#um. intelligent commentary go

[public-relations-representative]

finally getting brave enough to use this blog. hopefully will keep using it i make 0 promises though

anyway. BEHOLD. my winston headcanon designs

more extensive thoughts/headcanons and doodles belowww

i know a lot of people dont agree but as far as im concerned, shes always been a skelecog. she was built specifically for COGS inc pretty much as is

besides the radio head. that happened later, but still before they made moves into toontown. yes hes been a part of the company that long

has actual radio functions built into them. the intent is for him to be able to tap into existing radio broadcasts as a literal live advertisement. insidious!

i dont have many thoughts on this design because this is borderline "canon" winston. besides the eyelashes. which they should give him canonically.

no i havent figured out what the dagger is logically. its just a part of her ok

i guess i could talk about personality headcanons but i wont. yet. i need some content for other posts if i want to keep this blog alive

winston is in the dungeon for a LOOOONG time. im talking over 5 years baby. id make her more visually fucked up but i dont want to make details mcgee more complex to draw

if i was powerful id make more of her visually broken and those joint problems external in some way. thats for someone else to do though

several of her other not visible functions are long broken; plenty of her internal systems have long gone non-functional, including her radar, propellor, and ability to access some of her internal databanks (ie: memory)

her balance, visual and audio processors (sight/hearing) and control of her limbs fail occasionally too. her voicebox is broken (we know this) but it hasnt entirely failed.

system errors are effectively like an abscence seizure. BSOD for robots, basically

if im being realistic the whole glitching through walls shouldnt exist with how seriously im taking him. but it does anyway because i like fun

WHEELCHAIR WINSTON

this idea has lived rent free in my head for years its about time i got round to this

anyway while shes in the dungeon they do just effectively get fired on paper after a while; so when they show their face back up for real, he does just get fired officially for reals

he ends up finding refuge with old friends; william and alton. im not getting into my awesome dynamics with them here but they were close before the dungeon happened

he gets semi-patched up by will, whos learned some level of self maintenance thanks to his horrible leaky suit. will isn't familiar with skelecog maintenance though, so he could only fix some of his simpler problems

besides the external patch-ups, shes managed to get some simpler system fixes from him, enough to at least help with the frequent system errors and the glitching problems. theyre both still present, but not as severe.

everything else is still a problem though. in fact, some of them have gotten worse, particularly with his arms and legs. theyre prone to fail on a moments notice, and she tends not to go far without some sort of mobility device after a while.

IN SUPER DENIAL ABOUT BEING FIRED. he takes up a bunch of hobbies to keep himself busy now they dont have a job and makes herself a scarf in bootleg sellbot colours so they can pretend. they have to go through an arc before getting over that sorry.

can you tell this is the thing ive put the most thought into

okayyyyy thanks everyone who actually read alla that biiiiieeeeee

[ikroah]

I've given everything I have, didn't know I'd run up such a tab, Oh, Lord, ain't the reapin' ever done? —“Ain’t the Reapin��� Ever Done,” Eddie Noack (1972)

It Keeps Right On a-Hurtin’ #25 - Ring-a-Ding-Ding IV

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Read IKROAH on Archive of Our Own

Notes / Original Pencils / Transcript:

Notes:

At long last! As I've mentioned a few times, this issue got...delayed because I spent 2023 getting divorced, falling in love again, going outside, touching grass, laughing, playing, et cetera. But even if you toss all that aside this issue would still have been a doozy because I've been wanting to try an issue in this artstyle, and with a much large page size, for...well, for over a year now, ha. The thumbnails for this issue are nearly a whole year old!

Usually I have a lot of fun commentary about how a script changes over the course of working on an issue, or how the production panned out, but the making of this issue has been stretched over such a long time that I can't even begin to really describe it. Lemme just show you the original pencils so we can get out of here and move onto the next one, which will hopefully take far less than the time it takes to carry a pregnancy to term.

Oh, actually, there is one thing! If you spotted this happy couple on the first page, then check out @memepipboy's comics too.

Also, here's Vulpes in the dead Yamcha pose.

Which is also about how I feel after going on a bender of productivity last week to get the whole issue colored before it slipped away again.

Original Pencils:

Transcript:

EXT. NEW VEGAS STRIP. A small plaza outside the casinos is flushed with lights and people, all coming and going, even at such a late hour. The crowd is monitored by the Strip's POLICE SECURITRONS. Two people are exiting a casino: ROSE OF SHARON CASSIDY, and

MESSENGER: AGNES SANDS!

AGNES: Oh God, I'm--

AGNES: --wait, are you NCR?

The MESSENGER that has called out AGNES' name is a surly and middle-aged man in uniform.

MESSENGER: Correct, ma'am. I'm a messenger.

AGNES: Courier, huh.

CASS: Hell do you want, boot boy? We're busy.

MESSENGER: Your presence is requested at the embassy on the south side of the Strip.

The exchange has caught the eye of a BYSTANDER READING A NEWSPAPER.

AGNES: You said requested, as opposed to, um, required?

MESSENGER: Yes. I'll be blunt with you, Sands: the incident near Gecko and your subsequent desertion have made you a fugitive of military police since 2269. I'm sure you know that--but this is not an arrest.

MESSENGER: This isn't even about your personal case, necessarily. It's only from chance reports at the Mojave Outpost and Boulder City that intelligence was made aware of your presence here at all. The NCR merely wants to let you know that you--as well as your companion--are persons of interest to us in two of our other open investigations: the Legion raid on Nipton, and recent terrorist attacks on merchants in the area such as Crimson Caravan.*

CAPTION: *Various events of IKROAH #7-16. -Lou.

MESSENGER: There's also some other matters, which are classified.

CASS, at AGNES' side, listens intently. Then she glares at AGNES, who is grimacing but avoiding her eye contact.

MESSENGER: Now, our intelligence officers only want to speak to you, not arrest you. So there should be no cause for alarm or any worry on your part. It's your choice to come to us willingly--and on your own time. But--

AGNES sweats nervously.

MESSENGER: My orders are to make this next part very clear. This is merely the current state of our interest in you and your companion. If your presence does become required, as opposed to merely requested, by the NCR--and it very well may--

MESSENGER: --consider this a nice, friendly notice. I'm here because the NCR knows where you are. And the NCR wanted you to know that, because it wants you to keep it in mind as you mull over whether--and when--you might be feeling co-operative. That is all. We'll be in touch, Miss Sands.

The MESSENGER departs. The BYSTANDER READING A NEWSPAPER observed the entire exchange. The moment that the MESSENGER is gone, he speaks:

BYSTANDER: Ahh...I must admit, it does make me glad when people discuss my work.

AGNES: W-what?

CASS: Pardon?

BYSTANDER: And it was fortunate, as it turns out, that you were spared that night in Nipton.

AGNES: Oh...oh no--

CASS: --YOU?

BYSTANDER: Very fortunate indeed--

The BYSTANDER grins.

BYSTANDER: --that you were spared from the burning tires, spared from the teeth of the dogs, spared even from the cross and stake--all of this, there, was the finest work yet of VULPES INCULTA--against the profligates of the west, and for the glory and the might of CAESAR'S LEGION.*

CAPTION:*IKROAH #9. -Lou.

AGNES and CASS are transfixed where they stand, taken aback by the reveal. CASS scowls while AGNES squirms with terror. She remembers:

The raging fires and the horror show of NIPTON. Crucified bodies and dogs to eat the corpses.

VULPES: During our talk in Nipton, I admittedly became quite curious about you, Agnes. You had intrigued me for some reason, and I wanted to know what it was. Only later did I finally place it.

Her hands up in front of her face, a futile barrier between herself and three men. Benny. His gun, pointed at her, shining in the light from the moon and the lantern.

VULPES: A tabloid story from the news on the radio. A courier shot in the head near Goodsprings Cemetery.

The SECURITRON with the cowboy face, VICTOR, carried her out of her grave. Or so she was told.

VULPES: --who miraculously returned from the grave. It was you.

There were three men. Two besides Benny. She found them later, one was dead and the other had two more with him.

VULPES: It was also you, as I would later discover...who slaughtered that pack of Great Khans in Boulder City. Clearly no ordinary courier.

VULPES: Why, even now, you assassinate the leader of the Chairmen in his own casino--in his own bedroom, no less. Very impressive.

AGNES: But how did you--

VULPES: Know? From one saboteur to another, I do have to commend you, Agnes. You're quite covert...for someone who had no reason to realize that she was already being watched, that is. Just as we have been watching Benny, the dearly departed.

VULPES grins wider.

VULPES: My network of frumentarii have detected something of a conspiracy in Vegas...something about a certain piece of platinum, I hear. Which reminds me--the mail has gotten so unreliable lately, don't you think?

AGNES is visibly panicked as VULPES continues.

VULPES: The NCR'S interest in you is not misplaced, Agnes Sands, given your recent exploits.

CASS is suddenly going down the casino steps--

VULPES: But I doubt that they are as quite aware of the bigger picture as--

--and raising her fist, and--

VULPES: the--

--punching VULPES in the face.

SFX: WHAM!

VULPES is flung to the ground, his nose bloodied. One of his teeth have been knocked clean from his mouth. He stares upward, in disbelief, up at the furious woman who's laid him out.

VULPES: Ah...yes. Rose of Sharon Cassidy. I've--

PTOOEY. A wad of spit splats against VULPES' cheek. CASS points a finger at him as he shuffles back onto his feet.

CASS: Get my name out of your mouth right now. I'm not afraid of you. You just piss me off. And unless you get lost I'll deck you so hard that you forget my name. Hopefully how to form complete sentences, too.

CASS: I think we've heard enough, you goddamn dogfucker, and whatever you're selling, we don't fucking want any.

VULPES: Ah...so no less impudent than last time, despite...well.

VULPES wipes the blood from his face with the back of his hand, muttering from behind his palm in LATIN.

VULPES: Sī cognōscere nōn vīs canis senex tum nēquam praeter futuendum eris.

VULPES reaches his bloody hand toward his dislodged hat.

VULPES: Agnes--the Legion has a particular use for you, a use which comes with certain courtesies that are not extended to your companion.

VULPES: ...she would do well to keep this in mind.

VULPES returns his hat to his head. AGNES has rejoined CASS at the base of the steps.

AGNES: "Use?" What use? I don't have anything--I mean, I'm not--whatever you--whatever the Legion wants with me, I don't know anything. About this, or about Benny. If you want the chip, I--

VULPES: Agnes, Agnes--you're a terrible liar. Or else just terribly naive.

VULPES turns to leave.

VULPES: If the NCR is interested in you, and they are, then seizing you for ourselves is certainly useful enough on its own. But truthfully, this isn't about the NCR. The Legion is interested in you--I am interested in you--because Mr. House is interested in you. You and that chip.

AGNES: Mr. House!? But I...no, no, I just thought the chip--

VULPES: Vale, courier. And vale, Rose of Sharon Cassidy. And be safe in your travels, if you can help it--you never know when somebody might be watching.

As VULPES departs, a SECURITRON approaches behind AGNES and CASS, casting a shadow over the both of them.

[tchaikovskaya]

im definitely not gonna be wording this in a way thats sufficiently nuanced or articulate (bc this is a saturday and this is on tumblr idc pay me) but um. although i for sure understand the whole sentiment behind the "why do you feel the need to qualify your support of a celebrity who is being treated terribly by making sure your audience knows you dont like her art?" takes... i do feel like what is motivating those qualifications isnt generally about ensuring that the audience knows u dont like taylor swifts music lol. i wont deny that there are a large number of people who need to be like "TO BE 100% CLEAR I HATE HER AS A MUSICIAN AND I HATE HER POPULARITY AND HER AS A PUBLIC FIGURE, DO NOT MISTAKE ME FOR A SW*FTIE, BUT—" and they are very pathetic.

however i do think most people who are introducing their [meaningful, analytical] thoughts about anything having to do with her as a cultural phenomenon in the last year or two, this latest AI incident included, in this way are doing it to underscore that they arent saying it just because theyre a defensive fan of hers. and thats largely the fault of her fanbase trying to make sociopolitical commentary and Issues out of literally everything having to do with the woman lmao. for more than a whole fucking decade. due to her being one of the most famous people on earth and also a woman. like taylor could write a single that had lyrics like "and when i told him i knew / the grass was blue / he said it wasn't true" and swifties would make #BELIEVEWOMEN trend on twitter for 19 days straight.

theyve been speaking out of turn since the Reputation Era making irrelevant shit part of their crusade for milquetoast liberal diluted feminism, in the name of public opinion of her and nothing of actual principle. of course if someone thinks you're a stan they're going to take what you have to say less seriously than they otherwise would/should? and all of us observing that for YEARS know it too which is why people who are Normal about her but have intelligent socially analytical shit to say about things involving her feel the need to preface it with that kind of disclaimer......?

[variousqueerthings]

hi, do you have any plans of doing a review system similar to the measurement when you get to the chibnall era of doctor who? I think you said that you didn’t watch it, but i could be wrong

SoooOOOOOoooo first of all hi friend!

second of all: back in the day of uh... whenever the first season of jodie came out, I did watch that season and enjoy it, it was a fun first season. I then promptly forgot everything that happens in it, because my brain works that way, and then (because my brain also does this) was like "well legally I can't watch the second season of jodie unless I rewatch the first season of jodie because I can't remember what happened in it, and I can't watch the first season of jodie, because I don't remember what happened in capaldi's seasons, and I can't watch capaldi's seasons because then I'd have to rewatch matt smith's seasons and if I watch those from beginning to end again I will lose all joy in my soul"

third of all: I no longer feel that way, I have grown as a person who deals with my brain being a silly-billy, so not only could I legally watch whatever I wanted to without the brain police nee-nawing, I also um... well I have a system of how to watch matt smith's seasons so that I find them enjoyable, so actually maybe on second thoughts I didn't quite outrun the whatever-the-heck-my-brain-does laws, so much as... rewrite them a little to work for me (crucially I did in fact... watch all of matt smith's seasons and capaldi's seasons to get back here, so hopefully I can implement a more holistic watch in future, where I just engage with the episodes I noted down with commentary and rankings that I enjoyed!)

fourth of all: I'm not sure if this rating system works for chibnall's era (I mean, maybe it does, I genuinely don't know, but my gut says no). the reason I wrote it in exactly the way that I did was mainly because of very specific noticeable recurring things I dislike in m*ffat's writing across several shows -- misogyny, making all of his main guys cruel because they're "intelligent" (which absolves them of the need to be not-cruel), those men being the most important thing in the universe of the story, "sexy" dialogue, amatonormativity, and overly complex plotlines that often spring up out of nowhere and go nowhere

fifth of all: so maybe what I'll do is just note down more simply what I'm getting out of (or potentially not getting out of) jodie's run. I obviously know the reputation of that era, I've seen a couple of oof moments, but there are definitely oof moments in rtd's and m*ffat's runs, so those alone aren't dealbreakers so much as "I see you"s

sixth of all: actually my main question with regards to chibnall's era is whether he understands that diversity is about more than casting. this in particular with regards to yas being a police officer, and how that may or may not create a difficulty in discussing the limitations and cruelties of systems, such as those propped up by... police officers. (this, by the way, speaking of rtd, so many people of colour and of course shirley anne who's a wheelchair user represented in UNIT, but that is a whole other tangent -- shirley I am manifesting a liz shaw type arc for you where you get to go "hold on, this whole thing is sus")

seventh of all: I think it's much harder, probably, to discuss chibnall's era with such a simplistic system, because from the outset it's a much more complex thing than what m*ffat was doing -- that is m*ffat's was still essentially casting a couple of white guys who were travelling with white women until s10 (which noticeably is... just a better season, in my opinion). this not to say I'm not critiquing it, but I wouldn't want to make a ranking system out of "how well does chibnall do diversity," I feel like that would be crass of me, because these stories opening up like this is already such a fascinating space to play in, vs me in m*ffat's era actually being able to track the almost complete absence of diversity in s5 (vampires in venice and hungry earth have my back) just... as a whole... to where we got to in s9 and s10, and using this measurement system to go "yeah this era got noticeably better on several fronts later on" -- I note btw on this point, that bill is waaay more proactive in her first three episodes that amy or clara usually got to be. her questions also aren't just essentially "and now what are you going to do doctor," they're more her trying to figure out how she's navigating her environments and then working with the tools she's getting

eighth of all (conclusion): probably not a review "system" but yeah, I'll still review for sure and maybe find a way to structure that, I want to be consciously interacting with the story, it's the best way for me to engage and actually remember it afterwards. I won't have the benefit of foresight with these seasons either -- that is, I won't know where certain things are going and how I feel about those trajectories (for example, although I don't remember s10 I do remember liking it!) + what I do know, I'll be filtering somewhat (with the flux for example) through the three specials we just got, so I'll know there's some form of through-line of emotional arc that perhaps wasn't felt as much when it was first being aired? all suppositions

ninth of all (epilogue): I am eager I tell you, eeaaager to see sacha dhawan in action!

tenth of all (nothing in particular): I remember s11 starts in sheffield, which is wonderful to me. since the time it aired I've just been in sheffield so many times, it feels so very familiar to me. wonderful to get out of london for a bit

[snowdroprd-moved]

Author’s disclaimer: this game of mahjong is fiction and didn’t happen in the actual work

 2019:

 Commentary for those who play mahjong:

 Inugami: He’s pretty strong in a fair [normal] game, unfortunately the other three won’t let him have it. As an occult style player, he firmly believes in his own nonsensical rules.

