#to be loved in a way so raw that to deem it romantic is to dumb it down

[tetsuskei]

lust for life - zhongli [nsfw]

synopsis: your first time with the geo archon leads to a riveting adventure that you never dreamed of, but also don’t regret

notes: this is the first time i’m writing for zhongli and genshin, so please be nice. i apologize for anything potentially ooc. i’m learning. :]

warnings: praise kink, dragon tendencies (?), unprotected sex, pet names, zhongli is called morax, lana del rey song title, body worship, liyue archon quest spoilers

word count: 2.4k

interactions and comments appreciated!

being in a relationship with zhongli is exhilarating. it is calm and a rush all at the same time. invigorating, perhaps.

liyue, the city of contracts, is always bustling with something new and exciting each day. the harbor specifically hails as a place that showcases the customs and traditions in the most beautiful ways.

the smell of freshly made grilled tiger-fish and chopped suey perfuming the air, and the shine of the beautifully crafted kites the nice old lady sells only make up a few traits the harbor carries. there’s also the bustle of the shops, selling different types of flowers and fruits and jewels ranging from jade to lapis.

as much as liyue is your home, there couldn’t be a better place of solace than in your boyfriend.

over the course of knowing him, he’s taught and shown you many things. and one of those things just happens to be the way of love. you have never been that involved before in a romantic relationship before he came along. but once he did, you could barely remember what life was like before him.

being that zhongli is now ‘mortal’, there are many things about him that still stand out from regular human beings. of course, this all makes sense when considering his reptilian nature at hand.

his eyes, a piercing aurelian color are a stark contrast to any other pair you’ve seen. they closely resemble two pieces of raw cor lapis.

the man is large—not necessarily very muscular, but lean and slender in all the right ways. he’s also a lot taller than the average person, having you crane your head up at times just to hold decent eye contact with him.

you often were bashful and easily embarrassed in front of zhongli, but he only ever has been very understanding and patient. a wise and well respected man with an eclectic taste for history and knowledge. there’s nothing about him that isn’t amazing.

“is this okay?”

zhongli’s voice breaks you from your thoughts. the gravel of it warms your tummy and sends shivers down your spine. his eyes seem to be looking through you in tantalizing yet understanding way.

“you seem conflicted over something. what’s troubling your mind, darling?” he inquires, tilting his head to the side. his obsidian locks, ends dipped in pure bronze, cascade down his back beautifully and you wonder if there’s ever anything this man does that could be deemed unattractive.

he asks these questions all while kneeling in front of your leaking cunt. like your nude body isn’t completely visible and vulnerable before him. but murmurs of your beauty and rarity cause you to relax and confess your thoughts.

“i just—“ you pause, apprehensive, “i’ve never done this before.”

there’s a look that flashes in his eyes, but only for a brief moment before changing to contemplation. “ah, i see.”

heart racing, you think that he’s about to pull out of the moment you two share. that he’d judge you for your lack of experience.

the feeling of a gloved hand on your cheek makes your heart skip a beat. “there’s nothing to be worried about. i will make extra sure to go at your pace. as long as you still trust me to lead, of course. i will make sure you’re comfortable, dearest.”

zhongli kisses the inside of your thigh, peering at you with subtle glee. to tell the truth, his mind can’t help but think of all the ways he’d tease and break you. but you don’t need to know that—at least not yet. when the time comes he’d explore that. for as long as he’s lived, waiting is something that doesn’t concern him. your wellbeing will always come first.

“okay…” you breathe, spreading your legs more for him at his request.

“always so precious and good for me, are you?” he hums with delight. your face blooms with heat but you nod meekly.

he continues, “you’ll tell me what you like, yes? while i eat this cunt out?”

your boyfriend’s blunt words strike your heart (and core) all at once.

zhongli squeezes your thighs in warning, “i need a verbal response, or i will stop.”

“yes, li.” you murmur, sending him a nervous grin.

“thank you, my love.” he smiles before moving over you. a ghostly sigh leaves you as his hands caress you hips, holding you in place with little effort.

his tongue, unusually long, sneaks out and swipes at your core. there’s a hum of satisfaction once your essence hits his buds. after tediously circling the outside of your leaking hole, it plunges forth within you.

even with it being the first time, you’re sure the wet muscle reaches places that no one besides him ever will, and you gasp, hands moving to grasp anything to ground yourself.

“z-zhongli—!” you stutter, words and lungs failing you all at once.

zhongli entwines your hands, squeezing gently to calm you. his free hand, however, only moves over your clit to rile you up further.

he hums again, satisfied with what you gift him when more of your juices evade his tongue.

“it’s been a long time since i’ve tasted something this sweet.” his lithe fingers continuing their motions as he attentively watches your reactions. “i think my tongue will always remember the way you taste.”

your hips have somehow found a way to ride his tongue and he assists by nearly having you fuck yourself on his face.

“i-i-!” you’re unable to warn zhongli of anything as you feel yourself succumbing to a realm of euphoric pleasure, seizing in place. your eyes roll back, and you find yourself facing a blinding light. you wonder if you’ve just died right now and then.

but as soothing hands caress your being and plant kisses on your cheeks, you realize you’re very much still on teyvat.

“ahh, so that’s what you look like cumming.” the archon’s eyes gleam and a hungry look flashes in them. “who knew how beautifully ravishing you’d look.”

not a moment passes before his fingers are on you again, and he slides in two digits.

“i’m sensitive, li! please!” you whine, hands grabbing his wrist.

“you’re doing so well though,” zhongli praises, his tone sweet like nectar. his normally stoic expression to no surprise, is nonexistent with you. the only visible look is love and adoration. “you can cum again, hmm? don’t you think you deserve it?”

tears slip down your face as you nod frantically, “yes!”

his eyes brighten at the way you squirm and try to conceal your whimpers. it’s only then does he realize he must toy with you even further.

the fingers that stilled themselves move again. the sound of lewd squelching filling the room. zhongli doesn’t know how much longer he can hold off before fucking you. the smell of your arousal is overwhelming, to say the least. and dark thoughts of wanting to breed you start to consume his mind.

regardless, you still needed to be prepared to take him. it would be no good if you were uncomfortable.

he works to bring you thus forth to another orgasm, his hand skilled and dexterous as it seeks to pleasure you.

“feels so good li! r-right there!” you gasp, arching up to follow his movements.

a hand soothes your hair and you feel his lips kiss your forehead. “relax dearest, you’re tightening up. just let go.”

it isn’t long before you’re cumming again. losing strength, you collapse fully on your back. you hear your boyfriend chuckle as he sucks the gloves of his fingers clean from your essence.

after giving you time to recover, zhongli gently runs his hands over you.

“darling, why don’t you help me undress. hmm?” he coaxes, moving back to begin to peel off his robes.

you sit up, wobbling as you kneel in front of him and he drags your hand up to his collar.

zhongli leans down, kissing you on the lips. he tastes of whatever tea he’s recently had. and of, well, you.

soon, your boyfriend is undressed, and archons (albeit, him himself) could only tell how it is possible for someone to be so beautiful and handsome, his figure lean and muscular in all the right ways.

it makes you feel weak in the knees how easy it is for zhongli to command attention and control. the way you’re pliant to his will because of how strong he is, allowing for him to hold your jaw in place as his tongue explores your mouth.

the feeling of something heavy and hard against your stomach makes your heart drop. there is no mistaking what it is.

as if sensing your distress, he pulls back from you. “what’s wrong, dear?” he grabs himself, stroking leisurely as he eyes you with quiet mischief.

you swallow, eyes having trouble leveling with his, “w-will it fit?”

you’re cute. too cute, for him. “of course darling,” he taps the head on your drenched clit, the tip catching easily onto your entrance.

“you were made to take me, after all.”

there isn’t anything else said once he sheathes himself fully inside of you.

shared moans fill the room as you both stare at each other for a moment. zhongli is hot and throbbing inside of you, and that alone has you cumming again.

“goodness,” he huffs, composing himself, “you are more sensitive than i thought.”

“ahh-sorry!”

“no need to apologize. it’s perfect. you’re perfect.” zhongli murmurs, kissing the corner of your mouth.

“i’m going to move now, love.” he warns, voice soft.

you nod solemnly, squeezing his hand as a sign of goodwill.

it’s all odd at first, with how full you are, but eventually the discomfort becomes more pleasure than anything else. the way his cock is stroking your walls, hitting every crevice with a kiss, soon has you keening.

grunts fill your ear as zhongli’s pace slowly picks up over time. you think you might be somewhere in the clouds above mt. tianheng.

your boyfriend’s frame cocoons your own. he fucks you like he’s yearned you for eternity. as if he’s been preparing for this moment. his hips move like flowing water, skilled all around.

zhongli’s sharp canines bite into your shoulder, a low growl leaving him as he marks you. he doesn’t mean to blemish your beautiful skin, but the primal part in him can’t help himself.

your moans are like a melody to him, and he thinks he may drown in them and the way that they sound. he starts to think that maybe you yourself are some deity or maybe a siren with the way you have him under your spell.

“li, please, go faster!” you beg, looking up at him with wet eyes, “i-i can take it, i promise!”

“are you sure that’s what you want? i won’t be able to fully hold back if you ask that of me.” he warns.

“yes, please!” you whine, “please, morax!”

before you know it, he’s kissing you again, the sweet taste of him elevating your focus away from the now ruthless snap of his hips.

he gifts you his fingers in your mouth once his lips move over your collarbones and breasts, tongue wrapping around the sensitive nub while his free hand twists the other.

“you must be a gift from celestial to feel this good.” zhongli moans. he’s holding you in his lap now, moving you up and down his shaft just how he likes.

“have you got one more for me, love?” he pants, “then i’ll take care of you and let you rest.”

you find yourself crying out for morax repeatedly, and it sendings an unknown exhilarating feeling down zhongli’s spine. maybe because it’s the thought that no other god could save you but him.

“m’cumming!” you cry, once again clamping down on the man with a vice like grip.

zhongli shudders, trying to keep his focus on you coming undone, “i don’t think i can hold back much longer myself. where—“

“inside. please cum inside me!” you wail, twisting your legs to lock around him.

“fuck,” he curses, not meaning the slip of his tongue. but that’s just what you do to him. “a-are you certain? do not say things based on what you think i wish—“

zhongli does not expect for you to pout up at him with big, wet eyes and say, “you don’t want to cum in me?”

frozen, he blinks slowly at you. then, there’s the sound of a dark chuckle, almost inhumane. “you don’t know, do you?”

“how i’ll give you anything you want? you can ask for the stars and they’re yours.” he groans, hips erratic again. he’s smothering you with his mouth again, moving everywhere to kiss every inch of you. your legs are folded up and placed over his shoulders, pressed tightly against yourself.

he swears, “i’ll cherish and love you till death. contract or not, i vow to never break that word.” even in the afterlife.”

“that being said, i’ll cum in you as many times as you want.”

you cum at his words, sobbing from the tsunami emotions and feelings that’s hit you.

it isn’t long before zhongli follows, an exceeding large warmth and throbbing as he spills himself into you.

he holds onto you tightly, refusing to move until he’s sure that his cum has settled within you.

slowly pulling out and putting your legs back down, he examines you fully. “are you alright?

the smile you give is hazy. “golden.”

“don’t leave.”

he frowns, tongue clicking, “darling, you must let me clean you up at least. i can’t bear to leave you—“

“just for a moment!” you pout, burying your face into his damp chest. “i promise.”

“a moment.” he repeats, chuckling. soothing your hair.

in all honesty, a part of you liked having him leak down your legs, and maybe he enjoyed it to. for him, in all the years of his life he’s never felt a love like this before. he just did his best to show appreciation.

if this is how he’d sing words into your ears, how his affection would wrap around, you would very well get used to this. to a routine.

but then again, a zhongli without surprises doesn’t seem fitting for you at all.

after all, ‘normal’ isn’t even as common as we think it is.

tagging my beloved @hwaitham. thank you for always supporting me and for being so loving and welcoming. <3

[cobaltperun]

Genius (4) - Bittersuite

Cairo Sweet x female (G!P) Reader

Summary: It was such a cliché, a reunion she didn’t expect to ever happen, let alone six years after she last saw you. It was supposed to mean nothing, a bit of nostalgia, maybe a brief catching up while waiting for class, it was supposed to be a small wave of nostalgia, not a tsunami that disrupted her entire life. You were her opposite, and as hard as she tried she couldn’t resist your pull.

