#vex joe

[convexicalcrow]

"How's he doing?"

"They say he's mostly free of skulk and he's in no pain. We just have to wait for him to wake up."

Scar didn't look at Bdubs, who had come up beside him. Instead he kept looking through the iron door into the room where Cub was sleeping.

"They say he's mostly free of skulk and taking healing potions. They say he's in no pain. We just have to wait for him to wake up."

"You need a break, Scar. You've been here too long," Bdubs said, resting a hand on his arm. "Come and eat. He won't wake by you staring at the door, you know."

Scar sighed. "I know, I know. I just-... I miss him the most when I'm not allowed to be near him. It's just an iron door. I could break it easily. But I know the priests and the Vex are telling me to stay away. There's too much danger if he's still infected. Doesn't mean I wouldn't be in there in a heartbeat if they'd let me though."

Bdubs took his arm. "Come on, Joe's made some nice stew. I'm sure some food will help, yeah?"

"Yeah, yeah, okay. Just come back, Cub. I miss you."

-

Cub... didn't dream, exactly. Dreaming felt like the wrong word. There was a lot of stuff going on in his head, but mostly he slept, unaware of the details of what was happening to him.

The last thing he remembered happening was... unclear. He remembered a labyrinth and a mad king, and something about empires, but none of these things made sense. The mad king looked like no one he recognised, and he kept seeing himself dying over and over in a dark narrow corridor made of stone bricks. Were there other kings? He thought there were other kings. Thirteen crowns kept sitting somewhere in his mind, but they had no names or faces, and just all looked like ornate decorative crowns.

A lot of what he saw seemed obscured by fog. He put this down to his memory lapses. His brain's way of showing him that he didn't remember things clearly, as if he needed a visual metaphor. (He didn't. But whatever.) The fog was usually a blueish grey, but sometimes it looked different, like yellow or green or a weird purplish magenta. He hadn't worked out if these colours had any particular associations.

The other thing he saw frequently were stars. But they were also the wrong colour, more blueish green or turquoise or aqua, and they didn't seem to pattern match to the night sky. Something about it seemed... familiar, but his brain just would not parse this imagery further, so it remained a mystery.

So he slept on, consumed by the darkness weaving a blanket around him, unaware of wings touching the back of his neck, or the eyes watching over him, concerned, but with swords sharp and ready, just in case.

-

A room in the mansion had been transformed into a mess hall by Joe since he'd arrived a few days ago. Scar hadn't really parsed how weird it looked to see them standing behind a kitchen counter, serving bowls of stew and other dishes to the priests and vindicators who lived here, who all seemed quite grateful for their service.

Scar let Bdubs get him some dinner. He felt lost without Cub. Being so far away from him hurt, and if his body hadn't been yelling at him to eat for the past hour, perhaps he'd have run back to him. But Bdubs was right. He needed food and rest. Cub would need him to be at his best once he woke up, and he was sure he would be told the moment he was back.

The Vex had been anxious since the initial purification rituals had been performed and Cub had fallen into some kind of magical coma. The priests didn't know exactly what he'd done to himself, but he'd clearly blasted himself with Vex magic for some unknown reason, and now he was lying there, unable to wake. It was the kind of magic that only Cub could undo. No one else knew what he'd cast on himself except that the skulk was now mostly gone from his system. Which was a good thing, right? Maybe.

-

"Come on, sit down, Scar. I got you some dinner!" Bdubs said as he came back with a tray bearing two bowls of stew and some bread.

Scar smiled. The food did smell delicious. "Hey, that's what I like to see. Thanks, Bdubs."

They found a table in the corner and Bdubs handed him his food before taking a seat beside him.

"Hey, look, we're all worried about him, okay? That's normal. But you'll be no good to him if you don't take care of yourself, yeah?" Bdubs said.

"Yeah, I know, I know. I just feel it in my heart. We share everything. I just want him back. And I want him to be okay. That's all I'm asking for," Scar said.

"Very reasonable requests in my opinion. But don't worry, Cub's a fighter. He'll come back, I just know it," Bdubs said.