Inari: The culprit who turned this game of mahjong into cheating festival. She’s rather strong when she plays normally, but she resorts to cheating because she can't stand the thought of losing to Inugami. Her specialty is iipatsu-tsumo and the like, or win on the first go-round after calling [open] riichi, during which she mumbles something intelligible.

 Nobimaru: The pushy player who entertains others [something like he genuinely just enables the other three]. His play is a brilliant scheme of not winning before Inari does, not discouraging Inugami and not becoming Mihai’s target. He’s fairly strong when he plays normally though.

 Mihai: Follows the rules [of games], and would never cheat if other players don’t, but since they [Inari and Nobimaru] do, he considers it fair he does it too. Of course he’s strong at normal play too, being known as Transylvania’s King of Mahjong.

 Commentary for those who don’t play mahjong:

Inari: Cheats

Mihai: Cheats

Nobimaru: Enables cheating

 2020:

For those who play mahjong:

 Akagi: Likes hands that are beautiful and have high value. Every game, he sprays the disinfectant on the table until the cloth [the game is played on] is drenched. Calculates scores perfectly.

 Kaede: Doesn’t get the rules at all, but the game looks fun so he wants to play together with others. Playing with seven pairs is the limit of his understanding of the game. He handles tiles roughly, and scratched some in the south round. That tile introduced a rule for gampai [tiles that are scratched and can possibly be abused in cheating].

Obviously, he can’t calculate scores. [since he can’t calculate at all]

 Hinata: She hates waiting, so she plays quick hands. Strong against Kaede, when he is the opponent to her left. Leaves bad comments on other’s agari, does sakizumo and kyoda. She doesn’t care about calculating.

Agari – winning call, sakizumo – to touch the tile to draw then change your mind and call, kyoda – to discard a tile strongly/with a strike. All three are bad manners.

Robara: The curry from the mahjong parlor is so good~

Ume: Despite being the one who knows what the world of illegal gambling is like, he’s the most honest person. He pleads the other 3 to follow rules and manners.

For those who don’t play mahjong:

Akagi, Kaede, Hinata: Banned from the mahjong parlor.

translation by messy ( @/uronmirage) everyone say ty messy

this is so epic . i love cheating 🫶

[occasionallygrey]

(the burden of) loss, love, and moving on

almost a part 2 of my previous rant about an itfs fic but this time its about given and its commentary on loss and love and moving on

first draft title: moving on, self-expression, and homosexuality: given in a nutshell OR: i cried so fucking hard at this anime, probably because im hormonal and gay

okay. so im not even going to try to sound remotely intelligent in this one because its basiclaly a brain dump

starting off with the short poem i wrote after crying to ue/yuki's song to mafuyu:

I dreamed about you again last night But this time I didn’t cry; You encouraged me to move on  While you stayed there. 

I’ll scream at the top of my lungs So you can hear me from afar. 

Inspired by Given, Mafuyu and Yuki (lol)

(yes i will cringe to this in a week, yes it is literally recapping the events, do i care, not really)

i think this hits especially hard after yk, graduating high school. mafuyu's turmoil about moving on is so fucking real and unfortunately a little bit too close to home for me. well in this case his struggle to move on is also due to yuki and comign to terms with loss, but its all the same really. fear of moving on. the fact that theres too much weight in each of our choices and we cant ever go back. mafuyu my son (we are the same age) you are so incredibly real.

oh. also the parallels of mafu/ue and mafu/yuki in the beginingn and end are so making me so fuckign ill. "you'll forget this" but he didnt, the memory lives on. and the footprints may have washed away but his memory still remains. in the music, i guess. (these animes about art just fucking end it all for me.) but hes making new memories now. like honeslty as a chronically insane jealous person ue is strong as hell bc i would be kinda sad knwoing that you did the same with your previous boyfriend. but holy FUCKING hell, its about moving on. its so significant because FINALLY, mafuyu is able to come to terms with yuki's loss. yes he kind of moved on but he hadnt really, not until this final movie to the sea. god i cried during the song the interpolation(?) of the other lalalalalala song that yuki always sang tears my heart fucking out. but its the same beach. same weather. same waves but the footprints are gone because he's finally moving on. GOD. GOD!!!! someone kill me.

oh also the sex comment. ik thats significant to some point but i dont really know why he said that. yes it is paralleling yuki but i cannot fathom why its significant. OH but i will tell you this. when yuki first said that in the anime series i cried. so fuckign hard. like that was supposed to be a gag line but i started sobbing. heres my live notes after watchign:

Bro said lets have sex in the bathroom and i laughed and then i started crying for what?? lMFAOOOO anyways Its that gay people find small moments of solace in wherever they can like um that hozier song something greater sin than when im with you Holy FUCKING shit oh only heaven ikll be sent to is when im alone with you Its that even as children they have to hide  Damn im thinking about how uenoyama was like thinking it was wrong and hes like. Hes just a kid. Dude. im gonna kill msyelf

theres also that special thing that hits home which is loss. and dammit i havent really lost anyone like that have i? but i mean as ive said before there is loss with life with people that come and go. loving and losing is what makes it living.

yuki's suicide was NOT selfish, i'll tell you that much. maybe I am selfish, but he was not. he was struggling. did his death impact many other people and leave them with grief? yes. is he responsible for that? yes. but how can you claim suicide is selfish when its selfish of YOU to convince them to stay alive???

anyways thats a tangent. one of the main things i wanted to talk about was uenoyama and his role in helping mafuyu heal. yes i am incredibly glad he is there for him and so loving and caring (and god i wish i could find a girlfriend like that) but. alas. thats not what this is about.

i feel bad, but internally i was screaming at mafuyu during the third movie. like yes, i understand him. a little too much for my liking. i understand not wanting to move forward and being scared of the unchangable future. but i also understand uenoyama. to my understanding, ue was mafuyu's pillar. and to me it sucked that he coudlnt do the same. like a support triangle, except not really cuz they should support each other while also being able to stand on their own. again though, this is me projecting. i acknowledge that.

when mafuyu eventually gets closure though, its beautiful. im so glad ue was able to do that for him. ohmygod and that proposal scene was so cute. sighs deeply. mafuyu is finally able to part with yuki. he understands now that moving on doesnt mean abandoning yuki but rather leaving him behind. somethign he can always come back to i guess, but doesnt need to. not anymore.

old love, new love, i could never understand ts coming from someone with zero relationship experience but i can imagine its hard to move on. i think if i get a gf and fall in love and then break up and watch this i'll cry SO much harder. lol. lol. revisit this in a couple years, future me. was i right?

what was it? "the love was still there." or the love IS still there. mafuyu's love for yuki is still there but its not like. the same anymore. yk? he loves uenoyama now. and theyre so cute. and theres enough love to go around.

i kinda abandoned writing more bc i (1) forgot what i was gonna say and (2) got distracted looking at the hidden inventory movie pictures of stsg as kids and almost cried. we NEED to kill toji.

anyways. happy pride. every thing i see is making me miserable about gay people so its not very happy, but we should celebrate anyways. im gonna watch stranger by the shore next and bawl my eyes out too.

[chairteeth]

Random story revision commentary #2

Welp this time I got through more chapters, and a warning for... Uhhh fantasy violence? But with guns. I'm not sure what trigger that is.

“Jesdale! Come on, we need those missiles over here!”

The fact that this is the line chapter 2 opens with,

Every non-essential worker had been assigned to various wartime tasks,

COVID MOMENT.

overpopulation aside.

Yeah just offhandedly mention the overpopulation problem in the SRP as if it's not the dumbest shit ever (please there is space you are just refusing to use it the population of the Earth is literally less than 4 billion iirc).

Their leader was in fact passed out on a sofa next to Shane, not even breathing. Despite looking every bit like she was deceased,

I'm

“She of course denied my request and claims that if I go find her and her crew anyway, I won’t get a warm welcome. Wonderful. Let’s prepare some light backpacks for the journey.”

Gretchen: receives a very serious death threat Also Gretchen: ignores it

Shane was surprised, tail curling around his leg. “We’re going after all?” “Um, I’m a little scared of the literal death threat?” Rick said, raising his hand a little in protest.

THE RESPONSES FROM THE SANE PEOPLE, FOLKS.

After a few moments of silence, Shane peeked back into the room. “Did something happen?” “… Gretchen said she would abandon us on the side of the road if we end up being a burden to her.”

Yeah pretty much. She's just doing what she needs to do guys dw about it.

“But aren’t I the crown princess? I should be helping with the war, right?”

SHE SAYS IN CHAPTER 3 AFTER IN HER LAST APPEARANCE SHE BEGGED NOT TO BE SENT TO WAR.

“Why do they hate me?” asked Alice. “Please don’t tell me the birds are also connected to Catherine.”

Honey, when animals don't like you, it's because they Know <3

“Don’t be afraid, spirit animals are intelligent creatures.” “Yeah, it’s not that I’m scared, it’s that I have no idea how this thing acts and I despise uncertainty.”

Girlie… Even the lion doesn't like you.

“So warmongering. Because I know Vicky doesn’t have a navy. Wait, does she?” she looked down at her superior for an answer. “Does the SRP have a navy?” “It does. Their ships are made of metal, and those cannons are definitely not honorable. As with their firearms, their cowardice knows no bounds. They even ambushed us from below somehow, but Captain Nora has the ability to cut through the metal they use for their ships, and putting anything underwater while we have her deployed is equivalent to suicide on their part. Foolish mistakes are plenty with that incompetent excuse for an army.”

Absolutely wheezing. Yeah we're fighting modern warships and submarines with wooden ships and it's kinda tough sometimes but we can just send this one soldier and destroy them all lmao. Thanks Mel.

“Catherine, if you get this, please do something about the yokai,” she whispered to the air. She wasn’t sure how Catherine’s apparent omnipresence worked, but seeing as she had mentioned the wind and the earth, it was worth a shot.

She is so desperate it's almost sad.

“Welcome back. Alice, by Lady Catherine’s orders you are to be taken to the Mirror Cave for a private audience,” he informed. “I presume that includes me?” the satori yokai said. The man smiled. “Lady Catherine said she did not have time to wait for either of you, so if one or both of you are not in time, you’ll miss your chance.” “Wait, there’s a time limit!?” said Alice. “I can’t sprint!”

We love Catherine Cramoisi in this household.

he was shorter and so were his legs.

Alice I am begging you.

For the record, it did not work.

I AM GOING TO STRANGLE THE NARRATOR (the narrator is not me or Alice).

Alice suppressed a reflex to glare back at him, continuing to walk through the crystal tunnels. “Essentially, he’s telling me he’s useless and wants to follow me anyway. And he can’t even look pretty while he’s doing it. Wonderful.”

This woman's priorities, once again.

Before she realized, she couldn’t hear the yokai’s footsteps behind her. When she turned to tell him not to match his pace with hers because that was definitely stalker behavior, she found nothing.

I am more amused at the narration than I perhaps should be.

The voice was her own alternate self, meaning she didn’t trust it one bit, but it didn’t seem to want to harm her, bizarre though it was.

This is just so telling. Alice PLEASE.

“And now, to find Catherine.” “No need to look for me.” Alice jumped around, hands up and ready to fight. “WHY do you keep sneaking up on me?” Catherine tilted her head. “I did no such thing. Now then, you wanted to talk to me, yes?”

We love Catherine Cramoisi in this househol-

“Is it about our supervisor?” “Yup.” “You want him gone.” “Absolutely.” “It’s not that I don’t agree with you,” the consort unexpectedly told her. “But politics won’t allow us to do away with him until things are secure, meaning until the end of the war against the SRP, and probably not until after we’ve partitioned Victoria’s land with them.” “Ugh.” “Is that all?” “I guess. I was hoping someone would be able to do something about the creep. Everyone needs their privacy, you know?” “Privacy is a rare privilege for royalty.” Alice groaned. “With each passing day I see more and more downsides to being royalty.” There was a sudden silence. “Alice.” “Yeah?” “You know I can hurt you, right?”

Catherine my beloved… (AND BASICALLY EVERY BETA READER'S BELOVED TOO)

“You know how these things work, I assume.” Alice wound down slightly. “Yes. I’ll owe you a favor. And I better keep my word, or else.”

Haha. Not Rin thinking to herself that if Alice doesn't keep her word this might turn into a fun situation and that's dangerous because "it makes her mask crack" like. Vibrating.

Side note, for chapter 3.5, I've written drowning scenes twice in my lifetime and the second one is far better than this one.

“All according to plan. Fate will bring us back together. Okay, now you’ll be on Fate’s side? Which one is it, rebel against destiny or accept it? May those who accept their fate be granted happiness, and may those who defy their fate be granted glory. Teacher’s words, not mine. I also have no idea if she’s an enemy or an ally. A little bit of both. She wants me to defeat her. And I know I will, eventually. I just hope Lady Catherine manages to keep her attention for long enough. Our queen is a crucial part of the plan, after all. The real game has only just begun. Prepare yourself. That sounds way too fucking ominous. And be prepared to snipe Teacher’s swallows if we see any. Didn’t she say they weren’t hers? The ones with glass eyes aren’t. If you see one with black eyes, no sclera or iris to be seen, shoot to kill. The others are not part of her game.” Everything is part of the game.

Ominous ass. As for why the dialogue is formatted weird, this is how I decided to format two different people in the same body talking to each other (no it's not DID, it's a soul thing). There's another instance but it's two of the same person in the same body so that's also formatted differently.

In chapter 4 we once again get a mention of Gretchen's seeing light, and earlier in chapter 2 she read a letter in braille. Gretchen isn't blind but she can't afford to "see", so she keeps her eyes closed and covered by a blindfold. The seeing light is really just, basically sonar technology?

“If only I had my M82. Firearms and blueprints were literally the only useful things we took from the US, and I had to massacre so many survivors to get us out of that one. With this puny rifle, the shot probably won’t land where I want it to land.”

Gretchen really just insulted the US and lamented her lack of a better gun in one breath (well, thought).

“Zerzurans are like tea bags full of magic.” -Gretchen Rufner, 7043 AU

For context, that means it's the year 7043 "after (the) Unearthing" which is the apocalypse that kinda nearly wiped out humanity.

NOT GRETCHEN LAMENTING THAT SHE MISSED ONE OF HER SHOTS BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T HEAR A BUSTED KNEECAP FROM ONE OF THESE TEENAGERS. Gretchen is questionable at all times and she is especially bad during this part but in her defense the situation is pretty dire and they're kinda at war so.

“H-how could you? You made them believe you would spare them,” Rick managed to squeeze out. “They weren’t even soldiers!” “That’s war. Every child of Zerzura is a soldier. Had I not killed them, I assure you they would’ve screwed us over later or tried to kill us. I was very humane with these two, and if you think I wasn’t, you are both still innocent little children. The world Outside is not sunshine and rainbows, especially not during a war. Now, I wonder…”

She says after holding two civilians at gunpoint, shooting one in the head upon learning he's mute, and shooting his brother dead too after he answers her questions while trying not to sob too loud. After this she also proceeds to kill the goats that were pulling the merchants' cart.

And that is all for today! Man I cannot wait to be done with this so I can work on the fics.

[hearttoshu]

Joshua ✩181021✩ Clap + Thanks

[sixosix]

suna rintarou: forehead kisses [1/2]

gn!reader, fluff, comforting you, wc 359

part two

you’re freaking out.

you’re freaking out and you know it because everyone’s freaking out. ojiro has been offering water, osamu has been offering his onigiri, and even atsumu is offering mindless commentary -- all to distract you from the fact that you’re freaking out.

“let y/n breathe,” kita says, not raising his voice, but enough to have all members backing off in an instant. he looks at you. “you gonna be okay?” you smile and refuse to say anything else, but kita nods anyway.

kita glances at suna, who has been staring at you the entire time, itching to just stomp over and-- and… he doesn’t know yet. ojiro nudges suna after he’s been given approval from the captain.

suna jogs over without hesitation, mouth in a grimace -- you almost laugh since you’ve never been the target of that face before. “let’s go outside?” he offers, reluctantly reaching out to hold your wrist as he leads you away when you agree.

 you breathe in. “sor--”

“don’t,” he cuts off sharply. you don’t flinch, but he sighs, tone gentler. “don’t be sorry. whatever you’re thinking about isn’t dumb if you’re worried about it, and-- don’t give me that look-- even if i find it stupid.”

you almost cry, with tears pooling in your eyes along with his words. he doesn’t know it, but it means the world to you. “thanks,” you sniffle, voice hoarse. “i’ll-- i’ll try to, um, calm down. sorry, again.” he makes a face of annoyance and you want to laugh, knowing he’s displeased.

suna, though, catches you off guard when he pulls you in and presses a kiss on your forehead.

