xuezhen-liu

[sameschmidtdiffname]

Sweet Delights

Peeta Mellark x AFAB!Reader

Summery: It's a slow work day in District 12. With rain pouring down outside, who can blame you for wanting to indulge a little? Everything's fine so long as no one walks in... right?

Tags: Pre-established relationship, no use of y/n, pet names, reader has AFAB body/female pronouns, switch!Peeta, switch!Reader, edging, female fingering, teasing, count down, orgasm denial, blow job, face fucking, public sex, someone walks in, dirty talk, Peeta's a freak but he's sweet about it, praise kink if you squint, mentions of eating out, cum swallowing, cursing, post-Mockingjay but that's not really relevant, no reader orgasm this time around. Once again, I'm probably forgetting something.

Notes: I have to say, I did not expect Peeta to win the poll! And not to worry for everyone else, I'll get to all those characters eventually. (Derek girlies, I see you and I love you.) Thank you for your support on the last one, I hope you like this one too! Bon ABBA teeth.

•°《▪︎♡▪︎》°•

Peeta loves surprises.

Giving them, receiving them. If it's unexpected, Peeta is practically bouncing off his chair to figure out what to do with it.

It made everyday life sweeter. Slipping a note into his apron pocket when he wasn't looking for him to discover, finding a million more hidden in my apron. Little drawings hidden amongst everyday things, like the wildflowes Peeta likes to draw and place next to my powders and perfumes. But best of all surprises were the little pastries we would make when the days were slow and the other was watching the front of the bakery. Usually using scraps, because Peeta detests wasting food, but always delicious nonetheless.

The best innocent surprise, I should say.

Today was an especially slow day. Rain pounding down in District 12, making the roads thick with mud. It's a blessing for the hot ovens that fight against the cold seeping through the front windows. Although they're helping me more than Peeta, who's up front perched at the counter, insistent as always that someone needs to be watching the shop. "We won't hear the bell over the rain," he'd said.

I knew better than that. There were tells when Peeta wanted a surprise. He'd never just ask for something, always fearing rejection. Of course the minute I opened my mouth he was ready to do whatever I had even intrusively dreamed of so long as it meant love and praise. But to ask for himself? It's a whole different matter. So when he is insistent I work alone in the back, I understand that this is his own silent way of asking for some sort of surprise. And with the way his broad shoulders look in that pale yellow knit sweater, who am I to deny him?

I'm not one to deny him anything, quite frankly.

The best surprises of all are when we sneak up behind the other, always starting so innocently. Maybe while one of us is baking, maybe while one of us is simply dressing. With the quick slip of a hand, it doesn't take long before the other is panting and begging for release. Not that we always give it to each other.

Peeta liked sneaking up on me in private. Usually when I was in the back baking.

"What are you working on?" He'd usually ask.

"Custom order," I may answer with a smile. He liked my smiles, always said so.

"What are the details?" He'd ask. He'd put his hands on my lower back, rubbing soft enough to not disturb me while still working out some knots.

Then I'd prattle off details. This one is for so-and-so down on whatever-street-or-corner, they'd like a cake.

"For the Harvest Festival?" He'd ask. I'd nod, still focused on my task. "How many orders do we have for the Festival?"

"A good bit, it's our busiest time," I'd always say with a bright, soft tone to my voice. He'd chuckle, placing a small kiss on the back of my neck and pressing his hips against mine from behind, usually revealing his hard on.

"So, how many orders this year?" He'd ask. His hands would work at a knot, his breath hot on my neck, and his hips would roll ever so slowly against mine, taking his time to build both of us up.

"Ah, I think- I think 12?" I'd say, trying to focus on both him and whatever I was making. Cake. Right. Stir.

"12?" He'd ask. His cock would be deliciously hard, grinding against my clothed cunt just a bit harder as his hands would return to my hips, steadying me against him. "That's pretty good."

"Double digits," I'd say brightly, my voice breathy as I struggle more to focus. Cake. Stir. Hands, not hips.

But I'd always do hips instead, leaning back and tilting my head ever so slightly so he can see my enjoyment.

"You need to stir," Peeta would gently guide in my ear. My back would press against his front, his chin now resting on my shoulder.

"I know," I'd say softly. I didn't know shit.

He'd chuckle, one hand slipping to my front to cup one of my breasts.

"Need to get those orders out," he'd remind me. "You always seem so stressed about being on time."

"One of us has to be," I'd say. His hand on my hip would find the band of my pants, slipping past them and teasing me, sliding his fingers against my wet folds.

"Pick up the whisk," he'd instruct. My hands would shake as they obeyed, moving from being splayed across the marble counter to resume my task.

"Stir slowly," he'd say. His large fingers would slip over my entrance, coating himself in the thick lube now dripping from me. "You want to make sure the texture's correct."

It took such mental energy to balance the two things. Especially when he would finally sink in his middle finger, always going knuckle deep and twirling it around inside of me, making sure to leave no spot untouched. His other hand would pinch and pull at my breast, giving special care to make his fingers replicate the feeling of his soft lips wrapped around my sensitive nipples.

"What's the next order?" He'd ask. I could feel myself dripping down his hand, and I knew he loved this. Peeta would do whatever he could to make sure I was wet, even when he wouldn't go any further than simple teasing. I think he liked the idea of me always being ready. Not that he would assume. He always started out slow, and if I ever said no it was never a big deal. He'd simply continue talking to me and go on with his day perfectly fine. But if I was willing, he'd always massage or do whatever until he could feel my arousal himself. I think it's why he likes eating out best. Especially when I'd talk him through it, usually promising to cum down his throat while tugging his soft blond hair. His eyes would grow wide and soft at that, his whimpers increasing as he'd fuck me quicker with his tongue, grinding himself against whatever. It was a beautiful mess he'd turn himself into, desperate and begging silently as he clutched my hips.

"The what?" I'd ask breathlessly. I was tight around him, focused on how slow and sweet he was pumping in and out, twirling and wiggling his finger inside of me. His other hand slipping under my shirt, and his lips sucking gently at my neck, careful not to leave bruises.

"The orders, sweetheart," he'd gently remind me. "What's the next one?"

My lips would part, eyes fluttering shut as I tried to remember. His middle finger would pump out and then pump back in with the addition of his pointer finger, tearing a soft moan from my throat.

"Shh," he'd gently whisper. "We're at work."

He liked this little game. Ramping me up, forcing me to behave a certain way so to not tip off customers. If Peeta wouldn't immediately be arrested for it, something tells me he'd simply fuck me in the front room, bent over the register counter during business hours and just act like it's a normal thing. Such a sweet boy.

"I- ah- need to look at the book," I'd say. He'd roll my nipple between his two fingers, his other two fingers pumping slightly faster as his lips suck at the spot just under my ear.

"You have such a good memory though," he'd say. "You can remember. Just think."

That's a lie. I have a horrible memory and we both know it. But if I say I can't, he'll pull away. Sweet and gentle, he'll go get the book and place a million kisses on my cheek before leaving me to my work and dizziness.

Next order. Next order. That's easy. It's a tart with cream on top. Cream. God, I'd like his cock in my mouth right now.

"Next order. Come on, pretty girl. I know you know it," he'd softly encourage.

"I know it," I'd moan, my head tilted back and resting on his shoulder, fucking his fingers instead of working on the cake. He feels so good, so warm and protecting. Simply smelling the traces of dill and cinnamon baked into his skin made my mind shut off, my eyes growing tired from the feeling of safety.

"I know you know it," he'd say so sweetly. "You're smart, pretty. And you've got a delicious cunt I'd love to fuck over and over if I could," he'd say softly, placing warm kisses on my neck between each point. I was panting openly now, squeezing my eyes shut as I tried desperately to remember who ordered what.

His fingers curled inside of me, making rapid 'come hither' motions fast enough to steal a soft, sudden cry fron my lips. Peetas mouth found mine, swallowing my moans and giving me some of his own.

"I may have to count down, sweet girl," he'd warn me. His fingers had found my g spot, hitting and rubbing it at rapid speed. The cuff of his sweater is soaked from me, his hand sticky and coated. I shake my head quickly, moaning and gripping the counter as best I could to keep myself standing.

"I can remember," I whimpered. Peeta laughed softly.

"I know you can, sweet girl. But look at you, you're a total mess." His voice is sweet and kind, his eyes taking in my current state. "I can't have you all dumb back here during work hours."

He's sweet but he's cruel. God, he's cruel!

"I think there's berries in it," I stammered.

"Ten," he's start patiently, his teeth tugging at my earlobe.

"N-no, wait! There's- There's berries and there's..." I'm completely making this up. I have no clue what's next.

"Nine," he continued, knowing this.

"That's not fair, you started low on purpose!" I whined.

"Eight." He wouldn't argue. I was right.

"It's got- got cottage cheese frosting." I'm so close, so awfully close. I can feel myself clenching around him rapidly, my pussy swallowing his fingers quicker and quicker as I climbed closer towards the edge.

"Seven." Oh, God. This motherfucker.

"Six. Come on, good girl. You can do this," he'd encourage sweetly, kissing my cheek and trailing to my collarbone with said kisses.

"They wanted flowers on the top. Violets, I remember that!" That detail is actually true, surprisingly. The candy violets were always easy to remember because I loved them so much.

"Five." His other hand kneeded my breast, admiring the soft flesh and running his thumb over my stiff, aching nipple repeatedly. "Four."

"You're speeding up," I whined. "This isn't fair."

He let out a soft 'aw,' apologizing and speeding his hands to bring me closer to the edge.

"If you can come before one, I'll fuck you right here," he promised. "You can come before one, can't you?"

I nodded stupidly, moaning and panting as I sped up my hips, slamming down on his hand repeatedly. Cake details be damned, this is my mission now.

"Three." I'm so impossibly close.

"Two."

"Wait a minute, slow down-"

"One."

With one final, cruel, hard thrust of his hand he slips away, leaving me to almost crumple to the ground and opening my eyes to blink stupidly, trying to process what just happened.

"You okay?" He asked softly, his dry hand cupping my cheek and looking at me carefully with his sweet, hazel eyes.

A long, soft whine escaped me, batting my lashes as I lean against him and whisper as many 'please's as I can, pressing a dozen kisses all over him. He laughed softly, returning the kisses with whispered 'I love you's.

"Let me go get that book," he'd said. And that was that until that evening when he made up for it like he always did.

Now I was carefully removing a tiny apple pie made from leftovers meant specifically for Peeta. The rain was as bad as ever as I entered the front room, Peeta leaning on the palm of his hand while he struggled not to doze off. His long lashes flutter softly, his lips pressing against each other and his jaw a bit tight.

"Hi sleepyhead," I whisper, sneaking up behind him. He started a little, turning to look at me with the sweetest smile he has.

"Hi," he says cheerily, his voice just a touch gravely. His eyes glance down to the small treat in my hands, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "Is that for me?"

"Of course it is," I say, placing it in front of him. "Figured you could use something to warm you up. It's freezing up here."

He chuckles. "It's not that cold," he says as he picks up the fork I'd placed next to the tiny pie and began scooping some up.

"Liar," I teased. "You're shivering."

He shifts in his seat slightly. "Not from that," he says, a small blush growing on his cheeks. He takes the first bite, then another, smiling and leaning his head against my shoulder.

