#they love their kids <33333 at least three of them

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

i am once again thinking of my little role reversal au curse user!reader…… and their dynamics with the students…..,,,. they make me insane 😔

they’re just. sooooo bitter. such a hater. they have the most insane toji-ptsd-induced beef with megumi and maki…….. it’s worst with megumi. they’re so mean to him for no reason. pulling out their biggest demon dog curse just so they can taunt him for “taking his little puppies out on a walk”……… they have that dynamic with maki too but it’s a lot more rooted in maki being a non-sorcerer in their eyes. and i think they end up rooting for her eventually…. they’ll never admit it though. but when she kills the zenin clan they’re there with the smuggest look on their face <3333

but with megumi, that sense of something almost playful isn’t there at all. they look at him and all they can think of is the scar on their neck, warm blood weighing them down, satoru’s and suguru’s half-dead bodies….. they look at him and they see toji. so they can’t help but hate him. they’re especially snarky with him just to hide how terrified they are.

the other second years are . a different story 😭 they don’t care about inumaki and panda. regularly forget they exist. rip. and i think they’re a little embarrassed to be around yuuta because he beat them LMAO…. but they also have a weird kinship going on. yuuta absolutely loathes them for hurting his friends and they’re just like :)) try me. do it. do it. you’re the same as me. JUST to piss him off…. suguru doesn’t let them be in the same room without adult supervision because otherwise they WILL be walking out with broken bones . they’re both unhinged.

but then we have nobara and yuji :(((((( who are their soft spots. yuji reminds them so much of suguru as a teen. they can’t help but love him. they want to protect him. same thing w nobara….. she reminds them of the way satoru used to be. reader is soooo protective over them both but in a kind of gruff way…. it’s really obvious that they care though!!! they want them to be safe. they want them to have a better childhood than they had. ….. although. well. i don’t think nobara likes them very much 😭 yuji is more open-minded.

and finally there’s nanako and mimiko . which is just. yeah. lots and lots and lots of bitterness from both sides <33333 nanamimi hate them for hurting suguru, and they hate nanamimi for being little brats. it’s all bark and no bite because reader wouldn’t actually hurt suguru’s precious daughters, but . like. they kinda want to sometimes 😭 they’re maybe just a little bit jealous . coming back only to find out that suguru has two daughters, that he saved them and protected them but let reader slip away……. they don’t want to acknowledge that part of it but. it’s there. and nanamimi is DOUBLE the jealousy because??? whyyy is suguru-sensei so in love with you. why does he keep loving you despite what you’ve done. why can’t he move on and meet someone else? someone better?

…. all three of them are aware that reader’s holding him back, reader included. there’s a silent understanding there. and i think it eventually develops into a mutual respect. suguru loves reader, so nanamimi grows to love them too. and reader doesn’t really get a choice in the matter when they’re so similar to their father…. sniffle. they’re found family :(((((( reader is the best/worst guardian figure ever . nanako gets a bf in the future and reader casually asks if she’d like them to kill him after they break up <3333 (which isn’t. that different from suguru’s response lmao)

I’M JUST . thinking …. about them …….. maybe one day i’ll actually write this fic instead of daydreaming about it 😭😭😭 i love my bitter reader so bad!!!

[greg-montgomery]

Reader and Aaron having a date night and Derek and Penelope babysitting? 🥰 They come back to see Penelope, Jack, and their daughter filling up Derek and doing his nails LOLOL. They all have a good laugh and when it’s brought up to the team (with pics), Derek is like “??? I’ve never seen any of you able to say no to those kids. I am no stronger than the rest of you in this”

I’LL SOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!

derek and penny spoil your kids so much like it’s a problem 😭😭 when you and aaron want to have a date night and ask them to babysit your kids they’re always more than happy <333 bc your babies are their soft spot <333

and of course jack and your little girl are just as happy bc they adore their aunt pen and their uncle derek 🥺🥺🥺🥺

the entire time you and aaron are on your date your phone hasn’t rang once and that’s bc they’re having the best time ever 🤭 so while you’re having a romantic evening with your husband derek is getting his nails painted 😭

penelope is on your kids team so it’s derek vs the three of them (he’s not complaining in the least) 🤭 jack and his little sister run to your room and go through your stuff 😭😭 so they get a pink nail polish and one of your face masks!! and they run back to the living room like “uncle derek we’re gonna make you pretty!!”

so they sit him down and get to work 😭 your girl starts painting his nails with soooo much concentration and determination 🫡 while jack opens the jar of your face mask and starts applying it on morgan’s face 🤭🤭

penelope is obviously taking pics the whole time encouraging them and telling them they’re doing such a good job 😭

when you get home you expect to find them asleep but instead you see that your living room has turned into a beauty salon 😭😭😭 aaron pulls out his phone like a true Dad and starts taking pics too 😭😭😭

the next day the team won’t let derek live this down but they all know very well they would never ever ever say no to their sweet niece and nephew 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

your babies are so so loved <33333

[icharchivist]

a happy early white day to you, icha! I’d say for your princess treatment I wrote about chikage but. let’s be truthful I did that for me. anyways tsumugi and itaru as leads… eyes emoji. this whole event was just very sweet and cute so I honestly don’t have much to say abt it, only I was thinking abt chikage during it just because. I think he’d be such a fun addition to this event due to the whole like. mildly antagonistic vibes he has with izumi. in a good way I’m not saying he’d kidnap her again I just do think like those two would probably actually snipe at each other instead of being as nice as everyone is here. or maybe he’d be just as nice as well and the contrast would be charming… who’s to say. loved muku stepping down so some random girl could get the white horse on the carousel… prince behavior. suddenly remembered that as a kid I very specifically wanted to be like… yknow how in classic shoujo setups there’s like popular prince character girl likes initially and the bad boy she eventually gives her heart to. anyways that popular prince character in general I wanted to be a shoujo prince as a kid but like unfortunately when ur like 8 acts of chivalry are really limited to just like. holding the door open for girls in your class. which I did do and wonder why I was not super popular. all this is to say I think me and muku would get along great. itaru saying work is busy because staff got shuffled around… chikage? that’s my guess abt it. the real highlight of this event tho was the tasuku tsumugi itaru dynamics it truly warmed my heart. like… the way tasuku was gonna accompany tsumugi to the amusement park the way they are supporting each other after having not been able to for so long and the way itaru after a draining days work goes with tsumugi anyways. i like to think it’s because in terms of energy tsumugi’s one of the least draining people out there. and then the way itaru says not to worry abt taxi fare and doesn’t specify anything more because like. of course tasuku will come for the two of them. the way itaru and tsumugi make up a bunch of bullshit on stage and itaru just has like, a truly great amount of fun talking about the eye of the abyss and whatever. like! he enjoys being nerdy! he enjoys acting! idk I just thought the three of em in specific were very lovely? like the way that their interactions just felt very peaceful and warm. the way tsumugi didn’t think of calling tasuku to pick them up but itaru did because he knew it would be fine. its just… nice. also my personal headcanon is citron drew one of the acting roles, said “i refuse to be a part of the monarchy!” or smthing like that and handed it over to muku bc… the role of a prince/sir or whatever, I think he’d appreciate it

omg HI KIRI <33333 It's so nice to see you, happy early white d- what with that intro i almost had a mini heart attack 😭😭😭

BUT HEY WELCOME TO ONE DAY PRINCESS! one more event down ;D

It was really nice to see Tsumugi and Itaru as lead this event, their dynamic is just so nice.

and oh god you're actually talking about Chikage hold on. hold on. Need a sec to have the brain working again. But yeah Chikage would be pretty funny in this vibe. though honestly after reading his backstages, this guy is a complete menace. "midly antagonistic vibes with Izumi" from Izumi's side maybe, the guy is laying in the most soul destroying devoted love declaration and pretends to be Izumi's boyfriend for no reason because smiling and going "well i'm joking of course. or was i.". I do NOT trust him with playing a prince being all lovey dovey with Izumi. and i would love to say "at least it's the first event since he joined so maybe he wouldn't be this bad" but then i remember he started doing those in his first backstages and i'm supposed to be normal. That said i think Chikage appears in Itaru's backstage for this event? i don't remember well. So at least he's lurking while everyone is being silly i love them.

Actually now that i think about it considering the Spring chap ends on a cliffhanger that is immediately continued in the main story, i wonder if it doesn't mean ODP is set somewhere in the middle of the Spring chapter. Which. yeah okay there you got me it would mean Chikage is prob also still antagonistic to MC and specifically not here because he heard everyone make a fuss and went nope. nope nope nope nope, without me guys, i'm here to destroy my brother not for this bullshit. I could imagine that just fine. So yeah perhaps early at that point he probably would have just be the mean bitch of the gang. Please help.

coughs sorry it was the Chikage tangeante. I'm very normal when it comes to discussing Chikage. MOVING ON.

Now, about Muku. Muku is such a sweetheart 😭 and ohmygod. Prince Kiri lore unlocked…. I don't understand how you couldn't get popular with all of this. Though ngl now it's really projecting the image of Kishima gsnk onto you. Incredible. But yes i see it now, i think you and Muku would get along so well, i love it so much.

oghhhh just seeing Chikage's name out of nowhere is making me go haywire now please help. But i could imagine that you're right yes.

Tasu/Tsumu/ita have indeed such a nice dynamic. It's also really nice to see Itaru "almost quited the company because he could never be as passionate as anyone else about theater" is out there enjoying a good day with the biggest theater addicts of the company. Feels nice feels organic. I love Tasuku having fun with them, and yeah, i agree with you, Tsumugi must be one of the least draining people out there. Must be really soothing to hang out with him just like that.

AND YEAH THE PLAY WAS SO FUN. I love how Itaru improvises to save the play. It's something that stands out to me too since, yknow, Sakuya improvising when Itaru couldn't follow the script back in RomeJuli was the reason Itaru felt supported and felt the passion for theater he ended up feeling? so to see Itaru specially save the day by improvising on stage feels like a call back to that everytime to me. Like Itaru was saved once by someone covering up for him and now he will know where to be on the look out to cover up for his troupesmates no matter what. But i genuinely love how it reflected on this play and wht can i say. Itaru living out his dream of being a hero while Tsumugi is having fun playing a corrupted evil guy is just making my heart go bonkers. Oghhhh them. The way they were so in synch about all of this is really so fun to me. Nerd boys save the day.

And i love all you bring up also about their dynamic with Tasuku in that whole time. god it's so cute, they're all so cute.

AND PLEASE for the Citron thing. I could see it, and i would definitely see him hand over the roles to Muku when he can. One stone two birds, getting rid of the icky feeling AND having Muku be happy, what's more to ask.

thank you once again as always for the throughout thoughts on the event!! it's always such a blast to live and to relive the events that way!!

So next is the Summer Main chap. :). Hope you'll have a tone of fun with that ;DDD can't wait to see your thoughts there as well.

Take care :3c

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

i saw your post about Charles and what his personality past and part in the story line so i was wondering if u could do the same for vlad? :)

Ah, well, I can at least let you know what I’ve seen so far? I haven’t delved too far into Vlad, and some of his general impressions can be confusing, so I’ll do my best to make it sensible and unbiased! Here you go lovely <33333

Fair warning, there will be mentions of a lot of JPN app content since Vlad and his boys aren’t around much in the ENG app yet.

