#to fucking important ass terrifyingly smart people

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

sorry for diary posting so much on main but this is the last one today prommy

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas - UA High School Host Club

In honour of Ouran’s second season after an eon of nothing, I present to you: a BNHA Ouran AU. Girls and boys in this club because it was more fun that way, not really a focus on romance, more an unending comedy of teenagers being stupid and having fun. 

Tamaki - Shouto

Here Shouto, while being the third son, is his father’s chosen heir to their private security company. Shouto’s rebellion was to be extra and flamboyant, casting off his father’s insistence that he be the perfect son. He’s very much gay but he plays any part for the host club - leaning into his sexuality rather than out of it is party a - rather successful - attempt to piss off his father.

He’s far more socialized than his canon counterpart, and while his father is still a dick he's more distant with impossibly high expectations with a nice dash of emotional abuse.

Second Year

 Kyoya - Momo

Momo is the youngest child of three in her family, always told she didn’t need to be smart because her destiny was to be married to a rich man and make her family proud. Shouto told her that was stupid and that she had better business sense than anyone he’d ever met and that he’d offer her a place at his company if he didn’t think she’d do better running her own. They run the host club together for fun, and for a way for Momo to flex her business muscle.

Second Year

 Huni - Ochako

She’s rich because she deserves it, only child and heiress to a very successful construction company. Don’t let her cute looks fool you, she's been hanging with tradies her whole life and she can swear like a sailor and benchpress the whole club. Her family has close ties to Tenya’s and he’s basically been her bodyguard their whole life - less because she's incapable, more because she looks cute and Tenya has always been built like a tank. 

Third Year, but she looks like a middle schooler 

 Mori - Tenya

Loves his older brother, second son of a massive transport company. His family quietly really wants him to marry Ochako, less because its good business (even though it is) and more because she's the only person who has ever been able to make him loosen up. He’s built like a quarterback and no one understands why. Star of the track team, joined the host club because Ochako did and realised it was kinda fun. He’s very propper which a lot of people find cute!

Third Year, built like a 28-year-old with a bit of a babyface. 

 Twins - Kirishima and Bakugo (doing a bromance thing)

Kirishima

His parents are from old money (Yakuza. They are Yakuza) and think he’s the cutest thing ever. He joined because he was friends with Shouto and Shouto promised it’d be a riot. It has been. Also might be using the fact its a school club to use school money to buy fancy food and fun costumes but that's not the point! 

First Year

Bakugo

His dad is a fashion designer and his mum is a model. He’s done a bit of both already and his looks make him popular but likes design way better. Pretends he hates the host club but secretly thrives off validation from others.

First Year

 Haruhi -Izuku 

Gives very few fucks about gender, most of his clothes are hand-me-downs so a lot of them are from female cousins and friends of his dad. Can’t be fussed cutting his hair so he lets it grow long so he gets mistaken for a girl a lot. Is he nonbinary? Probably! He hasn’t worked that out yet though, but he likes girls and boy’s clothes well enough and he doesn’t care what gender he gets called. 

Gifted in school but bullied pretty bad in middle school, he went for a scholarship to a fancy private school and got in on flying colours. The bullying isn’t nearly as bad as it was in middle school because the school is paid enough to actually care about its students. Still, entrance exams were expensive and he doesn’t have enough money yet to buy a uniform. Surely That Won't CauSe Any ProBlems.

His dad is Yagi Toshinori, an old police officer. His wife Inko passed away and he was horribly injured in a car accident. He had to take a long time off work to recover physically and emotionally and while money was tight before it got really tight when he wasn’t after his life passed. People say he should have just dumped Izuku because he wasn’t his biological son and he got terrifyingly angry so no one said that ever again. He can still kick your ass even if he’s skinny. He will kick your ass for the sake of his son.

  Not super important, but Hatsume is Renge and Shinsou is Kasanoda! Everyone is stupid and loves Izuku, Shouto is melodramatic, Touya snaps at one point and maybe tries to kill Izuku - you know! The usual!

[chamerionwrites]

📕 hit me up please!

After that Extremely Cheerful fic premise featuring Draven, please enjoy this palate cleanser also featuring Draven (and more importantly Jyn):

I’ve touched on this briefly before (Ahsoka + Maul remains one of the sole redeeming qualities of TCW), but imho one of the greatest writing joys is cramming unexpected/markedly different/directly-at-odds-with-each-other characters into tight proximity and extreme circumstances and watching the characterization sparks fly. I love, love, love exploring what kind of dynamic develops when people who would not normally interact that often or that intimately are forced to rely on each other for survival and/or success in some very important goal.

I think this should happen to Jyn and Draven.

In the Rogue One Lives AU these two have the makings of a fascinatingly uncomfortable character dynamic. They have Galen but also Cassian between them. They’re personally at odds but fighting on the same side of a war. (Or rather, Jyn is personally antagonistic and has every right to be. I don’t think Draven actually harbors any personal antagonism for Jyn at all; the abrasiveness in the film strikes me as obligatory spymaster suspicion + being a bit of a dick on purpose to see what sort of information and/or reaction it might shake loose, which tbf is also Cassian’s interrogation tactic in that scene.) Both of them have a strong pragmatic streak and while the world's biggest elephant is always going to crowd the room, I think both could agree wholeheartedly on a limited set of principles including “not dying,” “ruining the Empire’s day,” and/or “Cassian Andor’s well-being.”

IRL this would be actively excruciating and probably traumatic to deal with but in fiction it’s fun to read about, because that kind of impossible-to-resolve tension draws interesting things out of characters.

Also…….listen. Sometimes (often!) I want haunting explorations of the cost of violence on the human soul but sometimes. sometimes. I want my faves kicking ass and taking names. Sometimes I am a woman of simple tastes, a good action scene is one of them, and I find the idea of Jyn “canonically twelve ounces of whoop-ass” Erso and Davits “canonically down for a bit of good old-fashioned murder” Draven teaming up against Imperials darkly hilarious. The former is one of Saw Gerrera’s best soldiers according to Saw Gerrera, and the latter exudes a strong aura of “probably saw some shit in the early days when the Rebel Alliance was approximately twelve people held together with spit and duct tape, lived to tell about it, and believes fervently that ‘fighting dirty’ is a synonym for ‘fighting smart.’” THE CHAOS THEY WOULD UNLEASH LMAO.

Do they get cut off in an ice tunnel together while retreating from Hoth and have to fight their way out? Do they join forces to rescue Cassian from an intelligence operation that went tits-up? I don’t care! I do not actually want them to reach a neat and tidy understanding because, as noted, I think Jyn deserves to hold that grudge and in any case a bit of foxhole camaraderie is not enough to fix a conflict of that magnitude. I simply want them to collaborate in spectacularly ruining the Empire’s day while exhibiting emotionally strained but terrifyingly competent teamwork, because sometimes what the id wants is Pretty Explosions with a side of character development. Also I think that at the very least Jyn deserves the opportunity to say “Hey asshole. Watch my back. Don’t fuck it up,” while Draven very dryly replies "Duly noted" because (1) too many people are shooting at them to argue and (2) he knows he deserves it. And because (3) I, personally, am entertained by this precise flavor of battlefield snark.

I am not writing this, because frankly what I really want to do is read this, but possibly someday I will try my hand.