"Yeah, yeah, he will. He knows what he's doing, right?" Scar said with a smile, allowing himself to feel a little more optimistic about the situation. Perhaps that would help Cub too.

-

Black water surrounded him. Was he in the water? Or above the water? Or simply surrounded by it? It was impossible to tell. It was the colour of squid ink, an impenetrable liquid through which he could see nothing.

It didn't feel... scary though? It felt strangely comforting. Like this was where he was safe, and whatever had happened to get him to this point could no longer reach him. That was a nice thought.

This had to be hivemind, though. Somewhere. He wasn't Cub anymore. Just his consciousness connected to the Other. Couldn't hear the Vex, but knew they were out there somewhere. Couldn't tell if they were protecting him, or isolating him. Wouldn't blame them for either to be honest.

He phased for a while, his energy shifting and oscillating in the water as if he was cleansing himself. Yes. That's what this was. He remembered now. He'd written about this. In a book somewhere. Somehow, his form had become corrupted, and this was a way he'd discovered to cleanse himself. He'd done it first after... when was it? Oh, he could see someone's face, but then it just became his own face. He could smell gunpowder. But the memories seemed lost to him. But there had definitely been a reason for it. So he could get back to being himself again.

That was reassuring. That's what was happening. He was cleansing himself of any foreign energy, things that weren't of himself, or of the Vex. Yes. Something had happened to cause this, and maybe he'd remember in time, but for now, he oscillated again, letting his energy dissolve into the water.

-

"Er, breaking news from Hermittopia, Scar!" Joe said as they ran over to them waiting outside Cub's room.

"Oh, what's happening?" Scar said. He wasn't expecting Joe to look quite so terrified, but their face was all white, and they were holding their communicator and gesturing in a Not Comforting way.

"Well, y'all know how Cub got skulkified, right? Well, there's someone else now, walking about spreading skulk! It's Pixlriffs! He's infected too now!" Joe said.

"Pix? No, how could he be infected? He didn't go to the fog, did he?" Bdubs said. "That's how Cub got infected."

"X said the last person we know talked to Pix before this happened was Cub, but that was days ago, right? And he's only now showing up like this? I wonder why that is?" Joe said.

"How do we know he's only just been affected? Maybe he's been hiding away since he spoke with Cub and only now making himself known? I wonder how it happened, though. Cub can't have done it, right?" Scar said.

"I dunno, maybe? Maybe he was trying to track down the remaining catalysts and got caught in the skulk! Maybe he wasn't wearing the hazmat suit I left in the museum! Maybe he didn't use the haunted pickaxe! I don't know! But it's clearly not just Cub, and it's spreading!" Joe said. "X said this seems... different now. He wants us back at Hermittopia to work this out."

"No. Absolutely not. I'm not going anywhere without Cub. So while he's still sleeping, I'm staying right here," Scar said.

"Me too. I'm not leaving Scar alone. He needs someone to keep him company. You go back and tell them what's happening," Bdubs said.

"I mean, okay, I can do that for you, but I can't do that Vex travel thing like y'all can, and I don't have enough spare elytra to get back overland or through the nether. We're just too far out! Anyone want to zap me back there again?" Joe said.

Scar looked at Bdubs. "You know, maybe they do deserve to be a Vex. They've been very good to us here, and they've always been a good friend to the Vex. Apart from that one time when they asked if they could cut our wings off to make new elytra! I haven't forgotten that, Joe!"

"Look, it was just a misunderstanding, okay? I don't want your Vex wings. Just. Help a guy out? I don't mind being a messenger, but I can't travel like y'all can," Joe said.

"I think this is a needs must, Scar. Joe's right, we're too far out for them to travel back normally. I'm sure we can take care of this together, right? We can turn him into a Vex?" Bdubs said.

Scar smiled. "Oh, we can definitely turn them into a Vex, and it would be useful for them to be in our fold, I think. Especially when we don't know how long we'll be here for."

"That's what I was thinking. Alright, Joe, come on, let's bring you into the embrace of the Vex," Bdubs said.