My general sense of Vlad is basically discount vampire Sasuke Uchiha.

What I mean by this is to say–according to what I’ve read so far–his clan/family were murdered by vampire hunters in cold blood when he was just a young boy. Presumably as a result of that traumatic event, he harbors a sizable enmity towards humanity and kind of lashes out on them in weirdly specific moments of violence. Another aspect of his motivation is something that’s mentioned within Comte’s route; which is that Vlad went through the timespace door on his own one day and allegedly saw a devastated future, where nothing remains of life on earth more or less.

I guess the reason I find him to be so perplexing is that he speaks about his actions in terms of efficiency, while most of the things he does just feel like unhappy outbursts (v often a product of unresolved trauma symptoms, I’d wager.) I also say this because he appears to have no larger pattern to his fury beyond the original event of his loss. Most of the human beings he attacks aren’t much of a threat to him and hurting them really doesn’t bring him any dividends beyond revenge.

For instance, he insists his disdain for humanity and insistence on controlling them is for the sake of ensuring they do not destroy the future–the horrifying wasteland he witnessed when he traveled through the timespace door. However, I’m not really sure how his current movements really speak to that goal? I mean sure, maybe he’s relying on Faust to create an immortal human so that humans will be forced to care because it will be their future too, but he doesn’t allow Faust to draw his pureblood blood for experimenting. (One can most certainly argue this was more about a lack of trust, and perhaps for plenty reason: Faust is vindictive enough to try to turn the tables and exert control over Vlad, or act on his own whims with his findings.) But if that’s the solution he’s waiting on, turning the rivals of the men in the mansion doesn’t really bring him any closer to that vision either? I mean, what good does it do to bring back Gilles de Rais–a prominent French serial killer? How would unleashing him on the populace help humanity “realize the error of it’s short-sighted and wasteful ways” and move to a brighter future?

Can’t help it, I ask these questions as I read.

In Comte’s main story, Comte hammers home that Vlad is not somebody to be taken lightly. One day when MC goes out to buy flowers, Vlad poses as a human florist to sell them to her–which is how Comte finds out he’s in France, and that he’s made contact with MC. When prompted, Comte describes him in a very particular way; and I think people really overlook this when they talk about their relationship. He says that Vlad is frighteningly pure in terms of the way he thinks and acts. The way I understood his description (given what I’ve seen of Vlad) is that Comte really does mean it point blank: Vlad is very simple in terms of why and how he does things. The issue with this is that nuance and context are lost on Vlad as well–and that’s where the problems start to flood in. Vlad is angry at humanity for what they’ve done to him. Baseline? That’s fair, they killed his damn family. However, Vlad thinks that by extension he has the right to decimate the general public and attack people completely uninvolved in his hurt.

And that isn’t right either–it’s ignoring so many factors here. He’s ignoring how much vampires use and toy with humans as pawns, it’s ignoring the massive power imbalance between him and his victims (this really isn’t a case of self-defense most of the time, nobody but Comte/Leo is a sizable threat to him), and he’s ignoring whether or not a person even did anything to deserve his retributive violence. While murder is never okay, it is perhaps more understandable when we see Jeanne’s frenzied and violent belligerence in response to a man who murders a boy’s mother for the sake of his own amusement/convenience. Vlad literally sees almost every single one of the rivals he created begin to heal/improve and murders them in cold blood because they are no longer of any use to him. That’s uh……..that’s a little messed, not gonna lie to you chief.

While part of me understands the efficiency here–he doesn’t want to leave any traces of his involvement, he doesn’t want any loose ends–it’s also just kind of foolish and cruel ultimately. From my understanding of the narrative, all the people he turned had some visible sign that indicated their origin to Comte. So even if he claims it was for the sake of concealment, it was more likely about his personal convenience. Which…..also yikes.

[Comte clearly does not trust Vlad to be reasonable, and I think there’s plenty of good reason enumerated above, but I actually don’t sense quite so much hatred? I think he’s just given up on the idea of Vlad growing up, even if he doesn’t like giving up on people. And considering Vlad’s behavior, I think it’s overkill to say that Comte just abandons him because he doesn’t care lmao. Even when Comte expresses real anger at the end of his own route, it was more because Vlad was fine with endangering MC’s life just to get back at him. I think Comte’s unhappiness with Vlad has more to do with Vlad’s treatment of human life as meaningless and worthless. It’s fascinating but also kind of sad? Vlad’s traumatic experience results in behavior that is a direct exacerbation of Comte’s trauma, and as such--no matter their potentially fond history--they can’t stomach each other.]

In Comte’s route, Vlad also has Shakespeare abduct MC and take her to the cathedral. Later on in the castle, we see an immediate display of Vlad’s shocking powers: he has the ability to manipulate people’s desires/thoughts. I’m not exactly sure how this works, but he is able to give MC visions of the mansion and Comte coming on to her–which shocks her into realizing it’s all just a dream. It’s not reality; it’s all manufactured by Vlad.

After that...weird introductory note...Vlad gives MC the rundown on his life together with Comte, which as always is subject to a question of bias. My assumption is that he did not lie, only because he was trying to convince MC that he was “right.” Furthermore, he does not omit the most damning evidence of his erroneous judgement, which suggests a continued inability for him to see where he went wrong.

We get a series of three flashbacks. The first is them as young kids. I don’t know if Vlad had already experienced the horrors of his family being destroyed, but this particular flashback focuses on Comte. His parents, in an effort to teach him that vampires and humans have no ability to co-exist, send away all of his teachers/mentors/nannies/the servants--pretty much everyone and anyone he was closely bonded to. Think about it this way: we can see that Comte is very sociable and affectionate by nature. He was living in a house full of people, all of whom cared about him and looked after him in their own way. Now the house is entirely empty. Naturally Comte is very very upset, and Vlad appears to try to cheer him up with little success. 

[When I look back on this scene I don’t think I initially registered the sheer dissonance of Vlad’s reaction, versus Comte’s catatonic misery. There was a very solemn feeling to that memory, and the correct choice in terms of extending comfort is to hold his hand believe it or not. There is a sense that he feels very alone. When young boy Vlad enters one can argue that it was the proper thing to do; he was trying to cheer up his playmate and friend. But at the same time, I think I need to double check. Because I’m beginning to wonder if I was wrong. What if Vlad was happy to see someone as alone as him, and that joy is accordingly dissonant for that reason? He can’t see what Comte needs or how he’s hurting because he’s so glad he isn’t alone anymore in a way.]

The second flashback is the war nurse scene that I have spoken at length about. The important thing to focus on here is Vlad’s surprise that Comte would opt out of turning her out of respect for her wishes. The way Vlad frames the situation is starkly different from Comte’s. Comte sees himself as an outsider, somebody who invaded her life as a result of the timespace door and therefore has no right to suddenly change the course of her fate. He had no idea if she even wanted to live (considering the horrors she’d have to cope with and remember) or leave that time period at all, for that matter (considering the only thing keeping her going was helping the wounded/victims). Comte really was listening to everything she had to say, and he was taking her concerns and motivations seriously. 

Vlad simply says: if you want her, take her. It’s as simple as that for him. And in one way that’s not entirely wrong--assuming Comte would have every intention of looking after her and actually cares a lot about her. But what’s being ignored here is her agency and the fact that they really don’t know each other that well? Something like that could begin and be rocky, if it doesn’t end in complete disaster. Worse, I get the feeling Vlad is perfectly fine with the notion of turning her and if things don’t work out, just kill her or get rid of her. Again, the simplistic thinking comes into play here: it ultimately comes down to Vlad being self-centered. He’s thinking only in terms of satisfying his needs, he doesn’t seem to have any concept of a larger pair or group feeling. There’s an inability to bend/be flexible for the sake of maintaining a greater harmonious feeling. 

[For the record, I don’t think this makes him irredeemable? Only that it makes it very hard to live with him or love him, probably. There’s an inability to live at a joint pace? It’s always answering to what he wants without room for anything else most of the time, which to me is not living and it’s not love ;;;;]

Following their escape back to their own time, Vlad explains how he wants to use the door to turn geniuses and control humanity. He eventually wants to create a surveillance state, which would mean everyone is forced to move with his explicit approval, more or less. (He almost reminds me of Louis XIV, can’t tell if that’s what they were going for.) I have my doubts that his abilities could extend that far, but human history shows us that we are plenty susceptible to fascist and totalitarian rhetoric. In a shocking display of anger, Comte draws the line at controlling humanity and forcing them into a regime in which, and this is Vlad’s description not mine, “we (purebloods) would be like kings.” There’s definitely a concept of evolutionary superiority at play here, which echoes what I mentioned earlier; vampires seem to have this awareness that they’re apex predators in a sense, and enjoy the power that comes with that. Unfortunately, that probably makes for a fairly toxic/uncomfortable larger species culture, which is exactly what Comte and Leo hate lmao.

Vlad does not seem to find any issue with this sort of outlook, and asks MC to decide which of them--Vlad or Comte--is right. Who is more realistic, who best understands the future? As expected the MC replies that it's Comte, and Vlad goes from beseeching to big mad at record speed. He's p much that gif of the teddy bear that smacks its head down on the tables and then has the angry eyebrows.

This is where Comte intervenes, firing a warning shot that grazes Vlad's cheek and demanding he let MC go. In response, Vlad shoves MC into the turbulent timespace door--p much guaranteeing MC's death. (Essentially timespace is a void of sorts, a human being could never survive in that environment for long. Vlad fully knew this, and yeeted her anyway.)

So uh, yeah. Disagreement? Death. Moving on? Death. Nuanced approach to reality? Death. Beginning to think he doesn't really have a lot of patience or open-mindedness or any other kind of problem-solving approach. 

He raises flowers and gardens like a fiend, and he openly plucks any single flower with a blemished leaf. Even if a single petal is slightly damaged, it will be removed and destroyed. So one could argue his extremism reflects a kind of perfectionism as well. No room for errors or troublesome dissent. No ugliness of any kind. I mean in all of his interactions with Faust and Charles this is the overt undertone. Don't ask more of me than I'm willing to give. Behave like good children, mommy's busy. Is that insubordination? boss music begins

One thing I actually don't understand very well is his decision making in Dazai's route. Dazai finds out about what Vlad's doing in a nanosecond when he senses MC is in danger, and yet Vlad makes absolutely no move to eliminate Dazai? He just watches from the shadows. Even when Dazai grills Charles about his loyalty to Vlad, no retribution.

My best guess for this specific situation is that Vlad does derive some level of satisfaction thwarting the future of human beings/former humans. Dazai--being somebody with no great desire to live, no rivals to speak of as far as we can tell, and no larger aspirations--is a life that is easily extinguished. There's no satisfaction in it. When Vlad's clan was murdered and he saw the future decimated, it could be that he felt humans had invaded and eradicated every potentiality that was important to him. Where he might have lived happily with his family, that future was ripped from his grasp. Where he might enjoy his flowers and the creation of an immortal for the rest of conceivable time, that too was ripped from his grasp with a desolate future. 

So much about who Vlad is is about control, so it's very possible his lashing out is an extension of that. Dazai does not awaken any of the disdain he feels, and he does not succeed in overthrowing Vlad's control over Charles, so Vlad simply lurks in silence.

