#this was so fun 2 write n i am sad its over

[cherryrikis]

ONE LESS LONELY GIRL - 014 ! im one less lonely girl

PAIRING idols riki x fem reader

SYNOPSIS fans always point out the chemistry between you and riki, and it only continues to grow after you become mc’s together on music bank. but as your feelings rise, so does the tension. and people begin to notice, so you try not to let riki know how you feel. but unbeknownst to you, he feels entirely the same way.

authors note so thats a wrap! just like that, its over. this is technically the last official part bc ep15 is more like an epilogue/can be read as a standalone, but its still just as meaningful to the plot. i had so much fun writing this and i gained so much support and so many new moots. i love you all and thank you for staying here even though i struggled to update while juggling school and work. 💗

previous <> masterlist <> next

“i’m so sad to announce that today will be our last show together, as our contract has reached its end.” you read off the script, lightly patting your waterline with the pad of your pointer finger.

“but, i hope this won’t be the last time we see each other. i am very thankful for this opportunity.” riki spoke as he looked into the camera lens, before moving closer to link his arm with yours.

“this was newjeans’ y/n,” “and this was enhypen’s ni-ki! please look forward to our future projects. we may no longer mc together, but we will forever be a couple together. thank you everyone!”

the cameras stopped rolling, and the red light turned off which signaled the recording was over.

staff and crew rushed to the both of you, so you were immediately bombarded with baskets of fruit, chocolates, snd two flower bouquets.

“this is for a good few months of connecting together. thank you for your hard work and dedication.” the head of the staff greeted, as his assistants handed out your gifts.

“thank you sir. we look forward to seeing more of you in the future!” the two of you bowed, before leaving to head backstage.

“dani said she’s gonna come with everyone else to pick us up. they want to get dinner at that chicken spot to celebrate our contract ending.” you informed riki, turning to show the texts in the group chat as he finished changing out his stage outfit.

hyein! - ‘congrats, you’re free from the chains music bank had you bounded into!🥳🎉’

danii 💗 - ‘me and enjeans are gonna get u guys from work so we can get chicken. great job on mubank :)’

riki chuckled, before handing your phone back to you. “sunghoon and heeseung are gonna get so drunk. so, beware.” he emphasized.

“no worries. im stuck with you anyway.” you sighed, gently punching his shoulder.

“here’s to riki and y/n, for finally being free from kbs! i hope none of us ever have to mc again.” sunghoon toasted as he raised his glass, after jake poured everyone shots.

“for real. we barely saw you guys while you were signed to that contract.” minji nudged your shoulder.

hyein burst out laughing, almost spilling the drinks scattered around her place at the table. “if you guys weren’t dating, y/n would’ve been sobbing because she’d never see you again!”

“is.. is she, drunk?” sunoo raised a brow, gently pulling hyein’s hood over her head.

“sunoo! she’s underage! all i got her were 2 shirley temples.” danielle gasped.

“okay! enough. we’re in public.” riki announced. “baby? go ahead my love.” he gestured sweetly for you to make your speech.

“thanks ‘ki.” you smiled. “i’m pretty happy our managers decided to let us have a joint interview that day. if we didn’t, me and riki probably would’ve never met. so, i’m glad music bank happened. otherwise, i couldn’t call this kid here my boyfriend.” you spoke, moving to wrap your arms around riki in a soft hug.

“cheers!” everyone exclaimed in awe.

as your group members around you yelled out congratulatory speeches, all riki could think about was you.

because now that you could be in his arms in public with no repercussions, that was all that mattered.

you looked at him with a bright smile, and riki could feel his heart melt as your expression.

the world had one less lonely girl.

TAGLIST (italics = couldnt be tagged) @hannicorpse @luvvhaerin @chaevibes @en-verse @ren2jay @choppedballoondetective @heartheejake @imanalien143 @istglevi-gotmesimping @yndairy @eleanorheartschishiya @lonelylandofan @gweoriz @jaemified @onlyhyunjin @softpia @frecklesbrownies @riksaes @wensurr @rikifordmiami @brideslit @ant-onie @yumilovesloona @aeminju @hoonics @catecita @clampclover @rei4sunoo @addictedtohobi @rikidaze @baekxo07 @xotyla @melancholy-z @rikisgeef @jung1w0n @tocupid @onlyseung @i03jae @iheartshopping @istphanie @queenriki7 @academiq @1117promises @nctislifue @haechansbbg @rairaiblog @nabia-bia @pkjay @lixiebokie @hiekoo @r1kizerr @d-dilemma @kingofthekards @iilwji @hoonatic @woorcve @enhaz1

[tyunni]

🦢̼ࣳ 10:36ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ( you're just a warm body to hold , at night when i'm feeling all alone )

Genre (𝐈): heeseung x fem!reader , angst , exes 2 nothing. Warnings (𝐈𝐈): toxic relationship , y/n is overly obsessed with heeseung , mentions of somewhat making out? not properly proofread so there might be grammar mistakes ! Word Count (𝐈𝐈𝐈): 1k+;

𝒜uthors note: 2 may posts in a row is absolutely mind boggling! this is for @jlheon 's bea event, very fun to write! (i'm not quite sure if I'm past the due date, if i am just consider this a normal drabble! today is my last exam so i was busy all day yesterday ㅠㅠ)

Laying in your bed at 10:36 PM, your eyes brimmed to the top with hot tears that feel almost as heavy resting atop your bottom eyelashes as the feeling of your sinking heart is when you finally realize that love is, indeed, pain.

You think about him. He and his beautiful, round, chocolate eyes that once looked at you so curiously despite the bags under weighing them down, how his slanted nose turned red when the cold air hit his face, how soft he felt under your fingertips when you traced each and every one of his features. Back then you felt as though every dent and imperfection in your fingerprints fit perfectly against the texture of his skin, connecting like puzzle pieces every time you stopped the motion of your wrists and rested your palm against his cheek, your own curious eyes greedily taking in every little detail about the boy in front of you. His ravishing, charming smile that would make its way onto his face when he caught you admiring the shape of his lips was far too alluring for you to notice the slight twitch of his eyebrows, a saddened expression replacing the one of mischief and genuine desire of fun.

That’s all you were to him, fun. But to you, he was everything. The way he would smile against your skin, his big hands resting on the small of your back as his guidance towards his lap ended victoriously, with you situating yourself on his thighs and giggling at the ticklish feeling of his dark locks dancing against your sensitive neck. The thought of that, back when Heeseung was still yours, usually made your heart flutter and your knees go weak, but now that it’s nothing but a memory, the same butterflies that would roam around your stomach happily now gnaw at the enclosure and slowly climb up your throat, your palm swiftly slapping against your mouth to stop them from escaping. Dizziness and nausea came naturally after your mind would get flooded with the thoughts of Heeseung, you felt every symptom of food poisoning in the wake of swallowing Heeseung’s rotten heart with a proud smile on your face. You felt sick, love sick.

After an hour of laying in bed, trying to drown your sorrows with your own tears, you decide to call him. The past month you had had your ex, if you could even call him that, on dial almost every night, his warm embrace like a drug you couldn’t get enough of. Your shakey digits press against the numbers on your screen, and with just one click you were officially crawling right back to him. Heeseung decline your call, which means he’s on his way to you, again. You need him, again. He’ll come over and lull you to sleep with his soft touches, again. Next morning you’re going to wake up to an empty bed and pretend this never happened, again.

After a while you can hear the creaking of your door, indicating Heeseung has entered your room and has returned to you.

“y/n,” you feel your bed sink as he sits right beside your balled-up form, letting out a deep sigh at the all too familiar situation. “We can’t keep doing this, y/n.”

He had said those exact words the night before, and the night before that too, but this time it feels different. This time you know he’s right.

“I know…” your croaky voice seems to be only tugging at your own heartstrings this time, only you feel sorry for yourself. Sorry for the sad, depressing joke of a human you had become after corrupting and molding yourself into nothing but a heart that beats for another, lungs that breathe for someone else, and a mind that slaves away only thinking about one person.

Heeseung kicks his shoes off, climbing into your sheets, body facing you, “this is the last time, okay?” his finger finds its way under your chin, tilting it upwards for you to face him. You look into his eyes, you see nothing. It’s empty, he has lost all feelings for you, even the feeling of pity that you were so desperately clinging onto, disgusted with the shell of a person you had become in the process. You had lost him, completely this time.

“‘Kay…” you sigh, the breath you let out a mixture of relief and sadness as you sink into his arms and feel your skin bleed into his own for the last time. For once, you don’t melt under his touch, for the little warmth he secretly held for you has now completely evaporated and instead replaced itself with the ice-cold wall he had put up between you two despite your bodies remaining pressed up against each other.

He kisses the crown of your head, leaving a light peck on your forehead right after. “Goodnight, y/n…”

You look up at him slightly, The lovey-dovey nicknames he once called you had completely left his vocabulary tonight, instead your name fell past his once-red lips that seemed to have turned blue under the low illuminance of your nightlight. You feel alone, even with the one you desire right in front of you. His arms wrapped around you hold no weight to them, only your blanket keeping your body warm. Yet you still hold on. You clutch onto him dearly, sobbing into his chest, your hands that had the hem of his t-shirt balled up into a fist now roam around his back as you pull yourself impossibly closer to him, your lips find their way towards Heeseung’s to capture them for the last time, desperately swiping your tongue against his lower lip for him to let you in and dance his tongue against yours, but he doesn’t.

And now you know, you understand, that you’re holding onto a pale, ghostly, blue corpse.

You pull away from him after you feel his almost bony fingers gently stroke your hair. He shushes you, pulling you closer to him and humming a soft melody that can only be described as the requiem of your love, with no one but you to adorn yourself with the color black, cry and pray for it, and watch its casket get buried six feet underground.

©tyunni please don't copy, translate or repost any of my work!

[redheadspark]

Hi, this is first time I am asking someone for a story, but your prompts are so fun... Well my request is for Benedict and can you pla make a combo of prompt #2 & #19 (did you know its going to be this hot, write it to confirm 😅) and when its about Benedict it will be fun to read something smuty 😉

Hope I am not being very demanding ... Thanks in advance 💮

A/N - This was great to write, I hope you enjoy it! Thanks for the request!

Distract

Summary - Benedict knows how to distract you, even on a hot day

Warnings - Just fluff and a HINT of steam ;)

“Are you sure all the windows are open, dear?”

“Trust me, darling.  I have every single window open in attempts to give us some relief with the breeze,” 

You hummed, using the fan as much as you could as your husband, Benedict Bridgerton, was working away at his canvas and trying his best to finish the latest piece he was working on for a month.  You loved watching him work, it was a peaceful time when you two would be in his art studio while you would be working on your correspondence and Benedict was painting.  It was what you two would do every Sunday before you would have to start your hectic weekly schedules again. 

You’ve been married to Benedict for almost 5 years now, you two have known each other since you were young and were madly in love with one another in your teens.  Of course, you both had to wait until you both were old enough for Benedict to properly court you, then propose to you.  It was rather silly since you both knew even as early teens that you would be married to each other for all of your lives.  It was also a perk that your families were close friends, both sets of parents were already inwardly planning on your courtship when they saw the spark between the pair of you.  It was safe to say that his mother, the sweet and kind Violet Bridgerton, was beyond happy to gain another daughter in her household and with her name.

You were glad too.

Having a small apartment in the Bridgerton Estate was an immense blessing, having new siblings to get to know and be social with, your own space to share with Benedict, and simply have your time as a wife with him.  He was beyond an amazing husband, making things light in diet times, knowing when to make you laugh when you were sad or simply hold you when you needed physical contact.  You both had flaws, but talking through them together as a team made it all worthwhile.  

But now there was a minor heat wave that came through the area, and even the massive Bridgerton estate would not bring any relief that would help you anytime soon.  

“Did you know it was going to be this hot today?” You asked nonchalantly as you were scanning the stack of envelopes on the desk for you to peer through.

“I wish I did, then we would have planned a better outing,” Benedict answered.  

“Perhaps we should have escaped to the lake, like Kate and Anthony,” you hummed as you looked over another ball invitation while fanning yourself, Benedict chuckling from his spot at his easel while he was drawing a long stripe of blue on the canvas.

“I’d rather be in an audience of their…love for one another,” Benedict replied with a snort, making you giggle as you looked over in his direction.  He was still dressed somewhat formally, you both coming back from a luncheon with your mother-in-law.  His blue coat and undershirt brought out the shine in his eyes and the flushness in his cheeks, making him look even more enchanting than ever.  

Every once in a while you would get lost in his appearance: whether he was working deep on a piece of art and his skin was stained in ink or charcoal, or even when you two were chatting during dinner and he was ranting about a family story.  He had a way with you, a way to make you lose your train of thought or make time stand still.  

“Darling?”

You blinked, seeing that Benedict stopped his painting and was watching you with a hint of concern, “Are you well?”

You smiled and blinked slowly, placing your fan on the desk and resting a hand on your cheek as you tilted your head at him, “More than well, since I get a marvelous view of my husband being a marvelous artist,”

Benedict grinned, the smirk he showed you was enough to make your stomach flip.  You knew that look, something reserved for the pair of you out of the public eye.  He may have Benn posted as a gentleman when it came to his name and how to conduct himself, but it was a different scenario when you two were alone.  He knew how to make you cave from a simple look or sweet talk.  Benedict has always been a flirt, before you got together and then after.  But most of the time you were the object of his flirtations.  

Which you would never object to.

“Just marvelous? Oh, you wound me,” He replied, you ruling your eyes as he continued, “The words I would use for my wife would be far more expressive,”

“Oh would they?” You asked, taking the bait that he was dangling for you.  Benedict could only smile, placing the paint brush on the easel before he walked over towards you.  He went around the desk, his eyes still drilling into yours with a signature smile as his fingers traced along the top of the dress, almost making a mess of your letter pile while he was getting closer to you.  It felt like you were frozen in your spot in the chair, your fan staying still in your hand, Benedict reaching over to take the fan from your hand delicately.

“Divine…exquisite…intelligent….kind….angelic….” He laced every word with love and affection, inching closer and closer to you as he was now perched on the top of the desk, his eyes twinkled in the sunlight and your breath was lost in your throat.  You felt every single one of those words hit you along your chest, making you feel so loved and almost as light as air.  

As soon as he was close enough to have his lips brush against yours, you felt your stomach summersault as he eyed your lips for the briefest of moments.  

“Just to name a few,” He whispered, you eyeing his lips in return as you finally grinned widely at you.

