment on the second floor which meant he had to pass by five others. These poor people had no idea what was going on right beside them.

Natsu gently leans up to Touka’s front door, pressing his ear against the solid wood to listen for any evidence that Lucy was indeed inside. He could hear light sobbing between a low and somewhat muffled conversation. Ugh! He couldn’t tell who the voices were coming from! No— wait... okay it is Lucy inside! Natsu quickly typed out a text to Levy confirming the woman was alive and the address was on point, to which Levy responded with Gajeel was on the way with a warrant.

But the longer Natsu listened, the louder the voices inside were becoming, angrier and growing desperate...

“No! Please don’t kill me!!!”

His eyes widen instantaneously like a shot of instant adrenaline. That was Lucy! And the panic her voice screamed immediate. Without a moment of hesitation or thought, Natsu grabbed the door handle. Fuck! It was locked! He takes a step back and front-kicked the door as hard as he could, once, twice in quick succession around the locks. After the second hit, the door starts to give way, so he hauled back and gave it a third, then a shoulder. He didn’t care if he broke a bone or dislocated his shoulder because all he could think about was getting in there right now! With a final roar, Natsu slammed his body into the door. Wood goes flying as the frame gives way and the door swings open, the momentum causing him to stumble forward onto his knees.

“Nat—.”

Lucy’s scream is cut short and as Natsu looked up, he sees Touka standing behind Lucy with one arm around her body and a knife being held to her throat. Lucy’s hands and ankles were bound in front of her, shaking and fists clenching in a panicked agitation. All the blood drained from his face. One wrong move and Lucy was dead.

“T-Touka...” Natsu scrambled to his feet and put his hands up. “Just stay calm. D-Don’t do anything you’ll regret.”

[throughthewwods]

100 Days of Productivity. Day 87

💜 enrolled my kiddo in some math tutoring over the summer

💙 had my first appointment with my new counselor

Seems like a good fit. He has experience with trauma and digging deeper, which is uncommon at these sort of community mental health organizations. he was also really good at managing our time constructively rather than letting our 45 minutes be whatever. He had me look into the Enneagram. I don’t particularly value personality profiles, but if it helps speed up his understanding of me then it’s fine. I explained to him I have an avoidant default mechanism to deal with my anxiety because the anxiety leads to debilitating depression, so he had me look into ‘type 9’. Avoidant, flowy people. Humorously, these are the exact kind of people I don’t get on well with because their excessive avoidance is a bull in a China shop.. So I took a quiz. I suppose I’m like a ‘type 5’, except the stereotype someone who craves knowledge is anti-social and lacks social intelligence. Type 6 seems true of my survivalism. ‘Type 4’ is a stretch though. I do want to live authentically, but I my ‘uniqueness’ has been more of an inconvenience than anything I aspired for. as for ‘type 2’, I do highly value living a life of compassion and helpfulness, but I couldn’t give a flying fuck if people‘like me’. This is why i think over generalizings like Myers-Briggs templates are bs..

98% MATCH Type 5 is described as The Investigator. Fives seek understanding and knowledge, and are more comfortable with data than people.

96% MATCH Type 6 is also known as The Skeptic. Sixes are preoccupied with security, seek safety, and like to be prepared for problems.

91% MATCH Type 4 is known as The Individualist. Fours want to be unique and to live life authentically, and are highly attuned to their emotional experience.

90% MATCH Type 2 can be described as The Giver. Twos want to be liked and find ways that they can be helpful to others so that they can be loved and belong.

86% MATCH Type 7 is described as The Enthusiast. Sevens want to have as much fun and adventure as possible and are easily bored.

78% MATCH Type 1 can be thought of as The Perfectionist. Ones place a lot of emphasis on following the rules and doing things correctly.

76% MATCH Type 8 is also known as The Challenger. Eights see themselves as strong and powerful and seek to stand up for what they believe in.

61% MATCH Type 3 is also known as The Achiever. Threes want to be successful and admired by other people, and are very conscious of their public image.

45% MATCH Type 9 is also called The Peacemaker. Nines like to keep a low profile and let the people around them set the agenda.

📚 Read a little on dialectic behavioral therapy

⭐️ scheduled an appointment to do some paperwork

💙 cooked a good dinner even though I didn’t feel up to it

💕 enjoyed more of Narnia with RB and kiddo

♥️ Had quality time with RB and a more passionate evening

Which is only worth mentioning because when two people are exhausted and stressed out it’s very easy to fall into a routine of laying down in a comfortable bed together and checking out mentally to a TV show that requires no mental energy ( bonus points if the plot is completely on relatable and somehow makes you feel better about your own life ) however, such a routine is not an aphrodisiac.

——-

Unfortunately, by the time I got done talking with my counselor about everything that is stressful and agitates my anxiety, I felt pretty drained, flat, well, anxious.. did not accomplish anything else really. I think today I just need to push grad school out of my mind entirely, so I can be at least a little productive on pressing things that need to be taken care of right now, not six months from now.

One of the nonprofits got back to me about possibly helping out with their support groups, so that’s good. Another domestic violence nonprofit got back to me, but they don’t expect to offer another training until fall.

I guess the only thing I want to reflect on at the moment is how grateful I am that RB is very good at creating a space where I can safely breathe, Makes it so I can just be... whether that’s venting a bit, chatting about nonsense and cracking dark jokes to get my mind off things, or laying in silence with my head rested on his chest listening to his heartbeat, not very much left in me.

Kiddo has also been much better about getting her schoolwork done lately, which is a beautiful reprieve.

[takanos-love-butt]

World’s Greatest ‘Mary-Sue’

Chapter 3:  Case of Mama Bear and Papa Bear

((Read first:  Prologue|Chapter 1|Chapter 2))

((Note before you read:  When I write on Trifecta I'll base it off the light novels dealing with the Trifecta pairing and not just what you find in the anime/manga.  So if you haven't read them yet, September scanlations translated it to English and put it on Novel Updates.  They have up to Volume 6 so be sure to read them!  I've actually run across MANY in the fandom who don't know about these and/or don't realize these novels are canon...))

“You're just being shy, you know that right?”

“I just don't want to do it...here,”

“Aw c'mon, just for a little while?”

“No.”

Yokozawa didn't know how many times he's had to tell Kirishima he just didn't want to be so intimate in the presence of Hiyori.  What the editor in chief was asking for though, wasn't anything you'd find in the books one would keep under their bed.  “I'm sure Hiyori wouldn't mind us cuddling a bit. Besides, she's sleeping,”

“Right, why don't you do the fatherly thing and carry her to bed?” the grumpy bear's eye twitched as he struggled to finish his last beer for the night.  He was getting kinda sleepy which was the purpose of his drinking in the first place; a way to wind down for the night.  They had a lovely family night with dinner and a children's movie that Hiyo borrowed from Yuki-chan.  All the excitement wore Hiyo down before drowsiness could ever touch the two that were quietly bickering at the moment.  

“Yeah I suppose you're right,” Kirishima just sighed and got up to do as told. “You're mine after I get back though,” he started for Hiyori's room with her in his arms; Sorata close at his heels.  Yokozawa just rolled his eyes in response.  But he really just couldn't get by how Kirishima would look doing fatherly tasks.  He just looked so sweet.  

When Kirishima returned, he found Yokozawa texting someone on his phone.  “Heeey, I said no answering to work!”

