#this is quite possibly the dumbest thing i've done

[miserablejester]

Cunk on Magic pt. 1/?

[zalrb]

the summer i turned pretty 2x04 review

Honestly, for someone who is meant to push people away and not tell anyone what he's dealing with, Conrad is pretty open about the stuff he's going through. He straight up tells Belly's brother he's having a panic attack and what he can do to help instead of just yelling at him to go the fuck away or something. Idk man.

"Talk about anything" launches into a speech about the beach and how Conrad is the coolest person in the world. The funniest thing about things like this is dialogue about "inconsequential" things would make their bond seem more realistic instead of pointed talks about memories and how cool the other person is. One of the reasons why the gang in T70s works is because they just talk about dumb shit together

"He's grown into quite the asshole" I mean has he, Skye? Your mother is being unnecessarily hostile about the whole thing, it seems like he's just matching her energy idk.

Like this isn't even me being team Conrad or anything because I don't care about him but he hasn't DONE anything for the way everyone talks about him.

Like he's isn't warm when she talks to him in his room but his energy is different because Julia's energy is different.

Jfc they're really trying to make me believe that Taylor and brother dude like each other with how they antagonize each other but this is as performative as Belly trying to be twirly and giddy around Conrad.

Steven. I'm not going to remember that.

"Let's do some drills down by the beach, volleyball camp is in five days." "I haven't touched a ball in months" isn't that why you do the drills, Belly?

"It was hard enough for me to get this one" *laughs* Why is that funny?

Belly actress does the Katie Holmes shrug. It was annoying then, it's annoying now.

"Well we're your family too" even though I kissed you then your brother then made the wake about me because Conrad lay his head on his ex-girlfriend's lap and I admittedly forgot to check up on you when Susannah died because I was too busy focusing on Conrad which consisted of me telling him to stop being sad at prom and then breaking up with him.

The only time Conrad's lack of a facial expression has worked is him looking at Belly when she's all "the magical sea breeze will cool you down"and his face is like that the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

Did Belly tell Conrad her plan of schmoozing Skye and I just forgot it because it's very possible, I'm barely paying attention but if she hadn't, maybe she could. Or is this supposed to show how Belly and Jere are best friends now.

Skye doesn't come across as an introvert, they just come across as kind of an ass. "I don't smile, I don't high five, the corners of my mouth might turn up but I WILL NOT SMILE" we get it, you're cool.

No one on this show is likeable.

Them getting ready to play laser tag is literally the ONLY TIME they seem like friends.

I mean, we had pizza for *Christmas* dinner. OH THE HORROR.

Are whaling boats fancy?

I don't need to see this rock climbing scene. Next.

How many Taylor Swift songs do we NEED in a show. I understand I'm the only one who thinks this.

"It was supremely satisfying watching you wipe the floor with Conrad after everything he put you through" YOU MEAN BEING SAD??

"You used to cry every time you looked at the Tower of Terror" yeah but he's, like, seventeen now, Belly.

"He made it so hard not to love him." I MEAN HOW? BECAUSE HE SPOKE? Jesus Christ.

"Used to love him, I mean" JERE HAS ENTERED THE CHAT. I would appreciate this more if it was fun messy.

LMAO so when Jere is like "And what's the key to making me happy, Belly?" I was like oh OK because there was like a hint of innuendo in his voice, completely unintentional I think, but it was a bit like ooh, I hear that and then it was ENTIRELY ruined when she's like "correcting people who say bru-chetta" and he laughs and goes "Because it's bru-sketta!" and it was SUCH a corny delivery.

Skipping everything with the mom because I do not care.

So who's going to have a breakdown at the end of this episode?

"You're one of the most interesting people I've ever met" I'm laughing because the delivery came across as unintentionally sarcastic.

"Jeremiah is always there when I need him" it's a RIDE. I also love when she flashes back to him always being there for her the first instance is his mother telling him to stay inside with her because she's got a summer cold and him being like "MOM" and her being like "PLEASE" and him being like fine. Like that's not what you think that is. He should hang out with her and then be asked to go to the boardwalk and being like nah I think I'll just stay in with Belly. HOW IS THAT NOT OBVIOUS?

"And when he got sick two days later, I stayed home with him" so then wouldn't you two just be passing the cold back and forth to each other?

Ohhhhh they're looking at each other on this ride and she's feeling how much she likes him! and needs him! and they have NO chemistry!

"It feels weird having fun, like part of me feels guilty" if you were a good actress we would see that conflict in you the entire day but whatever, the show is really bad with showcasing how much Susannah's death is supposed to affect her.

Oh no breakdowns because that would require drama. Just the empty beach house which I know is meant to be a MOMENT but it isn't.

[franstastic-ideas]

Can I have the entire 50 character ask thing for your favorite sisterhood girl pls I like hearing about them

Ohhhh, don't make me CHOOSE!

I know I've already spoken quite a bit about Akari, but maybe I still haven't enough!

1. Canon I outright reject

Her being fifteen.

Akari's age should be up to interpretation, and I say this is a 21-22 year old woman who happens to be short.

2. A canon or headcanon hill I will die on

Hikari and Akari are one and the same, not separate people with an uncanny resemblance to one another.

3. Obscure headcanon

She has a deep, lovely, womanly voice...

Akari doesn't quite laugh out loud, so much as give a soft, breathy chuckle or snicker. But, if and whenever she does laugh, it sounds like the crowing of a Murkrow.

4. Favorite line

Not exactly my favorite, but it's the funniest in and out of context:

*said in the calmest of tones and with the most serene of smiles*

"Thorton, would you kindly shut your mouth?"

5. Best personality trait

She's extremely perseverant. She would have to be to have endured as much as she has in Hisui, as well as be perceived as a near unstoppable force by the general public.

6. Worst personality trait

Akari is extremely guarded about her softer emotions and can come off as cold because of that.

Due to her ambivalent sentiments towards the possibility of entering a romantic relationship, she either ignores the affection given to her by an admirer or will play the oblivious game for as long as possible (when she's not, you know, actually being oblivious).

7. Age/height/weight headcanon

As stated above, she is a 21-22 year old woman to me who just happens to be short - perhaps 5 ft. 2 in.

As for her weight... she's lost quite a bit since her arrival in Hisui.

8. Unpopular opinion about them

I'm personally not at all fond of her being characterized as this innocent, naive little creature that Volo takes great and perverse pleasure in manipulating and betraying.

9. Scene that first made me love (or hate) the character

Her mere existence was enough for me to love her.

But Akari possibly being the only protagonist to have embarked on a second adventure depending on personal interpretation definitely caught my interest.

10. Best moment on screen (or in the book)

When she calmly asserts herself against Kamado during the trial that will decide Volo's fate.

No matter how much Kamado raises his voice arguing that he can no longer be trusted to keep his word and needs to be punished severely for his actions, Akari responds to him with a calculating coolness.

11. Faceclaim for the role

Akari has a design already, so I'll share my voice claim for her instead: Kikyo (Willow Johnson) from Inuyasha.

12. Crack headcanon

Akari won't allow herself to show any weakness - but thinking about Wheatley, her Rotom back in Sinnoh, reduces her to such a visibly miserable state, always letting out a deep sigh before saying:

"I miss my Rotom, (name). I miss him so much..."

13. Dumbest thing they’ve ever done

Actually considering for all of a moment eating the only-Arceus-knows-how-outdated Old Gateau she found in the Old Chateau.

14. Most heroic moment

Ask anyone in Hisui and they'll tell you it's when she survived her banishment and managed to quell Origin Forme Palkia's frenzy, thereby saving the entire world.

And then after that, taking down a deranged Volo on Mount Coronet's peak along with none other than The Renegade, a Legendary Pokémon created by almighty Sinnoh/Arceus with a history so violent that it warranted what was intended to be eternal banishment to The Distortion World.

15. Worst thing they’ve ever done

Akari turning her back on Volo after he lowered himself to his hands and knees begging for her forgiveness.

It's something she almost immediately began to regret. That desperate, tearful expression of his wouldn't leave her mind.

16. Deepest darkest secret they won’t even admit to themselves

She truly does want someone to love her. A man that will love her and only her to the point of obsession.

17. Quotes, songs, poems, etc. that I associate with them

Golden Afternoon by Circus-P.

"I'm invincible To all the rage, the hate, the pain of fate I am vulnerable To all my rage, my hate, the pace at which I change"

18. What they’d go to see a therapist about

Every single hardship she experienced in Hisui honestly warrants therapy, but she has too much pride to ever even momentarily consider attending a session.

19. Vices/bad habits

Akari tends to treat others in a similar manner to how she is treated. She won't stoop to pettiness or cruelty, but she will behave more coldly towards those who have wronged her.

20. Scars

Emotionally, her father abandoning her she was still small. He said being a married man with a child wasn't what he wanted out of life after all, so he left Twinleaf Town and never looked back.

Her mother fiercely believed that he would return, but once the realization he wouldn't finally struck her, Ayako stopped speaking for a while and accidentally neglected Hikari. Jun was Hikari's source of sunshine during this time.

Physically, I sometimes imagine she has a small to medium X-shaped scar on her chest from her battle with Lord Kleavor, and a few burns from the one with Lord Arcanine.

21. Drink of choice (not just alcoholic)

Berry Juice, or Razz Berry Tea

22. Best physical feature

Her long, flowing, slate-colored hair has caught the eye of several.