You dived in, kissing him deeply as he was perched over you on the desk.  You both kissed, leaning into each other smoothly and with no hesitation while it felt like you couldn’t get closer than ever before.  This was nothing new for you two, especially when it came to the throws of love.  Benedict was an amazing lover, knowing which buttons to push and where to touch you with both his lips and hands.  There was never a dull moment with your husband when it came to pleasure, and he would surprise you in the best way possible.

“Take off your jacket, the hell?” You huffed against his lips as you reached to push his blue jacket off.  Benedict laughed, kissing you deeply as he threw off the jacket to toss it to the floor you spoke again, “You’re making me hot just by looking at you,”

“Just by my looks?” Benedict asked in a breath, you laughing as he reached to undo a bit of your dress with his nimble and skilled fingers, “I must be lacking then.  Perhaps I should brush up a bit more,”

“Yes you must,” You hummed in return, almost in a growl.  You both let the rest of the world slip away, just like your dress slipping to the floor as well as his trousers.  

That hot day was bearable after all. 

The End

July Prompt Session

[mixelation]

How about... Akatsuki partner ships ranked? 👀

yeah okay. worst to best

6. Pein/Konan - Look, they have the devotion thing down. You want angst? They have angst, and also a vaguely punk rock aesthetic that seems like it shouldn't exist in universe, which is at least visually interesting. However, Kishimoto forgot to give either of them personalities. They both appear to be the same flavor of Mildly Morose. You would think being leaders of a terrorist organization aiming to end the world's magical military forces via snatching up all the weapons of mass destruction for themselves would make for an interesting power couple, but it just..... doesn't? This ship is bereft of content because even the most versatile shippers don't know what to do with it.

5. Kisame/Itachi - Listen, I know this one will be controversial. I know this one has some very dedicated fans. And I am here to inform those fans that this ship is boring. Look. You just have to accept it. It's okay. Do you know how much MinaKushi I write? I'm not judging you. Sometimes you just want something boring and unchallenging. Their canon dynamic is largely Kisame just doing whatever Itachi wants, and fans are usually too cowardly to let Itachi act insane enough for the dynamic to be interesting. This ship is for people who think black pepper is spicy.

4. Orochimaru/Sasori - I wanted to rank this one higher. Do you know how potentially insane this ship is? Do you understand? Do you know how many nonconsensual surgeries of third parties this ship involves? The stolen bones? The crimes against humanity? The fall out and betrayal and obsession? This should be the greatest, most insane ship of all time. But I've read how it's written. This ship will only disappoint you. Only pain lies here.

3. Tobi/Deidara - This one also seems like it should make for a deeply insane ship, and yet is rarely delivered on. Their canon dynamic is fun, and also its implications turn completely mind-blowingly bonkers post identity reveal. Like what is Obito even doing here? I can only assume his crush on Deidara was just strong enough he got distracted from taking over the world for like six months in order to harass him. Cannot rank higher because fanon Obito is too annoying to read for more than a couple thousand words, and people who ship Deidara with men keep turning him into a sad little uwu bean. You will find some fun things, but also you will find the most annoying OOC content on the planet.

2. Kakuzu/Hidan - They! Are! Married! Bizarrely, the pair that have the most cooperative and supportive on-screen dynamic, which gets them to second place. Unfortunately fans think Kakuzu's entire personality is scamming people for money, and not even in a fun Ed Edd n Eddy way. Also Hidan is usually just like. Protestant with extra steps. How did this happen? We don't know. Fortunately there's a least a small amount of good content out there for them and their married life. They're happy. Hundreds are dead, but they are having a good time.

1.Sasori/Deidara - Genuinely confused about how this one won first. Like I like this ship, okay. It just seems like it shouldn't be number one, and yet here it is. They have a well-established canon dynamic that's a little bit spicy but also leaves room for cooperation. They're both small pretty boys so fans are less determined to sort them into the gender binary of "dark chuckling sex god" and "sad precious uwu bean." There's a wealth of content that doesn't suck and even maybe sometimes gets a little interesting. You will have to read the most cardboard, unnuanced dialogue about art, but it's not like canon was churning out high quality dialogue there either.

[atlabeth]

between colleagues - anthony lockwood

part 2

summary: besides, what's a bit of fake dating between colleagues anyway?

a/n: i have missed him!!! there is just something so fun about writing for l&co and anthony specifically i truly love their world and i love him!! this was originally going to be the entire thing in one fic but i decided to post this on its own and test the waters with you all because i am TIREd of writing long fics. free me from my prison. this is literally my third fake-dating fic bc i never get tired of the trope but lmk if you want to see more

wc: 3.1k

warning(s): fem!reader, mentions of: canon typical job stuff, a child dying (mentioned in passing. literally half a line), and a good ol fashioned breakdown. but this is almost completely fluff bc that's all in the background

You groaned as Lockwood pushed the door open, working through the knot in your shoulder while you all walked inside. You tossed your rapier into the umbrella stand, not even bothered by the clatter, and began unbuckling your belt. 

Winter was the worst season for ghost hunting. As if it weren’t already freezing enough dealing with Visitors and their effects, your most recent job was almost fully outside. You considered it a miracle hypothermia didn’t get you before any sort of ghost-touch.

“What are you groaning about?” Lockwood asked, glancing back at you. “I think tonight went rather well.” 

He’d removed his jacket, and his white undershirt was dirt-stained and damp with sweat. Though he looked unaffected as ever on the surface, the quickened rise and fall of his chest said, in his own way, he was just as exhausted as the rest of you. You raised an eyebrow, but Lucy beat you to the punch. 

“You think every night goes well if we come back alive,” she said wryly. 

“It’s not the best measurement,” George added. He tilted the iron charm over the door back into place then set his bag on the floor. “Tonight was rough, Lockwood. Even by your ridiculous terms.” 

Lockwood looked at you. “Anything you care to add?” 

You grimaced as you rubbed your shoulder. “I’m never breaking down a door for you like this again.” 

You did feel a bit like an action hero in the moment, but you regretted it soon after. Even more so when it didn’t even matter in the scheme of things—the source ended up being buried by the locked shed, not in the shed itself. At least you were now last in the rotation of opening suspicious doors. 

“You offered to,” Lockwood defended.  

“Because you said you would handle all the supply calls for the next week,” you said dryly. “And it looks like that may need to happen soon.” You held up your belt—once packed with salt bombs and magnesium flares, you’d emptied it completely trying to save all your lives. It was a sad sight. 

He frowned. “Even the flares?” 

“Even the flares,” you said. 

“I’m all out of them too,” George said. “Surprised we didn’t start a full-on forest fire in the backyard.” 

“I thought those would last longer.” Lockwood’s frown deepened. “They were quite expensive.” 

“At least we got paid a fair bit,” Lucy said. “And we did indeed get away with our lives.” 

“Barely,” George grumbled, kicking off his boots. He tossed his rapier haphazardly to the side, not even bothering to deposit it into your umbrella stand, and dropped his belt on the ground, still boasting a whole two remaining salt bombs. Your lip curled at the trail of chaos. “I’m going to bed. No one bother me for at least fifteen hours.” 

Lucy smiled, shaking her head as he walked off. “Dramatic, but he’s got the right idea. I’ll see you all tomorrow.” 

“See you, Luce,” Lockwood said. 

“I’ll be quiet when I come in,” you assured, and she gave an appreciative nod. Lucy dropped a stack of envelopes on the kitchen table before she went upstairs—it was her job to pick up the mail, and you were honestly surprised she remembered after all this. 

“You’re not mad at me,” Lockwood said, glancing at you as he went over to pick up the mail, “are you?” 

“No,” you sighed, and you flopped onto the couch, “just dramatic. More so than George tonight.” 

He chuckled and leaned against the counter, making deft work of the envelopes as he sorted them into piles. One for the never-ending junkmail that graced your door, and four others for each of you. “Good. I can never handle you being mad at me.” 

A smile tugged at your lips as you stared up at the ceiling. “You’re off the hook this time, so don’t worry.” 

“And I appreciate your mercy immensely,” he said. Another glance over at you. “You look exhausted. Are you sure you don’t want to turn in?”

You shook your head. “Our post-job detox is the most important part of all this. I can hold out for another hour.”

It was hardly a detox, but it had grown to become a necessity for you and Lockwood, sitting together and talking through everything in the wee hours of the night. 

One extremely tough case left you reeling harder than usual—children always got to you, and the girl’s death was particularly grisly—and apparently, Lockwood could tell. 

It took a couple days of gentle prodding, but one night, after being completely out of it in the archives with him that day, you broke—completely. Full on sobbing. Wholly embarrassing to do so in front of your boss, especially when he, George, and Lucy didn’t seem half as affected by it all. 

It turned out he was just better at covering it all up—Lockwood understood it all a lot better than you thought. He just sat with you in the living room and talked with you, talked you through it. There was a lot of crying, a fair bit of permanently swearing off ghost-hunting, and more than a bit of hatred against the entirety of the United Kingdom. 

By the end of it, though, after you’d cried yourself into a headache, gone through a quarter of a box of tissues, and actually worked out your problems with Lockwood’s help, you felt far better. 

Lockwood thereby forbade you from holding in your feelings until they burst, and so it became a routine—it was cheaper than therapy, and most therapists, save for the few former agents working in the field, couldn’t understand it anyways. You usually slumped on the couch, Lockwood usually leaning against the counter. Sometimes with tea, often with tears, always with slightly morbid jokes. 

“How’s your shoulder feeling?” Lockwood asked, snapping you out of your thoughts. 

“It’ll heal,” you said. “It’s mostly just sore. I’ll stay away from my rapier for a few days, sleep on my other side for once, and everything’ll be fine.” 

“Good.” The ruffling of paper stopped for a moment, and his voice was slightly sheepish when he spoke again. “Are you still up for that meeting with the Caldecotts tomorrow, then?” 

You groaned and screwed your eyes shut. “Lockwood, it is three in the bloody morning. You scheduled the Caldecotts for eleven.” 

“I didn’t know that this job would go on for so long!” he defended. “The last few have all wrapped up before midnight. It’s not my fault this Visitor was particularly elusive.” 

“I am drenched in sweat, Lockwood,” you said. “Half of my coat is burnt from plasm and the other half is frozen solid. There is still dirt under my fingernails, my boots are covered in spiderwebs, and I haven’t slept in twenty-three hours. And you want me to be ready to deal with Lorena Caldecott, the most annoying woman I think I have ever met, in eight measly hours?” 

“Yes,” he said brightly. That just got another groan out of you. 

“They made you in a lab, Anthony Lockwood,” you mumbled. “That’s the only explanation for how you’re still going.” 

He chuckled. “Alright, alright. I’ll phone them first thing tomorrow morning—well, later this morning, I suppose—and see if I can push it back another day.” 

“And if not, you’re doing this on your own,” you said, finally opening your eyes again to see him walking over. He handed you your stack of mail—hardly a stack, really, only consisting of four envelopes—and smiled, irritatingly pretty even with smudges of dirt on his face. There was a reason he got away with so much, and that smile was half of it. 

Lockwood said your name cloyingly. “Come on. You know I do interviews best when we’re together. You keep me on track.” 

“I knocked down a door for you, Lockwood!” you proclaimed. “Is that not enough to get me out of this?” 

“I took the supply calls,” he said, “and I’m pushing back the meeting. We’re even now.” 

“Fine,” you said, extremely grudgingly. “But you’re getting them to push it back at least until tomorrow, because once my head hits the pillow, I don’t think I’ll be up for at least twenty-four hours.” 

“Promise,” he said with a nod. 

You sighed, finally righting yourself so you could look at your mail, and glanced up at Lockwood as you picked them up. “You get anything interesting?”

He shook his head. “Unless you consider a letter from Fittes begging me to buy the newest edition of their manual interesting.”

You hummed and looked back down at yours. You slipped your finger under the seal and tore it open, chuckling a bit when you took it out.

“How about you?” Lockwood asked.

“25% off my next Dorothy Perkins purchase,” you said, holding the coupon up. “Very thrilling.”

“Incredibly so,” he nodded. “When’s the last time you even got something from there?” 

You huffed a laugh as you worked open the next envelope. “I bought a dress for my cousin’s graduation last year. Haven’t worn it since.”

“So doubly thrilling,” he said. 

You’d opened your mouth to shoot back, but instead you frowned as you pulled an embossed card out. You skimmed through it quickly enough but got the meaning all the same. 

“Huh,” you said. “My cousin is getting married.” 

Lockwood raised an eyebrow. “Dorothy Perkins cousin?”

You shook your head, still frowning. “No. Maternal aunt’s son. Dorothy Perkins was paternal aunt’s son.”

“Ah,” he said dryly, “how could I have made such a mistake?”

You didn’t even have the energy to retort back as you stared at the letter. “I suppose I’ll need to pull out that dress again. It’s an invite.”

“Congratulations,” Lockwood said. “Are you going to need time off?”

“I don’t even know if I should go,” you mumbled, leaning your head against the side of the couch. 

“Why wouldn’t you go?” he asked with a frown. 

“Because I haven’t seen my family in a while,” you said, “and I haven’t seen this side of the family in an even longer while.” 

Lockwood shrugged. “Then it’ll be a nice reunion.” 

“Lockwood,” you said, “I’ve lied to them.”

“…Okay,” he said slowly. “About what?”

You winced. “They think I have a boyfriend.” 

He still seemed lost. “Strange thing to lie about.”

“You don’t understand.” You sat up, putting the letter to the side. “My family’s from Liverpool, right? We’re all so busy that we never really have time to meet up, but I make it a point to call my mother a few times a month so she knows I’m still alive.” 

Lockwood nodded. “Yeah, I know. You usually call her after every rough case.” 

“Right. Because my mum hates my career,” you said. “I thought she was going to have a heart attack when I told her I’d scored my first job with Tendy’s. I thought she would actually pass away when I told her I quit Tendy’s for you.” You glanced at Lockwood. “She thinks you’re a lunatic, by the way.” 

He shrugged. “Many do.” 

You smiled and shook your head. “She hates that I’m an agent, but so long as I stay alive, she says she can deal with it. But she has a rule on our calls that I can’t talk about our jobs—says they give her nightmares. So instead, she talks about every facet of my personal life.” 

Lockwood’s eyes finally flashed with understanding and he nodded. “Hence the boyfriend lie?” 

“Hence the boyfriend lie,” you echoed. “She will not stop bothering me about it—apparently the dating life of her daughter is more important than anything else. So on our last call, I just lied and told her I had one to get her off of my back.”

