#this was supposed to be an easy semester | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pupkashi · 6 months

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gm friends !! i fear i will be back to being relatively ia as I’m heading back to uni today </3

i will see u guys whenever i get a chance to catch my breath after my two exams tuesday ,, bye bye <3

#also my online physics minimester starts tmrw #I’m so scared 😁#this was supposed to be an easy semester #how tf did i end up w 18 hours of primarily hard stem 😭#anyway #jess talks

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drysauce · 2 months

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i mean it in the best way possible (to u) but wow from what u've been posting ur uni friends sound like fucking cunts. hope it gets better :/

haha well, yeah no i agree with you

the thing is it's not really uni friends. those just either don't reply or reply that they're busy when it's about something esle than school, they're clear with us that they have their own friend groups they value more and outside of the university setting we don't really keep in touch too much. i mean i tried befriending one girl but it eventually backfired at me so i decided it's not worth to spend my time and health on that

the thing that's happening lately is with people i have known before for ~5 years out of which one of them is my rommate. and only around january/february this year it started becoming clear what we stand on. that's probably why the whole thing is so frustrating to me now, especially that situationship with my roommate/best friend that we ended up in. it's such a complicated and multilayered situation at this point that it's just simply more tiring than upsetting

but in any case thanks for nice words, i hope it gets better too

#the psychologist lady im meeting for personalized development exercises told me the same actually #she was like okay you're upset that they don't value you as much but do you really want to stay friends with people like who don't #the problem is that it's not that easy because i don't have anyone esle here. like at all #so my takeaway from that was that since at least when it's all good i have people around me then it's better than having no one no matter #whether it's good or bad #and when it's bad i can always type down all my annoyance into the void that is my tungle dot com blog #it's not the same as having a friend to talk about it with but it's not that awful option either i guess lol #ive been working on myself a lot this semester so im now viewing it all in a different light than those 6 months ago #and im really starting to thing that the fault for how im feeling in all on this doesn't really lie entirely on my side #because they really could've just been better friends. and people in general i suppose #but i still deeply care about them and that's probably why it's so frustrating #think* not thing goddammit autocorrect

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opens-up-4-nobody · 8 months

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#i started the semester off with such a level head but ive walked myself further and further toward i ledge i can feel crumbling #out from under my feet. i sit in small rooms where i feel the stress radiating from my chest down into my limbs. disappating into the floor #it makes me want to run and run and run but im so tired and the sidewalk is icy slick. and i feel like im at the limits of my abilities #and i know every grad student has that worry but what if its true. that i have a void behind my eyes and not enough depth of thought #anywhere it matters. how am i supposed to operate in this system when i can barely string together the words to understand what im reading #and itll never be any easier. what if im at my functional limit? what if i caught fire and burned away to ashes? what if i screamed and #kept screaming until someone told me patch up the open wound in my chest? what if i just stopped?#what if i could just let go of any need to feel like i have a purpose? what if i could just live? and feel the wonder of the things around #me. let go of all my emptiness #move at a pace that isnt breaking my neck. feel anything close to joy or if that's too much to ask then let me at least feel stable. just #for a while. just a little while.#and i know itll b fine. and i know im just being whiny bc things are hard and theyve been hard and theyll always be hard bc i refuse to make #things easy. but i just feel like im standing alone on a beach where the water's been drawn too far back #and i can see it rushing toward me faster than i can run. im just waiting for the tsunami to wash me away to nothing #unrelated

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quietautumn · 2 months

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why is online college so hit or miss. this semester i've had a class that might be one of my favorites of all time and also two of the absolute worst classes i've ever experienced.

#crow caws #i'm so pissed rn i just got another low grade in my spanish class because my rude as hell professor keeps accusing me of reading during my #video assignments when i'm not supposed to???? i'm literally not reading btw and she has yet to explain what makes her think i am.#and she never offers me any way to redo anything so i'm just stuck with low grades on easy assignments.#i've had this prof twice during the time i've attended this school and she's done this before. like why is she beefing with me.......#and my chem class is probably worse because the prof clearly doesn't give a shit and never gives clear instructions.#sorry for the random rant i'm just mad. so glad the semester is almost over and i'm probably graduating i hate this school so much 💔

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lmanburs · 2 years

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There truly is no greater joy in life than completely bullshitting a discussion board post by dumping as many multi-syllable words into a sentence as possible. I am a whole paragraph in and I have done nothing but restate the prompt.