23. If they were a scented candle, what would they smell like?

Lemon and Lavender~

24. Most annoying habit

She tends to intimidate others with her silvery gaze, something that more often than not isn't intentional.

25. 3 things they’d want to take with them if they were dropped off in the middle of nowhere

Considering Akari did get dropped in the middle of nowhere, nowhere being Hisui, there are a few things she would have liked to have brought with her: her previous team members, but there are six of them rather than three.

26. What they would do if stuck in an elevator with [insert character of your choice from the same fandom]

If she and Volo were trapped in an elevator, there are two drastically different outcomes that may occur:

Volo will try to take this opportunity, since it seems they're going to be in here for a little while, to get some smooching done - since people keep giving them less than appreciative stares when they do so in public.

Or, in the event that Volo doesn't know how elevators really work, despite his best efforts, he almost immediately spirals into a panic and begins blaming himself for this event - because surely this is Arceus punishing him for his past sins and she just happened to get caught in the crossfire.

27. Their guilty pleasure

Volo's obsession with her.

It's secretly everything she's ever wanted, and once Akari has confirmed it's entirely sincere and unwavering, she becomes just as obsessive over him.

28. How they feel about [insert character of your choice from the same fandom]

She holds a deep admiration and respect for Touko, due to her complete lack of hesitance in expressing her thoughts and feelings.

29. Eating habits

Prefers and has a high tolerance for spicier flavors.

She even crafts a new type of Lure Cake made specifically for attracting Fire-types (not that people are supposed to eat those).

30. Sleeping habits

Akari believes that her day begins whenever she wakes up, so she can be an absolute beast when forced to leave the comfort of her bed or futon.

31. If they had a Tumblr Tacklr what would it look like?

Her account is one the Sinnoh League required her to make in order to answer questions for interviews, and that would be the only thing she ever uses it for.

32. Something guaranteed to make them smile/laugh

Whenever Sariel, her Alpha Togekiss, slurps someone (gives them a big, slobbery lick).

It takes every last ounce of her willpower to keep her composure sometimes, depending on how extreme the reaction is of the person slurped.

33. Something guaranteed to make them cry

Her wedding day and the morning after.

Akari doesn't quite understand why she would be crying when she's never felt happier before.

34. How they react when they are feeling X emotion (sad, angry, excited, scared, etc.—can specify as many as you like)

Sometimes Akari smiles or chuckles when she isn't necessarily happy.

35. Their idea of a perfect day

An afternoon spent in the arms of her beloved as their Pokémon play together outside - with no annoying calls from the League demanding her presence.

36. Their favorite season

Hisui/Sinnoh doesn't experience any seasons due to having a cool climate year-round, but Akari does prefer cooler temperatures over warmer ones.

37. What they really think about themselves

A strong trainer and someone worthy of respect, but otherwise no one particularly extraordinary.

This is reflected in the first act of 'What Once We Were', Akari is described in a decidedly neutral manner, but come the second act when the story shifts to Volo's perspective, his adoration towards her is so powerful it affects the narration.

38. Favorite holiday

January 12th, the day diamond dust always falls on Snowpoint City.

39. Favorite game

I feel as though Yume Nikki and all its various fangames are something she would enjoy.

40. Favorite book

The Curse of Mankey Island (half-joking)

41. If they could have lunch with anyone in the world (living or dead, from any fictional universe or the real world), who would it be?

Her beloved~

But, if her lover isn't an option, her dear friend and fellow sister Touko.

42. 3 comfort items

Her Buneary Poké Doll, Old Gateau, and apparently Wheatley.

43. 3 favorite foods and 3 they despise

Her favorites are Tamato Berries, Jubilife Muffins, and as previously mentioned Old Gateau.

She dislikes extremely bitter berries, Coconut Curry, and anything Irida cooks.

44. Their happiest memory

Akari doesn't have one in particular that she would place above the others: choosing her starter ad setting out on her journey with Jun and Kouki, becoming the new Champion of Sinnoh, meeting other girls like her at the World Tournament...

Receiving her starter in Hisui from Professor Laventon and finally feeling some sense of normalcy return, followed by her first encountering Volo, who was one of the few to show her kindness and respect without having to prove herself beforehand.

45. Their favorite celebrity

Haruka, current Champion of Hoenn and fellow Contest Star!

46. The person they most admire

Touko, as mentioned above, but she also holds a great deal of respect towards Kotone for her persistent warmth and kindness.

47. Their dream job

She's content with her position as Champion of Sinnoh and one of the strongest trainers in the world.

48. Scariest moment of their life

Volo's betrayal.

That moment was her worst nightmare brought to life.

49. Favorite toy as a child

Her Buneary Poké Doll, Alice, that Jun bought her with his own allowance for her seventh birthday.

50. A memory they’ve blocked out

Akari has forgotten everything about her father to the point that she can't recall his face or even his name.

She's fine with this.

[themosleyreview]

The Mosley Review: Expendables 4

I believe we're all familiar with the term "too little, too late" correct? Well that's especially true for this installment of a dying now dead franchise. The first film was campy fun with a healthy amount of blood, guts and a promise that was to see the action legends of the past come together in a massive film. That promise was fulfilled and then we got a sequel that doubled down. The second film improved on everything the first film did and fulfilled the dream of seeing the big 3 action stars of the 80's together on screen gunning down goons in the most explosive and violent way possible. Then the franchise went completely off the rails with its PG-13 third entry. The franchise really lost its identity by trying to pander to the younger audience by watering down the best elements of the franchise and over crowding the film with the popular stars at the time. Now comes this entry that desperately tries to get back on track with it being the hyper violent action driven vehicle it started out as. Well, it got the violence part right but after that, we are treated to one of the dumbest, lackluster and uninteresting action films I've seen in quite some time. Not only are most of the action scenes so boring, the characters themselves are tired and should have retired along time ago. The novelty this franchise used to be have was all but drained from this sequel and I was so sad watching it happen.

Sylvester Stallone returns as Barney Ross and he still has the same charm as the character. He finally admits he's starting to get too old for his life style and is gone shortly after for most of the film. Jason Statham returns as his best friend Lee Christmas and he continues to be a fun character. The chemistry between them was the heart of the franchise and it continues here for the most part. Megan Fox joins the franchise as Lee's new girlfriend and CIA operator, Gina. Megan has done good work before, but this was by far her worst performance as she only is there for eye candy and delivering the worst onscreen chemistry I've ever seen between two "lovers". Randy Couture returns as Toll Road and he still does the same thing he's done since the first film. He delivers many random facts that somehow returns to him talking about his ear. Dolph Lundgren returns as Gunner Jensen and I still enjoy seeing his character go through many life changes. The character has shown real progress since his drunken days in the original and I liked that he has controlled that demon. Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson joins the team as Easy Day and he does his job. There really wasn't anything special about the character and he typically just fades into the background even when he's front and center. The great Tony Jaa joins the team as a former Expendable, Decha. There was a fun story that surrounded the character even though it was nothing you haven't seen before. I still enjoyed his presence on screen and when he gets to fighting, its still a joy to watch. Jacob Scipio joins as the son of former Expendable Galgo, Galan. He tries to capture that same energy that Antonio Banderas had in the previous film and that's basically it. Andy Garcia was all over the place as CIA Agent Marsh. He delivers his trademark charm in the beginning and the swings for the fences by the end of the film. He truly was having fun with the character and you could tell. The amazing Iko Uwais was the main protagonist of the film, Suarto Rahmat and what a waste. Sure he gets to show his amazing martial arts prowess, but that’s all. He wasn't menacing or even really that much of a threat once you get to the heart of his plot. He almost felt like a F1 racer stuck in the bus lane in a school pick up area. He never really got to open up against a worthy opponent.

The score by Guillaume Roussel was nothing special. It was a decent backing track to the action in the film and accents the few emotional moments in the film. The action in the film was somewhat decent, but truly lacked the joyous feel of playing with your favorite action figures the others had. It all felt cheaply made and even more so with over use of CGI for a franchise known for its practical stunts. The extreme close ups in the middle of all the fights truly showed the lack of skill in filming and design of action sequences. This film really knocked the genre back a few decades and I was sorely disappointed and bored. Honestly, if you have any curiosity in seeing this hopefully final chapter, don't waste your money and wait for streaming. This is undoubtedly one of the worst films of 2023. Let me know what you thought of the film or my review in the comments below. Thanks for reading!

[crying-pan420]

whoop part 9

ahhhhhhhhhh

———————————————

Aria, holding a gun: If the conspiracies about life being a simulation are true WHOEVERS CONTROLLING MY SIM I JUST WANNA TALK.

———————————————

 Phillip: My dad has a spiked collar.

Phillip: *dog

———————————————

 Marcus: I'm allergic to death.

———————————————

 Phillip: Why would you think any of this was a good idea?

Leo: Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.

Phillip:

Leo: I don’t know how you keep forgetting this.

———————————————

 Carrie: I've met a lot of pricks in my time, but you, Aria, are a fucking cactus.

———————————————

 Diego: My ultimate goal is to punch God in the eye, just to spite him one last time.

———————————————

*at a zoo*

Gail: What are they in for?

Alex: Gail, this isn't prison.

Gail: So they can leave?

Alex: No, but-

Gail, pointing at a meerkat: I bet that one murdered someone.

———————————————

Isaac: My head hurts.

Gail: That’s your brain trying to comprehend its own stupidity.

———————————————

Seymour : I hate Leo.

Isaac: "Hate' is a strong word.

Seymour : I have strong opinions.