Lockwood actually had the nerve to laugh. “And how did that work out for you?”

“It worked fine,” you said, “and it was going to continue to be fine. But then Will had to go out and get engaged, the dolt.”

“So just go on your own,” he suggested. 

“I can’t show up alone,” you grumbled. “Not only would it be completely embarrassing, but the questions would start up all over again.” 

“Then don’t go.” 

“I can’t not go!” you exclaimed. “Will’s a lovely cousin.” 

“You just called him a dolt,” Lockwood said. 

“I call you a dolt all the time,” you said. “Doesn’t mean I don’t like you.” 

Lockwood chuckled and shook his head, and that was when an idea came to you. There was a slight furrow in his brow when he glanced back at you. 

“I don’t like that look.” 

“Come to the wedding with me,” you said suddenly. 

Lockwood’s expression sobered even further. “You can’t be serious.” 

“It’s the perfect solution!” you exclaimed, moving to the edge of the couch as you clasped your hands together. 

“You want me to be your pretend boyfriend,” he deadpanned. When you nodded, he shook his head in disbelief. “You’ve got to be joking.”

“Why would I be joking?” you asked. “You’re quite possibly the best candidate for it all. We’re best friends, we know each other well— God, I’ve talked about you enough in general to my mum that she won’t even be surprised that it ended up being you.” 

Lockwood’s eyebrows rose. “Won’t they look down on you dating your boss?” 

“You’re hardly my boss,” you said. 

“I pay your salary,” he said. “You live in my house. My name is on the door.” 

“I don’t see how that’s relevant,” you said. “Besides, you owe me after tonight!” 

He frowned. “We just agreed that we were even.” 

“Well, I lied,” you said. “My shoulder is in excruciating pain from knocking that door down, and the only way for it to heal is for you to pretend to be my boyfriend.” 

He gave you a wry look and said your name. “Come on. This is an awful idea.” 

“It’s a brilliant idea,” you said. “You get a chance to dress up and charm an entire family—you live for that sort of stuff, Lockwood. I finally get my family off my back with some actual proof and I actually get a break for once.” 

You saw the uncertainty on his face and you huffed. “Don’t give me that look. This is the exact sort of plan you’d come up with and try to force on me if it meant we’d get a hand up.” 

“I know,” he said grudgingly, “that’s why I don’t like it. It’s dangerous when you start learning my tricks.” 

“Please, Lockwood,” you begged. “I’ll do all your chores for the rest of the month. I’ll shake Lorena Caldecott’s hand with a smile on my face.”

“That is tempting,” he said wryly. “I can never fold my dress shirts the way you do.”

“Wrinkle-free dress shirts,” you said with a gesture. “And— and, I will cash in my favor with Arif. Discounted doughnuts for the next three months.”

Lockwood’s eyes widened. “You’ve got favors with Arif?”

You shrugged. “I helped him out a couple times with ghost things.”

He huffed a laugh and shook his head. “You really are something.”

“Discounted doughnuts, Lockwood,” you continued. “Discounted doughnuts and wrinkle-free shirts and my best behavior for the Caldecotts, no matter how sleep-deprived I am.”

“…This really means a lot to you,” Lockwood said after a moment, “doesn’t it.”

You nodded. “My family— my mum—will never lay off if I show up alone. If you’re on my arm, you talk a bit about yourself and compliment me a few times and charm them with literal ghost stories, then I’m off the hook for good.”

Lockwood pursed his lips, his arms folded across his chest as he thought it through. 

“Please,” you said. “It’ll just be one night.”

After another moment, he let out a sigh almost as dramatic as your earlier ones, but his lips quirked up at the corners.

“Fine,” Lockwood said. “I’ll go with you.” 

Your eyes widened. “You will?” 

“Yes,” he said with a laugh. “It— it’ll be fine—you’re right. We’ve been living together for the past year and a half—we know each other well enough to sell it. And with half the agency going out for it, I can write off any hotels or dinners as business expenses.” 

That got a laugh out of you too, and you shook your head. “You are my savior, Lockwood. Truly.” 

“Just means we’re back in your court on favors,” he joked. “And you know what? I think this could actually be fun.” 

“Really?” 

“Really,” he nodded. “Besides,” Lockwood smiled wryly at you as he stood up from his spot against the counter, “what’s a bit of fake dating between colleagues anyway?”

You huffed a laugh and finally managed to pull yourself back up into a sitting position. You cracked your neck and rubbed your shoulder, grimacing a bit at the soreness but thankful that it wasn’t worse. “Can we work out the rest of the details later? I’m exhausted, and I know you’ve got to be running on fumes.” 

His smile softened and he nodded. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Later today, I suppose.” He frowned as he looked at the clock. “God. It really is late.” 

You hummed in agreement as you unlaced your boots, trying your best to avoid the spiderwebs when you took them off. That was your number one question about the Problem—why the hell did spiders have to gravitate towards ghosts? 

“Get some sleep, Lockwood,” you said, setting your boots with everyone else’s shoes. That mess was an issue for another day. “You’ve got to be refreshed—those supply calls aren’t going to make themselves.” 

Lockwood rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t completely bite back his smile. “Best behavior for the Caldecotts, love.” 

“And nothing less!” you exclaimed without turning around, pointing in the air as you continued up the stairs. You heard Lockwood laugh behind you, and the sound brought out a smile of your own. 

It was now nearly four in the bloody morning. Your shoulder still ached, your coat was beyond repair, and you would have to scrub beneath your nails for at least ten minutes before you settled in tonight. But somehow, Lockwood still had you smiling and feeling better about the whole experience. 

For god’s sake, you fought ghosts on a daily basis. You’d been training with a rapier since the tender age of eight. Your skills rivaled some of Fittes’ and Rotwell’s best—who cared what your family had to say about you? 

You were right. This wedding would be a piece of cake with Anthony Lockwood by your side.

[raainberry]

Don’t Go

« silly series - 2 »

Yeji x gn!reader

Fluff

synopsis - just Yeji being a little clingy and a little tease

wordcount - 735

T/W - the gym (?)

A/N - im starting something called silly series for random fluff drabbles. im willing to write about any idol for these so if you have a request feel free to send an ask, let’s all be silly together🤭 and yes its another yeji fluff, i saw a tiktok what else was i supposed to do, im just a girl

As soon as the ending credits started rolling, you sat yourself up, accidentally dragging your girlfriend along as she had been resting her head on your shoulder.

Your own forgetfulness amused you, but Yeji whined at the sudden movement. She was too comfortable, and this was too disruptive and inconvenient for a lazy day.

“I’m sorry.” You giggled. “But I really have to go to the gym, Yeji.”

“No, you don’t. Just one more episode, come on!” She bartered, clinging onto your shirt.

“That’s what you said for the last three, I really have to go now or else there’ll be too many people.” You declined, but it really was against your will.

She sighed, falling back into the place you’d been occupying on this couch. It didn’t feel as comfortable as it did when you were by her side.

You were used to her sulking, but it didn’t mean it became less amusing to watch. So you did chuckle before leaning down to kiss her. Thankfully she accepted your advance, allowing you to taste the strawberry milk that you’d just shared on those soft and sweet lips of hers.

“If I tell you not to go, will you not go?” She pouted at you, cupping your cheeks and looking into your eyes as she knew you rarely could say no to her that way.

“Nice try, but it won’t work this time.” You said, leaving a kiss on her forehead before running to grab your bag from the bedroom.

If you hadn’t, you were sure she’d have gotten you to lay back down in that blanket in no time. She’s done it more than you could count. You would have canceled today too, if only it wasn’t becoming critical. Your personal coach wasn’t too happy lately, and in good reason…

So, no, you weren’t going to give in today.

Although, you almost did when you heard her whining again from the couch.

“Y/n, don’t go!” Her voice echoed through your small studio apartment.

“Yeji, how else am I gonna look this good for you?” You answered, your laughter grabbing her attention as you made your way over to your shoes.

She stayed silent for a few seconds, pondering over your question. You felt her eyes all over you, and that’s how she decided it was worth the sacrifice.

Getting to admire a few of your defined muscles in exchange for a couple hours without you suddenly seemed like the bargain of the century.

“Fine, go.”

“Are you sure?” You giggled, tightening your laces.

“Just go.” She said, playfully shrugging you off. “But I won’t be here when you get back.”

She will. She just needed to tease you back, or else it wasn’t fair nor fun.

“Wait, actually?” You asked, already sad at the thought. You weren’t going to be able to see her for a few days after today, you didn’t want to say goodbye right away.

Yeji stayed silent, focusing on the TV to hold herself back from laughing. She could see you debating it all over again with yourself from the corner of her eye and it amused her. You tried not to show it, but it was obvious she was your biggest weakness.

Oh, how she loved it. It made her feel so loved. However, she didn’t like seeing you all worked up, so she eventually turned back to you.

“I’m not going anywhere, baby, relax.” She reassured you, seeing your features lighten up almost immediately.

“Mean.” You smiled, grabbing your bag from the floor.

“You love me!” She bragged as you made your way towards the door.

“I do, I love you so much.” You admitted over your shoulder.

You grabbed the handle and opened the front door before stopping in your tracks. Why didn’t she say it back?

You turned to face her, and found her smiling not so innocently, letting you know she was teasing you again.

“I love you too!” She said, making a heart with her hands over her own.

That got your heart racing among the warmth in your chest, and if that wasn’t enough, it pulled a laugh out of you as well. You found yourself hoping you made her as happy as she made you, although she’d assured you of it countless times by now.

You couldn’t help but not believe it at times, it felt surreal to have her the way she allowed you to. You probably won’t ever really believe it, but it was fine to you as long as it was true.

As long as that grin she sent you was genuine, you’ll forever have a reason to smile.

“I’ll be quick, I promise, see you later!”

[thecapricunt1616]

The Bear & His Honey ; Chapter 8 -

♡ Chapter Inspo: Lyrics - (TS) Slut! (1989TV!) ;  “You’re not sayin’ you’re in love with me, but you’re going to, half awake taking your chance it’s a big mistake, it might blow up in your pretty face I’m not saying do it anyway, but you’re going to”  ♡♡》》𝟙𝟠+ 𝕆ℕ𝕃𝕐 𝔽𝕀ℂ! ℕ𝕆 𝕄𝕀ℕ𝕆ℝ𝕊 𝔸𝕃𝕃𝕆𝕎𝔼𝔻《《♡♡ ♡ Summary: Carm + Winnie have an evening in together. They get wine drunk and have slightly spiritual talk over pizza. Winnie talks Carm through a nightmare. Carm gets some much needed rest, Some angsty sex ensues. ♡ W/C: 8,902 ♡ Posted Date: 02/20/24 ♡ A/N: (Kinda TL Don't have to read) Hayy besties!! I’ve been lookin' over the fic & judging what y'all like by the chapter likes- ok smut and Soft Dom Carm!! I’m leaning towards Soft Dom Carmy being the main trope for this fic & based on the likes y’all love it too!! He needs to build into it though for sure, Like- i'm not great at writing things close to canon- but what is canon is a pivotal part of what makes up Carmen - which is being severely emotionally underdeveloped in regards to relationships - also sexually. BUT don’t get me wrong- that man is a DOM he just needs a partner who will find that and pull it out of him. Like- y’all I am ALL for the fully anger management therapy version of Carmy tthat'swritten in to one shots here like I THIRST for it- I just want to try and flesh out the journey in between because I find it interesting. But it WILL happen in this fic- as you can tell this fic is a slow burn, its gonna be long, and I know its gonna end with Carmen being fully sexually comfortable (at least with Winnie) so expect some dirty dirty filth, carm is just growin rn okay!! I also find it fun to write kinda virgin! Carmy- I believe its canon he’s never had a gf- but I believe he’d had to have blown off steam some way in NY and hooking up on tinder since it was that time would be popular. Anyhow, enjoy this chapter!  ♡ Warnings for BTC: Minimally edited, talks of spiritualism, vomiting, talks of PTSD/Panic Attacks, Sad!Carm, Fluff, (Kinda asshole) But mostly insecure!Carm, Smut! (Talks of it- oral (m) , kissing, etc just slutty shit) 

➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡

➵ 𝐂𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐮𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 ♡

.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·.

The pizza had gotten there pretty quickly but considering the time of night, that was to be expected. Carmen had been sure to order Pepperoni with extra cheese per my request, and by the time the delivery driver had knocked on the door, we had already finished off my entire bottle of wine and I was in the kitchen opening another. He returns to where we had set up in the living room, putting the steaming pizza box on the coffee table. “No way- you need to finish that story, you can't just answer ‘why do you believe in angels’ with ‘I met a guy when I worked at Dunkin’ Donuts and we had breakfast every day until he died’ and that’s just… the end of the story,” he said and I laughed, coming back with 2 very full glasses of Rose and setting them down. 

“That is the whole story, you mean you want the long detailed version?” I set down the 2 paper plates and paper towel roll I was holding under my arm. “Yes.. Please- how was this man an angel?” he snorted, his face flush from the alcohol as I could easily assume mine was. “Okay… his name was Harold, he came in every day, and one day, well” I took a bite of my pizza. “Like I said - my parents, they were never married. My Mom was a twin, but her sister died when they were babies- anyhow” I took another bite, realizing he was listening intently.

“Um.. yeah..” I swallow “So, my dad like- wanted nothing to do with us really, I mean- we met him a few times but… we were just like I dunno, puppies or something? Like, my dad didn’t want us, but my mom was all religious- anyway… wait- what was I saying?” I asked and he started laughing, “Fuckin, Dunkin Donuts man, Harold?” He said and I nodded, catching my breath from laughing at my own drunk rambles. “Yess! Okay, so that's why- we had no money! And with Chris and all his appointments and everything, my mom had even less money, so when I was 14 I got a job to be able to buy stuff, so anyway, I was working a shift.” I took another bite of my pizza before a large sip of my wine.

“And the angel… flew in to buy his coffee?” he teased and I nudged him with my foot. “Shut up! He’s actually the coolest person ever just listen!” I said and he nodded, going in for his second slice of pizza. “I was working a shift, and this man comes in… he looked really sick and he was like ‘ oh can I get something to eat I don’t have any money’ or whatever so I didn’t have any money to spare obviously and so I got my manager thinking this is a huge fuckin’ company - yanno being an idiot teen - and my manager was like ‘oh sorry dude can’t help you’ and so…” I took another sip of my wine before continuing.