Story masterlist / First part / Previous Part / Next Part

Word count: 3.5k

-God, I hope it all goes away, 'cause I can't fall in love with you-

A madman’s love.

Cairo had no idea how that felt, but the way Miller described it sounded exactly like what she was yearning for. Ever since she was old enough to yearn for love. To be loved by someone to the point of madness, for that someone to merely be a bone monolith beneath her, to be loved so fiercely and strongly that both her and the one loving her end up consumed by the flames of emotions within them.

To be madly loved and to madly love in return.

How did that feel? To fight for someone’s love, no matter the circumstances, the taboo, the judgment of society. To feel so right no matter how many people said it’s wrong.

She didn’t know, but she imagined Miller knew, he described it, after all. He wrote it with passion that struck her, that made her yearn for what he was painting in her mind. What about his age? Well, she did desire something that others would deem wrong, didn’t she? And then there was Winnie, and Cairo would have cursed her for filling her head with the ideas of giving her virginity to someone older if Winnie didn’t present such a convincing argument. To give her virginity to someone that was, as Winnie put it, wagyu beef, and not deli meat.

She didn’t know she wasn’t supposed to bleed the first time she has sex, the books she read made sex out to be raw, rough, immediate, a desperate act of chasing pleasure, they hardly ventured into the ideas of woman’s arousal, much less aftercare.

Could he give it to her? Could he see her for who she really was? Reveal sides of her she didn’t even know existed yet? He certainly found something worth it in this damn village she despised, he could do the same with her. Find worth no one else did, make her feel wanted by someone. Make her feel like she was the only one who mattered.

Her phone buzzed and she glanced at it. You sent her a message, but she didn’t reach for her phone to reply. She just leaned her head back instead. She couldn’t deny the visceral reaction she had whenever she was reminded of you. Of her heart beating faster, or the dreams she had, or the fact that she wasn’t entirely sure what she was looking forward to more on Monday mornings, listening to Miller, or sitting next to you, your arms occasionally touching and making her feel like she was on fire.

How did you see her? Did you still see the girl who read to you, the girl that dragged you around the forest around her house, the girl who pushed you away? Or did you see her for who she was right now? A ghost, someone a rare few paid attention to, though she kept hearing she was extraordinary. A lonely girl longing for attention and escape. You were certainly providing her with the escape she needed, seeing as Saturdays became your usual getaways, and you took her to places she had no idea about, she was living when she was with you, free from the shackles of nowhere Tennessee.

But your love for her was a lot like Winnie’s. Immature, normal, fueled by reasons appropriate for your age. She couldn’t imagine you or Winnie being driven to madness by your love for her, if the way you loved her even included anything romantic in the first place.

She needed a love that wasn’t ordinary. She needed her madman’s love.

And she feared that whatever was happening between the two of you wasn’t a product of love or friendship, but a desperate attempt to emulate what was once lost.

Cairo didn’t want that. She didn’t want to emulate the past, she wanted… What did she want? She knew what she didn’t want, but what did she actually want?

~X~

This wasn’t working, and the only reason you still tolerated this class was because Cairo was there as well. You suppressed a sigh as Miller droned on about the writer’s style being bold, and too much, and it really was.

You were trying to reignite your love for reading but all this was doing was making you wish to never open a book again in your entire life. You couldn’t get the fact that he went thought student’s stuff out of your head, and that impression alone ruined the class for you.

“Meet me after classes,” he leaned over Cairo’s shoulder, too close to her, secretive, whispering so no one else but Cairo could hear him. Though not quiet enough for you not to hear him, even if you looked like you weren’t paying attention. The fuck was with this guy? After classes?

You were reading too much into it, right?

~X~

Was he seeing her? Like Winnie said? Cairo wasn’t sure yet, but she couldn’t deny their similarities, how at ease she felt, how the only time she felt this much at ease was when she was with you on your rides outside the village. It compared to that as far as her ease went, but it went further, it met other needs she had as well. The ones she hated to admit she had. Her need for approval and attention from someone older, something she never got before, being a big part of it, and what made this seem more impactful to her than what she had with you.

And then there was a part of her that consciously made what she had with you feel like it was to be expected. Like it was a given that you’d reconnect. And she needed to look at it that way, otherwise she’d spiral into fear and panic, because if it wasn’t a given, and if both of you chose to actively put effort into rebuilding what you once had, then that in and of itself, would be a form of madness she wasn’t ready to face just yet.

“See you on Monday, Mr. Miller,” Winnie said as she opened the doors so she could drag Cairo to get her beloved food.

“Bye, kid,” a kid, that’s how he saw Winnie, but he didn’t call Cairo a ‘kid’, so at the very least he didn’t see her as one, though her and Winnie were the same age. He saw her as an adult, and she very much liked that. “Oh, and Cairo, are you going to come this Saturday?” he asked her.

She realized she never got to answer him, and it wasn’t just because Winnie came in, there was an issue of already making plans with you. “I already made plans with Y/N, but I’ll see if she’s fine with postponing,” she told him, not quite ready to give a definitive answer.

He seemed a bit startled all of a sudden. “Y/N?”

Cairo nodded, not sure what made him react the way he did just now, though it was subtle she could see he was a bit uncomfortable.

“Did- Uh, did she mention me in any way?” he tried to brush it off as a normal question, but the way he avoided her eyes gave him away.

“No,” she replied. Not even sure why you would mention him. You didn’t particularly enjoy his class, she could tell by the way you actively tried not to listen to him, and she knew you were doing bare minimum on the assignments. You didn’t like either him or the class, and Caro didn’t know why, she didn’t ask why, and you never told her why.

“Oh, okay, forget I said anything,” Miller regained some color when she denied you ever mentioning him and she just nodded, choosing not to ask him about it.

She’d just ask you. After all, you were the one who kept something from her.

~X~

You were in your garage, just cleaning your motorcycle and your gear when you heard the doorbell ringing. You weren’t expecting any visitors, so maybe it was just one of your neighbors. When the doorbell rang the second time you got up, leaving the rug you were using on the bucket, and quickly washed your hands in the sink, before going outside.

“Sorry for the wait, I was-“ you paused, seeing Cairo on your doorstep. “Hey, I didn’t expect to see you here,” you climbed up the stairs as Cairo looked to the side. You couldn’t read her, but you could tell something wasn’t right.

“Hey, Y/N,” she greeted you.

“Come in,” you opened the doors for her and stepped aside, she knew the house. Even if she hasn’t been inside in a long time. You followed after Cairo, taking notice of how she stopped and stared at the copy of Jules Verne’s ‘Around the World in Eighty Days’. You were trying to read it, but between Miller killing your desire to read and the book being closely tied to your and Cairo’s friendship while you were kids, you hated to admit it, but you weren’t having an easy time with it. Still, you were about two thirds in, so at least you were making some progress.

“Do you want something to drink? Or eat? I was about to make something for lunch anyway,” you were already heading toward the kitchen as Cairo sat down on the armchair.

“No, I just ate with Winnie, I’m okay,” she said and you chose not to push her. She was tense, and it didn’t escape your notice that she chose one seat that would put the most distance between the two of you regardless of where you sat down.

So, you mirrored her, taking a seat on the far end of the sofa, letting the distance between you engulf you. The silence felt deafening, and you hoped it wouldn’t come to this. This was the tension you were worried about the first time you took her out of the village, it wasn’t supposed to be happening now, two weeks after you reunited. “What’s wrong?” you asked carefully.

“Mr. Miller said something, well, he asked me if you mentioned him. Why?” she asked, looking you in the eyes and clutching the straps of her bag in her hand.

You could swear you were hearing alarm bells ringing in your head. Why would he ask her that? “I caught him and coach what’s-his-name going through your books on the first day, that’s all,” you had no reason to protect him, since Cairo asked so openly. Frankly, you weren’t sure why you haven’t told her that in the first place.

“That’s it?” she asked incredulously.

“You wanted more?” you were astonished. Now, you didn’t expect her to be furious, or go on a rant, or anything like that, but you didn’t expect her to think nothing of it. What did she even want from you, because you honestly couldn’t tell where you were standing with her.

“You’re being ridiculous,” she defended him. “Mr. Miller isn’t being inappropriate, he sees me,” she told you.

You raised an eyebrow, puzzled. Sees her? “Cairo, what do you mean he sees you?” you questioned, leaning a bit closer over the dreadfully large distance between the two of you.

Cairo looked away, contemplating whether she should tell you something and then, finally, she made her decision. “He sees my talent; he sees what others’ don’t. He- he gave me special treatment, offered me an early mid-term assignment,” she leaned back, likely reading your frown as if you were disapproving of her.

It wasn’t her. It was his actions. It didn’t feel right. It felt unprofessional, it felt like he was actively crossing boundaries with her, taking advantage of her need to be seen, as she put it. “Cairo, he might not be good for you,” you didn’t feel like you had the right to influence her, or get involved in her decisions, but you also felt like you had to, much like all those years ago, pull her away from something that could harm her.

“You just came back, don’t pretend you understand what is best for me,” she snapped, her voice shaking a bit and even from this distance you could see the tears pooling in her eyes. “I’m going to a poetry reading this Saturday, to see him, just so you know,” the fact that she was canceling your plans didn’t matter nearly as much as the reason why she chose to cancel them.

What pushed her this far? To seek approval from him of all people? “Okay,” but she was too emotional to talk to properly right now. So, you chose to back away for now, to just hope that nothing even worse would happen. And Cairo? She just left, closing the doors with a sound that rang through your mind as if it signaled the start of madness.

~X~

He truly did see her, he saw all of her. The ghost, the rose bush that wasn’t allowed to blossom, no matter how hard she tried. And she saw herself in him, she saw her reflection, and she wondered if he saw himself in her as well. She was willing to bet he did, they were both ghosts, cursed to never be seen for what they were by anyone who wasn’t like them.

He didn’t take her somewhere else, he showed her a side of her home she wasn’t aware of, and she managed to see worth in it she never knew existed. She yearned for more. She yearned for an even deeper connection. She yearned… she longed… she…

This wasn’t a given. This was something she had to reach for, something she had to work for, something forbidden, and yet so appealing at the same time.

Would he fight for her? Accept her entirely and burn in their shared passion and desires and yearning, or would he refuse to participate in this dance? She feared the answer, because, if he wouldn’t… who would?

And in the middle of it all, of all those thoughts and feelings, she just for a moment, saw your face as you told her he wasn’t good for her. Your eyes, intensely looking right at her. What did you see? What compelled you to look at her like that? And along the image of you, leaning closer to her, so close that she, despite the almost overwhelming distance, caught herself unsure if she should back away, maintain the distance, or lean in, encouraging you to keep closing the distance until there was none of it left. Along that image she vividly saw the wild rose bush crushed by an old fallen tree and her eyes widened as she remembered you pulling her away from it all.

Would you pull her back once again? Would Miller be the old tree to crush her? Or would he stand strong next to her as she blossomed? She didn’t decide yet, but she knew the way he was looking at her right now lacked the intensity your stare had.

~X~

You’ve been denying it for years, but Cairo, even after she pushed you away remained a constant presence in your life. You still remembered that time in the forest around her house, when she dragged you around and then just froze when she saw an old tree that had fallen over a bush of wild roses. It wasn’t the scene that remained in your memory. You weren’t old enough for it to profoundly affect you. Even now you didn’t come to give any deeper meaning to the imagery you witnessed.

It was still an impactful memory because she sobbed, and she wasn’t even aware of it. She let out a sound, filled with so much sorrow you couldn’t even comprehend what was going through her head back then. To this day, you didn’t know why it affected her so much, but you knew how it affected you. How it made you feel like you had to take her away from there, that you had to do something so she would smile again.

