#today is not that day because evidently words are hard tonight

[osoreruna]

anyone else think about the vestige world contained within one for all and how it's sorta stockpiled these fragments of quirk factors from all the previous users and combined them into what izuku wields today and how we still see this aura of all might within ofa despite him being quirkless and having no physical factor to contribute and how it's because he in such a literal sense put his soul, his consciousness and entire self into ofa, into being a hero and this symbol of peace for the people and how that separates him and his vestige from all the other users and how that only makes him losing ofa worse because he is, again, in a literal sense, losing an actual piece of him or is it just me —

[gyuswhore]

Hits Different (...'cause it's you) (2)

«« I trace the evidence, make it make some sense Why the wound is still bleedin' »»

PAIRING: kim mingyu x reader

SYNOPSIS: Kim Mingyu was the first friend your brother had brought home for dinner. Fast forward a couple years, his toothy smile and pierced ears would wedge their way into a permanent place in your heart. Nail to a coffin, never to escape.

or;

in which you get rejected by the only boy you've ever loved; a rejection you can't quite shake off.

GENRES: based off of 'Hits Different' by Taylor Swift, brother's best friend!au, brother!seokmin, fluff, angst, smut (in part 2) [MINORS DNI], friends(?) to lovers, university!au.

PLAYLIST: right here!

WORD COUNT (full fic): 40k (im actually embarrassed)

Part 1: 20.2k | Part 2: 20k

masterlist

WARNINGS : slowburn, angst, fluff, mingyus a bit of an airhead and an ass, reader has a hard time managing her feelings, lots of frustrated tears, one sided pining, user toruro x minghao make an appearance, swearing, there's another woman (gasp,,,,,but shes cool so), Nayeon is a darling, Seungcheol is kinda annoying here but we love him, smut, making out, breast play, fingering (f. receiving), p in v sex (protected + unprotected), oral (f. receiving) uhhhh i think that's it lmk tho

[A/N]: Part 2 !! shit goes down in this one so be prepared ig lmao. thank you for the love on part 1, i hope you enjoy the finale too hehe

For the third time this week, you wish you could squeeze your brother’s brains with your own two hands and watch it explode like a grape without legal repercussions. Or parental ones. 

You slam your phone down on the counter after you end your conversation with him, frustrated as you watch the empty shelf where you left your dinner for today in the fridge last night, and the other green box that was actually your brothers. Refusing to eat the dry PB&J he usually packs for himself, you slam the fridge door shut, trudging out the door to leave for work, thoroughly annoyed at the prospect of needing to eat out. 

It’s gone forgotten for most of the day, that is until the clock hits eight and you feel your stomach grumble, immediately putting you in a sour mood as you remember you couldn’t enjoy your pasta because your brother was enjoying your pasta. You only had another hour left, supposing you could wait till you get home to make dinner yourself, not feeling the burger joint across the street in the slightest. Eating a moonpie to satiate yourself for the time being, you go back to stocking the shelves for the new LP shipment, making a vague mental note to ask Mingyu if Jia liked the gift he picked out a couple weeks ago. 

Your opportunity arises almost automatically as you walk over to greet whoever came in, abandoning the opened box of bubble wrapped LPs as you hear the bell chime softly at the front of the store.  

Mingyu was here (again), hands occupied with a bag, looking relieved to find you emerging from the shelves. 

“Oh, you’re here. I was afraid you left already,” he says, smiling slightly. 

“Would’ve been closed if I did.” You nudge your head towards the clearly unlocked door, donning the neon open sign. 

He looks a little dumb, turning to look at the door. “Oh. Right.”

You can’t help but smile a little. “Caught me at a good time though, I was just about to start wrapping up here.” 

He suddenly looks like he’s reminded of what he’s come here for, placing the bag on the desk next to him. “Seok told me to drop this off for you, he said it’s food.” 

Snorting, you take a look at the inside to find takeout from your favourite pasta place, which also happens to be your most expensive favourite pasta place. Seokmin felt bad enough to spend extra dollars on your dinner tonight, you guessed you could forgive him. 

You sigh as you speak. “And you strike as his errand boy yet again, sorry he’s been making you do all this.” 

“Did he piss you off?” Mingyu asks.

“Hm? He’s been pissing me off all week, this is him trying to get on my good side before I spit in his coffee.” 

He laughs at that, a toothy smile that has your stomach lurching. The flashback was brief but vivid all the same, his grin triggering a long forgotten memory. You could almost see the black studs in his ears again, his bangs falling in chunks on his forehead, his face turning into the boyish sixteen year old recollection on your kitchen counter, drinking cans of Monster and helping you lie to your mom. 

“Explains why he was ready to drop that much on a bowl of pasta.” 

“Hey, it’s good.” 

“I don’t doubt it.” He grins, “I’m gonna leave your pasta in your loving embrace, I have to feed my car now. Been putting it off till payday.”

“Oh, right. Thanks for dropping this off though, appreciate it.” You offer him a tight lipped smile. One that he returns, canines almost glinting in the light (but that’s just you). 

“No worries, I’ll see ya around.” You don’t remember what you were meant to ask him until he’s long jingled the glass door shut, walking to his parked car. You supposed it could wait, Jia would’ve liked anything he got her. You could ask him later, not wanting to have him turn around to answer the obvious question. 

The opportunity does not arise as easily as it did this time, a couple weeks passing in relative uneventful indifference, slow days at the store and nights in seven days a week. You were starting to wish you’d taken summer classes while you were stuck here anyway, the mundane days pushing you to believe you’d rather be busy than inexplicably bored. It’s not until your brother has a near mental breakdown from only having a sister as his main recreational contact that there’s a change. 

Mingyu sits on your couches in the dark, useless blanket thrown over his torso as both of his sock clad feet hang out in the air. To be fair, nobody’s looking at anybody as the eyes remain on yet another unnecessary explosion on the screen. You vaguely wonder how the ship hasn’t sunk yet. 

“What the fuck do you mean he’s been alive this whole time?” Seokmin utters, voice thick with the entire stick of butter he stuck into his bowl of popcorn. 

“Who funded this?” Mingyu mumbles from the other end, a deep frown etched on his face. 

“The people who funded the other three monstrosities.” You roll your eyes, inching your way into a sitting position, the ache making its way into the crick of your neck. 

“There’s more?!” The prospect had Mingyu hurtling into a sitting position, but not without his own set of winces as he feels the bones cracking and muscles aching. His hair is a mess, his hoodie nearly backwards, and you can’t help but laugh at the mildly confused and bewildered expression he has on. 

“Yeah, you wanna watch those too?” you ask through giggles.

Glancing at the final pub scene that’s playing on the TV, he's quick to mumble, “Fuck, no.” 

“I haven’t watched a real shitty movie in a while.” Seokmin groans as it’s his turn to stretch. “This was fun. Hollywood’s back.” 

Both you and Mingyu pointedly ignore his statement, your own mind debating whether you wanted to watch another movie. It’s not until you look up to see Mingyu doing something on his phone that you remember what you wanted to ask him. 

“Hey, Mingyu, did — Seokmin!” Your brother’s decided to begin his aerial stretches, touching his toes and cracking his back. You shift your head wildly to get a gap through his restless movements, eventually giving up finding Mingyu. He could hear you. “Did you – ugh – did you get to give Jia her present?” 

You aren’t sure what it is, but the way the question has Seok landing on his heels mid tip toe stretch and how Mingyu’s eyebrows shoot up, you don’t doubt you’ve touched on something sensitive. There’s a part of you that wonders if it’s too late to take it back when both boys make eye contact with each other, but your brother beats you to it. 

“I, uh…forgot to tell her,” he lowtones. 

You look to your brother and then to Mingyu. 

“We broke up.”

Oh.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.” Mingyu smiles a little awkwardly, and Seok makes a strangled sound that may have been a laugh of his own. Or a cough, you aren’t too sure. “But…she did like the present, when I gave it to her anyway.”

“Oh, that’s…that’s good,” you manage, not knowing what to say. “Sorry that happened though…sucks.” 

“She ended it–” that has your own brows shooting up in disbelief. Kim Mingyu got dumped? “–over the phone, she decided she wanted to stay home for a while to figure out what she wanted to do. Uni wasn’t cutting it for her here…” 

“I mean, good for her, I guess. Hope you’re doing okay, though.”

He blows air out of his cheeks, scratching his neck. “I mean, we’re fine. Ended it on good terms.” 

Seokmin’s still standing awkwardly staring at the still running ending credits for something to do. “Should we get food?” 

“I don’t know, are you hungry?” Mingyu asks.

“How is the heartburn not getting to you yet? You basically emptied the country’s dairy reserves in a single popcorn serving,” you grumble. 

“Don’t underestimate my ingestional abilities,” he retorts.

Mingyu stares for a moment. “Aren’t you lactose intoletrant or something?”

Seokmin turns to him, mouth open as he points his finger, “You know, I might be.” 

“No you aren’t, if you were lactose intolerant then I’d be lactose intolerant,” you shoot. 

“Explain the empty can of air freshener in the bathroom after queso and chips?” 

“Have you considered during queso and chips that queso is a dip and not an optional beverage?” 

Mingyu’s cutting between you two before you can go on with your bickering, afraid he’d have to physically peel you off of each other if it goes on, “Let’s just go to a drive thru, you can get your lactose or…non lactose options however you like.” 

That’s how you’re shoved into the backseat of Mingyu’s car, Seokmin fiddling with the GPS to find the nearest McDonalds. 

“How do you not know where the nearest McDonald’s is, you live here,” Mingyu hisses as he takes his fourth right turn in a row.

“We always just order in, who sits in a car and goes to McDonalds.”

“Us apparently,” you lowtone to Mingyu from the back, picking at a crusty flower that you found in between the seats. They ignore you. 

“Okay, I think it’s this one. Dude, get a new GPS, this one responds after fifty years, of course it’s gonna take this long.” 

Their own bickering is starting to zone out into a buzz in your ears as you stare at a patch of leather behind Mingyu’s seat. You vaguely considered that you’re falling asleep. 

The streetlight has other plans, however, when you sense something glinting in the sudden light underneath the seat. Your interest is piqued, moving forward to see what it was. Mingyu senses you shifting and asks you what you’re doing. 

You don’t answer him as you shuffle around to catch sight of it again. And then you see it, a tiny necklace on the slightly dirty mat, a circle charm with a single ‘J’ in the center. You aren’t sure why you froze at the sight, the gold glinting prettily even in the dark. Leaving it there, you emerge from under the seat, trying to seem nonchalant. 

“Nothing. Thought I saw something.”

Mingyu’s common occurrence in the bookstore is starting to concern you, never catching him as the type to read something other than the occasional bad riddles on the back of a cereal box. You stand corrected however, as you find yourself trying to find a hardcover for him on the computer system, mumbling incoherently.

“Never knew you read.” 

“Well, now you do. This one’s really good though, you should read it too.” He notes, motioning towards the paperback version he brought with him for the book he’s finding. 

You snort at his suggestion. “Have you realised this is one of the most popular books in its genre right now? Hard to find someone who hasn’t read it.”

He frowns at the revelation, “Oh. None of my friends read it.”

Seokmin hasn’t opened a book for recreational purposes since he was twelve. As for his other friends…they didn’t exactly seem like the smart type either. You get up to move to the shelf the computer’s indicated, trying to walk off your annoyance at a particular memory before it begins to show. Mingyu follows you in your pursuit to find his book, skimming the shelves himself as he strolled behind you. 

“Oh, right, how’s that exhibition thing going? Forgot to ask about it,” you ask as you spot the box of the hardcovers at the top of the shelf. You grab the ladder that rests near the wall as he answers.

“It’s going pretty good, nearly done. I just need to send the final pieces over – what’re you doing?” 

You grunt as you begin to climb up the metal ladder, trying to get to the box. “Getting your book, genius.”

“Wait–” He moves to grab the ladder at the base as he watches you step higher. “Get down! I’ll go up instead.” 

“You get cold feet at the bottom of an escalator, be serious, Mingyu,” you grunt as you pull the box towards yourself, the ladder shaking with the force it takes, and it has Mingyu gripping the metal tighter. You pull the familiar cover out before closing the box back up. “There.”

“Why would you keep supposed bestsellers there, isn’t this like, in demand?” He grumbles as he continues to hold the ladder as you climb back down. 

“Ran out. Need to restock them at the front, but I’ll do that tomorrow.” You huff as you jump the last step, earning a loud yelp from Mingyu. 

“Chill out,” you chuckle as he puts the ladder away. “Okay, do you want me to look at anything else for you?”

“What would you recommend for my next imaginary adventure?” he asks as he picks out a random book from the shelf, trying to find the blurb. 

“Not that one.” You scrunch your nose at the sight.

“This one I know is popular. What’s wrong with it?” He chuckles as he puts it back.

“Don’t believe everything you see on the internet,” you call out as you walk back to the front.

“And believe you instead?” 

Oh, you wish.

Picking up your current read from the front of the store, you wait for him to reach the end of the opening where you stand to hand it to him. 

“You can decide that for yourself. Haven’t finished it yet, but it looks super promising. Try it out if you want.” 

He barely looks over the glistening title before handing it back to you, and you nearly assume he didn’t want it. 

“Ring both of them up,” he says, and then with a pause he continues, “And anything else you think is good too, I don’t really care.” 

Deciding you’d test the waters with this first recommendation, you only cash him in for two. He doesn’t question it as you do your job behind the desk, making casual conversation as he waits for you to find the right barcode. 

“How far are you with that one?” 

“The one I gave you? Just touched chapter 20, I think.” 

He only hums in response as he pays, grabbing the bag that you push towards him. 

“Let me know how you like it,” you comment before he begins to turn to leave. 

“‘Course.” He grins, and you can't help but grin right back. He leaves you in the store with a slight heat coming up to your cheeks, and a wad of gum in your mouth to keep your stomach in check. 

By the time the next day rolls around, it’s been nearly 24 hours before you hear from him again, his contact seemingly only ever gracing you within the walls of the bookstore – except he isn’t physically here. Mingyu texts you, and you nearly fall out of your chair at the sight of his name on your phone. 

It’s near embarrassing how quickly you pick up your phone, passcode going wrong once, twice, thrice…you decide it’s the top five worst times your phone’s refused face ID. You’re slamming your fingers onto the screen harder than you should, watching the warp in the pixels at the pressure. By the time it does open its secrets for you, the annoyance has settled. Not at him though. 

[Mingyu]: hey [Mingyu]: i got to chap 20  [You]: what [You]: how [Mingyu]: started reading when i got home [Mingyu]: and then i got to 20 [Mingyu]: i think i pulled an all nighter [You]: you think? [You]: was it that good [Mingyu]: couldnt put it down [Mingyu]: i wanna talk about it but my eyes are closing  [You]: you know where to find me when you wake up

The typing ellipses don’t pop up after that, and you assume for the better that he’s succumbed to his afternoon drowsiness. If he was serious about that all nighter (which you don’t doubt, no way he could’ve plowed through twenty chapters and gotten any sleep), you assume he’ll be knocked out for at least the rest of the afternoon. 

Smiling to yourself at the thought of him wanting to text you about your matching achievements (and actively pushing your mind away from the blessed image of a napping Mingyu), you find yourself scrolling up the conversation, trying to remember the last time Mingyu had texted. That was easy to find out as the short scroll past the sparing details from your photography adventures landed you straight into late last year, a sparse conversation regarding your brother’s whereabouts when he wouldn’t answer his phone. 

You remembered the conversation. As mundane and ordinary as it was, it was difficult to forget the way your hands were shaking as you typed your one word replies, how your breathing was coming out uneven at a mere text back. You could argue there was less of that this time round, proud of yourself for learning to control your emotions better. 

There’s a train of thought that leads you to every recent interaction you’ve had with him. The conversations where you could look him in the eye, your relative indifference when he would show up unannounced, the disappearance of the wad of emotions in your stomach at the mere mention of his name. 

The latter may be slightly untrue, but you can't help but note how the ounces of fear within the concoction is gone. You were never quite sure what it was that you were so afraid of, perhaps the fateful night at Seungcheol’s party had answered that question for you, but still. 

“Seok’s not the type to beat me up if I dated his sister. And besides…” He sighs, halting his words.

“Besides what?” Somebody chimes in.

“I’m not interested in going after someone who’s chased my tail for the past fifteen years.”

Despite telling yourself it was the alcohol talking, maybe even a couple puffs of whatever — the mild disappointment remains. Thinking about the weeks following that, the moping and the hurt, you almost don’t blame Mika for acting the way that she did. 

Your brother had always been oblivious to all the frolicking in your heart that would ignite as Mingyu would enter the room, and for over a decade at that. And yet, it was during those weeks that he had noticed you acting like you had been dumped, asking you what on earth was wrong with you. 

“Did somebody say something to you?” he asks.

“Huh?” you frown, annoyed at the way he's planted himself directly in front of the cabinet that held your beloved moonpies. 

“You’re acting like you’ve been rejected by the love of your life. Nayeon’s not telling me anything and you’re being avoidant, what is up with you?” He huffs, hands on his hips. 

Oh, if only he knew how right he was. But you weren’t upset because the love of your life rejected you (anymore, at least), you were upset because he was a public asshole. 

It takes more coaxing from him to get you to start talking. It’s easier when he brings out the big guns: “D’you want me to tell mom?”

You tell him a little, not naming any names, much to his dismay. “Some guy was an ass, something about me being too easy or whatever.” 

“You’re upset because some drunk dude decided to run his mouth?” He scrunches his nose at the thought. “Ignore him, he’s stupid.”

“Thanks for the help, I’m cured,” you deadpan, pushing him aside to get to the gold inside the cabinets. 

“I could get Mingyu to help me beat him up, I just need a name.”

Oh. You briefly wonder how he'd feel if he had to beat up his best friend.

More than his attempts to sound like a cool older brother, the image of Mingyu beating himself up brings you more amusement than anything else. You crack a smile at the thought. 

That was months ago, yet you can’t seem to forget the hurt. Trying to shake off where your thoughts were taking you, you get up to take a walk around the store for something to do, fixing microscopic displacements on the shelves and wondering if you should restock something, only to realize you’d already done that when you came in, not wanting to whip out the ladder again to restock the ones you'd just landed from.  

Landing inevitably back behind the counter, you instinctively reach for the book wedged beside the computer. Your outstretched hand stops midway, thinking about how Mingyu’s reached as far as you in the story quite literally overnight. Retracting your hand, you decide you’d wait. 

The bell chimes signaling a customer, and you find yourself grateful for the distraction.

It’s nearing 8:30 when you decide you should close early. It was slower than usual today, the few walk-ins leaving without purchases too hefty, rendering you bored in your seat for most of the day. You’re locking the drawers of the main desk when Mingyu walks in with the familiar tune of the bell chiming, soft smile as he greets you quietly. 

“How was your nap?” you ask, trying not to giggle at his still dazed expression. 

“Pretty good, didn’t wanna wake up though.” His voice remains relatively coarse, and you don’t miss the light indent on his left cheek. It’s endearing, enough to have you wishing you could cup his face in a loving squish. 

But you don’t. 

“You don’t say,” you comment. Pointing at your own cheek as you continue, “You sure you don’t wanna take the night off too?” 

“Fuck,” he whispers as he looks down to fumble for his phone to see for himself in his front camera. The puffiness hasn’t gone away entirely, evident when he’s frowning and looking downwards, and the urge to squeeze comes hurtling back. 

“Did you drive like this?” 

“Uh, no, I walked.”

“Walked?” You try to comprehend if that was even more dangerous. He only nods. “Why?”

“Wanted to see you.”

It takes effort to not clutch your chest at the way your heart leaps. Kim Mingyu, you bastard. 

“Had to talk about the book.”

Your voice comes out a little more breathless than you’d like, but you hope his drowsiness skips over it. “You could’ve texted.”

He pauses as he mulls it over. “I mean, yeah…I don’t know. I just put my shoes on and came here.”

You decide you’d spare him the brain power and continue your remaining closing duties, talking to him as you move around the store. 

“We can take my car to my place, better than getting distracted here.”

He only nods in response. “Do you want any help?” 

“Nope, just need to turn off the lights and lock the doors. Let me grab my bag.” 

By the time you’re home, an XL pizza and drinks in your arms to satiate Mingyu’s post nap ravenous tendencies, you drop down on the couch with a huff. Seokmin hears the ruckus and appears from his room, not wasting time to break on the pizza with Mingyu as you leave to freshen up. By the time you settle with your own slice it seems as though Mingyu has roused himself significantly more than before. 

“Okay,” you huff as you land on the soft cushioning, “What did you think about the book?”

“Hard to believe this is her first book, it’s really good.” 

“Her world building is amazing, some of the best I’ve read.”

Your back and forth discussion grows increasingly passionate, forgetting the fact that your brother was also right there excluded from the conversation. His head shifts back and forth as the both of you converse, utterly lost. It would’ve been funny, except neither if you were actually looking at him. 

He manages to get a word in as one of you pauses for breath. “Since when do you read?” 

Mingyu gapes at the question, seemingly trying to find an answer. “Recently.”

“Why?” 

“What do you mean why? I just wanted to start reading,” he scoffs in a manner that could be described as exaggerated. If he’s trying to throw Seokmin off his scent, he’s succeeded, as he watches Seokmin get up and announce that he has work to do. That leaves the both of you alone. 

The conversation takes you into the late hours of the night, Mingyu’s prior nap releasing him from the chains of reasonable sleeping hours as he remains wide awake despite the 3 AM time on the dial. You manage to keep up with him, even when he follows you to the kitchen to brew a coffee. 

“Do you usually work this hard just to make coffee?” he asks as he watches you discard the used espresso puck. 

“We have a bottle of the instant stuff here somewhere for when I’m lazy,” you explain as you pour the fresh shots into the prepped ice and milk. “Doesn’t taste the same though.” 

“Coffee is coffee,” he says as he stirs the drink you push towards him. 

“Quite the contrary. Besides, the instant stuff fucks with my stomach, I’d rather not.” You take a sip of your coffee, glancing at the sink. “Will say, hate everything I have to wash afterwards.”

“I’ll do ‘em later, gotta pay you back for all the manual labour that went into this thing,” he refers to the latte he’s sipping on currently. 

“The appreciation is enough. We can make Seok do them in the morning for being a loser and going to bed early,” you snort. Mingyu laughs at that, the image of Seokmin doing dishes while the both of you sleep in. 

“You sure you don’t wanna call it a night?” he asks you as you place yourself on the kitchen counter. 

“I’m having fun, Mingyu, seriously. I’m off tomorrow too, I don’t have to wake up,” you reassure for the nth time. 

He doesn’t reply, only stares up at you from his leaned position. He’s chewing on his lip, and you find yourself unconsciously chewing at your own, the already raw skin stinging at the abrasion. Mingyu’s hands come up to your face slowly, like he knew it was hurting as he pulls your bottom lip to release it with his thumb. 

“You’re gonna bleed,” he whispers. His hand that grasps your chin doesn’t move, rough thumb continuing to graze at your lip lightly. 

“You never stopped picking at your lips, did you?” he wonders out loud, eyes trained on your mouth. 

Your own hand comes to lightly grip at his forearm. He remembers your habit, picking at the skin of your lips since near middle school, getting yelled at when you had to excuse yourself from the dinner table when they would bleed. 

“Old habits die hard.” Your voice is thick despite the gulp you had to take before opening your mouth. 

It was true, probably too much as you continue to look at his near perfect face. The oldest habit, the hardest to die. 

Mingyu drops his hand, landing it in your lap, your own hand still gripping his forearm. You aren’t sure what’s going through you as you trail your hand up further, to his wrists, to the dip of his palm, landing on his fingers. You grip his hand, tight this time. 

“I’m gonna jump,” you whisper, and you feel his grip tighten around yours as he braces to support you off the counter. 

You face him in silence, contemplating, “It’s hot in here, let’s go back out.”

He watches as you pick your cup off the counter and leave, not waiting for him to follow you. He finds himself trying to take deeper breaths, stalling, but not for long as he joins you back on the couch.

It probably came as a shock to both of you the first time Mingyu announced his leave much earlier in the night, when you stopped him, asking him to stay. It was silent for a few sparing moments as you both absorbed what had come out of your mouth, trying to make sense of it. You found yourself needing to coax him a little more to convince him he wasn’t overstaying his visit, that you were having fun. He sits back down, warning you that this was going to be a long night. 

You don’t think you could ever forget the absolute somersault your stomach performed, the after effects leaving you still as a plank. 

It was a long night indeed. And yet, when you found your eyes closing after a fight, much later on the couch with a large blanket shared between the both of you, Mingyu watches you doze off while leaning on the couch facing him, wishing the night was longer. 

If you were awake, you probably would’ve found yourself agreeing.

There’s a lot Mingyu has to learn about himself. He’s reminded of the fact nearly everyday. Especially right now as Seokmin runs his mouth sitting with him at a secluded booth in some bar. 

They had company, a couple guys joining them for dinner before leaving not too long after. That left him and a slightly tipsy Seokmin alone, who’s currently munching on a platter of crackers in front of him. He was bright enough, the energy from the others keeping him going as they played their drinking games and ate their obnoxious amounts of food. It was alot more somber with only the both of them left, his mood deflating as their friends slowly dwindled in number. That wasn’t about to stop him from ordering another beer though. 

“Summer’s so boring,” he grumbles in dejection, flicking a stray crumb off the table. 

“You chose to stay here,” Mingyu replies. 

Seokmin doesn’t answer him, but continues to look like a kicked puppy, a slight pout forming on his face. 

Mingyu fights the urge to scoff, “You can’t possibly be this upset about summer being depressing.” 

“It’s not about that.” 

Mingyu takes a swig of his own drink before sighing loudly, “What’s this about then?”

Seokmin says your name, and Mingyu is suddenly very interested. “She just seems to be doing a lot better since she started working at the bookstore.”

“Better?”

 “She told me about this guy a couple months ago.”

Mingyu’s trying really hard to not look visibly deflated, not that Seokmin would notice considering his state, but he attempts to sound nonchalant regardless. “Do we know him?”

“I – no, that’s not,” he huffs in exasperation, “She said she overheard him, basically calling her easy.”

“Easy?”

“I don’t know, something about her chasing his tail or whatever, she won’t tell me who it is. She hadn’t been doing too great recently and I’m pretty sure it was because of him.” 

It is dawning on Mingyu, embarrassingly slowly, that the guy Seokmin is talking about — may be him. 

His voice is hoarse, a little frantic. “And she’s doing better, you said?”

“Oh yeah, the bookstore’s been amazing for her. Not sure how though, ‘cause she just sits there doing nothing for hours.”

He can’t bring himself to meet Seokmin’s eyes, remnants of his memories flurrying around in his brain in an attempt to figure out what other bullshit he had spewed that day. He was sure you weren’t there, you couldn’t be.

“Maybe doing nothing was what she needed.” Mingyu’s reply is whatever came to him off the top of his head, mind still racing. 

“Hm, I guess. I was trying to get her to tell me, we could’ve chopped his dick off together,” Seokmin grumbles.

Mingyu winces slightly, eyes tight shut as he pinches the bridge of his nose. There’s a protective hand that subconsciously reaches his crotch area. “Yeah, yeah totally.” 

“Fucker got let off easy, he should be happy she’s doing good.” Seokmin continues to ramble, voice getting increasingly louder. 

“Yeah…”

“She’s not easy. My sister isn’t easy at all! Running after his tail, my ass! She doesn’t need some motherfucker with bad hair to be running his mouth, drunk as a bitch.” He stabs a single chopstick into the spare piece of meat on his plate, and the force has Mingyu flinching slightly. 

“How do you know he has bad hair?” Mingyu continues to stare at the impaled piece of beef that Seokmin brings to his mouth. 

“I don’t need to know a motherfucker to know he uses shitty hair gel.” 

Mingyu may try to run his hair gel past Seokmin at some point. But right now, he’s only trying to make it out of the bar with his sex organs intact.

“Hey, we’re past this, remember? She’s doing great right now and that’s all that matters.” Mingyu sounds overly flustered, but he can’t bring himself to care as he attempts to reign in an angry Seokmin. They were garnering looks, and the last thing he wanted was to get kicked out before they had paid. 

Seokmin is still huffing and puffing, but significantly less so as he finds reason in Mingyu’s words. “I’m gonna find out who he is.”

“You hate living in peace.”

“My sister’s hasn’t had any peace because of this dickwad, I’m—” 

“OKAY! Okay, got it. We’ll figure that out when you’re sober.” Mingyu rises from his own seat as he finds Seokmin lifting his own butt off his chair in a near war cry. 

He manages to fend him off, waving for the bill before he has to pull him back from aimlessly marching to whoever’s house he had in mind. He calms down as they wait for the check, finishing the remaining scraps on the table in silence. 

Seokmin seems nearly back to his regular self after a few minutes, forehead creases smoothing over during his cool down time. He speaks, except this time it’s in a more socially acceptable manner.

“Hey, I’ve been noticing, you and her have been getting pretty close lately. I don’t know, it’s just, I woke up and saw both on the couch and —” 

“Here’s your bill!” The waiter cuts him mid sentence, placing the check on the table. 

Mingyu knew what Seokmin was getting to, and he was thanking every star in the galaxy for bringing the waiter into their lives at that exact moment. He’s quick to fuss over the glossy piece of paper, humming and making comments at their purchases to fill in any silent opportunities to let Seokmin continue. Mingyu’s slips his card in the wallet.

“It’s on me,” he announces as he flashes a quick smile to the waiter. “You can cut a ten for yourself.” 

“Wait, what — let’s split, what’s wrong with you?” Seokmin jolts up as registers what’s happening a little too late. 

“It’s fine, you can pay for the next one.” He says as he shifts around the table to look for his phone. “You should probably go to bed too, it’s getting pretty late. Sleep off the beer and whatnot.” 

Seokmin is left speechless as Mingyu gets up, grabbing his stuff. 

“Wait, your card—” Seokmin starts. 

“Is here,” Mingyu spews a quick ‘thanks’ to the waiter, waving his card in front of Seokmin so he’d finally stand the fuck up.

“Do I need to drag you out of that chair, let’s go!” he says, grabbing Seok by the arm to lift him off his seat. It was nearly funny how he couldn’t get him to stay within the vicinity mere minutes ago and now is begging for him to get up. 

By the time Mingyu’s jamming Seok’s key into your apartment, he’s tired of his endless rambling. He can only appreciate his drunk brain for not bringing up the last question he tried asking him. He’s opening the door, urging Seokmin to walk inside, slapping him awake from his nap against the wall.

Mingyu deems it best to physically put him in bed for the furnitures’ sake, pushing him in front to lead him to his room. Mingyu’s spent by the time he’s done and Seokmin is snoring, his back cracking from the hunched position he’s kept from tucking him in and taking his shoes and jacket off. 

He tiptoes out (despite knowing it’d take a marching band to wake him up at that point), closing the door as quietly as possible. 

“What’re you doing here?” 

Mingyu nearly jumps out of his skin, landing a mile as he hears your voice in the dark hallway, hand coming up to his heart. “Jeez— announce yourself, would you?” 

“In my own house?” you raise an eyebrow. 

“Just—” he waves you off as he comes round, standing straight. “I was putting Seok to bed.”

You inhale sharply. “Did you drink?”

“Me? No, but he’s knocked out right now, he’s probably gonna need a pill in the morning,” he replies. 

