#untold thoughts

[loliloquy]

08/06/2025 😔

am sad...it hurts a bit...obv i can handle...i hv seen much worse... its just again now it just makes me think should i just be alone... cuz to her i expect more than i should...i feel emotions more than i should...i get jealous more than i should...i dont know whats she thinking about me, where am i in her life. she does say sweet things to me...but i dont know it feels like its something she would do to anyone not just me. so its not spl anymore. and since shes from all girls skl and clg her friends are against having guy friends...some of her frnds ask her to be careful(thats fine) some say like dont be friends with him just avoid it right now. agent L told me today about another friend saying the same thing "dont have any guy friends". i vaguely said "Aliens"(like outsiders uk). she asked me "who?" i said ur male friends(its just me) shes like yeahh i asked her do you feel the same way? she said maybe... she always said that am her safespace. she can share certain things only to me.(she got like 5+ best friends). she likes to get closer with me. her parents allowed her(which is like super rare in her household)to go abroad for work. but she feel likes idk i cant am indecisive and reason is me... cuz she would like to do alot of things with me...like am the one shes worried abt... alot of other things it felt good...it felt super good that i actually cried... but am an alien(outsider) how does that work tho? how can u feel those with an alien...idk it just hurts... i think theres nthg mutual and am just being delusional..shes just treating me as a typical friend... am so stupid...

she never said anything voluntarily...i tell her things and she be like "yeahh i do too" or "same tbh", or after i yap about how bad i feel she comes and talks few things. she wont even know if am sad or mad... it feels so bad telling her cuz i dont know i am in that place...can i be sad or mad? idk she says i can tho...but i dont know...

i journal only when something happy or sad happens in my life...i hv told her that too... and even now i told her am gonna write blog... she should know...

Love you all guys for reading this...it means a lot.... I can always take a good feedback. Thank you~

[imstilllosing]

letting the people around me

take advantage of the kindness and love

that i have deep inside me,

letting them take pieces of me

every time they needed one.

trying my best to prove everyone

of things i can do,

until my body feels exhausted,

almost giving up

[un-felt]

With each palpitating pulse, numbness reigns

Ground beneath a foreign land, estranged

Blood spills, a tale untold upon the floor

Burns, a scalding sign, life's whispered lore.

[labyrinth-lavie]

Chapitre II

This sorrowful, soft melody grows ever lonelier.

Now, as I listen alone, the memory of you clings to me.

The song we once exchanged, now only echoes in silence.

The first time it played, I felt butterflies in my stomach.

Now, the butterflies have died in my heart.

Music, both a balm and a blade,

When joy fills my heart, I find comfort in the melodies.

But when shadows fall, the lyrics pierce like daggers.

This is the painful torment I find pleasure in,

For it keeps your memory from fading.

There were songs I dedicated to you, bold and raw,

But I embraced them, for they spoke the truth of my heart.

A grin twisted with bitterness,

 As I taste my own blood from the wounds I’ve opened.

Still, I confess, I long to hear this song again and again,

To feel your voice in the words,

Believing that these melodies could bind us once more.

Darling, if you don’t know how to return, Just send me a song.

[mariathea]

Stay lowkey. Not everyone needs to know what's happening in your life. ❤️

[badninken]

Trafalgar Law allegedly spent months on Punk Hazard.

[angelnextdooor]

reading the brothers hawthorne is actually quite funny because one minute it’s just another episode of “keeping up with the graysons” and then the next your reading a scene from that one James Bond movie Casino Royale

[lanterns-and-daydreams]

Reporter, to Libby: So, how does it feel to be marrying someone so out of your league?

Libby: Well-

Nash, cutting her off: Feels amazin', darlin', thanks

[heesvnqie]

>>Gata Only- Lee Heeseung FF

pairing: fem!reader x heeseung

word count: 1.9k+

synopsis: You and Heeseung's patrolling session at Hogwarts dungeons turns into a makeout session.

genre: smut, hogwarts au

warnings: >> smut,cussing, biting/marking, fingering, begging, choking, slight hair pulling, size kink, dom!heeseung x sub!reader, unprotected sex (a big NO-NO), edging, slight overstimulation, creampie, manhandling. petnames

Song playing: Gata Only by FloyyMenor and Cris MJ

Notes: My two absolute favourite things together!

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

As you walked through the cold corridors of Hogwarts, a shiver ran down your spine. You were running late for patrolling.

One male and one female student were chosen from each house in their fifth year to act as prefects. They would continue to be prefects in their sixth and seventh years until they left school.

From Gryffindor, you were chosen as the female prefect. But compared to the male prefect, you were nothing.