And last but not least, I've seen the preview to Vlad's newest birthday event story. The contents are incredibly revealing, in that MC wishing him a happy birthday and offering him a gift has him saying that it was "the best birthday ever." Granted idk if that’s sweet or just...beyond sad, but here we are. It’s only compounding my curiosity about the wound on his chest--I really do wonder if he was attacked and locked away by vampire hunters or hostile human beings or something. I say that only because that line speaks to a lot of isolation, and given how little he seems to care about turning people/subjecting them to his whims it feels odd. Why the isolation or lack of people who care about him? Is it a perceived lack where his actions alienated all the people who wanted to be close to him, or is it a more involuntary lack?

When she says let’s celebrate again next year, he seems a pleasantly shocked by the notion, and remarks “Ah yes, it’s a promise c:”. The preview was also mega horny: “You make me feel so loved, I don’t think I can be gentle with you tonight. If you enjoy it so much, then I won’t stop. I want to see you completely lost for me. I’ll teach your body what it means to be loved by a pureblood.” Aaaaaand pretty sure the CG was alluding to him licking the good stuff from her basement, though not entirely sure given it was only the preview. 

The brief POV they give us is also very revealing:

“You always keep your promises, and I think I underestimate all the time how much you saved me. You are good, only you are good in this world.”

“Will we continue to make promises to each other in the future? Well in that case--you will always, always be mine, my vampire.”

Tbh he’s...v sweet? In his own way? Honestly he feels like a crabapple that is just so sick of the world and wants softe wife to take comfort in. While granted that’s not really my thing, I know a fanbase appeal exists for these types--so if that’s your thing, have at it!

So now that we have reached the end of my ridiculously long analysis (when am I ever brief, I’m so sorry. If you made it all the way here you deserve a cookie at the very least, if not the right to chase me with a bat) perhaps it’s more clear why I said discount vampire Sasuke Uchiha? “My clan is gone, every other second I’m going to be in retraumatization insanity, when I’m not I’ll be seeking power/hobbies, planning the demise of people who wanted the best for me, building a team to my advantage and unquestioned control, and eventually settling for a lifelong love who sees the best in me despite my more difficult moments and perceived hollowing loneliness. Not the most ideal comparison, but I will say if Vlad was not already named the historical figure, would have pointed and yelled Uchiha.

That’s all from me folks, hopefully this was a fun way to get introduced to him? And again, hope I didn’t alienate--I fully respect what people do and don’t enjoy o7

[seblore]

everyday i wake up and you still havent posted your evermore rant </3

there u go boo 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

GDBDNSKDJHHDDNDS GIRL................ ok so i very cleverly avoided ranking folklore because every song REALLY HIT and the whole album was just SO.. SO.. yeah. i can however rank miss evermore. i dont want to compare the two album i do not get the point in that. both give off really different vibes. now what i will say is with folklore, AS AN ALBUM, it is just a master masterpiece. The songs flowed amazingly with each other and really held you close the entire first listen. at least thats what I felt like <3 with evermore however, the individual songs are OMG!!! THERE IS LITERALLY NO SONG I DONT LIKE FROM ANY OF THE TWO ALBUMS. but as an album on the first listen i did feel a bit disconnected from evermore which didnt happen to me with folklore. why i think that might’ve happened is BECAUSE taylor is just so brilliant m8.... the MASSIVE contrasting emotions between the songs was too much for my little brain to handle.

Ok so now that’s out of the way dhsjsk time for rankings :) i have no idea where im going to put each song im just going to make it up as we go <3 ill ALSO give you my fave lyrics from each if I remember it <333 (oh and also you’ll notice marjorie isnt here. im sorry but i never listened to it after the first listen because it hits a little too close to home and i dont want to unpack all of that now im sorry! it is a beautiful song)

14. Closure: she popped off <3 she really said dont treat me like a situation that needs to be handled 💃🤙💯 a beautiful song with beautiful lyrics HOWEVER its the first song i couldnt connect with thus it’s down here BUT I STILL WOULD LISTEN TO IT ON REPEAT THO... the last in my ranking but still fucks 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ thats taylor swift 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

13. long story short: i have never been in a relationship ever BUT GODDAMN ‘pushed from the precipice, clung to the nearest lips’ hdjsksksjjddjnBbdns jddd ubebs!:!?:?:$3&39383$hzjs WOAH.... and this bitch really summarized the full 2016 drama with long story short it was a bad time. HILARITY. yeah not much to say here tho this is just the ‘at least one mandatory song to shake your tits to on each ts album’ song of evermore <3 and always remember that if the shoe fits walk in it TILL YOUR HIGH HEELS BREAK WOOH ANDIFELLDOWNTHEPEDESTALRIGHTDOWNTHERA—

12: dorothea: making a lark of misery :D RENt free. i had to listen to ‘if youre tired of being known for who you know you know youll always know me’ 113 times to finally understand it tho 😐 some of us are stupid and illiterate have you ever thought about that miss swift???? anyways TINGTINGTINGINGINGING THE STARS IN YOUR EYES SHINED BRIGHTER IN TUPELO <33333 such an innocent feel good song I LOVE!!!!!

11. ivy: the goddamn here and the hush of mirrorball ARE THE REASON IM STILL ALIVE 😽 another lyrical masterclass <3 ‘id live and die for moments that we stole on begged and borrowed time’ IS2G!!!!!!!!!!! anyways what if you cheated on your husband with me and i cheated on my husband with you and my pain fit in the palm of your freezing hands 😳 JK JK 😅 unless...... 🤪😏 hdjsks yeah this song is magnificently cursed and i am in love with it 🧎‍♀️

10. tis the damn season: this song is august but the other side of the coin. august but four months later. AUGUST SLIPPED AWAY LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE- THE HOLIDAYS LINGER LIKE A BAD PERFUMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE... she sounds so pretty goshhh! ‘time flies messy as the mud on your truck tires NOW IM MISSING YOUR SMILE hear me out we could just ride around and the road not taken looks real good now’ is on repeat in my mind. and as always the bridge ::::::::::::::.............:::::::::::::: how does she do this everytime. ‘and wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles im faking’ 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ after every ts song i listen my expectations about true love grows exponentially and my chances of finding true love falls exponentially simultaneously ADIEU.

9. willow: she really took the invisible string quartet and put it in huh..................... FUCKED IN THE HEADDDDDDDDDDDDDD. what can i say <3 its just such a pretty song <3 hashtag gorgeous hashtag i cant say anything to its face. WRECK MY PLANS!!!!!! WRECK IT BITCH!!! ‘wait for the signal and ill meet you after dark’ LOVE STORY WHIPLASH. also mate i cant even focus on the song she looks SO GOOD in the music video i—

8. happiness: !!!! what can i say.... one of the best songs of the album hands down. lyrical masterpiece AND musically rich. she really logged into tumblr dot com and typed out ‘THERE’LL BE HAPPINESS AFTER YOU’ AND ‘THERE WAS HAPPINESS BECAUSE OF YOU’ ARE IDEAS THAT CAN COEXIST and logged off...... h8 her and her insanity. the one word i have to describe this song is: picturesque. tis a picturesque song <3 oh and dfbhhffcbhDDVHHTRSDVJK when i heard ‘i hope she’ll be a beautiful fool who takes my spot next to you’ i audibly GASPED and then she says ‘no i didnt mean that sorry i cant see facts through all of my fury’................. i fell out of my chair. IT FELT LIKE AS IF SHE HEARD MY GASP AND TOLD ME SPECIFICALLY THAT NO SHE DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT... anyways yeah. ill write an article one day named THE SWIFT DECEPTION OF TAYLOR about how she keeps writing songs with deceptive titles and this will be the opening case 😈🤙 also the fact that this is one of my faves and i put it in number 8 says a lot......

7. evermore: i havent recovered from ‘motion capture. put me in a bad light’. i mean come on the whole goddamn song is a lyrical masterpiece. ‘writing letters addressed to the fire’. IS SHE OK!????????????? i think tf not. beautiful song beautiful arrangement. iver sounded really good too. and lol lol rofl WOOFWOOFbarkbark ‘HEY DECEMBER GUESS IM FEELING UNMOORED’ unmoored definition from google dot com: no longer attached. she doesn’t go back to december anymore. about2 faint oml. long story short: i did not survive. THIS PAIN WOULD BE FOR EVERMORE........ what i felt with this song is that she took the quarantine sadness we all felt at least once this year and made it into a masterpiece of a song. couldve been easily the top song on any album except this. no i will not elaborate <3

6. no body no crime: i cannot believe. she teased us with a musical number. this woman teased us with. a musical number. I THINK SHE IS WRITING A MUSICAL BUT I JUST CANT PROVE IT! when she wins that tony 16 years later call me prophetic xoxo. anyways yeah she literally wrote this to flex her storytelling abilities. send tweet 🐥

5. cowboy like me: YEEEHAWWW I’LL BE HONEST WITH YOU I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT THE FULL SONG SOUNDS LIKE I JUST HAVE THE BRIDGE ON REPEAT!!!! OMFG!!! the skeletons in both our closets plotted hard to fuck this up. AAAA!! ??? STFU. IM NOT EVEN TALKING ABOUT THE LYRICS MATE THE WAY ITS SUNG!!!!!!! GUT WRENCHING! the best bridge she has ever written musically. i cant stop listening to it. REALLYYY DID BELIEEEVE I WAS THE ONEEE. STORIESSS ABOUT WHEEEN YOU PASSSEDDD THROUGHH TOWN. y e l l. and then she hits me with ‘now you hang from my lips like the gardens of babylon.’ L ???? M !!!!! A $$$$$ O “”””” i had to pause it and sit there for 10 minutes to take in what i had just heard. case closed critical hit sustained yeedhawd.

4. tolerate it: i cried. the only reason it’s not 1 is because it hurt me too much. WHAT THE FUCK YOU MF YOU ASSUME IM FINE BUT WYD IF I BREAK FREE AND LEAVE US IN THE RUINS???? TOOK THIS DAGGER IN ME AND REMOV— m8 this physically hurts me everytime. if its all in my head TELL ME RN. aghhh aRghhhhhhh. pain. and lol she broke down sleep to its bare essentials ‘breathing with your eyes closed’.