She set a bar so damn high for you that it wasn’t just the fact that you were moving a lot that stopped you from being best friends with someone. It was the fact that they just couldn’t compare to her. And then you got a bit older and started understanding your sexuality and you tried, you really did. You dated on and off, but again, the connection you were seeking wasn’t there. No matter how amazing the girl was you just found it hard to let someone in the way you did with Cairo. Did you ever have any feelings for Cairo that weren’t purely friendship related? No, not even a childish crush, but the connection between you was just strong enough to affect you years after you last saw her. You felt that connection in the songs you learnt to play, in some of the music you created, brimming with longing and inspired by a friendship long ago left in the past that refused to fade away.

You glanced at her, at her focused gaze meant only for Miller in this very moment, and you weren’t sure how to feel. You just waited for the class to end. And then he approached your and Cairo’s table from behind, and you saw his left hand reaching for her hand as he leaned over her shoulder.

As if he absolutely had to say something only to her.

Your eyebrow twitched. How dare he? He was her teacher, and she was only eighteen. Without thinking you pushed the table to your left so abruptly he lost his hold on the edge of the table and stumbled forward, and, unable to stay on his feet he dropped to his knees to the gasps of the students.

“I’m fine, I’m fine, don’t worry,” he got up, dusting his pants and raising his hands as he turned away from the class, embarrassed by what just happened. Just for a moment his eyes met yours and you glared, begging for him to read your mind and see what you thought. ‘Learn where the damn boundary is,’ is what you were trying to convey through your eyes. Consequences be damned.

Not like there would be any. If he went and reported you, you’d just say what you suspected, consequences of those actions be damned. He, at the very least, did show favoritism toward Cairo.

When the class ended you stormed out of the classroom, ignoring Cairo and Winnie’s eyes following you.

~X~

As you walked out of the classroom after all your classes ended you suddenly felt a hand grab your forearm and pull you aside much to your utter surprise.

“Come with me,” Cairo demanded, ordering you as if you had no choice but to follow her every whim.

“You could be a bit gentler,” you complained, not appreciating how tightly she was gripping your arm.

Cairo looked back at you, anger flashing in her eyes. “I could say the same to you, why would you make him fall like that?” she hissed, dragging you to a slightly secluded corner.

“Maybe next time he’ll think twice before putting his hands where they shouldn’t be,” you were instantly annoyed by the reminder of where he was about to put his hands. And Cairo jumping to his defense wasn’t helping.

“Yeah, and where is that?” she challenged you as you leaned against the wall and she stepped right in front of you. If you moved even a bit, you’d be pressed right against her.

“Not on you, that’s for sure. Or any of his students,” he had his responsibilities and one of those was to keep the proper boundaries with his students.

“And if I want him to?” Cairo demanded and you just… weren’t sure how to answer that. You knew how it made you feel though. And suddenly it wasn’t just about his advances toward Cairo being inappropriate in your eyes. You finally felt as if the pieces on your side were falling into place, and you were no longer seeing the girl you spent your childhood with. You saw an eighteen-year-old girl and somehow you were no longer certain you only saw her as a friend. It was as if the very thought of him touching her ignited flames of madness within you, a jealousy you didn’t even know you could feel over Cairo.

“Do you really?”

“I haven’t decided yet.”

You took her words in, you forced yourself to calm down, to take it easy, to think rationally. “Why did you push me away when we were kids Cairo?” you asked and she backed away a bit, and though she didn’t leave, you could see it in her eyes. She wasn’t going to answer. And her answer mattered to you more than anything, because her answer was the only thing that could make any of this worth it. That was the only thing that could validate or invalidate your feelings. That was the only thing that could solve every question running through your mind. And she wasn’t giving it to you.

A/N: Is Cairo confused at the moment? Yup! Is R? Absolutely! So, tell me what you think, I would appreciate it!

Taglist: @deimaisgail @bee-keeping @marvelous-disaster @jmwetterlund @tekanparadiae

@alexkolax @ioveyouyouloveme @aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh

[citruslullabies]

I apologize in advance if it's not the greatest

Trigger warnings: death, Catnap's death, delusion (catnap worshiping the prototype)

Romantic/platonic?: neither

Requested by: no one!

Category: angsty songfic (Whisky Lullabies by Janet Devlin)

Ship (romantic or platonic): none? Catnap and small mention of you

Word count: 1127

Whisky Lullabies

The factory was dim and quiet, the sound of old running water slowly dripping being the only thing that rang within the walls. Echoing endlessly and driving the creatures inside to ever longing madness and loneliness with newfound death inside and lost memories.

…

When I was a child, they'd ask me where it hurt

And wipe the tears from my eyes

Sure embraces, gentle forehead kisses

Making sure that I was alright

A sniffle and cry escaped a small child's throat, holding his leg as blood slowly trickled down his knee. The air making it sting like it was swallowing raw peppermint, the young boy looked up when workers approached. Soothing him and telling him it would be alright, nursing his wound as if it was the end of the world. A woman kneeled beside little Theodore, wiping away the tears from his glossy eyes and kissing his temple to ease his mind before carefully bringing him to play with the other children.

He watched as children came and went, being adopted while he was always left behind. But the employees always assured him that he'd be adopted, one way or another.

As I grew older and the nights grew shorter

I no longer cared where it hurt

All I hear is Whisky Lullabies, there to cradle me to sleep

As Theodore grew older, he was deemed unfit for adoption and perfect for experimentation. Once kind faces turned evil like the villains in his stories, cutting him open and not explaining to him what was going on. Kisses turned into scalpels and embraces turned into him being held down, not understanding what happened and why they were being so cruel.

The reality of his situation sunk in after so long, and he began to resent the employees and the other children. No longer crying when cut open or forced down, no longer caring about what was happening to him. But he found comfort in another after so long.

Scars they heal in time

The raw wounds on my mind they aren't as easily fixed

You can't mend what isn't broken

Kind words are rarely spoken

In time I will learn this

With blood fresh on his paws, he looked to the prototype to be his new caretaker with the mentality of a young child desperate for a loving parent. He became obsessed with any bit of praise he could possibly receive, even if it was silent.

At first the silence hurt but he quickly grew to understand that he couldn't expect words of affection, not wanting to beg for more and drive his savior away. He didn't want to be selfish for his mender to give more than he already has.

But I grow older

And the nights grow shorter

Drowning as a sink or swim

All I hear is Whisky Lullabies, there to cradle me to sleep

Mindlessly and tiredly stretching along the building, growing thinner day by day. His ribs sighed with every breath he took and his paws ached with every step he took, hunger consuming him. But he kept pushing through it all. As the day came to an end, or even if it was just exhaustion that took over him, with shaky knees he fell like a wounded horse as his ears flopped over and his hunger and pain was his only company as he fell to sleep, red gas seeping from him and flooding the room as if to keep him asleep.

Sticks and stones they break me to the bone

But words they cut

They will always hurt me

When you had arrived, he was immediately pushed to take care of you. To get rid of the problem at hand which was you, and he had recognized you. He remembered you putting bandaids on his knees and carefully cupping his face, and he remembered you taking his wrist to guide him to experimentation. He truly loved you as if he was your own, and was as loyal as a hound to you. But you knew what was happening to him and did nothing before you quit.

What hurt more is when you didn't recognize him, and instead hurt him. He shook off the pain and looked up to see the loving hand in which he grew to adore.

Please be my saving grace

As the hand slowly came down, Catnap quickly shuffled to his knees and held his arms wide open. As if silently begging for forgiveness for failing, like a child would silently apologize with a hug with their mother. The prototype was everything to him, a savior, a protector, a mother. It was everything to him.

Please be my saving grace.

He found comfort in a creature so mysterious, loving it unconditionally that he just held still. Waiting for the prototype to do whatever it saw fit, whether that be forgiveness or punishment. He hoped and prayed that the prototype would be graceful like many times before and spare him the pain, not wanting to be hurt by someone who he trusted again.

How to answer all my prayers

The feline didn't even blink, weakly on his knees that shook and stumbled from being barely exposed bone only protected by thin skin with slight fur on it. He spread his arms further and brought his chest in to show obedience and vulnerability to his caretaker, as if saying he was the prototype’s little boy. Even if he was an adult by now, he wanted that childhood he was robbed of. And the prototype had served as his mother, or atleast the only parent he ever knew. He watched with wide expecting eyes as the sharp fingers turned into the shape of a bullet's head, curious what this meant. Desperate for an answer but too scared to ask in fear of consequence.

With a choked silent sob, he felt the hand suddenly thrust into his mouth and impale him. His arms weakly fell to the side, as tears slowly flooded his eyes. Once again, he had been betrayed by someone who he thought he could trust.

Please be my saving grace.

You watched as his body was limply dragged up into the unknown, with Catnap still alive but having given up for his last few moments of life. What had he done wrong? Did he deserve this? He did everything he could to be good. The pain was awful, it felt just like needles scientists would carelessly stab into his skin but this time he had held himself down. He slowly shut his eyes, pitifully accepting his fate.

He had been nothing but good but in the end he was still just someone or something’s toy.

All I hear is, Whisky Lullabies...

There to cradle me to sleep

I swear I'm getting stuff in my inbox done

[sevikasleftpussyflap]

arcane character and how they cook?? i feel like theyre either amazing chefs or burn water on the stove😭

Hello! I usually only do Sevika but I tried my hand at the other characters I simp for so if it sucks no it doesn’t <3

Sevika

Wouldn’t know much beyond warming things up. If it’s meat, then it’ll definitely be a bit tough and leathery. This is not a problem for her and she’ll take a bite and moan into it like she just made a five star meal. Next time, cook the meal yourself and give her a task she can’t mess up like chopping vegetables

Speaking of chopping vegetables, she’s no longer allowed to use her blade. She sawed halfway through the countertop early on into its installation

And speaking of her prosthetic, she tries to show off by skewering ingredients with her claws

Burns herself and doesn’t even blink. Has been grabbing the pan of food off of a hot surface with just her hands until you caught her doing that and yelled at her. Her metal arm is scarred to hell. She probably just didn’t feel like buying mittens and wouldn’t use them enough to justify the purchase

Even when you get mittens for her, she’s not wearing them. She’d fold them in half and use them that way, if anything

Housewife kink housewife kink

Would just lean back and smirk as she watches you, spooks you by coming up behind you and wrapping her arms around you, pries your hands off whatever you’re holding to bring them to her lips, stays distractingly close to you, pressed flush against your back

Ambessa

Beneath her. She has servants for that. But if you wanted to be all romantic and have a lovely, relaxing evening cooking with your wife, she’d reluctantly agree. I say wife because I think she’s the type to snatch up anything she wants as hers

She does occasionally cave to your demands but she really finds the whole ordeal tedious and unnecessary. Would try to sneak in one of the cooks when you weren’t looking

You come back from the bathroom to see her literally throw the chef in the pantry/out of your line of sight

“Darling!” She’ll chime, feigning nonchalance and sounding like you just came back from a year long trip

“Ambessa-“ You’d start to scold.

“No, no, he forgot his… spatula.”

“Spatula?”

“It’s his favorite. Right?”

She’ll try to convince you to just eat something raw. Voices her very loud opinion on which steps she deems a waste of time (waiting for water to boil)

“My heart, you don’t need to cook these. See?” Talks to you like you’re an imbecile and takes a chunk out of the still-moving lobster

Makes a show of tasting anything by vulgarly licking and sucking on her fingers

Vi?

No. She’d burn herself and whatever she’s attempting to cook. Either really raw or really burnt. You would have to banish her to the doorway because she just gets in the way. And she’d try to sneak tastes before it’s done, sticking those dirty ass, bandaged fingers in the pot, literally burning herself but still moving to stuff it in her mouth as she mutters “ow ow ow ow”

Whacking her hands with the spoon does nothing but make her pout and make you feel bad

She gets bored fast. Will turn around three seconds after you tell her not to do something and do it

Attempts to distract you. Will come up behind you, place her hands on your hips and start swaying with you, but she soon begins to misbehave and get carried away with neck kisses

You try to give her harmless tasks to keep her hyperactive brain satisfied. Maybe you’ll be successful when you ask her to show you what she was able to pickpocket/steal today

“That looks like it’s done.”

“10 more minutes, Vi.”

“But it’s all-“ She gestures desperately at the pasta. “Noodly.”