"Thank you, dear," he says softly. He leans in for a kiss to which I happily oblige, cupping his jaw with my left hand. His lips taste sweet, the sticky apple and cinnamon tasting delicious on him. I swipe my tongue across his lips, stealing a soft moan from him as he allows my tongue access to his mouth, melting in my hands. His hand dropped the fork, accidently missing the pan and instead hitting the counter, but neither of us care. His hand comes up to the back of my neck, pulling me closer to silently ask me for more.

My other hand trails down to his lap, finding one of his hands already there, palming his stiff, clothed cock through his pants.

"Is this what you were doing when I came up?" I ask softly, pulling away from the kiss only a bit. He chases me, biting at my bottom lip to drag me back to him. That's a yes, then.

My tongue explores his warm mouth, tasting him while my hand traces the outline of his dick, pressing and flicking against the tip. He whines, bucking softly into my hand, desperate for more.

"Can you stay quiet?" I ask him, pulling away again. This time my hand on the back of his neck grabs his golden locks, holding him still as I look into his eyes. His cheeks are red as well as his lips, kiss swollen and damp. His breathing is heavy, his eyes blown out. Barely touched and already a beautiful mess.

"Huh?" He asks, his voice higher than usual as he tries to focus. His hand grasping my wrist, making sure to keep my hand where he can buck against it.

"If I asked you to, would you stay quiet?" I repeat gently, teasing him with kisses by leaning forward and pulling away. We both liked this.

"Yes," he said quickly. "Anything."

"Anything?" I ask, raising my brows.

"Anything."

Alright.

I press a quick, admittedly sloppy kiss to his lips once more before dropping to my knees and slipping under the counter. His brows furrow in confusion before he realizes what I'm doing.

"You can't!" He whispers frantically. "What if someone walks in?"

"That's why I asked if you could stay quiet," I say patiently. "Can you?"

He bites his lip, obviously unsure. His eyes dart between me and the shop door, thinking.

"We can wait," I offer genuinely. This seems to be the deciding factor.

"I'll be quiet," he promises eagerly. "I've got a pie I can shove in my mouth if I can't, right?" He jokes, his smile crooked and eager as his hands work quickly to begin freeing himself. He's excited alright.

"Right," I say, taking his hands away and undoing the buttons on his pants myself. "Just keep watch of the shop, alright sweet boy?" He nods, placing his arms on the counter and trying to resume his position.

I slip his cock from the confines of his clothes, pressing a soft wet kiss to the underside along a thick vein. A quiet whine escapes him, his hand covering his mouth. I'm not truly worried about him being quiet, no one is going to come in here during such bad weather. It's just an edge to help work him into a frenzy, knowing full well he never stays quiet. I'd thought I was vocal when we started our relationship, but Peeta easily takes the cake.

His cock is warm, half hard against my lips that trail his veins. My tongue slides from his tip to his base, barely any pressure on his skin. Grazing always works best to start out with. When I reach his base I lap at his skin, blowing soft, cold air against the wet spots to make him squirm in his chair. I focus on his base for a while, sucking, licking, blowing. Ever so gently I even bite just the tiniest bit, enough for him to notice the edges of my teeth along his red, pulsing cock. His voice is soft, panting quietly.

My tongue trails slowly up his cock, exploring different ridges and spots that make him whimper quietly, working my way back to his tip which is soaked with thick, warm precum. I wrap my lips around him, swiping the moisture away with my tongue in one round sweep. I relish in the cry it tears from his throat, the dozen little apologies he whimpers immediately after. His hand covers his mouth, and the other trails down to gently cup the back of my head. I smile around him, swirling my spit around his tip as I suck gently, pressing my tongue against the underside of his dick.

His fingers play with my hair, unintentionally tugging it and apologizing as he does. I simply squeeze his thighs and begin lowering myself, taking him until his tip hits the back of my throat, taking deep, even breaths to fight off the gags that threaten to escape me.

It's when my nose buries in his soft, curly hair at his base that the bell of the front door rings.

"Hi!" Peeta says a little too quickly, a little too brightly. "Welcome to Mellarks Bakery. How may we- I help you today?"

I'm frozen, his hand gripping my hair out of anxiety. If I pull away, we'll be done. If I stay here, Peeta may very well have to make good on his promise.

Although, acting has never been a challenge for him, has it?

The customer is describing a custom tart she wants made, then pulling out a long list and prattling about this, that, and the other thing. Her accent clearly shows her as a Capitol transfer, and these orders always take forever given that they still have a hard time releasing the concept of not over indulging. But this time I don't plan on complaining.

My tongue begins to move slowly, rubbing carefully along the bottom of his cock while I watch his face carefully. He's smiling at the woman who's still going down the list, his eyes glancing at me to confirm this is what we're doing. With a small nod from me, his hand casually covers his mouth once more and he resumes focus on the woman, his other hand now guiding my head slowly, carefully.

He pulls me to the tip of his dick, working me back and forth slowly on just that spot. My tongue works quickly, my lips wrapping around him tightly to help create proper suction around him while I suck.

"Do you have pumpkin?" The woman asks.

"W- what?" Peeta asks, clearing his throat. "Oh, pumpkin. I'll admit I'm running a little low, it's been a popular request since we don't grow them locally. I've requested more but I don't know if they'll be in in time, so if you want something that uses it you'll have to get it-" his voice cracks as I deepthroat him again, swallowing around him quickly before returning myself to his tip. He clears his throat. "You'll have to reserve it right now," he finishes. I can see him quickly scoop up some of the pie, shoving it in his mouth and trying to hide his blush. It's lucky for us how oblivious Capitol born citizens are.

His hand guides me faster, focusing on fucking his tip near the back of my throat since we both know full well how hitting the back of my throat isn't an option. We can't risk any noise gagging may cause since it may not be covered up by the soft music playing on the shop speakers, a gift from Beetee for the reopening.

His pace is fast, faster than it should be. He's close, smiling at the woman and acting as though everything is normal. His large vein throbs, precum spilling out of him with each new thrust into my mouth. My hand reaches to press two digits against the soft spot behind his balls, a sensitive spot that makes him cry and squirm.

His jaw tightens as I do this, his eyes darting down daggers quickly. I can hear coins on the counter, Peeta accepting the list and opening the register. With the loud 'clank' springing forth from the older device, he takes the chance to slam my face down fully on his cock, his fingers making the coins loudly shift around as he gives the customer her change. Tears spring to my eyes from the sudden force, swallowing around him as I focus on my breathing to recover. He promises the woman he'll do what he can and wishes her a good day, and she coos sweetly. She reaches across the counter, patting his cheek and calling him a sweet boy before turning and walking out of the bakery, the bell chiming at her exit.

Peeta looks down at me, smiling brightly. "Hi," he says with a newfound excitement.

I moan around his cock. He gets it.

"You okay?" He asks, his hands moving to cup my cheeks. I make an affirming noise, trying to smile. "I wasn't too rough, was I?" He asks, his thumbs swiping away the small tears dangling from my bottom lashes. I shake my head, swallowing around him. He moans softly, his grip tightening.

"Yeah, I kinda forgot you like it when I am, don't you?" He asks, beginning to slowly pump his dick in and out of the back of my throat. I moan happily, taking him as easily as I can.

"You know how hard it was not coming down your throat with that lady in here?" He asks. "I had to edge myself so that it wouldn't become known how much I like fucking your throat."

My cunt throbs at his words, his closeness making him willing to be more rough. He starts fucking my face in earnest, tearing noises from both of our throats as he loses himself.

"Can't do that again," he pants. "Next time I'm just taking you. I don't care who walks in." He's moaning openly now, his cock abusing me. I can feel him throbbing, twitching. There's enough precum it's all I can do to focus on swallowing and breathing.

"Show this whole District how much I love you," he babbles. "I'll eat you out on this fucking counter, I don't give a fuck."

I press my heel against my clit, grinding into it to relieve some friction as my hands steady my body against his thighs. The chair underneath of him creeks horribly. If anyone walked in now, I don't even think we'd have a small second to hide what we're doing.

"I love your fucking pussy," he rambles, his eyes beginning to flutter shut. "Love your fucking mouth. You take me so well. So eagerly."

I moan around him, spit dribbling from my mouth, hair stuck to my face. His balls slam against my chin, his wet curls pressing against my nose as he face fucks me like a rabid animal.

"I'm gonna cum down your throat," he announces. "Then you're gonna cum down mine. Again," thrust. "And again," thrust. "Until we don't even have to make dinner from how full we'll be." Goddamn, he's close.

His hands are rough, gripping my face. "Rub your tongue harder," he commands. I do, putting as much pressure as I can on his throbbing vein. He moans loudly, leaning forward and clutching my head.

"I'm coming," he pants, his voice high and tired. "Fuck, I'm coming-!"

His warm, thick load shoots down my throat, filling my mouth so much I cant breathe if I want to swallow it all.

"Such a sweet girl," he praises. "So sweet and good, eager to make me cum." His face is pressed against the cool counter, his chest heaving as he recovers his breath. His thumbs stroke my cheeks at different paces, small whimpers escaping him as I milk him dry with my mouth, making sure not a drop is left behind. When he's fully softened, I place a small kiss on his tip before tucking him back in, rebuttoning his clothes and patting his thighs one more time.

It takes a moment for me to rise, my joints stiff and my mind scrambled from the abuse it had just suffered. I stumble a little as I stand, Peeta's weak arms collecting my body and bringing me into a warm embrace.

"You're wonderful," he whispers, resting his head against my chest. I chuckle softly, placing a soft kiss on the top of his messy hair.

"So are you," I say.

He looks up at me, flushed and smiling at me with the most wonderful, lazy look on his face.

"Your turn," he says, finding a new wave of surprising strength and placing me on the counter.

"Peeta, we're still open," I giggle, batting his hands away.

"I know," he says. "Did you think I was joking?"

He stares at me, smiling and eager as he begins to part my legs.

This is going to be a long night.

•《♡》•

Whoever gets second place on the poll is who I'm writing next. Feel free to send in requests for characters/scenarios! See you next time, you degenerates <3

Masterlist

[muzzlemouths]

Your DFtR AU has garnered my interest.

What lore have you in store, dear Muzz?

Doesn't matter what, take your pick, your pick of poison.

(I smell angst. I live for it. Danger and thrills too. that not so much)

But really, I'd love to hear what you've got in store for this AU!

Hmmmm it's going to be difficult navigating the lore without giving away too much. For now, I'll drop some of the more minor details that won't spoil anything immediately plot relevant.

Sun / Moon

They're solar powered! The pro of this is that they don't need to scramble to find an outlet in the middle of the woods. The con is that moonlight doesn't produce nearly as much power, which means Moon is essentially running on Sun's fumes whenever he's out. He's exhausted. Always.

The eye with the faded pupil has less vision in it. They aren't entirely blind on that side, but rather everything seen through that eye is faded and distorted, which can be a little disorienting.

Shoutout to @normal-about-the-dca who caught this one: Sun still wears the friendship bracelets from his last year as a counselor, but Moon removes them when he's out (he respectfully keeps them safe in his pockets, however). This is because Moon wants to forget, but Sun is scared of forgetting.