3. ??? coney island: i know it’s a bit of a controversial top three but WHO CARES 🕴this is solely here for ‘AND IM SITTING ON A BENCH IN CONEY ISLAND wondering where did my BABYy GO’ im shaking. my bed is shaking. my body is shaking. my pupils are shaking. THE WAY SHE SINGS IT OH MY GOODNESS ME i have to lie down gimme a sec. ‘and if this is the long haul howd we get here so soon 😟’ SCREAM. and when i was hearing it for the first time and she said ‘sorry for not making you my centerfold’ i was like yeah and?? so what?? and then she hits me with ‘over and over’...... so she didnt make him/her/them her centerfold over and over !!!!!!! she is sorry she didnt do it over and over!!!!!! mannn.... the chorus.. i shall not speak. i am held at gunpoint i CANNOT SPEAK. the bridge tho dhdnsksksjsb I CAN SPEAK AND I SHALL SPEAK. BITCH WENT OFFFFFFFF. <3 this is the apology she deserved from her exes which she never got so she wrote it herself. podium. grey skies. birthday cake. ACCIDENT. im laughingggggggggggg <///3 and yeah so overall it is a really yummy song with yummy vocals and yummy arrangement 9/10 would recommend. also!! life lessons kids life lessons. disappointments? SIMPLY CLOSE YOUR EYES AND PRETEND YOU DO NOT SEE IT YAAAAAAAAAS

2. gold rush: ETHEREAL!!!!!! The last time i felt like this™️ whilst listening to a song was with mirrorball <3 the production of this song omg omg omg LOVE 💃 but what propelled it to number two status was the ‘i dont like slow motion double vision in ROSE BLUSH/ i dont like that falling feels like flying till the BONE CRUSH’ imagine how fucked in the head a person needs to be to rhyme rose blush with bone crush. yeah i have nothing more to say really this song is extremely gorgeous and ‘eyes like sinking ships on water so inviting i almost jumped in’ / ‘walk past quick brush’ ?:!:!&:8483 F A V E <33333 and the transition transmission transfusion from ‘... gray old tea cuz itll never be ᵍˡᵉᵃᵃᵃᵃᵐⁱⁿᵍ ᵗʷⁱⁿᵏˡⁱⁿᵍᵍᵍᵍ’ MADAME

1. champagne problems: are we surprised? ARE WE REALLY SURPRISED? when listening to new albums i normally listen to it at one go in order. i stick to that rule. HOWEVER after many years of my solid album listening self made rule tm i finally broke and immediately replayed this mf song after listening to it once. ‘you had a speech, youre speechless/ love slipped beyond your reaches’???? stfu???? VILE. PUNISHABLE. DEROGATORY. and welp the entire bridge ...... .... ........... what can i say. And the parallels to miss all too well??? WHAT WAS THE REASON???? your SISTER splashed out on the bottle- left my scarf there at your SISTER’s house 😐 she’ll patch up your tapestry that i SHRED- maybe this thing was a masterpiece till you TORE it all up 😐 your MOM’s ring in your pocket- your MOTHER’s telling stories bout you on the tee ball team 😐 November flush and your FLANNEL cure- PLAID shirt days and nights when you made me your own 😐 wHAT A SHAME SHE IS FUCKED IN THE HEAD IS2G........... and also why would she not rhyme POCKET with LOCKET?????? why with wallet???????????? slant rhyme why????????????? AND THE NOTE THIS MF SONG ENDS ON..... FUCKED IN THE HEAD

THATS IT. i really sat here and did this for the past 2 hours huh...... hhdjsms anyways LONG STORY SHORT: I HATE ONE INSANE WOMAN AND HER NAME IS TAYLOR ALISON SWIFT. GODSPEEED 🏃‍♀️

[kakashibestie]

tagged by my friend @hardfeelingsbylorde​ ty <33333

rules: when you get tagged, it means someone wants to know more about you, so list 5 things about yourself you want your followers to know! they can be as simple as your age or as complex as your deepest fear, as long as it’s something you’re comfortable with sharing. when you’re done and if you want to, tag 10 people you want to get to know better.

i can sing!!! ive been told im a mezzo but my voice is pretty high pitched to begin with and singing deep notes is super uncomfortable to me so maybe....im not a mezzo after all! i took lessons back when i was in middle school but after that i got lazy and stopped learning sgksdfh so obviously my technique is rusty to say the least, but my singing’s still good enough to dazzle both strangers and friends alike at karaoke...

i went to england on a school trip back in 2013 (the event was called british english olympics sdfjkhfgjksdf) and whenever i look back on it i swear it was a fever dream...so. much. happened on that trip that it’s hard to pick just One Thing to share...but i think i’ll go with the russians...there was only One (1) school from russia in the entire competition and it was this gang of like five kids all super tall and funny looking and one of them was called Oleg Smirnoff (this isnt a joke that was his actual name and one of my friends back then got a crush on him sdjkghjksdhf) and once they almost got kicked out of the competition because apparently they sneaked some alcohol into the dorms without anybody knowing...we were all...middle schoolers...and i recall...mentions of an incident involving them, vodka, a bathtub and oil of some sort???????? memories from that trip become ever blurrier as i grow up but i’ll never forget how no student in my group was brave enough to ask about the bathtub incident.

i’ve only injured myself badly like three times all my life and all have been incredibly stupid and avoidable injuries. once when i was 11, i was too busy staring at the sunset to remember my car was a chrysler town and country with sliding doors and my sister just...slammed the door shut without realizing my hand was there so my thumb got crushed by it but surprisingly no bones actually broke? the second one happened in soccer practice when i was 14. i got impatient and wanted to shoot the ball to score because the net was right! there! in! front! of! me! and i didnt give a shit about the drill, my teammates started yelling at me to return the ball because that’s...what i was supposed to do but i was already speeding up to just score by myself and when i turned to kick the ball back to my teammate i accidentally tripped on it instead of just...kicking it and ended up landing on my wrist :) it cracked and there was a lump the size of a tennis ball on it by the time i got to the er....apparently it didnt recover well even though i had it in a cast for a month and now i have carpal tunnel! the third one happened when i was 18...i was leaving the bathroom at my workplace with a friend and ive always been one to walk rather Too Quickly and also quite...mindlessly sometimes. so i forgot there was a corridor i had to go through before going back to my desk and when i took the turn my whole body...especially my FACE slammed straight into one of the corridor walls. everything was black for a moment and then there was a sharp stinging pain coming from my nose. to my surprise, it wasn’t bleeding, but it was swollen n bruised for at least a week after it happened and i havent been able to breathe properly ever since....so maybe i DID break it after all.

i love quantum theory and...astrophysics in general and it’s v funny because i understand most equations and concepts and i just...love deep diving into them but i can’t explain them properly for the life of me and i also can’t do basic math :)

my banana bread is the most delicious thing ever and im v looking forward to the next time i have the chance to make it

IM TAGGING LITERALLY ANYONE WHO ACTUALLY TOOK THE TIME TO READ THROUGH THIS <3

[babbushka]

Hi Zannah!! I just wanted to tell you how much I love your writing! You're amazing, keep up the good work! Although I have a huge question for you (don't be scared haha)! I'm a muslim girl and I'm very interested in the Jewish religion. Can you tell me more about your life as a Jewish woman? How is it? You're probably going to tell me to Google it but I want to hear it from someone who practice it! Take your time to answer! I love you sister

Hi! Thank you so much for your kind words about my writing!

I’m afraid that I’m going to disappoint you with this answer, because first and foremost I feel I need to make the distinction that I don’t very heavily or actively practice the Jewish religion in the traditional sense. I don’t go to temple or keep the Sabbath, I didn’t have a bat mitzvah, I didn’t go to Hebrew school, and I don’t keep kosher. 

I’m what’s called an Ethnic Jew, that is someone who has a Jewish lineage, as opposed to someone who actively practices the religion of Judaism. These things are not mutually exclusive! I know it’s an unusual concept, but a person can have full Jewish lineage and not practice the religion at all, in the same way that someone can become Jewish by conversion and have not a single drop of Jewish blood in their bodies. 

I am the former, someone who has heavy Jewish lineage (my maternal line is Jewish as back as we have record), but because my mother wanted to assimilate me and my brother, we were not raised actively practicing Judaism. My grandmother was understandably not pleased with this at all, and so she took me to temple as a young child and we celebrated all the holidays together, but as an adult, I have a lot of differing opinions on G-d and if one really exists and all that, so I don’t follow the religious teachings anymore. 

However, I am ethnically Jewish, so I grew up around other Jewish people and the Jewish culture. The food, the language, the music, the holidays, the traditions, are all a very large part of my life. I just don’t go to temple and my Hebrew is very poor lol (I speak more Yiddish than Hebrew but even my Yiddish isn’t that fluent since my immediate family doesn’t speak it). I may not follow the religious teachings, but I follow the ethical and moral ones, and I celebrate my family’s heritage and my culture. 

So to answer your question of what’s my life like as a Jewish woman, I’m afraid that there’s not much about me being Jewish that specifically impacts my daily life in any particular way, aside from the constant harassment I get when I go to certain areas. I wear a Magen David around my neck which visibly marks me as Jewish and that is something I am very proud of -- but it does unfortunately draw negative attention from people who do not like Jewish people. But I feel that, unfortunately, all marginalized people are subject to that possibility of harassment, that’s not something specific to being Jewish. 

But other than that, there are just the normal pressures to do well that I feel every family puts on their children. Do well in school, do well in life, become a big shot as a doctor or a lawyer, and then disappoint everyone when you decide to become an artist lmao. Go to weddings, sit shiva for funerals. Make good choices and get married yourself and have lots of kids and raise them Jewish lol. 

I love my life as a Jewish woman so so much. I love listening to my families stories, I love listening to our personal history. I love telling Jewish jokes because the humor is very specific to us and I genuinely find all of it so funny. I complain all the time, and loudly, because dammit I’ve earned the right to lol. I love lox bagels and matzo ball soup and Hanukkah is my favorite holiday. I sing Yiddish songs while I clean the house and I eat apples and honey for the Jewish new year -- but I am not by any means Orthodox.

I follow the ethical teachings, things like kindness above all else, compassion for others, peace for the sake of peace and also for self-preservation, but also fighting for what you know to be right. One of our most well known Rabbis, a man named Hillel has many teachings which I live my life by, things like, “That which is hateful to you, do not do to another. That is the whole Law. The rest is commentary.” and “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am not for others, what am I? And if not now, when?” 

Another very well known Rabbi, a man named Simeon ben Gamliel has a quote I like very much that sums up my Jewish approach, “The world rests on three things: justice, truth, and peace.”

I hope I’ve answered your question somehow, some way. I hope that I haven’t disappointed you by revealing that I’m technically not a very good, practicing Jewish person, lol, but I think one of the beautiful things about the day and age we live in is that we can take our heritage and celebrate the parts we agree with, evolve or ignore the parts we don’t, all while maintaining those core tenants which make our culture so strong. I don’t think that’s specific to Judiasm and Jewishness, but it certainly is something that’s very prevalent in the Jewish community (at least in my experience, again I can’t speak for anyone else!)  

I am sending you all my love my dear friend, I hope you’re doing well and having a lovely day or evening, wherever you are

[queerdiaz]

A Very Camsten Christmas

A/N: MERRY (belated) CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR TO MY WONDERUFL FRIEND @xoheatherkw! I was your Secret Santa for the @stitcherssecretsanta2018​ and I’m sooo beyond happy that I was bc you are one of my oldest friends on here and in the Stitchers fam. I hope you have a very magical year full of happiness and growth! I’m sorry this is late but I hope you enjoy this little gift! ILYSFM HONEY<33333

For the millionth time that day, a cough escaped Cameron’s throat, making him feel worse than he already did. This was the worse day of his life. Okay, maybe not the worse because he’s had his fair share of days that were just flat a… doozy. Like those days when he had almost died. But most were when Kirsten had lost her memory. So he did technically did had it worse, but this...this had to be up there. Cameron Goodkin had prided himself in being very healthy and clean. Some would call him “neurotic” or “OCD” or “clean freak that needs to chill”-the last one being from Camille. But he had rarely been sick, so jokes were on them. 

He then sneezed for the 34th time. (He wasn’t counting or anything).

Okay, fine. The joke was technically on him now, he guessed. Damn his weak immune system. Because of his heart condition he had as a kid, Cameron could easily get ill. For most people they’d just get a cold or sinus infection, sometime the flu. But for Cameron he’d get not only the bad case of the flu, but a slew of other things. As a kid he went to the hospital a lot, even after his heart surgery. So as he got older, he became cleaner and cleaner to the point to where anything unclean freaked him out. It would just remind him of those dark days that he tried not to remember as he got older.