#losing my mind rn this was supposed to be my easy class to coast through the semester with #laurel.txt

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maeamian · 2 years

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It's been more than a decade, but I still can't believe that we had a bonus question on my Quantum Mechanics II final that was just 'what's the potential in an infinite square well', a question you answer before you even start formally doing quantum as a class, but only if you realized that x^2n was an infinite square well as n went to infinity. It was worth 50% of the final which was, in turn, 50% of the grade for the class, I pulled a cool 25% free grade just by spotting the trick in the trick question which is great cause I had concert tickets for a Great Big Sea show after it, so I was rushing that badboy and did not want to do hard math any more than necessary.

#lmao I pulled a B+ in that class off a 12% homework grade because I aced the final and that question in particular #Like if I tried to work that shit out via integrals and limits I woulda been there all day #But instead I was like 'hey look at the behavior of the well oh look it's extremely obvious'#You did have to catch that the width was 2 instead of 1 but that's basically it #Just like a shockingly easy problem to be asking after two semesters of quantum but only if you caught the trick #Which I suppose catching the trick is a talent in and of itself #But like this was something I learned along side everyone in that class in Quantum and Classic Waves #Which is Modern Physics in many departments and a general prereq for quantum #Strong visualization skills were always my strength tho and thinking that one out visually rather than mathematically was the key

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spinsterennui · 2 years

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really hate the beginning of january

#the end of xmas is super depressing for me #idk why but it is #and then beginning of the semester this year sucks extra #bc they fucked me over about the lit class #plus i fucking stupidly agreed to resubmit that paper #so that’s just sitting there causing me a ridiculous amount of stress #and my birthday looms #which i should be over the getting old thing but sometimes it’s not as easy as others #and i’m supposed to be focusing on positive things #and obviously failing miserably #at least it’s not hot out this morning #recently it’s been like almost 70 and humid every day #today it’s only going to get to 60 i think #note sarcastic tone with “only”#sigh . . .#don’t mind me just in a super bitchy mood today #🥺

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rorygilmre · 2 years

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I FINISHED MY LAST FINAL. MY SEMESTER IS OFFICIALLY OVER. i am 2 glasses of wine into celebrating. i might have a vodka redbull because i have to stay up all night. and then i’m definitely drinking at the airport bar at 5am.

#i am CELEBRATING #this was a tough semester okay #and this last final was supposed to be the most difficult but it felt easy as hell #so i’m rewarding myself by drinking a little more than usual #leah goes to college

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orcelito · 2 years

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uhm. uhmmm. ladue chapter 18 sure is the goal.

... though im still kinda in the mood for angst. this is a problem.

#speculation nation #ladue shit #me writing that one shot & posting it like 'phew! surely this will get it out of my system'#... apparently not.#im sooooooo close. so fucking close to finishing ladue chapter 18 #but it requires a Heart To Heart kinda thing and i am Not feeling that vulnerability rn #im just tired and annoyed in general. and that manifests as wanting to write angst.#maybe this will change after i get my tax return. i can start Living It Up #(paying off debt and not having to calculate expenses down to the dollar!)#im just like. hm. we'll see if my mood changes enough to work on the ladue chapter 18 #but i have been introduced to the ease of one-shots. like holy Fucking shit that was really easy to write #im used to writing fics being a fucking massive undertaking. but i wrote that in literally 2 sittings.#... i could also write a continuation of ce n'est rien #though idk. it's supposed to just sit within canon. a peek into his life #OH oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh i just remembered an idea i had for 3rd semester and omfg #hm. hmmmm #oh yes that would hurt Quite a lot actually.#not entirely original but neither is my 11/20 fic. it's about what i do with the idea that makes it new #well i might have a new severely angsty one shot to write soon. We'll See

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vamptastic · 3 months

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i never finished don quixote i read like 80 pages of it whilst heavily relying on the side by side english translation and it was very good but also my spanish is just not on the level to where i can fully understand most sentences in it the first time i read them or without checking the translation.

