#they heard england and said okay like the american version of an english accent? and came up with a georgia accent 😂

[guinevereslancelot]

i'm watching murder she wrote w my mom and so many characters have these super fake accents that sound like they're trying to be posh southern accents i think its supposed to be what californians think a new england accent is 😂😂😂

[luvdsc]

hey!! it’s 🧋 anon!! i hope you’re doing well! thank you!! ive got 11 more exams this coming week so i’m a lil 🥲 and then 3 more maybe the week after? exactly! i was so paranoid in the exam like “am i suddenly smart or a grade a idiot?” but it’s comforting to know that others feel the same about tests in general 😅. i’m learning python! i know there are better languages but ehhhh it’s just high school sjdnndn. and thank you about my bias choice sjsjndn. oh no not the 10th floor 😭 i’ve heard horror stories 🤧 i just can’t get over how sweet, funny and gentle he seemed in the jolly interview 🥺. thank you!! for letting me claim 🧋! and i wish i could say the same about not knowing that it was released but i’ve legit been checking since pre-quarantine for a boba emoji bc emojipedia said it would be coming out 😭 i had to start claiming it soon bc i’m NOT letting someone take it from me 😠 (but also! look how cute these are: 🦤🦭🐻‍❄️🐈‍⬛ ). as for my regular boba order, i’m still a lil new to the boba world bc i first (finally) tried it like 2 weeks before quarantine 😭. so everytime i go to this boba place (which is hardly ever for obvious reasons) i try to get something different! bc it all seems so cool!! the place i go to has popping bubbles in different flavours! so i always try to get a different drink with different popping bubbles and regular boba. i think my favourite so far is any drink (maybe mango?) with apple popping bubbles and boba!! but i’ve also been making boba at home for agessss and i usually just make regular tea or green tea with it! 💗

awww 😭 thank you ma’am sksndjdj. i mean, you do give off very motherly energy so i’ll happily accept being a baby 🥺 awww you think my accent is cute? ms cat i’m blushing 😭🥺 oof yeah the exams are not fun™️. but like you said, it does kinda prepare us for them more but the stresssssss is 🥲😭 okay so i’ll answer these in order if that’s okay?

do you still have class going on in between these exams? i assume you mean specifically when we have exams? so unfortunately yeah😭 it depends on the teacher as to wether they’ll let us revise in lesson or if we have to do regular work

do the gcse’s determine your college field of study afterwards? kinda? i mean, colleges have a minimum enterance requrement for courses. although it varies course to course, it’s usually somewhere around the 4-5 (high c-low b) mark. but you can do any course you want at college as long as you have passes in most subjects (usually an emphasis on core subjects (english, maths and science)). (so like, if you didn’t do history in high school, but you wanted to do it in college, then you could do the course as long as you meet the courses’ gcse grade requirements).

is college different from uni? yeah! college is for 2 years and straight after high school. in england you legally have to be in education until you’re 18, so all education is free until then, meaning that college is free! (unless you want to go back to do something else later in life). uni is after college and is optional. that’s where you get things like a bachelor’s, masters and doctoral degree. usually it’s for 3 years although it can vary and you have to pay! we have a student loan system too!

don’t worry about the questions! i enjoy the differences too sjdbbdd. and oooo! here, high school is 11-16/year 7-11, then college is (usually) 16-18/year 12-13 (although we don’t tend to refer to them by years) and uni is (usually) 19-22! (although you tend to go back to that for higher qualifications).

ansnsekndj i’m sorry ms cat 😭 and for me college will start in september of next year! we finish year 11 really early compared to the other years (usually we finish in july (my birthday month!!) but in year 11 we finish the day our last exam happens! which is usually around the end of may to the start of june!) so the holiday is the longest we’ll ever have 😭. that’s one of the reasons i envy americans because the summer breaks are SO long 😭 here, they’re 6 weeks sksndn.

i hope i answered all of your questions ms cat! ily! 🐈‍⬛💗~🧋

hi, lovebug!!! 💓 i’m going to put my answers under the cut since they got pretty long 🤧

i’m doing good!! i got soo much sleep over the weekend and am well rested, so this means tomorrow’s 6 am meeting won’t be too bad 🤧 YOU HAVE ELEVEN EXAMS THIS WEEK???? what on earth 😭 that’s like 2 per day and one day has 3 aksjlhflajkdfaskdjf why don’t they spread them out??? and three more the following week 💀💀 this sounds absolutely brutal, i’m so sorry, lovebug. have you been studying for all of them? LOL yeah, i feel like something is wrong if i can just breeze through a test akjdlhsflask python is a good start and easy to understand! honestly, most codes are pretty similar tbh, so once you get a good grasp of one, it’s easy to learn the other ones :’) do you enjoy cs? 💕 aldskjfaslk yeah, jaehyun does seem like the perfect boyfriend, doesn’t he? 🤧💘 LOL i heard there would be a boba emoji, but i didn’t know if it was true or not, but woooo it’s good to know it’s finally here!! 🥳 and omg the dodo bird and seal emojis 🥺💗 those are all sooo cute!!! aslhfdlkjasd first time trying boba, i just gasped out loud 😦 i’m so happy to hear that you enjoyed it once you tried it though! 💜 omg the popping bubbles are really yummy! and i LOVE mango!!! 🤩 that’s one of my favorite fruits :’) same with apple!! omg you’re making boba at home asdjhfas i’m so jealous 🤧 i haven’t had any boba ever since quarantine started in march 😭 aaaah i loooove green tea and black tea ones :’) have you tried the cheese boba tea before? i thought it wasn’t going to be that good, but i was pleasantly surprised with the taste, like it wasn’t that bad actually. cloud tea is also really nice, too ☁️💞

akjashdlfkja you are the absolute cutest omg 🥺💖 the british accent is sooo nice like wow, you can just be reading me your grocery lists and i’m like 🤩 amazing, perfect, wonderful, never been done before. meanwhile, i’m here with some kind of american valley girl accent LOL 🤧 you shouldn’t be having that much stress at 15 what the heck 😭 i wish they would cut down on the number of exams for you because having 11 in one week is not okay at all ): and oh my goodness, thank you sooo much for giving me such thorough answers to all my questions, honey bee 🥺💛💛✨

ah, we also have classes going on during exams too, so i can relate unfortunately. it really sucks when the teachers continue to teach new material, instead of helping you prepare for the big exams /:

ooo i see!! i think it’s really cool that colleges actually show minimum requirements for acceptance. here, there’s no set criteria at all, so it’s kind of a shot in the dark. they do post the averages of past students’ grades/scores and whatnot, so we have a vague idea of what each school wants, but some schools are weird af, like my friend with a lower gpa and less extracurriculars got into stanford university, meanwhile my one friend who won essentially the youth’s version of the nobel prize and was even acknowledged by obama during his presidency was waitlisted 😬

oh wow, i wish it was like that here :o education is so expensive in the US, like student debt is the norm. do you still have general education classes in college, or is this where you can choose a specific field of study? and university is only 3 years oh my gosh wow, only three years of tuition to pay!! the US could never /: it’s like 70k/year for private universities, 5k-15k/year for public schools in state, and 15k-35k/year for public schools if you’re out of state 💀

the words “college” and “university” are pretty much interchangeable here in the US, so that’s really cool to know! years 6-8 / ages 11-13 (i think that’s the age range?) is considered middle school here, so it’s interesting to see that some of those years are considered high school for you :o

ooo ok, that’s when my school years ended too back in high school! i ended in may and started school again in august. but in uni, i started in september and ended mid june :’) ah yes, our summers are around 2-3 months, and i really miss having that now that i’m out of school 😭 only 6 weeks??? that’s so short omg i’m so sorry ): do you have anything fun planned for your summer? also, do you have prom there? 💕

thank you soooo so much, sweetpea, you answered all of my questions so nicely, and i appreciate you so much 💝💝 ily too, and i hope you have a good week ahead, angel!!! 💖🌷

[ask-the-phan-site]

Phan Cam: First Day, First Year

REMINDER: Keep in mind that this takes place in a fictional version of the world where things are a little different, but some real-world problems do happen here. So please forgive us if this brings up any hurtful subjects.

NOTE OR WARNING: Tokyo University is very strange to the other admin who is an American and doesn’t understand it. Like there being more than one campus in the city or which teaches what. So we’re just going to make it up as we go. But you can give him more clear and simple information on our sister site. Also, this post may get a bit long.