[rosethornewrites]

Fic: The Rebellion of Adrien Agreste ch. 1-2

Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth, Juleka Couffaine/Rose Lavillant, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Luka Couffaine, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug & Kagami Tsurugi, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Luka Couffaine, Lila Rossi/karma, Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth/aneurism, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug/Kagami Tsurugi, Plagg & Tikki

Characters: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir, Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth, Lila Rossi, Jagged Stone, Plagg, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Luka Couffaine, Penny Rolling, Anarka Couffaine, Rose Lavillant, Juleka Couffaine, Kagami Tsurugi, Alya Césaire, Chloé Bourgeois, Wayhem, Nadja Chamack, Nathalie Sancoeur, Sabine Cheng, Tom Dupain, Tikki, Fang, Principal Damocles, Caline Bustier, Ms. Mendeleiev, original minor character, Alec Cataldi, Lila Rossi's Mother, Sabrina Raincomprix, Roger Raincomprix, Mylène Haprèle, Le Gorille | Adrien Agreste's Bodyguard, Nino Lahiffe, Nooroo

Tags: Lila Rossi salt, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Teenage Rebellion, Swearing, Bad Parent Gabriel Agreste, Crack Treated Seriously, Lila Rossi's Lies Are Exposed, Cuddling & Snuggling, Luka Couffaine Needs a Hug, Paparazzi, Parentification, Marinette Dupain-Cheng Needs a Hug, Gabriel Agreste Needs an Aneurism, Uncle Jagged Stone, we're all queer here, the spirit of punk is sometimes just being allowed to be yourself, Kagami Finds Her Groove, punk rock fashion, Savage Kagami, Marinette protection squad, Good Parent Sabine Cheng, Good Parent Tom Dupain, Protective Kagami Tsurugi, Protective Luka Couffaine, Bisexual Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Pansexual Luka Couffaine, Sharing a Bed, Pet Names, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, Instagram, Bullying, Social Media, Anxiety, Makeover, Hugs, will cure your acne, Face Punching, Bad Ass Juleka Couffaine, Rumors, Protective Juleka Couffaine, Protective Adrien Agreste, Lawyers, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Holding Hands, accountability, mental health, Jagged Stone's well-paid pet shark, How to Make the Evening News, Sexy eyeliner for days, one fish two fish Lila is a screwed fish, How to have fun and piss Gabriel off, Fuckery, sweet litigious karma, Alya sugar, lawyer shark doo doo doo doo doo doo, Schadenfreude, Bad Ass Alya Césaire, Gaslighting, abuse denormalization, Jagged likes his lawyers like he likes his pets: toothy af, Blood in the Water, Everything you didn’t know you wanted and some things you did, Gabriel Agreste is shark bait, Denial, Consequences, Principal Damocles salt, caline bustier salt, the impotence of Gabriel Agreste, snarky Nooroo, lies and the lying liars who tell them, Lila's brain is a narcissistic hellscape, Lila’s mind is built like an Escher piece, Alec Cataldi salt, Adrien Sugar, wholesome salt, Fu Salt, Kwami Shenanigans, Nooroo is a little shit

Summary: Gabriel decides that Adrien entering a romantic relationship is a good move for the brand. He chooses Lila Rossi as the other half. Adrien nopes tf out.

Notes: I was gonna have it be a slow acceleration, but Adrien was all “Go big or go home.” Also trying to find motivation to write more of this fic.

AO3 link

----------

“No,” Adrien growled. “Absolutely not!”

Lila made a show of crying, not that anyone in the room believed her tears were real.

Gabriel frowned at him from his desk. “This will be good for the brand—”

“Fuck the brand!”

“Adrien! This is unbecoming. You will be seen to be dating Ms. Rossi. That is final.”

Adrien’s fists were so tight he was sure he had crescents eating into his palms. “Like hell it is! I will not date that—” he gestured at Lila “—lying cow. Not after how she’s hurt my friends.”

Said girl gasped, outraged, and Adrien was glad to see she actually looked truly upset.

His father stood, but kept his voice emotionless, calm, self-assured that he would capitulate. “Cease this ridiculous teenage rebellion.”

He saw red, but oddly it calmed him. “Father, you have not seen teenage rebellion,” he said, his voice almost terrifyingly calm. “But I would be happy to teach you what it looks like if you try to force me to do this.”

Gabriel’s eyes narrowed behind his glasses. Adrien could see him considering that, but then discarding it. “It will be in the papers tomorrow. If you misbehave, you’ll no longer be permitted to go to school.”

Adrien snorted. He knew more ways to escape this house than his father could possibly anticipate—some he’d made himself, even. “Good luck, Gabe. You’re going to need it.”

He spun on his heel before his father could respond and slammed the door behind him. With the enhanced strength he had as the Black Cat Miraculous chosen, the wood cracked audibly.

As he made his way back to his room, he realized the opportunity his father had just placed in his lap. As the face of the brand, Adrien had more power than Gabriel seemed to realize. It was time to stretch those muscles.

He had planning to do.

---------

His father had spectacularly good timing for pulling this kind of stunt—for Adrien, anyway. He’d heard from a couple of friends of his that a certain rock star was in town. And if anyone was up for promoting teenage rebellion, Adrien had no doubt it would be Jagged Stone.

It was child’s play to sneak out of the house. He didn’t even have to transform to do it. From there it was just making his way to the Grand Paris Hotel. The staff assumed he was there to see Chloé, so getting in was no problem. Jagged Stone always rented the same suite, so that wasn’t an issue, either.

The hard part, he knew, would come after he knocked on the door.

Jagged opened the door, and then peered at him suspiciously.

“Um, M. Stone, I don’t know if you remember me but—”

The rock star suddenly broke into a wide grin. “Oh, you’re Marinette’s model friend, right?”

Adrien blinked. Maybe this wouldn’t be so hard. His rock idol knew him?

Sadly, he had no time to fanboy.

“Yes, Adrien. I was wondering if I could trouble you for some help?”

And so that was how Adrien Agreste wound up sitting in Jagged Stone’s suite, petting Fang, and telling him about the woe that was the obsession his father had with Lila Rossi, Liar Extraordinaire.

“She said I had a what?”

“A kitten. And she got Marinette expelled and is just being really awful to her.”

Jagged opened a cell phone. “Penny, I need you. Yes, I know I sent you for macrons, but this is really important. Bring my niece with.”

When he was finished, he turned to Adrien again. “We’ll get that taken care of.”

“That’s not all, M. Stone.”

He pressed forward, telling his idol of the relationship he was being forced into and his promise to show Gabriel Agreste just what he could do if he really rebelled.

When he was done, Jagged’s face was gleeful in an almost terrifying way.

“Oh, please tell me I get to help with this?” At Adrien’s nod the man whooped in excitement. “Brilliant. Once my niece gets here, we’ll plan properly. She’s a planner, that one. Smart as a whip.”

Adrien blinked. “Your niece?”

“Marinette, of course! Honorary niece.”

His jaw dropped. Marinette had always had the upper hand on Lila, could call in Jagged at any moment to destroy her, and had held back. He never should’ve stopped her.

“My father can’t know she helped. He’s got so much power in the fashion industry, and I don’t want to hurt her career.”

Jagged waved away his concerns. “Mate, listen. From what I understand you’re the face of that company. You have the power, not him. Get you in some Marinette originals, and he can’t undo the fame that’ll bring her.”

Adrien hadn’t considered that. “I just don’t want her hurt.”

He heard the door open, and then a soft, “Adrien?”

It meant he had to explain the situation all over again, letting Jagged Stone assure her that he was going to pop the liar’s kitten whopper as soon as possible.

“I can stop by your school with Fang, yeah? They can’t keep me from saying hi to my favorite niece.”

Marinette bit her lip. “That would be helpful, but for Adrien…”

Adrien smiled. “I want you to design me a new look. Something we can do here and now—maybe with the discrete help of some of the hotel staff, since they have that nice spa and such. Hair dye, new clothes. Maybe some fake piercings. Oooh, a fake tattoo?”

Jagged glanced at Penny, who looked uncertain about this. “Don’t be a party pooper, Penny.”

“His father might sue you,” she pointed out.