#idk how ppl pick up languages through media it's so hard #idk encountering the same words repeatedly kinda helps but those r also words i already. knew.#bc i did take Spanish for uhhh 4 years and was supposed to take a class studying this book but couldn't for schedule reasons #so it's kinda like. it's helping a little and it's also just a good read obviously. but what i need to work on w Spanish is way more like #listening comprehension and my pronunciation more than reading #also oh my god i got SO much worse at grammer i don't remember ANYTHING #i want to take smth easy to balance out my maths next spring semester and i think i should take Spanish maybe

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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year

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#ok so like this is fine bc im not in a horrible mood rn. this is more i feel like complaining bc what im doing is kinda ridiculous #but my memory is so bad that ill probably forget if i dont write it out. but basically 4 days a week i have to come in starting at 7.30 to #water and prep for measurements. then from 9am to 6.15pm i have to nonstop take the measurements. and theyre timed so that means #i get abt 4 min to do anything before i have to take another measurement. which is abt enough time to start to focus and then have to stop #which is very fucking frustrating. and i have to manage data. coordinate for this fucking paper. and keep track of like 10 other things for #work stuff. which means that it takes me like and hour to send easy emails and they come out all fucked uo bc my brain is so shot #but on top of that i also have to fucking do the steps to get set up for my new school in the fall. and like ive officially accepted the #offer but havent talked to my new advisor since then so now theres this weird gap where im like. uh fuck do i ask for wtf im supposed to #do? bc ive been able to do things for like 2 or 3 weeks but then my life started collapsing in around me. and like there r probably #instructions somewhere but i cant fucking read lol. whatever. hes nice i just need to find the energy and words to email him and b like lol #srry everythings been insane. but bc ive waited so long i have to compulsively keep going back to check that ive been accepted like somehow #that would change while im not looking. ugh. and ive also fucked myself over housing wise bc theres a housing shortage in the city and huge #demand of housing on camus so theres a wait list for everything but i cant fucking apply bc i cant get my id to work. and fucking idk who #to call or email abt that. but idk i might have to have roomates for a semester. or my parents offered to give me some extra money for an #apartment until i can get one that doesnt put me in the red on a grad student budget. ugh. i dont wanna do either of those things #but christ do i not want roommates. ill figure something out. its just annoying and difficult from so far away #and it makes me kinda sad bc ppl r like: r u excited?! and im like. i cant really think abt that. partly bc im constanly putting out fires #in the present so theres not really space for it. partly bc i dont allow myself to b excited abt things so as not to get my hopes up.#but just after i accepted i was excited. and now it feels like im reaching my hand out toward a floating light just out of reach. like #its a nice idea but i wont believe until it happens. but that just bc ive become distorted about things #and i dont even get a weekend bc the 4 days of measurement r friday to Monday and i cant fucking relax on weekdays bc ppl r like hey can u #do this??? and there r things i can only do on weekdays so its like ok i guess ill just suffer forever thrn. and my boss texts me like: hey #did u do X? and am like: uuuuuh i fucking dont kno what day it is anymore. i dont understand y we have to meet. lets just not talk bc im #afraid ill say something worrying. so yea its pretty fucked up rn. but this stuff ends on the 24th #then ill probably not take a break and fucking finish the measurements for another project bc i just really need it to b done. i need it #all to b done so i can fucking wash my hands of this and fucking quit and move away at the start of july... or August if i decide i hate #myself that much. ugh. at least the lab has been pretty empty so no ones seen me crying lol #also thr fucking rutgers guy emailed me yesterday like: hey u want this position? and im like bitch u r like a month too late also im in #my cringe fail era. i would not survive at ur school. ugh everything is terrible. 2 or 3 more months then i csn leave this place forever #unrelated

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skrunksthatwunk · 8 months

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i need to get up i need to read i have a quiz in an hour i need to get up i need to read i have a quiz in an hour ive been skipping half the readings i have a quiz in an hour i need to get out of bed i have a quiz i have a quiz i have a quiz i need to

#fuckk ughh #i skipped one of my classes twice this week and i wanna skip this one so bad #not because i dislike it i just. brain. and i havent been doing the readings and it's a lit class #but i need to catch up but it's so much to catch up on because ive been half assing them so i dont start so i need to read more and hhhhggh #it's so stupid why can't i just. function. ughh my impulse control is so bad #it's not supposed to be this bad this early into the semester nothing im doing is hard it's all so fucking easy im just. aughhhggh #whatever #i should probably eat something shouldnt i. pshh

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star-mum · 11 months

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Rant

i have been stressed, overwhelmed and always exhausted for days, if not weeks, on end.