>The University of Tokyo, Komaba Campus. Our first day of college at last. Partly because of the coronavirus, they started the year late.

Everyone, we have arrived.

You bet! Never thought I’d make it.

I know. You’re usually good at sports and music. And to get in on a music scholarship just for being an Idol, just make it amazing.

Skull: (a little offended) Hey, I resent that.

Either way, we’re here.

I know. We’re so happy. We can be together again.

Not all of us.

I know. I hope Futaba and Sumire are doing fine without us.

Joker: And I left Morgana with Boss. He hired him to work at the cafe.

>We hear a ring on our phones. We check them.

Good luck at college, you guys.

We’ll be rooting for you.

We know you can do it... Especially you, Lady Ann.🍀

Have fun studying!🏫

That’s so sweet of them.

We’ll have to thank them when we can.

I’m sure we will.

>We all were nearing the entrance when we were nearly hit by a van.

OH MY!

Hey, watch it, dip shit! You almost hit us!

>The car door opens.

Sorry about that. I guess somethings haven’t changed.

Urashima Sensei!?

Panther: You know this guys?

Queen: Yes. This is Keitaro Urashima, he’s an archaeologist here. He also  an assistant to Seta Sensei and substitutes for him in his class...

And seeing you here in Seta’s van means something is not right and your are substituting for him today.

Keitaro Urashima: Yeah, Seta’s being tested for the coronavirus today. I haven’t got any news yet, but until then, he asked me to fill in for his class.

Queen: I see. I wonder what if the rest of the faculty will be fine.

>Suddenly, a huge gust of wind blows. We’re nearly knocked down when we look up.

As I live and breathe.

>The woman in the blue coat and red hat came closer and closer down with her umbrella until she finally landed and closes it.

Woman with English Accent: (no picture at her request) You really should remember which side of the road they drive in Japan, Keitaro, you nearly ran over these students who are just hear for their first day. Mr. Amamiya, Mr. Sakamoto, Ms. Takamaki, Mr. Kitagawa, Ms. Nijima, Ms. Okumura, Detective Akechi, you need to be more aware of your surroundings despite standing in awe, you were lucky you heard the van coming otherwise you would have to spent the first day of the new year in the hospital which is already full at the moment. And Mr. Sakamoto, you really need to watch your mouth, there might be children nearby who may hear you.

>We all just stood there in silent about how a complete stranger knows our name.

Joker: You know who we are?

???: Of course she know. She’s Mary Poppins.

>We turn quickly to see Ryu and Wolf.

Crow: Oh, good morning, Ryu san, Zenckichi san.

Hello, all.

Good morning. You, too, Ms. Poppins.

Mary Poppins: Mary.

Wolf: Who else?

Mary Poppins: No. Mary Poppins. Never ever just Mary or Ms. Poppins.

Wolf: Forgive me.

Mary Poppins: It’s quite alright.

Keitaro Urashima: What brings you here? You know we’re in a state of emergency at the moment.

Mary Poppins: I can assure you that I have been thoroughly check. I am not carrying the coronavirus. However, the English Literature teacher, Mr. Dokusha, tested positive. Fortunately, it was a minor case and is expected to recover very soon. But in the meantime, I shall be substituting for him. But I am still first and foremost a nanny, so I’m only available certain days while also looking after children.

Queen: I see. But they does not explain why these two are here.

Ryu: You know which child she’s nannying? Kuri. I know Hase will be taking online classes this year, but with Inaba doing deliveries, he needs a little more help then the other tenants can offer.

Wolf: And I’m here to make sure things will be fine with Ms. Mary Poppins since she is English and the state of emergency has cautioned international travel.

Mary Poppins: I am very glad you are here for that. Thank you.

Wolf: You’re welcome.

Mary Poppins: Now, inside. The Dean is about to speak and we shouldn’t stand outside for too long. Spit Spot.

>We followed Mary Poppins inside while Ketaro goes to park the van.

>After a speech from the Dean gave a speech about how we have to stay strong in times like these (especially since more or less of the student body chose to study from home) and to make the most of it, we gathered together discuss the mysterious Mary Poppins..

Crow: I have heard her name a few time back at the apartment. I was told she stayed there a couple of times. I guess she just arrived to day...

By umbrella, no less.

Panther: I wonder what kind of teacher she’ll be like.

Fox: Me and Ren will find out soon enough, we have her first.

Skull: Wish we could join ya, but I’ve got my own class. (sad) Why’d it hafta be Math?

Panther: I have Acting Class.

Noir: I need to get to Agricultural Studies.

Queen: History of Law is up for me and Akechi.

Crow: Right, so we’ll see each other at lunch.

>We agree and go our separate ways.

>Fox and I arrive at our classroom. Not many student were there, but there were cameras and monitors for students studying from home. Me and Fox sit together (probably the only ones who are). Then, Mary Poppins comes.

Mary Poppins: Welcome, class. As the Dean had already announced, I will be teaching this class for a time. Now, for the book we will be starting with is one of my favorites: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Holmes has appeared a number of times in Sir Doyle’s works. There is even a museum dedicated to him on the real life 221B Baker Street in London, England. Of course, there have been a few times when when Holmes went on many cases and adventures with characters from other works. Such as Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, the dual-personality doctor of Robert Louis Stevenson, Count Dracula of Bram Stoker, and even, though it only in a video game... a famous thief. Does anyone here know who that thief is?

>I have a feeling she’s looking at me.

Mary Poppins: How about you, Mr. Amamiya? Do you know the famous thief of another work who went against Holmes?

>Carmen Sandiego >>Arsene Lupin >Lupin III >James Moriarty >The Phantom Thieves >Ishikawa Goemon

Mary Poppins: That is correct. You seem to know much about this gentleman thief.

You could say we have a... close connection.

Mary Poppins: Yes. I have a feeling as such. (she winks back)

>Fox and I just stare at each other for a moment in confusion.

Mary Poppins: Anyway, yes, Arsene Lupin, who was created by Maurice Leblanc, once went up against Sherlock Holmes. As for the rest of you, if you thought for a moment that it was James Moriarty, that is the wrong answer. Moriarty was also created by Sir Doyle as the nemesis of Holmes.

Male Masked Student: No way. He got it right.

Female Masked Student: It actually quite smart to know something like that. Maybe I should get his number.

He’s already taken.

Female Masked Student: (surprised) Really? The two of you are together?

Mary Poppins: If we can get back on subject. Now, I wish you all to write a short report about what you think of The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes. You have until the end of class. Don’t worry, those studying from home, we have a printer and you can email it to there. I will collect it from there.

>We spent the remainder of the class writing down our thought about Sherlock Holmes.

>The bell rang and it was time for our next class.

Fox: I’m afraid this is where we must part. I have Art Class next.

Joker: Archaeology for me.

Until we meet again, I will be thinking of you.

And I of you.

>We hug... and go to the wall-hanging hand sanitizers.

>I arrive at the front of the class room where Archaeology is taught. I was just about to enter when someone runs into me. We are both knocked down.

???? ????: OW! Sorry!

Joker: It’s okay. I should have been looking where I was going... Hold on.

>I pick him up. I look at his hair...

I recognize that hair anywhere. You’re him, aren’t you? ... The King of Games.

Yeah, I get that a lot.

Joker: I know. What are you doing here?

NOTE: We know that Yu-Gi-Oh!: The Dark Side of Dimensions was released some years this post, but for the sake of the Phan-sites’s storyline, we’ve changed a few things. Please forgive us if you don’t like it.

Yugi Muto: It’s my first year here at Tokyo U. I know I said I would work at my grandpa’s game store and create games of my own, but I thought I’d still go to college to improve those skills. And you... I know you. You’re friends with Ryuji Sakamoto of KUROFUNE. I saw you perform at the talent part of Dream FES.

Joker: Yes. Ren Amamiya, at your service, Yugi san.

Yugi Muto: You know, you can just call me Yugi.

>We both head inside. Just like in the last class, there were more or less people here while cameras and monitors helping us connect to students from their homes. Keitaro Urashima comes in.