“Like I care. I have money.” He grinned. “And for what? Giving his kid a makeover?”

“French law—”

“Nope, don’t care. It’s happening. Get his sizes and go to my favorite stores. Adrien, what color scheme?”

Adrien blinked. He hadn’t thought that far. He glanced at Marinette. “Um, do you think Chat Noir would mind if I used his colors? I think of him when I think teenage rebellion.”

That was more because being Chat Noir had up to this point been his way of rebelling, but she didn’t need to know that.

To his surprise, Marinette grinned, the smile wide enough to match Jagged’s. “Oh, I like that idea. Chains and spikes? Fake lip ring and septum?”

“Absolutely!”

Jagged made a shooing motion at Penny, who rolled her eyes and headed toward the door, before joining in. “Now how about this idea: black and neon green hair, done to look like a skunk’s stripes!”

Adrien was surprised to find himself laughing honestly at the idea. He’d been so angry less than an hour ago, but this was truly fun. “This makes me think of those J-Rock bands, how they used to dress up.”

Jagged’s phone let out a guitar riff and he glanced at it. “Oh, right. Penny needs your measurements. Shoe size, too. Definitely some stomping boots, I think.”

He handed over his unlocked phone for Adrien to text.

“I’ll call the salon, yeah?”

Adrien nodded, texting the information, then froze. “Wait, Chloé might tell my father.”

That got a laugh. “Nah. They’re discrete. They bring everything up here for me—I won’t be around people if I’m getting my hair dyed.”

While Jagged made the call, Adrien finished the text. When he looked up, Marinette was watching him. She turned pink when she realized he’d caught her.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” she asked after a moment.

He sighed, slumping back on the sofa and resting his hand on Fang’s head again. “No, but I don’t have any better ones. That stupid news claiming I’m with Lila’s going to hit tomorrow. And I’m so done with this, with him treating me like I’m property.”

Marinette looked worried, and he tried to muster up a smile. From her expression, he didn’t manage it.

“Maybe…” she started, then trailed off.

“Maybe?”

She didn’t look at him. “Maybe you should look into laws involving child labor and parental responsibility. You… you might be able to get emancipated.”

That startled him—something he hadn’t even thought of before. He hadn’t even been aware it was an option.

When Marinette did look at him, her eyes were stormy. “He’s so… cruel to you. Maybe there’s legal recourse.”

“I’ll think about it,” he murmured. That seemed like such a drastic measure. “I don’t know if I want to go that far.”

She nodded, and he excused himself to go to the bathroom.

Plagg shot out of his pocket the moment the door was closed. “I’m so proud of you kid. This is gonna be great!”

“Thanks, Plagg.”

The kwami grabbed the proffered wedge of camembert.

“And think about what Pigtails said. Your dad’s a real piece of work, and you deserve better.”

“I will.”

Adrien could feel the idea turning over in his mind, as though gathering strength. When he left the bathroom, Jagged met him excitedly.

“I have just the idea! A temporary face tattoo!”

[bormst]

cape god - allie x

album review

being young has its ups and downs. on one hand, the real pressures of life have not presented themselves quite yet. you are expected to be simply enjoy living and being a kid before true the hardship (ironically put considering the subject matter of this album) and horrors of being a human step into the light, as they inevitably do. On the other, they are the most confusing years we navigate. Identity, emotions, puberty, what it takes to find and hold onto one’s own sense of self. This often easier said than done. We experiment, sex, drugs, rock and roll (fuck yea) and do what it takes for not only others to like who we present ourselves to be, but for us to like ourselves as well. speaking from experience, as well as the shared experiences of many, the ages of 16-25 are an entirely much too confusing whirl. the soul searching cuts deep, whether we are aware of it or not, for better or for worse. this is incredibly evident in the mystery-shrouded land of cape god. 

the second, full length studio album, cape god, from canadian songstress allie x (alexandra hughes) is a wildly original and both beautiful and terrifyingly all too real account of a mix of self-preservation AND self-exploration, that takes place within liminal space (named by allie as cape god). Released under twin music, hughes’ label that she holds most of her career under, this record is a 12 track account of the young human and fairly self-reflective experience(s). according to allie x, this is her most personal and proud body of work yet, and boy does it show. NOT to say this record is superior to her other releases (her debut ep collxtion I from 2015 is a pop masterpiece, sorry i am letting my stan show), but this is a standout work among hughes’ discography not only in the sense that she embraces a slightly new (for her, which is still debatable) and highly conceptualized sound of alternative dark-pop, but her ability to tell a story that doesn’t feel superficial or simply trying to appease the commercial world of top 40 radio, cookie cutter pop. it shows now her ability to come and go from cape god as necessary, being more comfortable with who she ism enough to release an entire work based on this confusing time-chunk in her life.

i’ve got to say, one of my favorite cuts from this record is the opening track, fresh laundry. produced by oscar görres and james ghaleb, allie sings of nostalgia and a sense of longing for a time that no longer exists via the scent of freshly cleaned laundry, over rhythmic and crow-calling synths. when this initially was released as the first promotional single for cape god, it took me a while to accept the sudden change in sound and aesthetic choice by allie towards a grungier and more alternative vision. but one day, it clicked. and i was hooked. it makes so much sense for her, looking back at her previous works, her post-ceding (not a word, now it is) ep titled super sunset is unrecognizable in a sense (still very good, check that one out too), and almost feels as though something was holding allie x back from who she wanted to be. and damn i am so happy shes finding her niche. some other great cuts from this record are the (probably pop-iest cut) sarah come home, love me wrong (queer kids unite), featuring my boy troye sivan, and the AMAZING susie save your love, featuring the very talented mitski. also super duper party people is a banger (that bass line are you kidding me??). the tail end of this record really flaunts the emotion of miss x, and she does not hold back, as is hard to do in cape god i could only imagine. In life of the party, almost as a compliment to super duper party people, allie recounts of using substances to be herself around people who unfortunately are not her real friends, and use and abuse the f out of her, but she cannot bring herself to mind, because this attention gives her a purpose and sense of life, regardless of whether she knows it is truly wrong to accept the way she is being treated. while this track isn’t my favorite sonically, it is important. the repetition of the chorus meant to burn into the listeners ear, emphasizing the important to allie of feeling accepted by these equally hurt people projecting their insecurities on this girl who is still finding herself. (allie, i hope you don’t vibe with those people anymore :/ ). In madame x, i am taking a shot in the dark when i say i ~believe~ it is about drugs, and the comfort they bring, NOT the madonna album of the same title (hehe, a gorgeous track nonetheless). 

i think we all have our own cape god, somewhere in our brains, and this record is an interesting look into how one individual (miss allie x) is still dealing with and tweaking the psyche we control a meat suit with, in the dreamscape liminal world we all possess (at least, I know i do). This record is very smart. is it commercial? not in the slightest. but it is beautiful and raw and for me, does exactly what music is suppose to do, be that vessel. allie once said in a promotional video for this album that these this is the music she could never quite find the words for, AND IM SO HAPPY SHE DID. personal biases aside as an admitted allie x fan of a hot ass second, this is a crazy original work that scares, delights, and intrigues me. she also released some SICK visuals for this era, check it the fuck out, you will not be disappointed. 

cape god - allie x 4/5 stars

-bormst

[jakey-beefed-it]

D&D asks... 2 5 6 10 19 21 25 30 34 Sorry there are so many, I’m just just starved for D&D at the moment.

Well. Shit. If I can help even slightly, I will. o7

2. Your favorite character that someone else has played 

A good long while ago, back in 4th edition d&d, my friend Brian rolled up Sarin, a pretty kick-ass proper elf of the sort that you very rarely see people take on. He was an ‘eladrin’, basically 4e’s High Elf only if anything more so because they were literally from the feywild and had some innate magic beyond what you usually get as the standard sort of sylvan-themed ‘Elf’ race in d&d. 