“i-- whu-- why did you--” you squawk intelligently, face burning with the warmth of longing, especially on the spot where he kisses you. you reach for your forehead, and suna fails to hide a smirk.

“don’t be sorry,” he says simply, carefully watching your reaction. his words betray the amusement in his tone. he hums thoughtfully. “are you okay? maybe you do have a fever.”

“you know what you did!”

[goodboyriddler]

I have a request: Klitz x Reader, where the reader is secretly super duper busty, but Klitz had no idea of this (cause reader's clothes are so good at hiding them) until one day, reader takes her shirt off in front of him on a hot summer day, and he sees her huge boobies for the first time 😏 she even lets him touch them, if he wants

Hot summer means a day in the pool. Reader is really excited to show her bff Klitz her new swimsuit! Why does he look like he's panicking?

"Hey Klitz?" You call out worried to where he's been half submerged in the corner of the pool. "You okay?"

Both of you have sneaked to a nearby pool hoping to get some refreshing by the heat wave. Just a splash between friends, who he definitely hadn't had a crush since forever.

And Klitz was panicking.

Very bad.

You're used to wear comfortable clothes, which often happened to be loose shirts and sweatshirts. You took out your shirt, stretching your arms above your head and it revealed the too-small swimsuit underneath.

And they are big. Very big. And they bounce everytime you move. And Klitz should probably have something more intelligent to say from someone who got accepted early to Yale but really, he's trying to survive over here.

Your swimsuit was far too small in your chest, stretching almost painfully so and your tits still were to the point of spilling out. And Klitz tried to swim it off. Be cool and totally not a creep about this because sure, they looked so big and squishy and his hand itched to touch. He's a good friend. But you had splashed water into his face playfully while wrapping your hands into his neck and pressed your chest against him-

You sit in the edge of the pool, your feet lazily kicking the water while your head is thrown back, taking the warmness of the sun. He can see every inch of your body, droplets slowly dripping down. And how your swimsuit presses harder into you caused by the water. Almost can see your hard nipples through the wet fabric. What kind of shit swimsuit you were wearing? And he tries to cover his hard on by crossing his legs.

"I'm fine!" Klitz calls out, getting half of his face out of the water in what it was a failed attempt to get his blush down. "Thanks!"

You smile, before getting up and walking towards him. No, what are you doing, get away from him. He sees you from below, how your tits and hips move, and holy shit. He's going to die so early at this age.

"Okay then, let me help you reapply your sunscreen."

"W-why?"

"Because you get so easily sunburned dum dum, remember last time?" You say while you urge him to the edge of the pool and sit so he faces you. He really was bad, often forgetting some parts and getting red in his pale skin. "And your face has already been red since we started swimming."

Your hands are cold with the sunscreen and yeah, maybe you're right because his skin definitely feels like its burning. Melting. Third degree burn kind. Your pretty hands roam through his freckled skin and Klitz tries to close his legs, cock hard, because you're leaning towards him and bending over. Your hands touch and slide skin while humming. All over, your nails scratching sometimes and he shivers. And he knows if he looks down he'll have a perfect view of your cleavage.

"Oh, you look so different without your glasses." Your hands had started to apply some in his face, and you caress his high cheekbones. It makes his eyes bigger as he looks up at you. "You look very pretty."

"T-thanks." Your hands move his long hair out of the way so you can spread some in his neck.

He feels himself blush. Looking down- and back up quickly when he forgets. He shifts again, nervous as he tries to control his breathing.

"Oh! Do you liked my new swimsuit by the way?" You see him look and stop so you can give him a playful pose. "Wanted an excuse to wear it."

Klitz is surely paying for something, and he doesn't know what he has done to deserve this taunting.

"Um- Uh yeah." It's the best commentary he can give in his current panic. "Yeah, it's very b-very nice."

His eyes go to your chest and he bites his tongue. He wonders how they would look in his palms as he grabs them and kneads them. Full and heavy and maybe he could beg you to touch them. Suck on them or putting his face in them. Suffocating between them. His fingers twitch and he really needs to get out before he embarrasses himself finishing in his swimsuit.

You grab his shoulders. He tenses, before your smile drops into something more of a smirk.

"You like my tits too?" You say bluntly and he starts to stutter. He flusters under your piercing gaze, and your hold in him prevents him from escaping. "That why you've been staring at them all this time?"

"I- I didn't mean-"

"You want to touch them?" Your hand starting to slide up his inner thigh where the outline of his hard cock rests against his thigh. "You just need to ask."

And Klitz let's a small whine, desperately nodding while his mouth waters.

"Y-yes, please."

[veliseraptor]

Hi! Can you give a brief spoilery summary of the Untamed? I just read [the pretties from your posts] died? Oh no. I tried getting information through google but it’s confusing for someone who doesn’t know the characters.

oh lord. there are all kinds of ‘brief summaries of the Untamed’ out there but I’ve always found them vaguely irritating so...I guess that means it’s time for my comeuppance in the form of having to do it myself? I’ll do my best.

I didn’t know how detailed you wanted me to get so I decided to get pretty detailed, since you did ask for spoilery. so this is like. entirely spoilers. spoilers for everything.

also, you can use, if it’s helpful, my brief character overview (‘brief’) which includes some plot information, and could be useful as cross reference also. I’m playing pretty fast and loose with a lot of terminology for the sake of intelligibility, because otherwise this would get even longer and have a lot more links.

also, because you asked me specifically for this, it’s going to have some bias. I tried to keep my interpretive commentary to a relative minimum? but. uh. yeah.

the briefest basic plot overview is (going off The Untamed canon, which you will also see abbreviated as CQL from the pinyin transliteration of the Chinese title (Chen Qing Ling)):

Wei Wuxian, a cultivation (think, loosely, magic) prodigy and creator of his own particular style of cultivation, dies reviled by most of the known world. Sixteen years later he’s raised from the dead by Mo Xuanyu, an outcast and the bastard son of one of the leaders of the main sects of the cultivation world, in order to take revenge on Mo Xuanyu’s enemies (specifically his abusive family and ~an unknown person~).

And here is where we get into the details.

Pretty much immediately upon Wei Wuxian’s resurrection, people start dying at Mo Manor, before Wei Wuxian has even done anything, because of (it turns out) a very angry spirit of a semi-sentient weapon. Wei Wuxian books it out of town after his old best friend/crush Lan Wangji shows up to help the Lan ducklings he’s shepherding (including most notably Lan Sizhui and Lan Jingyi, the only named characters of that bunch), only to wind up running into him again on the road - and not only him, but his orphaned nephew (shorthand, go with it) Jin Ling (Wei Wuxian was responsible for his parents’ deaths) and Jiang Cheng, his martial brother who (at least according to rumor) killed him sixteen years ago and still bears a hell of a grudge. In order to save Jin Ling, Wei Wuxian summons the “Ghost General” Wen Ning, who was supposed to be destroyed and whose presence confirms his identity to a very pissed off Jiang Cheng. Lan Wangji recognizes Wei Wuxian as well. Wei Wuxian passes out.

followed any of that? no? that’s fine, because now we’re heading into a thirty episode flashback that’ll clarify some things. (but not before you forget a whole bunch of things from the first two episodes.)

I’m going to split this into arcs. I’m also going to put this under a read more, because...yeah, this came out to just a little over 10,500 words. I’m...sorry.

have fun?

Cloud Recesses Summer School Arc

The time card says “sixteen years earlier” but it isn’t sixteen years earlier because that would make no sense, but it’s better to give up on timeline now or you’ll just drive yourself nuts.

This is the part of the show where you meet the main characters, some of whom you saw earlier (notably Jiang Cheng, Wei Wuxian’s younger sort-of brother), and some of whom you only know from reference (Jiang Yanli, Wei Wuxian’s older sort-of sister) and some of whom are significantly important (Lan Wangji). You also meet Jin Zixuan, the snotty heir to the Jin Sect, who will be important later. Jiang Yanli is clearly into him and he seems to very much not return the feelings.

At this point, there are five main sects that the characters belong to. They are (with the characters you’ve met from them so far: the Jiang Sect (Jiang Cheng, Wei Wuxian, and Jiang Yanli), the Nie Sect (Nie Huaisang, a flighty and sort of feckless fellow), the Jin Sect (Jin Zixuan, his social skills translator Mianmian), the Lan Sect (Lan Wangji, his brother Lan Xichen) as well as the Wen Sect (more on them in a moment). Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian meet and immediately...something. Wei Wuxian wants to make friends, and Lan Wangji seems to emphatically Not.

You also meet Meng Yao, who is Nie Huaisang’s brother Nie Mingjue’s right hand man, and also the bastard son of Jin Guangshan (the leader of Jin Sect). He is also the son of (using the words of literally everyone) a prostitute, which people remind him of at every possible moment, in case he was in danger of forgetting, or something. He and Lan Xichen have kind of a moment. 

Later on, members of the Wen Sect, led by Wen Chao storm in, posturing disrespectfully, and drop off Wen Qing to “learn” (but secretly she has a mission looking for the Yin Iron/Metal). The Wen are ascendant in power and seem to be flexing their muscle looking for trouble. 

Wen Qing comes as a set with her brother Wen Ning - the pair of them are from sort of...a secondary branch of the main Wen family, and she’s being coerced into supporting Wen Ruohan despite being not thrilled about it. Wei Wuxian bonds with Wen Qing’s younger brother Wen Ning, who has a weird situation that makes him vulnerable to possession (this is important later).

At one point Wei Wuxian proposes - in response to a question! He’s just being innovative! - to put it simply, necromancy, which is, to say the least, not a hit. Remember that for later!

Eventually, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian end up falling by accident into some ice caves, where they learn from one of Lan Wangji’s ancestors (Lan Yi, she’s cool) about the Yin Iron, of which she has a piece. It is an spiritually corrupted metal that can’t be destroyed so it was broken into pieces and hidden in different places. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji resolve jointly to find the other pieces.

Wei Wuxian, Jiang Yanli, and Jiang Cheng (henceforth “the Yunmeng siblings”) are picked up early by Jiang Yanli and Jiang Cheng’s dad (Jiang Fengmian) because Wei Wuxian causes problems both on purpose and not. Wei Wuxian, however, puts together that Lan Wangji is going off on his own chasing the Yin Iron, and ditches the rest of his family to go help.

Yin Iron Hunt Arc

Wei Wuxian meets up with Lan Wangji, who is not thrilled to see him (at least, apparently). They run into Nie Huaisang, who joins them. They come to a town where everyone seems to have vanished and there is nothing fishy going on in the cave with the statue that looks like a dancing lady at all. Meanwhile, Jiang Cheng leaves home to go track down Wei Wuxian and bring him back.

The statue comes to life, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji fight together to defeat it, and then a bunch of...undead villagers (sort of, they get better) attack them, only to be lured away by Wen Qing playing a flute (this ability will never be brought up again). Jiang Cheng reveals himself as having been hanging out watching this go down. Ultimately, by killing the Stygian Pigeon that belongs to Wen Chao, the villagers are freed and they move on.

After a brief stopover in a village, they hear some rumors about a haunted house and take off to go check it out. When they get there, everyone is dead and Xue Yang is on the roof just kind of vibing. Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan manage to get him pinned down and taken captive. This is important and not just because I said so.

Nie Huaisang, who Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng, and Lan Wangji ditched in town, arrives here with Meng Yao, who proposes bringing Xue Yang to Nie Mingjue for justice purposes (which when I write it like that sounds...um. moving right along), which is where everyone heads next, less Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan who have their own things to do. Wei Wuxian realizes that Xiao Xingchen had the same master as his mother, and gets really excited about it; it’s adorable.

They go to Nie Mingjue, who is talked out of executing Xue Yang because they’re trying to find out where he put the Yin Iron (which they figure he has, because reasons. there are reasons, I just don’t feel like going into it.) Lan Wangji leaves in the night without saying goodbye, and then Wen Chao arrives. He is accompanied by Wen Zhuliu, who is called the Core-Melting Hand for reasons that will be important later. There’s a fight, Xue Yang gets loose, and Nie Mingjue finds Meng Yao in a very compromising position (killing a captain of the guard and among a bunch of other dead bodies). He kicks Meng Yao out of the Nie Sect.

Meanwhile, the Wens attack Cloud Recesses. Lan Xichen’s uncle makes him leave to preserve himself and the most important texts. Everyone retreats to a cave that’s hidden and walled off; Su She (who was introduced briefly earlier) caves to threats to his life and tells the Wens how to get into the Lan’s cave sanctuary. Lan Wangji returns with Lan Yi’s Yin Iron and gives it and himself up to Wen Chao’s older brother Wen Xu to spare everyone else.

Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian leave for home (Lotus Pier). We witness family dynamics, which are terrible. The Wens want everyone to send their kids, specifically their heirs, to be reeducated in Wen territory, but they’re not hostages, we swear. No, really.

Reeducation Camp Arc

To reeducation camp with the Wens we go! Where Lan Wangji is not looking so hot, and Wei Wuxian rapidly causes problems on purpose to try to get to talk to him, but mostly just ends up getting himself tossed in a dungeon where he gets attacked by a very bad puppet of a dog. Wen Qing has told Wen Ning not to associate with Wei Wuxian because they’re on thin ice with their boss (Wen Ruohan), but Wen Ning sneaks him some medicine against Wen Qing’s orders anyway.

They go on a hunt, with the non-Wens featuring as bait. Here is where you meet Wen Chao’s main squeeze Wang Lingjiao, who was formerly a servant. Everyone ends up in a cave that contains a creature whose name is unfortunately translated as “Tortoise of Slaughter.” we’ll go with “Xuanwu of Slaughter” instead, it feels better. Wen Chao and his accompanying entourage make a run for it and ditch everyone else in the cave; they manage to sneak out but Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji end up trapped with no way out. They team up and kill the Xuanwu, partially because Wei Wuxian acquires a very cursed sword. Afterward, he is feverish and asks Lan Wangji to sing - enter Wuji! their theme. You see Lan Wangji mouth that it is called “Wangxian” before Wei Wuxian passes out. (Yes, he did name his composition after their ship name. Aww.)

I’ve skated through that very fast but it is important because it’s like...the point where they seriously bond in a major way and it’s all very...like, there was only one bed only they’re trapped in a cave and injured and forced to rely on each other. So not actually really like that.

Wei Wuxian comes around outside of the cave with Jiang Cheng and Jin Zixuan, who brought help to rescue him and Lan Wangji; Lan Wangji, however, is gone.

Oh Shit Things Went Downhill Fast Arc

Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian go back to Lotus Pier, where Wei Wuxian is in big trouble with Jiang Cheng’s mother (Yu Ziyuan, seen later emotionally terrorizing all her children), who already doesn’t like him and accuses him of bringing trouble down on them by defying the Wens. Jiang Cheng’s dad is terrible, Wei Wuxian reaffirms that he and Jiang Cheng will be Together Forever, you, the viewer, know that is absolutely not how that’s going to go.

Word comes that the Wen have attacked one of the smaller sects, and Jiang Cheng’s dad (Jiang Fengmian) goes with Jiang Yanli to talk to Jin Guangshan about how to deal with the Wens.

Then Wang Lingjiao arrives with word that they’re gonna be in big trouble if they don’t punish Wei Wuxian right now. Yu Ziyuan uses her lightning whip to beat the shit out of Wei Wuxian, but Wang Lingjiao wants her to cut off his hand. Then she makes the mistake of saying that they’ll be making Lotus Pier a supervisory office of the Wens, thank you.

Yu Ziyuan reacts...poorly, Wang Lingjiao calls on her backup Wen Zhuliu (and everyone else); seeing the writing on the wall Yu Ziyuan grabs Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng, puts them on a boat, and sends them away, bequeathing her sick-ass lightning whip (Zidian) to Jiang Cheng. They run into Jiang Fengmian and Jiang Yanli; Jiang Fengmian adds Jiang Yanli to the boat full of crying children and goes to sail back to Lotus Pier.

Lotus Pier falls, everybody dies, Jiang Cheng goes semi-catatonic and then disappears, having been captured by the Wens after going back for his parents’ bodies. (Which is more important than it probably sounds, from a Western perspective.) Wei Wuxian follows him and finds Wen Ning, who smuggles Jiang Cheng out and takes him, Wei Wuxian, and Jiang Yanli to Wen Qing for safekeeping.

Jiang Cheng wakes up; his golden core (the...thing that lets him do superpowered things, let’s go with that) was destroyed by Wen Zhuliu. Melted, if you will. And it’s not the kind of thing you can just, you know, fix. He descends into absolute despair as Wei Wuxian looks frantically for a way to fix it - and finds one! Though Wen Qing is not happy about it, she still agrees.

at this point we see the return of an old friend! Song Lan, who has a bloody bandage over his eyes, but has eyes that work, despite the fact that he was blinded by Xue Yang who also killed his entire temple. He explains that Xiao Xingchen said that he was taking Song Lan to his master Baoshan Sanren, the immortal who can cure anything, and doesn’t remember anything else.

