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uncloseted · 3 years

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EFFY’S CLOSET WATCHES SKINS: 306 "Naomi"

Surprise! After a 10 month break (sorry, everyone!) I'm back with a new Skins recap. This episode focuses on Naomi, and I know it's a favorite for a lot of you. Apologies in advance if the images disappear- Tumblr added a rule that you can only have 10 images in a text post that I’m trying to get around.

The episode opens on Naomi sleeping in her bedroom. She's still and at peace until... a foot finds its way to her mouth. Naomi sputters on it, and says "Jesus Christ!" Even in her bedroom, which is supposed to be her personal space, she isn't really allowed to just be. "Who the fuck are you?" she says, to which the man responds that he had nowhere to sleep and that Naomi's mum is nice, even if she doesn't believe he's the actual Messiah. Naomi starts complaining (rightly) about how nobody understands privacy anymore, until she realizes that she sleeps naked, and this man is staring at her naked body. She grabs her clothes and storms off in an attempt to find her mother. When she does, we discover that it's none other than Academy Award winner Olivia Coleman (!!!) who does such a great job in this part.

Naomi's mum (I'm pretty sure her name is Gina?) is sitting at the kitchen table, discussing how bananas have an aggressive shape and texture and are "positively patriarchal". Naomi, intent on starting a fight, asks her mother if "anyone has told [her] what a complete fucking cow [she] is", to which her mum replies, "plenty of people", and then asks Naomi if she thinks they should ban bananas from the group shopping list.

I love this scene, because it quickly tells us so many of the things we need to know to understand Naomi. Her mother is a fierce feminist who has a rotating cast of characters living with her at all times and who doesn't really respect her daughter's feelings. Naomi never has any privacy, even in her own house. It starts to make sense why she's so politically active but emotionally closed off. Naomi grabs the banana and takes a giant bite out of it. Olivia Coleman looks wonderfully disturbed by it.

The camera switches to focus on Emily, who is eagerly waiting for Naomi to arrive at school. She looks a little bit nervous and hesitant, but excited. I think in her mind, she and Naomi are at least sort of dating, given that they hooked up at the pajama party and went to the pub quiz night together. Whereas for Naomi, she feels like her whole life is chaotic, and if she lets Emily in, it will only become more chaotic. Like Effy, Naomi is incredibly afraid of getting hurt. She believes that Emily is the one person with the power to ruin her life, and so she’s constantly pushing Emily away.

Naomi appears in the crowd looking disgusted and upset, but Emily doesn't seem to see her, or maybe she's waiting for Naomi to approach her first. I think Emily knows that if she pushes too hard, she'll scare Naomi away, and so she's giving Naomi the opportunity to engage with her on her own terms. Maybe Emily is willing to take it slow, because she knows Naomi likes her as much as she likes Naomi.

Instead, the scene changes once again, this time to Naomi sitting on some bleachers and smoking a cigarette. Kieran, the politics teacher, sits down next to her and inquires as to whether he's late. Naomi assures him that he's not, and anyway, this is hardly an appointment. Naomi doesn't seem to have a dad, at least, not one we see in the show (at least, not yet), and I think she views Kieran as a father figure in her life. He notices her for who she is- someone who's unique and interesting and clever- in a way that I don't think the other adults in Naomi's life do. She's so surrounded by a revolving door of randoms that her mother takes in that Kieran is the only adult who pays attention to her. Kieran inquires about her mum, and Naomi says that "sometimes she's up, and sometimes she's down...fifteen people are living in my house, and none are paying rent." It seems that Naomi's mum is another source of inconsistency in Naomi's life, another person contributing to the chaos that she feels.

"Still, can't be all bad. She made you, didn't she?" Kieran replies, and it feels like the type of thing a dad should say. Naomi looks pleased with this assessment. Unlike her relationship with her mum or with Emily, her friendship with Kieran is easy and uncomplicated. He’s one of the only people who doesn’t add chaos to her life, who just makes her feel better about everything that’s going on. He’s one of the only people who she trusts to just want to be her friend, especially in a world where she views both Cook and Emily as just trying to get into her pants.