“This isn't work, it's family,” he causally replied.

“Ah...everything is okay, right?”

“Hm?  Oh yes,” Yokozawa said figuring why he might've asked.  “It's not an emergency or anything, just seeing if I could spare some time,”

“Hmm,” Kirishima pondered. “Say...you've met my family, when can I meet yours?” he asked. Since their relationship started, Yokozawa has had the pleasure of meeting not just Kirishima's daughter, but his mother and father as well.  It would only be right that Kirishima himself could meet another member of the Yokozawas.  

“You wanna meet my family, huh?” Yokozawa replied a little embarrassed.  He was touched of course and he had a great relationship with his parents and sister, but it was still a little embarrassing to expose another deep part of what made Yokozawa Takafumi.

“Of course!  It's only natural I meet the family of the person I love!” Kirishima said claiming a place much closer to Yokozawa. “Besides, I wanna see all who influenced the our famous wild bear!”  he nuzzled his 'mama' bear's neck.  

Yokozawa immediately blushed and tried to back away, “Oi...I said not out here...” He was always uptight about him doing these things in the living areas where Hiyori usually played and spent her time.  Not only that, but she can also easily get up out of bed for the bathroom or glass of water.  

“Mmmm should I carry you to my bedroom then?” Kirishima purred never ceasing  in his advances.  “I really just wanted to cuddle you, but your shyness turns me on so much...” his nuzzling turning to small suckling kisses.

“Who's being shy!  I told you how I feel about...” he was cut off by Kirishima capturing his lips in a deep kiss.  As always, his kisses were highly intoxicating.  They manage to make Yokozawa so weak every time.  “S..stop this...”

/(^x^)\

Yokozawa managed to make it to his sister's condo. His lower back hurt so bad he wasn't sure if he could stand for very long.  “Damn him...”

Meiri answered the door to him with a small gym bag on her shoulder.  She'd be staying with her brother while her husband was on tour with his musical troupe.  Pervs seemed to love when Takuya wasn't home and their celebrity status made it all the more difficult.  So she'd 'hide out' with her brother while he was gone.  “Hi Taka-chan!” she cheerfully greeted.  “Say did you do overtime last night?  You look awfully worn out,” she questioned when she saw how tired he looked.

Her brother sighed, “Yeah you could say that,”

When they got back to his home, she noticed he was having a hard time sitting and she was growing a little concerned.  “You know, hernias aren't that uncommon in younger men.  Perhaps you should go check if you have one and nip it in the bud before it gets worse,” Meiri suggested totally oblivious as to the real reason he had a hard time sitting.  

“Yeah...I should,” the look on his face couldn't be more awkward.  If it really were a medical problem it wouldn't be as embarrassing to talk about.  But since he knew that wasn't the case....

After they arrived, Meiri set to making herself at home like she always did.  She'd even make the meals and clean up a little.  Not that his apartment needed it much.  “Hey, where's Sorata?” She asked noticing the elder feline wasn't around at all.  Usually he'd cuddle with Meiri as she settled into his couch with a fuzzy blanket and a good book.  

“Ahh...he's with Takano,” Yokozawa lied.  He couldn't understand why he just couldn't tell his own sister about his relationship with Kirishima (which would ultimately explain where Sorata was).  He knew she would never be prejudiced at all.  So...why couldn't he just tell her about his new flame? “I..I've been doing some pretty heavy all nighters for the time being with Za Kan's new anime movie coming out...so...”

“Ahh I see.  Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” he said settling in with a couple of beers for him and Meiri.  He did get a little nervous at what she was about to ask.

“Did something happen with Takano-san?  You guys aren't as close as I'd thought you'd be....or could it be because of...” she wasn't sure if she should even say Onodera's name.  She had sneaking suspicion about those two since she'd first started with their department and they seemed to be far closer than boss and subordinate.  But she also knew of Yokozawa's one-sided affection for Takano.  

Yokozawa just sighed and went into how he received a definite rejection from Takano and his decision was Onodera. “He's not at fault, I only brought this on myself.  So don't go having horrid feelings toward Takano just because I got hurt in that,”

Before she started working with Emerald, Meiri only knew of Takano from what Yokozawa would tell her at family gatherings and such, but never got the chance to formally meet him as her brother's friend.  When he'd met Takano, she had just gotten married and of course set off to care for her new husband. Much of her mangas were written backstage while Takuya was rehearsing/performing or touring with certain musical companies.  It was really the only way her and her husband could spend time with each other while following both of their dreams.  

“Yeeeaaahh, I don't know how many times I warned you not to keep hold of this one sided love you had. From what you told me, I could tell he wasn't really...um..” she stumbled over her words.  She didn't want to hurt him on this tender subject by being insensitive and was glad she caught herself.  He really was to blame, but she figured he'd already been admonishing himself about it enough.  “I'm.....really sorry that happened though.  You're gonna be okay, right?” Meiri comforted.  Her brother also just confirmed that there really is something going on between her boss and coworker like she had suspected. Though it was definitely not the right time to make a comment about that.  

“Hm?  Ah yes.  You have a strong big brother you know,” he replied.  His smile could've looked sad, but the fact that it really didn't really concerned Meiri.  

He's not hiding his sadness...is he? she mused.  “Well...just in case, you can always vent to me if need be.  Don't bottle up all that sadness behind this strong face of yours,”  Meiri smiled warmly at him, “I know you're strong.  You helped me through my own love troubles after all, so I know you could follow the advice you used to give me.  Though everyone was kinda surprised that you guys didn't have a screaming match like you usually do the last time you came up...well according to the rest of the Emeralds,” she laughed popping open her offered beer.  “But I guess that's just you being awkward in talking to him again?”

“We did have a nice chat to make sure there are no hurt feelings, but yes, it really is still a little awkward.  I can't avoid talking to him, though.  He runs one of my magazines,” he answered.  He was always able to talk with his sister like this.  They were each other's agony aunts if need be. Great at teasing each other, amazing at knowing how to love each other as siblings their age.  “Don't worry...I am weaning out of it, so hopefully I'll get to pal around with him again like we used to,”

/(^x^)\

It was a rather slow day at the office; it was still early in the cycle so nothing was chaotic just yet, but getting there.  Kirishima found himself already very agitated, however.  For some odd reason, Yokozawa seemed apprehensive about staying at his place.  Hiyori wasn't home either, she'd gone with her grandparents on a trip during the school holiday so he was getting terribly lonely.  He knows Yokozawa might be busy, but if that were really the case, the sales rep would actually be more straight forward.  Instead, when asked why, Yokozawa would not really make eye contact, or give an unsteady answer.  Only drawing suspicion from the editor in chief of Japun.

That's when a bright idea hit him.  If Yokozawa wasn't going to stay with him, he'd go stay with Yokozawa. He had his key, he could surprise him at home and get him to spill what the big deal was.  He had enough frustration pent up to see why Yokozawa seemed 'shyer' than usual.  Frustration in more ways than one.  

He'd managed to leave earlier than his mama bear which was perfect.  He not once had an awkward feeling about letting himself into Yokozawa's apartment.  He belongs to him after all.  Didn't take him too long to make it to his apartment either; even bought some beer for them to share.  Upon entering said apartment however, he would feel his heart drop to the floor.  There was someone napping on the couch and that person happened to be a woman.  A manga storyboard was spread out on the coffee table, but the strange woman in his lover's apartment held his attention.  What the hell?