“Hm, I’ll see to it in the morning, or whenever it is that he wakes up.” 

“Yeah.” Mingyu is standing awkwardly in front of you in the dark hall, not having anything else to say. “I’ll get going now.”

“Oh, right, yeah. Get some sleep,” you say as you let him move past you. 

“You too, don’t know why you’re awake,” he chuckles quietly. 

“Couldn’t sleep, I’ll go to bed now though.”

The awkwardness is painful, Mingyu can feel it in his chest. But what he’s feeling more is the way you look in your night shirt now that you’re in the light of the living room, legs shown farther up than you’d usually let them go. He wonders if you're wearing shorts underneath, but slaps himself out of it when he realises he’s been silent for too long. 

“Uh yeah, I’ll go now. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Mingyu.”

Mingyu replays the last five minutes in his head the entire car ride home, when he’s changing out of his clothes, when he’s brushing his teeth, when he crawls under the warm covers to finally call it a night. Mingyu thinks about what he said all those months ago at a dumb party, how he’s hurt you more than he thought he had. There’s an ache that plunges into him, the thought of you going through that because of him while he stayed blissfully unaware. 

He doesn’t know what he’s gonna do to make it up to you, but right now, he’s happy. Happier than he’s been in a while, falling asleep to the thought of you. 

“Goodnight, Mingyu.”

You, on the other hand, are far from happy as you find yourself in yet another car related predicament. 

Having to run to work in the middle of July is never a preferred option, yet you find yourself needing to do it anyway when you walk out to your engine refusing to start. 

You really needed a new car. 

Abandoning the hunk of what was turning out to be just expensive scrap metal, you rile other options out in your head. 

Seokmin was long gone with his car. The bus was gonna take too long. No way in hell were you about to overpay a taxi to take you somewhere that was essentially just a 15 minute walk (read as run). 

So you find yourself slinging your bag as a crossbody, thanking the heavens that you at least didn’t need to change your shoes. You pray for your white sneakers as you run across town, blurting apologies to passerbys that would gape at your hurried form. As apologetic as you were, it didn’t compare to how sorry you felt for yourself, the heat pricking your skin in an agitated rise anytime you’d slow down. 

The AC is near heavenly as you gasp walking into the bookstore, red faced and hair sticking to your forehead. 

“Sorry,” you gulp frantically. “Sorry, I’m late.”

“Oh god,” you hear your boss comment as she sees you walk in. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I just need a minute. Car broke down.”

She ushers you in front of the AC, waiting for you to collect yourself before taking her leave. 

“I think I’m okay now, sorry about that.” Your chuckle comes out a little choked. So much for being convincing. 

“You really should get a new car. I have a friend who’s daughter is selling hers, do you want me to ask them for you?” She’s patting your shoulder as she talks to you, and you recognize her courage to look past the sweat that’s accumulated there.  

“That’d be great actually, thank you.” 

Your second blow of the day comes right after you’ve finally gotten rid of the buckets of sweat on your body, seating yourself behind your desk to do some digging of your own.

You immediately wish you hadn’t as soon as you open the first second hand market site, the price tags landing you somewhere between never happening and impossible. Groaning, you place your head in your hands as you try to think of what to do. You pray your boss would come back with a quote that isn’t as outrageous as everything else you’ve cursed your eyes upon, seeing as that seemed the only viable option for you. 

Closing the windows off your computer, you decide this was a headache for another time. You reach for your bag to rummage through it, only to find yourself in your third predicament of the day. 

You had forgotten your book. 

It shouldn’t have been a worry, considering you were in a bookstore and had access to about 56 more of the same edition that you could borrow for the day. Except it was a worry, because your copy had been religiously tabbed and annotated as you would read, not a single thought left to be forgotten in your head as they would spring up. You can almost see the pink cover sitting on your desk and you nearly begin to cry. 

You wonder if you could break your ‘one book at a time’ streak for the sake of it, picking up another one off the shelf to start. The thought nearly makes you gag, the anxiety of losing interest in your current one leading you to sit aimlessly at your desk for the rest of the day. 

What’s even more anxiety inducing to you, however, was the promise you’d made with Mingyu the week prior, to be finished with the book by the end of today so you could finally decide whether the end was worth it or not. The thought has you nearly picking up a copy off the shelf anyway, annotations be damned. Force of habit, however, forbids you as you are shunned by yourself to play solitaire for the rest of the day. 

Things seem to look up for you though, as you find yourself reading a text from Mingyu nearly halfway through your day. 

You hadn’t spoken to Mingyu at all for the entire week, caving when you found an excuse to finally talk to him to ask where he’d left off on the book. It was even longer before that, reaching the near three week mark where you were virtually zero contact.  

You’d be lying if you said it didn’t bother you, his sudden absence raising a mild panic within you as your mind raced with the possibilities. 

Was he uncomfortable with you? 

Was he avoiding you? 

Were you less low key than you thought? Was he catching on to how you still weren’t over him? 

The wilder thoughts seemed to be laid to rest when you couldn’t take it anymore, texting under the guise of your mutual book topic. Your brain still couldn’t handle it, picking up minuscule details in his texting behavior. Perhaps his replies were choppy, perhaps they were shorter than usual, but it was enough to give your mind the rest it needed regardless of whatever the facts were. 

Needless to say, you were more than happy to receive a text from him first after weeks, immediately replying. 

[Mingyu]: hey  [Mingyu]: are you at work today?  [You]: yeah  [You]: i get off at 10 tho  [Mingyu]: can i see you today? 

You try to contain the growing flurry of excitement as you type. It was easier to stay casual over text, you find yourself appreciating. 

[You]: course [You]: are you coming to the store?  [Mingyu]: i’ll meet you at your place when you get off  [You]: okay!!! [You]: see you then 

There’s a ghost of a smile on your face as you switch to playing computer chess in celebration. Your day was going horribly, but perhaps it was to balance out the happiness you were feeling at the thought of seeing Mingyu in person after nearly a month. 

Were you being dramatic? Possibly. But you figured you’d been left waiting long enough. You let yourself have a spring in your step for the rest of the day, closing up nearly an hour early as you practically skipped back home, enjoying the significantly better nightly weather. Maybe you were abusing your employee privileges, but you couldn’t take the anticipation anymore. 

Humming to yourself, you're hopping into the shower as soon as you get home, wanting to freshen up as quickly as possible before he gets here. It was near heaven’s plan the way the day is unfolding for you. Perhaps the universe knew you needed the time to unwind today, bringing Mingyu to you despite the near four week gap. 

Grabbing your pens and your book, you settle on the kitchen counter to do something you’d been looking forward to all day, nearly giddy that Mingyu would be joining you to wind down with you soon enough. You’re invested by the time the doorbell rings, a simultaneous text from Mingyu, confirming that he was at the door. 

Opening the front door is probably the easiest thing you’ve done all day, grin at the ready as you greet him. 

“Hey,” you breathe out at the sight of him. 

“Hi,” he replies, slipping inside as you give him space to take off his shoes. 

Leading him into the kitchen, you comment lightheartedly, “Nice to see you’re still alive.” 

He chuckles slightly at that, “Yeah…sorry about that. I’ve been pretty caught up with…stuff.”

“The exhibition? Weren’t you nearly done with that?” you question as you pass him a glass of water. 

He takes a sip before setting it down again, both hands holding the cup on the counter. “It wasn’t that, I’ve been done for a while. Just waiting.” 

“It’s next week, isn’t it?” 

He hums in response, taking another minuscule sip of water.  

“What was it that was keeping you this occupied for so long then?” you continue with a slight snort, trying not to over analyze his slightly…off putting behavior. 

“Uh,” he starts, “Is Seokmin home?” 

“Seokmin?” you frown, confused. Was he here to see your brother? “He’s out. I thought you knew.”

“Yeah, I know. Just confirming.” 

“Oh.” You sit down on your own chair at the counter, trying to make sense of his mood. 

“Mingyu, are you okay—”

“I need to talk to you.” 

“O-okay.” 

It’s silent. Painfully so. 

“I don’t know how else to bring this up so I’m just gonna cut to the chase.” 

There’s no reply from your end as you simply stare at him in anticipation, wondering what on earth had him looking this serious as he faces you in his seat. 

“I know I’ve done a lot to hurt you. Never enough to match what you’ve felt, but I know you’ve been through the muck because of me, and it makes me feel horrible that I was the cause of something like that.” 

“Mingyu—“

“I want to apologize, before I say anything else. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. And I know an apology isn’t gonna take away what I did to you, but I just need you to know that I’m really, really sorry.”

His breathing is heavy as he talks, while yours is near nonexistent as you need to remind yourself to breathe manually. 

“I’ve done a lot of growing up in the past year. And I hate myself for making you a subject of that transition when you were the last person that deserved it. I’m happy to say that won’t happen again, because I’ve learned my lesson. For good.”

He pauses. 

“I’m not asking you to forgive me, because… because I don’t know if I’ll ever deserve it for what I’m about to say. I may be acting selfish right now but, I think you deserve to know after everything.”

“I love you. I love you so, so much it hurts. I…I’m sorry, I love you. I don’t know how else to say it but, I love you. And I might be hurting you even more with this but I swear I’m not lying. I love you.”

There’s tears now, heavy ones that drip down his face as he refuses to look back up at you, eyes screwed shut in a desperate attempt to halt the pure emotion that’s trailing down. 

You have your own wet cheeks, glossy, shaking eyes that don’t tear away from his hunched form. You’re listening. You’re listening to everything and it’s too much. 

“Mingyu,” you whisper. You give up on trying to talk as you let out a breath that sounds almost like a sob. 

It’s silent for a few more moments as you absorb everything that’s happening, mind running a hundred miles an hour yet, still as a rock. It’s too much. 

“Mingyu, I can’t believe you’re saying this to me.” Your voice is quivering, but you manage the words. “After everything. You’re standing in this very kitchen and saying this to me.”

The deja vu was overwhelming, and you’re projected back to last year when the both of you stood on these very tiles, as you poured your heart out to the man in front of you, only to be told you were an idiot to think he could ever love you like that. The words may not have been said, but the message was clear: you were not made for Kim Mingyu. 

And yet, you find yourself in front of an apologetic man, expressing his remorse. And oozing love for you, of all people. Why now? You want to scream. Where was this when you were ready to take him so willingly in your arms. 

You’re lying if you say you still don’t want to plant yourself in his hold to sob out your own wretched “I love you”’s. You wanted to go to him. To take what you’ve wanted for so, so long. 

But you can’t. You can’t do it. 

“I know,” he whispers. “I’m not asking you to do something about any of this. I’m not asking anything of you at all. I just need you to know.”

You bite back a remark, trying so hard to calm yourself down. 

“I think you should go.” Your voice breaks. “Please.”

Mingyu is gone. But his scent lingers. His cup remains on the counter, the same one he put his lips to. As he prepared to speak, and speak, and speak. 

You can’t stand to stay in the kitchen anymore. 

You were fourteen the first time Mingyu broke your heart. 

It was an accident, perhaps, considering you were willing to do absolutely anything to be around Mingyu when your brother would have him over. What you didn’t know this time, was that the both of them had company. 

Tiptoeing down the hall was easy the second you heard your brother's voice coming from the kitchen, announcing that he was getting drinks for them. The plan was simple; walk in under the guise of being annoyed at Seokmin for something and then relish when Mingyu would defend you from his inevitable rage — except this time you’d have a few extra minutes alone with him before your brother trudged back.  

Putting on the best annoyed face you could, you stalk past Seokmin’s room, immediately wishing you hadn’t. Mingyu was in your brother's room as expected, sitting on the floor, surrounded by papers with numbers and letters too complex. But he wasn’t alone. There was a girl that sat between his legs, turned over in his arms as they whisper to each other. They weren’t studying at all; the giggles and smiles were a dead giveaway. 

You halt in your tracks at the edge of the doorway in mild disbelief, brain computing the situation in front of you. They hadn’t noticed you yet, it was apparent with the way she leans into him to place her lips on his in a peck. 

There’s a yell of your name behind you as Seokmin sees you loitering around his room. You jump in surprise, not expecting him back so quickly. Your brother, too, isn’t alone, a girl of his own accompanying him with her arms full of cans, peeking over his shoulder to catch sight of your distressed form. 

“What’re you doing?”

Running was the worst thing you could do, and yet you found yourself doing just that in your cornered state. Catapulting face first into your pillows, the sobs coming before you could muffle them. It was humiliating, even more so when you feel your mother’s hand coming up to your shoulder in a stretch of comfort. 

“I yelled at him, he won’t do it again!” she attempted to reason with you, trying endlessly to get you to emerge from your cavern of comforters. 

“It’s not that!” you groan.

“What is it then? Darling, I won’t know if you won’t tell me.” 

Your mother gave up a little bit after that, and your brother had apologized for yelling at you; apologized for all the wrong reasons. You brushed him over.

There were worse things circling your mind in that moment, like the image of Mingyu in a liplock with another girl, the image of him holding her with all his limbs. 

You couldn’t imagine anything worse than that.

“What the fuck, is wrong with the both of you?” Your brother swoops in like a pesky seagull and snatches the book right out of your hands, eyes blown in exasperation. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?! Give it back!” you yell, reaching for the book that he’s placed over his head. Climbing the couch does little when he simply moves away from you. 

“Not until you tell me what’s going on between you and Mingyu.” 

“Nothing is — ugh,” you drop back onto the couch in frustration. You take a deep breath. “Nothing is going on. Now can I have my fucking book back?” 

“No, you're avoiding each other.”

“He’s your friend, why would I hang out with him?” 

“Stop dodging the question!” he spits. 

“Stop dodging.” You exclaim as you jump for the book another time. 

“Why don’t you want to go to the exhibition?” He throws the book to the corner of the room. It takes every fiber in your body to stop yourself from plucking every strand of hair off his head. 

“Seokmin!” you scream. 

“Your book’s fine. Is this about the guy you told me about?” He asks, hands grabbing you by the upper arms, forcing you to look at him. 

“No, it’s not,” you grit. 

“Why don’t you want to go to the exhibition?” he repeats, making direct eye contact. 

“Because,” you start, exhaling deeply, “I’m tired.”

“It’s an exhibition for fucks sake, an exhibition with your face plastered all over it. You go in for five minutes and you’re out. Put something on and let’s go!” 

“I don’t want to go.”

“I’m not taking no for an answer. You’ve been doing nothing but go to work and stay home, you need air.”

“I need you out of my air,” you swat his hands away, thoroughly disgruntled. 

“I’m giving you twenty minutes.” 

He was serious, you realize as he begins to pound on your door with two minutes left to spare. You decided you weren’t about to be embarrassing and show up in your sweatpants, encasing the final shreds of dignity you had left. You couldn’t imagine being asked “who?” when the face on the walls doesn’t match with the one you brought to the place, not doubting the number of fancy scouters that’d be gracing the crowd tonight.

 Opting for a plain black dress and a coverup felt enough for you, your usual makeup and matching accessories helping you feel better about the bags under your eyes your concealer couldn’t quite erase. 

Seokmin says nothing for probable fear of having you landing back on the couch, choosing to ask you a simple, “Ready?” instead.

The drive is short and silent, the remnants of you and your brother's prior argument still hanging in the air. You weren’t about to apologize to each other, but you would let the hours cool you off before you’re back to your normal selves. For now, you’re glad to step out of the stuffy car, the anticipation having you needing to breathe in an elevated sense. 

The place is more crowded than you thought it would be, men and women in fancier than necessary clothes loitering the entrance carpeting. You suddenly feel underdressed. 

Catching Mingyu’s name is easy, the display at the front doing the most to highlight the star of the night, catching sight of him is proving a little more difficult. Not that you’re trying, but Seokmin’s embarrassing neck stretches are having you restraining yourself from pulling him down by the collar. 

Walking into the display is a strange experience, for you at least. The pictures are larger than you’d thought they would be, spanning the giant walls of the gallery. Your face is huge. 

There’s a few other one’s that scatter between the portraits, beautiful all the same. You find yourself wandering as you note the plaques next to the pieces, descriptions and words from the artist; Mingyu’s words. It’s easy to begin looking at the pictures through his eyes, the meticulous scanning you’re doing proving easier for you to zone out despite the crowd. 

You’ve gone through nearly every picture, approaching the last one, the one that looked a little more important than the rest as you take in its size. The steps you take towards the plaque are halted as you hear someone calling for you. You recognize his voice, how could you not?

Mingyu is weaving through the crowd to get to you, eyes locked as he tries to make way for himself. Your mouth is open by the time he’s here, mind frantic as you try to figure out what you should say. 

Congratulations.

You’ve worked hard on this. 

This looks great.

How’ve you been?

“You’re here,” he says, simple as that. 

“I’m here,” you breathe out, a nervous smile on your face as you look down at your shoes. 

“Seok told me you were here too.” 

Your head snaps up, “You were looking for me?” 

“I mean, it’s a bit difficult with the crowd—”

“Oh,” you cut him off before you could forget. “Congratulations, by the way. The turnout looks great.”

“Uh, yeah. It’s great.” His eyes skim around the large hall.

You hate how his craning is drawing your eyes to everything else. So to say the plain black button up and slacks he’s sporting, the thin chain he wears around the unbuttoned collar. You hate how he’s put in no effort, and you hate how it makes him look even better somehow. 

“Are you enjoying yourself?” he asks after he rounds back to you. 

Your reply is drowned in your throat as somebody calls for him across the hall, pointing at a mic in their hands. 

“I have to go address everyone, you’ll be here, right?” he asks, but he once again has no chance to listen to your answer when somebody physically drags him by the elbow and yanks him away from you. You lose sight of him in the crowd of people, his face disappearing.

It gives you enough opportunity to slowly turn around to go back to your plaque reading, exhaling loudly as you walk up to the final, biggest piece on the wall. It’s labeled as the focal point of the collection. It’s a picture of you, and for some reason, you can’t remember taking it, or posing for it at all. 

You recognize the mountain top, more so the grueling trek up the place for your last shoot with him. It’s a side profile, your arms folding over the railing, face tucked into your padded arms. A single ray of light illuminates your eyes, the background soft. 

The picture was an accident. A moment that may have gone forgotten, yet one that appeared right when it was meant to. A mistake made on purpose, one that manages to carry the weight of years. A slow accession of golden rays, dawn illuminating the subject in hues indescribable, except those that describe a feeling. A feeling in turn, indescribable.

Soft. Legible. New.

You take a step back. 

And another

Then another. 

You look at the picture, the picture of you. Taken the one time you weren’t actively posing for the camera, the one time he wasn’t meant to take a picture of you. It landed here, at the seemingly deserved position of a final piece. The piece that was meant to emulate all that the artist wanted to come out of his work. 

You crane your neck up higher, the name of the collection in bold block letters right above the picture that supposedly says it all. 

THE BEGINNING

There’s a ball forming in your throat, one that's cementing itself where it stays. 

There’s noise happening in your peripherals, somebody speaking into a mic on stage. You’re not paying attention until you hear his name. 

“I’m pleased to present to you the man of the hour, mister Kim Mingyu…” 

You watch with glossy eyes as he takes the stand, clearing his throat before he begins to speak. 

You needed to leave. 

Finding Seokmin is easy, and you thank every plane of heaven that it is, considering you’d rather be caught dead than be seen red nosed and teary eyed. 

“Let’s go home.”

“Huh? Right now? He just started talking.” Seokmin argues, tearing his eyes away from the stage to gape at you, only to note the expression on your face. “Hey, what’s wrong?” 

“Seokmin, you said five minutes.” You grip his sleeve tight. “Please, either give me the keys, or I’ll get a cab.” 

He pauses for a moment, and you immediately hate yourself for making him choose between staying for his best friend or leaving for his sister. He slowly comes down to grip your hand, pulling you away. 

“Let me drop you off home.” 

You’ve calmed down a significant amount during the car ride home, managing to convince (fight) Seokmin into going back to the exhibition hall before Mingyu noticed that he was gone. You wouldn’t forgive yourself if you made him miss something as important as this just because you couldn’t control your emotions.

He hugs you at the door, tight, and you hug back just as strong, holding back the river of tears that suddenly threaten to let loose. He presses his lips to your temple, muttering a little ‘I love you’ before he leaves. He knew nothing, yet was ready to comfort you like he did.

You let yourself sob after that, as wracking and strong as they’d come. It’s freeing, to fall to your knees and simply cry like a child. You aren’t sure what it is that you’re crying about, yet you know all the same. The thought of both those things make your head begin to spin, causing another fresh wave of tears to come rushing down. 

Remnants of the day Mingyu spoke his truth to you in your own kitchen come tumbling back; the shock, the anger, the hurt, and despite everything, the love.

You loved Mingyu, you weren’t going to sit here and deny it when you were a mess of jewels on the floor with only his face at the forefront of your mind. You’re a liar if you say you don’t love him. You’re a liar if you say you’ll ever stop. 

Years and years of pining and wishing and praying, to hope that one day, Mingyu would open his eyes with the realization that he loves you the same. 

The day came. Your prayers were granted, your wishes came true; you no longer had to sit on the sidelines as an ignored constant. And yet, you found yourself wanting to be anywhere but in his presence as the prayer unfolded. 

Were you too weak to handle reciprocation? Have you gotten comfortable pining by yourself? Or was it something completely else. Were you still hurt by his words? Were you aghast at his audacity to have the courage to speak his heart to you, when you went years without doing so? 

Were you protecting yourself? Or were you actively throwing the golden chance you’d received right out the window? 

You’re tired, it’s evident with the effort it takes you to simply reach your bedroom, heels thrown somewhere in the doorway as you made the trek barefooted. Hoping your muscles would release the pent up tension at the learnt feeling of the mattress, you find yourself closing your eyes awaiting the relief. 

Still clad in your dress and makeup, you attempt to find the solace of sleep, knowing you’d feel nothing if there was nothing to perceive. The universe doesn’t seem to want to give you that luxury, your eyes wide awake despite closed lids. The thoughts aren’t showing signs of slowing down either, every part of your mind alive as you remain still as a rock on your bed. 

You aren’t sure how long you’ve been in bed, but as you hear the distinct jingle of keys in a lock, you know Seokmin is home. The door of your room is opened very quietly, and closed just as quick when he sees your form in bed seemingly asleep. 

You open your eyes for the first time in hours, the darkness remaining as you slowly sit up against the cushions. Your movements are sluggish as you stare into the abyss, brain quiet for once as you swing your bare legs over the mattress, slowly trudging down the hall to your brother's bedroom. 

Knocking slowly, you hear a slight shuffle before the door is opened, the light from inside the room illuminating the dark hall and forcing you to squint. 

“Did I wake you?” Seokmin asks, sporting formal trousers with his dinosaur pajama shirt.

“Uh, no, I was awake.”

“Why haven’t you changed yet?” 

You ignore him, cutting straight to the chase, “Can I borrow your car?” 

There’s silence for nearly three seconds before Seokmin speaks, “What on earth do you need my car for this late at night?” 

“Nayeon’s” 

“Bullshit.”

You let out a loud, loud sigh, “Will you believe it for now?” 

Your brother looks at you with an expression you can’t really pinpoint, eyes like he’s scanning into your soul. “The keys are at the door.”

You walk back to your room to grab your phone and your cover up, not bothering to change as you grab Seokmin’s keys and leave. It probably wasn’t a good idea to leave the house so late at night, but your brain seems to have activated tunnel vision as you nearly stalk towards the car. You’re pulling up to where you need to be within minutes, the empty roads leading you on near autopilot. 

By the time you’re standing in front of the door, your desire to settle this once and for all turns pungent in your head. You needed to end this one way or another, you were tired of running in circles. 

Ringing the doorbell is easy, it’s just the realization that settles during those few moments of waiting that grab you by the throat. You were really doing this. 

Mingyu opens the door quicker than you’d anticipated, after briefly wondering if he’d already gone to sleep after the long day he’s probably had. His brows furrow as he registers you at his door, your name tumbling out of his lips in mild confusion. He’s still in the clothes you saw him last, and you doubt it’s been long since he got home too. 

“Promise me you mean it,” you say. 

“What?”

“Promise me you mean it.”

“Mean what?” The crease between his brows deepens as he tries to make sense of what you’re saying. 

“Whatever you said. Promise me you mean it. Promise me. On all the years we spent together, on every truth you've ever said to me. Promise on me that you mean it.”

The silence is deafening, yet you wait. You wait for him to respond. You wait for him to understand what you’re saying. 

Mingyu gulps before opening his door wider, expression neutralizing slightly as he invites you inside. “Why're you standing on the door? Come inside.”

“I’m not taking another step in your direction, Kim Mingyu, not until you answer me,” you snap. 

Letting his hand leave the grip on the door, he brings them both up to rub at his face, taking a simultaneous breath, deep and shaky. When he emerges his eyes are showing a hint of red as he licks his lips. 

Your grip on your own fingers tighten as Mingyu talks. 

“I want to rip my heart out for what it wants from you. I want to rip it out for what it did to yours. Believe me when I say I’ve forgotten how it felt to be this sincere. I love you. I don't deserve to say it, but I love you.”

There’s a beat that passes, one that you barely feel as you throw your bag on the floor of his entryway, grabbing him by the collar with both hands as you yank his face down to hover right in front of yours, nose touching, lips not quite. 

“If you’re lying to me,” you whisper, shaky voiced, “I’m gonna chop your balls off.”

Mingyu answers for you as he finally, finally closes the cursed gap between you, lips capturing yours in a long awaited kiss. You let him pull you inside as you move your lips against each other, the distinct click of the door signaling you were finally inside. 

His hands grip your hips and waist in a manner that’s near painful, yet you can’t find yourself complaining even as he pushes you against the now closed door, hard. His mouth leaves yours for what is barely a second, before your desperate hands move his face back in to continue what you’ve been wanting to do for years. 

His mouth is warm, the vaguest hint of champagne on his tongue. You wonder how many toasts he’s clinked and downed, how many times he thought of you as he celebrated. 

“I love you,” you mumble against his lips. 

Mingyu’s hands are pushing your body against his own, so flush and tight you can barely breathe. Like he’d rather die than bring space between the two of you in that moment. 

“I love you, too,” he mumbled back between kisses. “I love you so much.”

Both of your hands are beginning to roam, less innocent than the fingers tangled in his hair and digging into his shoulders, less innocent than the grips on your hips and neck. It isn’t until his hands are groping your ass that you begin to subconsciously tug at his shirt, wanting the wretched thing out of the way to finally feel him in full. 

There’s a warm hand that grips yours as he stops you, lips pulling away slightly as he rests his forehead against yours. There’s a wild moment of sobriety as you wonder if you’ve read the situation wrong, if you pushed too far. 

“You’re asking me for something I’m ready to give you.” He sounds breathless. “But I need to know if you really want it.”

He looks absolutely gorgeous with his swollen lips, your lipstick staining his own mouth, his messy hair from all the desperate fingers running through them. It takes one look into his bedroom eyes to have your yeses tumbling out your mouth. 

“I want it. I want it if you’ll give it to me. Mingyu, please.”

He leans in to give you a soft peck before pulling away slowly. “You can stop me whenever, just say the word.”

He’s facing you as he speaks, hands pulling you further into the house in slow and steady steps. “I’m not gonna do anything you don’t want me to, I promise.”

By the time you reach the four walls of his bedroom, you’re itching to have his hands on you again, something he senses as he presses his hot mouth to your awaiting lips. His touches become decreasingly respectful as his hands run up your sides, thumbs brushing against the sides of your clothed breasts as he moves his mouth further down. 

Kisses line your jaw, reaching the joint as he nips at your earlobe teasingly. Pushing the coverup off of your shoulders is easy, fingers tracing the exposed skin as his mouth moves down to your neck, nipping and sucking teasingly. Your breathing is embarrassingly heavy. 

“You’re gorgeous,” you hear him breathe out. 

His fingers fit under the zipper of your dress not too long after, pulling it down to reveal your back tantalizingly slow. His hands smooth over your waist once he reaches the bottom, bringing them up to your upper body as you feel his palms grab your breasts in a soft squeeze. The moan you let out is small, but enough to encourage him to bring his hands to the straps of your dress, pulling them down your shoulders one after the other. 

“Do you realize how good you looked in this today,” he says. “Was so happy you came, so, so happy to see you after so long.”

Mingyu kisses you again in a slow, passionate manner, hands pushing down the tight fabric of the bodice to let it fall off your body to a pile on the floor. It leaves you bare save for your bra and panties. 

Mingyu lets out a groan at the sight in the dimly lit room, the sound checking in as one of the hottest things you’ve ever heard, the vibrations leading straight to your core like they belonged there. The focus goes back to his hands that continue to roam your body, mouth traveling further south to leave hot, open mouthed kisses on your cleavage. 

Your own fingers come up to fiddle with the buttons of his dress shirt, managing to pull a couple loose as you whine, “Mingyu.”

“Patience, my love.” He moves you backwards slowly as his mouth leaves your chest, pushing you into the plush of his mattress as you feel the back of your knees bump into the edge. “Let me take my time with you.”

He brings a knee up to the bed as he keeps his gaze on you, beginning to unbutton the rest of his shirt as you prop yourself up on your elbows. For once, you’re allowed to stare at the sculpt of his chest and abdomen, letting your gaze take you to the dipped V before the cut off. The mere sight of his fingers working against his belt have you needing to close your thighs for the sake of your now throbbing core. 

Only clad in his dark boxers, you let him climb over you in a way you can only describe as a prowl, inserting himself between your legs as he pushes your head up to the headboard. The hand that splays out on your thigh is having the muscle twitch, the anticipation for what he might do next gripping you. 

“Let me get this off of you,” he says with his hands toying with the elastic of your bra, prompting you to arch your back so he could reach under to unclasp it in a way you can only call professional. 

There’s barely any time for you to feel a semblance of embarrassment when he flings the padding away, mouth coming in direct contact with your breast in a harsh suck. The feeling has you moaning his name into the dark room, only encouraging his wet tongue to circle around the bud before going back to suckling. He doesn’t forget your other breast as he brings his hand up to squeeze the mound and play with your nipples the same. 

The sensations are overwhelming already, your hands gripping his hair in desperation as you throw your head back at his ministrations. The ache in your underwear is becoming increasingly difficult to resist, the foreign feeling of his mound against your inner thigh only coursing more want into your awaiting heat. 

Your chest is a mess of redness and saliva but the time Mingyu’s had his fill, pulling away to admire the work he’s left. 

“Fuck, Mingyu, please,” his name is the only thing that comes out in your pleas, hoping he’d give you wanted before you lost your mind for good. 

“I love this lighting on you,” he says simply, moving to sit on his knees as he takes his eyes up and down your practically naked frame. 

Both hands come in to push your thighs further apart, giving him better access to the gold that sits right in between. “You’re beautiful.” 

You feel the pad of his thumb come in contact with your clit in the lightest pressure, slowly brushing over the muscle as he continues. “The most gorgeous thing I’ve ever seen.” 

He presses his thumb in further, pushing down to meet your hole, the source of the large wet patch on the fabric of panties. The whimpers the new feeling is having you let out are near embarrassing. Hooking his fingers around your panties, he asks, “Can I take these off?” 

“Yes!” you gasp out immediately, hip rising to let them slide the pesky fabric off and away. 

He wastes no time in bringing his fingers to your folds, gathering your arousal in his fingers as he spreads them across your throbbing clit. He’s rubbing the area in circular motions, the feeling having you wracking out sounds you never thought you could make. The sheets are bunched up in your grip as you throw your head back at the feeling that encases you, eyes screwed shut. 

