#uma triskelion

[faith-trustpixiedust]

[goforshexgo]

Harry Hook has white boy rizz

[thebluestbluewords]

more murder is good actually

sometimes all my brain needs to write more of Uma’s crew actually murdering their hostage is different music apparently??

*

"I c'n help," Ben slurs. His tongue is going all weird and large. It's like they pulled all the moisture in his mouth out with the gag, and now his tongue is trying to fill the void all on its lonesome. "I can get you off." 

Harry leers. "That's my job, princey. Hands off my captain." 

"Harry." 

He pulls back. "Aww, Uma--" 

"I told you to keep him alive." she says, low and dangerous and slightly blurry to Ben, who is very focused on breathing normally and trying to get spit back into his mouth. If he's going to talk his way out of this situation he needs to be able to actually talk, and not just mumble his words like he's a drunken pirate. 

Although, maybe she'd like that? 

"He's livin'! Breathin' and bleedin' n'all!" Harry cries, spreading his hands wide. 

He's got a hook clenched in one of them, Ben notices. It's sharp. Glistening. Not red and wet like his clothes, so probably not the one they stabbed him with. Do pirates keep a collection of hooks for stabbing, or is it just one per scallywag? He'll look that up later. If he makes it to later. He's gotta focus right now. Pirates. Bleeding. Cotton shoved in his mouth. 

Someone grabs the side of his face and shakes it. "LOOK AT HIM! He's droopier than a rotten potato! He wouldn't be bleeding at all if you hadn't stabbed him!" 

Diplomacy. Negotiations. He's got this. 

What comes out of his mouth instead is much less elegant. "Ow." 

Oops. 

Uma's grip on his cheek switches from shaking to cradling real quick. If Ben were in less pain right now, he might be interested in that. He's still very much gushing blood though, so the little rational part of his brain just files it away for later, when the much larger part that's focused on the ow fuck blood side of things is available again. 

Uma smiles down at him. Her teeth are very white and very, very sharp. She looks like Evie when she smiles, sharp and pretty and dangerous. "Little king! You're awake. How nice." 

"I can help," Ben repeats. His brain is not made of mushy oatmeal, he can do this. "I c'n-- can get you off. The barrier. I have a gate remote." 

Uma lifts a brow. "Do you? Harry?" 

Harry whips out the contents of Ben's pockets with a leering smile, and slaps a dark leather bundle into Uma's awaiting hand. "We didn'a take one off him. Took this though." 

She ruffles through his wallet with efficiency. It shouldn't be hot, but Ben's brain is maybe wired a little wrong, and also he's pretty lightheaded from the blood loss and easy to win over with the easy competence that so many of the kids on the Isle just ooze like water. 

Uma flicks her gaze down to him. "You brought three hundred dollars to the Isle of the Lost." 

"Do you need more?" 

"Do I need--" She laughs. "Do I need more? Money? Here. On the Isle of Leftovers. Do we need more money?" 

She spreads her arms wide, lets her shoulders shake with laughter. It makes the shiny pieces of her jacket dance and sparkle like the shiniest, shittiest disco ball Ben's ever seen. 

He sort of wants to kiss her, but that's probably the blood loss speaking. 

The crew joins her in laughing. There's more of them than Ben can see, but they're there, laughing right along with their captain, melting out of the shadows in a riot of purple and red and black clothes, scrappy and glistening to the teeth with swords and knives. And that's just the ones that Ben can see. 

He can hear one, two bodies moving in the rigging above his head. Laughing. 

It strikes him, belatedly, that he's probably going to die here. 

[idontliketomatoesleavemealone]

Harry: How can you still be single???

Uma: because I don't want a lover, how can YOU still be single?

Harry: BECAUSE YOU DONT WANT A LOVER

[umaudreyau]

the potential dynamic between uma and audrey is super interesting to me.

imagine uma and audrey are assigned roommates after d3. uma is incredibly busy helping with everyone's transition from the isle, and audrey is recovering from her possession by the scepter and trying to rebuild her reputation. but at the end of the day, they're in their shared room. most often ignoring each other.

they've both got their own opinions of each other - none of them are particularly good. audrey has heard all about uma, and honestly? she's kind of terrified of her.

uma is pretty sure audrey's just another spoiled princess.

but it turns out that rooming with someone teaches you a lot more than you may think.

it teaches uma that audrey smokes, and that she knows how to hide it. it teaches uma that audrey's mother is out of the picture, but her overbearing and, quite frankly, evil grandmother is not. uma learns that audrey is actually really funny.

audrey learns that uma sneaks out a lot. she learns that uma does not trust her, or anyone, for that matter. she learns that uma is really pretty, especially when she’s just come back from the beach and still smells like the ocean.

they learn that they’re both a lot different than they thought. they learn that they enjoy each other’s company.

audrey learns that uma didn’t grow up watching movies on the isle, so she catches her up on all of the “must watch” movies.

uma learns that being a princess is way more painfully boring than she initially thought and that she’s glad she has (almost) no part in it.

uma teaches audrey to sword fight.

audrey teaches uma that acts of kindness don’t always come with strings attached.

they see each other as safe people, as equals, as friends.

[dizzydizney]

Gil: There are some things I can just smell. It's like a sixth sense Uma: No, actually, that would be one of the five

[tiredflowercrown]

So I don't know if anyone knows this already or wants to know. Buuuuuuuut

Pirate Postions Explained

Using the pirate crews as my examples

Captain:

When most people think of pirates, they think of a Captain and a First Mate. The captain however isn't an automatic position, it's an elected one; with the only time they have absolute power being in combat or chasing someone. Any other time they could be overruled by a majority vote.

In terms of the Isle, this means both Harriet and Uma were put into power by those around them who have no reason to remove them from said seat. Uma because all of her crew would die for her in a heartbeat. Harriet because despite all her anger and problems, she's good at what she does. (and no one wants to put up with the amount of bs that she does)

First Mate:

First Mates typically didn't exist on pirate ships, instead being a term for navy or commercial ships as the captain's apprentice or right hand. Pirate ships had a quartermaster instead fill that position.

However, Captain James Hook started as a navel officer not a pirate, so his ships had a bit more in common with structuring with navy than other pirate ships. His children followed his lead with how they set up their respective crews. Harriet making Sammy her right hand. Harry making himself Uma's.

Quartermaster:

The quartermaster, in the absence of a first mate, is the next highest ranked position. Often being the one that pirates went to with problems, disagreements, or requests. When not in combat, they held the exact same authority as the captain. As the name suggests, they were in charge of making sure everyone's living quarters was figured out as well as managing food and water supplies.