Wei Wuxian takes Jiang Cheng to Baoshan Sanren to get his core back. Psych! It’s a lie that he totally made up to explain the fact that he’s actually getting his own core transplanted into Jiang Cheng in a highly experimental procedure. Importantly, Wei Wuxian does not tell Jiang Cheng this.

Post-surgery, rather battered Wei Wuxian gets caught by Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao, who torture him and then throw him into a place called the Burial Mounds, which is more or less what it sounds like, is Very Cursed, and from which no one has emerged alive. Then this happens:

(I want you to appreciate how hard I’ve tried to not put any screencaps in here. but I had to do this one. I just had to.)

and you go oh shit and also well that’s sexy.

Jiang Cheng, delighted to have his core back, descends the mountain only to find that Wei Wuxian is...not there.

Cool! That seems fine.

Sunshot Campaign Arc

Timeskip to three months later! The rest of the sects have allied together to take down the Wen Sect (this is what ‘Sunshot Campaign’ refers to, because the symbol of the Wens is a sun). Things aren’t looking good for the Wens, including Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao. Wang Lingjiao hallucinates to the sound of a flute and ends up killing herself. Meanwhile, Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng have teamed up to look for Wei Wuxian. On their way, they start finding piles of Wen bodies killed in a mysterious and grotesque manner involving an unfamiliar method of cultivation.

(Side note: around now is where Jiang Cheng frees Wen Qing from where she was imprisoned by the Wens for being a dirty traitor during the war and gives her the comb of pining he bought way back in the Cloud Recesses arc, telling her that he will help her if she asks. This isn’t...exactly important, except I wanted to note it.)

Eventually, they find a house where Wen Chao has holed up with Wen Zhuliu, and watch as it’s revealed that he has gone through some nasty shit, is terrified and traumatized and badly injured. Ominous signs: begin to happen! Flames going out: happen! Shots of someone climbing slowly and menacingly up stairs: happen! 

Yeah, it’s Wei Wuxian. New and improved, darker and meaner and very sexy about it, and with a new sick-ass flute. He starts attacking Wen Chao, and when Wen Zhuliu moves to attack Wei Wuxian Jiang Cheng jumps down and hangs Wen Zhuliu with Zidian. Lan Wangji confronts Wei Wuxian about this darker and meaner version and Wei Wuxian breaks up with him; Lan Wangji leaves Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian to kill Wen Chao because the family that murders together stays together!

(They won’t, but.)

The war goes on, but the tides have turned, and the Wens are losing. Both of Wen Ruohan’s sons are dead. Soup drama happens here, which I don’t need to explain fully but it is clear that Wei Wuxian is extremely emotionally unstable, and also will no longer carry his sword despite everyone telling him he needs to carry his sword. All is not well with the Wei Wuxian! But nobody knows why. Lan Wangji’s repeated “LET ME FIX YOU” overtures are not well received. Lan Wangji also has a nice conversation about how the Lan rules did not prepare him for moral complexity.

Eventually Nie Mingjue proposes going to attack Wen Ruohan on his own while the others move on the Wen stronghold at Nightless City (at this point, they have received a map of Wen defenses from a ~mysterious spy~). Nie Mingjue is captured, and it is revealed that Meng Yao decided that after getting kicked out of Qinghe he could find a better boss somewhere else. Outside, an undead army shows up to kick everyone else’s ass. Things don’t look good for our heroes!

Wei Wuxian brings out his secret weapon the Yin Tiger Seal and...takes over the undead army. This is very troubling to everyone involved, but it does bring Wen Ruohan out to see what the deal is. Wei Wuxian delivers one of the sickest lines in the entire show:

(i’m restraining myself! trust me! i am!)

so yeah, that’s a normal and reassuring thing to say.

And then Meng Yao stabs Wen Ruohan in the back. And that’s it for Wen Ruohan! Our major antagonist is dead! Surely everything will be fine now.

Well We Won the War, Now What Arc

[cracks knuckles] and here’s where the politics starts.

Ready and totally psyched to step into the power vacuum left by the fall of the Wens is Jin Guangshan! Leader of the Jin Sect, least impacted by the war by vitue of joining up late. He recognizes Meng Yao as his son now that he’s, like, someone that is valuable to him politically, and Meng Yao gets a commensurate name change > Jin Guangyao. Pretty much immediately Jin Guangshan starts manuevering to consolidate power - pushing to marry Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan, pushing to get access to Wei Wuxian’s Yin Tiger Seal, subtly undermining everyone else...the works.

Jin Guangshan is the worst, is what I’m saying here.

Meanwhile, Nie Mingjue is very unhappy about the whole “Meng Yao helping the Wens and fucking with him when he’s captured” thing, but then Lan Xichen (remember, Lan Wangji’s older brother) steps in and reveals that Jin Guangyao was a spy delivering information, actually, and also saved his life when he was on the run from the Wens, so don’t hurt him please. Nie Mingjue is still very suspicious, but he backs off. Subsequently, after agreeing to place the Wen (civilian) captives in a holding camp, Jin Guangyao has them killed (impliedly at the order of his father).

We are given cues that Jin Guangyao is bad news. Like, heavy cues. If you are me this makes you love him.

This is also where Lan Xichen, Nie Mingjue, and Jin Guangyao become sworn brothers, which is a big deal.

Meanwhile, back in Lotus Pier, Wei Wuxian is...not doing so hot! He’s drinking heavily, shirking his responsibilities in a way that is making Jiang Cheng particularly very upset with him, generally being weird and traumatized but nobody knows how to deal with that, or him. Then Jin Zixuan arrives to invite everyone to a special hunt being hosted by his father including Jiang Yanli because he, he means his mom, really wants her to be there.

The hunt goes great! By that I mean Jin Zixuan is a spectacular failure at expressing his feelings to Jiang Yanli, Wei Wuxian almost starts a fight with Jin Zixuan, Jin Zixuan’s enormous asshole cousin gets nasty until Jiang Yanli makes him apologize, in a seriously badass moment. The whole thing comes off with Wei Wuxian really not looking good, including his decision to ditch the celebratory banquet. But also Jiang Yanli getting a liiiiittle closer to something she wants (i.e. Jin Zixuan). Jiang Cheng is like “dude what the fuck” at Wei Wuxian and gets zero percent explanation. Meanwhile everyone in the vicinity pokes at his massive insecurities, because the cultivation world’s favorite activity is actually gossip.

Things only get worse at the very bad after party. This is where we meet Su She again, who has gone and founded his own sect! Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji are sort of bitchy about it. But the real issue comes when Zixun peer pressures Lan Xichen into drinking despite the fact that it’s pretty solidly against the rules of the Lan Sect. Lan Xichen does it with a very “fuck you” smile, despite Jin Guangyao’s attempts to forestall the situation.

(I feel like I have not expressed the relationship between Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen? It’s a whole thing. Let’s just say that it’s a fairly popular ship for a reason.)

Lan Wangji, however, is not as diplomatic as his brother.

And then Wei Wuxian arrives! To ruin another party. Because he found Wen Qing wandering around in the streets and turns out that Wen Ning was taken prisoner by Jin Zixun and friends and removed to whereabouts unknown. Wei Wuxian proceeds to give the sexiest countdown ever to annihilating Jin Zixun if he doesn’t tell him where Wen Ning is.

Wen Ning, unfortunately, is in a pile of bodies. Because the Jin have been...well, experimenting on Wen prisoners, basically. Wen Ning is...not dead in this universe because censorship, but everything makes more sense if you just say “he’s basically dead and Wei Wuxian resurrects him to fuck up everyone in the vicinity who was responsible for his death, which is...everyone other than the other Wens. Eventually Wei Wuxian stops him by yelling his second (courtesy) name that no one else has used for him in speech up to this point (Wen Qionglin), because love is stored in the name. Wei Wuxian gathers up the survivors and takes off only to run into Lan Wangji standing in his way.

They have a point of no return moment. Wei Wuxian basically says “let me go or you have to kill me” only it’s better than that because what he actually says is like “if I’m going to be killed I should be killed by you, then I would know it was right” and it’s a whole fucking thing and anyway Lan Wangji steps aside and lets them all go and it is quite literally “I’m not crying, it’s just raining on my face” except he is also crying.

So...fuck.

Burial Mounds Arc

Wei Wuxian takes the Wens to the one place nobody’s probably going to follow them: namely, the Burial Mounds. Home sweet home!

Outside in the main world, rumors are flying about the army Wei Wuxian is building and the sect he’s planning to found and how ambitious he is and how he’s disrespecting Jiang Cheng and actually Jiang Cheng he probably never loved you anyway and is better and stronger and what are you good for, but I’m saying this out of concern and to be helpful (paraphrased from Jin Guangshan).

Accordingly, Jiang Cheng agrees to go and check things out and see what’s going on in Chez Burial Mounds. What is going on is basically a bunch of civilians eking out a very depressing living. There is also a child, a-Yuan, who is adorable. This will also be important later.

(are you keeping track of all this?)

Jiang Cheng also goes to see Wen Ning, who is...recovering from being dead/undead and Wei Wuxian is working on fixing him. Jiang Cheng says he has to die, and Wei Wuxian has to come home, and things are really bad, man, so stop worrying about these losers and avoid the entire cultivation world being really pissed with you, maybe?

Wei Wuxian isn’t going for it, and tells Jiang Cheng to cut him out of Jiang Sect in order to protect Jiang Sect’s reputation. It’s upsetting. They stage a very dramatic duel and Jiang Cheng announces that friendship ended with Wei Wuxian, he has no new friend actually.

This is also where Wen Qing significantly returns the comb of pining that Jiang Cheng gave her way back (remember that?) and is like. so you wouldn’t’ve helped me and Wen Ning actually, would you. And that is the end of Chengqing as a sidebar ship that never really sailed. Well done, you two.

Meanwhile, Jin Zixuan gets his shit together and proposes to Jiang Yanli by way of making her a lotus pond at Jinlintai. So that’s nice!

A bit later Lan Wangji comes to visit! Only it’s totally coincidental, he was just passing through, that’s all. He and Wei Wuxian hang out for a little while, pretending things are sort of normal, but they have to rush back to the Burial Mounds because the Wen Ning is out. They manage to get him under control and awaken him to proper consciousness again, though! Great! Things are looking up. :)

Lan Wangji does not stay for dinner, though. :(

In my notes I have written “meanwhile...political shitshow” and that is basically a summation of what’s up in places that aren’t the Burial Mounds. Specifically, Jin Guangshan, who seems to have deputized Jin Guangyao to do his dirty work generally, is making noises about how something needs to be done about that Wei Wuxian, and what about that Yin Tiger Seal anyway, doesn’t it seem Yin Iron-like, shouldn’t something like that not be in the hands of a random person? Probably it should be in someone else’s hands instead. Someone responsible with no ulterior motives. You know.

Also in here...somewhere, Mianmian tries to stand up for Wei Wuxian being maybe right about some things, gets shouted down, and decides to leave the Jin Sect entirely. Like...just walks out. Several people look at her like ‘you can do that?’, Lan Wangji is jealous, it is a total boss move. Mianmian hasn’t been a major character but this is important enough and cool enough that I had to mention it.

Jiang Yanli and Jiang Cheng come to Yiling (by the Burial Mounds) for a very secret rendezvous where Wei Wuxian gets to see Jiang Yanli’s beautiful wedding dress and eat some of her famous soup and it is very sweet and nice and Jiang Cheng is like “so do you have a plan for if everyone attacks you” and Wei Wuxian is like “absolutely. I will kill everyone is my plan.”

also possibly Jiang Yanli is already pregnant at this point??? she and Jiang Cheng are certainly exchanging a lot of conspiratorial smiles when she tells Wei Wuxian to give her future son a courtesy name.

She is for sure pregnant later, because there is a baby named Jin Ling who shows up! (Remember that name? No? He was the bratty teenager from episode 2.)  Jin Guangshan does not allow Jin Guangyao to hold the baby, for which he deserves what he gets. For Jin Ling’s 100 day/three month (again! timelines, fuck em) celebration, Jiang Cheng, Jin Zixuan, and Lan Wangji tag team to get Wei Wuxian invited, where he will come and it will be nice and everyone will discuss this Yin Tiger Seal issue like civilized people.

An invitation is sent for Wei Wuxian to come to the celebration! Wonderful! This is in no way going to go horribly wrong.

Oh Shit, Things Went Downhill Fast (Take Two) Arc

It goes horribly wrong.

On the way to Jinlintai to greet his new baby nephew, accompanied by Wen Ning, Wei Wuxian is confronted by - surprise! - Jin Zixun, accusing Wei Wuxian of putting a curse on him. Wei Wuxian denies it, naturally, since he didn’t. Jin Zixun decides the best way to deal with this situation is to kill Wei Wuxian, which will definitely break the curse that Wei Wuxian definitely cast on him.

He attacks, and Wen Ning goes Ghost General on everyone’s ass, and Wei Wuxian brings out his flute. Things are looking pretty hairy when Jin Zixuan shows up to call off the fight, trying to get Wei Wuxian to back down; he does not back down, because that would just mean getting shot full of arrows.

Wen Ning, who seems to have completely lost his mind, fists Jin Zixuan. Through the chest. This does, in fact, kill him.

His dying words are to say that Jiang Yanli is still waiting for Wei Wuxian to show up, just to make everything worse. Wen Ning kills Jin Zixun as well. This is not actually what Wei Wuxian wanted to happen.

Back at the Burial Mounds! In the wake of Jin Zixuan’s death, an ultimatum has been issued to give up the Wen siblings or else. This is pretty clearly (in my opinion) a pretext that doesn’t mean anything, but Wen Qing and Wen Ning have already decided to sacrifice themselves. Maybe they’re hoping it’ll work? Or at least that it’ll give Wei Wuxian some time? Wen Qing knocks Wei Wuxian out so he can’t stop them. The whole thing is really fucking heartbreaking.

Wei Wuxian comes around and goes to Jinlintai, where he sees Jiang Yanli, who is mourning her dead husband who got killed by her baby brother! Cool! She sees Wei Wuxian but he runs before she can say anything, partly because guards have been sicced on him. He is pretty clearly having a mental breakdown, hallucinations and all!

Cut to a gathering of...pretty much everyone important and all their followers at Nightless City, for a combination commemorating the dead/affirming the deaths of Wen Ning and Wen Qing/gearing up to kill Wei Wuxian.

Who spares them the effort of coming to find him by showing up on the roof! He proceeds to sic dark magic on everyone there except, conspicuously, for the Jiang Sect. Lan Wangji arrives to defuse the situation and fails to defuse the situation until Wei Wuxian hears Jiang Yanli calling for him.

Because she’s arrived on an active battlefield! Not her best idea but it’s not like I can actually blame her considering the week she’s having.

Wei Wuxian goes to look for her, as does Jiang Cheng who also heard her, and...suddenly loses control of his dark magic. Cool! One of the...undead? people there wounds Jiang Yanli. Even better! Jiang Cheng pleads with Wei Wuxian to get things under control, which he can’t! They have a moment while a lot of people around them are dying but you know what, they deserve it.

because like literally a second later Jiang Yanli pushes Wei Wuxian out of the way of a sword meant to stab him in the back and instead takes it herself. And dies.

So. Yeah.

Wei Wuxian loses the last threads of his sanity and destroys the Yin Tiger Seal. While everybody is fighting over it, he goes over to the edge of a cliff, and now we’re back here where we started! With Lan Wangji clinging to Wei Wuxian’s hand as he dangles over the edge of a cliff and tells him to let go.

Jiang Cheng arrives to defuse the situation, by which I mean “he tells Wei Wuxian to go die and stabs down.” He only hits rock; Wei Wuxian breaks himself loose of Lan Wangji’s grip and falls. You are left on the image of Lan Wangji’s absolutely devastated face.

nice! great. well, that brings us up to speed for the flashforward to the future, where you have probably completely forgotten what happened in the first two episodes.

For instance: remember how we saw Wen Ning despite the fact that he’s supposed to be ashes? Yeah.

And We’re Back in the Present Now Arc (Good Times in Qinghe Arc)

For some reason this is the part of the show where I remember the least and it all kind of blurs together with the exception of one scene? so I had to go look at Wikipedia episode summaries to make sure I was putting things in the right order.

Back in the present at the Cloud Recesses, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji discover that the very angry sword spirit last seen killing people at Mo Manor (remember that?) is pointing them in the direction of Qinghe (the Nie Sect territory). They leave to go there and run into Jin Ling, who semi-accidentally terrorizes Wei Wuxian by way of dog. 

By asking around, they also learn that there are rumors of a man-eating fortress in the woods, and that it hasn’t been dealt with because the leader of the Nie Sect is absolutely useless. The leader of the Nie Sect who is now - hey, been a while! - Nie Huaisang, since his older brother disappeared under mysterious circumstances after losing his mind years ago.

The dynamic duo go off to investigate the man-eating fortress, naturally, and what they find is a tomb full of swords and a wall full of skeletons, and also Jin Ling. 