The episode continues with everyone gathered in the common area. We see that Thomas is now suddenly a student at Roundview instead of the janitor, which never really gets acknowledged as a plot point. Effy is gazing longingly at Freddie, in a kind of, “what the fuck am I going to do about this situation” way. Freddie’s giving her a look that’s still very much like, “you slept with my best friend after I told you you loved me, what the fuck?” Naomi asks “what’s going on there,” to which Effy quickly replies, “nothing” and then tells Pandora to shut up before she can spill the beans about the fact that Effy Stonem actually has feelings. This interaction is interesting to me, because it means that Effy told Pandora what happened with Freddie.

Effy turns around to look at Cook, in her customary manner of deflecting her feelings for Freddie by spending time with his best friend, but Cook is surrounded by a group of blonde girls and describing his penis. Effy leaves in somewhat of a huff, I think maybe because Cook isn’t available to help her pretend like she doesn’t have feelings.

Emily enters, having finally found an appropriate moment to talk to Naomi, totally unfazed by the fact that Naomi was maybe ignoring her earlier. Naomi rolls her eyes at Emily. She’s a little bit scared of what it means that Emily is sitting there, a little bit guilty about ignoring Emily earlier, but also secretly a bit pleased. They have a moment of awkward tension before the lights go out. Doug dramatically announces that they’re holding elections for a student president for Roundview, and Emily and Naomi share a look of “what the fuck?”. Emily looks over to Naomi and gives her a little tap on the leg, like, “you should do it,” to which Naomi shakes her head. Kieran is standing in the background, disaffectedly eating a banana.

Emily, not about to give up on the woman she loves, tries to convince Naomi to run for school president, saying that she doesn’t get why Naomi isn’t interested. “You really care about this stuff!…equality, environmentalism, feminism, I don’t ever want to shut my mouth-ism…”. I like how Emily feels she can poke fun at Naomi just a little bit in this moment, since she seems so aware of not pushing Naomi too far in their other interactions. Undeterred by Naomi’s protests, Emily continues to hype her up, “you know about politics, you’re always talking about it!” Naomi deflects with, “Emily. We’ve had about three conversations our entire lives. So the idea that you know I’m always talking about anything is ridiculous.” Emily’s relentless positivity disappears, and she walks away. Cook enters and tells Naomi that she should “see more cock” and that they should “go at it”.

I’ve said this in previous recaps, but I think that up until the end of this episode, Cook was romantically interested in Naomi, not Effy. I think this is his attempt to get Naomi to fall for him. We see him go back and forth between total seriousness and jokes in these interactions, trying to get Naomi to crack a smile. Naomi looks disgusted at the prospect of sleeping with Cook, but then unwittingly makes a bet with Cook that if he can win the student president, she’ll sleep with him. Cook immediately goes to register to run for the election, while Naomi peeks through the door to see if he’s actually doing it. She gets knocked over by Crispin (just Crispin), the other candidate, as he opens the door. Cook comes out after Crispin, and points out that he can “see [Naomi’s] knickers.” Cook reiterates his interest in Naomi, Naomi reiterates her total lack of interest in cock, and walks away, flipping Cook off. I think Cook thinks that Naomi is joking around, the same way he is, to deflect having to admit that she’s interested in him. She is doing that… but to Emily, not Cook.

Kieran offers to give Naomi a ride home, but his car is broken, so they end up walking. Naomi is wearing tights under her dress now, as if she knew she might feel insecure about how short her skirt was or that she might get negative attention, so she prepared for it. Naomi totally trusts Kieran. They have a sweet conversation where Kieran tells her about a time he ran for public office, and then tells her she should run for school president. Again, it’s a very dad thing to do. He believes in her- “you’re the best, we both know it,” to which she bashfully responds, “is that a compliment? Are you complimenting me?” Naomi is not someone who accepts compliments easily, so the fact that she’s willing to take it from Kieran says a lot. Naomi turns to go inside, walks off-screen, and then comes back to sheepishly grab the school president form from Kieran with the smallest little “thanks”. She clearly takes his opinion of her seriously.