Upon closer inspection, he actually recognized this woman as being the sole female of the Emerald team.  “Uehara...san?” his mood softened a bit as he remembered her being happily married and would at times gush about her husband, but he was still very very very confused.

As soon as Meiri heard her name she rose from her nap wondering why her brother was addressing her so formally.  She was still too drowsy to realize it wasn't him, “Come on Taka-chan we're not at work, you don't have to--” When she opened her eyes, she immediately jumped and hid behind the couch.  “Kyaaaa!”  Kirishima jumped as well when she screamed, but stood his ground.  

“K...Kirishima-san??!! Geez you scared the life out of me,” she said as soon as she recognized him.”What are you doing here....wait...how did you get in here?” Meiri tried to rub the fatigue out of her head.

“I'd like to ask you the same thing,” the awkwardness could really be felt in that moment. “But..Yokozawa gave me a key...”

“Well my reason is my husband is touring with the Legally Blonde Musical right now. So I stay with Taka-chan while he's gone,”

“Are you guys are really that close?” Kirishima asked, his heart tightened in his chest with painful confusion.  She was just a coworker...right? But she used what's considered a 'pet' name for him. Is she cheating on her husband? It was a shameful first thought and he was probably going to kick himself for it once this was ironed out.

Meiri came back around to the front of his sofa not sensing any danger; only confusion.  “I would like to believe so.  He might not have told you, but I'm his younger sister.”

A wave of relief just washed over him then (let the mental kicking begin).  And was probably too apparent when he gave a sigh of relief.  “Ooooh...you're his younger sister?!” he let himself relax in the chair opposite the couch.  

Now Meiri was wondering who Kirishima thought she was to Yokozawa.  “Yeah. And I'm assuming you're pretty close to him too?  You have his key don't you?  And from the look of it, you don't look like you're here to rob the place unless you're trying to steal our beer,” she noted the plastic bag he'd came in with.  

“Oh I brought this with me,” Kirishima then let a smile creep across his face as he got ready to answer her next question.  “You can say we're close.  Very. Close,”

Meiri blinked at his answer before letting a smile of her own reach her cheekbones as all the pieces were coming together.  “Are you perhaps the real reason he couldn't sit properly yesterday?”  

Kirishima snorted hearing that.  But he knew what she was getting at and definitely wasn't ashamed.  And what she was known for made him all the more comfortable in telling her. “Maaaybe,”

“Ahhhh  now I get it...it all makes sense now.  Aww but he was probably just waiting for the perfect time to tell me about you guys.  I think you just ruined a good surprise for me,”

“Well he didn't have to hide the fact that you were his sister.  You and I both work on the same floor, we're actually around each other more than I'm around him to be honest,”

“Oh actually...that's understandable,” she began.  “My celebrity status would be pretty troublesome for my family should everyone find out our relations.  Yes I'm a known yaoi author, but my husband makes it ten times worse by being a very popular actor for the Amuse agency,” she laughed a little while she explained.  “That kind of information shouldn't be thrown around so freely and he understands that.  So please realize it's really tricky when it comes to actually telling anyone, you shouldn't hold it against him,”

“Ah I guess you're right when you put it that way,” he smiled at her reaching for the beer he'd brought with him.  “Would you like one?”

“Sure!” she accepted his little gift.  “You know I could still act surprised about your relationship if you want.  Though I'm sure he knows I can easily figure these things out,” she motioned to her free lance storyboard on the coffee table.

“He's going to know the secret's out once he sees me sitting here talking to you,” Kirishima laughed a bit.  “I didn't tell him I'd be coming,”

“Yes, because if you did, he'd would've told me to expect you and I wouldn't have nearly wet my pjs,” she gave a soft glare at him.  

Kirishima laughed, “Ah I'm so sorry! I came over to surprise him not you.  See, he wouldn't give me a straight answer why he couldn't stay with me since my daughter was traveling with my parents.  So I came to confront him about it...”

“And you ended up confronting the reason instead,” Meiri playfully rolled her eyes.  “I have a feeling he must love your scheming,” she said sarcastically.

“Oh I'm confident he loves much more than that,” he smiled taking his first sip.

Meiri's heart skipped just then.  Could this be?  “So...my brother really found someone that...loves him back?” more a rhetorical question, yes.  She was just trying to let it sink in.  “I thought he was going to be so dispirited after he told me what happened with Takano-san, but...”

Kirishima gave a soft smile when the mood sobered up.  “I didn't let him have time to get that depressed and fall too hard. I caught him just in time,” he confirmed.  Of course he wasn't going to go into how he actually had to trap this wild bear before Yokozawa's feelings caught up with his own, but the point he was making was clear.  

Meiri felt a weight lift off her.  She actually started to worry about her brother being deeply depressed and he was hiding it from her.  She was even planning to keep a close eye on him since hearing the story, but now sees she really had no reason to worry at all.  Hearing these gentle words, her features then expressed so much joy and before the head editor could look up, he found himself in a sudden embrace.  “Thank you!!  Thank you so much!!  You don't how worried I was getting....you really don't....” her voice shook a little at the end of her statement.  

Kirishima was reminded then how he found Yokozawa that night in the bar.  The supposed night that Takano had declared his love for Onodera once and for all fully rejecting the one they both loved so much.  Hearing that her brother had to go through such pain must've weighed heavily on her own heart.  He put his free arm around her.  “I think I have a good idea of how worried you were.  He's an amazing man who has a wonderful family behind him that I hope to meet the rest of one day.  I also hope to share in all that family love from his side like he does from mine...”

Meiri's heart swelled so much. The emotion wouldn't let her stand on her feet while she was embracing him in the chair so she ended up letting herself fall into his lap.“I have the greatest feeling you already receive a lot of his love.  I can see these things remember?” she sat up from the embrace she had him in initially and began counting on her fingers. “You have a key to his place, he spends a lot of time at your house apparently, you just said he's been accepted by your family....and sorry to sound so awkward, but with the way his ass hurt yesterday...he actually let you make an uke out of him. He totally gave up his pride for you,” Meiri then began to crack up when the fact her brother was an uke was starting to sink in.  “Oh dear lord, my brother is an uke. How on earth did you manage that?” she laughed hard not really expecting an answer.

“I can tell you're not sorry about being awkward,” he scoffed directing attention to the fact that she was sitting his lap.  “And I actually don't know how I managed that to be honest,”

“Yeah you're right, I'm not sorry...but maybe I'm just happy I have a new Niichan!”she smiled brightly.  

Kirishima then felt his heart nearly explode.  Yokozawa's own sister was calling him her brother; though she had an odd way of showing it.  But just knowing this touched his heart to a great extent.  He was officially accepted by a member of his true love's immediate family.  “Really?  I can be your brother?” he asked soberly.

“Why wouldn't you be?  You...deeply love my brother, yes?”

“Of course! Never question that,” he declared.  “I keep suggesting he marry me and come to live with us,” that just slipped out without meaning to.  

“Ah!  Well see??  Then you are my new brother-in-law!” she answered his declaration with her own. Her heart leaped again hearing Kirishima say he wants to marry him.  

The chief editor's heart warmed. Already he was being treated like family by his loves dear sister. “Well if I am, then you should know you have a niece,”

“And I have a niece!! Yay!” she said excitedly flinging her arms around him again. She was very very excited.  It was like her brother went and got a family of his own without telling her, but she was far from holding it against him.  

