#they were parts on a boat highest to lowest

[hobbitunderthemountain]

nothing like remembering weird nuggets of information and my coworkers are like wtf how do you know this I'm just shouting IDK IDK IDK IM AUTISTIC?!?? LITTLE SHIT LIKE THIS STICKS IN MY HEAD I GUESS????

[hottubraccoon]

Great Kettering; land of Artistry and Pride.

south-east corner of the continent, primarily orc citizens

Character SHORT List:

Dima Grimscale

Dragonrider 2.0

Erick Livan

Felix Enrel

Harry Enrel

Julia Violet

Lindsey Livan

Miss Seashell

Pent Enrel

Kent Darkwater

thomashetzler on Unsplash.

Geography:

Great Kettering is based on the UK islands physical geography*. Great Kettering has slight weather changes with the seasons, primarily an increase in humidity and less rainfall in the summer months. Mostly known to be cold and wet overall. Tsunamis can happen along the coast to the south, and south-east. Earthquakes are small distant shakes from the far west. Droughts are rare and only in very dire situations. Lots of coastal towns are on the coast cliffs rather than the coast, and therefore are generally safe from the usual tsunamis that occur. Boat living... isn't uncommon yet dangerous depending on the time of year (hence the phrase, sturdy like GK's fishers). Earthquakes aren't an issue just noticeable along the west border. Great winters are prepared for a lot like Solistal does. 

*but only when I feel like it lol

Architecture:

GK is a mix of my personal headcanons for orcs and fantasy England. The most common form of landmark is the stone/moss circles, each with their own pattern, like a fingerprint. Generally, only those born in the area will be familiar with these landmarks without a map. Because of this, the moss circles are speculated to be linked to the orc-ish Aeons religion. Kelp forests are a special sight along GK coasts. The most well known location in GK is the sunken castle, and its bridges to nowhere. One explanation is that the coastal cliff was washed away and the castle was too heavy so it fell into the ocean to be forgotten, another blames the mythological 'Thorns' for putting it their during one of their tantrums. For a foreigner, the knight tourneys are a highly anticipated event due to the invitation of both the highest king and lowest servant. Most towns start with a safe drinking water source in the middle, market and community buildings around that, then common dwellings around those. For Kettering, the capital, there are 'districts' that citizens must get permits to build inside. These districts help with deliveries, city planning, guard patrols, and lock down procedures. Again, most towns are situated along the south coast, and it's either the direct coast or, if the cliffs are too severe, then it'll be as high on a hill they can get while still in viewing distance of the sea. On the north side of Great Kettering, it still follows the idea of the highest hills. Including Kettering, which itself has a 'natural moat' around it, although the city surrounding the castle has since expanded further around the lake as well. In smaller towns, people are clumped together, tiny and people live in each others pockets, whereas bigger towns are more spacious. That said, construction is trending towards taller rather than wider. Common structures are in the easy to acquire and transport materials, where the elegant marbles and quartz are left for Kettering or other religious sites in other large towns.

Trade/Commerce:

GK trade away seafood for different 'exotic' foods and their artisans are highly sorted after. They import from Solistal for specialty materials to craft with. Kamikita holds a chokehold on trading routes and this frustrates GK. They import from Birkina for island herbs and spices, as well as dyes for their crafts. Can be self-sufficient if trades were to be suddenly cut. The world trade is currency based but smaller store keepers accept barters... if you can talk them into it. Solistal's ores/minerals and their jewelcrafters are flaunted as expensive goods and a highly requested import. Whereas 'seals' or magical coins are the least sought after. GK's embroiders are the most asked for export.

sapegin on Unsplash.

Other Parts:

For Great Kettering. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

For Solistal. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

For Kamikita. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

For Birkina. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

[unrequitedloveletter]

The Fire That Burns Within- N.L x fem! reader Chapter Five

Masterlist

Okay! here’s the fifth chapter! There might be two updates a day starting Monday because the goal is to have this fic out by the end of June (I have a few things up my sleeve for next month because it’s pride month and I want to celebrate my queerness because it’s not something I’m very vocal about but this June I have decided I will scream from the rooftops about it) 

Fic type- this one is hurt,, not quite angst but still very painful

Warnings- mentions of death, mentions of physical violence (punching someone in the face is mentioned once)

You’d woken up after only forty-five minutes spent asleep. Part of you wanted to wander the halls again, but you did not want to see a certain blond prince with a too-handsome smirk and a very sharp tone when he spoke with malicious intent. 

Still, you needed to leave your room. As you sat up and reached for your flint, you realized that to stay in your room for too much longer was to suffocate. You liked your quarters in the Spinning Wheel well enough, but sometimes, it was truly impossible to breathe while trapped within those walls. 

So, you straightened out your roughspun tunic. You tucked your flint into the pocket of your trousers and pulled your combat boots back on. You objected not to wear your kefta and put your hands into your pockets as you left your room behind.

You wandered until you had found a balcony, felt the cool of the wind against your cheeks. You thought back to Nikolai’s remark, felt yourself yearning for death all over again. 

You speak like him. The Darkling. 

Considering your hatred for Nikolai, for his bloodline, you supposed it was the truth that he could’ve said worse in retaliation to your expressions of dislike. He very well could’ve had you tried for speaking against him and put you to the prison cells. 

Nikolai could’ve pointed out that you had once been so loyal to the Darkling that your kefta had been embroidered in black. 

There were a thousand different things he could’ve done to retaliate against you, each one crueler than the last, and somehow, the remark he’d made had hurt worse than any one of those things might’ve. 

“He is an idiot of the highest degree,” you jumped at the sound of Zoyas voice, having turned your back to the exit and not focused on anything but the delicate sound of snow falling against the stone. “The Lantsov prince. I overheard him talking to Mal, trying to figure out how to apologize for what might be the lowest blow in verbal history. He repeated his words verbatim, even. Genya heard it, and the only reason she stayed behind was so that she could try to convince Alina to punch him again.” 

“He was right.”

“He was not,” Zoya said. “You talk nothing like the Darkling. Nikolai should be so lucky to be in your company, and had he asked me for advice I would’ve told him he needed to take a knee and grovel.” 

You shook your head. “You don’t--I was one of his most trusted, Zoya. I saw all of the horrors firsthand and thought nothing of them until I watched him expand the Fold rather than shrink it. I’ve watched countless people die, and before Alina Starkov dared to resist the Darkling and his charms, thought it was par for the course. I thought that every death he caused was necessary, did not know that the Darkling was a man to whom my trust should never have been given until I watched him almost kill the girl everyone thinks is to be our salvation.” 

“You were charmed,” Zoya said, shrugging easily. “You liked the idea of power. Of respect. We all did, Y/N. Fedyor carried the black embroidery. Ivan did. I did at one point. Genya did during her time on the boat with you while the Darkling held Alina captive and in the days leading up to the expansion of the Fold. Alina did during her first stint at the palace--she wore a fully black kefta, if you don’t recall? Everyone liked his power, everyone fell for his charms, until we saw the error in his ways.”

“Nikolai--”

“Was behaving like an idiot,” Zoya cut. “He said something really, incredibly stupid, and if he does less than grovel, beg for your forgiveness--especially considering that he has to know the weight his comment ungraciously dropped upon your shoulders--and I find out that he has done less, I will summon a wind so strong that it pushes him into a wall and leaves an indent of his body when all is said and done.” 

You sighed. You did not want to think of the Darkling or of a future king any longer. You wanted to eat dinner, drink tea if any were available, and sleep to your hearts content. 

You let Zoya lead you back inside, headed to the dining hall and avoided Nikolai with no intent to see him for the remainder of the day. 

-

“I believe it is the truth that I owe you an apology,” Nikolai said. “I am sorry for my words, Y/N.” 

A couple of hours had gone past. Night had fallen, and you had fallen into your rhythm of moving about the endless corridors, finding solace in the low burning torches and the sound of your footfalls against the stone that made up the floor. 

“I don’t need your apologies, Nikolai,” you said. “You were right. I talk like him. I concede. Are you content in knowing that?” 

“I never meant harm.”

“If you did not mean harm, you would not have spoken,” you said. “You said that to hurt me, and I know that I deserve it given how I’ve treated you, but fuck that was a hit. You hit a part of me that I did not know still existed.” 

“I know that I did,” Nikolai said with a nod. “I did mean to, and I lied when I said I didn’t mean harm because I did, and I acknowledge that. I regret having said what I did, though, and I wanted to make sure you knew that I feel sorry about it.” 

You did not know whether or not you wanted to forgive him, but the words fell from your lips before you could stop and think. “Thank you for your apology. I accept it for now, but I would very much like to be allowed to return to my quarters without interruption.”

You turned to look at him, caught his nod. 

“I will allow you to do that, then,” he said. 

You did not respond. You only returned to your quarters, closed your eyes, and tried to get some rest. 

[thefloorisbalaclava]

Going The Distance - Scene Five: Cuando Nadie Me Ve

Pairing: Javi Gutiérrez x Film Assistant F!Reader x Dieter Bravo

Words: 2.2k

Chapter warnings: Masturbation, naughty thoughts, drinking, the guys ogling you, a little touching

**The overall rating of this fic ranges from Mature to Explicit**

Summary: Javi tries his best to keep his fantasies at bay and gets some relief while Dieter reveals an interesting secret at dinner.

[javi g masterlist][dieter masterlist]

[GTD masterlist]

After that ‘talk’ with Dieter, Javi actually felt better about things. Well, in a sense. He was afraid they both had scared you away. A part of him wanted to rush to your room to make sure you were okay, but Dieter was right, you needed space. Space was probably best for him, too.

Javi walked into his bedroom, closing the door behind him. He sighed as he sat on his bed and fell flat on his back. He thought of you. Your smile, your laugh, the way you looked that day he took you out on the speedboat.

Your kiss.

Wait, he thought, he hadn’t kissed you, Dieter had. It seemed that the thought still lingered anyway. Dieter told him how soft your lips were and Javi had imagined them as such. He craved to feel them upon his own with just the smallest amount of tongue so he could see what you taste like.

He sat up and looked at his nightstand feeling a bit ashamed but he still reached over and opened it. It was his private drawer, even the cleaners knew to never go in there. He stared at the different things in there before finally reaching for the special toy he had bought for himself. He had tried it a few times but he had a feeling that this time would feel better than ever.

As he undressed, he could already feel himself getting hard at the thought of you. He couldn’t believe how quickly he had been drawn to you. You were beautiful, ethereal even, and you spoke so sweetly—your voice like music to ears. And the lips that your sweet voice murmured. Dieter told him they were soft and he used his imagination to live the experience.

He laid back, propping himself up on his headboard so he can watch himself. He slipped the toy over his dick—now rock hard and needing release. He turned it on, letting it vibrate on the lowest setting as he began stroking himself.

Your soft lips against his, yes, but now he was picturing them around his dick. He thought of it happening when he took you out on his speedboat. He would look down at you every once in a while, as he steered the boat. At some point, he would have to stop the boat because he would become overwhelmed. His moans would carry out over the water that rocked the boat gently as you bobbed your head on his cock. Usually, he lets the woman control how she did it, but you, he felt like he wanted to put a hand on your head and control the speed. He would probably even have the urge to pump into your mouth just to hear you gag a little.

“Joder…” he whispered as he increased the setting of the vibration, stroking himself faster. He closed his eyes and imagined something else now.

You two were still out on the boat but you had stood and pushed him into the seat. His cock was out, shining in the sun from your saliva. You were wearing a sundress so you just reached under it to slip your panties off. You stepped out of them and moved yourself over his thighs. Before you could sit, he reached under your dress and squeezed your ass before tucking his head under dipping his tongue into your folds.

Now he was thrusting up into the toy, the vibration at the highest setting.

Your taste was something he had never experienced before. His mouth watered as he pulled away to spread your lips so he could find your clit. You called out his name and stroked his curls.

His hips lifted off the bed and now he pictured you sitting down on him, letting his cock slip inside slowly.

The fucking stretch. God, you were so fucking tight. He was stretching it to fit just him, carving a passage made specially for him. He had to lift your dress in order to see himself move in and out of you as you bounced on him.

“Turn around,” he grunted. He helped you to your feet and turned you, spreading his legs and holding you tightly as you sunk back down on him. You used his thighs to balance yourself as you bounced and now he could really see himself slipping in and out of you.

He stroked himself faster. “Yes, my love. Use me,” he moaned to an imaginary you. “I will fill you.” He kept his eyes shut to keep the fantasy going. If he opened his eyes, he would see that it was only his hand and a toy. He needed it to be you.

“Joder…I’m gonna cum…” he gasped. His hips lifted off the bed again as he released into his hand and onto his stomach with some even spurting into the air and landing on the bed. He breathed heavily as he collapsed on the bed again.

A knock sounded and he jumped. “Señor, it is time for dinner.”

“Right, thank you. I am coming,” he said. “Literally,” he mumbled to himself.

He walked to the bathroom to clean himself and then changed his clothes to something more comfortable. He tried to make himself look at presentable as possible before walking out to meet you at the top of the staircase. The look you gave him told him that he probably still looked messier than usual.

--

At the dinner table, it was awkwardly quiet for a moment and you looked back and forth between the two men.

“So…this is good,” you said, pointing to the food.

“Ah, yes, my chef is very good,” Javi said with a smile.

“Chef,” Dieter scoffed. “Do you know how to cook?” he asked Javi.

“I do actually,” Javi answered.

“Really? Would you ever cook for me?” you asked.

“I would do anything you asked me to, dear,” he responded.

“Such a kiss ass,” Dieter teased. Javi ignored him and just looked at you.

“I will cook for you. Just tell me what you like.” He smiled and you smiled back. He had to look away quickly—those thoughts were creeping back.

“Are we having dessert too?” Dieter asked and you giggled.

“You have such a sweet tooth,” you laughed. You and Dieter started joking around and Javi felt a bit left out.

“I am not a drug lord,” he blurted out and you both stopped talking to look at him.

“You’re not?” Dieter asked, suddenly interested. “But you—”

“You can find drugs anywhere here,” he replied before Dieter could finish the question.

“So…family money?” you asked.

“Something like that. If you are wondering why I lied it is because I wanted to sound…cool to you. I wanted to be interesting,” Javi confessed.

“I would have found you interesting without that lie,” you told him.

“You’re lucky you’re hot,” Dieter added with a chuckle.

“Thanks for being honest,” you said to Javi. “But no more lies, okay?”

“Okay,” Javi answered, a boyish grin on his face. “Would you like to watch a movie after dinner?” he asked. “Both of you, of course.”

Dieter raised his hand. “Do I get to pick the movie?”

“No!” Both you and Javi said in unison and Dieter pouted.

“You’d have us watching some…porno,” you teased.