The male prefect was none other than, THE Lee Heeseung. He was a ace, a perfectionist, most popular boy of Hogwarts. Starting from juniors to seniors, 99% of them knew him. He was a pureblood, a son from one of the well-known families of the wizarding world.

While on the other hand, you were not from a pure blood family. Though you had great academics and also were a perfectionist but not even close to Lee Heeseung's level.

This evening, just before you left for patrolling, you had been called out by Professor McGonagall. She complimented you on your being the prefect for the hundredth time since you had got the position and presented a long speech on how the position should not change your attitude and how you should not consider yourself above others.

So, now you found yourself walking towards the dungeons. Your area of patrolling was usually near the Great Hall. But Snape had asked you and Heeseung to patrol near the dungeons rather than the Great Hall.

You reached the dungeons as you fixed your skirt and made sure that the shirt was tucked in properly. You fixed the cloak as you held your chin high as you walked down the stairs into the dungeons.

It was dark as the dungeons glowed dark green. The Slytherins Common Room was located in the dungeons afterall.

As you walked a few steps into the dungeon, you felt a presence behind you as you sharply turned back.

There stood Lee Heeseung, face inches away from yours. His eyes glinted in the green glow as he smirked.

Your breath hitched as he walked a few steps closer, his body towering over yours.

You had a damn crush. A crush on the boy that stood now infront of you.

Who didn't have a crush on him afterall?

He was all that a girl would want in a man.

This is was surprisingly your third interaction with him. The first one happened during first year on the Hogwarts Express, when you both shared the same train cabin. The second was during the third year, when Snape had paired you two for making Amortentia.

He chuckled as he felt your breath hitch.

"Remember me?" He asked as it caused you to scoff. You pushed him off you as you walked ahead, shouting back,"Who doesn't. The question should be asked by me if you remember me?"

He laughed at your reply as he ran up to you, walking beside you, matching your speed.

"Cute." He muttered under his breath quietly.

"Well, why wouldn't I remember you? Kim Y/N." Hearing your name from him was like heaven. Your composure was threatening to crumble down.

You stayed quiet. You never expected him to remember the name of a person like you who was just a nobody at school.

"Hey why quiet?" He whined as he suddenely stopped in front of you.

You looked up at him with a sign of vulnerability in your eyes.

"Everyone says that we have a spark." He said as your eyes widened and your mouth opened but no sound came out.

Your mind shoots back to the memory to first year when you and Heeseung had shared the same train cabin. You two had had the best time on the Hogwarts Express as you had chatted for hours and laughed away. The other two students who also shared the train cabin had spoke up and pointed out that you two had a spark among yourselves. You two had looked at each other as you both had coughed awkwardly as the train had come to an halt at Hogwarts and you two had scuttled away from each other.

But why was he bringing it up now?

"W-who said that?' You stuttered out.

"Everyone does. I know that you consider yourself as a nobody but that's not correct. You're very popular among the boys." He said with a smile.

"Really?" You were in utter disbelief.

He nods as he steps close as he whispers into your ear, hot breath flowing down,"And I know everything about you."

You look at him bewildered.

"What do you think? My attention is always on you." He said with a chuckle as he held your shoulders and turned you around. Your back now faced him.

"Let's continue patrolling!" He announced happily as he pushed you a bit to start you walking.

You two walked around the dungeons and realised that the dungeons were a HUGE place.

As you two walked towards a isolated place which glowed more green than the other areas, Heeseung pinned you to the wall.

Your breath stuck in your throat, you stuttered out,"W-what are you doing Hee?"

He looked deep into your eyes.

"You know what?" He asked."I cannot hide it anymore."

"I like you."

Those three words made butterflies erupt into your stomach.

"Really?" You ask.

He nods.

"Through all those fangirls and other playgirls, I waited for you. Only you."

You two stand looking deep into each other's eyes as he breaks the silence.

He speaks up with a bit of hesitance. "What about you? Do you feel anything towards me?"

You chuckle at his straightforward behaviour.

"Yes." You hiss out. He chuckles happy as he jumps around the dungeon.

He opens his arms as you accept the hug happily.

"I am the happiest man on earth." He says then he goes quiet as you see a smirk grow on his face.

"Well, well." He takes small steps towards you as you back away till your back hits the cold dungeon wall.

"We're all alone you see." He points out as he continues,"And it's late so nobody will pass through this part of the dungeon."

"S-so?" You ask as he walks close as you feel his warm breath flow on your face.

"I am no playboy, Kim Y/N. " He says as you feel his hand wraps around your waist.

"And right now I want to fuck you." He presses his body on yours and groans as he whispers in your ear. "And now the thing that is left is your permission to allow me to."