Harriet, having known him her whole life and trusting his abilities, chose Big Murph as her quartermaster to use both him and Sammy to even out her temperament. Uma went with the most stable and friendly person on the crew, Gil, who everyone agrees was needed to be objective in terms of Harry and other issues.

Master Gunner:

The master gunner is a bit what it sounds like, they are the person in charge of cannons and overall combat if the captain is unavailable for that specific task.

Harriet chose Jade for her quick and out of the box thinking, she can quickly spot a weak point in order to disable a ship. Uma chose Ivy because one way or another, Ivy was going to be using the cannons; might as well teach her and let her be in charge of them.

Medic/Surgeons:

A pirate ship typically didn't have a trained medical practitioner at all. If they did have one, it was because they pressed them into service.

The Isle, however, doesn't have any trained medics. Everyone is just figuring it out from discarded books, stories, and practical experience. Harriet chose Mayra due to her force of will and cool head when it came to people being hurt. Uma chose Bonny because she was the daughter of the Jolly Roger's surgeon, and had a semblance of medical training in that aspect.

Boatswain:

Boatswain are junior officers who reported back directly to either the captain or quartermaster. They made sure the ship was in top shape, keeping track of any damage, making sure the deck is being swabbed, and other small but necessary tasks. They also were the one who would typically lead parties ashore to restock or find materials for repairs.

Harriet chose Diego to keep him close to her because he is very good at keeping track of multiple projects and activities all at once. Uma chose Desiree because of her attention to detail.

Cook/General Positions:

A cook was typically just a random crew member who had been put in charge, this along with other general positions would have been decided by one's talents or other skills.

Harry Badun was chosen via straws for the position of cook, he hasn't done a bad job so why remove him. Claudine was chosen due to her both working in her father's shop and consistently being the only cook in that house. Desiree fills in as cook when Claudine is incapacitated (or banned.)

Hope you might have learned something!

[shellyseashell]

interesting to note that on pirate ships, first mates didn’t always exist. instead, they had quartermasters, which is basically the same rank. anyway, i’ve been headcanoning gil as quartermaster of the lost revenge, and i think it’s be funny for harry and gil to have the same amount of power. they get into five fights daily over decisions before uma reminds them either 1) that she’s captain and she’ll make the decision or 2) pirate vote on things. they have not held a vote.

[izzymybeloved]

Descendants AU idea

Descendants AU where Evie and Uma makes potions like their moms and they become alchemist buddies

[descendantsafterdark]

No Satisfaction

❗minors dni❗

Relationship: Evie x Harry x Uma (also includes glimpses of Evie x Harry, Harry x Uma, & Evie x Uma)

Word count: 7194

Rating: Explicit

Summary: Tired of her usual routine, an unsatisfied princess is looking for a little fun. And she knows the perfect pirates for the job.

Warnings: The story contains mentions of an underage Evie having non consensual sexual relations with older men, but it’s not explicit. The main meat of the story is cnc - a consensual nonconsensual scenario. Evie gave her consent to everything with Uma and Harry beforehand, and there are hints to that in the story, but everyone’s words and actions read like a forced scenario. There is also a considerable amount of slut shaming, manhandling, and tentacles, as well as spanking, slapping, hair pulling, biting, and more

[read on ao3 (or see a full list of warning tags)]

Evie sat at her vanity, focused intently on her reflection as she did her hair and makeup. The Isle's premier princess had a date tonight. One that she actually wanted to participate in.

Evie’s reputation seemed to reach every last corner of the Isle. Flirt. Heartbreaker. Tease. Slut. She’d heard it all before. And the funny thing was, she wasn’t even responsible for any of it.

Well, not for most of it.

It was her mother, the Evil Queen, that laid a hand in all of Evie’s relationships.

See, without their magic, even the biggest, baddest villains were left scrambling for some kind of leverage on their desolate little island. Any way to cling to power and have something over the rest of the villains. A way to collect as many so called allies as possible.

The Evil Queen had Evie. Arguably, her most valuable possession.

Ever since Evie was little, her mother had hammered it into her that her value only existed so long as a man wanted her. She was nothing more than decoration - a beautiful painting to sit in the parlor, or an expensive watch worn on a man’s arm. Her worth was her face, her hair, her body.

When she was a little older, her mother added “sex” to that list. She told Evie all sorts of stories - graphic things that disgusted Evie to her very core at the time - about how to pleasure men. How it was just another tool for her to use. Just another means to an end. 

Another way for her mother to hold onto her power.

Evie’s body for whatever she wanted. From something big like protection or more territory, to stupid little things like the new shipment of makeup that someone else managed to snatch from the barges first. Most of the time, Evie didn’t know what she was being used for until after the fact.

But it wasn’t completely lawless, when she was sent to sleep with someone. There were rules. Set by her mother, of course. Rules in place for her protection, she was told. 

No scratching, spanking, slapping, or hair pulling. Nothing that would cause even temporary damage. And certainly nothing that would bruise or scar. When EQ saw a bright red handprint on Evie’s arm after a visit with Sykes, she poisoned one of his dobermans.

Vanilla only, was another rule. Something about not spoiling her for her future prince. It was good, EQ said, to have experience in bed so Evie would know how to keep her future husband happy. But the Auradon boys were soft. Innocent. They scared too easily. She was sure Prince Philip was still traumatized from his brief time chained up in her dungeon. She didn’t want Evie learning anything that might frighten off a potential suitor. And nothing that would make them see her as a common harlot rather than the pristine princess she was, either. So she made sure her business partners stuck only to the basics.

And they all knew what would happen if they disobeyed. Evie had no qualms about telling her mother when one of them crossed a line. She’d even lied about it on occasion, which led to her mother lashing out and punishing them for something they didn’t do. It made everyone more afraid of the Evil Queen, and more likely to be careful with Evie when she came to trade.

At first, these transactions disgusted Evie. She couldn’t believe her own mother would send her out to strangers like this. But then, after thinking about it for all of ten seconds… Yes, she could totally believe it. 

The horror upon hearing of her new fate quickly turned into disgust when it was time for her first encounter. Jafar. Apparently a ring containing rubies from the dwarfs’ mine made its way onto a barge, and every petty criminal on the Isle was dying to get their grubby little hands on it. But Jay managed to nick it for his dad’s shop first, and the Evil Queen was quick to send out Evie for a trade deal.

Jafar kept her for three days before he decided they were even, and sent her home with the ring. She couldn’t look at Jay for weeks after.