Unlike in the canon game, Sun and Moon's pants are lined with soft cotton. Sun gets distressed when too much of it is lost due to new holes and tears, so Moon has formed a habit of stealing cushions from the ranger's office every few years. So far it's just been chalked up to children's pranks.

Sun and Moon were in charge of almost all the recreational activities in camp. To this day, Sun sings or hums songs to himself as a way to cope, and Moon tells spooky campfire stories to any small wildlife that happens by at night.

Aside from keeping each other company through conversation, Sun and Moon will also sing to each other, and even play games. Only being able to switch out during natural day/night cycles means simple games like tic-tac-toe can take a week to win.

Y/N

As the newest stranger in the friend group, they are desperate to fit in. Not because they actually like any of these people, but because they've had a shit run of life and, well, Dolly's mom is a board member for their dream college, and Devin's brother promised them a job. The endless "requests" make them feel useful, and they have themself convinced that the constant mistreatment and being made an outcast is still less lonely than actually being alone.

Actually quite the spitfire, but appears outwardly meek due to how often they're treading on eggshells to avoid ruining the (paper thin) relationship between them and everyone else.

----Sun figures out that they're hiding something right off the bat but is elated to discover that y/n is far more daring than they look.

Has never been to summer camp (this is devastating news for Sun and Moon, you understand)

Theater kid with abandonment issues. They get along with Sun and Moon like peas in a pod....... which complicates things when the fun begins.

[wings-of-ink]

Hear ye, hear ye!

All of you who have been anxiously awaiting Chapter 4 can send a big thank you to the Microsoft mayhem that happened on Friday. Because of it, I have had two entire, unprecedented, days off of work during which all I did was write and edit chapter 4! Stuff like this never happens to me either, so I ate it up. My work computer is still super broken too, so who knows what will happen tomorrow, lol.

So, chapter 4, barring anything disastrous that I do not yet foresee – is coming very soon. Like, any day this week soon. For now, I am looking for bugs and other errors until I feel comfortable getting the update loaded. I will also be updating the warning list and some things on the itch page. I keep feeling like I'm forgetting something I wanted to do, and am having a hell of a time remembering what it was…

Anyway, if it interests you, more details below!

In going through some of the Google Error Reports, I had a couple that I either could not resolve or find.

It was reported that checking player stats in chapter 1 would not work – that it would flash only for a moment. I could not recreate this. If anyone else has seen this, please let me know.

In the end of chapter 2 where there are multiple ways to spend your time there seems to be some issues with how choices become unselectable after certain clicks and it just doesn't seem to function correctly. I have fixed the issues I have found, but could not recreate all of the instances that were reported. This section may get an overhaul in the future since I understand the coding a bit more now.

It was also reported that fonts are not changing. There is definitely a weird issue with this and it will take some time for me to sit down and hammer out. The fonts do change for me, but notably, I don't think they are switching to the correct font types. They don't even appear to be the same fonts from when I first starting this project, lol. This issue is on hold for now.

The last 2 bonus segments for the end of chapter 3 are being pushed aside for the time being. I kept finding myself feeling like I was hammering them into the chapter and it was a little exhausting. If I force it, it will be less enjoyable to read. The segments that are missing are the ones for hanging out with Zahn and Nathanael. Zahn's is easy to wiggle in elsewhere at least, but I'm not sure if Nathan's will make it in or not. We'll see, my motivation was purely for chapter 4, so now that it is ready to go, I'll have another crack at it before I drop or move them completely. They aren't super important to the story, but are just for fun (and if Oswin got his, it's only fair that Zahn gets theirs too). That last section of chapter 3 ended up way too long, so it may get adjusted later anyway.

As with any work in progress, I can't guarantee that your old saves will work. That's probably how we are going to have to roll for a bit until I really get things nice and smooth. Eventually, I will add an option to start from a later chapter and go through and make the (MANY) relevant choices to skip ahead. This may be implemented when Chapter 6 is ready to go since all the ROs will be available.

I also want to figure out how to implement named saves to make it easier for you to sort. I appreciate IFs that feature this, but I do not yet know how to do it, but I'm going to research. I like to play through with several MCs, and I'd like to offer enough info in the saves and/or Stats Menu that you can do this and easily know who you are playing as. Let me know what you would like most in the Player Stats Menu too. Note, that some options do not appear here until you choose them in the story.

Coming up…

Since Chapter 4 is down, I will soon be posting a big poll about future IFs. I've been compiling info for it here and there for a couple weeks on possible options for me to write in conjunction with God-Cursed. So, stay tuned for that in the coming days.

I will FINALLY get to my inbox in earnest as well! I will keep reaction asks paused until further notice since they take me the longest to answer. Feel free to still send in comments or quicker questions. If your question is too spoilery to answer, I will not be able to post about it.

Anyway, hope you are all doing well! I can't wait to see what you think of chapter 4. I hope you enjoy it. I'll get it out just as soon as I feel comfortable enough with it. ^_^

[ghostcrows]

We just are not ready yet to switch to a harm reduction frame of mind like the constant back and forth of whether mental illness is "an excuse" or not really proves that. Like there is such a need still for someone to be innocent and someone to be guilty and therefore for somebody to be good and somebody to be bad. How can any conflict ever be resolved under that lens. I dont know. This deeply frustrates me. How can you go back to "this is your personal responsibility alone" when you also talk about how individualism is a farce and how systemic and rooted these problems are on Top of the biological components. Which Is still not to say "mentally ill people can never ever hurt anyone on purpose and since it was by accident you have to forgive them immediately" but it's also not to say, y'know. "Just get a therapist and take your medicine and shut up and stop being a bad person of your own volition"

It's like, we forget, the apology and the forgiveness are between the people in the conflict first and foremost, and it's about how they deal with it, not whether we think one person or the other is more justified. Everything is not an Am I The Asshole post you know

We have made this like. Torturous spectacle of the act of apology and remediation and accountability where it feels like every word has to be so calculated. Because if it's not, like. You aren't doing it right and you don't really mean it and you're not really sorry. Don't explain too much or too little, don't talk about yourself too much or too little, don't say the words "I'm sorry" too much or too little, if a disorder was involved in your behavior don't bring it up because it isn't relevant

Goddamn I meant to draft this but ok

Yeah I didn't finish my thought but this stuff just makes my head spin

[plusvanity]

same anon here! thx for answering <3 but if he's not a psychopath/ sociopath how do you explain his murder? genuinely curious

His crime was motivated by envy. Envy is a powerful sentiment rooted in self-doubt, a complex of inferiority, poor emotional intelligence, and a lot more things that one shouldn't be proud of.

Childishly, he got frustrated over the title and the prestige that he couldn't obtain, so he decided to eliminate the object of his frustration (Øystein).

The most primordial difference between psychopaths (factor 1), sociopaths and narcissists is motivation.

In Maslow's hierarchy of needs, psychopaths have on the highest level physiological needs : money, power, sex. In other words, what is at the very base for a normal person, it's at the top for them. Contrary to narcissists who have self-esteem needs at the top.

You will never find psychopaths on the streets doing crimes. You will find them in high-status positions, as politicians, successful businessmen, judges, etc.

Now talking about the differences between narcissists and sociopaths. They can look the same from the distance, they can both commit crimes.

What I believe that Varg did was switching from his standard narcissistic state to a secondary sociopathy. This can happen when a collapsed narcissist (devoided of any narcissistic supply) gets pushed and pushed far beyond his limits by something or someone so frustration that it makes him lash out. Don't forget that a narcissist already has low empathy, very low tolerance to stress and high paranoia. So, from the start, a normal person wouldn't be able to do what Varg did.

Varg got so mad that he drove for 5-6 hours in the middle of the night with one thing on his mind. This was his secondary sociopathic outburst.

The opposite of becoming secondly sociopathic, is becoming borderline. A collapsed narcissist, stripped of all supplies, that lost his independence and can't get back on his feet, neither is pushed to the extreme of acting out (what I earlier explained) becomes needy. In fact, there are theories that suggest that every borderline is a failed narcissist and every narcissist starts as a borderline (look that up).

If he was fully a sociopath, he would've committed more than one crime, wouldn't be able to maintain a long-lasting relationship, wouldn't stop at JUST receiving admiration on the Internet.

Narcissists are prosocial creatures, not antisocial. What is the most important for them is receiving praise and endless admiration.

Varg is chronically online, highly dependent on the reactions that he gets. He still talks about Øystein because he knows that what generates him more controversy and reactions and because he will never get over his envy. This is how he keeps himself relevant, how he keeps himself alive.

Sociopaths are even more violent and they act on impulse at all given times, can't have relationships, and in general, they are big scammers, not 'online influencers'.

Psychopaths aren't in jail, or on the streets. They're the guys who want to rule the world and probably do. End of story.

[togrowoldinv]

Ghost of You

Wanda Maximoff x Reader

When Wanda leaves for the battle over the accords, she doesn’t come back home. Would she ever return?

Note: This takes place from Civil War to Infinity War. It’s an angsty one. Enjoy!

Please also note that I’ve switched to having a library blog instead of doing tag lists. Please follow @togrowoldinvlibrary for updates!

Wanda Maximoff Masterlist, Main Masterlist

Wanda Maximoff is the reason that your world goes round. She’s the reason your feet dance to the beat of an imperceptible drum.

When you met her, it took you by surprise how quickly you fell in love with her. You weren’t a part of her hero world, but rather you had a normal job and a normal life.

But when you were with Wanda, her life made perfect sense. She felt so normal, so able to exist and take up space.

You knew that things had gotten difficult between the Avengers. Wanda told you about the accords and how she felt like they were never going to be a team again.

She was terribly upset about it. Her newfound family was dissipating in the blink of an eye.

Before she left your house for the fight, she held you close and kissed your forehead.

“When will you be back?” You asked her. Your hand was tangled in her hair.

“I don’t know,” she answered. Her voice was quiet, truly unsure.

You sighed and took her hand in yours, feeling the coolness of the metal against you. Bringing her hand to your lips, you kissed the back of it gently.

“I love you,” you told her. She breathed deeper.

Wanda then let go of your hand and carefully took one of her rings off. Kissing your hand, she took it and placed the ring on your finger. It felt like a promise.

“To keep a piece of me with you while I’m gone,” she explained.

“I’ll treasure it,” you told her. Tears welled up in your eyes.

Wanda loved your sadness away. For some reason, it felt like the last time it would happen.

“I’ll love you forever,” Wanda said once she was by the door.

“I love you, Wanda. Everything will be just fine,” you replied.

The goodbyes felt rushed with just one more kiss. Wanda had to go help half of her friends and fight the other half. It didn’t make any sense to her.

You’re not really sure what happened after that. You heard on the news that a few of the Avengers were on the run, but you didn’t know the fate of the others. You didn’t know where Wanda was and there was no way to find out.

You learned that it was top secret information. The remaining free Avengers didn’t know about your relationship with Wanda. The only person who knew was Natasha, and she was on the run.

It has been two years of no contact at all from Wanda. You tried to move on, but you couldn’t forget her. You couldn’t forget all the promises you made together. You couldn’t stop listening to her favorite song over and over again.

The ring she placed on your finger is your reminder of her. You hold it close to your heart.

Wanda was alive, you told yourself that she had to be. Surely, someone would’ve reached out to you if not. Unless everyone was gone.

