#we deserved milah as captain hook

[kazoosandfannypacks]

A few tropes I've seen in Captain Swan AUs that I adore

(by no means a comprehensive list, nor are these present in every fic!)

David and Emma are siblings. In almost every modern au, David is Emma's overprotective older brother, and Mary Margaret is her sister-in-law. They are almost never her parents.

Liam is alive! Victory!

Liam is not alive! Angst!

Rumbelle must be fixed. There is an innate realization in CaptainSwan fans that Rumplestiltskin has committed too many errors and Belle deserves better, so I'm delighted by how many modern aus pair her off with someone else entirely, as a treat. This often pairs well with a Liam Lives AU.

Elsa! Elsa only showed up in half a season of ouat, but she's often given a sister or close friend role for Emma, and that's honestly very beautiful.

Jefferson and Hook are friends. These guys literally never interact in canon, but they have a good fanon friendship for whatever reason

While the villainization of Milah, Neal and Walsh is common in fics, I have never seen a fic in which Graham is the evil ex boyfriend. In this house we honor Graham Humbert.

Brennan Jones is a bad dad, always, in every universe. I remember reading a fic where not only was Brennan still alive and being a bad dad, but Cora was Killian's stepmother, and there was a section where Bennan told Cora off for something she did and I thought "wow, you know you're a bad parent when Brennan Jones calls you out on it."

[moistvonlipwig]

OUAT Week Day 5: Favorite parallel(s)

Here's a riddle for you.

Once upon a time, there was a man. A father, to be precise, who loved his child with all his heart. The child's mother had left, so the father was the only parent the child had left. One day the father met a man, a pirate, who mocked him for his softness and weakness, for that is what the pirate thought being a loving father was: soft and weak. But the pirate was not unreasonable; he gave the father the chance to prove him wrong. He challenged the father to a duel. But, of course, such a venture was risky, as the father's child was waiting for him back home, and needed him to come home safe.

What did the father say? Did he say no?

Or did he say yes?

When we first meet Killian Jones in 2.04 "The Crocodile," he takes on the role of the pirate in the story above: the tormentor who believes that putting your child first is worthy of scorn. "A man unwilling to fight for what he wants," he declares, "deserves what he gets" -- an impressive bit of rhetorical theatre that erases the very personhood of Milah and Baelfire both, instead constructing a world that revolves around the figure of the "man" and his success or failure to live up to a hyper-individualist and violent ideal of masculinity. No one else figures into the equation -- not women and certainly not children. To even consider putting fatherhood before being "a man," in Killian's worldview, is nothing but weakness.

By the time 7.13 "Knightfall" rolls around, Killian is now in the role of the father in the story, faced with the choice to duel a pirate and affirm his masculinity through meaningless violence or to go straight home to Alice and free her from the tower without risking his life first. It is no accident that he finds himself in the same situation he once put Rumpelstiltskin in so many years ago. Rather, it is a necessary step in his journey of redemption, growth, and healing.

Like so many other villains and former villains on Once Upon a Time, Killian was once a victim of other people's actions, but over time he has become his own worst enemy. Therefore, it is himself and his own false ideology that he must defeat in order to progress on his journey. So while Captain Ahab is not literally Killian, the way the Split Evil Queen is literally half of Regina or Wish Rumple is literally a version of Rumple, he is metaphorically Killian, and specifically Killian from "The Crocodile."

Captain Ahab makes metatextual sense as a mirror-Killian. Melville's Ahab was a direct inspiration for Barrie's Captain Hook -- in their source texts, both captains lose limbs to sea creatures and dedicate their lives to pursuing revenge against the ones they blame for this loss. And Captain Ahab's name is practically synonymous with obsession and revenge in popular culture. Ahab is revenge made flesh, the originator of the legacy of vengeance and violence that all Captain Hooks are heir to, here to tempt Killian into undoing the work he did in 7.07 "Eloise Gardener" to give up his revenge and his old pirate life behind for the sake of his child.

"Eloise Gardener" is a major turning point for Killian, arguably the biggest one possible. It is the moment where he chooses Alice over his quest for revenge, and in doing so rejects the version of himself who sold Baelfire to Pan, who orphaned and abandoned Liam II, who hated his father and Rumpelstiltskin so much that (as Bae put it) he didn't even realize he had become just like them. In this moment, he chooses not to continue down the path of becoming like his father, instead choosing to identify himself with his mother, who stayed with him "as long as she could." He names his daughter after her; he sings the same lullaby to his infant child that she used to sing to him; he promises to follow her example in staying with his child. He breaks the cycle he's been trapped in for literal centuries.

But that is not the end of the story. Just as Regina choosing Henry over the curse in the 3.09 "Save Henry" flashbacks was not the end of her story. She still had a lot to learn. And so, at this point, does Killian.

Thus, when faced with the same choice Rumple was faced with all those years ago, Killian chooses wrong. Unlike Rumple, he does not swallow his pride and go home to his child, even as Wish Rumple begs and cajoles him to do just that. Wish Rumple has his own self-serving reasons for not wanting Killian to accept the duel, but it is hard not to see him as an echo of the past, urging Killian to make the same choice he himself once made. But Killian doesn't listen. He accepts the duel, choosing the path set for him by Ahab -- his mirror-self, the reflection of the man he once was, his own false ideology that he has yet to truly reckon with. And it costs him everything.

Although he does not die in the duel, the way Rumple surely would have if he'd accepted Killian's challenge, Alice still loses him. A tiny graze from Ahab's bullet permanently poisons his heart and makes it impossible for Killian to stay with his daughter the way he once promised to. It is a profound cruelty on Gothel's part, but perhaps the cruelest part of it is that Killian, like all great tragic heroes, did it to himself. He chose to risk never coming home to his daughter, and that choice in itself ensured he never would. His own twisted ideology has failed him, and he has been forced to confront just how wrong and empty it truly is.

But this is not the end of the story, either. Indeed, in its own way, it is a kind of new beginning. For all that the curse of the poisoned heart is an awful thing for Killian and Alice to endure, Killian's experience with the duel does ultimately change him for the better. Not instantly, for it is hard to change without a support system, especially when you are suffering; but once he has people who have his back, he is able to take the lesson he's learned to heart. What is that lesson? That there is nothing in the world that matters more than one's child; that cleaving children from good parents who love them is nothing but petty cruelty; that being a good father is more important than being "a man" who is willing to "fight for what he wants"; that what he did to Rumple centuries ago was wrong.

Once Killian has learned this lesson, he can overcome his own previous failings as a sort of anti-father figure (or in other words, a Captain Hook -- George Darling's other face, a man whom "no little children love"). Instead of separating families and orphaning children, Killian helps keep families together. He abandons his plan to replace expectant father Storybrooke Hook in 7.02 "A Pirate's Life"; he helps reunite Zelena with Robin Jr. in 7.11 "Secret Garden"; he defends Regina's decision to cast the curse to save Henry in 7.10 "The Eighth Witch"; and, perhaps most touchingly, he gives Jacinda the white elephant to keep her and Lucy together in that same episode, sacrificing his own chance at a life with Alice to do so.

He becomes a living embodiment of loving fatherhood, surpassing not just his past self and his own father but Rumpelstiltskin as well. Indeed, in 7.22 "Leaving Storybrooke", he dies redeeming Rumpelstiltskin's greatest betrayal of Baelfire -- Killian keeps hold of Alice's hand while a portal threatens to separate them even as her very touch kills him, in sharp contrast to Rumple's series-defining moment in 1.19 "The Return" when he lets go of Bae's hand for fear of losing his power. Rumple, in turn, dies redeeming Killian's greatest transgression against Alice -- he gives Killian his heart to replace the one Killian poisoned with his choice to duel Ahab. Rumple, whom Killian taunted when they first met for choosing to get home safe to his son rather than risk his life, gives his life so that Killian can get home safe to his daughter, and in doing so finally heals the wound Killian inflicted on himself all those years ago when he made the opposite choice.

It is a powerful and beautiful ending for Killian and Rumpelstiltskin both: an ending where they redeem themselves by redeeming and healing each other, where they do for Alice what neither could do for Baelfire, where they defeat the ghosts of their past selves for good and pave the way for a better future. And it was all set in motion a long, long time ago -- with a father, a pirate, and an offer to duel.

[a-rose-for-gold]

“The Crocodile”

Okay. I was typing a reblog and it somehow became a rant/spiel, so I’m making a whole post about it.

“The Crocodile” Episode? I know a this isn’t exactly an unpopular opinion, but I’mma say it anyway.

Hook and Milah. Had. It. COMING.

Granted - Hook became cool eventually. But I hated him for a LOT of the series on the grounds of his first impression alone.

Like it’s one thing to run off with a man’s wife. Rumple and Milah weren’t in love and the marriage wasn’t a good one. She put zero effort into their family and taking her off their hands may arguably have been better for everyone.

Seriously. Fuck Milah.

Spinner Rumple tried so hard to be a good husband and father, or at least to make their family work in a loveless marriage, and he deserved better.

But in spite of that, what Hook did to him on the ship crossed so many lines and he totally deserved to get owned for it.

Let’s review:

Concerned husband boards a pirate ship to beg for his wife back, thinking she’s been abducted. Right off the bat: That right there took courage. It always pisses me off when OUAT characters call Spinner Rumple a coward, because he really wasn’t. The world put him through it and he was doing his damn best. Just showing up to the ship of bloodthirsty pirates, knowing that literally all he could do was beg and hope for the best, took guts.

Back to Hook. So this poor guy shows up to ask for his wife back unharmed. And shy of actually hurting Rumple, Hook decides to do quite possibly the cruelest thing he could have done:

Keep letting the spinner think that his wife had been taken against her will and that she was being raped by the whole crew.

If Milah was in on the lie, then in my opinion SHE was the cowardly one here. Not Rumple. You want to abandon your disabled husband and son to run off and live the high life with a pirate? Own your shit.

But no. Instead they pushed the blame onto Rumple and gaslit this poor man into thinking it was somehow his fault.

Yeah - Rumple didn’t pick up the sword when Hook challenged him to a duel over Milah. But let’s think about that for a sec shall we?

We have Rumplestiltskin: An older wool spinner with a disability. Who can’t walk all that well WITH his walking stick - much less without it, on a boat, and during a fight with a sword. Which he’s barely held in his life unless you count the crash-course he got as fodder- I mean a new recruit, when he was drafted into the Ogres War.

Versus Captain Jones: A younger, taller, stronger pirate. An experienced swordsman, comfortable on a ship, and with two good legs. AND with a loyal crew of OTHER strapping pirates who would probably kill Rumple even if by some miracle he DID take Hook by surprise or something.

So really, Rumple had two options here.

Option A: Refuse to fight the bloodthirsty pirate, leave with your life but without your wife, and return home to your now motherless son.

Option B: Fight the bloodthirsty pirate, probably die or at least get badly injured (which could be death within a few days-weeks anyway given his financial situation and living conditions), the pirate takes your wife anyway, and your son is left an orphan who may or may not ever know what happened to you.

So there was no realistic scenario here where he fights off the pirates like a dashing hero and carries his wife home.

What else was he supposed to do?!

Rumplestiltskin is extremely smart. He always was. He knows when to pick his battles and he would have known all of that at a glance.

Refusing to fight wasn’t cowardice. It was common sense.

And yet Hook, this mothafucka, who must have realized all of this too and put Rumple in this situation in the first place, had the gall to act disgusted about it when Rumple refused to “fight like a man.” And then gaslit him into thinking that he was a coward and a fool for making what was obviously the more rational decision.

Now Hook is a pirate. I never would have expected much from him. But that’s no excuse. What he did was fucked. And karma is a bitch.

Stupid Game = Stupid Prize

And yes I know this is a pretty commonly held opinion so it shouldn’t be new to anyone but I rewatched that episode recently and needed to get this off my chest. 😤

[whimsicallyenchantedrose]

whimsicallyenchantedrose

Season 2 Rewatch Drabbles--2x21-2x22 Second Star to the Right ... And Straight on Til Morning

Summary:  A series of 100-500 word drabbles to accompany my    rewatch of season 2 of Once Upon a Time as an attempt to finally jump    start the muse again.  There will be a drabble–either a deleted scene, a    “fix it” fic or a character musing for each episode of the season.  Focus will be on Emma, Henry, the Charmings and Killian–with an emphasis on the very beginnings of Captain Swan’s epic love story, as soon as a certain dashing pirate makes his appearance.  

Word Count: 766 (why did I think I could stick to a word count again?)

@jrob64​  @anmylica​   @booksteaandtoomuchtv

Other Chapters: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) (15) (16) (17) (17.5) (18) (19) (20) (22)

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hook stood at the wheel of the Jolly Roger looking out at the horizon as he sailed determinedly out of Storybrooke.