Sarin was a fighter who used his innate magic (basically short-ranged teleportation) for excellent tactical advantage. He had a really cool backstory where he had fled the Winter Court of the fae for various reasons (mostly political) and had to make his way in the regular mundane world. Over the course of the seven or eight levels we played that game for, he slowly became less ‘cold’ (womp womp) and alien, forging friendships with his chosen band of motley mortals

Mostly calling him out specifically because of the really good job Brian did on characterizing him as a very different sort of being who through his friendships gradually learned to find a place in the mundane world. Anyone who knows Brian (his social awkwardness manifests as ‘aloofness’ to most people) knows this character was just... perfect for him.

5. Favorite NPC. 

I’ve been trying to avoid posting about anything from my current games in these posts because I don’t want to be seen like, taking sides/picking favorites and whatnot. But this category seems pretty safe, so I can go ahead and pick an NPC from the Goblin Squad game-

Sumi, the like nine year old Adventure Kid, daughter of a caravan owner (and his extremely cool barbarian wife) the group befriended. Sumi is bright, curious, mischievous, brave, and often hilarious. The whole group loves the shit out of that kid, even though she is often worryingly stabby. She’s gonna be a hell of an adventurer when she grows up. Smart money is on something vaguely rascally, rogue or bard, though she also shows lots of curiosity toward magic. 

6. Favorite death (monster, player character, NPC, etc). 

In a limited series Exalted game I ran over one summer between years of college, my friend Jon played a rogueish character named Davire who solved most problems through fast talking, and those he could not solve with talking he generally solved with knives thrown from a safe distance away. 

The time came to do a critical hand-off to an NPC villain; the party would hand over a terrifyingly powerful Artifact of Doom and in exchange the villain would return their loved one(s). Davire, the fast-talking oh-so-clever why-solve-a-problem-with-the-direct-approach-when-other-ways-are-more-fun guy, walked over with said artifact and killed the villain with it.

Not by activating it. It was a 30 pound or so hunk of metal (series of interlocking rings you could manipulate into various positions for effect) and he just... he just brained the dude with it. Effectively a crit, with complete surprise, and then burned lots of resources to ramp up the damage after the fact with a combination of magic he had devised (and spent xp to develop) like five sessions prior (of a ten session arc) because his plan all along was to take his ‘i never solve anything with violence that can be solved with conversation and certainly not at point blank range’ character and surprise the baddie by just fucking clocking him with the goddamn thing. That was his plan for the entire back half of the story.

There was, of course, a Bigger Bad, and he actually ended up giving his life most heroically to stop him Forever (actually using said ultra-powerful artifact at the cost of his own life) and that was seriously cool too but honestly when he just straight-up merc’d my underboss with Surprise Combo He’d Been Planning For Weeks I was fucking delighted. 

10. Your favorite enemy and the enemy you hate the most. 

@kingerblogs‘ goblins are literally always a goddamn hoot. Absolute favorites, even the ones who aren’t the Very Special goblin Boy who my barbarian effectively adopted (despite the fact that he is very likely a full-grown goblin), Skabb. 

I have a love/hate with mind flayers. Love because they’re great villains and full of potential horror both cosmic and just plain visceral, hate because augh they want to eat your brain!

19. Do you or your party have any dice superstitions? 

Can’t speak for others but oh dear god yes. It doesn’t really come up in d&d anymore given that I play online and we use bots to randomly generate a number in the correct range rather than physical dice. But I can definitely point to my Warhammer habits as an example- a die consistently rolls low? Put it in ‘time out’ and don’t roll it again that game. Putting your dice away or setting them out to be rolled before a game? Set them with the highest face up, to ‘train’ them that that is the desired roll. 

21. Have you ever regretted something your character has done? 

Oh sure, lots. The one that comes to mind right now though is the time when Altanin accidentally burned down half the city they were trying to save from a cult that wanted to burn it down.

So the cult had these barrels of fantasy napalm stored in strategic sites all over town, and we had found exactly one of said sites, and were fighting the resident cultists. One of them jumped down into a tunnel (they were using the sewers and such to move around unseen) to escape us, and Altanin (who was raging) had a fun thought- would it not be the height of irony if this guy got blown up by his own WMD? So Altanin hoisted the barrel above his head, and then hurled it down into the tunnel to fry the bastard. Full-on donkey kong style.

The guy burned to a crisp all right, but the fire did not stay contained to the little escape tunnel and instead spread to the rest of the warehouse we were in, and then a few other nearby buildings before we were able to slay the living flame elementals that were spreading the blaze. 

Thing is, the other cultists were stationed throughout the city, awaiting the signal to blow shit up. About half of them saw this fire, went ‘well, it’s early, it’s not time for the coordinated assault’ and held off. The other half went ‘oh shit we’re starting early?’ and blew up their fantasy napalm. 

So it could have been worse, in that if we hadn’t done anything they would’ve just set off coordinated detonations and burned the whole city down like an hour later. But yeah it was... not Altanin’s finest moment.

25. What have your players done that you never could have planned for? 

No examples are springing to mind so let me just say that sometimes it feels like half the shit my players do takes me by complete surprise. Often for the worse (why... why would you do that?), often for the better. 

30. Are your players diplomatic or murder hobos? 

My players tend to solve all manner of problems through cleverness or persuasiveness that I have planned as combat encounters. This delights me. 

34. Do you tend pick weapons/spells for being useful or for flavor?  

Flavor is slightly more important to me, but usually I can convince a DM (and as a DM, I am amenable to) that they’re not mutually exclusive and let me ‘re-flavor’ a spell or power or weapon or whatever to be both effective AND thematic to the character.

[caffeineivore]

Moar Spirits for Spirit

Prompt: M/N, Neck

**

At this hour of night, this section of Central Park is all but deserted, which serves the purposes of the two young men meeting there just fine. The older of the two unties the red bandanna around his head and stuffs it into a pocket before stepping out into the light-- the colour is too eye-catching, even at this hour of night, and likely to draw the attention of passersby or the odd passing cop. The star-shaped tattoo on his wrist is a little less noticeable. 

He doesn’t give the other boy much of a greeting beyond a fairly elaborate handshake-fist-bump combination, during which money changes hands, but sits down at the base of the a statue-- fairly new, some dude in a cape holding a sword atop a horse, lights up a cigarette as he counts the wadded-up cash. “That’s a little bit more than what I asked, Trey. Wanna tell me what’s up?”

Trey is perhaps all of fifteen, gangly but baby-faced, shuffling his feet in his battered red high-tops. “Well, I got together some extra. You know. Isn’t that good, Switch?”

The evasiveness of Trey’s body language and his non-answer to Switch’s question makes the older boy lean forward, all but trapping him against the statue’s concrete base. “Don’t tell me you’re trying to get up to some shit, now. I don’t think that’d be a smart idea.”

“I just-- I got a new caseworker. She actually cares. I’ve been going to school and I think I might be able to graduate. She’s even helping me get a part-time job.” Trey’s still too young to know not to babble out sensitive information when he’s nervous, and so he rambles, shrinking away from Switch’s thunderous expression. “I won’t snitch or nothing, I promise. She doesn’t know anything about any of that, and I’m not gonna tell her. I just think I should get out of this so that it won’t fuck up my chances.”

“And you think it’s that easy, huh?” 

The snick of a knife being drawn is all but silent, and yet to Trey, in this still and deadly-silent park, it’s loud as a gunshot, almost as loud as the pulse pounding in his throat. Switch-- short for Switchblade, his weapon of choice, so easily hidden, and yet, flicked open close enough to his face to nick the tip of his nose, so lethal, all the same. “We took care of you when your trickin’ mama couldn’t. And now you think an extra hundred dollars gets you a free pass? An out?” Switch’s face is close enough to Trey’s that flecks of saliva impact against Trey’s cheek with his words, but the boy is too terrified to be grossed out. “You seen what happens to snitches. I guess you about to see what happens to rats going green, too.”

