#tristan writes stuff

[so-i-did-this-thing]

Hello Nicholas!

If you don't mind me asking, why did you choose the name Nicolas? Idk I just like learning why people who've picked their own names made the choice they did

(I have the incredibly silly reason of "it was given to me in a Minecraft server because it was shorter than my username and the movie Life of Pi had just come out." So now I'm Pi, and I have been for like 12 years. I didn't even like the movie that much, and the friend group all went their separate ways after high school. Fun fact, the guy who ran the Minecraft server was in my class, and he went by Link. His "real" name is Nathan. Even the teachers called him Link, and that's what was on his assignments. It was too the point where we had a substitute who did attendance, and Link almost got marked absent because he didn't realize that the sub had called his name because it said Nathan on the paper. Which is valid and honestly I'd love to reach the point where my deadname is so detached from me that I don't even realize somebody is talking about me. Also, he was Link because he loves Legend of Zelda)

Oh ho, it's Nick Lore time!

I don't internalize my own name. My inner monologue doesn't work like that. Never has. Dunno if that was from dysphoria or the autism. So, what to call myself has always been strange.

When I was a little kid, I masculinized my birth name of "Jamie Nicole" to "James Nicholas" because it was convenient. My nickname was actually "James", and this made me gender euphoric, even though the name didn't fit me.

My first real "secret boy name" was Garet, after the Weapons Master character in the Shannara book series. I just thought he was cool. I was a teenager and still into edgelord fantasy characters. It's kind of funny how in fantasy, this is a stock "rogue" name.

In college, I started toying seriously with what to call myself. It's no secret on this blog that I love the All Creatures Great & Small book series. I saw a lot of both myself at the time and who I wanted to be in the character of Siegfried Farnon, and wanted to take his name. But I also felt it might be a Bit Too Much, and tried his brother's name - Tristan - on for size. I liked it a lot. I was ready to commit.

Family and friends... did not take my coming out very well. Not with violence, but with either lukewarm reception or a desire for it all to just Go Away. Even the "supporters" at the time felt the need to tell me they didn't like my choice of name. It was devastating. I couldn't bear the thought of the name, Tristan, anymore - what should have been joy became shorthand for my rejection. I think that's a big part of why I pushed this particular piece of comfort media away for many years, despite it being so formative and literally sanity-saving to me as a kid.

So, I stuck with my gender neutral birth name (and sucked up having a feminine middle name) for ages. Until I was in my 40s. Then it become too much to bear. Hearing my birth name felt like the death of a thousand cuts.

I will admit I compromised again a bit in the end. I went back to a masculinized birth name, I just switched the order to "Nicholas James". I wanted to assert myself to my mother (who wanted me to be "James") and I did genuinely like "Nicholas". I like having a name structure where there is a formal ("Nicholas"), informal ("Nick"), and diminutive version ("Nicky") in the name. There's also a fictional Nick that I love (Nick Valentine from Fallout 4.) I won't lie, I still think it'd be fun and affirming to go back to Tristan or commit to Siegfried, but I don't want to go through the entire social and legal process again, especially because with the former I know I will get shade for being the sort of autistic that is a sponge wrt fictional character traits, and with the latter, I worry it will put me on government Lists. I do like being called Nicholas/Nick -- it is affirming and it does finally feel like my own name. And hey, "James" is the name of another character I loved in my precious book series, so I have that box checked as well.

I still don't call myself anything in my internal monologue, though. Brains are weird.

But the tldr; here, which I think you have also alluded to, is that how we name ourselves doesn't have to be seen as cringe and it's very easy to just roll with someone's choice. And god knows parents name their kids after fictional characters and random concepts all the time. Naming yourself is both affirming and vulnerable, not just along the cis/trans axis. So, don't be a dick when someone tells you they want to be called [name].

[redgoldblue]

so assuming Avery is actually pregnant / doesn't early-trimester miscarry (which is not a given), there's two reasonable ways this can go, right. number one is she gets an abortion, the plotline is used to pull them all back together again, and they all have some collective hurt/comfort about it. number two, the one i would write - don't get me wrong, i'm all for women getting career-driven abortions, but hear me out - is the one where she does have the baby. under the cut bc it got long.

she goes to med school at first while pregnant - Max is right, it can be done, people in my cohort did it - and either gets lucky with the timing of the actual birth being during holidays, or just works her way to getting time off for a few weeks around it. And then... there's a baby. And you know what else there is? There's two dads (because we're 100% Mamma Mia-ing this bitch. they never find out who the bio dad is and they never seriously try. Baby comes out with Avery's exact skin tone so that's no clue.), and an entire cruise ship worth of backup babysitters. So Avery goes back to med school, and leaves the baby with Tristan and Max.

And, yes, raising a baby while also running an infirmary with a rotating cast of temporary substitute nurses filling Avery's role isn't the easiest thing they've ever done, but Robert loves fulfilling grandparent duties any time he's not on duty; Rosie gets one of those strap-on baby carriers and walks her (i don't know why i've decided the baby is a her but i have now) around the engine room pointing out parts and explaining concepts and hey, the baby never complains about her Michigan stories; Corey gets a cart and a bundle of clean sheets and pushes her down the corridors until the smell of laundry powder automatically makes her start laughing.