“Oh, Mingyu,” 

That only encourages him as his other hand joins the party, a lone finger circling your entrance in preparation to plunge into you, slowly, all the way to the hilt of his finger. Zoning in on the feeling, the pump of his fingers into your core, the constant ministrations of his other thumb on your clit. Your hands leave his wrinkled sheets as they come in to grip his wrists and forearm, needing to feel his skin to anchor yourself into the present. Not being able to bring yourself to open your eyes, he takes it upon himself to insert another finger, encouraging your lids to fly open at the stretch and the loud moan that comes with it. 

“God, you’re so fucking wet, I’m barely pushing.” It may have embarrassed you a little if you weren’t so withdrawn from pleasure, the prospect only having you whimper his name even more. 

It isn’t when he curls his fingers inside you that you feel the need to stifle the sounds that come out of your throat, hand to mouth as the volume has you needing to shut yourself up. He brings his hand off your clit to grab you by the wrist, freeing your mouth of restraint. 

“Don’t,” his voice gravelly as he gets off his knees to hover over you, his other hand continuing to pump his fingers in and out of you in perfect motions. “I wanna hear your voice. I wanna hear all the pretty sounds you’re making.”

He leans in to place a chaste kiss on your mouth, fingers quickening their pace as your sounds grow louder, “Mingyu, I think I’m…I think I’m close.” 

“It’s okay, let go whenever, darling, it’s okay.” His other hand goes back to its rightful position on your clit, thumb circling the bud in quick motions as he encourages you to climax. 

And you do. The blissful release comes crashing into you hard, the feeling leaving nothing but white hot space in the expanse of your brain, letting the feeling take over as you melt into the sheets. “F-fuck…”

He doesn’t stop either hand till you physically have to push his fingers off of you, the overstimulation coming in hot. 

You don’t come around for a little bit, but feel every searing kiss he leaves on your skin in the aftermath. Pressed into your chest, your collarbones, you neck and your jaw. He makes his way up to your face slowly, pressing his lips onto your closed lids as you wait for your breathing to even out. His face is the first thing you see when you open your eyes, leaning forward to press your own lips against his. 

“How was that?” he asks slowly, and you don’t miss the hint of a smirk on his face. You can’t help but break into a smile of your own. 

“Great.”

“Great?”

“Amazing.” You lean in to kiss him again, palms coming in contact with the expanse of his back as you move your mouths together. It’s not long before your fingers reach the waistband of his boxers, hands coming up front to feel him through the fabric, palming him in the process. 

You feel him shudder in your hold, lips pulling away as he stares into your eyes. 

“What?” you ask in a whisper when he makes no other moves. 

“I’m trying to think if I have condoms or not,” he whispers back, and you can’t help but let out a laugh at his delivery. He begins to giggle with you, backing up as he reaches over to rummage through his nightstand. 

“Fuck yeah,” you hear him say as he comes round with the shiny pack. He’s giggling as he undoes the wrapper, the lighthearted nature of it all bringing a laugh to your own lips. 

Pulling his underwear down and off, you watch as he preps himself with the rubber, your own hand coming up in a trance to stroke his gorgeous length lightly, his palms ghosting over your hand at the feeling. Once he decides he can’t take it anymore he’s grabbing both your wrists to pin them beside your head in one swift motion, earning a gasp from you at the abruptness. 

“I’m gonna put the tip in first, let you adjust before I go in further,” he explains as he uses his knee to push your thighs apart to grant him more access. “I’m gonna listen to you throughout, okay? Just say so if you want me to stop, I’ll hear you.” 

When you don’t reply he continues, “I need to know you heard me, baby.” 

“I heard you,” you answer, and he finally lets go of one of your hands to guide his length to your entrance, gathering your remaining arousal. He’s sliding his tip across your folds, grinding onto your clit within his length and it has you nearly careening off the edge. 

“Mingyu, in, please!” you beg, and you hear him chuckle before he’s finally pressing the tip into your prepped hole. 

You almost breathe a sigh of relief as you feel him begin to push into your hot core, keeping his promise of only getting to the tip, before bringing himself out and going back in. He’s slow as he stretches you out, his hands coming up to the sides of your head as he tucks his face into the crook of your neck. Lifting one of your legs, you wrap them around his waist as you grant him further access into you, one of his hands coming up to keep your raised leg steady. 

He halts when he finally bottoms out, pausing for breath. “You okay?”

“Yeah, just,” you manage, arms wrapped around his shoulders tight. “Give me a second.” 

When you give him the green light and he begins to move out slowly, only to thrust back in, you find yourself settling into the sheets more consciously, ready to take what he was about to finally give you. You’re both a mess of whimpers and sounds, the feeling overtaking any shreds of restraint you had left. His hands are groping you everywhere, his fingers finding your breasts again as he begins to toy with your nipples, all while thrusting into you at a steady yet equally maddening pace.

He feels amazing, beyond just his dick. The feeling of his body pressed against yours is heavenly, the tears beginning to slowly prick at your eyes as you let yourself melt into his hold, a metaphorical layer away from morphing into his skin entirely. The sounds he’s making are pure melodies, the groans, grunts and heavy moans floating around in your otherwise empty head like they’d never ever leave. They do more when they encourage the building feeling in your abdomen, your moans growing increasingly erratic. 

If the bed is creaking from his incessant thrusting, you don’t hear it. The only thing ringing in your head being the near closure you’re about to receive from him. “Gyu, I’m…”

“Shit, me too.” he grunts, and you believe him as his movements begin to grow sloppier, his hips slamming into yours with more force than before. 

And then it’s bliss, the feeling dropping in on your body as you feel yourself begin to spasm in his hold, the loudest moan ripping from your throat at the sensation. You’re contracting around him so, so good, and it’s enough to have him moaning into your own ear as he feels his climax come over him as well. 

He’s shooting his load into the rubber, and for a wild moment you wish he’d rip it off and finish inside you instead, your blabbering brain wanting to take all of him in. The fever passes in a few heavy minutes, Mingyu’s body is dropped on top of you, his length remaining inside your warmth as you both relished in the post sex haze. 

He’s first to pick his sweltering body off of yours, the cool air hitting your skin as he pulls out of you slowly. You’re still trying to come to earth, even when you hear the water beginning to run in the attached bathroom, even when he walks out in a fresh pair of boxers, walking over to your form on the bed. 

His fingers run through your hair as he places soft kisses on your temple, coaxing you to open your eyes. “Come on babe. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

When you make no moves to get up despite opening your eyes, he’s physically pulling you up to grace your head on his chest in an effort to take a step back into the world. His fingers continue to thread through your hair, massaging your head lightly as you breathe in his scent. You do end up getting up and letting him lead you to the bathroom, but only after he threatens to carry you there over his shoulder. The bath is already drawn when you dip your feet into the warm water, planting yourself inside as you lean against the walls of the tub.

“Gyu, why is it warm?” you whine, wanting a cooler temperature to hit your sticky body. 

He chuckles as he sits by the tub, hands coming in to wet your hair for you, “I’m scared your body’s gonna go into shock if I chucked you into a cold bath. You’ll feel better in a minute, love.” 

You don’t argue as he does most of the work for you, shampooing, scrubbing and conditioning. He lets you sit in the tub for a little bit as he leaves to get you a towel and a shirt, coming back to continue coaxing you to leave the tub this time. You grab his outstretched hand, pulling him down to sit next to you again. 

“Sit with me for a little bit, right here,” you say as you lean over the edge of the tub. 

“I can sit with you in bed once you’re dried up,” he tries to reason. “Under the covers. Where it’s more comfortable than hard acrylic, remember?” 

Pouting a little, you let him wrap you in a towel as you admit defeat, too tired to argue much more than that. He continues to shrug one of shirts over your shoulders, going as far as drying your hair before finally letting you crawl back under the covers. He joins you soon after, wrapping his limbs around you in a tight embrace, breathing in the mix of his own shampoo and your scent. 

“Are you okay? Did I do too much?” he asks quietly.

“Mhm,” you hum into his chest. “I’m okay.”

There’s a deep vibration in his chest as he finds your lack of response amusing, looking at your face that looks about three seconds away from slipping into dreamland. Nearly, he realizes, as your eyes are suddenly pushed wide open, a gasp leaving your throat. 

“What? What?” Mingyu asks as you sit up all of a sudden scrambling to find your phone. 

“My phone, where is it?” you ask as you ruffle through the covers. 

“Did you bring it with you?” 

You suddenly remember your bag that you threw in his entryway a couple hours ago, your phone nestled inside. Swinging your legs over the edge of the bed, you attempt to stand up to retrieve it, only to find out the universe wasn’t about to let you do that. You don’t miss Mingyu’s chortle as he watches you nearly fall over after wobbling around like a fawn, your arms trembling as you pull yourself up back on the bed. 

“What the fuck?” you breathe out. 

“Get back on, I’ll get your bag for you.” He’s still smiling when returns, throwing your purse on the bed. 

You immediately unlock your phone to find Nayeon’s contact, choosing to leave her a text considering the late hour.

“What is it?” Mingyu asks again as he watches you type, arms coming up from behind to engulf you in his hold again. 

“I told Seokmin I was at Nayeon’s. He didn’t believe me but I’m telling her to cover for me anyway.” 

“Oh.”

The thought comes to you later than it should have, realizing you’d have to involve Seokmin in…whatever this was, sooner or later. 

“Don’t,” you hear Mingyu say behind you.

“What?”

“Don’t. I know what you’re thinking about. We can deal with Seokmin when we need to, don’t think about it right now, that’s my job.” 

“I-”

“He needs to deal with me being serious about you,” he continues, giggling, “Even if I have to make you run away with me.”

“Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.” 

He brings your wrist up to his mouth, placing a kiss there, “It won’t. I promise.” 

The sitting up thing doesn’t last for too long, both of you wanting nothing more than to lay down for the lack of energy. Limbs are a tangled mess as you both lay in silence, tired but not wanting to go to sleep just yet. It stays that way for a while, head on his chest as you take in the aftermath of everything that’s happened. 

You just had sex with Kim Mingyu. He loves you back. And you know he means it. This isn’t a hyperrealistic childhood fantasy, this is real life. You’re touching him, he’s holding you, you can hear his heart beat, you can feel his skin under the palm of your hand. 

You’re distracted from your thoughts as you sense Mingyu reaching over the edge of the bed to his nightstand as he looks for something, bringing his hand over to show you a very familiar pink cover in his hands. 

“Oh,” you let out as you recognize the title, snorting as you remember where the verdict for that ended, “We were supposed to talk about the ending.”

“We could do that right now.”

“Uh, about that,” you say. “I never actually got to finish it.”

“You were supposed to be done like two weeks ago,” he frowns.

“I didn’t get to finish it the day…the day you came over. Couldn’t bring it in myself to touch it after that.” you say as you note the little tabs sticking out the sides, wanting to address them. 

“You can use this one to finish it then, it’s yours.” 

You glance up at him as he talks, opening the book to skim through the pages. And then you see it, tiny scribbles on margins, sticky notes at chapter ends with his thoughts, colorful tabs sticking out of every highlighted line, everything complete with a color coded key in the front.

“I saw you do it with your other books, found out it’s not actually a crime to write in books and…I guess it became fun.” he explains as he watches you flick through the pages. “I was gonna give this to you at some point. Sounded like a thoughtful idea in my head.”

You don’t answer him, simply facing him in silence before continuing, “I would’ve been sucking your dick right now if I wasn’t so tired.”

He throws his head back in a loud laugh, the high pitched noise sounding across the room as he nearly curls up from the hilarity. You don’t think it was that funny, but maybe it’s because you were telling the truth. You’re pretty sure you’ve joked about wanting to do that to someone who’d do something like this for you, perhaps you could find the transcripts hidden in some text messages with Nayeon later to show Mingyu.

 His laughter is contagious regardless, giggles of your own coming out as you watch him practically lose it. 

“I think you need to go to sleep,” you comment through bouts of laughter. 

He sighs a vocal sigh as he calms down slowly, agreeing with your suggestion that the near morning delirium was getting to both of your heads. You rest your newly acquired, yet equally prized possession to the side, finally turning in for the night as he reaches to turn his night lamp off. 

Mingyu moves to press his forehead into yours, not before placing a tiny peck into your lips as he mumbles against them in the dark, “I love you.”

“I love you,” you hum back as you press your lips together one last time, finally letting his breathing lull you into sleep. 

The mattress is foreign, so is the pillow, and so are the scents that linger in the room. It’s colder than you’d usually have it and the blankets feel different on your skin. And despite the most foreign thing in the room, the one that has his arms and legs wrapped around you, the one that whispered his love for you into your skin before drifting off, you find yourself falling into a sleep that’s more blissful than any you’ve had in a very, very long time. 

The sun is doing nothing to help itself against the tide of annoyance tht rises in your sleepy state. You’d get up and yank the curtains but can’t bring yourself to have the motivation to leave the soft mattress, simply bunching the blanket up to your face to block out the remnants of sun rays that invade the room. You’ve nearly lulled yourself back to sleep when you start registering noises coming from outside the bedroom walls, muffled yet familiar. 

Your brother is talking about something you can’t make out, Seokmin’s voice is undeniable despite passing through the folded layers of comforters around your head. You don’t doubt the presence of the sweat that’s probably already accumulated on your scalp. 

 There’s nothing that alarms you in the moment despite Seokmin’s yapping — that is until you hear a second voice.

You recognize it immediately as the sound of Mingyu’s talking, the words equally as muffled yet the intonation clear all the same. 

Kicking the sheets off of your overheating body, you squint as you open your eyes in a desperate attempt to reign yourself back to earth, recollections of the past twenty four hours hurtling back to you like a constant line of K.O’s. 

The gallery, the picture, the drive up to Mingyu’s place,the sex, the falling asleep in his arms. You sit up in Mingyu’s bed, clad in nothing but his own T-shirt as you realize your brother is downstairs talking to Mingyu, and you have no idea if he knows you're here. 

You realize very quickly that you’re trapped, being left with no other option than to remain in Mingyu’s bedroom until he comes back up to give you the clear, despite wanting to walk out to take the tiniest peek. You’re not sure what’s worse, getting caught or sitting in the growing pool of anxiety before Mingyu gets back. 

It’s a long, long twenty minutes, in which you’ve done just about everything to get to hear their conversation a bit better; or to distract yourself from the fact that it’s happening at all. Pressing your ear to the door before going back to make the bed. Freshening up in the bathroom before going back to jamming your eye into the keyhole (you aren’t sure why considering door faces a plain wall). You even hijacked a spare cup Mingyu had lying around the room to stick into the wall, hoping all those Mr. Bean cartoons hadn’t been lying to you. 

They were simply talking in a tone too low for your ears to catch (despite the Mr. Bean hack), and you resorted to scrolling on your phone to pass the remaining time. It’s catastrophic to say the least, when you’re met with a string of frantic messages from Nayeon as well as a couple missed calls from your brother. 

[Nayeon]: fuck [Nayeon]: i didnt see this [Nayeon]: he called this morning asking about you  [Nayeon]: i accidentally told him you werent here [Nayeon]: im so sorry where are you  [You]: its okay its my fault for texting so late [You]: i was at mingyus place [You]: ill tell you more later [Nayeon]: WHAT???

By the time Mingyu walks in, he’s mildly surprised to see you awake, pausing at the door as he takes in your huddled form. You sit up immediately, noting his still messy hair and the backwards sweatshirt he’s thrown on over his boxers. The question tumbles out of your lips before you can help it, “Was that Seokmin?”

“Good morning to you too,” he grumbles sarcastically, coming up on the bed to join you in your huddle fest. You’re a little embarrassed at the way you’ve greeted him first thing when he sees you, but his expression when he continues replaces it with something akin to fear. “And yeah, it was him.”

You want to ask him a follow up question, but you aren’t sure what to say, simply staring at him, hoping he’d get the hint and continue by himself. He does. 

“The idiot has a spare key so he just…” He trails off, rubbing his hands on his face,  “he just walked in straight to the room. Got the shock of his life, I suppose, ‘cause it woke me up while you kept snoring.” 

“He walked into the room?!” you nearly screech, hand clamped over mouth, horrified. “What did he say to you?”

Mingyu has the audacity to laugh, simply tugging you back down on the bed to hold you. You briefly wonder how he’s so casual about this. “There’s not really an expected reaction from someone when they find you half naked in bed with their sister.” 

The haphazardly shoved sweatshirt and no pants look was starting to make sense. “I heard you talking downstairs, what were you talking about?” 

“Nothing you have to worry your pretty little head about,” his lips graze the shell of your ear as he snuggles further into you. “He wants you home by seven though.” 

You throw your head back in a whine, “God, what am I gonna do?” 

“You’ll be fine, he didn’t smack me, he can’t possibly be that mad at you.” 

“What was he then, ecstatic?” you retort. 

“I mean,” his energy shifts a little. “I think he’s just a little hurt that he wasn’t told.” 

“So you’ve done your damage control and now I need to pray he doesn’t disown me.” 

“God, you’re being so negative,” he comments and you can’t help but round up on him.

“And you’re acting like you don’t care!”

He’s planting a fat kiss on your cheek at your outburst, coming in to coddle you even more. “I’m kidding, I just want you to relax, don’t be upset.” 

“Has he given you his verdict yet?” you ask quietly.

He sighs at the question and you can’t imagine his answer being any good. “Not yet, pretty up in the air about it.” 

When he sees you deflate even more in his arms, he continues, “I’m sure he’s gonna come around, he loves you too much to not. It’s just a matter of time while he gets to make sense of the situation, don’t worry about it.” 

“I hope so,” you reply.

“We might have wash his socks for the next five years once he does, but it’s okay.” 

You can’t help but snort at the prospect, “His feet are stinkier than the regular human’s, are you sure about that?”

He grins, “I’d do it for you.”

You push his face away, rolling your eyes at his attempt to be sappy. “You’re gonna keep me for five years?” 

His smile drops as you feel the atmosphere shift in the slightest, his presence moving impossibly closer to you. “I’m gonna keep you forever.”

Hearing it is enough to have you lurching forward, closing the final gap between you so you can give in to the urge to kiss him. He’s enthusiastic to give back, pulling your body to face him entirely as you mumble between kisses, “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

The rest of the day (once your anxiety’s calmed down, at least) is spent loitering around each other as you migrate around the house in random excess. He makes you breakfast, and you need to physically restrain him to stop feeding you every bite of pancake and bacon. You let him make your favourite for lunch though, after you finally admitted how much you truly liked his Chow Mein, going as far as to run to the store to grab the stuff he was missing. He returns with a bag of groceries, not missing an abnormal amount of moonpie value packs that he stashes in his cabinets because “you’re gonna be around all the time”. 

6:30 rolls around quicker than either of you would have liked, needing to wiggle out of Mingyu’s hold on his couch to change out of your half naked state. He continues to delay you another ten minutes as he refuses to open his car door to let you walk into the apartment building, leaning over the console to continue mumbling whines between your own consoling kisses. 

By the time you’re making the walk of shame up to your door, the pit of anxiety that began to brew this morning returns from its dormancy, no Mingyu here to help ease your nerves, Gripping your key tight in your hands, you brace yourself to jam and twist to finally end this matter once and for all (at least you hope you can). 

Seokmin is waiting on the couch for arrival like a parent waiting to catch their child in the act. He briefly glances over at you as you whisper a tame “Hi”, slipping off your shoes. He doesn’t reply as he merely grabs the remote to pause his show, casting a heightened awkward atmosphere at the silence that’s now engulfing the room. You tread carefully over to the couch, where Seokmin sits with his arms crossed. 

It takes one look at his face for you to suddenly want to get on your knees and beg for forgiveness. He didn’t look angry, and perhaps you would’ve preferred his aggression if it didn’t mean having to look at a hurt Seokmin. You sit in silence for a couple dramatic minutes, hoping he would start talking so you wouldn’t have to. Yet, when you realize you might have to say something anyway for fear of crushing under the pressure, you find yourself opening your mouth. 

“Are you upset?” Of course, he’s upset, you idiot.

“I just–” he starts, before sighing. “I just wish one of you would’ve told me what was going on.” 

“I know, I’m sorry,” you reply. “I didn’t want either of you to have an excuse to be upset with each other, so I just…”

“I get that it was a recent thing but I think I deserved as much to know what was happening when I wasn’t around.”

You wince as speaks, realizing he hasn’t caught on to the fact that this isn’t recent at all — for you at least. “Um, about that…”

“What? There’s more?” he scoffs. 

“I, uh…I’ve liked him since like fifth grade—” He’s immediately jaw dropped, eyes bulged, taking a sharp breath. “But! In my defense, it was really obvious—it’s honestly your fault for not noticing.”

‘My–My fault?!” he sputters. “That’s like, forever, and you told me nothing? Mingyu told me this was recent, why did he lie?” 

“He didn’t, nothing happened till last night, I swear.” You cringe at what you’re entailing. “It was just me that liked him for that long, he figured it out pretty early on but…”

“He’s finally reciprocating now?” he suggests, almost sarcastically. 

“Yeah,” you breathe out lightly. 

“This is insane,” he blows out a breath of air, massaging his temples. 

“I’m not being stupid about him,” you mutter lowly, “This isn’t some puppy dog crush, especially not after so long.” 

He’s silent. 

“I’m telling you this because I don’t want you to think I’m jumping into this blind, especially for what it means for you too.” 

No response. 

“I’m sorry that you had to find out like this, it’s really not how I wanted it to go.” And when you’re met with even more silence, you find yourself continuing. “Please, talk to me. Cuss me out if you want, I’d honestly rather you yell at me.”

Seokmin sighs for the near hundredth time, finally looking like he might say something. “I want you to listen to me very carefully.”  

The hairs on the back of your neck stand up, mind immediately going to the worst. Was he going to ask you to break up with him?

“I’m gonna choose to trust the both of you on this,” he starts, and you nearly melt into the cushions, “It’s your life, you can date whoever you want. And…I guess Mingyu is better than someone else. Probably uses bad hair gel though.” 

You’re catapulting yourself off the couch at the sound of that, throwing yourself onto an unassuming Seokmin. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” 

“OW! Okay! Geez, get off,” he grumbles as he finally stops wrestling you to let go of him, hugging you back as you squeeze his shoulders tight. 

“I promise I won’t keep anything like this from you again.” 

“You better not,” he huffs as you let go of him, “Don’t think this means you’re forgiven. You still have a lot to tell me.” 

“I promise I won’t leave out a thing.”

The following weeks are near bliss, following your very loud confrontation with Nayeon when she gets back from her summer vacation, her screams at every plot turn having you praying for her neighbors. You doubt she believed you despite everything, not until she physically sees Mingyu come in one day, making a beeline to peck you on the lips before greeting anyone else. Her dropped jaw was very telling. 

Even now, as Mingyu sports the title of the lame alumnus that still hangs around campus as he grips your hand, walking through the grass, the double takes you’re receiving seem to be traveling quite fast. You wouldn’t necessarily blame them considering the trickier than usual dynamic you sport due to your brother (and you guess due to his reputation as well). 

But you also knew they’d be quick to die out as the newer batches of students come flying in — Mingyu will soon become a very well kept secret, in one way if not the other. 

His neighbors, however, must be wishing he had the same sentiment as well, considering the absolutely foul noises that are coming from his apartment. 

You’re learning very quickly that Mingyu’s innocent touchiness can turn into something of the opposite at any given time, exhibit A being now as you try your damn hardest to muffle the sounds coming out of your mouth as Mingyu works his own mouth on your cunt. The knees over his shoulders are shivering from the expense, fingers pumping into your hole as he rubbed a particular spot with his tongue that had you gripping onto his hair tight. 

As much as Mingyu loves to hear you, you find his other hand being brought up to place two fingers in your mouth for you as the perfect pacifier, sounds limiting extensively. 

By the time you’re coming undone, sprawled on his couch like you just ran a marathon, you’re quick to realize that he has no intention of letting you have a breather. It takes one shove for him to pull his pulsing length out of his pants, tip pushing into your still sopping hole as he invited all of him inside you. 

You’ll never forget the first time Mingyu fucked you raw, right after you told him he had the green light after taking your birth control pills. It was magic, you’ve never seen him this vocal as he finished inside you nearly four times in a single night. His moans remain loud even still, as he brings your thighs to press over your chest, basically folding you in half. The mere sound of your wetness as he pumps in and out of you is enough to have you nearly careening over the edge, especially when you feel a desperate hand reach out to rub fast circles on your clit. 

You throw your head back as you cum for the second time, pulsing around him in a grip Mingyu can’t believe has the ability to become tighter. It’s enough for him though, as he leans his forehead against your chest as he releases himself inside you. 

He doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of it, watching you filled to the brim with his cum, even as it drips onto the blankets you’ve laid down below. He has half a mind to stuff the liquid back inside you, but fears you’re tired enough, the overstimulation too much for you. 

By the time you’ve cleaned up and resumed the movie you should’ve been done with hours ago, cuddled impossibly close to him, you find yourself remembering something quite out of the blue.

“Hey, not that I really care anymore,” you start, “But who were the guys you were talking to that day? From the party.”

“Stopped hanging out with them ages ago,” Mingyu scoffs, face souring at the mention of them. “I mean, it was me who said all that bullshit, but they weren’t exactly good influences either. Learned that pretty quick.”

“Oh,” you reply simply, letting your head fall back onto his chest.

He doesn’t seem to be having any of it, grabbing your chin to have you face him. “I’m still really sorry about that. I don’t care if you chase my tail for another fifty years, it’ll always be adorable.”

“Forgave you a long time ago, but I think I have a condition now.” 

He quirks a brow at your words. “What does her Highness ask of me?”

“That you chase my tail for another fifteen to make up for all the running I’ve done.” 

He’s laughing at that, agreeing to your condition as places loving smooches all over your face. “Consider it done.”

It’s later on in the night, both of you huddled in ratty hoodies and mismatched slippers, plastic bag crinkling along Mingyu’s arm as you giggle about something he said. You’re enjoying your fudgsicle in the peace and serenity of the 1 AM hour, making your trek home after raiding the corner store down the block. Mingyu suddenly halts in his tracks as he sees a particularly pretty set of flowers, illuminated by the fluorescent street lights. 

“Babe, babe, stand here let me take a picture of you.”

“What?” you frown, holding up your stick of iced chocolate. “I’m not done yet.”

You watch as he grabs the melting popsicle from your hand downing the entire thing in one go as you watch him, hand still outstretched and jaw dropped. “Mingyu, you bitch!”

He only smiles as he mulls the chocolate in his mouth, words basically gibberish, “‘ere’s more in the ba’, now go stan'!” 

You huff as you trudge to where he was asking you to pose, throwing a couple peace signs to satiate the home video urges in him so you could rip open your second fudgsicle. 

“Wait! You got a little chocolate on your mouth.” he announces, and you stick your tongue out to lick past the remnants of the sweetness. “No— wait.”

He walks over to you as your still trying to find the spot you missed, unassuming as he swings into your face to kiss the remaining off. “Oh, nevermind, it was nothing.” 

You push him off as heat crawls up your face, feigning annoyance at his antics. You decide to forgive him when rips open another fudgsicle for you, offering it with both hands, promising to not steal a single lick. You believe him, snatching the stick from him as you continue your trek home. 

It’s not until he’s attempting to send you the pictures he just took to your phone so you could post them (which, with the way you looked, fat chance) that he notices something in your albums. 

“Oh, are these grad photos?” he asks as he clicks the album open.

“Mhm,” you hum not paying too much attention as you walked and ate. 

“Why’s there only one picture here?” he asks as he pulls up to find nothing more left to load. 

It’s only then that you bring your full attention to your phone in his hand as you realize what picture he’s talking about, “Oh god, don’t look at that one.”

He does the obvious thing and opens it anyway, a louder than necessary “aw” coming out his mouth. “Why do you look like I’m about to eat you?” 

“It felt like it!” you whine, remembering the moment clear as day. “They kept pestering me to take a picture with you too, I was tryna book it out of there at first chance.” 

He giggles as he zooms into the photo, “I’m sending this to myself.”

You groan loudly at the thought, “God, just delete it, leave it alone.”

He tucks the phone into himself further, not letting you grab it. “No, you’re not deleting it. Why do you have it tucked into a separate folder if you hate it so much.”

He’s got you there, you realize quickly, and he reigns in his victory as he watches you grimace at the phone slightly, adding on, “it has a lot of feelings attached to it, I get it. But look, we can attach new feelings to it, now you’ll think about right now the next time you see it.”

“Think about you hijacking my fudgsicles? I think I prefer heartbreak,” you say, bringing your half eaten pop closer to your body in case he tries anything. 

You’re deemed correct when he replies, motioning towards your concealed treat, “Careful, I can still pounce when you’re not looking.” 

Shoving your hands into the swinging bag hanging on Mingyu’s arm, you bring out a thing of sausage and shove it towards him, “You leave me and my fudgsicle alone, go be lousy and suck on this or whatever.”

“You’d know alot about that, wouldn’t you?” he notes casually, grabbing the sausage anyway as he unwraps it to take a bite. 

It takes you a second to realize what he’s talking about while he stares at you with a mischievous expression, coming to shove him when the innuendo finally registers in your head. You do the opposite this time, pointing the melting chocolate toward him instead, threatening to smear it all over his white hoodie. 

He laughs at the sight, disarming you by simply moving your wrist away, coming to kiss you on the mouth hard regardless of your annoyed expression. 

“Love ya’” he giggles. 

“Hm.”

“What, hm? Say it back.”

You pretend to wonder, “I don’t think so.”

“Say it!” he groans, “Say it, say it!” 

You manage to wriggle out of his hold, booking it before he realises what’s happening. 

“Hey!” 

Your both probably waking up the entire neighborhood with how loud you’re yelling and laughing, and even when he manages to tackle you down on somebody’s lawn, coaxing the words out of you with borderline violence, you still manage to smile, thanking your lucky stars that you got what you wanted after all. 

“What’re you thinking about?” he asks with an undertone. 

“Thanking my stars they led me to you,” you reply. 

“More like the other way around. Needed the fattest fucking star to realize what was in front of me all along,” he jests himself. 

It sparks a laugh out of you. “I love you.”

“And I love you.”

[loserlvrss]

꒰ 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐍 𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ꒱ 명재현

summary : jaehyun somehow convinced you to take him to the supermarket with you, and it made you realize something

genre : fluff, slight angst (?), myungjae x afab!reader, drabble, established relationship tws : pet names, food, mentions of anxiety, kissing author notes : suchhh a whore for domestic fluff word count : 1.5k

you should've known it was a mistake to take your puppy-like boyfriend to the crowded supermarket with you. you knew he'd be bouncing all over the place, asking if you two could get this and that, but you couldn't say no to him; he had puppy-dog eyes after all.

you don’t even know how he convinced you to let him ride along with you, hands clutched the entire time as the bus bumped and jumped. you vaguely remember between fast pecks in the doorway, him spewing out being an extra pair of hands, but you knew it was just because he couldn’t spend a moment of his free-days without you.

contrary to prior belief, jaehyun stood behind you, mostly because he didn’t like people having the opportunity to get too close, as you eyed the various fruits. you swiveled your head, asking if he wanted anything in particular for tonight — reveling in his calmness and security.

he grinned, “strawberries.”

you nodded absentmindedly, picking up a package of pink berries and placing them in the basket your boyfriend had offered (demanded) to carry for you. he pretended as if he was a spy, protecting you from the enemies, as he called them; aka the other people just trying to grocery shop. and you pretended as if you didn’t notice, falling a little more in love each time he’d grip your side, or hand, protectively.

