#this is kind of clunky but that's why its a work in progress and not a published finished work

[mitskijamie]

👀👀👀

“You’ve got a kitty!” Jamie exclaims, a stupid, fuck-drunk grin practically splitting his face in two. “What’s his name?”

The scraggly old bastard hops into Roy’s lap and knocks its head against his knuckles.

Roy scratches the space between its scraggly old ears, and it settles into a ball atop his lap, purring a scraggly old mucousy purr.

“Dunno,” he answers. “‘S not mine. Found it fucking about in my back garden a couple weeks ago. Just been feeding it, ‘cause it's got no tags.”

Jamie scoffs.

“Then why’s he in your house and not in the garden?”

His tone is accusatory, like having a cat is a goddamn crime, and he's trying to back Roy into a corner and weasel a confession out of him.

Roy shrugs.

“I didn't bring it in. Just came in the cat door.”

It's the wrong thing to say, and he realizes his mistake as soon as the words have left his mouth. There's hardly damning evidence of cat ownership than installing a fucking cat door; if he wasn't caught before, he certainly is now.

Jamie's stupid eyebrows shoot up.

“And why do you got a cat door for a cat that ain't yours?”

Roy picks up the pillow behind him (gently, so as not to disturb the cat) and chucks it at Jamie's face.

“Fuck you! Why don't you name it, then, since you’re so fucking invested?”

“Chester,” Jamie answers immediately. “Always wanted a cat named Chester. Like the Chestercat from Alice in Wonderland.”

“Chestercat? It's called the Cheshire Cat.”

Jamie picks up the pillow Roy had thrown at him a moment ago and uses it to whack him upside the head.

“Fuck off. Chester. Final answer.”

[mdhwrites]

Do you think Boscha was treated unfairly in the context of the show? I know you've said before what you would have wanted her characterization to be, but what do you think of her character as we have it in TOH - and do you think fan and narrative treatment lines up with this?

I'm going to ignore the fan element. Fandom is going to fandom after all. However, I can easily say where her narrative treatment went wrong in the show!

She should not have been in S3.

This is always a fun topic to me essentially because I am pro-Boscha. You ask me what her character is, the potential of it, etc. like that and I can give you reams of thoughts. However, I also said, before S2 came out and I was working on a fanfic where Boscha was quickly becoming the main character, that I didn't think Boscha should show up again. The reason is pretty simple too. TOH already had a lot of threads to pull and Boscha's narrative use was over. Honestly, Hexside was essentially was used up by then.

Boscha is a minor supporting character to the main character's love interest. Not a major supporting character, a minor one. Amity's family is MUCH more important to her character than her one bitchy friend. The only use Boscha had narratively was to both contrast how Amity was changing and to also allow Amity an antagonist to overcome as she made her way to being on the side of good. Her being a one note bully is perfect for that and exactly how she should have been written. Winging it Like Witches capitalizes on this and fulfills both of her purposes and Amity cuts Boscha out of her life so... Why are we still seeing her? She is no longer even a supporting cast member to the love interest, she is just a floating character in the background.

And in S2, we get a fine answer for that. She's essentially one of the townsfolk of Wartwood in Amphibia. Someone who can show up for a quick gag but doesn't take up too much time. We're not trying to progress her character, we're just taking advantage of the fact that she's not gone. She's a gag but it's genuinely rooted in her character unlike the one joke that King or Hooty have that we're just supposed to mock. This worked. Period.

Then S3 tries to give her an arc. Why? Well... Because it doesn't want to be a kid's show. Kid's shows after all, like Amphibia, have characters who don't have some deep backstory or brooding complexity, they're just... Fun. They're nice. They aren't complicated. Boscha, WAY too late, was made to be complicated during a shortened season so the show could claim it had one more redemption? So it could claim its shallow bully character wasn't shallow? And she takes up a good amount of time in this episode for this when you have THREE SPECIALS. The stress of the world ending isn't enough to cause Willow to lose control, she needs one more push from Boscha. We finally have to acknowledge that what Amity did was a complete dick move to her best friend and then not actually acknowledge it because Amity gets to just be morally superior instead of a decent human being to this girl having a mental breakdown. It's awkward, clunky and does NO favors to Boscha besides just kind of making her look pathetic, which is a pretty common trick in TOH for trying to redeem someone. Boscha isn't so bad because she's actually a loser and not as bad as someone else in her nearby vicinity.

Why? Why do this? Why do this TWO SEASONS after Boscha was no longer narratively useful? It is just pointless to your overall story so it should have been cut. THAT is Boscha's biggest problem in the show and if anyone told me they couldn't forgive her for adding filler to S3, I couldn't tell them they're wrong.

I love Boscha. That means I know when to let her go, something the show should have learned if they actually cared about her. See you next tale.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[ratlesshonret]

Things I LOVED About Pocket Mirror ~ GoldenerTraum & Little Goody Two Shoes (as a long-time series fan)

AKA, the long-awaited positivity post.

This is a direct follow-up to my posts "The (few) Things I Didn't Like About Pocket Mirror ~ GoldenerTraum" and "My (few) Issues With Little Goody Two Shoes"

Those posts trended very negative because, well, lists of complaints are inherently negative. However, despite my (honestly, kinda nitpicky) complaints, I do want to show that I still adore these games. And thus, I will be giving my list of things I think GoldenerTraum and LGTS did right.

Well, to be fair, these games did most things right. But I'll pick the ones I think stand out the most.

This post contains spoilers, as always. Rant below the cut.

Part 1 - GoldenerTraum

-The new lore introduced in this game, alongside the entirely new ending, are just great. Really solid ways to expand the section of canon that Pocket Mirror focuses on without changing the game very much.

-I love the convenience factor of this game versus the original. Less clunky required menu openings, less instances of "what do I need to examine to progress," and just generally smoother gameplay.

-I can't do this without mentioning the graphics. Complete and utter upgrade in every way. The original always looked great, but now looking back on it, its definitely not as polished as the modern style.

-(I know this is a positivity post, but I do wanna say I prefer the original Lisette sprite. I love the new one as well, but I think the new "heavy frills and detailed wrinkles" artstyle, while it generally works for the period and wealth the game is set around, doesn't fit Lisette.)

-Back to positivity now, the higher resolution theaters are really good. I originally wished they'd be changed/reanimated, but that was a mistake on my end. After all, why mess with perfection?

-GoldenerTraum and the accompanying anime opening are amazing. Full stop. Best intro to maybe any game ever. Everblooming Wild Rose Coronation is also great. (Though if I were to be fully honest, I kinda wish it only played after the Dawn ending instead of every ending. But that's a nitpick.)

-The removal of the bloat in the prologue is very much appreciated. On replays, the dance hall area feels very drawn out and unimportant, and generally a slog to go through. While I still don't like replaying this section, it is MUCH more bearable with the excess meat chopped off. It always felt like filler, anyway.

-The CGs that were updated look much nicer. No elaboration on this one, that's where my thought ends.

-Actually, yes elaboration. This is about the CG of Lisette coming out of the mirror before her first chase. The redraw is so pretty. I love Lisette <3.

-Improved visibility in many dark areas makes me a very happy person. While it maybe does remove some of the tension and atmosphere, it makes the game more accessible for new players who now won't need to feel around in the dark for ten minutes to find the candle in the Sugary Supper area, or whatever.

-Henri sprite.

-Finally, and I want to loop back to the character sprites, I love how they give an option to return to the original sprites. I love when remakes/remasters have some kind of "nostalgia mode" so that the original versions of things aren't lost.

Part 2 - Little Goody Two Shoes

-Music is great. I still prefer Pocket Mirror's OST, but holy hell some of the tracks in this game get lodged in my brain sometimes.

-Art is fantastic. I love the CGs, so many of them are so detailed and pretty. I might set some of them as my computer backgrounds, that's how good they are.

-Speaking of, the sprites are really good. I love some of Elise and Rozenmarine's sprites, especially.

-Strange Boy finally getting a name is nice. Now I don't need to call him Strange Boy. (I will still call him Strange Boy.)

-godiknowthisissupposedtobeapositivitypostbutholyshitiwanttopuntthatchildmuffyintothegoddamnsunsobaditsunreal

-In general the environments are beautiful. One of the few ways this game is a straight step-up from Pocket Mirror. The tiny waterfall in the river looks so pretty, especially during the day. And that's just one example of an environmental piece that really stood out.

-I want to praise Thursday Witching Hour, or as I called it in my last post, "the only one that's better than bearable." It is a genuinely tense section, and scarier than anything in Pocket Mirror. It was the only thing in either game to really make me aware that this is a horror series.

-I do generally like the mechanics of hunger/money management, and the minigames are fun (except Kiss the Rat.) The intense effort that must've been put into the art and design of these short games you only play to make money was not lost on me.

-The characters are charming (exceptmuffy), about on par with Pocket Mirror's believe it or not. Rozenmarine is the only one I can speak heavily on, since her endings are the only routes I've done, but she's so cute and I love her. Freya also seems very great, which is why I have her route lined up to do next. Elise herself is also much different from how I assumed, but I love her as a protagonist.

-The sheer amount of lore this game introduces, from how Elise's deal with Strange Boy went down, to how the Pocket Mirror made it into Goldia's hands in the first place, is downright amazing for a lore nerd like myself.

-While this game didn't make me as emotional as Pocket Mirror does at any point (both of Lisette's endings still make me sob like a baby,) I did feel pretty empty inside after sacrificing Rozenmarine during the "canon" ending. And games that put me into a literal depressive episode after finishing are the ones I remember the most and love the most.

-The sheer amount of endings does give this game good replay value. Of course, that is undercut by... literally the dozen things I mentioned in my last post, but it does give me reason to stick it out.

-The fact that even the background characters have consistent personalities is nice. I love when games pay that close attention to detail. Though I will say that most of the ones without large-scale speaking sprites did kinda blend together into one person in my head, and in some cases they may as well have been one person. But on my next playthrough, I'll definitely take the time to pay attention to who says what lines, rather than just skimming the text itself.

-The dates are really cute, especially the associated scenes. You do not know the scream I let out when Rozenmarine finally dropped the L-bomb on Elise. That scene was adorable, despite being undercut by my constant (and later proven correct) dread of her dying painfully soon.

-Seriously, just the fact that you are playing as a lesbian is great. I can't think of many games, other than ones explicitly marketed as "yuri romance" or "lesbian dating sim" that have this kind of casual representation. It warms my heart a lot to see it not fall to the pitfalls of "has to be a visual novel or dating sim" or "only hinted-at representation."

-My final compliment for now, I adore Rozenmarine in general. I'm a very character-focused person, and I now have a new character to rotate and hyper-fixate on in my mind.

Part 3 - Outro

I love these games. A lot. I don't want to ever give the impression of "GoldenerTraum is a bad remake" or "LGTS isn't a good sequel" because those things aren't true. Despite my complaints, my opinions on these games are 90% positive.

All of this to say... I'm not falling out of love with this series. While the original Pocket Mirror holds a special place in my heart as "maybe the best thing Astral Shift has ever made," I still love their newest projects all the same. And nostalgia plays a big part in that place it has in my heart.

I love you, Pocket Mirror. And I love you, Little Goody Two Shoes.

[centrally-unplanned]

undefined

(CW: suicide)

The ending of the PS1 Serial Experiments Lain game is something that sat with me for a while in how it relates to the TV show ending. In the game - oh btw Lain got a PS1 alt-history visual novel retelling in 1998, produced coterminously with the anime, you can play it here - Lain commits suicide in order to ‘ascend’ into The Wired, as opposed to kinda-maybe-never really existing to begin with as she does in the anime. The story leading up to this ending is completely different, primarily involving Lain in therapy, but the themes are all there in both at their core, so these endings do speak to the same concepts.

I think I bounced off it a bit at first because it does not stand out in its execution. The PS1 game is not well-made, with a god-awful interface and clunky progression, and a tiny budget that can barely squeak out a few animations to sell its key moments. Some of them work but their quality is a few tiers below anything the anime had. It has its good parts as a game, don’t get me wrong, just that on selling individual ‘moments’ its not gonna shine.

Also Lain kills herself with a gun?

Its...jarring, its not the kind of thing Lain seems like she would do. Its so analog and brute-force, connecting to an entire world of violence and power that Lain never had anything to do with. I can see why its done this way - as I have mentioned before, Lain is ‘secretly’ a member of the horror genre and is pulling from a lot of that genre’s tropes. The visual novel has a lot more elements of gore and body horror, leaning into that identity harder, so its fits better here. Additionally in Japan guns are a lot more rare as a thing a child would have, they are Advanced Technology out of reach, a bit more similar to a computer (in 1998) than in the west. Hell, Lain came out before the Columbine High School Shooting happened (1999!), kids-with-a-gun just had a different meaning *everywhere*. It is still offputting though, a method chosen for omg-shock that drops your jaw when you are 14 but falls flat as an adult.