They remove Jin Ling from the wall, Lan Wangji goes chasing a mysterious attacker, and Wei Wuxian takes Jin Ling to safety only to end up running into - oh boy! - Jiang Cheng. 

They have a calm talk about their feelings and address their dysfunction in a reasonable manner. 

Nope! Jiang Cheng corners Wei Wuxian with Jin Ling’s dog, throws a cup of tea at a wall, and yells at Wei Wuxian about how he both didn’t come home right away and also how he should die ten million times (no, like, actually). Fortunately, Jin Ling arrives, lies out his ass about how he saw Wen Ning to get Jiang Cheng to leave, and lets Wei Wuxian go. 

Back to that mysterious figure Lan Wangji went running after! Turns out it was none other than Nie Huaisang, who confesses - reluctantly - that the man-eating fortress belongs to his family and is a safe home for bloodthirsty swords after their owners die, which is a normal thing to get as a family heirloom. This is also where it becomes increasingly clear that (a) the sword spirit is Baxia, Nie Mingjue’s sword, and (b) Nie Mingjue is most likely hella dead, specifically murdered. 

With this new information, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian move on, tracking the directions of the angry sword spirit. They overhear some very depressing story about Song Lan, Xiao Xingchen, and Xue Yang, specifically how things turned out horribly for them (though without details), which drives Lan Wangji to drink.

Lan Wangji cannot hold his liquor, at all. Wei Wuxian takes his unconsciousness as an opportunity to flute Wen Ning to him again, and removes a massive metal needle from his skull, which fixes the whole “unconscious zombie” issue. Unfortunately, Wen Ning remembers nothing about what happened to him between going to Jinlintai with Wen Qing and when he heard Wei Wuxian calling by way of flute.

And now we have Drunkji, who is the most adorable, hilarious thing ever. He gives Wei Wuxian chickens, with utmost sincerity. They are wedding chickens. It is very important that Wei Wuxian have these chickens.

This interlude is not important to the plot but it is hilarious. There is also a not hilarious interlude of Lan Wangji being very sad about how he didn’t help Wei Wuxian before, and also admitting that he likes rabbits. Again: not plot important. It is adorable. 

Wei Wuxian herds Drunkji back to the inn, where a mysterious masked man attempts to steal the pouch holding the angry sword spirit, but is driven off and teleports away. Remember this guy! He’s important.

The next morning, they set off and hit the road for a place called Yi City, which if you’ve spent any time on this blog you know is deeply important in my heart if not, like, in terms of show space.

Yi City Arc Yi City Arc Yi City Arc

yes this is three episodes but this is my summary post so I get to give it its own section if I want to.

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji arrive at Yi City, which is empty, and very spooky. They run into the pack of juniors (Jin Ling, Lan Sizhui, sassmaster Lan Jingyi and consummate romantic Ouyang Zizhen are the named ones), and shortly thereafter into a whole bunch of undead. They also run into a ghost (???) girl who is blind and has no tongue. They also also run into Xiao Xingchen, severely wounded.

Psych! It’s Xue Yang in disguise and he has an undead Song Lan under his control. what a fun twist this is! and he wants one thing specifically: for Wei Wuxian to help him bring someone back to life. Problem is that their soul is in need of some serious super glue and super glue doesn’t work on souls.

Xue Yang informs Wei Wuxian that his consent is optional and he will be participating in Xue Yang’s necromancy experiment fantasies whether he likes it or not. Lan Wangji objects strenuously to this idea. While Lan Wangji is fighting Xue Yang and Wen Ning is fighting Song Lan (corpse fight! corpse fight!) Wei Wuxian herds the juniors into a safe courtyard where the corpses won’t go, led by the aforementioned ghost girl, who shows them a coffin.

the coffin has Xiao Xingchen in it. The actual real one. There’s a bandage over his eyes, because he doesn’t have any.

Wei Wuxian goes into the ghost girl’s memories in order to find out what happened using a technique called Empathy, and the next chunk of things I’m just going to tell in full chronologically even though there’s a break where you don’t see all of it until an episode later.

The ghost girl, a-Qing, is a con artist who pretends to be blind; she runs into Xiao Xingchen (who is actually blind) when she steals his money, and he just gives it to her after stopping someone else whose money she stole from beating him up. A-Qing decides they’re friends now. They’ve been traveling together for...some amount of time when they stumble on a badly injured man on the side of the road. Xiao Xingchen picks him up and takes him home with him (to an abandoned coffin house in Yi City). You get one guess who he’s rescued and who is totally psyched to discover that his life has been saved by Xiao Xingchen, who doesn’t know who he is, because he’s blind.

So you know, everything is coming up Xue Yang.

What follows is three years of domestic bliss, including hits like “entire villages dying by Xiao Xingchen under sort of suspicious circumstances” and “threatening grocers.” And then who should show up but Song Lan! Looking for Xiao Xingchen and he’s so happy to have finally found him.

Only he notices Xue Yang first.

A fight ensues, in which Xue Yang...sort of talks Song Lan to death by digging into the fact that Xiao Xingchen is blind because he gave his eyes to Song Lan, actually, and Song Lan hurt him so bad when they broke up, and because Xiao Xingchen is blind Xue Yang has been able to trick him into killing living people when he thinks he’s killing undead ones, and oooh do you feel bad now, well, guess what, you’re gonna feel worse when I poison you into becoming undead and cut out your tongue. :D

And even worse when this means that Xiao Xingchen stabs him because, you know, undead monster.

Cool! Things are going great.

Or they would be only a-Qing saw everything, reveals it to Xiao Xingchen, who puts it together and greets XueYang coming back from grocery shopping with a sword (rude). They break up, and by “break up” I mean “Xue Yang reveals his tragic backstory, Xiao Xingchen is not convinced that his tragic backstory means all the murder was justified, Xue Yang decides it’s time to make this all go nuclear.” So tells Xiao Xingchen about how he’s been killing people actually! And guess what, bonus, one of those people was your BFF/life partner/whatever, Song Lan. isn’t that amazing, Xiao Xingchen, isn’t that so cool--

Xiao Xingchen kills himself and this is, it turns out, Not What Xue Yang Wanted. So guess who’s in the pouch Xue Yang was hoping to resurrect? Yeah.

Back in the present, with help from a-Qing directing Lan Wangji, Xue Yang gets...hella stabbed, but not before he kills a-Qing. Song Lan, freed from Xue Yang’s control, kills Xue Yang.

Oh yeah, and then we see Xiao Xingchen tenderly laying pieces of candy on a bed, which is symbolically important, and also Xue Yang dies looking at the last piece of candy Xiao Xingchen gave him, and now I’m going to cry. anyway Yi City Arc, you’re welcome. Where the only person who survives did not, in fact, survive!

Oh, yeah, I guess it’s also important that there’s a headless body buried here and it gets...pretty conclusively identified as Nie Mingjue because the sword spirit (remember that?) takes the shape of his very distinctive large sword (Baxia). Also Xue Yang recreated the Yin Tiger Seal but it gets snatched away by the masked man from earlier. There’s also a bunch of stuff about the Yin Iron plot but you can ignore it, it doesn’t actually really matter that much.

Honestly at that point I was crying too much to pay a whole lot of attention to the whole point of them being in Yi City to begin with. So sue me.

The Plot Thickens, and Secrets Are Revealed Arc

Exeunt Yi City, rendezvous with Lan Xichen to discuss, obliquely, who could be responsible for Nie Mingjue’s death. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji delicately imply that maybe it was Jin Guangyao; Lan Xichen is unconvinced and informs us that there are no curse marks indicating that he’d teleported on Jin Guangyao’s body, he would know, and also they’ve been together every night so he wouldn’t have time to get up to shenanigans anyway.

Hm.

Still, they go ahead together to ruin another party/investigate at Jinlintai, with Wei Wuxian safely in disguise (barely), unfortunately as Mo Xuanyu, who is not exactly welcome in the Jin Sect because he got kicked out of it earlier. Mo Xuanyu is a whole...thing that I’m not really going into here because the show doesn’t really get into it either.

Wei Wuxian ducks out to investigate, and in the form of an animated paper man, to the tune of music we have never heard before in this show and will never hear again (look, it’s just weird to me), goes sneaking into Jin Guangyao’s rooms to do some poking around. His investigations are interrupted when Jin Guangyao’s wife Qin Su, in a state of severe distress, returns, followed shortly by Jin Guangyao. They argue about an unknown revelation in a letter Qin Su received that has resulted in her being disgusted by...something, we don’t know what, and angry with Jin Guangyao. She accuses him of killing their kid.

Eventually he paralyzes her and removes her to a secret room through a mirror, which is a thing everyone has, especially one with a bunch of torture instruments and a body sized table with dried blood on it. Normal!

Remember how the body in Yi City was headless? Yeah, we found the head now.

And it’s time for another Empathy flashback! 

Empathy Flashback feat. Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao’s Bad Relationship Mini Arc

This time with Nie Mingjue (and Jin Guangyao). We see Jin Guangyao very quickly elevated from a servant who is spat upon by the other Nie cultivators to Nie Mingjue’s right hand man, like, literally in two seconds. Flash forward to episode 10 - remember that? - where Jin Guangyao has just been caught in a compromising murder position. Nie Mingjue accuses Jin Guangyao plotting all along and is a conniving little snake who was in league with Xue Yang (which is a thing that does not make sense, actually), and kicks him out.

We next see Nie Mingjue in Nightless City, having been captured and currently being taunted by a very sexy Meng Yao, who kills some other Nie cultivators and threatens to fuck up Nie Mingjue by shattering his sword (which would be catastrophic and is, we are informed, how Nie Mingjue’s dad died). Nie Mingjue is understandably rather displeased by this to the point of probable murder, though Lan Xichen reminds him (as he did in the previous scene) that Meng Yao was acting as a spy and Meng Yao argues that he needed to play his part.

The relationship between the two of them continues to deteriorate as Nie Mingjue becomes more unstable (something that just happens to the Nies by virtue of their cultivation style). That deterioration is being delayed by healing music from Lan Xichen. Lan Xichen teaches Jin Guangyao the healing music. Jin Guangyao seems to be possibly doing something not healing with the healing music.

This all escalates into a confrontation at the top of the stairs of Jinlintai, where Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao argue about class politics and justifiable violence (no, really) until Nie Mingjue explodes and kicks Jin Guangyao down the stairs. 

And then proceeds to, as Jin Guangyao looks on, have a qi deviation, which is...well, let’s just call it both a physical and a mental breakdown. Nie Huaisang arrives to see this happening, and while we saw this before and it looked like Nie Mingjue was threatening Nie Huaisang because he didn’t recognize him, this time it is more apparent that he’s directing it at Jin Guangyao.

Next we see, Nie Mingjue is chained to that body sized table in the secret room. Xue Yang is there, and uses Nie Mingjue’s sword to behead Nie Mingjue. He’s psyched as hell about it. If you’re me this is adorable.

And Now Back to Our Regularly Scheduled Programming Arc

Flashback ends! And we are back in Jinlintai. Wei Wuxian goes to get Lan Wangji and Lan Xichen to storm Jin Guangyao’s bedroom, to which Su She objects, but Jin Guangyao eventually allows. They all file together into the secret room and look around, but there is no longer any severed head where Wei Wuxian left it. Whoops. 

Then Qin Su kills herself, Jiang Cheng arrives to defuse the situation while Jin Guangyao pleads innocent, and Wei Wuxian, by way of drawing his sword that nobody else could draw before now, reveals that he is, in fact, Wei Wuxian. Everyone in this room actually already knew this information except for Jin Ling, who is not thrilled to discover that his cool uncle is the guy who murdered his parents. Nobody else does a very good job of faking surprise.

Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian make a run for it only to be cornered on the stairs. Extreme romance ensues where Lan Wangji announces his intent to stand by Wei Wuxian forever against the world. 

This is where the “I was like, SCREAMS” meme kicks in.

Anyway, after that love confession (look, they can’t say ‘I love you’ but basically) in front of everyone, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian fight their way out together and are well on the way to freedom when Jin Ling stabs Wei Wuxian. 

Nobody is happy about this, including Jin Ling.

Wei Wuxian is okay overall, though he does faint and have to get swept off to the Cloud Recesses and undressed and redressed in Lan Wangji’s underwear. Don’t worry about it. And now it’s time to talk to Lan Xichen, who is currently feeling very “what the hell is going on, you have no proof and are accusing a person I trust completely of something horrible without any proof.” 

They still don’t have any proof, but Wei Wuxian reveals that in the flashback he heard Jin Guangyao playing the soothing music but different, and it comes out that there is evil Japanese music that can kill people and be used to poison someone slowly over time. It’s literally this post:

Lan Xichen is not entirely convinced but agrees to investigate; Jin Guangyao comes to Cloud Recesses and has an absolutely heartbreaking conversation with Lan Xichen about how is our friendship over, Zewu--jun :( while Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji eavesdrop.

That conversation isn’t plot important either, I just personally find it very upsetting.

The Burial Mounds, Take Two Arc

Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji leave the Cloud Recesses, heading toward the Burial Mounds because Jin Guangyao mentioned something being up there. But they end up meeting - surprise! - Mianmian, who is living her best life. This is mostly important because she is literally the only female character who makes it out of this show alive. 

She mentions that there’s been some trouble around the Burial Mounds, so they head in that direction, running into Wen Ning along the way, who has been following them around because he loves Wei Wuxian. The Burial Mounds are indeed full of active undead and they fight their way up to the old farming commune location, which is less empty than expected because there are a bunch of kids tied up in Wei Wuxian’s old lair/cave/house. Like, all of them. Including Jin Ling, who really is having a terrible time lately, and I just feel the need to note that sometimes.

As they free the children and start to leave, everyone else arrives with the plan of killing Wei Wuxian again, because once wasn’t enough and obviously he’s Up To No Good, where else would these corpses be coming from, huh? 

Speaking of corpses. 

A small army of them shows up! All the cultivators who aren’t children lose their powers! Everyone has to retreat back into the lair/cave/house where they’ll be safe! So this is all...going well.

Fortunately, everyone being stuck in one place gives Wei Wuxian the opportunity to get his Hercule Poirot on and walk everyone through a series of deductions to get them to a place of realizing that (a) they were poisoned by evil music, (b) the evil music came from Su She, (c) Su She is working for Jin Guangyao who (d) planned all of this whole ‘everyone is going to the Burial Mounds to get killed’ thing.

Su She panics, inadvertently reveals that he alone still has his powers, and teleports out. Wei Wuxian decides that a reasonable solution to all these problems is to make himself bait for all the undead so everyone else can make a run for it, because Wei Wuxian is kind of like that. 

It’s okay, though, he and Lan Wangji make a spectacular battle couple.

(Oh, yeah. Throughout here it is becoming increasingly clear that Lan Sizhui’s identity is Significant and actually we Might Have Seen Him Before.)

Back to Lotus Pier Arc, or Jin Ling Has a Very Bad Day, Continued Arc

Safely out of the Burial Mounds thanks to Wei Wuxian, everybody goes ahead and invites themselves back to Jiang Cheng’s house. To be fair, it is closest. 

My notes here say “Wen Ning figures out that Lan Sizhui is a-Yuan, Jin Ling has an emotional breakdown” which is a more or less accurate summation of the situation. Honestly, though, I feel so bad for Jin Ling at this point, he’s had an absolute nightmare of a month and then today happened and like. I feel for him.

But Wen Ning reuniting with the last remaining member of his family! Though he doesn’t...actally tell Lan Sizhui this, and Lan Sizhui doesn’t have any memories of his early years. 

Jiang Cheng reluctantly allows Wei Wuxian inside. Wen Ning has to stay on the porch, but Lan Sizhui stays with him to keep him company, because he is a good boy.

This next part...hoo boy. It’s a lot of exposition featuring two ladies who appear to relate their stories about Jin Guangyao, featuring the part where he murdered his father by using a bunch of sex workers (who then were murdered in turn, except for one), also involving necrophilia, and the one where Qin Su was Jin Guangyao’s sister, actually, and he knew it and still married her. Sect Leader Bad Takes says that’s probably why Jin Guangyao killed their kid, because children of incest inevitably have developmental problems? Yeah, sure, buddy.

Anyway, everyone starts shouting for Jin Guangyao’s head, which is very familiar to Wei Wuxian, who leaves in some disgust. While wandering with Lan Wangji, they wind up going to the family shrine (which is, to be clear, a pretty sacred place). Which is where Jiang Cheng finds them! And once again they have a reasonable and emotionally steady conversation.

Nope. Jiang Cheng talks shit trying to provoke a fight that Wei Wuxian won’t have. As he and Lan Wangji attempt to leave, Jiang Cheng pursues because he’s not done yelling dammit, lashing out with Zidian. Wei Wuxian faints, and Wen Ning arrives to stand in between him and Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng, holding Wei Wuxian’s sheathed sword (remember, the one nobody other than Wei Wuxian can draw). Wen Ning proceeds to initiate one of the single best devastating beatdowns of the show without laying a hand on Jiang Cheng, specifically by shoving the sword at Jiang Cheng and telling him to draw it, because hey you can do that now! Wonder why that is? Wouldn’t you like to know what’s going on there, Jiang Wanyin?