“Eh...ah Uehara-san, your beer's getting warm,” Kirishima said really seeing if that would make her leave his lap.  She had some quirky ways of showing family affection at her age, he just wasn't used to it.  Not only that, he couldn't very well drink his own beer with her in his lap.  

“Ah...yes, yes it is!” She said getting up and heading over to where she left her beer, planting herself back in her spot on the couch.   “Call me Meiri-chan by the way.  If Taka-chan and even my fellow Emeralds call me that, then my new brother can definitely call me Meiri-chan,” she beamed.  

It was then the front door opened. “I'm home,” Yokozawa called as he came in.  He was paying attention to getting his shoes off at the genkan.  Not suspecting anything since  he wasn't looking up.

“Ah welcome home, Taka-chan!” Meiri greeted from her place on the couch.  

“Yes, welcome home Taka-chan,” Kirishima smiled following Meiri's lead.  The name Meiri used for Yokozawa tickled Kirishima to no end.  Perhaps he'll call him that from now on?

Yokozawa's heart nearly stopped seeing his partner and his sister sitting and chatting as if it were normal. “Oi, wh...what are you doing here?” the question obviously directed to his partner on the chair sitting opposite of Meiri.  

“Well you see, my fellow editor here wanted some advice so she called me here for a meeting,” Kirishima joked.  

“Oh so you're going to blame your surprise visit on me?  I see how it is...” she laughed at his teasing.  

“If you two think I'm going to buy that, you're both idiots...”

“Aww c'mon, It's not like I'm not welcome, right?” Kirishima put on his best puppy dog look. Yokozawa's response was a simple roll of his eyes.  Now there was just one thing worrying him.

“So um, what did I miss for this little 'meeting'?”  

Meiri had a feeling this would now start to get awkward.  “Well...I think a beer?  Don't worry, there's plenty more,” she put on another smile.  

“You know that's not what I'm talking about,” Yokozawa answered her seemingly innocent remark.  “I mean...you know now, don't you...” he didn't think it'd be time to tell her so soon.  The culprit who bumped up the date of coming out to her just took a sip of his beer while Yokozawa awaited her answer.

“Well...I know you probably wanted to wait until the perfect time....to tell me at some point that you were an uke,” Meiri said in a teasing manner.  She knew he was trying to be serious about this, but he really didn't have to bring the entire mood down with it.  

Kirishima nearly spit his drink; he wasn't expecting her to say it in that manner.  He tried as best he could not to bust out laughing while Yokozawa's eyes went wide.  “OI!  Y..you didn't have to tell her that much!!!” he shot at Kirishima; his face going red.  

“He didn't tell me crap!” Meiri cracked up; answering for the head editor.  “Just Kirishima-san having a key to your place told me everything.  Seeing as how it heavily links up to why you were so worn out with your back and ass hurting yesterday morning!  Do you know how many times I've written situations like this?”

“Oh how could I forget,” He wanted to yell and call her on her teasing, but there wasn't going to be a good come back.  Before he could say much more he found himself in an embrace.  His sister holding him tight.  

“Taka-chan....don't be embarrassed. I'm really really happy for you.  You finally found someone who loves you back.  I can tell just by talking with him he loves you so much. And you love him too don't you?”

Yokozawa blushed deeply at her words, “Y...yes...I do,” was all he could muster up while he returned her embrace.  He must've worried her when he told her what happened with Takano.  The perfect time to tell her about Kirishima was then and there and he felt silly now trying to keep it from her.  He squeezed her gently, “I'm sorry if I worried you,”

It was then that Kirishima came from behind Yokozawa and hugged them both.  “Hey no fair getting all the family love yourselves,”

“Yay group hug!” Meiri giggled knowing that this was embarrassing her brother quite a bit, but it was all in good fun.  “Aw come on Taka-chan, you don't need to blush that much,”

“Yeah Taka-chan!” Kirishima was having too much fun at this point.  “We're only family,”

Yokozawa's heart was now beating like crazy when he realize just how deep those words could go.  “Oh...kay you both can get off me now, I'm going to go change...” he said after swallowing the lump in his throat.

“Would you like any help?” Kirishima offered with a grin.  There was no point in being shy flirting with him in front of his sister.

“I think I can manage,” the grumpy bear shot at him. He didn't mean for it to sound harsh, but embarrassment in high levels usually made him bark.  And that's what they BOTH absolutely loved about him. “Now please let me go! ….both of you!!”

After he was in the bedroom, Kirishima sighed.  “Ahhh I think we made him grumpy...”

“I think you'll find that we always tease each other like that.   Stupid conversations like ours make us look like slapstick comedians to be honest.  So yeah welcome to the family!”

“Well..I look forward to the show! Hey I might even join in if I can,” he chuckled.  That did ease Kirishima a bit though.  He figured by the way she talked to him this wasn't as bad as it sounded, matter of fact, seemed like Yokozawa was used to it.  

It wasn't long before Yokozawa himself reemerged into the semi-awkward atmosphere.  “You better not be thinking to put this in one of your stories either Missy...”

“And you wonder why I can't come up with a new series,” Meiri teased him again.  

“Make hit series without my influence, please?” Yokozawa countered.

“D'aaawww c'mon, you don't think we'd make lovely characters in a BL?  All the fujoshis would just love your tsundere attitude!” Kirishima joined in.

“An uke and a tsundere...didn't know you had it in you!” Meiri chimed. “You really are the perfect boy love character!”

“Cut it out...” Yokozawa grumbled, but he knew it wasn't going to stop.  Meiri and his partner obviously hit it off really well.  Which was actually a lovely sight.  And with this he felt letting Kirishima meet their folks wasn't such a bad idea after all.    The night would wear on with beer and snarky jokes.  And Yokozawa couldn't be happier.

Author Remarks

I know this took a little bit longer.  Didn't intend for it to, but I had a hard time on deciding how I was going to start ^^;;  Damn my indecisiveness.  

[the-starchariot]

Man (a)

Nouns / phrases: Usually represents a man or boy - see paragraph As a person. Possibly also: "maleness" or "masculinity"; the influence male gender roles and stereotypes have on the querent. Situations or places where there's usually a majority of men (e.g. building site; military; football stadium).   Activities: To do something with a male person. Possibly: activities the querent considers "masculine". Attributes: Male; possibly: "masculine" (whatever that means to the querent). Concerning a male person. As a person: Represents the querent if the querent is male. If the querent is female, the Man represents either always the querent's spouse, steady boyfriend, or, if she is single, a love interest, or always the male person most relevant to the question asked - e.g. the querent's spouse, or an affair, friend, work colleague, male relative. As advice: If the Man represents the querent: "This is about you!". If the Man represents someone the querent knows: "This male person is very relevant to your concern!". Possibly: "Have a close look at how your ideas about what men are (or should be) like influence your situation!"   Time factor *) : When/if it happens depends on the Man. 