That thinking became oddly relevant on a random weekday. The sun was shining, and the world was ending. You didn’t really know what was happening, but people around you seemed to just disappear into thin air.

You had no idea why you didn’t join them. It felt like watching a movie scene unfold in front of you. You ran home and locked all of your doors.

It’s been two days since what the news is referring to as a catastrophic loss of humankind. You’re still confused and terrified, not having slept in days.

Suddenly, there’s a knock on your door. You look out the peephole to see a blonde woman. She doesn’t look immediately familiar, but when you look closer you realize who it is.

“Natasha?” You open the door with the word.

“Hey y/n,” she says. Her voice is quiet, distant. She looks like she’s been through hell. Her suit is ripped and dirty and her eyes are rimmed red from emotion.

“What’s happening? The news isn’t saying anything, but-“

“We lost,” Natasha interrupts you. She walks into your house and you shut the door. Nat fiddles with her hands, something you never see her do.

“You lost? What does that mean?” You ask her. You walk towards her. You notice her green eyes are filling with tears.

“We lost to Thanos and he snapped away half of the population,” Natasha says.

Your head feels like it could explode. What do her words even mean?

“Where’s Wanda?” You ask her. She doesn’t answer. “Where’s Wanda?” You ask louder this time.

Natasha looks down at the floor. She’s never seemed smaller. The words come out in a whisper, “She’s gone.”

“What do you mean gone?”

“She disappeared with the others,” Nat answers.

“No, she didn’t,” your words come out quietly. And then you get angry. “No! No, she didn’t!”

You’re pacing back and forth and Natasha watches for a moment before she steps closer to you.

“Y/n, it’s alright. We’ll figure out what happened and do what we can,” Natasha says. She’s trying to keep her voice calm.

“How did this happen?” You don’t really ask her. It’s more so rhetorical.

Natasha’s hand reaches for your shoulder to stop your pacing. You flinch. You haven’t been touched in years.

“Natasha, please you have to save her. You have to, please,” you beg her. Both of you are crying at this point. “Please, I can’t live without her!”

Natasha finally pulls you into her arms. You grasp her shirt front and cry into her chest. She cries silently while holding you.

“It’s going to be okay,” she says over and over again. You cry into her arms for what feels like hours. She doesn’t move from her spot, being the steady rock you need.

“I’m sorry. I know you’re upset too,” you say once you finally stop crying for the moment.

“I am, yeah. We lost a lot of people,” Natasha says.

The two of you sit down on your couch and she tells you of the state of the team. She doesn’t know about the ones in space, she has to assume they’re gone. Nat tells you of her family, of her sister, and you hold her as she cries.

When Nat leaves, you sit at the dinner table alone. You turn on Wanda’s favorite song. By the end of the song, the ring on your finger feels like it’s burning.

You slip it off and spin it on the tabletop. It comes to a stop as the song comes to and end.

And the music fades just like Wanda did.

Will your feet ever dance again?

[thebibliosphere]

I’m really sorry if you’ve answered this before, but I’m on my fourth day in a row of horrible IBS pain (therefore have no brain cells) and I wanted to know if you have any tips for trying to get all of your different specialty doctors to sit in a room and compare notes with each other because re-explaining the pain you’ve been having for a decade to a new person each time makes it tricky to remember all of the symptoms.

Aw, friend. I’m sorry to hear that. And unfortunately, you’re never going to get all your doctors in one room—not unless you somehow orchestrate it by trapping them in an elevator with you. (Wasn’t that an episode of House? It feels like it should be.)

I see a lot of specialists, and it’s very frustrating how little they seem to talk to each other. Sadly a lot of the onus falls on us to advocate for ourselves and it's profoundly exhausting.

I’ve found a partial work around for doctors not communicating between departments by keeping detailed diaries so I can track symptoms, and bring them up at relevant appointments. I am indeed the patient who shows up to appointments with my own printouts. Some doctors are annoyed by this, if they are, find a new doctor. The good ones like patients who are prepared and take an active part in their healthcare.

Also if a doctor is dismissive of you, ask them to note in your file Why they are dismissing your concerns and for a referal to someone else. A lot of them become a lot more helpful after that.

You are also allowed to bring an advocate with you into appointments. This can be a supportive friend, relative or partner who is there to help you, not talk over you.

I often joke to doctors that @mothman-etd is my memory, because often when I’m at appointments I get overwhelmed and forget things. Prior to appointments I sit him down and tell him what I NEED to discuss, and have sometimes even given him a written summary to check in case I miss anything. That way when a doctor says “anything else?” and I blank, there is someone else in the room who can speak up and say, “remember you wanted to talk about X” and enables me to carry on the conversation.

After that, it's just an ungodly amount of dogged persistence and switching doctors if necessary.

I hope things improve for you soon. Good luck.

[beneathsilverstars]

MY ENTIRE ISAT LIVEBLOG

COPY PASTED FROM TWITTER LET'S GO!!!

oh my god i love isabeau

the correct reaction to an incredibly mediocre pun:

when i talked to odile i said i was gonna make isabeau sleep on the floor but that is NOT true

i was about to say i love all the sparkly stars aesthetic but... the game is literally named after them.... i shoulda known

omg isabeau what were you about to confess 😳👉👈

rock paper scissors is being explained to me in such painstaking depth... but the dialogue is cute, so it's ok

wtf i looped back to the town specifically in order to ask the cook about the openphrase for the one door but there's no option to ask!!

it was the shopkeeper 🤦🏼

so curious about siffrin's touch thing... it makes sense other people might be more conscious of a subconscious reaction to touch than he is, but he's so avoidant of the train of thought, i feel like it must be something a bit less.. subtle...?

damn... tryna give mirabelle the fan mail for the second time.... yikes :( so sorry mira........ is that what happened to the island to the north...? something about it got so retconned that it makes people sick to focus on the exact change?

oh.. siffrin's major memory problems.....

this game is sooo good

siffrin seems upset in the observatory.. at first i thought they were just getting tired/grouchy, but the game sure is named after stars... maybe stars had to do with their past trauma..??

i'm starting to wonder if this isn't their first set of loops and the bone-deep burden of all that (along with the practicalities of your memories constantly not matching reality) is why they forget words and shit....

went and looked at the castle again this loop bc i felt bad that sif never gets to sit down...

king asked if sif remembers REMEMBERS WHAT??? i just knowww after i terribly lose this fight im gonna have to go back through the whole game unlocking new rooms that like unlock my memories or smth

"not when i still can't say it" ofc the king is from the northern island... sif is obviously from there too, and that's why he can't remember most of his past... so that's the thing they both don't remember?

defeated him but like. there's still so many locked doors. i bet like sif is gonna go to sleep and they wake up from the nap like WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M STILL IN THE LOOP?? WE WON?? but they didn't win correctly yet, they didn't actually solve everything that needs solved...

head handmaiden ma'am 😳

is odile's research genealogy??

i thought the reference to "colors" being an esoteric/irrelevant topic was a one-off gag about the art style, but it's plot relevant?? fuck yeah

what if odile is trying to figure out the northern island..??

OHHHHHH

BWAHHH the bonnie quest 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

first time redoing the mira quest.... siffrin!!! be brave!!!!! not only is your new idea good, even if it was bad you could just say oops oh well and switch the script back next loop!!!!!

is siffrin gonna have to learn how to be brave and normal in order to break the loop jdhshdjf (normal here meaning "not a loop-brained convomaxxer")

i hope siffrin can just ask the baker's daughter directly for the book this time hdhdjfj i don't really think the whole goose chase is necessary for the emotional convo.....

oh thank god

ugh i can't wait till sif tells his friends about the loop. is that gonna be sif's quest

HANG OUT QUEST!! YES!!!

hm.. is loop the deity of the northern island..? if stars and astronomy are like their whole thing....

INTERRUPTED AGAIN!!!!!!! AGHHGH!!!!! i know isa can't actually confess till the very end bc it would suck having to go through more loops knowing he likes you but he hasn't actually told you / if you go through a loop post-confession surely that would change quite a bit of dialogue

but AHHHHHH!!!!

oh my god siffrin is going beast mode on the tutorial sadness?? i had to choose "attack" bc it seemed the most different and thus interesting but also omg... there goes the warm friendship glow 😭😭

but ofc that glow would die a horrible sudden death anyway the moment siffrin is confronted with the fact that he is back on that damn loop grind :(

poor thing 😭😭😭😭😭😭

INSTANT REPLAY??????????

the loop power is getting stronger.. u~u;;

I KNEW IT WOULD EVENTUALLY GET WEIRD THAT SIF'S SUCH A HIGH LEVEL... just a couple loops ago i was like damn when is everyone else gonna notice that sif has like multiple crafts that they didn't yesterday

also i noticed a loop or so ago that their battle portrait is frowning and.. i don't think it always was.....?

oh my god the memory of sadness is kinda fucked up but. so useful jdhshfj im tired of avoiding them in the hallway,,

ok but also how do my teammates not notice that they have new equipment, and sometimes a new craft..... in the case of like a hair bow that's easy to gloss over but how does isabeau not go "wtf i'm dealing paper damage?" ??

the problem w telling your friends you're in a time loop is it must be such a fucking relief. and then you loop again

aw, sif.. tell them about the universe...

lol how funny would it be if i died to the rock this time

oops... i'm doing a big check-everything run, but i absolutely didn't do all the village stuff bc i was too excited to help isa... oh well,

i did idly connect that the "weird sadnesses" smell like sugar same as the king's time magic which makes, but i finally just actually thought about it and realized they're also star shaped....

siffrin having this time loop power... is it anything at all like mirabelle's time-resistance power, blessed upon her by the high priestess? did siffrin escape from their fucked up time island, sent out with the power to eventually save it?

odile is sooo close to figuring it out... she just said "verRrRy interesting"

BWAHH new post-level-2 convos!! so cute!!!!! love bonnie's new siffrin-patting routine..... and odile has it SO figured out, when is she gonna say something!!!

siffrin was afraid that he smells like timecraft? bc of looping or bc of repressed reasons.... probably bc of looping,

time for siffy's daily bathroom stall breakdown!!

they even went in happy this time and still managed to psych themself all the way out hdgshsjf

GHOST SIF??? GHOST SIF ON THE WAY TO THE KEYKNIFE??????

BWAHHH ODILE RUFFLING SIF'S HAIR!!! I WAS WAITING AND WAITING FOR MORE PEOPLE TO PICK UP ON IT BEING OK TO TOUCH THEM!!!

"in this moment, you are loved" god it is going to be so hard waking up next loop 😭

HAIR BRUSHING!!! THIS IS SO PEAK

i'm worried that the king's "isn't this the best moment of your lives" rhetoric is going to slowly gain appeal as sif goes through more and more loops... like. they crafted the perfect loop with their found family. they *can't* change it any more, make it any better. ...