They’d all gone mad.  All of them, even Swan.  What manner of fools these heroes were.  Willing to risk all of their lives–the lives of everyone in the town–for the miniscule chance of saving the Evil Queen, of all people.

The Evil Queen whom they should rightly want to see dead for her part in trapping her in this strange little town in the first place.

He’d returned to town with Greg and Tamara, seduced by their vow to help him kill his Crocodile once and for all, but it had been the work of mere moments to realize the pair were blithering idiots, mindless zealots for a cause they didn’t understand at the behest of a master they didn’t even know.

When they’d revealed the full extent of their plan to him–destroying the town and everyone not born in this land, he’d realized he’d been an utter fool to throw in his lot with them.  Aye, their plan would kill the Dark One, but it would also kill everyone else in this town, including him.

Including Swan.  How she’d so thoroughly gotten under his skin, even after she’d betrayed him–twice: once on the beanstalk and then again when she locked him in a broom closet in New York–he didn’t know.  All he knew for sure was that she’d been right.

The two of them understood each other.  There was some manner of tether connecting her to him, one that he hardly had time to ponder with the end of the word staring him in the face.

For a split second he’d actually considered staying the course, letting the failsafe do its job and ridding the world of the Dark One forever.

But then he’d remembered the conversation he’d had with Regina in the mines. Do you ever think this constant pursuit of revenge is the reason we have no one to care for us?

He’d spent centuries hunting his Crocodile, willing to do all manner of dastardly deeds in the furtherance of that goal, but this … this was a step too far.  Hook had never minded committing villainous acts to those who deserved it, those who got in his way, but Greg and Tamara proposed massacring an entire town of innocents.

It was the height of bad form.

And so he’d turned to the heroes, and for a moment he’d thought they’d found a solution to their problems–until Queen Snow had convinced the rest to go along with her hare-brained scheme of tossing the failsafe into a portal.

He’d taken his leave then, ready to wash his hand of the entire town–heroes, villains, all of them.  The only one he could depend on was himself.

As he continued to sail, he looked down at the sparkly magic bean in his hand, and his eye caught the letters he’d carved into the helm on that day so many years ago.

Bae.

He’d let the boy down, serving him up to Pan on a silver platter, as it were.  Of all of his deeds, that was perhaps the one of which he was the most ashamed.  He’d chosen himself over the boy, over his Milah’s son.

And now he was doing the same to Bae’s lad.

Hook closed his eyes as the pain washed over him.  He didn’t want to be that man any more.  He’d made the selfish choice centuries ago, but he needn’t repeat that error.  He blew out a long breath and then pocketed the bean, slowly turning the wheel to head back into port.

This plan was still reckless.  It was still stupid. 

But it was the right thing to do.  He might well perish in a matter of hours, but at least he would die doing the right thing.

He would die a hero.

Notes:  Sorry for the delay!  I got caught up writing birthday fics, and this rewatch drabbles series fell a bit to the wayside.

–As you can see from the title, this particular chapter kind of encompasses both 2x21 and 2x22.  The truth is, there wasn’t much in 2x21 that inspired me, aside from themes I’ve already explored earlier in the series.  In contrast, I really, really wanted to explore things from both Hook’s and Emma’s perspectives in the events of 2x22, so I decided this was the best option.  Combining 2x21 and 2x22 and writing a chapter from each character.  Emma’s reflection should be up (assuming the muse cooperates) tomorrow, and then it’s on to Neverland!

NEXT CHAPTER-->

[insanelydeadlybookcollector]

Heya saw you repost something about ouat I didn’t know you watch the show I am a big hook fan What you like about the show? (snow, charming and them are so boring huh? like that they support hook tho)

Hiya,

I only just recently watched Once Upon a Time for the first (second and third) time. And let me say, I am in love. It hits all my interests - literature appropriations, fairy tales, pretty boy actors who act with their eyes, Scotsmen and Irishmen and a cast who are friends outside of the show as well.

I love a story with good flashbacks and great transitions, and this show delivers. It also delivers on brilliantly appropriated fairy tales. This is the first time I've ever liked Snow White. I love that so many of the Red Riding Hood texts are engaged to create her character. There are so many beautiful and emotional storylines and interesting takes on characters. Any text where characterisation is favoured above plot is a win in my book and this show delivers in spades.

I will never get over how brilliant the casting is and how hard actors like Lana Parrilla worked to make the casting work in her favour. The choice of who plays a young version of Snow and Cora are exceptional. Robbie Kay is perfectly Peter Pan. The costumes are brilliant, especially Elsa's purple Frozen dress.

I love the parallels and callbacks in this show as well. They foreshadow and engage with information retrospectively brilliantly on Once. I love the extended family dynamics, the overall themes of hope and finding people, finding family.

I love Captain Hook too! I love his transformation from good to vengeful - for his brother, for Milah. I'm a sucker for anyone who can love that deeply, that loyally. And I love how hard he tries to return to the side of good, to disentangle the man from the legend of the fearsome pirate, and that while he may be a pirate he never completely lost his faith in "good form." (An episode I could discuss ad nauseum and not even for Captain Swan and Snowing feels but for the brotherhood of it all - that Hook and Charming are the replacements for the brother's they lost, that Hook lost and gained a brother to dreamshade, and that he was probably so scared that what happened to Liam would happen to David especially given that the last time the Jolly Roger flew he lost Liam in much the same way David is in peril). And that doesn't even broach the topic of how much I love Hook and Henry and their relationship over the course of the series. Or his relationship with Snow and how similar they are, how much she and Charming love him, both of which make me smile.

I do wish we had more information about Hook's backstory, in all honesty. Not just Hook, though, I suppose. It's probably the half-season storylines that mean we only get a snippet of the Darlings and Bae and a hug for a reunion but nothing more, a single moment of Tink being proud of Hook and Neal, that sort of thing, and I would have definitely loved more of that Neverland trio - especially because it was so important to Hook and Neal's characters. But then again, the old aphorism comes into play, "leave the audience wanting more."

I'm going to disagree with you on Snowing being boring, though. Although I can see why they may come across that way in the series that is so action-packed. But I don't think the action of domestic life is any less thrilling than the action of battle, and Snowing post-season four get a chance to have that settled down family life, "farm life" as Snow once called her dream for her future, after all the trials of tribulations they'd been through. There's a nobility in the simple life, of not being the cause or even part of the drama (much like Mondler, which is the way I would analogise this pairing given that those two get called "boring" or "uneventful" in much the same way despite living the domestic, quiet life) and Snow and Charming deserve a little bit of peace.

[abovethemists]

Don’t mind me, just thinking again what a missed opportunity it was that Milah wasn’t Captain Hook. 

Like imagine Rumple, fueled by rage, murders Killian Jones and chops off Milah’s hand before flitting away. We have Milah left, full of hate for her ex-husband who murdered her lover, maimed her, and also apparently lost their kid down a portal after becoming some evil Dark One who is so far removed from the sweet little man she was married to. 

And the Rumple/Hook feud always seemed so one sided. Like obviously Rumple didn’t like Hook, but he also never bothered him until Hook antagonized him first. He wasn’t out there consumed with getting rid of Hook it was just if he was there in his way he’d flick him aside. But if Captain Hook was Milah??? The rage, the pain, the anger, the broken dreams and shattered hopes. He loved her once. And it explains why an all powerful wizard doesn’t just kill a mere mortal. Because she’s his ex-wife and he loved her once. And she’s Bae’s mother. And no matter how she comes at him he can’t bring himself to kill her. And when Bae comes back??? And he finds out his parents have had this blood feud going for centuries? 

“You’re my oldest friend”.

It would make a better story is all I’m saying. 

[cosette141]

The Day that it Doesn't (OUAT fanfic)

Fandom: Once Upon A Time

Pairing: Captain Swan

Author: cosette141

Words: 2516

Summary: “You and I. We understand each other. Look out for yourself and you never get hurt.” “Worked out quite well for me.” “Yeah, until the day that it doesn’t.” Today, Hook learns, as he steers his ship away from shore with a horrible empty feeling in his chest, is that day. He decides to once and for all give up his crusade in order to be a part of something, and takes a moment to hope that Milah understands. CS

Link to AO3

a/n: I wrote this with the sole desire to see Killian let go of Milah. Obviously learning about Bae had heavily influenced his decision to turn his ship around, but I really wanted to strictly focus on Hook letting go of his crusade against Gold, and let go of Milah. So, I guess read this like an AU as if Hook hadn’t learned that Neal was Bae/etc. yet.

"We're doing this. It might be stupid, it might be crazy, but we're doing this."

Hook opened his fingers, the magic bean still sitting safely in his palm.

And here, standing at the helm of his ship, the sea air shifting black locks of his hair over his forehead, salt and the scents of the ocean all around, he couldn't help but flash back to the last time he's held a magic bean.

He could still feel Milah in his arms.

"I love you."

Something has choked him, something had prevented him from saying it back to her in time. His mind had been racing, trying to find a way to get her heart out of the demon's hand.

But he was too late.

She had died, and his last words to her should have been what hers were to him.

And that mistake had haunted him for centuries.

He could still feel the moment he knew she was gone. Could still feel her weight fall into his arms with a heaviness that was so final, so cold.

He hadn't been able to walk on that side of the ship for years.

And still, whenever he did, he could swear a chill slipped down his spine, as if he was walking through a ghost.

Every single time.

For over two hundred years.

Hook let out a breath, staring at the bean in his hand.

"There's one thing I care more about than my revenge, and it's my life."

Emma Swan and this town might be able to gamble with their lives on a fool's errand, but he was not about to take that bet. He didn't survive two hundred years in Neverland just to die a fiery death in an attempt to save the evil Queen who didn't deserve mercy.

It was the rarest of all rare chances that this bean would have done what they wanted it to. To use it to send the trigger somewhere else, to save their town. There was no guarantee it would work.

That, at least, is what he's been telling himself, the entire way from the strange-looking tavern to the docks.

That, at least, is what he's been forcing himself to believe, every time he imagined the look on Emma Swan's face when she realized what he had done.

She must know by now.

She must.

He was surprised when she didn't check the pouch at the tavern.

She didn't trust him on the Beanstalk.

But today, she had.

He would be remiss if he said that her abandoning him still didn't sting.

He had, on their short journey together, seen something in her that he hadn't seen in anyone in his entire life.

He'd seen himself.

It had been like looking into a bloody mirror.

How someone, from an entirely different realm, could be so much like him, he had no idea.

Her leaving him, tricking him, besting him had worn horribly on his pride. He'd never willingly admit it aloud, but it wore on more than just vanity.

Though it sounded quite petulant to admit it, his bloody feelings had been hurt.

Someone he'd known for such a short while, someone who he'd bonded with, somehow, more than with anyone he's met aside from Milah, had blatantly screwed him over.

She did not, however, leave him to die.

The blasted giant did let him go, unharmed.

Yet, he tried to remind himself, he hadn't exactly shown himself to be a trustworthy ally. He'd traded his trust from Cora to Emma Swan in half a second. It was only fair, aside from carrying a very untrustworthy reputation, that she couldn't trust him. And, quite honestly, Hook couldn't exactly deny that if Cora had offered him more help in getting to and killing the Dark One, that he would have changed allies once again. Besides that fact, Emma was on a desperate mission to return to a child. Trusting a pirate was more than a risk; even he could admit to that.

And the fact that Emma Swan had befriended one of the most fearsome creatures alive, a bloody giant, was yet another curiosity.

She felt familiar, she was quite easy on the eyes and she was intriguing.

"You and I. We understand each other."

And even now, after all that's happened, all the things he's done with her as witness, she still looked at him as if she knew him somehow. She didn't look at him like he was a villain. She looked at him like he was misunderstood, written in a language no one else could translate except her.

She had been right on point with her words to him, earlier.

She understood him.

No one has cared for him since Milah.

But no one in his entire bloody life has understood him like Emma Swan.

And it's that feeling, the one he'd felt when Emma had bested him the first time.

It was a spark of color in a world of black and white.

That feeling that had arisen once again when she'd shown him concern after he'd been injured.

And again, not moments ago, when he truly saw the understanding in her gaze, when he knew she saw past his ruthless demeanor; she saw him.

That feeling that crept up from inside, somewhere deep in his gut, a warmth that spread, touching his chest.

"You can be a part of something, or you can do what you do best, and be alone."

That look in her eyes.

It wasn't just convincing him to give her the bean.

She meant it.

If he accepted, if he joined her, she'd give him the chance she didn't on the beanstalk.

And that feeling in him, the one that's crept up so many times surrounding her presence, it clicked.

And in a rare moment of panic, he immediately made his choice.

That feeling rose again, now, at the thought of her.

The realization that she was to die.

It built and built. Stronger now than ever before. More adamant.

He shoved it down.

Tried to cling onto the numbness he's felt for the past two centuries.

Hook closed his fingers over the bean in his palm, took a breath and made the decision before that bloody feeling could change his mind.

He steered away from shore.