Remember way back when Jiang Cheng lost his core and got it back because Wei Wuxian gave him his core? Yeah, this is when he finds out about that. Psych! Your brother loves you and also the only reason you got to be as strong as you are is because he sacrificed himself for you! Which is also the reason why he took up demonic cultivation in the first place! 

Seriously, it’s so good, I love this scene. Probably one of my favorites in the whole show.

Jiang Cheng runs away; Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian have a moment on a lake where Lan Wangji indulges Wei Wuxian by eating stolen lotuses with him. It’s sweeter than it sounds when I put it like that.

Guanyin Temple Arc

oh god, how do I. how do I describe Guanyin Temple. partially this is hard because by virtue of censorship about dead bodies, among probably other things, there are huge gaps that make portions of it make no sense so I’m gonna go ahead and...fill in some of those that are intelligible pretty much only with some knowledge of book plot, imo.

Wen Ning, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian go to a place called Yunping because Jin Guangyao bought some land there for some reason. There they find a slightly suspicious temple (Guanyin Temple). They come back at night, leaving Wen Ning to stand guard, and spy on the courtyard, where a bunch of conspicuously armed monks are there, along with Lan Xichen aaaaand...Jin Guangyao. 

Jin Ling arrives! And decides it’s a good idea to climb over the wall. Wei Wuxian blocks someone from shooting him by using the bamboo flute he’s been using this whole time, so he now functionally has no weapon, and also he and Lan Wangji have been exposed, so now the two of them and also Jin Ling are in the courtyard. Lan Xichen admits he was tricked and doesn’t have any of his powers. Jin Guangyao threatens Lan Wangji into sealing his by threatening Wei Wuxian with a wire. It’s sexy.

Everybody goes inside the temple, where several monks are digging up something ??? under the floor. This is never explained and that is because it is supposed to be Jin Guangyao’s mother’s body, and there are very strict rules I understand about what can be done with dead bodies in dramas like this one. Anyway, Jin Guangyao loved his mom very much and built a temple where she was buried where the statue has her face. He is exhuming her so he can take her body with him when he flees the country, which is what he was planning here. Of course, now he has a bunch of unwanted hostages (and one wanted hostage), which was not actually part of the plan.

The next person to join the party is an unconscious Nie Huaisang, brought in by Su She, who basically says “I have no idea what he was doing here but...here he is” and Jin Guangyao is like. Well, guess he’s here now. 

Next to show up is Jiang Cheng! Making an excellent and extremely dramatic entrance. Unfortunately, he still gets injured and taken down as Jin Guangyao starts poking at his very obvious emotional weak spots, including revealing that Jiang Cheng knows about the golden core thing. Wei Wuxian, who did not know that secret came out because he was unconscious at the time, goes “wait, what?” and thus ensues the epic emotional catharsis crying and yelling conversation I was waiting for for 47 episodes. Seriously, it’s really good. They end up in a place where all is not solved but things are...maybe a little better? 

Of course, they’re still hostages. 

Meanwhile, back at the dig site, something gets unearthed that is not Jin Guangyao’s mother’s body but is in fact a coffin with Nie Mingjue’s body, now complete with head, in it. The reveal also drops here that Su She has the marks that indicate he cast the curse on Jin Zixun that Jin Zixun accused Wei Wuxian of casting.

A very ugly argument ensues where everyone is poking at everyone else’s things that they’re sensitive about, until finally Lan Xichen recovers his powers and turns the tables on Jin Guangyao by putting a sword to his neck. 

The next part is basically...explaining how all the bad things that happened were Jin Guangyao’s fault? Or at least that’s the explanation given. I find it personally very frustrating as a narrative choice and sort of unnecessary, but maybe that’s just me. Anyway, Jin Guangyao is pleading for mercy from Lan Xichen, saying he’ll leave and never return, the whole thing is very emotional. 

We also find out that Jin Guangshan kicked Jin Guangyao down the stairs. People really need to stop doing that.

And now Wen Ning arrives! Punting Lan Sizhui in ahead of him. He is possessed by a very angry sword spirit (namely, Baxia). Lan Wangji cuts off Jin Guangyao’s right arm, because Lan Wangji likes doing that, apparently. Baxia-possessed Wen Ning then targets Jin Ling because Jin Ling has Jin Guangyao’s blood on him - only for Wen Ning to stop the blade with his bare hand and save Jin Ling’s life, because Wen Ning is both a badass and very good. 

Jiang Cheng throws Wei Wuxian his old flute, which he apparently has just been keeping under his bed or something for sixteen years, which is a thing that I will always never be over, and Wei Wuxian flutes the very angry sword into the Nie Mingjue-holding coffin.

Which would be fine, only then Nie Huaisang starts yelling about how Su She totally stabbed him, no, really, look, he’s bleeding. Baxia kills Su She. Then Wei Wuxian manages to put the sword back in the coffin, as well as the Yin Tiger Seal, and locks both away.

Whew.

Everybody’s sitting down and recovering a little as Lan Xichen tends Jin Guangyao’s wounds. He turns around to get medicine from Nie Huaisang, who tells him to look out because Jin Guangyao is attacking you!!! 

Lan Xichen runs Jin Guangyao through. 

Oh boy.

Jin Guangyao is a little impressed about Nie Huaisang having been plotting this all along. Because he was. He absolutely was. He’s absolutely been planning this for years. Everybody needs a hobby.

But it’s Lan Xichen who he really addresses here, telling him that he’d never hurt him. The actual line really hurts but I’m trying to not reproduce lines here, except I am going to say that he drags Lan Xichen - still with a sword through him! - deeper into the temple and says “stay and die with me” as the temple starts to collapse. Lan Xichen, who was about to strike and presumably push himself away, lowers his hand, and Jin Guangyao abruptly pushes him away and out of the collapsing building.

Romance!

(No, but seriously, it’s a lot.)

Thus ends Jin Guangyao. 

Outside in the courtyard, everyone’s taking a breather. Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian stare longingly at each other across the room and say nothing. Jiang Cheng walks away and we learn that - surprise! - the reason Jiang Cheng was caught by the Wens way back when is because he was keeping the Wens from catching Wei Wuxian instead.

Everybody in this family in just a big circle of self sacrifice. In the words of Wen Qing:

(Who misses Wen Qing? I do!)

Anyway, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian leave with each other, only to be caught on the road by Lan Sizhui and Wen Ning - Lan Sizhui, who has remembered that he was a-Yuan and finally someone tells Wei Wuxian this, and ahhhh, okay, I know what I said about limiting screencaps but I can’t not:

Now that’s what I call a hug!

They part ways again, Lan Sizhui leaving with Wen Ning for some family time and for Wen Ning to find his own way. Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian...seem like they’re going in different directions, but then they’re at Cloud Recesses together, playing music, hanging out, vibing. They talk to Nie Huaisang, but don’t directly confront him about his scheming. Mostly just making sure he’s not, you know, gonna do anything else.

Then Wei Wuxian leaves to go on a roadtrip to find himself. People really do not like this, but I personally really do like this, especially because the last shots of the show are Wei Wuxian playing his and Lan Wangji’s theme song (the one that Lan Wangji wrote, remember, from the cave? It’s come up a lot, I just haven’t mentioned it here), and when he finishes Lan Wangji’s voice says “Wei Ying” and he turns around and just like. Smiles. It’s scrunchy and happy and perfect.

Like this:

aaaaaaand scene! fifty episodes later your life has been ruined and you will never be the same.

and the thing is that this is leaving out, like. a lot, and probably is biased because I focus on different things than another person would, &c &c, but at least it might be a starting point for...the entire plot.

and also congratulations if you made it this far, I am impressed. have a screenshot of wei wuxian as a reward, whose mental breakdown does make him look sexy

you’re welcome.

[thefledglingdm]

Umm can I request directors commentary for literally any Leopika fic you’ve written??? Love your stuff!

❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

ahhahaha thank you so much! yes, absolutely! this is going to be long, because i have decided to do that scene in light of my life, pain of my ass. beware LONG BULLSHIT and spoilers below the cut!

ok to set the scene. i was TERRIFIED to write this part. because this is the climax, you know? we've had 150k words of build-up and emotional tension to this scene. while this has been a romantic story, this is the actual climax of the story. we've spent all this time in kurapika's head as he's dealt with his anxiety, his need for control, his fear of letting go. how he's changed as he's opened up his heart and his life to people outside. and finally he's actually working through all of his emotions and the progress he's made out loud, in front of everyone. and because he forgot about giving his speech until like five minutes before (sorry, kp), he is forced to speak from the heart.

For five agonizing seconds, Kurapika stood alone in the middle of a silent room. Above him, the string lights coalesced into a single shared point of soft white light that illuminated his space.

i so wish this could be adapted to, like, netflix or made into a movie. i put so much into this imagery. the play on light? the cinnamon topography? *chef's kiss* yes please netflix CALL ME.

Everyone in his life was staring at him expectantly, Pairo and Altair and Gon and Killua and Nanika and Alluka and Kalluto and his parents. And approximately a hundred other people on top of that, extended family on both sides, industry insiders, coworkers. All staring at him and waiting for him to say something amazing and powerful and deep about love and what did Kurapika know about love, anyway? He was a thirty-two year old trans man so terrified of his own emotions, so paralyzed by his fear of loss, that he did not figure out he was in love with his best friend until three weeks ago.

this is me screwing the knife in deeper for poor kurapika, sorry. this is so incredibly horrifying for a person with anxiety, as someone with anxiety. behold, the terrifying ordeal of being known.

Five seconds. Kurapika finally found Leorio standing near the back, leaning against the bar. He wondered if Leorio picked the same spot where they sat together the very first time they came here on purpose. Leorio sent him a wink and a thumbs-up.

the terrifying ordeal of being known and being so, so loved anyway. it was great to write in a way that showed leorio realized he was in love with kurapika first (indeed, realized that kurapika was in love with him before kurapika knew himself), because these little interactions shows so much how leorio is inviting and allowing kurapika to come to him on his own time. and supporting him the whole way, because they are friends!!!!

Breathe, Kurapika thought. Just breathe. It’s going to be okay.

this statement was not supposed to be a running theme/motif, but i'm super glad it did! i wrote it as a one-off line for melody, but then i was like, hang on, that's kinda good? every other time i write i'm like, hey, you could make a theme out of this!

“Um,” Kurapika started, his voice cracking. Christ, he sounded seventeen again. He cleared his throat.

my friends told me about how their voices changed and dropped on T. any trans person is stronger and more powerful than any us marine.

“For those of you who may not know, I’m Pairo’s brother. Kurapika. His older one, just to be clear.”

this is definitely something that has happened like a hundred times.

There was a smattering of chuckles around the room. He twisted to look at Pairo. “I’ve known Pairo since he was a toddler dragging a ragged, threadbare T-Rex plushie around behind him. I was there when he read his first chapter book on his own – Dino Hunter, of course – because he came bursting into my room at two o’clock in the morning to tell me about it.” Another round of laughter. “I was there when he got his first notebook, when he won his first writing contest, when he was published in his first magazine. I was the first person he told about liking boys instead of girls. I’ve watched him grow and learn and fall in love. And now Altair is part of our family, too.”

pairo and kurapika's lives as brothers were amazing. dino hunter is a reference to the book they both read in the manga that led to kurapika wanting to leave the kurta and explore the world.

i also thought that writing fit pairo well because it's a pretty accessible career for his eyes. he could type, he could enhance the screen and font when he needed, and he could do talk-to-type. one day i want to write a side-story of when pairo and altair met, because i have it perfectly formulated in my head and it's adorable.

Kurapika took a deep breath, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear. He confessed, “To be perfectly honest, I was scared when Pairo asked me to do this, because I’ve run out of things to teach him. He’s run on ahead of me in life. Settled down, moved in with his boyfriend – now husband, congratulations on that by the way – and gotten married, while I’m perpetually single and living alone in my loft apartment with an absolutely spoiled monster of a cat. Stop laughing, that wasn’t supposed to be a joke.”

emperor the cat was also not intended to be a character. i came up with him like, right before i started writing the chapter.

i think it was hard for kurapika to watch his brother fall in love and move on ahead in life. even if he was genuinely happy for them both. i had a conversation with a coworker a few months ago where we both talked about how we feel like we are "behind," even though we're both very accomplished. she felt like she was "behind" because i have a master's degree; i felt like i was "behind" because she was happily married and already had a child on the way (who is here and beautiful and perfect). and i imagine kurapika wondered if he was falling behind or missing something when he saw his brother succeed in love and business without really trying.

but there's no competition at all, of course. the world spins on, and we grow and change and find our place in our own time. there's no race.

The room quieted again. Kurapika went on, his eyes flicking over the crowd. He was starting to smile, too, now.

he's starting to realize this is okay, he's not going to mess up, he may actually have something worthwhile to say or share. he's getting more comfortable in all this.

“But I’m also a wedding planner – I know, ironic – and I’ve learned a lot about love from my clients. So if you’ll indulge me, I’d like to share some of those lessons now.”

No one from the back shouted at him to shut the fuck up, that he didn’t have a single clue what he was talking about, so he thought he was safe to carry on.

how funny would that have been??? like, it would have been fucked-up and humiliating, but in any other situation?? hilarious. just killua looking like that dude in mean girls being like HE DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE except it's like HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT LOVE IS.

He thought back to Light of My Life’s various couples, musing over their own rocky paths to the altar and the beautiful, fractured glimpses into their lives they gifted Kurapika and his team. What did they teach him? What did they teach his heart, that terrifying, terrified lump of meat frantically beating in his chest?

More than you think, his heart seemed to be telling him. Trust me; I will guide you through this. Trust me, trust me, trust me.

*"listen to your heart" plays in the background*

also like. trusting oneself and your perceptions and your feelings and your heart is so necessary. it's an important part of healing. and being honest with yourself and your feelings is part of a foundation for all healthy relationships, i think.

also i really like writing alliteratively. the play on words with "terrifying, terrified" was. inspired? terrifying, because kurapika for a long time feared his own heart and feelings, viewing them as a loss of control; and terrified, because his heart is afraid, too. and they are taking this leap together!

And Kurapika explained: “Love isn’t just found in eloquent professions or grand, romantic gestures. It’s supporting each other through your lowest, worst moments and coming out the other side stronger for it. It’s standing together, hand in hand, against the world. It’s in looking at someone simply existing in the world and seeing them as they are: good, beautiful, strong, intelligent, kind. It’s in your communication and your foundation and trusting that all good things will come together in time. It’s in the family that you build together. It’s in the work you each put in to get through the hard times. Together.”

me: yeah uh-huh jj you really did summarize the fic so far.

this is also where i started being sappy and thinking about love. friendly and romantic love. the love i've seen in my friends, the love i feel myself in my relationships.

There. That’s what his clients taught him. Menchi and Buhara; Morena and Theta; Pokkle and Ponzu; Knov and Morel; Knuckle and Shoot; Canary and Amane. But so many more people showed him what love was. He pictured Pairo and Altair on his couch, laughing at him and judging him and helping him put his own puzzle-piece heart together into something cohesive and beautiful. He smiled at his brothers and saw the way they were clutching each others hands, mouths beaming and eyes dewy.

they LOVE their brother so MUCH. their view of the outside looking in for the past year, watching kurapika fall in love, go soft, be happier than they've ever seen him.

He told them, “It’s in the way you can communicate in gestures and looks, and sometimes, without looking at all. It’s in banter and private jokes and finishing each other’s sentences. It’s in casual touches and... pouring their coffee before your own.”

my coffee is never as good as when my partner makes it. my honey-lemon tea is never as good as it is when my partner makes it. my jokes are never as funny as they are when my partner and i finish each other's sentences, build off of each other's quips. we can communicate across rooms with nothing but a look. these little signs of love are everywhere and expressed in so many tiny ways. these examples here are between people in romantic relationships, but these apply to platonic friendships as well.

His eyes swept the room and found Killua and Gon. Gon had his camera hefted onto one shoulder, and Killua stood behind him, arms around his waist and chin on his shoulder. “It’s on the first day you wake up and realize the way you look at the world has changed. The way you open your hands and your heart and give what you have, simply for the joy of being received.”

to love? transcendent. to be loved? incandescent. to love and know that it is valued and cherished and requited?

and this was a callback to killua talking about, of course, how he fell in love with gon like melting ice. like sinking into a bath. and this was also a quieter callback to how gon fell in love. because it wasn't just that he had/has so much love to give, but because for the first time in his life, he got to see it truly received. accepted.

Kurapika saw Killua’s breath catch and Gon’s hand flex over the fingers interlaced over his middle. Heedless of their surroundings and of the running camera, Gon twisted to kiss Killua on the mouth.

SMOOCHES ahahaha!