Dieter shrugged. “Maybe, but I would pick one with some great acting.”

“I didn’t know there was such a thing,” you joked.

“Gotta show you my collection one day.” He took a bite of food. “I was in one, you know.”

You sputtered and choked on your food as Javi’s hand froze as he was about to take a sip of wine.

“You what?!” you exclaimed.

“Yeah,” he said nonchalantly, shrugging lazily.

You looked at Javi who had a small smirk on his face. “You didn’t know?” he asked you. “I thought you two were close.”

“I don’t tell her everything. I do have my secrets, you know.” Dieter shoved more food into his mouth.

“I bet,” you mumbled.

“You have some too, no?” Javi asked and you blinked at him.

“Maybe but don’t we all?” You bit your lip as you stared at him.

Javi cleared his throat and looked away. If only you knew the secret he was keeping from you right now.

“Ahhh, you got him,” Dieter teased when he saw the way Javi reacted to you.

“So…shall we watch a movie tonight?” Javi asked, changing the subject.

“Sure,” you said cheerfully. “Deet, can you pass the—never mind I got it.” You stood and reached over the table for the salt. You didn’t notice how your shirt dipped, giving Dieter the perfect view of your bra…and your breasts. He pulled his sunglasses down his nose and grinned. When he looked at Javi he noticed that he was looking at your ass. Dieter chuckled and looked at you again.

“Take…your…time,” he murmured, staring happily. When you finally sat down, you noticed the funny look on both of their faces.

“You both are creeping me out.” You shook your head. “What are we gonna watch?”

“You choose,” Javi offered.

“Got any porn?” Dieter asked and you snorted.

“I do not need it,” Javi said confidently.

“Right. You’re probably some kinda playboy. Different girl every night, hm?” Dieter assumed.

“What? N-No, not at all,” Javi stammered, looking at you.

“What movies do you have?” you asked and Javi stood.

“I’ll show you.” He waited for you and Dieter to stand before walking.

“You got a movie theater or something in here?” Dieter asked, chuckling. Javi stopped at one of the doors and opened it. It was actually a movie theater. Dieter pushed past you both.

“No fucking way. Dude’s really got a theater in his fucking house.” He immediately jumped onto the comfortable couch that was front and center.

“You’re not gonna help us pick a movie?” you asked.

“Nope, I’m comfy,” Dieter said, sitting back.

“Fine.”

“What do you have in mind?” Javi asked. You looked around at the plethora of films he had.

“Hmm…” You dragged your finger along the cases. “How about something with Nic Cage?” you asked and Javi’s smile stretched from ear to ear.

“He is my favorite,” he said excitedly.

“Awesome! Okay, count of three we’ll say which Nic Cage movie we watch. 1…2…3!”

“National Treasure!” you both shouted then laughed.

“Reading my mind, Mr. Gutiérrez?” you joked and he winked.

“You know he did his own stunts for the film, right?” He grabbed the movie off the shelf.

“Did he? He’s a legend,” you said.

“He is, isn’t he?”

You walked over to the couch Dieter was sitting on and pushed his legs out of the way. “Move it.” You plopped down beside him as Javi started the movie. When he walked over, you patted the empty spot on the other side of you. Javi sat beside you and smiled as the movie started.

“Can we turn the lights down?” Dieter asked.

“Of course.” Javi grabbed a remote then pressed a button and the lights went off.

“Perfect,” Dieter purred.

“Hands to yourselves, gentlemen,” you joked.

“That doesn’t pertain to me because I am not a gentleman,” Dieter teased before squeezing your thigh. You giggled and slapped his hand away, moving closer to Javi.

“Oh.” Javi kept his hands on his thighs, flexing them repeatedly.

“Cut it out,” you told Dieter before punching his arm. “You know how ticklish I am. If you keep doing it I’ll end up on Javi’s lap.” You laughed and nudged Javi who was doing his best to just watch the movie.

You and Dieter finally calmed down to watch the movie. Javi finally let his hands rest at his sides, brushing against your thigh accidentally. He looked at you but you didn’t seem to notice. He couldn’t believe how soft your skin was. I mean, he imagined it, but nothing is ever as good as the real thing. Suddenly, you grabbed his thigh.

“I love this scene!” you exclaimed. All Javi could do was look down at your hand. If only you would move it a little higher and—

“No,” Javi said out loud.

“What?” You looked at him, confused.

“Nothing. I apologize.” He patted your thigh gently and you sighed. You sat back, your head landing on Dieter’s arm.

“Oops…sorry.”

“It’s cool. I don’t mind.” Dieter stole a glance at the way the material of your shirt stretched over your breasts.

“Bad Dieter. Bad, bad, bad,” he whispered.

“Huh?” You lifted your head.

“Nothing just thinking out loud,” he lied.

“Oh okay.” You rested your head on his arm again then you felt Javi’s fingers brush against yours. You wondered if he would move them. When he didn’t, you smiled. Their touches had you feeling a way you hadn’t in a long time. Soon you were playing with Javi’s fingers and he looked at you with a shy smile. Dieter’s fingers touched your neck lightly, sending shivers down your spine.

“Like that?” he asked quietly. You nodded as Javi moved his hand away from yours so he could caress your thigh with his fingers.

“Are you enjoying this?” Javi asked. “The movie, I mean,” he added quickly.

“I’m enjoying it very much,” you murmured. His fingers tickled your thigh as he sat back like you. You smiled at him then turned your head and smiled at Dieter.

You could get used to this.

[all-for-geek]

Drawn to the Dark: A Nightmare to Remember Chapter 8: All Out War

Chapter 7

Chapter 9

Fandom: Escape the Night

Summary: As dawn draws nearer, the group continues their mission to free the owners. Time shifts around them as alliances are forged.

Warnings: Depictions of war, violence, and gun fights

Word Count: 2,462

The remaining guests huddled around a couch in the lounge. Joey was at the center of them, reading about the next owner in the journal: a World War I veteran named Colin. Colin bought the house with stolen German gold, but it drove him mad, and he won’t leave until all his gold is found. Some of it was hidden in a lockbox nearby, but Colin protected the gold with a series of riddles. The group groaned.

“Why does everyone in the 1920s love riddles so much?!” Tim exclaimed. Joey nodded in agreement before continuing. The answers to the riddles would match the numbers for the lock.

It didn’t take long for them to find the lockbox stashed underneath the desk in the corner. The tricky part was finding the riddles to unlock it. They searched all over the lounge until they felt like they had searched the entire ground floor. It was Eva and Selena who eventually found it in the last room they checked: the study.

Selena squinted as she tried to read the chicken scratch on the notepad. “Drop me from the highest building, and I’ll survive, but drop me from the lowest boat and I won’t.”

“A feather, maybe?” Eva suggested.

“Or paper, because-” 

“We’ll just try both,” LeLe shouted, cutting Tim off.

Tim tilted his head at LeLe. “Chill, girl…”

Selena kept reading the next riddle. They really didn’t have time for any more drama. “What is so delicate that even mentioning it breaks it?”

“A blanket, maybe?” Joey suggested. The rest of the group turned to look at him, dumbfounded. Thankfully, before everyone went into a tirade about the dumbest suggestion of the night, Joey came to the realization for them. “But you don’t really break a blanket do you…”

“Silence,” Eva said, “The answer is silence.”

“Right,” Selena continued, shaking that off, “If you give me food, I live. If you give me water, I will die.”

The group stared at each other, in deep thought.

“Fire!” LeLe finally shouted. 

They quickly counted the letters in the answers. Tim wasn’t fighting the smug expression on his face when paper was the right answer for the lock. 

Inside the chest was a single gold bar along with a note. It was a letter from Colin to his dad. He had been helping the other soldiers who were dealing with PTSD, although he didn’t have the word for it yet. He had been stuck on the top floor of the estate ever since they got back, so that is where they went.

No one was quite sure what to expect from Colin. Selena couldn’t help but picture a Gollum-esque creature crouching in the shadows whispering about its precious gold. It wasn’t the most realistic image, but reality got thrown out when the mermaid showed up.

  The one thing she didn’t expect was the young soldier pointing a gun at them as they rounded the top stair. The whole group started shouting and backing into the wall behind them. Even as his eyes flared at the sight of the gold bar, Colin’s hand never twitched.

“Who are you?” He demanded. “Have you come to steal my gold?”

“No, NO,” Selena insisted. She took a careful step towards the man. “Just lower the gun, and we’ll give the gold back to you.”

“I’m gonna lower this now.” Colin holstered his gun and immediately stretched his hand out for the gold. Tim slowly handed it to him. Colin snatched it from Tim’s hand and stared down at the gold.

“He is so hot…” Selena caught Eva whispering to LeLe in the back. LeLe wasn’t any better, practically drooling.

“Look, can you help us get out of here?” Joey asked, rolling his eyes at the two women.

Colin snapped out of his trance at the question. “Yeah, I can help you, but I’ll need my gear.” Colin grabbed an army jacket hanging from a nearby hook and slung it on as he marched ahead of them down the stairs. 

“Wait for me,” LeLe cried as she and Eva pushed themselves to the front. Oli and Selena caught a glance at each other before rolling their eyes again. 

“My captain probably thinks that I’ve gone AWOL,” Colin explained, ignoring the two women trailing behind him. “I’ll need to report back on the two-way radio out front. Stay behind me.”

Selena was confused. Didn’t Colin fight in World War I? They were supposedly in the 1920s. To the house, that apparently didn’t matter as gunfire rang out through the yard. The shouts of soldiers fighting and dying could be heard all around them. One came running towards them before Colin shot him down. They had waltzed into an active warzone. 

Luckily, the radio was a few feet away on the porch. The guests turned it on while Colin stood watch and covered them.

“Where the hell have you been, soldier?” a voice barked from the radio. “Some sensitive documents have fallen into enemy hands. They are being guarded by a sniper on the other side of the house. Get over there, take him out, and get those documents!”

“Wait, what,” Eva cried out. “I can’t take anyone out! I’m a Youtuber! I spend of my day sitting at a computer, I can’t-”

Her existential crisis had to be cut short as Colin made his way into enemy territory, forcing the others to follow. They crept along in the tree line for cover. Occasionally, Colin would take shots that were followed by distant screams.

They reached an open clearing that they had no choice but to cross. The light from the house shone down on them like the sun on a barrel of fish. The guests were barely half-way across the clearing when the gun fire started. Everybody ran except for Tim who threw himself on the ground as flat as he could. By some miracle, he managed to not get shot and rejoined the guests when the soldiers had to reload.

Colin stopped the guests behind some bushes looking out at a tower jutting from the corner of the house. Up in the window, the shadow of a sniper was barely visible. 

“It’s time to move in,” Colin stated. “Here.”

Eva froze as a grenade was thrusted into her hand.

“Wait, no, I can’t do this. I’m not trained to fight in a war! I’m not- AAHHH!” 

Eva’s protest was cut short as Colin pulled the pin on the grenade. The whole group cried in disbelief as Eva started running towards the open window at the bottom of the tower. The sniper tried to shoot her, but the angle was too low to get a shot. Eva chucked the grenade into the window. Her arms flailed as she ran away from the now smoldering tower.

The guests ran to inspect the rubble. Selena ran over to Eva. She started to ask if Eva was alright, but she could see how hard Eva was shaking. She tried to think of something to say, but there was nothing that could make this night seem better or even manageable. She took Eva’s hands in hers. She began taking deep, slow breaths and Eva, though they were wheezy, tried to replicate her. The two stood there until Eva’s breaths were in sync with Selena’s. Selena gently squeezed Eva’s hands before returning to the others.

It was a sight to see. Joey was waving a lighter over a metal briefcase with reckless abandon while Colin was leaning against the wall smoking a cigarette. LeLe and Oli looked at their wits end while Tim just tried not to touch the fire since he was the one holding the briefcase.

“What is he doing?” Eva asked Oli. 

“The briefcase says to burn before reading,” Oli explained, “Joey seems to think that that lighter will burn the suitcase, and the smoke will reveal a clue.”

“Like in Harry Potter?” Selena asked dumbfounded.

“Thank you!” Oli shouted with an exasperated sigh. 

Selena walked over and examined the briefcase. She ran fingers along the edge until she noticed something.

“Hey, wait, try turning this bit,” Selena pointed to a black strip on the briefcase. Joey put the light above it, and the strip melted to reveal numbers. 

Inside the briefcase were documents detailing Operation Heatwave: an experiment to create supersoldiers. Unfortunately, one of the subjects broke out and killed the doctor. They now had to retrieve the doctor’s research.

Colin cocked his gun and led them to the lab. Joey, Oli, and Selena entered as Colin did one last sweep on the outside. Unfortunately, as soon as the three entered, the door swung shut behind them. A large, unnaturally muscled man yelled, scaring them to the table on the opposite side of the room. Luckily, the man seemed to be chained to the wall. Unluckily, the chains didn’t look like they would hold him for long. They could hear the others yelling and trying to open the door, but it was stuck. They were on their own.

The three quickly started scanning documents while trying to block out the wails of the muscle man. There was a serum that would incapacitate the subject if they could find the ingredients. As Selena searched she began humming. It was a pitchy rendition of the lullaby her mother would sing to her. She didn’t even realize that she had started humming it. She did notice when the subject stopped shouting.

He was staring straight at Selena. He was just standing there, staring, his eyes glazed over. Oli looked up to see the display and turned to Joey whose eyes were starting to glaze as well. He quickly shook Joey’s shoulder, and the man came back to his senses as Selena stopped humming.

“What was that?” Joey asked.

“I…I don’t know. I was just-” Selena was cut off as the subject broke out his own trance and began shouting again. 

“Whatever it is, just keep doing it!” Oli shouted.

Selena nodded and turned back to the subject. She sang the lullaby in full, quietly at first, and then louder as the subject returned to his dazed state. Joey and Oli quickly found the vials and filled up the syringe on the table. Joey cautiously moved towards the subject and injected the serum into his next. He crumpled to the ground unconscious.

Behind him was a giant metal box. Selena and Joey grabbed it as Oli managed to wrench the door open.

The two dropped the box down on the grass as the rest of the guests ran back to them. Eva ran to Selena and looked at her quizzically. Selena was still catching her breath from the adrenaline still coursing through her system, but she managed to muster the energy to give a thumbs up. 

A loud clang resounded behind them. LeLe, the fire in her eyes burning brighter than ever, was banging on the box with a nearby shovel. It only took her a couple whacks for the box to fling open. Inside the box was a key and instructions for the inevitable. Two of them were going into battle. Take a wild guess how they were going to be chosen.

The guests made their way back inside the manor, the gunshots fading into the night. Almost out of instinct, Selena, Eva, and LeLe grouped together on one side of the room while Joey, Tim, and Oli did so on the other.