Once the execution wore off though its implications for the narrative really started to claw at me. The “Lain of the Wired” concept is bound up in the common cybernetic idea of the ‘upload’, porting yourself over to live on the internet. The anime has that in spades of course, Lain eventually lives only as a ghost in the machine; but its in the end a happy ending, one she chooses to protect her friend and where she gets to look out over them as essentially a caring spirit as they live their lives. It buys into, fundamentally, the possibility of the upload to preserve the self.

The PS1 game sets up a similar premise through its buildup - Lain grows digitally powerful but emotionally distant from everyone in her own life, each of her relationships falls apart one by one, her attempts to compensate for that within reality fail, and so she rejects reality. She chooses to ‘upload’, but through doing so she turns away from the idea of preserving the ‘human’ self at all, as becomes apparent as she builds up to her suicide via her conversations with her “Lain of the Wired” alter-ego:

This is a far harsher view on that process - “the rest is just data” hot damn. Throughout the game you see this ‘data’; the game is structured as you, the player, diving into a computer system pulling up archived logs, often out-of-order, to tease out her story.

In between the logs you find these little audio-visual clips of fragmentary & disconnected sentences with no connection to the ‘story’. She likes cake, she is getting bored of her ‘outfit’, she shares philosophical musings on various topics.

And some, particularly the later ones, are stained with a desperation to connect with others. “Do you want to find me?” “Only play with me” “Stay with me”,

But this is *all* Lain is. There is that “Lain UI”, but its mechanical, it never engages or responds, an abandoned prototype. Everything else you read is a log of past Lain, things that happened before, when she was alive. In those logs she even explicitly rejects the idea of making a “backup” of herself, referring to her past life as “useless”. The fragmentary data files you find are what is left. The way they combines facts, trivialities, and desires gives them a semblance of life, but only a semblance, just the embers of a ghost still clinging to the machine. That is what the vaunted “Lain of the Wired” amounted to.

Which is way more accurate to what we are all going to be, on this internet on our earth. “Uploading” isn’t real, concepts like these are used in stories as literary devices to analogize to the audience, and to that audience “living on the internet” looks exactly like the fragments Lain left behind. Its social media posts, art, websites, publications, a web of data. Yet its a web that all ties back to the living person. Of course “your posts don’t have consciousness”, that is trivial to say, but it goes beyond that, to how the things on here lose their relevance so quickly once separated from the ‘consciousness’ that made them and drives them. “Your posts don’t have meaning absent the creator behind them” is perhaps a bit bolder statement, and while not logically true it is emotionally true, true in important ways, for the audience to see in Lain’s ending a version of their own end. That hits.

This ending is I believe a case of medium-is-the-message, anime just aren’t in the business of having finales with that level of bleak nihilism. But an experimental horror game aimed at the niche obsessive fans, the ‘franchise’ isn’t riding on that, it can afford to roll the dice. Which is why, despite all its technical flubs, its the ending I still get sparked into thinking about in odd moments months after playing - like today it seems, if I am writing this. 

Throwing a bit more kindling onto the embers I guess.

[solidandsound]

Annual~ video~ game~ retrospective~~~

My goal for this year was to beat every game in my backlog from the year 2004, having already cleared out everything prior to that. I did succeed at this goal as it was set... but since then I have also added a bunch more games to my backlog, thanks to my partner and I buying up a bunch of stuff before the Wii U virtual console store closed. As a result, I'm setting the same goal again: to beat everything in my backlog from 2004 or earlier. As a subgoal, I'll try and get a head start on 2005 as well, as that year is packed for me!

In terms of numbers, I only beat 26 games this year. That's a fair bit fewer than last year's 33. I blame some of the meaty titles I tackled this year, as well as the stuff I played a lot of but can't say I'm done with. If I want to boost that number, I may decide to play more tiny indie games next year.

I went on a bit of a Fire Emblem kick this year. After doing my second playthrough of Three Houses, I still wanted more, so I tried Shadow Dragon for the first time. I'd always dismissed the game for its art style and knowing that it has a more bare bones story than other games in the series. Both of those things are true, but it ended up being such a blast to play regardless, and so interesting to see where the famous Fire Emblem permadeath mechanic began. I then went on to (re)play Fire Emblem (GBA) and Sacred Stones, and thought a lot about the pros and cons of FE's approach to permadeath and how it's changed as the series progressed, and ended up taking some notes on how I would approach it in a game of my own. And I closed off the year with a replay of Fire Emblem Echoes to top it all off!

I also went on a bit of a Zelda kick to prepare for Tears of the Kingdom. Unlike a lot of folks my age, I only got into Zelda as an adult, and there was still a lot of the series I hadn't gotten to yet. To remedy that, this year I played Minish Cap, Twilight Princess, Phantom Hourglass, and Skyward Sword. MC was charming. I loved Twilight Princess! It had such strong imagery, intense vibes, and Midna is possibly the best character in the series. Phantom Hourglass was kind of awful and I ended up dropping the game; they took the basic Wind Waker art style and then decided they didn't need to do any actual work on making the game look good. Skyward Sword was a mixed bag and ultimately feels pretty low-to-mid for the series; it's competent enough but excels at very little. And then, of course, there's Tears of the Kingdom, which I mostly loved. It's an impressively dense game with a world that feels very lived in, and it makes some smart balancing changes coming from Breath of the Wild. I wasn't too fond of the ending, though.

I went on a bit of an Etrian Odyssey kick, too. After Untold 2, I was really craving more, so I made the jump into the more traditional side of EO with EOIV. I had so much fun building my party and coming up with their personalities and backstories.

Here are some more highlights from the year:

Hades. Supergiant doesn't miss!

As a side adventure to my FE obsession, I played Dark Deity, an indie FE-like. It was quite fun early on, but became more tedious later, as well as much buggier. I eventually dropped it, but I'll be curious to see how the sequel turns out.

Voice of Cards: the Isle Dragon Roars. This game has a card-based aesthetic where you flip over cards to reveal the world map. It was great to play on the Switch touch screen, and I'll be sure to check out the other VoC games in the future.

Tactics Ogre: Let Us Cling Together. I've been chipping away at this game on and off since last year. There's a lot of great stuff in here, and I can see why it's considered an early SRPG classic, but it also feels clunky and underdeveloped in places. Still, it's a Matsuno game, so it has an excellent sense of place and politics.

Final Fantasy XII: The Zodiac Age. My second Matsuno game of the year! Starts off strong, but eventually the story pacing slows and you run out of new abilities to learn, so I did kind of rush the ending after a while.

Professor Layton vs Phoenix Wright. A much meatier game than I expected from a crossover title, this is probably one of my favourite Layton games. I do think the villain got off easy, though.

Resident Evil 2 Remake. This was my pick for Spooky Month, and it was a good one!

Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions. My third Matsuno game of the year, and the best game I played this year. I've attempted it multiple times before but always got stuck somewhere or other. I suppose I'm finally old enough to wrap my head around its mechanics, and I'm so glad. I was truly blown away and could not stop thinking about FFT for a week after beating it. That ending!!

I also continued my quests through the Yakuza series (Kiwami 2) and Higurashi (chapters 4 and 5), replayed the excellent Dissidia Duodecim Final Fantasy for the first time since I was a teen, and put hundreds of hours into Splatoon 3 and dozens into Theatrhythm Final Bar Line. The latter is part of why I moved FFXII and FFT up my list, so I could have greater appreciation for their soundtracks while playing TFBL.

I'm likely to go on a bit of an SMT kick again next year with SMT V, Soul Hackers 2, and/or Persona 5 Strikers. I've also been wanting to replay Fire Emblem Awakening with new context, as well as do my third run of Three Houses. Other than that, I have a lot of Wii U virtual console titles to get to now. That'll include my first forays into some classic Nintendo series like Metroid and Pikmin, so it should be a good time!

[yourqueenb]

Gab

Since we’re on the topic of MC’s flirting, can we just quickly talk about how bad some of the dialogue was? 😬 Not exactly a narrative issue, but still prominent enough that it needs to be commented on because it only got worse as the story progressed. And honestly it wasn’t just the corny pickup lines. It was also the excessive interjections and puns during fight scenes. But I don’t want to waste too much time on this because it isn’t exactly unique to this book. Choices has its fair share of cringeworthy lines in other books. I think it was just intensified in this one because of all the other blunders they made.

Gear

Something that was more of a problem for this particular story was the gadgets. The cool devices and weapons agents get to use have always been a notable part of the spy genre. But imo the ones in this book were lame af and also kind of few and far between. We got an electric glove, the Identi-print, infrared goggles, and an electrostick (which was somehow still supposed to be enticing even though we already had the glove). Like these people work at what’s most likely a multi-million, maybe even billion, dollar agency. Why is the woman they were originally tasked to use as an informational asset basically reinventing the wheel and making clunky items that GAIA has probably had stored in their basement for 10+ years?

And despite what it may sound like, this is more of a dig at the writers than Vivian because I don’t actually mind that she was making things for MC and the LI. But where is the imagination??? Idk I just find it hard to believe that they couldn’t come up with anything better than a fingerprint scanner, something you can buy online, and two objects that do the same thing for diamond choices 😒 If anything, the scanner and goggles should’ve been free. And they could’ve chosen one of either the glove or electrostick to include as one of a few other premium gadgets offered throughout the book.

The one positive was that all of the items truly were extras (as premium options should be). But even with that, none of them were used enough to make them worth it. I got the electric glove, which I believe was used the most and was probably also the most novel of the options. But honestly, I could’ve gone without it. So I’m glad I didn’t waste diamonds on any of the other ones.

Garb

Last but certainly not least though was the fashion. Y’all know I have to at least mention it. I was sorely disappointed in pretty much every outfit except for the auction dress. And I really shouldn’t be surprised because PB is known for making ugly outfits atp. But this was their chance to redeem themselves just a little bit. Yet as per usual, the did not understand the assignment.

A spy should literally and figuratively be dressed to kill always. Sleek, sexy, and sophisticated. Those are some of the other qualities I think of when I hear the word. But the wardrobe we got was the exact opposite of those things. An ill-fitting casino dress, a boring suit, diaper pants. A MESS. Not to mention the fact that they did actually create another decent outfit, but it was completely the wrong time for MC to be wearing it! Like why would I pay to give her pneumonia and frostbite because she’s wearing a bra top in the middle of a Russian snowstorm 🤦🏽‍♀️ And this is coming from someone who normally doesn’t mind slightly unrealistic outfits in these kinds of books/movies because those types of things are usually close to my style. But they had to know that was ridiculous 😒 And I’m afraid I’ll never understand why the closet is something Choices constantly struggles with.

[bainhardt]

Marchcember 2024 SPRING do - Part 2

I suppose it's fortunate this isn't a proper December To-Do, because next game off the list isn't even really backlog, although it is a similar enough scenario to Mega Serval which also got a post... We'll just say this one's more of a "March Playing a Video Game." I bought Dragon's Dogma: Dark Arisen earlier this month on sale and even finished it in time for this name scheme to still make sense! With my track record, it's practically a miracle this was done with such fast turnaround.

I had my feelings on the game already figured out during my playthrough at about exactly "half-fun." If I didnt like anything about it I wouldn't have bothered finishing, as should be pretty obvious. But there was no shortage of griping along the way. I'm already reminded of a couple other games, saying that...

I absolutely hated traveling. Dunno exactly why but the stamina running out on me all the time made it not fun in the least to explore. It was doubly cruel for the game to give infinite stamina inside Gran Soren, suggesting they did realize that idea had merit. Why not only have limited stamina during combat? The thought had me desperate for Elden Ring's design. At the same time, blaming this whole issue on stamina alone would feel wrong when I know I enjoyed similar games like Skyrim in their day.

I guess to hit on all my scattered thoughts on the subject - movement reminded me of Legends Arceus; the control didn't feel properly snappy and responsive and "fun." Clunky is the descriptor here. Also, the swarms of enemies in the wilderness are entirely pointless. This is maybe the only action game I remember playing that had random encounters. There wasn't much in the way of exp or loot to be gained from fighting my five-hundredth wolf or bandit, and it certainly wasn't fun to do for its own sake, so I employed the age-old technique from RPGs: I ran the fuck away constantly. And finally, the lack of any kind of quick travel was initially a huge turn-off for me, but as I progressed and discovered the portcrystals, I can give them, again, about half credit for this one. I think giving the player a limited number of warp points is a fairly unique compromise... but I would really prefer the warps themself be infinite. I can say with confidence that without the Dark Arisen infinite ferrystone, I wouldn't have played this one for very long.

As for the other side of our basic foundation mechanics, combat gets a "fine" from me. The third-person action approach is cool, but I feel it may have ended up a little too simple. This part reminded me, strangely, of Tactics Ogre (not a good sign); I never once felt like I had to change or reevaluate anything I was doing for the entire game. I learned three Thief skills right at the beginning and mashing the same buttons over and over always worked, so I had no reason to broaden my horizons. Trip enemy with rope, hit enemy with flurry attack. Dunno if that's typical because I haven't played many games like this. And I can imagine what you're thinking: you're supposed to branch out because you want to experience the other possibilities! ...Well, I think it's important to say I didn't really find combat so fun that I wanted to do it any more than necessary, or as said earlier, for its own sake.