So, I dont really care if not wanting to spend money and time I dont have to go fucking bOWLING 7:30 PM THE WEEKEND BEFORE A SEMINAR PRESENTATION MAKES ME A SHITTY FRIEND

#happy bday tho #like im sorry im so jaded and reclusive but GOD PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE #we had to say almost 2 hours standing in a hot stuffy space for that FORSAKEN CIENTIFIC JOURNEY SHIT #i literally cannot take this anymore #there were so many ppl just stuff there like a pack of sardines I have to yell for someone right next to me to hear me #AND i had to repeat the same lenghty explanation like 5 different times #i know end of semesters are chaos incarnate but tHIS IS NOT NORMAL #im always tired and annoyed #and it takes me FOREVER to write shit thats supposed to be easy #I DONT HAVE TIME FOR FUCK ALL #OR EVEN REGULAR HOBBIES #I LITERALLY SIT IN FRONT OF THE COMPUTER FROM THE MOMENT I WAKE UP TO THE TIME I GOTTA GET READY FOR CLASS #YEAH IM COMPLANING EVEN THO I DONT EVEN HAVE A FUCKING JOB #YES I KNOW I HAVE MUCH EASIER THAN A LOT OF PEOPLE #INCLUDING PPL IN MY CLASS #IM STILL ALLOWED TO COMPLAIN #i literally do NOT know how ppl do this on top of a full time job #jesus fucking christ #Hydration Reminder: keeping up with star-mum but everytime I have the sudden urge to start bawling my eyes out you drink some water ! : D #should I be in therapy? Yes.#Should I propably be going after an adhd diagnosis? ALSO YES #guess what the clinic was meant to call me back to lmk if they had opening and I only noticed they hadnt after 3 fucking months #which... helps my point but its also VERY counter productive #star is a bad friend :p #star rants

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punk-in-metal-detector · 1 year

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when you choose a difficult field that you have almost no knowledge in and then are surprised it is difficult

(also ignore the missing s in professor I wrote it in czech)

#i really wish the homeworks remained this easy the entire semester #in the meantime if anyone figures out how am I supposed to construct a triangle with the longest side measuring 150cm and the circumference #measuring 490cm please let me know because I have no idea #ig I need to discover a new dimension or something for it to work #programming #university

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15000bugs · 1 year

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bro having a 9% in my cultural rhetorics class does NOT feel good 😭

#i forgot to do an assignment and theres only two assignments in the gradebook rn #the one i did is 1 point and the one i didnt do is 10 points #kms #anyway #i have discussion post responses due tomorrow for that class and i was checking them #and someone responded to me post making fun of me because i forgot to do the citation exactly like i was supposed to 😀#i really hope the professor doesnt take extra points off for that #i DID cite it #i just didnt do it parenthetically #i put it in-text instead #but now i cant even edit it bc this smug asshole replied to it making fun of me #like not even point it out in a nice way #‘you didnt cite your source as the assignment requires!’#this made me suicidal hope you know that mckenna ❤️🫶#jk jk jk joke (its not a joke)#anyway i really hope i dont get points docked #i need to get my grade up asap #finishing the semester with anything below a B in this class will kill me i think #its an easy ass class im just. Depressed 🫶

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cappurrccino · 1 year

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i was gonna make a list of things i need to get done today as a like. "hah! maybe if i put it where other people can see what i need to finish i'll be able to hold myself accountable to completing tasks" but um. there's. there's too many things, i think... :(

#//juri speaks #i need to do stuff for a scholarship and like 3 different things to prep for graduation/final semester in the fall #plus i need to make progress on at least one big end-of-semester project #would LOVE to just knock the grant proposal out but i don't think that's feasible with all the everything else #and THEN there's still laundry and dishes and the litterbox and vacuuming and menu planning and grocery shopping #and i had ALSO wanted to get some crafting done but. i maaaaay not be able to do that today #which sucks #i just wanna have a cool box for all my spell cards >:(#gonna just. go throw laundry in and eat some breakfast i suppose #the graduation stuff should be. easy. in terms of just sending emails and shit but it's terrifying and therefore taxing :\#i wanna have my degree but also i'm not ready to stop being a student y'know?#and once i set in stone that fall is my final semester i'll actually have to start figuring out the practicum stuff #which is DOUBLY scary bc my advisor is. not the most helpful.

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