“So who are you thinking?” LeLe asked the other two.

“I’ll be honest, Tim has been kinda sketchy this whole night,” Eva pointed out. Selena found herself nodding along. There were very few people that Selena could in good conscience vote for. The only two left were Joey and Tim. A grim thought crossed her mind.

“Eva, you realize that you’re the only one here who hasn’t been voted in, right?” Selena mentioned. Eva looked confused for a moment before the reality of the statement dawned on her.

“I’m going to see what the guys are thinking,” LeLe said. As she stood up and walked over, Oli sat down and took her place. 

“Look, I’m going to be straight with you,” Oli said, looking directly at Eva, “Joey wants to vote you in.”

Eva put her head in her hands. Selena felt something boiling red bubbling inside of her.

“He’s been suspicious all night,” Oli added in a hushed tone. “He’s the one who invited us here. This is his house. Who's to say that he’s not in on it all?”

“I don’t know,” Selena pondered, “I think he’s more of a pawn if anything.”

“What makes you say that?” Eva asked.

Selena shrugged. “It’s more of a feeling, I guess.”

“It’s time,” Arthur announced, abruptly cutting off the conversation. The air changed as the voting began. They all felt it, but Joey was the one to put words to it.

“Guys, I feel bad about all of this,” he lamented, “No one here deserves to go through all of this.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have invited us here, then,” Oli replied.

“I didn’t-” Joey shouted before cutting himself off. He continued softly, “I didn’t know that any of this would happen.”

The nagging feeling that Selena had towards Joey yanked again. The house had chosen the two of them for this night. They had parts to play, but she didn’t know what Joey’s was yet. She didn’t even know what her own was. She just knew that she didn’t like it. Still, it was enough to convince her to write down Tim’s name instead of Joey’s.

Arthur shuffled the names in his hat. “Eva,” he announced. Selena squeezed Eva’s tense shoulder. “And Tim.”

“Son of a Bitch,” Tim cried out. The two followed Arthur back outside. 

Selena, Joey, Oli, and LeLe sat at the lounge. Nobody spoke. They had nothing left to say. They could continue to point fingers at each other, but that wasn’t going to get them out of the house. If they wanted a chance of getting out of the house, they couldn’t afford being at each other's throats. It wasn’t like it helped them any before.

The backyard doors swung open to reveal Eva. She ran past them to the shelf housing all the artifacts and the others followed. Eva was clinging onto the shelf like her life depended on it. Her whole body shook as she struggled to find a breath. 

“I don’t know how much more of this I can take,” she said, not turning around to face the others.

Oli placed a hand on her shoulder. “We just have two more owners. Then, it’s all over.”

The mantra repeated in all their heads. It was the anchor keeping them from going completely mad.

Two more…just two more…

[oh2e]

I was suddenly struck by the question of language - it's frequently stated that the Irish language never recovered from the Famine but Dr James Barry - having left Cork City around 1804 - wouldn't have been impacted by that.

Aidan Doyle wrote a fascinating piece on Language and Literacy in the Eighteenth and Nineteenth Centuries (published by Cambridge University in 2018). Simply put, his general belief was that everyone bar the very highest and lowest parts of society were bilingual, and even if people couldn't speak both languages they could often understand them. Most people who could read and write did so in English with little being written Irish though what was, was eagerly read much to the disappointment of the Church who were pushing only the Bible.

Dr Barry could write in English before leaving for the UK as demonstrated by the letter he wrote to James Barry RA on behalf of his mother. The Bulkeleys also came from Cork City where a large number of boats docked which suggests that they would have been more likely to know English anyway. But did he know Irish? Is there anything to suggest he didn't?

Several people described Barry as being "Scotch" in appearance and temperament. I wonder if this was at all impacted by his accent or dialect - did Barry improve his English while in Edinburgh and therefore pick up a Scottish accent and turn of phrase? Or did people mistake his Cork accent and Irish for a Scottish one and Gaelic? Did he even know Irish, coming from a family in Cork City where Irish would be less used? I like to think that he did.

[0613magazine]

150618 Nylon Magazine

Q: You received 1st place with this album. Congratulations.

A: Thank you. I’ve always said that we wanted to achieve #1 while having a comeback but we were only hoping, we didn’t have the confidence. We are happy that our hard work has paid off.

Q: How successful did you predict this album to be?

A: While preparing for it, we had a bet on the charts. The highest was 13th place and the lowest was 30th place. I think I put down for 20th? But suddenly we got into 1st and 2nd place, we were so surprised. On that day, during the dance practice, we were constantly checking the music charts. It was good. Haha.

Q: It’s a mini album but it has 9 songs. It seems that you have stressed a lot during the production of this album?

A: Of course. I always get stressed over the title of the songs. Especially ‘I Need You’, I had 7, 8 drafts for it. Yesterday, this plan seemed to fit well but then the next day, the other plan also seems to fit and people would suggest the other plans are good too. As this continues, I forget what I was trying to express with this song and the reason why I made this song, then I fall into mannerism. I’ve put a lot of effort into the titles this time.

Q: Where did you get the concept of the album from? How did it start?

A: First of all, the theme of “the most beautiful moment in life” is the anxiety and beauty of youth. We try to have new concepts with every comeback. Right now, we are focusing on what we can talk about. The song ‘이사’ is based on our experience of moving dormitory. I wrote ‘Converse High’ because I like girls who wears it. And all of that is a part of youth. I produced it because I think that is us.

Q: The title ‘화양연화’ means the most beautiful and happy moment in life. Is it now?

A: Actually, we hoped that using this title, this time of period will become the most beautiful moment in our lives. I was doubting that it might not work, but it’s fortunate that it is becoming the most beautiful moment.

Q: Apart from that, the solo mixtape which was released a month ago received a good response. It’s a shame that it wasn’t an album.

A: I feel the same. Of course, it had a good effect on the comeback. It felt like I was getting the attention but it doesn’t float my boat. The mixtape, 8 tracks were made by other people and I re-made it, so because of the copyright issues, it couldn’t be uploaded onto music websites. People unintentionally had interest in it and they even went on hip hop player to search for my mixtape and listen to it, it’s a difficult process. So after releasing the mixtape, I started to produce from the first track (of the album).  

Q: Being an idol as well as an artist that produces your own music, don’t you get confused with your identity?

A: I have got over that stage. Now, I don’t think about whether if I want to be an idol or not, or that I don’t know if I’m an idol or an artist. That kind of thought disappeared with the first mixtape. I don’t care about it now. I’m an idol to those who sees me as an idol but to those who sees me as Rap Monster, I can be an artist. Some people who may know me very well, I can be both at the same time. Or I can be nothing, I can just be a person that likes music. I think it depends on people’s point of view and it’s my duty to change their point of view. What I’m stressed about now is the direction (of my music). It is my first time in 8 years to make music from the very beginning. Starting from zero and making original work. It’s different from the vibe that I used to have. I get stressed over how can I show my music (in what ways can I show my music) I’m still thinking about it.

Q: The other members are the same but especially Rap Monster’s stage, it’s full of swag. The gestures when you rap, do you pay any special attention to them?

A: It’s funny that this topic was brought up again, but I can’t dance. I’m in the 6th place in the group (when it comes to dancing), the last place is Jin hyung, he’s a lot worse than me. Haha. That’s why I try to complement with gestures. My legs and arms are long so whatever I do would seem weird. I tried to cover up my weakness. I used to copy from others in the past, but now I just go with the flow, it feels great. Then I gradually make my own thing.

Q: I heard that before debut, you were promoting under the대남협 crew, What kind of influence did the crew have on you?

A: Musically, it boosted me a lot. Instead of saying that it influenced the direction of my music, it’s more of talented friends gathering together and seeing them makes me think that I need work hard as well. I’ve thought about “I need to do something” for many times. I think it influenced my intention/ purpose as someone that makes music.

Q: Have you thought about doing it again?

A: Of course. As I’ve been a trainee for a long time, I kept losing musical colleagues. I felt lonely, musically. Actually, I want to have a collaboration with female vocalists and I want to work with various of producers, but I only know the hyungs in our company. I’m not rich in human resources. It’s great that I’m doing well with the people that share the same feeling, but there are people who avoid contacting me as I’m an idol and a performer. So, if you read this interview, it doesn’t matter who or which company, it would be great if you can contact me. I feel lonely musically, I want to be influenced by anyone. Actually, I just want to talk about it. I want to talk with the people who likes music and make them listen to my work.

Q: So, which female vocalists do you want to work with?

A: I really like Yoonha sunbae-nim. Sweden Laundry and Kwon Jin-ah are also good. 

Q: Talking about music, there’s no way we can leave out lyrics, whether it’s BTS’ music or Rap Monster’s mixtape. Do you perhaps write other things apart from lyrics?

A: I write a lot.

Q: What kind of things do you mainly write about?

A: I got into music in the first grade of middle school, before that my dream was to become an author and a poet. I’ve always liked writing since I was young so I attended many literary contest and writing conventions. Now, I think it has met music and it’s presented in the form of rap. I write on memo notes, on twitter, or in letter forms on the fancafe. I also write some poems. So if I stopped making music in the future, I want to write. Because I started writing (before making music) so I want to go back to it. When I was in primary school, I wanted to go to the Literary Creative Writing class.

Q: You’ve written a lot of lyrics about the stress of being an adult and the society, as well as stress from the peer group. Is it okay to interpret that as a feeling of revolt towards the older generation?

A: I vent out antipathy towards the older generation through BTS’ music. And the mixtape is filled with antipathy towards the others. ‘Do You’ also has that kind of message. ‘Live your own way’.

Q: So, you are not speaking for anyone, right?

A: That’s right. I’ve come to realize that I do get to hear things like “I can do it so you can live your own way too, what’s there to worry about” but actually it’s a song that I want to hear so I wrote it. It’s not about me speaking for some people in order to help them, and then they will be self-conscious and start to live properly. Because I have been living in a confused state of mind so I wanted to pull myself together. And by looking around, the others were the same. They are confused everyday and getting bothered by other people’s words, so we need a song like this. I need it and you need it too. That’s how I wrote the song. It’s not writing out other people’s worries for them but it started from me and my worries.

Q: Is there a song that contains the same idea?

A: There is a song from BoA sunbaenim’s latest album called ‘love and hate’, I heard that it has the similar attitude to how I interacted with people when I was little. There’s a song in the mixtape called ‘Wanna Be Cool’. The content is that I don’t want to be cool. I think being cool is coward/ low. Ah, Urban Zakapa’s 힘들어 is also nice.  

Q: It’s still early to say this but what do you want to write about in the next album?

A: The word 이기적인 means ‘selfish’, personally I think it doesn’t matter how altruistic I am, I have a selfish side inside of me. It’s like thinking “it would be great to see the guy I don’t like fall over on the streets or get dumped by the girl that he likes”. With that kind of meaning, ‘selfish’ is just like a fish to me. If you split up the word, you have sel+fish and it reads as fish, right. So, I want to make a track that can talk honestly about how selfish and pathetic I am, with the theme of “there’s a fish named selfish that lives inside of me”.   

Q: BTS has the image of idols thathas nothing to hide. But it seems that mixtape’s Rap Monsteris someone who is reluctant about many things. Is that right?

A: There are many things. When I released the mixtape, the reaction was exactly how I expected it to be. I’m talking about “why do you have a strong sense of inferiority; why are you living in this way, getting bothered by other people’s words”. In the mixtape, it reflects on people with a lot worries and that has their own futile interpretations. The people that dislikes me, many of them have a strong sense of inferiority so they hate it. But that was me, till now it was me and I’m ending it through this mixtape. Because I also need to go through the process of accepting/ acknowledging myself.

Q: Suddenly, I’m getting curious of around when did you go through adolescence?

A: It feels like adolescence is eternal. 10 years ago and now has always been the same.

Q: So the start of adolescence was 10 years ago?  

A: It seems like it. When I was in 3rd, 4th grade in elementary school I started to worry about life and loneliness. So I read a lot of philosophy books. But there wasn’t anything that could solve it. It has remained the same for 10 years.

Q: Out of all the books you’ve read during this period, which one has influenced you?

A: I read Jeong Ho-Seung (poet)’s 수선화에게, 데미안 and 니체의 말 diligently. Actually, I’ve read quite a lot. But there isn’t a book that is about my life. And I wrote in my lyrics too, that I don’t really hate books about self-help books. At one time, I read a lot of those books, but you can’t impose your rules to anyone. Those books, their style of writing is pretty much the same, they tell you to “live this way”. It’s great that they tell you the ways, but I think the way they deliver the words can be dangerous. I’ve said in ‘Do You’ but I think having genres in life is a trap. Confined, classified, this is this and he belongs to that. Life is life and music is music, I don’t know why they need to classify it.

Q: Why do you think people like BTS and Rap Monster?

A: First of all, the reason they like BTS and me are quite different. If they only like me, then they also like my uneasiness and wanderings. I think they can feel that it’s a charm. Like “he’s the sexy brain guy and he’s intelligent, but the things he does is stupid, he’s being anxious like an idiot”. I think they can sympathize through that. And there are many reasons why people like BTS but first, good-looking guys coming out performing and singing as if we are destroying the whole world. It feels like catharsis. The things people can’t feel through going to work or school, but on stages, we spit out our feelings through our songs and dances. I think people can gain energy through watching our performances.

Q: Is there anything you want to say to Rap Monster and BTS’ haters?

A: I said “please change, why aren’t you changing?” to them up till few months ago. But now, I won’t say it. Just live in your own way. Just like ‘Do You’. I want to say that if you change (your mind), I can show you better things in return.

Scans: 취미는사랑

English Translation: KIMMYYANG

[bitterarcs]

The SOLDIERS are the abominations, and the Turks . . they're the diseased dogs. Even worse, they won't admit exactly how sick they are. A lifetime of insults worked through ears. The cruelest of which, occurring in the early years of his life, wormed their way into his mind, otherwise everything was second-hand at best. Parrots uttering the things shouted at their own self or heard in cranky drunken rants. From the moment Reno joined the Turks and donned the trademark suit ( only made trademark by association ), people's either admiration or fear for the mako-infused SOLDIERs amused time and time again when obvious disgust was tossed at the elite group of Turks. Did anyone actually know the quality work the Turks achieved? If someone was to spew biases, they should at least know first hand before casting ignorant assessments.

Reno could only imagine the expression of shock if any of the ignorant masses actually witnessed the kind of work the Turks accomplished. Or . . well, their malicious thoughts would be proved right. Reno heard the complaints, saw it in their eyes, and he felt it. Felt it in the vibration of flesh. The heat of muffled words and breath building and struggling behind fist. Thighs and knees were spread apart, comfortable despite the friction of pulling trouser fibres. Turk issued ebony shoes weren't precisely made for running or prolonged periods of standing, but the red head could have stood for an entire day as he watched the results of his work. Perhaps there was something to what people said even in ignorance.