EHAT DO U MEAN "NVM" ISA!!!!!! oh my god i can't believe you won't confess until siffrin is like more emotionally centered and open and ready to handle that kind of thing... why r u sooo considerate -_- ur killin them isa

oh my god why is it even worse why is the end of the loop even worse this time oh my GOD sif is gonna be inconsolable I'M inconsolable not isabeau reaching out im sobbing on da couch

ngl i kinda hope this time siffrin is just defeated and doesn't banter about shit and everyone is worried as fuck. sorry sif i just think it would be interesting. that flash of him slaughtering the tutorial sadness was so sick. esp the unique auto-rewind. more of that shit

they did the first convo w mira fine.. nvm i guess.... if that never happens that's gonna be my first fanfiction

another ghost siffrin... after i looped to unlocked floor one to look for articles....... :o

not beau saying "normally i'd be worried about this, but sif doesn't seem worried at all!" when i'm about to touch the tear specifically in order to die...

did the king used to hang out in the observatory... did he write that word (the country's name?) on the papers, and wear out the spot on the globe....... he did find a new home here in vougarde such that he's decided that he can't lose this one too, at all, ever...

i got to loop 30 and i was surprised bc i figured i was at like 25 tops. and now im at 37? i don't think it's been 7 loops since then...???

i've started dreaming about the tick of a clock.. i'm kinda worried i've started wracking up too many loops... i did just zip back and forth across the house a half dozen times checking various items and dead ends....

AHH AUTO REWIND FROM KING ASKING WHERE SIF IS FROM???? followed by "you do not answer" which. implies that wasn't the case before the rewind.?? maybe more like "you do not think about it" l o l oh sif 😭😭😭

i was about to complain that it won't let me zone out of the dying-and-bonnie-running scene but um. different this time. thank you for not letting me zone out,

YEAH IT'S LOOP 40 NOW!! this is right after loop 37 (with a small auto-rewind between)

😭😭😭😭😭😭 isabeau pleeeeease:

hanging out with loop and - we saw the kings first attack?? but how would the rest of the party even get that far without sif?? they'd die to the first rock trap????

oh good sif noticed too. "who was the king attacking".... did a siffrin remnant help the party, has he looped so many times that he can be in multiple places at once???

was the king kmsing??? who tf would he be attackinggg

does the loop end when siffrin loses hope?? but no, then the very first time they defeat the boss they wouldn't have looped... but no, if the handmaiden is just talking shit unrelated to the looping then that coulda still made sif think the loop was fucked, which fucked the loop?

it's kinda heavy how many times you have to k your s in this game... esp when you don't actually have to but it's, like, more convenient than 5-30 extra minutes of running around

siffrin tripping so they don't seem so creepily overpowered is SO sad 😭

fsr it's sadder than going through the motions of a conversation, or tripping bc you tripped last time... it's a whole new lie to offset a whole new problem...

oh yeah my other loop theory was that it ends when siffrin gets too reminded of the northern island..? the memory of the future or whatever the fuck from the big attack idk

siffrin rewinded after his friends saw the ghost.... kinda matches my "when he loses hope" theory. when he feels alone? when he's utterly lost with no clue what to do next..? (lol sif restarting every loop just bc he doesn't have plans for what to do after winning)

NOOO I WAS SO EXCITED TO NOT HAVE TO GO GET THE KNIFEKEY EVERY TIME BUT I DO HAVE TO... BOOOOO...... where's the consistency, loop!!!

i can use a memory to equip it for the boss fight but idc as much about that.... i just wanted to be able to check out the dead end rooms more often instead of having to use the crest to get the knifekey every time....

memory of ghosts, no effect??

oh, the vision of the future happens on the first attack always.. not when the king kills you always...

having the knifekey for the fight kinda isn't worth it.. siffrin only has one measly paper attack anyway, so i usually have them on potions and items duty.... gotta keep mira brothed up so she can cast the super duper shield every single turn

"it's fine. she isn't real to you right now either" god siffrin is gonna be so fucked up when they get out. siffrin is gonna have "everyone else is an NPC" brain

finished doing all four quests together for the second time, and sif's commentary at the end is reeally hitting my "eventually sif will understand the king's pov of wanting to freeze one perfect moment forever instead of going forward to inevitably worse shit" theory :(

"you've noticed you're starting to forget whole loops" AHA...... i'm so curious tho what was sif doing in those skipped loops. ig presumably it'd be whatever they did in the next loop that they actually remember? sticking to the plan several times in a row till it sticks,

does loop remember the skipped loops??

hm. whenever the loop ends early Not due to death (the little auto-reverses) maybe sif just.. forgot everything after that moment? till the normal king attack moment ....? or whatever death they find?

i wonder if the headache of not being able to say/read/think about the northern island is caused by many tiny loops, sending you back to the moment before you said/read/thought it, happening however many times it takes for the rapid time travel to make you so sick you just don't

i teach kid's music classes, and sometimes i'll practice one or two dozen verse variations, then i get to actual class and when i actually do that song i can't remember which variations i've already done? and it gets worse with each class i teach from that lesson plan. so dw siffrin i get it,

ok but wtf is up with the head handmaiden. what's she got to do with this. she's obviously more involved than she seems, she knows Something about the end. and imo it's sus that she was able to bless mirabelle to be impervious to the curse, how's she able to do that.

assuming that the king used to live in the house (spending lots of time in the observatory), euphrasie would've gotten to know him... perhaps seen the beginnings of him getting fucked up powerful...? thought she could handle it on her own but she couldn't?

are the mini auto-loops a meta "reload from last save"? i think it's the same quick rewind sound as actually reloading... i don't do it super often bc why not just loop back and keep my silly little mistake in, but i've done it 2 or maybe 3 times....

this game does such a good job starting in medias res. level 45!! i'm past 70 now. i feel like there's a definite chance i'll hit 90 which means siffrin will have done as much fighting in these loops as they did with their friends through months of travel and adventure.

choosing all the emo answers to the loop convo about how using your dagger would be faster than finding a tear to kill you. sorry frin not my fault you are depressed as fuck

LOOP GOT POSSESSED IN ORDER TO ALLOW ME TO K MY S MANUALLY??????? ??????? damn i had something actually important to talk about this loop too

I HATE PICKING CONVERSATION CHOICES WITH LOOOOOP I WANT TO SEE THE OUTCOME OF BOTH OPTIONS IM SO SPOILED!!!!

AHHHH FRIN FIGURED OUT THAT IT's THEIR COJNTRY! THEY TALKED ABt JT! THEY TRIED TO SAY IT!! BWAHHHHHHHH that was so fucking sadddd oh my godddddddd sif's poor clueless friends trying to stop whatever the fuck was happenin 😭😭

is the king's 9999 attack just saying the country's name, lol

wish craft . . .

oh my god oh my god he's gonna torture my friends to death in front of me oh my god holy shit oh my god oh no oh no oh no oh no

say the name siffrin!!! think the name!!!!!!! it'll fuck you up bad enough that you loop!

oh... sif is repeating their wish over and over..... like when they carve

well. finally a loop where sif wakes up freaking out so bad that their script with mirabelle gets way way off track. lol. just like i wanted. haha. shit

I CAN READ THE ISLAND BOOKS NOW???????? damn worth it fr sorry bonbon

i forget if i mentioned that i was thinking about how siffrin doesn't rly have much to look forward to, like his friends are about to disband...?

i was chatting w ari about it lol when she helped me defeat the king earlier, she was very concerned about how sif didn't have a home to return to, all his friends were talking about going back to their homes but where would sif go, isn't that sad

speaking of ari. very four year old raised by lesbians quote: "i like isabeau's name but i don't like his gender..."

siffrin dont get emo about how they don't hug you that first evening you literally already know why, they think you don't like it

damn. forgot about the rock

i had been thinking that the way the island was erased must be similar to the way the loops work, but couldn't fathom how time manip could erase a whole island. the magic being more general makes more sense. did someone wish away color as well....

i love magic systems where belief in a thing makes it more real but jeez this is scary

i was pretty on track with guessing that non-death loops happen when siffrin loses hope. it's whenever he goes oh fuck oh god i wish that hadn't happened

gotta say. i'm getting soo sick of running around unlocking doors so that i can go down a tear dead end for the nth time. plssss let me loop to "some doors unlocked; tear crest not used" 😭

i'm also starting to get low on loop-forward sparkles...

oh wow. siffrin had a really bad dream this tear-touch loop-back. i really can't ever use the dagger he would get plagued by the horrors. not that he isn't already, but,

i love to draw characters with horrifiedly blank expressions and very very tired eyes i can't wait to draw siffrin. lol

this game was made in a lab for me

every time i accidentally get into a fight with a sadness i'm like "siffrin is so fucked up at this point he should be able to just glare at them and scare them the fuck off" and then i remember that i literally currently have that mode equipped, me and the sadness just dodged in the same direction

can i at least get a memory that lets me one-hit KO the sadness crests- wait holy shit i just opened my craft menu and i literally have a new scissor craft called (just attack) when tf did i get that

.... was siffron's island erased specifically because they got gud at wish craft, and that's a power that the world shouldn't be able to harness...?

OH FUCK THE "remembering the name" STAR WAS SO SYMBOLICALLY STRIKING THAT I DIDN'T RVEN REALIZE THAT IT WAS ACTUAL COLOR...

nooo.. no one even reacted to being poked in the gardening room squeeze? right when sif needs it the most? let's make this set of the loops the worst set ever 🤗

what the Fuck is up with croissants though

i can't believe loop got siffrin to admit to themself that beau was planning to confess and siffrin is just using it to beat themself up. "poor isabeau, he probably can't help having a crush on shitty ol me".

i wish i could give siff a good loop but doing the missions makes them sad now 😭

wow. earlier i was like "what if the king is actually siffrin, weird-magic-shenanigans style". bc sif does have some similar thought patterns. but i was like no that's silly. but now this sad diary is talking abt making another self to talk to????

i also wondered if loop is some kinda shade of siffy??

i am writing this tweet while i let siffrin look through the big window in the observatory for a while. as a treat :(

OH THANK GOD.. ISABEAU IS TELLING SIF A NEW JOKE...: that's a much better treat 😭😭😭😭

oh no nvm their second thought was "i'll need to remember to laugh next time"

why don't siff's friends react anymore when he pokes them in the gardening room. it doesn't make sense.....

finally.. my "sif is quiet and moody and everyone notices" loop.......

sif has been super hungry in the commentary lately... more than normal i think... all those wish loops taking a lot of fuel?

have ppl not been reacting to sif's pokes bc they don't want to bother him when he's already obviously having a rough day...

i liked when they sat on the floor after bumping into the table. so real

finally got that death talk with bonnie.... i wonder when i'll get talk #2 with the other characters... odile has been quite sus of me for ages when's she gonna come out with ittt

ISABEAU PUSHING SIFFRIN AWAY.... probably bc siffrin was being very... sudden and depressed and desperate about it...?

did the daydreaming one's sister move to the northern island or something...