“Needs to soak.”

“… Can I just get mine then-“

“No.”

On an unnecessary, sadder note, I imagine she’s more goofy and laid back with you because you make her inner child feel safe.

Silco

Probably the only one who’s decent. He probably tried to learn more sophisticated things once he got rich, things he didn’t have the chance to when he was growing up in the undercity. Very fancy and by the book, serves irritatingly small portions. Wears an apron and mittens with his colors and you have to as well if you’re helping. Maybe one day you surprise him with a less elaborate dish, something messy

He would attempt to eat it with utensils before submitting to his roots and digging in with his hands

Okay but watching him chopping something, dress shirt sleeves rolled up on his forearms, dexterous fingers gripping the blade? Carving into it like he would flesh-

Jinx

Views the whole ordeal as a science experiment. What happens if you mix these ingredients together? She’ll find out!

You’ll constantly get whacked with those braids because she moves around the kitchen like a tornado

Wants to do everything right by your side. What are you working on? She can help. Wouldn’t it be so cute and romantic if you cut things together?

Chooses unnecessarily large knives for tasks that require small ones

“Toots! Wouldn’t it be faster if we used the flamethrower?”

You’d have to give Jinx her favorite juice and maybe she’ll be okay with sitting on the counter and watching you cook instead.

If she is, she’d make concerningly happy noises when you bend over or flex your muscles as you cut something up. You’d look over to see big blue eyes unabashedly staring at you, laying on her stomach, head in her hands as she kicks her feet

If she was in a more serious mood, she’d actually stun you with how precise she is. While she may be occasionally overzealous with some ingredients, she could be pretty decent if she tried. It’s like making a bomb, sort of.

[seas-storyarchive]

Date - genderbent au

[[MORE]]

"Alastriona, darling, tell me about your day." Rory said, as they were sat at a booth in a small cafe, having ran out of other meaningless dribble to speak of. In front of Alastriona was a coffee "as black as her soul" that had little grounds in it because she was feeling like an extra bit of bitterness today with a plate that had the specialty ham on rye bread. Not bad, lacked a bit of flavoring but otherwise passable for a sandwich.

Alastriona chuckled at his request, "there isn't much to tell, darling. Hotel business isn't all about managing people - it's paperwork, meetings.. blegh.." she looked at his face, seeing that adoring smile he always gave her. "Tell me about your day, dear."

The man chuckled as he was adding more sugar and cream to his tea and stirring them in. As to how he had no cavities, that was a miracle right there. "Aside from Susan causing trouble at the town meeting, nothing new occurred."

Rory had a plate of cake piled with strawberries and whipped cream in addition to his bowl of gumbo ("I want to try it to see how it measures up to the genuine article, darling." "If you end up liking that bowl of slop that dares compare itself to my cooking, I demand a divorce.") that had meat that tasted raw in a bad way and lacked the seasoning that Alastriona gave her dishes thus it was ignored and deemed slop.

Alastriona fought back a snort, rather unladylike noise honestly but especially in public with her husband, as she smiled at him in a similar manner to which he stared at her. "Well, that old hag never fails to ruin a moment."

They both laughed. Unaware they were being watched.

A sinner demon, their server, had seen the rings, and took a few snapshots - one of the two, and another two zoomed in on the rings.

Bingabonga added to timeline: Holy fuckking fuck!! Radio Demoness and Cannibal King on a date!?! And they're marrried!?!

She added the pictures and then resumed her job. Unaware of what she'd done.

--

Angel was scrolling through his phone, when he got a text from Cherri.

Cherri: hey, dipshit. what you know about this shit?? it's everywhere..

Cherri: [attached link]

Angel looked at it, and felt himself die again. He made a noise that drew everyone's attention.

"Angel?" Charlie was concerned, seeing the spider nearly foaming at the mouth.

The spider turned to Husk and Niffty, who had been playing a card game, looking out of his mind - and not in the usual way.

"Yous fucks know dhat Smiles is married to dhis fuckin' freak?" Angel showed them all his phone. Just in time for a ding to show another picture.

They had kissed. It looked like a chaste, quick, private kiss

"Fuck me to heaven and back." Husk said, not believing his eyes.

"Whoa! I can't wait to ask Miss Alastriona about this!" Niffty was grinning maniacally.

"Hang on - who the fuck would willingly pick Alastriona?" Vaggie asked. "I've heard of that guy's reputation for killing and eating his wife's after a time, so could that be it?" Should they do something? Don't get Vaggie wrong, she still had it out (derogatory) for Alastriona. But if this guy was a threat, they'd have to protect themselves and their friend from this man.

"No way!" Charlie jumped in. "I've met Rory, and saw them interact. She seemed genuinely happy to be around him when she brought me to Cannibal Town."

"Who knows? Maybe it's all for convenience sake?" Lucifer asked. "Wouldn't be the first time something like that has happened to people in their situation to deter unwanted attention."

"Luci, baby, does dhis look like convince ta you?" Angel showed the man his phone as another picture popped up - Rory was feeding Alastriona a forkful of sweet, sugary cake. Blasphemy! "Smiles don't touch sweets! She fuckin' hates them!"

Charlie screamed in excitement. "Let me see! Let me see!" When she saw the picture she screamed again, louder this time. "That's so romantic! Look at how they're looking at each other! Oh, they're so in love!"

"Angel." Husk said sternly, seeing the look on his face.

Angel looked hurt. "What? I just wanted to ask them how they mee-" his phone dinged again. "Dhey're on da move!"

--

The two were walking arm in arm through a park.

"You were right about that gumbo, it didn't taste right." Rory scrunched up his face in disgust.

Alastriona laughed, moving closer to him. "I told you~" she sang, moving a hand up to adjust his hat so the skull was more centered.

"Thank you, my love." Rory smiled, taking the hand she was moving away and pulling it to his lips to kiss her knuckle tenderly.

The cannibal deer chuckled. "Careful now darling, I'd be tempted to think you wanted a bite."

"Just a nibble~" Rory said, giving her fingers a very light nip and humming.

"I.. R- Rory.." Alastriona was keenly aware they were in a park - granted there was no one around - a blush heating up her face as she tore her eyes to look off to the side.

"What is it, my darling deer?" Rory brought them to a bench in that secluded spot.

"I.. I don't deserve your charm.. it.." her face was moved to look at his, and her lips were caught by Rory's own.

"Yes, you do. Remember how you told me that you grew up a Creole in the time that you did?" Rory asked when they pulled away, getting a nod in return. "And, what did I tell you?"

"That.." she took a breath, as those words stole them every time, "that you wished you could see me, before my death, and bask in my beauty as you do now." Fuck, was she about to cry?

Rory said nothing, pulling her close. He looked up, frowned, and reached into his inner coat pocket. He produced a handgun, pointed it in the direction he was frowing, and pulled the trigger. Twice. All without a word, as his wife started to sob into his chest. Being the most vulnerable she'd been with him for about a year. Wether or not she heard the shots, she didn't indicate.

--

"Holy.." The gang had just watched the whole thing, from the time the two walked into the park, to when Rory fired those shots and ended the feed in a screen full of static. And the one who held the camera.

"Fuckers." Husk said, angry.

"We're getting her a therapist." Lucifer said, grabbing his phone.

No one said anything else. They all agreed.

--

When Rory brought Alastriona back to the hotel, it was getting dark out, no trace of her crying was present. Good.

They found everyone in a sitting room, all waiting fro them.

"Hey, uh.. Ona?" Charlie decided to speak up after what felt like an eternity.

"Yes, Charlotte dear?" Ah, radio. Helped make her not feel so raw.

"How long have yous two been married?!" Angel couldn't hold it in anymore.

Alastriona's smile became a flustered blush like nothing they'd ever seen before. "Oh, oh! That little sinner decided to take a few snap shots? Well, to think we'd tipped her rather well. And recommended her to management for a promotion." Shit.. they just made it so the Demoness had lunch picked out for tomorrow.

"Darling." Rory said, honestly happy they could just be themselves around this bunch of misfits, caroling his wife's penchant for violence.

Alastriona sighed, leaning into Rory's side, still able to talk clearly. "We've been married for about.. 27 years."

Rory nodded happily, smiling as he saw everyone's mouths drop. Take that, you pack of degenerates. "Best 27 years of my life."

Alastriona laughed, her face still flustered, as everyone's brains melted out of their ears in shock. She laughed louder when Rory pulled her along out of the room.

"So, darling.. about that gumbo?"

"That's my love."

Angel was the first to speak, "what da hell..."

[niuniente]

Hi @niuniente! I just wanted to stop by and say your latest chapter of DeadHead with Alrick was amazing! I loved how surprised he was when the musician kissed him, but also how pleased he was with her happiness🥰

Just curious- will Alrick have a romantic partner in the future? Is he even looking or is he more focused on his job, friends, and plants? Also: does Alrick have an angry streak when people he deems “innocent” get the raw end of the deal? (Totally understandable if that’s the case, I’d be inclined to feel the same way)

Sending much love your way, your artwork and stories are a joy, thank you for sharing them!❤️

I think Alrick is sort of like me; he's the happiest when he can make others happy. I think when it comes to his aggressive side, he uses it for justice and fairness - which he deems himself as what's fair and what's not. He's got a good heart and a good head on his shoulders but we've also seen so far him making mistakes with his judgement. That's only human and I wish Alrick not to become some sort of a distant superhero. He's just some guy.

Right when DHD started, people wanted to know if Alrick was single and would there be romance. I said that I want to keep Alrick single due the episodic nature of the comic. If Alrick had a girlfriend, I would have to include her in the comics (aka break the episodic nature). Also, protagonist's girlfriend can't be just a concept but a tangible, real person, who we see within the story equal to the protagonist. It's not good storytelling if readers are told that Alrick has a girlfriend but then he rarely spends time with her and her existence doesn't affect Alrick's daily life. That's a side note date, not a girlfriend and I don't want to treat my girls like that.

Alrick being single has been my darling concept as he has sort of a lone wolf-vibe in him, but recently, I've been thinking "what if?" I happened to listen to an interview of my dear friend Laura Mauro, who is a professional multi-awarded author and a senior game script writer - in short, Laura writes for their living. Laura said in the interview how we all creative people have to be willing to kill our darlings when the story demands it.

And, I think, it is my time to kill this darling, and open the door for the possibility for Alrick having at least some sort of a romantic adventure within the story in the future, when it presents itself naturally. After all, I feel I would be fooling myself if I told everyone that don't limit your creative expression and then intentionally limited it myself.

[silent-dragon]

TWST Idol AU

Introducing...

(art by @/celiica @/frankenhoez)

W.W.W. - A J-Pop boy band with fashionable looks and a desire to soothe you with their voices.

(art by @/celiica @/frankenhoez)

Bitting Moon - Punk Rock boy band of wolves who are all about expressing themselves as they see fit,careful they may bite..

Band member info below

(From left to right: Cashmere,Lycra,Satine) (art by @/celiica @/frankenhoez)

W.W.W. Members(name is pronounced "Three W")

💗

Stage Name - Lycra

Real Name - Lustre RoseQuartz

Age - 21

Bio - The main vocalist and outfit supervisor of the group. Some will say he is the face of the group but don't let him hear you say that as he prefers the three of them as equal faces of three W. He has a very at first surprising soft deep voice that you don't expect to come out of his mouth. Always dressed so stylish with accessories to match casually so the looks of the group always are on point and he never will let one of the others go out dressed badly even when Cashmere may test him. Loves being more up close with fans by extending his hand out for one or more to touch briefly and always kisses his signature on items they want him to sign. Leaves a faint strawberry scent with every kiss.

💗

Stage Name - Cashmere

Real Name - Tomoai Lyra

Age - 19

Bio - The rapper and suekko(youngest) of the group. Deemed the cute or baby one of the group by fans given his look. He definitely agrees he is very cute but goes further to say he is the most sexy one too. The way he speaks is however not as cute as has a distinct tone and is more spoken word then singing so was given the rapper role of the group,some find his raw speech as cute still. Always sporting very deep V-cut to open tops,short shorts,and thigh socks all in cute colors or patterns. Is the one usually spotted or captured on a fan's phone camera giving a seductive pose. His social media is filled with selfies in different outfits where he asks fans or others how he looks often. Also the group selfie taker,gets the other 2 to take photos that just makes fans swoon and think of him and Lycra as dating often..they are not.

