#trauma is stored in the body | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

furiousgoldfish · 1 year

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can people get fevers and chills bc of trauma or flashbacks? bc I feel like that's happening to me. im aware that I take hypervigilance to an unhealthy degree bc I live with my family but it is causing me so much body/muscle pain too. do you have any ideas on how to even temporarily relax from that?

Yes, definitely. I'm experiencing a lot of body and muscle pain as well, it's because we're always hypervigilant and tense, to the point where our muscles cannot relax for a second, so they develop a lot of pain due to tension.

I'm more often experiencing chills than fevers, though I can get feverishly hot during nightmares and need a lot of cooling down afterwards. Having such a strong body reaction means that the trauma was immensely dangerous and put your entire body in a state of emergency and panic. You're not wrong to be hypervigilant, your situation is likely requiring it.

In the 'complex ptsd' from Pete Walker, he describes getting better from this by doing stretches and exercising, thus forcing his muscles to relax with action. I don't know if this helps in every case, for me it's very temporary. I hope things get better for you once you move away from this dangerous environment, I'm so sorry you're pushed so far, you have to fight with your own body responses in order to live.

#child abuse #hypervigilance #chronic pain #muscle pain #trauma is stored in the body #trauma reactions

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exerpts-from-the-teenage-mind · 6 months

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Apparently my body is how I keep my feelings at bay. I've chosen not to feel things and now it's piled up perhaps too high to process. Like when I attempt to relax it causes me nausea. But I'm working on it, I promise I'm working on it.

#trauma is stored in the body #feeling feelings #feeling emotional #bodily emotions #what am I even saying

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willowfey · 10 months

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starting to think maybe waking up with an anxiety stomachache every single morning and then needing to spend the entire day trying to get rid of said anxiety just to maybe have a few minutes in the evening of feeling relaxed before going to bed is perhaps not normal

#the first thing i do when i become conscious is check my phone to make sure nothing terrible happened to anyone i love while i slept #i never ever ever have plans and if anyone Else has plans i feel sick with anxiety until they’re back from them #if i have smth planned that week i feel completely tense and on edge until it happens #i didn’t used to be like this i hate hate hate it #i used to feel safe in my little house in the forest where i knew everyone in town and knew my way around with my eyes shut #it’s still the only place in the world i feel safe. that’s so unfair #my separation anxiety is ridiculous. if my mom goes to the store and doesn’t answer a text right away i start panicking #if my sister goes to a class or smth idk what to do with myself until she gets back #if i’m in the shower or have the fan on or headphones in suddenly i’ll think i hear someone shouting and i’ll have to quickly turn it off #ever since i moved here it’s been getting worse. i don’t feel safe here to begin with i feel so out of place it’s unreal #but then covid and trauma with my mother’s health and my uncle dying and multiple relatives getting sick and things happening to my friends #i know i have ptsd from very specific things that happened and i live on a hospital path so every day i hear sirens #and every time i do it fully triggers an anxiety attack in me for at least an hour. and my mom too #since being here my hometown burned and friends i thought would never grow apart did and my brother moved out #i know a lot of that is just Being In Your Low Twenties but also some of my worst trauma has happened in the last handful of years and now #now i’m just always scared. always uneasy. always worried. never fully relaxed. never feel fully safe. & idk how to be myself through that #i’m always paranoid and i never trust people irl anymore. ppl my mom or sister meet. i am so suspicious of them constantly.#if anything small changes at all i can’t handle it. my ability to deal with change has gone so downhill #in the last 5 years of being here i realised i was autistic which led to me unmasking a bit and that. comes with pros & cons doesn’t it #my own health has declined. my body changed a lot in ways i wasn’t prepared for and i had to get rid of most of my comfort clothes #sometimes i just wanna sit on the ground and cry about it and not have to also be the one that picks myself back up. y’know???#but at the very least i’d love to just wake up One Day w/o feeling sick with anxiety already. just one day i want to wake up feeling rested #i want to be myself again but can i start with not being scared? not being tired? i don’t know what to do anymore #i just watch my comfort videos and read my comfort fics and stay in my daydream world

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homeless202 · 1 year

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i know this is supposed to be funny haha considering how he starts singing like a dying cat right after but...FUUCKK

EY is jealous of HJ bc he's good at studying and therefore has a (bright) future ahead, compared to EY whose grades are too bad bc he hasn't been able to follow schoolwork since elementary school cuz of his situation at home (<- he mentioned this in an argument with his dad).

he wants to learn and understand and go to college but he thinks he's too far behind to start now, and he gets even more frustrated when he compares himself to everyone else around him. how he's the only one who doesn't understand what juwan is saying or maths or english. how his own native language is too hard for him sometimes.