"Oh neat! Thanks guys!" Joe said.

[dork-a-doodle]

More muppet!hermits cuz this post has infected my brain

[nyaagolor]

started streaming yttd and starting drawing them as little guys during sessions bc I am insanely predictable

[1captainjordan4]

Some faery requests over in twitter :D

[elven-kisses]

my digital footprint is looking great rn

[jos-has-too-many-hobbies]

Scar is fae like deals and half-truths and selling your soul to a cunning smile

Joe is fae like the mist and the forest like riddles and wit and exchanging a poem for a favor

Hope this helps

[regularconvexheadcanons]

Psst sculk scar anon here- (speaking of could I possibly be tagged as sculk scar anon? I've been having a fun time checking on this blog and seeing the ideas!) Ahem ahem

Vampire Scar

Vampire Hunter Cub

Vampire Hunter Grian (part of a specific hunting group, "Watchers")

Vampire Scar happily living with Cub, teaching him and letting Cub examine things that are interesting about vampire biology! Not mentioning the mythology some vampires know- though the lore of vampire kind differed from coven to coven, but Scars knowledge? Interesting in how much... cannibalism was involved. Not in just blood drinking but full on cannibalism.

It maybe- maybe! got Cub curious about how vampires blood tasted. Maybe he'd get a small vial. Maybe he'd try it. Maybe Scar would be so delighted that he spun Cub around- nooo it was definitely minorly (majorly) getting vampire married. Maybe even a few dances under the moonlight, the loving caretaking of a coffin during daylight during a honeymoon that totally doesn't happen if you were a hunter.

Until Grian met Scar. Meet cute by the beach, helping the poor tourist around, heading to the inn/hostel/hotel/motel (I have no set time for this so m a n y places to be listed) and walking Grian to the door like a gentlemen. Cub waits for Scar to come back from his walk. And waits. And waits. And waits.

And can't wait anymore, suited in his hunter gear just in case, hoping beyond hope that Scar was okay- and he finds nothing. Anywhere. No matter where he searches, he can't get a trace of Scar! It drives Cub insane, slow but *sure*, a neat house being slowly unkempt and gathering dust- until he stumbles upon a power that could help him find Scar. Is it the Vex? Sculk? .....The buried magic of Cubs family? That he's truly from a line of powerful Pharaohs? Who knows! Only thing for certain is that everyone should hope nothing happened to Scar!

oooooh fun AU idea! I can definitely (if you'd allow that) combine this with the supernatural village AU I've been hoping I can find a story for.

I've never done much with vampires or cannibalism (personally a little uncomfortable about cannibalism stuff, but growing more alright with it). The idea of Cub learning about vampires through Scar is cool, and protecting him from vampire hunters at the same time.

I had another thought though: what if Scar's pretending he's a vampire because they're more socially acceptable than Vexlings like himself. And maybe Cub figures this out, because all of Scar's vampire information is slightly wrong. Not much, because he's studied a lot about magic, but definitely wrong or misguided.

But Scar getting lost, and Cub using all the magic he can control to get him back (or threaten people), especially if it's after Scar meets vampire-hunter Grian. (This fits so well with my idea of GIGS being phasmo-style ghost hunters in my AU, Cub would be terrified that they realised he was a Vexling, the possessed host of a Vex ghost and did something to him).

And this idea has added a thought of fully leaning into the supernatural with this AU and having all sorts of curses (Canary curse), and werewolf!Ren, ghost!Joe and zombie!Cleo.

[babe-heffron]

I will say malarkeys depiction of winters in his book is very interesting

[jaz-it-up]

oh yeah i meant to send this! can you write something about scar and joe? platonic, romantic, or somewhere in-between are all fine

"So... which one do I look at?"

"The puppet!" The cheerfulness in Joe's tone was clear as glass, despite the inability to change expression due to being made of felt. "Don't mind the body. That's technically also me, but I'm not too sure whether I'm getting back into that anymore."

"Back into... your body," Scar clarified.