About the meaning: Note: There are two versions of the Man in my deck - you are now looking at Man (a). The following interpretations apply to both. Only the paragraph >> about the image differs from the one of >> Man (b). The Man, like the Woman, plays a special role in the Lenormand deck. He is (almost) exclusively used as the representative of a person: a man (or boy). Other than being male he carries no defining qualities - with the excecption I mention in the fourth paragraph. The Man represents the male querent: When the querent is male, the Man represents the querent. Other male persons are then always represented by other, "ordinary" cards (often used: Rider and Dog) - or, if you are reading with both versions of the Man, by the other Man. If the querent is female, see next two paragraphs. The Man represents the querent's steady partner: If the querent is female, according to one very common approach the Man automatically represents her male partner (husband or steady boyfriend) or, if she is single, her love interest - even if the question asked did not refer to the partner or love interest. According to this approach other male persons, e.g. an affair, or a male friend, are then represented by other, "ordinary" cards (e.g. Rider, Dog). For an alternative approach, see next paragraph. The Man represents the most relevant male person: I personally don't assign the Man strictly according to the method described above. For me the Man always represents the male person who is most relevant to the question asked. In many cases, who this most relevant man is will be immediately clear, especially when the question asked explicitly concerns a specific man, e.g. "How do I make my boyfriend happy?". In such cases, the Man definitely represents the male person named in the question. But if no man is named in the question I don't assign an identity to the Man automatically. Of course, people's partners usually do have a major influence on their lives. So in many cases the most relevant male person will indeed be the steady partner. But that is not necessarily the case! To find out who the most relevant male person in each individual case and context is I usually talk to the querent about the different possibilities, and I also check if the cards surrounding the Man give more clues about his identity. As I said, very often he will indeed be the husband (or life partner, fiancee, or steady boyfriend). But it is not at all uncommon that the male person who is most significant within the context of the question turns out to be some other man - e.g. the man the querent has a secret affair with, or a male relative (e.g. father, son, brother), a platonic friend, or a colleague at work, a man of whose existence the querent isn't aware of yet, or even her imagined "ideal" man which she can't let go of! Also, sometimes, the identity of the Man remains mysterious. And sometimes when a reading doesn't make sense no matter from which angle I approach the cards I suspect that this is because I have assigned the wrong identity to the Man, so of course the other cards make no sense. Which qualities does the Man carry? The Man represents someone who is of the male gender. For many readers, including me, this is the only fixed attribute the card has: maleness. Whether the male person is young or old, happy or sad, honest or deceiving, in control or helpless, which hopes he has, what motivates him etc., is not fixed but has to be gleaned from his position in the spread and from the qualities the cards surrounding him indicate. However, even while insisting that maleness is his only defining attribute some readers still go a step further. They assign a number of additional qualities to the card which they believe are inherently male - or "masculine". I have, for example, seen people interpret the Man as assertive, rough, or rational, behaviour. But this is a view of gender which makes me uncomfortable. It implies very limiting and judgemental assumptions about what a "true" man is. It implies that a man who doesn't strongly broadcast these qualities but their opposites, for example a man who prefers to yield instead of asserting himself, is less of a man, is "feminine". And it implies that a woman who doesn't like to submit to others and prefers to assert herself is somehow less of a woman, masculine. But I think that when a man is gentle he is not a man with strong "feminine" tendencies; he is a gentle man. When a woman is dominant, this doesn't make her masculine - she is just a dominant woman. In short: I don't assign character qualities to the Man (nor the Woman) because I think character qualities cannot be divided along the line of gender. The impact of male gender roles and stereotypes on the querent: As I wrote above I don't think that (seemingly) dichotomous qualities like assertiveness/gentleness or rationality/emotionality should be assigned to specific genders. However, this is what many, maybe most, people do. And these ideas about what is inherently male and female will also impact their behaviour greatly. It will influence how they see themselves, how they judge others, and it will impact the decisions they make for themselves and for others. So when the Man turns up in a reading for a male querent, the card might indicate that the querent's ideas of what a "real" man, a "proper" man is, influence the situation he is asking about. They could for example influence what options he thinks are available to him, or the ways he goes about achieving what he wants to achieve, or whether he allows himself to go for what he wants at all. And something similar applies to readings for female querents. Their ideas of what is male, or masculine, will influence how they judge the men in their lives, and it will influence which behaviour, which decisions, they allow themselves as women (e.g. "I must take care not to appear harsh!" or "No, I can't keep insisting on this - I'm supposed to be accommodating!"), and it will influence how they treat men (e.g. "Men are strong, tough creatures, I will just let him handle this strenuous task, he won't mind / will be able to handle it better than I!") Other: In a few rare cases it has turned out quite productive to interpret the Man as situations or places were there's a majority of men (e.g. politics; military; football field etc.). But I usually only apply this meaning when it is strongly indicated by the context (e.g. the querent is looking for social connections) - or by surrounding cards. I might, for example, interpret the combination of Man + Ring as "men's association" or Man + Dog as "men's support group". 

About the Image: The Man by himself: What is probably most peculiar about my Man is that he is walking ahead of the viewer, right into the card - thus, the viewer cannot see his face. I ended up with this design because, as I write above at great length, the Man represents no specific qualities other than that he's of the male gender. If I'd shown the Man's face, I would have had to give him specific facial expressions, a specific age, and race. Even if I'd have chosen to give him a neutral, slightly bored facial expression (which many Lenormand decks do) - what if the querent were highly agitated at the time they asked me for a reading? Or what if I painted a youngish Man but the man the querent was asking about was an old gentleman? So I decided to paint him from an angle which doesn't show his face. What you can say about my Man is that yes, here is someone who is almost certainly of the male gender because the clothes he wears strongly indicate it. Other than that, not much is fixed. There is no way of telling whether he is young or old, happy or sad, what skin colour he has. He could be very slim underneath the thick, bulky, warm winter clothes, but he could also be quite chubby. Thus I hope it is easy to have the Man represent anyman you know.   If you put yourself in the Man's shoes you will find yourself walking; walking along a path leading away into the distance. Both the path and the fact that the Man is walking are to show that every person's life is always an ongoing process, that every person's life contains things that they have left behind, things that are part of their present moment, and things that lie in their future. To emphasise the passage of time even more I painted autumn leaves and ripe grapes in the immediate foreground, winterly snow around the Man 's feet, and the landscape in front of him turning slowly into spring. Thus, he is moving through the seasons, forward through time. I already mentioned the grapes in the foreground. Grapes are also in the basket the Man is carrying on his back. They represent that which he is carrying with him out of his past into his present and onward to the future. If he is smart, he has left anything foul behind and is only bringing along the good stuff which, with skill and patience, can be turned into valuable wine which will be able to nourish him for months to come, until the next harvest can be brought in. The Man (a) in relation to Woman (a): If you compare Man (a) and Woman (a) you will notice that I placed them in very similar environments. Apart from some minor differences it could even be the same, one, environment. The most important reason for me to design the two cards in this way was that even in the cases when Man/Woman do not represent a couple they still always represent two people who are in somekind of a relationship, who share at least part of their respective realities. When Man and Woman are facing each other it looks a bit like they were walking along the same snowy path. In this case, just as they share the same path, are heading towards a shared future, the fruit each of them has collected will probably be shared, too - enjoyed together, or, if the fruit are rotten, they both will suffer the consequences. I took care, though, to make the path on each of the cards branch out. So the Man and the Woman won't necessarily continue to walk along the same one. They could also take diverging directions in the future.   When Man and Woman are facing away from each other they still share the same environment but it looks a bit as if they were walking along different paths. And it seems that they are both busy with their own, separate, tasks. Maybe they will later share the fruit that they have collected, but maybe they won't. If they won't they might miss out on shared enjoyment, but they might also be spared unpleasant consequences if the fruit their partner has collected turns out bad. The Man (a) in relation to Man (b): One reason why my Lenormand deck contains two Men and two Women is so that same sex friends, relatives, or lovers, could do relationship readings in which both representative person cards conform with their genders. Since the two Men cards are supposed to represent two men who are in some kind of relationship I wanted the two images to relate in form and content, too. If you look at Man (a) and Man (b) you will hopefully make the association that the grapes Man (a) has been collecting are intended for his friend or lover, as nourishment! And the warm room Man (b) is building will shelter Man (a) from the cold when he has finished his work outside. This interlacing is to express that both Men fulfil an important role in their mutual relationship. Moreover, their shared reality is also hinted at by the fact that the landscape Man (a) is walking through is very similar to the landscape outside of the window of Man (b). . The Man (a) in relation to Woman (b): Another reason why my Lenormand deck contains two Men and two Women is so that there is the possibility to pair Man and Woman cards in which Man and Woman face in the same direction. Some readers are used to (or prefer) this option. Again, since these different pairings would also represent two people who are in some kind of relationship I wanted the two respective images to relate visually as well. If you look at Man (a) you'll see that the dusky pink yarn Woman (b) has finished spinning doesn't only resemble the colour of her own dress but also the colour of the Man's pants. The landscape Man (a) is walking through appears to be the same as the one outside of Woman (b) 's window. And the grapes Man (a) has been collecting are also found in a bowl behind Woman (b). So, not only do Woman (b) and Man (a) share the same reality, they are also bound together by what they do for each other. To make it even easier, visually, to pair Woman (b) and Man (a), it's not just the colour of their garments which is similar, but both cards also have frames of a similar warm reddish-brown hue.  