That all changed, however, when Cameron met Kirsten. (Like everything else in his life. For the better.)

He had known pretty quickly that he was in love with her. How could he not though? She was smart, beautiful, brave, and so, so much more. And caring. Even when she had her Temporal Dysplasia, where it was hard for her to have emotions, Cameron could tell she cared. And it always tugged at his heart every time she got so passionate about the person she was stitching, feeling what they had felt. To this day it still amazed him. She amazed him. And she had also inspired him to be brave. Which was why on that day during the first year they had known each other, he conquered his fear of dying and stabbed himself with that fateful syringe.

Now, four years later, Cameron could handle hospitals again. Being in the Stitchers program you kinda had to get used to them. Now did Cameron still hate hospitals and being sick and injured still? Frack yes. And he sure as hell hated his latest visit the day prior. Being stuck there for two days was no fun. (He’d much rather deal with crazy murder investigations and government conspiracies.) However, now he was at home with the love of his life, still feeling like the trash in the Deathstar’s garbage compactor, but at least he was home with Kirsten. Cameron had realized pretty early on that as long as he had Kirsten, he could handle anything.

Cameron just wished that he didn’t have to be sick on Christmas. Mostly for Kirsten. Since Kirsten had reunited with her mom and got all her memories back, she had discovered that Christmas was her family’s favorite time of year. She had kept on smiling the more she told Cameron all the fun stories. This was her first Christmas with her mom and Kirsten had been determined to make it the best Christmas, which surprised everyone except for Cameron. It had been hard getting used to having her mom in her life and it seemed like they bonded the most when they reminisced on those happy memories. So of course Kirsten wanted to recreate them again. And so they went all out. Kirsten decorated both hers and Cameron’s places, even buying two trees. Cameron was more of Hanukkah man himself since his best memories were celebrating it every night with his grandmother, but he wanted Kirsten feel the happiest she had ever been so he enjoyed doing those traditions with her. So much so that he decided to give her a big Christmas present.

But now, on Christmas Day itself, it all was ruined because his immune system was the worst.

A knock then came at his bedroom’s opened door, making him lift his head to see Kirsten walking in holding a tray. “Hey babe, I got you soup and hot lemon water just as you like it.” She announced with a bright smile.

Cameron just grumbled, sinking further into his bed. “Why are you smiling? Christmas is ruined. I ruined Christmas!”

Kirsten rolled her eyes, walking over to him, placing the tray on his nightstand, and took a seat on the edge of the bed. “Stop, being a baby, Baby. Christmas is not ruined.”

“But this was your first Christmas with your mom again. It was important.”

“It is important. Which was why Mom stopped by while you were asleep, bringing us food and presents. She stayed for a bit and we reminisced. It was nice.” She said with a soft smile. Her eyes then lit up. “Oh! And she gave me this.” Kirsten then grabbed what looked to be a locket around her neck and showed it to him. He sat to get a better look. She then opened it to reveal to pictures. One side was an older picture of a young Kirsten standing between her two parents in front of a Christmas tree, smiles on all of their faces. On the side of the locket was a newer photo, one Cameron recognized. It was of them two standing in the middle dressed as Betty and Jughead with the Stitchers family surrounding them at Camille’s Halloween party this past year. “It’s of my two families. Old and new.”

“It’s beautiful.” He whispered, heart tugging on the fact that both Kirsten and her mom saw that he and the Stitchers crew were also her family and just as important. Cameron then sighed. “Kirsten, you don’t have be here the entire day. You’ve been at my side for the past three days. You should go be with your family other than me today. I’ll be fine.”

“Hey.” Kirsten then placed both her hands on his shoulders. “Listen to me. Cameron Goodkin, you are my family also. There’s no other place I’d rather be than by your side.”

Cameron hitched his breath, chest tightening at her words. “But...Christmas.”

She shook her head with an amused smile on her face, “Cameron, this entire Christmas season has been the best. I’ve got to spend it with my mom again. My mom. But also I got to spent with you and my new family. We went ice skating, decorated together, and I got to bake gingerbread with my mom. We even got to have Christmas party with everyone there. I swear I was living a freaking Hallmark Christmas movie or something.”

They both chuckled.

Cameron then rubbed his thumb on Kirsten’s shoulder. “So you really don’t mind taking care of me on Christmas day?”

She shook her head. “Absolutely not. Wanna know why?”

“Why?”

“When I saw you sleeping in the hospital room, I was immediately reminded of when you almost died trying to help me. That was one of  the most terrified moments of my life, Cameron. And it still haunts me to this day. So seeing you in the same hospital, I was so worried. But then last night when they said that you could go home just in time for Christmas, I was beyond relieved. And now I get to spend the holiday with the man I love, even if you’re in bed rest. Because, no matter where you are, I want to be there with you.. Besides, isn’t Christmas supposed to be about love, happiness, and home? Cameron Goodkin, you are all of that to me.”

Cameron just stared at her, so filled with love he couldn’t take it.

After he didn’t respond, Kirsten turned her head away. “That was lame, I know.”

“No!” He exclaimed. He then touched her cheek and pulled her head back toward him. Her beautiful eyes met his. “Kirsten, you amaze me every day of my life. I am never bored with you at your side and you make me the happiest I have ever been in my life.” The words then flew out before he could think. “Kirsten, will you marry me?”

Her eyes widened in shock. “What?” She breathed out.

For a parsec of a moment, Cameron had the thought to quickly pretend that he was just messing with her or something. But no. He was always brave with her and so he would be the bravest he had ever been.

Cameron then took both of Kirsten’s within hers, taking a breath before releasing it, and then said, “This isn’t how I planned to do this, but in our line of work things rarely go as planned. Why is this any different, amiright?” He then laughed nervously before clearing his throat and continuing. “Kirsten, you know how much I love you. I’ve loved you since you told me “Blue Door Sepulveda” and then called me Julie before giving me the best kiss I ever had prior to that moment. Even though it was still weird since you didn’t remember for a while.”

This made Kirsten laugh, tears falling down her face. He then moved his left hand away from hers and lifted it to wipe the tears away.

He continued, “I’ve always loved you. No matter what you were going through or feeling or not feeling. My love for you just grew and grew. And it continues to grow everyday. Kirsten, when you lost your memories of me I…” He swallowed then grabbed her hand he was still holding and placed it on top of his heart before continuing, “My heart didn’t just hurt. It felt hollow. And so when you remembered me, remembered us again, I was so incredibly happy that on a whim I bought you a ring. But we were just getting back together and you were getting to know your mom, so I decided to wait for a while. And then when I saw how happy the Holidays made you, I decided that Christmas would be perfect. And even though my plans for it changed and I right now I feel like I’m dying, I can’t wait any longer.” Then with his free hand, Cameron reached into his pajama pocket and grabbed the small, velvet box, pulling it out. He then opened to it to reveal a diamond ring with sapphire stones on the side. “ Kirsten Clark Stinger, will you be the Leia to my Han and marry me?”

“Yes!” She then rushed to kiss him, but he moved away from her.

“I don’t want to get you sick.”

Kirsten then gave him a deathly glare. “Cameron, if you don’t let me kiss you I swear-”

But before she could finish, Cameron placed his lips against on hers.

It probably wasn’t technically one of their best kisses since his lips were chapped and he was sweating, but to Cameron this was the best kiss he had ever had. After the best moments of his life, they slightly parted until their foreheads were against each other.

Kirsten then gave him the brightest smile he had ever seen. “Best. Christmas. Ever.”

Cameron laughed and then kissed her again. He took his earlier sentiments back. Instead of the worst day of his life, this was the best day of his life and he planned to have many more of them with Kirsten.

[howling--fantods]

i was tagged by @parkliferobyn THANK YOU!!! <33333 i’m gonna leave out the big 3 (blur [including gorillaz and graham], u2, bruce) bc i feel like you all know the answers anyways :)

Rules: List ten bands that you like and then answer the following questions. 

1. Happy Mondays/Black Grape 2. The Fall 3. Pavement 4. Noel Gallagher 5. The Replacements 6. The Jesus & Mary Chain 7. Echo & The Bunnymen 8. Kraftwerk 9. The Wedding Present 10. The Chameleons

Questions:

What’s the first song you heard by 6? (The Jesus & Mary Chain) I think the first song I heard and consciously knew was them was probably “Sidewalking” bc John Peel played it a lot, but I am sure I had heard “Just Like Honey” before that. It honestly might have been their cover of “My Girl” bc I heard that on John Peel too.

What’s your favourite song by 8? (Kraftwerk)  I have been in love with “Europe Endless” since the moment I heard it, and it will always be special to me bc of Ellis. Also “Franz Schubert” is gorgeous and I’m currently in love with “Ohm Sweet Ohm.”

What kind of impact has 1 had on you? (Happy Mondays/Black Grape) I actually think they had a huge impact on me subliminally. When I worked at Starbucks, one of our regulars, Louis, also loved U2 and I would burn him copies of all the remastered U2 albums and he would burn me CDs of bands he loved in high school in the 80s, which included the Waterboys, Joy Division, the Stone Roses, the Wonder Stuff, and Happy Mondays. At that time I pretty much only listened to Bruce and U2. I was immediately intrigued by Happy Mondays bc they sounded so unlike anything I’d heard and just so odd. When I think back on it now, they were the first band I got into that is like a lot of the stuff I still find the most interesting today. They also were included on The World’s End soundtrack and I was so excited that I listened to it a lot, and that kinda set the foundation for me getting more into britpop and Blur. :)

What are your favourite lyrics by 5? (The Replacements) Umm god, all of “Androgynous” and “Alex Chilton” hmmm but also “hold my life, until I’m ready to use it” from “Hold My Life” and god, “the ones who love us best, are the ones we’ll lay to rest, the ones who love us least, are the ones we’ll die to please” from “Bastards of Young.” Yeah, those are good ones.

How many time have you seen 4 live? (Noel Gallagher) Three times! Once on the Chasing Yesterday tour and twice for Who Built The Moon?

What’s your favourite song by 7? (Echo & the Bunnymen) SPARE US THE BUTTER!! sorry, um “The Cutter” and also “Gods Will Be Gods”

Is there a song by 3 that makes you sad? (Pavement) YES! ALL OF THEIR SONSG MAKE ME SAD!! nahhh just kidding. “Here” makes me really sad bc it feels very emotionally real and also bc there is a cover of it at the end of the movie about David Foster Wallace. Also “Gold Soundz” bc it sounds like the ache of happier times and shit. Idk why their songs make me really emotional.