“I took my 4.25 that I was gonna use for lunch, I figured whatever, cause this dude needs it- he looked really sick, and that he needed to eat. and I remembered, my mom always said you do things when you can cause when the lord sends his angels to test you they aren't in a suit” I shrug and his eyebrows raised. “You gave him your lunch money?” he said and I shrugged “Mmhmm, anyway- not the point this is the point, Carm, so he leaves, right? Harold comes in, he gets his regular black coffee. Goes and sits down at one of the tables by himself, he drinks it all like he usually does, just watching- waiting almost, and before he goes to leave, he comes up to the counter, and guess what he does?” I asked and he shrugs, waiting for me to continue.

“He hands me, four fucking dollars, and twenty-five cents” I exaggerate each number and his eyes widen, “what the fuck” he muttered. “And I’m like ‘ Harold, why are you given’ me this?’ And he’s like ‘Oh I don’t know honey, I just figured you can use a pick me up today’ “ I took another bite of my pizza and he stopped chewing. “That… is fucking nuts,” he said and chuckled a bit and shook his head.

“And then, every day, we’d sit on my first break and he’d tell me stories about his life, the wars he’d been in, his daughters, his wife before she died, and when he stopped comin’ his daughter came in - she told me that he told her to tell me that he wasn’t doing well and that’s why he hadn’t been by- so I went and visited him in the hospital, got to say goodbye, he was so awesome, and he would do that sort of thing all the time- whenever someone needed something Harold was just… there ya know? It’s like God..or something sent him in at a different time every morning to help someone out even in the smallest ways, He was an angel” I said and Carm nodded, putting his plate down and finishing off his own wine. 

“Well, now that you didn’t make it sufferingly short, I see why you think that. I’d probably believe in angels too if somethin’ like that happened” He said and I dusted my hands over my empty plate before setting it down on the table. “So you’ve never had an experience like that?” He shrugged looking up while he thinks before shaking his head. 

“Nope. Maybe you’re just magical” he pokes my nose causing me to giggle. “I think you” I poke his nose back “are drunk, and we both need to go to bed. Cmon those blankets I put in the dryer went off a few minutes ago. Let's brush our teeth before they get cold” I got up and grabbed our glasses and he took the trash “At least let me help you a little” he said and I smiled. “Such the gentleman.” I teased and he followed me into the kitchen. 

I pointed to show him where the ziplocks were and put the cups in the dishwasher, taking the  box to the entryway and leaving it to bring to the recycling in the morning. “Oh uhhh…I sleep…with the um-“ I started “rain sounds?” He chuckled a bit, stretching his back. “Mmhmm…” I nodded. “So uh…is that ok?” I asked and he nods “no problem for me”

I turn around and head in the bathroom turning on the light “I assume you didn’t bring a toothbrush, or are we that close already?” I teased and he snorts. “No…I did not. Got an extra?” He asks and I open my bathroom closet “you’re in luck, Sadie’s soon to be sister in law is a dental hygienist” I pull out 2 from my thick stack Sadie had put on me when she came over since she had so many laying around her house. 

“Are you a green or blue boy?” I asked and he pouted playfully “no Spider-Man?” He jokes and I giggle. “Blue it is” I put the green one back and popped open the blue one, handing it to him and turning on the sink, wetting my pink electric toothbrush. I put on my anti-cavity toothpaste and handed it over to him, he did the same putting some on his brush. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll time you” I said and he raised his eyebrow “what?” He asked and I turned on my toothbrush, giving him a smug smile before popping the brush in my mouth. Every 30 seconds I mumbled ‘next quadrant!’ With a small smile until the 2 minutes was up, spitting my toothpaste out and brushing my tongue as he did the same before rinsing my mouth and shutting off the water. 

By the time we got in bed and shut the light off, Persephone had well found her spot between my legs, purring softly as she groomed herself for the night and I opened my phone, going to tik tok. Carm spoons me from behind, nuzzling his face in my shoulder with his arm wrapped around my waist. “What’re we watchin’ babe?” He mumbled and I smile. 

“My nightly dose of giggles” I said and scrolled down my for you page, stopping on a video from ‘Secret Brittany’ and my eyes locking on the screen. 

Okay guys, lock in alright? This is the plan - the military planning for the next 2-4 months of my life 

Carm lets out a snort in to my neck, his hand traveling up and down my ribs as he watches with me. 

I’m not going to move to Ireland- yet. I’m going to purchase bumble premium in Ireland, and I’m going to march with Irish men who want me - caveat, they want me, then, I’m going to move, and live my faerie dream 

I giggled, “me” I said quietly to myself and he pinches my waist gently causing me to giggle more “you?! You’re not goin’ anywhere I dunno’ what you’re talkin’ about” he held me tighter, nuzzling his nose deeper in to the crook of my neck. “Is someone whiny and jealous? I’m sure with my red hair and thick hips I’d have guys lining up for me” I teased and laced my fingers with his. 

He let out a bratty huff “I know that’s why you aren’t allowed to go” he muttered into my skin, causing me to smirk as I scrolled on to the next nonsense video. I gasped as I realized I had forgotten about getting to the next part of my absurd series about some woman divorcing her lying husband and looked up her account and Carm leans in a little closer. 

“Wait…” he muttered softly as I scroll through, trying to find the last video I left on. “Who the fuck did I marry…52 parts Winnie?!” He snorts and I giggle “Carmen- shut up, shhh your brain. Get engrossed.” I said and went all the way back to the first part and I glance down at him. 

“You know I’ve watched 23 parts but I’ll rewatch- cause you have to see this, and know-“ I lean in so our foreheads were touching and giggle a bit. “I’m scared” he said playfully causing me to laugh more. “Know Carmen -whatever your middle name is- Berzatto, I will always sniff out a lie- I will do my diligence- hear me?” I huff a laugh and he kisses my lips tenderly. 

“I would never dream of lying to you” he said honestly before continuing. “I may not tell you everything at once, but I’ll never misguide you, yeah?” He said softly and gently cups the back of my head with his warm hand. I nodded softly against him. “Yeah…” I whisper and kiss his forehead. “My middle names Anthony” he said with a small smile. “Mines - basic. Ok, Now listen to this bullshit” I giggle a bit and turn back around, hitting play. 

It was about 3 parts (30 minutes) of Carmen softly gasping, playing with the hem of my shirt in anticipation, and humming in confusion before I heard the first snore come from his lips. I hit pause on the video, putting on my rain asmr sounds on Spotify and gently plugged my phone in, setting my alarms before drifting off into a peaceful, relaxed sleep. 

.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·...·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·...·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..

I woke up to the sounds of violent retching in my bathroom, I rubbed my eyes, confused for a moment before remembering that Carmen had slept over. I padded out to the kitchen, opening the fridge and grabbing my brita jug, before opening my cabinet and grabbing one of the many different glasses that fit a bamboo lid and glass straw, this certain one adorned with cherries. I gently pushed the cup under the ice dispenser, letting a few cubes drop in before filling the cup with chilled water. 

I pushed the lid and straw on, popping the Brita back in the fridge before padding back to the bathroom, where I heard dry heaving from outside the slightly cracked door. “Carmy?” I mutter softly, pushing the door further open to see him crouched over the toilet, elbows supporting him as he gagged over the bowl. 

“S-sorry.” He muttered, coughing a bit before sitting up and trying to catch his breath. “No- no. Carmen, don’t apologize” I knelt down next to him, gently rubbing his back. “I’m not feeling sick.. so was it a nightmare?” I asked softly, extending the water to him. He sat back on the floor, extending his legs in front of him and sighing deeply. 

“I really didn’t mean t’wake you, Winnie. It’s fine…really they happen like every night” he mumbled, taking the glass from my hands. “I have them too! It’s ok, it's ok. S’just a bad dream” I said softly and gently brushed his curls off his forehead that were damp with sweat. He takes a big few gulps of water from the straw, sighing relieved before leaning back and resting on the cold tub. 

“Did you…did you wanna talk about it?” I sat next to him, pulling my knees to my chest and resting my cheek on my knee, glancing at him through the moonlight coming through the window. It was hard to see him without my glasses or contacts, but his striking blue eyes were still impossible to miss. “It’s…” he looked at his hands, holding the glass. “Stupid” he said finally. “So..so stupid. I used to..” he sighs, his head dropping back and eyes squeezing back in thought. 

“Throw up?” He said like a question, shaking his head quickly. “Like” he looked at me “before I’d…see my boss” in the dim light I could still see his cheeks reddening. I bit my lip gently, leaning over and hugging him silently, my head resting on his chest. “I’m sorry” I said softly and he sighed, setting his water glass down and curling his arm around my frame, rubbing gently. “No.. no that’s not- don’t feel bad” he said softly, his thumb rubbing soothing strokes in to the middle of my back. 

I gently shook my head against his chest. “Carmen…” I said softly. “This… this monster…” I said softly and looked up at him, cupping his cheek honestly. “He makes you sick Carmen…what…what he did to you- whatever he did…he creates a panic response in you, baby.” I rub my thumb along the stubble of his jaw that was already peaking out before first light. 

He swallows thickly, drinking in every word I was saying. “He…he…” I look at the floor, trying to find my words. “He instilled that voice in you” I said, my lip quivering slightly and he put his thumb to my lips gently to stop the motion. “What? What voice, honey?” He asked softly. 

I giggled into his finger, still slightly wine-drunk. “Your inner-saboteur. Just like Ru-Paul says” I gently nibble his finger, causing him to really laugh. “My inner-saboteur” he repeated with a smile. “Yes” I said gently and kissed his forehead. “Let him go, Carm, fuck that guy! Fuck your inner-saboteur. I’m still a tad bit drunk, but c’mon- brush your nasty throw-up teeth” I said teasingly and giggle, resting my forehead on his and gazing into his icy blue eyes. 

“And come back to bed, I’ll introduce you to Drag Race tomorrow”  I said softly, pecking his lips tenderly. “Okay?” I gaze into his eyes, looking for agreement. “Okay…” he said softly, a smirk adorning his lips. 

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I wake up to the feeling of Persephone jetting off my right thigh like an Olympic-launching pad at the sound of my alarm going off, soothing chirping birds filling the bedroom from my hatch alarm clock Sadie’s Parents had gotten me as a housewarming gift. I groan softly at the reverberating pain in my thigh muscle from her sudden attack, reaching down and soothing the ache with a slow rub from my hand. 

Carmen was draped around me, his arm tucked protectively around my waist and his prominent nose nuzzled in my neck, the feeling of short, hot breaths hitting my shoulder at an even pace. I gently leaned over, tapping the top of the clock that was slowly getting brighter, so it stopped its cry of awakening, 

I rubbed my face tiredly before I gently pried Carmys sleeping fingers off of my waist, slowly getting up off of the mattress, so as to not wake him. My t-shirt brushed just below my lower cheeks, goosebumps crawling up my legs from the chilly apartment air. I nuzzled my feet into my pink bear-claw slippers, and quietly shuffled out to the kitchen, silently pulling the bedroom door shut behind me.

 I sighed tiredly, stretching my back and arms just at the end of the hall, moaning softly at the blood rushing to my muscles at the action. “Mmhmm” I mumbled at Sephy hungry cries, scratching my scalp in a sleepy haze. 

“Comin’ babygirl” I muttered softly, shuffling out to the kitchen and opening the cabinet, I pulled out a tin full of wet food and cracked it open with my forefinger, taking out a spoon from the drawer. She meowed impatiently, causing my tired eyes to roll up involuntarily.

“Persephone” I muttered, tired but stern. “Jesus Christ should I call ASPCA?” I joked, taking a spoon out of the draw and nudging it closed with my hip quickly before spooning half the can in the bowl and chopping it up half-hazardly, before setting it on the floor with a clink. She dove in, eating like she’d been starved. 

I put a pod in my Nespresso machine, and rested my chin in my hand as my latte brewed, scrolling through my ‘For You’ page, sending a few videos to Sadie that made me stifle a laugh so as to not wake Carm. I opened my fridge, pouring some half and half in to my cup that I’d already filled with ice before pouring my espresso over the top and mixing it up before sealing the lid. 

I shuffled over to the couch, sitting down and continuing to scroll through videos as I sipped my latte. By the time I’d finished it, Persephone was sitting on the cat tree grooming herself in the morning light and the clock read 8:32. I got up, going over to my record player and shuffled through my selection of records, settling on Ctrl by SZA that Syd had gotten me. I bit my lip gently, thinking of her. 

I really hope she wasn’t mad at me…for too long. Thinking back on the conversations she had with us about her ‘boss’ who I now knew was Carm, he could be a serious asshole and he…emotionally led her on in a way? And they never explicitly mentioned their feelings but it sounds like there definitely was feelings..My thoughts are broken by the static of the record as it switches to the next song and Love Galore starts playing. 

I did my usual routine of walking around, pulling open my blinds to let the light in before heading to the kitchen to make breakfast. I washed Sephys bowl and set it on the small drying rack before setting a pan on the stove to heat. I opened the fridge, resting my hands on my hips, and realizing I have no idea what Carmen eats- if he eats breakfast. It’s a Saturday though…I settle on the safe options of eggs and toast. 

I popped 4 pieces of bread into the toaster, humming along to Doves in The Wind while I cracked 4 eggs into a glass measuring cup and whisking them with a fork. I added a little bit of garlic salt and pepper, mixing it again before dropping some butter in the pan and letting it melt. I got out 2 of my pink heart shaped plates and set them down in preparation, before pouring the eggs in the pan. It was quick to scramble so I put the toaster down, and I was shuffling over to the table just as the bedroom door opened. 

Carm genuinely looked refreshed. The bags under his eyes were mostly gone, and his eyes didn’t look red and exhausted. I look over at the clock, 9:22. “Good Morning, Chef. I hope scrambled eggs and butter toast is acceptable? With jelly of course” I went over, clicking off my record player that had stopped spinning a few minutes prior.  “You made breakfast?” He asked, looking over to the table. 

It took all of my strength to keep a casual face at his deep, husky morning voice. “Mmhmm!” I hum and come back to the table and he followed. “Coffee?” I ask and he nods “thank you- wow. I can’t remember the last time I.. actually ate in the morning. What time?-“ he looks over to the stove and his eyebrows raise. “Shit.” He snorts. “I guess your bed was comfortable” he sits. 

I smirk proudly “well I’m glad you’ve enjoyed your stay so far at Winnie’s bed and breakfast” I said and went to the kitchen, opening my cabinet and smiling wide at the perfect mug for him to use. I set it down on the counter, “cream?” I asked opening the fridge. “Yes, What are you cheesin’ about?” He teased and I giggle “somethin’ - just wait” I took out the cream and set it on the counter and popped in an americano pod. 