Naomi walks into the chaos that’s her house. We get a hilarious interaction between a feminist and the guy who thinks he’s Jesus: “How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? One. Me. Because I’m oppressed, yeah? You’re oppressing me!” “The Messiah does not oppress, ok? He enlightens.” “Yeah? I’ll fucking enlighten you, you patriarchal prick!” Naomi goes to talk to her Mum. Olivia Coleman tries for a nice, non-confrontational interaction with Naomi, but she’s determined to be upset. Naomi’s mum says that it’s “nice to see her with a guy, it’s a nice change,” to which Naomi looks down and smirks, because she knows that she’s gay and in love with Emily, even if she doesn’t want to believe it.

Naomi storms upstairs, saying, “Jesus, is there never any peace?”. That’s really what Naomi wants- an escape from the chaos in her life. The answer to this is no, because Emily is sitting primly on Naomi’s bed, and Emily is the most chaotic factor of all. Emily says that the guy who looks like Jesus let her in, and I’m curious how long she’s been sitting here waiting for Naomi to get home. Naomi is immediately on the defensive. She crosses her arms and asks, “what do you want?”, but Emily is determined not to take the bait. “I wanted to give you this,” she says, and she hands Naomi the school president form. Naomi calls Emily annoying, to which Emily calmly responds, “you seem to inspire it in me.” Emily offers to help with the form, but Naomi says she doesn’t need any help. I think Naomi feels like if she accepts help- from her mum, from the community of people living in her house, from Kieran, from Emily- then she’ll grow to rely on those people and run the risk of losing them later on. She can’t have that, so instead she puts walls up to keep people out from the start.

Emily’s feelings are clearly hurt at this point. She’s trying to hard to be mindful of Naomi’s feelings, to push just enough that Naomi will acknowledge that there’s something between them but not so much that she scares Naomi away, but this time she miscalculated and pushed too far. As much as Emily is trying not to take Naomi’s hesitance to spend any time with her personally, because she knows Naomi does like her, she just needs time, Emily can only be brave and accommodating for so long. She starts to leave, but her hurt feelings get the better of her. She turns around to tell Naomi, “Just so you know, when I see you, my first thought is not: I want to fuck that girl. We’ve kissed. Twice. And it was nice. But it’s also nice just being with you — when you’re not being a prick, that is…You should run for president because I think you’d be good at it. It’s that simple, OK?”

Naomi is a bit shocked, and scared of what this means. This is confirmation that Emily doesn’t just want her sexually, but emotionally, too. Emily wants to be her friend first and foremost. She wants to be someone Naomi can trust. Naomi tells Emily she should stay. Emily immediately takes her up on the offer, because Emily is nothing if not brave, and she flounces back into Naomi’s room. This is something Naomi has been waiting for-and resisting- since she was twelve, and now she’s finally letting it happen.

Emily and Naomi lie on the bedroom floor, head to foot, drinking and joking about different campaign slogans Naomi might adopt. Naomi’s guard is finally down. She’s being giggly and soft and a little bit lame. This is a side of Naomi that we haven’t seen until right now, a side that doesn’t feel like she has to be a sarcastic bitch. Someone who knows that Emily could ruin her life, but trusts that Emily won’t. Someone who knows that sometimes, we can find peace in other people when we can’t create it for ourselves.

“Do you think I can do it?” Naomi asks, and Emily responds, “I think you can do anything.” Emily wholeheartedly believes that Naomi can do anything, that she’s perfect the way that she is, that she’s smart enough and strong enough to make her dreams come true. She believes that it’s okay to try, even if you might fail. And indeed, that’s what Emily is doing in this scene. She doesn’t know how it will work out, but for Emily, it’s better to try being with Naomi than to always wonder what would have happened if she made a move. Naomi is scared of the way that Emily sees her, because she can’t see herself that way. I think she doesn’t want to start relying on Emily for that belief in herself, because what if Emily changes her mind? What if the person Naomi is underneath all that snark isn’t brave or smart or strong? What if Naomi is right about herself, and Emily finds out? Emily makes Naomi feel like a better person, and Naomi doesn’t want to lose that.