That’s how it was, for a long time. Evil Queen wanted something, sent Evie out, and didn’t utter so much as a thank you when she returned. 

But as disgusted as Evie was when it started, the routine eventually caused nothing but boredom for her. And why shouldn’t it? These were mostly old men, who seemed like they’d never fucked a woman before in their lives. Or maybe they were just out of practice. But even the ones she saw often were always awkward, fumbling, and usually done within minutes. She had to do all the technical work. 

Including taking care of her own pleasure. Something she knew was the furthest thing from these men’s minds while they were screwing. If she closed her eyes and really concentrated, she could pretend she was with someone else. Someone that was at least closer to her own age, and that she found attractive. Someone that smelled a little better.

Her mind always ended up wandering to the ones she was most often warned to stay away from. Like Mal. Evie wondered if she had any hidden dragon strength to match that temper of hers. Or Jay. Evie wouldn’t mind being held captive in those arms. Then there was Harry Hook… He knew his way around a pirate ship, so he was obviously good with ropes. And oh, Uma… Evie knew tentacles ran in the family, and was always curious to know how those might fare in the bedroom.

She’d let herself get lost in one of these fantasies, and she could make herself come no matter who was inside her.

But tonight, she wouldn’t have to rely on fantasies. Tonight, she had a plan. For once in her life, she was taking control of her own pleasure.

By relinquishing that control to two people that she knew could handle it.

Evie was tired of vanilla. Tired of awkward. Tired of only fooling around for the benefit of other people. And tired of doing all the work.

She wanted to experience a real fucking for once in her life. With people who knew exactly what the fuck they were doing. And people that she actually found attractive. She wanted to be taken care of.

Hell, she wanted marks to show off after. Raw, rough, brutal, real - she craved it all. Something to show she wasn’t the precious little porcelain doll everyone else made her out to be.

Besides, she already had a reputation as a slut. Might as well get something out of that, right?

And she had the perfect people picked out to give that to her. No, not anyone from her group. She knew they wouldn’t understand where she was coming from with this request. And even if they did, they would be too hesitant to actually give Evie what she needed, for fear of really hurting her. So she had to look elsewhere.

To a certain pirate captain and her first mate. They were just as feral as they were gorgeous, and seemed the perfect duo for Evie’s release. It took some convincing. Harry demanded to know what was in it for them - Evie’s answer? Sex with her, obviously. What else could they want? Uma was more cautious. Shrewd. She wanted to make sure it wasn’t just some trick to give Mal’s gang a reason to attack her crew. But both groups had been enjoying this temporary ceasefire, and Evie reassured them that she didn’t want to do anything to ruin that, for her sake as much as anyone else’s. 

Eventually, they came to an agreement, and the night was planned out. Evie had already done her dirty prep work. She put the other skills she’d learned from her mother to good use, and brewed up a sleeping draught to slip into her wine at dinner.

Getting up from her vanity, Evie crossed her room to the door and poked her head out into the hallway.

“Mooom?” she called as loudly as she could. No response. “Mom, I’m about to go to bed without washing my makeup off first!” she cried down the hall. Still nothing. If that didn’t rouse her mother up to come lecture her about proper skin care, then she must really be out. Still, it was a large castle. Evie knew her mother probably couldn’t hear her from her room on a normal night. So she walked out into the hall, creeping tentatively closer to her mother’s chambers. 

She screamed at the top of her lungs. Then waited. And waited. And waited. Even still, nothing.

Satisfied with her work, Evie hurried back to her own bedroom and pushed her door to, leaving a small crack so it would be easier to open later. She was confident there would be no interruptions tonight. She and her “friends” could get as loud as they wanted.

She sat back down at her mirror, putting the finishing touches on her look. She wore her hair down, loosely curled but combed out, and no braids in sight. And her face was adorned with plenty of makeup. Heavy focus on the eyes, and her red lips.

On her body, she wore nothing but a thin midnight blue nightie and matching panties. She could imagine how lovely they’d looked when they were new. But now they sported several holes, and the lace was tearing away. But that was perfect for tonight. Harry had told her to wear something she wouldn’t be upset about getting torn. 

Evie felt a shiver run down her spine as she remembered that part of the conversation. Her mind raced as she thought about what that meant. There were so many options, and each one got her more excited than the last. But she was getting ahead of herself, and her guests would be here soon. She had to be ready.

She finished her makeup and rushed over to her bed, turning on the lamp on the nightstand for a little extra light, and laid down on top of the covers. Settling down on her back, making sure her hair was fanned out elegantly on the pillows behind her, and gently tugging the nightie down as though trying to protect her modesty. She folded her hands together over her stomach and closed her eyes.

Her heart hammered in her chest, anticipation already making her excited for what was to come. All she had to do now was wait. 

Fortunately, she wasn’t waiting for long.

Only a few minutes later, her ears picked up on the sound of boots scuffling across the stone floor of the hallway. Inching closer, ever so closer, until…

The door creaked, then slowly swung open. She kept her eyes shut, but could feel the presence of other people in the room. She heard the door shut again, and the lock latch into place, before the footsteps approached her bed.

“Well, well, what do we have here, Harry?” Evie heard Uma ask in a hushed tone.

“Mm, a wee princess that’s all ours for the taking,” Harry responded. Evie could just hear the desire dripping in his voice, and she knew he was as excited for this as she was. Another shiver of anticipation ran through her body, and she wondered if the other two noticed.

“Harry, give her a wakeup call. I bet she’ll be real happy to see us,” Uma said, still keeping her voice low.

“My pleasure, captain…”

Evie’s eyes flew open as Harry’s hand covered her mouth. The bed dipped beside her and before she knew it, Harry Hook was straddling her, his legs bracketing her body and keeping her in place. His other hand shot out to grab her wrists when she started squirming underneath him. 

“Hiya, princess,” Harry greeted cheerfully, baring his teeth at Evie in the way that Evie was sure was supposed to be a grin. She stared up into Harry’s icy, black rimmed eyes with a wide, frantic gaze of her own. She kicked her legs uselessly, twisting back and forth on the bed like she was trying to buck Harry off.

“Better settle down there, princess,” Uma said, coming around to the other side of the bed, her gaze fixed steadily on Evie���s face. “Might make Harry think you don’t like him… You don’t wanna hurt his feelings, do you?”

Evie tried to respond, only for her words to come out muffled against Harry’s palm.

“Sorry, lass, what was that?” Harry asked, removing his hand from Evie’s mouth.

“Help!” Evie cried out, thrashing underneath Harry to no avail. “Someone, please, help-” Harry covered her mouth again. 