“Oh! Forks! Sorry. Forgot my meds this morning. Let me go do that” he chuckles as I quickly shuffled off. I go in to the bathroom and took my medications with a handful of sink water before coming back and seeing his coffee was done. “Perfect!” I took it out, putting cream in. “Sugar?” I asked and he shook his head “no” he said and I stirred the coffee, putting the spoon in the sink. 

I carefully come over, covering the art on the mug until I set it down in front of him with a giggle. “A Bear mug for Bear and it has a cute, true saying, ‘A hug a day keeps the lonelies away’ “ I giggled. “See that one’s me,” I point to the smaller one, “and that’s you,” I pointed to the bigger one “cause’ you give teddy-bear hugs” I smiled. He looks up at me, his blue eyes sparkling in the morning light, an adorable smirk on his face. 

“You…” he starts and shakes his head, pulling me into his lap and I giggle, wrapping my arms around his neck loosely to steady myself. He kisses all over my face, causing giggles to involuntarily fall from my lips and my eyes to squeeze shut at the quick short pecks that tickled like butterflies, my heart fluttering the same way in my chest. “Are so fucking cute” he hugs me close and I giggled, wrapping my arms around him. 

“Thank you” he kissed my neck sweetly before releasing me and I got up. “Wow, an ambush, I do take payment in kisses but warn me so I can count!” I joked, sitting down in my seat and he rolled his eyes playfully, a pink blush adorning his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. “Forks!” I said and he laughed, shaking his head again. 

“Does that happen all the time?” He asked and I nod, heading over to the drawer and grabbing 2 forks. “Yup. It’s worse if I don’t have my meds” I put his fork in front of him. “Hope it’s ok” I said and sit down “no- this is…this is great Winnie, thank you really” he said taking a bite and nodding. “5 stars Chef” he said and I laughed before taking a bite of mine. 

“Mmhmm totally I’m coming for your spot! Better get worried these eggs’ll put you out of business” I joked and he snorted, taking a sip of his coffee. “Mm- I think Starbucks should be a little scared” he teased and I giggle a bit, nibbling on my toast. “That’s all Nespresso that thing is amazing” 

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When we finished breakfast, Carm takes our plates and his mug over to the sink and starts washing them, along with the pan I’d used. “Wow…he cooks and cleans? You sure you aren’t taken already?” I joked, wiping down the table with a Lysol wipe. He chuckled “nope, haven’t gotten any serious offers” he joked back with a smile. 

“Did you wanna see my little library craft room thing?” I asked, throwing the wipe away in the garbage. He puts the now clean dishes on the drying rack. “Course, what do you…craft?” He asked, following me to the second bedroom and I opened the door. “Oh..lots of things. I sew,crochet,read, make jewelry, I paint sometimes” I shrugged and he looked around at all the half finished projects. 

“This is cute” he hummed, picking up a half finished star and moon granny square blanket off the back of my pink desk chair. “Oh! That’s for Syd’s birthday!! She’s such an astrology girl, it's one of those things we can talk about forever.” I smiled and he nods a bit. “Why haven’t you ever come around more? The uh- the restaurant” He asked as he looked over the intricate stitches and I shrugged, picking up stray crochet needles scattered on my desk and putting them in the little drawer where they belonged. 

“Oh.. well Sadie and I - it’s kinda fancy for one thing, and umm..we don’t like people and it’s been busy for months “ I laugh a bit “fancy huh?” He teased, setting the blanket back down and walking over to the wall of pictures I had next to my overflowing bookshelf. “It has been pretty busy” he said as he gazed over the different memories of girls trips Sadie and I had taken as well as pictures of nights out with Syd. 

“Also as you can probably tell- Sadie and I do not belong in a cool fancy place like that” I giggled and he shook his head rolling his eyes playfully with a smile. “I don’t either but it’s what brings the business right?” He looked over the books. “Damn, you read a lot” he said and I giggled. “Mmhmm! Work at a bookstore” I said and he pulled one of my most well loved books out, “this one of your slutty books?” He teased and I roll my eyes. 

“Ha.ha. No- this is an amazing book, you’re saying you’ve never read this book?” I took it from his hands. “My brother gave it to me” I said and flipped to the second blank page where ‘From Chris To Twinnie’ was scribbled in his chicken scratch handwriting. His eyebrows raised. “Oh…no- no. Never heard of it.” He said and my jaw dropped. “Never heard of The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane” I scoff a big smile coming to my face. 

“Okay, so, now I see” I nod, holding the book to my chest with a teasing smirk on my face. “See what?” He asked “I see why you…I dunno” I shrug. “Don’t like to have fun “ I poke his chest and he scoffs. “I have fun I am totally fun!! Are you saying I’m boring?” He asks, slightly offended and I laugh. “No! I’m saying that… the whole point of this book is that life, our journey to self discovery is useless if you have no intention of loving or being loved.” He raised his eyebrows before starting to laugh. 

“A rabbit said that?” He questioned and I shook my head “no he learned it. C’mon let me do skincare on you and read it you’ll love it” I said and he blushed a bit. “Why do I have bad skin?” He joked with a teasing smile. “No you have nice skin but let me take care of it” I said and led him to the bathroom by his hand, getting out my face wash “wash your face with this” I said and turned the water on warm, and grabbed a clean face towel from the cabinet with embroidered strawberries on the hem. “dry your face with this” I instructed. 

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I gently put on the sparkly under eye patches under Carm’s eyes and he scrunched his nose adorably. “The fuckin’ hell why do you do this” he muttered “feels like a slug” he said causing me to giggle “oh my god such a boy. This will make your pretty blue eyes much more noticeable without all the darkness from never sleeping” I gently smoothed them out, booping his nose with the tip of my finger when I was done. 

“Mm whatever you say this is Winnie’s Salon after all” he says and I tut “no! This is Winnie’s beauty parlor. I'm not cutting your hair today” I said and his eyes fluttered open, looking up at me with a small smile. “They look pretty on you” he said, causing me to blush. “You’re a big flirt” I gently played with his hair and his eyes fluttered back shut, humming softly in satisfaction. “Did you want me to read to you?” I asked and his smile grew. 

“Please. It’s been a long time actually, I’m excited to hear about this rabbit” he said and I grab the book from next to us, opening to the first page and starting. 

“Chapter One” 

By the end of the first page, he was glancing up at me, watching me speak each word and smiling slightly when I did slightly different voices for each character. At the end of the first chapter, I close the book and he pouts a bit. “What? No keep going, that was getting cute…she loves that bunny” he said and I giggle. “Yes she does, if you want to hear the next chapter you have to come see me again. Plus, I’m getting hungry” 

I peeled his eye patches off, gently rubbing in the remnants with my ring fingers and he smiled softly. “Mm…you cook breakfast, pamper me, and read to me? I think this is my new hang-out spot for Saturdays” he jokes and I giggle a bit. “Good, so next Saturday you’ll get to see what happens in the next chapter.” I said and he sat up, sitting against the headboard next to me. 

“Sounds like a steal for me” he smiled adorably, his skin still glowing from the serum I’d applied. I looked at his lips, then back at his eyes before straddling his hips and kissing him deeply. He hesitantly moves his hands to my hips and rubs with his thumbs gently. I kiss down his jaw over his stubble to his neck, nipping gently and he groans softly “Winnie” he said, gripping my hip a bit tighter. I gently tug on his ear with my teeth. “I think it’s hot you’re such a talented chef and like when I cook for you” I said softly in his ear, gently tangling his curls in my fingers as I continue to kiss and nip his neck. 

I grind my hips on his and he moaned softly “Winnie.” He said softly, moving his hand to my back “I-i…” he swallowed thickly and I stopped, sitting up and looking at him. “What? Did I..did I do something wrong?” I asked. He shook his head, refusing to meet my eyes. “I-I don’t…we shouldn’t” he rubs over his chin, thinking. 

“Do you…regret last night?” I asked, getting off his lap and sitting crisscross beside him on the bed. He shook his head again “no- god no that was fuckin’ amazing Winnie I-“ he blushed, looking down at his lap. “I’ve uh never…” he cleared his throat, his eyes squeezing shut in embarrassment. “I- I’m surprised I lasted that long with you- a-and…I’ve never done that before..what we did in the shower and I’m still- I’m thinkin’ about it” he swallowed thickly, finally looking at me and I nodded slowly. 

“Okay…I think we should talk more about our sexual experiences” I said and bit my lip. His face goes pale, his mouth opening and closing a few times like he was trying to find the words. “Uh- I” he stuttered. “I’ll go first…what uh- what do you wanna know?” I asked casually and play with the hem of my shirt. “Uh- well..that’s- I don’t… I don’t know a lot” he said quietly, clearly embarrassed by the way his eyes darted away from mine again. 

“Okay so…how about this then. I’ve slept with 24 people, including you. But most of the bulk of those were back home, I’ve slept with you and one other person since I’ve been here, how many have you been with?” I asked and his eyes widen. “Twenty four?” He repeats, his mouth dropping slightly. I scoff “what so guys can sleep with 100 women by the time their 24 but I can’t sleep with 2 people a year over the course of nearly 10 years?!” I asked my tone laced with annoyance. 

He shook his head quickly “no-n-no Winnie no…I’ve….ive slept with less then 8 people…I’ve had sex like…maybe…” he took a deep breath, looking away and swallowing thickly “I don’t- I don’t like this game anymore or- or questions. Or whatever” he said his cheeks going red. I bite back a laugh at the irony of him being so insecure by holding my tongue between my teeth and I gently touch his bicep. “Look at me” I said softly and he shook his head inching away from my touch a bit. 

“Carmen. When I said no one has made me cum like that- I mean it. I was fully seeing stars bro I was shaking Carm.” I laughed and he looked over, eyebrows raising. “You really meant that?” He asked and I roll my eyes playfully. “I wasn’t even gonna fuck you a second ago I was gonna suck your dick because I’m sore. Literally yes you’re amazing Carmen you’re so fucking hot.” I said and he bit his lip, looking at his lap. 

“But I can’t…like- when…when we were in the shower” he muttered “that was-“ he swallowed thickly “I’ve never…I’ve never had sex in the shower before and-“ he sighs deeply. “I don’t want to get attached.” He looks at me finally, and I was silent for a moment, my brain filing through all the possible things he could mean. I settled on the safest response that would have the least possible chance of rejection. “Like- you don’t want tooo…” I questioned and he raised his eyebrows waiting for me to continue. 

“To get attatched to fucking me on your days off?” I question and he rolls his eyes, shaking his head. “Winnie” he muttered, slightly annoyed. “That’s not what I mean Y’know that” he said and I bit my lip. “Tell me what you mean then, Carmen” I said and he looked up at me. He stared at me for what felt like forever, studying me, my features, I tried my best to decipher what was going on behind his eyes but only a week of knowing each other I was rolling blanks. 

“I don’t want to get attached to this. Winnie, to you. I don’t want to do this, we can’t do this.” He shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest and the small change in body language felt like an ocean of distance was suddenly created between us emotionally. My mouth suddenly felt dry, and my throat was growing an enormous lump. “Why” I finally choke out and he looks back at me. “Because I told you, Winnie, I’m not boyfriend material. What this” he motions between the 2 of us “Is, can’t keep going like this. Fuckin’ cuddling and shit..” 

I felt like I wanted to burst out into tears, not more than 20 minutes ago he was dreamily looking up at me while I read to him and now he was telling me that he won’t allow himself to be around me, and relax. “Oh” I scoff, my eyes narrowing and crossing my arms over my own chest. 

“You are such a little baby,” I said and his eyebrows furrow, “what?” He asked. “A little fucking. Baby.” I repeat myself and he blinks a few times, “What the fuck do you mean?” He asked and I got up. “You are an angry baby, because you realize that I have more experience in the bedroom!” I laugh dryly. “Carmen. You knew what you were getting yourself into. You want this. Look at me, and tell me the last fucking time you relaxed on your day off? Hm?” I raise my eyebrows, shrugging and waiting for an answer. 

“You don’t fucking know me, Winnie” he scoffs. “I don’t- I don’t give a fuck that you have more experience than I do. Clearly, it wasn’t with anyone good! Per your fuckin statement 5 minutes ago.” I shook my head. “You’re right! You’re right Carmen. I was begging for your cock- and you wanna know something? You loved it. You were pussy drunk, Carmen, you- you are just so fucking obsessed with depriving yourself of joy, of pleasure that instead of allowing yourself to fuck me you’d rather be in your apartment all alone and cum in your hand? Fine. Have fun” I shrugged, motioning to the bedroom door. 

He sat there, jaw dropped. “You-“ he closed his eyes in shock, shaking his head as he digested what I just said to him. “You are so-“ he sighed, looking at me and his eyes flicker to my chest. I smirk, “fuck. Im gonna fucking hate myself this week. C’mere” he said and I knelt on the bed, straddling him once more and kissing him deeply. I pushed him back on the bed roughly. “Tell me you don’t want me” I said and peel off my shirt, exposing my breasts and already peaked nipples shining with their little black studs, already hardened due the adrenaline coursing through me. 

“Fuck off Winnie you know I fucking want you” he grabs my breast, playing with my nipple gently and I bit my lip. “I haven’t even showed you half of what I can do- and you’re gonna throw the towel so soon?” I rest my palms on his shoulders for leverage as I ground into his hips, the friction causing his eyes to flutter shut and his head to fall back onto the pillow in a low whimper. 

“N-no- no you’re right. You’re right Winnie fuck” he moaned, gently tugging at my jewelry causing me to gasp in pleasure. I kiss him hard, circling my hips into his at a torturously slow pace causing him to whimper and groan into my mouth which made a small smile come to my lips. I pulled away slightly, our lips barely an inch away. 

“Do you want me to suck your cock?” My eyes flutter to his, my hips completely still. His breath quivers “yes” he said barely above a whisper. “Tell me, say it, Carmy. What do you want?” I ask and kiss his neck tenderly. “I-I want you t-to” he swallows thickly when I nip at the tender spot below his ear. “I want you to suck my cock” he said, eyes fluttering shut and cheeks going red. I smirk, happy with the admission, but still unsatisfied with the way he was denying himself. 

“Okay baby, since you asked so nice, like such a good boy” I said, his lip tugging between his teeth and

I kissed down his chest, his abs tightening when I made my way over them, my tongue dragging slowly down the divot in the middle. He watches me with hooded eyes, hands gripping the sheets so tightly his knuckles were turning white, his chest raising up and down deeply at a quick rate as he watches me worship him. 