But Emily thinks that Naomi can do anything, and in this moment, that’s enough to give Naomi the courage to make the next move. "I’ve been wondering … what do lesbians do? I mean … in bed,” she asks Emily. Emily takes a drink of vodka straight from the bottle, not totally ready to have this conversation, and tells Naomi that she doesn’t know. “Of course” she’s never been with a girl, because Emily has been waiting for Naomi just as long as Naomi’s been waiting for her. Their first time together will be both of their first times. “We just do what we do to ourselves, only to each other, probably slightly more aggressively, and, you know, with …oilz and stuff,” Emily says, and note the pronoun switch. Emily says, “we” as in, her and Naomi. It’s what they’ll do to each other when Naomi is ready. Naomi is wearing a shirt that says, “innocence” here, which I think is telling. Even though she works hard to be a sarcastic bitch, someone who knows everything about everything, she’s innocent and unexperienced in this regard. Their laughing stops, and there’s a moment of tension. Naomi wants to initiate a kiss, but Emily’s not going to let that happen. She promised Naomi that she was there to be her friend, so that’s what she’s going to be.

Naomi wakes up the next morning with Emily in her bed. They’re sleeping back to back, as if they both made a conscious effort not to get too close. Instead of cuddling Emily, Naomi is cuddling the bottle of vodka. She reaches out to touch Emily’s hair, delicately, intimately, as if she can only be so vulnerable when Emily is asleep. She quickly pulls her hand away and mutters to herself, “fuck’s sake”, because she knows she’s let her guard down a little bit too far. Emily snuggles further into the blankets, while Naomi sneaks off to school.

At school, Cook has launched his campaign for school president in the form of a giant Che Guevara type banner with Cook’s face on it. “I think I lost him,” Freddie says. “JJ?” Naomi asks. “Yeah, him too,” Freddie replies. Freddie cares so deeply about Cook. No matter how many times Cook hurts him, Freddie can’t help caring, because Cook is like his brother. He always has been. And it’s hard for Freddie, because he’s angry at Cook about Effy, but mostly, I think he just wants Cook to be okay and it upsets him that he can’t do anything to make that happen. “It should make a difference when someone loves you. Shouldn’t it?” asks Freddie. It should make a difference to Effy that Freddie loves her. But it should also make a difference to Cook that Freddie loves him. And it should also make a difference to their relationship that Effy clearly loves Freddie, too. And it should make a difference for Naomi that Emily loves her. It should prevent her from abandoning this relationship before it starts.

(sorry for the tiny gif but look how cute Emily is!)

Emily catches up to Naomi. Emily’s skirt and bag match Naomi’s top. Emily confronts Naomi, gently but firmly, “you left pretty early.” Naomi deflects, saying that she had things to do, but Emily persists. “I met your mum, she’s nice.” Naomi calls her mum a cliche, but Emily says that she’s a nice cliche. Emily is determined to be positive about Naomi’s life, so that Naomi can see the things she should be positive about, too. Naomi isn’t having it- she’s too afraid that if she sees the positives, they’ll be taken away from her. That if other people see the positives in her life, it only creates a standard she won’t be able to live up to. Naomi starts talking, presumably to dump Emily, but Emily interjects. “I forgot to tell you. I made these in anticipation. Cool, huh? I got the message, Naomi. I’ll manage. But there’s one thing, though. Well, you can’t let him win now, can you?” Emily is being mature about this. She knows that this was big for Naomi, and that it’s okay to back off a little, to not scare Naomi away. She understands Naomi so deeply that she doesn’t feel like she needs to be worried. She’s brave enough to let Naomi go for the moment, because she knows that Naomi is hers, and that she’ll come back.