You hesitate but soon feel him whisper,"I have waited too long. I can't control it."

He licks your earlobe as he nibbles on it, making your knees go weak and panties damp.

"Heeseung." You breath out his name. He hums while he places wet kisses down your neck.

"Fuck me."

And that were the only two words that Heeseung ever wanted to hear in his life from your mouth.

Heeseung pulls you into his arms, his lips crashing against yours in a heated and intimate kiss. His hands roam your body with a sense of urgency, leaving a trail of fire everywhere he touches. You respond eagerly, wrapping your hands over his shoulder.

Every touch sparks into flames, as you two forget about your surroundings.

Heeseung groans against your mouth, pressing his body on yours as he rubs his clothed cock on you.

"Oh god. You drive me crazy, you know that? he whispers, his voice thick with desire.

His hands move with confidence and purpose, knowing exactly how to drive you wild. "I can't get enough of this." Heeseung murmurs, his lips trailing down your neck.

Heeseung’s kisses move lower, his lips and tongue exploring every inch of your skin, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. His hands are everywhere, caressing, teasing, and worshipping your body.

He slips your panties down and slides a hand over your pussy which makes you gasp. You tilt your head back and he makes rounded movements on your clit.

Suddenly he flattens his tongue over you, licking a long line from your entrance to your clit. You cry out again, feeling lightheaded as your hands squeeze into fists. He slides 2 fingers into your slick opening, and you know it won't be long before you're coming.

"Feel good?", he murmurs, his voice a low, seductive growl. His eyes lock onto yours, the intensity in his gaze holding you captive. Your back arches off the wall, and you struggle to find your voice, your breath coming in short, ragged gasps

"S-so good," you manage to whisper out.

Heeseung’s smile widens, satisfaction gleaming in his eyes. He moistens his hand, his fingers gliding over your clit with a newfound slickness, amplifying the sensation. The friction combined with the wetness sends a jolt of pleasure through you, making you cry out. His movements become more insistent, his fingers expertly playing your body.

Heeseung’s fingers maintain their relentless rhythm, each movement pushes toward your climax.

His fingers dive lower, exploring your wetness before returning to your clit, now wet with your cunt and his cock. He adds a third finger, sliding them inside you, curling them just right to hit that sensitive spot that makes your knees almost give out. Your body is caught in a whirlwind of pleasure as you hear him say,"Tell me how much you want this."

"I need you so bad, heeseung. please, don’t stop." You moan out unable to keep quiet.

His eyes darken with desire, and increases the pace of his fingers, thrusting them deeper inside you. The sound of your wetness fills the dungeons. But you two are not scared of getting caught.

"Come for me. Show me how much you wanted me all these years."

His words is your signal. With a final, high-pitched moan, you come, your body clenching around his fingers, the pleasure crashing over you in waves.

As you calm down, he takes his fingers out of you, bringing them to his lips and licking them clean, his eyes never leaving yours. The sight is intense.

Heeseung kisses you, lips claiming yours with a new level of neediness. You can taste yourself on his tongue, a reminder of the pleasure he just gave you.

He pulls away from the kiss, his eyes dark with desire as he looks down at you, his breath ragged.

Heeseung’s eyes glow with desire, as he aligns his cock with your entrance, his tip touching your sensitive clit, making you gasp.

Heeseung chuckles darkly as he slams into you, a broken groan leaving his lips. He begins to fuck into you at an ungodly pace and you cling to him, moans and desperate cries leaving your lips. Heeseung's lips find your neck and bite at the skin there as he continues to snap his hips into yours and every time his pelvis connects with yours, you feel going to heaven and back.

"You’re so tight." He groans, his voice rough. "Damn you make me feel so good."

You can only moan in response, your body meeting his thrusts eagerly, the pleasure overwhelming. Heeseung’s movements become more uneven, his control slipping as he nears his own climax. He reaches between your bodies, his fingers finding your clit and rubbing it in time with his thrusts.

The dual sensation is too much, and you feel yourself moving toward another climax.

"Cummming for me again babygirl? yeah?" He says, his forehead still on yours, his breathing ragged.

With a final, powerful thrust, he sends you over the edge, your orgasm crashing over you in a wave of ecstasy.

He follows you moments later, his own release tearing through him, his hips stuttering as he spills inside you. He collapses on top of you, his breath ragged and his body trembling.

You pulls your panties up as you sit down on the dungeon floor tired.

He sits down and pulls you onto his lap."Fuck, you are mine." he bites his lips and places his head in the hollow of your neck.

"Gata Only."