"Yep!" Joe nodded, strings of yarn-hair falling into eir face. "Keralis was right, y'know. Being a puppet is way easier than keeping up with the countless needs of the flesh."

Joe said that like Scar didn't know that, in a much worse sense. Ey said that like Scar didn't live for years with a mask on his face, sinking its little claws deeper and deeper into his soul until they were inseparable; like Scar was unaware of how dragging a corpse felt, especially your own.

"I can imagine," Scar replied, because he knew if he said anything else he would maybe start breaking down and make this whole thing much more awkward than it needed to be.

"You ought to give it a try sometime," Joe offered. "Becoming a felt puppet. Or a sock puppet. Or any kind of fabric puppet, really. Only if you want to, though. You seem to be thinking awfully loud in a language I don't think you want me to understand."

If Scar hadn't already been sitting in his wheelchair, he'd have sat right down on the grass by his train and just... stared into the distance. Did Joe really know what he was thinking? Did ey happen to guess based on prior experience?

What a strange puppet, that Joe Hills. A strange, strange puppet.

[kozzax]

he's gonna kill us cub... he's gonna kill us

[unproduciblesmackdown]

pics from this article! ragababy confirmation

[convexicalcrow]

Can I ask? I’ve read a lot of your fics by now, and the way you write the vex is interesting.

What are some of your personal headcanons of these guys? They seem equal parts pleasure givers and evil spirits.

Scar seems to be the default leader (which I don’t see often as usually people make it Cub).

Also how does someone get chosen by the vex in your AU’s?

Thanks!

These are all great questions, anon! Thank you for reading and enjoying my fics enough to ask about my lore. I adore talking about my lore and I'm going to enjoy answering these questions for sure. :D

This is gonna be a long post, so Imma split it up into sections to make it easier to digest as I ramble on about my lore. <3

Vex Headcanons and Lore

So, I tend to see the Vex as very hedonistic creatures. They're pleasure-seekers and sometimes aggressively so. It's just, murder is also one of those things they find pleasurable. So they are evil spirits! But they are also hedonists. They will happily indulge in cake and diamonds while also enjoying some light murder. They primarily attack with their swords, but also by biting. Not all Vex eat people, but some do, like Scar.

I don't see the Vex as like, servitors or familiars created and controlled by Evokers. The Vex, to me, are a collective hivemind who look out for themselves and have their own goals and agency.

Mostly, they are selfish creatures who really only look out for the Vex, and this is broadly true. Even when they are working towards finding a cure for skulk infections in Fog, it's primarily motivated by clearing the skulk from Cub, a fellow Vex, but they also do not like the skulk and that is like the one thing they will selflessly work towards fighting against.

I do have separate lore surrounding Evokers taking Allays down to ancient cities to convert them into Vexes with skulk, but that's not really part of my broader Vex lore.

The Vex do need the Evokers though, and they work together on the same goals. The Evokers gain assistance in protecting mansions and fighting in raids, and the Vex gain a gateway to the overworld, albeit temporarily if they are not named or possessing a player. It's a symbiotic relationship where the Evokers serve the Vex and enable their plans to come into fruition.

The Vex exist in a fourth dimension when they are not in the overworld. That's where they're summoned from. I call this Vexspace, as it's where the Vex reside. It's separate from the overworld, nether, and the End, but can access all of those dimensions, so the Vex can be summoned anywhere. It's accessible to the Vex, but not to the Evokers. It is also constant. Scar and Cub are always connected to it, unless they are either forcibly shut out (as in Fog my skulk Cub saga), or if they choose to do so. Not being connected to the hivemind means the Vex no longer have access to their thoughts, but on the other hand, Vexspace is no longer accessible, so using it for fast travel is not possible.

Fast travel is a way to use Vexspace to travel between mansions and pillager towers across the overworld almost instantly, speeding up extremely long travel that would otherwise take hours even through the nether. (This ignores that the game only spawns mansions up to a certain distance out; they can spawn anywhere for me.)