Keitaro Urashima: Hey, everyone. I’m Keitaro Urashima. But, you can call me Keitaro if it makes you feel comfortable. Welcome to Archaeology. Here, we will learn about the ancient world. Now, according to Seta’s notes, we’re to start with the basics of the basics. First off, a short history of archaeology. Archaeology was first introduced in the 16th century Europe. They say that it first began when Nabonidus, the last king of the Neo-Babylonian Empire, became interested in the past so he could align himself with past glories. However, an early investigation of the past could be traced back to Ancient Greece... You, the one with the glasses next to the odd-hair young man.

>He’s talking to me.

Keitaro: Do you know the name of the Ancient Greek historian who had an interest in investigating the past?

>Socrates >Plato >>Herodotus >Homer

Keitaro: That’s right! You must have a real interest in this stuff, Amamiya kun. The Greek historian and scholar, Herodotus, was the first historian to collect his material systematically, test their accuracy, arranged them in a well-constructed narrative. Plato and his disciple, Socrates, were philosophers and Homer was an author who wrote the Odyssey. Herodotus was known as the “Father of History”.

Long Haired Girl in Mask: That’s amazing!

Masked Young Man with Piercing: I can’t believe he got it right.

As am I. You’re amazing

He always is.

Keitaro: Alright, alright, settle down now. By the way, Amamiya kun, who you all recognize from Dream FES’s Talent Show, isn’t the only celebrity here. We also have Hifumi Togo the Shogi champion, Yugi Muto the King of Games, and Rei Ryugazaki the top track runner and swimmer.

Rei Ryugazaki: I mostly do swimming these days.

>Did he really have to bring that up? Hifumi looks at me with contempt.

Yugi: Are you okay?

I’d rather not say.

Keitaro: Now, we will begin discussing about the earliest known archaeological digs.

>We spent the rest of the class learning about some of the early digs in archaeology.

>Beef Bowl Shop Ore no Beko. Normally, we would have lunch at our favorite diner, but they have closed due to it being too small to avoid infection and have switched to deliveries. This place, luckily, is still open, through they close early. Me, Fox, Skull, and Panther were discussing the classes we had. Skull was just in Math and Poetry and Panther had Acting and Science. Two others then come in. It was Yugi, Rei Ryugazaki, and a young man with thick blonde hair and an almost menacing face. I can only guess this is Katsuya Jonouchi... But for popular reasons and to make things more easier, we’ll call him by his western name: Joey Wheeler.

Yugi: Oh, Ren!

Joker: Hi, Yugi.

Panther: (confused) You know Yugi Muto and Rei Ryugazaki?

Yugi: We’re in Archaeology together.

Holy shit, you’ve even got Joey Wheeler here!

Ya seem surprised. Glad to meet a fan of mine.

Skull: Well, I mostly like Tea Gardner (Anzu Mazaki) since we’re both performers, but yer cool, Joey san.

Skull and Joey Wheeler: Ya better think twice before ya mess wit Joey Wheeler, da Godfada of Game!

Rei Ryugazaki: (irritated by that stunt) We thought we’d stop for lunch some. I guess you had the same idea.

Fox: We would normally go to the diner across the street, but due to the state of emergency, they can only deliver until they’re sure it is safe to reopen.

Skull: My mom said that they’ll reopen as soon as they make sure it’s safe. It’s always been one of our favorite hangouts.

Panther: I hope so. By the way, Ryuji, you’re mom’s a nurse, right? How are things with her?

Skull: Well, because of her job, she said I can’t stay in the apartment with her in case I get sick. Well, I was already movin’ out after graduation. I currently stayin’ with Akechi at his place ‘til I can find one of my own.

Rei Ryugazaki: Speaking of which, if you’re friends with the Detective Prince, isn’t he here?

Panther: He and our other friends have classes at the Hongo Campus. They’re having lunch elsewhere. But we’re suppose to meet up with them and our other friends from Shujin after classes.

Yugi: That’s good. I wish we could meet up with the others, too. But, they have their own paths to follow and we have to keep our distance.

>We all sat down and enjoyed our lunch.

Panther: That reminds me, if you’re here Rei san, does that mean the other members of your swim club is here?

REMINDER 2: We don’t know the exact timelines of most of the shows, cartoon, movies, video games, and anime. We’re just making it up as we go.

Rei: No. They are attending different colleges. I’m the only one who came to Tokyo University. Haru senpai’s at Hidaka University. Mako senpai’s at Meijo Chuo University here in Tokyo, I was hoping to visit him, but I can’t due to the lock down. Nagisa’s taking online courses because of the lock down as well. So is Gou.

Joker: Just have hope, Rei kun. You’ll see them again. I’m sure of it.

Rei: ... (smiling) You might be right. Thank you, Ren san.

Just promise the next time you guys so swimming, you’ll invite us.

>After we finished our lunch, we returned to the campus. My next class was Music with Skull. After that, my last class was Geography with Panther and Hifumi. Normally, college hours would last longer, but because of the state of emergency, classes end early each day

>Cafe Leblanc. Boss closed it early for us. We, including Wolf, talked about what happened today.

Sound like you guys had quite the day today. I can’t believe you actually eat lunch with the King of Games himself. I used to love to play Duel Monsters.

Same here. Me and Kasumi used to play together between recitals. Hey, Senpai, did you play Duel Monsters in the past?

Joker: I did. But I lost interest as I go older. But I might get back into it someday.

I have that feeling.

Queen: So, how was your day?

Oracle: Same as usual. Ms. Chouno was being saucy, Mr. Hiruta trying too hard to be charming... Mr. Ushimaru threw a piece of chalk at a student.

And you’ll never guess who it was and dodged it.

Joker: Who?

>The cafe door opens.

We’re closed.

??????: Aw c’mon, I thought this place was allowed to open again!

>We turn to see who was there.

You?

REMINDER 3: The other admin is still not a good artist. Sorry if the next few sprites look like they were made and don’t look good.

(removing his surgical mask) Surprised? I guess you never saw this coming.

Queen: (indeed surprised) You three are in Shujin Academy now?

Yeah. We would have told you, but we didn’t think we would go this year because of the pandemic.

But, I managed to talk them into it.

Bruno: (whisper) And by that, he means he annoyed us into it.

Makoto: (who heard that) Hey, I resent that!

Bruno: Just telling it as it is.

Boss: I see. Well, I suppose I can make some more curry. Don’t forget to wash up, first.

>We got our curry and my phone rings. I answer to see Sophie.

Good evening, everyone! How are you?

Oracle: Hi, Sophie!

Adi: Oh, you must be the AI the others talked about.

Sophie: Yes, my name is Sophia. But you can call me Sophie. I’m humanity’s best friend.

Bruno: That’s nice to hear.

Wolf: She helped us that team with EMMA.

Adi: I heard.

Makoto: Thanks for taking care of that Iron Man Wannabe. Even Tony doesn’t like him. He says he gives billionaire geniuses like him a bad rep.

Skull: Tell Stark you’re welcome. I just wish you guys coulda been there.

Bruno: We will.

Joker: So, you managed to dodge Mr. Ushimaru’s chalk? He used to do the same with me.

Adi: I did. I guess all that training I did with Hawkeye really paid off.

Bruno: I was there. I saw it. Me and Adi are in the same class.

Makoto: (disappointed) I wish I could have seen it. How could I end up a first year?

Bruno: Because you’re biologically 15 and 15-year-olds start in first year in Japan.

Personally, you still act like a kid.

Makoto: (irritated) What was that?

Are you threatening your senpai?

Makoto: (scared) Sorry, ma’am.

Queen: That reminds me, is Chloe also a student at Shujin.

Bruno: No, she’s chose to study at home. She was originally going to go to Coles Academic High School with Kamala, but due to COVID-19, they had to change their plans.

Panther: Yeah, she told me just before we left Eternia.

Wolf: I wish I could have gone. Maybe next time.

Adi: We can only hope this pandemic ends. At school, the place was almost empty.

Bruno: I know. I was worried when I saw this. I know I won’t be infected since I’m half machine, but Adi and Makoto aren’t.

Violet: Same here. I learned they canceled gymnastics today because one of the students tested positive.

Queen: I’m sorry to hear that.

Violet: It’s okay, he just has a minor case and is expected to recover in a couple of weeks.

Noir: That’s good to hear.

Joker: How’s Chloe, by the way? Knowing that she can’t go with Kamala, she must be very unhappy.

Makoto: Yeah, she’s pretty bummed out.

Adi: Unless Mr. and Mrs. Khan say it’s alright, they can only see each other on video chat.