Man-Rider Man who is: New - in the sense of unfamiliar, changed; able to change you, in a hurry, quick, surprising, active, energetic, flamboyant, pushy, cocky, intrusive, importunate, shrill, harsh. A man brings something (e.g. e message), approaches, acts, causes change, charges, attacks, harasses, intrudes, meddles, intervenes, pushes for something, grandstands. To approach a man; to beset or harass a man. Attempts to change a man. A traditionally "male" approach. Man-Clover Man who is: a lucky devil; happy-go-lucky, easygoing, not-serious; joking, humorous, playful, unimportant, irrelevant. Irresponsible, unburdened, has no responsibilities, doesn't do his bit; a gambler or risk-taker. To chance something regarding a man; to take a man (or men in general) not seriously. To toy with a man / man who toys with us. To joke/fool around with a man. To keep it light with a man. Man-Ship Man who is absent, missing, gone away, very distant, travelling, not there yet, on the way, (ad)venturous, yet to be learned to know, exploring, seeking, searching, full of wanderlust; fidgety, ready to leave, not committed. To leave a man; to look for a man; to explore a man (or manhood). A man makes changes. An explorer, a traveller, a foreigner. Man-House Man who is: native, at home, at home with something, a family member, well-established, settled, private, familiar, used to or intimate with you; close-minded regarding anything which is new/unfamiliar, xenophobic, orderly, normal, regular, simple, planning ahead, low-risk, safe, conservative, inflexible, anti-innovative. Male family member; a creature of habit, stay-at-home dad. Man moves in, starts a family, settles with something, keeps something private, wants things to stay as they are. Patriot. Family man. A man's privacy. (Traditional) rules or roles which apply to men specifically. Man-Tree Man who is: natural, physical, alive, thriving, deeply rooted, grounded, belonging, steadfast, robust, inflexible in the sense of not versatile, down-to-earth, pragmatic. A male ancestor. To grow into manhood. Healer. Male body, or traditionally "masculine" physique. Male-specific health issues. Man does something in nature; man who is close to nature, does something physical. Man-Clouds Man who is: confused, insecure, desperate, lost. A shady character, man who is hiding something, putting up a smoke-screen. Deceiver. Man in need of guidance. Man who lacks interest (or who lacks interesting characteristics), is listless. Deadhead. A man the querent can't see / doesn't see as who he really is. Man-Snake Man who is: eager, covetous, avid, attracted to someone or something, power-hungry, thirsty for knowledge (inquisitive), horny, addicted, seductive, ambitious, single-minded, goal-oriented, focused, motivated, driven, ruthless, calculating, egotistical, inconsiderate, strong-willed, headstrong, tenacious, shrewd, skilful, (smart), diplomatic, manipulative. Type A personality man, lawyer, politician, diplomat. A man goes his own way. An affair with a man. To feel attracted to, seduce, manipulate, or coerce, a man. Man-Coffin Man who has died. Man who's suffered loss; man who hasn't let go of something (or, a man who is in the process of letting go). Widower. Man who is suppressing a lot or buried his dreams. To let go of a man; grief over the loss of a man. To suppress the man inside ourselves. To not allow a man to live life to the fullest. Man-Bouquet Man who is: invited; on a visit, convivial, sociable; socially active. Man who is affable, well-mannered. Man who is appreciated by the querent, or generally praiseworthy. Man who is flirtatious, or ingratiating. Bootlicker. Handsome man; groomed man. A peacock. Man who tends to exaggerate or whitewash things. A welcome visitor, a host. Interior designer, hairdresser, stylist, plastic surgeon etc. To show appreciation to a man; to flatter or flirt with a man or men in general. To visit a man; give a present to a man. Man-Scythe Man who is: efficient, blunt, does unexpected or hurtful things. Man who has cut you off. A male ex-partner. Divorcee. To cut off or hurt a man. Man reaps what he has sown. To get what you deserve from a man. To tie up lose ends or settle scores with a man. Man cleans up. Man with a sharp tongue /who can hurt you. Man-Whip Man who is: a cynic, snarky, judgemental - or ashamed; guilty. Prosecutor, lawyer, judge, police officer. To criticise, insult, shame, or abuse, a man. Man who beats himself up about something. Aggressive man, abuser. Misandry. To feel ashamed for being a man. Argument with a man. Man is guilty; man makes amends. Man-Birds Man who is: excited, exhilarated, agitated, (over)stimulated, busy, preoccupied, fussy, nervous, stressed, on alert, not relaxed, skittish. Man who is talkative, gossipy. Man who is brooding, worried, anxious. Man with obsessive-compulsive disorder. Man who is fidgety, restless, fickle, chaotic, unorganised, distracted. Man who distracts, annoys. Man who is quick to react, or prone to knee-jerk reactions. Quick-witted, mobile, agile man. Man with ADHD, multitasker, blabbermouth. Man difficult to assess or who it would be unwise to rely on because he is so fickle. To bother a man; gossip or worries about a man; to distract or talk over (and not listen to) a man. Man-Child Boy, (grand)son. Father of a child. A man who wants a child. Man who is: Childlike, infantile, delicate, cute, weak, sensitive, vulnerable, defenceless, non-threatening young (at heart), new, innovative, inquisitive, playful, inexperienced, in need of guidance, guileless, innocent, naive, gullible, immature. To belittle a man or men in general. Man takes the first step. To want the man to initiate. It's a baby boy! Man-Fox Man who is cautious, streetwise, maybe overly suspicious or defensive. Man who looks after himself well, or is selfish or follows his own agenda. Man with a lot of integrity. Man whose character is difficult to assess since he seems to change constantly, depending on his surroundings. Trickster. To identify with the male gender. Man-Bear Father or father figure. Male boss, leader, teacher, protector. Man who is: strong, dominant, protective, choleric, bossy, possessive, competent, wealthy. Possibly: To protect a male person; to make a big show of one's masculinity; appearing masculine (or male) dominates life. Depending on context: to protect oneself or someone else against a man. Man-Stars Man who is: hopeful, trusting, spiritual; or has a lot of unfulfilled wishes. Man who aspires to something, who dares to reach for the stars. Daydreamer / daydreams about a man. Man in the querent's future. To idealise a man or men in general. To have faith in a man without good reason, or to have trust in a man (with good reason). Man we feel deeply connected with. Man-Stork Man who is: a migrant, relocating, transitioning, transforming, returning, full of longing. Man who acts instinctively, follows his inner nature. A man by (inner) nature. To long for or reconnect with a man. Something inevitable concerning a man. Man-Dog Man who is: a friend, an employee, a follower, helpmate. Man who is devoted, loyal, supportive, wants to be led, needs approval or praise, doesn't think for himself. To befriend a man. To ask a man for permission. To do what a man (or men in general) say; to crave the approval of a man or men in general. Man-Tower Man in a top position, e.g. boss. Man who is denying, forbidding, solitary, emotionally distant, lonely, isolated, aloof, disciplined, clear-headed, independent, on top, leading, the best, proud, snotty, arrogant, controlling, authoritarian, in power. Segregation of men. Male authority. Single parent, widower. Authority over a man; to lord it over men. Man who has authority over the querent. A male expert. Organisations run by or for men. Patriarchy. To think about a man rationally. Man who rises above. Man-Garden A man is exposed. Man who exposes, reveals something. Man who goes along with the mainstream, with what's commonly accepted. Men's collective, men's union. To show up a men. Men with no sense of privacy. Men who is in the public eye (e.g. politician); men who networks, men for whom public opinion and/or his reputation is very important. To present as male. To meet a man in public. Men in society. Male-dominated (sub)culture. Man-Mountain Man who is: difficult, problematic, restrictive, impaired, challenging, conspicuous, present, big, tall, heavy, overweight, unmoved, blocked, rigid, quiet, silent, stubborn, persisting, unwilling or refusing to do something. Male nemesis or contender. Problems with masculinity. Difficulties/challenges specific to men. To challenge a man. To have problems with a man or men in general. To hinder a man. A man gives us the silent treatment (or the other way around). Man-Crossroad Man who is: one of two or more potential partners / male friends / fathers etc. Man who is confronted with an important decision. Man who is hesitant, indecisive, in two minds, tarrying, ambivalent about something, tolerant. To deliberate or speculate about a man. Decision about a man. Man who is difficult to assess because he keeps changing directions. Man with many faces. Man-Mice Man who is: poor, lost, losing weight, bad, deteriorating, degenerated, secretive, covert, sneaky, crooked, unfrank, disingenuous, unwholesome, unhealthy, sick, infected, corrupt, corrupting, dirty, doing things behind someone's back. Man who is faced with theft, corruption, or exploitation - or one who's the perpetrator. Thief. Man who is exhausted or getting weaker. Man who isn't good for us. To badmouth a man or men in general. To spy on a man; to do something behind a man's back. Energy vampire; man who sucks you dry. Man-Heart Man who is: a romantic, in love, infatuated. Man who is loving, affectionate, tender, gentle, sweet-tempered, soft-hearted. Man who mollycoddles others. Man who is good at heart, compassionate, caring, altruistic, charitable, magnanimous, merciful, selfless. Man who is forgiving. Man who is involved with all his heart. Male lover. Man who the querent is in love with. To love a man; to care for a man, to give solace to a man. To forgive a man. To mollycoddle a man. Man-Ring Man who is: committed, well-connected, bound by something or who the querent is bound to. Man the querent is in some sort of relationship with, e.g. lover, spouse, business partner. Man we have something in common with. Male bonding. Promise from a man, or to a man. Man who is dependable, or (annoyingly) predictable. Man-Book Man who is: well-educated, intelligent, intellectual, knowledgeable, in the know, known. An academic, a scientist, teacher or professor - possibly a student, depending on the question. Truth about a man; facts about a man. To get to know a man. To tell the truth to a man or about a man. To categorise someone as male / masculine. Man-Letter Man who is: communicative, likes to share what he thinks/feels/knows. Man with expressive gestures or facial expressions. Communication with a man; conversation with a man or about a man. Expressions of manhood. Postman, host of radio show, mediator, speaker, pen pal. Man(a)-Man(a) Everything hinges on the person the Man represents. A male person is very relevant to the querent's concern! Possibly: The male querent's ideas about what men are (or should be) like influence his situation (e.g. his decisions, or how he views himself) tremendously / the female querent's ideas about what men are (or should be) like influence her situation (e.g. her relationship with her spouse, or how she treats men in general). Man(a)-Woman(a) A man and a woman do something together. Husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend. There's a close relationship between a woman and a man. Possibly: because there are no cards between them which define what holds them together maybe they don't share much. If you wish you can view the fact that they are looking towards each other as a sign they still very much want to keep up the relationship, but maybe should still look for more things to share so they will not start to drift apart eventually. Also: A man shows characteristics viewed as "feminine" by the querent (or society). A man does traditionally "female" things. Man(a)-Man(b) A male person is very relevant to the male querent's concern! Two men do something together. There's a very close relationship between two men. A man and his friend, boyfriend, or husband. In this case: because there are no cards between them which define what holds them together maybe they don't share much - which could be a danger to the relationship eventually. If you wish you can view the fact that they are looking away from each other as a sign they will soon drift apart (if they don't find things to share). Possibly: The male querent's ideas about what men are (or should be) like influence his situation (e.g. his decisions, or how he views himself) tremendously. A traditionally masculine man; a man does traditionally "male" things. Man(a)-Woman(b) A man and a woman do something together. Husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend. There's a close relationship between a woman and a man. Possibly: because there are no cards between them which define what holds them together maybe they don't share much. If you wish you can view the fact that they are looking towards each other as a sign they still very much want to keep up the relationship, but maybe should still look for more things to share so they will not start to drift apart eventually. Also: A man shows characteristics viewed as "feminine" by the querent (or society). A man does traditionally "female" things. Man-(Sensual)Lily Man who is: sensual, sexually active, passionate, enticing, attractive, artistic, talented, creative, intense, contented, comfortable, peaceful, mature, , self-indulgent, lazy, gluttonous, drunk, high, excessive. Man who enjoys the arts; artist (poet, dancer, musician, painter...); man only interested in sensual/sexual pleasure. Man who takes his time. Or: a lover (real or prospective or dreamed of). To go slowly with, caress, or pleasure, a man. Poetry or music or paintings by or about a man or men in general. Man-(Virtuous)Lily Man who is: virtuous (in general, or specifically e.g. prudent, just, frugal, etc.), holier-than-thou, moralistic, self-righteous, pure, clean, well-intended, honest and upfront, righteous, innocent, blameless, wise, unassuming, impartial, humble, meek, peaceful (undisturbed, unagitated), content (modest), restrained, moderate, modest, sober, abstinent, chaste, austere, self-chastising, uptight, frigid. Goody-two-shoes. Moraliser. Man who is celibate - possibly a monk. Virgin. To do the morally right thing regarding a man. To make peace with a man. Man makes peace with something or someone. Man-Sun Man who is: sunny, warm, brilliant, glowing, clearly visible, superficial, awake, aware, conscious, easy-going, happy, joyful, merry, celebratory, charismatic, popular, famous, successful, confident, extroverted, optimistic. Obviously a man. Man who is the querent's sunshine. Man who broadcasts something very strongly. Strong male vibes. To make a man happy. To warm (up), brighten the mood of, a man. To show a man clearly that X; to proof to a man that X. To spend a day with a man. To wake a man up. To be aware or make aware of a man; to enjoy, have fun with, celebrate, a man or men in general. Possibly: to go on a vacation with a man. Man who doesn't hide his light under a bushel. Man keeps up appearances / to keep up appearances for a man. Man-Moon Man who has a lot of depth. Man who is: quiet, restful, resting, tired, sleepy, sleeping, dark (literally and figuratively speaking), obscure, half-aware, unconscious (of something), full of foreboding, intuitive, emotional, soulful, fearful, needy, sad, melancholic, emotionally upset, traumatised. A man at night/in the evening. Man of great significant for the querent or for answering the querent's question. A lot of feelings (not necessarily romantic!) for a man. Traumatised by a man. To spend a night with a man. To rest in the company of a man. Man-Key Man who is: Open-minded, open-hearted, unguarded, prying (not respecting your boundaries), accessible, accepting, welcoming, liberated, relieved, inspired, inspiring, inventive, understanding, insightful. A man who is our key to success, or who we view as a means to an end. To welcome or say yes to a man. To free or relieve a man; to understand a man or men in general. That which gives us access (to the heart or mind) of a man. Man-Fish Man who is: fulfilled; has (had) enough, wealthy, expensive (to keep), greedy, tight-fisted; valued; cherished, esteemed. Man who is self-employed, working hard. Male business partner. To value men(s opinion, presence etc.). A man values something, cherishes something, is looking for profit. Capitalist, man with a job to do with money. Man who views love or happiness etc. as something he can buy. To "buy" a man. To profit from a man. Too many men; too much of one man. That which the querent values in a male partner, or in men in general. Traditionally "male" values. To profit from male gender roles or stereotypes. Man-Anchor Man who is abiding, has halted, stopped. Long-term male resident. Man is being held up or held back, caught, stuck, confined, restrained. Man who is stable, firm, secure, safe, "solid as rock", focused. Man with very set daily routines, mundane interests. Man we view as normal, ordinary, bland, boring. Man who stays, who sticks with us, clings to us, who can't let go; a stalker. To cling to a man; to confine or restrain or hold back a man. The man everything revolves around / everything revolves around men. To focus on a man. Man we share our daily life with. To hold on to, or find security in, traditionally male gender roles. Confining views about masculinity. Man-Cross Man who is: ideological, religious, convinced of something, principled, dogmatic, absolutist, intolerant, uncritical, doesn't question. Man who is dutiful, responsible. Man who is burdened, or burdensome, exhausted or exhausting, who is in pain, suffering. Minister, monk. Man who is a burden to us; man who we feel destined to know/be in a relationship with. Responsibility for a man; duties to a man. Traditionally male duties; specifically male sufferings. Absolutist convictions of what is "male", or of how men should behave.