Perhaps the masses could sense some sort of evil aura swirling about the Turks. Were miniscule devil horns peeking out from scarlet hairs? Reno grinned at the foolishness of his own thoughts while the body squirmed beneath him. Left hand was planted like a boat's anchor on the man's shoulder. Reno could feel it. Actually feel it. The hate and the fright coiling tight and being straggled behind his gloved fist. Left thumb moved from collar bone to adam's apple and applied a pressure to enhance the feeling of panic. The man with Reno's entire fist inside his mouth went crossed eyed. Barely enough room to suck in panicked air through mouth but not even to have excess blood and saliva pool out. Diseased dogs.

Lips curled into a satisfied smirk despite the straightening of his digits and the extraction of his fist from the man's mouth. Leather was ripped where teeth had tried to decimate his hand and one knuckle was broken, but all in all it had been worth it. Wistful sigh flittered out from parted lips. Shocking contrast to the sharp breaths and gags the bound man choked out. He stepped backwards from his straddling position just as the bound thug jerked his head forward to spew out abundant spit and blood. Truthfully, Reno didn't know what he liked better. Figuratively fist fucking a mouth, taking down a man twice his size by submission, or . . putting his mag-rod to work.

The work it was intended to do. At its highest voltage the mag-rod was capable of electrocuting a living thing, and at it's lowest setting it just fucking hurt. Swiftly, Reno bent down with exaggerated finesse and retrieved a weapon that was much like a fifth limb . . or sixth limb. Despite injuries to his right hand, the weapon was twirled around with an awe-inspiring ease considering the length and heft of the weapon. The tied thug was allowed to erratically breathe and spew out whatever was inside mouth and throat; two teeth and half a tongue dropped into lap. Reprieve, if that, was short lived however. Reno fiddled with the voltage of his weapon and then pressed the tip of the electro mag-rod against the exposed flesh of the thug's chest.

A dull pain at first, but even that caused the man's head to recoil as his body writhed with displeasure. The Turk kept the weapon pressed there, and the excitement in turquoise eyes mounted as the smell of burning flesh appeared before the sight of cooked flesh. A gurgled scream of nothingness like all the rest. Reno moved the mag-rod to admire the handy work of aggravated red flesh, then pressed the end to the man's thigh to char both material of pants and the flesh beneath him in a sickening, sticky mess. That was the thing about the electo mag-rod — just like Reno and the Turks, people underestimated its use. On the exterior wall, Rude lit up a cigarette and watched the trail of smoke drift away into the air. The gurgled screams of agony continued until they floated away, too.

032. — burns @gcldfanged

[newstfionline]

Friday, October 20, 2023

U.S. vetoes U.N. Security Council resolution on Israel, Gaza (Washington Post) The United States vetoed a U.N. Security Council resolution that condemned the Hamas attack on Israel, called for humanitarian pauses in all attacks to allow the delivery of lifesaving aid to civilians, and it called for Israel to withdraw its directive for civilians to evacuate the northern part of the Gaza Strip. In explaining the sole veto that caused the resolution to fail, U.S. Ambassador Linda Thomas-Greenfield cited its failure to mention “Israel’s right to self-defense,” and said the diplomatic process that is underway, including President Biden’s visit to Israel, should be allowed to “play out.” Twelve of the council’s 15 members, including close U.S. allies that voted in favor of the resolution, said it was urgently needed to address the humanitarian crisis and prevent the conflict from widening.

U.S. starts deportation flights to Venezuela, aiming to curb migration (Washington Post) U.S. immigration authorities Wednesday returned nearly 130 migrants to Venezuela, starting deportation flights Biden administration officials view as a crucial step toward reducing the record number of illegal crossings at the U.S. southern border. The deportations follow an agreement by the Venezuelan government to hold competitive elections next year, a deal that paves the way for the Biden administration to ease economic sanctions. The number of Venezuelan migrants crossing the U.S. southern border illegally has reached historic levels during the past several months. The influx has exacerbated strains at shelters in New York, Chicago and other U.S. cities whose Democratic mayors have been pleading for federal aid and have been increasingly outspoken in their criticism of President Biden’s border policies. Venezuelans who entered the United States illegally had faced little risk of deportation until now. Nearly 500,000 Venezuelans have crossed the U.S. southern border during the past three years, including about 50,000 taken into custody last month by U.S. agents, the highest one-month total ever.

Water level at Amazon port in Brazil hits lowest point in 121 years amid drought (Guardian) The water level at a major river port in Brazil’s Amazon rainforest has hit its lowest point in at least 121 years, as a historic drought upends the lives of hundreds of thousands of people and damages the jungle ecosystem. Rapidly drying tributaries to the mighty Amazon river have left boats stranded, cutting off food and water supplies to remote jungle villages, while high water temperatures are suspected of killing more than 100 endangered river dolphins. The port in Manaus, the region’s most populous city located where the Negro river meets the Amazon river, recorded a water level of 13.59 meters (44.6ft) on Monday, according to its website. That is the lowest level since records began in 1902, passing a previous all-time low set in 2010.

Eight French airports forced to evacuate for security reasons (CNN) On Wednesday, eight of France’s airports were shut down in response to bomb threats, with other key locations also closing due to security issues. The country’s Strasbourg, Nantes, Biarritz, Toulouse, Lille, Lyon-Bron, Nice, and Beauvais airports were all preemptively closed in order to allow security teams to clear them as France remains on its highest level of security alert in response to the conflict in Palestine. Other French landmarks closed down for security reasons include the Palace of Versailles (which has been shut down three times in less than a week) and the Louvre (which was closed for safety on Saturday).

Russia detains radio journalist accused of being ‘foreign agent’ (Washington Post) Russian authorities have arrested an editor for Radio Free Europe/Radio Liberty, an American news outlet based in Prague and financed by the U.S. government, accusing her of collecting information about the Russia military that could damage the nation’s security. The editor, Alsu Kurmasheva, holds dual U.S. and Russian citizenship and had traveled to Russia for family reasons. Her detention Wednesday in Kazan, southwestern Russia, follows the arrest of Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich, a U.S. citizen, who was seized by agents of the Federal Security Service in March and charged with spying—an accusation that his newspaper and the State Department strongly deny. Kurmasheva, who is based in Prague, also was charged with failing to register as a “foreign agent,” although she does not reside in Russia. She was initially detained in June, as she was waiting to fly out of Russia, after visiting the country for family reasons. Her employer, RFE/RL, has been designated a foreign agent by Russian authorities.

India uses widespread internet blackouts to mask domestic turmoil (Washington Post) Between 2016 and this May, India accounted for more than half of all the shutdowns recorded worldwide by an international coalition of more than 300 digital rights groups led by Access Now, a nonprofit. On more than 680 occasions during that period, state and local officials in India issued legal orders requiring the country’s handful of telecommunication companies to suspend mobile data transmission from cell towers and freeze wired broadband connections. Indian officials say the tactic is needed to combat unrest and prevent the spread of online rumors. But critics say the measures, more extensive than in any other country, stifle dissent, cover up abuses and impose a heavy toll on ordinary citizens. Since May, when ethnic bloodshed erupted in Manipur state, in northeast India, the state government controlled by Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) has enforced a draconian internet ban affecting the state’s 3 million people—one of the longest recorded shutdowns in the world—as violence between two ethnic groups spread from village to village, leaving more than 200 dead. In three visits to the remote, lushly forested state bordering Myanmar, Washington Post journalists saw how severing the internet upended daily lives and livelihoods practically overnight. Countless workers found themselves out on the street, and hospitals, with online payment systems suspended, struggled to keep operating. Moreover, the internet shutdown allowed the BJP state government—and the state’s ethnic Meitei majority who control it—to dominate the public narrative about the turmoil. It impeded efforts by dissenters among the Kuki ethnic minority to spread their message and disseminate photo and video evidence of human rights abuses. And it effectively kept the roiling conflict, a stark challenge to the BJP’s leadership, behind a veil of invisibility.

Xi, with Putin, says U.S. holding back Global South (Washington Post) Chinese leader Xi Jinping on Wednesday laid out a vision for a revamped version of his signature “Belt and Road” investment initiative and promised continued economic support for nations that sign on to China’s remade world order. With guest of honor Russian President Vladimir Putin, who shares his discontent with the Western-led world order, Xi presented the plan as an alternative route to riches than that offered by the United States and other industrial democracies, which he accused of holding back developing nations with trade sanctions and demands for political reform. It is a decade since Xi unveiled plans to rebuild the ancient Silk Road, and with it, reshape global trade and politics with China planted firmly in the center. His signature project has ballooned into a $1 trillion endeavor, but it is still only a loosely coordinated network of power plants, ports, roads and railways. In an effort to recast the initiative, Xi on Wednesday pledged a greener, higher-tech, more targeted and more interconnected phase of the project that would turn the “lowlands of development into the highlands of prosperity.”

Rebuffed by China, Philippines’ Marcos toughens line on contested waters (Washington Post) Philippine President Ferdinand Marcos Jr. was visiting a province outside the capital Manila last month when his national security adviser urgently contacted him: China had installed a floating barrier in part of the sea claimed by the Philippines. Should it be removed? Marcos’s decision was almost immediate, according to officials in his administration. He ordered the Philippine coast guard to cut the 300-meter-long barrier. The operation, captured on video released to the public by the coast guard, was seen as a surprisingly forceful move even by those who have been monitoring Marcos’s growing assertion of Philippine claims to sovereignty in the South China Sea. But his resolve to push back against China has been hardening over the past 10 months, fueled by continuing Chinese harassment and several instances when Philippine attempts at de-escalation have been rebuffed by Beijing, according to more than a dozen Western, Philippine, and other Asian senior officials and diplomats. Top aides in the Marcos administration have pursued a campaign to publicly expose Chinese incursions in this strategic part of the Pacific Ocean, which Filipinos call the West Philippine Sea. The response has been outrage domestically and among allies of the Philippines, further reinforcing the president’s approach, political analysts say.

On Israel’s northern border, Hezbollah missiles fly and civilians flee (Washington Post) One hundred fifteen miles from Gaza, Israel was racing to harden its border with Lebanon with forces, tanks and checkpoints, preparing for a potential second front in its war against Islamist militants. In small towns in the hilly border region, fears are rising that Hezbollah—the Shiite militia that is Lebanon’s most dominant political and military force—will join the fight, reports our colleague Steve Hendrix. The international community is straining to contain the risk of a wider battle, but a humanitarian crisis in Gaza amid punishing Israeli airstrikes is stoking anger across the Arab world and could push Hezbollah to escalate.

U.S. Response to Israel-Hamas War Draws Fury in Middle East (NYT) President Biden’s trip to Israel on Wednesday has put him in a region where grief and fury are mounting, not only toward Israel, but also toward the United States, the world power that has declared unyielding support for its chief Middle East ally. On Tuesday, widespread condemnation of Israel rippled across the region after a huge explosion at a hospital in the Gaza Strip killed hundreds of Palestinians who had been seeking treatment and refuge. Israel has denied being behind the blast, blaming a Palestinian group, Islamic Jihad, for a failed rocket launch. But even before that, many people across the region had come to view Israel’s war with Hamas as an American-backed massacre of Palestinian civilians in the blockaded territory of Gaza. Israel has cut off water, medicine and electricity in the enclave and continued to target Gaza with deadly airstrikes, bringing the death toll to at least 2,800 before the hospital explosion. Many Arabs view the American government as not only being indifferent to the agony of Palestinians living under Israeli occupation, but also complicit in it. American pledges of “ironclad” support for the country—and no-strings-attached security assistance—have stoked those feelings as Israel prepares for a ground invasion of Gaza.

Sunak follows Biden to Israel to show support (Reuters) Israel pounded Gaza with more air strikes on Thursday, as British Prime Minister Rishi Sunak followed U.S. President Joe Biden on visits to demonstrate support for war against Hamas while urging Israel to ease the plight of besieged Gazans. Biden, who spent less than eight hours in Israel, flew home on Wednesday night having pledged support, and hugged and consoled survivors of the Oct. 7 raid by Hamas gunmen. Biden said he had secured an offer from Egypt to allow 20 aid trucks to reach Gaza at some point in coming days, a fraction of the 100 per day that U.N. aid chief Martin Griffiths told the Security Council were needed. Israel said it would allow limited aid to reach Gaza from Egypt provided none of it benefited Hamas. But it repeated its position that it will open its own checkpoints to let in aid only when all of the more than 200 hostages captured by the gunmen were set free. Inside Gaza there was no let-up of the punishing Israeli bombardment that health officials say has so far killed nearly 3,500 people and wounded more than 12,000.

Why Egypt and other Arab countries are unwilling to take in Palestinian refugees from Gaza (AP) As desperate Palestinians in sealed-off Gaza try to find refuge under Israel’s relentless bombardment in retaliation for Hamas’ brutal Oct. 7 attack, some ask why neighboring Egypt and Jordan don’t take them in. The two countries, which flank Israel on opposite sides and share borders with Gaza and the occupied West Bank, respectively, have replied with a staunch refusal. Jordan already has a large Palestinian population. Egyptian President Abdel Fattah el-Sissi made his toughest remarks yet on Wednesday, saying the current war was not just aimed at fighting Hamas, which rules the Gaza Strip, “but also an attempt to push the civilian inhabitants to ... migrate to Egypt.” He warned this could wreck peace in the region. Jordan’s King Abdullah II gave a similar message a day earlier, saying, “No refugees in Jordan, no refugees in Egypt.” Their refusal is rooted in fear that Israel wants to force a permanent expulsion of Palestinians into their countries and nullify Palestinian demands for statehood. El-Sissi also said a mass exodus would risk bringing militants into Egypt’s Sinai Peninsula, from where they might launch attacks on Israel, endangering the two countries’ 40-year-old peace treaty.