THE LIST IN EUPHRASIE's OFFICE!! it's who wished to save vougarde, and who wished for something else!!

bwuh. thinking about the strength behind the wish "i wish i hadn't fucking done that" when you reach out to someone and they push you away

loop confirmed/unified my theories about why siffrin loops back without death sometimes heheh... the specific wording of "something that feels like the world is ending" or whatever also seems in line with my theory that siffrin is scared of leaving their friends tomorrow

they've got croissant trauma. they've got banana trauma. a cheap continental breakfast is siffrin's worst nightmare

poetic that euphrasie finally heard and replied to me on loop 99. waking up on the big double O more hopeless than ever! ☺️

gotta say it so funny that siffrin is forcing themself to try to get everyone's skills in order to beat the king faster when i beat him easily in probably less than half a dozen rounds last time. forgot to even equip the keyknife! these half-assed quests are taking longer than that...

fucked up house??????

i keep accidentally walking right back out of the door i walked into, lol. this is fun though!

also. ghost ✨???

oh.. the ghost ✨ figure i saw was siffrin, with a black hat..?

maybe.. this is the universe's way of granting both wishes...... vougarde is saved, but stuck in time forever. looping the same day of salvation.

i had wondered what would happen if (once?) siffrin totally lost hope, sure that there was no chance of ever, ever getting out. bc when they lose hope they restart. so they'd just. restart immediately. constant loop. with no chance to do anything to regain that hope.

ghost sif time :3c

mal du pays means homesickness...

SIFFRIN TRIPPED AND IZA CAUGHT HIM.. they're touching !

i've been playing at work but i have to stop and actually do some work now.... ty for taking good naps today baby :')

i can't believe mirabelle and siffrin are canonically moirails now

BUT... BUT WHY DOES SIFFRIN HATE CROISSANTS???

also i saw something on a map i was using about a starry hat?? i never got a new hat...

i also never managed to find the book with the tree on the cover again, now that i could read it...

i'm gonna have to find a full 100%ed playthrough to watch on youtube 🫡

---

reading through ISAT socmed... the first time i saw one of the in-world swears in the game i was like "lol stormlight archive vibes" so it's very funny that one of the first posts i see is "my world building advice is to learn from brandon sanderson" i was sooo right. so true

---

makes no sense to me that mirabelle asked siffrin to not spoil her on their convo topics... not spoil on where the convos *went* sure, but how does she not want to know the basic facts that siffrin now knows about her 😭 so wild

if one of my friends was in a time loop i would be like. please sit down and summarize everything we ever talked about so i can be caught up. but thats just me

---

found some youtube video compilations of missable dialogue/events we are so back

AGHH why does this person not show the full cutscenes 😭😭😭 pls i don't want to have to do a whole ass entire top to bottom loop w like 20 object interactions...... maybe i'll just do it at work tomorrow while the baby naps 😩

at least it was pretty easy getting the initial croissant scene ☺️ but i am NOT redoing the entire last two acts to get the related final loop scene or whatever it is -_-

yayy that one's big enough that i found a video of it ☺️ i do wish i'd been able to do it in game myself instead, but. not redoing half the blinding game rn

---

i Am doing a full loop to get the odile thing though... and in doing so i realized apparently i didn't go through the friend quests manually enough times, sif just had a bit of a mental breakdown abt odile's. which does lead up to the last-loop breakdown better!

NOOO I WAS 3/4 OF THE WAY THRU THIS LOOP TO GET A CERTAIN SCENE AND i was on autopilot and meant to use a crest on the tears but i didn't have the crest yet so selecting "yes" meant touching them and dying fuck meee

i hadn't saved at each floor bc i didn't want to touch my save files w this new offshoot canon...

i'm not actually quite sure what info gets carried over from the previous loop when you loop back to the same floor instead of the beginning or forwards? i'm just gonna try and do floor 3 again and see if it works....

either relooping level 3 messed it up or i wasn't able to get enough suspicion points bc the plantain chips didn't make me sick. gonna go slip on the banana five times and try again

---

... i just used the dagger for the second time and now i'm stuck on a plain black screen and i legitimately can't tell if the game is broken or if the game is making me sit and wait for sif to bleed out

ok it's definitely a bug. wow this is so poignant it really does feel like i fucked around and found out

this is so funny i can open my pockets but i can't use the dagger or call loop.

---

I DID IT I GOT THE SCENE!! it was good i'm glad i saw it. wish i hadn't fucked up and had to do it all twice but i DID IT

[shivunin]

Fanfic Writer Questions

Tagged by @greypetrel - thank you so much! 💗

I know this has made the rounds already. If I tag you and you've already done it, please feel free to tag me in the replies or disregard!

Tagging: @nightwardenminthara @vakarians-babe @transprincecaspian @star--nymph @blightbear @inquisimer @dreadfutures @scribbledquillz

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

43

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

688,185

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Published? Just Dragon Age. But I have some unfinished/unpublished Mass Effect and Baldur's Gate stuff as well.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

All of these are Cullavellan fic:

Your Fate for Mine (129,681 Words | E)

More Than Memory (5,214 Words | E)

Search Your Hands (13,581 Words | E)

Unyielding (3,083 Words | M)

The Epaulet Mate (7,303 Words | E)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes, though more slowly than I used to!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ooh. Probably The Scourge of Sundermount, though it wound up less angsty than the original ending (in which Cullen and Lavellan are turned to stone forever)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'm a sucker for a happy ending, so this is much harder to answer! I am avoiding answering this with the obvious innuendo haha. Maybe In Any Life? I feel like the vibe of that last chapter is so very soft, with a spring breeze blowing through the window in the house Fenris and Maria made together c:

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've gotten some snarky comments, but never outright hate (thankfully!)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes--not sure what is meant by "kind." M/F and F/F--soft and gentle, hard and fast, mildly kinky, plot-relevant and pwp, etc. A variety of smut, haha.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Not really. Crossovers aren't really my jam, but if I wrote one it would probably be Inquisition characters in Mass Effect (like a genre switch thing, not picked up and dropped into our solar system).

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

When I was like 13 on FF.net, yes. It's why I stopped writing fic until I was 28.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Only in a sense! I have a few pieces sharing an OC with a friend that were largely rp first before I set them down as a narrative c:

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

God. Don't ask me this haha. My first DA ship was Fenris/Hawke and it still lives so closed to my heart, but Cullen/Lavellan got me into the fandom and Zevran/Tabris brought me someone very dear to me. I don't think I could ever judge any of them by the merits of the ship alone at this point!

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Hmmm more than I'd like to admit :/ Probably The Red Crossing Arrangement, which is an arranged marriage/Halamshiral still belongs to the elves AU. It took so much more world building that my ability to write it slowly petered out. The odds are high that it will remain at roughly 80k for the foreseeable future (unless I suddenly want to get back to working out trade routes and governance and commerce, which is what did me in; I'm good at world-building culture on account of the degree and all, but the semantics of daily life don't really interest me as much) (tragically, this means the Adalene and Elandrin fix-it portions of this story may never be published :C and this does honestly make me so sad :C)

16. What are your writing strengths?

Voice and characterization/internal dialogue. I've been told that the canon characters I write feel very similar to canon and that's something I'm really proud of c:

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Physical space. I forget to define the setting very, very frequently. It's the next thing I want to focus on in my writing, actually, when I get back into it!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Eh. I think it can add flavor, especially in fantasy settings where the cultures and worlds are built dissimilarly to the real world. I don't think there's anything especially fun about not being able to discern what's happening in conversation---I think it's most effective when it's a handful of phrases that repeat (hello, I'm sorry, I love you, etc.) or when followed by a translation of some sort. As a lover of Latin, I especially find google translations very unreliable and often incorrect. Better to just italicize it and indicate it's another language, imo.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Code Lyoko

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Oof. It depends on when you ask me this haha. For the moment, I think I'm loving As Two Reflected Stars a little extra right now c: I just love wound-tending and idiots in love and this is definitely both!

Blank version below!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

3. What fandoms do you write for?

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

5. Do you respond to comments?

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

16. What are your writing strengths?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

20. Favorite fic you've written?

[prismaticstreams]

How to balance all your interests when you have multiple passions?

I’ve been pondering how to balance all my different passions, interests, and side hustles, as I’m the kind of person who tends to love variety and easily gets excited about new projects. It’s often the completion part that I struggle with! This is a fairly common conundrum for certain personality types, and can also be related to conditions like ADHD. It can be really hard to know how to streamline and simplify things to make it more manageable and less chaotic.

Chronic illness can be a factor here too, as I often start a new project in a high energy period, but then may not have the physical energy to easily complete it. It can be hard to know how to handle this sometimes, as I can’t predict how I’ll feel from day to day or week to week. Sometimes I just have to let something go for a while, and accept that I will come back to it later. I also accept that there’s some projects I will abandon, and I don’t see it as a major problem as long as there’s no financial investment.

So how do you handle this tendency? 

I personally find it’s best to embrace it, and find ways to work around it rather than trying to pigeonhole myself into only one project, passion or interest at a time. However, if you’re trying to make money, earn an income or build a business - and you need to pay the bills with it to survive - then you will probably need to narrow down to one thing at a time for work. You can still allow yourself freedom to explore in your free time, though.

For example, I love borrowing a wide range of books from the library, and reading about a bunch of different topics at once. Switching from one book to another works for me and I find it stimulating. The great thing is that the books all get returned to the library, so they don't create long-term clutter. I also enjoy writing blog posts about a range of different topics, rather than sticking to one particular subject.

Same goes for my art - I have one style that I sell commercially, and then do whatever I want in the rest of my spare time as it captures my fancy. I find creating different IG/Tumblr accounts for particular art styles/niches works well. If it becomes popular and sells it's a cool bonus, but I don't worry too much about it making money. Digital art is great because it doesn't take up storage space, so I'm shifting from doing large pieces on canvas to doing more digital art.

Having said all that, I do have a bunch of blogs and Tumblr accounts floating around on the internet that I've forgotten about and largely abandoned. Same with old creative projects in storage. But it's okay, because I enjoyed exploring that idea/hobby/style for a brief period of time. Sometimes I go back and integrate creative stuff from the past into my current projects (for example, taking an old blog post and updating it for my current blog).

It can become a problem if you waste a lot of money on hobbies you forget about or business ideas that never get off the ground, so I’d recommend finding ways to avoid spending too much money to begin with. Ideally, it’s best to spend no money and find free activities, but obviously this is not always possible. My post about Decluttering My Fantasy Self may be relevant if this is you.

If you're multipassionate, I don't think there's one right or wrong way to manage your interests and hobbies. Some people like to focus intensely on one hobby at a time, then move on to something else. Others enjoy moving between different interests simultaneously to keep them stimulated. I've done both at different times in my life. Emilie Wapnick has a great book about this called How to Be Everything which is more focused on career, but you can apply the same principles to hobbies and side hustles as well.