“Aww, captain, I don’t think she wants to play with us,” Harry said, looking over at Uma with a pout on his face.

Uma just laughed - cold and unamused. “I don’t think she has a choice…” she replied, kneeling beside Evie and Harry, and looking down to meet the blue haired girl’s eyes. “Look at me, princess, so I know you’re hearing me…” Evie’s eyes darted between Uma and Harry before settling on Uma. “Good girl… Now, Harry is going to take his hand away again. And you’re not going to scream. Because if you scream, you’re getting the hook. And you’re going to wish it was just our hands on you. Is that clear?”

Evie nodded her head.

Uma smiled.

“Good girl,” she said again. Uma looked at Harry, nodded, and Harry drew his hand back. 

“Why are you doing this?” Evie asked, her voice small as she looked up at Uma with wet, tear filled eyes. “If - if this is because of Mal, then-”

Uma cut her off with another laugh, rolling her eyes at the mention of Mal. “It’s not always all about your precious little leader, you know?” she sneered. 

“Then - then what?” Evie asked desperately. “Gold? Jewels? Potions? Whatever you want, I can give you, I just-” She tried her best to sit up underneath Harry, but his free hand caught her shoulder and forced her back down to the mattress, pinning her there. 

“You really don’t get it, do you?” Uma asked. 

“We’re not interested in money or magic, princess…” Harry replied, leaning down closer to Evie. Evie turned her head all the way to the side to avoid being face to face with the crazed pirate. “Not when you’re the shiniest bit of treasure on this miserable rock…” He darted his tongue out and licked a stripe along Evie’s neck, causing her to squeal and try to push him off again.

Harry didn’t slip, just repositioned himself so his legs were pinning Evie’s down, and forced her arms up, pinning her hands to the bed above her head. Leaving her stretched out and exposed underneath him.

“We want you, princess,” Uma said. She reached a hand out, and Evie gasped as it came in contact with one of her breasts. Even through the thin fabric, Uma’s touch felt electric. “And we’re going to have you…” She squeezed, and Evie bit back a moan. “Any way we fucking want you.” She pinched Evie’s nipple harshly between her thumb and forefinger, and Evie couldn’t hold back her cry of pleasure this time. “And by the time we’re done with you, you aren’t going to want to be with anyone else ever again…”

“And you’ll be begging us for more, princess,” Harry grinned, rocking his hips down to grind against Evie. “Mm, you’ve already got me at half mast, and we haven’t even had any real fun yet…”

“Harry, up,” Uma ordered. “I’ve got her.”

Harry frowned, but was quick to follow his captain’s orders. He released Evie’s arms and climbed off of her, standing to the side of the bed to await further instructions.

With her newfound freedom, Evie tried to seize the opportunity to escape. She scurried down towards the foot of the bed since there were no pirates in that direction, wondering how far she could get before she was stopped.

Not far.

She didn’t even get off the bed before something was yanking her back in. Not hands, either. Something cold, and wet, slithered their way around her arms and forced them behind her back.

“Aw, where do you think you’re going, princess?” Uma cooed, coming up behind Evie on the bed. Evie craned her head back to look at Uma, only to see four tentacles protruding from around Uma’s waist. Two of which ended encircled around her wrists. “Now you can play with Harry all you want. He knows his own strength, and knows how to follow orders. But I’m still getting the hang of these babies. Sometimes it’s like they have a mind of their own. I’d hate for you to struggle too much and get yourself hurt. But you won’t let that happen, will you?”

“You two are fucking sick…” Evie whispered, glaring back at Uma. 

“You knew that already, didn’t you, lass?” Harry laughed.

Uma pushed Evie forward, and she had to quickly swing a leg out in front of herself to step onto the floor and not just faceplant off the edge of the bed. Her arms were folded together behind her back, Uma’s tentacles wrapped tightly around them. Then they were tugging downward, and Evie was forced onto her knees on the floor in front of the pirate.

“Now this is a pretty sight, to be sure…” Harry purred, reaching out towards Evie. She flinched away, but all he did was brush the backs of his fingers over her blush pink cheek. “Don’t be so jumpy, princess… You’re in good hands. We’re gonna take care of you. Promise. But I’ve just been dying to have those ruby red lips wrapped around my cock…” 

Evie couldn’t help herself. She glanced back towards Harry’s crotch when she heard him unzip. Her eyes went wide when he pulled his cock out. Even half hard, he looked bigger than any of the old men Evie had been with before. She wondered what she was in store for once he was fully erect.

“Like what you see?” Harry asked with a smirk, languidly stroking himself as he looked down at Evie.

Evie didn’t respond.

Harry stroked his fingers over Evie’s cheek again, then pressed two of his fingertips against her bottom lip. When she didn’t open up automatically, Harry forced his fingers into her mouth.

Evie decided to have a little fun of her own. She held her mouth open for a few seconds before nipping sharply at Harry’s fingers, causing him to shriek in surprise and yank them back out.

“Why you fucking brat!” he growled, drawing his hand back and bringing it down sharply across Evie’s cheek. Her head snapped to the side, before Uma grabbed a fist full of her hair and yanked her head back, forcing her to look up at Harry, who now stood looming over her, hook in hand. He brought the hook up to her face, letting the tip just barely press against her pouty bottom lip. She felt Uma lean in closer, and her hand come up to grab her chin.

“We’re trying to be patient with you, princess…” Uma said, her face right beside Evie’s. “But you only get so many chances. You try to take a bite of either of us again, and the only thing you’re gonna be sucking on is that hook. Is that what you want?”

Evie shook her head as best as she could in Uma’s tight hold.

“Didn’t think so.” Uma released Evie, sitting back on the edge of the bed where she’d been. “She won’t give you any more trouble, Harry.”

Harry nodded his head, setting his hook back on the nightstand. He grabbed his cock again, stroking himself as he moved closer to Evie. Evie tried to lean back, but he grabbed her by the hair and kept her in place.

He stilled his hand on his shaft, positioning himself right in front of Evie’s lips. Again, she didn’t open, so he pressed the head of his cock firmly against her lips.

“Come on, princess, you know the deal…” he murmured. “My cock or my hook. What’ll it be?”

Evie looked up, locking eyes with Harry before slowly parting her lips for him.

“Good choice…” Harry replied with a satisfied grin. He kept his grip firm in Evie’s hair, guiding her down around his cock and moaning as she took more of him in.

Evie let Harry guide her movements, keeping her throat relaxed and breathing through her nose as Harry filled her mouth. She never had a problem with this before, but no guy she’d been with before could compete with Harry. It was more than she was used to, but she still did her best to take it all. Until there were only a couple inches left to go, and her gag reflex got the better of her.