[bloedelv-a]

𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐄 that thought there was an edge to the world , that past essos and westeros was but a lip one might go careening off should they travel too far . others thought the world might wrap around , that traveling past either shore would eventually bring them to the other in a matter of weeks , months , even YEARS depending on how fast they were able to travel . the former were quite content to stay where they were , not chancing their lives with whatever lay out there , while the latter never dared think of it should they be wrong . reality for all that lived in this part of the world was that westeros and essos were all there was , stretching as far as the highest point north and the lowest point south .

should any of them had managed a trip so daring , they may have sailed out to reach new lands , for the earth DID wrap around itself with realms in between . continents , countries that held other peoples and races they could nigh have dreamed about . magic still alive and flowing through the realm , creatures of varying shapes and sizes , and conflict that would make their quarrels for a throne look trivial . the grander scale wars may have finally come to an end , but there were still battles raging on . those that tore at the throats of oppressors and hateful ideologies worked tirelessly to one day live in a world where they would not fear for their lives anymore .

a dream iorweth fought hard for , managing to accomplish it on a smaller scale , yet large enough to bring hope for the rest . the option to finally rest had come to him when all was done , to cease fighting and live as he had wanted for so many others . he attempted and FAILED to find peace , leaving behind those that deserved and would appreciate it in favor of the clash of steel and taste of blood in his mouth . such things haunted his dreams yet he found himself unable to part from .

as the battles piled on , his travels stretched further east , eventually reaching the edge of the continent and a boat that promised travels to foreign lands . mages speculated there to be MORE than the edge of the world , lands and riches waiting to be claimed if one dared to venture so far . had he not driven himself into a corner , iorweth would have turned and traveled back the way he came . yet wanted DEAD by many states , countries , and empires and few friends to rely on this far away , he found himself with little else to choose from . managing to find a seat onboard , the elf journeyed and wondered if the rumours were true or if death awaited him .

he would never know what gods must have intervened to keep him alive and in one piece , all other passengers and crew aboard the ship dead and lost out in the unknown sea . while the ship broke apart and sank to the ocean floor , iorweth washed ashore . once more , with few choices to pick from , he gathered himself and walked on .

[college-girl199328]

What one region's water level woes reveal about climate change and the St. Lawrence River

Strolling along the shore of his home on Ault Island, about 30 minutes west of Cornwall, Ont., Cliff Steinburg points to the end of his dock. He says this summer there was less than a foot of water there, making it impossible to launch a boat. While the river has since stabilized, Steinburg worries what next year will bring to a region known for its fishing, beaches, and boating.

"This area cannot suffer through another season like we did," Steinburg said. "It's going to have a major effect on tourism. It's going to have a major effect on all of us living here."

The St. Lawrence Seaway is an economic powerhouse; not only the lifeblood of local life and tourism in the many towns that overlook its shores, but a major trade artery relied on for commercial shipping between Montreal and Lake Ontario.

But the river is changing. Steinburg lives in a particular section of the river known as Lake St. Lawrence. The region was flooded in the late 1950s so that commercial ships could bring their cargo further upriver and inland.

Located directly upstream of the international Moses-Saunders Power Dam, Lake St. Lawrence's water levels drop when the dam opens, so that water can flow from Lake Ontario downstream to Montreal.

While the area has always been vulnerable to some water level fluctuations for that reason, Steinburg said that in his two decades living there he has never seen levels as low as they were in the summer of 2022.

According to public data from the International Lake Ontario-St. Lawrence River Board, Lake St. Lawrence dropped below the lowest minimum ever recorded multiple times over the last few years, in May 2020, May 2021, and July, August, September and October 2022.

Those seesawing water levels may get more dangerous. Engineers and scientists are warning communities around the Great Lakes to prepare for a future with more extreme water level fluctuations.

A report published this year by Natural Resources Canada warns that "climate change may affect net water supplies" to the Great Lakes and the St. Lawrence River over the next few decades.

"We're likely to see higher highs and lower lows on both ends of the scale," said Frank Seglenieks, Canadian co-secretary of the Lake Ontario — St. Lawrence River Board, which regulates the flow of water through the Moses-Saunders Power Dam.

"We have about 100 years of water level data in the Great Lakes and over the past 10 years, some of the lakes have seen both their lowest levels and their highest levels just within the last 10 years," he said.

In a recent analysis, Seglenieks found that if the global average temperature increased by more than 2.5 C, the range between the average monthly minimum and maximum levels in Lake Ontario could grow by as much as a metre — from about two metres to about three meters. Those fluctuations would trickle down to the St. Lawrence River as well.

Jeff Ridal, a research scientist and the executive director of The River Institute in Cornwall, Ontario, said the Lake St. Lawrence region may be a "canary in the coal mine."

"This is the reality that we have to accept … in the end communities will have to adapt," Ridal said. Acceptance is a challenge to come by, especially among residents who are seeing beloved local ecosystems change.

Avid fisher John Sliter, who is the president of The Friends of Hoople Creek Society, is especially concerned about the walleye population. He said the area around Hoople Bay has been drying up. However, it's part of the annual spawning route taken by fish who swim from the St. Lawrence River upstream to Hoople Creek.

"When I was a young child growing up on Hoople Creek … there were thousands of fish that used to migrate up the creek to spawn," Sliter said. "When I walked back to the bay this past summer, it was nothing more than a field. As far as you could see it's dry land, and I found a few remnants of dead fish."

He fears many fish aren't making it up the creek to spawn before it dries out in the spring. As for those that do make it in time, Sliter said he has seen some of their eggs rotting in the sun.

"It's quite devastating," he said. Potential ecological impacts are being studied by The River Institute. Ridal said they are especially concerned about the fact that river levels are dropping earlier and earlier in the summer.

While so far research hasn't shown any significant differences in fish populations, Ridal said it may take time for the data to catch up with what is a relatively new phenomenon.

Steinburg and many other locals believe it's the responsibility of the board that manages the Moses-Saunders dam to adjust its operation to make water levels more consistent.

"I think it can be better managed, if you want my honest opinion," said Steinburg, who is a member of the public advisory group that suggests improvements to the dam's operation.

South Stormont Mayor Bryan McGillis agrees more needs to be done. He's concerned about the economic fallout in his community, not to mention the impact on home values.

"We don't need to be sacrifice lambs here," he said. "We really need our water where it is, because this is a tourist area and it's paramount that people still come to this community for our businesses."

The Moses-Saunders Power Dam management plan — and how it can be adapted to climate change — is currently under review. While there is hope that some adjustments can be made for a future with more extreme weather patterns, Seglenieks warned there are limits to what can be done.

"The water that comes into the system, that's determined by Mother Nature. All we can do is change the regulation plan a little bit to try to balance it," he said. That balancing act is a challenge. This is because releasing less water from the dam during a dry spell may keep water levels higher for residents upstream, but it has consequences downstream.

"It could reduce the water level at the Port of Montreal so low that container ships couldn't actually come in, and that would shut down the shipping industry, which is worth billions of dollars a day," he said.

Ridal agrees there is no easy answer. "We need a whole gamut of possible ways of dealing with these issues … hopefully improvements to water level management plans, but at the same time I think communities will have to take steps to better protect shorelines … and even adapt so they ensure that they can get their boats in the water."

Some of those adaptations are already underway. The St. Lawrence Parks Commission is investing millions in adapting local marinas and campgrounds to the upcoming reality.

Mike Pratt, park operations assistant manager with the St. Lawrence Parks Commission, said that by building breakwalls, dredging and building new boat ramps designed for more extreme water fluctuations, they hope to be better prepared for whatever the future holds.

"Nobody has a crystal ball, but we're doing our job and we're listening to the experts," he said. But residents like Sliter and Steinburg worry that if water fluctuations get more severe, their region will get the short end of the stick. This is because dam authorities try to balance the needs of towns upriver and downriver, along with the pressures of the shipping industry.

"We're the weakest link if you will, or the link that can be sacrificed," Sliter said. "We want to fight for the protection of our area and we want to fight for the protection of the fish and the wildlife."

[collectormains]

Easy pass staten island

#Easy pass staten island drivers

#Easy pass staten island free

Average Altitude: 55.0 feet Latitude: 40 degrees / 36 minutes N Longitude: 74 degrees / 10 minutes W Highest Point: Todt Hill (410 feet above sea level) Lowest Point: Sea Level Area 60.9 square miles/38,507 acres 13.9 miles long 7.3 miles wide (extreme breadth) 57 miles of waterfront History Richmond County is one of the five boroughs of New York City. New Jersey Transit’s North East Corridor has stops on this line, and Amtrak has a stop at this facility which allows travelers the opportunity to choose destinations to many cities all around the United States. METROPARK STATION Staten Island is a short drive away from Metropark Station, a train station located in nearby Iselin, N.J.

#Easy pass staten island free

There are several hotels on Staten Island with some offering free shuttle service to the airport. AIRPORT Newark International Airport is less than 10 miles away from Staten Island, allowing travelers a quick ride back and forth to the borough. 11, 2019, the Bayonne Bridge’s main span roadway opened featuring two, 12-foot-wide lanes in each direction, as well as outside and inside shoulders. As part of the Bayonne Bridge Navigational Clearance Project, also known as “Raise the Roadway,” construction on the span began in 2013 and elevated the deck of the Bayonne Bridge from 151 feet to 215 feet in order to accommodate larger, 21st-century container ships that were unable to fit under the bridge’s previous configuration.

The Bayonne Bridge, which connects to Bayonne, N.J., and Port Richmond, was completed in November 1931 and was the world’s longest steel-arch bridge for 45 years.

A cashless tolling system for the span was introduced in April 2019.

The Outerbridge Crossing, which opened to traffic on June 29, 1928, connects Perth Amboy, N.J., with Charleston.

It also boasts “smart bridge” technology, which essentially means that the bridge’s structures are continuously monitored by sensors at “critical points.” The $1.5 billion cable-stayed bridge was completed in 2018 and features twin spans that each have three 12-foot wide lanes, 12-foot outer shoulders, and five-foot inner shoulders.

The Goethals Bridge spans the Arthur Kill, linking Elizabeth, N.J., with the Howland Hook area of Staten Island.

The Verrazzano-Narrows Bridge connects Staten Island to Brooklyn.

All E-ZPass tags on the account apply to the three trip minimum requirement. If one or two trips are taken, the customer pays the prevailing E-ZPass peak rate of $13.75 per trip or off-peak rate of $11.75 per trip (plus $10.50 for each additional axle beyond two axles). The Staten Island Bridges Plan toll rate is $6.88 per peak or off-peak trip (plus $10.50 for each additional axle beyond two axles) at the Bayonne Bridge, Goethals Bridge, or Outerbridge Crossing, provided at least three Staten Island-bound trips are made in a single calendar month that are not otherwise discounted by the Green Pass Plan.

Bayonne Bridge, Goethals Bridge, and Outerbridge Crossing The Port Authority New York/New Jersey Staten Island Bridges Plan (PASI) is available to vehicles with non-commercial plates and private E-ZPass accounts at E-ZPass New York or New Jersey.

#Easy pass staten island drivers

Verrazzano-Narrows Bridge Drivers with an E-Z Pass pay $6.55 (versus the $19 cash rate) while the Staten Island Resident E-Z Pass fee is just $2.75.For more info, visit BRIDGES & TOLLS There are four bridges that extend into Staten Island with E-Z Pass discounts available for Staten Island residents. Shuttle buses are expected to regularly pick up commuters from the West 39th Street stop, and one-way ferry trips on the system’s existing routes cost $2.75 with options for 30-day passes. Commuters will be able to ride the boat for about 18 minutes to Battery Park City near Vesey Street, or for 30-35 minutes to get up to 39th Street on the Westside. The dock will contain a 160-foot pier and detached 80-foot gangway that will connect the pier to a floating barge, also being constructed on Staten Island, where boats will pull up. Scheduled for completion this summer, the site is the future home of a fast ferry dock that will be part of the NYC Ferry system and will provide Staten Islanders with an alternate transit option across the Hudson Bay into Manhattan. Regional/Statistical Information & Transportation Altitude & Location schedule, visit FAST FERRY The New York City Economic Development Corporation (NYCEDC) announced in March they were beginning construction on a much-anticipated fast ferry, located next to the Staten Island Ferry in St. Staten Island Chamber of Commerce SI Chamber Of Commerce Guide:

[burr-did-nothing-wrong]

So you’re saying Adams threw shade first and Jefferson responded in kind?

Damn, Adams really never learned his lesson on ‘talk shit get hit’ did he?

What did he and Burr think of one another?

I honestly can't find anything on this. I know that Adams recognized Burr as one of the political figures who fell victim to Hamilton. 

Adams wrote:  This Creature [Hamilton] was in a delirium of Ambition; he had been blown up with Vanity by the Tories, had fixed his Eye on the highest station in America, and he hated every Man young or old, who stood in his Way, or could in any manner eclipse his laurells or rival his Pretentions, Col Smith Coll Burr Mr Jay, Mr Madison Mr Jefferson Adams and Washington were but a part of those who were envied by him.

But I did find something about John Quincy Adams and Burr. He felt it was very improper for Burr to serve as president of the senate following Hamilton’s death. Despite this, Burr ended up charming JQA and his family when they ran into each other on a boat trip from Baltimore to Philadelphia. 

In her diary, Louisa admitted that she “felt a sort of loathing for this Col Burr,” yet within a few hours of meeting him she said that “he appeared to fascinate every one in the Boat down to the lowest Sailor and knew every bodies history by the time we left— He was politely attentive to me . . . At Table he assisted me to help the Children with so much ease and good nature that I was perfectly confounded.”

From The Adams Papers Editorial Project;

When relaying the event to his brother, John Quincy wrote, “Whether the original seducer of mankind, has embodied himself in the person of the little ex-vice, I am not competent to pronounce— This I will say; that I defy Man, Woman or Child, so to withstand the powers of his fascination, as to part from him after such a transitory association, without feelings of good-will towards him.”

After a particularly rough passage—so rough, in fact, that at one point Louisa rolled out of her high berth and onto the floor—the Pennsylvania soil was a sweet sight to the passengers. Taking pity on the sleep-deprived parents of fussy young children, Burr swooped in, taking little John Adams II in one arm, taking Louisa’s luggage in the other hand, and offering her his arm to disembark. John Quincy followed behind them, George Washington Adams in his arms, his jaw on the gangplank.

“It was all done with so little parade and with such entire good breeding that it made you forget that he was doing any thing out of the way,” Louisa recalled. “He talked and laughed all the way and we were quite intimate by the time we got to Philadelphia where he called to see us, and this the first and last occasion on which I ever saw this celebrated man.”

After two weeks’ rumination, John Quincy summed up the experience by writing, “I had not strength of mind enough to retain in their full inflexibility the resentments even of Virtue— I felt a degree of compassion for the Man, which was almost ready to turn to Respect— He was more than barely civil to me and my family— I could not help feeling for him in return more kindness, than I was willing to acknowledge to myself—infinitely more than I suffered myself to shew him; and perhaps more than is justly consistent with that character which on a cool and distant estimate I cannot help believing to be his.”