Max and Tristan make a pact to send Avery at least two photos a day - which ends up getting supplemented by everyone else who's with Baby - and FaceTime her most days, and whenever she gets a few days off she meets them in port. (The most expensive part of baby-raising ends up being her flights to wherever the Odyssey happens to be at the time, at least until Robert finds out and figures out a way to start paying her 'maternity leave', despite her insistence that the whole point of this is that she isn't maternity-leaving and he should probably be paying himself that and anyway, isn't she technically not an employee right now?)

And the thing is, during this time, Max and Tristan start... realising some things. Like how neither of them feel like they've lost their only partner, because they.. haven't. Like how the co-parenting's been working out better than either of them expected, because they fell instantly (minus a few minor bumps) into a shared rhythm. Like how sometimes they look at the other one holding Baby and feel like their heart's about to explode.

Also, they've both started sleeping in Max's bed. Because Baby's spent so much time sleeping in the corner of the infirmary that now if she wakes up at night and can't see both of them, she starts crying inconsolably. And obviously Max's suite is more suited to multiple inhabitants, and they're usually too damn exhausted to even remember the first time they were in this bed together.

(usually. most of the time. and when they're not, they don't make it the other's problem)

So at the end of the first year of this, the last two days of the year's last cruise have been packed with crisis after crisis after demanding patient after crisis, and as soon as they finally wave the last passenger off they hand Baby gratefully over to Robert and go crash out in Max's bed.

Avery was supposed to be meeting them on board tomorrow, but her last exam gets unexpectedly moved up by a day (believe me, med school loves to pull that kind of shit on you), so a couple hours after the passengers have gone, she shows up to surprise them. And finds Robert (a known ody3 shipper) first, who lets her take Baby with minimal captainly sulking about it, and while she rocks and kisses Baby, tells her (as a known ody3 shipper) that the two dads will be on the Pelican deck, but they're probably asleep.

Avery kinda frowns at him, but doesn't question it, and takes Baby up with her to Max's suite to find them. And they are both fast asleep, on either side of Max's bed with a space carefully preserved between them (because it's usually where Baby would be and they're both terrified of accidentally rolling onto her in the middle of the night). She's also exhausted after exams, so she crawls into it, lies on her back with Baby on top of her chest, and goes straight to sleep.

Tristan and Max wake up before her, and when they look across at each other, at Avery and Baby between them, they both simultaneously realise, oh. oh. oh, this - this three, two-and-half, four people, all together - this is it. this is the love, this is the children, this might even be the home - the second, third, fourth bucket list items to happen in this bed.

[good--merits-accumulated]

it's wip wednesday!

I am............. still extremely busy. I'm NGL. So much so that I have only been able to write ~700 words in the last week (and that isn't going to change! I'm on a hospital visit all day tomorrow and I have a nasty anatomy-filled Friday), but the ball - is - still - rolling. Here's an excerpt post-the Todd and Pitts podcast interview.

[mapplesand]

my ocs digital footprint is probably hell on earth so let's dive into that for fun lol

they're all pretty active on various social media (instagram, tik tok, twitter, tumblr, reddit ect)

Marco

most of the time it's instagram because everyone in their grade follow each others and Marco is an avid stalkers (mostly to girls)

his first account was banned and he keeps getting suspended or restricted on the one he's using since middle school, he mainly post memes or pictures where you barely see him (like guns he stole to his father and you just see his camo pants and combat boots so you know it's him), the memes are just well, edgy boy humor filled with the dumb horny posting about anime girls

don't go through who he follows, it's a mix of girls from his middle school, girls he knows are in his grade and popular model/onlyfan models (and there's also memes account and shit like that)

his twitter is a lot like that but he's just rambling about dumb shit and tweets about whatever he thinks is pissing him off at the moment, then there's the heavy rt of anime girls, his likes are even worse he's probably happy that no one can see them anymore and he probably likes even more fucked up shit there

Tristan is the only one who replies to what he posts and they often bicker about the dumb shit the other put in their timeline

then there's reddit, because of course Marco is a redditor, that's where he get his memes from, he's not really active per say but sometimes he complains about stuff

here's a list of the subreddit he follows and yes I did browse through reddit for 2 hours mindlessly to find all of them because i have too much free time

then he has tumblr because Tristan uses it and he wanted to test it for himself (he thinks tumblr is the gay equivalent of twitter) he probably just post on tcc even if Tristan tells him not to do that or he'll get banned but he thinks it's funny so he does it anyway

and finally again because of Tristan, he uses AO3 and read fucked up shit on there, probably stuff tagged with "dead dove, no not eat" you probably don't wanna know what he's up to