Evie sputtered on Harry’s cock, her body convulsing as she gagged around him. She was pulled back by Uma’s tentacles, giving her a break and letting her catch her breath.

“More than you’re used to, princess?” Uma asked. “Not surprised… Harry’s pretty well endowed, huh?”

“Too big…” Evie whispered, licking her lips as she looked up at Harry.

“Aw, you’re making me blush,” Harry laughed, stroking his fingers through Evie’s hair and pulling her back in. “You just need a little practice, princess. And we plan on giving you that.”

Evie took in a deep breath, then parted her lips again. 

“See? You’re already learning…” Uma smiled. She reached past Evie to point out the red smear of lipstick on Harry’s cock. “That’s your personal best so far, princess. That’s what you need to get past to make Harry happy. Think you can do that?”

Evie nodded her head. As soon as Uma dropped her hand, Evie was back on Harry’s cock, taking him down as far as she did before, and still gagging when she reached that same spot.

“Whoa there, lass, don’t make yourself throw up now…” Harry said, taking a small step back. He held Evie’s head in place and started to fuck her mouth instead. Shallow thrusts, only a few inches in and out at a time. And sinking in a little more with every forward thrust, until they reached the same spot. Evie tensed up, expecting to gag again, but Harry slid in another half inch without a problem. She was sure she could take the whole thing now, but Harry pulled his hips back. 

Evie let out a muffled whine, shuffling forward on her knees, desperate to keep him inside. Harry and Uma both laughed.

“I think she wants more, Harry…” Uma mused. “Stay where you are. Let her do the work.” 

Evie steadied herself, taking a deep breath in through her nose before starting to bob her head on Harry’s cock again. Going at a faster pace than Harry had been, determined to do what the two pirates asked of her. As she sank down closer to the base of Harry’s cock, she felt something on the back of her head. Uma’s hand? No, Uma’s boot. Evie moaned around Harry’s length, causing him to make a similar noise in response. 

“That’s it, girlie…” Harry whispered, watching with rapt fascination as Uma pushed Evie in further. Until her lips reached the base of Harry’s shaft, and her nose pressed against his lower abdomen. Evie didn’t gag this time, keeping her composure. And feeling rather proud of herself for swallowing down her biggest cock yet.

She thought they would let her go now, but neither pirate pulled back. And when Harry did move, it was to reach up and pinch her nose shut, cutting off her one source of oxygen at the moment. Evie stared up at Harry with wide eyes, but tried her best to stay calm.

But even as Evie’s lungs started to ache for air, Harry didn’t let up. She tried her best to pull back from his cock, just to be stopped by Uma’s firm hold. She squirmed between the two of them, her face turning red as real tears streamed down her face.

Just as Evie started to see stars and feel her head swimming, she was released. She fell back against Uma, gulping in as big a breath as she could manage. A thick rope of drool fell from the corner of her mouth, dripping down to her chest.

“You didn’t think we were gonna go easy on you, did you?” Uma asked. She reached around Evie, running her hand through the mess of saliva on her body and bringing it up to smear over her face, smudging her lipstick and eye makeup even more. “Not so pretty now, are you, princess?” 

Evie didn’t respond, but cried out as Uma yanked her hair to make her look up at Harry again. Harry rested a hand atop her head, holding her steady as he jerked himself to completion. He came with a low, guttural moan, spilling out over Evie’s face. She parted her lips for him again, but barely any of his seed made it into her mouth. He seemed to be trying his best to get it over as much of her face as possible.

When Harry finished, Uma reached up to run her fingers through the mess on Evie’s cheek, then held it up to her mouth so she could lick them clean. Evie easily obliged, humming at the taste of Harry on her tongue. 

“How’s he taste, princess?” Uma asked. She pulled her tentacles back, leaving Evie on the floor.

“Salty…” Evie whispered, turning to look up at the pirate queen.

Uma laughed at that, leaning down over Evie so their faces were only inches apart. “Mind if I see for myself?” Without waiting for a response, she darted her tongue out and licked over Evie’s other cheek. Lapping up whatever she could of the mess Harry left, leaving a few kisses here and there as well. When she arrived at Evie’s lips, she kissed her hungrily and let her tongue delve deep into her mouth, sharing the taste of Harry between them before Uma pulled back.

“Harry, get her back on the bed,” Uma instructed. Harry leaned down and easily scooped Evie up in his arms, laying her back on the bed as Uma scooted back to give them room.

Evie let out a soft breath when her back hit the mattress, letting her eyes slip shut.

“You’re not trying to tap out now, are you, princess?” Uma asked, settling down next to her. “You think Harry is the only one that gets to come tonight?”

“Uma, please…” Evie rasped, blinking her eyes open to look at the pirate next to her. “You’ve made your point… You can tell everyone you conquered the princess. You can even throw it in Mal’s face if you want. Just, please, leave me be now…”

“You’re wasting your breath, lassie,” Harry chuckled, laying on Evie’s other side and essentially trapping her in the middle. “Once Uma’s set her mind on something, she won’t stop til she gets what she wants. She’s real hard headed that way.”

“Watch it,” Uma warned, fixing Harry with a pointed gaze before turning her attention back to Evie. “We aren’t monsters, you know?” She lazily ran the tip of her index finger up along Evie’s thigh, skipping over her underwear and drawing it up over her tight abdomen, pulling her nightie up with it. “We plan on playing fair here. You do something for us, we do something for you…”

Evie could feel goosebumps rising on her skin at Uma’s delicate touch, and the sound of her voice right in her ear. She did her best to push down any feelings of pleasure she had at the moment, focused on playing her role for the two pirates. She turned to Uma, narrowing her eyes in the best glare she could manage. “I don’t want anything from you,” she spat.

Uma’s expression hardened. She climbed on top of Evie, grabbing at the hem of her nightie in both hands and yanking hard, causing it to rip right up the middle. Another sharp pull and the worn fabric came apart at the top, exposing Evie’s breasts.

Evie squealed, quickly reaching up to cover herself.

“Getting shy, princess?” Uma asked, arching a brow at Evie. “That’s not like you.”

“Nah, we see the way you parade around the Isle like you own the place…” Harry whispered, leaning closer and kissing Evie’s neck. “Twirling around in those short skirts, showing off in those high heels…” He bit down rough on her earlobe, making Evie squeak. “Practically begging for some poor depraved soul to drag you into the nearest alleyway and have their way with you.”