[ukrrs1928]

It was a hot July day in 1971. I was thinking about how I wanted to be anywhere else but here.  Where was here?    At that time it was somewhere in rural east central Missouri.  I am not exaggerating- it was hot.  Incredibly hot and humid.  Humid like summer in Missouri can only be- humid! Made more intolerable by the inefficient poor air conditioning systems that existed in automobiles at that time as we made the seemingly endless journey to our destination.

But this was a family trip.  We were visiting an elderly relative (the specific relationship I don’t recall) of my mother who was convalescing at a country nursing home. What little I remember about the home is that it was at the end of a long gravel road.  Sort of on a hill.  Back then travel on gravel roads in the countryside was not that uncommon.  My recollection is that it looked like an old large farmhouse that had somehow been converted to this institutional use.

This was my first experience visiting a nursing home.  I have a distinctive recall of an odd mixture of hospital smell with something more putrid – urine-like.  The home was not air conditioned so the inside was like the outside- hot and humid which only added to the uncomfortable environment.

So here I was visiting a relative- someone that I had never met.  I reluctantly trudged up the stairs.  When we arrived in the room I felt very uncomfortable as an insecure kid.  I did not know what to say.  I did not know anything about this person and did not know what to say to make her feel more comfortable.  I wasn’t comfortable, either physically or emotionally, so how could I possibly make her more comfortable?  I couldn’t.

This was one layer of my experience, but not the most disturbing.  More disturbing to me was that her roommate was in conversation…..with someone.  But that someone was not apparent to me nor anyone else in the room.  As time went along, she became more animated and loud in her conversation.  She became agitated and loud.  This bothered me a lot.  I wanted to get out of there and try to erase the experience from my mind.  Obviously, this was not possible.

This was my first experience with someone with dementia.  Dementia is a broad term that includes many ailments that describe memory loss.  (Source: 1). With some forms of memory loss, it is not uncommon to have moments of delusion or hallucination.

One of the more commonly known dementia forms is Alzheimer’s.  This disease is named after and German physician- Alois Alzheimer who diagnosed the disease in 1901. (Source: 2)

As the U.S. baby boomer generation has aged we have seen incidences of many illnesses associated with the aging increase.  Certainly, various forms of dementia fall into this category.

By 2050 more than 20 percent of the U.S. population will be 65 or older.   (Source: 3) A big part of the reason for this is that we have more food and better health care and technology than ever before. So again a  by-product of this aging trend is that we are seeing more instances of certain diseases.

While medicine struggles to find appropriate treatments and possible cures for various forms of dementia, like Alzheimer’s, one thing that has been identified as important in dealing with our aging trends is providing a sense of community for care of those with memory loss issues.

One such program, which is modeled after the highly successful, United Kingdom version is- Dementia Friendly America (DMA).  Not only does DMA provide toolkits and training for groups and society segments to aid in our community development need, but it provides online training for individuals who want to become dementia friends.

By taking this short online training course you can help become part of a community that is needed to help those who struggle with memory loss.  It will help you recognize those who are in need and how to deal with situations that may seem odd or even uncomfortable for you.

Become a dementia friend by participating in the brief online training.  I did as I recognized my need to develop the skills and knowledge to help me become a valuable COMMUNITY member.  A COMMUNITY member who can now help others instead of feeling helpless like that young kid back in the 1970’s.

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Resources:

Dementia Friendly America Without Warning- Younger Onset Alzheimer’s Disease Too Soon To Forget- The Documentary

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Sources:

1. “Dementia.” Merriam-Webster.com. Merriam-Webster, 2018. Web. 13 May 2018.

2. Wikipedia contributors. (2018, April 28). Alzheimer’s disease. In Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. Retrieved 15:56, May 28, 2018, from https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Alzheimer%27s_disease&oldid=838683201

3. Ortman, Jennifer M.,  Velkoff, Victoria A., and Hogan, Howard. An Aging Nation: The Older Population in the United States.  May 2014 https://www.census.gov/prod/2014pubs/p25-1140.pdf

Community- For Those Who Live In The Moment It was a hot July day in 1971. I was thinking about how I wanted to be anywhere else but here.