#inferiority complex. alienation. self-esteem issues. trauma.#<- at least he's tall cuz otherwise he'd not be able to store everything in one body #also. HE'S SOBBING. HE'S GENUINELY UPSET ABT THIS. even if he's drunk the feelings are real.#this is the first time we've seen him genuinely cry like that btw #the last panel tho: 'how can i keep on living if i don't understand what juwan is saying'#<- drama queen. he really needs to get back into theater #also dare i say typical leo behavior? that's my headcanon for his zodiac sign #no home #no home manhwa #집이 없어 #webtoon #eunyung baek #haejoon goh #ey hj parallels #meta

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rosereleasestheart · 1 year

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I have a type

#revolutionary girl utena #shoujo kakumei utena #anthy himemiya #tgcf #xie lian #heaven official's blessing #mxtx #finished art #something something trauma is stored in the body

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thyme-in-a-bubble · 7 months

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going to a new library in a little bit. my sibling is coming along both as a guide so that i don’t freak out and think i’m doing stuff wrong or unable to find something that’s right in front of my nose, as well as for protection from the christmas decorations and books that thrown in everyone’s faces these days.

#wish me luck #currently in a rough part of the year (nov+dec) so this will be the first time in a very long time that i’ve left the apartment to #go to a store or something that wasn’t super controlled like visiting someone #we love having ptsd 😑 oh boy is it just so much fun for your body to just be like nope just because of what time of year it is #and the trauma that’s attached to it #lea speaks

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hel7l7 · 2 years

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I leave her office & suddenly everything seems to be a bit more in perspective. How everyone is hurting. How everyone just is hurt and therefore hurts another. And how stupidly simple does everything become when you look at the world with a little more love in your heart. How good can it feel when all that hurt you is now yours. What if you hold the pain in your hands and keep it there. What if you own it, face it. It should not have been handed to you but it is yours now. What if you break the cycle of hurting & being hurt.

#i have a #body oriented therapist #is that what's it called?#idk she's more like #about what you feel in your body and how trauma stores itself in the body and stuff #she's not the complicated therapist that makes me want to hit walls and hurt myself #she's softer and kinder #( the other therapist is also kind but he triggers something very complicated in myselfand i just can't seem to break through it)#this piece is about just not turning all the pain into anger #which is something i struggle with a lot

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mejomonster · 1 year

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I said I was writing a novel to someone

and they were like "oh that's good! Writings a good way to process what you've been through" and hoo boy right then did it slam home that to a medical professional it would seem I got health problem related trauma out the wazoo

#rant #ToT i was like. she thinks... i write... to cope with nearly dying in the hospital and starving months and being cut up a lot and in #a bunch of stupid sucky internal pain???#i mean. i wouldnt say i Dont have medical trauma....#when i read The Body Keeps the Score i realized i probably had some even from birth #the whole premie baby unit thing. then a heart problem taking all my calories to keep me alivr making me a tiny child with chest pain #age 5 birthday appendicitis and mu mom told me i didnt even cry i just said to her i was sad i couldnt play #age 8 heart surgery Fixing the lifelong to that point bullshit so i gained 100 lbs almost innediately once body could STORE ENERGY and #wasnt nearly dying nonstop. age 17 mental health decided to try and kill me for several years which id say was worse but not medical?#then fixed mental uealth and GALBLADDER tried to hurt me nonstop agh #then this gastroparesis etc gi bullshit #anyway. um yes i suppose there may be somr medical trauma compoundint the ptsd for other reasons lmao #but. i write cause... i like silly queer morally grey faeries...#and explorint the idea of who is a #person how much can someone change before they cease to be them. and there can be love and safety #and community and better days even if we go thru suffering or feel everyrhing is The Worst #shdjdj but yeah at physical therapy she was like ah yes youre in mega pain daily #writing is a GREAT OUTLET #dhdhdjfj???!!!!#dude no i want to do boxing now thats an outlet. i need to hit stuff #dancing is my actual outlet btw. unless im too injured to dance :c then mentally im WANTING to dance