“And then we come along, bringing the fun to you, and you wanna say no?” Uma asked. “You don’t wanna show us what you show off to everyone else? Fine. Harry, I bet your hook will pry her hands up without a problem. Just try not to scratch up her tits too much. I wanna keep them pretty.”

“No!” Evie cried, stopping Harry midreach for his hook. She dropped her hands, letting them rest by her sides and exposing herself fully for the pirates.

“Mm, no. Hands up. Hold onto the headboard,” Uma instructed. Evie obeyed, raising her hands up and gripping onto the wrought iron above her.

“There, now, that’s a good lass…” Harry whispered, laying back down beside her.

“Told you we wouldn’t need rope for this, Harry,” Uma said with a smirk towards Evie. “I knew it wouldn’t take much for you to follow orders. You want to be our good girl, don’t you?”

Evie nodded her head. 

“Let me hear you say it.”

“I - I want to be your good girl…” she whispered.

“Does that mean you’re gonna stop fighting us?” Uma asked. Evie nodded again.

Satisfied with her answer, Uma leaned down over Evie’s body, rewarding her with kisses - over her neck, her collarbones, her chest, her breasts. She kissed, nipped, and sucked at every inch of Evie’s skin she could easily reach in this potion, leaving several marks in her wake.

Claiming Evie for her own.

When Uma’s focus shifted to Evie’s nipples, the princess let out a sigh of relief. The drafty castle air had them at full attention, and Evie had been silently begging Uma to give them some love this whole time.

Uma flicked the tip of her tongue over one, and Evie gasped sharply. She repeated the action, reaching her hand up to Evie’s other breast to give it similar attention. Evie writhed beneath her, letting out soft little cries and mewls of pleasure with every action Uma administered. She’d almost completely forgotten about Harry, who was practically drooling as he watched the girls play.

All too quickly, Uma pulled away, and Evie couldn’t help the little whine of disappointment that escaped from her mouth.

“Harry,” was all Uma had to say before her first mate dove in, eagerly fondling and licking Evie’s breasts like he’d been dying to do. He was much more erratic than Uma, not as precise, but it still drove Evie crazy all the same. He suckled hard on one nipple, pinching the other firmly between his fingers. When he finally let up, he immediately sank his teeth in the soft flesh of her breast, starting to suck a mark of his own onto her. 

Evie didn’t even register the fact that he’d stopped groping her other breast, until she realized she could feel his hand creeping down lower and lower on her abdomen. 

Uma noticed as well. A tentacle circled around Harry’s wrist and jerked his hand away. He pulled back from Evie with a groan. “C’mon, captain, please…” he begged, looking at Uma with pleading eyes. “I’m dying to get inside her treasure chest.”

“Settle down, Harry…” Uma warned. “You try to get ahead of me again, and you’ll be pulling up a chair to watch the rest of the show from the sidelines. Got it?”

Harry clenched his jaw, nodded his head.

“Good…” Uma went back to work,  kissing her way down Evie’s body, stopping once she reached her panties. She hooked her fingers in the waistband, sliding them down Evie’s legs. “Fuck, Harry, these are soaked…” she chuckled, handing the tiny garment off to him. “Here. Your souvenir for the night.”

Harry happily took the prize from Uma, raising them up to his nose to smell them before starting to stroke his cock with Evie’s underwear in his hand.

Evie stared in awe at the pirate, wondering if it was all for show or if he was really into her like that. She didn’t have too much time to think though, as she felt Uma’s hands on her legs to spread them open. But, wanting to play their game a little longer, she did her best to keep them closed.

“Aww, baby, I thought we were past this…” Uma said. Faux sweetness dripping from her voice as she spoke. “Your body already gave you away… You’re soaking wet. You’re not just following orders anymore. You want this as bad as we do.”

Uma’s tentacles danced excitedly around her before two of them started circling around Evie’s legs. Slowly working their way up, ensnaring her in their clutches and tightening around her.

Evie cried out when her legs were forced apart. She struggled against them, but the tentacles held tight, preventing her from moving even an inch. She was completely exposed to Uma.

“You just love wriggling like a worm on a hook, don’t you?” Uma asked in an amused tone. “But, like I said…” She brought her hand up to Evie, running her finger through her wetness. She then held her finger out to Harry, letting him suck it clean. “You can’t lie to us, princess. You can’t pretend like you aren’t enjoying this. If you really hated what we were doing, you wouldn’t be this wet, would you?”

“Uma…” Evie couldn’t manage much more than that.

Uma decided to be nice, to stop teasing. 

She plunged her tongue as deep into Evie as she could manage, wanting to taste her. Fucking her on her tongue, listening as Evie cried out with every move she made. She licked over Evie’s folds, working her way up to her clit. Taking a moment to catch her breath before darting her tongue out and flicking over it, causing Evie to arch halfway up off the bed. Uma reached up to pin her hips down, holding her firmly in place as she ate her out. 

“Uma, I - I’m gonna - !” Evie couldn’t even finish her sentence before her orgasm hit. She’d been soaking wet and on edge this whole time, since before Harry and Uma even set foot in her room. Of course she wasn’t going to last long with Uma working her over so expertly. 

Uma eagerly lapped up Evie’s juices as they came flooding out, pulling back when Evie relaxed and going in for another kiss. Letting Evie taste herself on her tongue.

Evie kissed back lazily, a small smile on her face when Uma pulled back.

“Thank you, captain…” she whispered. 

“Mm, captain, huh? That’s nice to hear from you…” Uma smirked. “You’re welcome, princess. I told you we weren’t totally selfish. Every princess deserves to be pampered, doesn’t she?”

Evie nodded her head.

“Good. Because now it’s Harry’s turn to pamper you,” Uma informed her. She shifted to lay by Evie’s left side, while Harry moved down in between her legs.

“What - another? Already?” Evie asked, genuinely surprised by that. 

“Not what you’re used to, huh?” Uma asked. 

Evie shook her head. 

“She told you we were gonna ruin you for anyone else,” Harry said, winking at Evie. He gripped her thighs, his nails biting into the soft flesh as he spread her legs open. He started lapping at her wet cunt, his face buried in the nest of soft blue curls that circled her. Just like with her breasts, Harry’s technique was wild and erratic. And just like before, Evie didn’t care. She still felt on edge despite the fact that she already came moments before. Everything Harry did felt like too much and not enough at the same time.

She was about to beg for more - Harry’s cock, his tongue, Uma’s fingers, just something inside her to make her feel whole. But before she could even form the words, she felt something circling her entrance. Something that didn’t feel like any of the above.