Which establishes the main idea here: if the core gameplay loops the game spends most of its time asking you do to are not particularly fun for you, playing it can feel more like a chore. The proportion is so important, too. How much do you like and how much do you wish you could skip? It feels so stupid to talk about it like it's not obvious, but I think it's a huge underlying element of the games that lose me somewhere or other. I just want it to be all good.

So I'll take that as the turning point to talk about stuff that was good! I really love the Arisen/Pawn system of the game, both mechanically and narratively. It made for a fascinating world setting. I initially wanted to know the story because of this, though I don't know for sure I got all of it because I was averse to doing anything other than what was strictly necessary (sorry). The Pawn AI was also fairly reliable. They didn't always do what I'd hope, but they never did anything I actively preferred they wouldn't, either. As I've mentioned, I haven't played other games like Dragon Age or whatever, but this feels like it might be the ideal version of your pseudo-D&D RPG experience in a game. You get all the fun of a full party while only needing to fuss over two of the members' finer details. Actually, to that point, I think I would have enjoyed more details to fuss over. Getting to decide more out-of-combat things my Pawn and I should be good and bad at would make outfitting the party even more fun.

Another plus - one of my own making - is that my characters never stopped making me laugh when they were on screen. This game let me create any character I wanted and I was so unsure of what to do I ended up a hulking, dykey Bart Simpson in a Princess Zelda cosplay. But the true star of the show was Tom Scott, who served as my rock and guide throughout Gransys. I don't know what I'd have done without him.

Quest and dungeon design seemed pretty good overall. While perhaps not many, all of the quests I remember felt unique and had me tracking down more interesting objectives than your usual slay monsters X times bullshit (while also cleverly including that through the bulletins). But it warrants repeating that I avoided even considering certain quests because I knew they'd require I carve halfway across the map through mobs of dull enemies feeling no sense of reward or satisfaction, only to do one cool dungeon and then immediately turn around and drudge my way back. Where I did journey, that ferrystone was always pulling a lot of weight.

And to make an important distinction here about the combat: boss fights were great. I enjoyed every boss that I recall - even when these encounters occasionally slowed down to a bit of a slog, I still preferred their far grander-scale slog to trash mobs at their best. Bespoke monster fights should've been like, the only fights in the game... or maybe that would've crossed too far into Capcom's Monster Hunter (though it's still nice for it all to be building towards a conclusion). But yeah, climbing on guys was fun, learning their moves and options, having your Pawns caught in the crossfire and calling out advice and stuff. Loved all that. This is where the game's systems actually engage the player on a proper level. I was chuggin' through items, reading about the myriad status effects I was suffering, smacking my forehead as That Same Pawn went down for the umpteenth time at the least opportune moment. To return to my point about proportions from before, boss fights felt like the only reward the rest of the drudgery in the game kept me wanting after, and they're easily the best memories from it. I specifically chose to fight the dragon at the end because I wanted to beat ass one last time! Polish up the combat a little and give me further ways to customize my characters around unique challenges and threats posed by these monsters, and I'd be begging for more.

Damn this got longer than I intended. To conclude, I'm glad that I got this game done and relatively quickly, but I am definitely not begging for more. I didn't even buy it because I wanted to play DD2... I just thought the Monster Factory episode was funny.

[veebs-hates-video-games]

There are as usual a bunch of things I've played that I have things to say about but haven't said yet and a bunch of things I've wanted to play that I haven't played yet, and a lot of that has been because of trouble getting my Concerta refilled. Now that that's finally hopefully sorted out for the immediate (and hopefully indefinite) future maybe I'll make a little bit of progress on both of those things, but in the meantime I started replaying Xenoblade Chronicles 2 instead because for some reason those games are something I can usually do even when my brain doesn’t work. I forgot how weak the first 2-3 chapters are compared to the entire rest of the game (and almost all parts of all other games in the series too), but once it finally gets going there’s lots of good stuff.

That’s not why I’m here right now though. I finally kind of impulsively grabbed the first Atelier Ryza game because I’d been meaning to check it out for a while, it was on sale, and I needed to not go over my annoyingly low bank account limit and get kicked off SSI. I have such mixed feelings about it a few hours in, which my ranting on Discord can explain.

viBRAToryblurriness: Also initial thoughts of Atelier Ryza: it has the worst opening sections of any game I've played in a long time

viBRAToryblurriness: Not even bad, just totally fails to be engaging in any way until you slog through the first hour or however long it takes to unlock being able to do literally anything

viBRAToryblurriness: The characters start out pretty generic and there's almost nothing you can interact with at first before you learn how to harvest and craft stuff, which takes way too long to be given to you

viBRAToryblurriness: You're just running through reasonably nice looking environments with absolutely nothing you can do in them at first, like not even most of the people can be talked to

viBRAToryblurriness: Once it finally gets going it seems like it has potential though, even if the crafting system is moderately poorly explained

viBRAToryblurriness: But also even then it feels like a mid-budget PS3 game with more polygons

viBRAToryblurriness: Like the world has moved forward but this game absolutely has not other than spending more money on art

viBRAToryblurriness: Also more money on boobs and thighs, which are present in truly preposterous levels for something that presents itself as so wholesome

viBRAToryblurriness: I swear every female character has boobs the size of their head and thighs the size of their torso, even if they're not adults1

viBRAToryblurriness: Video games continue to be a mistake

viBRAToryblurriness: But also I can harvest crabs from a barrel and use alchemy to transmute them into...I forget, maybe it was desserts?

viBRAToryblurriness: Bombs?

viBRAToryblurriness: I don't even know

viBRAToryblurriness: I know sea urchins can be turned into explosives, and also they come from trees, because reasons

viBRAToryblurriness: Atelier Ryza really should've taken like 20%+ of its art budget and put it toward like...making other stuff actually good instead of just good enough

viBRAToryblurriness: Like take a few extra months to figure out slightly less clunky menus, explain how things work a bit more clearly, and do a bunch of polish on various things

viBRAToryblurriness: And like spend a few weeks doing research on how other games have solved those problems since like 2008

viBRAToryblurriness: The crafting system seems potentially pretty flexible and interesting...after I looked up online how a couple basic things about it work because the game failed to explain them

viBRAToryblurriness: And the combat system is increasingly satisfying the more stuff gets unlocked, because the more stuff you do in a fight the more it rewards you by giving you what you need to do even more stuff, so it kinda snowballs if you do it right

viBRAToryblurriness: But then there are so many little things that just Should Not Be That Way if they'd had a few more months to make it actually good

viBRAToryblurriness: Like the range for interacting with things always feels slightly off from what it should be compared to every other game I've played in the past five years

viBRAToryblurriness: Or it not explaining that you have effectively infinite storage but a limited inventory, but your limited inventory is only limited when you're in places with enemies and not at home, and you have to go through a couple menus to check how much more space you have instead of there being a quick and easy way to see, which should really be in the HUD when gathering items is like half the game, and it tells you none of this or that they're automatically transferred to storage when you go back home

viBRAToryblurriness: Or like...everything else in the game is basically like that too

viBRAToryblurriness: It's always oh that's a neat idea that would be good if they'd spent another 20 minutes thinking about how to implement it before actually putting it in the game, or they figured out a good way to do it but needed to do another pass on it to fix weird quirks with it

viBRAToryblurriness: Also progressing the story is absolutely baffling

viBRAToryblurriness: Sometimes it doesn't advance because it doesn't wanna, sometimes it advances on its own without me doing the very specific things it told me to do, sometimes little skits pop up when I enter an area that feel that they're chronologically out of order

PJ O'Reilly of Nintendo Life [...] also recognized the game for its emotional narrative and strong main characters

viBRAToryblurriness: I assume all of that must happen later, because I've found no evidence of either so far

viBRAToryblurriness: Like they're fine, but so far it's all extremely generic

viBRAToryblurriness: It's like the least interesting starting party possible in a Tales game

viBRAToryblurriness: Not bad, because that would be interesting, just most of the game is the embodiment of "fine, I guess" so far

Also the map and minimap could use some work, and the camera is tolerable but not great and has the typical problem I have specifically more often with Japanese games than anything else where the max setting for camera speed needs to be straight up doubled before I’d be happy with it.

And sure that seems like a lot of complaining, and it is, but the stuff that works works well enough that I’m still going through it a bit at a time, and it has gradually been getting better overall. I hope it keeps that up to the point that it can make up for the fairly large pile of minor annoyances it’s accumulated so far.

[borkthemork]

Something has been bugging the hell out of me with the robot throughout the course of the trailer.

We know that Andrias is still able to use teleportation of the robots. We could even see during the Christmas shot that Andrias or some kind of robot was able to break through to Earth to probably start the invasion.

As a war strategist, it would make sense to bring up a custom and multi-utility robot to capture or kill Anne since Andrias has made it clear that Anne is a threat and having her warn Earth about the oncoming invasion would set him back when it comes to the ambush aspect of his plan.

And this man appears to have a lot of resources, right?

Like not only does he have a shitton of factories that are able to create numerous fighting machines, but these robots are also really effective in destruction, too? We could see with Friend or Frobo that Frobo (a defective bot, no less) could make so much damage on an unexpected population, and this man has a shitton of them.

It wouldn’t be much of a hassle for this man to be able to conserve his resources with the amount of damage one robot could do to something like a farm town.

Another thing, the robots found in Amphibia are very much into directives, mimicry, and orders.

Of course, the example with Frobo is not that accurate, since from the implications of Andrias, Frobo’s nature of protecting Polly (and overall being more emotive and sentimental) as an objective looks to make him defective since he was never given the order to follow Andrias in the first place.

Other than that though, the objective for many of these robots are to follow orders to the letter. They follow their creator, and with the destruction of Frobo’s previous factory there’s an interesting tidbit about how Frobo seemed dormant, without a clear goal, and yet he decided to follow the Plantar’s direction with some clunky results but he still fulfilled it, right?

I think that same idea, of the robots being obedient to objectives but still being clunky in execution, follow the same thing with the robots found in True Colors.

After all, they’re just AI. They sometimes can’t differentiate between when to stop themselves from firing due to a friendly combatant being in the way, all they know is the objective.

So with the exterminator robot, look at how it behaves and especially the way it’s designed.

We know that this robot is a very versatile variant. It’s basically created to maneuver around rough terrain with ease and overall be effective in chasing, specifically. It would make sense for Andrias to bring this robot to Earth.

However, the thing that concerns me is the fact that this robot, this supposedly ‘follow-the-directive-and-never-deviate-until-the-objective-is-done’ robot, is able to do something like repairing itself with items from Earth.

Think about it. This robot came from Amphibia, sure Amphibia had a massive technological age back in the day, but Newtopia never got around to invading Earth, and Earth has progressed heavily ever since a thousand years of Andrias’s last active technological reign.

How does this robot know how to repair itself with items like construction material, what looks to be random metal, and a buzzsaw? And this also implies that if the robot was amputated from one of its limbs, it still had the intelligence to basically maneuver around without said limb (especially the leg) and be able to stitch itself back together again due to it having knowledge of its own components and how it could meld together effectively with the foreign objects.

And I know those new limbs are able to move and are cooperative with the robot itself since if you look at the two screenshots above, that robot just moved the construction arm almost as if it were a functional limb!

This robot is too intelligent for a regular variant. It knows too much about self-preservation, about engineering itself, and how Earth items work.

Then think about this: The fact the robot has to repair itself in the first place is concerning by itself.

We know that the robots take their objectives to the letter, but why did Andrias engineer the robot to be self-preserving specifically? This man has so many resources under his belt and still has the music box being functional, so it wouldn’t be much of a hassle for him to send two more robots or so if all else failed. But he doesn’t.

It’s almost as if this robot knows that failure isn’t an option. That if this robot goes back empty-handed or gets destroyed in the process, then that would be it, there would be no going back from its failure.

[blackswaneuroparedux]

Anonymous asked: What do you make of Oswald Spengler’s “Decline of the West” book and the thesis he presents? Does it have any value at all?

Few questions have preoccupied Western minds as insistently as those which probe the reasons for the rise and fall, or the progress and decay, of all man-willed ventures on earth, including nations, states, and cultures. In the West especially such navel gazing has been particularly acute since the Middle Ages down to our modern age.

Was the West destined to slide into retreat? How does one know just what is rising, what by contrast dying? And what exactly is meant by “decline” in the world of different cultures? Questions such as these have always been the purview of religious prophets of doom or philosophers. Oswald Spengler was one of the first modern historians to try and make sense of the past by asking “Is there a logic of history? Is there, beyond all the casual and incalculable elements of separate events, something that we may call a metaphysical structure of historic humanity…?” This German historian straddling the late 19th Century and the beginning of the 20th Century certainly thought so.