Tristan

he's less active and more of a lurker, on instagram at least, he's only there to follow artists and probably only post pictures of nature or dumb things like rocks or graffitis on walls idk

only rt drawings on twitter and replies to Marco to complain about the porn he sees on his tl because of him, thing is twitter is also his hideout for following more furry artist and well nsfw artists so Marco is gonna make fun of him for that lol

definitely more active on tumblr tho, he just reblogs a lot of stuff but still gains a pretty average following, he reblogs fanarts and stuff he thinks is funny or relatable, he sometimes lurks on the "evil side" of tumblr as he calls it because of morbid curiosity but stops when it feels too depressing

and then he's a big fanfic reader so of course AO3 is on his top 3 website that he uses a lot, he's embarrassed to admit that he read a lot of smut in there and will never let see anyone his bookmarks

he's just pretty normal with his relationship to social media honestly

Josh

he's just a normal guy who uses instagram and tik tok, he probably has snapchat, whatsapp and you know, stuff that normal people uses

he doesn't have any quirks he post on his stories about parties he's in and that's basically it

Tyler

doesn't post much apart from his drawings on instagram, he follows everyone because David just shows up in his dms and is like "hi tyler if you need to find anyone i follow everyone so i can give you anyone's contact if you need it for group projects !" (David is self proclaimed class representative) so Tyler just wanders on people's profile and well, it's a pretty bad look but he doesnt stalk people on purpose

he probably doesn't do anything on social media, you probably wouldn't know it's him if you dont know him

I do think he has reddit but again it's only about informational stuff (psychology and bombs mainly) or art

when he starts talking to Tristan i'm sure he's gonna both make a tumblr account AND an AO3 account, he knows about it because of Carmen but they probably both push him towards the fandom side of the internet even if he doesnt understand anything

[queenjunothegreat]

In my kid AU, it is VERY Important to me that you all know that the McLean household is stuffed to the fucking gills with kids. Every last member of the Aphrodite cabin (except Silena, who is away at college) lives there. Tristan and Aphrodite were married for a few years there (she brought Drew and Silena with her) and she just kept turning up with new babies that weren't from him, bit on GOD those are His Babies Now. Aphrodite wound up dipping pretty soon after Lacy was born, but Tristan had already filed for custody on each and every one of them. Piper, Lacy, Mitchell, and Valentina all just think of him as their dad. Silena was probably close to 12 when she met Tristan, so he was never Dad™️ but she does love and respect him if for no other reason than he's her siblings' dad. Drew is a bit of a mixed bag. She was only 4 when she met Tristan, but it was a VERY tumultuous time followed almost immediately by the introduction of Piper, which just made things an even bigger mess. Plus, her big sister who she adored never called him dad, so she didn't either. She does subconsciously refer to him as her dad though and sometimes it slips out which she thinks is SUPER embarrassing.

[whumpty-dumpty-doo]

"Deedoo, that Easter pic is almost a full month late...??"

YEAH, WELL...

There it is anyway. sdfbsdjhgd I didn't spend a month off and on drawing it in my free time just to wait another year to post it

[shitpost-it-tristan]

Soo, I spent all day yesterday putting my entire heart and soul into a Hero's cuties fic that ended up being like.. 10 chapters long. Typed it all out on my phone notes and honestly I think it might be the best thing I've ever wrote-

Like it's so coherent and not to toot my own horn but I think the titles I came up with were pretty clever considering I took tylonel 3s before writing (wisdom teeth were removed and my mouth hurt)

I actually really wanna post the fic but one of the chapters is 17 pages long and I'm not sure if tumblr will let me. I'll figure out a way to post it up at some point!

[artilaz]

if Tristan were a companion what would his romance route be like?

Okay I can't really say anything about what kinda quests or w/e you'd have to do to romance him, but I can definitely tell you about what he's like and how he'd act and react to your decisions. So here goes:

Tristan is a genuinely good guy without a hint of a mean streak in him. He's kind, compassionate, and willing to give almost everyone a chance, and displaying similar traits is the easiest way to gain approval with him. Helping others without the expectation of a reward, supporting those around you, and showing mercy to those who wronged you are high up on his list, whereas any kind of cruelty will earn you a stern talking to from him, and if you overdo it, it'll cause him to leave your party.

He also wears his heart on his sleeve, so if he likes you, he'll let you know. He'll never flirt with you if he doesn't mean it at least a little seriously, and he doesn't like it when people do it to others. A little mutual play flirt is one thing, but getting someone's hopes up just to crush them by telling them you weren't actually serious is something he's not going to react kindly to.

He's got a huge romantic streak, so his romance has the potential to be absolutely sickly sweet. Ever since he was a kid, he's (semi-)secretly dreamed of being swept off his feet by his very own fairytale prince. His previous lover, of whom he'd thought he was The One, however, left him in a very sudden and cruel way, and now his broken heart is giving him a hard time truly letting someone into it again. He's an optomistic person at the same time though, so he wants to believe there might still be a chance for love for him out there.

Tristan is a ride or die kind of guy, so if you actually manage to win his heart, he'll be fully invested in you. One of his love languages is engaging in things you enjoy, to the point where he'll literally learn new skills for you, even if he's never been into them before the relationship, because he thrives off of your happiness.

If you're in a relationship with him, he'll actually let you get away with an array of less than kind behaviour, since his trauma has made his sense of self-worth suffer severely, making him believe he wasn't good enough to stick with. There are, however, a few things that'll make him break up with you immediately, including but not limited to cheating, or him finding out you were only using him, even if you did develop genuine feelings later on.