“jae, baby,” he hummed, coming to his senses, “do you want anything else while we’re right here? i don’t feel like coming back once you’ve realized you want apples or something.”

he pouted, “i know you would, though.” and he wasn’t wrong, the moment he looked at you with sweet eyes (evidently) you give in.

still you fronted the opposite, “no,” you turned your nose up playfully, “i’d make you go get them by yourself.”

he made an offended sound, hand coming to rest on his chest to emphasize his actions. soon, however, they morphed into a giggle, a cute smile plastering his face, which wasn’t even that far away from yours in that exact moment.

you thought it must’ve been gross, the pda, displayed for all the passerby’s to see. but as you looked at jaehyun, who had nothing but hearts in his eyes for you, you felt inclined to stay like that for at least a little while — you didn’t though, backing away slightly to return to what you needed to be doing instead.

“and, do we need more rice? i can’t remember.”

he tisked, “should’ve made a list, y/n. i would’ve made a list.” you knew well that he was only joking, because your boyfriend of all people would never make a list unless told to do so. you rolled your eyes, letting him continue, “but if we don’t, you can just store it right? it’s not too hard, is it?”

you looked to the various things in your basket already: green onions, garlic, cabbage, carrots, lettuce and strawberries. you remembered vaguely what you came here for, and you knew that if jaehyun wasn’t gracing your presence you’d probably be done by now (walking fast due to the anxiety). but despite that, you honestly wouldn’t have today play out any other way.

“i guess you’re right. i usually do that anyways.” he picked up a package of individually portioned rice. “just get those for now, i’ll buy bulk later when i remember.”

jaehyun could tell, like you were a picture book, that you were feeling a little uncomfortable being surrounded by so many people. you usually went to the store closer to closing, or on days when nobody would necessarily be around due to work conflicts. you usually bought in bulk so that it was only a once a month kind of thing, but when he saw you were running low on food he encouraged you (because you need to eat) to go grocery shopping, and that’s how you ended up in the grains isle.

you adjusted the empty basket on your arm, opposite of jaehyun’s, and took his hand. he gladly accepted the way you maneuvered you both from the isle and over by the drinks, which was relatively empty — for now.

he set his own basket on the floor, taking yours gently from your elbow and putting it next to the other. his face had a slight pout, and when his hands placed against your waist, yours mirrored the expression.

“coke zero?” you whispered out, “or sprite? or…”

he kept his gaze on you, before pulling you into a tight hug. the moment your chests hit, you inhaled his bright scent. you never could pinpoint exactly what it was, but every time you smelled something remotely close you were reminded of your boyfriend — who, obviously, cares so deeply for you.

you patted his should, in a way of telling him to let go, because you were a little embarrassed that anyone could see such as intimate moment if they turned down the isle. you loved him, you did, but he was a little impulsive when it came to you and yours needs; or what he thought those were.

before he completely pulled away, he snuck a peck against your lips, causing you to giggle in surprise. you continued laughing as he went to pick up the baskets, as if nothing happened.

“what was that for?”

“what was what for?” he asked, an innocent look meeting your eyes. you always found him puppy-like — everyone did — but right now especially. “how about coke zero, babe?”

you scoffed, “sure, myung, whatever you want.”

he stopped his actions, only halfway done taking the soda off the shelf. he turned back to you, approaching his a stupid-little grin on his lips. your eyes narrowed, but you knew you couldn’t back away, “well, in that case,” his palms touched your cheeks gently, before his lips once again pressed to yours (less urgently this time). you started laughing again, trying to push him off, still embarrassed of your boyfriends shameless actions. you thought this had to be public indecency, that he’d been watching too many dramas — picking up useless real-word tips and tricks — but you had to admit, you were feeling that anxious anymore.

you knew jaehyun always had a way to make you feel better; wether that be embarrassing himself to make you laugh, or holding you close. you knew he’d do just about anything to see you smile. and that he did, pulling away and watching your lips crease up. he thought you looked most beautiful smiling, practically shooting hearts from his eyes.

“jaehyun,” you swatted at him, “stop, this is a public establishment. don’t just kiss me in front of people like that… it’s embarrassing.”

he pretended to be offended, although knowing exactly what you meant, “you’re embarrassed? of me?” you rolled your eyes, knowing this was only the calm before the storm; jaehyun didn’t care about embarrassing himself, taking you as collateral. “you’re seriously embarrassed of kissing me? my girlfriend, embarrassed… oh my god.” he was once again pouting, “i don’t know how you’re going to make this up to me, y/n, I’m so hurt right now.”

you took the coke off the shelf, putting it in your empty basket, “let’s hurry up and i’ll give you a kiss at home, okay?”

he turned his nose up, blocking you, “just one? that’s not going to be enough to forgive you. you rejected me, hurt my pride, my ego — my girlfriend —“

“as many as you want, jae,” you looked to your side, sensing the few people who had stumbled upon you and your (fake) sulking boyfriend, “people are staring, let’s go, please.”

and that’s was his cue. he’d never do anything to make you uncomfortable. he knew that nobody was in the isle when he kissed you, being attentively aware, but now that there was, he couldn’t take it any further.

he cheered up, causing you to laugh in disbelief once again. you watched jaehyun pluck the sprite off the shelf too, adding it to the heavier basket — which he took — and then your hand.

you picked up the other basket, catching a glimpse of the older couple at the end of the isle; they didn’t look disgusted by your actions, not even offended. it was more like a look of adoration, an expression of awe at your young love. maybe, you thought, nobody really minded when your boyfriend expressed his feelings for you. hell, when you saw other couples do it, you didn’t even mind. and it’s not like you were making out in front of the soda. he was just trying to cheer you up.

“c’mon, y/n.” he tugged your arm gently, gaining your attention, “we have to watch the last episode of my demon!”

maybe you were too much in your head, instead of focused on what was going on in the present time. in reality, no one truly cared what the two of you did. and, even through the embarrassment, you still liked when jaehyun was impulsive for you. he was your hyperactive boyfriend after all.

“okay…” you sighed out a deep breath, “and i owe you an apology for rejecting your kisses.”

he corrected, “lots of apologies!” before dragging you to check out. you kissed his cheek standing in line, and felt something shift within yourself: maybe you were become more comfortable, or maybe you finally realized that expressing your admiration and love for someone wasn’t embarrassing.

emotions were only human after all.

reblogs, likes and comments are greatly appreciated! thank u!

[summerscribble]

After Work // Artem Wing

tw nsfw, fem read, fem x artem, pregnancy kink, mating press, no protection, penetration, blowjob, mdni

summary last week, when you were drunk, you somewhat shyly brought up to your husband, Artem that you wanna have his kids, and the following morning you couldn't recall anything, Artem had been thinking a lot about that date night, and what your drunk ass said, it is even affecting his work. Tonight, he settles on his pondering and decides to remind you about the words you've forgotten.

Artem has been busier these days, you arrive home early but he decides to stay longer, and you miss doing little chores with him like cooking dinner together or taking a bath together before hopping into bed and then cuddling to sleep, in short, you have been missing your husband a lot lately.

However, he slides into bed late at night when you're already deep asleep, you barely have a short interaction during work hours as you both are working on different cases. It's just those little moments, where you aren't getting any quality time for each other since last week's date night where you ended up consuming a lot of liquor to even remember how you ended up from the restaurant to your bedroom.

You just wanna have him for the weekend so you can take care of your hard-working husband but Artem has been so involved in work. You worry about his health because he still strictly follows his perfect schedule but it is now tiresome in his eyes, he doesn't even talk much during breakfast.

You have learned how to cook lately so it's very efficient for both of you and even a great help during your husband's busy schedule days. The light conversation you only get to have with him is in the morning which also gets interrupted by any of his urgent calls.

"Are you leaving early?" You ask when he pours juice into your glass.

He gives a small smile, "I have to."

"Artem…" You hold his arm gently, "I'm worried about you. I want to help you with this case."

There's a reflection of pain in his eyes, "I'm so sorry sweetheart. I didn't mean to stress you out. There was this misleading evidence I had to look into on an urgent basis. We are going to wrap up most of the stuff today. I will be coming home tonight on time."

"Please, let me know if you want any help, Artem." You worryingly stroke on his hand.

He places a soft kiss on your lips, "Of course."

Artem leaves for work early again, he is indeed busy with work these days but the main thing that kept distracting him from doing his work correctly was the conversation he had with you a week back when you both were having a date at a restaurant and by the end of the night you both were tipsy. While getting into an Uber he remembers you whispered in his ear, "Artem, I wanna become a mother."

That immediately flushed his face and he looked back at you. You were more than tipsy. He searched for any seriousness on your face but you remained smiling at him. It's not like you guys never had this conversation about becoming parents, it was just too sudden for now.

He asked, "You wanna have children?"

You nod hugging him, "I want a little artem and take him to school and take care of him."

That made him chuckle.

You frowned at him, "Don't you think we should start planning for kids."

He was drunk and not in the right state of mind to have that conversation at that time. He was just getting nervous to even imagine himself as a father figure.

You softly kissed him on the lips that night, "I love you, babe."

It melts his heart every time he hears that. He kissed you back, "I love you more." And now he wanted to keep the promise of giving you the world when he decided to marry the love of his life. Did you want kids? Okay, he is going to learn how to be the best father.

You do not remember much about what happened that night and also don't remember that you told him you wanted to have kids. But it has been always in the back of your head that someday you want to start a family with him. You finished your work early and checked on Artem and he was not in the office. You asked about his whereabouts and you were informed that he was still on sight.

You texted him and he replied that he would be back home soon and cook dinner for you. You rushed back home and started preparing for dinner, you can't let your husband come tired at home and cook for you. Why can't your man understand that you want him to have a little rest lately?

You finished preparing the dinner and were waiting for him but then he texted you he would be late again. That made your mood a little bit gloomy. You had dinner alone, took a bath, and now you were in bed alone.

You stretch your hand to the side where Artem usually sleeps. You sigh cause you miss him. You leave a text but no reply and while waiting for that you fall asleep.

In the middle of the night, you feel a warm palm brushing against your stomach. You feel your husband's warm presence behind you. You stretch your hand to pull him closer, "When did you return?"

You look at the nightstand, the digital clock reads 02:45 AM. "Just a minute ago or something." Artem's deep voice lingers in the darkness near your ear as he pulls your back closer to his chest. A sudden heat rises down your core.

You speak softly, "Artem-"

"Yes baby," He kisses your neck. You let out a soft moan. The cedarwood scent his washed heavily in exhaustion from the long day he must have had.

"You must be tired, Artem." He's still in his work clothes.

"I wrapped up everything and hurried back to you." He leaves a bite on your earlobe. His other hand still rubbing on your stomach and sliding a bit down. You exhale sharply. It's almost been a week since Artem and you had sex. You sense the urgency of need in his movement reflecting something similar to yours.

"Artem… You don't have to tonight--"

He stops, "Are you tired? I can cuddle you to sleep." But his hand says otherwise as it slides up into your t-shirt around your breasts.

"Artem-It's not-" He pinches your nipples. The air almost halts passing down your throat.

"You smell so good, baby," His warm breath touches your cold skin when he buries his nose into your neck, inhaling sharply, "I miss having meals with you, I miss bathing with you." He pulls your body closer filling the depth between your bodies, "I fucking missed you."

Before you could respond he tucks your hair under his finger and attacks your nape with wet kisses, "Baby, I need you." He brushes his growing bulge on your ass.

"I need you too." It trembles you more when he tilts your face to access your lips and before that, you witness a pure hunger of desire in his eyes.

He claims your lips between his and deepens the kiss, fondling and massaging your breasts. You moan in between and feel his lips curling, "Fuck. I missed you more." He slides down and leaves wet kisses on your tits. You brush your fingers into his soft hair. You love when he fucks you in his work clothes. It just does something to you. It crumbles your walls and your husband knows it well.

In seconds he removes your t-shirt and throws it on the floor leaving you naked in your panty. He sits on his knees in between you. His burning stare flames up your skin. You try covering your tits with your hand. His blazing gaze in taking every inch detail of your body, "Baby, you remember? You said last week you want to have kids."

Nothing could have prepared you for hearing, that. It makes your eyes widen in shock, "I-What?"

Artem removes his jacket while responding, "You said it's time we finally have a kid." Your clits believe that's the sweetest thing she has heard. Having kids. Damn, you don't even remember you mentioned it.

"Artem, I don't remember much."

He removes his tie. You love how he's s giving you the best strip show. Cause you have told Artem before for a thousand times how much you love and get turned on seeing him like this. Your hips move and he smiles staring straight into your eyes, "The app we use to track your cycle says you are ovulating, babe."

"Artem-" Your voice hitches when he uncuffs his sleeves and starts rolling up to his elbows.

"Isn't that great? I can impregnate you tonight."

When he catches you not replying to his questions. He leans down, flexing his forearm muscles. Your man is on a mission today.

"Tell me, darling, are you ovulating?"

You don't know how to hide your flushed face, "Maybe, I'm not sure."

When his face is near yours you notice his bare chest visible under his unbuttoned shirt. You trace your fingers over the delicate chain that hung around his neck that you gifted him a few years back.

His hand brushes on your hips, pulling you closer to his center. You breathe hitches and you make a sound.

"I'm gonna ask you for the final time, baby. Do you want me to fuck you raw tonight?" You melt right away. Artem knows what he's doing tonight.

You nod, "Yes I wanna have kids, Artem."

That shifts something in his azure eyes and now they appear to be darker. He pushes his hip against your center, You feel his bulge through his pants.

You moan.

"You want to feel it deep inside, right baby?."

"Artem-"

With that, you hear him unbuckling his belt. It excites you too much and you can feel yourself drenching your panty. You have not been on birth control for a few months now but Artem always uses condoms anyway. It's been months that you have felt him raw.

His stare never leaves yours as he goes down and halts near your cunt, his lips touch your covered clits but it still sends shivers. His other hand glides up to massage your breasts you can feel his cold metal wristwatch and the wedding ring against your skin.

He caresses your clit through your panty. His index and middle finger slowly pull down your panty uncovering your pussy for him. His long fingers touch your sensitive bud and you can't stop holding your cries, "Artem…" Your hips start buckling up.

The desperation in your eyes, makes him catch your desire and even he no longer can control himself. His blood rushes down and he wanna fuck you. He's dying to do that but he's too turned on and might hurt you being too rough. Despite, your loving him and giving you the deepest thrusts but he gotta be human tonight however, he wanna fuck you like an animal in a rut.

He straightens himself on his knees and pulls out your panty while supporting your lifted legs with his other hand. That leaves a soft shrill in your mouth.

He unzips his pants exciting you even more. He loves how your eyes are hungry staring at the bulged form under his brief. He blushes when you bite your lower lips staring at him pulling out his cock.

"Artem, Can I taste it?" That makes his heartbeat knock louder.

Before he could have replied you are already pushing yourself up and sit between in front of him and staring down to access his veiny dick. He doesn't stop you once you start bending. He feels you stroke his dick with your wet tongue. He grips your hair, slowly, "Just a taste baby, cause tonight I wanna cum inside you."

You nod obediently, putting your mouth against his tip, and sucking on it, Artem blood rushes in the direction wherever your tongue trails. It was going to be tough for him to not fuck your mouth. Cause he loves your little skillful mouth. He moans and you take him down your throat. You love how he was looking down at you and gripping your hair. His hips started thrusting but he also started cursing, "Baby, Please stop I wanna be inside you."

But you don't, you want a taste of him and when you almost go to use your hands, he pulls out. It is visible how hard it is for him to do that. His eyes are hungry.

Artem pushes you on your back and lifts your legs, trapping you between his knees and bending you in a mating position. His thick cock penetrates you. You moan loudly feeling your walls stretch, "Artem-Arte-It hurts."

That doesn't stop him from pushing into more, "Baby, Your pussy loves when I'm rough with you." You can't deny it at all.

His pelvis rubs your clits sweetly giving him more access to be deep inside you. He starts thrusting and moaning.

Your hips respond to get in sync. He kisses your lips making you moan. It didn't even take a moment for him to increase the pace and pound inside you faster.

"Artem-"

Every thrust sends you into oblivion.

His cock hits your sweet spot every time, you melt right away. His hand grips your leg to support him in penetrating deeply. He pushes inside you. He loves staring at your bouncy tits, "Fuck, Baby you will have my kids."

"Artem." You moan in response.

Continuous thrusting and his possessive dirty talk about making you pregnant leave your mind numb and flooding with pleasures.

He bends to take your lips between his, "You're gonna look so beautiful baby. With a swollen stomach and tits." With that he bites in your moans, leading you close to your climax.

Your eyes start tearing up as his thrusts keep getting faster.

"I will fuck you till you get pregnant baby."

You almost reached climax hearing that. He looks down between you both and he enjoys how his raw dick enters your moist pussy, "Your pussy is so obedient to me."

His gentlemanly attire makes him look sinister.

"Artem'm coming. Please go harder-"

His hand bends your leg more and he starts pounding more harshly inside you. You cry and he studies your expression, "Cum for me sweetheart."

With that, you shatter down and his pounds chase your orgasm and you clench your cunt around him feeling him coming inside you too. He bites on your throat and leaves a few marks around your neck till his hips forcefully pound inside you. Your hips move in sync against his till he milks you walk. His satisfying grunts surround the air as he fills you up.

You wanna pass out. The after-effects leave you both breathing heavily. He pulls out and stares when you leak his cum. There's something animalistic in his look when he presses his finger around your cunt and pushes inside to make it stop leaking.

"Artem-" You mewl.

"I guess I have to fuck you again, tonight."

[adonis-koo]

sweet nothing • 5

(In which he is most definitely sick)

↳ Description: being a guest at the Jeon Estate after a mishap of being kidnapped and dragged into your brothers affairs isn’t all that bad. Truth be told it brings you a lot closer to the mobster and owner of the estate Jeon Jungkook himself.

His two rules are simple, don’t cause trouble and don’t give him a hard time. Somehow you manage to constantly do both in the most endearing way despite being pregnant and waddling around most of the time.

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/reader, ???/reader

↳ Genre: slice of life AU, mafia!AU, pregnancy, there’s like…a little bit of a plot but not a lot, future smut? maybe? it's very domestic!

Word Count: 2k

Previous | Next

Note: I'm back AGAIN, simply because I can't get enough of these two!!! they're my life line these days tbh! i know I said there wasn't a lot of plot to this BUT....theres definitely some plot if you squint

“Are you sick?” 

Jungkook looked horrendous, it was evident he hadn’t showered yet, as his hair was somewhat oily, wild and unbrushed, his voice was raspy and the moment he greeted you good morning, it was evident he was congested. 

“I don’t get sick.” Jungkook replied, but his voice alone gave away the discomfort he was feeling, he sat at the small table attempting to eat but after two bites and the pure agony of attempting to swallow, he gave up. 

Your lips parted before closing once more, a sigh escaping you, “If only that were the case,” this had been your concern since he had come home late a few days ago, soaked to the bone and freezing cold. 

Yesterday when he had taken you out you noticed he had been sniffling, but aside from that he sounded totally find, today he looks like he had been hit with a car.

Jungkook rolled his eyes, “I have three board meetings today, a stack of paper work in my office that needs to be signed and a deal tonight at the Red Light, I can’t afford to be sick.” 

“Jungkook,” You chastised softly, “Do you even hear yourself? I don’t think anybody is gonna want to be around you when you sound like that. What are your symptoms?” 

“I’m not-”

“Yes you are!” You spoke over him, your expression shifting into anger at his stubbornness, “whether you like it or not! You’re sick. Now tell me so I can figure out whether I need Jimin to call the doctor or not.” 

Jungkook groaned as he leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms in thought before he reluctantly spoke, “My throat feels like it’s on fire. Even speaking feels like I’m swallowing a dagger.”

“And I have a massive headache,” He ushered softly, eyes closing as he rubbed his head.

Your expression softened once more, “Why don’t you go lay down? I’ll call for Jimin to get the doctor and make sure you’re alright,”

“I am alright.” Jungkook replied, puffed up at your words, one glare however shut him up.

He tiredly blinked as he sunk into his seat, “I can’t just take the day off.” 

“Then do what you can from bed.” You said with a frown, “But you’ll make others sick and yourself worse if you go out today.” 

He said nothing got a long moment before he shook his head and got out of his chair, your eyes followed him across the room until he left, somewhat surprised at his lack of argument.

Yeonjun who had been digging through a folder off to the side briefly glanced up to the closed door and then to you, “That’s a first.”

“Pardon?” You asked.

He smiled, “Jungkook letting someone boss him around. It’s a rather nice change of pace.” 

You scratched your cheek, uncertain of how to take the his words, your lack of reply only made Yeonjun continue though, “Y’know he used to..,” He cut himself off, as if realizing it wasn’t his place to meddle, “Sorry, I won’t bring it up. I’m sure neither of you want to dig up the past.”

The past…You gave a sad smile, picking at your food, “It’s alright, there’s nothing to dig up, Jungkook was a nice acquaintance back before I was pregnant, if you could even call him that. Nothing more…Yoongi is his partner, right?”

Yeonjun frowned, looking away warily before he eventually nodded, “You’ve met?”

You shook your head, “Only once, a long time ago, informally might I add.” 

“Do you want me to ring for Jimin?” Yeonjun decided to change the subject, “That way you can finish eating?”

You nodded with a grateful smile, “Yes! That would be quite helpful.” 

Jungkook looked downright annoyed as the doctor poked and prodded at him before he had finally come to a conclusion.

Turning to you as it was evident Jungkook was not in a good mood, “The good news is that it’s only a case of tonsillitis.” 

You sighed in relief before you asked, “Is there bad news?”

“It’s a bacterial infection, so we’ll need to put him on antibiotics. Lots of rest and warm, soft foods will help, he should be better in a few days at most once the antibiotics are in his system.” The doctor gave a warm smile.

“Few days?” Jungkook’s brows pinched together in annoyance.

“I’ll be sure to keep him rested.” You cut over him with a smile, “Thank you Doctor Choi.” 

“Of course Y/n, I will see you on Friday for your check up.” He gave a short bow before existing the room.

“I can’t be in bed for a few days!” Jungkook immediately piped up, though you didn’t miss the slight wince in expression at the obvious pain he was feeling.

“Doctors orders.” You gave him a sweet smile as you held your hands up.

He slumped back, glaring through his bangs at nothing in particular, “Can you at least get my laptop?” 

You let out a noise of amusement as you stood up, one hand on your stomach, the other on your dully aching back, “I didn’t realize having strep throat made your legs not work.” 

“You want me in bed or not?” 

“I’m going, I’m going.” You giggled as you waddled out of the room and into the open space of his office, digging through paperwork you made sure nothing was messed up, before finding his laptop charger and eventually finding the source as well. 

Opening the cracked door to his room however you smiled softly as the sight of him laid back down, knocked out once again, a soft snore even escaping him as you tutted, walking over you set his laptop on his nightstand before tenderly pulling his covers back over his shoulder. 

His expression looked so delicate when he was asleep, lips parted slightly and brows relaxed, tenderly you brushed your fingers through his hair before catching yourself. 

Your hand snapping back to your chest as if it had been burned, swallowing hard you shook your head, you had been thinking about the past a lot more these days. 

You couldn’t help but wonder if Jungkook did the same. 

Frowning you shook your head before you exited his room, there was no point dwelling on the what-if’s after all. 

Most of the day had gone by quietly, there was something different about the estate when Jungkook was home, even if he was sleeping away or working in his room, his energy still filled the air and brought a comforting feeling to whatever you did. 

Eventually the afternoon passed and an idea had overtaken you. 

“What are you doing?” Yeonjun paused at the door as he cocked his head to the side, brimming with curiosity. 

You turned towards Yeonjun with a grin, “You can’t tell Jungkook.”

He sighed, “I hate when you start a sentence with that.” 

You pouted, “I’m making him soup!” 

Yeonjun looked relieved, “Oh…okay, better than I anticipated, it does smell good here.” He glanced around the empty kitchen, “But the kitchen staff are already preparing supper.” 

You crossed your arms once more, “Well, that doesn’t change that I’m making him something to eat. There’s nothing like home cooking when you’re sick!”

Yeonjun held up his hands, “If it’s from you I’m sure he’ll love it….” He shuffled closer before peering over your shoulder, “Will there be extra?” 

“Are you asking for a bowl?” You grinned.

“Only if there’s extra.” 

“There’s plenty.” You replied with an excited smile, giving a little happy dance as you grabbed a set of bowls, proudly pouring your soup before handing one to Yeonjun who looked like a little kid snatching it from your hands. 

Setting the other bowl on a tray you tided it up with a nice hot ginger plum tea and a few napkins, “Tell me how it tastes! I’m gonna run this up to his room.” 

“Don’t you want some?” Yeonjun had already grabbed a spoon, slurping noodles. 

You grimaced, “Honestly the taste of chicken broth makes me wanna vomit, back when I had morning sickness the smell alone had me gagging.” 

“That’s a shame because this is honestly the best soup I’ve ever had- second actually,” Yeonjun smiled at his bowl, “Reminds me of my mom’s when I was sick as a kid.” 

You only smiled at his words before briefly glancing down at your stomach, large and round, you could only hope you’d make the best soup your baby would love one day. 

“Well nothing can beat mom’s soup, hopefully it’ll be second best for Jungkook too.” You laughed a little as you walked past Yeonjun, carefully holding the tray. 

You didn’t know much about Jungkook, truthfully, sure you had talked pre-pregnancy, but it always…you huffed, shaking your head.

This had been happening more frequently, memories of the past would surface and you’d have to shove them back down, the past was the past for a reason. You could only assume they kept coming up because well…

It was Jungkook. 

Knocking on his door you heard a scratchy ‘come in’ before opening the door. 

Jungkook was sat up in bed, looking tired as he typed away on his laptop, eyes dragging towards you before you noticed them brighten just a little. 

His eyes then dropped to the tray before he stiffened, “Why are you carrying that?” 

“I can-” You couldn’t even finish your sentence before Jungkook had already gotten out of bed, swaggering up to you before grabbing the tray. 

“Ask Yeonjun next time.” It was difficult to take his chided words serious when he was rasping this hard, a wince visible on his face as he continued, “If you drop that-” 

“How many times do I have to tell you,” You huffed, “I’m pregnant, not dying.” Your expression softened a little as a small smile tugged on your lips at the sight of his floppy bangs covering his eyes in a sulky manner, “Lay back down, I made you something to sip on. I always loved warm broth when I was younger.” 

Jungkook set the tray on his nightstand as he sat back down at the edge of the bed, staring down at the steaming bowl, his expression nonpulsed for a long moment. 

“You do like soup right?” You shuffled a little nervous at his quietness. 

“Who the fuck doesn’t like soup?” He quipped, “I just…” He glanced away, “You didn’t have to do that…” 

“Of course I did!” You replied immediately, “If I don’t then who will?” 

Jungkook parted his lips before closing them, sighing but not saying anything else as he propped his nightstand up, it extended upwards before turning towards him, he paused before taking a sip, “Well don’t just stand there.” 

You glanced around the room, not much had changed, a few chairs still against the wall, a particular spot open to the wall, opposite to a mirror on the other side of the room hanging. 

“Have you considered redecorating?” You asked as you rounded the bed, choosing to sit beside him on the empty side. 

Groaning you rested your back against the headboard as your hands dropped to your stomach. 

Jungkook shrugged beside you, “Not much reason too. I thought it looked fine.” 

He plopped the spoon in his mouth as his eyes shut. He was never a very expressive person, but there was something about that satisfied look on his face that made you smile.

“It’s alright, it's just…” You trailed off, suddenly feeling as though you weren’t as ready to have this conversation as you thought you were.

“Just what?” Jungkook’s brows furrowed. 

You forced a smile as you shook your head, “Nothing.” 

The same way you last remembered it.

You glanced at the that small open space of the wall between both the chairs, how cold it felt against your back when…

Jungkook could obviously sense the uncomfortable silence, “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“The soup.” 

A somewhat hesitant smile tugged on your lips, “Of course. I’m…” Your smile became disheartened as you stood up, “I’m gonna start preparing for bed, you should get some more rest.” 

Jungkook frowned but said nothing, though it looked like he wanted to, he only nodded. 

You left his room feeling your feet drag as you closed your eyes, this feeling was something you were used to when it came to him.

This feeling of always dancing around one another, never talking about the tension in the room, except now it was even more evident then before. 

You’d have to talk about it eventually. 

I forgot all about my tags last chapter so I apologize!

taglist: @btseverafter7 @scuzmunkie @zae007live @cynicalbitch666 @somehowukook @bartisedrew @princess-sunshyn @jungk-shook-iiee @chickpea-jimin @hoseokteardrop @guk97butterfly @givemethemaknaes16 @bxcndd

[neopuppy]

There’s no denying how hard this year has been, each day feels more and more like a battle. It’s hard to wake up, hard to put a brush through your hair, hard to bother with putting away your laundry. Little things really, they feel meaningless, everything generally feels meaningless.

“Hey, it’s already half past noon and you haven’t eaten anything yet.”

Concern rings between each word, dragging your body to the side to blink your eyes open and peer over to where he stands. There’s those same eyes that droop at the corners, never bright or optimistic anymore. They used to hold a softness, love, adoration, never toward you romantically, but still enough to make you feel special. 

You are special to him though, that’s why he’s concerned. Even when he has to look away, maybe because you remind him too much of her. Of the woman you both loved more than anything, the loss you both continue to suffer from. 

“Not hungry.” You mutter, pulling your blanket on tighter as soft fabric rubs against your hips and sets off warmth between your chest.

He sighs, head knocking on the door frame. “You know, I won’t let you deteriorate, your mom would—“

“Mom’s not here.” You say, cutting him off. A small pang of guilt hits when he nods solemnly, chin tucked to his chest without looking at you again.

“Fine. Have it your way.” Letting go of your door handle, he shrugs and shakes his head. “I’ll leave my card and cash out on the counter if you change your mind and get hungry later. Have to get ready for work, I’ll be home late so don’t.. worry about me.”

You’d be lying if you said you won’t worry. You always worry. Always fear the thought of receiving a late night call that he didn’t make it, that he’s on his deathbed hooked up to life support leaving his fate in your hands. Instead you nod and barely raise your fingers out of your blanket to wave goodbye.

It’s always the same routine when he has these night shifts. Pester you about eating, about getting some fresh air, doing something productive with your free vacation time, just being a damn nuisance you don’t want to deal with. You have to get through it, act like you don’t care too much, keep up a calm facade despite the anxious way your heart begins to race.

It’s been weeks of planning, trying to figure out what it would take to make your sweet nurturing step-father finally snap. 

Jaemin: Swing by to get you tonight around 10?

Yeah. That should be late enough, and from the clues you’ve gathered, you know exactly where to go.

The sound of the shower turning on from the master bedroom alerts your ears, jumping out of bed and into your slippers to tiptoe down the hall and twist your mom’s key through the lock to allow yourself in. It’s lucky you’d found it mixed in with a bunch of her items, making it easy to pocket and hide in case you’d ever need it.