———————————————

Paloma: If you got arrested what would be the charges?

Leo: Theft.

Gail: Disturbing the peace.

Isabelle: Aggravated assault.

Calypso: Arson.

Alex: All of the above. In that order, probably.

———————————————

Phillip: Is this about me?

Carrie: No.

Phillip: Then I've lost interest.

———————————————

Isabelle: Hey guys, today Leo pushed me, so I'm starting a kickstarter to put them down.

Isabelle: The benefits of killing them are that I would get pushed way less.

———————————————

Isabelle: "Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge" - Charles Darwin

Marcus: What the fuck? Begets isn't a word. Quit trying to make up words, fuckface.

———————————————

Isabella: You were wise to seek help from the world's most deadly weapon.

Isabella: It's me.

———————————————

Phillip: A party is a celebration of a life, bringing people together to let the guest of honor know how much they’re loved. Wren has done so much for us. This is our chance to do something for them.

Amira: By forcing them to have fun at a party that they don’t want to be at?

Phillip: I knew you’d understand.

———————————————

Leo: You know I think my life has value.

Isabelle: Who are you and what have you done with Leo?!

———————————————

Wren: I only have two emotions: exhaustion and stress. And I’m somehow always feeling both simultaneously.

———————————————

Lemon: What have you done with Isabella?

Echo: Nothing. Why, do you think I should?

———————————————

Carrie: I've connected the two dots.

Huì yǐng: You didn't connect shit.

Carrie: I've connected them.

———————————————

Gail: Happy Scorpio season. If you have to burn a bridge, do it safely!

Isabella: With NAPALM.

———————————————

Emmy: Why did you guys dress up as each other for Halloween?

Robin: Lemon is the scariest thing I could think of!

Lemon: Robin told me I should pick the dumbest costume possible.

———————————————

Aria: Life could be worse, Lemon.

Lemon: Life could be a lot better too!

———————————————

Isabelle: I sort of did something and I need some advice, but I don't want a lot of judgment and criticism.

Leo: And you came to me?

———————————————

Diego: Pros and cons of dating me.

Diego: Pros. You'll be the cute one.

Diego: Cons. Holy shit, where do I begin-

———————————————

Diego, when Paloma walks in: Oh, hey, I'm just making pizza.

Diego: *accidentally smacks Echo in the face with the baking sheet*

———————————————

Emmy: What do rainbows mean to you?

Aria: Gay rights.

Wren: There's money.

Paloma: The sign of God's promise to never destroy the whole Earth with a flood.

Isabella: It is an optical phenomenon that separates sunlight into its continuous spectrum when the sun shines on raindrops.

———————————————

*Sarah Marie rushes by with an armful of water bottles*

Aria: What's going on?

Wren: Sarah Marie wouldn't drink water.

Aria: ...And?

Wren: And I asked them how fast they could chug an entire bottle.

Sarah Marie, loudly: 16 OUNCES IN TEN SECONDS, BITCHES!

———————————————

Wren: You use humor to deflect your trauma.

Huì yǐng: Awww, thanks-

Wren: That’s not a good thing.

Huì yǐng: All I’m hearing is that you think I’m funny.

———————————————

Diego: On the count of three, what’s your favorite cake?

Diego & Robin: One, two, three-

Diego & Robin: Chocolate cake, peanutbutter frosting, and chocolate chunks!

Sarah Marie: Our turn, Evi! One, two, three-

Sarah Marie: Vanilla!

Evi: I’ve never had cake before. What is cake?

———————————————

Phillip: FUCK THE CHAIR. PARDON ME FOR MAKING MYSELF COMFORTABLE DURING A SINCERE HEART TO HEART DISCUSSION WITH A DEAR FRIEND IN NEED!

Phillip: BUT THE TIME HAS COME FOR ME TO CEASE STRADDLING THIS DEEPLY OFFENSIVE PIECE OF FURNITURE! AWAY WITH YE, FOUR LEGGED TEMPTRESS! DISTRACT US NO MORE WITH THE MOST BASIC AND UTILITARIAN FORM OF COMFORT YOU SUPPLY!

Lemon: Phillip just threw a tantrum about a chair.

Lemon: I just won Phillip Tantrum Bingo.

———————————————

Evi: What the fuck? People actually tell their crushes they like them??

Marcus: What the hell do you do?

Evi: I die? What kinda question...

———————————————

[thediaryofs0nic]

I'd like to write some of my thoughts from today. Why do my parents care so much about what happens between me and my boyfriend. They act like im dating as a 13 year old, im fucking 18. Let me and my own partner sleep in the same bed, stop being fucking weird about me having sex. Yall make me listen to it every other week and it's fucking weird. On top of that bs they also like to be randomly transphobic and homophobic out of the blue but no theyre not absolutely not. I wish my father wasn't so fucking weird about every fucking thing. Literally every day hes coming up to me and reading some shit thats either racist, homophobic, sexist, or just straight insensitive, whys he gotta be such an asshole. I just want to live and I dont want to talk about him because he doesn't respect me, he's always making me feel like the dumbest person in the fucking world with his man-splainy smart-ass attitude. I try to be considerate, I try to be generous, I try to stay out of his way but noooooo he wants to try and start shit every fucking day even with I haven't entertained it forever. I seriously don't have a single redeemable feature in my mind when describing him, I mean maybe MAYBE his knowledge of cars if he wasn't super fucking lazy. If im ever compared to him I will kill myself, ok a little far but serious he is the worst person ive met.

On another note, I just want to see my boyfriend and be our of this bullshit school. I might actually like school if I could focus but I'm always do 3 fucking things at once and can't give 100% of my attention at anything. I've been super fucking lazy when it comes to doing school work and I can't handle it. It's causing so much stress but I can't do it. I sit down and open an assignment and doing it is like torture, I literally keep getting distracted and I have to find ways to stimulate/quiet my brain enough to focus. I get the most work done when I'm sleep deprived or listening to ambience for fuck sake. I need to be diagnosed and medicated for depression and adhd but I cant handle my own problems, which, by the way, are all made up. I have to surround myself with things that give me a little bit of dopamine just to get by, masturbating every day multiple times, playing mindless video games, and spending hours on the internet because life is too hard to live. I can't handle this. I'm genuinely through with life because I don't quite see a point unless it's to have my one with my partner but that doesn't seem possible either. Fuck politicians, fuck religion, fuck my jackass father, fuck these homophobic nazi cunts, fuck the world. I want to live and express myself without having to worry about being ATTACKED AND KILLED IN THE STREET. The worst part is that I cant even trust the fucking POLICE to protect me. I feel more fear from looking at a police officer than I do looking at any suspicious looking criminal because at least its a 50% chance a suspicious person will have a gun but a 100% chance a police officer will and a 50% chance they'll try to kill me with or without it if they try to talk to me. I hate the world, I hate the government, I hate my father, i hate this cursed hell scape we live on. I am plagued by fear by simply existing. I can't see a shiny easy future for me. It won't be like that. I'll be stuck in this forever. I won't get out of this bullshit. We'll curse the world to melt into the sun without a piece of the human race having survived because of our own bullshit. I hate myself and I hate that I was ever born. Why did I have to ripe everyone into this shit.

[jue-nuit-grace]

Falling in love with a Twitch streamer is quite possibly the dumbest thing I've ever done. I haven't been able to to like anyone for the past 5-ish years and now the ability comes storming back with a streamer????

This is humiliating,,,,

Tho this is also the first time I've liked a real, human guy so it validates my identity a bit but f u c k

[otnesse]

@karma26 wrote: "It was a pretty good one! Once again we confirm that overconfidence and underestimating others can be quite harmful, Gastón is the proof. His plans were never consistent and lacked intelligent execution, his confidence is based on his popularity and appearance which led him to fail, Belle definitely knows how to use her intelligence and own thinking and yes, she is one of the smartest girls in Disney and Gastón is one of the less brilliant villains."

Agreed that Gaston was definitely not one of Disney's more brilliant villains (honestly, he's not even that much of a threat, and if anything the only reason he got nearly as far as he did was because the rest of the cast, yes, Belle included, were complete idiots). Also agreed in regards to how overconfidence and underestimating others can be harmful (though quite frankly, we don't even need those bits with Gaston to realize that bit. I've seen far better done antagonists fall for that).

I DON'T agree, however, that Belle was even remotely CLOSE to one of Disney's smartest girls. Actually, if anything, based on some of her actions in the film, she's probably one of Disney's dumbest girls in there, DESPITE her bibliophilia (which is literally the ONLY thing she has going for her ultimately). Let's not forget, the ONLY reason Gaston was even aware of the Beast, much less tried to kill him, was because Belle stupidly broadcasted who he was in a really poorly-planned attempt at saving her father. Had she TRULY been one of Disney's smartest girls, for example, she'd realize fully that trying to expose Beast like that would only succeed in ginning up a mob against him, ESPECIALLY considering she already deduced but a minute prior that Gaston orchestrated the mob to arrest Maurice under knowingly false pretenses specifically to blackmail her into marry her. Let me put it this way, a truly smart person would fully realize ESPECIALLY after that bit that if an unwanted suitor was going to go THAT far to try and force her hand in marriage, he also would be the type to outright MURDER anyone who that person might even slightly like better than the suitor, and thus would NOT try to expose the Beast precisely BECAUSE they'd anticipate what Gaston might do. They'd instead go for a fourth way, which is more Spec-Ops stuff or even what Team Scorpion does quite a few times. And that's not even getting into the wolf incident either, where she blindingly ran into a forest during a blizzard and nearly became wolf chow, completely failing to take into account the weather, the wolves, or heck, ESPECIALLY the possibility that, even if she had succeeded regarding both, Beast most likely would track Maurice down and imprison him AGAIN precisely BECAUSE Belle went back on her word.