[whatdoesshedotothem]

Wednesday 20 December 1837

9 ¼

11 55

very rainy night and morning and F48 ½° at 10 ¼ am and breakfast in about ½ hour – stood reading till about 11 (Walsh’s journey from Constantinople) when A- called to witness and I did witness Howarth’s signing his agreement (and A-‘s signing it also) for the house at Smithy-stake now occupied by Hartley – present rent £12.12.0 Howarths’ rent £14 clear per annum then with A- and with Robert the York joiner till after 12 taking down the large old bed in the quondam buttery where Edward the footman sleeps to make way for the turn-up-bed now in the drawing room and for Georges’ little bed (too damp in the tower low closet) – then with A- at luncheon and had Mr. Jubb about 1 to see Cookson, Susan and Sarah – about 1 ¾ John Booth came to say the water was running over the meer-embankment – had just sent him for Joseph Mann (Robert gone to the Whiteworth Doctor at Todmorden) when Sam Booth brought word that Mawson was at the meer, and begged me to send all the men I could muster – sent Sam, and Robert Sharpe the mason and Gray the masons’ labourer (leaving John Sharpe at the Laundry drying closet) and desired Sam to get all Joseph Mann’s men – I staid with Robert the joiner getting the bed out of the drawing room and moving the plate cupboard about in the buttery till about 2 ¾ then seeing a rush of water from under the rockbridge went 1st to the Low fishpond across the road – should have been over boot-tops in passing under the bridge – a perfect torrent running down by the great sycamore into the Low fishpond besides all that the drain from the upper fishpond could take – the low fishpond running near the cistern in a torrent down the cave and bridge archway – the upper pool running over in a fine cascade upon the chair-rock also forming another cascade and into the 2nd highest pool, and from that into the lowest pool but one – the foot square drain could not contain the water – it burst up just below the walnut tree, and all was torrent down the fields joined by another tho’ smaller torrent from the turret drain – which entered the meer walk just below the rustic chair and made one rude stream down into the meer – it must have been 3 when I got there – the embankment between the bye wash and boat-house creek (very near to the latter) had burst and the water was lowered nearly down to the bottom of the meer-goit leading to the water wheel – the roots of the large oaks near the bye wash were washed bare – about a couple of hundred yards cube of stuff were washed away – great blocks of coal-rag laid bare – the whole of the Ings like a sea the water had been 3ft. deep over the Sown holme Chaussée but was now lowered there to about a foot – the lower part of the walk deluged – the palisade tops just peeping out of the water – Jack Green and his father-in-law were staring in mute astonishment – and I said not much for Mawson and all my men were gone home – a couple of the colliers were there – had narrowly escaped being drowned in the low mine – only just escaped the rush of water – but my mason? and man had drawn up the bye-wash clow just before my arrival – stood musing over the scene of devastation – Thomas Pearson came – the water had then left the chaussée just bare, and we walked over it, and up coffin lane by Lower brea to Mitham – the water much abated – for ½ our before P- had thought Mitham bridge in danger – the Mitham Ing a sea, and all along the Ings below – P- said there was such a flood just after Mitham mill dam was finished by George G- (in 1829?) – I never saw such a one before – Sam brought word this evening that Dumbmill bridge was washed away and much damage done at H-x returned home very wet (rained incessantly all the day) about 4 – dressed – had Robert doing 2 or 3 little jobs putting up clothes-pegs in my drawing room closet and I afterwards getting things put away in it till about 6 ½ - then a little while with A- who went to Cliff Hill at 3 ½ and returned at 5 – dinner at 7 5 – tea at 8 – read the newspaper – A- read French – came upstairs at 10 and till near 11 wrote all the above of today having 1st washed inkstand etc Cookson had 100 leeches this afternoon on her side, and Sarah the kitchen maid 6 on her temples, and she and Susan the housemaid very poorly this evening – thoroughly rainy windy day and evening and wind whistling and very wet night – F41° at 10 pm

[ourplaceinthecosmosphff]

Chapter 25: Timing

‘my soul chose yours and a soul doesn't just forget that’ - b. m.

Lourdes showed up right then. We stepped away from each other, startled, struggling to look like we weren’t caught doing something wrong.

Lourdes didn’t seem to notice.

“There you are!”‌‌ She smiled. “Finally made it out?”

I‌ looked down, shyly.‌ “Yes. I‌ was just about to go back in.”

“What? Why? Let’s get out of here before someone comes to find you to do more work.”

I‌ smiled.‌ “Lou, I‌ have to work.”

She rolled her eyes, and looked at Harry. “This used to be our favorite holiday. We don’t live here, but the Palace is full of little secret places. We should take Harry on a tour.”

“I’d love that.” He said. “Palaces are fun when I don’t have to live in them.”

Lourdes laughed.‌ “Where should we start?”

“Again, I–I have to work.”

Lourdes gave me an exasperated look. “Stop, the day is basically over.”

“You know there’s a black tie dinner tonight, right?”

She sighed. “Tonight! Hours away! Besides, if they really need you, they’ll come find you.”

“I don’t know…”

“Harry, some help?”‌ She grinned at him. “You want Maggie to come, right?”

He looked at me, and sighed, longingly. “Always.”

There was no going back after that.

I ‌grabbed my shoes and ran towards the opposite end of the hallway, away from the reception hall. 

“Fine, but let’s run before someone catches us.”

We took the staff’s passageways to avoid being seen while we made our way. Unlike the rest of the Palace, they were mostly all old cement and industrial lights, with wooden or backsplash floors that needed fixing. Places that weren’t seen by the people who ‘mattered’, only used by servants to stay out of the family’s way or make their way faster through the palace.

The spiral, stone steps were steep upwards to the Clock tower. We climbed it slowly, out of breath from the long walk. The Clock tower wasn’t meant as a place to be visited; as we explained to Harry, though the Clock was now a hugely popular touristic attraction, it was created to be functional, and the tower where it was situated merely a place for maintenance.

Therefore, it was simple. A round room of barely even wooden floorboards and high top ceilings. Clean, but empty. Across from the door we walked through was the clock; it’s lowest end was below the floor we were on, and it’s highest point out of reach even to Harry in all his height.

“I don’t know why but I pictured it a lot smaller.”‌ Harry noted, leaning on the railing separating the room from the clock itself. 

Standing by his side, I‌ pointed down to the river below. 

“Perfect view.”‌

He smiled.‌‌ “Can they see us?” He asked, reasonably, noticing the public gathering to watch the boat parade and the separate stand for the press.

“Nope.”‌ I‌ told him. “It’s mirrored glass outside.”

“Nice.”‌ He knocked his shoulder on mine, lightly, making inexplicably blush.

“Shall we?”‌, Lourdes asked, kicking off her flats.

“Lourdes, we have a perfectly good view from here.” 

She ignored me, instead sneaking below the railing to edge herself forward, holding one of the metal bars securing the clock in place to pull herself up. She quickly climbed the railing and stepped forward.

“What–woah–”‌ Harry stepped back as my sister climbed up onto the clock. 

The old clock had several metal structures securing it in place, as well as all the other important and ornamental parts. The pointers, for example, were held together by two metal bars shaped like an X, which had a smaller circle inside connected to the engines. The X and the circle, my siblings and I had found as children, formed an almost perfect climbing hole.

“Come on!”‌‌ Lourdes called, impatient.‌ “What are you guys waiting for?”

“Is that… allowed?”‌ Harry asked, almost whispery.

I‌ gave him a cheeky grin. “Are you really afraid of breaking the rules? You, of all people?”

“Fair. But, you know, I’m a guest here.‌‌ I‌ already kidnapped their princesses, I‌ don’t want to give your family more reason to hate me.”

“Are you chickening out?!”‌, Lourdes called, already climbing into the top part of the circle.

“We’re fine here.”‌ I‌ told her, who then made chicken sounds at us.

“I‌ expected that from Harry, British and all, but you’re Savoyen, Maggie. You’re made of stronger stuff!”

“Lou–”

“Okay, that’s it.” Harry said, peeling off his coat and suit jacket, starting to fold his long sleeves past his elbows.

“I–”‌‌‌ I‌ stuttered, remembering to look away from his arms, “You–you don’t have to, you’ll get dirty from the dust.”

Lourdes made chicken noises again.

Harry sighed.‌ “You understand.”

Before I could say no, he threw one over the railing, where he sat and pulled himself up, standing on top of it, starting to look around at the metal bars to try and figure out where he should go next.

“Lourdes, if he falls, I’ll tell Papa it’s your fault.”

She shrugged. “It’s a risk I’m willing to take.”

Harry laughed, loosened his tie, and climbed up. 

“Are you coming?”‌ He asked, looking at me, a joyful smile in his lips.

“She can’t…”‌ Lourdes mocked, in a sing-song voice, “She’ll be queen one day!‌ What will the church say?!”

“I am wearing a dress,‌ Lourdes-Abigail!” I‌ complained, as Harry laughed, amused.

“You do every year, yet I‌ can’t help but notice this is the only year you seem to be struggling with that.”

I ‌sighed, knowing I couldn’t tell her it wasn’t about my title, but about not wanting Harry to see me losing all composure in order to climb into a clock like a child. 

But… Harry was there, too. And it was very fun. So I‌ undid my belt and removed my overcoat, placing it along Harry’s in the railing, to the side, leaving my shoes near it, too. Now wearing my short-sleeved, simple black dress, I sat on the railings facing the door and turned to the clock, one leg at a time, trying to maintain some sort of etiquette. 

The hard part came with getting to my feet, for which I‌ had to raise one leg first. If I did it on the other side, I wouldn’t have the metal bars to pull myself up; if I‌ did it on this side, I would essentially showcase my underwear. This wasn’t a problem I‌ had had when it was just my siblings with me.

Harry was watching me, uncertain, trying to figure out a way to help.

I‌ sighed. “Would you look away, please?”

“What?”

I sighed, blushing. “I am wearing a dress.”‌

“Oh.”‌ It was now his turn to blush slightly, turning to face the river. “‌Of course.”

I‌ pulled myself up swiftly, only almost slipping in the railings because of my stockings.‌ Then, I‌ took the small step into the bottom part of the metal circle, where, inexplicably, Harry still was. Because it was a circle, and I was wearing stockings, though I had tried to step to the side of him, as to keep my distance, I slid slightly and almost fell, but Harry was quick to wrap his arms around me.

“Oops, there you go.”‌ He said, as we chuckled, as if his arms around me didn’t send shivers through my whole body.

“You need to keep climbing, we can’t both stay here.”‌ I‌ said, enjoying the proximity more than I should.

“Okay, but I don’t know how!” He explained, exasperated. 

“There, that side. Use the bar to pull yourself up and hoister your body into the next arm of the X.”‌ I explained as he loosed his hold on me to turn around and do as I said, but as he was wearing socks, he, too, slid back into place. Now it was my arms around his muscled back.

We laughed.

“I’ll just stay here.” He said.

“At what age should I‌ expect to become so completely physically useless?”‌ Lourdes complained from above us.

“Good God, she’s brutal.” Harry whispered, with an amused laugh. 

“It’s the teenage hormones.” I‌ explained, smiling. “She’ll grow out of it.”

“I‌ heard that.”‌‌ Lourdes said. “And just because you said it, I’ll make it a point to become even worse as I‌ grow up.”

“Why don’t you help?”‌ I asked her, laughing; “We can’t all be junior athletes.”

Sighing, she leaned down and offered Harry a hand. “Come on, I’ll pull you up, but you have to use your legs.”‌‌ She said. “And it’s ex-athlete.”

Harry held her hand and took an impulse to hoister himself up to the next section of the X.

After he had settled in place, he heaved a long sigh, and asked: “Why ex?”

“I haven’t skated since last year.”‌ She explained.

“You can always go back.”

“It’s not how it works… You don’t recover that much time away… besides, my trainer’s contract is about to run out. When it does, he’ll move on and train someone else.”

After I‌ had climbed up into the opposite section to Harry, I‌ looked at him. We shared a look of worry over this, but, much like me, he also seemed lost as to what to do.

“Oh, it’s starting!”‌ Lourdes exclaimed.

We followed her finger to see a large vessel of the Navy making its way down across the river. On top of it, soldiers lined up perfectly, saluting. 

Ship after ship, bigger, smaller, weirdly shaped, with cannons, old and new, made their way through the river, some shooting empty cannon balls up to the sky to the cheering crowds. Some holding bands in perfect formation playing our national anthem. 

“So,” I started, after we’d been in silence for a while, “how much better is our Clock to your London Eye?”

Harry grinned. “I will not dignify that question.”

“Because you know it’s so much better?” Lourdes asked.

“Because the answer should be obvious.” He replied, amused.

“Because you know it’s so much better.” She affirmed, confident.

“No!” He protested, making us laugh.

Another ship went by, this one releasing a show of fireworks. We stayed silent, listening to the thunderous sound.

“Louis found this place.” Lourdes said. “Do you remember, Maggie?”

I smiled at the river. “Oui… A lifetime ago.”

After the last ship had passed by to the sound of excited applause by the cheering crowds, we all released tired sighs almost at the same time, and remained silent for a minute just appreciating the movement of the people below.

“They’ll be looking for us.” Harry said, eventually.

“Yeah.” I agreed.

No one moved.

“You should come back.” Lourdes said, to Harry. “Some time when there’s no big event, just to visit. That way we have more time to show you around. And you should come to Callois, or Haydell! Those are the best Palaces.”

He was smiling at her. “Well, I’d be happy to come back. It sounds fun. It… it might be hard to justify it without a proper reason.”

“Can’t the reason be you were invited?”

He looked pensive. “I… I guess it can?”

“Well, then you’re invited. Isn’t he, Maggie?”

They looked at me. I felt a knot of… not anxiety, something lighter in my stomach.

I smiled at Harry. “I… We’d love to have you.”

He smiled, softly, at that.

Lourdes looked back down at the river, listing all the things in Callois and Haydell she wanted to show Harry, but his eyes didn’t leave mine. They were full of yearning and heavy with the weight of all that wasn’t being said – it was hard to look away. It made me want to cry.

“Hello?!”

I shook my head, looking at my sister. “What?”

She sighed, annoyed. “I asked… how much money do you have on you right now, Harry?”

He seemed confused, as I’m sure I did. “Uh. I don’t know?”

“Will you give me all of it if I can hop off from up here without using my hands or arms at all?”

“Lourdes-Abigail…” I started.

“Mind your business, Maggie.” She interrupted. “You’re not allowed an opinion as you have insider knowledge on this matter.”

I sighed. Harry just seemed even more confused.

“No hands or arms?” He asked.

“Surely, you’re not considering this.”

“How much money?” She asked again.

Grinning now, he picked his wallet from his back pocket and went through it.

“Uhm… sixty pounds.”

“Not euros? Ugh, fine. It’ll do. Do we have a deal?”

“Well, I’m very intrigued, so yes.”

Perched up on the upper arch of the metal circle, Lourdes turned to the side and started to slide down, arms crossed in her chest. When she reached the first arm of the X, she used the metal connection to the wall to slide around it, and sit again on the circle on the other side. From there, she pressed her feet against the wall using it to keep her steady against the metal of the circle as she slid down, the circle now to her back, quickly reaching the lower leg of the X. From there, she was able to take a bit step onto the railing and jump down to the ground, turning around to us and throwing her arms in the air, to then slowly curtsey in victory.