She looked over at Uma, following one of her tentacles to where it disappeared between her legs. She tried to look past Harry, watching as the tentacle seemed to give her a little wave before delving deep into her pussy.

“Fuck!” she screamed, her head falling back against the pillows. She bucked her hips wildly, doing her best to fuck herself on the strange new appendage. She could feel that thing writhing inside of her, moving around and curling in on itself, stretching her out in ways she never could’ve imagined before. Her knuckles turned white as she gripped onto the headboard for dear life.

Harry pulled back just to watch the show, and another tentacle came up to replace his mouth. The more pointed tip traced over her folds, then flicked over her clit, before one of the little suckers attached itself to the sensitive nub and sent a whole new shockwave of pleasure coursing throughout Evie’s body.

“Oh my gods, oh my gods, oh my gods!” Evie shrieked, clenching tight around Uma’s tentacle as her second orgasm hit. 

Uma worked her through it, fucking her pussy and teasing her clit until Evie started to come down. She pulled her tentacles back, and a whole new flood of juices came rushing out of Evie. Harry leaned in to lick up what he could, still desperate for a taste of her.

Evie reached down between her legs, placing a hand on his head and weakly pushing him back. Harry took the hint, licking his lips and leaning over to kiss Uma, sharing Evie’s taste between them.

“Delicious, isn’t she, captain?” Harry asked with a grin. “The most delectable forbidden fruit…”

“Our sweet little poisoned apple,” Uma smirked. She looked back down at Evie, who was laying completely still, limp, and watching them with heavy lidded eyes. “Harry, I think our princess needs a real break. What do you think?”

“Aye, I think so, captain…” he replied, nodding his head.

Both pirates were still fully clothed, but that quickly changed. Uma pulled Harry in close, kissing him hungrily and starting to strip him out of his clothes. Harry did the same for Uma, the two of them easily shedding their various layers until they were left as naked as Evie. 

Evie watched as Harry laid back on the bed and Uma climbed on top of him. She thought Uma was going to ride his cock, but she ended up straddling his face instead. Evie couldn’t tear her eyes away from the pair. Uma looked sexier than Evie had ever seen her, the soft golden lamplight dancing off her body as she rolled her hips down and fucked herself on Harry’s tongue in the way that felt best for her. 

Harry held onto Uma’s thighs like they were his lifeline, letting her use him for her pleasure. Evie looked down, seeing his cock fully erect again and bobbing against his stomach as he moved under Uma. She sat up slowly, crawling down the bed to take Harry’s cock in her hand. Harry moaned into Uma as Evie started to stroke him, and again when she took him in his mouth. 

Uma got herself off twice before dismounting, pulling Evie off of Harry as well. “Glad to see you’re finally embracing your role, princess,” she murmured, laying back against the pillows and pulling Evie on top of her. “But I promised Harry he’d get to come inside that royal cunt before the night was over. You don’t want me to break my promise, do you?”

Evie rapidly shook her head, licking her lips as she looked down at Uma. “But I haven’t gotten to taste you yet, captain…” she whispered.

“You’re a smart lass,” Harry said from behind her. “You can figure it out.” She felt his strong hands gripping her waist, and before she knew it she was being yanked back on the bed and closer to Harry. Putting her face to face with Uma’s soaked pussy. 

Evie didn’t need to be told before diving in, exploring Uma’s grotto with her tongue. Uma’s hand tangled in her hair to hold her in place, letting her know she was doing a good job. She felt Harry move behind her, felt the dull head of his cock tracing over her slick cunt. She had no trouble taking him inside. She was so wet, even his impressive length slid in with ease. 

He fucked her wildly from behind, alternating between scratching down her back and spanking her ass. Both actions caused Evie to clench tight around him, and made her little pussy feel that much more delectable to Harry.

Uma added her own sensation to the mix, letting a tentacle come down to play with Evie’s clit again. It all worked together to drive Evie crazy. She came twice more from their actions, and managed to make Uma come one more time. She felt exhausted, and was sure she wouldn’t even be able to keep her ass in the air if it weren’t for Harry’s firm grip on her hips.

Harry’s own orgasm hit him a few moments later, and he grunted as he emptied himself deep inside of Evie. She whimpered at the sensation of his cock twitching inside her, and when he pulled out, she could feel his cum slowly trickling out and down her leg. 

Harry and Uma pretty much had to manhandle Evie’s pliant body, to help her lay down comfortably on the bed. She didn’t protest - she barely even registered it was happening. Uma laid down beside her, while Harry retrieved a rag from his pants pocket to wipe off Evie’s face, then between her legs. Evie whined as the rough cloth rubbed over her sensitive skin, closing her legs tight when Harry finished and turning to curl up against Uma.

“Stay the night?” she asked quietly, looking up at Uma with pleading eyes.

“Think the crew can survive a night without us?” Harry asked, laying back down on the bed and spooning Evie from behind. 

“Probably not,” Uma replied. “But I can’t say no to our princess.” She reached over to turn out the light, pulling the covers up over the three of them and hugging Evie close. “How do you feel, princess?”

Evie smiled at the question, not used to hearing it after something like this.

“Completely satisfied.”

[leavethemtorot]

The Lost Revenge

Captain: Uma Triskelion

First Mate: Harry Hook

Quartermaster: Gulliver ‘Gil’ LeGume

Master Gunner: Ivy de Vil

Medic: Bronwen ‘Bonny’ Callahan

Main Cook: Claudine Frollo/ Desiree Marinos

Boatswain: Desiree Marinos

Assorted Members: Jonas Marinos, Ethan ‘Gonzo’ Blakeslee, Clement ‘Clay’ Clayton, Maighread ‘Maggie’ Mim

The Lost Revenge is one of two gangs that run the docks and surrounding territory. Unlike other gangs, The Lost Revenge and The Shattered Hope prefer to settle territory and other disputes between themselves, never bringing in any outside gangs.

The Lost Revenge, while rarely challenging themselves, is most often assisting others in territory disputes, especially when the opposing party is the Dragon’s Blood.

The Lost Revenge has a reputation of being one of the most loyal of the gangs, with members rarely leaving on their own accord and willing to defend their captain for any reason.

[dragoneyes618]

My headcanon is that Harriet Hook was the first child born on the Isle of the Lost.

She’s stated as Harry Hook’s older sister. (Rise of the Isle of the Lost.) Now, Harry appears to be the same age as everybody else-Mal, Jay, Uma. So Harriet is older than that. (Unless they’re twins.) Maybe there were other older Isle kids born before Harriet, but that’s never stated. So, Harriet.