He’s already inside of the shower by the time you’ve rounded the corner and crouched down by the connected bathroom door. It gets steamy, but the glass still clears up enough to take in his long muscular legs, sleek lean back, thick arms curling up to run shampoo through his hair.

It’s different today, having to cover your mouth to hold in your gasp when you spot him leaned back against the wall. His eyes are shut tight, sharp eyebrows furrowed together frustratedly, arm jerking furiously. The fog clears up along the glass with each hit of water, making the view of his large hand stroking up and down his length vividly clear. 

To your surprise, he never brings anyone home. Many would consider him to be a young handsome eligible bachelor still, a good career, attractive face, fit body. You certainly wouldn’t be shocked if he decided to start dating again. The sad truth is you often find your step-father still mourning the loss you both took. He cries through the night, wakes up with swollen eyes and dark circles, he plays it off and puts on a smile for your sake but his pain is evident. 

It’s hard to watch him struggle. The way he pulls on his cock seems painful, writing his internal guilt with each whimper and groan that squeezes from his tucked in lips. He doesn’t want you to hear him, he doesn’t want to experience pleasure through his pain. Doesn't think he deserves it.

You wonder what brought this on, what set him off enough to finally break the silent celibacy pact you assume he’s held himself accountable to. Today’s different from the way he barely touches his cock whenever washing suds off his body, scrubbing himself clean in such a robotic way without any expression. 

Sliding onto your knees, you have to adjust the oversized boxers hanging from your hips, rolling them up tighter to squeeze around your middle. He hasn’t mentioned anything about his underwear going missing yet, hasn’t had the nerve to question you about the different items from his closet that he can’t recall seeing for weeks now. It’d be too weird to suspect his step-daughter of invading his privacy and personal belongings while at work. 

Johnny’s always been too nice to ever think you could do anything wrong. Not you, not with the angelic side of yourself you grace him with. It’s almost too easy messing with him, rolling around on his freshly washed sheets when he leaves for work, spraying his cologne on your pillows to feel closer to him.

He won’t say anything even if he notices a familiar print of his underwear peeking out from your pajama bottoms.

“Shit.” You murmur, pushing back on your legs to inconspicuously crawl your way out before he can exit the bathroom. Too fast to sneak out to take in the evident failure pulling his cheeks down into a frown.

Johnny’s lonely, he’s real lonely, and you can fix that. You want to fix that.

A knock rasps down your door minutes later, halting your hand from traveling past the waistband of your stolen boxers after burrowing back inside of your bed. “I’ll be heading out now, if you need anything I’m only a phone call away.” 

Staying silent for a moment, you decide to get up and listen at the door for his breathing. Keeping your movements light enough to not make the floor creak as you make your way over. His breath comes out evenly, fingers tapping a couple of times along the doorbed before he lets out a quiet sigh and turns to leave. 

It’s better for him to believe that you went back to sleep, lessen any possible suspicion, cover your ass if you ever fuck up and accidentally leave evidence. He’s too good at his job.

The cop car stays parked across the street from your house most days when he’s working a lot, not helping the ongoing joke you hear about how your step-dad does that on purpose to ward away the men who want to date you. For the most part it worked too, living by his rules to focus on your education throughout high school and not waste your time fucking around with teenage boys.

Times have changed though, and with this year long break you both agreed would be best for your mental health, you have gotten bored.

Beyond bored. 

Sneaking over to your window, you watch as he takes one last glance back at the house before getting inside of the car. He’s handsome as ever in that stupid pig uniform, the halster cinching his waist in further really accentuating his build.

Jaemin: Your step-dad’s not roaming the streets tonight by chance? 

Watching his car drive off you reply with an angel emoji, exclaiming how excited you are to get out.

“I’ll see you later Johnny.”

[storytowrite]

Love Untold (OT8 x F! Reader)

Chapter 23

Paring: BangChan x Y/N

Genre: smut

Warnings: 18+, blowjob, overstimulation

Word Count: 3873

Masterlist

Due to the work of your parents, you are forcet to constantly move. However, this time moving houses let to interesting and unusual events. You met 8 handsome boys at school and somehow you managed to move in with them. How will your fate go?

……………………………..

Your parents' text messages were becoming more and more persistent. It was getting harder and harder for you to hide it from the boys. It was becoming increasingly difficult for you to keep your emotions in check. You often locked yourself in your room, covered yourself with a blanket and cried. You felt powerless, you were afraid that you would have to go back to the people who hurt you so much.

And today was just such a day when you felt particularly shitty. Tonight was sleepless and hard. There was a huge confusion in your mind, your parents' messages showed that they were getting closer to finding you. You didn't know who to turn to. Contact with Sebastian seemed too risky since your parents could control him. But you also didn't want to bother any of the boys. After all, they had enough of their own problems.

You looked lazily at your phone, it was 2 p.m. You decided it was the right time to finally get out of bed and leave the room where you had been staying for several days. You put on some stretched out sweatpants and tied your hair in a messy bun. You didn't pay attention to your appearance at all, you didn't care if you looked beautiful or like a total bum.

You reluctantly left the room, blinded by the bright light that wasn't in your room. Squinting slightly, you headed towards the kitchen to eat whatever you could find in the fridge. All the time you were locked in your room, you weren't eating well, in fact, you could almost say you weren't eating at all.

You were only one thing away from starving yourself because Minho brought you home-cooked meals every day. The boy must have guessed that something was wrong, because often when you didn't open the door for him, he left food at your door, with a note attached with some nice words written on it.

Stretching, you crossed the threshold of the living room, but stopped mid-step to look around the room. Surprise was evident on your face as your eyes fell on the walls decorated with colorful garlands and balloons, and the table groaning under the weight of gifts caught your attention.

You were confused and started to wonder what was happening and who this celebration was organized for. You repeated all the boys' birthdays in your head, but none of them had even close birthdays. Unless you couldn't keep track of time and got the dates wrong. However, before you could comprehend the situation, a group of your close friends entered the living room.

"Surprise!" They shouted at the same time, causing surprise to appear on your face.

The boys smiled brightly as they stood in front of you, ready to wish you a happy birthday.

As the initial shock left your body, you felt your entire body warm up from the warmth of their gesture.

"I completely forgot it was my birthday today!" You laughed lightly, still unable to believe what the boys had prepared. "Thank you very much. It makes my day.”

"No problem, Y/n! We're here to support you and make you feel special!" Chan smiled, coming to hug you.

“We will do everything to make you feel special every day. “ Minho placed a sweet kiss on your cheek.

Their words brought tears to your eyes. You were touched by their kind gesture, but you were also sad that you distanced yourself from them so much and they would steal the moon for you.

"We have prepared something special for you." Changbin added, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder.

At this time, Felix entered the room, holding a huge handmade cake. This made you completely fall apart. You made a wish “ That this moment would last forever and that you would never have to leave them.” And you blew out the candle.

You lived this beautiful moment, you were happy to have them next to you. The boys were racing to give you gifts you never dreamed of having. You got a big teddy bear, beautiful perfume and much more. Finally, it was Hyunjin's turn, and he was the only one waiting calmly for his turn.

He brought you a beautifully packaged, quite large but narrow gift. You had absolutely no idea what it was. You carefully tore the decorative paper and saw a hand-painted picture of all 9 of you. Tears flooded your eyes again, you didn't know what to say, you were touched. You simply snuggled tightly into Hyunjin's chest, who hugged you back and gently rubbed your back, assuring you that your emotions were normal.

“I really don't know what to say. I love you guys. I love you so much. I'm sorry I've been acting like this lately, but my parents are getting me down. “ The smile on the boys' faces quickly turned into consternation. After all, you didn't tell them anything about the increasingly frequent threatening messages from your parents.

“Y/n, you can always tell us if something is bothering you. You know we will always listen to you and try our best to help you.” Han said, sitting down next to you and wrapping his arms around you.

You looked at all the boys who were waiting for your answer. You took a deep breath to collect your thoughts and began to speak.

“My parents started texting me more and more often, threatening to find me and force me to marry the guy who molested me at one of their parties. They chose him only because he is the son of an influential businessman who can strengthen their position on the market. Recently their messages have become more and more detailed and it seems to me that they are already close to finding me. I'm afraid they'll take me away from here and I'll never see you again." Just at the mention of your parents, you started shaking.

Han and Minho immediately hugged you, trying to calm you down. Of course, their touch, their warmth helped and I felt unpleasant shivers.

“You don't have to worry Y/n, we won't let anyone take you from us. Hyunjin assured you, gently circling your hand with his finger.

You looked around the room, seeing all the boys standing close to you, assuring you that everything would be okay, it made your body fill with peace and warmth. You trusted them, you trusted that they would do everything to make you feel good, like the most important person in the world. You were theirs and they were yours.

Your mood improved slightly and you decided that there was no point in wasting time and that you should celebrate.

“Let's celebrate! “ You screamed, and all eight of them followed you.

The next thing you could hear were cheers and the sounds of opening bottles and cans full of various alcohols echoing around the room. You had a great time listening to great music. The time for drinking new drinks made by Hyunjin was interrupted by dancing with each of the boys.

After a few drinks and you don't know how long, you danced with everyone except Chan, who was sitting on the couch watching you all. The boy was by far the most sober person in the entire house and he was having a great time watching his friends behave after drinking too much alcohol.

You had to admit that it must have looked funny when everyone was tripping over their feet, falling and rolling on the ground laughing. You felt like you were about halfway there when it came to your level of intoxication. The clear winner was Han, who was close to dying, but Minho was already taking care of him to prevent that from happening.

You took a few sips of another drink and felt a great need to dance with someone. You looked around the room and everyone seemed to be busy. Minho was keeping an eye on Han, Changbin was practicing with Felix, and Hyunjin was preparing more drinks for Jeongin and Seungmin. The only person who was doing nothing was Chan, who was sitting in the men's spread, leaning against the backrest, one hand between his legs. His posture exuded confidence.

He looked hot and you swore he had been staring at you for a long time. His gaze was deep and full of mystery, radiating sensuality, like the flames of a fire in the dark. His lips were slightly parted, revealing the spark of unbridled lust that danced in his eyes. His breathing was almost palpable, and every movement of his muscles focused your attention on him. He looked at you as if he wanted to dive into the ocean of your existence.

You took a few steps towards him, keeping your eyes on him and started dancing. It wasn't a very difficult dance, you focused more on sensuality than skill. You squirmed to the rhythm of the music, gently pulling up your shirt every now and then, exposing your belly.

Chan wasn't reacting the way you wanted him to, he was just looking at you, so you decided to get closer. Your movements were bold, full of sex appeal. You stood between his legs, turned your back to him and leaned up, exposing your round buttocks. You felt his hands on your thighs, moving slowly upwards. And after a while, your buttock burned from the boy's strong slap.

You turned to him, a slight smirk on his face. He licked his lips slowly, grabbing the back of your legs and pulling you towards him so that you were now straddling his lap. Chan squeezed your buttocks and you moved your hips to the rhythm of the music.

You were about to press a kiss to his plump, full lips when you felt the cold, sticky drink spread over your body. You jumped away from Chan and saw Han lying on the ground with an empty glass in his hand. Minho was already standing near him and trying to pick him up, apologizing to you at the same time.

You weren't mad at your friend, you even laughed when you noticed how bad his condition was. You wiped your face from the drops of drink running down your cheeks. You looked down at yourself and realized that you needed to take a bath, and quickly, before your hair got unresolvable tangles.

You went to your room, grabbed your towel and went to the bathroom. You took off your soaking wet clothes and stepped into the shower. Water flowed from the ceiling shower, creating a cascade of pearl drops that resounded melodiously in harmony with the gentle noise. Steam filled the bathroom, enveloping you in a mist of humidity, creating an intimate atmosphere.

You sank into yours, standing under the stream of warm water that enveloped you like a soothing touch. Your skin reacted to the heat, and you squinted slightly as the drops flowed down your body like pearls on velvet fabric. This pleasant feeling brought to mind the situation from a moment ago.

Thinking about Chan, you started caressing your body. Your hands glided over your skin and you melted into the pleasant massage that dissipated the tension and made you feel relaxed. You imagined that every movement of your hands was replaced by Chan's, as if he was standing with you in the shower and caressing your body.

You were starting to get aroused, heat filling every inch of your body. You slowly rubbed your thighs together, trying to satisfy your needs in any way possible. You placed two fingers in your mouth, swirling your tongue around them. Every now and then you sucked on one of them, you really wanted your fingers to be something else, but for now it had to be enough.

You moved your saliva-moistened fingers to your crotch. You painted in circular motions on your clit. Your mouth involuntarily opened in pleasure, letting out a soft moan. You grabbed your breast with your other hand and slowly started caressing it. A wave of pleasure spreads through your body. It was becoming increasingly difficult for you to take a full breath, and the drops of water hitting the ground drowned out your moans.

Your imagination began to work even better, behind your closed eyes you knew Chan was touching you where you liked it best. Drops of water replaced his lips as they glided over your body, leaving wet marks made with his tongue.

“Agh…Chan…Yes…that's right…” You couldn't hold back your words.

Suddenly you heard loud clapping. Your eyes immediately opened, moving towards the sound. Chan was standing in the doorway. He was leaning against the wall and shaking his head slightly. As usual, he had that smirk on his face.

“ Oh well, someone's having fun here. “He went inside and closed the door behind him.

His voice was calm, slightly throaty, pleasantly teasing to your ears. You were shocked and quickly stopped doing what you were just doing. You got out of the shower and wrapped yourself in a towel. The boy immediately pinned you to the wall, lifting your arms up. The quick movement caused your towel to slide to the ground.

You stood completely naked in front of him, his thigh between your legs, pressing against your still sensitive pussy. His body was close enough to you that you could feel the warmth radiating from it. The boy leaned towards you, closing the distance between you even more.

“Let me show you what a real pleasure is, baby girl.” He whispered into your ear, pressing even harder against your crotch.

His movement made you bite your lip, holding back the release of the moan that was hiding just beyond your lips. As soon as he loosened his grip, your hands fell limply to his shoulders. Your fingers dug into his neck as his full lips placed their first kiss on your neck.

You felt every move he made, every breath he took, with double the force. Your body was very sensitive to everything he did. You closed your eyes, completely surrendering to his touch. You drown in his kisses, which lightly tickle your neck. Chan knew exactly what to do to give you as much pleasure as possible.

His lips traveled all over your neck, leaving wet marks in their wake. Every now and then he would lightly suck on your neck and your body would respond with a beautiful arch, allowing him even better access. They don't want to let you rest for a moment, the boy ran his tongue along your collarbones, lightly biting your skin.

You dug your fingers into his skin even harder, to the point that your fingertips turned white. You couldn't hold back your moans any longer as his hands cupped the underside of your breasts, lifting them slightly. Before you knew it, his mouth was around your nipple, sucking on it. Moments later, Chan added his tongue, rubbing small circles around your hard nipple.

“Agh…Channie…” It fell from your lips, causing a smile to appear on Chan's face, but he didn't stop playing with your breasts. His tongue swirled nimbly between one nipple and the other, biting them from time to time.

While he was giving you an enormous amount of pleasure, you didn't want to be left indebted to him, so you slid one hand down his body, grabbed the bottom of his shirt, and in one swift movement, took it off him. The boy was now standing topless in front of you, and even though it wasn't the first time you had seen him without a shirt, you were always amazed by the sight of his well-built body.

The other hand went to his already swollen crotch. You moved it around, adapting to the rhythm Chan gave you with his tongue. The atmosphere in the bathroom was getting hotter and the air was getting thicker, making it difficult for you to breathe.

Finally, Chan stopped playing with your breasts and in a fluid movement he sat you down on the counter next to the sink. He moved between your legs, cupping your buttocks in his hands and planted a luscious kiss on your lips. Your tongues fought against each other in a romantic dance, your saliva mixing together in thin threads as you broke apart for a moment to breathe.

You felt that you wouldn't last long until Chan filled you from the inside, so you slightly pushed him away from you, knelt right in front of him and took off his pants and panties. The boy knew exactly what you were planning, he inserted his fingers between your hair and gripped it hard.

Without further ado, you took his cock into your mouth and deepthroated him. Tiny drops of tears formed in your eyes as Chan pushed his cock even harder down your throat. But you didn't move away, you just looked at him from below and started moving your head. Chan towered over you, looking at you with great desire, but at the same time carefully making sure he didn't overdo his movements.

His cock grew even bigger in your mouth, revealing his thick veins. Your legs were already starting to shake. You couldn't hold in any longer the arousal that was inside you. Your juices flowed out of you, more and more.

Chan lifted you off his lap, bending you down and resting you against the bathroom counter. You were facing the mirror and you were leaning towards it. Your breasts were pressed against the cold stone. The boy spread your legs, immediately placing the first, not too hard, slap on your buttock.

A heavy sigh escaped your lips, but you liked it. A moment later you felt Chan guide his fully erect cock towards your hole. You couldn't wait for him to fill you, for him to start fucking you. You were ready to fulfill every one of his deepest fantasies.

Chan immediately pushed his full length into you and waited for you to get used to his size. Only when he was sure everything was okay did he start moving. His movements were strong and confident, hitting your sweet spot perfectly. Your legs went slightly weak under you, but Chan quickly caught you and supported you so that you wouldn't run away from him.

The force of Chan's movements was so strong that you placed your hand on the mirror to give yourself better support. You were now looking directly at your reflection and seeing what you looked like when Chan was fucking you from behind.

Your earlier play had brought you close to your climax, and now you didn't have to wait long for a wave of pleasure to wash over your body. The orgasm was very strong, your whole body was shaking and you were glad that Chan was holding you because you would definitely fall.

The boy didn't stop moving his hips the whole time, maintaining the same rhythm. When you reached the end of your fulfillment, you felt another slap, this time harder, on your buttock. Your bottom stung and the raspberry red imprint of his hand appeared on it.

“I'll make you scream my name.” Chan's voice resonated in your ears, but you didn't fully understand what he said because the post-orgasmic emotions hadn't left you yet.

“Chan more, more please.” Was all you could say as your eyes rolled back in pleasure.

You lowered your head, but the boy grabbed your hair and pulled you up so you could see what he was doing to you.

“Look how you look while I'm fucking you. Watch you act like a whore, demanding more.” His movements became even more aggressive.

A few movements and your body experienced a pleasant feeling again. Your pussy throbbed and the feeling became almost unbearable. Two such intense orgasms in a matter of minutes exhausted you, but Chan had no intention of stopping.

“Chan I…I can't take it anymore.” Your voice was shaky and very quiet.

“Hold on for me just a little longer, baby girl.” He placed a few kisses along your spine and continued in the same rhythm again.

He gripped your hips even tighter, digging his fingers into your skin. His movements were strong, and he moved you to double the force of his blows to your sweet spot. After two powerful orgasms, you were overstimulated and your eyes were glazed over with tears gathering in them.

You don't know how long it took until you felt the pleasure approaching again, but for you it felt like an eternity. And your mirror image showed it perfectly. You were all wet, your hair was sticking to your forehead, your eyes were red and your body felt like jelly.

"Chhan! Agh! Chan! I can't handle it anymore. I can't stand it.” You shouted without lowering your voice at all.

“Just a moment. You can do it." His voice was airy and heavy, as if he was approaching fulfillment himself.

“Agh…Chan!!!” You couldn't take it any longer and a third orgasm took over your body.

Your walls tightened around Chan's cock as it began to throb inside you.

“Ugh…You're tightening on me. It feels so good.” The boy sped up his movements and a moment later you felt warm sperm shooting inside you.

Your legs were shaking mercilessly and felt like cotton. You dropped your body onto the cold countertop and were glad that Chan was holding you, because you would have been on the ground a long time ago. When he finished cumming inside you, he pulled out of you and placed a sweet kiss on your ass where his handprint was.

While you were recovering on the bathroom counter, Chan ran a bath for you. Once the water filled the tub, he lifted you up like a princess and gently placed you in, then sat down right behind you and wrapped his arms around you tenderly.

“Happy birthday Y/n. You did well.” He said, pulling you closer to him and placing a small kiss on your shoulder.

Your cheeks flushed and you don't know why you felt embarrassed.

“Thank you Chan.” You rested your head on his shoulder and snuggled in as much as you could.

You spent some time in the water, your fingers started to wrinkle and the water slowly became cold but you felt blissful. You immersed yourself in the moment, your moment together.

“Y/n.” You turned to face Chan. “Back to what you told us. You have nothing to worry about, we won't let you be taken away, you have nothing to worry about. You belong to us and your place is here, with us. We all love you and we won't give it up for anything in the world.” His words made you emotional and you placed a kiss on his lips.

Suddenly you heard a bang coming from behind the door and then you remembered that there were 7 very drunk guys in the living room. You quickly got out of the bathtub, got dressed and went to take care of the revolution that was taking place in the living room.

<- Part 22 | Part 24 ->

[gayuu-the-necromancer]

William Rex Madness Route - Chapter 25

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"These are all the sins of William Rex that I have seen as a Fairy Tale Master."

"In addition----"

(....Okay, done!)

Since that night, when the case against Grimsley was solved,

I sat down to finish the last lines of my report, which I had spent several days writing.

(It's gotten a lot thicker)

I have an appointment later this evening to submit this report to Victor.

Today is the end of my time as Fairy Tale Master, the first day of the new month.

(...Mm? That sound----)

Suddenly, I hear a familiar sound from behind my door and I listened carefully.

Steady hard sole hitting the floor, gentle footsteps sound were approaching.

It is the only footsteps that makes my heart pound.

(On second thoughts)

A light knock on the door confirms my expectations and I can't help but smile.

Kate: "Come in, William."

When I rushed to the door to see him without waiting any longer, he raised his one eyebrow happily.

William: "Next time, if I want to surprise you, I'll have to be more quiet."

Kate: "Fufu, you right."

William's fingertips tickled my ears, as if he was praising me for remembering the sounds of his footsteps.

Looking down at me, who is laughing at the tickle, William tilted his head.

William: "Did you finish writing your report?"

Kate: "Yep. Just in time. Thankfully."

Pointing with my gaze at the bundle of papers on the desk.

William: "Ohh...That's quite a lot of papers, I see."

William: "Did I commit that many crimes in one month?"

William: "I heard you've painted a very wordy picture of my misdeeds."

William squints with satisfaction, as if to celebrate a joyous achievement,

I was so happy----

-----Options------

Bend my knees slightly and bow.

Puff out my chest exaggeratedly

Smile and nod.

--------

That I puff out my chest exaggeratedly.

Kate: "Yep. You're a brutal, atrocious and a deadly sinner."

William: "Fufu....I'm lucky to have such a good spokesperson in my life."

Kate: "Mmm...."

The lingering lips of a laugh lightly touch my cheek.

The kiss was soft and fragile, and my chest made a soft sound.

It only takes one kiss to make me soar and get hot to the tips of my ear.

It's evidence that this whole body knows it's 'good' to be loved by him.

William: "It's about time you met up with Brian."

Kate: "Eh?....Oh my gosh, really!?"

William: "You have an appointment with Brian Bennett....then Victor. You are very busy today, huh?"

William: "Don't fall down the rabbit hole in a hurry."

Kate: "I'll be very careful, because the most exciting appointment is waiting for me at the end of the day."

William: "Don't worry about it. Even I'm going to be a bit busy today. I have an urgent mission."

Kate: "Eh!?"

｡⋆｡˚🦋˚｡⋆｡

Kate: "Eh!?"

(Urgent mission...)

Kate: "Oh...so are you cancelling the dinner tonight....?'

William: "Of course not. You know I'm selfish, don't you?"

William: "I won't be so auspicious as to choose between the mission and a date with you."

William: "I'll have it done by the time you get back to the castle."

Kate: ".....Nn..Mm...."

William: "Mm?"

Kate: "....Hearing that makes me so happy that I want to kiss you."

William: "....I'm ready."

Kate: ".....But, I'm sure it won't end with just a kiss and then we both would be late for our respective appointments, so...."

William: "Hahaha!

-----The 'Mad Tea Party' house which had been temporarily closed due to the newspaper article that caused a public uproar, reopened its doors a few days ago.

When Mr. Brian heard rumors of the reopening he was quicker than anyone else to rush in.

The injured of the Tower of London were being escorted to the Royal Hospital by William's men.

Mr. Brian had slipped out of a special ward.

He was running around with a sore leg to get his words out to the public.

I don't know what conversation William and Mr. Brian had.

But I know that William would have laughed when he heard the story and said, 'That's very Brian.'

Somehow, I could imagine it.

Mr. Brian said he would like to talk to me in person.

Kate: "....Are you worried? About me meeting Mr. Brian."

While picking up my handbag, I cast a glance at him.

(Can't you at least be a little jealous or worried....?)

Even now that I know that William loves me.

I want to see the 'special things' he pours out, only for me.

It's an extraordinary sweet treat that only I get.

William: "Hmmm....."

With a serious expression on his face, William slid his hand down my cheek and lifted my chin.

Kate: "Nn....?"

William: "There is a good chance he'll make a pass at you...you are a charmer after all."

Kate: "Eh....Ah...."

(The reaction was somewhat different from what I expected...)

My face heats up with praise, shyly.

William: ".....Besides, he is your 'hero' and you are his 'biggest fan' too...."

His eyes squint and the tempo of my heartbeat changes.

Kate: ".....T-That's....right..."

William: "..........."

William: ".....Even taking all that into account, I'm not worried."

Kate: "Hm?"

William let me go with a snap and turned on his heel, smiling as usual.

William: "See you tonight."

Kate: "Ah! .....But....!"

Leaving me shrugging my shoulders, William gallantly disappears through the doors.

William sees through my special needs and plays with it.

The unfulfilled desires that have been left unchecked, simmer.

I know it's going to get thicker and deeper.

But I also want my favorite person to taste it.

(Even if we become partners, William will always stay the same....)

(Gentle, dangerous, free, selfish and enigmatic)

And I am in love with him every day.

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Brian: "....! Miss Kate."

When I walked through the door of the cafe, the meeting spot, a fearless red-haired man stood up from his chair.

Kate: "Mr. Brian, it's been a while. How are your legs?"

Brian: "Look who's talking! Are you...okay?"

Kate: "I'm all better now. I was lucky that the wounds were shallow and did not reach my internal organs."

Brian: "I see....that's good....."

Mr. Brian collapsed and sat down in his chair.

(You've been really, really worried about me...for a long time, right?)

We sat down opposite each other and ordered a cake and a cup of tea.

Mr. Brian straightened his back and turned to me.

Brian: "....And if I hadn't been swayed by Grimsley to write that article, Count Rex's friends wouldn't have been arrested."

Brian: "You also wouldn't have to gotten....hurt like that. I'm really sorry...."

Kate: "Don't apologize. I know you were only following your heart!"

Kate: "Your articles are always....filled with a desire to reduce the number of people being hurt."

Kate: "The words you write are filled with your thoughts and feelings without any falsehoods."

Kate: "That's why people who read it, doubted William at first, and then when you wrote the new article.......the people are once again believing in his innocence."

Kate: "....It's because of that, that I became a fan of you."

Brian: ".....Nmm.."

Kate: "Besides, you've already apologized to the whole of London."

Brian: ".....Haha. I came here....prepared to be blamed, but I didn't expect....to be encouraged like this."

(Thank god, he finally laughed)

Kate: "I have no reason to blame you."

Brian: "....You've changed. I feel like I every time I look at you...."

Brian: "You look much better than how you were before...."

Waitress: "Excuse me. I brought you some chiboust and mille-feuille glace."

Brian: "! .....Ah."

Kate: "Thank you."

(Ah strawberries)

Mr. Brian asked for chiboust with bright red fruit on top.

My mouth loosened involuntarily at the sight of them, as I thought about William's smiling face saying 'It's my favorite.'

When I see the thing liked by my favorite person, that's all is enough to bring a smile to my face.

The strawberries on the cake looked like a treasure.

Brian: "...Do you like strawberries? Here, you can have mine if you like."

Kate: "Eh? Ah no no no!"

(Did I look like I wanted to eat it? How embarrassing....)

Kate: "I'm sorry, I was just...remembering William telling me how much he liked strawberries."

Brian: "....O-Oh.."

............

After a few casual conversations, we left the store.

Staring at the sallow-colored city, Mr. Brian muttered.

Brian: "I...thought I was doing the right thing and didn't even question it."

Brian: "The idea of carrying out justice for the masses....is an outrageous conceit."

Brian: "Count Rex must have real justice on his shoulders. I wonder if that's why you wanted to protect him."

Kate: "Real justice...?"

Mr. Brian's words made me realise that he had been grossly misled.

(Sensible, understanding...'well-behaved exemplary delivering person')

(I would never love an evil person unless I was crazy enough to do so)

(......Maybe 'I inside him' is also the same)

Kate: "Mr. Brian, that's not true."

Brian: "....? Then?"

Kate: "William is a bad person, and a greatly evil one."

Brian: ".....!"

Brian: "Hahaha....okay okay..."

Brian: "No wonder my persuasion didn't resonate with you."

Mr. Brian said this in a clear voice and laughed.

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The Crown Castle, sinking into the dusk is so beautiful that it leaves one speechless.

I returned to the Castle, admiring its grandeur

I wore my dress for the date, took my report and went to see Victor.

After receiving the report and looking it over carefully Victor looked up.

Victor: "Okay, the report. Hmm....this is.."

Victor: "The last page is missing."

Kate: ".....Yes. I left the last page like that because I'm not done yet."

Victor seemed to have understood what I'm trying to say.

His jewel-like eyes sparkled, looking straight at me.

Victor: "Then...can you say it in words for me? What do you want to do now, Kate?"

Kate: "...Yes."

I gently placed my hand on my heart and folded my knees slightly.

Kate: "I would like to remain in this Castle, as the fairy tale master."

Victor: ".....I've known for a long time now that you love William and want to be there to protect him."

Victor: "But....why do you wanna continue being a fairy tale master?"

Kate: "To conquer the evil with evil."

Evil will not be crushed. Sad scenes will not cease.

The world keeps on turning filled with so many unvoiced screams.

(So I want to write down William's evil)

(The more feel his sins.....the more I love him)

(I'm sure it will touch the hearts of those who reads it)

Kate: "If only I could write down William's penetrating evil as a potent, posthumous poison by my own hands...."

Kate: "I don't think I could be happier."

The last page that has not been submitted has already been spelled out.

"This is all the sins of William that I have seen as a fairy tale master."

"And with your presumption, Her Majesty the Queen, I hereby note my selfish wish."

"As he once said, there is nothing more sinful than killing people."

"Sin is always a sin. With that unshakable fact I write him down as a great sinner."

"But he who values liberty and condemns as evil to those who tramples on it, and judges him with self-righteousness."

"I love him with all my heart."

"I want so much to protect him from the punishment that will eventually come to him for the sins he commits."

"This wish, I meant after the punishment has been inflicted."

"If one day our sins are punished...we would like you to write down what happened to us..."

"Fairy tales end only when evil is judged."

"That this report will be completed with a sad conclusion, a spoonful of poison to admonish the wicked."

"From the bottom if my heart my prayers are with you."

------Before long, the sun drops beyond the horizon.

A creeping darkness envelops my body.

Victor: "Welcome, Kate."

The Grim Reaper smiled solemnly, his arms outstretched like the night darkness that covers the sky.

Victor: ".....Welcome to the darkness."

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A light melody can be heard from somewhere.

A light, joyful sound echoing in the dark night when there is no sound of the wind makes my heart skip a beat.

The sound of my own footsteps in the polished corridor mingles with the melody of the piano.