A campaign montage starts. At lunch, Naomi goes into the cafeteria, hands Emily her bag, and gets up on the table to talk about the issues facing Roundview College. Emily looks up at her proudly, because Naomi is taking charge and going after what she wants. Naomi fails to understand that nobody other than her cares about the issues. Cook interrupts to hand out apples and pears. Naomi calls him a joke, to which Cook responds, “I’m a joke? You’re fucking hilarious!… What’s so good about caring? No-one here cares. We just wanna party!” This is interesting to me, because Cook is fundamentally doing this to try and woo Naomi. But his competitive side takes over so fully that he says things that are ultimately against his end goal (sleeping with Naomi).

Emily steps in to ask Cook if he could “be a cunt over there, do you think?” And this is a step too far, but Emily just couldn’t help herself. The woman she loves was being mocked. Cook says, “Ah! That’s nice. Getting your girlfriend to hold your hand. Bit of moral support, yeah? Sweet, isn’t it?” And maybe that’s what this is about for him. Cook can tell that Naomi and Emily are getting closer, and he’s angry about it. He knows that he doesn’t have a chance with Naomi, not really, and he can see now that she’s been in love with Emily this whole time. But when Cook can’t have what he wants, he’s determined to make everyone around him miserable, too.

Naomi is clearly upset. This is what she was afraid of- she chased after what she wanted, but she got rejected because she’s not good enough, and the person she loves most get caught in the crossfire. Emily goes to apologize, worried that she’s ruined their fledgling relationship for real this time, but Naomi isn’t having any of Emily’s apologies. Instead, she goes to Kieran, her father figure, for comfort in this confusing situation. Despite her tough exterior, Naomi is vulnerable and sensitive. She just wants someone to make her feel better about everything. And it works for a second. Kieran makes her laugh, and says, “you look so much prettier when you smile.” Naomi says, “I don’t get it. Why are you so nice and all other men are such wankers?” I think she’s hoping he’ll say what a dad would say. He’s nice to her because he cares about her and wants to protect her and thinks she’s the best. Instead, he says, “now you’ve got me,” and tries to kiss her. This is the last thing Naomi wanted. She says, “ugh, you’re old enough to be my dad!”, and that’s the point. She’s upset because he was meant to be her dad but instead he did this. Then she says, “I wanted to trust you.” Naomi is so desperate for someone she can trust without having to worry about how it will impact her. She thought this was the one person who could be that for her, because what else could he be? And so her last safe place, the last person she felt peace with, is gone.

Naomi goes home and cries. For the first time, her bedroom is finally empty. It’s what she wanted at the beginning of the episode. To be alone with her feelings in her bedroom. But that’s not really what she wants anymore. She cries because she thought she had a father figure, but really he was trying to sleep with her the whole time, and because Cook made a joke of her in front of the school, and because her mum doesn’t care about her and there’s a houseful of strangers and because Emily got caught in the crossfire of Cook’s cruelty, and as much as she wants to, Naomi can’t stop wanting to be with Emily. She’s angry at herself for not having more self-control. Then she finds a note that Emily left- “Emily slept here”. This is too much for Naomi. Even in her bedroom, even when she’s totally alone, she can’t get rid of Emily. She crumples the note up, throws it across the room, and then immediately goes to retrieve it. She smooths it out, and falls asleep with it on her pillow. When she wakes up, Emily’s note is stuck to her cheek, and Emily’s name is printed on her face. Printed on her face the way it’s been printed on her heart for all these years. She tenderly touches Emily’s name, then rubs at her cheek, desperately trying to get the ink off, before accepting that no matter what she does, she’ll belong to Emily. She’s tried denying her feelings for Emily all these years, but it’s not working. The one person who she can actually trust, who wants to be her friend, who believes in her, is the person she’s been pushing away. So finally, she reaches out. For the first time, she goes to Emily instead of Emily finding her. She calls Emily and pleads, “can we go somewhere? Anywhere.”