[arthurtristankingsmen]

Small things I think I'd like for myself, a non-exhaustive list:

- Be engaging and fun to watch the streams of, enough to build up a small group of people who want to watch my streams regularly. so whenever I do one, I have people to converse consistently with in the chat and connect to

-improve my art enough that I can do more interesting and dynamic poses and produce cool pieces faster. It'd also be rad if i got to a point that people might tip me for the chance for some of my work, even the silly doodles, not just because they're my buddies (though I will never not appreciate the kindness of friendship too <3).

- Write again, whatever I want. Write the characters I want to. Create for myself, or to share with others, both art and writing, but without the expectation that anyone *should* like it. It's okay if it's just me. I'll love it enough for everyone. Notes don't matter to me already, but i need the same mindset about comments and engagement, where they're icing on the cake, but the cake should be mine to enjoy the process of baking.

- fight to become kinder and more patient again. I feel like I've lost myself because of traumatic events and some abuse over the last few years, and I'm not as good at being someone worth being around as I used to be. I burned out and I've struggled to be as understanding or to say things right, and I've fallen on too-teasing humor. I need to change, to joke in kinder ways than playful jabs that could accidentally go too far, and to find that gentler version of myself again, while maintaining boundaries. I can be honest and say what people need to hear, but I won't be blunt, I'll take the extra minutes to say it with compassion and sympathy and understanding. I want to be a safe space.

- Learn you can't help everyone. I know I want to, so so bad. But there are times you can't, and accepting that is better than feeling helpless and getting upset. I can't do stuff like donate to everyone who needs it every time, when I don't have anything to spare. I can't give up all of my mental spoons to help someone vent about a stressful day, when I'm barely hanging on by a thread. I can't keep telling myself that my life has no point and It's too late for me to be okay, so the only thing i can do is be of service to others and help them live better lives than me. It isn't too late for me, and my sacrifice wasn't asked for and it doesn't make me a hero or 'good' that i'm willing to do that. I have to kill the egotistic part of my brain that thinks my suffering for that kindness is "noble", and not something that would make the people I'm helping that way feel guilty for taking from me, if they knew. Give what you can spare of yourself, but leave enough to live with. No one wants others to set themselves on fire to keep them warm, and if they do, that isn't a relationship to maintain.

- Stop putting emotional energy into people who won't listen to the advice you give. instead of saying the same thing over and over again and getting resentful that they don't listen, just let them be. sometimes people need to stumble and stand up on their own to really learn for themselves, and it isn't worth all the energy you might try to give, just because you feel it'll help them, especially if they don't truly want to listen.

-You can't fix everything. it's exhausting, and a little too much ego to think you know better for everyone, and it's controlling to try and take over to help someone like a parent they never asked for, even if your intentions are only ever meant to be good and helpful. People are in charge of their own life, and they'll figure their stuff out with time, whether it's learning to listen because of realizing it would've helped a different time, or through trial and error. Keep the advice to people who ask for it, or it actually seems to help, and conserve the energy you'd spend on the people who nod along but never follow-through, so you don't end up feeling frustrated when they don't heed it.

-related, but stop putting as much energy into relationships that feel one-sided. Find people to talk to, to have fun with, and stop investing so much in relationships where almost all of the emotional energy is yours. You can't be the one who always tries to carry a conversation just to see it drop off. If they don't have the energy for you, or you're not a priority, that's okay. We can be friends, and still have nice talks and you can still care about them deeply! But try to prioritize relationships that make you feel you are worth listening to and engaging with, for yourself, rather than the ones where others zone out when you start talking when its not something they care about or are fixated on, or those who only engage when they need a sounding board, or drop off every time you try to engage them. All of these things are fine to do on occasion, don't get me wrong (i do it myself, it's human and not something to punish yourself for) but if it's almost every time, it's okay to feel undervalued. And it's okay to want more, and to focus on the relationships where we prioritize each other more consistently, and listen and engage with each others' interests more equally, both the ones we share, and the ones we just want to talk about with someone. Try not to guilt others for these things because it is natural, but if you need more, you need more, and it's okay to focus your energy where it makes you happier to be, rather than feeling bad the space you're in isn't meeting those needs.

-at the same time, be aware you are not beholden to all of your friends' energy and time. Sometimes, they will not have the energy or spoons to hang out out or talk, but that does not mean they don't love you or spending time with you. Try to be patient and understanding. Sometimes, they will do things without you, with other friends and that is okay, too. They are their own people, and they are allowed to exist outside of being around you, even with other friends. It's alright to feel bad sometimes about missing out, especially if it seems to be about maliciously leaving you out, or about avoiding you, or what you missed out on feels big and important. but it is okay for people to engage one another without inviting every other person they know every time, including yourself. Sometimes, a big group is too much for one person, sometimes they just want one-on-one time--- a friend group is not a singular unit that you are breaking by hanging out with friends separately. While everyone getting to hang out is great, you're allowed to have friendships that don't overlap, and you're allowed to hang out with friends who *do* individually, and everyone else you know is allowed to do the same. It's fair to want to feel a part of things, but it is not a terrible thing for others to enjoy time with just one friend, and it doesn't mean they don't like you or enjoy your company too. it's okay to be disappointed, but try to remember that, and try to find ways to accept it, like making time yourself for special hangout time too, or acccepting that whatever they were engaged with will still be fun for them now, and being okay with being late to the party, so long as you get to join in.