[goldensunset]

first they complained that nonnumbered kh games come out on like eleven different consoles from eleven different companies thereby making it inaccessible and difficult for the average consumer to be able to play all of them (pre fm or collections) and now that the nonumbereds are releasing on a console virtually everyone has (phones) they r still mad about it. blehgh

and like y’know. tbh that isn’t a ridiculous complaint. the series has historically been inaccessible. it’s still inaccessible to me (because i personally can’t justify the financial investment of a playstation; i’ve poured everything into my switch) but like that’s my issue not theirs lol. (i mean i am mad that they kinda like acknowledged there’s a demand for kh on the switch yet made it cloud-only which is almost disrespectful and totally not gonna happen here. but like. i can get over it). i don’t see anyone out there actually complaining about kh being a playstation series like lbr that’s totally fair

BUT they’ve updated them with the all-in-one-playstation collections now! if you have a playstation there is no excuse! it’s not that hard and not that expensive! smh!!! and yeah, even with the updated collections now you do sorta miss out on some of the stuff that was removed or changed from the original versions. the mobile games only offer theater mode now. but like… it’s ok to have to go on youtube or wiki or second-hand sources to dig up old easter eggs and trivia sometimes…

and it’s ok to not have physically played every game yourself!!! like i honestly think if you take every single game up until now into account you’d be hard pressed to find a person who’s done literally everything from the console games to the handheld games to the mobile games etc themselves. like i’m sure they exist but there aren’t a lot of them. it is perfectly fine to just watch cutscenes. and if you care about the story of this series as a whole you really need to

like… i get it. it’s a video game series. one would expect to be able to play a video game instead of essentially watching a bunch of movies. that’s fair. but if you care about kingdom hearts as a franchise, whether you’re an old nostalgic vet or a newbie, doesn’t the story matter to you??? wouldn’t you do what it takes to be immersed in this world in order to fully understand the story going forward? if it’s just the gameplay you’re after like idk man i feel like you could find a similar style of gameplay as a replacement out there but idk

point is. one would have to be completely blind at this point to not realize that the mobile games are full of lore that are relevant to sora’s own journey and especially will be going forward. nomura has made it clear he’s not forgetting about sora and he’s never gonna replace him as the protagonist and heart and soul of the series. it is simply not possible to jump between numerical titles and still comprehend this stuff. this is where the series is going. there’s this thing in fiction called plot progression where some narrative threads will be resolved and left behind while new ones will be picked up. and it’s up to the author to determine this, not the nostalgia of fans. either drop the series as a whole or get on board with where it’s going

the original khχ came out like what, 10 years ago? almost half the runtime of the franchise. it is not new anymore. this is not new information. anyone who still hasn’t bothered to pay attention to that whole storyline at this point, even given all the hard work that fans have put to make it more accessible to either casuals or specifically stubborn people like that, then like. skill issue tbh.

and people complaining it’s all way too complicated? man.., find another series. i feel like it should be self-evident that this series is not known for narrative simplicity. it’s known for making everyone insane in a good way. even back in kh1 stuff was always kind of wild. everyone’s beloved kh2 is especially where we start ramping up the insanity. i fail to see how all that’s ok but the concepts of more keyblade wielders and like a lengthy timeline aren’t. after 20+ years it should be evident that things aren’t so simple and clean.

rant over *drops mic*

[lauramkaye]

Disco Elysium For Beginners

So apparently my cunning plan is working and some of my mutuals are interested in learning more about my recent obsession by playing the game Disco Elysium. Great!!! In your honor, and so that I will have more people to talk about the game with, I present to you Laura's Beginner's Guide to Playing Disco Elysium.

What Is It Even About?

Hope, despair, poverty, the human condition, politics, pinball, art, love, loss, communism, experiencing a bisexual awakening in your forties, colonization, dancing, substance use disorders, unions, mental illness, truth, trying to be a good person in a completely broken society, beauty, the end of the world, joy, complicated relationships, kindness, intersectionality, the complex and problematic nature of the profession of police detective, cryptids, juvenile delinquents, PTSD, and falling helplessly in love with Kim Kitsuragi.

Oh wait, did you mean the plot?

You play as an amnesiac detective who wakes up after an apocalyptic bender that obliterated his memories. There is a dead body hanging in a tree behind your hotel, and you are there to find out who killed him with the help of Kim Kitsuragi, a detective from another precinct who has also been put on the case and who will be your partner while you are in town. You can, as the official site puts it, "become a hero, or an absolute disaster of a human being."

Where to Get It

Disco Elysium is available for Mac and PC via Steam and for XBox and Playstation (both current and previous generation) and Nintendo Switch. The current version is "The Final Cut" which includes full voice acting. The Steam version goes on sale pretty frequently - I'd keep an eye on Black Friday/Cyber Monday sales if you're interested in picking it up. The MSRP is $40 but you can often find it for around $20 if you look for a sale - the PS4 version is $17 on Amazon right now (11/15/2022).

I'm Not Really A Gamer, Can I Still Play?

Absolutely! DE does not require any "twitchy" gameplay - you interact with the game by reading/listening to text, selecting dialogue options to talk to people, and clicking things/people to interact with them in some way. It runs very much like a tabletop RPG, where all the uncertain things are decided by skill checks and dice rolls.

Notably, DE is quite replayable even though the solution to the mystery doesn't change, because different character builds will have very different experiences and may even see completely different sidequests and dialogue. Unlike most RPGs, DE makes many checks silently, in the background, and if you don't pass the check you just don't see the relevant content and never know you missed anything. I'm on my third full and sixth partial playthrough and I still find new things.

Mechanically, playing Disco Elysium goes something like this:

Go into a new area.

Look around. You will see little colored circles appearing, either on top of items/people in the environment, or sometimes around your player character's head.

Click on the colored circles to interact with them. You will learn something, do something, or start a conversation.

Doing stuff and talking to people gives you XP! Every time you get 100 XP, you get one Skill Point. You can either use it to increase one of your skills, unlock a slot in your Thought Cabinet, or forget a Thought from your Thought Cabinet. You don't have to spend them right away; you can save them up if you want to.

Once you have clicked everything you want to click and talked to everyone you want to talk to for now, go somewhere else.

Repeat.

What the Hell is a Thought Cabinet?

As you go through the game, you will unlock "thoughts" that you can ponder. You have a certain number of slots in your "thought cabinet" where you can be mulling over an idea; you start with three slots and can unlock more up to a max of 12. Thoughts will have certain effects while you are thinking about them, which might be positive or negative. While you are still thinking them over, you can equip or unequip them at will. Each "thought project" takes a specific amount of time.

Once you have spent the designated time on a thought project, you will see the message "Breakthrough Imminent" and then you will "internalize" the thought. The thought will have effects on the gameplay, which can include skill buffs and debuffs or other effects. Once the thought is internalized, you can no longer unequip it. It will take up that slot permanently unless you spend another skill point to forget it.

So what thoughts should I internalize?

A lot of them are mainly for flavor or role-playing but a few notable ones:

Actual Art Degree gives you bonus XP when you pass a passive Conceptualization check. This is the most common passive check in the game, so AAD is the thought to take if you want to get as many skill points as possible. You unlock the thought by talking about art as much as you can.

Get Jamais Vu as early as you can on Day 1 by talking with Joyce Messier at the dock. It opens up some key dialogue options and skill checks as well as giving you bonus XP whenever you click an orb.

Ace's High or Ace's Low gives you extra Empathy bonuses towards Kim. Which you will want, because Kim is the Best.

Wompty-Dompty-Dom Centre is available starting on Day 3 and will give you $2 and some XP when you pass an Encyclopedia check.

Homo-Sexual Underground. Its only effect is to allow you to talk about sexuality with Kim. Therefore it is the most important thought in the game, because approximately 90% of players will be in love with Kim by the second in-game day.

Okay, What About Skills?

Your character "build" (strengths, weaknesses, abilities, etc.) is primarily determined by two things that you can adjust as the game progresses by spending Skill Points: Skills and Thoughts.

Skills in DE are similar to skills in other RPGs in that they determine how good you are at various things. The main difference is that instead of the more traditional skills like strength, dexterity, or charisma, DE has skills like Savoir Faire, Rhetoric, and Empathy. As befits a game that emphasizes the story and characters over combat, the skills are a lot less about how good you are at punching monsters and a lot more about the state of your character's head. The skills are broken down into four categories:

Blue or Intellect skills - brainy stuff like Logic, Rhetoric, and Encyclopedia.

Purple or Psyche skills - emotional stuff like Empathy, Volition, and Authority.

Red or Physical skills - the condition of your physical body. Endurance, Electrochemistry, and Pain Threshold live here.

Yellow or Motorics skills - how well you use your physical body. Things like Hand Eye Coordination, Perception, and Composure.

There are good descriptions of each skill in the game. At the beginning, you can choose from three predefined archetypes (Thinker, Sensitive, or Physical) or create your own by allocating 12 points between the four skill categories and picking one skill as your "signature."

What Is The Best Skill Build?

There isn't an "best" one! You can play the game equally successfully with any build, but different builds will feel very different to play, especially early in the game.

That said, I would recommend against doing a 3-3-3-3 build because it just won't be as fun. Most skills generally start to really show effects at around a 4, and failing skill checks is often funny and shouldn't lock you out of completing any checks except if you've done something really unusual.

Basically the "best" build for you is whatever is the most fun - pick something that speaks to you and go for it.

In general, Intellect builds will get a lot of worldbuilding and lore and be really good at detecting. Psyche builds will have a better sense of other people and the world and strong intuition. Physical builds tend to be able to punch their way through obstacles but aren't very smart or empathetic and struggle with following their gut instincts/cravings without thinking about it. Motorics builds will find several early-game skill checks a lot easier for them and will be good at skills like shooting, picking locks, noticing stuff, keeping cool under pressure, and talking about cars.

Some key things to consider when deciding on your character build:

Encyclopedia is the skill that gives you lore and worldbuilding information.

If you want to min-max your build to get as many skill points as possible, make sure you have good Conceptualization so you can unlock the thought Actual Art Degree.

Esprit de Corps is similar to Empathy, but it works specifically on other cops. Doing a run with high EDC helps unlock a ton of lore about many of the other key characters in the game.

Electrochemistry will try to get you to drink, smoke, have sex, and take drugs. It will also give you insights into the drinking/smoking/drugging/sex habits of others. VERY high EC will allow you to unlock a leopard-print unitard underwear option for your player character.

You have two health pools, Health and Morale. Health is affected by the Endurance skill and Morale is affected by the Volition skill. If you start a game with only 1 point in either purple or red skills, that can mean you die very easily early in the game. My first playthrough I did a high INT build and I died in the first room of the game from turning on the lights even though I had a terrible hangover. So just be aware.

Shivers is my favorite skill in the game and I'm not alone there. Shivers allows you to have a connection to your city. A lot of the best moments in the game come during Shivers checks and the writing is generally really evocative. Great for atmosphere.

My favorite skills are Esprit de Corps for character knowledge, Shivers for cool atmosphere, and Drama because Drama is just really funny.

What Else Do I Need To Know?

If you seem stuck, go somewhere else and talk to more people OR spend a skill point to level up a skill.

You can zoom in and out. My first playthrough I didn't realize this for a while and kept missing certain characters who were standing somewhere I needed to be zoomed out to see.

A lot of things that are usually part of game menus have to be unlocked. You get a map by buying it at the bookstore. You get your stats and to-do list by finding your police ledger.

Cuno seems horrible but if you gain his trust there's a lot of depth to his character. There is also a potential ending where Cuno acts as your partner during the endgame.

Do the sidequests. They are often the best stories in the game.

Don't be TOO afraid of disappointing Kim. If you avoid being racist/sexist/hurting people, he will usually come around.

That said, if you play as a terrible person he won't be your friend anymore. I don't know how people can take the emotional trauma of that, but some people do!

Save frequently, Just In Case.

Don't be too hasty to reset. Let things play out. Most of the deaths are pretty funny and sometimes you might think you died but really you didn't.

That said, it's fine to reload a save if you messed something up. It's a single player game, it isn't "cheating" to do this if you want to.

If you fail the red check at the church it is extra double okay to reload a save and make that not have happened. (This is probably one of the two highest-stakes skill checks in the game because if you succeed you get one of the best scenes in the game and if you fail you get one of the worst.)