The scene changes, and Naomi and Emily are biking down a dirt road. The song here is excellent, both as a song but also as a choice for this scene. It’s called “Jump In” by High Places, and the lyrics are “If you never take the first step/You cannot go too far/I’m sure you know that/You strike me as a smart kid/And you've got big plans/And big dreams/And big big goals/So get a move on/Jump in.” This suits Naomi perfectly. In everything in her life, she’s afraid to take the first step. She was afraid to run for school president. She was afraid to initiate things with Emily. But until she takes that first step, she’s not going to be able to achieve her goals of combating injustice or being with the woman that she loves. She has to jump in, and that’s what she’s been doing this whole episode. She ran for class president even though she was scared. She reached out to Emily. And she can jump in because she knows Emily will be by her side, reminding her that she’s a “smart kid with big plans and big dreams and big goals,” and that, as they say later in the song, Emily is “so impressed because you’ve done your best” and that together they can “get so much more done before the day is done.”

Emily is clearly not great at riding a bike. She keeps wobbling. But Emily Fitch is brave, and if Naomi needs to bike to feel better, then that’s what they’ll do. It makes sense to me why they switch to driving a moped next season. Naomi rides up in front and then looks back to make sure Emily is okay. They ride down to a lake which is beautifully green against Emily’s red hair. Naomi looks truly at peace here. They sit, quietly, calmly, serenely. Naomi says, “it’s lovely,” and clearly she means Emily is lovely, because she quickly covers it up with, “it’s a lovely place.” Beacon of bravery that she is, Emily begins to take off her clothes. Naomi protests that she didn’t bring a swimming costume, and Emily says that she didn’t either, but the sun won’t shine forever. Naomi continues protesting, saying that someone might be looking, and Emily responds, “honey, your body ain’t that special.” This is a lie, of course. But she’s here to be Naomi’s friend, so this is her attempt to put Naomi at ease. They don’t have to do anything if Naomi doesn’t want to. They can go at Naomi’s pace.

Naomi asks Emily not to look, but of course, Emily sneaks a peak, because Naomi’s body is that special to her. Naomi laughs and tells Emily that she wasn’t supposed to look, and they start play fighting until Naomi pushes Emily into the water. In turn, Emily coaxes Naomi into the water. She encourages Naomi to jump in, the way she has been all episode. Just like Effy in the previous episode, Naomi takes a leap of faith that this will all work out, and jumps into the water. For both Naomi and Effy, jumping into the water is a baptism. It’s a rebirth. They want to be made new again, to be people who believe in love and believe in themselves. This scene of them in the lake was actually meant to be longer, but Kathryn got hypothermia from how cold the water was, so they had to cut the rest. You can see her swimming to the edge and coughing.

Naomi and Emily sit by the fire, drinking vodka. Naomi says, “you all right, Em?” and it’s sweet that Naomi is using a nickname. When Emily doesn’t repsond, Naomi waves her hand in Emily’s face, “helloooooo?” In this moment, she needs to know that Emily is having fun, that Emily likes her, that Emily still thinks she’s good and smart and pretty, that everything is going to be okay. Emily says, “You know, that’s the first time you’ve asked me something.” (This is actually not true- we’ve seen Naomi ask Emily questions before). I think Emily knows that Naomi is anxious and wants confirmation that Emily likes her, because Emily understands Naomi. But she’s not going to give that comfort so easily. She needs Naomi to know, just a little bit, that Naomi needs to work too if this relationship is going to be successful. “No. I’m having the worst time of my life. Weather’s shit. Company’s even worse,” Emily says. But then, “it’s peaceful.” Emily knows that’s what Naomi wants- to be at peace- and she knows that it’s not just the scenery that’s peaceful. It’s the fact that they’re there together.