💗

Stage Name - Satine

Real Name - Ivy Caskcut

Age - 21

Bio - The sub vocalist of the group and a professional lyricist. Known as the one who you're most likely to find randomly in public as Satine enjoys spending time in small public places like coffee shops,small business restaurants,or parks just casually reading or writing. He works as an independent romance author as well so is the busiest of the group writing stuff for his publisher and songs for the group. Voice is the most feminine of the group and contrasts well with Lycra's. Always suggests the group do a lingerie shoot to boost fan support but Lycra says they don't need to but it's not out of the question yet. Has a romantic aura about him that when you speak to him sometimes people who are attracted to being sweet talked it feels like he is doing just that.

(From left to right: Balto,Spike,Chip)(art by @/celiica @/frankenhoez)

Bitting Moon Members

🌙

Stage Name - Spike

Real Name - Jesh Howlett

Age - 21

Bio - The main vocalist and lead guitarist of the group. Loud and sometimes obnoxious wolfman who comes off as very selfish. His look of ripped clothing,dog collars,no shirt,bright hair,and abs is what a lot of fans point out they like about him,a dangerous person but collars give a "tameable" look. He is the face of the group of course with appearing on ads that are always sensually charged of him half clothed,collar,and chains plus pet phrases as slogans. Known to not want to share anything he deems as his like food,clothing,etc and will get upset if you touch without permission. Gets the crowd going by near perfectly howling,barking,and/or growling loud into the mic at random moments during a song. Unknown to fans backstage and when not in the spotlight he is not as feral and has a sweet side to him. Always butting heads with Chip and giving Balto questionable dating advice.

🌙

Stage Name - Chip

Real Name - Terry Lance

Age - 22

Bio - The sub vocalist and bass guitarist of the group. If Spike seems unbearable to most thankfully Chip is similar but more pleasant to be around as he is not as rude. That doesn't mean he is the complete opposite though as he can be just as loud but is mindful of others and isn't selfish. His look with the glasses gives him a cute nerd type look which makes him stand out to some fans as they love that idea of him being that. Some mystery resides around him as he has large claw scars on his back seen once or twice hence him not being fully shirtless alot. The fact that even on stage Spike and him seem to be competing has encouraged fans to side their feelings to one of them secretly. Is better at flirting with others then Spike the normal way…if Spike flirted the normal way..

🌙

Stage Name - Balto

Real Name - Tarak Joshi

Age - 18

Bio - The drummer of the group. The young pup as the other two call him of the trio. He is very different then the others as not very feral with coming off as shy most times. He never expects fans or the camera to want to go to him so often is caught off-guard and panics. Known for looking so tough with face tattoo and scars but is so soft and sweet in person. His ears and tail tend to give away how he is feeling. Has a big smile on face when drumming fans find so cute. Is the one that gets the cute puppy comments or mainly none of the more mature stuff the other two get. He wants to hold a better, more mature image without being rude or obnoxious but seems that's what's in for their group. Super clean friendly as he can't stand being physically dirty at all and is quick to leave and shower after a show. Does have a fierceness about him if someone tries to treat him like a kid too much. Is only a rumor but Spike treated him this way for too long and often says now that pup has a scary arm swing.

[neutralexist]

on platonic love and introversion - 1/23

I’ve given up on any semblance of effort in my writing - outlines, pre contrived subject matter, or relevant “hot topic” chatter, and am instead focusing all my literary energy on something much simpler - life. Specifically, my life, as that is the only reality I grasp enough to have deep, pervasive thoughts about. 

So what has January brought me? At first I was thinking (endlessly) about the idea of home - what is it, how do I capture it, is it an achievable object or emotional environment/state of being? - then considered waxing poetic about my experiences with romantic love, past, present, and future in a preemptive examination of February. But these topics seem to be more ongoing explorations: things I have not yet settled into or pursued sufficiently to fully understand. So, I have instead settled on the exploration of two not entirely separate topics, but ones that I understand to be different to the aforementioned ideas: Platonic Love and Introversion. 

While I deem most self-prescriptive terminology clumsy, lacking nuance, and overly saturated online these days, I am, or have become, an introvert. And I think this shocks people.

Upon meeting, I am endlessly and embarrassingly chatty, witless and witty - a far cry from the shy, word-stumbling “introvert” popular media so desperately clings to. And while that expression of myself is me, it is also equally not me. There is so much to the carefully constructed social facing Lily - not for manipulation or show or networking or clout or any other surface level thing people adjust their social personas for - but simply for energy. I, for as much as I enjoy, love even, being with others, do not feel like I fully exist within these interactions. 

I fully, deeply love my friends - wholeheartedly and authentically (really starting to dislike that word, “authentically”, but in this case it rings true). But I am not undone by my friends. And I am most myself when I am undone. Raw, unmonitored, uncurated. I struggle often with my own earnestness. I am aware of, even practiced in, withholding earnestness from others because I’ve been made aware it’s draining for others to have to bear me, the whole me. So I detach. Against my nature, I detach. Instead, emptying myself.

Introversion has become the… tool (?)  to navigate the consequences of my own openness. I don’t think introversion and earnestness are inherently in conflict, but over the years, I have done more than pit them against each other; I’ve put them at war. Being alone is my white flag, surrendering to both and to neither. It allows time to reflect on and heal the damages of war. 

In all my earnestness, I love my friends, endlessly, but I am not wholly undone by them. 

. 

“It's not about looking at each other

 But together in the same direction”

Ultimately, this speaks more to my ability ( or lack thereof) to recognize and comfortably exist in the simple love of others. I have been thinking about the quote above lately and have found it unbearably resonant of my own habits. I tend to look at others, across times, places, emotions, thoughts, and only note the vastness between it all. Is love - platonic or otherwise - not a two way street? An act of multiples? I’ve been so blind to the love of others, friends particularly. Is it not better to look at something and glean the possibility of a differing view than be disappointed the beauty is not fully, single mindedly shared? Perhaps, the beauty comes from being able to share all the lovely parts.

Suddenly, I am feeling much like Dickens’ infamous Ebenezer- Waking up on the final day, hoping it’s not too late. I have not always been this way - introverted, blind, and hyper, overly intentional. I strayed, became disoriented. I lost my ability to feel love from others, to allow myself to receive love from others years ago - though my ability to see love has been untouched. Is platonic love not the foundation of all abilities and forms of love? If I call out and someone answers, is the act of answering not as important or perhaps more important than the answer? Why haven’t I been listening? I was deafened. I remember the blows. I have noted and can trace each misleading path; My only hope now is to undo it. 

Earnesty is not a crime. Openness is not a battle. They are small things, allowances of insight and beauty. They are things to be experienced through others in tandem with oneself. Maybe feeling is less draining when you allow the feelings of others to fill the space left behind. When I call, there is an answer. What a beautiful thing it is to have an answer… something to think about, something to reckon with, something to savor and take in and fill with. 

One can only be undone if aware of the doing. Friendship, platonic love, is the doing. 

Introversion is a state of being. It can change. It can be undone.

[evilhomestuckposter]

BREAKFAST IN BED - FIC (read below link)

Karkat had been hard at work for several hours preparing breakfast for his human boyfriend/matesprail. He had been assured by Kanaya that Dave would love it, though he wasn’t entirely certain what humans saw as breakfast food. Still, he had gotten the idea around five in the morning when he still couldn’t sleep. It wasn’t like he ever got tired of cuddling with Dave, but, for all his assholery, he wanted to do something nice. He knew that he could be abrasive, so he tried his best to make sure Dave knew he was serious about him. Of course, it helped that he was one of the only ones on the meteor who knew how to cook. 

Humming a human pop song to himself, he finished cooking the “steak” he had alchemized, knowing that humans couldn’t exactly eat raw meat. He found it a bit funny, but definitely didn’t want to make one of the many, many, many mistakes that seemed to make humans sick. Even god tier ones. 

Having seen this meal in a human rom-com, he had deemed it romantic enough to make for breakfast. By the time he had finished the full meal, several hours later, he had managed to alchemize a covered serving dish and some flowers too, just like in the movie. 

Placing everything on the tray, he carefully made his way to his respiteblock, where he knew Dave was asleep, appreciating the quiet of the meteor at the early hour. Making his way into the room, he paused slightly, blood-pusher giving a little jump at the way Dave hugged the pillow to his chest. 

Karkat cleared his throat softly, trying to keep his voice uncharacteristically gentle so as not to startle him awake. 

“Dave?” He whispered a bit hesitantly, suddenly feeling very vulnerable. Just because he hadn’t gotten any sleep didn’t mean he should deprive his human boyfriend of it. Karkat set down the tray, beginning to wonder if he had been selfish, as usual. Maybe this had been a bad idea after all. He cursed under his breath, running a hand through his hair and messing with the hem of his sweater. 

“Dave,” he repeated, a bit louder. Still no response. Deciding to try a different approach, he shuffled closer, ignoring the nagging feeling that this had been a bad idea. He pressed a kiss to Dave’s forehead, gently brushing his boyfriend’s hair out of his face. 

At that, Dave wrinkled his nose slightly. His eyes fluttered open, and he squinted up at the other. 

“Hey, ‘Kat,” he yawned, “'s early,” he mumbled.

“Uh- yeah,” replied Karkat, shifting his weight from foot to foot. “I made you breakfast,” he said, his tone as though he had gotten caught doing something bad. 

That woke Dave up.

“Really? Oh hell yeah, thanks!” He sat up, rubbing his eyes tiredly. “That’s really sweet of you.”

Karkat fought back a slight smile, glad that he was pleased. He nodded, grabbing the tray and setting it in Dave’s lap.

“Yep, simmered barkbeast!” Karkat joked, crawling to sit next to Dave in bed.

Dave did a double take, eyes widening slightly. 

“Wait- what?” 

“Kidding, it’s ‘steak,’ for humans. I alchemized a human cookbook after seeing it in a movie we watched.” Karkat laughed softly to himself at Dave’s reaction before pausing. “I hope it’s okay.”

Dave took a bite enthusiastically.

“It’s great, thanks Karkles,” he ruffled Karkat’s hair. 

Karkat narrowed his eyes slightly at the nickname. 

“I can still take it back, asswipe,” he huffed, trying to fix his already unruly hair. There was no real malice behind the comment. 

Dave laughed, and Karkat bit back another smile, leaning into his side. 

After a few minutes of quiet conversation, Dave finished and set the tray aside as Karkat stifled a yawn. 

“How much did you sleep last night? It’s like- exactly seven o’ two. This must have taken you several hours,” Dave questioned, noticing the increased prominence of the bags under Karkat’s eyes. 

“I didn’t,” he admitted, chewing his bottom lip.

Dave stared at his lips and the sharpness of his teeth for a few seconds before snapping out of it. They could kiss later. 

“The night before?” Dave asked, brushing his thumb over Karkat’s lower lip.

“Not many,” he yawned again. “You know how I get though, I’ll be okay.” 

Dave raised an eyebrow. “Not many-? Babe, you should get some sleep.” 

Karkat just flipped him off, though with no real meaning behind the gesture. “There’s things to do though, I have humans to kiss,” he whined, leaning a bit closer. 

Dave found his glance back on Karkat’s lips, and he was quiet for a moment. Finally, he spoke up, forcing himself to meet his eyes again. 

“Listen, you know me. I am all about quality smooching time. I am all over that like you wouldn’t believe. I’m all over that like marinara is all over pasta, you know, I’m-” Dave stopped himself before he started to ramble, “-you get it.” 

Karkat furrowed his brows. “Not really. What’s marinara?” 

Dave laughed. “It’s- well, it doesn’t matter. The point is, as much as I’d like to kiss in bed all day, you need to get some sleep.”

Karkat frowned. “I’ll lay down and cuddle you, but that doesn’t mean I’ll sleep. And I’ll only do it for a kiss. A real one.” 

“You drive a hard bargain, Mr. Vantas,” replied Dave, cupping his face and kissing him deeply. 