-try to become more positive. Not in a toxic positivity way, but it's okay to curate a space where everything wrong isn't the focus all the time. Being online is an escape, and while it's healthy to vent sometimes and work through problems or tough stuff, it's also easy to fall into consistent negativity, and people exposed too long to that will burn out. It's good to be able to tell people how you feel and communicate, but you need to learn to sometimes sort through things on your own, and try to also be a source of good and energizing feelings to balance out the tough stuff, and strike that balance. talk to people where you can just have fun, and be a source of support and joy for others where being around you ends up with them feeling good more often than sad or hurt or bad. you're not responsible for everyone's feelings, but you can always try to be someone you'd want to be around more, too. Find the things that bring you enthusiasm and be loud and supportive of people you care about-- it doesn't have to be every time, but try to be the person you want others to be for you, who make you feel engaged and listened to and like they care. Take the time to find the words that will mean something to someone, and make the effort to say them, you never know how much it will mean.

-BUT check your ego. Just because you take the time to say something kind because it might mean something to someone else, or to be supportive and listen, and to be that person that you wanted someone else to be for you--- *doesn't* mean that the people you interact with have to be that for you. You are not entitled to them changing for you, or engaging you how you want, or supporting what you make just because you made it. Sometimes tastes or things are different, and that's okay. You are not owed that, just because you do it for someone else. You chose to do what you do, to become more positive because that's the kind of person *you* want to be. it shouldn't be because then they might give you what you want. Friendship is not transactional. If that change does happen, that's great, and you might become closer for it. but you cannot expect that, or make them into what they want, because they are real people. so changing with the expectation that if you try harder, so will they, is unfair to put on them, and will end in disappointment if it doesn't happen.

-if what you really want is something different than what you are given, it can be talked about, if you want to see if it's possible for the relationship to change for your needs. but it's their right to say no to changing anything they do. And it's your right, if that happens, to instead focus on the friendships you have that already suit your needs, or to find new ones, instead of staying in a position you're unhappy with. try to communicate, and/or find the connections that work better for you.

-Communicate better. It's always good to keep trying, and keep getting better at it, even if you think you're already pretty good at. Never assume people know what you're thinking or how you're feeling. If you feel bad and are starting to feel resentful over something, step up to talk it out. just like you aren't in charge of someone else's feelings, they're not in charge of yours. If you feel a certain way, the ball is in your court to engage with someone and figure out how to address the issue, for both of you to resolve it, or understand what's going on. Do your best to figure out and frame things as 'us vs the problem' rather than you vs them, and do your best to be honest, but kind in communicating. Try to be sympathetic and understanding of their side, but don't let their side invalidate your feelings entirely, unless something is cleared up that makes you feel better. Even if you can understand where they're coming from, that doesn't mean what you feel doesn't matter. There are ways to acknowledge what happened without just going with them being right. You aren't doing yourself or them any favors by bending down and just agreeing with them to avoid conflict, that only leaves more hurt feelings and resentments down the road.

-At the same time, though, sometimes it's best to hold your tongue. There are some people who cannot be reasoned with or spoken to, and in those spaces it is best not to waste your energy fighting. Try not to put too much weight to the words of someone who you fundamentally disagree with, it's okay to choose not to engage for your own sanity or safety.

-get a remote job, so I can afford food and rent, so I can not hurt my disabled body just trying to have the money to survive with, and I can give gifts to people I care about and help my friends without worrying about what I have left, and I can afford to pay off student loans still looming over my head.

-write rp again-- I miss it so bad, but I am holding off until I get a job so I don't get sucked in and forget to be responsible. But its a goal to get back to it the minute the other part is handled.

- pay better attention. Try harder to not adhd away when someone is talking. Find methods to be an active listener, or make sure to apologize if I slip up, and show I want to hear what I missed, so the other person can feel listened to.

- take better care of my physical form. I need to eat, and to exercise and get sunlight more. Even if I have to work up to it at my own pace, it is something I have to pursue and choose to commit to, and I want to do better than half-hearted. I don't want to be bed/house-bound, unless it is something I don't have a choice in. Do what I can without causing harm to myself, and understand where my limits are.

-Keep going. Keep going. Keep going, it can get better and it can get worse, but you have to find the reasons why it's worth it to be here to ride out the lows. Keep going. It's okay, people love you, people like you being around, you'll be okay one day. Keep going. I love you.