He turned his head back to Leorio. The man had not moved; indeed, he looked like he was nailed to the floor. His eyes were so intense as they watched him that Kurapika was almost surprised he had not yet burst into flame. Kurapika said, “It’s in the moment you see someone you’ve never met before, but you look at them and just know, to your core, that this is really going to be something.”

leorio realizing something is happening here. something huge is about to happen, is about to change. and he's trying so hard not to dare to hope it might be good. it might be everything.

A chorus of oohs went around the room. Even from this distance Kurapika saw the way Leorio’s face went red, and he ducked his chin, looking bashful and embarrassed.

leorio: holy shit holy shit holy SHIT IT'S HAPPENINGGGG

How was I such a fool before, Kurapika wondered, How was I so blind, so willfully ignorant and oblivious. How did it take me so long to realize you were talking about me. I’m sorry it took me so long to get here. I’m sorry I made you wait for so long.

this is important because it's not just kurapika realizing and accepting his feelings for leorio. this is kurapika's version of realizing that leorio feels the same for him. leorio is in love with him, too. and he's wondering how it was possible he was so scared and blind for so long. he fears he may have hurt leorio by holding off on this for so long, so he wants to be brave, take the leap, and see what they could be.

Kurapika did not want this man to wait another second. He did not want Leorio to spend another moment trapped in this limbo. So he confessed in the middle of a silent room in front of over a hundred people, “It's the first time you hear them laugh, and your entire world’s axis shifts beneath your feet.”

i remember the first time i met my partner. i remember the first time i looked at them and felt my world shift a little to the right. i remember falling in love and thinking that this one was unlike all the others. it was warm, golden, comforting.

Kurapika watched the confused frown on Leorio’s face when he heard that, amused by the almost puppyish tilt to his head as he considered it. He knew the moment Leorio realized what he meant when his eyes blew wide, amazed and awed and achingly soft. His lips parted.

gOD he is so CUTE. he's like oh hmm huh what does that mean

and then he remembers

i promise, he's not a huge dickwad!

and leorio laughing at gon's accidental gaffe and his sweet earnestness. and kurapika walking in. leorio realizing kurapika wanted to know him before they ever even met.

Kurapika made himself turn away from the arresting sight. “One of my favorite venues lately was the Roseview Ballroom downtown. Among its many beautiful, gaudy attractions are its murals depicting scenes from Shakespeare’s plays all across the ceiling. One is a famous quote from Twelfth Night: ‘journeys end in lovers meeting, every wise man’s son doth know.’ But the more I think about it, the less I agree.”

i'm such a WHORE for shakespeare, as any readers of mine will know. check out my modern college adaptation of much ado about nothing.

He turned to meet Pairo’s eyes again, repeating, “‘Journeys end in lovers meeting.’ But nothing is ending here. It’s just changing.”

life does not end when we start relationships! or when they end! or when we move, change jobs, graduate, go to school, drop out of school. happy endings in stories still aren't endings. the greatest constant in life is change.

“Because what I’ve learned in this job, Pairo and Altair, what nugget of wisdom I have to give you, is this. Love is looking at a world that can be terrifying, cold, capricious, and indifferent, and finding the person whose hand you want to hold through it all anyway. Because you want every laugh, every tear, every wrinkle, every spark of joy. Love is life’s greatest leap of faith, because you don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow. But you know exactly who you want to spend all those tomorrows with.”

me finishing this: dammit i just wrote out my wedding vows.

Kurapika looked around the room again. At Gon and Killua; at Kalluto, Nanika, and Alluka; at his parents; at his brothers. At Leorio.

He concluded, “So you simply breathe. And you trust it will be okay.”

There wasn’t a dry eye in the room when Kurapika dropped the microphone.

DAMN ME TOO THIS SHIT WAS GOOD TF?????? sorry my writing has peaked here.

[askcherrypie]

“My Little Pony Gets Political” - saywhatnow?

I have not bothered to see the new MLP movie for the same reason I haven’t seen ANY of the MLP movies throughout the existence of the franchise - they always manage to dumb it down (even the ones made for Gen3). MLP’s problem, prior to Gen4 (Friendship is Magic), was that Hasbro almost invariably wrote insipid material aimed at an audience they didn’t think very highly of - pre-teen girls. Gen4 broke that mold by treating its target demographic as thinking (albeit young) human beings, which meant NOT smacking them over the head with blunt, trite, saccharine nonsense. Sometimes, Gen1 and Gen 2 managed to do the same thing even though they hadn’t been blessed with the initial direction of someone like Lauren Faust.

Unfortunately, Gen5 appears to be reversing Lauren’s course.

The new movie (WELCOME TO SPOILERSVILLE, POPULATION: YOU) was apparently written by people who did not watch Gen4 even though Gen5 is supposedly a sequel. In Gen4, the “three tribes” had legendarily distrusted and feared one another in ages past, a state of affairs which almost got them all killed by an emotionally-predatory species called Windigoes. The resolution to this problem, the unification of all three tribes into a single nation, became celebrated as the pony version of Christmas, complete with gifts and pageants.

So, at some point in the apparently distant future relative to G4, absolutely all of that is forgotten and thrown out the window with not a single reason given. The movie never explains it, although it does take pains to make clear that the heroines of G4 have legendary status - which only one pony seems to know about. The closest we get to an explanation is that magic just stopped working one day for no apparent reason, and BECAUSE of that so did friendship. Which, again, is something that happened in G4 when all the tribes had their magic taken from them AND THEY FIXED IT BY REFUSING TO STOP BEING FRIENDS.

So you have this incredibly pointless situation which appears to have no rhyme or reason and exists solely to give the one pony who remembers G4 even happened a goal: reunite the tribes in friendship.

Um. We did that already. Multiple times.

And then we have a bunch of special morons out there who have decided that anytime there is the appearance of a “military dictatorship” - which itself apparently is a matter of somepony wearing a military uniform (hello, Wonderbolts, hello Commander Spitfire, guess G4 Pegasi are Nazis now) and other ponies standing in ranks as though part of a military organization (hello, entire Royal Guard, guess the Earth Ponies and Unicorns in the Guard are also Nazis now and Celestia was running a military dictatorship the whole time).

idk if the generalissimo is “supposed to be” Trump or not, but if he is that’s even more retarded on at least five levels, starting with the fact that Trump didn’t use military troops to lock down the Capitol out of fear he would be ousted from power by American citizens: Biden is. You know, that whole “insurrection” that the FBI ended up saying never actually existed.

But it’s not just retarded because the (apparent) target is misplaced: it would be just as idiotic of a move to make the character a parody of Biden. Contemporary politics never age well, often because more information later comes to light, making such on-the-nose attempts at portrayal fall flat with future viewers. In the current year, it’s not considered socially acceptable to air or even watch cartoons which propagandized the Axis powers of World War 2. Including actual Nazis, on the argument that laughing at cartoon Hitler getting pied in the face somehow denigrates the Holocaust.

Even more retarded is the argument going around that ANY of this is “fascist imagery”. Those sorts of takes are from people whose only understanding of “fascism” is a style of uniform and a general tendency towards militarism. 

It would be more accurate and appropriate to say these are indicators of totalitarianism. Instead, we are told that the following are full-throated displays of Fascism (directly from one of the schmucks trying to make this argument):

* a leader fearmongering

* dressing in military attire

* use of propaganda posters

* the military marching and assembling

* big posters of the villain being shown during the leader’s speech

Problem: all of these criteria also directly apply to Communist governments throughout history. A Soviet-era May Day Parade is hardly what one would call Fascist, but any number of those Parades matched up with every single item on this list.

Nor is this the first time there was an argument in the fandom about “Nazis” and “Commies”. Fans trying to push their real-world politics on other fans insisted this video was all about either/or - depending on which bunch of totalitarians they wanted to be the “real” villains “the show was speaking against”.

In G4, they were smart enough NOT to try and wedge IRL politics into the show. All of this is specific to circumstances revolving around an attempt at a social revolution in Equestria, where all ponies would lose their “destinies” (as determined by their “cutie marks”), and thus be free and equal to pursue whatever future they “really” wanted.

But Starlight Glimmer never promoted National Socialist ideology, nor Communist ideology. She just wanted to take over Equestria using psychological abuse and mind control.

The new writers don’t appear to be that creative or intelligent. Instead, they’re just trying to map current-day social commentary onto Gen5, at least according to outlets like the New York Times . These were the same sorts of imbeciles who previously claimed MLP fandom “has a Nazi problem” (The Atlantic) or was a haven for school shooters (Rolling Stone).

Don’t let the bastards win. Screw ALL the totalitarians, and when the people insulting you screech that Stalin did nothing wrong, mark them in the same pot as the folks who say Hitler was on the ball. If that ends up including the writers for Generation 5, well, there’s always Generation 6..

[defilerwyrm]

For the ask meme: burning bright, anything about the parts at the table with the Nein. You write their banter so well!

FIC SPOILERS BELOW!

Burning Bright on AO3

The entire dinner scene hit me like a bolt of lightning while I was working on this fic. It started with Beau’s outburst, and then Veth’s willful denial and subsequent fit, and I built the two scenes around that.

Diving into particulars….

“Uhm,” he said, intelligently, but quickly recovered and flashed his friends a smile. “It is most impressive. Certainly a step up from a tiny hut.”

A direct reference to the name of the spell. Originally it was Leomund’s tiny hut. I have no clue why in 5e Wizards decided to 86 the attribution names on so many spells like Otiluke’s resilient sphere and Tasha’s hideous laughter. Things like that always made me curious about the (what I assume were) PCs the spells were named after. I had thought maybe it was because the characters who diegetically invented them were specific to one setting, but in that case I don’t know why Bigby’s hand is still Bigby’s but Evard’s black tentacles are no longer Evard’s. I don’t like it. As an aside, Widowgast’s Nascent Nein-Sided Tower is, mechanically speaking, Mordenkainen’s Magnificent Mansion. Anyway. Moving on!

It was delectable that Caleb wanted to impress him.

This boy hungry and not just for soup

Flustered, Essek tried to fend them off, but it was Caleb that did him in. It was always Caleb. The human took a large roll from his own plate, broke it in half, and offered one of these parts to Essek, who tried his best not to choke.

“You need to keep your strength up, ja?” Caleb implored him quietly.

The steady hand that accepted was a point of pride because it very much wanted to quake. The Kryn weren’t bread people, but...did he have any idea what this gesture would mean in Rosohna? Any inkling at all?

This is another one of those places where I delight in playing to cultural differences. What I’d had in mind for what that gesture—breaking food into two pieces and offering half to someone—WOULD mean in Rosohna was a bit nebulous, as I like to keep the reader guessing a bit and let their imagination fill in the blanks; but my rough idea was that it’s a courting gesture that signifies “I can and will provide for you, even if it means less for me.” An expression of selfless caregiving and an offer of partnership. Not wholly unlike a bird bringing food to a prospective mate.

And actually it’s a little bit funny coming from Caleb, who has fuck-all to his name but his name, when Essek is a rich bitch who answers directly to the Bright Queen.

Not that he was about to say it out loud, but he was a quick convert to this whole bread thing. To say that it won him over would be an understatement. That seemed to be a recurring theme here.

I imagine if I’d grown up never really eating bread and was introduced to it in adulthood I’d be like “Where have you BEEN all my life?!” But also: the bread is friendship, the bread is the Mighty Nein, the bread is communion in the spirit of sharing rather than politics and appearances and power plays—things he thought he was fine without until they were foisted upon him.

Somewhere in the course of the multiple conversations going on at one time, Jester got an Idea, as she was prone to doing. He became increasingly aware of her talking about kissing, of all things, and this culminated in her shouting above the din, cheeks flushed purple though he hadn’t seen her touch any wine: “I have an idea you guys! Why don’t we all go around and say how many people we’ve kissed?”

Jester is the most wonderfully convenient deus ex machina if you ever need to insert an awkward or embarrassing conversation among the Mighty Nein, because this is exactly the sort of shit she would do.

Jester leaped up and slammed her hands onto the table. “Caduceus you’ve never been kissed?! That’s so sad!”

The firbolg was unfazed. He merely shrugged and said, “It hasn’t come up and I haven’t gone looking. Not something I’ve ever thought about, really.”

Jester’s tail lashed back and forth behind her like an overstimulated cat. “Do you want me to kiss you?”

Fjord went a bit wild-eyed at this. Caduceus smiled gently and said, “No thank you.”

Three things about this part:

1) Jester’s tail doesn’t get NEARLY enough mention in fic! If I’m playing (or writing) a character with a tail you can be damn sure you’re gonna know what it’s doing! Makes me wanna play a tabaxi tbqh.

2) Cad’s “No thank you” is the sum total of his sexuality, lol. Jester was raised in a pretty highly sexualized setting, didn’t really get out much before she fled Nicodranas, and can be pretty naïve, so she doesn’t really get the whole aroace thing; but it never crosses Cad’s mind that this would be “abnormal“ or ”sad” in any way—it causes him no distress, as it shouldn’t. This is yet another “Same planet, different worlds” moment.

3) Fjord is physically restraining himself from yelling “JESTER WHAT THE FUCK” lmao

Veth kept picking at it. “So you’re um. You know. Into the fellas?”

Beau snorted. “I could’a told you that months ago.”

“Yeah you could’a!” Veth pouted with a self-conscious curl to her shoulders.

I saw a comment on Tiktok that said Veth was being borderline homophobic, but that wasn’t my intent! It’s just that she inherited a certain blind spot for male queerness from her player, and as hard as she’d been trying to encourage Caleb to hook back up with his female ex, it never occurred to her that he had a male ex, too—and given that they’ve been so close for so long, she’s feeling pretty self-conscious about the fact that she never figured out that Caleb is bisexual in all that time, as well as kind of upset that no one—Caleb especially—told her. She’s having a moment of “Why didn’t I know this? Did you think it was going to change things between us? Did I make you feel unsafe?” And also a little bit of “Okay well, now I have to get him to hook up with TWO people AT ONCE because my boy deserves threesomes 😤”

Jester went goggle-eyed at him. “You’ve only been with one person?” she exclaimed. “But you’re like a hundred years old! And very handsome. I would have thought you’d get like, all the ladies.”

Ladies. Right.

Veth might not be the only one with a certain blind spot.

Beau gave her a funny look, snorting. “I dunno, he seems like the kinda guy who turns down those offers left and right.”

..…But Beau’s got his number, for more than one reason. She’s got super gaydar, for one, and has him pegged as the type who’s very choosy about his partners (also mind you, this was before demi!Essek was canonized by WoG, so I was still rolling with my hc that Essek got around when he felt like it).

The uproar was instantaneous. Everyone—almost everyone—started talking or shouting at once. Beau’s voice rang out among the din with, “HOLY SHIT ESSEK FUCKS.” Strangely pleased with himself, he downed the rest of his wine in one gulp and spent the next few minutes fending off increasingly prying, personal questions until the Nein grew bored with his lack of answers and someone changed the subject.

There it is, the line that spawned two entire scenes!

He was not a war mage, but he was experienced and wily, and he was damned good at what he did, and as long as there was breath left in his body, the Mighty Nein would not fall here.

Joke’s on me, motherfucker literally has the War Caster feat -_-

But like in my defense, that’s just what it’s called in the book. The feat just means that you have either the training or experience to cast well during a fight, which I see as not necessarily the same thing as a war mage, which was my way of saying an arcane caster who is a soldier.

Veth stared at her blankly as if willing herself not to understand. “Caleb? With who?”

She breathed steadily. “...Essek. Caleb and Essek.”

Beside her, Jester squealed and brought her fists to her face.

Veth was less enthused. “WHAT.”

Beau’s mental commentary here is dead on. Veth still doesn’t really trust Essek at this point and has been pretty vocal about that…despite being the one to declare him part of the Mighty Nein? Eh, she’s allowed to have complicated feelings on the guy, all things considered. But I find it kind of comical and very Veth (and very Sam) for her to be all full of zest for trying to get Caleb back together with the frigging Volstrucker who is actively working for his abuser and worst enemy but balk at him hooking up with Essek.

Jester “explained” in a delighted yell: “Caleb and Essek are gonna fuuuuuuck!”

I don’t know, is this too unsubtle to call foreshadowing? The line flowed naturally in the dialogue, but it’s also letting the reader know exactly what they’re in for next, lol.

“...He’s going to break that little elf twink, you know,” Veth said, sounding distant. Seemed she was having some difficulty processing. Not too surprising, considering how adamant she was about wanting their wizard to hook back up with his old flame, the fucking Volstrucker. “We’ve all seen his dick.”

This was 100% taken from Sam’s little throwaway line “It’s above-average” but it turned out to serve two purposes other than reminding the reader that all of these people have seen Caleb naked:

1) It’s yet another thing Veth thinks she understands about him but doesn’t. Caleb’s a top like Dalmatians are purple and if you disagree then I respect your right to be incorrect ;)

2) That said, it is, in fact, foreshadowing for the sequel, in which Essek experiences a great deal of frustration. (I haven’t touched the damn thing in weeks, feels like; I’ve been too busy with work, being exhausted from work, and being in a tizzy about my upcoming surgery.)

Fjord blurted out, “I’ll join you.”