Noir: I see. That must be hard on both of them. I just wish there was something that we can do.

>Noir’s right. I think for a moment... I got it!

I know what might help.

Adi: You do?

Joker: Before returning here, I got a message from Mishima. We just got a new request on the Phan-site. We may be leaving again soon.

Queen: Do we really have time for that? The school year just began.

Skull: I’m sure we’ll be back in time. Don’t worry.

Adi: I see. I guess I can ask her.

Makoto: Can the rest of us come, too?

Maybe next time. Right now, I think taking Lady Chloe with us might do her some good.

Bruno: I’m sure it will.

>The clock rings.

Wolf: It’s getting late and we’re all under curfew. We’ll talk more about it as soon as we can.

Adi: I’ll let Chloe know when we get back. See you all soon.

>With that, we separate for now.

>My room. I decided to get in some work-out time before going to bed.

Are you done up there, Ren? It’s rather lonely down here.

Joker: 98... 99... 100. That should do it.

Nice going, Joker!

>I get down from the beam, dry myself off, and change into my lounge clothes.

Nothing like pulling yourself up and down from an old wooden beam on the ceiling that looks like it could come down at any moment to get you ready for a good-night’s sleep.

Fox: Indeed.

>I get into the bed with Fox. Mona get on.

>After what happened with those pictures, we set a rule for Mona when Fox moved in: If Mona wants to sleep in the bed with us, he has to be in cat form unless we say it’s okay, otherwise he’ll have to sleep on the couch or in his cat house.

Mona: Can’t I sleep with you guys in human form tonight?

Joker: Not tonight. We’re pooped. Maybe another time.

Mona: Suit yourselves. Good night.

>I look over to Fox. I know it has already been some time since he moved into the attic with me and Mona, but still...

Fox: So here we are.

Joker: Our new lives together.

Fox: I know our love is not in the original game, it’s not even in Royal, but still, I’m so happy this fanmade timeline lets us be together.

Joker: Yeah, I wish ATLUS would have realized that a romantic route like this is okay. And there have been other fanmade timelines in which I’m with Ryuji, Akechi, or even Mishima. I was even told they showed us what Christmas is like. But right now, in this timeline...

I think I was born to meet you.

I am happy to hear that.

>We both share a passionate kiss. It is a really good feeling.

Fox: Good night, Ren. I love you.

Joker: Good night, Yusuke. I love you, too.

>I take off my glasses and we both fall gently asleep.

>We slept for some time...

>I open my eyes and I realize I”m not in my room anymore.

Welcome to the Velvet Room.

Joker: Lavenza? Why am I here?

Lavenza: I know about your newest heist. And this deals with some old friends of this room’s previous guests.

Yes, that would be the case.

Y- You... Aren’t you...

It appears we have surprised him, sisters.

Lavenza: Yes, you have already met my older brother, Theodore. But that is too long, so I ask that you call him Theo.

Theodore: Your name is as long as yours.

Woman in Blue: And we meet for the first time. My name is Margaret. I am Lavenza and Theodore’s older sister. We are denizens of the Velvet Room just as Lavenza is.

Joker: It’s nice to meet you. But what brings you here?

Margaret: We are here as Lavenza had said.

>Suddenly, a couple of cell doors open and someone comes in.

Ren?

Yu?

Narukami san? And Ren Amamiya san? If you are here... Mitsuru san was right. You are the leader of the Phantom Thieves of Hearts.

Joker: Pretty much.

Margaret: We have gathered you here because of that request.

Joker: You know who sent it?

Theodore: Indeed we do.

>Theodore opens the Compendium and shows us.

Yu: (reading it) The Clockwork God?

Aigis: (also reading it) The Clockwork God is the embodiment of death and one half of the deity, Chronos. That does sound familiar.

Margaret: It is... And here is why.

>Margaret turns the page.

Yu: ... Zen...

Aigis: And Rei san... How do we know those names? Have we met them somewhere before?

Yu: We must have. They’re wearing the Yasogami High School uniform. But I can’t seem to place them anywhere.

Margaret: Because you met them in a different Yasogami High School. You met them within a haven in the rift, a floating island adrift in the sea of the unconscious. When you left, Zen and Rei went to a new existence and your memories of your time together was gone. However, we in the Velvet Room remembered because it was recorded in the Compendium. And it appears the time has come to restore those memories.

Yu: You can do that?

Margaret: I cannot... But she can.

>The cell door opens again.

I think this is where I come in.

I know you. You’re Naminė.

Naminė: I’m glad you know who I am, Ren Amamiya. I’m here to restore the memories that were lost. I know my powers are normally limited to those who are connected to Sora, but thanks to everyone in the Velvet Room, I can do it with everyone as well. And it will only take a second. It sort of makes me wish I had this kind of assistance sooner.

>Naminė closes her eyes. In a flash, many things cam flowing into my head. None of it involved this Zen or Rei... But something else.

Yu: I... I remember! We met Zen and Rei in a different version of Yasogami. Rei was dead and Zen was suppose to take her to the afterlife. They got trapped and we helped them.

Aigis: I remember as well.

Naminė: Your friends have remembered as well. You might need their help.

Joker: I remember something. It’s not about your friends...

Something about... movies.

Aigis: I also remember that.

Yu: Me, too... But I think we should save that for another time. Right now, it sounds like Zen san and Rei chan are in trouble again. What happened to them?

Margaret: After our adventure with them, they went to a part of the Sea of Souls known as the Soul Society... But the rest you will have to hear from Rei.

Lavenza: It is time you return to your world and enjoy whatever rest you have.

Aigis: (smiling) I do not have to worry. As a machine, I do not require sleep. But, I should return and tell the Mitsuru san what has happened.

Maraget: And one more thing I must tell you. Naminė has restored all of your friends’ memories. This is because you may need their assistance. However, to avoid the place you are going to from also being effected by the changes bought on by the virus that now covers your world, you can only take one member of your team with you.

Yu: That’s true, we don’t want this place to have the coronavirus. Well, if I am going to have to take only one member of the Investigation Team, of course I’m going to choose Yosuke. He’s my partner. Always and forever.

Aigis: I do not wish the same thing, either. So, I suppose I shall bring Labrys, my sister. Since we are both machines and neither of us can get the virus, it should be fine.

Joker: I would like to bring someone, as well.

Theodore: Then it is settled.

Lavenza: The time as come.

>Everything went dark.

Now I bet you’re wondering where I was in all of this. Well, my parents insisted I take classes online to keep me from catching COVID-19 and stay safe. But, it’s not so bad. Think of it this way: This just means I can work on the Phan-site a little more...

So much for my Phantom Thieves documentary. It’ll have to wait.

But don’t worry. I'm not done yet. I hope you all still support the Phantom Thieves in all of this. I know I will. And as the admin of this site, you have my word.

Just leave it to me!

[cumberficsandmore-blog]

Spelling Fights

Word Count: 1,816

Authors: Deka & Ale

Warning: None, just fluffiness

Pairing: Benedict Cumberbatch x Wife!Reader

Summary: The little fight between an American and a British couple

Credits to this video for the awesome interview: https://youtu.be/eX2M6Lf8WKc

“So, the interview is tonight at eight, right?” I asked, standing behind the scenes of The Hobbit, Ben had just finished his scene as Smaug with the sensors and the tech stuff.

“Yes, but don’t get nervous. You’ll be fine” Benedict smirked, mocking me.

Oh, seriously Benny? He started the game, not knowing I was going to win again. This little game consisted in making fun of each other because of our nationalities, that cute british bastard.

“Of course I’ll be fine” I responded with my head high, I was too proud to quit now.

“But don’t forget that we’re in England. I’m worried people won’t understand what you’re saying, that’s all” He said.

“I can speak properly and I’m sure everyone will get my words, darling” I added with a british accent.

“But I can speak sexier” He winked at me.

“I’m afraid you don’t. ‘Football’, really? Soccer says almost everyone”.

“Everyone is only America? C’mon. At least I don’t say ‘math’, the right way to say it is Maths, you uncultured woman”

I was quiet for a moment, “FREEDOM” I shouted, and the fight began.

Two hours after the little chat with Benedict, we were at home having lunch before getting prepared for the interview. We looked at each other giggling, both of us knew what was going to happen, and we were prepared for the battle. At the beginning it all started as a joke, but now was a whole new rivalry. Ben was chosing a few cookies to eat and I was making some tea, it was a relaxing silence but then my dear husband started screaming.