Look at everything and talk to everyone.

I like to keep at least one unused skill point at all times in case I need to unlock a skill check I've failed once.

If you arrest someone or send the body to Processing, Kim will be gone for the rest of the day. There are some things you can only do with him and some you can only do without him, so plan accordingly.

Hope this helps and always feel free to ask if you want more help/get stuck/need hints/just want to scream about the game with me!!

[winniethewife]

Jewels made of stardust 

(Poe Dameron x OC! Rhoswen Jewelace.)

Chapter 4: I know better than to call you mine

Warning: Alcohol consumption, a Slap!

Last chapter ~ Next chapter

A/n: There’s a NSFW Part that I will post separately, totally not fully relevant to the plot. Feel free to skip! Have a good day!

Words:897

Poe sat nervously at the bar of the Cantina as he waited for Rhoswen to show up. The rest of Black Squadron already enjoying their drinks, Finn sat next to him as some form of moral support or possibly just to make sure he doesn’t do anything really stupid. At some point Poe wondered if she just said yes to get him off her back. And that’s when she walks in the door. Her normal attire switched out for something out going, a cropped green tank top that shows off her midriff, tight leggings and heels. Poe felt his jaw drop to the floor. She walked up to the bar and ordered something, a glass of Corellian Whiskey. Her emerald eyes glance over to him a slight smirk plays on her lips as she sees his astonishment. After getting her drink she approaches him.

“That surprised to see me?” She asked.

“N-no, Just wow… I’ve never seen you dressed like this.” He replies looking her up and down.

“Well I don’t go out much. Unlike some people.” She takes a sip of her whiskey as she eyes him.

To be honest she had to borrow each part of this outfit from different people because she actually doesn’t have anything that isn’t resistance issue, something of her mothers or one of her dad’s ratty jackets. But Poe didn’t need to know that. She was trying to give the full impression that she was fine, that she was doing good, that the idea of going out tonight didn’t actually nearly cause her head to explode, that she didn’t require an hour long pep talk in the mirror to get to the cantina.

For all Poe could tell however, she seemed more than fine, better than ever really. Full of spunk and sassy comebacks all night. She was even flirting with this one of the ship mechanics a girl named Myla. She was doing it mostly to piss him off. Which was working. As the night progressed it became obvious that both Poe and Rhoswen were drinking until the other left, which led to almost everyone else leaving before they did, and for the first time in a very long time. They actually sat together and talked. They were both several more drinks in then they should have been, especially for their first nice conversation in this long.

 “Do you ever wonder why this didn’t work?”

“What didn’t work Poe?”

“You know…Us?” He gestures between the two of them.

“We work…we just currently work as rivals rather than friends.”

“What if I don’t want to be rivals anymore?”

“Well I don’t particularly want to be friends.”

“We used to be.” He takes a swig of his drink

“You know why we’re not.” She takes a sip of hers.

“I…yeah.” There’s a tense silence for a moment, before he looks at her. “What if just for tonight, we forget about all of it. Just one night.”

“That sounds dangerous…”  She says with a laugh.

“Come on how bad can it be?”

Poe woke the next morning alone. As he sat up he looked around the room, no note, her clothes gone, no sign she was ever there. Should he be surprised? No. Was he mad? Most definitely. He got dressed quickly and starts to look all over the base for her. He finally tracked her down heading to the hangar.

“What the hell Red? What do you think you’re doing?” He asked as he approaches her.

“Going to the hangar? Is that against the rules now?” She asked like she didn’t have a clue what he was talking about.

“Don’t get cocky with me. This morning, you just left…did last night mean nothing to you?” He asked quietly fuming as he pulled her into a side hallway.

“You said it yourself, ‘Just for tonight’…” She pointed out

“I- yeah but… I thought… are you saying you didn’t, y’know feel a connection?” He looked like the most pathetic man in the galaxy.

“No.” She lied, but she was a good lair. He looked hurt, like she’d just run him though with a lightsaber, then he got mad again. he pushed her against the wall and crashed his lips into hers. This made her mad and she right out refused to kiss back. She pushed him off her lips.

“Get your hands off of me!” She growls, they were drawing a moderate amount of attention now.

“Are you telling me the truth?! That last night… it meant nothing? At all? Because it meant a lot to me!” he starts shouting. She manages to push him off of her.

“What? Do you need me to get it tattooed on my ass? "I had sex with Poe Dameron" I don't have time for this. Life is full of disappointment. Get used to it” She yells as she turns to storm off. He grabs her wrist.

“No I’m not doing this again, I’m not losing you again!” he feels hot tears coming to his eyes. She turns back to him and slaps him across the face as she pulls her wrist out of his grasp. “I Said, get your hands off me!” She hissed before stalking off. Poe’s hand goes for the red welt on his face.  He just can’t win this one.

~

Masterlist

Tag: @femmeanonymelives

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Those Books that Just Casually Reach into Your Chest and Tear Your Heart Out

So, as you may or may not know, I moved to Canada a few years ago, and had to leave some of my books in Alaska. Graceling and Bitterblue were two of those books, but SINCE I moved, Kristin Cashore has added two fantastic books to the series, and I wanted to talk about them today, because every single one since Graceling in 2008 has managed to just casually reach into my chest and tear my heart out.

Cashore's writing is a really fascinating balance between geopolitics and the intensely personal interior lives of her protagonists. From Katsa learning that her grace is the exact opposite of what she thought to Fire's acceptance of her heritage and actions, to Bitterblue's massive growth and Hava's recovery from just a stunning amount of trauma, these books are always a trip and always worthwhile.

Graceling came out in 2008, and it was a book I really had to sit with and read a few times, because Katsa's head was not necissarily easy to be inside--but taking the time to get there and understand her was immensely rewarding. Apparently they are also doing a Graceling graphic novel, for those of you who want to explore the story that way!

Fire is and will forever be my favorite entry in this series, which might be a bit strange because it functions more as a companion to the rest of the books--dare I say immensely relevant prequel that gets increasing nods in the subsequent books?--than a part of the main storyline. But what I will never forget about Fire is how physically present she is as a character, which was a really interesting switch from the other protaginists.

Bitterblue--it has been a lot of years since I read Bitterblue--is a masterwork in untangling and understanding the past and the true extent of the trauma that King Leck caused. I'm an English major for a reason, but Bitterblue made me appreciate math in a way that a string of increasingly desperate math teachers never, ever could.

Winterkeep expanded Cashore's world both in terms of geography and in terms of what authors can do in YA fiction now that it's not 2008 anymore (this book was released in 2021--LOTS changed in the intervening time...). This was more of an ensemble book--albeit with Bitterblue in the fore again--than the first three, and it was incredible.

Seasparrow is Hava's book, and literally everyone needs a hug. There are baby blue foxes, and everyone resolutely NOT becoming the Donner party. This book grabbed me by the heartstrings and hung on as Hava learned to forgive and to grow.

[twotangledsisters]

Are you worried that by moving over to Instagram you'll lose the community you've formed on tumblr? I've been told artists do better on tumblr than instagram due to the differences in algorithm?

Interesting question!

By community do you mean followers, mutuals? Either way... I definitely had my doubts. And I do feel bad for anybody who only follows my art on tumblr and now misses out on some pieces (I try to remember to post the linked pieces here but I do forget way too often), but overall I wouldn't say I'm scared.

I've been posting art on tumblr for well over a year and a half, meanwhile I've been on instagram for less than four months. Despite this on average art posts get better numbers on Instagram, I am well on the way to having more followers on Instagram than tumblr, and I've noticed the art tends to be relevant for at least 24 hours there, where as tumblr if it does not reach people in the first hours on tumblr it is DEAD.

Tumblr from my understanding doesn't have an algorithm, it's just organic.... my art did not thrive with tumblr. Maybe it's because my art is just not good enough and people didn't want it on their blog (understandable), maybe it's timezone related! either way, instagram has been working better for me. And the fact that there is an algorithm feels better for my mental health.

On tumblr when I spent eight hours on a drawing and it got four likes I thought 'oh my god, this art is sooooo bad, nobody likes it, I should burn it and quit trying to make art, it'll never be good enough'.

On instagram if the same happens I can just shrug and go 'guess the algorithm didn't want to show it to people'.

I know that's stupid, but if blaming the algorithm makes me feel better about my art, than I think that's good :D

Plus... I have a feed that is pretty much 100% art on instagram, most of my followers are fellow artists and I just feel really good about it.

Honestly, if you've only tried tumblr for art and it's not working for you, I definitely recommend trying instagram, I think every artists is different and thereby the ideal social media site for them is also different, but personally I am happy I switched it up.

Especially now it was leaked tumblr is just using our art to train AI.

[cybernightart]

Oc/ OC character design rant

I'm rewriting and redesigning so much of my OC's lore and designs that alot of them are essentially different people, and I'm happy about that.

And I'm at the point where one of my OCS where everything was going smoothly until I feel like I've just hit a brick wall at full speed, I have his personality I have his name I have his backstory I have everything of how we integrates in with the rest of the characters except I don't know what he looks like. I've only just realized after years I never fully settled on a design for him and was just always rapidly switching between very different looking designs.

So now I'm having to come up with a design that I like and the only things that I have to work from are:

.His name is Tyler Frost

. He/him

.He is very tall like almost 7 ft

.He has a magical healing ability that he can use to heal people's wounds and see their injuries and becomes a doctor to sort of hide the fact he has this ability while still being able to help people

. while he's really good at using his healing ability, he absolutely sucks at using the second ability which he got from his other parent, being ice magic! (a lot of ice pack related jokes get made because of this combination of healing ability and Ice ability)

. he is also really strong and likes to work out alot, he actually ends up meeting his boyfriend at the gym.

So he's kind of built like a polar bear, because he is absolutely massive and also doesn't get cold. And while he is big and cuddly he is also very dangerous when he wants to be, because who's going to mess with someone who knows where every single one of your most vulnerable places is on your body.

I know I want to give him white hair, and very light icy blue eyes but apart from that I have no idea.

For his skin tone I'm debating between two, either frosty cool white where his skin looks like snow White (his white as snow), or going along with the built like a polar bear thing, he's got really dark skin because polar bears under their white fur have really dark skin (I would have to double check exactly what colour polar bears typically have cuz I don't remember that off the top of my head)

His fashion sense is probably chaotic sleep deprived medical student ,because that's what he is during the main plot. But at the same time his fashion sense would also be crossed with like a gym bro.

So he is simultaneously the healthiest guy and the most unhealthy guy, because while he is getting a proper amount of exercise and is eating good things, he is also consuming far too much caffeine and gets little to no sleep. With the only reason he is actually eating healthy foods being since he forgets to make himself food, his boyfriend ends up making him food when he's making his own lunch. and since his boyfriend is vegetarian (due to medical reasons he physically can't eat meat) he unintentionally ends up making him vegetarian food as well.

It is so infuriating, because I have such a clear picture of him in my head but at the same time he is just a blurry unknown figure of a person, with certain features being crystal clear .

I have other OCS who have this problem, but the issue is he is a main character and the main OC while the other ones aren't so they're not as relevant and immediately needing designs. And I can't draw artwork of him and his boyfriend Jaymes together until I actually know what he looks like >:/

Thank you for coming to my tedtal- I'm mean... Rant lol