THE END-----

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Hope you enjoyed the story! You can send me your request and ideas! I love reading them. Requests open to be in my perm taglist..

[intuitive-revelations]

Jumbled thoughts and theories on belief and metaphysical engines, the Nexus, and fate of the Web of Time...

"Do all those gods seriously exist (not just as alien fakes) in the DW universe? How did the Doctor supposedly meet them?"

Keep in mind, belief making something real is hardly a new theme for DW. The most obvious example for this would be belief in the Doctor being able to empower him in The Last of the Time Lords.

We also know that every story has a place in reality, with the Land of Fiction, not to mention the Doctor's own statement in The Gallifrey Chronicles:

"My dear, one of the things you'll learn is that it's all real. Every word of every novel is real, every frame of every movie, every panel of every comic strip."

But I hear you. Suppose, for example, we want a more concrete example of this applied to religion:

Look no further than the series I've long batted for: Class.

In "The Metaphysical Engine, or What Quill Did", Quill, Ballon and Dorothea literally travel into several afterlife realms using something called "the reliquary", or a "metaphysical engine".

DOROTHEA: This, as best we can tell, is a 'metaphysical engine'. QUILL: Metaphysics? Metaphysics aren't real. It's just thought. DOROTHEA: Everything in the universe is conserved. Everything. Even belief. Get millions of creatures believing something strongly enough for long enough and even space responds.

Quill even gets to meet (and fight) the goddess of her own people:

"Ok, so there is a device that can take you into a theoretical space where beliefs are real, you haven't answered how the Doctor is going about meeting these gods."

Is now a good time to mention that the metaphysical engine is bigger on the inside?

"Yeah, but so are a lot of things, even the Barber's ship..."

Except, there really is more here. Because the TARDIS itself is a metaphysical engine. Canonically. Explicitly.

In the First Doctor Short Trip "Every Day", the TARDIS actually ends up seemingly landing in a man's head, as he struggles to come to terms with his wife having an affair, which manifests as a time loop. Once it's broken, they suddenly find themselves far gone from the loop:

"What happened?" asked Ian, looking around in shock. One minute they had been in the house, the next they were on their way. "I don't know for sure," said the Doctor. "But my TARDIS, you see, is a metaphysical engine. It can travel through all the dimensions related to space and time. It's possible that, on this occasion, we entered the dimension of one man's mind. One man's imagination."

Other stories have similarly seen the TARDIS breach into metaphysical space, even at one point physically landing in the Doctor's own mind in the VNAs.

Some of the Doctor's other meetings with legendary, mythical, or fictional characters (even on-screen: the Devil, Robin Hood, Santa Claus etc.) start to also make a bit more sense, don't they?

This all perhaps also shouldn't feel that incongruous, considering we had the Doctor literally end-up in Bethlehem in time for the birth of Christ just this Christmas (even if that one wasn't itself by the TARDIS).

This, perhaps, also sheds light on how the Barber's plan really was going to work.

I mentioned in my live reaction that the "World Wide Web / Nexus" strongly resembled the idea of the Web of Time (with "signals" even being transmitted through it in a way resembling the Matrix). Well the Web of Time, in expanded universe lore, is partially constructed through something called the "Observer Effect", in which temporal probabilities become fixed in history, named after the real-life effect in quantum physics. Through this, history becomes fixed by those that perceive it - designed to enforce Time Lord dominance over history.

For an in-show example, think of the laws of fixed points established by The Angels Take Manhattan: if you read your own future, you fix it into being. This is one reason why the Time Lords ostensibly forbid Time Lords from interacting with one's own past or future, despite the many times we've seen this violated.

I'd make an argument that the Nexus, if it's not literally connected to the Web of Time in some way, effectively serves a similar purpose. Just as observers can shape history, the Nexus allows believers to shape reality, via the effect Dorothea mentioned previously. By controlling it, the gods secure their own existence, just as controlling the Web of Time secures that of the Time Lords. If it is destroyed, those stories are lost, just as history as we know it is transformed by the degradation of the Web of Time.

This may sound like a lot of fanwank, but I have a suspicion that this kind of thinking with regards to the Web of Time is good to keep in mind over the next few episodes.

I theorised after Episode 1 that the TARDIS trying to "pull" itself back to Earth via the Web of Time is what resulted in those various landmarks somehow ending up pulled into the middle of space between MissBelindaChandra-1 and the Earth. That these represented sort-of "node points" in the Earth's history as represented in the Web, and by continuing to pull when it couldn't arrive, the TARDIS had actually pulled them towards it, rather than the other way round.

One episode on, and we get the "vindicators", devices designed to do exactly what I just said!