Poor Fjord has had such an uncomfortable night!

Hoo boy that was a lot. Thanks for the ask, this was really fun!! And sorry it took so long; I work Saturday nights and things got really busy for a bit there.

[debbiechanclub]

“Chipped Tooth” - Timothy Thatcher x OFC

Title: Chipped Tooth

Theme: @12daysofchristmas Day 10 - Cookies/Baking/Gingerbread

Fandom/Character(s): WWE NXT/Timothy Thatcher x OFC

Warnings: None! Nothing but fluff here.

Word Count: 1,841

Notes: For the Thotchers! And me, because I’ve been toying with the idea of reviving my OG OFC, Hannah McMahon, and this was the perfect excuse. If you’re interested, The Shield fics I wrote back in the day featuring Hannah are still up on my (inactive) FanFiction page. For current fics, find my masterlist here.

Enjoy!

Tag squad: @champbucks @freshlysqueezedmox @hotyeehawman @comeasyoudar @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @exe-sadboi-exe @librathepheonix13 @gabbynorth98

“Do you think four dozen is enough?”

Hannah put her hands on her hips as she anxiously surveyed the sweets strewn out over her kitchen island: two dozen peanut butter snowballs and two dozen gingerbread men. She’d decided to bake her favorite Christmas cookies for the NXT roster and crew as a small thank you for working two days before the holiday, and she’d thought four dozen would be more than enough. But now that she was done, it didn’t look like nearly enough.

“It’s enough,” Stephanie assured her. Naturally, Hannah had roped her sister and nieces into helping her bake and decorate the cookies. Her nieces had even made specific gingerbread men for specific wrestlers and made her promise she would give them to them. “I think the snowballs are just making it look like less than it is.”

Hannah frowned in contemplation. “True.” She crossed the kitchen and started pulling tupperware out of a cabinet. Now that she thought about it, she doubted the wrestlers would eat very many, anyway, what with how body conscious they all were, and they’d be working with a limited crew. Maybe four dozen would be more than enough.

“So who’d you do this for?” Stephanie suddenly asked.

“What?” Hannah gave her a perplexed look as she walked back over to the island. “It’s for the NXT roster and crew tomorrow, I told you that.”

But Stephanie shook her head. “No; I know you, Han. You don’t just do stuff like this.”

Her eyebrows arched. “Stuff like what? Nice stuff?”

“No,” Stephanie huffed and grabbed a tupperware container to fill with peanut butter snowballs. “Of course you do nice stuff, but you don’t just bake for the hell of it. You had someone in mind when you came up with this.”

Hannah faltered as she reached for a gingerbread man. “What?” she repeated.

“Come on, tell me. Who’re you trying to impress?”

A knowing smirk curled Stephanie’s lips. A blush tinged Hannah’s cheeks a warm shade of pink. She carried on carefully packing up the gingerbread men, hoping she didn’t notice.

But of course she noticed—she was her sister.

“Wade?” she guessed.

Hannah pursed her lips.

“Damian?”

“What?” she returned with a surprised laugh.

Stephanie shrugged. “I don’t know. He seems like someone you could be into.”

Hannah blinked. “No.”

“Well then who?” 

She let out a short, annoyed sigh. Admittedly, Stephanie wasn’t wrong. There was someone she wanted to impress; and she knew Stephanie wouldn’t let it go until she fessed up. 

“Tmm,” she muttered under her breath.

Stephanie’s brow furrowed. “Who?”

“Tim.”

“Tim?”

“Timothy Thatcher!” she blurted. Her entire face went red, and she pressed a lid onto the filled gingerbread container a little more forcefully than she needed to, avoiding Stephanie’s wide-eyed gaze. She just knew there was a smart-ass comment coming, probably about Tim’s teeth—

“Well, that’s not surprising.”

Hannah’s eyes snapped back up. “What?”

“It doesn’t surprise me that you’re into Timothy Thatcher,” Stephanie said. And then, after a second, “He looks like Jon.”

“Oh my God,” Hannah stopped what she was doing to fix her sister with a hard look. “Seriously? I dated Jon for all of three months seven years ago and you think I’m still not over him.” She nearly choked on the words as they came out of her mouth. Not because she wasn’t over Jon, but because the verbal realization that her time managing The Shield had been seven years ago made her feel, well, old.

“That’s not what I said,” Stephanie clarified, cutting into her thoughts. “I just mean Tim is your type. And besides… I know who you’re not over, and if Timothy Thatcher can help you move on from him, then by all means date him. Please.”

Hannah pursed her lips and continued packing up the rest of the gingerbread men. The last thing she wanted to hear right now was Stephanie’s commentary on her personal life. It was part of the reason she didn’t exactly look forward to the holidays—her sister and father always teamed up to nag her about when she would finally settle down and pop out a few kids. You’re not getting any younger, and all that. It was aggravating.

But, as much as Hannah didn’t want to admit it, it hit her a little harder this year. She’d turned thirty-five in the summer. Becky and Seth had just had their baby girl; Jon was going to be a dad. All her friends were building their lives outside wrestling, and she was still the same lonely workaholic she’d always been.

“I think they’ll appreciate the gesture,” Stephanie said, pulling her back to the present again. She could probably tell by the faraway look on her face that she’d been on the verge of being swallowed by her thoughts.

“I hope so,” Hannah anxiously returned. “I hope it doesn’t come off… I don’t know. Like too little a thank you for working two days before Christmas.”

“It won’t,” Stephanie assured. “Everyone down there knows how much you care about them and NXT.”

A smile pulled at Hannah’s lips. She did care about NXT, tremendously. She’d had a hand in signing nearly everyone who’d ever wrestled there; they felt like her extended family. She hoped she knew how much she cared about and appreciated them, especially these days.  

But, mostly, she wanted to make Tim smile. Chipped tooth and all.

* * * * * * * * * *

As Hannah walked into the Performance Center the following evening, containers of homemade cookies in her arms, she couldn’t help but feel a little nervous. It seemed silly—everyone liked Christmas cookies. But she didn’t care if everyone liked them; she cared if Tim liked them. And Tim made her nervous.

He was just… different. Quiet, but well-spoken. Intelligent and thoughtful. He wasn’t flashy and he didn’t need to be because his grit spoke for itself. She liked that. Plus, Stephanie wasn’t wrong—he was her type. She didn’t like pretty boys; she liked men, a little rough around the edges, and Tim was exactly that. And his body… Hannah’s thoughts had a tendency to go to a less-than-professional place whenever she watched him wrestle. She wouldn’t mind being put in one of his submission holds—

“Okay, Hannah, calm the fuck down,” she muttered under her breath. “Now is not the time.”

She crossed into catering and made her way over to the food table. She figured she’d just set the cookies out and let everyone have at them. Oh, and she couldn’t forget to deliver the special gingerbread men to their recipients. Her nieces would kill her if—

“Hey, Hannah.”

She gave a yelp and whirled around, eyes wide and startled, and came face-to-face with Tim. Because of course it was Tim. Her face burned with embarrassment. Perfect. Just perfect.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he apologized with a bit of an amused smirk. Hannah tried to ignore the explosion of butterflies in her stomach it caused.

“No, you’re fine,” she said with a shake of her head. “I didn’t realize anyone else was in here.”

“Well, that’s ‘cause there wasn’t. I came in right after you.”

“Oh.” She fiddled with her fingers, nervous. Did that mean he’d followed her into catering? Or had they just been headed to the same place at the same time?

“What d’you got there?”

He nodded at the tupperware. Hannah hesitated, legitimately forgetting for a second what she’d been doing. “Oh, I thought I’d make some of my favorite Christmas cookies for everyone,” she answered. “Just as a little thank you.”

His eyebrows arched. “You made them?”

Hannah bit her lip and nodded. Tim’s eyes seemed to light up, but she couldn’t be certain.

“What are they?”

“Um,” she glanced down at the containers, as if she needed a reminder of what was in them. “Gingerbread and peanut butter snowballs. Which are peanut butter balls dipped in white chocolate,” she explained—but then her brow furrowed with a sudden thought. “You aren’t allergic to peanuts, are you?”

She hadn’t considered that. Why hadn’t she considered that? But, thankfully, Tim shook his head.

“No, I’m not. I love peanut butter, actually.”

He grinned, and Hannah’s entire body went hot. She had to compose herself before she could respond “Oh. Well, great. Do you want one?”

She whirled around and picked up a snowball before he could say yes or no. The corners of his eyes crinkled with a smile as she handed it to him. Hannah inwardly grimaced; he probably didn’t want one and had only taken it to be polite. But when he bit into it, his eyes lit up—and there was no mistaking it that time.

“That’s really good,” he complimented, his mouth still half-full.

Hannah’s heart thumped. “Really?”

He nodded. “Yeah,” he confirmed as he popped the rest of the snowball in his mouth. “Don’t leave those around me, I’m trying to watch my girlish figure.”

A wide smile broke out over Hannah’s face. She didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t think. Her insides felt like mush.

“But… I have to try a gingerbread man now, too.”

He leaned over the table and grabbed a gingerbread man from the open container. Hannah watched, still half in a daze, as he brought it to his mouth; and then she realized he didn’t have a gingerbread man—he had a gingerbread woman.

“No, not that one!” she shouted in a panic.

Tim froze. “What’s wrong with it?”

Hannah’s entire face went beet red. “Nothing. But um, my niece made that one for Candice.” She pointed at the purple icing hair that decorated the gingerbread woman’s head. “See? It looks like her.”

Tim pulled the cookie away from his mouth so he could look at it. “Oh,” he realized. “It does. Close call; I almost bit off her head.”

Hannah’s stomach flipped at his smirk. “Sorry, I should have been paying attention.” She took gingerbread Candice from him and exchanged it for a regular gingerbread man. “Here—that’s a generic gingerbread man.”

He took the cookie from her outstretched hand. “I don’t know, I think it kinda looks like me,” he said. He pointed at the mouth; it was imperfect and shaky. “See? It’s got a weird tooth.”

If Hannah’s insides had been mush before, they were goo now. Warm, tingly goo. It had been a long time since someone had made her feel like that.

“Thanks for baking us cookies,” Tim said. He started to backpedal away from her, but before he turned around, he took a bite of the gingerbread cookie. He made a noise of satisfaction in his throat. “That’s good, too!”

Hannah bit back a grin. “I’m glad you like it.”

“It’s dangerous,” he returned with a smirk. “I’ll definitely be back for more.” And with that he disappeared out of catering.  

Hannah wiped clammy palms on her jeans. She felt like she was floating. She’d wanted to impress Tim, and she’d done it.

Now she just needed to work up the courage to ask him out.

[cobra-diamond]

Hicks and Yang on Azula Fans

Cult.

Upset.

Scary.

Aggressive.

During the 2019 San Diego Comic Con, an Avatar Q&A was held including Michael Dante DiMartino, Gene Yang and Faith Erin Hicks.

One fan asked about the franchise’s plans for Azula. Here is a summarized transcript of the exchange, with my own commentary:

Fan: “Hi, so the comics have shed light on characters who have a lot more of their story to be told after the Finale. I has wondering if you might be able to, if you have any plans for, expanding on a character you’d mentioned before: Azula.”

I can hear the trepidation in this fan’s voice; they can’t just come right out and say it. I know the feeling: should I feel interested in Azula? Will others understand why? Will they accuse me of minimizing her evil and villainy? Am I minimizing her awfulness in the show? Am I even right to want more Azula?

Yang’s answer:

Yang: “I have to say, in my experience with Azula Fans, it has been almost like a cult [crowd erupts in laughter]. Not saying you are!”

Well, actually, Yang, you kind of are.

And you didn’t answer the question.

You know what’s also a cult following? The Princess Bride movie. But was Yang referring to that kind of cult? No, because nobody would think twice about insulting Princess Bride fans by referring to that movie as having a “cult-like” following.

No, Yang was referring to that kind of cult, the one where if you accuse someone of being a member, you are insulting their intelligence and accusing them of borderline nefarious obsession. Yang was referring to the spooky, deranged kind that believes aliens seeded the Earth with Human life and built the pyramids. Only in the case of Azula fans, the original show seeded Azula with humanity and left the door open for a deep, compelling change-and-growth story in the Post-Finale setting.

Hicks’s answer:

Hicks: “I have to say, for the most part, Avatar fans have been just absolutely lovely to me, but I got this scary e-mail from someone who was an Azula fan and was very upset and aggressively demanding that I write her a certain way. I actually had to shut down my e-mail because it unnerved me so much. And it was a little weird because Azula is one of my favorite characters as well, but it made be scared off, perhaps, from writing her in the future.”

God dammit. Hyper-sensitive and impassioned fans are everywhere. This most certainly occurred. Even Bryke have spoken about getting hate mail from jilted fans. At any rate, to anyone reading this, don’t do this. Clearly Hicks doesn’t have the intestinal fortitude to put up with it, neither will it change hers or anyone else’s minds.

Azula’s place in the franchise isn’t where it is because fans haven’t been loud enough; she’s a secondary character and a villain. If they were ever going to expand her non-villain role in the franchise it would have happened a long time ago. As the articles “She’s Completely Crazy!” and Mirror & Misdirection explain, the piss poor handling of her character comes from a much deeper, unchangeable source in the Creators’ minds.

But the first thing that jumps to Hicks’ mind is one instance of hate mail? Telling this fan she is grouped in with someone who is scary, upset and aggressive? And that is enough to scare her off?? Holy shit. Hooooly shit. She better not be tasked with salvaging, or even writing, anything regarding Azula. Someone tasked with writing Azula, I mean really writing Azula, especially after the mess of Smoke & Shadow, needs far more guts than this. She is far too spooked by fans, and the current canon and lack-of-vision of Bryke is only going to infuriate more.

Hicks’s answer continued:

Hicks: “So please be kind to creators. We’re working very hard on licensed properties. I know none of you guys [the crowd] would do this [send hate mail; crowd erupts in laughter]. Um, I love Azula. I think she’s great. I would like to write her. I would like to write more stories. Gene actually left her place in the world very open-ended. I actually loved the way Gene wrote her. I liked Smoke and Shadow a lot. I think that story and where Azula’s journey went was really fascinating to me. So yeah, I would like to write Azula stories. As of right now, I’m writing new Avatar stories, not necessarily about Azula, but maybe someday in the future. Azula fans, please be nice to me. I’m trying my best.”

First of all, nobody cares about Smoke and Shadow. Yes, nobody. Its popularity on Goodreads nose-dived compared to The Promise and The Search. There are parts of it that are okay and likable, but not the work itself. I will give Hicks the benefit of the doubt that she is just going, “Yes, my Emperor! Your clothes are beautiful!” to her naked overlords. Smoke and Shadow was a mess for more than just Azula and an utter train-wreck for Azula. Don’t read much into that comment by her.

She is scared off from writing Azula, but still wants to writer her. Wants to. Whether we get more Azula shouldn’t come from her wanting to, she should have to if that is the plan for the franchise. More evidence that the franchise has no overarching plan for telling compelling stories about these characters. It doesn’t matter if fans know that Azula is destined to become Zuko’s closest advisor. It doesn’t matter if fans know Zuko and Azula reconcile, as implied by generous interpretations of Smoke and Shadow.

Well, duh!!

Of course that’s going to happen. It’s the only logical outcome that is consistent with the themes of the show. Fans don’t want to be told what happens; they already know what has to happen. What fans want is to see HOW it happens. They want to see the journey, and right now the journey is crap, and the franchise doesn’t even appear to know what they even want the destination to be.

This Post-Finale setting, while containing some nuggets of gold when taken out of context, are an unplanned, butchered mess that does far more telling than showing, and the telling it does is half-baked and confusing.

“Licensed properties” is an important key word, however. It reveals the reality that Faith Erin Hicks has guard rails put on her, whereas for us fans, our imaginations are the limit and is not constrained by canon, deadlines or the commercial realities of Avatar.

“Licensed properties” also implies the Creators. While we can think of all the great ways a novelist or a competent manga author could create a sweeping epic about both Azula, the Fire Nation and her ultimate place in the Avatar world, the commercial realities of Avatar might just not allow it: Zuko and Aang are the faces of the franchise, followed by Katara. Everyone else are just secondary characters. As a result, Azula becomes a razor thin eggshell painted to look like a person but is not actually a person because the Creators have neither the time nor inclination to turn her into one.

And lastly, “I’m trying my best” is not a very assuring statement. Once again, more evidence that there is no plan or even “faith” in what they are doing. If these authors have to “try” then they don’t know either their market or their product. They’re hoping fans will like what they come up with versus buckling down and actually figuring out how to tell Avatar stories worthy of Avatar’s reputation.

So remember Azula Fans, or Avatar Fans, if Azula Fans are even counted as Avatar fans, your desire to see a competent, well-written, compelling and emotionally-gripping Azula story makes you part of a:

Upset,

Scary,

Aggressive,

CULT.

Well, they certainly got the first one right.

P.S. Don’t harass Faith Erin Hicks. The situation with the comics and Azula are way above her pay grade. At best, we can learn why.