As a curious teen I came across an old copy of Spengler’s Der Untergang des Abendlandes (The Decline of the West) sitting anonymously and gathering dust on my grandfather’s book shelves in his library alongside similar books with epic sounding titles by Arnold Toynbee and Edward Gibbon. I was put off by it firstly because my German wasn’t that great at the time and secondly, the prose seemed a little too stuffy for someone as impatient as I was to waste time over. It was a few years later at university I finally gave him another chance and tried reading it again.

Even then I knew very little about Spengler other than that he was one of many ambitious intellectuals who had attempted a systematically interpretive, or meta-historical, record of human events - a sort of world history. Spengler equated meta-history with the nature of history, the meaning of history and the cause and significance of historical change.

Spengler achieved immense popularity after his publication of The Decline of the West in wake of the First World War first in 1918 and then re-published in 1922. His intellectual legacy lingered into the middle of the 20th Century. It was about this time in the mid-1960s that a precocious young Roger Scruton at Cambridge became fascinated by Spengler’s vision: “how rewarding it has been to wrestle with his influence and, finally, to cast him aside.”

As Scruton airily notes, there are simply too many issues with the clunky sounding ‘Spenglerism’ to adopt it as a plausible worldview. 

So why study it at all?

Undoubtedly the very subject of his magnum opus, Western decline, is always of relevance. Like Edward Gibbon’s flawed but brilliant history of the Roman Empire, it is admirably conceived. And there is something to be said for studiously dissecting a major philosophical work at first hand, even if one ends up critiquing it mercilessly.

If the study of the past were left entirely to mere chroniclers of kings and queens and a dry laundry list of dates, history would never have attained the position that it holds in the modern world. It was only when history entered into relations with philosophy at the hands of Montesquieu and Voltaire, Hume, Robertson and Gibbon, that it became an invaluable tool to aid modern thought and understand our place in the world.

Of course meta-histories, as popular as they are now, has its downside too. There is the temptation to oversimplification and the manipulation of evidence to fit an eloquent and compelling narrative. But there has never been any lack of interest in the topic. It explains the best-selling Outline of History by Spengler’s contemporary, H. G. Wells. Such comparative studies existed even in ancient times (e.g. Polybius). Later meta-history often took on the role of ersatz metaphysics - a kind of secular theology. Marx is the obvious example.

Ironically, the foundational work of universal history, which set the pattern for all subsequent attempts, is St. Augustine’s Christo-centric City of God - one of the most significant books in the Western canon.

There is no doubt that Spengler as a pioneer in his field as a historian and as a theorist. In the 1920s he carved out a nice little niche as a pioneer in the discipline that would come to be known as ‘world history’. His complaints about Eurocentrism were novel for his era, keeping in mind that he wrote well before such views were trendy or ideologically loaded.

Spengler challenges the assumption that Europe be, “treated as a steady pole, a unique patch chosen on the surface of the sphere for no better reason, it seems, than because we live on it - and great histories of millennial duration and mighty far-away Cultures are made to revolve around this pole in all modesty.” He was referring to the major civilisations of Egypt, China and India. What compels Spengler to such insights also involves a degree of cultural and ethical relativism - something I don’t have there time to get into here.

He also rightly complains that the division of history into ‘Ancient,’ ‘Medieval’ and ‘Modern’ is a “meaningless scheme” which has “dominated our historical thinking.” There is the questionable “expedient of shifting the initial point of ‘modern history’ from the Crusades to the Renaissance, or from the Renaissance to the beginning of the 19th Century.” The Latin term modernus originally referred to what was contemporary. But with the rise of rationalist thought the concept of “modernity” acquired overtones of inexorable progress and the quasi-religious idea of a “terminus” of human development.

Related to this is Spengler’s description of the millenarian speculations of Joachim of Floris (1145-1202). The unorthodox medieval cleric posited the idea of three spiritual epochs: the Age of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit - the latter corresponding to an earthly paradise. Spengler describes him as “the first thinker of the Hegelian stamp”; as one who birthed the “Gnostic world conception” that took hold of modernist eschatology, particularly in the theories of Karl Marx. A later German scholar, Eric Voegelin (1901-1985), would examine the dangers of the Joachimite perspective in his own meta-historical researches.

There are sound reasons for Spengler’s critique of Enlightenment optimism: “The future of the West is not a limitless treading upwards and onwards for all time towards our present ideals.” As understood in terms of his theory of cultural cycles, recent history is not “the highest point of an ascending straight line”; rather, it is a “stage of life which may be observed in every Culture which has ripened to its limit.” In other words, Western civilisation is analogous to any great culture of the past - not only in its maturation, expansion and refinement, but also its inevitable enfeeblement and deterioration. As to the accuracy of this assessment (however plausible), it remains open to further scrutiny.

Reflections on Spengler allow for the thought that his own biography is an eloquent metaphor for one of the most pervasive themes in his work, that, namely, which centres upon the place of the creative individual in culture, society, and time. Spengler held with Goethe that humanity is an abstraction, and that there have always been only men (and women). Only the individual - der Einzelne - thinks and has ideas. Humanity, or mankind, he notes, has no goal, no plan, and no ideas; it is an empty term. These were not fashionable thoughts in an age marked by crass materialism and totalitarian systems of rule, but Spengler never wavered in his commitment to acknowledge the primacy of ideas and the distinctiveness of men who bring them forth.

In praising the wondrous life of ideas, however, Spengler never forgot that all life is change, that concepts undergo transformation and that becoming and declining are two aspects of one and the same organic process. Contrary to numerous respected theorists and historians in the Occident, who accentuate the themes of evolution in their work and who are programmatically “upbeat” in conjecturing the future in terms of progress, Spengler was convinced that the full measure of life can be discovered only when decline and decay are perceived and assessed as clearly as beginning and becoming. It is this dual focus that seems to have irritated many of his detractors, causing them to charge Spengler with the social sin of pessimism.

Spengler was quite conscious of this clash of orientations in the West. He knew that men are generally disdainful of experience and that, driven by limitless and uncontrolled hope, they like to conceptualise the future in terms of what they consider the desirable rather than the likely course of events. In counterpoint to these, in his view, irrational trends, he remarked that optimism is naive and in some respects even vulgar, and that it surely stands for cowardice when one is afraid to face the fact that life is fleeting and transient in all its aspects.

These thoughts touch a major motif in Spengler’s philosophy which critics tend to ignore, namely the recognition of the place of tragedy in the Occidental cultural world. Tragic modes of experiencing life can only evolve there, where the individual human being is presumed autonomous in his feelings, thoughts, and actions, and where he is therefore vulnerable to the agony of having to make choices between conflicting interests and commitments. They are thus absent in the high cultures of the Orient, where human beings are generally subsumed in the superior concept of the consensus or in the social roles assigned them. In fact, they have been fully developed only in the cultures of the West, and in this context, again, Spengler suggests that they have been more enduring in continental Europe than in England, where they atrophied under the weight of utilitarianism and pragmatism, and in the United States, where “the longing for the happy ending” came to set the tone for life.

Spengler’s pessimism, then, is strictly qualified. And the same holds for his determinism. He notes that there is nothing absolutely inevitable about the passage from one phase in the history of a culture, a nation, or a state to the other, and that none of these three organisms is bound to wither away. Decline will set in only when living human beings choose to play light with their society’s moral and legal ground rules and when they voluntarily indulge in the mechanisation of their intellectual and sentimental lives. Indices of decline are man-made, after all - hence Spengler’s distinction between possible and actual culture.

Just as Spengler himself had the courage to fathom the idea of decline without ever suspending efforts to arrest this process, so he seems to have believed that intelligent men must always be ready to size up the epoch and the milieu in which they find themselves so that they may take constructive action in response to the demands of the hour. Statesmanship in particular, he tells us, is just not conceivable without this dimension of thought.

As I get older, and perhaps more cranky in my ways,  it’s hard not to disagree with his concept of culture and civilisation, especially with the idea of living organism - I do believe that everything in our world is strongly connected with nature and we should always remember such a salient truth. The decline of a culture is a natural process and can’t be hidden, therefore, it should be just noticed. People should not forget about their roots, traditions and values somehow people could prolong the process of constant decline or maybe even change it by living in balance and harmony with each other, the nature itself and, of course, with ourselves.

It’s easy to dismiss Spengler as a dour Germanic party pooper with his pessimistic take on both culture and civilisation. But the more one lives and experiences the world the more realistic it seems. Spengler gives us the aesthetic and mental tool kit in discerning and understanding of the process we pass through, no matter which culture we belong to because the final step of each culture is civilisation.

I would urge to try reading ‘Decline of the West’ if you have the time and the patience. Otherwise wait for a highly anticipated biography of Oswald Spengler by Ben Lewis called ‘Oswald Spengler and the Politics of Decline’ which is out in July 2022. Lewis sets out to explain Spengler’s ideas within the context of his life and experiences within Weimar Germany.

Thanks for your question.

[cuquitalocita]

smile and lie- feysand

AN: no, this isn’t a part three to kids and car rides (BUT IT IS IN PROGRESS)-  i just had a dream about it and had to write it- hope you like it :)

~~

“So we meet again.” 

Rhys grinned at the annoyed-looking redhead across from him. There was no doubt in his mind that the man wanted to strangle him every time he saw him and Rhys wasn’t sure if he could blame him. 

Folding his hands behind his head, Rhys leaned back in the uncomfortable office chair and gazed at his principal. 

“How’ve you been Mr. Vanserra?”

“Worse and worse every time I see you, Rhysand. Worse and worse.” His principal pushed his chair away from his desk; Rhys tracked the movement with his eyes in silence. 

“Not that I don’t love our weekly chats, Mr. Vanserra- because I do. I absolutely adore them.” The man rolled his eyes as Vice-Principal Helion walked through the doors and sat in the seat next to him, both now facing Rhys. He should’ve shrunk under their gazes. His grin only grew. “But why am I here? Again?” 

Helion sighed, his head falling into his hands and running over his face in blatant frustration. 

“Tell me this, Mr. Knight. You are aware that there are other students at this school, correct?” Rhys raised his brows. 

“This is news to me.” Helion ignored him, continuing forward. 

“And because of this, I and other faculty members have other students- other issues to worry about, than you acting up.” Rhys grinned as Mr. Vanserra nodded his agreement. “From the first day of your freshman year, Rhysand, you have been nothing more than a menace to the faculty and teachers in this institution.” 

Rhys felt kind of offended. He knew Mr. Tarquin liked him- even if he pretended not to. And he didn’t consistently try to make life any harder for them than they had to be. Sort of. 

“Being a distraction in class, using the fragile and- might I add- expensive lab equipment to perform practical jokes-” Rhys snorted at the mention of his and Cassian’s joke sophomore year. In his defense, the sulfur wasn’t supposed to react that much. “...disrespecting your teachers, trying the patience of your coach, and now vandalism.” 

Rhys kept his face impassive. He swore the principal had some sort of grudge against him. Any minor inconvenience and bam- Rhysand Knight was to blame. To be fair, he was to blame for this. But vandalism was a harsh term for it. He and Mor had gotten bored after school the day prior and had found a few half-empty spray paint bottles.  

It had been a short Baudelaire quote, not a threat of murder, and the white paint had been barely visible with its awful quality. Rhys held back the roll of his eyes- of course Vanserra would rail him for this. 

He crossed his arms over his chest, his leather jacket stretching uncomfortably, and eyed his superiors with thinly veiled disinterest. He opened his mouth to respond. 

“Look-” Whatever bullshit he was going to spew about his innocence came to a halt as the door to the office breezed open, revealing an out-of-breath girl. The men in front of him turned their attention to her as well, and Rhys breathed a silent sigh of relief from the momentary break. 

He gazed silently at the girl in the doorway, sporting clunky combat boots and a denim jacket, both splattered with a variety of paint colors. Her cheeks were flushed and her chest was heaving as if she had literally sprinted to the office, and her blue-grey eyes immediately pinned him in place. 

She was pretty- beautiful, even. But she was a complete stranger to him. 

Rhys was sure her confused frown mirrored his own and the girl narrowed her eyes as Vanserra stood, folding his hands in front of him and clearing his throat. 

“Miss Archeron,” he greeted, tone cold. “Thank you for joining us.” 

She arched a brow, taking the seat next to Rhys’s own. She mimicked his own posture, crossing her arms in front of her and leaning back in her chair. Her boot tapped against the ground in a quiet rhythm. 

“My pleasure,” she replied, her tone holding more snark than it should, considering who was across from her. The only person Rhys was aware of who had the guts to speak like that to their superiors was him. 

But her voice was honey-sweet- it suited her. 

Still- he had no idea who she was. He tried not to turn to her as her lilac scent enveloped him and instead stared at the principal. 

“Now that we’re all here,” Helion took a deep breath and locked his gaze on the Archeron girl. “The two of you were caught vandalizing school property yesterday between the hours of three and four PM, using spray paint.”