Harry and I chuckled, amused. Harry slow clapped. He leaned down and handed her the money.

“Well earned.”

“Thank you.” She took another curtsey, smug.

“What was that, the ballet, gymnastics, or the skating training?”

She shrugged, counting the money. “All of it combined, I guess.”

“Impressive.” Harry said, giving me a quick look before going on. “Why are you quitting, again? That much talent shouldn’t go to waste.”

She sighed. “I just… I don’t know, I don’t like it as much anymore.”

“You haven’t skated since last year, you said so yourself.” I reminded her. “Maybe you just don’t remember how much you like it.”

“Whatever, it’s done.” She shrugged. “Ivan’s contract is about to expire anyway.”

“Hey, Mary.” Harry called. For a moment, my heart skipped a beat to him using the old ‘nickname’.

“Yes?”

“Didn’t you say you always wanted to get proper skating lessons?”

I stared at him, confused. 

“I… did?” I said, trying to pass the question as an answer. Lourdes was looking at me, brows raised.

“You did?” She asked. “You hate ice skating.”

“No, I don’t.” I dismissed. “I just… I don’t love it, because I’m not great at it. But, maybe if I had lessons…”

Lourdes scoffed, mocking, but looked away to put her money in her pocket.

I exchanged a quick look with Harry, who shrugged, nodding excitedly. It wasn’t a… bad plan. It was just an unusual one. But, maybe it was time for desperate measures.

We heard steps on the stairs, and all looked at the door, expectantly, as if being caught mid-mischief which, in a way, we had been.

From it emerged Auguste, breathless.

“Ma’am.” He sighed. “The–the King–he… he needs you to–”, he paused, wheezing. “Guests are leaving.”

“Oh, right.” I nodded. “We have to say goodbye?”

He nodded. “And Princess Maryanne was looking for you, ma’am.” He added to Lourdes.

“Oh, thanks.” She said, before looking at us. “I’ll go see her. See you downstairs?”

“Sure.” She left. I looked at Auguste. “Okay, I’ll be right down, Auguste. Merci.”

He nodded again, breathless, looking at Harry.

“I’ll wait for you, ma’am.”

“No need.” I assured him. “I’ll meet you back at the reception hall.”

He nodded one more time, and bowed, before leaving.

We waited until the sound of his footsteps on the stairs had faded. Then I tentatively looked at Harry, already saddened at having to leave. He was looking around at the room.

“This is a cool place.” He said. 

“It is, I like it, too.”

We continued to just hang from the clock, seemingly trying to forget about the obligations knocking at our doors.

“We should–” I started, and he cleared his throat, nodding.

Carefully, we made our way down from the clock. Harry first, then me. He offered his hand to help me down from the railing, which I took. It didn’t stop me from slipping in my stockings again, though, and he had to step quickly closer to catch me in his arms just in time.

The problem was, now his arms were tight around me, our bodies glued together, my feet barely touching the floor. His warmth and mine were one, his breath and mine were one, and nothing else in the world existed.

“I miss you.” He said, suddenly. So suddenly I looked at him for a long time, speechless, convincing myself I hadn’t imagined it. But he was looking beyond me, awkwardly.

I didn’t know how to respond, at least not while his arms were keeping my standing, at least not while my insides felt like they were burning.

“I wanted to text you.” I confessed, softly. “But I guess I felt… guilty.”

I watched his eyes slowly reach mine again, hovering every inch of my face on their way. 

“I guess I still do.” I said.

He nodded, slowly. “So you… you regret it? The… kiss?”

“No.” I shook my head, quickly. “Not one bit.”

We smiled, and I felt as thought my skin was burning. 

“You?” I asked.

Slowly, he touched his forehead to mine. “Impossible.”

An infinity later, or maybe half a second, just as the distance between us was growing smaller, the door opened again.

We were so startled I must have jumped three steps back. I don’t know how much she saw, but something told me there was not a chance that my mother wouldn’t be absolutely livid, regardless.

“Marie-Margueritte.” She called, even-toned, calm to a chilling degree. “You have neglected your work long enough today.”

“I was just going downstairs.” I explained, avoiding her eyes, rushing towards my overcoat and shoes.

“You shouldn’t have left at all.” She added. “You have a duty.”

“It’s my fault, ma’am.” Harry told her. “I told the princesses how beautiful the Palace was and they wanted to show me more of it. They are wonderful hostesses.”

I sighed, knowing that wouldn’t help. I put on my coat quickly, and my shoes, and walked towards my mother, who was still seething looking at Harry, now putting on his blazer.

I could almost see it behind her eyes: the enraging need to tell Harry off for the way he spoke to her in Kensington Palace, and probably also for keeping me away from the reception. 

I held her hand. “Shall we go, Maman?”

She sighed. Wordlessly, she turned around and pulled me with her by the hand.

“Keep up, Your Royal Highness, you wouldn’t want to get lost.” She said, without looking back.

It was a long way back downstairs in total and utter silence. My mother didn’t let go of my hand until we were inside the reception hall, and she followed me until I was standing with my father in place to say our goodbye to our guests. 

I wanted to find a moment to talk to Harry again, before he had to leave. But there was no moment. 

Next thing I knew, he was standing in front of us, saying his formal goodbyes, gently kissing my knuckles, and walking away. 

— ---- —

It was hard to fall asleep that night, thinking about him, about his arms around me, about what might have happened if my mother hadn’t arrived until it was already sunny out. 

A few hours later, I stumbled down for breakfast only half-awake, glad that I had no work, hoping to get back into bed as fast as possible.

Unfortunately, while my mother and sister discussed her upcoming school commitments, I remembered the plan Harry and I had silently hatched the day before.

“Maman,” I started, “What is going on with Lourdes’ trainer? Is he still available?”

My parents exchanged a look. “Just for a few more weeks, unless your sister changes her mind.”

“I’m not.” Lourdes said.

My father folded his newspaper, and looked at her.

“You know, Mr. Federova has phoned frequently to inquire about you, Lourdes.” He said. “He thinks it would be a tremendous waste to let go of your years of hard work.”

“I said I don’t want to skate.” She repeated, more forcefully.

“Well, anyway.” I interrupted, cheery. “I was thinking, since he’s paid for the season and not working, that I might take some lessons.”

“Lessons?” My mother asked, confused.

“Ice skating lessons.”

Lourdes laughed. My father looked at me, slightly concerned. My mother merely nodded and said, “alright, I’ll call him and let him know to expect you.”

“Are we–?” my father started, clearing his throat, “are we sure that’s a good idea? Margueritte is… well–”

“Well?” I asked.

“A disaster.” Lourdes volunteered.

“Excuse me?”

“I just mean, you have many talents, dear,” my father intervened, “but coordination is, well, not one of the bigger ones.”

“Excus– I’m very! I–” I struggled, livid. “I’m very… sportsy!”

“Wow.” Lourdes sighed, sarcastic.

“Shut up. I’m good with– feet– sports! I can play! I play p–polo and stuff! Tennis!”

She shook her head. “Not to mention your talent for words.”

“Shut up! Mom?!”

Mom was grinning ever so slightly as she drank her tea.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt.” My father replied.

“I’ll be fine! You’ll see, I bet I’ll be great at it!”

“Maggie, you can’t be serious…”

I looked at my sister, confidently. “Why do you care? You’re not using him.”

“He’s a former Olympian! He can’t teach you the basics, it’s insulting!”

“I can ice skate, it won’t be the basics!”

“Please.”

“You wanna bet?”

She didn’t. But I kept up the charade, amping up my enthusism more than I actually felt it. Eventually, a few days later, when it was time to leave for my first lesson, Lourdes announced she was coming too.

“Ivan is a highly awarded, accomplished ice skating champion. If he’ll be subjected to teaching you how to stand on your own legs just because he’s been paid through the season, at least I should apologize in person.”

“…I can stand on my own legs.” I said, rolling my eyes.

Ivan Federova looked… scary. He wasn’t tall, or big in any way, it was like he had somehow maintained the same body he’d had when he won Olympic gold three times back to back in his late teenage years. Now he was in his fifties and didn’t seem to be capable of smiling… or personal contact. He’d made little effort to learn either French or English, but it wasn’t usually a problem, as he didn’t talk much.

Lourdes was mostly quiet on the way to the rink. Over the years, my family had signed rental deals with three ice rinks around Savoy. One was close to Lourdes’ school, where she practiced every day after classes under the supervision of her security and trainer. The other was closer to Haydell Castle. As Corsilla was a small town, the nearest rink was a half an hour drive away, in Grauville.  The last one, where we were going today, was close to Callois Palace, where my parents resided full time, for practice during weekends or school holidays. Ivan’s contract stipulated he practiced with Lourdes in whatever rink was easier for her depending on the time of the year.

Upon running into Ivan in the empty rink, Lourdes launched into an apology and explanation of her decision to quit, very professional in all of her thirteen years-old. Ivan cut her off after around five minutes of this, looking at me instead and saying, in a gruff, heavily Russian-accented voice, “I train you now?”

“Yes.” I said, stepping forward, schooling my features into enthusiasm instead of fear, “I’m very much looking forward to it. I may not have much experience, but what I lack in-”

“Stretch.”

“What?”

“Stretch!” he gestures to my whole body.

“Go stretch.” Lourdes explained, looking appalled that I had to ask. “Your legs specially.”

I ran to the sidelines of the ice, and, unsure of where to begin, started doing the leg stretches I usually did at the gym.

Ivan had me put on my old, barely ever used pair of skates, said something in a mixture of Russian and French, of which I understood only a part about having to break them in, and then told me to do laps around the rink so he could see ‘my form’, which was, of course, a disgrace. He sighed heavily after I finished a slow, wombly lap, and stepped into the ice himself to teach me how to skate more confidently.

Lourdes, who out of principle hadn’t brought her skates, watched from the bleachers. When she first attempted to yell out advice, Ivan shouted, “No help from public, merci. This is private”, and she sunk in her seat for the following half an hour.

Around that time was when I realized I would soon be sporting fresh dark purple bruises all over my body. Ivan discovered that what he had meant to teach me would take longer than he had intended. First it was skating without slouching, then it was breaking, then he had to push me very hard to make turns without wanting to scream. 

When Ivan declared the lesson over, I sighed in relief and sat on the floor, exhausted. He quickly reminded me to go home and be back the following day. 

“Tomorrow?!” I asked, appalled.

Lourdes kept coming with me for my ‘lessons’ even though she looked as though she was being forced to go; the first time she brought her skates and got into the ice with me, Ivan yelled at her that this was a private lesson. She sat in the bleacher fuming, arms crossed on her chest.

A week later, I was not able to move, but my parents kept saying they were proud I wasn’t giving up. Lourdes came back the following lesson and barged into the rink on her skates; before Ivan said anything, she told him “our family is paying for an empty rink, might as well have both of us use it, get our money’s worth”, then she just skated to the other side of the ice and pretended she wasn’t watching us. It was kind of amusing.

The real deal started when Ivan tried to teach me how to spin. The first one was reasonably easy, standing in place, just using my hands and knees to create momentum and letting the ice do the rest. The danger came with a sit spin. It looked so seamless when he or Lourdes did it, but it involved a lot more steps than I would have imagined. I had to skate confidently in one leg, raise the other backwards and bring it forward as I used my arms to spin in place. Ivan’s accent got worse when he was frustrated, and I hated being so clearly bad at something, especially in front of my obviously talented little sister, so there were a lot of high tempers in the ice.

I wanted to text Harry every day, tell him every little bit of all of this, but the more I stared into his number, the more terrified I felt. I knew if I started there would be no going back. If I sent one message, I wouldn’t be able to stop. And if there was anything V. E. Day had proved, it was that there was just too much between us.

At one point, when Ivan was getting louder and I was trying to convince myself not to leave, Lourdes skated towards us - breaching the invisible line he had drawn between us - and stopped between me and him. “Maggie,” she started, and when her trainer tried to yell she just waved an impatient hand at him, focusing on me, “you’re too afraid to fall when you lunge.”

I sighed. “Yeah, my bad, I should just ignore the prospect of feeling pain.”

She brushed off my sarcasm with remarkable ease, “Get in position.” I did as she said, and she approached, slapping my buttcheek.

“Hey!”

“See this? You might not have a lot of it, but it’s something! It’s fat, which means your blow will be cushioned. And this arm right here will stop the fall as soon as it comes–”

“Is there a way where I avoid falling?”

“No.” She and Ivan replied, together.

“If you fear fall, you can’t skate.” He told me.

“Go again.” Lourdes said, skating backwards.

I sighed and tried again, giving it an honest effort, but falling on my ass regardless.

“You’re too slow when you spin, so you don’t have enough momentum to stay on your feet.”

“God, if it’s so easy why don’t you do it?!”, I stupidly said, exasperated.

She nailed it, of course. Took a graceful, long stride forward, then turned backwards as if it was nothing, then flipped her weight from her right leg to the left in a step forward, using the right leg to get momentum into a spin. She spun wildly on herself atop her left skate as she crouched down on her left knee, right leg stretched forward with her arms above it reaching for her foot. Then, just as she had started to slow down she stood up and her right leg stretched backwards; she grabbed hold of the blade in the skate and pulled it upwards behind her back, above her head, the move giving her more momentum so the spin caught speed again. It felt as if several minutes passed, but I couldn’t take my eyes from her. Eventually, she let go of her leg, which swiftly crossed in front of the left. She leapt into her right foot now, allowing her left leg to bend backwards slightly, starting to spin again for another several laps with her hands up above her head, torso laid backways on her waist. When she started to slow, she straightened up, opened her arms, and stepped out of her spin gracefully backwards, breaking perfectly in front of us.

She had a victorious, emotional smile on her lips, and a glint to her eyes I had never seen before.

We were silent for a couple of seconds as she breathed heavily; Then, Ivan said, “Show her your triple lutz.”

She looked at him, thoughtfully, for a long time. I thought she was going to ask why, and was ready to answer ‘inspiration!’, but she didn’t. She drew in a long breath, and stepped forward.

I skated to Ivan slowly while she took up speed and turned to skate backwards, one leg behind her. She leaned forward slightly and next thing I knew she was twisting in the air. She landed smiling, on her left leg, right one gracefully up behind her back. She skated to us slowly, panting slightly.

“Sloppy.” Ivan told her. I gave him a shocked look he ignored.

“Well, I haven’t skated in months, ever since–”

“Excuses don’t make podium.”

She sighed. “Fine.”

She skated away again and repeated the jump. I applauded, mumbling to Ivan without moving my lips, “Don’t antagonize her.”