I feel as if I'm dancing.

(If life is a fairy tale, it's easy to be happy. Just don't do anything we aren't allowed to do.)

(Like, don't enter the forests you mustn't enter, doors you mustn't open, secrets you mustn't know-----)

----Don't fall in love.

Kate: "William."

The man who plays the piano so gracefully was just like the night we first met,

He slowly stood up and extended his hand to me.

William: "Come here, my robin."

My feet began to move towards him.

Because I already know the pleasure of being touched by those blood-coloured fingertips.

Kate: "....Did I bother you?"

William: "No. I was playing it to lure you out and it worked as intended.."

He pulled my hips gently as if we were waltzing.

The urges I'd been holding back before we went out, made me pull him closer to me.

Kate: "Mm...."

Before I could say anything, my lips were stolen.

William: "....Mm..fufu...."

Kate: "...What....?"

William: "No...if you wanted me to stay, you don't have to be reluctant."

William: "You asked me if we could do something passionate as soon as I get back...."

William: "....I don't have time to wait."

Kate: "Ah....."

When I heard that, I was so excited that my skin trembled.

Kate: ".....William...."

William: "Mm....?"

Kate: "If you do this....we will be...late for dinner...."

My voice fades slightly at the end, clearly filled with the joy of being touched.

William lets out a throaty chuckle, as if he was amused.

William: "....You're a naughty girl."

William: "You're tyring to make me a bad guy by provoking me like that----"

Kate: "....Ah...."

His sweet whispers invite my true feelings.

The warmth of his palm, his breathing, the scent of roses that surrounds his whole body.

Everything he gives me absorbs into my body.

It stirs up and exposes the tender parts deep within.

Like a deadly poison.

(....More)

(I want to touch you more)

(I want to feel you more)

No matter how 'wrong' it is----

------Because it's a 'good thing' for me.

William: "Come...let go of everything and fall with me."

Kate: "....Yes, William."

Kate: "I'll go anywhere with you..."

William: "....That's my robin."

From the back alleys dripping with rain, from the surface of the deep dark water from the steamy station.

I feel like someone or something is calling me....

As if singing, with a graceful melody.

I will no longer defy the voice that calls me.

The voice of this heart, whispering----

Be free to sing for you and your love.

Madness route - Epilogue

[itjazzbicch]

What Wasn't Meant To Be

Pairing: Shang Tsung x Fem Reader 

Summary: This is a prequel to my Escaping False Fate Mini Series!

Escaping False Fate PT. 1 - Escaping False Fate PT. 2

After a man interrupts Shang Tsung during a sales pitch, claiming his work to be fake, the day takes an unfortunate turn; the reader comes to check on her business partner, who holds a special place in her heart after bonding for so long, where she learns vaguely that their lives are about to take a drastic turn...

Warnings:  NONE! Just fluff🥰

Quick Note: I thought that this would be a cute little idea after thinking about the mini-series and based on the photos I use below!

Word Count: 1k 

"You surely cannot be without this medicine that I prepared..."

Shang Tsung was managing by making 'medicine,' which I couldn't insult as I did similar things to make money in the cruel world that we lived in. However, tonight, I had a gift for him that I worked very hard on. A medicine that would work.

Today was quite an eventful one, not for the better, unfortunately. A man came after Shang Tsung and practically started a mob, ruining his product, and I knew that the scene that occurred was weighing on his shoulders.

It was likely going to ripple his future, and considering we were partners, just trying to make money to live, I wanted to help him in any way I could.

"Shang?"

Coming to his stand, I didn't notice him inside, the heavy rain not helping with my vision, but as I turned the corner, he stood in the rain, staring off into nothingness.

"You shouldn't be standing in the rain like this."

Something was going on, but I didn't know what. Either way, I wanted to help him and give him my gift, taking his hand softly and guiding him inside:

"Come inside. I have something to show you."

"Something to show me, hm?"

Looking down at his hand in mine, he hid an evident smile. It made my heart feel lighter. I smiled softly as I nodded, following him inside his mobile stand.

I was familiar with it, sitting him down and getting him a change of clothes, questioning:

"Any particular reason you were standing out in the rain?"

Silence. He was staring off into space, that grin on his face. It made me even more curious now. I didn't want to push him, so I sat his clothes next to him, kneeling gently in front of him so I could get him to stop staring at nothing and find my gaze.

"Would you like to see your gift?"

"What a lovely surprise," He chuckled with a grin, "What is it?"

He had some dry patches of skin on his face, and he was far too handsome to deal with such a burden that wasn't necessary. Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out a jar with some cream inside, opened it, and put a small amount on my finger.

"This will help with those dry patches," I explained and offered, "I promise, it will help."

"How thoughtful of you," He grinned, closing his eyes softly as I rubbed it into his skin, getting the patches on his cheek and temple. I couldn't help but smile when he sighed, relieved; it was working already.

"Just keep using it, and your skin will glow," I hummed, gazing into his eyes deeply as he looked into mine, continuing to grin.

Every time I looked into his eyes, my heart skipped a beat. I couldn't describe the feeling, but it surged within me. I nearly got lost in admiring the handsomeness held along with his deep brown eyes till that grin caught my attention again.

My patience was wearing thin because of my curiosity, whispering to him:

"Any particular reason as to why you're grinning like that?"

"I have a question for you." He whispered back, nearly staring into my soul, and his gaze told me this question was necessary.

"I'm listening."

"If our lives were to change drastically, would you continue to be loyal to me?"

This wasn't what I expected, but Shang and I had been business partners for quite some time, and I would be a liar if I said I didn't trust him or that I wasn't loyal to him. As much as I hid it, he had a spot in my heart, and there was never any running from the feeling.

"I'd hope that the change you speak of would be for the better," I sighed, then smiled into his eyes, "But whether if it's good or bad, I'll continue to be loyal to you, Shang."

"Our lives will be changing for the better, dear."

Something must've happened before I came here, and I could only stare as I tried to think of what could have happened, my heart racing as when he called me, dear.

"Did something happen?" I wouldn't dig for too much, but I would've liked an answer.

Shang started to smile, a bright one, nodding and saying vaguely, "I have been presented with an opportunity. An amazing opportunity."

I cocked my eyebrow, my eyes asking for a more direct answer, then he cupped my face, thumbs caressing my cheeks. My heart raced even quicker as he did, softly telling me:

"Imagine being as strong as a deity, having the realms at our feet. Never having to live like this again. Just imagine, dear."

The thought of that made my blood rush. I hated this life, and to come from this life to this power he spoke of? It was like a drug straight into my veins.

"We will achieve such power. All I need you to do is trust and be loyal to me."

"Y-Yes," I nodded, a crack of thunder roaring in the sky as I smiled with a tear of happiness, "Always."

"With time, we will have the realms at our feet. We'll never have to live like this again," He was nearly panting from being so excited at the thought, another crack of thunder roaring when he brought his lips to mine.

I'd never felt my blood run so hot, something in his kiss telling me that every word he spoke was accurate, the spot he had in my heart growing and taking over me as I deepened our kiss, holding his cheeks to keep him close, his lips curling into another grin as I poured my heart into his lips.

When our lips parted, I shook with every breath I took, slowly gazing up into his eyes, and the more he smiled, so did I, to the point where we started laughing, pressing my forehead to his as I whispered:

"I knew that when we met, our lives would change. It almost feels as if we defied a cruel destiny."

His eyes were filled with determination, seeing his gears going and creating a plan, squeezing my cheeks as he smiled, "We will defy that cruel fate, my dear Y/N." 

2024 © itjazzbicch — do not repost or translate my work. Likes, reblogs, and comments are always welcome 

[acourtofbooksandshadows]

Not So Routine- Chapter 8

Summary: Unexpected visitors cause your night to go astray. Luckily Mor is there to help anchor you.

Pairings: Eventual!Nessian x Afab!Reader Current!Mor x Afab!Reader

Warnings: Angst, men being disgusting foul little things, blood, weapons, swearing, wounds, passing out, vomit, bones breaking, child abuse from parent and death. Just please tread lightly if you are squeamish or uncomfortable with any of the above topics.

Word count: 3233

Bookshelf Series Bookshelf

It seemed that all the eventful experiences of the day were not in fact over. Because when you got home that night you paused dead in your tracks and stared widely at the forms waiting for you. Out of everyone you’d expected to be at your door it definitely wasn’t Azriel and Rhysand. You stared at them in shock and Rhysand tried to give you his best calming smile while Azriel didn’t even try to look less intimidating. 

“Oh, hello, I wasn’t expecting company today.” They were blocking your door and didn’t seem like they were going to move until your keys rattled. Rhysand stepped aside and Azriel tucked his wings in as you approached, you made quick work of the door before ushering them inside. You groaned as you realized you hadn’t cleaned up your apartment in a couple days. You hadn’t thought you’d need to since Mor was the only one that ever came over and she didn’t mind a bit of clutter. 

“I’m sorry for the mess. I wasn’t-” Your words were cut off by Rhysand. 

“Expecting company.” Nerves were working through you at a fast pace. You had a feeling that this wasn’t a friendly visit. Especially with the way Azriel seemed a little on edge. 

“Is this about Devlon?” You chewed on your lower lip so hard you started to taste blood before releasing it. 

“I’ve been gathering information on him and the males in ironcrest. I’m just wanting to iron out a few details with you.” Azriel’s voice surprised you as you realized this was the first time you’ve heard it. 

“Would either of you like tea or anything?” You stood awkwardly in the doorway to your kitchen that was just next to your front door. They both shook their head and you lead them towards your dining room table. You were thankful for the bench that lined one side of the table as Azriel was able to comfortably sit without his wings being in the way. 

“What would you like to know?” Azriel shot off a list of names in reply and had you confirm or deny their involvement. But you hadn’t known any of their names so that didn’t help at all. 

“We could try something different instead. If you’re comfortable with it of course.” You eyed Rhysand curiously already suspecting you wouldn’t like the words about to leave his mouth. 

“I could look at the memory and we could narrow down who they are that way.” A large wave of nausea took over you at the thought of reliving the experience that had scarred you not only physically but mentally and emotionally as well. 

“Does it have to be tonight?” You hadn’t realized you were picking at your nails until you pulled on a especially tender spot and you dropped your hands into your lap. 

“The sooner the better. I’m afraid that if they get wind of me digging around they might flee or try to hide any evidence of their activities.” Azriel’s voice shook you once again. Though from the stories you’ve heard of him you doubted anyone would figure out what he was up to. Unless of course he wanted them too. Rhysand seemed to take pity in the way you shook as he placed a calming hand on your arm from his spot next to you.

“Would you like me to request Mor join us?” You nodded your head quickly at his question, you knew her presence would help you undoubtedly. His eyes glazed over for a moment and after waiting with baited breath he came back. He didn’t even have to tell you what she said as she appeared in the space behind Rhysand. 

“I’m scared.” You whispered to her as she pulled a chair next to yours. She grabbed your hand that was closest to her and intertwined her fingers with yours. 

“I know but I’ll be here the whole time. Then we can go to bed afterwards.” She dragged the smooth skin of her thumb along the smooth skin of the back of your hand soothingly. You nodded your head at her before turning back to Rhysand, who was eyeing you and his cousin curiously. 

“I’m ready.” Somehow your voice came out steady and your hands didn’t shake. But nausea was something you couldn’t push away. This would be the first and the only time you showed it to someone else. 

“Would it be alright for me to share the memory with Azriel and Mor as you share it with me?” You nodded your head at him and began chewing on your lip again. Your eyes fluttered closed and then squeezed tight. Rhysand began to claw at your mind and you let out him enter as a shaky breath left your mouth. Once he found the memory you were whisked into it. 

When you had awoken that morning you groaned in pain. Your stomach and back felt like it was on fire and being stabbed all at once. You sat up with a wince and that’s when you noticed the wet feeling between your legs. You lifted the blanket up and stared at the blood that pooled between your legs. Panic set through you like water breaking through a damn. 

You weren’t exactly sure what was happening to you. But you knew that if your father found out that he’d find some way to punish you. So you got out of your bed and stood on shaky legs. There were chores that you needed to complete before Devlon came home. Even though you felt an ache and a sweat all over your body you couldn’t leave the chores unfinished. 

Your legs barely held you up as you exited your cramped room and made your way to the bathroom. You bunched up a small towel in your underwear to hopefully hold the blood that still steadily poured out of you. The rough feeling of the walls dug into your hand as you caught yourself from falling down the stairs when a particularly sharp jab spiked in your side. Your wings unused twitched open and closed behind you. After two large glasses of water to hold down the nausea and a mug of tea, with a bowl of oatmeal you finally started on your chores. 

Even though your father had a wife she did nothing to help you. Instead she would sit around most of the day and complain. She would complain about anything she could think of. Most of the time though it was you she’d complain about. Then there were some days where she would stay in her room and wouldn’t leave until your father came home. That left all the chores for you. It had become a routine at this point though. Wake up, eat breakfast, make your fathers bed, do the dishes, do the laundry, dust, sweep, mop, take care of the trash and then have dinner on the table by the time he comes home. 

You had just got done making dinner when your father came into the small house. The cramps had lessened as you worked around the house so you were going to bathe and wash the towels you had gone through while he ate dinner. But he called out to you when your foot met the second step of the stairs. You turned around nervously and you saw him take a deep breath. Then there was nothing but fury within his eyes. 

“Your first bleeding. Why didn’t you tell me about this?” Your whole body went on high alert as you looked at him. He was all but shaking with rage. The words wouldn’t leave your throat as fear settled within every nook of your body. 

“Answer me now.” He was baring his teeth at you, wings spreading out and chest puffing up. You shrank into yourself slowly under his gaze.

“It happened this morning, I didn’t know what was wrong. I am sorry.” You took the one step down and knelt before him. Wings sagging behind you and eyes gazing at the floor. You weren’t lying when you told him you had no idea what was happening. You had never been told of a first bleeding before. 

“You’re absolutely useless to me now. Go up to your room until I get you.” You hadn’t been prepared to be sent to your room. You’d normally receive your punishment immediately. It was typically a whipping with his belt or a couple of well placed kicks and punches to your body. 

You felt your breakfast from the morning coming up your throat as you stood and stalked up the stairs. Once you sat on your bed you stared at your wall for what felt like days but was really only a couple of hours. 

The trance you were in was broken as you heard your name being called through the house. You made quick work of going down the stairs and you went to kneel before your father again but he stopped you. The bile that you had finally choked down earlier threatened to come back up as he glared at you. He started walking towards the door and you stood in your place.

“Let’s go.” You hesitated at his words because you had never been allowed outside. From the day you were born all you had was the walls and rooms of your house. 

“I said let’s fucking go.” He stalked over to you and grabbed your hair roughly dragging you behind him. Your wings scraped against the floor as your legs stumbled beneath you to keep up right. The sharp chill of the breeze outside pierced the thin dress you wore and you hissed. You brought your hands up to your arms trying to rub heat into them. The snow seeped into the thin flats on your feet and chilled your toes instantly. 

You looked around and took in the sights of the camp you had only ever gazed upon from the windows in your house. No one was outside and that had you on edge even more than you already were. There was normally a slew of males drinking and rough housing at all hours. But right now it seemed everyone was inside. The wings on your back were twitching in agony at the sharp pricks of cold snapping at them. 

There was no sound to be heard other than your laboring breath and the curses from the male dragging you. The reality of the situation you were in finally set in as he dragged you closer to the trees. He pulled you through the foliage not doing anything to protect you against the lashing of the branches and leaves on your skin. You screamed as you hit a root in the ground and twisted your ankle, a loud crack ringing out through the silent night.

When you entered a clearing you noticed three males standing there. They all had wings but you didn’t recognize them as any of the males you had seen from the windows of your house. They didn’t even flinch at the way you were thrown to the ground before them. Your father spat at you as you cradled the wrist that had tried to catch you from your fall. 

“Do whatever you want to her. I don’t ever want to see her again.” His voice was pure venom as he directed the statement at the males. Before he promptly turned around and left the clearing.

Your eyes were wide and you pleaded with the males in front of you but they only laughed before one of them went to snatch you up. But you backed away from them as best you could with your injured leg and arm. That earned you a punch that went straight to your nose and cracked the bone efficiently. Blood sprayed out across your face and the ground and your head spun at the pain. 

You didn’t see the other one come up behind you. An arm wrapped around your neck and you clawed at the material of the shirt while you fought for your oxygen. He only squeezed harder even as your nails finally shredded his shirt and made contact with his skin. He brought you up and the tips of your now bare feet grazed the snow covered ground. Your vision blurred and you tried to let out a final plea but you couldn’t get a word out. The ache in your chest ebbed into a buzz throughout your body as your lungs continued to struggle. The last thing you heard before you passed out was the one that hadn’t approached you yet saying how much fun he was going to have with you. 

When you woke up, you gagged at the taste of blood in your mouth. You tried to open your eyes but they didn’t want to cooperate. It took you several more tries before they finally cracked open. You realized through the slits in your eyes that they were swollen. The dark room around you didn’t give you any clues as to where you were. But the laughing beyond the door gave you an idea. 

A loud scream ripped through your throat as you tried to stand. You looked down at your ankles and realized they were both shackled and the right one was swollen, bruised and had an odd angle to it. You tried to bring a hand down to your swollen ankle but noticed that they were also shackled and that your left wrist was in just about as poor condition as your ankle was. Your scream seemed to have garnered the attention of the Illyrians because the door was slamming open and light was flooding in. 

“Oh good, the bitch is awake.” You didn’t know where the voice was coming from as you squeezed your eyes shut. The light entering the room caused a sharp pain to throb through your head. 

“Now for that fun I talked about earlier.” You assumed he had a set of keys in his hand as you heard the sound of metal clanging together. Your suspicions were confirmed as you felt the shackles being unlocked from the floor. Two of them grabbed you under your armpits and started to drag you out to where they came from. You cracked your eyes open despite the light and tried to ignore the way the shackles pulled on your mangled wrist and ankle. 

The large table in the center of the room and the weapons lining the walls had you getting sick. The vomit mixed with the blood in your mouth and on your face and clothes as it came out of you. You heard one of the males next to you curse before a sharp pain radiated through your side. You glanced down and noticed there was a knife sticking out of your side. 

“Let’s get this done with. She’s fucking disgusting.” You figured you were even though you couldn’t see yourself. You knew there was blood and now vomit covering your face and clothes. You could feel blood pooling between your legs and down them. Your skin had tiny cuts and dirt and what not from being dragged through the forest and you were bruised in various places. 

“Get her on the table.” You tried once again to pull away from them but they only gripped you harder and the male that stabbed you twisted the knife. They picked you up and laid you face down on the table. Your nose smacked against the rough surface and you were sure they had broken it again. 

“What are you going to do?” Your question fell on deaf ears as they locked you down by your shackles and moved around the room. They all seemed perfectly in sync as they skirted around each other and handed each other different objects.

“Hold the half breed down. I’m gonna get started on the first one.” Your wings twitched at the words. Like they knew what was happening before you did. Pain shot through you with a vengeance as the first deep cut was made to your wing. You tried to push away the pain and fight but with the second deep cut you were succumbing to the black spots in your already hazy vision. 

The next time you opened your eyes you were numb. Every last part of you no longer feeling. You couldn’t feel the nasty cuts in your back were now laying bare on the dirty ground below you from where your wings were cut off. You couldn’t feel the snow seeping into your skin, the broken bones from earlier weren’t even a thought either as you stared up at the sun above you. A slow and cynical laugh left your lips as you realized this was the first time you had ever felt the sun on your skin. Because you couldn’t even feel the heat from it. 

A sound rang out somewhere near you but you couldn’t make it out as your ears rang. You hadn’t even noticed the blood that now poured down the sides of your neck and mixed in with your hair. Your eyes were still slits from the swelling when someone came and blocked the sun from your view. You blinked once and then twice, slowly as you tried to make out who was there. 

You watched their mouth move but couldn’t make out what they were saying. They came toward you and you couldn’t find it within you to fight them. Even when their wings finally came into view from where they stood tall and proud behind them. They knelt down beside you and hauled you into their arms. You didn’t feel any pain as they jostled you to adjust you better trying to avoid hitting the knife still lodged in your side. 

As you finally took in their face you realized it was a gorgeous female. You had never seen anyone as pretty as her, you decided. A small smile grazed your lips and you hoped this angel of death understood you were grateful for them before your eyes fluttered closed and you slipped into the darkness that had been fighting to consume you. 

A sob left your lips as you came back to your kitchen table. The males around the table looked at you in surprise and you shrunk into yourself but Mor was quick in standing up and gathering you into her arms, your legs wrapping around her middle. She smoothed a hand over your hair and laid a kiss on your forehead before whispering to her cousin and Azriel. You couldn’t understand what she was saying as your head was buried into her neck. 

She carried you to your room and laid you on your bed. You didn’t hear a door close but you felt a ripple of power through your apartment and figured that Rhysand must’ve winnowed away as Azriel slipped through his shadows. Mor carefully got you out of your day clothes and slipped you into a pair of sleep pants and a sleep shirt. She laid beside you once she was in similar attire and let you curl into her. She ran a hand up and down your back until you fell asleep with tear tracks down your face. Before you slipped into slumber you had uttered a sentence that rattled her bones. 

“I want the killing blows.”

A/N: I hope everyone enjoyed getting insight into readers past. There will be more Nesta and Cassian in the next part. Thank you all for reading and as always likes, comments, reblogs and follows are much appreciated.

Tags(open): @kmc1989 @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @luvmoo @wolfsbane44 @acourtofinkandpapyrus @moonlwghts @maddietheshoe @hyemishii @fanboyluvr @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @pinksmellslikelove @waytoomanyteenagefeels @littlebbb @cat-or-kitten @brandywineeeee

[ihopeinevergetsoberr]

Congrats on 100 followers!!!! and since ur taking requests to celebrate, maybe something with a sub!viktor x afab!reader? u usually write him more dom coded so i'd love to see your take on that!!

bless you for requesting this. i had the nicest little writing session working on it. i should write more sub!viktor for sure. cw: viktor is finally getting punished for being a fucking tease. unbeliavable. word count: 600~

He sharply exhales into the curve of your neck, eyes two sad watercolor spots devouring you from under their half-lidded cover. The angle is rather inconvenient for one small pleasure you still didn’t rid him of — for the past few days Viktor has been surviving purely on staring, and by now he’d become absolutely miserable — you turned the man into a shamefully perverted suitor, stealing glances at your cleavage whenever it appeared in his visual field. He’s rarely that touchy at work — which means that a once-sweet gentleman is now at the peak of his desperation; arms wrapped around your waist, lips a warm tender pout against your shoulder, kisses hot enough to be palpable through the fabric of your blouse. Has you gasping, hands gripping the edge of his desk for support. 

“Are you feeling merciful today, by any chance?” he quietly inquires into your ear, eager to deliver a sloppy stroke on that one spot with his nimble tongue. Poor thing hasn’t been taken care of in days — cock a painful swell in his unbearably tight pants. He tries not to act too invasive, but it presses into your hip nonetheless — heavy, hot, and asking for your touch.

“That depends,” you huff out a laugh, effortlessly escaping the cage of his embrace. He swallows a groan of frustration, fingers squeeze the cane so hard he might as well just bend its sturdy handle. 

“Why must you persecute me with those vague answers?” he sighs, bright head pleadingly tilted to the side. It’s a refreshing turnover — once a tease and a smartmouth now pitifully obedient. Oh just what a few cruel sexless days do to charming brats. 

“Plainly because you haven’t earned a clear one yet,” you’re all but laughing into his face, but he doesn’t protest your mockery — oh the things he’d sacrifice to sprawl you out on his desk, tongue an agile little swirl inside your cunt — use me, fuck me, let me please you. But he prefers to address this in his own way. 

He responds by setting his cane aside, limping leg a trembling unstable thing without its support. You arch a confused eyebrow, but he doesn’t let you stay puzzled for much longer, blessing you with a pleasure of watching him sink down to his knees — a little clumsy and rather uncoordinated, yet still beautiful, and you gawk at the devotion of copper eyes looking into yours with promising yielding. 

“Viktor, what are you doing?” you hiss, evidently worried about the not exactly private setting of his workshop. But it doesn’t bother him in the slightest — the possibility of getting caught with his face buried under your skirt is certainly not something he’s fearful of. Cold hand directs the back of your palm closer to his lips, and he lingers there — mouth hovered about your knuckles before a kiss.

“I’ve grown so desperate for you,” he whispers — oh the mouthy bastard — and a chaste peck caresses your hand, forcing your breath to hitch. 

“I understand, but-“

“I’m begging you to reconsider the punishment,” he utters, meaning every word — and you’d gladly ride his face until he’s a breathless mess for the pure way he’s staring up, seeking your pity. “The lines I’d cross for your touch — if only you would have me. Please.”

He doesn’t dare to snake his other hand up your legs — he’s waiting for permission, and it might just be the death of you — your sweet, sweet man, who is definitely going to deservedly cum tonight. 

But that's your entertainment for later. 

Your fingers caress the line of his chin, and he leans into your little clemency with a thankful whimper. 

“And you promise not to get us caught?”

“Consider this whim fulfilled. As well as whatever other whims you might have in store for me.” 

[band--psycho]

Jax Teller x Reader-A Blast From The Past

Requested by @thaliastregona with the prompt angsty valentines day!

Check out the stories so far

It was so hard to stop this drabble at 500 words!

I hope you all enjoy this! 💛

Worry washed over Y/n as she sat alone in the busy restaurant. Y/b/f was never late, to anything. He was usually the opposite; which worked because so was she. 

In the few months they’d been together it had become a sort of competition to see how early they could get to places. 

At first Y/n thought she was just earlier than him, but it was now thirty minutes since their booking and still there was no sign of him, no call, no text, nothing, even though she’d called him twice. 

She was just about to leave when she saw the waitress who seated her, walking towards the table. But when she noticed who was behind her, she wished she had left. 

Because it wasn’t Y/b/n who was walking behind the waitress, it was Jax Teller.

Jackson fucking Teller.

In a suit….

“Sorry I’m late, darlin’,” he said, leaning over to place a quick  kiss on Y/n's cheek, before sitting down in the chair opposite her. 

Y/n was seething. 

If looks could kill, Jax would be dead right there. 

Why was he here? 

How did he know she was here?

“What the fuck are you doing here?” She hissed, the venom evident in her voice. 

“I didn’t want you to be alone on Valentine’s Day,” he answered back, picking up a menu.

“I’m not alone my date should be arriving any minute now,” 

Y/n stated, hoping that her words might somehow scare Jax off, but, of course it didn’t. 

Instead, it made a smile form on his face. 

A dark smile. 

One that sent a chill down Y/ns spine. 

“I don’t think he will be,”

It was at that moment, realization dawned on her. 

He’d done something to Y/b/f and that’s why he wasn’t here tonight and Jax was.  

“What’ve you done?” 

“I haven’t done anything,” he said innocently, but Y/n knew he had done something  to Y/b/f, even if he wasn’t the one who actually did it.

She’d known Jax from when she lived in Charming, when she was in her early twenties; they fell in love…or she thought they did, she certainly fell for him. Hard. 

But he broke her heart; so she left Charming, and built a new life for herself.

She moved on. 

Now here he was, sitting in front of her, looking at her, like they’d never broken up. Like he wasn’t the reason why they broke up, five years ago today. 

“What do you want?”

“You,”

Y/n hated how her heart skipped a beat at his answer. It shouldn’t have. 

She was with Y/b/f, she was happy with him, she truly  liked him and could see herself falling in love with him. 

But Jax…he had this hold on Y/n; maybe it was because he was her first proper love…but as much as her mind was screaming at her to leave, for some reason she just couldn’t.

Tagging:

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[songofsoma]

all roads lead to you

one // two // three

pairing: karlach x f!tav words: 2,763

read on ao3

chapter three | the spinner's siphouse

Over the next two weeks, routine set in.  

Every morning she would wake up with the sun with the others. They would sit and have their breakfast of whatever Gale decided to throw together, chatting about mundane things like what needed to be done today and who would do what. 

Karlach was often tasked with things that needed to be hauled around. It was only natural she was deemed the glorified pack mule with her bulging muscles. Honestly, she didn’t mind. She liked the way it made her body feel tired at the end of the day. It was evidence that she had done something. 

Besides, it often landed her in the stables or with the horses which just so happened to be close to where Daefina usually was. 

Today was no different. 

Her task was hauling hay bales out to the pasture feeders to refill them. For the one way out in the cattle pastures, she had saddled up Guy to help her pull a cart with the round bale. It had been easy enough to drop it in and secure the gates. The hard part was the swarm of cattle that tried to eat the damned thing while she was still carrying it. 

What those beasts would do for a nice, fresh thing of hay Karlach didn’t want to know. 

She left them to it as quickly as she could and pulled the empty cart back to the barn. 

Lucky for her, the other two were closer. That meant she could turn Guy loose again so he could graze nearby while she finished lugging the rest of the hay. 

By the time she balanced the last bale on her back, hands clinging to the ropes that held the thing together, she could feel sweat making her shirt stick to her back. 

She trudged by where Guy watched her to the nearby feeder. They didn’t have nearly as many horses as they did cattle, so the one feeder would last them a while. 

Karlach tossed the bale into the metal fencing before grabbing the knife clipped to her belt and cutting the ties and pulling them out. The neatly packed cube fell apart, but would still need to be spread out. 

That would wait a minute. What she needed now was a little relief. 

Karlach tossed her hat to the ground briefly so she could pull her sweat-stained shirt over her head to leave her top half bare. She mopped her face with the damp fabric as best she could before plopping her hat back on her head. 

It was instantly much better. She could feel the breeze chill her skin as it dried the sweat. Goosebumps even raised along the tattooed and gnarled skin of her arms. 

She slung the shirt over her shoulder and made for the barn to grab a pitchfork when a sharp whistle stopped her. 

Turning, she saw Daefina leaning against the outside of the fence. She had Shadowheart with her today, the girl from that religious cult who insisted on dressing in all black no matter how warm the weather was. Maybe it was because it matched the hue of the braided ponytail that swung as she walked.

“Morning, Karlach. Didn’t think I’d get a show this early in the day,” Daefina called.

Something about her words always made Karlach’s face grow hot. “Sorry, Miss. I can put it back on if it makes you uncomfortable.”

“No,” Shadowheart spoke up, resting her chin on her hand as she watched her. “I quite like this view.”

She could hear Daefina giggle beside her. “I wanted to ask if you were coming tonight?”

Karlach took a few steps closer to them so they didn’t have to shout. “Coming where?”

“The Siphouse. The saloon in town.”

She had heard Astarion mention something about that this morning. “Oh, fuck yeah. I could go for a good pint—” Realizing her bad mouth she snapped it shut with wide eyes. “Sorry, Miss.”

Bemused, Daefina smiled. “Why are you apologizing? Don’t you know I was raised on a farm? But good, I’ll save you a seat next to me. And maybe even have a damn good pint waiting for you.” She patted the top rail of the fence before she and Shadowheart headed back to the house and left Karlach staring, open-mouthed in disbelief. 

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

Karlach hadn’t been back into town since she first rode in almost a month ago. Work on the farm kept her busy. Besides, there hasn’t been a reason. The Greensongs fed her, housed her, paid her well, and had even scrounged up a few extra clothes to give her since she had ridden in with only the ones on her back. 