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bo0zey · 1 year

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manic mixed depressive episode on my bday is so fun especially when ur going on 2 days no sleep n have a 12hr shift starting at the asscrack of dawn in 6hrs

#idk if i want to sleep like i do but i don’t i just keep walking in circles n staring off blankly #also bursted into tears for no reason bc i missed my mom and remembered how much i hate my fucking birthday #was in the middle of a borderline argument w my family then just zoned out n glanced at the time and tears welled #6:13???#then i pretended to go to the bathroom to hide my tears from my dad cuz he would’ve yelled at me if i went to my room w/o saying anything #so there i am crying like a pathetic loser on the toilet trying to suppress n swallow down ugly sobs #and there i am crying in my dumpster fire of a room on the floor #i literally go the entire year without crying abt her but every time december hits i always get into this weird funk #and idk why it’s still happening it’s been 7 years #i think my subconscious mind is influencing my body to release the trauma stored inside it bc i was never allowed to grieve her properly #so now in blips of time leading up to my birthday and the next day of her passing i’m 15 turning 16 again #i wish i didn’t have to work tomorrow so i could go visit her at her grave instead like i never go to the cemetery but i really want to #i guess i can go on her actual death day but i don’t want to go with my dad and brothers i just want to be alone #they don’t understand the feeling of losing your mom and best friend on your 16th bday #they don’t understand what it’s like carrying all this guilt and trauma and holding her hand and feeling her hand go limp at my words #i told her it was okay she could let go i would take care of my brothers and protect them from my father and i would be strong for everyone #meanwhile i’m listening to my dad n my aunt throwing all her clothes in trash bags upstairs #i didn’t even get to pick out what clothes i wanted to keep of hers im so angry my dad refused to let any of us miss her #“i miss mom-‘ ‘she’s dead get over it!’#i got over it alright but then this time of year rolls around and i’m under it all again #i miss her so much i wonder if she’d be proud of me i wonder what it would be like to feel her hand in mine again #ooos im crying again lol #im so pathetic i’m literally 23 in less than 30 minutes why am i behaving like a crybaby child #23:33 when i was typing that btw n 333 is my angel/life path number lol #i wanna saw my arm off but i won’t #i debated staring an iv on myself instead but i’m too drained i just want lay down n cry lol #pathetic loser crybaby girl can’t function can’t shut up making everyone uncomfortable with her sadnes n tears stupid stupid stupid #drown in them and die nobody here loves you anymore nobody cares you’re the problem always the problem #i can’t remember if my mom loved me or not everyone says she did but i forgot what it feels like #i wish i never told her it was okay to let go i lied to her i said i’d be okay but here i am manic depressive

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remyfire · 1 year

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I swear that Scratching The Itch was supposed to just be fun smut once

#do you ever make yourself emo with your own writing because all the characters are just trauma bundles or #don't worry the fun smut is still coming but we have to talk body work and healing and trauma storing first—#my writing #my ramblings

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picavecalyx · 2 years

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brain thinking about the accident and post weapon use whether it be fail or success...and silva directly after those events...

#ooc ;; pterodolphin has no devil fruit #:sparklestars: so much trauma :sparklestars:#like she was not okay for either of them!!!#the accident significantly fucked her over and was the first time she felt paranoia and major anxiety spikes #after the weapon's used; she's just. straight up not okay at all--#completely incapacitated because oop there goes all the energy she had stored in her body #her body was not prepared for that shit #she was NOT emotionally prepared for that #esp with the connection to yveltal who was ALSO suffering thanks to that

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helenwhiteart-blog · 1 year

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A lifetime fuelled by pain and frustration: handling the emotional fallout of long-term undiagnosed autism

Diagnosing as autistic is a very mixed bag and can go off in various directions for different people; some positively transformed by it, others so destroyed by the late knowledge they fall into even darker places. Or, most likely, your response may swing back and forth for a while, perhaps for years, until the pendulum loses momentum (if it ever does) and you hopefully land in a better…