[wreckedhoney]

^^ "coming to the conclusion that positioning the "can people enjoy things that would be immoral IRL in their fiction" debate as a proship v anti fandom debate is akin to pretending that "should we have the death penalty" is a discussion that only matters in Death Note discourse"

not proshipper not anti but a secret third thing (person who has a career in the media and, through covering legislative politics, has watched "associating with problematic fiction or entertainment is an indicator of moral degeneracy" rapidly become a mainstream GOP position that they are encoding in legislation to target the queer community under the guise of protecting children, thus coming to the conclusion that positioning the "can people enjoy things that would be immoral IRL in their fiction" debate as a proship v anti fandom debate is akin to pretending that "should we have the death penalty" is a discussion that only matters in Death Note discourse — the extent and manner to which fiction affects reality is an issue that is immediately relevant to today's US politics, and to summarize my opinions on the matter in fandom terms would be to diminish the ways this debate is affecting america Right The Fuck Now. and i have stopped taking "this person is bad for shipping the wrong anime thing and being horny about it" in any sort of good faith ever since I saw it literally used as part of a GOP smear campaign against a transgender state legislator in an attempt to defend the right from backlash after they used their supermajority in the Montana house to prevent her from speaking on the floor. Anyway I think everyone on this site, especially Americans, could benefit from ceasing to think in proship v anti vocabulary and instead developing coherent political positions on the nature of fiction that do not directly align with current fascist political tactics)

[asmrrpaddict]

This is an excerpt from my original fantasy novel. The Legend of the Kieryn.

Context:

Set in first person. Lily’s (my original main character) POV

Lily and Tristan are on their honeymoon. They have just ridden a while on horseback in the rain.

The term Kieryn in my novels is what Lily is. She is an all powerful magic user (still in training).

They have never seen each other without clothes on.

A Wraith Elf literally rips the magic from a person leaving a tear like scar on that person’s skin.

Ages:

Lily: 18

Tristan: 20

They have known each other since they were 5 and 7 respectively.

CW: cursing, minor wholesome spice, talks of scars, tears.

“I am drenched.” I laugh.

“Maybe we should get out of these wet clothes. You know before we get sick.” Tristan says, a smirk tugging at his lips. I roll my eyes, “Look I’ll even turn around.” He spins around.

I face away from him and lift my shirt over my head. My white braided hair sweeps over my shoulder. The wet thud of his shirt landing on the ground behind me makes my arms tense.

He actually did it. I think.

“What the hell?” He shouts, making me jump.

“What? I knew you would look!” I reach for my shirt.

“Wait,” I feel his footsteps coming closer and my hands tremble.

His cold hand gently grazes my scar at the spot where my neck meets my back sending chills down my spine.

Damn, I forgot to tell him about that. My face scrunches tight, not in pain, but cursing myself.

“That, right.”

“Who did this to you?” The calm anger in his voice is something I’ve never heard from him before.

“I forgot to mention that. Let me start off by saying it doesn’t hurt anymore. When I was born, they needed to take my magic to protect me from Fauth so they had to use a Wraith Elf to take it from me.” I can’t believe I just used the annoying ‘needed to protect me’ line I’ve been listening to for months.

I look at him, with my back still to him, as a tear falls from his closed eyes. Sharp lines crease his face. He takes a breath and his expression relaxes. Sadness replaces the malice. When he opens his eyes, he catches mine watching him and he wraps his arms around my torso.

“Please listen to me.” He says in my ear, “I promise you, I will never let anyone hurt you again. You may not need my protection as the Kieryn, but I want to protect you, my Lily.” My body shudders as tears now slide down my cheek, “Is that okay?” his voice, a whisper in my ear.

I nod shakily.

“Thank you.” He sighs.

His lips press gently on my scar. Then again, then over and over until he has touched every inch of it. I turn and kiss him, allowing myself to be intoxicated by his lips.

“I love you.” he grins.

“Forever?”

“Forever.”

[good--merits-accumulated]

[stumbling out of the google doc covered in blood] i am NOT cut out for writing romance

[mapplesand]

"Marco was whistling a song he knew and before Tristan could think about it twice, he went to his side :

“Pumped up kicks huh ?” as soon as these words slipped through his mouth, he felt a wave of embarrassment because he was never so up front. What was he doing ? He never talked to anyone and avoided every social interaction, this could not end well, Marco was probably going to tell him to leave him alone and...

“Ah, we have an expert here I see…” even though he looked surprised by Tristan’s sudden entrance, he tried to put on a confident smile on his tired face."

Morbid Minds, chapter 4 - Closer

or how Tristan, known for being the shy anxious guy tried to talk to Marco, famously known as the guy who dresses like a school shooter

[townofcadence]

✏️ I'm also rather curious, but henlo! o/

✏️ for mun to write you a note

I don't think we've directly spoken, but I see you on my dash and I think you write really well! Sam seems like a really cool, well-developed character that you've put a lot of heart into and don't force to be perfect! I also think it's really interesting how you have multiple versions of her for different settings, and how just some details of her life changing effects her and her personality so intrinsically. There are core pieces, but it's so cool to see the narrative differences and how different trajectories change you! I think you've made a very cool OC and I like reading what you post :D

[ogviceversa]

Bet

Will:

The two straight guys you see above are Caleb and Tristan, we are sort of friends. Although we barely have anything in common nor do we really socialize in public.