What’s your favourite song by 9? (The Wedding Present) UMM right now I’m obsessed with “Once More” but some other faves are “What Have I Said Now?” “Crawl” “Kennedy” and “Brassneck”

How did you get into 2? (The Fall) JOHN PEEL!!! Actually that isn’t true!! I got into them bc Mark E. Smith is on the Gorillaz song “Glitter Freeze” and I guess I heard something about them from research I was doing for that mod project bc that was when I watched a BBC documentary on them bc youtube suggested it. But I didn’t hear any of their songs until I started listening to John Peel. The first ones I heard were “Guest Informant!” “Kurious Oranj” and “New Big Prinz” I believe and I was already in love by the time I got halfway through “Kurious Oranj”

How did you get into 10? (The Chameleons) Greg told me to listen to them bc they are probably his favorite band ever. He said if I liked early U2 and Echo & the Bunnymen I would like them and that all three albums they made are perfect and he was right! :)

I’m gonna tag @beachsequence, @bonojour, @whitedeadflower, @the-achtung-babe, @themagicwhip, @lukelibrary, @dis-co-the-que, @left-the-porch, and @puttheghostinwriting, @shakingalltheway, and @explorerof-theunknown 

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

I WOULDN'T SAY REPLACING people are just too cruel with their stsg content </3 (but who am i kidding i LIVE for it) I STARTED READING THE MANGA WITH A FRIEND A WHILE BACK BUT I HAD TO DROP IT AROUND CULLING GAMES BECAUSE OF SCHOOL (i should pick it back up again actually......) i blame school but i also blame that one scene that ruined my entire life (nanami) and seeing that executed??? TSUDA KENJIRO THE MAN THAT YOU ARE!!!! (i wouldn't call myself a nanami simp per se... but i definitely see the appeal and omg just him as a character is so <33333 to me)

JJK 0 I WAS LOSING MY MIND AND OMG YOU GOT TO SEE IT IN THEATERS HOW WAS SEEING THE BLACK FLASHES OMGGGG i want to rewatch jjk 0 now omg (I KEEP SAYING THAT BUT I DON'T REMEMBER TO ACTUALLY DO IT TIL MUCH LATER </33333) and omg :0 another movie i can't speak on manga because idk what happens plot wise after the first quarter-ish of culling games but another movie would be so fun!! i would so love to see it in theaters then too (IN JJK 0 WHEN "at least curse me a little at the end" AND SATORU SPECULATION OF WHAT HE COULD HAVE SAID OMGGGGGGGG the fanart that was pumped out then omg REAWAKENING THE DEMONSSSSSS)

AND INUMAKI!!!! his lack of screentime is criminal i have to say </3 but i think his 'don't move' is doing wonders for his popularity BUT HE IS SO SO CUTE (but idk if this needs to be said but he's not the all day all night type of character for me,, like he's cool and he's very adorable and i love his character and that's it SLKDFJSDLFK AND HIS CT IS LOWKEY VERY TRAGIC,,,,, jjk is another one of those animanga where it's like impossible to have one singular fav now that i'm thinking more on it)

AND ORV!!! joonghyuk definitely gives mother vibes i see it i see it (and kim dokja living on instant ramen (IT HAS TO BE SHIN I THINK HAHAHAHAH) and dread (TM) is sooooooo accurate i think it's not even funny)

i'm also not a fan of horror (<- also scaredy cat) so dw no horror recs from me!! to start it off simply, i would have to say eleceed for some good wholesome (kinda) action and hmmmm return of the blossoming blade (BRO IT'S SO FUNNY AND GOOD I CANNOT RECOMMEND IT ENOUGH) and and and either operation: true love (i read it for the plot and the plot is eunhyeok and dohwa!!!!!!!) or not your typical reincarnation story (i actually really like this one, it really lives up to his title too!!)

also i think i saw that orv is getting live(?) adaptation???? which like.... hm....... idk how to feel about that tbh an anime would go so hard and might be much better,, though i hope they use korean va's and not japanese like they did with solo leveling (BUT SOLO LEVELING WAS ALSO GOOD WITH JP DUB PLEASE DON'T GET ME WRONG PEOPLE WHO HAVE SEEN IT)

and i'm sending you chill and comfy vibes .｡*ﾟ+.*.｡ AND THANK YOU FOR THE APPLE JUICE I LOVE APPLE JUICE!!! let me split the juice with you :3 🧃 (sorry for the insanely long ask alsdkfal)

HI HI KOI !!!!!! NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR LONG ASKS I LOVE THEM SM 🥺🥺🥺

THE CULLING GAME ARC IS MY PERSONAL FAVORITE <33333 hot take but i’ll die on that hill. the fights r SO good . and the characters!!!!!! gosh…. AND PLEASEEEEE NOT THE NANAMI TRAUMA 😭😭😭 that scene had me feeling such genuine dread when i first read it lmao …. THEY DID IT SOO MUCH JUSTICE IN THE ANIME TOO . tsudaken our angel on earth ….

THE JJK 0 BLACK FLASHES ARE SOOOOO FUCKING HYPE I CRIED . yuuta’s love beam REALLY got to me though :((((((( ANDDD OFC THE SATOSUGU SCENE . idk what your thoughts are koi but i can and Will die on the hill that he said ily <33 those r my gay boyfriends . i know them personally. no but kaiji tang revealing that it was three words in the english script wrecked me entirely like What Else Could It Be …………

INUMAKI RLLY IS SUCH A CUTIE … i can’t lie to you koi i don’t care for him much myself but i totally see why people do . just goes to show how far you can get with a good design and power!!!! he’s also such an annoying little sweetheart….. pulling pranks while also being so considerate 🥺🥺 he’s a cutie.

AHH I’M SO HAPPY TO HEAR THE MOTHER VIBES R THERE !!!!! he just gives me like…. strong, nurturing vibes . and kim dokja gives me the opposite. LMAO. i have a feeling i’ll end up loving him the most though… it’s hard 2 tell….

THANK YOU FOR THE RECS <3333 adding them all to my tbr !!!! i’m pretty sure i checked out operation: true love at some point? but i. don’t remember anything about it 😭 romance webtoons always get me tho …. i remember back when i was horrifically obsessed with i love yoo……. it really wasn’t good for my fragile heart….

AHHHHH A LIVE ACTION ????? :000 THAT’S SO FUN….. but yeahhh they’re very hit or miss aren’t they. I ACTUALLY HAVEN’T WATCHED SOLO LEVELING YET ….. but i’ve heard good things abt the main guy’s vas :33

I’M SENDING YOU SOOO MANY COZY VIBES and drinking gratefully from our aply juice :3333 i hope you’re having a lovely day/night koi!!!! pls remember to rest and eat tasty food and drink water <333

[chibicrow]

let's play "show/movie/fandom and I’ll tell you": VRains, Arc V, Zexal, please :> (are three okay? or too much?)

THREE IS PERFECT THANK U. (I had to click 8 pages on my blog to find the original prompt tho lmao @ me) 

AND IT’S THE NEW GEN YGO YEEEEEEEE. I love me some new-gen YGO. (even tho I got a strained relationship with Arc V rn, but once I rewatch it in a couple of years, all should be good lmao)  

VRAINS 

my favorite female character: GHOST GIRL/EMA BESSHO. What a queen. 

my favorite male character: MY FIRE SON HOMURA TAKERU/SOULBURNER!!!!! 

my favorite book/season/etc: ??? I mean, there’s only been two seasons so far (technically), so I think I’ll pass on this one lmao.

my favorite episode (if its a tv show): ok so that episode where Takeru goes to up to Yusaku and is like “H-Hi Playmaker... :D;;;” A masterpiece. 

my favorite cast member: well, it was Ishige Shouya b/c his tweets give me so much life, but then VRAINS was like “hey guess what kaji yuki’s gonna voice homura takeru,” and it’s been him ever since. I’m literally watching four anime rn where he voices major characters. It’s bad lmao. 

my favorite ship: ALL ABOARD THE DATASTORM SHIP!!! 

a character I’d die defending: FUJIKI YUSAKU!!!!! thankfully I haven’t seen a whole lot of hate for him lately (tho, I’ve unfollowed and blocked a good majority of folks I’ve seen hate on him so lmao), but the amount of hate he gets just b/c he doesn’t develop as visibly as the Other Treasured Soft Main Protags is a bunch of bullshit. also I know it says character and not characters, but I’d also jump in front of an army tank and punch Blood Shepherd in the face for Homura Takeru. 

a character I just can’t sympathize with: Go Onizuka, which apparently makes me racist, but go off, I guess, Go Onizuka fans.... 

a character I grew to love: Spectre. Surprisingly. Even tho he was such a little shit in the last arc/season, especially towards Blue Angel. I blame the last VRAINS fic I wrote 1000% and the fact Blue Girl also slightly irritates me now for this tho lmao

my anti otp: ANTI-OTP AND NOT NOTP? WHAT. But anyway, I’ve said all my VRAINS anti-OTPs at this point I think, but considering I saw this pair recently, Aoi x Yusaku. Can understand why people would like it, but just. Can’t get on that ship. 

Arc V

my favorite female character: HIIRAGI YUZU!!!! 

my favorite male character: if we’re counting veteran characters, CROW HOGAN-SAMA OF COURSE

my favorite book/season/etc: Synchro Dimension arc best arc. don’t change my mind. 

my favorite episode (if its a tv show): when Crow-sama defied everyone’s expectations and just uncarded himself and tag-teamed with Shingo to roast Zarc into oblivion. I didn’t even care that they were defeated, I was just glad Crow-sama wasn’t a card anymore. :’D (AND IT WAS TWO DAYS BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY TOO. BEST PRESENT.) 

my favorite cast member: BESIDES SHINTARO ASANUMA, OnoKen. Love him so much. Also Hosoyan. 

my favorite ship: ugh I have so many fave ships from Arc V tho. YugoxRin, YuyaxYuzu, Crow-samaxShinji.... (also I low-key ship ShingoxSerena lmao) 

a character I’d die defending: besides Crow-sama (obviously), I would get hit by a bus for Sakaki Yuya. (I’m seeing a theme here with the main protags... smh @ fandom) 

a character I just can’t sympathize with: as much as I tried to, Yuuri. After he carded Yusho, that was it lmao. Any sympathy I had for him was GONE. like can u just let people live a little, you wilted cabbage patch kid. 

a character I grew to love: SAWATARI-SAN!!! oh man, he used to annoy me so much in the pre-JYC arc, but then his rematch with Yuya was SO GOOD. But then he got on my nerves again up until the Synchro Dimension arc. and then he became friends with Crow-sama. And it was all smooth sailing in the liking department from there lmao. I love Shingo.

my anti otp: I used to be kinda on board with this ship, but YuurixSerena. I think the overexposure to it killed all the tolerance I had for it.... 

ZeXal 

my favorite female character: ANNA KOZUKI. Her personality was an instant hit for me lmao. 

my favorite male character: even tho he died too much in ZeXal, Astral. I still love you, my naked blue alien. REAL close second is my Shark son tho. 

my favorite book/season/etc: The Barian Invasion arc but like. Just before the Sargossa mini-arc. That was a good arc (with minimal amount of emotional damage!) 

my favorite episode (if its a tv show): THE ASTRAL-YUMA REUNION IN ZEXAL II AFTER ASTRAL DECIDED TO BE MIA FOR LIKE 10 EPISODES. I BAWLED!!!! so good ;A; 

my favorite cast member: besides Hosoyan (FANSERVICE!!!!), Hatanaka. What a gem. I love him. 

my favorite ship: KEYSHIPPING. KEYSHIPPING. KEYSHIPPING. 

a character I’d die defending: I would get sucked in a black hole for Tsukumo Yuma. it’s the least I can do to atone for my sins. 

a character I just can’t sympathize with: ??? I mean, other than Don “I’m petty AS FUCK” Thousand or Mr. “HEART BURNING!!!!” Heartland or Vector’s dad, I don’t know lmao. I could sympathize with them all. 

a character I grew to love: not really “love” and not that it took me a long time to tolerate him, but Tokunosuke 

my anti otp: not . . . sure I have one?? the benefits of watching ZeXal long after it aired, I guess lmao. 