If Rhys had water in his mouth he would’ve spewed it all over his principal as the words left his mouth. Yes, he had vandalized school property. Yes, it had been after school. And yes, he had used spray paint. But the girl sitting next to him had nothing to do with that. He hadn’t even seen her before now. 

It seemed she was thinking the same thing as she shot him a look from the corner of her eye, both of their gazes meeting in an amused, ‘can you believe this?’ Rhys was actually surprised the girl wasn’t glaring daggers at him for somehow dragging her into a mess she had no part in. 

Instead, she just watched the two men in front of her, her lips slightly parted as if in a silent laugh. Rhys noticed a small twinkle in her eye- a twinkle of amusement. 

Vanserra, however, did not find the entire situation amusing and slammed his palm flat down on the desk in front of them. Neither one of them flinched, instead meeting gazes again with intense eyes before turning back to the men in front of them. 

“I don’t know how things worked at your last school, Feyre. But here we don’t tolerate vandalism. It’s rude, destructive, and not to mention a federal crime. I’m not sure how you ended getting mixed up with Mr. Knight here, but it may be the biggest mistake you’ve made since coming to this school.” Rhys would have been offended if it hadn’t been the truth. 

The girl- Feyre, merely raised her brows until they scrunched together as he kept talking. 

“The two of you would be better off admitting to it now before we get the authorities involved. I’m sure the Velaris University of Arts would appreciate knowing exactly who they’re giving a scholarship to. Don’t you, Feyre?”

Whatever response he had expected to get out of her was rewarded with nothing more than the slight stiffening of her shoulders, which only Rhys could feel from beside her. 

What an ass. 

Clearly bringing up something that was important to her- and threatening to take it away for something she had nothing to do with. It must’ve been her hair, he realized. Although Mor was a bright blonde, the shitty camera quality could easily have painted her color darker, making it a golden brown like Feyre’s. 

Rhys was amazed at Feyre’s strong will. She simply stared back at Vanserra in silence, as if daring him to threaten her again. Helion finally sighed, looking at the teenagers with something like pity. 

“Look, you two. I understand that you’re young. And when you’re young, you start to make choices that seem fun because other people are doing it.” 

A sharp laugh shot out of Feyre beside him and she disguised it as a cough. Rhys found his own lips tilting into a smile. He placed his hand over his mouth to cover it as he caught Feyre’s eye once more, her blue-gray eyes glistened with knowing humor- his reflected the same thing. She had a beautiful laugh, and it had his heart flipping uncomfortably in his chest. 

Across from them, Helion cleared his throat. Vanserra was glaring daggers at the two of them and before he could open his mouth to say anything, Feyre’s hand flew to Rhys’s knee. She placed her hand there casually as if they were friends- or even something more- and did it all the time. He attempted not to jerk forward with the electric shock her touch sent through his body. 

What are you doing? Rhys asked her with his eyes.

Just trust me. She seemed to respond in a flash of gray eyes before turning back to the principal and fixing him with a disinterested gaze. 

“Look, you’ve got the wrong girl. I don’t know what time you have us allegedly vandalizing the wall, but I was at work all afternoon yesterday.” Now Rhys felt bad. He had accidentally dragged an innocent girl into this mess with him- and she even had an alibi. 

There was no way Vanserra would believe her, which only left Rhys feeling even more guilty. 

“Yesterday was my first day and I accidentally got lost walking by the football field. Rhysand saw me and skipped practice to walk me to work- that’s why he wasn’t there.” Rhys startled as the lie slipped easily through her lips. He had definitely not walked her to work yesterday. But she was covering for him, so he kept his face impassive. 

Vanserra’s eyes narrowed but Feyre looked unaffected. 

“You can check with my boss if you want. Rhysand was with me from three to… at least four forty-five. There’s no way he was the one you saw in the video. I’m not either, by the way. But again, you’re more than welcome to call my boss and confirm it with her. I’m sure she’d be delighted with your interruption.” 

Feyre’s fingers tapped a calm rhythm on his knee and Vanserra turned the color of his hair under her cool gaze. Rhys had to bite his tongue to keep from letting out a laugh. 

“Well, Miss Archeron, since you seem so inclined to prove your own- and Mr. Knight’s innocence, I may do just that.” Helion grabbed a pen and paper as the principal sneered at the two of them. “Her name?” 

Feyre grinned, her teeth glistening pearly white under the office lights. 

“Amren Cauldron.” 

Every bit of air seemed to be sucked out of the room as Helion’s pen stilled in his hand and Rhys swore his principal flinched. Rhys himself felt his own throat go dry and he attempted to keep his eyes from widening. 

Amren Cauldron was one of- if not the most terrifying woman in Prythian. She was practically a myth since Rhys was a child. The woman- or in most stories- the witch that lived in the corner of town-owned a small book store complete with strange spices and old relics along with books holding languages long since faded. 

A witch she might not have been. But scary and intimidating, not to mention mean? 

That she was. 

Rhys had seen her around town, her old age doing absolutely nothing to alter her terrifying exterior. She was unwrinkled and wicked, with her slits for eyes and cruel smile. 

She’ll eat you with those teeth, Cassian had told him one night when they were eight, hiding under the covers and telling scary stories. But there was no story to be told about Amren Cauldron. She was real, and she was scary, alright. Rhys still heard horror stories about her circling around school from time to time. He had even heard one last week. 

Rhys couldn’t think of a time he had heard a kind word out of her mouth, let alone heard her speak to anyone in town as a friend. Everyone he spoke to chose to keep their distance. Probably the smartest thing to do if he was being honest. 

But here Feyre was, working for her. And through all the myths of Amren eating children, Rhys gazed at Feyre Archeron and decided that he too could easily have a soft spot for the brunette. 

Feyre’s mouth tilted up to the side and she arched a brow. 

“Well? Do you need her phone number?” Feyre turned toward her backpack and began shuffling through it, one of her hands still burning a hole in his knee. “I know I have it here some-”

“That won’t be necessary,” Helion interrupted, his voice higher than it had moments before. Vanserra looked pale and cleared his throat, twisting his fingers on the desk in front of him. 

Rhys and Feyre shared an amused glance, an exhilarated blush dusting her cheeks. 

“We wouldn’t want to interrupt Ms. Cauldron at work,” Vanserra stated, glaring at the teenagers in front of him. 

The principals exchanged a silent conversation before turning back to them and sighing. 

“The two of you are free to go. Now that we think about it, the video was fairly blurry. It could’ve been anyone considering both people had hoodies on. For this reason- and for this reason, only, you’re off the hook.” 

Rhys and Feyre let out a collected sigh of relief. 

“But don’t think,” Vanserra interrupted. “That I won’t be watching the two of you. Vandalism is still a crime. Rhysand, I expect to see you at football practice every day this week.”

Rhys nodded his silent agreement. 

“And my scholarship?” Feyre pressed sharply. Rhys could tell Vanserra was holding back a roll of his eyes as Feyre’s gaze locked onto him. 

“The University will not be informed of this mishap. Your scholarship will remain fully intact.” Feyre smiled, falling back into her seat with a pleased nod.

“Well?” he snapped. “Out of my office.” 

The two teenagers needed no further encouragement as they grabbed their bags and practically booked it out of the office, only letting their grins show after they had turned their backs to the principals. 

By the time the door shut behind them, Rhys had managed to still his incredulity for the girl beside him. He still had no idea how he had never seen her before this encounter, and he knew he would have a hard time if he never saw her again

There was something about Feyre Archeron that intrigued him, and he knew- from the bottom of his soul, that she was something else. 

The two of them walked in silence through the empty halls, everyone still in the middle of their fifth period, leaving the hallways empty and eerie. But Rhys had always liked the silence- liked the solidarity in the middle of ongoing classes. 

He wouldn’t go back to class today. But he would show up for practice- just like he had promised. In the silence of the hallway, Rhys glanced at the girl next to him. 

Feyre’s hair was tied up in a ponytail and if Rhys looked close enough, he was able to see a small splatter of neon green paint by her hair tie. He hid his small smile. Who was this girl? 

“I haven’t seen you around before,” he finally said when the silence became too much. He had a feeling Feyre Archeron wasn’t the type to appreciate a ‘thank you for saving my ass.’

Her gaze snapped to his, gray eyes meeting violet before she gave him a small smile that almost had him floored. 

“You wouldn’t have. I’m new.” Rhys nodded. There was no way he wouldn’t have noticed her in years prior. He wondered just how long she had been walking the halls a stranger to him.

“Well maybe I’ll see you around,” he couldn’t keep himself from saying as Feyre stopped in front of a locker-her locker, and rolled in the combination, opening it to reveal a hot mess of clearly unfinished art projects. She took something out of her backpack and shoved it into the locker. 

“Not if you keep getting caught, you won’t.” 

“Excuse me?” Feyre shut her locker, the sound ringing through the empty hallway, and fixed him with a knowing look. 

“Never mind.” Feyre turned to walk down the opposite hallway but paused before reaching the threshold, turning back with a sly smile. Rhys ignored the pounding of his heart. “Nice pants, by the way.” 

He frowned, confused and unable to resist looking down at his pants. 

His jaw dropped. 

Rhys was an idiot. He hadn’t even bothered to check what jeans he had thrown on earlier that morning and had coincidentally chosen the same ones he had worn the day prior. The same jeans sporting splatters of white spray paint on the right knee. 

Rhys exhaled as he realized the explanation of Feyre’s earlier hand placement. She had been covering up the stain. Saving his ass- again.

He turned back to Feyre only to be faced with the back of her denim jacket as she walked down the hallway, leaving him in the dust. 

“Wait!” Rhys called out, hating how hopeful he sounded. What was he doing? He had never been this fascinated by a girl before. Feyre’s head whipped back around, her ponytail flicking her shoulder with the movement as she pinned him with a curious gaze. “What are your shift hours at Amren’s?” Whether or not he would actually have the guts to walk through the door was another story entirely. 

The smirk that curled on her lips could have been described as nothing less than purely wicked. 

“How should I know? I’ve never even seen the place.”

~~

yeah i think i’m only capable of writing high school feysand... 

@emikadreams​ (hope i did that right idk how tags work)​

[snarktheater]

Ready Player Two — Chapter 10

We open Level Five of the book with lyrics from a Prince song about letting the computer use you. Because, in case you're just coming in, the book has suddenly decided to be about an evil AI who will gleefully murder half a billion people to get the thing he wants.

Except, does that escalation really track? Not regarding the Prince song, I don't have the time to delve into what he meant. But in terms of this story? Even if you wanted to be charitable and say that Ready Player One was critical of its subject matter (and I have written one Harry Potter's worth on why I don't), the subject matter would still be about human failings. Giant corporations using escapism to lull people into ignoring real and pressing problems for a profit while the world goes to shit. Or if you're a liberal, people choosing escapism over solving real problem.

Either way, the escalation to an evil AI doesn't really work. Even the Matrix mentions (the Prince song also has one, and though it's not in the quote, I have to assume it was done on purpose) in the context of this book were made by Samantha in the context of risks to human health and her general distrust of people's complacency in using the OASIS. More escapism stuff, basically.

This is Plato's allegory of the cave, if instead of the main point being that people who got out of the cave were so thoroughly transformed by the experience as to be incomprehensible to the people still inside the cave to the point of looking mad, we just suddenly ignored the whole system and said "remember the puppets whose shadows are cast on the cave walls by a fire? What if one of those puppets gained sentience and used that fire to burn all the people in the cave? Would that be fucked up or what?"

Though maybe I'm the fool for expecting a book that hasn't been able to parse the theme in any of its countless references (including The Matrix) to have a solid grasp of its own themes.

In the story, everyone is panicking from finding out they have ten to twelve hours left to live unless Wade finds six Shards when it took him three years for someone else to find one for him. Well, I'm the only one who knows about that last part, but still.

Wade himself is also suddenly experience a massive hero complex over having all these lives in the balance, because Wade Watts is just such an empathetic guy all of a sudden. And sure, Anorak used his survivor's guilt over his aunt and neighbor's deaths in the previous chapter, but then again, I'll remind you that guilt was really an invention of this book. So even if I can assume that Anorak found out about it because Wade used an NPC therapist and hacking is magic in this world, I still find it really clunky that the book thinks this is a progression of the character that it has earned instead of trying to shoehorn it long after it was too late to matter.

So Wade is in the clutches of what is clearly a panic attack. Which means it's time for Samantha to play therapist.

“Wade?” I heard Art3mis whisper. “Please stop.” The tenderness in her tone, which had once been so familiar to me, now felt completely foreign.

See, this kind of moments is the stuff I live for when doing these write-ups. I read this and go "fucking jackpot". Because yes. Ernest Cline has certainly heard some of the criticism aimed at him, and it shows all over the place. So Wade now tells us he feels grief and guilt about the people he lost, and he now says he's totally fine with trans women or any other kind of gender and sexuality. And the book really tries to hammer in that Wade is not a good guy, and he's aware of it.