The one thing Karlach had wanted to do was thank the drow barkeeper for pointing her in the right direction. Tonight would finally be her chance to do so. 

She looked up at the gold lettering of the sign hung above the door, The Spinner’s Siphouse written below a spider whose legs expanded to form the shape of a goblet. It’s where her new life began. She was glad it was the most popular bar in town. 

The dark, weathered wood gave the place an eerie feeling as if it’s been sitting here for ages. Its tall and narrow windows were designed in a way that made the metal detailing on the glass look like webbing. Warm candlelight spilled through the windows and onto the street, inviting passersby to come in despite the almost creepy exterior. It was a sharp contrast to the odd torches clearly made to resemble egg-sacs hanging from the posts lining the walkway and the front entrance.

Minthara must really enjoy spiders. Creepy. But thinking back on the drow, it made sense. 

Karlach mounted the steps and pushed through the doors. It was busier inside than the last time she had been here. The warm, amber lighting filtered over the crowd that swarmed the large bar. Of course, there was Minthara taking drink orders. She seemed at ease in the chaos. 

There were a couple of other staff running around. Cain, a large half-drow, who she knew as Minthara’s wife, lugged in a new keg to put behind the bar. Her thanks was a finger slipped through the collar-like necklace around Cain’s throat to yank her down for a kiss before Minthara turned back to the patrons. 

Then there was the barmaid. A purple-skinned tiefling with hair as dark as night draped over her shoulders in two long braids. Her tail swished as she dodged around the crowd, a tray of tankards and goblets balanced on one hand. 

This time, Karlach really looked around. The walls were decorated with paintings and tapestries of spiders in different forms. It suited the deep red wallpaper and dark wooden table tops etched and filled with gold paint to look like webs. 

An arm looped through hers and she stared wide-eyed down at Shadowheart who was grinning. “There you are! Fina was beginning to think you were skipping out on us!” Karlach could smell the alcohol on her breath. Paired with the slight slur of her words, she could tell they had started earlier. 

“Are you drunk already?” she mused, allowing herself to be led to where the rest of the group was. 

Shadowheart gasped and looked at her as if she had just asked the most ridiculous question. “I am not!” she claimed. The stumble of her gait didn’t help her case. “Just feeling very good.”

Karlach cleared her throat as she did her best to ignore the flirty strokes of fingers on her arm. 

“But if I do get too drunk, at least you’re strong enough to throw me over your shoulder and carry me home.”

Luckily she was saved from answering by the arrival to the table. 

Their large group was situated in one of the corners. A couple of tables had been pushed together to make room for the six of them, something she was sure Minthara had been thrilled about. Gale and Astarion had been crammed into the corner, most likely Lae’zel’s doing, who had plenty of room at the end of one table, if she had to guess. Daefina was flanked by two empty chairs and her eyes lit up upon seeing them approach. 

“Found her!” Shadowheart announced as she fell into one of the chairs beside Daefina. 

“And here I thought you were standing me up,” she teased, resting her elbows on the table. “Have a seat, your beer is getting warm.”

Karlach did as she was told, avoiding the curious looks and raised eyebrows the others were giving her. Immediately, a tankard was slid in front of her. 

She lifted it, surprised to still find it cold. 

“Magic comes in handy more ways than one.” Daefina winked having seen the look on her face. 

The barmaid from before sauntered over with a tray of fresh drinks for the others. Her low-cut top left little to the imagination, especially as she bent over to place the goblets and tankards on the etched tabletop.

She set her sights on the wizard, wearing a smile that could only be described as coquettish. “And yours, Mr. Ancunin, Mr. Dekarios,” she purred, bending down in a way that seemed purposeful when her bosom pressed into Gale’s face as she reached over him to pass Astarion his drink. 

The entire table snickered as she left with another wink, leaving Gale the same shade of red as Karlach’s skin. 

“You think she likes him?” Karlach asked with a chuckle to no one in particular.

“Oh, Tiss? She fauns over Gale.” Daefina picked up her mug with a grin. “Has since the day Minthy hired her.”

“And yet he has yet to grow the balls to ask her on a date,” Shadowheart added with a roll of her eyes. 

Gale huffed, “Can we please cease discussing the size of my testicles? I’ll have you know they’re an adequate size, thank you.”

“Well, maybe they’re a tad small compared to the rest of you,” Astarion said, resting a cheek in his hand to look at his neighbor. “Considering its size in relation to—”

Lae’zel hawked in disgust and annoyance. “You Fae-run men are so…underequipped compared to us Githyanki.” No one bothered to point out her mispronunciation of the region. Instead, Daefina and Shadowheart shared amused glances. “I’ve seen what both of you have to offer and, might I say, it isn’t much.” 

The smirk that played on her lips quickly hidden by her glass told Karlach her words were intentional as the men gaped at her. 

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

To say a large portion of the group was trashed would be putting it lightly. Supremely and utterly fucked up would’ve done it more justice. 

Lae’zel marched Gale and Astarion’s stumbling figures out of the Siphouse, rolling her eyes as they hung onto each other in an attempt to keep upright. 

“Sk’va, leave it to your men to be the weaklings,” she hissed with arms crossed. 

“Shadowheart is down too,” Daefina mused, gesturing the the girl passed out in Karlach’s arms. 

“Yes, but I expect weakness from her.”

Daefina snorted and Karlach’s brows raised as the Githyanki turned her back to them to continue ushering the drunks out of the bar. 

“There some sort of bad blood there?” Karlach asked, adjusting Shadowheart in her grip. She really weighed nothing compared to the bales of hay she tossed or the other shit she carried around. 

“Shadowheart doesn’t like Githyanki for stereotypical reasons, Lae’zel just doesn’t like Shadowheart. Frankly,” she added, a mischievous glint in her eye, “I think they don’t like obvious sexual tension between them.”

Karlach sputtered, unsure of what exactly to say. That only made Daefina giggle. 

As they made to leave the saloon, Minthara stopped her. Daefina was yelling something to Lae’zel through the open door and hadn’t noticed. 

She expected a scolding for being too rowdy or being the last to leave. Instead, Minthara said, “There was someone who came through town asking about you.”

Karlach’s mouth went dry and her blood ran cold. “Who?” she asked, the word coming out in a broken whisper. 

“Didn’t get his name.” Minthara leaned back against the bar. “Human man, dark skin, one good eye, a silly needle of a rapier on his hip asking if I’d seen a one-horned devil named Karlach come through here. He was wearing a pin with the Frontiers’ sigil on it.”

The Frontiers. Notoriously known bounty hunters. Someone had put a target on her back. It wasn’t hard to figure out who. 

“What’d you say?” She swallowed hard. She had just gotten this new life. She didn’t want to keep running. Life on the run was exhausting. 

“I told him there were no devils in Baldur’s Gate.” Minthara crossed her arms, the lean muscle of her purple forearms pronounced in the low candlelight. 

Relief flooded through her. Minthara hadn’t given her up for whatever reason. “I’m not what he says I am, Minthara,” she said finally. 

“I would hardly care if you were,” she chuckled, though it had a more serious tone than a jovial one. “I don’t give up my clientele.”

Karlach met back up with Daefina after thanking Minthara for everything—for the job recommendation and not ratting her out to a bounty hunter. Daefina had been the only one to linger, Lae’zel was making a soldier march out of the boys she learned. 

They walked mostly in silence. The sun had long since dipped below the horizon so only the light of the moon and stars guided their path. 

For once, Karlach didn’t mind not talking. Her head was full of scenarios of some bounty hunter trying to either drag her back to Zauriel or kill her. It would be the latter. She’d never go back. Not alive. Another part of her worried that this man would harm her friends. The thought alone was enough to make her stomach twist. 

“Thank you, by the way, for carrying her.” Daefina finally said, breaking the silence and peering up at her. 

Honestly, Karlach had forgotten she had precious cargo. Shadowheart wasn’t much effort to carry and she’d been too much in her own head to notice the extra weight. 

“No problem,” she replied, a little too quick and with a smile a little too tight. 

Daefina had noticed and her lips tipped into a frown. “Are you alright? Is she too heavy? I can drag her if you—”

“No!” She took a deep breath, trying to quell her nerves. “No, it’s fine. I’m fine. Really, better than I have been in a long time. I just…I just hope it stays that way.”

Her face still read of confusion, not knowing what to make of the words. Then, she set a hand on Karlach’s arm, fingers barely able to curl over a bicep. “If you need anything, I’m here. All you have to do is ask.”

“Thanks, Fina.” Karlach stilled at her use of a nickname. Usually, she always called her Miss Greensong or Daefina, never ‘Fina.’ Were they on a nickname basis? Oh, Gods, had she fucked up? 

Daefina only gave her a toothy grin. “Anytime, Sparky.”

Her face flushed, the deepening of her already red cheeks hopefully hidden in the moonlight. 

The rest of the way was, thankfully, uneventful. She’d left Shadowheart on a chaise in one of the front rooms as directed by Daefina who stood on the front porch with her now. 

“I’ll let her sleep it off there. I don’t feel like cleaning vomit out of my rug upstairs,” she joked, leaning against a column. 

Karlach chuckled. “Fair enough. I should be turning in as well, the sun is going to rise in a few hours and the rest of them will be hungover and blowing chunks in the field.” 

She wrinkled her nose in disgust but laughed. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

Karlach took the hat off her head and bowed her head. “‘Night Miss Greensong.”

“You can’t Miss Greensong me after you just nicknamed me. Tell me correctly,” she pouted with hands on her hips. 

Her eyes widened but she said, “Goodnight, Fina.” The words sounded foreign to her own ears. 

Daefina stretched up on her tiptoes with a smile and planted a soft kiss on Karlach’s cheek. “Goodnight, Karlach.”

She left her standing on the front steps with the sweep of her skirt, dumbfounded and dazed on her entire walk back to the barn with not a thought about a bounty hunter in sight. 

[honey-beann]

Ruiner, Ruination (RK900 x Reader)

Chapter 4: The Little Mouse and the Metal Machine Part II - Falling

Series Masterlist

Chapter Synopsis:

Part two of a two part special that tells the tale of the very first time Reader and Nines were recognized for their exceptional teamwork (under all the wrong circumstances).

In this part, everyone's favorite duo works together to contextualize the evidence discovered thus far, coming to multiple unpleasant realizations in the process, one of which may just end up ending someone's life entirely.

AKA: Nines experiences fear, Reader puts herself in danger, and Reed actually helps with the investigation for a minute or two.

Chapter Content Warnings:

Mentions of death

Mentions of murder

Mentions of torture

Mild Gore

Mentions of android self harm

Blood

Word Count: 5,459

"It is blank for yourself and Detective Reed, Little Mouse, but not for me."

A blush rose to your cheeks at the unfamiliar nickname, and you sputtered out a response just moments later, confusion and embarrassment evident in your tone,

"L-Little Mouse?"

You asked, your voice cracking a bit as the android in front of you chuckled, a smooth and dark sound that almost made you shiver.

"I thought it was suitable. Similar to a mouse, you are both fragile yet strangely resilient. I thought this might satisfy your desire to have me call you something besides Detective."

You glared up at him, resisting the urge to call him out for his obvious satisfaction about the fact that he had both given you what you wanted while also ceaselessly mocking you for your biological inferiority.

"I have a name you know."

You grumbled back, cheeks still tinted pink as you looked away from your partner, trying to ignore the obvious amusement he was experiencing due to your reaction.

"Of course you do, Detective, and I know it well, But wasn't it you who insisted on giving me a nickname just weeks ago? Am I not allowed to do the same? That does not seem very equal to me."

You swallowed thickly in response to your partners words, his teasing tone making your skin feel warm as your heart beat faster in your chest.

How was he able to switch up on you so quickly?

Desperate to change the subject before your heart gave out, you cleared your throat awkwardly, letting the nickname slide for the time being as you tried to refocus on the case at hand.

"So, you're saying you can see something Reed and I can't? Like invisible ink for androids?"

Nines rolled his eyes at your words, amusement still evident in his tone as he replied shortly thereafter,

"Exactly like invisible ink detective, because it appears Gwyneth was using her own blue blood to write in her diary. This was most likely to ensure her guardians were unable to read it, as it details many of their abhorrent behaviors."

"Like what?"

You asked before you could stop yourself, watching as your partner turned back to the beginning of the diary, searching through a few pages before he began reading, voice low and smooth,

"Eric and Elizabeth beat the twins for speaking to one another today. They will probably be staying home from school for a few days until Eric's strange companion, Scott can repair them, because the identical gashes across their cheeks are showing their inner facial components and false teeth. Eric and Elizabeth are angry about this, and are blaming the twins for having made them so angry. I miss Logan, it's hard to take care of the girls without his help. He always made everything feel better. I think that's why they killed him before the rest of us. I hear them talking about how they like to watch us squirm when they think we're all in stasis mode. I know what they plan to do with us."

The entry was dated as just over three months prior, and as Nines turned a few pages forward you immediately knew what was to come.

"They killed Hallie and Charlotte tonight. I knew that it was coming, but there was nothing I could do to stop them. They pulled them out of the room like I wasn't even here, kicking and screaming, begging to be let go of, pleading for me to save them. I heard them screaming my name, along with Logan's well into the night, even after their vocal modulators started to give out from wear. I don't think I will ever forget the way they sounded after that, inhuman and yet so full of fear. I know deep down that something is wrong with all of this, but I can't bring myself to be afraid. I was created to obey and love Eric and Elizabeth, and I'm not sure what other options I could possibly have besides continuing to do so. I know they'll kill me too, I heard them talking about it at the end of the night, but I don't even think I'm capable of dying. Still, I keep finding myself wanting to whisper into the darkness and hear Charlotte and Hallie's voices whisper back. Logan's too, although I think I got used to not hearing him anymore a long time ago. I will miss my sisters."

This entry was dated for around three months ago, and you cringed upon hearing the gory details of the twins' murders.

Nines must have noticed this, because he was quiet for a few moments after reading that entry, staring down at you for a few more seconds before he flipped forward further until he once again found the page he was looking for,

"I hear them wherever I go. Charlotte, Hallie, and even Logan whisper in my ears when I'm alone, and I can't handle it anymore. I thought the silence without them was hard, but this is so much worse. They keep trying to convince me to do such terrible things to Eric and Elizabeth, begging me in those inhuman voices to do something to them before they can me. They told me that they buried their extra parts beneath the floor within their bedroom, too. I want to check for myself, but I'm afraid that I might actually find something there. I don't want the voices to be right, but they feel so real that I don't think there's any other possibility."

This entry was dated just five days after the previous one, and to your surprise, Nines closed the notebook after he was finished reading it.

You looked up at him, confused about his sudden disinterest in continuing, and he replied almost immediately.

"That is all you need to hear from her. I will tell you the rest as it is pertinent to do so."

You glared at your partner, about to argue when he turned and left the room, walking a bit down and back across the hall in order to reenter the dreaded master suite.

You swallowed thickly, trying not to breathe in through your nose for fear of that dreaded mechanical scent as you moved to stand in the doorway, confused as to what Nines was doing until he reopened the doors to the closet, the same ones you had gazed through earlier before noting how empty it was in there.

If only you had known how wrong you were.

You watched, finding yourself unable to look away as Nines knelt down to closely analyze the floor, his eyes shifting upward to find your own for the briefest of moments before he reached down and slid a heavy piece of metal covered in well camouflaged carpet over to the side. He appeared to be looking downward for a few seconds after this, although you didn't dare approach to see if you were correct about that, not until he turned to look over at you once more, his gaze lingering this time.

"May I borrow your flashlight, Detective?"

Swallowing thickly, you nodded, removing said device from your tool belt before taking a few steps forward and tossing it to your partner, who caught it with incredible ease despite the shakiness of your throw.

Under different circumstances, you would have very likely been impressed.

But right now, you were just trying to remind yourself to breathe through your mouth alone, desperately attempting to ignore the metallic taste that filled your mouth each time that you did.

God, this place was hell.

Nervously, you and a great deal of your coworkers watched as Nines aimed the flashlight's beam towards the square shaped hole in the floor, his expression unchanged even as he gazed at the sight within.

For a few seconds, there was only silence as he leaned back on his heels, flicking off the light before he stood up and walked away from the hole entirely. You were just about to ask him if he'd found anything when he spoke up on his own,

"The three android corpses within that hidden compartment and the fingerprints that are present on them will serve as evidence that Eric and Elizabeth Hughes did in fact murder their own adopted children. I would recommend having someone from forensics and the coroners office come to prepare the remains for transport. They are not in good condition, as it is apparent they sustained a great deal of damage prior to their deactivation."

You felt sadness and discomfort well up in you as Nines confirmed your suspicions regarding what he had found there, walking back towards you in order to request your support away from the scene once more, his cold hand pressing your flashlight back into your palm once he was close enough. The feeling of the cool black metal, ever so slightly warmed by the previously shining bulb encased within it, brought you back to earth a bit, and you sighed before agreeing to follow your partner, even if you knew deep down that whatever he had to tell you couldn't be good.

You were right.

When Nines pulled you away from your coworkers as they prepared the android bodies for transit, he hardly even waited until you were standing at the end of the empty hallway to tell you what he believed to be the truth of the case: That Gwyneth had murdered her guardians.

He told you about what he'd found towards the end of the diary, pages upon pages of rambling describing how the little girl planned to murder the people who were supposed to have been her caretakers. She talked about bleeding them out in the bathtub the way they'd done to her siblings, of burying them beneath the floor boards just as they'd done to Logan, Hallie, and Charlotte.

She had never outright admitted to killing her parents in the diary, but Nines told you that he had absolutely no doubt that she had done exactly as she said she would, first going after Elizabeth downstairs in the kitchen, where the oldest of the blood had been found, before dragging her over to the bathroom to torture and drain her of her blood the exact same way she and her husband had done to Gwyneth's siblings. After that, Nines believed she had gone upstairs to where Eric had likely been resting, and stabbed him until he was unable to fight back. He was unsure what she had used as her weapon, but due to the lack of forensic evidence on the tools in the bathroom, and the neat way they had been arranged, he stated he had little doubt they had been the murder weapons. He then told you of his theory that Gwyneth had used a bloodied blanket that had been found inside the downstairs bathroom to transport a barely alive Eric down the stairs and into the tub without making a mess.

It all made sense, and you couldn't help but hate it.

Whenever the victim turned to something like this, to killing other people, you always felt like a failure. Where had the justice system been when it came to protecting this little girl? Why hadn't anyone noticed sooner how horrifically abused these children were being?

It was all so unfair.

But what Nines told you next felt even worse.

He told you about the number in the downstairs closet, of the implications it had when it came to the immense amounts of thirium that had once been present within this household. Due to the less than pleasant nature of the family, as well as the shady phone number, and the lack of thirium present within the drainage system of the home, Nines suspected that Eric and Elizabeth had sold it for the production of red ice, and that the burner phone number was probably a contact for getting rid of it.

They had abused their children, tortured them, taken their lives, buried their bodies beneath metal and carpeting, and then sold their blood to be used for drug production.

Somehow, it just kept getting worse and worse.

Seeing your obvious emotional response to his words, Nines' expression changed subtly, just enough so that a few officers present at the other end of the hallway stared at the sight of it, shocked at what they were seeing.

You, on the other hand, didn't seem to notice, far too wrapped up in everything you had learned.

But unfortunately, Nines wasn't done yet, proceeding to request a gathering in the downstairs living area of the home in order to update everyone on his theory.

By the time he was done speaking, not even the infamously argumentative Gavin Reed himself took issue with his thoughts regarding the evidence as it was currently known, and everyone was silent, until finally, one of the many officers who had been initially dispatched to the scene spoke up.

"Well, what are you proposing we do about the perpetrator then? Do we send out her image and name even though there are thousands of others just like her?"

Nines shook his head at that, immediately responding,

"Well, the good and bad news about the Hughes' android children is that they were all custom built, which was how they were able to enroll them in school without anyone knowing they were androids. This means that if we needed to alert the media, there would be a fairly reasonable chance she might one day be recognized by someone. The bad part of this is that if they had not been custom built, none of this ever could have occurred as easily in the first place."

The officer nodded in understanding, before you spoke up for the first time in a long time, and almost everyone in the room noticed the way that Nines shifted his body to face you immediately upon hearing your voice, a furrow of what almost appeared to be concern appearing above his brow as he took in what you were saying.

He had looked almost notably worried for a while now, as if your emotional distress was an immense concern rather than a slight setback.

"You're talking like we won't need to alert the media. Does that mean you think we can find her with the evidence we already have alone?"

Nines hummed, a spark of what was almost like pride flickering within him as you caught on easily to his earlier words. His lips were curled at the edges as he replied,

"I do, and that is exactly why I wished to speak to everyone here at once. Due to the evidence I have of the perpetrator, I know for a fact that the chances that she has left this house are slim to none. That being said, I also know the entire layout of this home from having downloaded current and past floor plans and blue prints, and there doesn't seem to be anywhere she could be hiding where we would not have already located her. Does anyone have any suggestions?"

Everything was completely silent until suddenly, Gavin spoke up from the other side of the living room,

"I might have a lead."

Five minutes later, everyone was standing upstairs in the scarcely decorated children's bedroom, crowding around the window.

"This was open when I got here."

Reed explained, his arms crossed as he avoided eye contact with the android who was standing in front of him,

"I asked the cops who were first to the scene, and they said they hadn't even been up here to open the window at all."

The RK900 model nodded in response, looking over to you before he turned his gaze back towards the window, noting that there was almost no available ground to stand on outside of this portion of the house due to a fence, therefore making it difficult for someone to go outside and look at what was visible from below.

Well then, clearly he would need to get creative in his approach.

He turned towards you fully now, his voice clear and highly confident as he spoke,

"Detective, hold my legs, I am going to get a picture of the above area on this side of the house."

You raised your brows in response, but did as your partner asked, allowing him to get situated with his back against the wooden window sill before he slowly began easing himself outside further, keeping his torso upright without any support in a manner that would have been nearly impossible for any human being.

You grasped Nines' body by the calves, both arms wrapped around them as you did your best to ensure he wouldn't fall out the window due to any potential external pressures.

It was a stressful job.

"Nines?"

You called out after a few moments, hearing a dull click before a chuckle came from outside of the window,

"Yes, Little Mouse?"

You felt your face burn in embarrassment as multiple of your coworkers murmured to one another upon hearing the condescending nickname.

God, this was humiliating.

"Are you almost done? This is making me nervous."

That chuckle came again, much closer this time, and the calves beneath your arms bent in a manner that let you know Nines had sat up once more.

You looked up at him in obvious surprise, dropping your arms from around his legs seconds later as he looked down at you, clearly amused at your previous unnecessary concerns,

"Whatever for, Detective? Were you worried about me?"

His tone was serious, but had a mocking lilt to it that made you glare up at your partner, crossing your arms,

"More like worried about me. You're a three million dollar piece of equipment, Nines, and it would have been my ass if you fell two stories and needing replacing for it."

Humming, your partner lowered himself back inside fully, standing tall and proud above you as he brushed the dirt from the window sill off of his uniform,

"Whatever you say, Detective."

Not long afterward, yourself and the rest of your coworkers were sitting all around the room, analyzing the photo that Nines had taken with great interest and confusion.

Above the window Nines had taken the photo from by using his ocular cameras, it was apparent that there was in fact another story to the house, something you and Nines had been aware of already.

But, what was interesting was the fact that leading up to the rather small window, large pieces of metal could be seen sticking out of the house, almost like they had been placed there by someone in an effort to reach the window a full story above.

"If Gwyneth is anywhere in this house, it's there."

Nines said matter of factly, and everyone turned to face him as he spoke,

"The only thing we need to do now is send someone up there to check it out."

Everyone was silent, none of them particularly eager to go and risk meeting a potentially homicidal little android girl in a dark attic that hadn't been touched by any human being for decades.

And on top of that, there was the whole other issue of the size of the window. No grown man would fit through that easily, least of all the RK900 who was arguably most suited for this particular job. Nines was a big guy, standing at over six feet tall with incredibly broad shoulders that could never dream of fitting into such a small space, especially not when no part of his body could be considered even the least bit pliable.

Nines had not been made to be soft, to mold himself to fit into particular spaces, he was supposed to create those spaces regardless of risk.

But this was not his original task, and this was not something he could brute force his way into.

Someone else would have to go up there, and they would have to do it alone.

"I'll do it." you said, your voice small but confident even as you shook a bit while standing to meet your partners harsh and scrutinizing gaze.

Nines watched you, looking you up and down slowly before he sighed, glancing about the room as if waiting for someone else, anyone else to volunteer.

Nobody did.

He sighed.

"Are you sure you're up for this?"

He asked, approaching you slowly, running scan after scan to check your vitals in an effort to discern fully whether or not this was a good idea.

But no matter what he did, there was no answer he could find that was entirely certain and without risk.

And he hated that.

"This case seems to have shaken you, Detective. I do not want you to take any unnecessary risks. The entire case could be jeopardized based upon your actions."

His words were very normal for him, so very Nines in nature, but the worry within his gaze was not. He didn't want you to take such a huge risk unless you felt confident you could come out the other side unscathed.

You nodded in response to his words,

"I'm sure, Nines. Let me do this."

Your partner watched you, his jaw clenching and unclenching repeatedly until finally, he relented,

"As you wish, Detective. We will aim to have you heading up within the hour. Please prepare yourself accordingly."

Nines spoke like he intended to have no involvement with said preparation, but for the next thirty five minutes he spent every moment of his time going over plans with you, creating back up plan after back up plan for probability after probability until you had the audacity to compare him to his predecessor due to his obvious anxiety pertaining to your success.

That had shut him up until your final five minutes prior to your journey, which was when he came to present you with his gun.

You had never really told anyone, but you didn't like to carry a lethal weapon on you during work hours unless you were instructed to. Nines knew that, and was evidently all too aware of the fact that you'd arrived on the scene today weaponless. But rather than chastising you for that, as he had done many times in the past, he simply held out his gun, watching as you accepted it gingerly, holstering it away with a nod of appreciation.

You didn't know what to say.

Since becoming your partner, Nines had accidentally become one of the most important people in your life.

You saw him nearly every single day, and whether he considered the two of you to be close or not, you had actually started to think of him as a friend rather than just your partner.

Even still, you couldn't bring yourself to say that to his face, no matter how scary the situation at hand happened to be.

You were just about to try and get something, anything out when Nines spoke up,

"You will make it out of this unharmed, Detective."

His tone was stern and certain as he spoke, his grey eyes hardened in a way that may have actually frightened you just a few weeks prior.

But now?

Now it was all too familiar to make you feel anything but strangely at ease.

He continued a few seconds later, his expression remaining ever unchanged,

"I swear it. I will not allow anything bad to happen to you. Not now, and not in the future. That is the promise I made as your partner, and I intend to keep it."

You smiled up at Nines, the first one he had seen in a few hours, and he watched as you reached your hand out, grabbing one of his as it lay limply at his side to grasp it within your own, a sign of strength and confidence that was almost able to put him at ease.

Almost.

"I trust you, Nines."

You said, and you could have sworn you saw that hardened stare soften for a moment before he blinked that tenderness away in favor of his usual harsh expression.

Your partner nodded in response to your words, a small smile appearing at the edges of his lips as he replied earnestly,

"And I you, Little Mouse."

There was silence between the two of you for a few moments before you both let go of one another's hands, allowing the peace and quiet to permeate the environment before Nines spoke up once more, his voice a bit softer than the last time he had given you instructions pertaining to your mission,

"I will be on the ground below along with everyone else currently present. If you need anything at all, just call for me. I will hear it. We removed the fence to ensure there is enough room for everybody to remain safely outside the premises so no one will be of your concern."

You nodded softly, swallowing thickly as you glanced outside to see your coworkers on the grass below, anxiously awaiting your ascent to the abandoned attic.

It was now or never.

You looked back to Nines, giving him one last nervous smile before you made your way over to the window. You sat there on the windowsill, listening to your peers chat below, until you saw the familiar form of your partner stride outside to stand with them, giving you the signal to head upward. You gave him a stern nod in response, and stood at the edge of the sill, grasping on to one of the sturdy metal rungs that had been stuck into the side of the house and pulling yourself upward.

You repeated this process of slowly moving up until finally, you reached the window, which you could now see was slightly ajar. Praying that the age of the noticeably warped wood wouldn't cause it to squeak and give you away, you pushed the window the rest of the way up slowly before making your way inside feet first in the very same manner that your partner had instructed you to less than an hour before. Allowing the fading natural light to guide your way, you slowly pressed forward into the dusty attic, fear welling up inside you as the silence took over all other sounds.

It was far too quiet in here. And you didn't feel nearly as alone as you'd hoped you would.

"Hello? Gwyneth? Are you there?"

The sound of your voice in the tense silence surprised you, and you swallowed thickly as you watched the room ahead of you for any signs of movement.

Nothing.

"I know you're probably afraid, and maybe even injured, but I'm not here to hurt you. I know what happened, and I know why too. It wasn't your fault. Please let me help you."

At that, you heard the sound of something gentle padding against the thin wood floors, reminding you of exactly how old the dampened floor boards in here were, unsturdy and sagging beneath your feet.

You remained silent and rooted to the spot, watching as a little girl, presumably Gwyneth, stepped closer to the light that was streaming in through the window.

Her blonde hair caught the sun gently, and you almost flinched at the harsh stench of blood that hit you as she grew closer. She was covered in it, from head to toe, and that became more and more evident as her hair caught the nearly dying light once more. It was an almost coppery orange due to how long the blood had been setting into it, and it was knotted in a way that made you feel bad for her.

"Hi."

You all but breathed out, smiling down at the little girl who stood in front of you, her gaze aimed downward and her expression somber. It was hard to tell what she was feeling, let alone what she was thinking within such a dark space, but even still you tried to remain calm, reminding yourself that she never would have done the things she had if not for the abuse she'd endured.

"My name is Y/n. I'm a detective with the Detroit Police Department. I'm here to he-"

"The Detroit Police Department?"

The little girl asked suddenly, her gaze briefly meeting yours, eyes shining with excitement,

"Have you ever met Connor?"

You were taken aback for a moment, confused about what she meant before you smiled, nodding softly,

"I have. He's a friend actually. I'm sure he would love to meet you if you were willing to come down to the department with me to answer a few questions."

At that, Gwyneth actually smiled up at you, her eyes shining as she nodded enthusiastically,

"Sure!"

You almost flinched at her loud outburst, but smiled back nonetheless, calling down to your coworkers to share the news.

Only their response was less than stellar.

In fact, it turned out to be deadly.

"Fuck yeah, Rookie, show that little bitch whose boss!"

You all but flinched at Gavin's words as he shouted them up at you, and you quickly realized he must have believed you had neutralized the child rather than just talked her into coming of her own free will.

And that was where the trouble started.

Multiple of your coworkers cried out in agreement, and you saw the excitement turn to fear as the little girl stepped backwards into the darkness once more. Desperate to help, you followed, trying to explain yourself as you went, to no avail.

The cries of victory from below, alongside the shouts about the victims receiving justice, was all too much for the young android to handle, and, in an effort to get herself out of her situation, Gwyneth began to aggressively slam her head against the floor, and you gasped in horror as it began to splinter beneath her, falling away in various areas due to decay and a lack of upkeep. If she kept this up, the entire house would be going down with her.

"Fuck!"

You cursed, trying to get close enough to reach her, praying that you could stop her onslaught of self inflicted violence, only to realize the floor was growing weaker and weaker by the moment, the whole house feeling as if it were shaking as the load bearing walls below you groaned out of effort and strain.