If Harriet was the first child born on the Isle, then she was the first citizen of the Isle. I also like to imagine this somehow meaning that she is the rightful leader of the Isle. She was the first one born on it, she inherits it. Sure, Uma seems to be the leader, but Harriet has her own pirate crew, doesn’t she? And don’t forget that Harriet’s brother is Uma’s first mate.

Harriet is satisfied with this. But she holds herself responsible for all the children of the Isle. She was the first one, after all. Everyone knows they can come to her. She and Uma respect each other. (They have to, because otherwise, Harry, whom they both care about have loyalty to, would be torn in two.)

[goforshexgo]

I need someone who's shifted to descendants (specifically the Isle of the lost) to tell us more about the schools (dragon hall, serpent prep, and witch school) I. Need. More. Info. What are the classes ? What are taught in said classes ? Who teaches them ? What are the layout of the schools ? PLEASE I NEED TO KNOW MORE

[thebluestbluewords]

An offer she couldn’t refuse…

I don’t know what’s going on with the new Rise of Red trailer, and at this point I’m too afraid to ask. I’m not too afraid to speculate though!!

+

Uma grinds her boots on the carpet as she walks into Mal's office. It's not muddy enough for her to track much in, but she's still got old blood on her heels, and bloodstains never really come out. 

It's petty. Evil knows it's petty, but after all this time, Uma's pretty sure she deserves a little petty when it comes to the new queen. She's not the one with the ostentatious royal sign on her door, and she's certainly not the one putting kingdom business on hold so she can host the fluffy, stupid wedding of her dreams. 

Not that they're here to talk about that.  

"Princess." 

Mal spins around. "Uma." 

Uma steps closer. There's a desk in between them, but that's not a problem. The little queen is short, just like her wicked mother, and Uma's got practice looming over people taller than her. With Mal's fairy stature, it's not trouble at all for Uma to lift her chin and glare down her former archnemesis. In fact, it's a pleasure. 

Mal drops her gaze first. Hah. 

"Thanks for coming," she says, dropping into her fancy fucking desk chair. "I appreciate it. I know you're busy, what with the pirating and all. It means a lot that you came." 

Uma drops into the other chair that somebody has so conveniently placed on the visitor's side of the desk. "Cut the shit, princess.  You called me here for a reason, and I'm here because I want to know what it is. No more, no less." 

Mal's eyes flicker back up to meet her own. They're bright green. Magical bright green. 

Well, shit. 

"I have an offer for you," the Queen of Auradon says slowly. "Which I think you're uniquely qualified for. You can turn it down if you want, but I'm asking you to hear me out first. Fair?" 

Uma lifts a finger up to tap her mother's necklace where it sits hot against her collarbone. The problem with magical items is that you can't always turn them off. It's not that she wants to take advantage of her mother's ocean magic and use the locket to steal whatever spell Mal's got sitting behind her eyes, but sometimes the magic just slips out, and she ends up absorbing spells that weren't intended for her. 

Sometimes they're even useful. 

"Life ain't fair, princess," Uma drawls. "But sure, I'll hear you out. What'd you got for me?" 

"Headmaster. Of Auradon Prep." 

"No."

Mal's eyes flash. "Hear me out, Uma."

"No way. A school full of royals is never gonna listen to a pirate from the Isle of the Lost. You might as well ask an orge to be headmaster." 

"Good to know you consider yourself on the same level as ogres," Mal snaps. "But you said you'd listen to me. I need someone from the Isle to serve as acting headmistress while Fairy Godmother is on sabbatical, and I want it to be you." 

Uma swings a foot up to grind her boot heel on the chair too. "Why me? Why not Princess Blueberry, or your precious Freddie Facilier?" 

"Freddie's busy. Evie's not available. And they're not the leaders of a pirate crew. They don't have your experience with managing idiots.”

"If you only brought me here to insult my crew, I can leave." Uma offers, jerking a finger over her shoulder towards the door. 

She takes a special satisfaction in making the queen of Auradon grind her teeth. Sure, her ex-girlfriend can just grow her magical dragon teeth out bigger and better than before, but Uma's got to make her use those magic powers. No easy roads out for the princess who grabbed freedom with both hands and left the rest of them behind. 

"Please," Mal grits out. "Uma. I wouldn't be asking you if I had anyone else that I thought could do it, you know this. Auradon Prep is--" 

She cuts herself off. 

Fascinating. 

"Auradon Prep is what?" 

"It's-- look, I can't give you the details unless you want the job." 

Oh, she wants the job.

"I can't accept the job," Uma says carefully, letting each word slip out like a pearl from her mother's oysters, "Until I know what it entails. I have a whole crew relying on me, and I can't just abandon them for just any old headmaster role. I need to know it'll be worth my while." 

The office door clicks shut. 

Uma leans back in her chair as Mal's eyes glow green, greener, and slip closed. 

"Swear that you won't speak of this to anybody outside this room," Mal intones in a voice that is both hers and not her own. "Swear on the ocean." 

Uma scoffs. "I'm not swearing anything. I tell my left hand man everything that I know. It's why we work. Honesty, princess, ever heard of it?" 

Mal's eyes crack open. They're glowing scary green, like the bioluminescent algae that Uma pulls up from the sea floor sometimes when she's bored with waiting for the Southern Isles' trade ships to appear. Sort of a freaky color if you're not ready for it. "You can tell Harry. But that's it, and if he tells anybody else, I get to send my crows after him." 

"Deal." 

Her eyes slip shut again. That voice, the creepy double-edged rasp of magic, creaks out of her throat.  "Then swear it, daughter of Ursula. Swear that what you hear today will not leave this room, except to confer with your second in command." 

Aw, hell. 

"I swear." Uma says, mostly just to get her to shut up. "Swear it on my mother's watery grave." 

"It is done," Mal intones. "Remember your promise, daughter of the sea." 

Uma rolls her eyes. "Yeah, yeah. Give me the deets, Mal." 

Her ex's head flops forward. The light cuts out abruptly from her eyes. It's creepy, but they were born and raised in creep central, so it's not like Uma's freaked out by the frankly gratuitous display of magic bullshittery. 

Her head snaps back up before Uma can think to poke her with one of her knives. "There's a time distortion." 

[idontliketomatoesleavemealone]

Uma, to Mal: for someone who is 70% water you don't look very refreshing.

Gil: BUUUUUURN!!!

Uma: water can't be burned.

Gil: EVAPORATEEEEEE!?!

[umaudreyau]

uma and audrey and elphie and glinda.

i mean come on