I'm sorry, but Jasmine, Mulan, heck, even Cinderella and Ariel were arguably smarter than Belle. At least Jasmine actually acted as a part-time teacher in the TV series, Mulan was shown to have some degree of quick thinking (a greater degree than Belle EVER did, and she'd need to as a soldier), Cinderella was implied to be a gifted historian when talking with Gus, and Ariel, aside from showing some potential at anthropology (and not the Marxist kind either) was also hinted in the Shark scene to at least have enough street smarts to anticipate possible bad elements to her (such as using reverse psychology on Flounder when he tried to fake illness, which itself implied she was indeed fully aware of the risk of possibly running into and being killed by a shark during her plundering through sunken ships. Also the deal with Ursula, where she actually MADE an attempt to question Ursula's conditions of using her voice by pointing out she won't even be able to communicate with Eric at ALL before Ursula cut her off with the second half of Poor Unfortunate Souls.).

[michelleaneousart]

Has this been done before? There is no way I was the only one thinking those pure white robes were a bit risky impractical for a rainstorm/desert/jungle adventure?

So I guess this is an alternate ending to tros as they’d obviously stop right then and there to make out i mean who cares about palpi

[rachi-roo]

Issac Foster tickle hcs!

This been on my miiiiiind 🤭 Baby boi ❤️

Warning, rough tickles/handling

Zacky boy doesn't even know what tickling is when you first meet him but after some time you finally manage to pluck up the courage to ask if he is, without fear of being stabbed.

"The fuck is that? Some kind of mental problem'?"

"That's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard. Of course I'm not."

Once you explain, you swear you can see the red glow of blush through his bandages.

Over time Zack learns that tickling can be used to get what he wants, or to make you suffer without having to brutally murder you! :D

Ler:

As a ler, Zack is a force to be reckoned with. Evil. If you're not comfortable with rough tickles, you do not want him to catch you.

He will give you a time limit to run, counting loudly with that dirty grin on his face. Usually three seconds, you know how he likes the chase.

Once he's had his fun chasing, he will pin you any way possible. His favourite method is sitting on your waist with your arms pinned under his thighs.

He will tell you not to smile, threatening to 'kill you' if you do. By kill he means wreck you harder.

His tickles are rough and rude. He wants to break you, make you beg and maybe even tear up if he's feeling especially cruel. Sadistic little shit.

He's full of teases too~

"Tickle, tickle, ya' little fucker. Should have run faster!"

"If you weren't such a crap victim we wouldn't even be in this situation!"

"Uh oooh, now you've gone and done it, shit head. Time to die~"

Que him mercilessly attacking your worst spot until you almost wet yourself.

After he's finished tickling you to near death, he will probably tussle your hair and watch you try to regain your composure. He isn't one to flee after a wrecking because he knows you wouldn't dare attack him.

He does know when to stop though, he knows you and what the signs are. He may be an asshole, but he'll always at least ask if you're okay. If he doesn't think you are, then he'll help you up and fetch you a snack or even wrap an arm around you comfortingly.

Lee:

Yes, believe it or not, this multi-murder-maniac has a Lee side. And when it surfaces, it's quite entertaining.

If Zack is in one of his rare, yet very intense, Lee moods, he will do everything in his power to get you to notice without actually saying anything. He's gotta keep up that scary guy aesthetic.

When in this mood, Zack will walk around with his arms over his head, put his feet in your lap, maybe pretend his checking his bandages by leaving his hoodie unzipped.

Lots of huffing and sighing too. Very grumpy. Not-so subtly staring at you out of the corner of his eye to see if you've noticed then quickly gazing around the room if you look at him.

If you haven't noticed soon enough, he'll probably walk away without a word, hiding in his room like a grumpy kid.

If, however, you do catch on, you're in for a treat.

One rule Zack has, no tools. Only fingers and mouths. Something about using tools just makes him very uncomfortable.

His most sensetive spots are his neck, ribs and inner thighs. Any of them make him melt.

Once attacked, Zack will curl up into a ball, scrunching his nose and kicking his legs as he huggs himself. He won't ever admit it, but he does try to keep still. He's just so sensitive.

His laughter, when he's not being a maniac, is very sweet, light and boyish. You will definitely hear the occasional snort of even a voice crack here and there.

He'll threaten you a lot during his wrecking, it all means nothing though.

Once he's had enough he seems to miraculously recover his strength and escapes with ease.

After his escape, the tiredness hits and he'll usually go and have a nap on the couch. Spreading out across the cushions to spite your rude attack. No seat for you.

Zack is a sweet boy, tickles are his way of saying he cares. And they're a way for him to be able to laugh normally ❤️

25% Lee - 75% Ler

[heretherebedork]

Francis watches TT2 (Day... 4?)

First thought: I have to do this. Damnit, I have to do this.

Second thought: Leftover day old bagels and not enough cream cheese.

Third thought:... cut!

Episode 8

Man, I have appreciate every single time Type has punched someone in this series, honestly. Both seasons. He gets to punch people so well. I'm down for it.

But, also, seriously. Poor Type. This poor guy just had to hired by the biggest caricature in Thailand. What rough luck.

I'm too lazy to fastfoward through the theme song most of the time and it just makes me miss the background couples, ironically.

Why does Type speak at all about what's been going on in the job and what the boss said to him? Seriously? I mean, I guess he's that set on staying in the closet.

And Doc! Doc to the rescue! My baby boy! I love him so much. He's my tiny hero. I love him more and I didn't know that was possible. @absolutebl dgjkfd best character ever.

But also, like, this boss is literally the dumbest character caricature ever. Why would he bully and insult the person he's trying to make do his work for him? Like... if he'd put any effort into keeping Type happy instead, he could have kept pushing the work onto him no problem!

Also, all these complaints and they've never done anything else until now? lol this place sucks.

Seriously, Doc is my BABY and favorite boy and I've decided he deserves his own series with Champ where they run a restaurant and figure out how their relationship works while everyone around them is an idiot.

/eyeroll/ Of course Tharn came up with the plan to help Type. He can't talk to Type because they can only communicate with other people.

The entire university did not misunderstand him. He really was a homophobic asshole, he just grew and changed.

I do love how useless Champ is, though. He's another one of my 'headcanon as demi/ace' characters. I'm truly fascinated by how many of those MAME writes, tbh. It's just kind of a thing with her. Unhealthy relationships and demisexual boys.

Ah, yes, Tharn just absolutely forgetting about his phone. That's super common for him oh wait he's never done it before ever.

Awww, lonely Type. Think of this as time to... consider reading a few books on communicating with loved ones?

They're seriously so much better over the phone. They should start handling all their issues by sitting a couple miles apart on phones because they can't talk when they're close enough to talk.

I do really like their comforter/pillow set.

Also, Type's jealousy absolutely makes more sense than anything Tharn could think of, since Tharn is actually traveling and works with the person Type's worried about. I mean, it's stupid either way. But it makes a bit more sense.

Did I mention the books about communication? Yeah. Go read those.

oh boy he's staring at a rose. is this over yet?

MAH BOYS. I love this shirt on Fiat. I want this shirt. If I weren't so bad at fashion and money and everything, I'd buy a bunch of those colorblock shirts and just live in them.

Tiny Fiat trying to come up with time to flirt with Type and then Leo's little smirk when it turned out he quit? Ugh, still love it. It's kind of stupid, though. Seriously Leo.

Tiny Fiat panicking at the idea of losing Type and Leo trying to control him but also just wanting to comfort him at the same time. This is definitely a strict Leo than we got in DSN.

Oh, fuck me, this scene.

This scene still stands as the time I most wanted to slam their heads together. It's both of them being absolute idiots and trying to say what they apparently think the other one wants to hear and it's SO STUPID it hurts me physically every time. Fiat saying Leo's only a friend and it's not the same and then Leo confirming it because they're both saying 'I love you but you don't love me' only they're IDIOTS.

And then Leo goes and gets Fiat Type's info, the last thing he wants to do, because he decided that Fiat will never love him and then Fiat still gets all whiny at him and wants a piggyback ride and this always confused me a bit because it felt like Fiat had decided to move on but also still wanted Leo all to himself.

Tharn's family is the best family, seriously. I love them and they deserved a better show and a better son.

I do find it odd that Type quit after everything was settled and he was going to be working for someone else.

lol stalker Fiat. But he looks good in purple.

Fiat's such a brat and I love him for it. His desperation to get attention and keep it makes a lot more sense with the trauma but, like, dear lord he and Leo are so dumb. Especially when Type turns down taking him to his room because of his partner.

Seriously, the idea of Type bringing the person he's cheating on Tharn with to Jeed's bar is so stupid and it's such a pointless suspicion.

The most consent this series has ever given us: Type asking before he touches Jeed's belly.

I still can't believe that Type keeps giving in and talking to Fiat. Seriously, boy, you've got a ton of friends. Why talk to this random stranger who stalks and harasses you?

They really did soften both Leo and Fiat for DSN. And that's okay, they're both pretty abrasive in their own ways in this. But it's interesting to see. This Fiat doesn't seem like the type who'd run from his problems with Leo once they got together. He seems so much like he'd just cling on tighter and never let go.