Karkat hummed, glad to have gotten his way. He eagerly reciprocated the kiss, bringing a hand to the back of Dave’s head and tangling it in his hair. 

After a few minutes, Dave reluctantly pulled away, pressing one last kiss to his forehead. 

“Alright ‘Kat, sleep time.”

Karkat groaned, rolling his eyes, but he laid down anyway, wrapping his arms around Dave’s waist. He glanced nervously up at the vents, as he usually did before sleeping, and then looked back at Dave. 

“And you’ll be here?”

“Always,” replied Dave softly. 

A few minutes later, Karkat was fast asleep, a soft purr emanating from his chest, and Dave was sure he had never been happier. 

[whoreofabaddon]

I'm still high enough on the thrill of finally getting tickets to Rasputin that I've convinced myself to finally write about my desire to just mercilessly bully Hozier about the whole dispute between him and Sergei Polunin.

I suppose it would be easy to say that I'm overly defensive of Sergei Polunin, and I’ll be honest that I’m certainly gentler with him than I might be to most men. I've found a lot of comfort in what he's done through the years, in the beauty and rawness of his dancing, the way he's talked about love, and even in his honesty about his self-destructive journey. It takes a great deal of strength and vulnerability to admit to self-mutilation, eating disorders, addiction, brain damage and sexual abuse.

I think that all of that pain is so obvious in the video he did for Take Me to Church. And I think that Hozier saw that and he did something truly beautiful when he wrote Sergei’s name into Movement (and had him star in the video). The lyric ‘I'm put in awe of something so flawed and free’ is genuinely romantic and you can see a bit of allusion to Sergei’s desire to forsake dance when he made the Take Me to Church video when Hozier goes on to describe the beauty that comes in having nothing left to lose. The way Sergei talked about hearing that song and the impact that it had on him…it was a truly touching moment in the same way that Hozier had felt so moved at seeing his song being used earlier. 

Could there be anything more pure than their mutual inspiration from one another’s art?

It's impossible to deny that Hozier is a truly talented lyricist and singer. I genuinely love his music but sometimes I can't help but feel that he's almost performative in his demonstration of being 'enlightened.' It took him what? Three seconds to condemn the man that he’d built up this connection to because Sergei stated a disdain for the trend of removing gendered roles from classical ballet.

What irritates me about this is that allowing men to perform en pointe has always been controversial in the world of ballet, and Sergei was hardly the first person to find it distasteful. There’s a relationship to certain physical sex-based attributes, there’s a debate about the merit of allowing men to take something from women that could limit women’s roles, and there’s even a pretty solid history of putting men en pointe to mime women who aren’t deemed sexually desirable.

Sergei doesn’t have the language to say any of that, he doesn’t have the education that many others benefit from, and he certainly doesn’t have the cultural tendency to dance around his point. It’s absurd to expect that someone speaking his third language who has a 7th grade education is going to phase things like a professor of gender studies! It’s infuriating also that people took his (admittedly) poorly phrased comment and rapidly added their own homophobic projections onto him. (And when Sergei spoke in Russian he said quite clearly “I cannot support men who lack the talent of women, and are permitted to do less but receive more because they are men.”)

 A man who has openly admitted to being comfortable ‘kissing with tongue’ with gay friends, has snuggled himself between ex-husbands Dolce and Gabbana, has tattooed his gay idol on himself, and frequently acknowledges his career is owed to gay men….is not suddenly homophobic because he doesn’t believe men should wear pointe shoes. Frankly, its far more homophobic to suggest that gay men clearly must preform female roles in ballet than anything he’s ever said. 

But how does this link back to my anger at Hozier?

It was so easy for Hozier to just dismiss Sergei even after acknowledging that he was incredibly kind and gentle when he met him. Hozier prioritized the morality of a mob on the internet (who aren’t even knowledgeable about the world of ballet) because they knew what words to use. Because Sergei was relying on a third language, because he’s uneducated, because he’s mentally ill, because he’s from a different culture…it was more satisfying to assume that he’s secretly hateful than it was admit that maybe his life experiences have molded him into something different than the perfect ideal of a troubled artist. 

It was easy enough to use his face, his name, his image…up until it came time to realize that he wasn’t an upper middle class Westerner. The second he needed support because he displayed those demons that Hozier had once appreciated, in any way other than scarring his pretty body, he was easy to throw to the wolves. 

[denimbex1986]

'Over the last two decades, filmmaker Andrew Haigh has solidified himself as a prominent queer voice within film and television. From his 2011 romantic drama Weekend to his work behind HBO’s cult hit series Looking, spanning two seasons and one feature-length special. Haigh further establishes this acclaimed body of queer media with All of Us Strangers, an adaptation of the novel Strangers by Taichi Yamada, that employs enough elements of fantasy, death and graphic sex to put Game of Thrones to shame.

The film plays as a fantastical but gut-wrenching ‘what-if’, following the isolated and emotionally stunted Adam (Andrew Scott), shaped as such by the trauma of losing his parents at age 12 in a fatal car crash. A death which he deems “not the most original” in his own words. This isolation is demonstrated through the empty and eerily silent tower block in which he lives. Adam is frequently shown looking down over the city of London through his large voyeuristic windows, locking himself away as the cliché tortured writer that he is.

His internal struggle with loneliness also stems from his feelings of being a social outsider as a gay man, which prevents him from forming any real emotional connections and rejecting those who try. Amongst these is Harry (Paul Mescal), the only other resident of the building who drunkenly turns up on his doorstep with an offer of some company. As Adam learns to accept his vulnerability and let people in, he sparks a passionate, loving relationship with Harry (cue intimate sex scenes galore). Alongside this, he opens his buried traumatic past through the fantastical, ‘what-if’ reunion that he is granted with his deceased parents.

Claire Foy and Jamie Bell deliver two equally incredible performances as Adam’s parents, both trapped within the 1980s of Adam’s childhood memories, yet somewhat aware of their tragic fates in a very dark exploration of death and lost parental love.

All of Us Strangers is nuanced in its undefined and abstract approach to these encounters, they are seemingly both a figment of his imagination as well as more than just memories. They almost haunt the in-between of dream and reality, for which they push Adam to just be grateful for instead of questioning why.

Two particularly poignant scenes come in the moments that Adam shares with each parent individually, finally coming out to his mother which is something he was robbed of, as well as his emotionally raw conversation with his father about the unspoken bullying he suffered as a child. It’s a moment that touches upon the masculinity and shame that links to his identity as a gay man.

The two scenes speak to the huge developments in gay rights, activism and social change made in Britain since the 1980s. In particular, the effect that growing up gay during the AIDs epidemic has had on a generation of men producing forms of heavy shame and alienation that persist today. The way the film connects Adam’s queer identity to themes of familial relations and childhood trauma is a testament to Haigh’s skills as a writer. I implore people to watch All of Us Strangers, even just to experience the scene in which Jamie Bell breaks Andrew Scott (and the audience) by saying: “I’m sorry I never came into your room when I heard you crying.”

Scott’s leading role is one deserving of so much recognition, but with the way award season seems to be going, we may have to settle for the masses of unanimously positive Letterboxd reviews. He so sensitively embodies the emotions and fears of 12-year-old Adam, unlocking them through the flicker of an eyelid or the waiver of his voice, carrying the emotional weight of the film confidently on his shoulders.

Mescal, the internet’s newest obsession, also delivers a standout performance, especially going off his countless nominations and BAFTA recognition for the role. Nevertheless, his northern accent does leave something to be desired. He seems to shift between multiple regions, landing somewhere between Yorkshire and Manchester before letting his own Irish accent slip through, made worse by his attempts at a flirtatious ‘gay voice’ for lack of better words.

However, it’s undeniable that despite this, he delivers a powerfully tragic performance in the final moments of All of Us Strangers as a part of its M. Night Shyamalan-esque twist, somewhat selling an ending that otherwise may have fallen short.

The four lead performers each take turns of equal responsibility in making the film what it is, a genuinely nuanced journey of grief and loss. All of Us Strangers earnestly explores the ways in which choosing to express and voice forms of love can help to heal even the most unreachable parts of yourself, a message set to the striking melody and lyrics of the 1984 classic ‘The Power of Love’.

5/5'

[contenttobeslightlyforlorn]

I have this cloying fear that I’ll never be loved the way I so desperately crave

I understand that in these modern times, they speak of there being no magic in love, that love is chosen and built and endured

To be honest, that sentiment kills me.

The idea that being swept away, enamored, absolutely bursting with love for someone is not only rare, but dangerous, buries me in sorrow so deep, it is sometimes difficult to breathe

That butterflies, sparks, and whirlwinds aren’t signs of rightness, but of things that may trigger long-past traumas is heartbreaking

I want romance

I have always been quite the romantic, though it may not always be apparent

Thus it is truly crushing, wanting to believe in the possibility of profoundly romantic ideals, and being met with psychology and science and apathy

It hurts, it aches

I oftentimes find myself at such a loss, for how could I ever settle for what this modern world deems love when all I want is anything and everything

Though I do, admittedly, tend towards isolation and independence, I want to feel such raw emotion for another that it almost kills me

Maybe that’s sardonic in nature, that I might want what hurts me

But isn’t that how it’s always been?

My grief and my love are two sides of one coin, strong feelings that wreck me

I do not want it to be different, but I am starting to doubt if there’s a place in this world for such romantic notions anymore

and I ache

[random-yandere-fandom]

Ahh I love Akame ga kill! Could I request some General HCs for Esdeath? She’s such a cool character, and her and Akame are my favorties (I hope that you have a lovely day/night wherever you are, I wish you luck on not burning out! (●’◡’●)/ )

Incredible. I thought people just didn't watch this but here it is, the proof that this wonderful anime gets appreciated. Hell yeah.

Thanks a lot btw!

Yandere Esdeath headcanons

So this is quite easy as she is a canon yandere, she is obsessive, possessive, protective and I’d even say she’s delusional. She is powerful and feared, efficient and cruel, calculating and ruthless. That whole demeanor changes when she is around you. Yes, she loves to battle, the rush of being the strongest, of being the fastest and best fighter there might be. And while she would not want to miss that, she also wishes for other experiences. A first crush, confessing ones feelings, going on cute dates, impressing her partner with her raw and unmatched ability, taking a breather to just look at the world and it’s beauty.

That’s were you come in. You were just so cute in her eyes, headstrong and fierce but kind and seemingly innocent with a smile she fell for the moment she first saw it. From then on, you found yourself having the most fierce self proclaimed lover one could even imagine. She’d immediately go over to courting you, blushing and giggling an almost scary amount, those that had seen her in action shivering at the sudden shift of personality. 

Flowers, chocolate, paintings and so on, anything she could get her hands on for you she got. It doesn’t matter that she threatened those close to you for your personal information. Yet she is extremely ecstatic when she can get you something that you yourself told her you like, giddily watching your reaction even closer than normal. Be careful to like her gifts, especially when they were hand made by her, if you refuse them for too long Esdeath will be in quite the bad mood, not that she would let you see that, but everyone else should better hide upon sight.

She will find a way to insert herself into your life, suddenly appearing everywhere you are and striking up a conversation, not even trying to hide her advances. At first you’re more than likely to get surprised, terrified even, everyone, including you, knows who Esdeath is, and her randomly meeting you everywhere is surely a bad sign. However, it’s hard to keep thinking that way when she acts so clearly love-struck, hearts practically floating around her whenever she is with you. At worst you might find her creepy but there is nothing you can do about that, as if you would tell her that to the face.  

She’ll plan out dates with you that you didn’t even agree to, but too bad, your employer also somehow gave you the exact day off so there is no way you could refuse the offer. The time spend with you will be romantic in all aspects, she’ll have rented out the best restaurants, having them covered in your favorite flowers; she’ll go sightseeing with you, using her power to create platforms of ice to get a better view of your surroundings; she’ll go shopping with, enjoying the hustle around the two of you as if she was an average person. There will always be something new to do with her and if you’re interested she’d love to take you to other countries, too, though you have to expect that she’ll first wipe out their military, giving you a first class seat to watch as she tears through their armies as if it was nothing. You are welcome to join her if you want, you fighting by her side is a dream come true for her.