“I teach.” He replied, unaffected.

She broke in front of us forcefully, still smiling. Still breathless, but looking more alive than I’d ever seen her.

“That was awesome!” I said.

“You under rotate. You lose points.”

She looked at the ice beneath her feet, sighing, hands to her waist. Silently, she skated off again.

I looked at Ivan. “Seriously, what’s the plan?”

“Remind her what she loves.”

“…being insulted by you?”

He grinned, still watching her.

Her third jump was… well, to me it was exactly the same as the other two. And as Ivan’s expression didn’t change, I had to wait until she skated back to us.

“Flat edge. Lose points.” Ivan said before she even reached us.

Instead of breaking, she took speed again and took off for another try. Except this time she did her first jump, landed, and immediately jumped up again in another twist in the air.

“Triple lutz, triple toe.” Ivan nodded. When she approached us again, she was out of air; she doubled down on herself, hands to her knees, panting. “Luchshe.” When I seemed confused, he corrected, in French. “Mieux.” Better.

“It was amazing!” I exclaimed.

“Axel.” Ivan told Lourdes.

She straightened up, looked at him, no longer smiling. She fixed her ponytail and skated off again.

This time when she skated backwards on her right foot, she didn’t lean forward, and instead looked backwards at the last minute to make a fast switch to her left skate to jump forward quickly, arms crossed to her chest. Her hair spun wildly in the air with her, but when she landed she fell on her side.

I startled, gasping, and Ivan held my arm to keep me from going to her.

“No training.” He yelled out. “That happens.”

She got to her feet, shook off the ice in her pants, and tried again, taking up speed, skating past us without giving us even a glance. She didn’t fall this time. I looked at Ivan.

“Bad entry. Lose points.”

Lourdes had clearly heard him, she didn’t even bother coming to us, instead just took up speed and tried again. She fell.

“You lean your back to your side.” Ivan shouted after her. “Your back needs to be over your feet.”

She tried again. She stumbled on her feet in the landing, but didn’t fall. I thought it was a victory.

“Elbows in.” Ivan shouted. “The, uh– poids stay center! The… weigh.” He translated. “The weight stays center, not back.”

She tried again. 

Ivan crossed his arms on his chest. “Good.” He said, nodding. “Good.”

I smiled, looking at her, but she didn’t skate to us. “He said it was good!” I shouted.

But she kept going. She jumped again. And then again. She fell back. She jumped again. Ivan sighed. “Enough now.”

She jumped. She fell. She was panting as she skated to get more speed to go again. Ivan shook his head. “No good.” “What?!” I asked.

“That’s punishment. Not training.”

“Lourdes!” I yelled. “That’s enough!”

She jumped again. Ivan sighed.

She did it twice more before I stepped into her path when she was skating past us to get more speed. She almost lost her balance, but managed to skate past me. I followed. She jumped again, and fell. I reached her after she’d gotten up, but was still slow enough I could wrap my arms around her to stop her in place.

“Maggie!” She shouted. “Stop!”

“It’s enough!” I shouted back, feeling a confusing knot on my throat. “That’s good, it’s beautiful. Stop.”

I felt her gloved hands on my arms, trying to pull them off her.

“This is none of your business, just–”

“You’re hurting yourself! You’re out of breath! Stop it!”

“No!”

She doubled down, trying to get out of my reach. We fell to the ground, instead, but I kept my arms firmly in place.

“This is not about you!” She shouted, reaching back to try and push me away.

“I know!” I shouted back, feeling my eyes water. “I know!”

We struggled. I wondered where Ivan was that he hadn’t come to help me yet. We must have looked ridiculous, and that thought didn’t stop the tears.

“Why are you doing this to yourself?! You love this, you’re great at it, you know how to do it, so why are you doing this?!”

I heard a small gasp of air and stopped moving. She let her head fall to rest on the ice, one hand over her eyes. We were on our sides; I leaned back just slightly so she could lay on her back, allowing me to look at her, finding her lips trembling, nose red.

“Lourdes-” I whispered.

“He’s gone.” She cried. “He won’t be there. He’ll never be there.”

It was enough to make me cry, too. But I tried to steady my voice when I asked, softly, “be where, Lou?”

I didn’t need to know who, of course. Her tears fell heavily down her face to her hair.

“I always thought-” she hiccuped, “I always pictured it. Competing. Winning. I always thought– Whenever I dreamed about the– The Olympics. I had it all planned–”

“And you can go!” I told her, teary.

She shook her head. “I was going to do it, and I was going to finish and in the end when– when people clap and I bow, I was going to do the bows and then I was going to find you guys in your seats.” She took her hands off her eyes, and stared at the ceiling. “Mom, dad, you and Lou… I was going to skate to where you were, and do another bow just for you.”

I felt my chest tighten painfully. She brought her hands to her lips and blew a kiss to the ceiling.

“I was going to do this and wave and skate off… and– and I wouldn’t even be too worried waiting for my notes, because you’d be there.”

I felt my own tears fall to the ice, and let my head rest on the floor, too.

“You’d have gone, right? All of you. If it was the Olympics, I mean.”

“Of course.” I told her. “Of course we would.”

She looked at me. “And now he won’t be there.”

“Oh, sweetie.” I leaned in, touching my head to her shoulder. “He… He’d be so upset to hear this.”

She sat up. “Don’t say that.”

“It’s true.” I replied, looking at the ceiling. “’He won’t be there’? Well, no, Lourdes, he won’t be anywhere. He won’t… he won’t see my wedding. My kids will never know him. So, what should I do? Should I never get married? Never have kids?”

“That’s not what I’m talking about!” She complained. “Every time I get in the ice, every time I look at my skates, that’s all I can think about! That he won’t see the next jump I learn, that he won’t help me pick a dress or a song. That he won’t be there when I win–”

“Yeah, Lourdes, you don’t think I know what that is?!” I sat up, grabbing hold of her elbow so she’d look at me. “My entire existence now is a reminder that he’s gone! Every time someone calls me ‘Crown Princess’, every time I think about my future, it just means that he’s gone! Should I give that up, too?! Hope you’re ready to be Queen, then!”

She shook her head, but her lips were trembling again. I reached out with my hand, caressing her back. When she started sobbing, I pulled her close, and she let me, leaning into my arms tightly wrapped around her.

I let her cry, for as long as she needed. When her sobs spaced out, I started clearing the ice off her clothes gently.

“Everything reminding us of him is just… what grief is.” I told her. “It sucks. It’s… it’s all this love that was his, that we still feel, but have no one to give it to, anymore.” I brushed the hair off her face with my hands. “But we don’t stop. We can’t. He’d be so pissed if we did. We just… we keep going. And we remember him. I teach my kids about the uncle they’ll never know. You get to that podium and think of him… and wherever he is, he’ll be proud. That’s what we do.”

I kissed the back of her head, and she sat up, cleaning her face with her hands.

“But for that to happen, you can’t quit.”

She stared at her hands for a while, calming her breath. Then, she nodded.

“Okay.”

--- ---- ---

[A/N: Happy holidays!!!!!! Hi. How are you? How’s your end of year been? I am home, christmas was chill. Ate a lot. Back to work now. Trying to pull a hamilton and write every night like i’m running out of time. Did anyone watch Bridgerton? Because I am OBSESSED. Anyway. I KNOW. Another moment interrupted. Thsoe can only happen a few times guys, I promise we’re nearly there haha THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING! I am so blessed to have you and so grateful to you for being here! I’d love to know your thoughts. Anything you’d like to see more of? Other than H and MM, of course! lol Savoy or MM’s family things? Work? Royal events? Friends? Let me know =)  Also, I’m still working on fixing a masterlist of chapters, so look out for that!

We’re nearing phase 2 of the story and I am excited to share with you! THANK YOU FOR READING! And.......HAPPY NEW YEAR!]

[billehrman]

Growth versus Value

Growth Versus Value

The financial markets are fighting a tug of war between an accelerating economy, a steepening yield curve, and investing in growth vs. value stocks. Growth stocks are considered longer term duration assets while value stocks, in this instance, are companies tied to the economic recovery with significant operating leverage in the expansion. A steepening yield curve, which we continue to forecast, will penalize all multiples, but growth stocks will be hit harder as their multiples compress more as duration shortens. Value stocks will benefit from a surge in profits more than offsetting any multiple decline as the recovery gains steam.

We expect first quarter earnings reports to be very telling and confusing as businesses were hurt by weather and shortages, especially semi-conductors, which penalized auto sales and other industries. Shortages are likely to persist for several quarters so the key will be watching orders and backlogs as true indicators of a company’s strength and potential earnings power. We would use any confusing first quarter results to add to positions to companies leveraged to the economy as we expect the expansion to last well into 2023. That expansion would be supported by expansive monetary and fiscal policy, as well as trillions of excess liquidity in the system.  Naturally, getting our arms around the virus globally, which we still see globally by the end of this year, is key when evaluating the sustainability of the expansion. Don’t forget when investing that we are just in the very early innings of a surge in global economic activity, steepening yield curves. and much higher corporate earnings/cash flow so invest accordingly! We are concentrating in areas with both cyclical and secular winds to their backs.

We continue to focus on the virus, monetary and fiscal policy, and current economic data points to see if the recovery is unfolding as predicted and has legs.

News on the virus domestically continues to brighten by the week while news abroad continues to be disappointing. It is interesting that countries with the highest incomes are vaccinating 25 times faster than those with the lowest incomes. As of Thursday, 40% of COVID vaccinations administered globally have gone to people in 27 wealthy nations that represent 11% of the global population. The U.S, for example, has 24% of the world’s vaccinations but just 4.3% of the population. It is clear that all Americans could easily be vaccinated by the summer and all in the world before late fall such that the recovery will be sustainable into 2022 and beyond.

We continue to hear from the heads of all monetary authorities that they will maintain overly accommodative stances well into the recovery and will not even consider raising rates until the end of 2023 at the earliest, even if inflation runs hot, as expected, for a few months. Fed Chairman Powell spoke Thursday at the Spring meeting of the IMF and reaffirmed his view that it will take years to bring back employment levels to pre-pandemic levels and that the recovery remains uneven and incomplete. Fed minutes from the last meetings on March 16 -17th pointed to a brighter outlook for the economy while agreeing to provide continued support through ultralow interest rates and large monthly bond purchases. The Fed is so focused on unemployment repeating again, that rates will not be hiked until the labor markets reach maximum employment (another 10 million jobs) and inflation sustains at or above 2%. Powell said that “changes in the path of policy will be based primarily on observed outcomes rather than forecasts.” Isn’t it time that we believe the Fed, BOJ, ECB and Bank of England that they will let economies run hot, even overheat, before adjusting policy? We do! Doesn’t that favor value stocks with cyclical/secular strengths over growth stocks with lots of potential multiple compression?

The debate about Biden’s proposed “American Jobs Plan” and human infrastructure plan began in earnest last week focusing on defining infrastructure and how best to pay for it while remaining globally competitive. We believe that the plan will be divided in two parts. First it will focus on a $1.5+ trillion infrastructure bill for roads, bridges, ports, transportation, broadband and some green spending and another, over $1 trillion, dealing with human infrastructure like free community college, caregiving, long-term care and prescription drug overhaul. The Democrats do not want to go to a budget reconciliation process as many “social” parts of both bills won’t make it and several Democrats do not support much of the tax plan to pay for them. Even Biden acknowledged last week that he is willing to negotiate many aspects of the tax bill as long as there is enough money there to fund both plans.

Interestingly, Janet Yellen raised the issue last week for a global tax rate to “make sure the global economy thrives based on a level playing field…that spurs innovation, growth and prosperity.” The bottom line is that we still see the corporate tax rate increasing but only to around 25% with incentives for hiring, research and domestic capital investment. Individual taxes will go up, too, but we believe that the definition of wealthy may increase from $400,000 to a number closer to $500,000. Closing loopholes, broaden the tax base, user fees, and increasing collections will be major components of both tax bills. While we expect the large infrastructure bills to be passed this year, we do not see it benefitting the economy until 2022 and it will be spent over 10 years with added tax revenues collected cover 15 years.

Let’s take a look of some of the most recent data points that confirm that the economic recovery here and even abroad has begun: consumer credit rose a staggering $27.7 billion in February, mostly non revolving credit; U.S. jobless claims increased to 744,000 which shows that the labor market has a long way to go; Services PMI increased to 63.7; Business Activity Index at 69.4; Employment Index at 57.2; Supplier Deliveries at 61.0; and the PPI Price Index for final demand increased 1% in March with final demand prices up 0.5%.

The IMF increased its global forecast last week saying that “a way out of the crisis is increasingly visible.” The world economy is now projected to increase 6% in 2021 vs a forecast of 5.5% back in January and 4.4% in 2022 vs a forecast of 4.2% in January. Specifically, growth in 2021 is forecasted at 6.4% for the U.S., 4.4% for the Eurozone, 3.3% for Japan, 8.4% for China and 12.5% for India. Global trade volumes are forecasted to increase 8.4% which will help lift all boats. By the way, China’s auto sales are now above pre-pandemic levels exceeding 5 million in the first quarter.

Investment Conclusions

We are in the early innings of a global economic recovery that will extend well into 2023 supported by easy monetary and fiscal policies plus trillions of excess liquidities already in the system. We applaud Janet Yellen’s efforts to have a universal tax code but think chances of one being agreed to, let alone adhered to, are very low, but do indicate her desire that the U.S. have a competitive tax rate, which argues against the proposed 28% rate.    

While markets have primarily been driven by excess liquidity over the last year, it will, if it has not already, shifted to one driven by higher earnings as the global economy recovers. Herein lies the debate between growth and value stocks. We shifted our portfolios months ago to companies leveraged to the economy expecting much higher earnings than consensus over the next few years driven by higher volume, improved pricing and record operating margins. Areas of concentration include global capital goods/industrials/machinery companies; industrial/ag commodities; financials, transportation, special situations and technology at a price. Yes, we continue to own some technology as every company in the world to remain competitive and improve operating efficiencies must step up its tech spending. We are focused on areas with the wind towards our backs including infrastructure, 5/6G, broadband, EV, green technology, and building back better in America. We do not own bonds nor any highfliers where we see significant multiple compression.

Our investment webinar will be held on Monday April 12th at 8:30 am EST. You can join the webinar by entering https://zoom.us/j/9179217852 in your browser or calling +646 558 8656 and entering the password 9179217852.

Remember to review all the facts; pause, reflect and consider mindset shifts; look at your asset allocation with risk controls; listen to as many earnings reports as possible; do independent research and …

Invest Accordingly!

Bill Ehrman

Paix et Prosperite LLC

Paixetprosperite1@gmail.com

917-951-4139