“That is not how you make tea!” He cried out trying to sound attacked.

“Oh my God, are you serious? We’re not having that conversation again. I highly recommend you to leave the kitchen or…”.

He kissed my cheek interrupting and I smiled wildly.

“I love you, you know that? But maybe we should change tasks. Let me take care of this and you pick the cookies. Deal?”.

I sighed dramatically.

“Yes, we better”.

“Yeah, you can’t just squish the tea bag with the spoon. That’s wrong, love”

“Sorry Mr. Britishguy Sillyname”

He laughed and so did I.

Now we were waiting for someone to tell us to enter the room where the interview was held, everyone took turns, first was Richard Armitage, then Martin and Benedict and I were the last ones. As an actress I was in a lot of movies with Ben. Directors and writers had told us that we have an unique chemistry, but I didn’t appear in The Hobbit trilogy. I joined the crew as a make-up artist and helped with the script, as a big fan of Tolkien I couldn’t miss that opportunity for anything in the world.

“They’re taking a lot of time, aren’t they?” Benedict said, I couldn’t tell if he was worried or excited.

“Is there anything you know about this interview that I don’t?” I asked calmly, “you’re into something, right?”

“Me? Nah. Oh, wait, do you smell that?”.

“Smell what?”.

“Fear”.

I rolled my eyes.

“Okay Smaug the Almighty Destructor of Villages, what have you done?”

“Nothing, I swear!”

He stroked gently my waist.

“Mr. and Mrs Cumberbatch, it’s your turn” announced a blonde woman who happened to be the interviewer.

Before doing so we greeted Martin and talked with him a few seconds. Then, Benedict held the door for me to walk in, so british of him. The purest gentleman.

“Good evening, and thanks a lot for attending me, it’s an honor to have you both here”.

I smiled at her and he shaked her hand.

“My name is Meriah Doty. So, firstly, how are you today?”.

“Great, yeah. Great indeed, although it’s brass monkeys out there”.

Damn.

“It means it’s cold outside” He whispered.

I could see in his smiley face he was forcing himself not to laugh.

“You don’t say!” I answered sarcastically.

Meriah cleared her throat and started to ask Benedict some questions fans sent her via Twitter and Facebook. I was getting a bit bored but then an interesting question popped up.

“So, @CumbercookieLove34 asked: how is it to work with your wife? Is it any competition between you two?”

I crossed my arms, paying full attention now.

“Competition?”.

He pretended to be searching for an answer.

“I wouldn’t name it a competition, but he’s always insulting me. Not in a bad way, you know? But… he’s very silly most of the time, ‘cause I’m the only American in the crew, with Lee Pace of course, but he’s as glorious as Thranduil so Benedict kind of forgives him somehow” I said suddenly.

“The thing is,” Ben started, ”she can’t manage my britishness and she’s mad because she only speaks a simplified version of English” he played the victim.

“Watch your mouth Buttercup Cumberpatch” and I rolled my eyes for what seemed the 10000th time. Meriah laughed again, ”See?” I turned around to face her, “I’m so tired”.

Ben patted my back and gave me that Puppy Eye’s Look, he really knows how to do that look and make you feel guilty.

“You can’t really imagine how is living with him. Complains about the tea and when I send him a text sometimes I spell words with only an ‘O’ instead of ‘OU’ and it drives him crazy, for instance, but he truly does everything he can just to irritate me” I said releasing a sigh. Meriah laughed again, really this girl is just supposed to laugh? “But then he’s a complete sweetheart and his polite self takes control so he says sorry all the time” I chuckled.

Benedict laughs uncontrollably.

“But hey, we love each other after all, so don’t worry, we’re gonna stick together until the end” I said looking straight to the camera.

“‘Gonna’” He repeated.

“Yep” I stated marking the ‘p’.

“Well, you guys are definitely the cutest couple of all time. We’re playing a game now. I searched photos of the cast and you’re going to guess who are they just by looking at their feet” The interviewer said excitedly.

“This is gonna be so much fun” I said already laughing, oh my God, I turned into Meriah.

“So, this is the first one” she showed us a picture of a person with his face and body covered.

“Ugh, whoever that is they got some weird looking feet” I commented.

“Martin Freeman” Benedict said without thinking twice. The interviewer giggled.

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, how could you… how ca… Wait what? Do you have a foot fetish for Martin? Oh my God I knew it!” I fangirled in front of camera, “just so you know, people…” (I paused to create a little of dramatism) “I ship Johnlock”.

Both Benedict and Meriah laughed so hard that I swear I heard a snort.

“That’s actually quite right. I took her to the Sherlock Set once and every time we finished a scene with strong content, like the one in the pool or when I jumped… well, you know, spoilers. The point is that she always clapped and hugged Martin and I, and I remember perfectly she said ‘You two are so shippable’. Oh, was that too long? I’m sorry I just wanted to tell the story” He giggled shyly while blushing.

“Oh, and by the way, sorry Martin, you have wonderful feet” I smiled.

“You two are so cute, guys” Meriah complimented. “So, the second one is… this!” She showed us another picture.

“Mmm… James Nesbitt?” I guessed.

“Peter Jackson” Benedict said. No hesitation.

“Yeah! Point for Benedict!” Meriah told us.

“What?! I swear this guy has a foot fetish” I tried to mask my bad loser mood.

“I’m so good at this” He said proudly.

“Okay, so this one is a bit difficult but the black and white is the key” The interviewer said revealing the photo.

It was pretty obvious that it was taken a lot of years ago.

“Mmm...”

“Richard?” Ben inquired.

“Ian McKellen!” I literally shouted, I was sure it was him.

“Correct! You’re good Y/N” Meriah greeted me.

“In your face Buttercup!” I did a short but intense party dance in the chair, “I guessed it and you didn’t!” Ben just watched me as he smiled sweetly. “Maybe the feet are overexposed”

“Yeah, I don’t know why Ian McKellen’s feet are overexposed” He said in his Sherlock kind of voice, “that was rude…”

The three of us laughed.

“The next one,” Meriah said “is this one!” She showed us a photo of two people jumping in the air.

“Mmmm…” I started thinking, “one is Benedict, I know it, but the oth…”

“Me and Jonny Lee Miller” He said quickly, “Jonny Lee Miller and I” He corrected himself.

“Amazing! And Martin Freeman corrected me because his face was plastered in Johnny Lee Miller’s…, my bad” Meriah said.

“Yeah, that’s bullshit. Who did that?” He went to grab the photo.

“I thought it was him, I found it like that on the internet” She explained. “Okay, next and last one”.

“Oh Lord” I exclaimed. Benedict stretched out in his chair and approached the lady with the photograph.

“Richard… Armitage?” He wondered, confused.

“I… don’t know…  Stephen Hunter?”

The interviewer showed us the whole picture.

“Evangeline, oh my God” Benedict covered his mouth, surprised, “Oh my God” He laughed really hard, “Fuck” He kept laughing, covering his eyes with the palm of the hand.

“Well, that" I pointed at him with my finger ”is definitely rude”

I was super tired so I decided to sit in the back of the car so I could lay down and fall asleep more easily, but instead of that, I was staring at Benedict’s side profile.

“You’re beautiful” he declared suddenly.

He kept his eyes on the road but I noticed he was grinning.

“You are beautiful too, and I love your accent” I said sternly and he smiled sweetly, “and I also love your otter face”

He tried not to laugh too much so he couldn’t get distracted.

“You have the otter face… otter face.” He tried to make a good insult and failed.

“You sure it’s me who has that face? Your cumberbitches and probably the rest of the multiverse says it’s you who owns that title, my love”

“It’s cumbercollective” He sighed and rolled his eyes, copying me.

“We all know it is and will always be cumberbitches, get over it Buttercup”

“Not gonna happen”.

“Gonna? It seems like I’m who rules the relationship”.

“You’ve always ruled the relationship”

“I’m glad you’re day by day recognizing facts. Today’s been ‘gonna’, I’m curious about what’s gonna “I laughed hard when I said that” be tomorrow”.

“Oh, shut up”

That night, as we did since the very first time we shared a bed, we slept cuddling, then in the morning our innocent little verbal war continued.