“Do you want to do blowbacks?” Emily asks, and I swear this has become a lesbian trope since Skins premiered. Naomi has her guard up again, saying that she’s all-seeing and she already knows that blowbacks are shit. Emily convinces her, once again, to jump in. To try something new. Naomi says, “ah, go ahead, disappoint me,” and we know that this is her fear. That Emily will disappoint her, or be disappointed in her, and leave. Disappoint her, the way her father has disappointed her, her mother has disappointed her, Kieran has disappointed her.

Naomi leans forward, fully initiating this time, and kisses Emily. Emily lets Naomi reach out, lets Naomi come to her this time. She promised Naomi she would be her friend, so she’s letting Naomi set the pace. Naomi jumps in all on her own this time, letting go of her fears, allowing herself to be at peace. Naomi says, “say something”. She needs to know that things are going to be okay, because this is the thing she’s wanted the most but also the thing she’s been the most scared of. Emily responds, “I’m all about experiments, me.” It’s a lie, one that’s meant to put Naomi at ease. It can be as much or as little as Naomi wants. They’re going at her pace. In this moment, I think Emily is afraid of breaking the spell, of pushing too hard now that she’s so close. They resume kissing, and discover what exactly it is that lesbians do in bed.

The song in the background here is also perfect- it’s “Believer” by Susanna and the Magical Orchestra. It goes, “Didn’t think you would trust me/Thought you would see what I see/This day has been good for me too/but I can’t stay/you know why/didn’t want to end like this/though I might could convert…you are a believer/I am not.” Naomi didn’t think Emily could ever trust her. She thought Emily would see her the way she sees herself. But Emily believes in her, more than Naomi believes in herself, and as much as she wants to believe in herself, too, she can’t convert. So she feels like she has to end what she has with Emily, because she can’t believe. Not in herself, not in the love they have, not that everything will be okay in the end.

The scene changes to the next morning, and Naomi is once again leaving Emily behind, afraid of her feelings. In this moment, Emily is done being gentle and understanding. She’s tired of patching Naomi back up. She thought they had finally gotten to the point where Naomi could own their relationship, and she can’t stand to see it backslide like this. “TWICE? You’re gonna do this to me twice. Naomi, no! You fucking….stop right now! Don’t you dare leave me in your bed again. I know you, Naomi. I know you’re lonely. I think you need someone to want you. Well, I do want you. So be brave — and want me back.” Naomi doesn’t have any cover to hide under this time. There’s no excuse that it was “just the MDMA” or that it’s just an experiment, or that she’s just hanging out with a friend and totally not gay. She’s running away from a reality now, the reality that actually, Emily does like her back, and she could have this relationship if she wanted. And up until now, Emily has been so steadfast and brave, willing to go as slowly as necessary to protect Naomi’s feelings, because she knew that eventually, she and Naomi would get their chance. But she can’t be strong like that anymore. This is finally too much rejection for Emily. She throws herself out in the open, saying everything she’s been wanting to say but holding back on account of Naomi’s feelings. “I do want you. So be brave and want me back.”

Naomi goes home without saying anything to Emily. She quietly cries in the shower. She gets dressed in a yellow plaid shirt that mirrors the blue and yellow plaid shirt that Emily wore earlier in the episode. She finds that Kieran is now in bed with her mum. He’s finally assumed the fatherly role she always wanted him to be, but not quite the way she wanted. I like this in general. I think it makes sense that Kieran does eventually become the father figure she wanted him to be. But I think it’s a bit too soon to introduce Kieran this way, seeing as less than twenty four hours ago he tried to kiss her, and I can’t imagine Naomi’s mum would just be okay with that. Naomi goes to school and contemplates calling Emily, but can’t bring herself to do it. Doug and Harriet arrive to count the votes, so Naomi dives underneath the desk to hide. Harriet decides that Cook “will not win” and stuffs the extra votes for him in her bra.