Ugh, have I mentioned they're all idiots?

Oh boy, the suspected cheating plot on both sides. wheeee. I don't care. Your relationship sucks.

fiat_tiaf is my new favorite way to make up a name for a website.

Ugh, Champ and Doc are so cute it's almost painful. How dare they be this cute. Especially Champ. He named the dish after Doc! And yet remain oblivious! He and Ae could have talks about what it means to have no clue what romance means.

Champ is the most darling idiot in Thailand. Poor Doc.

Oh, look, the cutest scene with Tharn and Type so far is the one I know is fake because I watched this before in my LeoFiat watch of this show. This would be cute if it weren't just a drunk dream.

Episode 9

blah blah hug that's not real. This is the cutest bit, though, so whatever.

Yeah, see, this Fiat doesn't mesh as well with the Fiat we saw with Leo in DSN. He's so much more self-assured and so much more certain of what he wants and more willing to take it. Now, that might just be because he's more desperate... but he's plenty desperate to keep Leo, let's be honest. I dunno.

Ah, yes, Leo has come out to play and protect other people from Fiat. This is a fascinating scene, honestly, especially with DSN done. Because we did see a different version of this exactly lift in that but a lot happier.

Also, poor drunk Type. at least he's at a friend's bar?

This is the moment that I expected a confession and am eternally disappointed we didn't get it. Also, damn, Leo never took control like this again in DSN.

Seriously, this was the best moment for a goddamn confession. So much better than the kidnapping. Imagine Leo confessing in that moment, looming over Fiat, and then just... not giving him a chance to respond, just pulling him in and telling him not to respond when he's drunk.

Leo loves when Fiat is his whiny little brat, let's be honest. He'd never punish him for whining because he likes when he does.

Also, the way they sleep? BOYS. Don't make me break out the same 'idiots' meme again!

Absolutely grateful that Type passed out drunk at Jeed's bar and not somewhere random.

Ah, yes, another 'pin Fiat to a wall and somehow don't confess' scene.

Leo, you like it when he whines. Stop complaining.

Look at that communication! Why did this take a whole season to get back to? But also Fiat is pushing so hard and he gives Leo the BEST chance to confess and Leo basically DOES and Fiat doesn't listen or respond and so Leo panics in his own way and then Fiat just plain panics.

And they cry. I still imagine this one over Hallelujah.

Leo literally says "I can be your husband" and Fiat still doesn't get the damn picture until post kidnapping and it's SO STUPID. They're SO STUPID. I do remember discussing this when it aired. It's obvious that Fiat just wants to be claimed but also that Leo wants to be chosen and they basically constantly circle both wanting the same thing but never wanting to intiate. They did explain this a bit in DSN but it's still stupid.

Type is basically just spending this episode in bed(s).

Seo and Klui got ruined and now they're just boring time fillers.

Tharn didn't notice his phone ran out of batteries? While working? Good... good job?

Yeah, he hasn't said yes because you barely talk to him and never actually discuss things because you're both just the worst.

Do people really go to to a doctor for a headache and a minor fever?

Seriously, they're a lot cuter over the phone than they are in person because it forces them to use their words and communicate with each other.

Also, who does Tharn work for? Isn't is implied he mostly works for himself? I'm pretty confused on that.

Awwww, sick and sore Type is pretty adorable. And Fiat showing up, like the stalker brat he is? Love him. But also how the fuck did he find out Type was sick? Although Fiat does show that he's pretty good at taking care of people in this. Even if he's a brat about it.

Ugh, y'all, I am so bored of these idiots and this nonsensical plot that doesn't add up and the complete lack of communication in any way between anyone.

Fiat apologizing to the picture of Type and Tharn is... interesting. But also, agian, nonsensical. Dude. You really think you're gonna win Type from his longterm boyfriend by doing this? Like... oy vey, boy.

I will admit that I didn't watch this part in my original watch because I didn't give a fuck. I still don't. How is this episode still going? For fuck's sake.

Oh, it's a dramatic sting! It's Bob's cousin, Tom!

oh look it's time for misunderstandings and drama. yay. exactly what i needed in this show. yay again.

Fit being a tiny idiot and Phugun being oblivious, poor boy. Don't worry, Cir will take care of you.

But also this is so stupid. The stupid is overwhelming. Also, Phugun is one of the best characters of all time and I adore him. He's absolutely oblivious to what Fiat's laying down and Fiat has no idea because he is also an idiot.

Poor, confused Phugun.

I love how straightfoward but whiny Phugun is when he wants comfort. I adore their relationship so much. They're so, so kinky and darling and loving. I adore them.

Doc! Best character!

... wow do I not care about Tharn and Type at all at this point. I know that the next plot point is physically stupid so... you know. Not thrilled.

Doc is so darling and Champ is an idiot and I love just... listening to anyone talk about them in general. So darling. Such idiot.

And Leo walking away from Fiat, you can watch both of them be hurt and it's so, so... stupid.

This is the point where I really wish that the show had just ended with something soft like was about to happen here rather than three more episode of drama and stupidity.

Also, hoo boy, tomorrow's gonna be a doozy folks! I'm watching 10-11-12 and I'm gonna try to survive.

lol the suffering.

[mimisempai]

I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you 2/3

Summary:

Loki would like to express his feelings to Mobius but doesn’t know how to do it, he finds a sympathetic ear in Miss Minutes, without knowing that Mobius is suffering from the same problem…

Chapitre 1/3 - Chapter 2/3 - Chapitre 3/3

A little story, of love, of friendship, of two idiots in love…

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32351812

3804 words - Rating G

"Good job Loki!" Mobius smiled at Loki before continuing, "I'm really going to believe you're trying to steal my job," and then he headed for his office.

On the way, he thought about the weeks that had passed since they had taken over the TVA and completely restructured it. Loki had settled in incredibly well and was completely invested in his job as a TVA agent. Mobius wanted to tell him more often how proud he was of him, but he didn't want to sound condescending.

What amazed him even more was how well they had both fitted in with each other. For two beings as different as they were, the life together was going pretty well.

Mobius found it quite amusing, even touching, every time Loki was confronted with ordinary things, such as doing the dishes or putting away the laundry. Loki, god of mischief, adapting to a domestic life, what an incredible concept! Moreover, although Loki was now allowed to use magic without restriction, he preferred to do without.

When Mobius decided to use Loki to catch Sylvie a few months ago, he never thought they would get that far, and yet here they were. Loki had managed to get into his heart, without even having to use one of his tricks. But what Mobius never expected was that his affection would be returned.

Loki seemed to be very fond of him, but Mobius always feared the day when he would realize that he could do better, much better. That's why Mobius hadn't told him. Loki deserved to be free, and Mobius didn't want to be the ball and chain that held him back.

Sitting at his desk, he let out a sigh and shook his head as if to chase away his gloomy thoughts.

"What a sigh! It looks like you're carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders!"

"Sylvie!" The young woman was leaning in the doorway.

"Tired of married life already?" asked Sylvie impishly.  She stepped forward and sat down on one of the armchairs opposite Mobius.

This had been the second surprise, the friendship he had formed with the one who had been his nemesis for years, when he had been a pawn on Ravonna's chessboard.  Loki had told him that there was nothing surprising about it, because not only did Mobius' caring nature make him capable of forming bonds with anyone, but since Sylvie was theoretically another Loki, it was only natural that some of their common traits would have allowed Mobius and the young woman to form this bond.

"Tired of married life? It would be quite the opposite."

"That's perfect then!"

"It'll only be harder when he leaves." muttered Mobius softly.

"Huh?"

"Don't play dumb, you heard me just fine."

Sylvie leaned forward and replied genuinely surprised, "Oh I heard you very well, but I'd like to know what makes you think Loki is going to leave?"

"Everything! Look at me and look at him! What do I have that would hold someone like Loki back? I'm just a plain person, nothing extraordinary. "

Sylvie pretended to tear her hair out, "No, but really, you are the dumbest couple of idiots in the universe! Loki doesn't care about any of this, do you realize that the day you first told Loki that you didn't see him as a villain, you tied him to you for life?!"

Mobius protested, "That's gratitude, not am-"

"Shut up you idiot! You know what Loki once told me? That the day you asked him to help you catch me, he was ready to follow you, and you know why? Because it was the first time he had the possibility of a relationship not based on lies. You knew everything about him and you didn't lie to him about what you wanted. For Loki, that's extremely precious. You didn't see him after you were pruned, I did. He was devastated, Mobius! Devastated! I really thought I couldn't reach him. You don't feel that kind of emotion for someone you want to leave!"

Mobius protested again, more weakly, "but that was different, the context was different, he didn't have enough perspective to assess the situation objectively. Now that he has time to think, he'll quickly realize that he could have someone better."

Sylvie interrupted him again, "You're just a moron. You're not going to be like everyone else before you, deciding what's best for him, are you? You freed him from his destiny, so let him make his own choices!"

Mobius muttered, "But what if that choice isn't me?"

"I wonder why I'm wasting my time, it's not even me you should be talking to about this!"

She stood up abruptly, "Come on, come with me! And no discussion!"

"But-"

"No discussion I said!"

He surrendered and followed her. Seeing that they were coming near Loki's office, he stopped and said, "No Sylvie!"

"Shut up and follow me!"

He reluctantly followed her, not being at all ready for this kind of conversation. They arrived at the half-open door, she turned and motioned for him to be quiet. Loki's voice reached his ears.