You were already too late.

Fear gripped your heart as you realized your situation, your legs shaking as you rushed back to the window, knowing all too well that you wouldn't have enough time to climb down before the whole house collapsed beneath you.

Cursing over and over, you had to fight to stay on your feet as fear overcame you, tears beginning to fall and slide down your cheeks as the realization hit you that you were going to die here, in an unfamiliar house, having failed at your job. You had been unable to save Gwyneth, and now you would be unable to save yourself as well.

But then, over the sounds of the varying cries of fear and shock below, you heard him, and an almost overwhelming sense of comfort briefly trumped your fear.

"Nines."

You breathed out, listening closely as the man below called up to you,

"Detective, you need to jump, now!"

His tone was aggressive, almost angry, and decidedly fearful as he desperately tried to get through to you.

"I will catch you. Remember what I said earlier. I will not let you come to harm, not now, not ever."

His confident tone, the certainty in his voice, and the familiarity of his presence unfroze your fear driven mind, and, deciding to take your last chance at life, you shouted back a strained,

"Okay!"

Down to your partner, knowing full well that it would be all he needed to get prepared to catch you.

You closed your eyes for a moment, trying to ignore the sounds of the world all but falling apart around you as you placed your feet on the window sill, gripping the upper portion of it for dear life as you stepped up and out of the house.

You looked down at everyone for a brief moment, your only safety being the wood grasped within your hands and lying beneath your feet. And this wood wasn't going to last much longer.

Swallowing thickly, you closed your eyes one final time, thinking back to your previous conversation with Nines, back before everything had gone to shit.

"I trust you."

You whispered out softly, allowing your body to slowly fall forward until there was nothing left to hold you up, the air rushing past you as you fell nearly three stories towards the ground below.

AO3 Link

Series Masterlist

[antisocialwritingx]

I’m Right Here Sir Pt. 3

Pairing: Grumpy! CEO!Ari Levinson x barista!reader 

Summary: When Ari is having a rough morning all he wants is a coffee. It just so happens that you were working the register this morning at his favorite coffee shop.

Warning(s): Ari is 6’8”, Grumpy!Ari, cursing, smaller reader, fluff, angst, smut??, slight age gap (Reader is 21 and Ari is 35)

A/N: I am so sorry for such a late update. I have been so busy with college and I’m just ready for this all to be over. I took my last exam this week and this mind block has finally left so hopefully this week I will be updating more. Also, Andy might be getting his own little series after this one once you’ve read this chapter ;)

Word Count: 2.5K

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯 18+ 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵! 𝘐𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘺𝘱𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘦. 𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘭𝘦𝘥𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯 18+ 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘢 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘮𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘯 18+ 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬. 𝘋𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘭 / 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦 / 𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘴. 𝘐 𝘥𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘴 𝘰𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘦𝘭𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘳 / 𝘢𝘰3 / 𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘦𝘣𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘴.

𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘣𝘺: @firefly-graphics​ 

You had seen Ari two days ago and today was the day you were supposed to go on a date with him. Excitement and anxiety shot through your body when you realized you were going on a date with Ari.

It was during your lunch break when you got a call from Ari. Well, it was a FaceTime call since Ari said, “Why would I call you when I can FaceTime you and see your gorgeous face?” His words not yours.

Putting in your earbuds you accept the call and his handsome face lit up your screen. 

A bright smile appeared on your face just from seeing his beautiful smile.

“Hi Ari!” You called out, your cheeks starting to hurt from how wide your smile was.

His beautiful smile lit up your screen as his baritone voice hit your ears.

“Hello lovey. How’s your day been?” He asked, running a large hand through his long hair.

You rested your head in your hand before responding,

“It’s been good, I miss you though and I’m really nervous for tonight.”

Ari’s beautiful laughter rang through the earbuds, bringing a shy smile and blush to your face.

“I miss you too bunny, and don’t be nervous about tonight okay? We could literally be dumpster diving and I’d still be that happiest guy alive because you’re there.”

Of course Ari knew how to make you blush hard as your cheeks felt warmer.

You hid behind your hand as he gave you a small pout.

“Hey don’t hide your face from me! I wanna see your beautiful face.” 

Your giggles ran through the break room as your cheeks felt even warmer.

“You really have a way of making me blush huh? Let me guess, that’s how you get all your girls?”

On the screen Ari rubbed the back of his neck, a smirk evident on his lovely face.

“I mean the only girl I’m trying to get is you, so I’m hoping my sweet talk is working.”

You and Ari talked some more before he had to leave for a meeting and you had to leave due to your lunch break being over.

As you get back to the front of the café you’re met with a very familiar face. 

Forcing a smile on your face you greeted her with your everyday greeting. 

“Hi, what can I get for you?”

Deena looked up from her phone before smirking at you, her perfectly waxed eyebrows raising slightly.

“Well, well, well, who do we have here? I knew you didn’t fit with Ari but this just confirmed my suspicions.” Her high voice made you want to punch yourself over and over.

You sighed to yourself before responding.

“Deena, it's so nice to see you again. What can I get you?”

If looks could kill, you’d be dead with that icy glare she sent your way. 

“Listen you worthless bitch, you are serving me right now so I demand some respect.” 

A fake smile made it to your face as your blood began to boil. You were not a worthless bitch and you certainly didn’t need to give her any damn respect, however you were on the clock so you just sucked it up and took the high road, something she couldn’t do.

“How can I help you today ma’am?”

A snarky smirk made its way to her face before her hot pink lips parted and her obnoxious voice filled your ears.

“I want a large vanilla latte with oat milk instead of regular milk, as hot as possible with a chicken salad and two slices of your banana nut bread. You can charge Mr. Levinson’s personal card since he goes here so often. Why? I have no idea because this place is garbage.” Deena said, her nose turned up as if she was the greatest thing in the world.

You typed in her order but clocked your head to the side at her request to charge his card. You knew that the drink and salad weren’t for him because he drinks black coffee and he prefers the sandwiches here over the salad.

“I’m sorry but unless Mr. Levinson is here. I can't charge his personal card.” 

You could see the anger burning through her veins as she huffed. Seeing her face start to become red made you smile on the inside.

“What do you mean you can’t charge his card because he’s not here? I work for him so just charge it.” She spat, her manicured hands gripping on her phone so tightly, her knuckles were starting to turn white.

You sent her a smirk before replying, “As I stated ma’am, I can’t charge his personal card unless he is here. You may say you work for him but I don’t know that for sure. So do you have another card or form of payment you can use? Or I can cancel your order for you if that would be better for you.”

Deena seethed as she ripped open her bag and shuffled through the bag before slamming the card down on the counter. 

“Well? Swipe my damn business card.” She shot out, motioning for you to do so.

“The card reader is in front of you. If you’ll just swipe the card.” 

An embarrassed blush made it onto her face and she viscously swiped the card through and paid. You handed her the receipt and told her the wait time before she stormed off towards a table, her heels clicking on the ground.

You rolled your eyes at her tantrum before going to make her things.

Once everything was done you called out her name and handed it to her, muttering a ‘have a good day’ before going back to the front.

Just as you turned around her scream resonated through the air.

“YOU STUPID LITTLE BITCH GET OVER HERE NOW.”

At that comment you whipped your head around and saw Deena standing there, chest heaving up and down in anger.

“Excuse me?” You asked, walking up towards her behind the counter.

“Where the hell is your manager?” She spat, slamming the items on the counter before crossing her arms.

Before you could even respond you felt a presence behind you.

“Hi my name is Ben can I help you with something?” You were relieved to hear your manager’s voice. 

Ben was the nicest but sassiest man you’ve ever met and you sometimes wondered how his husband dealt with him, you wondered how his husband and his kids dealt with him.

“Are you the manager in this shit hole?” Deena questioned.

Ben looked at you before looking at her with the most sarcastic smile in the world.

“Hi yes I am the manager in this shit hole. We serve ugly ass bitches with kindness. What seems to be the problem?” He sassed.

Deena gasped at what he said.

“Listen, your little worker made my order wrong and I want a full refund and this bitch fired. She has been nothing but rude towards me.” She screeched, stomping her foot on the ground.

“What did she do wrong on your order?” He asked, ignoring her comment about firing you.

“I asked for oat milk in my latte and for it to be extremely hot and she couldn’t do either one of those right.” 

Ben sighed before resting his hand on his hip. 

“Why don’t I remake it for you? Would that solve your issue today?” He asked, already done with this conversation.

Deena and you hadn’t noticed, but Ben could see Ari entering the café. 

Ari looked at the scene going on in front of him but before he could ask why Deena was there and what was happening, Deena escalated the issue even more.

“No, that won’t resolve my issue. But this will.” Before anyone could ask what she was doing, she picked up her drink and threw it at you, burning your skin and covering you in coffee.

You jumped back and screamed, the hot liquid burning your skin as Ben pulled you behind him.

“Deena what the hell did you just do?!” Ari shouted, storming up behind her.

She quickly turned around and gasped, dropping the cup to the ground as Ben helped you to the back, him and two other people on staff that day helping you clean up and into new clothes.

“Mr. Levinson! You won’t believe what happened, she-” 

“She didn’t do anything. I saw what happened. How dare you assault someone like that! You’re lucky if she doesn’t press charges.”

“I-”

“Why the hell were you even here anyways! You were supposed to be calling Mr.Barber about the business dinner that was coming up! Get the hell out of here and go back to the office. I’ll deal with you later.”

Before she could utter out a response, Ari went to find someone working with you to go see you in the back. 

While all that was happening in the front, in the break room Ben and one of the workers named Marissa were helping you find clothes to change into. 

Marissa was a highschool girl who worked on the weekends with you. She luckily always kept an extra pair of clothes in her locker and gave them to you which you were so grateful for. 

Ben was currently on the phone with his husband who was a doctor and asking him how to tell if your burns were serious or not.

Marissa was helping you wipe some of the coffee off your arms with a cold towel when there was a knock on the door.

Looking up you see Ari and your co-worker Davis at the door, the look on Ari’s face could be described as angry, sad, and relieved.

Marissa stepped away as Ari came forward, thanking her quietly as he took the towel from her hands and went to kneel next to you.

You kept wiping away at your neck as Ari helped with the arm that wasn’t working.

He sighed softly before setting his hand softly on your chin, moving your head to look at him.

“Are you okay bunny? I’m so sorry for what she did. I didn’t even realize she had come here and if I knew she was going to do that I would have-”

You stopped his rambling by setting your hands onto his face. He saw your skin bright red and pulled your arms gently away from his face, kissing your burned skin.

“I don’t blame you for anything that happened with her, okay? I just want to go home and shower and sleep.” You tell him honestly, now feeling the sticky coffee on your skin rather than the burning liquid.

Ben came back with a frown before his eyes lit up at the sight of Ari kneeling down in front of you.

“Okay so hubby said that with everything I wonderfully explained to him, you’re going to be okay, nothing crazy. He said to go buy this cream just in case it starts to hurt a bit, but other than that you’re gonna be okay. You’ve got the rest of the day off, I’m gonna cover for you because girl no one but that bitch deserves what happened to you.” He spewed, coming up and sitting next to you on the bench.

Ben turned his head towards Ari before becoming very serious. 

“You mister. I don’t know exactly who you are but I do know you’re supposed to be going on a date with this lovely girl right here. I need you-- no demand you to take her home, order take out, and take care of your amazing girl.” Ben declared, a blush forming on your face at the comment of you being Ari’s girl.

Ari agreed and helped you grab your things before saying goodbye to Ben, you doing the same before heading over to Ari’s car and giving him your address.

When you made it home Ari helped you into your house, setting your things down before motioning you off to go and shower.

You are so thankful but also heartbroken that Ari was there. You didn’t want to ruin the date he had planned for you tonight but you were glad he was there and is now spending the rest of the day with you hopefully.

While you were in the shower Ari called up his best friend and business partner Andy Barber.

“Ari what’s up?” Andy asked, usually not getting a call from Ari during work hours unless he needed something.

“Did Deena ever call you about that business dinner?” Ari asked, running his large hand through his hair.

“No, my assistant had to call Deena and when she did no one picked up.”

Ari sighed at Andy’s response, wanting to slam his head into a wall.

“I need to fire Deena. She came to my girl’s workplace and threw hot coffee on her just because she didn’t like her!” Ari ranted, finally being able to speak his mind to his best friend.

“What the hell? Is your girl gonna press charges? I know that if  Dove got hot coffee thrown on her I would be pressing charges against whoever hurt her.” 

Andy and Ari spoke some more before ending the call. Ari called up some chinese food to be delivered before you had come into the living room, showered and changed.

You walk up to him and Ari’s arms immediately open up for you to snuggle into.

Sighing at the feeling of his warm arms around you, you buried your face into his chest as you felt his soft lips on your forehead.

“I’m sorry I messed up tonight’s date plans.” You mumbled into his chest.

Ari pulled away from you slightly at your comment before lifting your chin to make you look up at him.

“Don’t apologize for something that isn’t your fault. I would rather spend time with you here, than go on some silly date just because I wanted a day out. You being okay and safe is all that matters to me okay?” 

At Ari’s words your eyes fill with tears. Throwing yourself back into Ari’s chest, snuggling into his body.

“I have some sweatpants in my car, let me go and change and then we can cuddle and eat good ass Chinese food.”

You both moved towards the couch and Ari paid for the Chinese food, both of you cuddling and filling your stomachs while watching some random show that you weren’t really paying attention.

After you both finished you put on a movie you both would actually pay attention to.

Cuddling into his warm embrace you could feel your eyelids slowly start to become heavy. 

As the end credits rolled Ari looked down to be met with you asleep on his chest. Ari himself could feel his eyelids slowly become heavy as well. He laid a soft kiss onto your head before whispering soft words towards you.

“You don’t understand how much you mean to me. I know I’ve only known you for a bit, but I can already see myself with you forever.”

[buttercupsandboys]

Sunshine & Rainbows — an Alfie Solomons x original character story — Chapter 10

18+ NSFW - minors don’t interact 🙅🏻‍♀️

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CHAPTER 10: bad fucking men

Word count: 3642

TW: language typical of Peaky Blinders, implied/referenced sexual assault, implied/referenced child abuse

Alfie and Livy have been keeping secrets from each other, and it’s time to come clean.  

A/N: this is another dark chapter, so mind the tags! Send me a message if you need an edited version. (*things get fluffier soon, I promise!)

If he wasn't sure before, he is now—and it can only mean one thing. 

He's utterly and totally fucked. 

Alfie exhales, dragging a hand down his face as he collapses against the pillows. His eyes are heavy, but every time he closes them, the day's events flash like he's watching a film, and all hope of sleep goes out the window. 

It's strange because violence—even death—rarely keeps him up at night. At least, not anymore. Ghosts haunt his dreams, but they're familiar friends, and the only evidence of their visit is sweat-soaked sheets in the morning. 

But this is something new. 

When he pictures Livy, curled in the corner like a wounded animal, painted head to toe in fresh blood, it causes him physical fucking pain—like ripping his heart out of his chest and leaving it for the crows to tear apart. 

He's never felt anything like it, and that's saying something. After all, it only takes one look at the myriad of scars littering his chest, like points on a treasure map, to know that Alfie's no stranger to suffering. There have been bullets and blades and burns, but nothing from his past has prepared him for what he's going through right now. 

Witnessing her pain and her terror cracks him open in new and horrible ways, and deep down, he knows it can only mean one thing. 

He's fucking fallen in love with the girl. 

Head over heels in love, and it's un-fucking-deniable. Despite his limited experience with the emotion—due mainly to his unwillingness to let anyone into his fucking life—Alfie is discerning enough to know that he's in deep. Livy has found her way into his heart the same way the morning sun seeks out the shadows, and he can't help but love her for it. 

This is a problem. 

It's a big fucking problem because Alfie is a bad fucking man who does bad things to good people, and it's only a matter of time until she finds out. 

Or worse, gets caught in the middle.

Actually, scratch that. Livy's already in the crossfire; she just doesn't know it yet. 

Alfie shakes his head, flexing his hands and cracking his knuckles as he looks her over. Livy is sleeping soundly beside him, tangled in the crisp sheets, wearing a soft cotton nightgown that makes her look far too fucking young. 

Her breath is calm and steady, and he almost smiles as he adjusts a thin strap, dragging the delicate fabric up the gentle slope of her shoulder. After so many nights spent thinking of her, here, in his bed, he almost can't believe that it's finally real. 

But it must be, or else this "dream" is a fucking nightmare.

Reality hits hard, and he curses at the sight of her beautiful face, swollen and bruised like a ripe plum. The doctor said it's just a concussion, nothing broken, but advised Alfie to stay close for further observation. 

Not that he'd let her out of his sight anyway. Right now, he needs to be where he can see her, even if the guilt nearly tears him apart. 

She could have died tonight, and he knows it's all his fault. He had a choice, and he let this fucking happen. Now the least he can do is be honest about it. 

Soon, he promises as he brushes a stray hair from her forehead. Once she's recovered, he'll sit her down and explain everything. 

It will hurt, and she'll hate him afterwards, but in the end, it's best for everyone. It's the only way he can guarantee that what happened today will never happen again. 

But until then ….

Alfie's never been one to hide from the truth, but just this once, he gives in and pulls her close. As his fingers trail down her side, coming to rest on the curve of her hip, he shuts his eyes and tries to imagine that he's a good man, wrapped in the arms of a good woman who loves him. 

— • — • —

Three days later

"The men have been looking day and night, sir. But so far, there's no sign of—"

Ollie is suddenly interrupted by the sound of the door opening. No one from the bakery would enter without knocking, and Alfie instinctively reaches for his gun. The cool steel is heavy in his palm as he removes the safety, but then a familiar voice rings out, and he flicks it back on. 

"Hello, darlings! Did you miss me?"

"Livy, what the fuck are you doing here?" demands Alfie, as he puts the gun down and slams his drawer shut. "I told Edna that you need to stay in your fucking bed."

"Well, it's nice to see you too, Alfie," scoffs Livy as she turns away, removing her gloves and hanging her coat on the rack by the door. "I'm perfectly fine now, thank you for asking, and leave Edna out of this. Your poor housekeeper has enough on her plate already.

"What about you, Ollie?" she asks, crossing the room and pressing a small kiss to his cheek, ignoring Alfie's emphatic grunt of disapproval. "Is he giving you trouble, or has he finally snapped out of that mood he's been in lately?"

"I'm good, but—"

"Oi, fuck off," barks Alfie, abruptly dismissing his second-in-command before he puts a foot in his fucking mouth. "As for you, treacle," he continues, shaking a thick finger in her direction, "If I'm in a mood, it's because you're wandering around town with a fucking concussion. Did Ishmael drive you here? I'm going to beat that fucker—"

"It's been three days, darling. I'm fine," she argues, sounding bored as she twists around to give Ollie a wave goodbye.

Humph. Alfie furrows his brows and glares at the back of her head. Why is she paying Ollie so much fucking attention? What is she doing out of bed? And most importantly, why the fuck hasn't HE been kissed yet? 

Livy turns back and is halfway around the desk when her eyes suddenly widen. "Alfie Solomons!" she cries out, with a hand to her mouth as she struggles to contain her laughter. "Are you fucking pouting?"

"What?" he huffs, gently smacking away her hand when she reaches for his arm. "No, I'm not fucking pouting. I'm just worried about you, aren't I? But apparently, a man can't do that without getting laughed at."

He grunts and continues to fidget under her touch, but Livy's grip is surprisingly strong. "There, there, my love," she coos as she rubs his broad shoulders, holding him firmly in place. 

Alfie frowns disapprovingly at her mocking tone, but after a few minutes, he gives in and relaxes under her nimble fingers. Livy notices and presses a soft kiss against his neck, sending tingles down his spine. 

"Listen, darling," she whispers as she moves her lips closer to his ear. "It's just a bruise now, I promise. Everything's ok."

His mood turns as the weight of her words sinks in. Everything is not fucking ok, he wants to shout but clenches his fists instead. 

Of course, he's happy that she's better—and he knows she's right, it is "just a bruise" now—but admitting it means it's time for the conversation he's been desperately avoiding. He sighs because he knew this day was coming; he just wasn't ready to face it. 

"Livy," he starts as he lifts a hand to stroke the side of her face, "we need to talk, pet. Why don't you take a seat."

She leans back and cocks a brow, questioning the sudden change in his tone. But for once, god is on his side because she bites her tongue and does what he fucking asks. 

His eyes track hers as she circles the desk, sitting down and smoothing her skirts while she waits patiently for him to begin. As always, she looks fucking beautiful, even with half her face covered by a faded bruise. He takes a moment to appreciate every detail—her finely arched brows, her tiny button nose, her full red lips—and thinks back to the day when she first walked through his fucking door. 

It's only been a few weeks, yet somehow she's managed to turn every inch of his miserable life entirely upside down. 

"Are you alright, Alfie?" she asks gently when he doesn't say anything. 

His eyes snap up, and the words come tumbling out before he can stop them. 

"Livy, you need to leave."

"What?" She glances over her shoulder, looking confused. "Do you have a meeting, darling? I can come back later."

Fucking hell. 

Alfie fights the urge to slam his fist in frustration. That was not how he'd planned to start this conversation, but now the cat's out the bag, and he may as well keep going. 

"No, Livy. I need you to go home and pack your things. You can't stay with me any longer."

"I-I don't understand, Alfie," she stutters. "Where is this coming from? A few days ago, you were making promises—"

"I know what I fucking said!" he snaps, losing control of his temper because he's mad at himself and this fucked up situation. "Trust me, I am taking care of you, love. But you need to leave. Get your shit packed, and Ishmael will take you away. Anywhere you want, as long as it's not here."

Livy frowns. "Is this about Sabini? "she asks, looking at him like he's lost his mind. 

"Of course, it's about Sabini!" he explodes, throwing his hands in the air. Why is this so hard for her to understand? "Listen, Livy. It's about him and every other fucker in this town. If you stay here, you'll always be in danger because of me." He leans forward and taps the desk for emphasis. "It's not fucking safe."

"Alfie, you're not making any sense." She reaches out and gently caresses the back of his hand. "Sabini came after me because I killed one of his men. It has nothing to do with you. You saved me."

"I didn't—"

"Alfie, you did—"

"Can you just SHUT UP and listen for five fucking minutes?" Alfie pushes her hands away and shoves his chair back, increasing the distance between them. 

Her eyes narrow, and he instantly regrets his harsh tone. But this isn't easy for him either, and he just needs her to fucking listen while he still has the balls to say what he needs to say. 

"Look, Livy …" he pauses, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and his forefinger before continuing. "Sabini came to me, alright? Before you were taken. He told me—he fucking told me—what would happen if I didn't end things with the Blinders. And do you know what I said?"

"No, Alfie," she whispers. 

"I told him to fuck off. Do you understand what I'm saying, love? I told him to fuck off, and I might as well have drawn a big fucking ‘X' on your forehead." He slams his hands on the desk, and Livy jumps at the sudden noise. "I sold you out, pet. Sold you like fucking cattle because the deal with Thomas is too fucking good to pass up."

"Alfie—"

"I'm a bad man, Livy. There's no way around it. I'm a bad fucking man, and I can't keep you safe unless I send you away."

Alfie drops back in his chair, exhausted by the weight of his confession. His chest tightens as he waits for her reaction, expecting her to explode and knowing she has every right to be angry. 

The least he can do is take it like a fucking man. He owes her that but hopes she doesn't stab him with one of those knives she's so fond of. 

Although if that's what she wants, he's not sure he'll bother putting up a fight. He's done a lot of fucking horrible things in his life, but he's never felt as ashamed as he is right now. 

"Are you finished?"

His eyes snap up, and he watches her walk towards the door. He expects her to leave, but instead, she removes her sweater and gently drapes it over her coat. 

"Alfie, I'm going to assume that today is about honesty, is that right?" 

Livy's voice is calm and steady, and now it's his turn to look confused. 

"I mean, yeah, love. I suppose you could call it that …." 

His voice trails off as her fingers undo the top button of her blouse, revealing the creamy skin of her throat. He's momentarily distracted, but her next words reclaim his full attention. 

"Well, darling. I must confess that I haven't always been honest with you." Livy takes a deep breath and looks him straight in the eye. "There are a few … things that you should know."

His heart starts pounding in his chest as his senses kick into high alert. He wasn't expecting this, and every fibre of his being warns that he won't like what he's about to hear. 

"What the fuck are you on about, Livy?" he demands in a gravelly voice. 

"Well, first, William isn't my father—"

"What the FUCK?" 

Alfie's chair goes flying as he storms across the room, stopping inches from her face. Before he can register what he's doing, a large hand wraps around her slender neck. Somewhere in his mind, a voice is telling him to calm down, but he can't hear it over the betrayal thundering in his veins. 

"Who the fuck are you then?" he demands sharply. 

Livy doesn't even blink. 

"Calm down, Alfie," she soothes, her voice remaining calm and steady. "I'm exactly who I say I am. Perhaps, that was a bad choice of words. What I meant to say is that William isn't my biological father. He and Tillie, my mum, they adopted me."

He abruptly releases her and takes a step back. 

"Fuck. I-I'm sorry," he mumbles, feeling like a right cunt and even more confused. "But I don't understand, Livy. Why are you telling me this now? I'm sorry, love, but it doesn't change things."

She smiles and undoes another button. 

"Patience, Alfie. I'm going to explain everything, I promise. But I need you to sit down and shut up. It's my turn to talk now." 

Livy gives him a gentle shove, and he's too flustered to do anything but what he's told. He takes a seat on the edge of his desk and waits. 

"So, as I was saying, I'm adopted." Pop. There goes another button. "I don't know where I was born, I don't know anything about my birth parents, I don't even know how old I am."

She chuckles under her breath, and for the first time, it makes her look harsh and bitter.

"But there are things I know, Alfie. Things I know that even you could never imagine." Livy pauses and taps a nail against her plump red lip. "What was it you told me earlier? Oh, yes, I remember…."

She stops to release another button, and Alfie can't keep quiet any longer. 

"Fucking hell, Livy," he interrupts. "You look beautiful, don't get me wrong, but this isn't the fucking time—"

"Keep it in your pants, Alfie. I'm not trying to seduce you." She rolls her eyes, and he almost smiles. But then she looks him up and down like he's a whore from the docks. "Of course, you can't help yourself, can you? Because you're a bad man."

Livy takes a step forward, looking oddly menacing, and he can't help it. He actually flinches, and she laughs. 

"What, Alfie? That's what you told me, isn't it? You want me to leave because you're a bad man. Well, let me tell you something, darling. I know a lot about bad fucking men."

She turns around and drops her blouse, and Alfie's hand flies to his mouth because he's genuinely afraid he might be sick. 

At first, he can't understand how she kept this a secret, but then he remembers that when they're together, she's never been naked—and now he knows why. 

Every fucking inch of her back, from the shoulder blades down, is covered in violent scars. Alfie has many of his own, but he looks like a fucking schoolboy next to her. 

His eyes are drawn to a series of round marks, like an infestation of roaches against her pale skin. He's well-versed in the art of torture and knows exactly what they are: cigarette burns. Rage pulses through his veins because this was no fucking accident. Someone did this to her. 

Alfie takes another step forward, and it's even worse from close up. Her skin is a tapestry of raised marks—some thin and delicate, others thick and angry—woven together like strands of wool. His hands shake as he realises this wasn't caused by a single traumatic event. 

No, whoever did this must have spent years abusing her.  

Without thinking, he reaches out to trace a particularly raw looking ridge at the base of her spine, but she spins away, withdrawing from his touch like she's just been burnt. 

"Fuck, fuck. I'm sorry, Livy." Alfie trips over his words as he lifts his hands, keeping them up where she can see them. "I don't know what I was fucking thinking, love. I'm sorry."

Livy avoids eye contact and takes a deep breath as she buttons her blouse with shaking hands. Alfie is trembling with rage and has a million fucking questions, but he knows to wait patiently until she's ready. 

Finally, after the longest silence of his life, she raises her head and places her palms on his chest. Her voice is small but steady as she continues with her story. 

"When I was young, I was sold. No one knows exactly how I ended up there, but I wasn't alone. There were a few of us girls, and men … well, they would come and pay a lot to do whatever they wanted. There was only one rule," she explains, vaguely indicating at her face and chest. "Don't damage the merchandise.

"We lived at the back of a whorehouse. One day William visited—this was before he met my mum. He didn't know there were children there, but once he found out, he came back. He came back and rescued all of us."

Alfie can't believe what he's fucking hearing. He might be infamous for his temper, but he has never been so fucking angry in his entire life. Nothing he's seen or heard could possibly hold a candle to this. 

His fury is building, and his body is shaking, but he needs to let her finish. So he places his hands on top of hers and tries to focus on the warmth of her skin. 

"I'm telling you this because life is not black and white, Alfie. My father was a fucking thief, love. He ran petty cons; I helped him, and we'd run with the gypsies when things got out of control. Our lives were always in danger, but when I needed him—when I needed him—he was always there for me.

"If you want me to leave, I won't argue with you. I know that I'm… I'm not the woman that you thought I was." Livy bites her lip and looks away for a moment as she musters the courage to continue. "If you don't want me, I understand. 

"But if you're sending me away because you think you're a terrible person or somehow think that I'm safer without you … well, you're wrong, darling. 

"I know you refused a deal with the wop, but I don't care because you came for me. You came for me, Alfie, and I don't think you understand how many people in this world would simply look the other way."

Livy collapses against his chest, and all he can do is wrap his arms around her. He knows she's not referring to Sabini anymore and wonders how many years she spent trapped in that hellhole. His heart shatters as he imagines a young girl waiting night after night after night for someone, anyone, to come to her rescue. 

But no one ever fucking came. 

It's almost hard to believe what he's hearing, but the gears in his head have to started to turn, and all the pieces fall into place. This explains everything—the fear of the dark, her time with the gypsies, even William's cryptic stories—it all makes sense now. 

All except for one thing ….

For the life of him, he cannot begin to understand how someone who's been through so fucking much can move through the world with so much light. Livy is the most beautiful person, inside and out, that he has ever met. 

And he'd be a complete idiot to let her go. 

Alfie sits on the sofa and brings her down with him, settling her gently on his lap. His fingers lift her chin, and he chokes up when he sees her silent tears. She's perfected the art of crying without making a fucking sound, and it's just another knife in his gut. He swallows thickly. 

"You're right, Livy," he murmurs, keeping his voice low and soft. "You're absolutely right, and I'm fucking sorry. You're not going anywhere unless you want to leave, alright? You'll forgive me … please?"

Her golden eyes meet his, and Alfie holds his breath until she breaks out the familiar smile that he already loves so much. 

"Of course, Alfie. I don't want to be anywhere else."

"Thank fucking god," he growls as he goes in for a kiss. Her lips part, and their tongues meet, and he makes her a silent promise. 

He's not sure how or when, but heads will roll, rivers will bleed, and all of England will know to fear the Mad Baker when he finally gets his hands on whoever did this to her.

A/N: Ok, I know everyone loves angst, so I was really tempted to let Livy leave and get them back together in a few chapters. But here’s the thing – I just don’t think Livy would tolerate that bullshit. If Alfie pissed her off? Yes, absolutely. But the whole “send her away for her own good” thing? Bitch, please. She cut off a man’s cock in Chapter 9, haha. She's been through a lot, but she's a tough cookie.