He let the ocean's silence fill the air.

That feeling nagged at him.

Louder.

But he had to do this.

It was a chance that would likely never happen again.

That trigger, or whatever it was, would kill the entire town.

Including Rumplestiltskin.

His Crocodile would be dead.

Finally.

Milah will be avenged.

After all these years, she can finally rest in peace.

He felt himself smile faintly. His eyes fell to the spot of his ship, where she had been taken from him. "You will be avenged, my love. At long last," he whispered.

But something still felt wrong.

The Crocodile was to die, Milah was to be avenged, but…

If he did this…

Emma Swan was to die as well.

That feeling rose up in him again, with so much vigor it stole his breath.

He shut his eyes, trying to rid himself of it.

For Milah.

For Milah.

His eyes opened.

It wouldn't leave him.

He felt sick.

He could still remember the land of New York City, they called it. When he had thought he killed Rumplestiltskin.

He had told the Tamara woman he was satiated.

He had lied.

There was a cold emptiness that had followed.

It was nothing like he had dreamed.

It felt like…

Nothing.

There was no victory.

There was no joy.

There was simply emptiness.

He'd meant the words he'd said to Regina, when she had contemplated avenging her own mother's murder.

"It isn't a beginning. It's an ending."

It didn't bring them back.

Killing Rumplestiltskin wouldn't bring Milah back.

Hook's need for revenge all these years had been his only purpose. His only reason for living.

When he had believed the Crocodile was dead…

He'd never truly thought about what life would be after his mission was complete.

It felt like nothing.

Worse than the numbness that had strangled his chest for the past two hundred years.

Milah was not here to embrace him, to smile, to tell him he made her proud. To tell him she loved him. She was not here, and never will return.

He was simply alone.

In every sense of the word.

He ditched his crew when he allied with Cora.

He'd been chasing his damn Crocodile his entire life, spanning centuries.

To lead to a feeling of cold nothing?

Learning that the Crocodile was not dead, however…

Afrer the initial anger because why wouldn't the bloody imp just die? Hook had felt an overwhelming exhaustion.

He didn't want to keep chasing after the Crocodile.

He didn't want to find a new way to kill him.

And he was not going back to Neverland to buy himself more time to find another way.

He loved Milah, would always love Milah. But he can't go back to Neverland.

Not even for her.

Hook let out a tortured breath.

The shore was far in the distance now.

He opened his palm.

Stared at the bean.

He was so bloody tired.

And right here, in his palm, he could save himself and live the rest of his days with the knowledge that the Crocodile is dead.

But Emma Swan would be as well.

His eyes shut.

He had the luxury, now, to know what killing the Crocodile felt like.

That cold, numb emptiness.

The rest of his days would be just that.

Alone.

Empty.

And the thought of Emma Swan perishing, at his hand and hook…

His eyes opened.

They were drawn to the deck, where Milah had died.

He shut his eyes.

He knew what that feeling was, the feeling that rose inside him at every thought of Emma Swan.

It was just a feeling.

It was feelings.

He had feelings for her.

However faint they were.

And the realization came in that tavern, when he had seen the understanding in her eyes that matched her words and it spurred him into running.

Becuase he loved Milah.

Milah.

He had promised to love only her, to avenge her, and cherish her memory for the rest of his life.

It felt like his heart was betraying both him and Milah.

But to feel something for another woman, someone alive…

It felt…

It felt like he was alive for the first time in centuries. Like he had died when Milah had, and he felt revived. Emma Swan was apparently some savior and he couldn't deny that. This feeling she gives him…

It felt good.

Which only made his guilt burn hotter, and that sick feeling returned.

His eyes opened, a tortured look in the blue, as he stared at the deck where he lost his first love.

"You can be a part of something."

Hook shut his eyes for a long moment.

"Look out for yourself and you don't get hurt. Right?"

"Worked out quite well for me."

"Until the day that it doesn't."

How did she bloody know him?

The pain in her eyes was the pain he felt in his heart.

She had lost nearly as much, nearly more, than he has.

Hook let out a shuddering breath.

"Until the day that it doesn't."

Why did today feel like that day?

Hook released his crushing grip on the wheel with effort, as if his body was resisting his heart's attempt to change his mind.

But his fingers loosened.

He let go.

He felt himself walk away from the helm.

Hook walked slowly down the stairs, to the forbidden spot on the deck.

He hesitated before it.

He almost never stood here.

He could feel it.

The chill sweeping down his spine.

The feel of her lifeless body in his arms.

Taking a hollow breath, Hook knelt.

Touched the wood gently, seeing her clearly in his mind's eye, in her last moments.

His eyes stung.

"Milah," he whispered. His eyes shut. "Milah, my love," he managed, voice choked. "I—" He swallowed. Two hundred years worth of pain, of aged words carved out of his voice. "I promised I would avenge you. Bloody hell, if I do this, I can." His voice cracked. He took a breath. "Alas…" He lifted his head, looking back toward the shore. "If I keep my vow to you," he whispered, "If I…" His voice caught. "If I do this, I'm not sure I could… live with myself." A tear slipped down his cheek. That sick feeling returned. The guilt. And a horrible loneliness that he's felt for far too long. "Milah," he said brokenly, "I miss you."

The wind buffeted the sails gently, birds cawing above.

But she didn't reply, and neither did her ghost.

Hook drew a breath.

And he made his choice.

"Forgive me for failing you, my love," he said softly, heavily, to the deck, to her ghost, the one he walked through day after day after day. "Please forgive me." Another tear slipped down his cheek.

Suddenly, Emma's face slipped into his mind.

Her smile, after she had defeated the giant, after she found the compass and helped him out of the debris.

That feeling—those feelings—for her touched him once again. They felt warm. Milah's memory always left him feeling so cold.

Hook felt his hand holding the bean shake.

Another tear fell, striking the deck where Milah had gone.

"Please, forgive me," he whispered, he pleaded, another tear striking the wood. "I just… I don't want to be alone any longer," his voice cracked. "I can't."

The air was as silent as her ghost.

He bowed his head, brushing his thumb over the wood, where her hand had fallen in her death so many years ago.

"I will always love you," he whispered.

His eyes shut.

And suddenly, he felt the gust of a warm wind blow through him.

But looking up, none of the sails reacted.

He blinked, staring at the deck.

The chill that had been lingering along his spine had vanished.

A tender warmth touched him instead. Something that distinctly reminded him of Milah's fingers brushing across his skin, a touch he's very nearly forgotten.

He smiled, tears stinging his eyes. He touched the sensation over his cheek, shutting his eyes. "Milah," he said softly, smiling something tender and broken. A tear fell. "Thank you," he whispered, eyes burning, feeling warmth flood him, feeling a relief that would have brought him to his knees if he wasn't already. "Rest, my love," he said softly.

The feeling of her touch lingered for a moment, before it gently faded into the wind.

Hook opened his eyes, feeling like something that had been shattered within him suddenly began to heal.

He smiled.

And he stood.

Newfound vigor, newfound purpose, he rushed to the helm. He spun the wheel sharply, turning the ship around.

"You can be a part of something."

He smiled.

And he intended to do just that.

[themattress]

Inspired by this post, I wanted to reiterate a view I’ve long held.

Redemption at its core is a three-step process: feel remorse for the wrong you’ve done, commit to stop doing wrong, and commit to start doing right. And while it’s mostly possible for any villainous character to do this, the question is whether it’s plausible based on how the villainous character is established and written...and if it’s plausible, would it still make sense if they don’t do it? Once Upon a Time’s redeemed mainstay villains provide great examples: 

Regina and Zelena - NOT PLAUSIBLE.

Whether you like these characters and their redemptions or not, the fact is that the writers royally fucked up when it came to establishing them in their debut story arcs. Regina was established as a warped psychopath who is willing to kill her own father to enact a horrible curse that will grant her total control over the eternally miserable population of an entire realm solely because she irrationally blames a child for her boyfriend’s death and can’t feel happy unless said child, now grown-up, is “punished”. The only hint at a possible redemption was her love for her adopted son Henry, and even that eventually went out the window in the following story arc where a brief attempted redemption was followed by her being even worse than she was before in both flashbacks and the present day! Zelena, meanwhile, had power in Oz and could have had it good there, but she was so obsessively jealous of the sister she’d never met and lustful over their mutual magic teacher that she would uproot time itself just to ensure Regina was never born and that she would be the one to cast the Dark Curse for Rumple; still not explaining how she’d get around the whole “she’d have to crush his heart to do it” factor which was why Rumple rejected her in favor of Regina in the first place. Oh, and both of these ladies are straight-up rapists, with Regina even murdering her rape victim.

So the problem with the Mills Sisters and their redemption is that it is totally dependent on them just...changing their established characters on a dime. In Season 3 and Season 5 respectively, they’re still not good people at the start but are suddenly psychologically stable and totally fine with working with the good guys in pursuit of a mutual goal. This makes them plausibly redeemable, but it also makes them wildly different characters than they were previously shown to be. The trick worked on many viewers, but it also failed on many others, or it worked in regards to one of them but not in regards to the other. For my money, I find redeemed Zelena to be more tolerable since didn’t backtrack as much nor was she rewarded for her redemption far beyond what she deserved, but both her and Regina were not the kinds of characters who could feasibly be redeemed in their initial two seasonal story arcs.

Rumpelstiltskin - PLAUSIBLE, BUT UNLIKELY.

From the beginning, many people said that contrary to Regina, Rumple was established in Season 1 as a character who would plausibly be redeemed. His backstory, certain character traits, and motivation for his role in the Dark Curse certainly made him more appealing than Regina. However, I never felt that plausibility meant that it was likely with Rumple. The whole point of his character seemed to be that yes, he could be a better man than he is, but he actively chooses not to be because he’s a selfish, power-hungry coward. And he was one even as a struggling peasant and single father, something he flat-out admits. Many people point to his desire to find his son and make amends with him as altruistic, but it really isn’t, especially when not only is he willing to do horrible things (the same kind of horrible things that drove his son away to begin with) to make it happen just to alleviate his own guilt, but he isn’t willing to achieve this goal without also working in a means for him to keep his power, which was what the whole True Love Potion thing was about. The best that Rumple could ever hope for was a Redemption Equals Death rather than a living, continuous redemption.

Oh, yeah. That happened.

Captain Hook - PLAUSIBLE AND LIKELY.

Killian Jones, aka Captain Hook, was introduced as a pirate with an honor code who then had his lover murdered in front of him and his hand chopped off for good measure. This drove him to become a ruthless, dishonorable seeker of vengeance, willing to stop at nothing to get what he wants and caring for no-one and nothing else. And the more we see of him, the more apparent it becomes that there is a deep well of self-loathing underneath the surface: it’s because he believes he’s a wretch doomed to both an unhappy life and an unhappy afterlife that he is able to shut off his conscience and honor and positive emotions. In his depressed, nihilistic worldview, nothing matters except getting his revenge and then dying to suffer the consequences of all the wrongs he’s committed in pursuit of it. And that perfectly sets up the question of what would happen if that worldview was challenged, and if he realized that happiness and salvation were still possible and that seeking revenge is what’s keeping him miserable? Answer: he’d feel remorse, stop doing evil, and commit himself to doing good.

Hook’s redemption is plausible and sensible because unlike the Mills Sisters, the object of his revenge is someone who actually wronged him, and the hurting of other people caught in the crossfire stems from a place of misery and self-loathing rather than from a sadistic sense of satisfaction from hurting others. And unlike Rumple, his redemption is likely because he’s not a coward, and his ruthless selfishness is a flaw we see him develop and can thus believe he can un-develop too rather than being a central component of his character from the start. Rumple stans point to him bullying peasant Rumple when the latter is pleading for his wife back in his formal introductory scene, which ignores that he gives Rumple the chance to fight honorably, doesn’t hurt him when he refuses and allows him to leave his ship totally unscathed, and later admits that if Rumple had just fought him he’d have let him talk it out with Milah. Him being kind of a jerk about it is because he’s a freaking pirate captain, it’s part of the job description. Hook is hands-down the least evil of the mainstay villains, and him joining the good guys and becoming the heroine’s love interest was an organic development.

[ohmightydevviepuu]

the last test and proof / part four

oh hey hai guess what we’re still here celebrating @profdanglaisstuff.   A VERY MERRY UNBIRTHDAY, etc.  ❤

@katie-dub and @thisonesatellite again deserve thanks for their insights, as ever.  @shireness-says and the NO!  CURSE!  RENAISSANCE!!

part one | part two | part three | AO3

Things Emma and Hook Haven’t Talked About Yet:

1 - Neal 2 - The time she’d left him with a giant 3 - The time he’d left her in a cell 4 - Milah 5 - True. Love’s. Kiss.

The time he left her in a cell.

Okay, but.

Hook had left her. He’d left her, locked her in a cell and she could still hear the malice in his voice, the way it dripped from every letter, from every syllable. Emma closed her eyes and could hear it, the bite and the anger when he said, The time for that is done.