"But it's true! I swear! It makes me want to take off those jeans every time!"

"Lokiiii! That's enough!" Miss Minutes gave him a little kick and Loki laughed out loud.

Mobius behind Sylvie could not see them well, but he heard perfectly what Miss Minutes said, "Loki, tell Mobius, tell him everything you just told me, I don't know any person in the world who wouldn't like to hear everything you just told me."

His lover's voice sounded sad as he said, "But what do I have to offer him? I am not a good person for him. And I'm still waiting for the day when he can't stand my kind anymore and tells me I have to leave."

"A couple of idiots, that's what I'm saying." said Sylvie loudly before Mobius could stop her.

Loki shouted, "Sylvie?!" then turned around and shocked, shouted again, "Mobius?"

Sylvie opened the door fully, pushed Mobius into the office and with her hands on her hips said curtly, "I've done my part of the job, come on Mimi, we'll let those two idiots talk.Two true kings of communication."

"I'm coming." The little clock jumped toward her.

Sylvie closed the door saying, "Lock up behind you guys, wouldn't want anyone to stumble upon you in a compromising situation!"

"Sylvie!"

Both she and Miss Minutes laughed as they heard the outraged shouting of the two men behind the door followed by the unmistakable sound of a lock being closed.

[gascon-en-exil]

A Game of Thrones 10th Anniversary Season Ranking: Part 2

Link to Part 1

Time for the bottom half of the list. The four seasons here will surprise no one, but the order might.

#5 Season 6

You can tell what I most what to talk about here...but there's an order to these things.

S6 actually has a bunch of great ideas, but they drown beneath the most slapdash plotting and character work the show has seen yet in order to set the stage for the narrower conflicts of the last two seasons. It's notorious for bringing back characters who haven't been seen in a season or longer only to kill them off (Balon Greyjoy, Osha, Hodor, the Blackfish, Rickon, Walder Frey) or awkwardly graft them back into the main plot (Sandor Clegane, Bran). There are plot threads that ought to be compelling but are too rushed in execution, like the siege of Riverrun, Littlefinger's hand in the Battle of the Bastards, or Daenerys's time back among the Dothraki and then finally getting the hell out of Meereen. Arya hits on the only interesting part of her two-season sojourn in Braavos - a stage play, of all things - only for it to stumble at the end with a disappointing offscreen death and some incomprehensible philosophy ahead of the start of her murder tour of Westeros. There's also so much cutting off the branches, enough to be conspicuous; the final shot of Daenerys leading an armada of about half the remaining cast she assembled partially offscreen says that better than anything else. Well, not anything....

Highlight: Without exaggeration, the opening of S6E10 is easily my favorite sequence in all of GoT. The staging, the music, the mounting suspense even as it becomes increasingly obvious what's about to happen, the twisted religious references particularly in Cersei's mock confession to Unella, Tommen throwing himself out a window because he can't deal with the reality of how terrible his mother is, how Cersei gives absolutely no fucks whatsoever about murdering hundreds of people at once in a calculated act of vengeance largely prompted by her own poorly thought out actions - I love it all. It's the single most masterfully-executed act of villainy in the whole show - Daenerys torching King's Landing probably has a higher body count, but the presentation there is all muddled - and if I had any doubts about Cersei being my favorite multi-season major character they were silenced in this moment. The explosion of the Sept doesn't sit perfectly with me, because I liked the Tyrells and because of what I said about deaths like theirs and Renly's in the previous post under S2, but I think that unease only cements the strength of this sequence. It's an overused phrase in fandom these days, but GoT at its best is all about moral greyness that gives its audience room for multilayered reactions. Cersei nuking the Sept and making herself the sole power in King's Landing, which in a sense is just a more overt example of the kind of character/plot consolidation elsewhere represented by Daenerys's armada, is one of those events that's impossible to approach from a single angle if you care about any of the characters involved. And hey, it's not in the books (yet, presumably), so unlike Ned's death or the Red Wedding the GoT showrunners can take the credit for realizing this one.

Favorite death: Even leaving aside the Sept and related deaths there's a lot of good ones to choose from in S6. Ramsey is cathartic but too gory for me, Osha's was a clever callback but a little delayed, it's hard to pin down specific deaths when Daenerys incinerates the khals, and Arya only gets half credit for Walder Frey and his sons when she saves the rest of the house for the opening of S7. I'm thinking Hodor, not so much because I enjoy his character or the manner of his death but because it's a clever bit of playing with language (that must have been hell to render in other languages for dubbing) wrapped up in some entertainingly murky consent issues and some closed time loop weirdness. It's all very...extra? Is that the word for it?

Least favorite death: Offscreen deaths continue to be mostly letdowns, in this case Blackfish and the Waif. Way to botch the ending of Arya's already near-pointless Braavos arc, guys. Speaking of Arya, this spot goes to Lady Crane, whom the Waif somehow kills with a stool or something. It's a dumb way to send off an entertaining minor character.

#6 Season 8

I swear that I'm not putting S8 this high solely because of Jonmund kind of sort of happening. I've never been very interested in either of them and the sex would be far too bear-on-otter to suit my pornographic preferences, but even so the choice to close out the series with them is hilarious.

I really don't need to elaborate on why S8 is down here; everyone who's ever watched the show has done as much in the nearly two years since it wrapped up. I do however need to explain why I've ranked not one but two seasons below it. My biggest argument here is that I don't believe it's fair to critique S8 for problems it inherited from earlier seasons. A non-comprehensive list:

Mad Queen Daenerys: unevenly built up beginning from S1 and continuing in some form through every following season

The questionable racial optics of Dany's army: also seeded as early as S1 and solidified by S3 with the Slaver's Bay arc

Cersei only succeeding because she makes stupid decisions and then lucks out until she doesn't: apparent from S1, directly lampshaded by Tywin in S3, fully on display with the Faith Militant arc of S5-6

Jaime not getting a redemption arc or falling in love with Brienne: evident with his repeated returns to Cersei throughout the show as one of the most consistent elements of his character, particularly in S4 and during the siege of Riverrun in S6

Tyrion grabbing the idiot ball/becoming a flat audience surrogate mouthpiece: started in S5 around the time the showrunners ran out of book material for him and wanted to make him more of a PoV character and his arc less of a downward spiral, although I've seen arguments that changes from the books involving his Tysha story and Shae set him on this trajectory even earlier

The hardening of Sansa's character: began in earnest in S4 and never let up from there

The strange ordering of antagonists: set down by S7's equally strange plot structure - the Night King had to come first with that setup

CleganeBowl and the dumber twists: from what I've heard the whole thing of writing around fans on the internet guessing plot twists started pretty much when the book content ended, so S5-6 maybe?

Yes, there's plenty to criticize about S8 on its own merits...but just as much that was merely the writers doing what they could at that point with deeply flawed material.

Highlight: This may sound cheesy, but the better parts of S8 are almost all the cinematic ones, whether that's E2 being a bottle episode with tons of poignant character send-offs before the big battle, a handful of deaths with actual satisfying weight like Jorah's and Theon's, and an epilogue that incorporates both closure for individuals and the broader uncertainty of messy socio-political systems that GoT has always been known for before working its way back to the Starks at the very end for some tidy bookending. Even imperfect moments like the Lannister twins' death and the resolution of Sansa's character felt weighty and appropriate based on what had come before.

Favorite death: Forget about the audio commentary attempting to flatten Cersei's character; Cersei and Jaime Lannister have an excellent end. Cersei especially, as the scenes of her stumbling her way down into the catacombs as the Red Keep crashes down around her really show off how her world is abruptly falling apart and how she retreats into her own self-interest at the end in spite of her demise being at least partially of her own doing. There's some stupid moments associated with these scenes, like Jaime dueling Euron to the death and CleganeBowl, but I can excuse those when the twins end up dying exactly where you'd expect them to: in each other's arms, in a ruined monument to their family's grand ambitions that, like Casterly Rock itself, was taken from another family.

Least favorite death: Quite a few dumb ones in S8 have become forever infamous. Missandei sticks out, and for me Varys too just as much because of how the writing pushes him to do the dumbest thing he could possibly do purely for the sake of killing him off ten minutes into the penultimate episode. But no one belongs here more than Daenerys Targaryen, killed at the height of a rushed and uncertain villain reveal by a man who takes advantage of their romantic history (who is also her family, because Targaryens) to stab her in a moment of vulnerability - pretty much only because another man tells him that Daenerys is the final boss. Narratively speaking that might be the case, but even so this is the end result of multiple seasons of middling-to-bad buildup. Not even Drogon burning the symbolism can salvage that. Also Fire Emblem: Three Houses did this scene and did it better.

#7 Season 5

...Yeah, we're going to have to go there.

Sansa's rape is not a plot point that personally touches me much. It's terribly framed in the moment and the followup in later seasons is inconsistent at best, but it's not a kind of trauma I can relate to. On the other hand, in the very same episode Loras is tried and imprisoned for homosexuality, and Margery faces the same punishment for lying for her brother. That hits much closer to home, not just for the homophobia but also for the culture war undertones of the not!French Tyrells persecuted by a not!Anglo fanatic who later reveals himself to be the in-universe equivalent of a Protestant. The trial is just one part of Cersei's shortsighted scheming, just as Sansa being married off to Ramsey is part of Littlefinger's, and both of them get their comeuppance in the end...but it's unsettling all the same. I especially hate what the Faith Militant arc does to King's Landing in S5, swiftly converting it from my favorite setting in GoT to a tense theocratic nightmare that only remains interesting to me because Cersei is consistently awesome. What's more, pretty much everything about S5 that isn't viscerally uncomfortable is dragged out and dull instead: the Dorne arc, Daenerys's second season in Meereen, Arya in Braavos, Stannis and co. at Castle Black. The most any of these storylines can hope for is some kind of bombastic finale, and while several of them deliver it's not enough to make up for what comes before, or how disappointing everything here builds from S4. S4 has Oberyn, S5 has the Sand Snakes - I think that sums up the contrast well.