When the two of you have gotten to know each other enough, she will deem it time that you move in together. The two of you are fated to be either way, so who cares when she only met you a week ago. The preparations will be over with quickly and suddenly all your essentials will be moved to your new home, be that with your consent or without.

There will be some people that will try to take advantage of your new position. Rest assured though, Esdeath will make sure that no one will try to use you or mess with you, their head rolling on the ground before they can even further plan out how to manipulate you. You are hers and while she fully believes in your strength, there is no way she’ll let you get caught up in politics, those bastards will have to search for another way to make her do their biding outside of the battle field, as if they could achieve that.

[i-write-boop-spoops]

Volo NSFW Alphabet

It seems only fitting that to welcome this man I thirst so much for to this blog, that I do a NSFW alphabet for him. Thank you to the anon who immediately requested this after I added him to the list! You’re a legend!

This goes without saying but this is very NSFW. Reader’s gender is ambiguous! Also PLA spoilers?? (As in Volo’s arc)

NSFW under the cut!

A = Aftercare (what are they like after sex?)

After all the hard work you’ve done to please him, all those punishments you’ve taken, what kind of a man would he be if he didn’t tend to your every whim?

He takes care with cleaning you, tending to you, holding you, making you feel loved and safe. You’ve done so well… it’s the least he can do

B = Body part (what is their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner?)

On himself, it’s his face, no question, no doubt. He is effortlessly beautiful, in an alluring, androgynous manner. He often fancies himself the perfect specimen, perhaps Arceus’s greatest achievement (If only he could meet them)

He’s greedy, he has two favourites on you. Your lips and hips.

Oh yes, those pretty lips that sing his name so sweetly, that stretch to take his length so well. Those beautiful hips that he grabs and grasps and bruises and tugs and pulls and prods and sinks his teeth into, they accentuate your frame so perfectly.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum)

He likes to spill it across your stomach and chest, or give you a facial if he's feeling in a particularly degrading mood.

If you're good, if he deems you worthy of receiving such a precious gift, he will cum inside you

D = Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs)

Gets off on the idea that Arceus is not only watching the two of you do it, but that they approve and encourage it.

Arceus does not think that way, they wants you whores to stop invoking their name when you fuck

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Before you, no one took his fancy, no one was good enough to receive him… you are his one and only.

He is quite knowledgeable, he has read up on the subject many times, maybe he’s even watched it occur, so he has a decent grasp of it. With you, with time, he becomes immaculate in bed.  

F = Favourite Position

Him sitting down somewhere, a throne maybe? You on his lap, riding him, his hands on your hips, bringing you up and down just how he likes it.

In this position or others, you have to face each other. He needs to see your face twisted in pleasure by him, see those lips form circles that leak the most wonderful sounds, catch your shame-and-ecstasy-filled gaze.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment or humorous?)

Mostly on the serious side, having sex, being inside you, he thinks it quite special and profound, even if he’s being rough and raw with you.

He does get a bit jokey when teasing you, but it’s light and not very common.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes?)

He is perfectly manscaoed/completely bald down there. But it would have been more golden-brown than blonde.

I wanna say I have an explanation for this but I don’t

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? are they romantic?)

While he does love you, and does express an, admittedly twisted, form a love to you during sex, I wouldn’t say he’s romantic in bed.

He’s intimate in a different way. Every time he has sex with you, he considers it almost a holy act, definitely a special union, so he treats it with the respect and thought it calls for.

You are his, you are perfect, you are the only person he would ever share such moments with. There is an immense weight in that.

J = Jack Off (masturbation headcanon.)

He’s away a lot, so he finds himself turning to his hand to fulfil a role you usually play. Tends to be quite furious with it, much like he is fucking you. I imagine he likes to keep a piece of your clothing with him, sometimes breathing in your scent while imagining being inside you.

On numerous occasions, he’s tied you up and jerked off, leaving you painfully wanting.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks.)

Heavy dom/sub vibes, a lot of worship and praise. Usually he is your God, or the closest being to one, and you dutifully follow every commandment, sometimes he is merciful and kind, sometimes he is decidedly not.

And when he is the worshipper, he is dutiful and obedient, finding great pride and pleasure in serving you.

Naturally such things involve a lot of restraints ;)

Also if applicable, I feel like breeding would totally be a major kink of his. What better way to claim you than to have you carry his child?

L = Location (where are their favourite places to do the do?)

He’s a travelling merchant, so for him, anywhere dry and sheltered is fair game, a tent, a cave, beneath a tree. He definitely prefers doing it outside, but wouldn’t say no to staying over in your home in Jubilife village for a night ;)

Really really wants to fuck in the Temple of Sinnoh

Also he kinda wants to fuck in the ancient retreat, but he does not want to incur Cogita’s wraith.

M = Motivation (what turns them on and gets them going?)

Seeing your skin wet from the bath, the elegance of your fancy kimonos, watching you dress/undress, your shyness and fluster, your smile...

These bewitchments you cast on him seem to become exponentially more powerful the closer he comes to achieving his goals.

N = NO (is there something they wouldn’t do? what are their turn-offs?)

He would never share you. While you are together, you are his, nobody else is good enough to delight in you. Not when you have him to sate you so thoroughly.

Also while he loves to dish out pain and degradation, he does not like receiving it in return.

O = Oral (do they prefer giving or receiving? how skilled are they?)

Nothing makes him feel more powerful than to see you on your knees, between his thighs, tentatively licking and sucking his cock like the obedient little pet you are. He loves lacing his fingers in your hair and sharply tugging whenever you do something particularly pleasurable.

That being said, he is no slacker when it comes to reciprocating. He loves making you orgasm with just his mouth, it feels him with immense pride and satisfaction.

Loves when you smush his face between your thighs.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough or slow and sensual?)

Almost always rough, though pace varies if he’s feeling more rabid or wants to really take his time torturing you.

Rarely, he’ll be softer with you, in very special intimate moments, where he’s uncharacteristically vulnerable.

Q = Quickie (what is their opinion on quickies over proper sex? how often do they have quickies?)

While he loves taking his time with you… he’s almost always on the go, so quickies are bound to happen. A good chunk of your encounters are this way.

He does enjoy them, he thinks the time pressure adds a satisfying thrill. Seeing you hurriedly make yourself decent after he’s just wrecked you is icing on the cake for him.

R = Risk (are they willing to experiment? do they take risks?)

Absolutely! He loves to learn, loves to experience new things. Nearly any new way he can punish or pleasure you is worth at least a look in to.

As much as he wants people to know you belong solely to him, and that you love to be taken by him, he also wants to keep up his little inconspicuous merchant façade, so he tries not to get caught when he’s screwing you silly.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

About two rounds, but it’s usually just the one. He loves to draw it out.

T = Toy (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He’s a trader of goods, so I imagine he’s encountered  some… unique goods in his time. Goods he loves to use on you.

Particularly he likes ones he can leave inside you, that you feel throughout the day, that you’re not allowed remove until he says so

U = Unfair (how much do they like to tease?)

King of teasing. He just has so much fun riling you up and pulling away when you need him most. He thinks you look best naked and flustered beyond belief.

V = Volume (how loud are they? what sounds do they make?)

Melodic moans and tender mewls, along with purrs of praise and cruel words.

He’s on the quieter side, but you can occasionally elicit a particularly loud groan out of him.

W = Wild Card (a random nsfw headcanon.)

A biter. Definitely a biter. You are lucky that the time period mostly demands modesty… the marks he’s left on you are plenty and everywhere.

X = X-Ray (what’s going on in those pants?)

There’s a reason his clothes are so baggy 👀

Considering that he thinks he a. deserves to meet God, and b. should destroy and reshape the world in his own image, he definitely has a massive schlong to match such a huge ego.

It’s very long, and somewhat thick. Extremely aesthetically pleasing (if that’s something you can apply to be a penis lol)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

The more you get to know each other, the more unhinged he gets, the more and more he wants-no, needs you.

At first it’s fairly low, maybe once or twice a week, but it quickly escalates. If he could have you multiple times a day, every day, that would be heaven for him.

He wouldn’t need Arceus then lol

Z = ZZZ (how quickly do they fall asleep afterward?)

Not quickly at all. Sure, it calms him, clears his mind, but it doesn’t make him very tired. Sometimes he fucks you and just… continues on with his day, while he leaves you snug in bed. Though occasionally, he’s so worn that he’ll just hold you and fall sound asleep a few minutes later.

[proserpina-magnus]

Regulus Black dating a muggleborn

word count: 2863

[ warning; gender neutral reader, mention of death, description of crying, angst, no happy fucking ending, swearing, mention of lap sitting (none sexual), kissing, awkward teen love, regulus is kind of edgy and a dick sometimes ]

Fanon Regulus, not Canon. This doesn't line up with anything canon! So please do not take this seriously.

- Did I say dating? I meant secretly dating.

- Regulus spotted you studying alone at a table in The Three Broomsticks, he just couldn't hide the part of him that felt an intriguing feeling towards you.

- He asked a few people around, nudging them and gesturing towards you, asking a small "who are they?"

- It took him a few days to finally get someone to answer him and once he knew your name, he knew he'd fallen into a rabbit hole. he couldn't stop thinking about you, his mind twirling around your name in a constant spiral.

- Luckily, you had been partnered with him for a potions assignment. he couldn't talk to you, he couldn't even mutter a "hi" he was so nervous.

- He had never felt this nervous feeling in his stomach, it was coming to the point it was drowning him.

- Finally, the next day during potions he was able to gain enough courage and actually talk to you about the project, though his voice sounded so mellow and drawn out, like honey.

- He didn't try to engage in conversation other than the assignment, so when you offered that you and him could go to the library and do a bit more research, he said yes almost immediately.

- You both decided to go after dinner since the library wasn't as filled in the evening.

- So when he came back to his dorm after eating, he tried to change into something more casual than his school uniform. it took him a good 15 minutes to pick what he deemed was fit for the occasion.

- He was just about ready to step out the door with his books until his dormmate said something that caught his interest.

- "you're meeting up with your potions partner, arent you?"

- "Yeah, why?'

- "Nothing, it's just their a mudblood, you shouldn't be hanging around those types of people"

- "oh... I didn't know they were a... mudblood"

- 'yeah, nasty they are. you should just ditch 'em"

- So regulus did, he ditched you. he felt guilty, leaving you all alone in the library. you must had thought he was another pureblood prick.

- His conclusion was right, you waited for a good thirty minutes for him. When you realized he wasn't coming, you just decided to do the whole project yourself, it was better if you could just get this stupid assignment done yourself so you'd both could go your separate ways.

- The next day when he got to potions class, he saw you pass in a report to Professor Slughorn. He felt his stomach drop, he knew well enough you had finished the assignment last night without him.

- After class, he caught up with you, pulling you aside as he watched you stare up at him blankly.

- "what?" you had asked him, a hand on your hip as you gave an annoyed sigh.

- "I'm sorry I ditched you, I just didn't know you were a... muggle-born" he admitted, looking anywhere but your eyes as he caught a few of Slytherin boys looking at the two of you.

- "whatever, Black"

- " you didn't have to do the whole assignment, I would have helped you."

- Your eyes met the Slytherin boys who were watching you both, you gave a pitiful frown.

- " don't worry about it, I get it. next time, just tell the professor you don't want to work with me. don't lead me on for a stupid joke"

- He didn't get to explain himself as he watched you walk away, he felt horrible. he had never felt this deep connection to someone before, it made his heart sink when he watched you turn the corner.

- A few months pass, he hadn't gotten another opportunity to talk to you again. he felt like an idiot, he had a chance and he completely blew it,

- Late at night, regulus would stare at his ceiling and dream about what would happen if he had just done what he wanted if he had gone to finish the assignment with you. You both would meet up, exchange dislikes and likes, talk about your dreams for the future.

- He couldn't focus on quidditch, it was coming more frequent of his team captain yelling at him.

- Luckily, he had gotten another opportunity to talk to you again. both of you were selected to be a part of the slug club. Regulus was going to say no, but when he heard your name get mentioned, he joined.