When Emma looked into his eyes and understood exactly what her mistake might cost her.

Just as I am done with you.

She rolled over, the sheet slipping away from her in the bed that wasn’t hers, sunlight streaming in through the open curtains, and waited. She waited for that feeling, that feeling in the pit of her stomach that always told her to run--but there was only the feeling she got when she thought she’d have to leave, like she was missing something. Home.

Emma got up from the bed and looked for her jeans on the floor, her jeans and her shirt and her underwear, and thought again about the qualities of a werewolf’s hearing because she was in one of the rooms at the B&B, the room that--apparently--Granny had given to Killian so he could “use the facilities” or whatever, like Emma even believed that.

Granny had a crush and Granny liked to look and Granny totally had a plan and they had played right into it which was fine. Great, even. Orgasm(s) and Feelings and she had kissed him and she hadn’t made out with someone like that since--ever, god, just lying there and feeling the other person against her as the kisses went from sweet to sexy and back again, her heart pounding as his eyelashes brushed against her cheeks and she felt the softness of his hair in her fingers.

Killian was gone but there was a note on the table with a little swan drawn at the top and the words i’ll return soon, please stay as long as you like and a little hook drawn underneath and next to the note was a cup of coffee mixed with exactly the right sugar-to-coffee ratio and a generous splash of milk. It was still hot.

Neal had never learned how she took her coffee.

Speak of the devil: Neal was in the diner, in a booth with their son and a plate of French fries between them. Emma watched them and couldn’t stop herself imagining the same scene playing out with Killian at the table, probably teaching Henry how to cheat at dice or poker or whatever games pirates played when they gambled. She couldn’t stop herself imagining another version of the scene, between Hook and Baelfire on the decks of the Jolly Roger where he’d apparently stayed for a time in Neverland.

Teaching him to fight with a cutlass that sat in his cabin some two hundred years later.

Neither of them ever talked about it, but Hook had taught Neal to sail and to play cards and to pick locks, never break in without a plan to break out and all of that; Hook had cared for him, maybe even loved him. Knew him well enough to decipher the drawings on the cave wall, port and starboard and a hook and an abandoned accounting of time when all hope was lost. Only that last one Killian knew the same way Emma knew, from painful personal experience. The look you get when you’ve been left alone.

They were--all of them--sentimental; Killian with the cutlass and Baelfire with his scrawled memories and Emma with the weight of an old keychain around her neck like an albatross.

They were, all of them, Lost Ones.

Emma slid into the booth next to Henry and grabbed a fry. (Wondered if Killian knew she preferred onion rings.) Met Neal’s look as it shifted from a smile to something less pleasant--yes, Neal, sex hair was a thing, too bad they so rarely got to do it in a real bed with so many orgasms; Emma smirked and raised her eyebrow.

Henry, smart kid that he was, excused himself to go to the counter and sit with Ruby, climbing over the divider in his haste to escape.

“Jesus, Em,” Neal muttered.

“Don’t be a dick, Neal,” Emma snapped.

“Fine,” he said. “Fine, how about I just break into your room and--”

“I was right about her.”

“That doesn’t make it okay,” Neal said.

“None of this is okay,” Emma said. “You showing up here acting like Henry’s father--”

“I am Henry’s father!”

“Do you even care at all about me, what it’s like for me having you here, the mess it’s making with Regina--”

“So the Evil Queen gets a say?”

“She’s his mother,” Emma said, exasperated. “He loves her.”

“And Hook? You don’t know what I know about him.”

“So tell me. Tell me what happened.”

Neal ran his hand through his hair and looked around and said, “Emma, he killed my mother.”

Emma’s response was immediate. “No, he didn’t.”

“As good as--he might as well have torn her heart out himself!”

“Seriously?”

“He wanted to kill my father,” Neal said. “He tore my family apart.”

“Neal.” Emma tipped her head to the side. “You know that’s not true. Your family--they were a disaster. They left you. Both of them. You told me that.”

“So that’s how it is now,” Neal said. “A good screw and you’re just--”

“Fuck you, Neal.”

“--is that what he told you, now you’re just making excuses for what he did, apologizing for him after--”

“Wait, what?”

“Come on, Emma, you know he tried to pull this with me the other day. He wanted to talk. About his regrets or some bullshit. You know I wished we could have been a family, Bae.” Neal rolled his eyes and suddenly Emma knew exactly what happened.

Not on the Jolly Roger. Only Neal and Killian would ever truly know that, but--in the cells.

And, well, maybe on the Jolly Roger. Because this--this was what Neal did: he lashed out, he pushed, he blamed everyone but himself. It’s what she did, too, and once upon a time it had been something they’d had in common, that fuck-the-world mentality.

And Killian--he’d pushed back. Let his anger overtake him, because that’s what he did, that’s how he coped, how he covered up his hurt and his pride and that’s what she’d seen in his eyes when he’d looked at her all just as I am done with you.

Disappointment.

And it was so easy, wasn’t it, to play down to expectations; Hook left her because she left him and now--

“Neal,” she said. “I can’t live in the past anymore.”

“You’re never going to forgive me, are you?”

“No. I’m not.” Emma shrugged. “The time for that--it’s done. You know that. I want to stop running.”

“You think Captain Hook is going to stay here, with you?”

She did. She believed.

The door opened and every head in the diner turned.

Not Emma’s. She didn’t look away from Neal, couldn’t, really, not before she said this: “No, Neal. I believe that Killian Jones is going to stay here. With me.”

And then she turned and the fry in her hand dropped onto the plate and her mouth fell open because Killlian-fucking-Jones had just walked into the diner like he’d stepped off of the pages of, like, GQ or something--in perfectly-fitted blue jeans and black boots and a red partially-unbuttoned Henley under a black vest and a black leather blazer.

A leather blazer.

And Emma didn’t miss the coat at all because--that view, it deserved to be on display. Wow. Did it ever. Granny was gonna break her neck, seriously.

Killian Jones walked in, not Captain Hook, and Tink trailed in behind him clutching a bag in her hand and looked around and saw Emma and winked and waved and gave her a smile, all, It’s good, right and fuck, yeah. It was. Killian turned back to Tink and followed the direction she was looking and saw her with Neal and Emma didn’t even think.

She left the French fry on its plate and stood up and walked straight over to him and this part would get easier, right? They’d figure out the routine and the comfort level but right now she just wanted to touch him, to let him know that she was there.

She understood.

She’d already known but now he was there in the clothes and she understood.

“Hello, beautiful,” she said and watched the smile blossom on his face.

Killian Jones was going to stay here. With her.

--

@optomisticgirl @spartanguard @kmomof4 @stahlop @carpedzem @karl0ta @captain-emmajones @mariakov81 @therealstartraveller776 @klynn-stormz @withaheartfulloflove @gingerchangeling​ @scientificapricot​

[killiansprincss]

Never Forget You ch.12

Summary: Season 6A Canon Divergence.Emma is happy. Finally happy with her parents, son and boyfriend. But this happiness is taken away from her when the Evil Queen curses her and turns her into a toddler.Heartbroken and angry, Killian and Henry run away to Neverland to wait for Emma to break her curse.

But when she does break it and comes looking for them 25 years later, she soon realises this Neverland is very different now it is no longer under Pans rule. Will she be able to save Henry and Killian in time, or will this new ruler of Neverland keep them hostage forever?

So I’m around halfway through with this fic now which to me is amazing as I’ve never written a fic with so many chapters so it’s really special to me. I hope you enjoy this next chapter and let me know what you think!

Find on A03

Killian headed back to his ship in an attempt to cool down after his argument with Emma and talk with Henry.

“Mom?” Henry asks as he comes down the stairs, Emma still with her father.

Getting up off the floor, David just says, “I shall leave you two to talk.”

“What’s up kid?” Emma asks as Heney plops down beside her.

“I don’t like that you and Killian are fighting.”  Henry comments with a slight sad tone.

“We’re not arguing.” She lies.

Henry just rolls his eyes, “Oh please. We all heard get into an argument over going home.”

“Okay. So we were arguing. You’ve been with him for 25 years, what’s his plan? Why doesn’t he want to come home?”

Avoiding his mother's eye contact, he looks down at his feet. “I think you need to talk to him about that.”

“Henry please. I have not seen you or Killian in 25 years. When I woke up from my curse, the day I remembered, I cried so hard because I love you both so much.  I’ve not been your mother. I forgot about you. What kind of mother forgets her own child?” Emma sniffles, “Please. Tell me what to do so we can go home.”

“He’s not the same. Killian. He’s not been the same for a while.”

Emma’s heart drops. “Why? What can i do?”

Henry shrugs. “I don’t know if you can do anything, it’s not like we have therapy here in Neverland. He’s hurting, he lost you. It’s like when you lost him, before you decided to go to the Underworld and you were in a really dark place. Now he’s in a dark place and Neverland isn’t like Storybrooke, especially for him. Neverland, he says it’s the worst realm of all.”

Emma nods. She had lost Killian more times than she wished to. She lost him the first time in the alternate reality it hurt like hell, especially as she was too scared to tell him how she felt and it was suddenly too late.

When Henry returned them to Storybrooke and the few split seconds before she saw his face before the darkness took her, she felt sick at the thought of losing him forever. Then in Camelot, she has finally allowed herself to envision a future with him, she almost lost him again.

She did everything in her power to save him, unlocking every bit of dark magic she had. But it was no good as she lost him for good and wasn’t able to save him. It broke her, she didn’t know how she was going to continue, she couldn’t bear to live in the house he chose without him.

She lost him one last time in the Underworld, but they had come so close to their white picket fence. Going up the elevator shaft alone was the worst thing she ever experienced, seeing him below and not next to her, if it wasn’t for the fact she needed to make sure her family got back home safely, she would’ve broken down there and then.

Thankfully that was the final time she lost him, her soulmate then returned to her a few days later. But then they got a mere few months together until he lost her.

Fate was cruel.

_____

_____

On his first trip to Neverland, Killiian Jones was cursed with memories of Liam and Milah.

And now he was cursed with memories of Emma. They were playing in his head, over and over. Reminders of their times together when they were happy. And the awful times where they lost one another.

Killian is back in the Underworld. The bastard fiery hell he can’t escape from. Hades throne room. He’s beaten and bruised because Hades has taken a particular dislike to him.

He can feel Emma’s prescene. He knows she’s here, He can feel it. He hopes she can’t feel his pain, the way he feels her worry.  He can hear her yelling for him, wanting to know where he is. But Hades drained almost all the energy from him that he can’t even say hello.

Why did she come to rescue him? It’s far too dangerous. He didn’t deserve rescuing, he was a Dark One and he made Emma feel awful. He crushed Merlin's heart. He wasn’t the man he used to be. The man Emma fell in love with.

He refuses to write any names on the gravestones. He wouldn’t do that. Part of him still couldn’t believe they all came down here for him, Emma was a stubborn lass, but her family weren’t always so approving of their relationship-especially Dave. The fact they were even here was beyond belief. Hades can torture him all he likes, Killian Jones is still a man of honour. He will not write any names cursing them to the same hell he is in.

He ignores the beating and the torture. He can take that. But now he’s in chains. Above the river of Lost Souls. The moment the chains lower him into the water, he’s gone forever. Maybe that’s best. Then Emma and her family can leave and she can move on. He doesn’t deserve her. She’s too good for him.  He doesn’t deserve her.

But that doesn’t happen. He sees her blonde hair and red jacket in the corner of his bloodied eye.

“Killian.”

He hears her voice loud and clear. It’s music. She doesn’t give up. She crosses the traps easily and rescues him before he dips into the river. The way she says his name. Killian. His name, not his moniker. Not the name everyone associates with him. No. She sees the man beyond the Hook. She’s the only woman who has seen him that way.

“I told you to let me go.” He tells her.

“I never listen.” She says with a smirk. Gods this woman was amazing.

“You’re impossible.” He manages to say.

“And you love me for it.” Damn right he does. He was still getting used to this century, the one she’s from. The woman is no longer the one who needs rescuing, she’s the one who does the saving. This modern world may be confusing, but his Emma is so strong and he does love her for it.

For a short while Killian actually believes they’re getting out alive. That he will be able to go back with her.

Heart share.

He had heard the story, how her parents managed it.

It was possible.

But that was them. Snow White and Prince Charming.

Would it be possible for Emma and himself?

Gods he loved her. More than anything. He gave up the chance at finding peace with his brother for her. The brother he hadn’t seen in centuries.

But a heart share, it would require true love. Magic that is so powerful. A bond so strong nothing else matters. Could they have it?

And then it didn’t work.

Not because they weren’t true love. But because he was dead.

The Ambrosia. Orpheus and Eurydice.

It would allow him to walk out of the Underworld freely.

But there was a test in the way.

Weighing Emma’s heart. To test if they were true love.