But in the small moments, at the times where the book isn't putting everything on hold to tell us about how much it has grown, when it comes time to have something happen, the old world view rears its ugly head and Wade's ex is forced to shoulder the burden of managing his emotions. Not his friends as a whole—which, so far, this book has been dropping hints that it wanted to be about the power of friendship, so I'd argue it would be more salient—but specifically a romantic interest.

And I just think that's pretty revealing about how much growth has actually taken place.

She's successful, of course. This all took a meager page. That's how much lip service the book is willing to pay to Wade's supposed problems. So now it's back to dealing with the problem at hand, while the rest of the cast is still panicking—well, regular panicking, they're not all having panic attacks. Also, all users like Wade who are logged in through some kind of vaults are now locked in completely, because the vaults are designed to be unable to open unless the ONI is disconnected.

Which, as an engineer. It sounds like not a lot of engineers were consulted when building this to me. But maybe they were the same Tesla engineers who built Samantha's plane with a hackable autopilot, and the prison with a security system that was also connected to the Internet.

Since the vaults are locked, this means they can't even initiate what they call a "lobo logout", which is the sort of logout that happens if the ONI is powered off without logging out first, and has a 90% chance of leaving someone in a coma.

(GSS never allowed the public to find out about that last bit, though.)

By all means, do remind me of how little I actually want these characters to succeed.

Anyway, I don't know why the book is even informing us of this, since, again, it has somehow been ruled out by Anorak's firmware update (which he has dubbed an "infirmware update", and I have to inform you of this awful pun because the book has decided to keep using it). The point is: they are 100% totally stuck, and doomed to suffer from Synaptic Overload Syndrome from being in the ONI too long.

“This shit is unbelievable!” [Aech] said. “Faisal, how the hell did our admins let this happen? We’re always saying we have the smartest people on the planet working for us, right? And the ‘best cybersecurity infrastructure ever to exist in human history’? Some shit like that?” “We do,” Faisal said. “But we never anticipated an attack by an AI copy of our deceased CEO! How the hell were we supposed to prevent that? It’s impossible.”

Well, first of all, it clearly isn't. But more importantly, AIs aren't magic. Hacking isn't magic. Computers aren't magic. I can hold my disbelief over a sentient AI, because, you know, it's a science fiction construct. But the ONI, and the OASIS, and those vaults, they're all old-fashioned programs, and those can only do what they're designed to do. So actually, yes, it does raise a lot of questions if these programs were able to do this all along and the only reason they didn't was that there wasn't someone sufficiently evil at the helm.

Like, I've made a couple engineering jokes already, but I'll just say it more clearly this time: the fact that the ONI has redundancies that would keep it powered on in case of a power outage long enough to log out is perfectly fine. But the fact that the ONI's failure state isn't to immediately engage a logout isn't. It shouldn't be a functionality that a firmware update can just turn off, because it should be designed to do it on essentially a mechanical level. That's why electromagnetic locks will open if the power goes out—because the danger that can be caused by someone being trapped by such a lock with no way to open is considered unacceptable. Same thing with, say, a theme park ride: if the power goes out, the mechanical system is designed to minimize damage and risk.

Well, it is in cases of well-designed tech, anyway. Which is my point here: this was all shoddily designed. So either GSS doesn't have the smartest people on the planet, or it does, but management (in this case, Wade and the others pushing for as quick a release of the ONI as possible) interfered in the name of profit to forego proper safety analysis. Which could be saying a lot about capitalism (I've made comparisons to Tesla for that reason), but unfortunately, that's not the commentary the book is making at all.

At the end of this pointing of fingers, they eventually regain their composure and determination to work through it. Except Samantha—or at least, so Wade says. The book tries to pretend she'll rail into them because she was right all along, but no, she just gives a pep talk about how they can totally beat Anorak if they work together.

Again: great to have her shoulder all the burden of managing these people's emotions. Groundbreaking. Never seen before.

At the end of the pep talk, Wade reveals what the Robes of Anorak allowed him to do, which his friends look thrilled to find out, but Faisal reveals that GSS staff already figured out. They haven't reverse-engineered it, but they can at least determine if the Robes of Anorak are within a given space. This mostly means that they can at least be sure Anorak isn't listening in on them right now.

“Jesus,” Aech said, shaking her head. “So much for our famous user privacy policy.”

Oh, wait until Wade tells you what he's been doing with Lohengrin's information.

Samantha still thinks they should assume Anorak is spying on them, just to be safe, which somehow translates to only saying sensitive information inside the head office. So. Sure, let's just accept that or we'll be here all day. I've already ranted far too much about engineering shit for one chapter.

Faisal also gives Wade Bracelets of Detection, which will alert him of the presence of the Robes of Anorak if they are nearby. Which the GSS engineers were able to make because the plot said so. Again. Not going to waste my time questioning this.

But speaking of secrets Wade kept, Samantha also forces him to confess about the Big Red Button. This immediately prompts Faisal and Shoto to list all the things that would shut down if the OASIS truly went offline, and they act like it was irresponsible of Halliday to implement this self-destruct.

“Mr. Watts, if you—or anyone else—ever presses that button, it would disrupt global communications, law enforcement, transportation, and commerce….The world would be thrown into complete chaos.” Shoto nodded. “The entire drone protection force would go offline and remain offline,” he added. “There would be shipping delays, food and medicine shortages. Rioting. Markets would crash. States would fail.” He shook his head. “Jesus, the whole of human civilization might even collapse.”

Of course, isn't the actual irresponsible thing to have tied all these things to a single piece of software owned by a private company? Or living in a system where it was even possible for a company to own such a thing in the first place?

Taking down the OASIS (even manually for a few seconds by turning off the servers) would also kill the hostages, by the way, so that's not an option either. Are we really going to spend an entire chapters ruling possibilities out? For a book that's been so fond of glossing over a lot of details in the past, you'd think they would do this in a chapter skip rather than this tedious point-by-point debunking.

The crew also briefly speculate about whether Anorak might want to press the Big Red Button himself, if he has a backup of himself somewhere, and that Sorrento might help him with that. I don't know if that's plausible, but I guess we'll toss it on the pile of theories.

Also, this:

“Anorak has completely rewritten the firmware in some sort of programming language they’ve never seen before. They don’t even know how to disassemble or decompile the code, and even if they could, they don’t think they would be able to understand it.”

Okay, so. All software ultimately runs what is known as machine code. That's because computers are, you know, ultimately just a pile of electronic circuit, and machine code is basically just "do this with that component". Programming languages are all just fancy ways to create layers of abstraction between a programmer and that machine language. Decompiling just means taking the executable (which would be machine language or close to it) and turning it back to a human-friendly language.

So for a device like the ONI, you can't just "write framework in a different language" and have that work out. For code to run on a physical device, it has to be in the ONI's machine language. Potentially, if the ONI runs some kind of operating system, it might be in that system's native language, but even so, it has to be in a specific language to run at all. And I don't even know why you'd need the excuse! Reading complex machine language is already super complicated as it is, and for something as complicated as the ONI would be, you'd probably have to just reverse-engineer it to understand what it does.

Is this at all relevant to the book's quality? No, not really. But at least you got a crash course on the basics of how computers work out of it. And isn't that fun?

Well, I had fun.

They also rule out rolling back to the previous firmware, because that would require logging out to install it.

“OK,” Aech said. “Then we give him what he wants. Like, right fucking now. Whatever the Siren’s Soul is, it can’t be worth risking half a billion lives….” “Og apparently thought it was,” Art3mis said. “Otherwise, he would have given it to Anorak. But he refused….” She locked eyes with me. “We’re missing something here.”

Well, first of all, you don't know that Ogden was issued that same threat. In fact, it seems unlikely he was, since people would probably have noticed being unable to log out before now. Second of all, he could just be wrong. The Siren's Soul is almost certainly connected to his wife in some way, so to him it might be worth half a billion lives, but that doesn't make it so.

But since Samantha's concerns are promptly dismissed, I assume she's right. But before they leave, Shoto points out they should probably put out a statement to the people who are being held hostage, which Faisal immediately dismisses.

“I believe that would be an extraordinarily bad idea, sir,” he said. “We don’t want to create a global panic—or admit any liability for this situation—until we have no other choice.”

I mean, given that the panic is bound to happen when people try to log out and can't, it's pretty clear what his priorities actually are here.

Oh, but wait, because he also suggests to flat-out lie and say it's just a minor glitch and people will be logged out automatically when they hit their twelve hour limit.

“If we can pull that off, our customers will never know their lives were in danger, and that would save GSS billions in lawsuits.”

And yet, all of our main characters agree to this, including Samantha this time around. Because they are all awful, awful people. So they put out a statement, and give everyone free credits as an apology.

Faisal told us this was just an extra precaution, because each time our users logged on they were already clicking Agree to an end-user license that classified our headsets as experimental technology and absolved GSS of any liability for injuries.

I just love how Wade has no thoughts regarding any of this. But sure, I'm supposed to think this man cares about the cost in human lives.

Samantha then logs off, since her jet's autopilot slowed down to be refueled while in midair, and she's going to try to use that as a means of escape. She also livestreams the attempt to them, which I'm sure wouldn't backfire at all even though you just said you should assume Anorak would be spying on everything you do.

So our heroes watch as she puts on a parachute and opens the jet's emergency exit.

Faisal and Shoto burst into applause. I joined in, trying to ignore my fear. Was outsmarting Anorak really going to be so easy?

I'm going to guess no, because everything about the past two chapters tells me Anorak is going to be the kind of boring invincible villain I ranted about about five years ago. Specifically, Anorak takes control of the plane and tries to ram Samantha. Is that the kind of control a plane would actually have? I don't know, and honestly don't have the energy to figure out.

She still manages to escape by cutting out her main parachute, and lands somewhere east of downtown Columbus. And then Anorak tries to crash the plane on top of her.

But as the jet was about to crash, it pulled up sharply, so instead of hitting her landing site dead-on it made impact a few hundred feet away, in the middle of a deserted picnic area.

Okay. Sure. I imagine this will be explained at some point, but since the book isn't trying to give me a mystery that can be solved, I'm not going to break a sweat trying to solve it.

If it sounds like a fun, heart-pumping action sequence, let me clarify that this took two pages. Both ramming attempts were a threat for a paragraph each.

Anyway, the plane goes up in flames, and since it just got refueled, that makes for a lot of burning fuel being flung around, which means even if Samantha survived the crash and explosion, she's probably still in major trouble. Probably. I'd say it's unlikely for her to die off-screen in such an ambiguous fashion, but then again, Daito died off-screen in the previous book and Wade has a new love interest, so, who knows. Though I'll still work on the assumption that she's alive until proven otherwise.

And that's the end of this chapter. Yes, really, we're gonna make a cliffhanger out of that. And also no progress has been made towards advancing the plot, at least on Wade's end.

[mdhwrites]

Amphibia Meeting the Human Realm is My Favorite Half Season of the Show So Far

And it's because it managed to push into new territory that expanded its themes harder through contrast and parallels, never forgot its stakes while keeping its identity, and yet still managed to give us a new vibrant cast of supporting characters so as to bring together an exceedingly satisfying half season. Not a perfect one but one that never quite felt as awkward as the low points of other seasons and is DRIPPING with good characterization, morals, ideas, etc.

One of the big things I think a lot of fans of the series miss by calling it filler, the same fans who I assume likely skipped S1 because they saw it as filler, is actually the importance of swinging back around to S1's concepts but with the Plantars. We get to see the changes to how things go because of how much Anne has changed, how much Anne has affected the Plantars but also how little Anne has changed. It makes it so that while we do keep getting told Anne is more responsible, we can see it more clearly than during any other part of the series.

But we can also see the seeds being set for why the ending will be what it will be (because there's no way I don't know how the series ends). Both Sprig's Birthday and You Give a Frog a Cookie show that while Anne is doing it for better people... She's still a people pleaser to her friends. She still has growth she needs to do. Growth that might require some amount of time away from those she's closest to to achieve because she needs time to invest in herself.

Not to say the half season is perfect. I can see a lot of reasons why some dislike Spider-Sprig even if I like the segment, Thai Feud has good character reasoning behind it even if I think it goes beyond just childish selfishness which is the saving grace for Anne during a lot of S1 and Hollywood Hop Pop is a good use of the fact that Anne lives in Los Angeles but it still doesn't change that it's awkward and clunky in the same ways that some Hop Pop focused episodes tend to be when he needs to act like an idiot. All three of these though have reasonable justifications, good lessons, are trying to put closure to things or say something about the characters... There's a point to all of them existing, regardless of if they're executed on the best. And even at its worst execution, each one probably still has at least one heartwarming moment and/or one real good joke, like Sprig breaking down about getting yelled at.