[kittymonks-fanfiction]

Genderswapped Nations Review - Chapter 2

Hello all, welcome back to Genderswapped Nations! Last time, we found an American girl named Ariana being kidnapped by Prussia and dragged to Germany against her will amongst a bunch of other American girls because Prussia thinks they’re the female versions of the personifications of entire countries and wants to lure said countries to Germany for whatever reason. Now for chapter 2, when things get interesting.

..And yes, I’m aware that it is both a Friday and a few months after I launched this blog. I’m a fuckup. 

Chapter 2: Conversation and Costumes

In the long scheme of things this title isn’t horrendous, but it’s still not good. Every chapter has conversations, so the only relevant word to the plot of the chapter is ‘costumes’.

…and unfortunately, that’s also one of the worst parts of this chapter.

The door to Ariana’s room opened, revealing one living room with the other eight gender swapped nations sitting on four sofas.

TITLE DROP!

Ariana sat on the sofa with Louella and Kierra. However, when Ariana sat down, Louella stood. She walked to the center of the living room.

Wow, that’s cold.

“Girls, let us first silently thank that Prussia guy for letting us have one hour to converse amongst ourselves.” She said.

1; you’re not really thanking him ‘silently’ if you’re thanking him out loud. 2; how do you know that you’ll be able to talk to one another for an hour? Who told you this information and didn’t tell the others?

Ariana noticed that Louella was gaining a German accent, like she had begun to develop an English accent and see a flying green bunny everywhere.

What the hell? Are they just shapeshifting into miniature versions of their counterparts through magic? Did Ariana magically inherit the same hallucinations as England somehow?

“Anyway, this is about what to call each other. Everyone knows what nation they are the gender swap of, correct?”

All of the girls nodded. “Anyway,” Louella continued. “We will now refer to ourselves and each other as our male counterpart countries. For example, my name is now Germany.”

“No, Louella!” Felicity whined. “Your name is so pretty, don’t replace it!”

“Now Italy…” Louella began. “We need to act like our counterparts more. Don’t argue, just do it!”

Okay, this is ridiculous. They haven’t even met their counterparts, don’t even know if they really exist, and yet Louella is totally set on pretending to be them for some reason. They aren’t actual nations, they’re just a bunch of kids! Even the nations get ‘human’ names when they aren’t personifi-nations, so if these kids aren’t nations, why are they insistent on calling themselves by nation names?

By the way, hey guys, some German extremist kidnapper told me that I’m the female version of the male-gendered personification of the Shenandoah River. Don’t call me Kitty anymore. Call me Shenandoah River. I know that’s stupid because male!Shenandoah River, who is the actual Shenandoah River that has been around since it was carved by the glaciers that cut across North America millions of years ago, is a good friend of ours, but trust me on this. That guy who was cackling like a supervillain and doesn’t seem to have a real plan is just really convincing for some reason.

“Why do we have to listen to you, Louella?” Ariana asked curtly.

“Because I heard Germany leads the meetings with the nations,” Louella said smugly.

In the first episode of the anime and Paint it White, maybe, but not in real life politics—and probably not in the canon of Hetalia, either.

“But you aren’t Germany!” Ariana said. “None of us are supposed to be the nations they already exist! We don’t need to copy them!”

“Is that right, England? Because you’re attitude is almost a mirror image to the real guy,” Louella noted.

How does Louella know this? And never mind that, this is just like Prussia labeling her as the literal embodiment of the UK in the last chapter because she said she liked tea, only here it’s because Ariana is complaining and England is known to complain. Everyone complains! I’m complaining right now!

In fact, get in touch with Shenandoah River--he’s just as much as a whiner. I mean, he complains about the amount of E. coli that’s been getting into his water, but hey, I’m complaining about shit too.

Ariana realized that Louella was right. It must have been the room!

…Heh?

It was the room she was in that was leading her to act and sound like Britain, and made Louella feel like the boss of everyone else and want to change everyone’s names!

What?

Louella’s probably more like Germany than I am to England, she thought, because that Prussia guy noticed Louella’s tough spirit in that throne room, and must have somehow made her turn into her counterpart faster.

Sudden confusing change in narrative, and…Say again?

Felicity was acting exactly like Italy, and knowing Prussia’s image of Italy, her room was on low.

Well that doesn’t make things any better. That’s just mean.

So to get things straight, these rooms are decked out with a lot of stuff that’s meant to brainwash these kids into acting like they’re from particular nationalities so that they’ll better fit Prussia’s image for them so he can lure the other countries to Germany for some unknown reason? And these rooms have ‘knobs’ or something that can be used to set a room ‘on low’ if wanted? If Germany has that sort of technology , then someone should be raising some red flags! That’s a major human rights violation, I’d think.

But really, that’s just about the stupidest thing I’ve heard all day.  

Alexis got up, and headed for a door.

Just a door. She doesn’t know which one. She could be walking into a screaming metal death trap as far as she knows.

“America, where do you think you’re going?” Louella questioned.

“I have to find the restroom,” Alexis said.

It’s been how long and nobody’s had to use the bathroom yet? That’s not at all realistic. Somebody would be crying and complaining right now if this was a real kidnapping situation.

“And my name is not America! I’m Canada!”

“Whatever you say, Canadia.” Louella said, before continuing to talk to the other gender swaps.

Alexis’s learned helplessness is real. Louella told them to start calling themselves and each other by their nation names and Alexis is the only person who went along with it. Not to mention the return of that stupid joke that probably only came up in the English dub of the anime once.

ALEXIS ABUSE +2

Alexis exited a random door from the eleven doors in the previous room.

Honey, you could be walking right into your death right now. You’ve been kidnapped by a probably-deranged person alongside a bunch of other little girls who are all getting stupid accents for some reason. What if you walked in on something you weren’t supposed to see?

But instead of a restroom, she found herself behind Prussia’s throne in the throne room. Prussia was talking to one of the black-clothes men when Alexis opened the door.

Like that! But why does Prussia randomly have a door leading from his ‘throne room’ (who the hell has a throne room just in their house) to a living room surrounded by eleven bedrooms? Why did he leave it unlocked? Prussia, one of those girls—probably your brother’s counterpart, if I had to wager a guess—could have hacked off the leg of a couch and used it to smash you in the head, allowing for an easy escape while you’re unconscious. Did you really not think this through?

“I’m not going to keep those girls for that long,” Prussia said. “I’m going to kick most of them out sometime tomorrow.”

If the nations aren’t already coming from Berlin, then how do you expect a bunch of people to get to Germany from all over the globe, including from North America and Asia, within a day?

Is this meant to suggest that he doesn’t want the nations to show up and get their gender swaps? Does he just want to troll everyone by leading them on to believe that they have gender swaps by brainwashing a bunch of girls and letting them out afterwards so they’ll never get to meet them?

You’re walking on thin ice, man! It’s a miracle that you haven’t disappeared over all these years, don’t push your luck by trying to get yourself killed!!

“What do you mean by ‘most of them’?” The black clothed man asked.

“I’m going to keep around only the gender swaps of the nations that would get the most pissed if I did that,” Prussia said. “I’m just going to keep the German one and maybe America’s and England’s gender swaps.”

He literally wants to die right now. He wants the other nations to kill him. He doesn’t want to be the one to off himself, so he’s goading all of the other nations on so they’ll kill him and he can basically commit suicide by cop. Jiminy Cricket, this got dark fast.

“And you’re just going to send all the rest of them out into the cold?” The black clothed man asked.

“What else would I do with them?” Prussia questioned.

What the fuck time of year is it? It’s cool enough that Ariana can hang around outside with earbuds in without freezing to death in America, but apparently it’s cold and snowy in Germany?

“You could put them up for sale on the internet,” the black clothed man suggested.

“Nah, do you know how often America is on the internet? He’d bid on them in a second.” Prussia said, sounding somewhat bored.

America specifically? What about Sweden? Considering that he bought Sealand off of the internet (which is probably what this is a reference to), it’s far more likely (and far more canonical) that he would take notice rather than America. I mean, America should be hot on your tail because you kidnapped nine American citizens and brainwashed them, but apparently in this wild storyline he’s not.

Not to mention all of the continued child trafficking implications that come with the suggestion of selling little girls on the internet.

“So, let me get this straight; you’re going to be sending six kids into other countries and expect for them not to be found?” the man asked.

Alright, who the heck is this guy? I love him. I want to give him a commendation for pigeonholing Prussia’s entire plan for me.