Emma could only admit her true feelings when they were in grave danger or about to die, or both. And that’s why he feared they weren’t true love. He understood though, she had been hurt by Baelfire or Neal rather. She was afraid to open up her heart. He never pushed. He knew, even before she said the words how she felt about him. He would never have said it before she did, he didn’t want to scare her away. Not when she finally trusted him and was letting him in slowly.

Emma puts her heart on the pedestal to weigh it. And when it doesn’t move, his heart drops. It didn’t work, they’re not true love.

Until Emma falls on the floor in pain.

“Get my heart.” She tells him clutching where her heart should be.

When he reaches to grab it, he’s on fire. Literal fire. It burns.

He tells Emma to grab her heart. Worry about him later.

But she doesn’t.

As weak as she is without her heart in her chest, she takes all the energy she has and throws herself onto him, ceasing the fire.

And the doors open.

“It’s true love.”

He didn’t want to believe it. But true love, the most powerful magic of all. He was lucky enough to share it with Emma Swan.

If they weren’t on the hunt for ambrosia the things he would do to her.

True Love. Captain Hook, the villain had found true love, with the saviour, a hero no doubt. Except Emma didn’t see him that way. To everyone else, he was Captain Hook. To Emma, he was Killian Jones.

This next memory was the worst of all. When they found out the ambrosia was no more. Another one of Hades cruel tricks. It was then that he realised he wasn’t going home to Storybrooke. He had to stay here. He had to try and find peace. Without Emma. Maybe he would be reunited with his brother.

He had thoughts about finding peace, before Emma came to save him. But she was so headstrong he had only allowed himself to believe they were all going home. But now, he hoped he would land himself in a better place.

As much as it pained him to lose Emma, for her to go on without him. It was for the best. Fate was cruel, but he was glad to have found Emma.

His true love.

After Liam died, it broke him. He’d lost the only person who ever loved him. He thought he would sail the seas freely as a pirate, having women warm his bed, but never going further than that. Then he met Milah, and she ran away with him. They were going to see the world. She promised him they would go back for her son, for Bae, and they could have a family. And then the unthinkable happened. He lost her like he lost Liam.

And he went back to being a pirate, women warming his bed. He believed he would never find love again. Then a few centuries later, he met Emma Swan. She was unlike any woman he had met before, he was enchanted by her. His usual charms didn’t work on her, but there was something about her that told him to keep going. Looking back, it was the true love bond, but of course he didn’t know it at the time. And so he kept pushing and pushing, and she let him in piece by piece until she finally gave him her heart.

With Emma, she was so different to Milah. She was grounded, she would never leave her son behind. As much as she sometimes wanted to run away, she would never leave Storybrooke. With Emma, he had the prospect of a family, a real family with her son.

He loved her. More than anything.

Even though their time together was cut short, he was glad to even have that time with his true love. She saw past the pirate, past the villain which is more than any other woman had done before. He had changed, he wanted to become a better person, not just to win Emma’s heart (not that she was a prize to be won), but to be a better man overall. A man that he once was, a man his brother would be proud of.

He had found his true love and they had spent as much time together as they could. That’s all he could’ve wanted in life. Emma Swan. The true love of Killian Jones. Who would’ve believed.

That’s why saying goodbye was so hard. He had accepted his fate, but Emma not so much.

Seeing her go up in the elevator shaft instead of going up with her was the hardest thing ever. He held onto her hand until the very last moment, trying to remember what she felt like. He kissed her hand as tears rolled down both their faces, wanting to savour this moment. It was only a few seconds but it felt like a hundred years, this was the last time he would ever see Emma Swan. His true love.

This was the moment that played in his head every single time he closed his eyes. It was the worst moment. He avoided sleep because he didn’t want to be reminded of that moment. And when he was awake he would use rum as a viable solitude to stop thinking about her. Even the happy moments bring no joy into his life, because they are reminders, reminders of what he lost. He doesn’t know if she will ever come back for him, or if he’s lived a thousand years on this damned Island and she forgot about him, never broke her curse and died without ever remembering the man she once loved.

He thinks back to his confession in the Echo Caves. Kissing Emma for the first time revealed so much. He was flirting as he always did, he never expected her to actually kiss him, but she did. Everything seemed to click into place, he could imagine a future, he wanted to spend all his time with Emma, getting to know her and letting her know all of his secrets and fears.

300 years he had lived, and his heart had been broken many times over those years. He never thought his heart could be mended, that was until he met Emma Swan. He was a broken man, and slowly he was mending, but he had no doubt that he wanted every piece of his heart to belong to Emma Swan.

She was his future.

[official-wayward-noctis]

Captain Swan Bingo - Pirate Emma

A Pirate's Life for Me

Emma was raised by Pirates after being kidnapped now she has been challenged by a legendary pirate and she is going to prove she is better than him.

Ao3 Link here

Regina decided not to cast her dark curse but she did something much worse to the Charmings. The night that Emma was born, she disappeared only hours after being born. Emma was taken in the night away from her parents and brought to a ship. Regina paid the pirates nicely that took in Emma as she sailed away from the kingdom never to be seen again. Regina had slipped away after that and not much longer did she meet the man she ended up falling in love with and helping to raise his son who became like a son to her.

~

Twenty-Eight years later

Killian had heard tales of a pirate who had traveled the seas and had taken over the seas for the most part. Many feared this pirate from the tales he had heard. Killian had gotten caught in Neverland again and he knew that it had been twenty-eight years but it was as if no time had passed for him. He didn’t know much but he had heard stories about the pirate who had taken from so many and would do anything it seemed. Killian wants to meet this pirate and prove that he was the better pirate.

“I have heard tales of Captain Swan,” Killian told a boy who was at the docks with supplies.

“Then you best run along,” the boy said.

“What is your name?” Killian asked.

“Henry,” the boy said. “I just work for a local sailor.” Killian was intrigued by the boy.

“Are your parents not around?” Killian asked him.

“My papa didn’t know he had a son and my mom is a sailor,” Henry told him. Henry reminded him of Baelfire. He never forgot the boy even if he felt bad about what he did to the boy.

“Henry,” a woman said. Killian hadn’t fallen for someone in a long time but this woman caught his eyes immediately.

“Sorry, Mom,” Henry said, going over to her. The woman looked at him curious.

“Need something?” she asked him curiously.

“I was just asking your boy if he heard of the pirate named Captain Swan,” Killian said.

“If he had, he would know not to talk about it like everyone else in this kingdom,” she told Killian informing him of something he should know in her opinion.

“I’m sorry to talk with your son, I just wanted to speak with this other pirate,” Killian said.

“Look Pirate boy, I have a son and crew to get out of here in a bit but if you want to chat with the locals about a pirate instead of sailing out to the sea where every pirate is,” the woman suggested. Killian didn’t know what to say to that as he watched her leave with her boy. He didn’t think he would see her again.

~

Emma watched the other pirate as they left the docks. She knew that Captain Hook was interested in her but she didn’t need to show she was the better pirate when she knew she was. Though knowing she was being challenged had made her want to face this pirate in a different sense. She first had to find his ship though. Once she found it she could steal his ship. The Jolly Roger was the fastest ship in the seas and if Emma could steal the ship from under Hook’s nose she would be the best pirate out there. No pirate would doubt her.

“It’s risky,” one of her mates said. She didn’t care. She was going to steal the ship and prove she was the better pirate than any man.

“We will do it because we can do it,” Emma told them as she told them her plan. A plan that was going to work.

~

Killian was walking to his ship when he saw Emma again looking around for someone. Most likely her boy, Henry.

“Is the boy lost?” Killian asked her.

“He ran off to play on the docks and I haven’t seen him since,” Emma told Killian.

“Well we can look for him. He actually reminds me of a boy I once knew,” Killian said.

“His good heart is from his father, Baelfire,” Emma said. Killian felt himself pale a bit. Baelfire was the boy’s father. “He doesn’t know about his son though. I couldn’t risk him knowing and wanting to leave this realm for another. His father took so much from him and for him to finally have been free of this realm only to return, I knew I couldn’t hold him here.”

“He seems to have a good heart,” Killian said.

“I wish he had gotten that from me but all he got from me was a talent at stealing stuff,” Emma said before she turned to him. “I was raised by pirates and now he is as well.”

“Your parents were pirates?” Killian asked.

“I actually never knew my parents. All I know is that the pirate that raised me was given money to take me away. Instead they learned that as I grew up I was an advantage. Everyone had a sweet spot for a child. A child could slip through and grab what they wanted. Something Henry has learned as well.” Emma didn’t seem affected by the question.

“You are letting me know a lot about your life,” Killian said.

“It gives you some sympathy for me in a way doesn’t it?” Emma asked. Killian looked at her confused. “You want to feel sorry for me more than you want to kiss me right now. I saw the way you looked at me when we met.”

“You remind me of the woman I lost,” Killian said. Emma nodded but didn’t say anything as she turned to look for something. She seemed to sigh.

“He must have gone back to my ship,” Emma told Killian. Killian nodded as he followed her back to her ship. It wasn’t a bad ship. She seemed to look around as he looked out into the sea.

“He isn’t here either. I swear when I find him he is going to regret not being where he was supposed to be,” Emma said, annoyed by her son being missing. Emma looked at Killian who was still admiring her ship.

“You know he is lucky to be raised at sea,” Killian told her.

“Better than the forest. Who knows what is in those woods. At least at sea the most you deal with is merpeople,” Emma said. Killian knew that was true. There were other things but mostly it was just the merpeople or other pirates.

“It must be hard being the captain of this vessel,” Killian said.

“How would you know if I was the captain?” Emma asked him.

“I asked around about Captain Swan so more after we met and the stories I heard were different from the tales others told of a brave pirate woman who actually stole from those who hurt others. You don’t take from kingdoms that are benevolent in your mind,” Killian told her.

“I learned that if you want to survive, you need allies. I found many here through being loyal to those who have benevolent hearts,” Emma said.

“I heard a rumor that you may be a lost princess,” Killian told her.

“It is just a rumor.” Killian moved closer before he leaned in close.

“Is it also a rumor that your son is the grandson of the dark one?” Killian’s question surprised her.

“What do you mean?”

“Baelfire’s father is the dark one,” Killian informed her. Emma seemed surprised by this news as she looked out to the sea. “Baelfire never told you about his father or why he wanted to leave the Enchanted Forest.”

“He only told me his past was one that no one deserved,” Emma told him. Killian pulled her close.

“I knew Baelfire’s mother. She was killed by his father. Now I hurt Baelfire and I will do anything to make sure that Henry is found. I owe it to Baelfire for the crimes I did to him when he was in my care.” Emma knew he was speaking the truth. She couldn’t push him away when he only cared for the boy.

“You care a lot for my son,” Emma said.

“He reminds me of Baelfire, who reminds me of Milah, Baelfire’s mother. We were close before the dark one killed her,” Killian told Emma. Emma seemed to be thinking before she turned.

“I think I know where my son is,” Emma said. Killian seemed to smile as they hurried to where his ship was. On his ship sat Henry as if he was waiting for something. Emma turned to Killian before pulling him into a hug thanking him. Killian allowed the contact to enjoy it until he felt something hit him and he was knocked to the ground as Emma ran to the ship as his ship sailed away.

“See you around, Captain Hook,” Emma said. Killian smiled knowing he would have fun chasing that woman and getting his boat back from her.

[searchingwardrobes]

The Early Leaf’s a Flower: 10/11

Here’s another M rated chapter, and this time for a more enjoyable reason :) In addition to sexy times, there are a lot of revelations in this chapter. I can’t believe we are almost to the end! You all have been so supportive of this story, especially those of you who were fans of the original. Thank you for trusting me and sticking with this new version!

Thank you once again to the mods of the @captainswanbigbang for hosting the Captain Swan Rewrite a Thon. Also massive thanks to my betas @shippingtheswann and @optimisticgirl. I also owe a lot to all of my fellow writers in the discord chats for your conversations about creating my own version of Neverland and the other realms.

Summary: She saw eyes that were the blue of the forget me not peering at her through the cracked door of the wardrobe. He saw hair as gold as the buttercups. Why does the wardrobe keep bringing them back to one another, if fate keeps tearing them apart? Or maybe fate has her reasons …

Rating: M for sexy times, violence, canonical character death, and attempted rape

Trigger warnings: vague references to child abuse (physical and sexual), violence, and positive Millian

Words: About 5k in this chapter

** Complete and updated every Monday** Also on Ao3

Chapter Ten: No Lovelier Sight

Killian stands behind the wheel, the biting air here above the clouds cutting across his cheeks. Above him, the pegasus sail snaps in the breeze as they make their way to Neverland. Below him, Emma stands looking out at the blue sky and wispy clouds, her hair flying around her like an enchantress. Milah’s old skirts billow around her as well, the bottom hem only hitting the top of her boots. After all, their former owner was but seventeen when she died, and Emma is a woman of twenty-three.