And that's one thing I do ADORE: Amphibia is still Amphibia. Despite True Colors, it did not abandon its own identity. It's still funny and over the top and kind of crazy and it's willing to let the human realm be its own sort of crazy to reflect that. I don't think people are right in saying it just forgot about True Colors though. Even while keeping this identity, you have them worrying about getting caught, Anne working herself to death, the weight of lies, etc. like that. It backs off a bit in the second half of the mid-season but only once it has gotten Anne and others to a healthier mindset and even then, no one except whoever is fucking up in a given episode is entirely forgetting what the final goal is. Hell, anyone who claims the show just forgets about True Colors isn't recognizing that this thirteen year old, multiple times, overloads herself by trying to trivialize all that happened. Anne's whole scope of conflict she's EVER been a part of increased a hundred times fold over the course of a single day so her not directly addressing it besides the one part she actually can do something about is GREAT. All the rest of the whispers are part of what's torturing her until finally she knows progress is being made by people like Doctor Jan and she starts breathing again once she tells herself she can trust others with the problem.

It's just... REALLY FUCKING GOOD. And that's without getting into the fact that despite most of the side characters like the IT Girls and Doctor Jan only actually getting like two minutes of screen time each before the last two episodes, they are wonderful additions to the cast and work great. Oum and Bee, Anne's parents, are the only real protagonist additions and the closest they get to a dedicated episode is when Anne goes to the movies. Otherwise, they're always supporting characters to the character drama or themes going on with Anne and the Plantars. And anyone who claims the Plantars are not main characters WILL BE BONKED. Sprig is literally the secondary main character people.

For new antagonists, we have Cloakbot who is a great way to introduce a new threat that goes well with the early focus of trying to adapt and hide on Earth like the Plantars are before then swapping to Mr. X who is SO full of personality and does well to prod the cast forward as they think they're ready to settle in for however long this takes. Cloakbot actually takes up way more time than Mr. X though as Mr. X only shows up like three times before the final episode and while he is the primary threat in each, he's not nearly as involved as Cloakbot was during their appearance. It serves well to build up Mr. X though before finally we see the FBI triumphant... Briefly. But triumphant nonetheless.

The last thing I'll touch on is Sasha and Marcy. Marcy... Marcy is the one part of the half season where I suspect rewatching makes it worse. Knowing this is effectively the final outing for Marcy and even Olivia and Yunan are treating her as just a brain and less as a character (I'm sorry but Marcy really doesn't have a found family) is ROUGH. Marcy has always been only kind of half a character with how she's written though and if I have one big complaint of Amphibia as a whole/so far, it's that Marcy so obviously is tailored for plot purposes more than she is to actually be a part of the show. The episode itself is enjoyable, the two newts have a GREAT dynamic and it sets up the terrifying might of Andrias and what is to come well but... It still is a real shame for the character.

Sasha on the other hand is great, as she commonly is. She genuinely has to ask if she is a conqueror or a protector. She has always seen herself as on the side of right after all. That she controls others for the sake of protecting them. It's part of why Reunion is so effective. Getting to see her at her lowest cause her to decide that and how it inspires Grime is great. Also seeing another big city slicker underestimating the townies and their capabilities is great, not only just a nice hurrah for anyone who loves Wartwood but a nice reminder of why Anne has so much adjusting to do because she underestimated all of this so much. It sets her up VERY well for what will make up the bulk of S3B, at least from my understanding.

So yeah, Amphibia keeps being fucking amazing and yet I STILL have hot takes that go against the opinions of the fandom. Go figure. XD

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I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

And finally a Twitter you can follow too!

[whydoeseverythinghurt]

Someone tell me Lower Decks gets better

Edit: So I am hearing good things from very angry people, and I think that means that it’s fine.

I know that a lot of people like Lower Decks, and I think in isolation, I would be one of them, but this is supposed to be Star Trek, right? I like Rick and Morty’s particular brand cynicism, and hopelessness, and I know a lot of the people working on Lower Decks come from there, but that just isn’t Star Trek.

Disclaimer: I only saw the first episode, so most of this can be discounted if that isn’t an accurate depiction of the show as a whole.

Star Trek started off as a ‘perfect’ utopian future, that was about what its creators thought we should aspire to. But from the get go we are shown that there are many issues with it, and that it is a utopia because someone is always fighting against the bad actors, working to improve life, and deal with all those issues. Star Trek is about reform from the inside.

Kirk and Spock both think the Admiralty, the Starfleet Code of Conduct and even the Prime Directive are needlessly restrictive, so what do they do? They find loopholes.

Spock tells Commodore Decker that he won’t stand for the endangerment of the crew, and if he wants to call it mutiny he can do so the second they get back to civilization, where Spock will be allowed to plead his case. Kirk is told that all the Court Martial business can be swept under the rug if he’s willing to give up his pride, and he says no. He forces them to have to go through the process, so that he can plead his case, but also to demonstrate that the system should work, it shouldn’t ignore issues.

Picard and River find out that the Admiralty are being controlled by worms, and take it upon themselves to stop the damage that they are doing. (Such a Star Trek sentence, I know.)

Deep Space Nine as it progresses makes the show about how the ‘utopia’ is based on colonialist ideals, and leaves behind the most vulnerable in society. In the beginning this is done with the justification that if they help the people suffering and being discriminated against, then they may lose a potential ally, or gain an enemy. The government decides that it isn’t worth the risk, and let’s people suffer.

But Deep Space Nine is not just as amazing as it is because of the Holocaust metaphors, its also because it pushes at the moral fabric of the Federation. It asks the question “What happens when push comes to shove, and your perfect society descends into war?” And it shows the fallout, and it shows the toll on people’s lives, and it shows that even when you aren’t living in a perpetual state of war it’s very difficult to go back.

Voyager asks “What happens when no one is looking? What happens when all you have are your ideals and morals that come from a society you are no longer attached to (that we as the audience know, no longer exists)? Do you sacrifice your morals so that you can get back to your utopia? In fact, do you sacrifice your ideals for your utopia as a whole. Or would sacrificing them make it something other than a utopia?”

Haven’t seen all of them yet, so: Discovery says “What happens when you make the wrong moral judgment (or depending on interpretation, the right one, but no one allows you to go far enough)? What happens when you are the scapegoat that they blame an entire war, on? Even one that has brewing since before you were born. What do you do when they place the blame squarely on your shoulders, and solely at your feet? What do you do when the one person who gave you a chance to prove yourself turned out to be lying the entire time, and actually wanted you to be what everyone else thought you were? 

“What do you do afterwards? How you trust someone again after that kind of betrayal? What do you do when some goodie two shoes, who has never seen the horror that you have, comes waltzing in and trying to apply their morals to your life? How could they possibly win your trust?” That one gets a definitive answer, they show their convictions, even when no one is watching, they say, “we have to do the right thing.”

It goes on to ask several others, (from what I know) which are in some ways similar to later seasons of Deep Space Nine, “What do you do when the utopia you loved and fought and bled, and that people died for, is gone? How willing are you to fight to get it back?”

Lower Decks introduces a character who sees the moral failings of Starfleet, shows them to other people and then encourages them to give up, and not try to make the situation better. They have influence, and could easily seize power, but what do they do? Nothing. They watch as people who should not be in charge remain in power and do nothing about it, and discourage anyone who wants to try. They don’t want things to be different, they want to rebel against their parents. And that’s it, not corrupt institutions, not bad protocols, or worse people in charge. They want their parents to notice them.

That is not Star Trek. Star Trek is about hope in the most dire of circumstances. It’s about persevering and going against the odds, even when you know you’re probably going to die anyway, but you still have to try. 

It is about not just fighting for yourself, but for your family, your people, your crew, caring about the faceless and the nameless, the ‘lesser’, those that cannot fight for themselves. Standing up to and against the institutions which did the wrong thing, which did not protect the people they should have. (The waters get muddy with the different framings of the maquis, but you are meant to be sympathetic to their ideas, and morals, if nothing else.)

Nihilism has its place in Star Trek, (a cynical outlook can be seen as one of the most common character traits across series.) Existential dread has its place too, but it has to be tempered with that hope. And that hope isn’t unwavering, in fact most characters at one point or another lose it, briefly or for longer periods of time, but in those moments they rely on those around them to keep the faith. They continually pass the torch of whose responsibility it is. One of the most important things is that there is always someone who has hope. 

And I would probably like Lower Decks if it seemed at all willing to explore the idea, “Well, what do you do when hope is completely lost? What do you do what there is no one left? And the thing you love is a shell of either what it used to be, or what it aspired to?”

Instead, all that is left of a green character who has never encountered that adversity and has their ideals forcefully beaten out of them. The central authority in their life tells them how they are wrong to cling to them (and then that person is demonstrated to be right.) I would be interesting to see the story if they wished to explore a slow dawning realization that hope is really lost, or even asked, “What do you do when there is nothing to hope for? And no one left to have that hope?”

To me it seems like they heard about Star Trek from parodies, and wanted to make jokes, so they set its central themes on fire, and then didn’t want to explore the implications. Just play in its dead carcass, and don’t you dare think about what it once was.

I know that Enterprise had its issues, but most people say that it improved greatly with the last season (besides the last episode), and say that it could have done more and been better if the network would have just kept it around a bit longer. People have their criticisms of Discovery and Picard, but I get the impression that they truly are labors of love.

Lower Decks gives me the feeling that it is just a blatant cash grab made by people who didn’t know, or understand the property and just had to do something with it. I know that their is diversity in the series, but I wish that I could say definitively that that the woman in the burka was actually meant to show the same sentiments as Chekhov in the Original Series. (As I remember seeing someone suggest as a viable option for how the New movies could handle Anton Yelchin’s death.) My thoughts right now is that it’s just an attitude of “Well, Star Trek is about diversity in thought, culture, and race, so we should make the characters diverse, because it’s a utopian future, right?” With no intention to to continue the way of dealing with current issues through allegory.

I hope I’m wrong. As far as I know it is a good show, but right now I don’t think it’s a good Star Trek one. 

(Although again take that with a grain of salt, because I have seen so little, and I didn’t particularly like the Orville, or what I’ve seen of it. Mostly, because it felt clunky, unnatural, boring and like they took half remembered plot points/storylines and placed new characters into them. The heart was there, but the thought didn’t seem to be.)

Tl;dr: Can someone tell me if Lower Decks has the characters fight back against Starfleet, or the bad elements in it? Or even if it explores why that isn’t an option? Why they have lost all hope?

[self-loving-vampire]

Ultima VII: The Black Gate (1992)

Ultima 7 was pretty much my introduction to RPGs, and I could not have asked for a better pair of games to ignite a lifelong passion into that genre. There is a real reason why this is still considered one of the best RPGs ever made.

While Ultima 7 is often discussed as a singular entity, it is actually two separate full-length games with one expansion each. For this post I will focus on the first one, Ultima VII: The Black Gate, as well as its expansion: Forge of Virtue.

I recommend playing the game using Exult, which adds some quality of life features (such as a feeding hotkey and a “use all keys” hotkey) as well as the option to use higher quality audio packs, implement bug fixes, and change the font into something easier on the eyes.

Summary

The protagonist of the Ultima series is “the Avatar”, a blank slate isekai protagonist from our world who has previously travelled to the world of Britannia several times and saved it from many threats, also becoming the shining paragon of the virtues meant to guide its people.

In this game, you once again cross the portal to Britannia to save it from a new and mysterious extradimensional threat. As soon as you arrive, you immediately discover two things:

1- A violent ritualistic murder has just taken place.

2- There is suspicious new organization called “The Fellowship” gaining adherents throughout the land.

It is up to you to investigate these developments.

Freedom

In terms of freedom, the Black Gate has plenty overall but there are areas where it is not quite there.

Once you can manage to get the password to get out of the locked-down town of Trinsic you are free to go nearly anywhere in the game right away and have multiple means of transportation to accomplish this, such as moongates or ships.

And there are some very real rewards to exploring like this as well, such as various treasure caches and other interesting findings. 

The world is actually very small by modern standards, especially when settlements occupy so much of it, but both the towns and the wilderness areas are dense with content.

Notably, the game also allows you to perform various activities. From stealing to making a honest living by baking bread (which is something you can do thanks to how interactive the environment is) or gathering eggs at a farm.

Where it falls short is in terms of having multiple possible solutions for quests. Generally there is only one correct option for how to complete them.

That said, there is a bad ending you might be able to find in addition to the canonical good ending.

Character Creation/Customization

This is one of the big minuses of the game. While you can select your name and gender (and with Exult also have a wider selection of portraits) that is about it for character creation.

All characters will start with the same stats and there are no character classes. You can develop your stats through training and specialize through your choice of equipment, but by the end of the Forge of Virtue expansion you will have maxed stats and the best weapon in the game (a sword) regardless, and you will definitely need to cast a few spells to progress the main quest as well.

This can make every playthrough feel much like the last, as there isn’t that much of a way to vary how your character develops or what abilities they’ll end up having. You will always be a master of absolutely everything in the end unless you go out of your way to avoid doing the Forge of Virtue expansion.

Story/Setting

While the game is a bit too obvious and heavy-handed about its villains, there are still many interesting storylines in the game that deal with mature subjects that remain relevant today, such as cults, drug abuse, workplace exploitation, and xenophobia.