“Now that I think of it, it would be a very bad idea to just send off those children and let them be other countries’ slaves.

Past me, what year do you think it is? Illegal immigrants into other countries aren’t taken as slaves, especially if they’re little girls! Do I have to mention human trafficking again?

And I don’t think they would last more than a second if they wandered into Switzerland’s place!” Prussia exclaimed.

Because Switzerland is well known for shooting little girls who wander into Switzerland? Geneva Convention? That sketch in the anime about Italy being shot at for wandering into Switzerland’s yard was a joke about Switzerland shooting down planes flying in its airfield during World War II because of its neutrality. Since WWII is over, he’d have no reason to shoot everyone who comes into his yard!

You’ll see a continued series of mistakes that occurred because I didn’t know anything about history before watching this anime and took events/interactions literally instead of figuratively, often resulting in events that took place in the past (when the anime is primarily set) taking place--or continuing to take place--in the present (2012, that is--when this story is supposed to be set).

“But, it would send the other countries into madness if something bad were to happen to their gender swaps… Still going with my plan.” With that, Prussia stood up, and left the throne room through a different door than the one Alexis was behind.

So he literally is just trying to troll all of the countries and make them want to kick his ass? I can see him being a troll, but I can’t see him trying to make a bunch of other nations—most of them being his friends—want to wage war against him for no reason other than him, presumably, being bored.

Alexis gasped, and closed the door. She entered the living room area again, to see Louella speaking about what she believed would happen when they were released. “We should all stick together if our counterparts decide not to bother picking us up,” Louella said. “And just try to reach an airport and get to our respective countries.”

You mean the United States? Because that’s where you’re all from. You can speak with accents and call yourself by nation names all you want, but that’s still where your parents and your citizenship remains. You don’t even have passports with which to travel to other countries! It would be much easier to go to Interpol instead. And how do you mean to pay for all of those plane tickets across the world? With USD you may or may not have? You’re in Germany!

Ariana noticed Alexis enter again.

This is a relatively rare occurrence, only happening now because Ariana is a Mary-Sue starting after the first chapter. Yeah, you didn’t think it could get worse from there? It has.

“I have something to say, everyone,” Alexis began. But just as she was about to tell the rest of the gender swaps, Prussia entered.

“Get into your rooms now.” Prussia said simply. All of the girls left into their rooms, and Prussia exited again.

That was so curt and sudden and ridiculous that it’s almost hilarious. It’s like Prussia knew that Alexis was about to tell them something important because the fourth wall told him so he popped in specifically to make her stop it. And everyone just went along with his demand even though they had no real reason to do so.

Later, the original England got on an airplane, along with all of the other countries with discovered counterparts.

Okay, so they weren’t in Berlin earlier. In that case, where were they? Were they at the UN headquarters in New York or something? If that’s the case, then why didn’t America mention the fact that American citizens were kidnapped by German extremists?!

England had to sit beside France on the plane, so of course England had nothing to do.

“I bet your counterpart is very dumb,” France said when he noticed how angry England was because he had to sit beside him.

“I bet yours has a beard,” England said.

Boys, how old are you? Those are obviously insults written by a twelve-year-old me, not to mention that they’re totally random and stupid. Neither had really any prompting to insult the other and doing so is only going to make the flight more uncomfortable for both of them.

France growled, and the speakers in the plane boomed. “This will be a day long flight. Passengers, please fasten your seatbelts. Get ready for takeoff.” The place then ascended into the air (With a frightened Italy and annoyed Germany on board), on its way to pick up the counterparts.

On its way to re-kidnap kidnapped girls.

Ariana fell asleep that night, woke up and saw an odd figure looming over her bed. Ariana didn’t know who or what it was, but certainly hoped it wasn’t Iscah.

Oh yeah, she exists and I guess everyone is now afraid of her even though she hasn’t said a single word since she was introduced last chapter (no really, go look! She’s been mute this entire time). But why would she assume it was one of the other girls? The door is locked so no one can get in or out without, presumably, a key. Even if they could somehow get out of their rooms, it’s impossible to think they could have gotten into Ariana’s. 

But the English counterpart turned on the lights to Francisca. Ariana screamed. “Francisca, what are you doing in my room?” she asked franticly.

Oh, I guess she was right to suspect one of the other girls. But still, how did Francisca get in? She would have had to phase through the door like some kind of specter.

In a full-blown French accent,

As opposed to a half-blown French accent I guess,

Francisca replied, “I just got the sudden urge to stalk you. I don’t know why.” She then chuckled exactly like France.

I’m sorry, what? That’s not normal for any person to say or do! That’s not even something France would do in canon! What the fuck?

“How did you even get in here?” Ariana asked.

“When Prussia dismissed us to our rooms, I hid under a couch until everyone was gone, and when you were napping, I snuck underneath your bed.” Francisca said with a sly smile.

That’s ridiculous! If the doors are all locked—presumably using an automatic lock system or keys—then how would Francisca get into Ariana’s room by locking herself out of her own room and then going into Ariana’s? If Prussia’s lock system could so easily be thwarted by a thirteen year old, then what’s the point of it?

“So, now what?” Ariana asked after a short span of awkward silence.

“I don’t know, what would France do about now?” Francisca questioned.

I don’t know, fuck off? You scared and humiliated your rival, now leave and stop creeping around like some weirdo.

…and if you couldn’t tell from this entire situation, younger me really didn’t like France. She thought he was a weirdo. I mean, he’s not a saint, but at least he doesn’t do this.

“Does that even matter?” Ariana asked.

An ominous voice from Ariana’s closet said, “I know what France would do…”

What is that meant to imply? It had better goddamn not be what I think it is, past me. I will knock you into this Tuesday.

“Iscah, get out here!” Ariana shouted.

Iscah exited the closet,

Insert a joke here.

and walked over to Ariana, who just got out of bed. “And what where you doing in here, Iscah?” Ariana asked.

Iscah’s face turned ominous as she said, “You would be freaked out if I told you.”

What, were you going to murder her? Or were you just intending to scare her further?

“I’m already freaked out! I’m just glad Francisca woke me up before you could do anything to me,” Ariana said.

“I wasn’t planning to wake you up,” Francisca said.

“You were just going to let Iscah do whatever she was planning to do to me?” Ariana asked.

“Pretty much,” Francisca said, nodding.

Oh my god, she is. Past me was implying rape. What. The. Fuck.

I WAS TWELVE WHEN I WROTE THIS.

“So I can go to sleep sane,” Ariana said. “Anyone else in my room?”

Allison stepped out from the closet.

Insert a joke but with more USUK shipteasing here.

“And why are you here?” Ariana asked.

“Iscah was in my room, and she was creeping me out way too much.” Allison said with a frightened face as Iscah looked to her with the ominous face.

“So, you decided to come into my room, hide in the closet, and then wait there until morning?” Ariana asked.

“Well, yeah.” Allison said, sounding very dim-witted.

“the ominous face”

No but seriously, if Allison was running away from Iscah, then why would she enter Ariana’s closet along with Iscah and chill out in there until Ariana told her to come out?

“Will everybody just get out of here?” Ariana questioned.

Allison walked to the door, and tried to open it. “Nope, we’re locked in.”

Well no shit! What did you expect? It’s a miracle that you managed to glitch through your door to get here in the first place, Allison! You didn’t hide in the living room to access Ariana’s room (which apparently works, according to Francisca), so your escape doesn’t make any sense. But really, if all of these girls could just leave their rooms anyway, why don’t they ollie out of Prussia’s lair and get the police before any more shenanigans can happen?

Ariana screamed in a very ghastly manner, because now she had to share a room with Francisca and Iscah, and only Iscah because Allison had led her in here.

“But why would you sneak in here and not Felicity’s room? She wouldn’t have woken up.” Ariana said.

Uhh, wow, thanks for throwing Felicity under the bus for no reason Ariana. What did she ever do to you to warrant you calling her stupid earlier and trying to have her room invaded now??

“She wasn’t there.” Allison said.

And shame on you for having the same idea!!

Just then, the Italy counterpart stuck her head out from under Ariana’s bed. “Hello, everybody!” she said in a cheerful matter before receding back under the bad after seeing all of the other counterparts staring at her. “Goodbye!” she said as she went back under the bed.

See? Look how precious she is! Never mind that she has no reason to be in here right now, she didn’t do anything to deserve such horrible treatment from her new friends!