But one thing we do share in common is our group gaming night on Sundays. We play video games every Sunday for hours. And we even have teams, ‘the straights vs. the gays’. My best friend Jake and I are the gay team while the other two ‘best bros’ are the opposing straights.

We get really competitive and we will even make bets at the beginning of the night. But last night was the craziest bet so far.

The night was pretty much the same as usual, a lot of trash talking but at one point Caleb made a comment that Jake and I both thought was outlandish.

“Yo y’all gay guys have it easy,” he said to us.

I piped up and said, “how so?”

Caleb went on this tangent about how straight guys have it so tough these days and how much easier it is to be gay.

Jake and I laughed at him.

“Dude you couldn’t be gay for one day,” said Jake.

“What’s so hard for you Jake? I could easily be you for a day but you couldn’t handle being me,” says Tristan.

“Oh is that right?” says Jake.

“Yeah you wanna bet on it?” I added.

“Sure,” says Tristan.

I thought for a moment, are these guys down to do what I think?

“All four of us swap bodies. No BS, we all have to do the other ones routines, no one outside of us four can know and we have to be convincing in public that we are all each other. First one to ask to swap back loses.”

“Caleb you down bro?” asks Tristan.

“Yeah bro, this will be easy,” Caleb says with a grin.

“How much are we betting on?”

“Hmmmm…. How about $1,000 a piece.”

Jake’s eyes get wide as he hears me say the amount.

Both Tristan and Caleb grin and say, “deal.”

After hopping off, I immediately started writing down my daily stuff and everything Caleb would have to do. I made sure it was as ‘gay’ as possible. I even gave him going to a gay bar Friday which I’m sure will blow his mind lol.

So as I laid down last night, it started to hit me. I’m actually going to swap bodies with Caleb— and low key Caleb’s hot.

My mind raced thinking about what it will be like having his body. And I started to get hard from the thought.

I looked down at my slim frame and imagined what it’s going to be like with all of those muscles.

I thought about jerking off but Hell I’ll let that be Caleb’s problem in the morning.

The Next Morning:

I woke up notably in a different room, a very straight man’s room. Caleb has dirty laundry backed up into a pile in the corner, his hats stacked up on the wall, and a bunch of obscure pictures which I’m sure his ex decorated for him.

I lifted up the comforter and even Caleb knowing I was going to be in his body this morning he still slept commando.

I looked down at the bulge inside of his boxers and then down at his hairy legs and feet. His sheets have this musk that immediately filled my noise. I’m sure he doesn’t wash them enough.

Caleb’s bulge started to get hard and my first reaction was to touch it.

But instead I grabbed Caleb’s phone and called Tristan’s number. It rings for a few until I hear Tristan’s groggy voice come across.

“Will is that you?” says Tristan’s voice with Jake in control of it.

“Yeah it’s me,” I say back.

“Holy sh*t! I can’t believe that agreed to do this,” says Jake.

“I know! Have you uhhh… explored any?” I asked him.

“Fuck yeah! Tristan has some sexy feet!”

“I bet! So does Caleb,” I say wiggling his toes.

One thing about Jake and I is that we are pretty open with each other. We originally met on a gay hook up app and have only hooked up once. That night we were both so hammered that we ended up sharing all of our kinks together. Turns out both of us are into all of the same things. Feet, jocks, pits, etc. We even send dirty vids we’ve jerked off to back and forth. It’s a strange friendship but at least I know I can trust him.

“Will, you have to send me some pics! I’m hard as a rock right now!”

“Hold up, I got you bro,” I say to him.

“The way you say bro with his voice is so hot,” says Jake.

I laugh at him and pull out one of Caleb’s feet for the pic.

“Heading your way!”

“Oh my god his soles! I wanna suck on his toes so bad,” he says.

“I’d let you bro, you can suck on my toes anytime,” I say to him.

“Oh my god, keep talking like that!”

“Only if you send a pic back,” I say to him.

“One sec man I’m about to nut,” he says breathing heavy.

“Jake you’re jerking it right now?”

“Yeah man, I started before we got on the phone. Oh fuuuuuuckkk, this cock feels so… Will! Will! I’m cumming!! I’m cumming a lot!”

I’m so hard, I can’t help but join in. I pull off Caleb’s boxers and his 10” rock hard cock comes out.

“Wow it’s beautiful,” I say out loud over the phone.

“What is?” says Jake out of breath.

“Caleb’s dick, it’s like perfect.”

“Oh Tristan’s has a curve to it but it’s huge! I literally have a foot long between my legs. He needs to trim his pubes though, I’ll probably fix that here shortly,” says Jake.

I can’t speak, my focus is on the nicest dick I’ve ever seen. I run Caleb’s fingers along his sack all the way up his cock head. I feel chills…

I aggressively grab and start pumping it. I start moaning loudly.

I can hear Jake in the background saying, “dude, switch to FaceTime!!”

I’m too into the moment to put on a show. I lift up Caleb’s foot and sniff it while vigorously jerking off.

I run his tongue up and down his sole and scream out, “I’m Caleb Thomas now bitch!”

I’m so close, i wanted to go on forever. But that’s when Caleb dick literally sprays cum everywhere uncontrollably.