Highlight: S5 does get stronger near the end. As much as his character annoys me I did like the High Sparrow revealing his pseudo-Protestant bent to Cersei just before he imprisons her, and there's a cathartic rawness to Cersei's walk of atonement where you can both feel her pain and humiliation and understand that she's getting exactly what she deserves (and this is what leads into the climax of S6, so it deserves points just for that). The swiftness of Stannis's fall renders his death and that of his family a bit hollow, but it's brutal and final and fittingly ignominious for a character with such grand ambitions but so little relevance to the larger story. The fighting pits of Meereen sequence is cinematic if nothing else, and even the resolution to the Dorne arc salvages the whole thing a tiny bit by playing into the retributive cycles of vengeance idea (and Myrcella knows about the twincest and doesn't care, aww - no idea why that stuck with me, but it's cute all the same). Oh, and Hardhome...it's alright. Not great, not crap, but alright.

Favorite death: I don't know why, but Theon tossing Myranda to her death is always funny to me. Maybe because it's so unexpected?

Least favorite death: Arya's execution of Meryn Trant is meant to be another one of the season's big finale moments, but the scene is graphic and goes on forever and I can't help but be grossed out. This is different from, say, Shireen's death, which is supposed to be painful to witness.

#8 Season 7

I can't tell if S7's low ranking is as self-explanatory as S8's or not. At least one recent retrospective on GoT's ruined legacy I've come across outright asserts that S7 is judged less harshly in light of how bad S8 was. If it were not immediately obvious by where I've placed each of them, I don't share that opinion.

Because S7 is just a mess, and the drop-off in quality is so much more painful here than it is anywhere else in the series except maybe from S4 to S5 (and that's more about S4 being as good as it is). The pacing ramps up to uncomfortable levels to match the shortened seasons, the structure pivots awkwardly halfway through from Daenerys vs. Cersei to Jon/Dany caring about ice zombies, said pivot relies largely on characters (mostly Tyrion) making a series of catastrophically stupid tactical decisions, and very few of the smaller set pieces land with any real impact as the show's focus narrows to its endgame conflict. As with S6 there are still some good ideas, but they're botched in execution. The conflict between Sansa and Arya matches their characters, but the leadup to that conflict ending with Littlefinger's execution is missing some key steps. Daenerys's diverse armada pitted against Cersei weaponizing the xenophobia of the people of King's Landing could have been interesting, but there's little room to explore that when Cersei keeps winning only because Tyrion has such a firm grip on the idiot ball and when Euron gets so much screentime he barely warrants. Speaking of Tyrion's idiot ball, does anyone like the heist film-esque ice zombie retrieval plotline? Its stupidity is matched only by its utter futility, because Cersei isn't trustworthy and nobody seems to ever get that.

And how could I forget Sam's shit montage? Sums up S7 perfectly, really. To think that that is part of the only extended length of time the show ever spends in the Reach....

Highlight: A handful of character moments save this season from being irredeemable garbage. As you can guess from my screencap choice, Olenna's final scene is one of them, even if Highgarden itself is given insultingly short shrift. S7 also manages what I thought was previously impossible in that it makes me care somewhat about Ellaria Sand, courtesy of the awful death Cersei plans for her and her remaining daughter. The other Sand Snakes are killed with their own weapons, which shows off Euron's demented creativity if nothing else. I like the entertainingly twisted choice to cut the Jon/Dany sex scene with the reveal that they're related. And, uh...the Jonmund ship tease kind of makes the zombie retrieval team bearable? I'm really grasping at straws here.

Favorite death: It's more about her final dialogue with Jaime than her actual death, but again I'm going to have to highlight Olenna Tyrell here for lack of better options. She drops the bombshell about Joffrey that the audience figured out almost as soon as it happened but still, makes it plain what I've been saying about how Jaime's arc has never really been about redemption, and is just about the only person to ever call Cersei out for that whole mass murder thing. There's a reason "I want her to know it was me" became a meme format.

Least favorite death: There aren't any glaringly bad deaths in S7, just mediocre or unremarkable ones. I still think the decision to have Arya finish off House Frey in the season's opening rather than along with their father at the end of S6 was a strange one that doesn't add much of dramatic value.

[imaginejamesandsirius]

So lately I've been reading a lot of your fics and I was wondering if you would do one for genderswap James and Sirius. You can genderswap one or both, it doesn't matter. Also great writing, I love reading your stories.

((A/N: I’m not really comfortable writing normal genderswap, so this is a dimension crossover, where women James and Sirius come over and meet the guy versions of themselves))

"So you wanted to go forward in time to see what you'd look like in ten years, but wound up here instead?" Sirius asked. That was what he'd gotten from the story at least. 

Girl-Sirius nodded. It was an alternate universe version of him, so it should've looked more like him than anyone else, but mostly she looked like Bellatrix. Girl-James had looked like James only with longer hair, so it hadn't been a mystery who she was. Trying to get all four of them to take turns talking hadn't worked so well when they appeared out of nowhere, so they'd decided to pair off and then compare notes afterwards. "Me and Jamie did the modifications on the time turner last week. It should've been fine but now we're in this bloody weird place instead," she said, wrinkling her nose as she looked around. 

Sirius glared at her. Yeah maybe this universe wasn't the greatest thing ever, but he was staying with the Potter's instead of being trapped in Grimmauld Place. This place was pretty damn swell to him. Plus they were in his room, and his room looked great. "What, you don't like bikes?" 

"Can't say they're my style, no," she said, eyeing one poster like it was particularly foul. 

Sirius huffed and rolled his eyes. "I guess you can't teach taste." 

"What are you doing with a room in the Potter mansion anyways? Or is this not the Potter mansion here?" 

"It is. Are you still living with your parents?" 

"Well yeah, I'm sixteen. You're not?" 

"Fuck no. I mean, I'm sixteen, yeah, but I'm not living with them anymore. They sort of kicked me out." Sirius made a face then added, "I sort of left." 

"Why'd they kick you out? Like yeah, I bloody hate them, but I've only got to stick it out for another couple breaks and then I can get the hell out of there. What did you do?" 

Sirius didn't really know what to do with this. This was weirder than her being a girl-version of him. She still lived there? "I- well- I mean, they didn't take it well when they found out about me and James." To put it lightly. 

"That you're friends?" she said, frowning. "My parents knew about that a week into first year; how did you hide it for that long? Are you not in Gryffindor?" 

"What?" Sirius asked, frowning at her in return. "They didn't like that we were dating." They hadn't liked that they were friends either, but it was sort of a footnote with Sirius not being a blood supremacist and having a detention log longer than the Black Family Tree and liking muggle inventions. "Totally lost their shit when they caught us. Mr. and Mrs. Potter already knew, so they said I could live with them. That's why I'm here. Nowhere else to go, y'know? Not that I mind living here. The only bad thing to come from it so far is that they both talked to us about safe sex. That's an hour of my life that I can't erase from my memory." 

"Wh- you and Jamie?" 

"Yeah." 

"Really?" 

"What's that supposed to mean? I'm bloody amazing." 

"Sure, but Jamie's..." 

"What about James?" If Sirius got into a fight with himself over James being the best thing on the planet, then that's just what he had to do. 

"Well I don't know about yours, but my Jamie is definitely not interested in me. She's only got eyes for Lily sodding Evans." 

Sirius blinked. This was so buggering weird. "James fancied Lily, but only for the first couple years of school. He got over her ages ago." 

"Good for him. My Jamie's acting like she's never going to get over her, and even if she did, she wouldn't want me." 

"You sound awfully sure. Did she say that?" 

"She didn't have to," Girl-Sirius grumbled. 

"Huh." 

"What?" 

"I'm no longer the dumbest person I know." 

"Hey!" 

"Oh come off it, mate," Sirius said. "You can't know for sure that your James doesn't like you unless you ask her. And you can't be an arse about it. Walking up and demanding to know if she fancies you is a great way for her to think you're being insincere." 

"What kind of ponce are you? Insincere? Talk to her? No thanks, I'd rather not embarrass myself and utterly ruin our friendship." 

"If you can ruin your friendship with her by telling her that you fancy her, maybe it wouldn't be that big of a loss. And for your information, I am the best kind of ponce. I wear makeup and I have a skirt and everything." 

Girl-Sirius snorted. "I didn't mean it like that and you know it. Berk. Look, I'm glad that everything's worked out for you and your Jamie, but it's not like that with us. I've got a little crush. So minor it's barely worth mentioning, and she's never looked at me like that." 

Sirius didn't believe that for a second, so he rolled his eyes and muttered, "Whatever. Want to go see how they're doing? Wait. D'you still have the time turner you used?" 

"Jamie has it." 

Sirius nodded, and they left his room to go to James's. His door was open so they were able to walk right in, and instead of leading with anything helpful to getting them back to their own world, Sirius said, "Did you know that they're not dating?" 