Trey is too scared to do more than yelp and squeeze his eyes shut, but the slash of the knife never comes. He hears a rumble, feels the earth shake in its very foundations at his feet. Maybe this is what an earthquake feels like, or the Apocalypse. Suddenly he doesn’t feel the pressure of a body up in his face any more, and hears Switch screaming.

He opens his eyes, and sees his former fellow gang member airborne, hoisted up by the scruff of his neck like a kitten, arms and legs dangling helplessly. The man holding him immobile is tall and muscular, looking like something out of King Arthur or maybe the Vikings, and has the tip of a wicked-looking sword that makes Switch’s knife look like a toothpick in comparison held to Switch’s throat. Trey has no idea where his mysterious saviour had come from; certainly, he’d not heard anyone or anything approaching just a moment ago. The man turns his face towards Trey, eyes dark and flashing.

“Run, you dithering knave! What are you waiting for?”

Trey jerks into action and jumps to his feet, dashing for the nearest exit. He almost crashes into a woman walking into the park, but manages to avoid her at the last second with a hasty “’Scuse me, ma’am!”. Maybe his new caseworker would help him evade Switch and any of the others who would likely now try to beat his ass. Angela. He’d never met anyone like her before, capable of giving him reason to hope for the better. 

“You’re excused.” Linden knows terror when she sees it, and it’s all but radiating off the boy in waves. It doesn’t take much to ascertain, based on his speed and direction, that he must have come from that particular section of the park, and she quickens her footsteps. She’s not quite prepared, however, to see her noble, impetuous, good-hearted idiot of a knight holding a flailing young man aloft twenty feet in the air. 

“Drop him. Hard enough to immobilize him. Not hard enough to kill him.” 

Nathalán follows her directive, but at that distance, Switch is still immediately rendered unconscious by the drop. Linden kicks away the knife that falls from his hand hard enough that it splashes into the pond, then bends over him, critically. 

“He’ll live. Probably a bit of a concussion and definitely will be favouring his left leg, but he may make it another year. Unless his lifestyle gets the best of him.” She is no fool, and certainly the tattoos and colours are a dead giveaway of his affiliation and probable livelihood. “I suppose he was shaking down the other one who ran out like the hounds of hell were pursuing him?”

“The other one was trying to bow out. Abjure the group which he’d been part of. They’ve been gathering more often, of late, in the park late at night. Selling their bags of powder or pastiles.”

“Kid’s trying to jump out of a street gang,” Linden shakes her splendid, curly head. “He’s lucky to have escaped with his life.”

“Will they seek retribution, then?” Nathalán asks in his blunt, direct way. “He is but a child. Foolish, undoubtedly, but not worthy of the ills they would visit upon him.”

“He shouldn’t have gotten tangled up with the street life,” Linden murmurs. “But I suppose I can’t fault you for having sympathy for foolhardy lads with more bravado than sense.” Nimbly, she clambers up onto the statuary’s base, so that she can look him in the eye. “I daresay you saved his life just now.”

His hand, so rough and inexorable around Switch’s neck, is gentle as it traces her back, pausing over her shoulder-blades where her wings would be when she’s in her most primordial and deadly of forms. “Maybe I see something of myself in him-- a yearning to regain honour that’s been lost. A desire to be worthy, someday, of love and forgiveness.” He dips his head, and the lips that touch her temple are soft and not at all cold, for the moment. “I just thought-- he should get that chance. As I did.”

“You are shameless and incorrigible,” Linden tells him, unable to stop a wry laugh from bubbling up. “I’ll see what I can do, I suppose.”

“I shall keep watch from here, as usual. And let you know if there is news.”

**

Though he was certainly not opposed to being inundated by some very nice drugs, courtesy of the emergency room staff at the hospital, Switch didn’t enjoy being laid up, not one bit. No one believed him, of course, and part of him was afraid that maybe he really was losing it. Certainly there was no freaking way that he’d been plucked off the ground by some statue come to life like something out of a Harry Potter movie, then unceremoniously dropped like a used Kleenex. He’d been found the next morning by park maintenance and by all accounts was lucky to be alive-- between the concussion and the broken leg and the freezing temperatures. Of course the po-po’s had not bought the story of why he’d been there so late, and they’d busted him cold with Oxy’s and two dime-bags of blow. One of the narcos actually had the nerve to laugh at him. “Well, Switch, maybe you wouldn’t be imagining such things if you weren’t high all the time. Funny how these things happen only to people like you.”

He hated the fucking cops.

Of course, there’d be the whole parade of possession charges and court and probie. And then he’d get down to business. Trey, specifically, was at fault for the predicament that he’d found himself in at present, and therefore needed to face the consequences of his actions. He still had homeboys on the street who could take care of a miserable little prick as easy as one-two-three. Just as soon as he managed to get out of this godforsaken hospital, of course. When he was somewhere not handcuffed to a bed.

The TV is set to one of the cooking shows, probably the food network or something, and the hostess is a super hot lady with curly reddish-brown hair and fantastic boobs behind her cute little apron get-up, showing the audience how to make some type of fancy holiday roast thing. 

“The most important part of this is letting it rest. You don’t want to carve it right away, not while it’s still tense from the heat and stress of the cooking process.” The perky hostess explains as she pulls the steaming roast out of the oven with bright-green mitts. Switch barely pays attention to her long-winded explanation, but out of nowhere, the TV starts to flicker, then go to static. Yet, eerily, though the entire pretty suburban-kitchen background of the cooking show disappears into that black-and-white-snowfall-effect, the cooking lady remains, facing him head-on, brandishing a carving knife with casual, deadly expertise in one hand and a knife-honer in the other. She’s got great boobs and is all smiles, but Switch knows, just from the way she’s holding it, that she’s as deadly with a bladed weapon as he is. 

“Rest, now.” The lady’s voice is still sweet, terrifyingly so. “I’ll carve it when it’s ready. There will be enough for everyone, even those who want seconds.” Switch clutches at the sheets and attempts to scoot back, but his bum leg keeps him immobile, as do the handcuffs. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do now. You wouldn’t want to ruin things, would you?” For one electrifying, nightmarish moment, he could swear that the cooking lady’s eyes go red as blood on that television screen even as the ring of carbon steel echoes eerily in the room. Switch feels cold sweat beading on the back of his neck, and on his upper lip, goose-flesh breaking out over his arms. 

“Fuck all this.” Shakily, he hits the button to summon a nurse. “Get that asshole pig in here. I need to talk to him.”