Mansions are safe havens for the Vex. Evokers act as priests and healers, and as particularly strong centres of power for Vex magic. This is why they are protected. The Vex use the mansions as overworld bases, seeing the world through the eyes of their Evokers. From here, they can carry out plans for controlling territory and enacting other plans they have.

Also! The blood thing! For me, the Vex enjoy feeding on blood. They're not vampires, and they definitely don't need it to live, but it's a pleasureable act for them, and they seek out those with very tasty sweet blood. Which is why they feed on Cub a lot because they love the taste of his blood. It's a way of bonding as much as sustaining the Vex and giving an offering to them. Giving your body up to them to feed off is a sacrifice and a willing one that Cub often makes because he's masochistic enough to enjoy it. It's part of his worship of the Vex.

And that worship aspect that Cub and Scar brought in with the Cathedral is important. There is a hierarchy. It's strict but it's not strict at the same time. The Vex are creatures worthy of worship, and the things being offered include blood that was laid on the offering tables. This distinguishes Scar and Cub as players and Vexes as being on a different level to those in the hivemind as players turned into Vexes are like Vexes that have been named, and can therefore persist in the overworld. Because Vexes normally don't have names because they have no need for them.

Scar as Leader

This is... Okay. See, I think this is more an extension of their personalities and of Scar having a more natural leadership energy than Cub does. It's also related to their roles as Vex and how they work best together. They complement each other very well. But Scar isn't The Leader by default either. They are both in service to the Vex and obey them as their masters. I see them as equal partners, just with different roles and abilities. Scar is better as a leader/front, and Cub is better behind the scenes with redstone stuff, but this doesn't make one The Leader over the other. They're both capable of driving things along on their own, and they both contribute ideas to their future plans.

For the more kinky side of their dynamic, I do tend to write Scar more Dommy than not, which may also tie into this, but Cub is just as capable of that, it's just not usually his preference. When Cub does Dom, he's usually much more gentle than Scar, who's more sadistic than him, because they want different things out of a Dom when they are subbing.

For me, Scar is the salesman. The leader. The one who can do the talking and wield the power of the ConVex and ConCorp in ways that Cub isn't as good at. Scar is motivated by power, and seeks out power, and so that's what he does with the assistance of the Vex. As a Vex, he is tuned in with the Vex magic currents that flow between the three realms and Vexspace. He can make those connections and bring power and magic between them. And yet, he is still weak to the pleasure of Vex magic, much more than Cub is.

As for Cub, he's the brains for sure. He's good at strategy, tech, seeing where opportunties are to make even more wealth, and does more of the behind the scenes work. He can absolutely be a leader, but he'll make Scar front things and work from his plans. As a Vex, Cub is motivated by pleasure, and acts as a vessel. If the Vex are going to possess one of them, it's going to be Cub. He's basically given his body over to the Vex to do with as they wish, and he's in a much more subservient position with the Vex than Scar is. At the same time, Cub is still motivated by power and wealth, but these are more public-facing motivations and drive a lot of what he does. But there's more going on internally than that suggests.

You can't have one without the other. On his own, Cub would be lost, and there wouldn't be as great a drive without Scar. He would still do well, but he needs that bigger picture energy that Scar brings to really shine. And Scar needs Cub to do the infrastructure and tech stuff that he just can't do. Scar could definitely have build the aethetics of the ConCorp industrial park, but the farms would have been beyond his skill level, especially the super-smelter. it's only together that they are able to shine and profit handsomely from their efforts. They make an excellent team and you can tell they are aware of this as well.

How Do The Vex Choose People?

There are no real hard and fast rules on this for me, but I do tend to work from those who canonically are/were friendly to the ConVex/ConCorp or aligned with them, helped them out in some way, or just feel like they should be Vex.

Why did Cub get chosen? They could sense his use and his skills, and his prankster urges. He's also a big grinder, so they know he'll put in the work if they give it to him. Plus, that late stage capitalism sense, of profitting at any cost. This was less important in s5 bc of the lack of Stuff being sold, but it definitely came into play in s6 for sure.

Scar, of course, has similar vibes and values as a player, and being close to Cub, they can be sure he's going to work well with him. And he has those other motivations and he can play a slightly different role to Cub and make them both successful.