DOCTOR: We land anywhere, and the vindicator casts out a signal, like a fishing line - whoosh! - to May 24th, 2025, and we use it to pull the TARDIS in like a hook. So we must land.

ANOTHER episode later, and it's revealed that Mrs. Flood (hey remember she said she literally wanted to seize God's kingdom?) actually wants the Doctor to be using the vindicators? We also discover, even more concerningly, that Earth's future history, despite its significance to the universe, has been completely erased.

Next week in Episode 4, we get a relatively grounded episode, that ends with someone "rejecting the Doctor's reality", who is then seemingly recruited by Flood.

Finally, this week, we get this: a story of someone determined to control / tear down a Web stretched over time and space.

Put all this together with the ongoing decline in Rassilon's established laws of rationality, which started after the devastation of Gallifrey in Series 12 and the creation of the Flux, but accelerated after the Doctor fell to the point of using superstition outside the bounds of the Time Lord noosphere in Wild Blue Yonder, and what we know about the final two episodes, including episode titles (which I won't repeat here for spoilers), and it quickly starts to seem like Mrs. Flood might be planning to tear apart the Web of Time.

This may admittedly seem like a bit too much for casual viewers, but the vindicator element at least I'm feeling pretty confident with. If this WILL actually connect to the Web of Time, we'll see, but today's episode didn't exactly dissuade me...

[killlust]

Dangerous but divine. | 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐀 𝐒𝐀𝐋𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐀. 𐙚 Marisela was never meant to live a quiet life. The daughter of a notorious mastermind wanted across Europe for planning and executing high-stakes bank heists, her name has always carried the weight of whispers. Her mother, a once-beautiful woman swallowed by addiction, spent more time with a bottle than with her own child. And so, Marisela grew up between locked doors and louder silences, learning early that trust was a fragile, dangerous thing. Despite the chaos of her upbringing, Marisela found solace in art. Brushstrokes became her language, canvases her confessions. She studied fine arts with a passion so intense it burned through her, and against all odds, she built an empire from it. Today, she owns one of the most prestigious contemporary art museums in Europe—hidden behind glass walls in the old city of Cádiz, Spain. But success hasn’t erased the shadows. Marisela keeps people at arm’s length. Her beauty is sharp, her words sharper. She’s direct, guarded, and impossible to read. Most assume she’s cold. Few realize it’s fear—fear of being known, of being left, of losing control. What none of them know is that Marisela carries a deeper secret still: through her aunt, she inherited the bloodline of a bruja. Magic flows quietly through her veins, ancient and waiting. In a city of salt and sea, Marisela walks alone—an heiress of crime, art, and something much darker.

(you must be 21+ to stay. I don’t open up easily—not to strangers, not to the light. If you’re here for soft stories and happy endings, you’re in the wrong place. I write for those who understand that beauty can be dangerous, that silence speaks, and that shadows sometimes tell the truth better than the sun ever could. If you crave mystery, if you’ve ever felt haunted by your past or drawn to the dark, then maybe—just maybe—you’ll understand me. But don’t get too close. I don’t trust easily, and I don’t stay open for long)

[imstilllosing]

It's exhausting...

to understand people who don't understand me.

to listen to him, and he won't listen to me.

to care for him and not to be taken care of.

to be worried about him and not get worried even a tiny bit about me.

to love him, so dearly, and cannot get the same love I'm giving.

to always be there for him and never for me.

[thirdofdxcember]

[labyrinth-lavie]

Chapitre I

“I fear that you’ve journeyed far ahead, While I’m still anchored by threads of dread.”

I laugh in bitterness, a mask I wear,

For chaos stirs, and cowards leave me bare.

I buried my scars, cast doubts aside, Hoping this time love would abide. I tore down walls, let my guard descend, Risked the fall, dared to mend.

Yet fears of history whispered near, Their echoes laced with doubt and fear. With trembling heart, I let you see, The raw, soft core of vulnerable me.

Our spark burned vivid, a fervent flame, A harmony woven without a name. A fleeting moment that had no name. Your mind, your depth, a masterpiece, A fascination that would never cease.

Through midnight talks, we built a rhyme, Of shared truths and differences sublime. You spoke of futures, hopes so vast, Each syllable echoing promises cast.

But as I opened, you turned away, With fleeting words that left me gray. Your mind adrift, your heart unsure, While I stand raw, aching, pure.

What sways your thoughts, makes feelings regress?

Does knowing me more mean liking me less? The more I know you, the harder you seem to pull away.

[mariathea]

My love for you was passionate and genuine but traumatizing.

[inkstainsonmysheets]

i love avery kylie grambs, she is such a fricking icon.