[kewltie]

high-end escort!izuku au: where rising top hero ground zero seriously need a date to a super important mandatory gala and his idiotic friends bet that he can’t wrangle a date. while katsuki knows bullshit when he sees one he can’t help wanting to rise to it bc his agency is getting super annoyed that he keep bailing out of this function and to shut his so called friends so now he is stuck to find a date in 2 days. katsuki is GOOD but he’s not that good so he resorts to the discreet world of escort service and picked the most famous agency and asked for their number one. what he got was his former childhood friend who had spurned and hurt all grown up now and about to fucking rock his world. 

izuku 100000% never actually wanted or intended to be an escort. the sludge villain never happened so he’d never met all might and therefore never received OFA so he never got a chance to go to U.A and become the greatest hero that he is meant to be :((((. with his dream thwart izuku focuses on his study and kind of move listly through life with no goal bc if he can’t even become a hero what’s even the point. eventually during college days money became super tight and izuku doesn’t want to rely on his mother and make her carried the burden of it. so he started to pick up multiple jobs on the side along with his studies... and it get harder and harder to remain his grades so his education suffer and he’s kind of stuck bc if he give up on his job he has to worry about the cost of living and school but if he focus on just earning money then his of education suffer :((, the vicious circle of a poor college student. 

so on one of his more uh colorful jobs where he works as a server at a hostess club down in the night district of downtown and that’s where he meet all these women and learned all their tricks and trade just from watching them every night. there he sees how they convinced their clients to give up more and more money to the store and stay longer and it surprisingly isn’t them seducing their clients but knowing what to say and how to say in a way that appeal to their clients ego and personality. izuku may not be into it or understand it completely but he watches and learns bc though these women may not be working at a place that society deem as deplorble but they make do with what they have and they use it to the best of their ability and that izuku can understand and he admires them for it. 

one night while he’s working, there’s a v drunk customer who had mistaken izuku for one of the girls and izuku got severely hit on and groped but instead of punching the man izuku calmly removed the man’s hands from his ass and waist and says with a smile, “sir, i’m not a cheap thing that you can touch that easily. if you want me to service you why don’t you buy yourself and your group a drink?” and that’s how izuku got the man to shell out more money to store and so drunk that he can barely stand and totally forgot about izuku. he diffused the situation w/o making a huge deal out of it and that’s what bc he’d pay attention to his surrounding and adapt to the situation so it doesn’t escalate. 

during the entire scene, there’s this lady who has been sitting on the side (ladies customers are rare but not like deterred) but is there to scout host/hostess clubs around the area for her own escort agency and she saw how izuku managed to deal w/ the customer with just a few words and a smile and she wants him to work for her. she approachs him after work and offers him a deal and compensation plan that looks too good to be true if he come work for her and use what he learned in that club for her clients. izuku ofc doesn’t right away accept it bc it’s kinda suspicious but she told him to look her up and give her a chance. he ends up doing it and that’s how izuku fall into the escort profession. 

turns out not only did the skills he’d picked up at hotess club was extremely helpful to him in his new job but natural analyze skill with his clients is the core of his job bc then he learn swhat they like and become whatever they want. he is able to read the mood & body language of his clients and knows what to say and how to say it so they response positively toward him. 

like for example one of his regular clients is a hieress to a mass fortune and she’s beautiful and smart and highly skill in corporate trade so it’s a double edge sword bc she’s so talented and beautiful that men finds her intimidating and get scared of her. so she look for in izuku is a lover/friend who can she can lean on: letting her rant about her job & frustration, offer her emotional comfort, cuddles with her from time to time, and treat her like every other girl, like she MATTERS and izuku delivers it in spade. he would bring her her fav food & flowers whenever he meet her, they have sleepover where he would paint her nails as she vent to him about her job and the ppl she work with, and he takes on date where they go to hole in the wall small family run resturants that she’d never went and nobody else even consider she would go bc well she’s an ELITE so ofc she wouldn’t be caught dead there but SHE LOVES IT. like these things he do to consider his client personality and their life choices is v v v important to his job bc he’s constantly adapting and changing to meet their needs.

what work for one doesn’t always work for other bc he also have an older male client who is divorced and lonely bc all his kids are grown up now so he’s looking for a companion, someone that make him feel needed and useful. so izuku acts spoiled and demanding, wanting the man to buy him stuff that he doesn’t actually need and requesting to meet him when the man is supposed to be in a meeting or throw a tantrum when the man cancelled a plan and it’s seem dumb and innocous but the client ABSOLUTELY LOVES IT bc it’s exactly what he wants to have someone rely on him and make him feel importat like they need him for his money and position even though it’s shallow but he wants that and izuku is there to give it to him. so maybe at first izuku felt super guilty that he’s lying or faking it for the money but the more he’s in this job he realize it’s just playing the part of their boyfriend, lover, friend, etc he’s selling an idea and the idealized version of what they want so he’s doing it for them as much as it is for himself... or so he thinks. 

but first and foremost izuku ISN’T PAID TO have sex with his client. he’s paid to be their perfect fantasy boyfriend/lover etc but if he does have sex with client it’s bc he genuine likes them and wants it for himself. but ofc ppl will misconstrued his job as soon as he say escort and think prostitution instead and though that may be true in other cases where the business can get sleazy and $ in exchanged for sex but not izuku and his agency. over the years of working at this job izuku climbs all the way to number one and is highly requested bc he’s so terrifyingly good at his job and is able to become the perfect bf/companion/lover you need just by understand and breaking down his client char, personality, and desires. 

so this is where katsuki comes in years later when izuku is already firmly established in the business and is damn ass good at his job. their relationship splintered during middle school years and they’d never recover and so they lost contact. during the time izuku was in college and working, katsuki was climbing the rookie heroes and he grown out of his own shitty behaviors thanks to his friends and U.A. curbstomming out the toxicity of his attitude and he realized he fucked up with izuku but even though he has grown up and grown better for it he has never got a chance to redeem himself in front of izuku. so when he’d managed to break into the top 10 pro heroes and there’s this important gala he has to go he found himself face to face with izuku the boy who he had hurt and torment and he’s a fucking escort now? WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF. 

katsuki doesn’t know what he should say to izuku, probably apologized he thinks but what came out is “what the fuck are you supposed to be?” and izuku blinks and then he smiles, slow and sure. “you’re date, kacchan,” izuku says and katsuki feels like his heart is knocked out of his chest bc that’s a name he hasn’t heard in years and just like that it’s like they are back to their childhood youth again except izuku stands before him not as that awkward nerdy useless kid but a man confident in himself and his place in the world and he’s fucking beautiful and katsuki IS WRECKED. 

look heroes don’t really hire escort (i mean some of them may do it but it’s all hush hush) so izuku doesn’t have a lot of interaction with the pros. he’s just as surprised as katsuki but he’s a professional so he doesn’t show it and though always with clients they have to filled out the form of what they’re looking for in their escort and information about themselves katsuki left his form blank on both his request and himself  (bc he’s like i want the best you got bc i won’t bring anyone lesser) so izuku literary went in not knowing who he is supposed to be so he can of adapt into this cool & charming default persona but as soon as he saw it’s katsuki it BLEW OUT OF THE WATER. he is so used to be other ppl for his client that now he found himself caught out and strange that he can’t put back his mask on in front of katsuki bc katsuki is a reminder of all his past, his heartbreak, his crushed dream, and the boy he’d admired and inspired him. it was a rude wake up call for izuku but he tries to recover and fixed the mask back on but ofc nothing goes as plan. 

when they went to the party together katsuki has to watch izuku plays the charming date and become an actual life of the party.  a lot of people flit around katsuki bc he’s the kid that broke into top 10 but katsuki is bristling w/ contempt bc he hates all this hanger ons and fakers pretending to be interest in him just bc he’s known now but izuku is there to distract them and get them off katsuki back. for the civilian izuku just say the right thing at the right time like how he does with his previous clients but when the pro heroes come over to congratulate and talk to katsuki. izuku is able to recite all their achievement, compliment on their latest heroic jobs, and ask them questions about their powers and it’s just really wholesome and sweet and EGOBOOSTING for the pros. and then when the heroes leave izuku and katsuki alone, izuku’s mask immediately dropped and is like “OMFG kacchan that was X and Y, they’re so much more amazing in real life i can’t believe i met them” he went back to fanboy mode and is gushing hopelessly about it and katsuki inwardly smile bc that’s his izuku right there, that’s something he can recognized and cling to. 