He had sat upon the edge of his cot earlier after retrieving Milah’s things from her old trunk, Emma next to him, and told her more about the girl they had once belonged to as well as what she had meant to him. He doesn’t plan on hiding anything from Emma, especially not when she walked away from the only realm that has ever been her home.

Yet Emma had barely reacted to his story, simply staring straight ahead, her occasional nods the only sign that she was listening at all. She hasn’t spoken much at all since he told her about Henry.

“Starkey,” Killian calls, “can you take over?”

“Of course sir,” his first mate answers, handing the sextant over to Curly.

With the ship in capable hands, Killian moves to the lower deck and slowly approaches Emma. She turns to him, managing a trembling smile as she pushes her hair out of her eyes.

“The air is thin and cold at this altitude,” Killian says, “are you sure you don’t want my coat?”

She shakes her head. “I don’t feel it,” she tells him softly, “I don’t feel anything.”

He isn’t sure what comfort she needs from him, but he opens his arms for her. Emma comes willingly, pressing her face to his collarbone and grasping him tightly about the waist. She shudders, and he wraps his arms around her.

“You’ve had a lot to process in a very short amount of time,” he tells her soothingly as he rubs her back gently. “First your attack, and then the news about your son . . . “

“I just don’t understand,” Emma mumbles against his chest. “He was a newborn baby. A woman was adopting him. A woman with a nice home in a nice little town.”

“I don’t know, love,” Killian sighs, wishing he could help her more. “Tink said that giving him up wasn’t easy for John Darling. He had him for two years before he brought him to Neverland. I think he got a bit attached.”

“But he didn’t love him,” Emma says bitterly, stepping out of Killian’s embrace and swiping angrily at the tear tracks on her cheeks. “Not enough, anyway.”

Killian can only nod, for he fully agrees. There’s really nothing more he can say. Emma reaches for his hand, and he takes it, lacing their fingers together. She pulls him near as she turns back to look at the clouds as they roll by. She pulls his arms around her waist and leans her back against his chest. Her hair smells like vanilla and cinnamon. Her hand slides down his left arm to grasp his hook, and he can hardly breathe past the lump in his throat.

“He’s five years old now, Killian. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. He wasn’t supposed to grow up like me.”

“There’s one difference between your childhood and his, though. His mother is on her way to rescue him.”

Emma turns in his embrace, and a tear rolls down her cheek. “What if he doesn’t want anything to do with me? What if he hates me?”

Killian catches the tear with the pad of his thumb, then caresses the dimple in her chin. “I don’t see how anyone can hate you, my love. And children are infinitely forgiving. Think back to when you were five, Emma.”

She gives him a tremulous smile even as her eyes flood with more tears. He lets his forehead drop to hers, though he won’t initiate a kiss. That will be on her timetable, not his.

“My love,” she whispers, “I like the sound of that.”

She turns her head into his shoulder and wraps her arms around his neck as he holds her tighter.

“Your heart’s desire, Swan. That’s all I want for you.”

“What I want is my son. To love him and have him love me back. Is that selfish?”

Killian buries his fingers in her hair. “Not at all. I believe that’s called a mother’s heart.”

*****************************************

“It’s beautiful,” Emma breathes as soon as the Jolly Roger settles upon the waves after her magical flight. Killian comes to stand at Emma’s side, taking in the sight of Neverland on the horizon with fresh eyes. Dead Man’s Peak is no longer a hulk of jagged rock, but a verdant mountain. Skull Rock has mostly crumbled into the sea, leaving behind a shimmering coral reef. The ribbon of Rainbow Falls can even be seen cascading down into the valley.

“It wasn’t always,” Killian sighs, “but you’re right, it’s gorgeous now.”

Emma grins as she leans farther over the railing of the ship, and Killian’s heart is warmed to see it upon her face. She awoke this morning in a cold sweat, thrashing against an unseen foe. When she finally calmed in the circle of his arms, she explained the nightmare. She was back in that crumbling house, being attacked by those men, only her lad was there too. She was reliving her trauma, that Killian knew all too well, but he also guessed that her fears about meeting her son were also wrapped up in her nightmares.

“Mermaids!” she exclaims, pointing.

Killian leans over with her, and sure enough, a school of mermaids are leaping through the water alongside the ship. Frankly, he feels they’re showing off with their over-the-top acrobatics.

“They’re so colorful,” Emma observes.

“Aye,” Killian says, slipping his arm around Emma’s shoulder, “they’re happy to have their lagoon back. Soon the island will be teeming with the mystical creatures that used to live here so long ago.”

Emma shakes her head. “I still can’t believe Peter Pan was evil in real life.” Then she frowns. “And I’m a little pissed that I don’t get to kill him myself for what he did to my son.”

Killian holds back a chuckle, for he knows her anger is real. It makes his blood boil as well. Yet he loves this bold and brilliant woman, and admires her avenging spirit probably more than he should. He brushes a kiss to her temple.

“I would bring him back if I could, just so I could see you unleash your wrath on him. The gods know he deserves it.”

Emma wraps her arms around his waist and rests her head on his chest. “Thank you for saving Henry.”

“You’ve said that far too many times already, Swan.”

“Well, you’ll just have to hear me say it again.”

Hook and his crew sail the Jolly Roger into Pirate’s Cove as they always have, but even his men are struck silent at how the island has changed. Bright flowers bloom, and the songs of tropical birds fill the air. The remnants of Rainbow Falls trickles over the rocks of the bluffs ahead in a soothing rhythm.

Killian leaves his men with the ship and guides Emma through the thick trees, following the river that cuts through the island. Tink and Tiger Lily told him that no more dreamshade grows here. Every time a pixie dust tree blooms with new life, every dreamshade plant in its vicinity shrivels up and dies. Killian is glad he no longer has to fear the evil plant.

Emma is quiet as they walk along the path to the home of the fairies. He senses her nerves, and gives her hand a comforting squeeze. The smile she gives him is forced, but she squeezes back.

Tiger Lily and Tinkerbell no longer have reason to hide their domicile, so the cave is now open to the sunshine, and smoke rises cheerily from the chimney.

“This looks cozy,” Emma says, biting her lip.

“Aye, though the smoke there is just for show. Tink has this idea that every home needs a fire going, even when it’s bloody 99 degrees outside.”

Emma manages a nervous laugh and follows him down the short passageway to the main part of the house. Killian taps his hook in the open doorway to alert those inside to their presence.

Tiger Lily, unsurprisingly, isn’t home. Tink is at the sink doing dishes, but gasps and drops a bowl into the sudsy water when she sees her guests. Her hands fly to her mouth as she dashes across the room.

“You’re . . . you’re Henry’s mother!”

Emma gives Killian a surprised look, and he shakes his head in confusion.

“How in the world do you know that, Tink?”

“Oh Hook, really? I’m a fairy, I know these things.”

“She’s been impossible since she got her wings back,” Killian tells Emma.

Said wings flutter in indignation as Tink glares at him. “And you, Hook, have no manners. You haven’t even introduced me to our guest.”

“I didn’t have a chance the way you��ve been blubbering on.”

“I’m Emma,” Swan interrupts, giving Killian a pointed look, “and yes, I’m Henry’s mother.” She glances around the room, worrying once again at her bottom lip. “Where is he?”

“He’s napping,” Tink says, “but we could tiptoe in there if you like.”

“Should I?” Emma asks nervously. “I mean, I don’t want to scare him.”

Tink waves her hand. “He sleeps like a rock, believe me. Such a pleasant, sweet child, really.”

Emma’s cheeks pink and her hands twist nervously as she follows Tink down the short hallway. The fairy opens the door slowly to reveal a darkened room with twinkling lights strung from the ceiling. In one corner is a twin sleigh bed, and snuggled under the soft blankets is a little boy with chestnut hair. Emma’s trembling hand flies to her lips as she tiptoes closer. His cheeks are plump, his ears stick out from his head in an adorable way, and Emma can’t help noticing that he has Neal’s nose. She glances behind her and sees that Killian and Tink have slipped away to give her privacy.

Emma sinks to her knees beside the bed, her hand hovering over the child’s head. A half sob chokes in her throat as she gently strokes her little boy’s soft hair. He shifts in his sleep, clutching the teddy bear at his chest a bit tighter, and Emma quickly pulls her hand back. He rolls over, flinging one arm out, and that’s when Emma sees it: the buttercup birthmark that matches hers. The one she hasn’t seen since the day he was born. There’s no mistaking it, this is her son.

She rises from the floor and tiptoes back out of the room and down the hall. When she sees Killian, he gives her a concerned look, and she flies to him. He lets out a puff of breath when she collides with his chest, but he instinctively holds her tight.

“He’s beautiful,” she chokes out.

******************************

“John Darling adopted Henry when he was three years old. Apparently, he had terrible colic as an infant and severe night terrors after that, so he had been difficult for children’s services to place.”

Tink’s words seem to have little effect on Emma. Killian watches her with concern. The cup of tea in her hands is surely cold by now, and Emma hasn’t lifted it to her lips once since Tink gave it to her. She stares into the flames of the enchanted fire and idly pushes Wendy’s old rocking chair back and forth with her foot. Tink catches Killian’s gaze in concern, but he gives her a barely perceptible shake of his head. If Emma wants to engage, she can, but he won’t force her.

Tink clears her throat and leans towards Emma. “I believe Henry’s difficulties - the colic and the night terrors - has to do with him being a child of two realms.”

That catches Emma’s attention, and her gaze snaps quickly to Tink. “Two realms?”

Tink opens her mouth, but before she can explain, a small voice pipes up from the hallway, and Henry shuffles in. His face is flushed and sweaty from sleep, his hair is sticking up crazily, and he drags his teddy bear behind him by one leg. He freezes when he sees Emma and Killian. Tink notices and rushes to scoop the boy up on her lap.

“Henry, you remember Killian, right?” She brushes at his hair as Henry nods shyly. “And this . . . “

Tink edges towards Emma slowly, and Emma sets down her cup of tea with shaking hands. She edges onto her knees so she is eye level with Henry.

“ . . . this,” Tink continues, “is your mother, Henry. She’s come for you.”

“Hi, Henry,” Emma whispers, smiling despite her choked voice.

The boy blinks as he takes Emma in, then he eases off Tink’s lap and comes closer to the mother he hasn’t seen since the day of his birth. Killian can tell Emma is overwhelmed and that she longs to touch her son. He also knows she won’t until the child is ready.

Henry pulls his teddy bear closer and rests his chin between the toy’s ears. “Do you want to see my other toys?” he asks Emma softly.

Emma’s smile is wide and beaming. “Yes, I would like that.”

Henry reaches out and takes Emma’s hand. Once they’re out of sight, Killian drops his face to his hands, unable to help the tears that leak out of the corners of his eyes.

*******************************

“I can scarcely believe how much it’s changed,” Killian muses to Tinkerbell as he looks around him, “we were only gone a few days.”

He’s lounging on a picnic blanket, Tink sitting cross-legged next to him. Emma has taken Henry down to the edge of the water for a swim. The blanket is scattered with the remains of their lunch.

“It truly is beautiful,” Tink says with a sigh.

Killian tosses an apple core into the woods behind him, then lays back, flinging his arm across his eyes and resting his hook on his stomach. Tink gives a sardonic half laugh, haugh snort.

“Don’t get too comfortable, pirate, there are still a few lost boys out there.”

Killian rises up on his elbows and arches a brow at the fairy. “You think they’d cause trouble?”

Tink shrugs, squinting out at the water. “Felix was loyal to Pan almost to the point of obsession. They’ve melted into the deepest part of the jungle and are quiet for now, but . . . “

“Well, I’m not borrowing trouble,” Killian grumbles. His eyes find Emma and Henry, and his voice grows thick with emotion. “I’d rather enjoy a quiet moment while I have it.”

The sun shines on the water of Mermaid Lagoon, making it sparkle like diamonds. The songs of the mermaids float on the air, and it’s just as beautiful as Tink had always said. Henry is knee deep in the water, laughing every time one of the mermaids flicks her tail at him. They’ve learned that the creatures can be rather mischievous, but one named Ariel has taken a particular liking to Henry. Ariel’s their princess, actually, and her fondness for the boy means they all remain on their best behavior with him.

Killian laughs at Henry’s antics. Each time he lunges for a mermaid tail, said mermaid darts away, and the five year old ends up splashing face first into the water. Yet every time, he resurfaces with a sputtering giggle. Killian’s gaze shifts to Emma. She and Tink are the same size, so the fairy has loaned her some clothes. Emma is currently wearing a one-shouldered dress of ocean green that hugs her figure. The skirt normally hits just below her calves, but Emma has it hitched up to her knees. She sits on a rock next to Henry, her legs in the water. Henry splashes her, and she splashes back. Then Emma opens her arms wide, and Henry launches himself into her embrace. Emma presses him close, not caring that he’s getting her completely wet.