“Shit!”

“What?” says Jake.

“I got his cum in my eye,” I say back.

“Hahaha I’ll be over shortly!,” says Jake.

[germesthegenie]

Seriously what was this guy’s problem

Been wanting to do a drawing with how I imagine Victoria’s fear aura to look like and this arc gave a good opportunity for that. Thoughts on the arc itself below

Ended up with a lot of thoughts this arc so doing this now rather than waiting for Arc 9. Also started writing more of these comments as I read rather than after the chapter/arc.

Arc 8

Looking at the audiobook and thought, Chapters at a reasonable length? Maybe?

Yay Defiant and Dragon!

I liked the little scene of Victoria asking about Armsmaster’s plan during the Leviathan fight in the context of her family’s deaths. Usually thought about if Aegis got killed as collateral damage from the luring plan and how Defiant felt about that now, kinda forgot Manpower was also there

Huh yeah kinda funny how tinker personalities divide like that. Some of these segments of Victoria’s narration do feel a bit rambly or tangential (sometimes kinda feels like WB taking any opportunity to expand the worldbuilding on powers) but at the same time can be fun and highlight how Victoria’s more of a cape nerd to Taylor’s power munchkin

“Wow Kenzie you sure know a lot about lead poisoning!” “Thanks I researched it a lot” … :(

More things building up for Capricorn’s story. Guessing he’s our next focus this arc or the next? Having to timeshare a body with contrasting personalities does sound like it’d suck, even moreso with the sexuality stuff

Damn Monokeros is creepy. Casually having Birdcage tier capes sitting in the same prison as lesser criminals, especially ones with that strong of a Master power, is probably the biggest flaw of the prison system here. Not to mention it being accessible enough to be the target of any capable masterminds in need of minions it seems. I forget, did Khepri or Scion collapse the Birdcage or something to that effect? Or is it just because it’s on Earth Bet that they don’t use it anymore?

Kenzie highlighted the main theme of Breakthrough’s powers: They almost all have incredibly strong and potentially deadly powers, but for one reason or another they hold back, for the most part because they’re heroes. It’s interesting, but also makes me wonder how things will go when they face a threat they can go all out on (like an Endbringer tier or someone with a kill order)

Finally got to see the whole “everyone jumps the rulebreakers” thing Tattletale talked about in the whole cops and robbers talk way back in Worm, at least for smaller time rulebreakers and not S Class threats.

Also still reinforces my thought that Prancer is essentially a more villainous Skitter from an outside perspective. The Undersiders were playing pretty loose with the Unwritten Rules as well by the end of things

Cryptid continues to get weirder and more horrifying what do you mean he has a form that gives birth

(8.7) Wretch, kill Monokeros with hammers please. And Kenzie please don’t internalize what the creepy child killer thinks.

I’ve only had the Major Malfunctions for 1 chapter and if anything happened to them I would kill everyone in this room and then Carol

Ok actually Carol is being kinda cool here… how is she gonna mess this up? Aside from the probably unintentional bit where she assumed Tristan was straight

(8.9) The little secret the group’s keeping from Victoria… I’m guessing its Wretch related or Amy related

“We’re gonna show everyone we can handle PR” ok cool how will you do that Vic- “by telling everyone what happened in Gold Morning” what

(8.11) This is feeling like a high stakes version of 25.4… This won’t end with a 7th Endbringer, right? /j

(8.11) These hosts could never be O, J, and Koffi like they are just all kinds of awful.

That said, it makes sense Victoria is better with PR than Taylor, given New Wave basically depends on PR

Speaking of, Taylor mention! Love the ascension of her rep to “traumatized literally everyone”, and not even using bugs to do it. Wonder how she’d react to that if she somehow learned about it on Aleph.

(8.12) Actually can a 7th Endbringer show up and kill Hamza and John Combs? What the hell is their problem

Between these guys and the Martins, by comparison Carol might actually not be that bad- wait Carol what are you doing

(8.12) Oh ok that’s where Carol messes it all up. Sees Victoria forced to confront her trauma in front of thousands and went “How can I make this about Amy 😈”

Granted, Amy was kinda dragged into the spotlight as well with all that. Fuck Hamza, seriously. Still, not now Carol.

(8.12)…Speaking of. Well damn Amy didn’t realize you had game like that.

(8.x) Please take all of Kenzie’s suffering and give it to Hamza and John Combs

Awkward girl who thinks of herself as weird? Surprising calm confidence in dangerous situations? Incredibly down bad narration around a specific guy? Close enough, Natalie. Welcome back Arc 1-7 Taylor /j

Hookline and Kitchen Sink losing to an untrained civilian and a mostly techless Tinker they are never living this down 😭

(8.y) Every fanfic with Scapegoat in it should have him just randomly keel over with injuries from another Scapegoat’s healing (ik thats not how it works but it’d be funny)

Gotta love power synergies, even if it’s Teacher exploiting them. Also Valefor really does just keep winning (in terms of getting to use his power, probably not gonna be winning as Teacher’s thrall)

Dinah mention?? What’s she up to now?

And a Contessa mention. Not liking that Teacher has plans for her.