[hoe-imaginess]

replies

so many replies i’m sorry kahsdkjfahds

BTW!!!

I’m not accepting requests!!! There are a few requests that are short enough I can answer as replies but otherwise I’ve had a lot sent in in the past two weeks. I’ll be deleting those

OH my this is deep. Idk if I’m deep enough to answer this lmao but uhhhh. I think being the leader of a group like the Troupe should suggest he does believe in free will as a concept? The spiders all seem to be liberated from rules and expectations beyond those within the Troupe. Even then, they seem to be able to agree and disagree at will. Chrollo probably thinks free will isn’t inherent? But something you have to reach and choose for yourself, if you ask me. He wouldn’t think just anybody could attain free will. Some people are probably too weak, in his mind, to truly have free will

I am suchhhhh an Aokiji hoe. Pls request Aokiji. I also really like Fujitora. Akainu and Kizaru I’m kinda like ??? eh?? I don’t personally hoe for them but I’m down to write for them!

omg!!!! ksjhakshdkfajhds idk why I just get so excited talking birds

That’s good you’re moving her to a raw diet! I’m one of those annoying no pellets type of people, and I know how hard it is to change a diet. As long as it was gradual and not sudden, hopefully she’ll come around and start eating. Otherwise, if the not eating continues, maybe take her to the vet again and see if there’s something wrong? 

As for liver counts, I’m sure there’s medication to give but as for other options, milk thistle seed! IT’S SO IMPORTANT! So good for birdy liver. I think a rule of thumb is 10 seeds daily for every 100 grams. Female Eclectus are fatties. Very phat. I think the max weight for one sub species is like 400 grams? So about 40 seeds a day. Just depends on her weight! You can order them online or find them in a health food store

OMG I almost feel a little bad for Neji lmao. I don’t think he cares that much about his appearance HOWEVER I do think he’d start trying to primp himself a little if he felt like he had some competition?

Hmmmm well which fandom are you talking about! There are a few I can think of from each 

I think Tobirama is generally annoyed with Hashi’s kids if they take after their dad. But he ofc loves them. Hashirama on the other hand is always trying to win Tobi’s kids over with gifts and sweets and all that. He wants to be the cool uncle so bad

Ahhhhhh thank you fam I fhkashdfkasjhfkdshafka I’m glad you found me too <3

Ooooooo uhhhh let me see. I’m really not big in Pariston (mostly bc I only watched the Election arc like once so idk much about all the new characters) but I think at the foundation he’s all about rivalry. The whole Ging thing is a different story ofc lmao but I personally don’t see Pariston’s feelings for Ging going beyond some admiration maybe?? But mostly it’s a rivalry there. He may very well find power attractive though. He seems like the type. But he also seems like the type who wouldn’t want to be undermined by a strong s/o. So it’s kinda confusing

omg thank u so much ily <33333

AHHH thank u i was really worried I didn’t write it how you expected me to. You’re so welcome fam <3 thx for requesting

I totally understand!!! I’m really down to write ace headcanons whenever, just as long as I get them right. I don’t want to presume too much or too little, like I said. But I think a great many characters in the naruto verse, and really most anime fandoms, can be ace. It just fits a lot of people, ya know? 

@prettykitten123  YES I’m so excited for Infinity War. I’ve watched the trailer at least 20 times

I know it’s probably a cliche answer but: Madara. He can get involved with someone without caring for them emotionally, tbh. So it would be easy to cheat. To him it might not be cheating though, just enjoying other options

I reallllly need to update for like the past three months lmao. It’s just getting so long, that’s why I keep having to separate fandoms by the character’s names. Tumblr loses all my hyperlinks when the posts become too long so it sucks kajshdkfahskfjdahs I’ll hopefully update it soon

akjshdflksjdhfkajscn please read them watch them do it all pls they’re both so goooood <3 thx fam

@prettykitten123

I’m really late but happy holidays! merry christmas! happy new year! happy late birthday to Madara daddy <3

He’s not about that blue balls shit. Zoro is THOTTY

AKJHSFLJhbjkshfkjsbfksandfkjasnfkjanskdjnkjn I bet everyone on Whitebeard’s crew would tease marco when his s/o is pregnant, asking when he thinks his kid is gonna hatch and what not

I think I’ve done that a little before? It’s kinda difficult not to if the headcanon request is REALLY specific. But I do see what you’re saying. I like my headcanons to be as general as possible so there’s a little left to the imagination, ya feel?

LMAO FUCK

[gaycousinlarry]

Annual Writing Self-Evaluation

*All answers should be about works published in 2017.

1. List of works published this year:

If the story is part of a series or a challenge I’ve put the name of the series/challenge in parenthesis.

In the order that they were posted

Them Butterflies (Them Butterflies)

Moments of Memories

You light up the room (short fics & drabbles)

They don’t know (short fics & drabbles)

Just for you (short fics & drabbles)

Follow the sun (short fics & drabbles)

Flutter of a Butterfly (Them Butterflies)

sun kissed (short fics & drabbles)

Hot Guy (short fics & drabbles)

Remind Me Again

the sun comes back up

a night like this (daydreams are made of this)

a day like a dream (daydreams are made of this)

It’s halftime. Are you ready to go? (50 reasons to Have Sex Larry Fic Fest)

deck the halls with boughs of holly (Larry Winter Drabble Challenge)

The rest under the cut <3

2. Work you are most proud of (and why): Them Butterflies will always have a very special place in my heart. It was the first fic I wrote/posted and that was a huge step for me. I also think it, in a way, set a tone for who I am as a writer lol. It gave me the courage to keep writing, to see what I’m good at and what I need to work on. I’m also so in love with the characters from this verse, I still think about them all the time.

3. Work you are least proud of (and why): Okay I’m going to be obnoxious now, but I’m sort of ridiculously proud of everything that I’ve written? Not because I think they’re all perfect or even particularly good, but because it was something I wrote and even if I don’t like it, it’s helped me get better. I do worry about what people will think of my writing and I always hope people will enjoy it. But I think I’ve never had too high expectations on my own writing because I literally just started writing a year ago and I’m still amazed that I write at all and that I love it so much haha.

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing: This is from Moments of Memories. These two break and mend my heart in equal parts and in some strange sort of way I feel honoured to have written about them.

And it’s so much more than Harry ever imagined. Because he always dreamed of butterflies in his stomach, shaky breaths and soft lips, and it is all that, but also calloused hands holding his face delicately, tears welling up in two pairs of eyes and lips wobbling into wide grins of equal parts disbelief and elation. His fingers find the deep lines at Louis’ temples, wiping at the wetness collected there and he thinks that from now on he doesn’t want to miss a single tear.

They break apart and breathe in the same air. Share another moment containing hundreds of moments, but this time it consists of moments that never were. Kisses never shared, tearful eyes that never had the opportunity to find comfort and understanding in each other. It is years spent apart that wore down their hearts and shrivelled their thoughts.

5. Share or describe a favorite comment you received: I don’t think I can pick one. There are people who’ve told me my writing makes them cry, that it’s one of their favourite fics, that I’ve moved them and that they come back to read my stories again and again. I have no words to describe how much every single comment means, especially if someone take the time to say why they enjoyed the story. Okay now I’m weepy so I better stop.

6. A time when writing was really, really hard: I struggled quite a bit with Remind Me Again at times because the story was so intuitive to me and it’s difficult to get that to make sense to other people. I knew the feeling I wanted to get across, knew why things were happening the way they were, but the characters didn’t always make sense and sometimes it felt like I was swimming in an ocean of jumbled messy EMOTIONS that made no sense outside my own head. Thank to the gods Nic was there to pull my out of it. Over and over. And over again.

7. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: I would say… no? The stories don’t always end up the way I thought they would, but I think they very rarely surprise me. I guess Remind Me Again was more of a continuous stream of revelations though haha. More like things falling into place than coming out of left field? I dunno.

8. How did you grow as a writer this year: Oh my god. I became a writer this year hahaha! I learned that all these thoughts and feelings (cheers to that if you don’t need them!) that I’ve carried around with me my whole life can be put down and other people can read it and enjoy the things that I’ve kept locked up for so long? Amaze.

What has helped me the most is HANDS DOWN working with the most incredible beta in the world, Nic @louandhazaf . She puts words to the mess that is the thoughts in my head and makes me sit down and think about why a character does something. She makes me see that sometimes less is more. Sometimes more is definitely more so why the frick aren’t I showing that? She makes me think more like a storyteller and a writer rather than just someone vomiting feelings into a computer.

9. How do you hope to grow next year: I’d like to get better at what I already think is my strength, which is stories that are emotionally/character driven. To understand that it’s okay to write like that, but that it also doesn’t mean it has to be all over the place heh.

I would however like to get better at world building and maybe, at least a little bit, dip my toes into more plot based stories…. okay that will literally never happen who am I kidding. I guess what I’d like is to get better at using the surroundings and symbols, to try to be more structured even when it comes to things beyond timelines and scenes.

I just want to keep writing and find new stories to write and characters to fall in love with and discover my own writing while doing that. I still feel extremely new to the process of writing so. I think I should be kind to myself and just let me enjoy it haha.

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): NIIIIIIICCCC! <33333 I literally could never thank her enough. The thought and the time she’s put into helping me, to make my writing make sense to myself, to push me and question me and make me annoyed at myself because I kind of sort of already knew that didn’t make sense but I didn’t CARE and now she’s pointing to the mess and asks What is this? Why is it? but THEN we get to the best part which is when her questions makes me think and then new inspiration hits and all I want to do is write write write. I cannot believe my luck to have found you and get to call you my friend on top of that. Miracles and all that.

I also have to say, I read so much fic and this fandom has so much of it that is absolutely mind blowingly spectacular. I think reading is one of the best ways to become a better writer because it sort of… stretches out your mind and it makes you think about why that writer made you belly drop to the bottom of the ocean with just one word. God I love the writers of this fandom so incredibly much, your words mean so much to me, both as a writer and as a like... human being.

11. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: I have read and related to m/m fic since I was very young. It’s been a way for me to escape reality but also find comfort in characters that are more like me than heteronormative mainstream stories. Then this year I started reading f/f and my world tilted off its axis and put a billions thoughts in my head that I thought I was done dealing with a thousand years ago. Then I sat down and wrote girl direction myself and yeah. Gods I love girls.

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: BE KIND TO YOURSELF! Honestly the fact that you’ve written anything at all is AMAZING. Every single word you put on that page is wonderful. If you don’t let yourself explore and need everything to be perfect from the start, it won’t be fun and you’ll never learn more. You learn by making mistakes and just writing, no matter what it is. Betas, editing and rewriting are the magical words.

13. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: -Oh gosh. I’m reaaaally looking forward to posting my Hope Floats AU that will probably come out in January. I have worked on it since this summer and it’s made me sweat and cry and laugh. Cannot wait to show it to you guys and I’m so happy @curleduphl is doing amazing artwork for it <3

-I’ll continue writing my girl direction series. I have the next part planned out, I just need to… write it.