So it's finding the right sort of player who's got the right sort of values. Don't pick a couple of guys to start a war if they aren't immoral enough to not only instigate war, but also get the two teams to pay them for the privilege of fighting it.

There are good reasons as to why the fics I have of them becoming Vexes are quite different, even if there are similar scenarios/motifs. Cub, being motivated more by pleasure and subservience, is more open to being seduced by the pleasures of Vex magic than Scar would be. For Scar, he craves power and wealth, and self-preservation. Scar dying from that fall to earn his Vex head is something that was necessary to get Scar to agree, because they can simply let him die if he doesn't join. But they also offer the things he wants the most, and pranking Hermits and hanging out with Cub are two of those things.

Then we get to the others! False, Joe, and Bdubs! These are the other three that I've written as Vexes and I'll talk a little about why them in particular, and why they might have been chosen.

False is probably the most obvious of the three. She helped them out in s5 with the prank on X's base, and was named as an honourary Vex and given a Vex head. So making her a proper Vex isn't that much of a stretch. The Vex like her and trust her, and why would you not want the strongest pvper on the server on your side when you are a hivemind who loves a good murder?

But in her conversion fic, she has a totally different process. She isn't just seduced into joining, because that's not really her style, but also that's not what they want from her. She fights them, because power and a vessel aren't going to do anything without a Will to give that power intent and direction, and that's what False brings, on top of the corruption and greed she carries with her. Plus the whole evil clone thing ofc.

For Joe, he's a friend, and in Fog, he was kind to those in the mansion. He fed them and befriended some Vexes, and that kindness was rewarded with becoming a Vex, so he could do the fast travel he needed to help them with the skulk cure. I am undecided if Vex Joe is something I'd write more of outside of that specific AU, but we'll see. Stranger things have happened.

Bdubs is a special one, and it's based on only one thing, and that's him falling into s6 with an elytra named 'Vex Wings'. Neither Scar nor Cub have ever called their elytra that, so it's an odd choice for sure. bc why carried named elytra anyway for an entrance like that and do absolutely nothing with that named elytra? For me, it's more relevant in s7 with Bdubs approaching Scar to convince him to run for Mayor, because Cub was busy doing other Pharaoh things and a Vex never works alone. Cub just isn't motivated by power enough to run for Mayor himself, let alone convince Scar to run for Mayor, but Bdubs could do it for sure. And that's why he was chosen.

Sure, Cub does eventually work for him as his enforcer, but Scar clearly wanted him as much because he was a Vex than anything else. So you have three Vex in the Town Hall wielding power over the server in a different capacity than with ConCorp. Again, it's that Vex drive to seek power over the server, and Scar is a natural leader for that specific thing. Cub couldn't have done that. And Scar is great at playing villains and should have been more villainous as the Mayor and I am forever salty that he wasn't, even if I do understand why he didn't push it too far.

I have, like, a ton more things I could say about all of this but my hands are getting sore again :( so please do send asks if there's anything else you'd like me to ramble about! <3

[downthetubes]

Rebellion Releases: 2000AD Prog 2320 out now

The latest edition of the Galaxy's Greatest Comic, featuring a classy cover by Cliff Robinson and Dylan Teague, is out now

Celebrating 46 years in print, 2000AD Prog 2320, the latest edition of the Galaxy’s Greatest Comic, featuring a classy cover by Cliff Robinson and Dylan Teague, is out now, offering another ghafflebette assault on the senses courtesy of my ever-busy creator-bots. There’s more mekmayhem, time-splitting terror, cosmic carnage and world-hopping wonder in the latest instalments of “Joe Pineapples“,…

[dilfsuzanneyk]

naming myself joe just so i can make Hey Joe jokes

[1captainjordan4]

Some faery requests over in twitter :D

[vexcraft]

obsessed with how the conversation just kinda stills after joe asks scar and cub (vexes) and jevin (a slime) which one of them is the monster nearby. they're just kinda laughing and looking at each other while bdubs tries to sleep