I straddle his calves, gently rubbing his fully hardened length through his sweatpants and he whines softly “please-please Winnie” he breathed impatiently. I smirked, my hands rubbing long teasing strokes up and down his thighs. “Do you really want me to suck your cock, Carmen?” I asked and he swallows thickly. “Winnie” he wined, looking away and his cheeks heating. 

I stopped touching him and my hands raised to my breasts, gently palming and squeezing them before playing with my hard nipples and my head dropping back as I moaned. “You don’t want me, baby?” I asked and his hand traveled to his pants and I stopped him, grabbing his wrist. “Do you want me Carmen?” I asked, taking his hand and putting his forefinger and ring finger in my mouth, my tongue swirling around them and hollowing my cheeks at the base of his hand. 

He bit his lip harshly as I did so. “So so fucking bad.” He said softly, I pulled off his fingers with a ‘pop’ and tugged him out of his boxers, leaning down and spitting the puddle of saliva I had collected in my mouth while sucking on his fingers and pump his length with the wetness, twisting and getting it all wet. “Holy fucking shit” he mumbled, a moan falling from his lips and his head falling back momentarily but he was quick to put his eyes back on me. 

“Does that feel good baby?” I ask sweetly, my thumb brushing over his tip. He nods “shit- yes s-so good baby” his abs clenched in pleasure as I slowly dragged my thumb over his slit teasingly. “Mmm the noises you make are so sexy baby I love it” my other hand dances around his stomach, my nails brushing the toned skin causing him to shiver slightly. 

“Oh you adorable thing” I said and leaned down, kissing his tip gently and his head drops back, a breathy moan falling from his lips, his knee jerking slightly under me. I stuck out my tongue, slowly licking his tip from the back of my throat all the way to the tip of my tongue, flicking it teasingly causing him to whimper beautifully. “You have such a nice cock baby” I praised, pumping him slowly, twisting my hand how I knew he liked based on the way his stomach would tense when I did it repeatedly. 

I look up at him, his cheeks, bright red, curls stuck to his forehead in sweat, “do you like it when I tug harder” I did so and he whines “or softer?” I went back to my original firmness and he breathed out, I could tell no one had really ever given him this kind of attention during a blow job before- so I was relishing in the fact that no matter if he did claim to hate himself this week, every time he came after a long day it would be at the thought of me. So I’m pulling out every stop, every theatric - I’m going to make this magical. 

I was already fucking him dumb and I had barely used my mouth yet. We had a lot of work to do, to mold him into the kind of partner I knew he yearned to be. And whether we continued to pretend to be ‘friends with benefits’ while he learned, or he decided he wanted more- I didn’t care. Because I knew this man wanted to dominate, and I was dedicated to getting it out of him. 

When I got no verbal response my hand stopped moving and I gently tap the head of his cock against my tongue getting his attention. “Words.” I said softly, smiling sweetly as I waited for a response. “Hard. H-hard. Please.” He said and I continued as he requested and he grunts “fuck yes…mmm twist baby like-“ he moans louder when I oblige. “Yes. Yes.” he breathed and I smirked, moving my hand faster. 

“Good boy, I love it when you tell me what feels good” I said and my hand that was on his stomach travels to his v-line, my forefinger soothingly stroking as I took his tip in my mouth, he lets out the hottest noise between a moan and a cry that I’d heard a man make, before I heard the sounds of the fabric beginning to give beneath his death grip. I pulled my lips off and stopped my hand from jacking him off, taking my hand off his stomach and pulling my hair out of the bun it was in. 

His eyes shot open as soon as I stopped, a small gasp tumbling from his lips as my tight curly bangs fell over my forehead, when they were blown out they were the 80s look I loved to achieve with my hair- but my bangs were extra curly naturally since they weren’t weighed down like the rest of my hair and I’d gotten it wet last night. I pushed it off my shoulders, taking his hand and putting it on my head. “Go as hard as you want. I’ll squeeze you twice if it’s too much.” I said and started again before he could reply. 

He whined hotly as I took him down inch by inch until he was lightly hitting the back of my throat, he was mostly just stroking the back of my head but when he felt me swallow around his tip it was like something in him flicked on. He grips the back of my hair “f-fuck- god do that again- fuck do it again Winnie” he said, pushing my head down gently. I closed my eyes, saying a silent and quick prayer to every god ever that I’d fully digested my breakfast, and that my gag reflex had gotten much better since trying to train it with my toothbrush before bed the past few years. 

I took a deep breath, before fully relaxing my throat and pushing his tip past my tastebuds and I gently stroke his thighs, more to soothe myself that I could do it, before pushing deeper. He cries out, moaning what sounded more like a pleasured growl, his fingers tugging my hair lightly. I knew I had to stop pushing before I either hurt myself or actually gag and embarrass myself. I swallowed around him slowly, my throat fluttering around him for a few moments. 

I feel his muscles all tense beneath me, his abs tightened, stomach clenched, fingers digging into my scalp, eyes screwed shut, veins protruding in his neck. He would be cumming in the next few seconds so - I stopped. I pull off, sitting up, a string of saliva pulling from his cock to my lips as I did so. My lips swollen, jaw sore, chin and neck slick with saliva. I smirked as he gasps, his orgasm flowing away like dandelion seeds in the breeze and he looked at me, his pupils blown with lust. 

“W-why. Why did you stop?” He asked, he almost sounded angry. I shrug, “do you deserve to cum, Carm? You you deserve to feel good?” My fingers dance around his stomach and v line causing goosebumps to appear on his skin and his cock twitches, aching to be touched. “Please Winnie, fucking- let me finish” he grumbled, looking at the ceiling. 

“Let you” I scoff. “Do you even think you deserve that. Carmen? Hm? Put enough hours in this week? Plan enough new catering orders?” I taunt, goading him into showing me any thread of dominance in him I could tug on. He looks at me, his eyes darkening “suck my fucking cock. Winnie.” he ordered and I smirk. “Ooo, making demands now, I only serve those who deserve it” I drag my forefinger from his balls to his tip, smiling at the reaction of his stomach clenching and cock jumping in a twitch. 

“I deserve it” he grumbled, not meeting my eyes. “Hm?” I hum, ghosting my hand around his cock but not gripping it. “I said I fucking deserve it” he looks into my eyes as he said it. I lean down taking him back in my mouth and he sighs in relief, I pump the bottom half of his length as I take him back into my throat. It was barely 2 minutes of him spilling profanity, muttering my name, whines and moans, and only swallowing around him 2 times before I felt him fully tense up again, and an enormous load shot down the back of my throat, so much that I had to swallow 2 times after pulling off of him to get it all down.  

“Holy shit” I laugh taking a deep breath and he was laid there, trying to catch his breath “sorry” he said between breaths, eyes blissfully shut and cheeks flushed as well as his chest from his release. “No its…it’s fine just. Holy shit. You just dumped a generation down my throat” I joked and he laughs lightly.  

I quickly fix his boxers and laid next to him after pulling my shirt back on. “How the fuck did you do that?” He asked and I shrug a bit, pushing my hair behind my shoulders. “Dunno. Just tried it. Glad you like it though. How’d it feel?” I asked and he blushed, averting my gaze shyly. “Uh…” he furrows his eyebrows thinking. “Kinda like…your pussy but … like way tighter, and harder if that makes sense.” He looked back at me and I giggle. 

“Hm…ok. It was kinda cool, also really hot, also pretty freaky- when I went to wipe my chin, my hand touched my throat and I felt your dick like…” I giggle, covering my mouth at his shocked expression. “Holy fuck that’s hot” he said and I nod. “Felt weird. I’ll have you feel it next time” I said and yawned a bit, sitting up. 

“I’m gonna brush my teeth then you wanna nap?” I asked and he nodded “I’m not sure why- we’ve done basically nothing but I’m exhausted.” He said and rubs his face. I shrugged, “just your body catching up while it can on rest. I’ll be back.” I said and padded off to the bathroom. 

.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·..·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·

➵ 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫

[hotluncheddie]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

ty @steddieasitgoes !! this was fun!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

16!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

26,316 (wtf)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

steddie / st only 😤

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Tiny Green Shorts 

2. Seasons change, but people don't.

3. extra credit

4. that's when boys kiss

5. pretty boy

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

YES! i luv comments! its one of the best parts of writing anything and makes it extra fun! its connecting with people!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

mmm i don't really like angsty endings. i guess Little Lamb has the most general angst but tbh that's not even gonna be a sad ending once its done - its gone have a lot of hope. maybe just high masking but again the connected part is comfort heavy

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

everything :) happy endings only in this house! 🍓 is maybe the most good vibes all the way thru piece

8. Do you get hate on fics?

its honestly a dream of mine to get cyber bullied one day, so no but if anyone wants to u can just this once

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

ya - mmmm mild d/s dynamics and graphic descriptions of bellies :)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

no - sometimes i think about doing like film inspired steddie but idk if i'll ever get around to it (like school of rock au or dead poets society au)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

no???

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

no! but that would be cool!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no :) i think having to consider someone else's schedule when writing would be stressful - i am slow

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

steddieeeee 😤👌🫡💪

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i'm working on a openly bi steve / queer eddie fic and it needs a lot of editing and keeps growing and it could honestly never get done but i really hope i work it out one day (i wanna incorporate music into the like theme of the scenes somehow but i dunno if i'm capable enough for it to be good - plus rewriting is hard bc what's there is good its just not right for this)

16. What are your writing strengths?

i like to think i can write my rancid sewer goblin dream boy eddie munson pov well

and maybe dialogue, or like metaphors?? i also have a thing about rhythm when i write so hopefully that come through, like pace and flow of sentences or whatever.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i have like pictures in my head and i never know how much to describe, like do i go full setting and facial expressions but then that feels like too much so idk. but ye that - the stuff around the dialogue

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i dumb baby i wouldn't even try bc it would just be google translate n that's embarrassing

19. First fandom you wrote for?

this one! i only lurked before hehe I've used ao3 for like over 10 years and this fandom was the first i ever wanted to make anything for

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

uhhh i think unmasking is very dear to my heart. but also Seasons change, but people don't. just bc its still my longest fic to date

that was fun! no pressure tags!! and sorry if you've already been tagged don't be mad a meeee!!!

@pearynice @numinosmoon @2btheanswertothequestion @flowercrowngods @aringofsalt @scarcrossdlvrs

[sillygreenrat]

I have some more smokeybat headcanons, got inspired now

#. Sam gets a big crush on Uzi, he wants to try impress her and hang out with her. So he tries asking her out whenever he can, Uzi oblivious to his crush agrees and hangs out with him a lot.

#. Uzi shows him anime and he ends up liking anime quite a lot, his favourite type being chill slice of life or the cooking anime. Makes him jealous they can't eat like humans can

#. He makes her a badge of their favourite anime character for her to wear on her beanie.

#. Sam is a talented artist and has a sketch book full of drawings and abstract work too. When he on magnets is when some his most colourful work is done. He has a very detailed drawing of Uzi he keeps special. It's of her in class reading, she looked so pretty that day.

#. Sam got a bit jealous when Thad started talking to Uzi , he could see Uzi seemed to like him a bit and was a little sad by that. He got more upset when N showed up because he could definitely see Uzi big crush on him.

#. He talk with Uzi about N and he encourages her to tell him how she feels, being a wingman.

#. Sam writes a love note to Uzi along with a drawing and sends it to her anonymously, hoping to impress her. He was too scared to sign it.

I have more if you like to listen to it

i am SO sorry for taking so long on these lmfao???? i really wanted to think abt these. tysm for sending me all of these delightful thoughts to grab and run with i would absolutely be willing to hear more

1 + 5: it was a crush that's been there since the begining, uzi was always kinda cute and charming, the way she interupted class with sarcastic wit on occasion, the way she would go above and beyond what the assignments were just to have her own fun. sam has always been the more quiet, shut in type, always following rules, never usually being the type to speak up or make a sound, but whenever uzi does something particularly silly he can't help but laugh a little (and boy shes a whole fucking circus so lemmie tell you). though he had to eventually start making moves once thad god involved.

for the record, i do NOT ship thad n uzi, i get it as a ship, but it just aint my thing, however im a big fan of unrequitted love, and i can absolutely see uzi just not being interested in the popular jock type (shes more into the silent stoner type COUGH COUHG(J)), seeing thad as more of a close friend due to him being so caring when no one else seemed to be.

unfortunately for sam the only time he was able to fully talk and get to know uzi was AFTER she was already introduced to his oil (lmfao)

2: this dude wants to eat so bad, let this man manifest some robot mac n cheese for his ass. its not 'hunger' but its like, some fuckin program malfunction due to the magnets that you could compare to stoner munchies but lord does he get angry when uzi puts on a ghibli or some shit and they start makin ramen or some shit.

on the topic of anime tho uzi would absolutely be into anime and try and get sam (and by extention N and possibly V) into anime

current hyperfixation is firmly beliving shes be a nutcase over jujutsu kaisen (would love the curses and their vibe of 'we wanna take over humanity' but the humans are pretty cool too she GUESSES) but i think shed also be into shit like kill la kill, evangelion, maybe even a smidge of ouran on the side bc damn it she wants to be surrounded by a buncha cute boys (and low and behold be projecting trasmasc feelings onto uzi but boy she'd feel a sense of 'man i bet i could pull off a suit' and she WOULD)

3 + 4: him being obsessed w/ drawing n stuff is honestly a small headcanon i had personally!!!!! glad its a thing for another person ugh (positive) he would totally pay attention to the characters she hyperfixates on and go CRAZY making her posters and small keychain hangers and such (probably has an old laminator in his house that he uses to seal the all to keep them from getting ruined). i like to imagine he likes to draw/paint skyscapes, trying to find really interesting cloud formations or spots where the moon shines through them to draw cuz he thinks that kinda shits beauitufl, would absolutely love earth sky's so fucking much let this man see them

6 + 7: N IS BEST WINGMAN. i ship all of them together in one homoginous poly so i can confirm this happened and it was real. would absolutely help sam before he even considered allowing his feelings for uzi show

[iantimony]

midday tuesday

sort of getting a handle on the volume of work i have to do. ough. writing this tuesdaypost while i wait for the initial step of a simulation to finish running so i can see if what i'm doing is correct.

listening: listening to haken's fauna album again because i'm seeing them live soon (!!)