katsuki’s friends eventually come over to bother him and him about his date and katsuki doesn’t know where to start bc how does he explain izuku the boy whose ghost had haunted him since middle school and how he had changed as much for himself but also for a chance to meet izuku one day and be the hero that earned izuku’s admiration and regard. izuku is the one that took care of it and just said they’re old childhood friends and doesn’t bring any of their intense violate history up. he easily assimilate into katsuki’s group and katsuki’s friend keep making questioning eyes gesture like they can’t believe someone as good and perfect as izuku is dating katsuki LOL but it’s all just a mask that izuku play to this best ability. only when he’s alone with katsuki that izuku feels like himself and tells hims how katsuki’s friends are eclectic and hilarious and he’s very happy that katsuki finds a group of ppl that support and loves him truly and that alone more than the perfect date MORE THAN PERFECTY WOOING KATSUKI’S COWORKERS AND FRIENDS it’s that ultimately slayed katsuki bc despite everything izuku still wishes the best for katsuki. 

by the end of the night, katsuki demands to take izuku home and when izuku got out of the car katsuki grabs his hand for a moment. “i should have said this sooner but i’m sorry for everything. you didnt deserve what i did and say to you. i was mean and terrible to you as child but i hope, i hope that you can see  that i have changed,” he tells izuku and though he’s not even looking izuku and his words are even and practiced but the sweat of his hand holding izuku’s and the slight tremble that carried through is all izuku needed. izuku nods his head and said, “i know,” with the truest smile that he doesn’t even give his client. 

After that event, izuku assumes that once katsuki made his apology that he has been waiting years to do they’re done then. he won’t see katsuki again but STRANGELY his boss tell him he got another request to go to an even with katsuki. 

on katsuki’s side his agent is kinda giving him a weird look bc why does katsuki of all people want to go to all these black tie events that he has been avoiding like the plague but it’s all just an excuse so he can request izuku again and again lol. even though katsuki finally release all his pent up guilt and frustration with himself over izuku and thought that his past with izuku can be put to the rest... now he wants to see what kind of future he can have with izuku. he started off as mostly curiosity and the chance to see how his childhood friends is doing and why is HE ESCORTING so he keep asking for izuku and the more they spend time together the more he realize how little izuku had changed. he’s still pretty awkward and clumsy and such a nerd when it come heroes once he stopped pretending to be someone other than himself. bc katsuki doesn’t WANT SOME PERFECT BOYFRIEND OR DATE he wants izuku and only izuku. he doesn’t response well when izuku put on that perfect boyfriend mask of his so izuku just dropped his mask more and more with katsuki until he realizes his mask had been long gone. they’re the only two people who knows each other past so intricately and who despite the years having been past and how they all grown up now, their childhood memories still clings to them and that’s hard to erase despite their complicated history with each other. it add layers to their relationship and though their future doesn’t have to include each other they want IT TO BE bc these two are hopelessly drawn to each other by their share past and youthful dreams and wishes.  

so they hang out more and more, getting to know each part of each other, and they even go on more casual dates until izuku is going over to katsuki’s house now. izuku even talk about his former dream of being a hero that had never bore any fruit and how that had haunted him for years. he had thought he put it all behind him but close to katsuki and his pro heroes friends open his old wound again. katsuki doesnt mock or make fun of him about it and even seriously takes in consideration that izuku doesnt have to be a hero to save and that's theres many part of the hero sector he can do like management, support, and analyses which izuku had never consider bc he was so intensely focus on being like katsuki and all might. eventually and surprisingly katsuki is the one to make the first move and asked if it’s okay to kiss izuku and izuku dazedly nods bc it seems like he has been waiting for this moment his whole life. maybe he didn’t love katsuki this way when they were little but he did admire as someone who inspired him but this katsuki all grown up is someone he knows he can safely give his heart to. so they start to date ish but they never talk about their relationship status bc they are both afraid this fragile relationship of theirs may break and ofc THEY NEVER talk about izuku’s job until that happen. 

izuku got a job to go to this event with some pro hero and katsuki wasn’t even supposed to be there but a coworker cancelled so katsuki had to replaced him and there he sees izuku clinging to SOME GUY. izuku is wearing one of his mask and is acting completely DIFFERENT like he’s another person in front of katsuki. it suddenly hit him right there what izuku’s job actually entails and he’s ENRAGE SO MAD BC HE THOUGHT MAYBE MAYBE THIS MEAN ALL THESE TENDER MOMENTS HE HAD WITH IZUKU WAS IZUKU PRETENDING TO BE WHAT KATSUKI NEEDED ALL ALONG. WHAT IF HE’S FAKING IT. WHAT IF HIS FORGIVENSS WAS A LIE AND HE’S PLAYING A TRICK ON KATSUKI :(((((((((((((. 

he confronted izuku later that night when izuku got off work and bc katsuki is dumb and in love he said the exact wrong thing and hurt the person he’d never want to hurt again. “do you sell your body as much as your affection too huh, deku?” he sneers. 

izuku punches katsuki in the face and cries and katsuki is so stunned by it that he doesnt know how to react bc seeing izuku crying undo him completley, it reminds him of their childhood and how he had made izuku cry so many times and now he’s doing it again. “don’t ever contact me again, kacchan,” izuku tells him through a waterfall of tears, leaving katsuki completely numbed. 

from that night onward izuku goes back to his job sealing his heart and going through the motion. while kastuki felt like he had ripped a hole in chest and doesn’t know how to fix it. i think once katsuki realizes what a fucking mess he did through a lot of his friends helping through it that he will eventually confront izuku again and begged him for his forgiveness in the most dramatic way possible LMAO. 

izuku is with one of his regular client again and they’re at a big social event he knows katsuki is unlikely to be there but katsuki IS THERE and he’s storming through the crowd and grabs Izuku, dragging him away from his client and crowd. he takes izuku to back garden and there izuku had enough and about to push him away and go back but kastuki get on his knees and said, “look i know i can be a fucking dumbass around you and i realized i fucked up royally but this is me at my lowest and im on knees for you and only you. only you get to see me looking this pathetic and that drives me insane but i want you so please gimme me another chance to prove that i deserve you,” katsuki confesses and it’s the most rawest emotinal confession that he can delivered and izuku is crying again but this time he’s so happy that he launched himself at kastuki lol. 

they do work it out and get better and communicate more now!!! and they’re so much fucking happier than before. i think eventually izuku does quit his escorting service bc it isn’t viable in the long run and he knows that while katsuki isn’t exactly happy with izuku’s job he has long accept it and have 10000% trust in izuku. izuku eventually finds a job in the hero sector bc that’s all he wanted to do and he get to do and katsuki supports him 100000% all the way AND THEY LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER. 

[once-upon-a-ouat]

OUAT Rewatch 1x04 “Price of Gold”

This episode was more fast-paced than the previous one. They introduced new characters and showed us how the Curse screwed them over. Ashley was the first person Emma helped. It was the first chapter of Operation Cobra. It was also the first time that Emma acted as the Savior.

I loved how they set up Emma and Ashley’s meeting. You could tell Regina’s little speech affected Emma more than she wanted to admit and that led to the cocoa incident (on a side note, Ruby’s reaction was just hilarious) which in turn led to Emma meeting Ashley. The pained look that crossed Emma’s face when Ashley told her that no one thought she could be a mother just killed me. And just a few moments ago Regina was insisting that she knew exactly what kind of person Emma was and then Emma advised Ashley not to let people tell her what she can and can’t be and to take her life into her own hands.

Props to Ashley for actually following that advice. You could tell how much she wanted that baby and it honestly made my heart melt. It was also quite brave of her to try to rob Gold. And she succeeded nonetheless. I absolutely loved that. Ooh, and there was foreshadowing in that scene. We saw the two dolls that turn out to be Geppetto’s parents in the next episode.