- The first dinner party of slug club, was like a dream. his eyes scanned over your outfit and how it looked absolutely pleasing on your body. his eyes kept siding over to where you sat and when you caught him, he would just look away.

- After a few more meetings, he was done with the 'whole looking away whenever you looked at him' ,  there were only a few more months of Hogwarts left. his eyes met yours and he didn't look away, he gave a smile.

- When you had smiled back, he couldn't help but smile a bit wider, his cheeks glowing with a red flame.

- The next meeting, you had sat next to him. it didn't take long until you both had been exchanging words and stories, laughing at jokes and giving each other shy looks.

- After a dinner meeting during slug club, Regulus offered to walk you back to your house common room. (if you are in Slytherin, then he would just walk with you till you both had to go separate ways to your dorm).

- Once you arrived at your destination, it was awkward. He looked anywhere but you, his face was hot with red as he began to get flustered.

- You had said a quiet goodbye, turning to head back to your dorm but he grabbed your hand. Holding you back as he stiffened up and asked you out.

- "will you go out with me? This weekend, it's a Hogsmeade trip, I'll pay." His words were hard, but his body language was a complete mess.

- "you're not gonna ditch me again are you?"

- "no, defiantly not ." His words had still been raw and hard, he felt like he was going to throw up butterflies.

- "I'm a muggle-born, I heard you purebloods don't really like us very much. This kind of seems like a set-up"

- God you hoped it wasn't a set-up, ever since you've sat next to regulus at the slug club meetings, he had stolen your heart.

- "It might become an issue for some... people, but it doesn't bother me much"

- Regulus was defiantly not good at phrasing things, especially romantic feelings.

- You didn't take his words too seriously, you debated for a minute. You wanted to go with him, it felt like every nerve was alive.

- "Alright, one date couldn't hurt" with your words, you leaned up to kiss his cheek.

- "goodnight Regulus" ... and then you had disappointed out of his view. Once you reached your dorm, you screamed into your pillow with excitement.

- The date went well, you both had gone to the three broomsticks sticks and sat at a table near the very back.

- You had talked about everything you could, Though he made sure to stay away from the conversation of his family. He didn't want to ruin the date by mentioning his pureblood supremacist family. It's sorta a mood killer.

- You both stayed out of busy spots, even hiding and giggling in a bush as his dorm mates passed.

- That was your first kiss with regulus, tangled in bushes and twigs as you heard footsteps fading. His lips were soft, his hand coming to rest on your cheek.

- When you pulled away, both of you were flushed and looking towards the soil. He walked you back to Hogwarts, separating ways.

- You both couldn't see each other often, only giving each other looks in class or exchanging waves when passing each other in the hallways.

- It was fine for a few months, though the secret meetings were stressful yet fun. You didn't want to hide anymore, which resulted in your first fight.

- "don't you get it? I can't be seen with you! I've told you about my family. They don't like muggle-borns, this Voldemort guy doesn't either and I can't risk exposing our relationship! You'll get hurt!"

- "I don't care if I get hurt Regulus! Our love shouldn't be hidden because your afraid of what people will think! I'm tired of this sneaking around, I'm sick of it!"

- The fighting continued for minutes, both exchanging hateful words. At one point he had said something very vial, saying he couldn't be seen with someone like yourself.

- "What is that suppose to mean?" You sneered at him, eyes tearing up as your arms crossed over your chest.

- "you know damn well what it means," he said back, quick and hard as he just glared down at you.

- You huffed, turning away as you wiped at your cheek. You turned back, shaking your head at him before disappearing out of the room.

- He stayed in the room for a while, thinking about everything. He was so angry, his veins were about to pop from frustration. He hated his family, he couldn't believe that he would lose the one he loved because of his ratchet mother and father.

- He went to Sirius, which was a first in forever. He explained everything to him, he told him how he was sneaking around with a muggle-born and how he didn't want to stop loving you.

- Sirius smirked, thinking he had finally gotten Regulus to betray their spoiled family. Sirius talked his ear off, telling him that he was glad he was gonna change himself and come join the hated family member club.

- Regulus didn't just want to leave the family, he wanted revenge.

- He disregarded Sirius, telling him to piss off and leave him alone for a while.

- The end of 6th year was coming up and Regulus wasn't given any chance to speak to you. He knew damn well you both hadn't separated, just fought. Though he laid in bed at night and worried so hard he thought his brain was gonna rot.

- On the train, he made sure to pull you into a compartment with just you and him. Shutting the blinds so no one will disturb you both.

- "Regulus I don't want to talk to you"

- "I can't meet with you or write to you all summer, I'm not putting up with this break anymore. I only have 2 hours with you and I'm not wasting it."

- "aren't you afraid you're gonna be spotted with me?" ... Regulus wasn't quite good at sarcasm (HA! As if) but he knew well enough from the tone of your voice that you weren't too happy.

- Regulus sighed hard, watching you look out the window as you played with the bottom of your shirt; tucking it in and out of your skirt/trousers (or whatever you're comfortable in).

- "I'm going to do something crazy over the summer break and I don't know if it's going to work but all I know is if I can protect you, I will."

- "regulus what are you talking about?" You asked, you felt worry build up in your stomach. You reached out, grabbing his hand.

- He instantly interlocked your fingers together, he moved to your side as he stared deep into your eyes. His eyes always looked so cold, but right now in this moment, they felt warm.

- "I love you, honestly, if I could marry you right now I would"

- He denied to speak about what he said before, he didn't give you any more information.

- Halfway through the ride, you had been positioned on his lap. His arms looped around your waist as his head rested in the crook of your neck. He let you play with his hands.

- " I love you too" you mumbled in the quiet atmosphere. Regulus held you tighter at the words.

- "hmm?" He hummed, wanting you to say those words again.

- " you told me you loved me, I didn't say it back. But I do love you regulus, I love all of you."

- Regulus felt himself smiling, he couldn't stop the wide grin as he nudged his head into yours lovingly.

- "I can't wait to see you after the summer break" you whispered to him, kissing his forehead as you felt the train start to slow down.

- Dread filled the empty spaces as you hugged each other as tight as possible, not wanting to let go.

- "it's alright, I'll see you after summer. I promise" he whispered into your ear, before bringing your lips to his and kissing one last time.

- The kiss felt like fireworks, there was so much longing and passion mixed into it you didn't want it to end.

- Sadly, the kiss ended and regulus soon disappeared in the crowd of people.

- That summer, regulus had gotten the death mark, he reeked of anger and emptiness. All he wanted was to see you again, to hold you in his arms and kiss you until you both couldn't breathe.

- He had gotten close to Voldemort, he played all the deatheaters with his fake words and praises. He had learned about Voldemort's Horcruxes.

- Regulus had sat at dinner, fork pressed into his hand as he thought hard. His love for you was so strong, he would kill for it.

- He counted down the days until summer break would end.

- 2 more weeks.... 13 days... 11 days... 8 days...

- On the 7th day before September 1st, his plan came to action. He would destroy Voldemort's Horcrux and defeat him and after, he would live 7th year in peace.

- Though his plans didn't come to a win. It stormed and rages of rain came upon him as he made his way to the cave. All he could hear was his heartbeat and the sound of rain outside, along with the padding of Kreacher feet.

- He could hear his breath, his eyes casting over every edge and dark spot. He smiled, he was going to do it, he was going to defeat Voldemort.

- "Whatever I say Kreacher, don't listen. Just keep feeding me the water"

- Kreacher grumbled, "of course, sir"

- "for you love, all for you" regulus whispered before dipping the shell into the crevasse, bringing it to his lips as he took a sip.

- Drinking the liquid felt like poison, regulus had to fight himself to not throw it up.

- The liquid was almost gone, but Kreacher had to take regulus place and force-feed him. Regulus was begging and thrashing, saying whatever came to mind.

- Regulus couldn't finish the drink, weird slimy skeletons climbed from the water surrounding them. Regulus was in a horrid state he couldn't even tell.

- When Kreacher finally force-feed him the last of it, regulus mind came to stillness. His limbs too weak, but he was able to understand that the weird-looking skeletons were not friends.

- "Kreacher, take the Horcrux and go! Hide it! Try anything to destroy it! Go!" He had yelled out, voice dry and strangled.

- Kreacher had to obey by request, he snapped his fingers and disappeared with the Horcrux.

- Regulus tried to fight, his wand shook in his hand as he casts spells after spells. It worked for a few minutes, but there was only one of him and so many of them.

- Regulus was pulled into the water, he kicked and thrashed in spite of trying to get loose. He couldn't swim even if he escaped, his eyes stared through the muddy water as his lungs filled with it.

- Regulus thought of you, your smile, the first time you kissed him, the way your hand fit in his so perfectly, the way you would send him kind eyes whenever he passed you in the halls.

- He sank, and of course his body was dead, but his mind was still there. He was barely conscious enough, but he was there. His body limp and rotten as the years pass.

- His disappearance travelled fast, you had heard first on the train.

- The first years had wondered why a a 7th year was weeping so bad that they couldn't even stand properly.

- You shook hard, gasping and not even trying to grab anything as you sank to the floor of the train. You couldn't care that people were giving you looks, your boyfriend was gone.

- Regulus was gone.

[a-lil-perspective]

I love, love, LOVE your stories about Cross’buir. I love watching Cross grow into himself as a parent and just accepting that role. Hands down my favorite scenes are with him and his pregnant wife. It’s a very delicate and emotional time for them and the stories are SO sweet, always kind of bittersweet, and romantic, and just full of undying support two people have for each other despite all they’ve been through. It’s very mature in that way. I can never get enough. What you’ve got is special.

It’s very important to me and I can’t really explain why I’m so invested. Personally I love how different their relationship is to Hunter and Cyare’s; it’s like night and day. It definitely feels more intimate, it definitely has more mature themes (it’s kind of more heartbreaking). I can’t really write “stories” - these days I don’t even consider myself a “writer.” But there are these scenes, in my head, for Crosshair and his wife specifically, that are condensed and meant to convey a very specific emotion, and I try to capture that as best as I can. For me it’s all about centering around this one particular point or feeling and pouring my heart into it. Sometimes, a lot of times, it doesn’t always flesh out, but I’m happy it is well-received. I can’t quite fathom it, to be honest.

I think it’s important for me, when I’m considering Crosshair in his parental role and just Crosshair by himself, that I showcase him in such a way that centers around a very inward, personal reflection, and lesson, in that he should never be afraid of who he is. Who he could be, outside of what he was created for.

((Disclaimer: This is not me saying I believe the only option for Clones outside of soldiering is fatherhood and domesticity. Not at all. I’m simply stating this in accordance with the plot I have created personally that is localized to one particular character.))

I feel like we all go through points in time where we have to accept roles we aren’t truly comfortable with, ones where we feel ill-equipped, and we have to learn to adapt and navigate them to the best of our abilities. That’s the burden of responsibility, and maturity. It’s not so much you view it in a negative light, it’s that you do the best you can with it and find the takeaway. And you grow. And you be better. I think that’s what I’ve tried to convey in Crosshair. He has this dangerously stubborn and defiant streak where he bucks at the first sign of responsibility and what he deems to be an inconvenience, something that threatens his contingency, and it gets him in trouble. He’s a superior soldier but he’s full of self-doubt. He inherently vilifies himself and that bleeds into everything he does outside of soldiering, and I personally can relate to that.

So this bleeds into his role of fatherhood; it’s the single, scariest obstacle in his life because of who he paints himself out to be; the relationships he strains because of it. He offers this rubric of dissent and tells everyone to take it or leave it. Until he’s brought back to reality - humility - in a very harsh but necessary way.

And so anyway, he and his wife’s relationship is a long, hard road. They’re together an upwards of ten years before Asher comes into the picture. They’ve had a lot of time to get their shit together, to fall apart, to regress, to grow. As a result they’ve built up a unique support for each other over the years. The pregnancy brings out a very raw, vulnerable side of Crosshair that maybe needed to come out, and maybe never would have otherwise. ((Again, not saying fatherhood/parenting is the only or even primary form of self-growth.))

So I’m rambling here as per usual but my point to all this nonsense is, I appreciate messages like this. I so appreciate it. Makes me feel like my brain is not all rotten and bad.