James pointed at Sirius and gave his counterpart a meaningful look. "See? I told you it's weird." Then he dropped his hand and grinned at Sirius. "I like our universe." 

"Only because of that? Not because you- I dunno, like being a bloke?" 

"Meh," James said with a shrug, and Sirius laughed. 

"You've got the time turner?" Sirius said, looking at Jamie. 

"Yeah." She pulled it out of her pocket, then they all frowned at it. That did not look like a normal time turner. For one, the sand was red. For another, the rim was silver instead of gold. "Er. It didn't look like that before. We tried to turn it again when we figured out we weren't in the right place, but it's like it was stuck. It was the right colour back then, though." She blinked. "Erm. I don't really know what to do with this," she said, shoving it back in her pocket like they wouldn't have to worry about it if they couldn't see it. 

"Talk to the Ministry?" James suggested, making a face. None of them wanted to talk to the Ministry about anything official-- James and Sirius because they were animagi, and their counterparts because they'd gone into this hoping to misuse a time turner and they were going to get in deep shite for that. 

"Last resort," Sirius said. "As much as I'd love to sit here and make fun of you two for not thinking this through, I'm hungry." 

James snorted. "Like we always think shite through." 

"Hey, have we ever gotten stranded in an alternate universe? No. Bugger off." 

They made sandwiches and talked about ways to get them back and the magical theory that they had used on the time turner. They were barely getting into it when Mr. and Mrs. Potter got back home. "Hmm," Mrs. Potter said, eyes taking in the scene in front of her. "Dear? Do you mind explaining?" 

"You know how I always said I wanted two Sirius's?" James said with a bright grin. 

His parents blinked. "We're going to go to my study," Mr. Potter said. "Can we trust that when we get home from dinner with the Longbottom's tonight this will be resolved?" 

"Er," Sirius said. "We'll try our best?" It was the best he could offer since none of them knew how quickly they'd be able to do this. They didn't even know what 'this' was. They had no idea what they needed to do, and once they figured that out, there was no telling if it was going to be a quick fix or if they had to wait a month or summat. 

Mr. Potter nodded, but they hesitated before leaving the room entirely. "You know boys, an orgy can seem like a lot of fun, but you have a responsibility to-" 

"Oh Merlin," Sirius moaned, covering his face. 

Mrs. Potter started to talk. "You should always be safe and-" 

"Mum," James cut in, face flaming. "We're fine. We'll see you later." 

She hummed, and the adults left the room. James dropped his head to the table. 

"I thought it couldn't possibly be worse than the last time." 

"It wasn't; they didn't finish this time," Sirius muttered from behind his hands. "Let's just forget that ever happened." 

Girl-Sirius wasn't quite so willing to let it go though. "What did you mean when you said you wished you could have two Sirius's?" 

"Well Sirius is the best thing ever, so if I have two of them, than the world is twice as amazing." James stated it so plainly; he'd thought about this before. 

"You really are head over heels, aren't you?" Jamie said. 

"You say that like it's a bad thing. Frankly, I don't understand why you're not bothered by not being with him. Her," he corrected with a frown. "The Sirius in your universe. It's just weird to think that we're the same person but you don't care about that. I've been half in love with him from the moment we met, but you're busy chasing after Lily." 

"Not to take sides," Sirius said, "but you chased Lily for a while." 

"That is totally different. I chased Lily because I didn't know if you were bent. You might remember that I stopped the moment I found out." 

Sirius thought back and- bugger, yeah, James really had done that. "Huh. You're totally love struck with me." 

"It's my natural state of being," James said, nodding. "But whatever, let's deal with the tossers who've decided they're better apart." 

"We're not better apart," Girl-Sirius said, rolling her eyes. "We're just... not dating. It's not a big deal. Mates don't have to be shagging to be close." 

"Peter and Remus will be so relieved to hear that," Sirius said flatly. 

"Before we get back into time turner shite, can I kiss you?" Jamie asked, looking at Sirius. She had her arms crossed on top of the table and was leaning forward a little. 

Sirius glanced at James, who shrugged. It was just another version of James, and he wouldn't mind that. Would it even really count as kissing another person? Sure this version of James wasn't dating him, but it was James. "Sure." 

Jamie grinned. Merlin, she really did look so much like him. "Aces. Erm, not right this second though, because I don't want everyone to stare." 

"Everyone would include my boyfriend and your best mate; it's not like a big audience." 

"I don't know what blokes are like," Girl-Sirius said dryly, "but for girls, we don't watch our friends snog people." 

"Sounds like you could be having more fun," James said with a wink. "Relax, we'll figure out how to get you home, they'll kiss, and we'll all live happily ever after." 

"That's a very strange fairy tale," Jamie said. 

"Those are the best kind," Sirius said, smirking. 

[im-captain-basch]

I’m not sorry.

[protagonistheavy]

Wow there was actually way less of the True Colors ending that I had missed before than I realized... I thought that section in the mines was going to be a lot more involved, I thought that was the part I "missed" but I guess I... didn't miss anything lol.

So yeah like I said before... Unfortunately this game is extremely hollow beneath its colorful surface and potential. The writing is just... disappointing.

Spoilers sorry.

I think the critical problem with the writing is that it forced a twist villain -- when the game never needed a villain to begin with. The whole thing with Jed is just tacky and completely takes away from what the rest of the story had going on. The theme that Gabe in particular pushes is that "sometimes the world sucks and you have to move on" which is already a pretty weak message... but when you reflect on the story that Alex is going through, well, it isn't that the world sucks, it's that there's a really elaborate plot that hinges on one evil man.

And I've got to be honest. Why is Jed really so "evil" here lmao. I get it, he led his miners into bad dirt, it killed several people. But one... and maybe this is cruel for me to say, but that's mining, bro. That type of danger is kinda just a real threat! I'm not saying this takes away from Jed's mistake really, but I mean, shit, all we have to go on regarding the cave-in is that one man went up to Jed and said "maybe we should pull out" and Jed said "aw fuck it nothing has ever gone wrong before, let's just get the job done-- WHOOPS." It hardly feels like Jed is super at fault here... And him deciding to not go back and help the other miners, like, again... that's mining! I mean what was Jed gonna do, hold the cave open like in the Goonies while everyone else runs under him? I just... can't help but think that Jed, while certainly in the wrong for hiding the truth, isn't really that evil of a dude JUST for this circumstance.

He only truly becomes evil when he begins fucking killing someone over it. Killing someone in the DUMBEST way possible -- by taking his victim to the EXACT MINE SHAFT that Typhon wanted to bury, which they wanted to bury because... it's about to be FEDERALLY INSPECTED. What a great place to go and hide a body, Jed, in the exact place you KNOW people are going to be looking in. Seriously, did I miss some info here? It just feels so dumb for Jed to kill Alex here, not to mention the fact that Jed has NO REASON to kill Alex! Other than that she knows some shit about Typhon, but CLEARLY not enough to know everything -- and it's so unlikely that she was going to win in this case against Typhon anyway! So, for what fucking reason does Jed have to suddenly decide to take her RIGHT TO THE EVIDENCE OF THE MISTAKE HE'S TRYING TO HIDE...... SO THAT HE CAN KILL HER, RIGHT BEFORE THE INSPECTION? It's soooooo dumb, it's designed this way JUST to be dramatic.

Jed didnt have to be made into a villain at all in this game. His involvement could have just ended at being the lead Helldiver responsible for the cave-in -- no weird murderness needed. I dont quite understand why Typhon felt the need to cover this up so badly anyway, I mean, what did they even "cover up?" Clearly people still know about the cave-in, people still died... Are they really doing all this just to cover Jed's ass for some reason? Just so they can have some slightly-better publicity? I cant explain fully just how disappointing of a concept Typhon is, this organization that gets so hyped up by everyone... only for it to do nothing of impact. We never see a demonstration of their influence, we never feel their presence, it's only ever just people SAYING we should be scared rather than giving us reason. Whats the most fucked up thing we see Typhon really do? Accuse Alex of stealing? ... Which she did in fact do?

I dont think True Colors needed a villain -- not Jed, not Typhon. I think the game would have been much better if it was just about a small town responding to a tragedy, a tragedy without scheming actors all part of a grand conspiracy. I like episode three because it's an event that shows off the charm of Haven and amplifies the experience with normal, human emotions. But everything involving Typhon, that stupid usb, Jed, it's all just convoluted drama added for the sake of surprising viewers with an unnecessary twist. ANYONE could have been the twist villain here if they wanted to write it that way, even Eleanor lmao. It's shallow and only besmirches the game's best quality, which is that Haven is this awesome place to experience, rich with details to soak into. It overtakes the relatable human elements of the plot with this hyper-specific drama, that an orphan would reconnect with her brother just before he dies in an accident that was meant to cover up the accident that killed their dead. Lmao it's just, a pretty ridiculous story.

I think thats my last thoughts on True Colors. Very cute story with lots else to like; I enjoy the romantic arcs and how they're worked into the story, I love the setting and love the characters. But you only get to enjoy those aspects for like, a few hours before the game gets overly dark because, well, it decided it HAS to get overly dark and thus holds your hand through a "mystery" that's actually just a bunch of traumatic experiences linked together. If taking True Colors at its worst, you can even say that all their inclusion about mental health, trauma, emotions is all just sorta fetishized for the sake of building up a wacky story. A wacky story that, I cant stress enough, was designed the way it was JUST for the sake of surprising you about who is actually evil.