More than anything, Naomi hates injustice, and so when Harriet announces her as the winner, she says, “You should have more confidence. I mean, your tits are fine. Probably a bit flat, but no need to stuff your bra.” She then proceeds to pull the votes out of Harriet’s bra, and says, “Cook won. He’s our president.” Cook then declares a riot, and Naomi rings the fire alarm. Naomi sees Emily across the room, but she’s not ready to deal with that. Not yet. Kieran chases Naomi down in an attempt to apologize, and they eventually reach an agreement that Kieran should keep seeing Naomi’s mum, which… again, I’m all for this, but two days ago they hadn’t even met, and then when they did meet, it was because Kieran was coming to apologize to Naomi for kissing her. At what point did they get to know each other well enough that Kieran knows he likes Naomi’s mum, and why weren’t either of them worried about the whereabouts of Naomi? But in this moment, Naomi puts her resentment for her mum aside, puts her mum’s happiness first, and tells Kieran to go tell her mum how much he likes her.

Anyway, Naomi goes to leave when she sees Cook alone in a room. He says that he only entered the race to piss Naomi off, and this is a lie. He entered to impress Naomi, to see if he had a chance with her. But he rewrites the story, just a little bit, because he thinks he knows what we as the audience know- Naomi is gay, and she only has eyes for Emily. Naomi asks if Cook ever wishes things were simple, and he says, “Things are simple. I won. Now we get to willy waggle, yeah?” and this, too, is a lie. Things for Cook aren’t simple, and they never really have been. But if he can pretend they are, if he can rewrite his story as he sees fit, it’s easier to deal with. Naomi starts protesting that she never agreed to the deal, to which Cook responds, “Are you sure? Are you actually sure you never said because… Hang on. I think we should willy waggle.” Naomi starts to kiss him, in an attempt to be “normal”, in an attempt to “screw guys to make [her feelings for Emily] go away”. Cook says, “they all come to the Cookie Monster in the end.” In this moment, I think he feels that, against all odds, he’s won. Everything else might not be simple, but maybe this is, after all. He won, so he gets the prize. But Naomi stops- “Cook! This isn’t right…it just isn’t a goer.” Cook’s suspicions are confirmed now- Naomi isn’t interested in him, and she’s not going to be, because she’s in love with Emily. He says, You fancy me, I’m cool with it. So there’s obviously another reason why you won’t fuck me. And it’s probably a good one, because you’re, you know, clever.”

Finally, Naomi goes back home. Her mum enters the kitchen and tells Naomi that she kicked everyone out, and finally, Gina is being a good parent. She’s putting Naomi first. Then she sits down to tell Naomi the story of her pregnancy. She says, “your dad turned out to be a shitty little prick, and it was all a little bit rubbish. Until you made my life complete. And actually, rather fucking wonderful.” Naomi responds with a small, “I did that?” She’s finally getting the comfort that she wanted, this time from the person who was supposed to provide it all along. Gina continues, “I wasn’t expecting it. People who make us happy are never the people you expect. So, when you found someone, you’ve got to cherish it.” So Naomi realizes that she can make other people’s lives better just by being in them, and she goes to find the person that makes her happy, the person she didn’t expect, so that she can finally cherish her.

And this final scene is one of the most beautiful Skins has ever done. Naomi goes to Emily’s house, but Emily refuses to open the door because she’s been crying. Emily is totally honest in tis moment. She’s done lying for Naomi’s feelings. Naomi sits down next to the door, and finally admits how she feels. “I do want someone. Need someone. You were right.” “And?” Emily gently pushes, always so careful with Naomi, even when she doesn’t want to be. “and when I’m with you, I feel like I’m a better person. I feel happier. Less…alone. Less lonely.” Emily reaches her hand through the cat flap to hold Naomi’s, and Naomi, finally ready to say what she has to say, finally ready to be brave and love Emily back, continues, “But it’s not as simple as that, is it? Being with someone… mean, I don’t know. I mean, I don’t think so. I mean… Can’t we just sit like this… for a bit?” And Emily says, “yeah, we can. For a bit.” Emily still believes in Naomi, Naomi’s ability to overcome her fear and come to terms with her feelings. But she’s okay with waiting just a little bit longer, because she also believes that Naomi is still making baby steps, and that when Naomi is ready, she’ll be able to be with her.

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