-I have a “summer nights” fic that I hope to write. They’re teenagers and it’s summer and Louis skates at the park every night and Harry cannot stop staring. I already have a playlist for it soooo… haha.

-Louis babysits Harry’s cat and has a deep and meaningful conversation with the cat about his feelings for her Papa.

-Omega/Omega fic. I love ABO fics and I’ve had this idea forever. I hope I can gather up the guts to actually write it. Friends to lovers and ridiculous amounts of pining.

-I would also like to write a snippet from the Them Butterflies series. They are at a lake house with their friends and Harry has been really quiet over the past few days.

-THE INCREDIBLE AMAZING IDEA THAT WILL COME TO ME ANY SECOND NOW

14. Tag three writers/artists whose answers you’d like to read. ;)

I don’t know if you’ve been tagged before but I’d love to read this from @haloeverlasting @rosegoldhl @indiaalphawhiskey <3333

[vowel-in-thug]

dearest gemma,first your fics light up my dull life and make my anxiety ease n writing flow,I'd hug u tight seriously Second,would u do the ask thing for Max/Anne/Jack in orange verse?How they raised the kid,idk. And damn I love orange verse with all my broken heart

Thank you so much!!!! i’m so glad i ease the anxiety

Let’s see…….. Jack/Anne/Max + Baby Annie:

–They had originally thought about going North but Jack can’t take the col,d so instead they move to French Louisiana, even though Jack’s just like “great a swamp,” but at least here he can feel his balls.

– Max tries to teach them how to speak French and Jack is very proud of how fast he picks it up, but his accent is so terrible most people don’t understand him. Max has to quietly spread the rumor that he suffers from a head injury which is why his speech is so garbled. Anne refuses to learn and so she never speaks in public, not that she’d want to anyway.

– They have a ranch and raise sheep, which Max has able to turn into a profitable wool business. Jack is surprisingly adept at wrangling and herding sheep, because it’s not that much different than serving as Quartermaster for Vane’s crew. Max and Anne think he just likes wielding the big stick.

– Anne insists she will be responsible for Annie’s education, and the other two are slightly wary of that at first, until they see Annie already able to read by three years old, write by four, and is supremely gifted in music, something of which even Jack didn’t know Anne could do. Although Annie seems to prefer painting, and playing with the sheep.  She and Anne also go into the woods surrounding their ranch, and Anne teaches her how to hunt and fish (and, secretly, fight. Just in case). 

– Max teaches her French. Jack teaches her how to shave a sheep.

– A lot of the people in town don’t really….understand the relationship….at all. Do they own Max? Is she a caretaker for them, a mute and a brain damaged sheepherder? Whose daughter is Annie? But the parish is small, and everyone keeps to themselves, and as long as they keep providing quality wool and don’t cause any trouble, no one looks into it very hard.

 – Their sex life is….also complicated, because the ranch is small, and Annie is right there, and sure. One day they’ll have to explain it to her, how exactly they all love each other, but they are the ones raising her, after all. She won’t ever learn that kind of prejudice. Annie will never grow up thinking that it’s wrong to love someone any way they want. She will know that love comes in every and all forms, and she will know that everyone deserves to be free. That women have the right to have a place in this world, that she can achieve anything she wants to, as long as she is smart and strong and loves and is loved. 

[wickedchrissy]

For The Just Made Up Ask Thing: 1, 2, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 17, 18, 19, 21, 23, 25, 28, 29, 30, 31, 36, 37, 43, 44, 49, 55, 56, 60, 62, 63, 66, 69, 74, 75. I Love You And I ) (ope Somefin Good ) (appens To You Soon

For whatever reason I never got the notification for this so I’ll just do it now haha

Lots of good stuff has been happening to me! And I hope you’re feeling better hun

1. Are you a side, back, or front sleeper? I fall asleep on my side but end up on my back usually

2. When you hum random music what song is it? like the theme song to mario or some shit

5: How did you fall into the tumblr hellpit? my friend in highschool made me one a week before midterms and guess who didn’t want to do midterms

6: What fan interest of yours would you least prefer to explain in your workplace? My Little Pony. While I’m no longer a fan, I still enjoyed the show for a few good seasons before the fandom ruined it. Would rather not be seen as a brony to coworkers

7: What fan interest or yours would you most enjoy explaining in your workplace? Harry Potter. In fact I actually got a ton of my coworkers to sort themselves on pottermore

8: Last song you listened to? Lucky Strike–Maroon 5

9: Weirdest thing on your dash today? THIS

17: What type of mad science will you Show Them All with? (ex: mad chemical engineer, mad library scientist, mad linguist). Which of your creations will probably turn on you? okay this question confuses me lmao. I guess I’m a mad punner? and I’d bet one about a lightswitch ;D

18: Favorite cheesy trope? I’m a sucker for soulmate stuff or friends to lovers. mostly because I believe in it haha

19: Favorite trope nobody writes enough of? FWB tropes (I’m sinful)

21: Wierdest tumblr drama you’ve been a part of or stumbled across. God dude idek. so much drama. I don’t really care.

23: What is something you collect? fortunes from fortune cookies :)

25: The last game you played is crossed with the zombie apocalypse and now going down outside your window. How boned are you? well the last game I played was Zelda: Twilight Princess so I guess I’m a wolf so not bad actually?

28: Your icon is now the voice of your inner therapist. How is this gonna go? Dude Lance as my inner therapist? he is such a good person and loves to help other people out and use humor aw damn it’ll be great!!

29: Name a kink you only like hypothetically. Threesomes. Sounds super awesome but now that I’ve found someone I love adding anyone else to the picture just seems wrong. Or even just unsatisfying? Why would I want to add a foreign body into an already perfect dynamic?

30: Name a kink you find bewildering. “Daddy”

31: You have acquired: a mouse, a lizard, a rabbit, a spider, a domestic fox. Name them! Who gets to sleep on the bed? Snickers. Reptar. Flopsy. Alice. Vulpix. and the fox and the rabbit. hopefully they don’t eat each other lmao

36: What meme gets on your nerves? Any memes about shootings. Please draw a line.

37: Showers or baths? I always shower but god a bath sounds lovely

43: Shuffle up a random song on your media player. Now tell me what ship/story goes with it. I got I.M. SIN by Five Finger Death Punch and lmao I can only think of Keith

44: What’s making you happiest recently? :) my boyfriend!!

49: Tell me a really obscure fact you know. it’s illegal to tie giraffes to poles in certain parts of California

55: Favorite food for every color of the rainbow. interesting. Red-strawberries. Orange-um oranges lmao. Yellow–pasta!. Green–peas. Blue–this has to be blueberries right? like you’re kidding. Purple-there’s definitely no purple food, fuck you. Pink–shrimp

56: If you were a poltergeist where would you haunt and what would be your preferred style of prank? I’d haunt my old college dorms and steal people’s food right after they cooked it mwahaha

60: Dragons, dinosaurs, or aliens? DRAGONS

62: Insult the asker of this question creatively. Your mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberries.

63: In an ideal world, what would you like done with your body after you die? I’d like to made into a tree!! :)

66: What are the three traits you value the most in others? Consideration, Compassion, Appreciation

69: Answer number 60 like it was a “fuck, marry, kill” rhetorical. now THAT is a good question haha. Um if it can be dragon/dinosaur/alien of my choosing then I’ll fuck the alien (*cough allura cough*), marry a dragon (probably from Dragon Tales), and kill the dinosaur cause it’s already dead

74: If you were a superhero, what would be your one weakness? literally just children. like I’m so bad. bring a kid into the picture and I’ll do anything.

75: Describe a weird encounter you had with a bug. So my older sister has arachnophobia, went downstairs once and just screamed and ran back up. Figuring it would be a little house spider my little sister goes down stairs to kill it, screamed and went back up. So me, with no fear of spiders, went down and, to my surprise, saw a spider the size of my hand and like an inch thick. No way was I putting my hand near that thing. So I ran upstairs to grab the vacuum, actually scared for once. I held up the hose like my sword and the vacuum as my shield as my sisters cowered behind me. After a deep breath I dove and sucked up the spider in one fell swoop! For a moment I was relieved until my younger sister just mutters “what if crawls out…” so now I finally start screaming, run upstairs and put the vacuum out on the deck, slam the door, and wait for my dad to get home. The end.

[minniesugakookies]

60 Truth Tag

I was tagged by @nottodaygot7 <33333

1. Nickname(s): Meggy 

2. Bias: Bts: Jungkook, Got7: Bambam, Monsta x: Minhyuk 

3. Blood type: I think I’m AB+

4. Relationship status: Single

5. Birthday: May 8th :)

6. Zodiac Sign: Taurus

7. Pronouns: She/Her

8. Hair Length: Just slightly below my shoulder

9. Height: 165 cm

10. A crush: Yes 

11. What do you like about yourself: My legs and recently my small hands (surprisingly)

12. Right or left handed: Right handed

13. List of three favourite colours: Midnight blue, lilac purple, peachy pink

14. Right now eating: Nothing

15. Drinking right now: Nothing but I had some water just a few minutes ago

16. I’m about to do: Go to sleep, maybe scroll through tumblr for a bit

17. Listening to: Meet me in the woods by Lord Huron

18. Kids: I want two eventually

19. Get Married: Eventually, maybe in my twenties

20. Recent phone call: Other than my dad, my best friend

21. Have you ever dated someone twice: Nope

22. Been cheated on: Nope

23. Kissed someone and regretted it: Can’t regret a kiss if you’ve never had one lol

24. Lost someone special: No, but I almost did

25. Been depressed: Yes

26. Been drunk and thrown up: Nope

27. Have glasses or contacts: I have both

28. Had sex on a first date: I haven’t even been on a date

29. Broken someone’s heart: Hope not

30. Turned someone down: Yeah

31. Cried when someone died: Not a person, but an animal

32. Fallen for a friend: No

33. In the last year, have you made a new friend: Yeh

34. Fallen out of love: I’ve never been in love, at least I think so

35. Laughed until you cried: Fucking so many times

36. Met someone who changed you: Yup

37. Found out who your true friends were: I don’t think I have yet

38. Found out that someone was talking about you: All the fucking time, sometimes it’s not that bad but my some of my friends, friends tell them that they shouldn’t hang out with me 

39. Lips or Eyes: Eyes

40. Hugs or Kisses: Hugs

41. Shorter or Taller: Shorter, depends on the person though

42. Romantic or Spontaneous: Both

43. Sensitive or Loud: Both

44. Hookup or Relationship: Relationship

45. First best friend: Harlie 

46: Surgery: Nope

47. Sports I joined: Volleyball, Basketball, Flag Football. Soccer and Baseball when I was younger

48. Do you believe in yourself: Sometimes

49. Miracles: Sort of

50. Love at first sight: Sort of

51. Heaven: I have no clue, it’s off and on

52. Do you have any pets: A dog named Sawyer and a cat named Seven

53. Do you want to change your name: I honestly do, I really don’t like my name

54. What did you do for your last birthday: I went bowling

55. What time did you wake up today: Around 10 

56. What were doing last night at midnight: Sleeping

57. Something you really can’t wait for: Nothing at the moment

58. Last time you saw your mom: About 20 minutes ago

59. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: Probably to make my parents relationship better, make my dad a happier person

60. What’s getting on your nerves: When someone judges you for something that makes you really happy and/or your really like/are passionate about

I’m tagging @kookies-for-taehyung