However, the setting as a whole is greater than any individual storyline taking place within. With the exception of most guards and bandits, every single NPC in the game is an individual with a name, schedule, living space, and defined personality. This was not the norm in 1992 and even today there’s not many games that really implement this well. The world is also very detailed in terms of things like the services available to you, the general interactivity of the game world, and the sheer amount of things that populate every corner of it.

The initial murder is not only a strong hook for investigation but also a shocking scene in its own right. The Guardian also proves to have a significant presence as a villain, using a mental link to remotely taunt you based on the context of what is happening. For example, if your companions die he may offer you some exaggerated, mocking pity.

Immersion

There is something very interesting and comfortable about just watching the various inhabitants of a town just go about their daily lives. They work during the day, eat at certain times (either at home or at one of the many taverns in the land), and sleep at night. They don’t just strangely repeat one single action during the day either, they may do things like open windows when the weather is nice or turn candles and streetlamps on at night.

In terms of immersion, Ultima 7 is my primary example of a game that does an excellent job of it even if there’s some weirdness going on with the setting. Even after having played so many more games throughout my life, only a few are on the same level as either part of Ultima 7 when it comes to immersion.

Gameplay

There are three broad aspects to the gameplay here that I want to discuss.

The first is combat. It is actually simple enough that you can call it almost entirely automatic. You simply enable combat mode by pressing C and your party will automatically go and fight nearby hostile enemies based on whatever combat orders you have selected for them (by default, attacking the closest enemy).

This is certainly better than having an outright bad or annoying combat system as the whole process is simple and painless, but I still wish there was more depth to it. Your stats, and especially your equipment, still play a role but other than things like pausing to use items or cast spells the whole process is very uninvolved.

I kind of wish there was more depth to it, but at least the other two areas of the gameplay are reasonably good.

The next aspect of gameplay is dialogue, which uses dialogue trees for the first time in the series. Previously, it required typing in keywords, which are retained but as dialogue options you can just click on rather than remember and type.

While the keywords are not really written as natural language most of the time (requiring some imagination to determine the specifics of your dialogue), the system is very easy to use regardless. It definitely lacks depth compared to something like Fallout: New Vegas, but so do most games.

The third and most notable thing is the way you interact with the world in general. It is both extremely simple and very immersive at the same time.

Ultima 7 is a game that can be played entirely with the mouse (though keyboard hotkeys make everything much more comfortable). You can right click a space to walk there, you can left click something to identify what it is, and you can use double left click to interact.

For example, double left click over an NPC to talk to them (or attack them, if combat mode is enabled), double left click a door to open it, double left click a loaf of bread to feed it to someone, and so on.

But there is more. By holding your click over an item and dragging it, you can move it. This has various applications beyond just being how you pick things up and add them to your inventory. For example, sometimes objects may be hidden beneath other objects, or objects may need to be placed in a specific location.

There are some downsides to this system. Particularly, the issue that keeping your inventory organized can be time-consuming when it has to be done by manually dragging objects around, and this can also make looting relatively slow.

Despite this, I think this kind of interaction system has a lot of potential. It just has some clunky aspects to be ironed out.

Aesthetics

Ultima 7 was very good-looking for its time, and although modern players will not be very impressed by how it looks or sounds, it still remains easily legible in a way that some other old games are not. That, and the ability to identify anything with just a left click, makes this a very easy game to make out at the very least.

Some of the music of this game is very distinctive too, and will likely stay with you after a full playthrough.

In terms of style, the Black Gate does have a bit of an identity while still having a very familiar medieval fantasy setting with things like trolls, animated skeletons, dragons, and liches. While there are aspects that help the setting distinguish itself a bit, they are relatively subtle.

If I had to describe the feeling of playing this, I’d call it “open and laid back”. While the main quest deals with a looming threat to the entire world, the game does not follow this overly closely at first, letting you deal with it at your own pace and without having your exploration options limited by the story.

In fact, when I was young I often just ignored that and went to live in a creepy ruin in the swamp.

(Don’t expect many pictures in these reviews, but have one of my “childhood home.”)

I’d say that Ultima 7′s second part (Serpent Isle) has a much stronger and also darker and more isolating atmosphere overall and that has a lot of appeal to me in particular, but the Black Gate is definitely more open and less linear, and I also appreciate that.

Accessibility

It pleases me to say that Ultima 7 remains extremely easy to pick up and play. Even setting up Exult is not complicated in the least.

The gameplay is intuitive and simple, the UI is minimal, stats are basic (and not even that important), and the combat is automatic. I expect that this is not only the easiest point of entry into the Ultima series as a whole but also likely even easier to get into than many modern RPGs!

It does have some aspects that may be a bit clunky, like all the inventory-related dragging, but it’s definitely not obscure or complicated even to someone who has not read the manual (though I’d still recommend doing that). I literally played this game as a tiny child who could barely read or understand English and still got really into it.

The one thing I’d like to point out is that the game uses a type of copy protection where at a couple of story points (including an extremely early one to leave the first town) you will be asked some questions that require using the manual and external map to answer. You can just google the answers for these.

Conclusion

As I write more of these reviews there will be many games that are interesting, but deeply flawed. Games that are worth trying out but maybe not finishing, as well as games that had interesting ideas but that I can’t entirely recommend due to serious problems that will easily put people off.

But I do not think the Black Gate is such a game. I can easily recommend it with no qualifiers despite the fact that it is almost 30 years old. This is really a game that all RPG fans should at the very least try for a few hours, and not only for its historical significance. It is genuinely a good game worthy of its praise.

I will review its sequel, Ultima VII Part 2: Serpent Isle, next.

[nerdy-bits]

The Unspoken Rules of Stealth Games

I love stealth games. They are my absolute jam. I’ve been an Assassin’s Creed acolyte from the beginning and Splinter Cell rests firmly atop my list of favorite franchises. The industry isn’t flooded by this genre, but there are a fair number of quality contenders. The Dishonored games are a tour de force, I love the critically mixed Deus Ex prequels deeply, I only play Far Cry with my knife and bow, Ghost Recon is a kind of comfort food, even in Uncharted 4 I avoided combat in favor of being a sneak. In fact, really the only thing I like more than stealth gameplay is cooperative stealth gameplay (though I am a sucker for tactics games). There is just something about clearing a room with a friend, no enemy wise to your presence. Splinter Cell has brilliant co-op. Far Cry is at its best when your crew chooses the silent approach, one friend getting dirty up close with a blade while a ranger picks off sentries, putting arrows between armor plates. 

Most stealth games though, avoid multiplayer completely. I frequently lament that I can’t take out targets as agents 47 and 46. Most of these games, to me, feel like they would be better with a friend. Now a part of that is certainly because most things are better with friends but, secondarily, these games are difficult. Having a friend to help could both ease the game of chess you play in every encounter or allow creators to add differing levels of complexity. 

I could talk about the possibilities for, maybe literally, days. But that’s not what I’m here to talk about. At least not today. If very few stealth franchises build out co-op experiences, a fraction of those games create adversarial multiplayer. Splinter Cell has tried it. Spies vs Mercs, a mode that pitches Splinter Cell agents against NPC-esque mercenaries, leverages darkness and verticality against mercs with flashlights. It’s, as I previously described, brilliant. By pitting factions against each other with different abilities to navigate the gamespace, adhering to the stealth game loop is the only thing that gives the spies an advantage. 

Assassin’s Creed also dabbled in multiplayer. Both PvP and PvE. The latter, while promising, fell victim to the extremely buggy launch of Assassin’s Creed Unity. Network issues, net code issues, strange pop-in, the experience was fractured from the start. The former, PvP variant, was introduced with the release of AC Brotherhood. Across a handful of game modes, and choosing between an impressive lineup of characters, players hunted each other down across crowded maps utilizing a number of distractive, offensive, and defensive abilities. 

The Brotherhood multiplayer was great in the first few weeks, but as time progressed players became savvy to the underlying systems and within months of release the idea of “Stealth” all but disappeared. The reasons, I believe, are perhaps why so many stealth games leave this feature off of the list: Balance and participation.

A few weeks ago Hood: Outlaws and Legends came out and a group of friends and I grabbed it up. At only thirty dollars it was kinda hard not to just grab it and give it a shot. Hood takes place in the Robin Hood universe (mythos?) and tasks players to cooperatively - stealthily - infiltrate an area, track down the Sheriff, pickpocket a vault key from him, and then abscond with the loot in said vault. It’s like Payday with a bow and arrow. 

Pulling off these heists is actually pretty fun. The PvE (versus AI only) mode allows you to dig into the mechanics of the game while working out the kinks in your team communication. Before long we were complimenting well placed shots and perfect dual takedowns as we carved our way to our prize. The formula is solid, if a bit repetitious. The requirements don’t change at all between maps. The location of the vault chest will move around from heist to heist, but that is really it; and after a few rounds we had grown a bit too familiar with the process. The game also randomly chooses the maps in this mode, so we ended up playing two maps in three games, which was a bit of a bummer. Also your XP gain is dramatically limited in this AI centered mode, which pushed us quickly into the game’s core mode: heists against competing human players.

The formula doesn’t really change for this PvPvE mode, save the fact that at the same time you are hunting for the Sheriff, his key, and then the vault, another team is as well. Initially the prospect of this dynamic was interesting, but pretty quickly it devolved.

This was when I realized multiplayer stealth is critically dependent on its players participating in the right way. Now some games incentivize this participation or choose to restrict your abilities altogether. Think AC: Brotherhoods scoring system for kills which took points from you for being loud or conspicuous. Spies vs Mercs restricts teams abilities based on their faction. Mercs literally cannot hide in the dark. Spies will not win a gunfight. 

Hood doesn’t really build any advantage or disadvantages into its gameplay loop. We started our first round of PvPvE and began to sneak around the map the same way we were in the PvE mode. Being seen by guards locks the area you are in down. They close all the gates and begin hunting for you. Against AI this was a paradigm shift. The whole group has to go into ghost mode or just shelter in place until the heightened awareness drips away with the invisible clock. In multiplayer you get notified if your opponents incur a lockdown. This is done presumably to give you a brief jolt of encouragement. Thoughts dart across your mind, “They are locked down, they got caught, we have a few minutes to creep ahead and really gain an advantage. 

Only that wasn’t the case. 

Ryan and I stopped playing the Brotherhood multiplayer a few months in. It was nearly impossible to play the game by its own rules. Shooting a target with your wrist mounted pistol was always the worst way to pull off a kill, but useful if your target just kept evading you. You received a meager serving of points and would move back into the crowd in an attempt to reestablish yourself as an agent of stealth. By the end of the first month people were sprinting across rooftops, shooting down into the crowd, and then running off to do it again. They had discovered that if you ran around on the rooftops it didn’t raise your profile and that picking off a target from a rooftop with a gun, the penalty wouldn’t be enforced unless you killed a second target. First kills in this method would rack around 1800 points, the second kill a measly 300 (the numbers may be way off here, its been years. It’s the proportion that’s important. 

The second kill was the system working, discouraging loud tactics with point penalties. But if you went and hid, let the system time out, and then did it again, you could farm high point value kills in perhaps the least clandestine way possible. Brotherhood became a shooting gallery. It was absolutely untenable. Assassin’s Creed would get away from adversarial multiplayer after Black Flag. I barely returned for Revelations. 

As we were creeping through the bushes in a castle courtyard, our band of merry thieves, we got the first notification that our opponents had triggered an alarm. A wave of relief hit the crew. We’ve got some time. Then the second notification came, then the third, then a fourth. Our relief was subsumed by a revelation: they are just ignoring the stealth altogether. What followed was a painfully reminiscent race to the objectives ignoring area guards altogether (If a gate got dropped each team had a character that could just lift the gate). Our opponents got the key first, found the vault first, and moved the prize first. Each time we got close we were either picked off by a camping Robin, thatching us through the reeds with pinpoint accuracy, or we got bodied by the two melee characters Tooke and John.

Dying, spawning, and running back to the objective is a drag in any game. In a game where you have to make a getaway, every second you have to run back to the last place you saw the objective is a second of distance they get to make. Combat felt clunky and secondary to a stealth system that had been completely abandoned. Knowing that your opponent trips an alarm is incredibly useful, but knowing when they got the key, that they had found the vault, and having a tracker for how far the chest was moving was a bit much. I kept thinking about how much cooler it would have been if we had found the Sheriff only to discover the key was already gone. Imagine coming across a vault that had been looted already, your team scrambling desperately to find out how far their opponents had gotten. 

Still, none of this works players don’t abide by an invisible set of rules, therefore relying on those rules just ends up feeling like a mistake. A private lobby with eight people, all who agree to be stealthy is one thing, hoping that the community at large adopts that mindset is, ever more clearly, dependent on systems. The question is, in an industry that builds to player’s fantasies of power, how do you implement these systems and simultaneously empower players while also guiding their play-style along the path you desire?

How do you penalize running around like Rambo adequately? How do you incentivize stealth to make it the only way players want to engage?

@LubWub ~Caleb