next listening (against my better judgement because you can probably figure out where i live based on it): local bar had some bands this past weekend, i missed the first group (dopplepopolis) unfortunately because i am chronically late to things that don't have consequences but allegedly they did a holst mars cover ?? which sounds fascinating and i'm so mad i missed it. the second group was alright (the lunar diamonds), pretty good stage presence and they clearly had a lot of fun but their original songs were a little forgettable to me, their cover of psycho killer WAS a banger. i'm very sad they don't have that put up on spotify. but the third group (please her). oohhhh baby. i fell a little bit in love with the lead singer, not gonna lie! i went and listened to their spotify and while some of it really doesn't hit the same as the live performance it's still very fun. she had a spray bottle full of water and was periodically spritzing the audience. at the very end she was like "welcome to church, you may be seated" and had us all sit/crouch on the floor to listen to her announcements about the band over a groovy backing track. their bassist is INSANELY good too. mans be slappin that thang. they listed their genre as "scorpion core" which i still do not understand but god bless 'em.

anyways. they have one album out right now (bandcamp / spotify) and it's worth giving a listen. favorite track: 12 @ the Party, followed closely by Fellas!. i will probably buy it next bandcamp friday.

the lunar diamonds only have one track up on spotify but it is one of their originals that i found toe-tappy: Treads

i'll have to give the band i missed a chance but it will likely not hit the same as if it were live. c'est la vie

finally, haven't finished the release radar for this week yet, but i do really love ethan bortnick. the way he meshes classical-inspired piano with the alt beats is just so fun. hide n seek

reading: next mdzs book came in from the library! truly nothing like the rush of getting the notification "your book is ready to take out" before the estimated date :3 so i'm a little ways into volume 2 now, we're in yi city, xue yang is soooo much more obviously desperate to get xiao xingchen fixed in the book than in the show. loser (affectionate)

watching: next verse same as the first. dungeonmeshi and kill la kill with boyf. the kelpie animations were really fun and also the kraken !! good shit. there are other posts that have explained this better but i love the way trigger is animating the backgrounds. as for klk, we're on ep15 now! i have forgotten sooo much of this show, nui harime showed up and i was like oh SHIT i forgot about her !! entirely!!! so it's been a really fun rewatch.

playing: ran dnd saturday and played dnd on monday! saturday dnd defeated the mdzs dancing fairy :b at some point i will probably design something that involves finding a haunted arm pointing in a direction to reuinite its body a la nie mingjue but we've got some very strong anti-undead characters in this party so that may not go over very well. monday dnd involved getting hunted by a spooky fey hyena and getting robbed by a goblin group. something something goblin microaggressions. still fun even though i was VERY sleepy by the end of it.

making: pottery that i FORGOT TO PHOTOGRAPH ... i was like "i'll take pics at open studio saturday" and then the kiln was running so, on one hand, yayyyy kiln! on the other, no pics for this tuesdaypost. so. more pics next week. i did make some hopefully-teacups for my bf, depending on how severe the shrinkage is, but these are the smallest items i've been able to make (0.5lb clay) and it's sooo much harder than i thought it would be. pics with ruler for shrinkage measuring purposes

you might catch in the first photo that the top cup has noticeably thicker walls than the others ... don't worry about it ......

eating: coconut fish and tomato bake thing that i added too much lime to by accident but still tasty... sheet pan tofu and brussel sprouts!!!! so this is an elite one, adding to the arsenal. literally just halve the sprouts and cube the tofu, drizzle w olive oil and salt and peppy, roast at 450 til its. done. whenever. while that's roasting make rice. the sauce is 1:1 ratio of tahini to hoisin sauce with minced garlic to taste. it is To Die For and SO easy. last night roommate made turkey meatballs with couscous and even though the couscous burned just a little bit it was still yummy!

misc: turns out ... if your body wants ~9 hours of sleep a night but you make it live off of 7 for weeks on end ....... eventually you will get sick LOL. probably partly alcohol ibs stuff but still. sunday was a total wash for me and i went to bed at 10pm and felt normal monday morning. so. i need to just be going to bed earlier (pain). work this week not as terrible at least. i am doing my shit that i need to be doing and it's going okay! which is good because i'm calling it an early week kinda for that concert hehe. oh valentines day! boyf got me a little leatherman multitool keychain and it's so cute and i love it, and i got him a bird scope phone holder so he can take bird photos easier!!!

[beefboyandbabygirl]

my fic timelines (for fun) !

SPOILERS FOR ALL MY CURRENTLY RELEASED FICS, just thought this would be fun for anyone that enjoys my stuff. You can kinda get an idea of what the fic is before it's y'know the full, completed thing. Sometimes I write down specific quotes I want in the story, and most of the time I also plot out the metaphors I want to use and stuff to sort of keep everything connected (but i have decided to forgo the metaphor-plotting). Also sometimes I end up changing things from how it's originally intended (just in case u read smth and ur like "thats not the way it was!"). the girl code one is soooar funny frs

*also shiver me timbers doesnt have a timeline bc its so short lol

GOODBYE, FOURTH OF JULY:

party-party sad

how yn and chan met + how yn is avoiding him during classes now, purposefully making herself late so she can sit with someone else and chan watches her intensely across the lecturehall 

chan FINALLY gets yn to his house while hes getting ready for a date. theres like a semi confrontation where hes like “i can tell your lying u kno” og yn er like… “no im nooooot” 

yn is soooooo depressed. so seungkwan and soonyoung and host an intervention (seungkwan is a second opinion)

chan develops a theory that someone mightve harassed yn at the party and he has heard women can b embarrassed ab that type of thing 

chan finally rips yn to his house and hes ANGRY bc shes been ignoring him and shes scared and feels bad and they have this big argument (“WHY WONT U LET ME HELP YOU”)  where she ends up confessing and chan realizes in that moment that hes in love with her too

super hot sex w praise and sweetness and desperation TIHIHIHIHIH

JUDAS IN THE WINDOW:

Yn comes home, thinks about chan blah blah sees him in window

Yn explroes the suburban ass town, sees the church is drawn to it. Is surprised to see chan in there WEARING A PRIEST UNIFORM. Naur. They talk a little. Sees the judas stained glass. Chan invites her to eat at his house also invites her to like church get together in 2 days

Yn eats dinner at his house, finds out he BOUGHT IT OFF HIS PARENTS WHEN THEY WANTED TO MOVE. CRAZY. A lot of tension and maybe a small argument bc of their differences and how yn kinda judges him for staying the same in the same place and how chan kinda judges her for being a whore n shit 

Yn still comes to the get together much to chans surprise! She keeps trying to apologize but ppl KEEP getting in the way! So chan is like just wait here until after the thing and shes like ok lmao. 

Chan and yn sex scene but first they gotta like. Talk out their differences. “I always felt a bit like judas” 

“I can’t tell if its you or god I turned my back to” you laugh

He watches you with an unreadable expression. “Maybe both,” he whispers. 

GIRL CODE:

at a party, yn and the girlies and dare i say mingyu find woozis book hes always writing in. after much debate, they decide to open it, and what in gods name. its the girl code. the girlies r outraged. thats for girls only. they dont confront woozi, as he has left (he forgot the book lmao).

yn and the girlies confront woozi after class in a secluded classroom. they interrogate. woozi, usually cold and cynical, cracks under the pressure of vicious angry girls and admits. hes writing it down so he knows how to approach his crush. yn is sad. 

yn thinking over her relationship with woozi. yeri (roommate) is annoyed bc she can hear her thinking (outrageous). flashback to the party where woozi #fucked her and shes wondering if it was really that long ago (it was). 

the girls have adopted woozi, and yn kinda thinks its torture bc now she is sad around him (and v insecure bc DOES NO ONE WANT HER?). but they coo and they love him bc hes such a sweet boy, and they’re giving him tips while theyre doing their makeup for a night out  and hes writing it down diligently. he asks her if shes ok. shes a little taken aback. yeah i am. 

another night of helping woozi and adopting him. mingyu wants 2 join but hes NOT one of the girls and hes all whiny and sad about it bc he does NOT want to go out with seungcheol and jeonghan again theyre mean. too bad. ur not woozi. this is for woozi and girls only. i imagine woozi pulls yn to the side and asks her directly like. i know ur not okay. i can tell. there’s something wrong. yn is like. i dont want to talk about it. woozi is like fine queen. 

mingyu (who is closest to yn) WANTS TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING IN WITH THE ADOPTED WOOZI THING. hes asking her over lunch and shes all angry ab it. she finally spills that hewas writing down notes for his crush and now shes sad bc  she kinda likes him and thought they had smth going on. mingyu is shook. he partially thinks the whole girl code book is rlly funny but he also feels bad. he buys her a froyo. 

at another party and mingyus mission is to get yn laid so shes no longer insecure and so she can get over woozi. introduces her to wonwoo and they talk at the party. while theyre talking yn notices woozi storming off from the party and putting two and two together, she figures things probably went south w his crush. she catches up to him outside the party and hes all angry and buff and doesnt want to talk to her. a heated discussion w jealousy and woozi finally confesses by being like. ok wait and he goes into a random garden and picks out a couple of flowers and start reciting the confession script on his phone. yn is like. noar way. shes shook and doesnt say anything and so woozi starts being all apologetic like. i know its not roses and i know its not exactly the setting you guys told me- yn kisses him tihi. they kiss then have the sex. its great. jealous sex. yum.

I ❤️ DILFS / GOOD GIRL:

Bff Giselle convinces yn to go to seokmins party invite (and bring her) and also idk maybe seokmin and vernon and her as a kid flashbacks? - establishes yns character, and also seokmins kindaaa

At the party and jeonghan flirts w her haaaarddd and seokmin is like lmao stay away from her and then brings her to his room where she’s safe and they talk ab what they’ll do in the fall break and they realize they’ll both be at dorm during holiday and then they’re like we should hang out fo sho

They hang out the first day and there’s like an ooopsie moment like hm idk what yet, maybe like seokmin remembers from childhood that’s she’s ticklish and he tickles her and they’re wrestling and he ends up on top of her (sexual tension tihi)

They hang out again and they drink? and yn ends up spilling that she’s bad at masturbating…. N he teaches her while they watch porn….. hot (smut frs) 

Next day again and yn is insisting on returning the favor but seokmin is v v sweet and in luv n is like noarrr but yn insists and then she gives him a blowjob  

Yn facetimes vernon and it makes her feel like a whore and tells him she doesn’t want to do it anymore over text (she’s afraid if she sees him shell abandon all modesty and jump his bones) and they don’t see each other that day - conflict 

Seokmin at her door. She only lets him in when he says sum shit like “I need to know I didn’t make you uncomfortable”. Then they confess their feelings and they have fr sex (also virgin mode, #firsttime, #dickomode) 

i hav 2 more completed timelines, but the fics arent done yet >:)))

[jwowwsboobs]

9, 13, 22:))

HI HI HI :))) i got very chtty w these SORRYYYYY so its under the cut 🫂🍻 sending u lots n lots of love !!

9. 3 things you like doing on a rainy day

definitely reading, ive got this big ol book of alexander pushkins prose (supposedly the complete collection but i dont always buy tht) n a bunch of other stuff i hvnt started on 💔💔 sometimes ill reread hillbilly elegy by jd vance or the collection of ftwillz stuff it just depends on my mood; writing also ofc, im always working on stuff whether it’s poetry, prose or a song just depends on my mood but its still writing 2 me LOL; n watching either tv (probably xfiles, sometimes trailer park boys or girls next door) or a bunch of movies tht hve been rotting on my tubi watchlist LOLLLLL

13. 3 classes you used to hate in middle school

HATED english, my teacher sucked so unbelievably bad N she was a disney grandma. she retired when i was in 7th n moved 2 florida outside of disney or smthing. hated science cuz the teacher was awful, couldn’t teach at all kept like. giving easily checked false information. n hated hated hated religion (went 2 a priv catholic. the priests were cool (favorite memory is when the class clown asked abt black metal n the priest was like. do not EVER listen 2 christian black metal is SUCKS. listen 2 real true black metal. tht priest was super cool he played guitar n did fencing n collected swords n was trying 2 get the bishop 2 let him grow a super duper long beard. he also went paint balling as chaperone w a bunch of kids from the parish. i got 2 go (was the only girl💔💔) but it was really fun!) but it was. catholic religion class. in 8th grade we were supposed 2 do sex ed yk? like state mandated n whtnot. ours was a vid abt how women were created 2 b submissive 2 men in all ways, how marriage protects the sanctity of sex n its only btwn a man n woman whtnot. it was super cute🩷(sarcasm) 

22. 3 movies/books/tv shows that made you cry

so idk if this is well known abt me but i am a MAJOR crybaby ill cry over anything (it my cancer moon LOL) like i went 2 the senior nite soccer (trve football) game n this guy who im guess his dad died scored a goal n his family had a little yk framed headshot of him n when he scored he ran over 2 side n grabbed n tht made me cry 4 a good five minutes. crying rn writing tht out !! but anyway. xfiles made me cry (scully wanting kids n not being able 2 hv them got me 😭😭😭😭n also just mulder like in general. he looks like a kicked dog sometimes) miami vice made me cry (sorry 4 falling 4 the copaganda but their CLOTHES. n the CARS……..), secrets of playboy made me cry but like. in anger. also in sadness n sympathy. but the root was anger. i hvnt watched a lot of movies recently the last one tht made me cry was kill bill vol 2 but beyond tht idr like i said i cry over anything LOL. most of the books i read r nonfiction n but the last one tht i read was give me some truth by eric gansworth 4 english class n i cried from frustration reading tht 😭😭 but beyond tht, like w movies, i dont remember 💔💔

[gaybabything]

Awwwww you have so many pets!! Agh they sound so cute. One day I will have a cat and I plan on naming it Pringles (if it is orange) and Pickles (for any other color)!!

OH THE ADVENTURE ZONE IS SO GOOD! But... you need to like their humor in order to like it- so I can understand if it isn't for you lol. Until the end of the first arch they are just following a module and having a good time, nothing really story heavy happens until later. (OH BUT ITS SO WORTH IT OMG-)

Favorite was ELA I always loved writing, I was just sad that it was almost NEVER creative writing. Just boring essays n' stuff. Least favorite was history/geography and... it shows. I am... REALLY dumb when it comes to those two things.

Favorite stuffed animal... hmmm. I would probably have to go with either Fred the GIANT stuffed bear, or my dragon with no wings (totally not a dinosaur- I refuse to admit that-) and his name is Quest!