In the flashbacks Ella also showed character both in deciding to make a deal with Rumple (although he manipulated her quite skillfully into that) and later in deciding to double-cross him on that deal. I really didn’t appreciate her bravery and determination enough the first time around and I’m sorry for that because she is such a great character. What I loved the most about her is that she isn’t the picture perfect heroine. She made a mistake and she paid for it but she was determined to fight for what she wanted and protect what she loved.

Rumple was an evil genius as always. They never explained why he wanted people’s firstborn children so much though. But what if he wanted the baby so that they would imprison him? He totally knew what was going to happen so he wouldn’t have let it happen if he didn’t want it to (and in the second season we learned that he had a way of escaping but he didn’t use it). That way he got to be exactly where he wanted and Ella still owed him.

And in Storybrooke he didn’t really need the baby so he managed to get something that he actually needed – a favor from Emma. He played his cards so well when he went to her for help. He sounded so concerned for Ashley and he also didn’t miss an opportunity to strike a chord with Emma (mentioning Ashley’s sudden desire to change her life and how he would hate for the baby to be born in prison). He is indeed terrifyingly smart.

The idea that magic always comes with a price was also introduced and in the next few seasons it honestly gets annoying to hear that every time but I was glad they stuck to the idea. But everything good comes to an end and so in the end they discarded that idea just as they discarded many others.

The interactions between Emma and Henry were once again super cute. Especially the “I’m just trying to spend time with you” part. Emma really didn’t have a chance against that.

On that note, Sean’s dad was an ass. In the Enchanted Forest he didn’t seem so bad but we didn’t get to see his reaction to the deal Ella had made so who knows. He might have been just as big of an asshole as he was in Storybrooke. I’m really glad Sean didn’t listen to him and went to his family. He also bought shoes for their daughter. SHOES. Goddammit, OUAT! I think I’m gonna cry again.

Once again they did a great job with the details. The whole thing with Ruby’s wolf was a) a great way of foreshadowing and b) a minor detail which turned out to be very important. It was the thing that made Emma realize that Ruby had given her car to Ashley. Also, I love how fiercely supportive of her friend Ruby was in this episode. Not only did she cover for her, but she also gave her her car without caring that she would probably never get it back. That’s why I love Ruby so much.

Also, in the end of the episode Emma accepted the offer that Graham made her in the beginning of the episode. It was a great way to come full circle and it also led to the next important detail. Graham’s socks under the bed actually revealed that he is the one Regina’s sleeping with. Wow. I don’t know what else to say.

Favorite scene: Emma explaining to Ashley what it would mean for her to keep that child. I think Ashley wasn’t the only one who realized how much she wanted her child. In this episode Emma actually realized that she was a mother (because in 1x02 she said that she wasn’t) and that she wanted to be one. It was a great scene.

Least favorite scene: Regina lying to Henry about the council meeting. She couldn’t have told him where she was going but she could’ve... not gone, y’know. I’m not saying that she can’t have sex but lying to your child so that you could go spend the day fucking doesn’t seem like one of the basics of parenting.

Favorite line: “Anyone who wants to be a mother should damn well be allowed to be one.” - Emma to Henry

Least favorite line: “She’s never shown any evidence of being responsible. How could she possibly know how to be a mother?” - Mitchell Herman to Emma

Same way you know how to be a father, asshole. She’ll learn. And she’ll probably do a lot better than you at that. This line honestly pissed me off so much. Like, leave the girl alone. She wants to be a mother and yeah, not everyone who wants to be a parent does it well but she was doing her best. She was trying for her child. Give her some fucking credit.

All in all, I loved the episode. Like I said, Ashley is a great character and deserves more appreciation. They gave Cinderella’s story a great twist. Emma also grew as a character in this episode. I really wish we had seen an Emma and Ashley friendship once the Curse broke. Once again they managed to give importance to even the smallest details and I loved that.

[the-fallen-blue]

Batgirl: Year One - rightly celebrated masterpiece or overrated hunk of junk?

Little of column A, little of column B.

I think I talked about this on S_D once in reference to this very comic, but there’s this awkward tension in the Batgirl character as a consequence of the era in which she was created. In that Barbara “Batgirl” Gordon was originally a grown-ass woman and the complete equal of Bruce, because at the time those things were both fine. But we now live in an era of comics where it’s gross to call a grown-ass woman “girl” and also unacceptable to let anyone, most especially a young enough woman to go by “girl,” be the equal of Bruce.

I think you can see the balancing act in the story, and in my opinion they failed, layering the story with far too much Batgod and “just a girl” and far too little of Barbara's ability to run neck and neck with the best. Dixon awarded Tim the dignity of figuring out Bruce’s identity before Bruce even knew he existed; Babs was not even permitted the dignity of figuring out Bruce’s identity at the same time that he learned hers, despite the fact that that was actually the actual canon of the character decades before Tim even existed. In fact, Babs is so many steps behind Bruce that she falls for a simple good cop/bad cop manipulation by Bruce and Dick, making her a patsy for not only this experienced adult but also a kid five years younger than her. This is stupid nonsense that undercuts the one single defining trait of Babs in all her incarnations, that being Terrifyingly Smart. (All the Batfam are something More than Bruce; Cass a better fighter, Dick a better leader, Tim a better detective, Babs a better planner and manipulator. In B:YO Babs is Less at everything, it’s so incredibly not okay.) And at that point like what even is the point of writing Babs?

(Also, for some reason they seem to think she’s short? Babs was always tall. Cass is short, Tim is short, Selina and Dick are average, Babs and Bruce are tall. It’s a small niggle but it annoys me.)

On the other hand, there’s a lot of good overwriting of a lot of bad that came between Batgirl’s debut and YO. Like that Zero Hour bullshit about her becoming Batgirl because she had a crush on Bruce, fucking eew. I think it was a really great move to have her be originally inspired by the JSA, in particular Dinah; it alters their dynamic a bit in an interesting way, it preserves the original Batgirl’s initial indifference to Batman and desire to be a hero on her own terms, and it adds a nod to female mentorship that the Batverse sorely needs. (Insert furious rant about Cass here.) I like that she’s so driven, that she comes into the vigilante life very deliberately to help people; original flavor Batgirl sort of stumbled into it and stayed with it because she liked it, which was totally fine, but does leave the story open to attributing the primal fire that drives Oracle to Joker’s intervention, so establishing that as a lifelong Babs trait instead is a good revision. I think her and Canary sniping at each other and swearing to never work together again is great, because apart from the dramatic irony, it actually goes a long way toward establishing why Babs came to Dinah all those years later. (Dinah may be annoyed by her, but she treats her as an equal from the start, a debt Babs does not forget.) I think making Firefly a real menace (if still a loser) and putting Jim in real danger (instead of simply showing him up) is an important modern upgrade that puts Babs’ First Caper on the level that it needs to be in the Serious Modern World of Modern Bats.

Back on the gripping hand again, though, the story is utterly devoid of joy, and it kills me. A big part of what makes Oracle Oracle is that change, the shift from open, unapologetically happy Batgirl to the anonymous brooding spymaster in her lair. It's important to who she is that she used to be Kara’s laughing best friend, that she used to play rooftop tag with Dick, that she can relate to Steph and Dinah and their joy in the job just as much as she does to Cass and Helena and their sense of obligation. (And to Helena and Steph’s anger, but that’s yet another different furious rant.) Making her snarky too-serious grumpy cat from the start strips Oracle of enormous complexity, robs us of a whole lifetime of buoyant and fun Batgirl stories, and is not just a storytelling misstep but an outright disservice to the character.

So yeah. I think on balance it’s the most sustainable of the various Batgirl origins, and the things it does right it does very right and they should certainly be lauded. But it’s also, like most contemporary Batwork, tainted by the Batgod and Frank Miller’s general grimdark Batverse ethos in a way that needs to be acknowledged in any objective evaluation.