“These two weeks have been good for both of them,” Tink comments.

“Aye,” Killian agrees, unable to tear his gaze away from the woman he loves. Emma rises from the rock, cradling Henry like a baby, and walks up the beach towards them. Killian can see that Henry is getting sleepy by the way his arms have gone slack in his mother’s arms. Sure enough, when Emma deposits him on the picnic blanket, the lad’s eyelids are drooping. Emma wraps him up in a towel, and Henry curls up in a ball on the blanket, hugging his teddy bear close. Emma catches Killian’s gaze and smiles as she brushes Henry’s wet hair out of his face. Soon, the boy’s breaths even out, and he’s fast asleep.

Emma frowns. “Do you think it’s okay for him to sleep out here? He’s wet.”

“Don’t fret, my love,” Killian tells her, “the sun is warm, and you have him wrapped up snugly.”

Emma nods, but still bites her lip in concern. She’s only been a mother for two weeks, after all. What does she know? Killian probably knows more than she does after all his years of rescuing lost boys. Mason was Henry’s age when he joined the crew, so Killian had practically been a teen father.

“Swan,” Killian says gently, taking her hand and rubbing her knuckles gently, “you’re wonderful with him. A natural.”

She lets out a long sigh and gives him a wobbly smile. How he manages to read her like that is another thing she’s having to get used to. She watches her son sleep, rubbing his shoulder soothingly. Once he allowed her to touch him, she couldn't seem to get enough: hugs, rubbing noses, brushing his hair off his forehead, cheek kisses. Henry loves the affection too, often leaping onto her lap and cupping her face with his chubby little hands. One of Henry’s arms is flung out in sleep, a habit of his that Emma finds adorable. His birthmark catches her eye, as it often does.

“Tink,” she says softly, “these two weeks have been great. But don’t you think it’s time you explained to me what the hell this all means?”

Emma doesn’t miss the glance Tink tosses Killian’s way, yet the furrow upon Killian’s brow likely matches hers. He’s already told her about Pan searching for the heart of the truest believer and about the significance of Henry’s birthmark. What neither of them can understand is how she fits into all of this.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Tink hedges.

“None of that, you bloody stubborn fairy,” Killian admonishes in a teasing voice. “You said that Henry would be a child of two realms, but from what Emma and I can gather, he’s a child of only one. A land without magic.”

Tink sighs, then looks at Emma questioningly. “Tell me about his father again.”

Emma shrugs. “He was just a boy. An ordinary runaway.”

“A right jackass is what he was.”

“Killian!”

“Well he was!” Killian protests, and Emma can’t help but smile at his indignation. They’ve had many long nights filling in all the details of their time apart, and Killian is definitely not a fan of Neal.

Tink says nothing, her gaze distant, and Emma can practically see gears turning in her head. Killian looks nervous too, for some reason. Emma glances back and forth between them.

“What are the two of you not telling me?”

“A child of two realms,” Killian says, his gaze falling on Henry, “and . . . “

“A child of royalty,” Tink fills in.

Emma blinks and gasps, “You can’t be saying . . . I mean, you don’t really think . . . but I’m no different than Neal! A nobody, nothing, I -”

“You were never nothing,” Killian interrupts her firmly.

Her gaze softens at the intensity in his voice, but then she shakes her head, the implications of it all overwhelming.

“You’re from a realm of magic, Emma,” Tink says, “it’s the only thing that makes sense.”

“I was abandoned,” Emma argues.

“Think about it, darling,” Killian says softly, “you were found wrapped in a blanket that had your name stitched into it. Does that sound like careless parents to you?”

Emma rubs at her temple.

“I know it’s a lot to take in,” Tink says, “but the prophecy about the truest believer was very clear. You , Emma Swan, are not only from a magical realm, you’re also -”

“A princess,” Killian finishes for the fairy. Emma’s head snaps up at the sadness in his voice. His jaw clenches as he rises to his feet. “Which is why this idyllic little holiday must come to an end. My ship and my crew are at your disposal, your highness. I swear to you, we will find your family and your kingdom.”

Before she can process what he’s saying or the sudden formality in his voice, he’s turning away and striding quickly back through the jungle. Emma looks at Tink, her eyes blinking in confusion.

“What the hell is up with him?”

Tink sighs. “Captain Hook has quite the problem with self-loathing, I’m afraid.”

***********************************

Killian is slowly coming up from the depths of a deep sleep, fighting the persistent whisper of his name. Then soft lips brush across his, and he doesn’t want to fight it. His eyes blink open, and he squints in the dark, trying to see. A cool hand, a whisp of soft hair, and those lips again on the shell of his ear.

“Follow me, Killian.”

He thinks he’s dreaming at first, but when his arms reach for Emma’s side of the bed, and he finds it empty, the last cobwebs of sleep flee his brain. He sits up, heart pounding at first until he sees Emma in the doorway, smiling at him. She tilts her head in a gesture that says come on, and seems to glide out into the hallway. He knows it’s the illusion of her long, white satin nightgown, but it makes her look ethereal all the same.

Once he’s up and doing her bidding, she picks up her skirts and runs on her bare feet down the hall, through the parlor, and out of the cave. He swears he hears her giggle once they’re out in the moonlight, but he’s beginning to wonder again if this is a dream.

She stops at the edge of Mermaid Lagoon, and whirls to face him. He skids to a stop at the picture she makes, the light of the full moon pouring over her figure and illuminating her hair. That damn nightgown leaves little to the imagination, honestly, especially in this lighting. She smirks at him, as if she’s read his mind. Then she’s slipping the straps of the nightgown from her shoulders, letting the satin fall soundlessly around her feet. He’s completely shell-shocked now, blinking and practically gasping for air as he takes in her naked form, flawless and strong in the moonlight. They haven’t been intimate since her attack, and the sight before him causes an instant physical reaction. He suddenly realizes that he rushed after Emma without a shirt, without his brace, without his hook.

Without a weapon. He glances nervously at the jungle behind them, but Emma laughs.

“Is this a dream? A trick?”

She shakes her head and gives him a soft smile. “Killian. Seriously? I just felt we needed some time alone.”

That last word - alone - falls from her lips with weighted meaning. Then before he can respond or take another step, she turns and slips into the waters of the lagoon. She goes under soundlessly, then comes back up, only her head out of the water.

“Aren’t you coming, pirate? Or do you not know how to swim?”

It’s Killian’s turn now to smirk as he quickly discards his sleeping pants. “Oh believe me, love, I’m good in the water.”

He dives in, cutting across the lagoon with easy strokes. He breaks the surface right in front of her, and Emma immediately wraps her arms around his neck, pressing her naked body to his. He shouldn’t succumb to this temptation, not when he knows now who she really is and where she comes from. Yet his arms go around her automatically, and his forehead drops to hers.

“Emma,” he groans, “why are you torturing me?”

“Why are you torturing me?” she counters.

“I’m sorry?”

Emma’s fingers find his wet hair as she presses herself ever closer. “It’s been over two weeks, Killian. I miss you.”

“I didn’t want to push you.”

She smiles, nuzzling her nose against his, “I know, and God, I love you for that, but I’m ready.”

“But since then we’ve . . . well, now we know -”

“Stop it,” she commands, pressing a finger to his lips. Lips that curl up into a smile before pressing a kiss to the pad of her finger. “What was that for?”

“You sounded so regal just then.”

Emma rolls her eyes. “I’m not a damn princess.”

Killian frowns. “Yes you are, and we should be reuniting you with your parents, your kingdo-”

Emma cuts him off with a fierce kiss, her tongue assaulting his, telling him far more with her actions than she ever could with words. He shouldn’t kiss her back, but their wet skin is pressed together, her fingers are digging into his scalp, and fire is coursing through his veins. Emma wraps her legs around his waist, and he’s completely incapable of rational thought. He slides his hand and stump down to hoist her up, grabbing her flesh in the process and eliciting a groan from deep in her throat. He shifts her so they are lined up perfectly, and she moans as he enters her. It’s quick, and slightly awkward in the water, but it’s been so long that neither of them mind. Emma’s legs tremble around him, and she drops her head to his shoulder as they both come down.

“I didn’t mean for that to happen,” Killian tells her breathlessly.

“I did.”

He kisses her then, tenderly and with wonder. The jungle isn’t quiet; the water laps at the shore, crickets chirp, and leaves rustle. It feels like they can both finally breathe. He never wants it to end.

They stay in the water for a long time, never leaving one another’s embrace. Neither wants to break the spell of the night with words, so they speak with kisses instead. When they first try to leave the water, they make it only as far as the beach. He presses Emma into the sand with his weight, claiming her lips once again. Yet she’s the one who takes him, switching their positions and pinning his arms above his head. The moonlight is spilling over her again as she moves above him, her head thrown back, her breasts glorious. They come at the same time, and then Emma collapses against him, her hair everywhere. He gathers it in his hand as he presses a kiss to her shoulder.

The first light of dawn is just tinting the horizon when they finally get dressed. Killian tries not to look Emma in the eyes, worried still that this was all some sort of hazy dream, or worse, a goodbye.

He’s just slid his pants up to his waist when Emma comes up behind him, wrapping her arms around his chest and pressing her cheek to his back.

“This isn’t me saying goodbye, if that’s what you're thinking.”

His breath catches in shock. He’s not the only one who is perceptive. She’s smirking at him when he turns around, and she reaches up to cup his face in her hands.

“I love you, Killian Jones.”

“I love you, too.”

She searches his eyes. “I feel like my whole life, until now, I was just searching for something.”

He threads his fingers through her hair. “Aye love, I feel the same. Perhaps I have always been trying to find my way back to you.”

She gives him a tremulous smile, and he exults at what he sees in her eyes. Her next words, however, steal his breath.

“I don’t want to look for my parents.”

Killian frowns. “Emma, I’m sure they’ve been waiting for you all this time. Hoping, maybe even searching.”

She shakes her head. “I’m tired of living in the past. I’m ready to look forward - with you and with my son.” She presses a kiss to his lips and then drops her hands from his cheeks. Instead, she clasps both his hand and his stump and presses them to her chest.

Killian can scarcely breathe. “Swan, do you mean that you would . . . that is to say . . . “

Emma laughs as a single tear slips down her cheek. “Don’t make me ask you, pirate.”

He grins broadly as he presses his forehead to hers. “Marry me? Let me always, always be by your side? Let me be a father to Henry?”

“Yes, yes, and yes.”

Killian kisses her again as the sun breaks forth across Neverland.

Tagging: @snowbellewells​  @kmomof4​ @whimsicallyenchantedrose​ @teamhook​ @bethacaciakay​ @let-it-raines​ @welllpthisishappening​ @wellhellotragic​ @winterbaby89​ @xhookswenchx​ @courtorderedcake​ @branlovestowrite​ @hollyethecurious​ @vvbooklady1256​ @profdanglaisstuff​ @carpedzem​ @ekr032-blog-blog​ @jennjenn615​ @tiganasummertree​ @lfh1226-linda​ @ultraluckycatnd​ @spartanguard​ @shireness-says​ @scientificapricot​ @stahlop​ @resident-of-storybrooke​ @superchocovian​ @sherlockianwhovian​ @snidgetsafan​ @ohmakemeahercules​ @thislassishooked​ @ilovemesomekillianjones​ @nikkiemms​ @delirious-latenight-laughs​

[captain-emmajones]

in this life, we do not meet

Soulmate AU: The first curse never happened. Killian died 300 years prior to Emma's birth. They both live a life of loneliness, haunted by a love they never met, until death comes knocking at their door.

in which i made an angsty text post and people requested a fic out of it, hope you guys will like it <33

2000 words 🔱 angst 🔱 ao3 

dedicated to my dear friend @b99peraltiago because you’ve always been so supportive of my works i had to write you a gift :’) (sorry it’s not peraltiago :’)) 

The lyrics in italics come from Sarah Bareilles Once Upon Another Time, I had it on loop while writing and I really recommend it for the mood™️.

ORESTES: Where have I seen you before?

MOIRA: In a dream.

ORESTES: A thousand years ago.

.

Once upon another time, Before I knew which life was mine,

As Captain Killian Jones stands at the end of his life, on decks of his ship, still terribly proud in spite of everything, the waves tenderly cradling his boat are his last companions.

His crewmen were reluctant to leave him behind. They had all wanted to go down with the ship. With him. He couldn’t allow it.

“You are a part of my crew, mister Smee, and therefore you are also required to leave this ship –”

“— but Captain, I am your first mate –,”

“— I am well aware of that fact, Mister Smee. However, this is my last dying wish: to be left in peace.” To die alone.

His hooked arm guides the ship’s wheel, as always, while he presses a bottle of rum firmly against his lips. To distract himself from this poison inside of him, this hellish burn radiating from his chest – not only loneliness but the poison the Dark One infected him with.

It was yesterday. Or a week ago, difficult to be certain.