Ariana had a creeped out face that she then replaced with uneasy smile. “Iscah and Francisca, would you go into the closet?”

Both of the two counterparts went into the closet,

Um…why? Isn’t Francisca freaked out by Iscah as well? What reason would there be for them to go in there together? They’re not being forced and, if Iscah is supposed to be a carbon clone of Russia, then she shouldn’t appreciate being bossed around by someone ‘weak’ like Ariana.

and Ariana covered the door with the desk and chair in her room so they wouldn’t be able to do anything to her during the night.

And yet she doesn’t do this to Allison because…she’s not as creepy? Plot twist; she was actually the one who showed up to draw dicks on Ariana’s face while she was asleep. The others just have really crappy motives (especially Felicity, who has no motive).

“Now no one else wants to hang out with Iscah and Francisca in that closet, correct?” Ariana asked the other counterparts in an eerie manner. When all of thee counterparts

Three? But Felicity and Allison are the only ones not in the closet right now. Are there any other Squidwards I should know about??

slowly shook their heads, Ariana flopped back into bed and fell asleep.

Luckily for her, this encounter with ‘dangerous’ people didn’t make her any less apt to go to sleep. But is threatening Allison and Felicity really necessary? Allison was trying to get away from Iscah in the first place and is probably muttering Catholic prayers and backing away from the closet right now and I’ll be damned if Felicity is going to try any weird shit in the middle of the night. The worst I can see her doing is crawling into or onto Ariana’s bed because she got scared.

While she was sleeping, Francisca began to wail from the closet. If Ariana was awake, she’s be thinking “Only God knows what terrible things Iscah’s doing in there.”

This statement is a mess not just because of the diction and grammar, but because of the implied violence/adolescent rape. Seriously, what was my fascination with rape all about?

But I have to wonder, if the other swaps sleep in Ariana’s brainwashing room, will they all become British too? That’s how the rooms are said to work, so did they just…suddenly stop working alongside the locks on all of the doors?

The next morning, the nation’s airplane landed, and the nations left the plane after grabbing their luggage.

They’re just planning on picking up a bunch of girls, aren’t they? How much luggage do they need?

All of the countries had a good idea about what their counterpart looked like, except Italy, who just imagined Chibitalia.

I can’t tell if this is a dig at Italy for being stupid or a dig at the others for thinking that their counterparts would look like them with long hair (if even that) and boobs.

“Where are we supposed to go?” Italy asked Germany.

“Well, I guess to Prussia’s ouse,” Germany replied.

You mean…your house, right? You do know where your own house is, don’t you? Considering that you took a plane to get to your own country, I’m not too sure.

“I’ll lead everyone there!” America volunteered.

“You’d just get us lost,” England sneered.

“Yes, and Germany should know the way better than anybody.” Japan said.

Yes, because—again—it’s HIS HOUSE.

America pouted as Germany led them to Prussia’s house (Which was relatively close, but caused America to exclaim “Dude, It was that way?”)

“Dude, I’m a Flanderized character!?”

On that same morning at the same time,

Um…didn’t want to opt for the ‘Meanwhile’, past me?

Ariana woke up. She noticed Allison, who was sleeping on the floor with a blanket,

A blanket from hammerspace, I presume.

had glasses on. “That’s weird, Allison wasn’t wearing glasses last night,” Ariana thought.

Probably because Nyotalia America doesn’t need glasses.

“And why am I so hot?”

Wow that’s an uncharacteristically haughty thing to say Ariana watch your ego!!!

She stepped out of bed, and noticed that she was wearing the same uniform as England casually wore, but the shirt part was a dress, and had a black ribbon instead of a tie.

“Whaaa?” Ariana questioned loudly enough to wake Felicity and Allison.

“WAAAA” for Waluigi is right. A shirt dress? Why not just give her a feminized version of England’s uniform instead if you really want to rip off the originals’ style? Like, the jacket’s the same but the pants are a skirt instead. Shirt dresses should only be worn to bed.

“What’s going on?” Allison asked, reaching to rub her eyes but rubbing her glasses instead. “And what happened to my eye?”

“You have glasses on, you moron.” Ariana answered plainly.

Hey, that’s an understandable mistake to make. People don’t usually sleep with glasses on their face, and when they do, they usually fall off. Allison has every reason to wonder if there’s something wrong with her eyes. They must be deceiving her because something impossible in real life just happened.

“I do?” Allison said. She got up, and walked to the mirror present in Ariana’s room. Allison gasped when she noticed her now smudged glasses and shirt dress and brown ribbon. “Dude,” she said, dumbfounded.

So…Everyone has a shirt dress? Eww. Past me needs to learn about style. I mean, have you seen the canon Nyotalia designs? They’re adorable. I’m in love with half of those girls. Maybe not America so much, but the others are great. So why disregard those designs in favor of these ugly ones?

All of the girls discovered they wore the same shirt dresses and ribbons, except Iscah, who just wore Russia’s outfit with tights instead of pants.

Actually, that outfit sounds kind of cute. Commendations in that regard.

When the time came for the conversation hour, all of the girls were blaming each other for their new, and rather uncomfortable and unstylish, costumes.

Why would they immediately blame each other and not Prussia or his mysterious ‘black-clothes men’?

But Felicity didn’t seem to mid hers a bit, and neither did Iscah or Francisca.

“Silence!” Louella shouted.

No but seriously, a thirteen year old girl has no reason to speak like this.

“We don’t need to blame each other, because it was me!”

“What?” Ariana asked.

‘What’ is right! How did Louella manage to sew all of these designs (somehow knowing what their counterparts wore), leave her room, enter the rooms of the other swaps, undress them, and redress them without anyone waking up and noticing? And how did she know that Francisca and Iscah were in Ariana’s closet, Allison was on Ariana’s floor, and Felicity was under the bed and account for that without waking anybody up?

“I don’t even need glasses!” Allison shouted. She threw the glasses off of her face, and began to walk around. “See, those were use-“she was cut off when she tripped over a couch and fell right beside her glasses. She put them on again.

…So she threw her glasses onto the ground—presumably at her feet–, walked forward, tripped over a large couch, and somehow landed back where she’d discarded her glasses so she could put them on again? Never mind the fact that tripping over a couch is impossible, that thing with the glasses had to involve some sort of teleportation.

I know that I meant to say that she ‘tripped over the couch’s leg/foot’ rather than ‘she tripped over a couch’ , but that’s how the finished product was released so that’s what I’m reviewing. And now we have a mental image of an Allison GMOD model flying into the air, flipping over a couch, and landing face first into the floor.

“I like it,” Francisca said.

“Shut it, Francisca,” Ariana said.

Just what this fic needed—more pointless conflict!

“I spent all day yesterday designing these, stop complaining!” Louella said. “I thought our counterparts would want us more if we resembled them even more.”

I’m sorry, what? Why is Louella so determined to go along with these people Prussia says is coming to get them? What is she running away from?

And…she does know that their counterparts can’t see them right now, right? So what’s the purpose in dressing like idiots in the meantime?

“We were fine without these outfits!” Yiesha shouted, sending the group once again into chaos. The girls were quieted when the chime of a doorbell rang throughout the room.

“Who is it?” Kierra questioned.

“It’s Himaruya, here to save everyone with the canon and erase all of the out of place references to rape”

“I’ll look out the window in Francisca’s room. It has a view right above the door.” Ariana said, walking into the French counterpart’s room.

Uhhh, I’m sorry?? First of all, how did Ariana know this? Second, if there’s a straight-up WINDOW in one of the rooms, why don’t they just leave out of the window and go to the police??

She glanced out of the window, and gasped. She ran back into the room with the other girls. “You won’t believe this!” she exclaimed. “It’s them! They’re here!”

But will they want their gender swaps if it turns out that they’re all clairvoyant teenagers cosplaying as badly-designed female counterparts??

It seems like it’s over now, doesn’t it? You just wait… (Creepy Iscah face)

Oh yes, that…well-known creepy Iscah face. You mean ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)?

Anyway, that was chapter 2 and BOY HOWDY was that an experience. It’s only getting worse since the first chapter and I promise, it only gets more convoluted and stupid from here on out. Come back next time for some crappy spy work, sick burns, and really, really flawed logic.

(CANADA/ALEXIS ABUSE COUNTER: 3)