As to what I am drawing: Right now I am working on my comic! I would show you but it might give away who I am haha (also- can't send pictures via anon)

Questions: What is underland chronicles about? Funny how similar our taste in shows was because MAN I know none of the books you listed. Do you have a favorite video game?

(also this is so fun! Thank you for doing this with me! I love meeting new people on here!!)

-🌻

History is my downfall as well!

Ok, so The Underland Chronicles follows the story of this 12 year old kid named Gregor. He lives in a small New York apartment with his mom and 2 sisters. One day, he and his baby sister fall down a vent shaft in their apartment building laundry room... and then keep falling. And falling. They wind up in this place called the Underland. It's an absolutely massive cave system running underneath like, the entire U.S. Down there is a full on city of people called Regalia. There, Gregor learns that he's a great warrior foretold by the prophecies of their people. And that basically all the animals in the underland are massive and sentient. There are giant bats that people "bond" with and can fly on the backs of. Giant man eating rats that want to kill all the humans in Regalia, giant cockroaches, giant mice, giant lizards, and just so much more.

This poor kid has been prophecized to basically save this kingdom from like a billion different threats. He has to kill this entire rat army, find a cure for a deadly plague, slay this extra giant rat dude, and like so much more. Also, this is written by Suzanne Collins, the author of the Hunger Games. So while these are books intended for 12 year olds, they are violent and graphic. So many characters die, and I think I cried over like every book. The last one really left me messed up. They are great. Like, for example, there's a scene where a character gets eaten alive by a giant pitcher plant, and they try to save her, but when they pull her out she's like completely dissolved by acid from the waist up. And on multiple occasions Gregor has been described as "drenched in blood" (not his own) and just absolutely traumatized. This kid gets messed up.

I love it literally so much. This series was like, the best thing my little 10 year old self ever read. I still encourage people to read it no matter your age cause it's just so good. It's also really hard to describe so my little summary does not do it justice at all.

My favorite video game is Little Nightmares! Specifically the first one, but I'm also a big fan of the second! I was also a big Undertale kid, but for some reason now I don't remember much of it?

Questions: Do you have a favorite video game? And aside from Warrior Cats, what's your favorite childhood book? Or favorite book in general?

(It's past 12 am here so I'm probably gonna go to bed in a bit!)

[rawrmeansilyindinosawr]

day 6/7

rose/skyler's writing challenge

day 6 was supposed to b 'a stranger' but i feel like ive written sm ab strangers passing me by n also me being a stranger to others n viewing myself as even a 3rd person party within this strange world so idk if irly feel the need to continue to elaborate on dat. so im skipping it. n day 7 is ..

“an ex crush/bf/gf”

he is young, and he is selfish. he rashly states no one serves him any purpose and i think it is so optimistically nihilistic. he is vague. and thinks he is the reason why i am now fully gay. he jokes that he can read my mind. but we are not friends nor enemies or anything really defined. he makes me feel like im falling behind. as if queerness isnt something we r all collectively experiencing in real time. i was raised to be ashamed of my queerness while he was taught it was an identity to embrace. 24 fucking k. followers on his tiktok because of how hes gay. my transness felt like a shadow bc he initially said he was only t4t but i was "an exception.' how disillusioning in the eye of perception so. forget the way i would bind my chest in fun house like mirror reflections.

he was always and still is perpetually and constantly in a state of love. n its beautiful but dont think he thinks even love is even fully enough.

all the things i write. the poetry and the stupid rhythmic rhymes. i think he asked to feed his ego not rly 2 see my mind. cuz i fucked up and wrote something long when we split and then he thought my long words were dramatically writ. but i write and i write for me. n whats funny is that he thought he knew me within a matter of weeks. he lies he lies he lies but oh he has widened eyes. lies so sweet bc they r not just excuses but things u withhold. to him,this world is new to behold, and to him, this world is his. n i can tell while he sips on tall glasses of beer then turning over my phone to check what time it is.

but i would be lying if i said i didnt still wait by the phone and wish drugs would make me feelsomething similar to when his name would pop up.

he jokes i was an era and a season like summer. but. leaves change and even autumn has passed us by and he makes me feel responsible for the guilt he feels inside. he says i hate him as if its an apology so i end up caring for all of the factoring probabilities. i think to myself that hating him would have made things easier. but i have grown quite exhausted pretending that i have. as if the last few months i had not woken up aching and stupidly fucking sad.

but he doesnt make me feel as good as he did when we first met and thats because things kan never be the same when u try to re do things with an 'ex'

[chelleztjs18]

Hello you mrs. clean overpacker old head lefty eyebag 😅

Yes maam, you are older. You so old, you a mtlf. Hahahaha oh sheesh I'm sorry if I crossed the line there. And you'll just be old meanie head. I haven't seen your nice side yet 🤔 just kidding just kidding.

But you really mean for doing that! Now I gotta just come up with the ending while you having fun and not writing 🤣

You got everything packed though and ready to go?

See, this is why I can't write. If I make a story, it'll start mysterious. Then I will end it with a joke or something else. My readers will go wtf hahahaha

I had a Miley phase when I was younger. But not like crazy or anything. I just love her voice. But no, I would not have played her over and over again if I work. Whenever I work in the kitchen while opening, I usually play rock alternative songs. So I can be more awake 🤣

Oh you be flirting with people on your asks?? You sly fox. Hm, she pointed it out, was she jealous? 🤔

Which do you like more though, NSync or Backstreet Boys?

My teenage years, I'm probably the same.. and Maroon 5. I love Maroon 5. I think I also listen to Maroon 5, the songs about Jane album when I am sad.

There are songs that give out sexy vibe. I have a few actually that I know on top of my head that I would play if I wanna set the mood 😅 how about you?

Okay, since we're on a song list questions. Name 3 songs that reminds you of your favorite person.

-CuriousGeorge

Hahaha wow, u just like to rub it in my face that i'm old huh? 😅🤣

Oh wow, i thought u r older than i am.. because the way u talk about backpain like u r almost 40 😅🤣

Mtlf? What is mtlf? Is it a typo from what u meant milf? Because if it is what u meant, then i will say no i'm not..😅🤣 yes i am a mom. But no, im not a milf. Because milf r hot n im not. Im far from that. 😊 but thank u.

Its okay, u didnt cross the line. I got that quite a few times in here just because of i'm a mom n my age. 😅

Haha well, u havent seen my nice side yet? Thats because i take it slow on showing how nice i am.😅 did u forget that i'm a shy person?

Yeah im already kinda packed. 1 suitcase was ready but i gotta re-arrange it.😩

I never heard of her songs, only the wrecking ball one.

Haha u can still be a writer, u can write however u wanna write even though ur follower will be "wtf" because it's ur story.

Well, i thought i wasnt flirting with people on my asks (including u) but she told me that i was.. 😅🤣 yes, she got jealous but then she understand n know i didnt mean it so she let it pass. Lol. But yeah she said that i was flirting in the ask all the time. Then i got really confused.🤣🤣

I love both of them. All their songs r good. But if i hv to pick britney or christina aguilera, i would pick britney..

Ah yeah! Maroon 5! Oh my gosh, how come i forgot about them. Yeah their songs about jane album was really good. Have u heard the accoustic album for that album yet? It's really good. Whats ur favorite of their songs? Mine is Sweetest Goodbye.. dang now i wanna listen to them.

Yes i think there are songs that's sexy. I usually listen to them when i write smut. Some of them sometimes dont have sexy lyrics but the vibe n beat give a sexy vibes. Oh okay, gimmie the songs please?maybe i will.listen to it when i write my next smut.😁

Hmm..

1. Annie's song

2. Let it go frozen soundtrack (my daughter)

3. Goodbye the saddest world (my mom)

4. Any jazz songs (my dad)

What about urs?

Next question?

Cheerio!

[willemdafazbear]

aita but Tumblrified

normally this is something I should post on reddit but I don't actually want people to see this I just want to rant. so basically my friend group (in school) consists of 3 people (I'll call them: O [female], G [male], and L [female]) plus me (white female). We all have pretty much the same classes and I've known all of them since at least middle school. Out of those 3, two of them are biracial (half black half white), and O is white. One day, either G thought it would be really funny to start telling people I said the n-word. Honestly, it was pretty funny for about a week of him telling our close friends that because they obviously knew it was a joke. L caught on and began telling people about it too. soon, they began telling not just our close friends, but classmates I haven't known for that long and random people they were friends with that I wasn't. I've never said the n word and I never will (not like that's some big accomplishment, its basic human decency). soon, the joke went much further than just "she said the n word." it became a whole joke between not just L and G, but also O that I am racist. like I said before, the joke was pretty funny at first. it escalated quickly, from them telling that to students in our classes that I have never met and haven't gotten a chance to make a first impression on yet, to telling teachers. L and G write the n word and other racial slurs for black people all over my papers and chemistry notes and act like I wrote them. sometimes when we do group projects, they sign my name as "[my name] the Racist." I've been cool with all of this for a while because obviously, L and G are black and they can say whatever slurs for black people they want. they have a right to reclaim that. it got out of hand once they wrote a poem about me though. it was called "[my name] Is Racist." basically the whole poem was about how much I supposedly hate black people. once again, had no issue with it! I didn't like it once they read it to our English teacher though. or when they told our yearbook teacher that im racist or played games of hangman on the whiteboard in front of the class where the answer was "[my name] IS RACIST." or when they told our chemistry teacher that im racist. or when they told our statistics teacher (who is the principal's wife) that im racist. and she did NOT find it funny at all. another thing they do is draw swatiskas on my paper. none of them are jewish. I've told them multiple times that that is NOT OKAY and they need to stop but they just keep doing it. they also tell people that I love hitler and that I hate jewish people. They think its hilarious and now everyone in my classes has heard the joke at some point. racist is basically my last name at this point. I don't know how to ask them to stop because its genuinely affecting my relationships with people and school. this has been going on for about 2 1/2 months now so I can't even imagine what will happen if it goes on through the whole year. tomorrow I am going to tell my statistics teacher in private that im not racist and im sorry for what they said, because that statistics class is a college credit that we take at the local community college and I don't want that to potentially ruin my chances od graduating with an associates degree.

I want to talk to my friends about it but I feel like they won't take it well because im supposed to be the friend that gets picked on all the time. you know how every friend group has the one they bully? im that friend and its okay honestly. another fun saying they came up with is "everything is [my name]'s fault" or "blame everything on [my name]." which hurts my feelings a little bit but whatever! its okay ill deal with it. it just makes me sad to see how nice they treat other people and how mean they can be to me. obviously they make fun of other people too but I've known these guys for so long and I would consider them to be the people I can trust more than anyone in this world except for my best friend (J, female). she doesn't do the same program we do so I only get to see her once a day. I tell her about all of this and she agrees that its gotten out of hand and its impacting my life in a negative way. I love her so much and she makes fun of me a little too, but mostly just about how she thinks the people I have crushes on are ugly or that she doesnt like some of my music. but she would never, EVER say things about me like this. J has a disability (she's deaf but I don't want to get into that), and she's made a joke calling me an ableist once or twice, and it was funny, but she would never tell random people or teachers/professors that I was ableist because she knows that could truly impact my life. I feel like im rambling. let me get back to the story sorry lol

anyways, I want to add one more thing. O doesnt know this, but im queer. G and L know. I haven't told O yet not because I think she's homophobic, but because she's not very good at keeping secrets and im afraid she might spill the beans. I am NOT publicly out. very few people that are in my life even know this about me (im sure everyone can probably tell lmao but I've never confirmed it). G and L are both straight. like very. they're very supporting of gay rights, which is why I felt like I could share this part of my life with them (I told them about a year ago or so). however, they went from last year being super supportive and encouraging me to go for girls I liked, to this year making a bunch of homophobic jokes about me. in front of others. they make jokes about how im going to hell, or that god hates me, or that I need to "repent" and "cleanse" myself from my "sins." I didn't care at first that much, it hurt a little but I knew it was all in good fun. but then they started making jokes about it around others and pretty much outing me, and I have to laugh it off and tell people theyre just kidding. but it hurts so bad that I want to cry because I hate lying to people and I'm a bad liar so im pretty sure they can tell that im queer. im afraid people will think im a lesbian which there isn't anything wrong with that at all, its just that im NOT a lesbian and im afraid no boy will ever approach me bc he will think im uninterested. which isn't true, I like men and women. theyre hurting my chances of ever getting a boyfriend and theyre risking me losing relationships with people or worse, getting hurt. which I don't think would happen at my school but I've heard how some people talk about the LGBT+ students in our grade and it scares me for what they might say about me. they also make jokes about my mom verbally abusing me or sending me to conversion camp or saying my mom hates me. I had a very difficult experience with my mom in middle school where I was outed and things haven't been the same since. my mom hates gay people, specifically gay women. she constantly belittles them and it makes me feel like shit. I told them this in confidentiality and I was hoping they would understand and let me confide in them bc ya know. we're friends. last year they were so understanding and let me talk about it but this year they've turned it all into one big joke and it makes me feel so awful like I genuinely feel so ill when they talk about it because getting outed was the worst experience of my life. I hate when they make jokes about me being a sinner or my mom because I love God so much and I want to be a good Christian but its a lot harder when you're LGBT+. I have a very tough time with religion and they make is so much harder on me even though I know theyre joking. but it reminds me how my mom actually would feel about me if she knew that me being queer wasn't just a phase and that I never "grew out of it" and that im still queer.

one more thing. this is kinda irrelevant but it still hurts my feelings. L and O tell everyone I have a UTI. which isn't even true! I've never had one ever but last year L came up with that joke. but it was just a joke between me and her. but this year she told O about the joke and now they tell everyone. they've actually stopped doing that for about two weeks now which im super happy about! but they told the guy I really liked and im not sure if he knew they were joking. I really liked him and I feel like that turned him away from me idk. they would tell strangers that I had a UTI too like they would tell random kids in our class whose names we didn't even know that I had a UTI and it hurt my feelings a lot. I feel like people think im dirty idk. I know a UTI doesnt mean youre dirty but I feel like many people believe in that.

basically what im trying to get at is, am the the asshole for wanting them to chill out? or should I just let them be? because I know its all in good fun and theyre just joking, but it hurts my feelings. should I ask them to stop, or should I just grow a backbone and joke along (im very sensitive so maybe im just making a big deal out of friendly behaviors. they don't know im very sensitive though because I make sure to not cry in front of people or let them know the jokes upset me.) if anyone actually takes any time to read all this and respond that would be dope! have a lovely day :D

love, willemdafazbear

(ps I didn't proofread this I just typed as I went along so sorry for any grammatical or spelling mistakes)