A seagull lands in front of him, completely unaware of his inner struggle. She sings.

He had been so close to killing him, after years, and years, and years…. And then she had appeared.

(He thinks he saw her first the day Milah died. Well, he didn’t properly see her.

But, as he lied sobbing in the safety of his own cabin, he did feel the warmth of a hand over his closed fist.

And it had suddenly felt a little less terrible, the hole in his chest, less terrifying the future to come, without her.

Perhaps is there so much loneliness the human heart can take before it begins to manifest something, someone, that doesn’t exist.)

She is an angel he has seen in so many of his dreams, visions, whatever bloody curse he is under.

Back on this very ship, the crocodile had come to taunt him and the blonde woman had begged him not to kill him. She said there would be repercussions beyond this life, and he wanted to believe her. Perhaps there was no other choice but to believe her.  

From the first moment he had laid eyes on her, years ago, he had known he was supposed to love her.

Perhaps not in this life. Perhaps one in which he is nobler, better, good.

The burn of a knife plunged into his chest had cut his thoughts short, and he had fallen down on his knees in front of his whole crew.

“Enjoy the ride, dearie! Your death will be slow and painful, just like you made my life when you took away Milah!”

The giggles of the Dark One still echo in his ears, but it is a fight he has definitely lost. It is a fight for the living, and he is dying.

He clenches his jaw as a brighter ray of sunshine plays on his eyelids. He frowns. He is drunk enough to numb the pain in his chest but not this gulf roaring within his throat.

As he is about to die, the sum of Killian Jones’ life is a lot of pain and wickedness.

(There is a tear at the corner of his eyes, one he firmly wipes with his hand.)

Dying alone is, after all, more challenging for the nerves than expected by the brave Captain.

A deep breath, to fill in his lungs with the salty sea air, one he’s loved his entire life.

Perhaps is he not so alone after all.

He has been haunted all his life by this angel of beauty, of love, perhaps of death. As if, maybe – just maybe –  things were supposed to end differently.

Bloody nonsense.

A flash of pain. The bottle of rum escapes his hand as his eyes shut in agony, a fire he knows sent from Hell overcoming him. His knees bend down, and his hand tries to hold on to the wooden wheel.

“Bloody hell, can’t it be a quick death?”

He chuckles to himself. What did you expect? The comfort of a loved ones’ arms?

Soon enough, he is unable to see clearly, and his head hits the floor, a muffled sob he isn’t aware of echoing on the ship.

Be quick. Be quick. Be quick.

And then, somehow, as darkness engulfs him and there is nothing but pain, a relief. A cold, white hand on his face – there must some comfort in death.

A smile splits his face open. “Oh, there you are… just in time, love…”

He thinks he sees tears on her face, and his heart screams: someone cares, someone cares,…  

One last breath, one last pang of pain, and he is gone.

(When the Jolly Roger is taken back by pirates with bright eyes and hopes, rumor has it that it is now a haunted ship.

The crewmen avoid at all cost to walk along the corridors at night, for a white figure lingers there.

She has blonde hair and translucent eyes and she seems to be waiting for whom will never come back.)

.

Truly, it is a happy life.

Although King and Queen of Misthaven, Emma’s parents offer her nothing but softness and love. She grows up sheltered by their good heart. (The one they share).

Oh, she does live a good life – one of very few heartaches.

(The few she endures are fighting against Regina, but it is never a lonely fight. Emma’s light magic is too powerful for the Evil Queen and she bends the knee. They evict her from the kingdom.)

Except perhaps when she wakes up covered in sweat, heart about to explode in her chest, eyes filled with tears, and she aches for whom she cannot reach.

It is not for a lack of trying. She feels like she’s dreamed of him her entire life.

Her mother has a knowing smile when she confesses her worries. Together, they decide to create an enchantment to find him, whoever he is.

(His eyes are of a forget-me-not blue, his hair of a dark brown, and there is so much pain in the absent smile he paints upon his face.

She wants to save him. Little does she know she is too late.)

It is truly a good life, except for that one moment, maybe, when she finds herself near the sea and she thinks she has finally found him and she discovers a tombstone with his name on it.

(“How can you tell it’s really him?” her mother asks.

She finds no shame in her heart when she replies: “He told me in a dream.”)

If she can make out anything in between her tears, it is the date: 1755 - 1789.

“He’s been dead for three hundred years,” she whispers in this foggy morning, one hand over the marble.

The sea breeze is cruel against her cheeks.

“Some things are just not meant to be”, Snow White tries to comfort her.

There is a moan that she muffles against her palm. But we were.

Being brought up in this environment of true love and happily ever after makes this burn over her heart even more painful.

(The pain comes from the birthmark she’s got under her breast, the shape of a knife enchanted with poison.)

But it is a good life.

It is however a short one.

The birthmark seems to infect itself, and the poison takes her over in a week.

Their princess is twenty-eight-year old when Snow White and Prince Charming lose her forever.

.

Killian Jones has always been a man of action and this after-life is a long agony of waiting.

Tik tok, tik tok,… Times flies but never towards the future.

At least, there’s still rum.

Rum has no taste back there, but there is a comfort in the habit.

One look at the clock. 8:15. The time of his death. As always. He drinks a mouthful of rum, waits for the burn that doesn’t come.

It is incredibly lonely there. It never gets more comfortable, warmer, it is forever dull and cold.

.

He is sitting in Granny’s when the air shifts. The door opens, and he instinctively looks up from his drink.

And then, a miracle occurs: the clock ticks forward.

There she is.

After all these years. He swallows down, tries to remain composed. His heart is about to burst out of his chest. The woman of his dreams is wrapped up in a dark red dress, a crown on her head, and void in her green eyes.

His blood becomes cold as his gaze meets hers and something within him urges him to stand up.

Welcome her.

There’s a flash of light in her eyes and he knows she recognizes him too.

“Killian,…”

It is awful to hear his name in the mouth of someone who cares for him, after all these years of heartache.

It is freeing.

The ghost haunting him for centuries is finally in front of him, in the flesh, and they are both dead.

A smile. “Well, I sure as hell have been waiting for you, your grace.”

Her smile then doesn’t reach her eyes but does break his heart.

.

“So, you are a royal lady?” a roll of his eyes.

He is playful to hide his discomfort.

They are both sitting outside of Granny’s, echoes of once upon another time dancing all around them.

She’s gazing at the furniture, surely taken aback, and no vision allowed him to fully grasp a glimpse of her beauty. Nor her kindness.

“Was,” she smiles, looks up at him and dives into his eyes.

She takes his breath away.

“And you are a pirate?” she enquires back, playfully.

Something hurts, in his chest. His blood turns cold. “That I am.” He is disappointing her.

You disappoint everybody.

“Well, my mother was a thief,” she quickly adds, she is perceptive.

Tough lass.

He smiles at her. And it is terribly tempting to fall in love with her in the blink of an eye.

.

As things turn out, she is so willing to love him and he is unable to believe he deserves that kind of love.

“I’ve known you my entire life,” she assures him as they sit on a bench by the underworld sea.

She wants to reach for his hand but he is cold and distant and terrified.

The air in this goddamn hell is unbreathable, and perhaps is it because they are not supposed to be breathing. It constantly smells of smoke and ashes, and she still smells like her old self, vanilla and cinnamon, and hope.

“You don’t get it,” he mumbles, remains as far as he possibly can on this tiny bench. He stares at his knuckles. And exhales: “You were the only flicker of light in an ocean of darkness.”

So many times, the only reason he had hold on to life was her face under the sky of a starless night.

A pause. “But I never deserved hope.”

I never deserved you.

.

She surely doesn’t expect him to believe he is a villain. In her visions, she has never seen one. She’s only seen somebody incredibly lonely.

She knows she cannot save him unless he wants her to.

She understands. He wasn’t raised with tales of true love and happy endings – and for heaven’s sake they are both dead and their skin is cold, but lord is her heart beating for him in spite of everything.

He’s waited three centuries. She can at least wait for the rest of eternity.

.

It takes a lot of patience, and kindness, and affection, to melt the ice around Killian Jones’ heart.

Hades doesn’t help her, mind you, is quite determined to keep them both in the Underworld.

“We can move on,” she tells him, still by the sea, “Together. Start over on the other side. Be happy.”

He nods. It isn’t much, but it does give her hope.

And when she grabs his hand, he lets her.

.

It is a very bright light, moving on. For the first time in this life, they do so hand in hand, ready to face all of eternity together.

But mostly, I believed in yellow lights, and tire marks. Sun-kissed skin and handle bars, And where I stood was where I was To be… No enemies to call my own, No porch light home to pull me home, And where I was is beautiful Because I was free.

[palizinhas]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Once Upon a Time (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Rumplestiltskin | Mr. Gold Characters: Baelfire | Neal Cassidy, Rumplestiltskin | Mr. Gold, Alice Jones | Tilly, Captain Hook | Killian Jones Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - No Enchanted Forest, The little Gold-Jones family dynamic we deserve, Milah is Alice's Mother, Teen Baelfire | Neal Cassidy Summary:

Neal Gold's evening takes a weird turn when his father and his stepfather announce they're dating.

[heddagab]

OUAT 1-7

Assuming this means 1 through 7 and not 1 and 7, here we go:

1. Who is your OTP?

Golden Queen 100% I do ship other ships as well, I think that for Ouat the better question would be “who’s your OTP for each character” haha. Like Snowing, Swanfire, Mad Archer, Dragon Queen, Red Beauty, Zades, Captain Hearts, Hookriel...

2. Who is your NOTP?

Outlaw Queen, Rumbelle, Captain Swan... Swan Queen because of my experience with the fandom’s mentality and behavior all these years (I don’t have a particular issue with SQ as a fanon ship and I also assume that the people who follow me and ship SQ don't subscribe to the above behavior and mentality because... why follow me then, right?) I have others too since Ouat has a million ships but I think those are the most talked about in general.

3. Favourite OTP moment?

Oh god, so many, I can’t even answer that question properly. All of them? *lol* I honestly have a sweet spot for the small details that are not much talked about, like when their fingers touched fleetingly in 6B because that’s the only contact they could have at that moment or how they drank from the same glass in s7

4. Who is your OT3?

Golden Dragon Queen 100% I also ship Red Golden Queen and in a very specific way Golden Shadow Queen. I do have an OT4 though and it’s Golden Snowing Queen of course

5. 3 favourite characters?

Yikes, only 3? Regina Mills, Rumplestiltskin, Neal Cassidy

6. Least favourite character?

I can’t choose ony one, it’s impossible. It’s Milah, it’s Hook s2-s6, it’s canon Belle, it’s Robin....

7. Scene you’d like to see?

How about all the scripted/shot deleted Golden Queen scenes FFS?!! We were so robbed. If we’re taking about things that should’ve happened in canon, do you have an hour? *lol* I mean honestly the general idea is them not tiptoeing around Golden Queen like... Regina calling him a “friend” after everything that happened is a joke. We know Roni and Weaver fvcked. We know the last kiss was a TLK. Why use the imagery and not fully commit? I just.. I can’t, Golden Queen deserved better plain and simple. They intended to have Rumple and Regina as having a sexual/romantic/whateveryouwannacallit relationship from the very beginning, their first drafts were written as such, hence why you think in 1x02 they were about to kiss in the cell, but what they ended up doing is just... writting it in their story continuously on one hand (so you’d think they did that for a reason right?) but then tiptoeing around it. I’d just like a show where Golden Queen would be treated with respect.

Send me a fandom and a number

[carpedzem]

2 and captain swan baby 💕💕💕💕

thank you thank you! 💕💕💕💕

002 | Send me a ship and I will tell you:

When I started shipping them: somewhere between season 2 and 3 but I can’t say when exactly since I literally was watching this show 24/7 hahahaah it was year 2018

My thoughts: I love them so much! like I don’t ship that intensely but I’m so obsessed with them with their story and with them and even with ouat making some weird decision in latest seasons fans of this ship were so blessed. I’m yet to find ship with such a cool story when you can see them getting together and being together and with so many adventures and sdfknhuiodgnt they are so perfect for each other, true love and soul mates and they understand each other and dfgdggert

What makes me happy about them: oh ugh like all of them but I’m a goner for small gestures like holding hands (and a hook!), looking at each other, small kisses, when the say each other names and omg the pinning lkbfviqepgvbqev

What makes me sad about them: it’s really petty of me because I know we are winners in this show but I wish some decisions in season 6 weren’t made lol also Emma and Killian both deserve much more love and recognition from other characters than this one person 👀

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: I feel like I have no right to judge since I’ve shown 0 of my fanfics and this is someone’s hard work. I don’t really like when Killian gets his hand back. Modern AU’s are okay but any canon divergence or Enchanted Forests are like... -10 points every time. and I really don’t like when they get a new house and there is no room for Henry like??????????????? but hey write what you want okay just don’t mind me :x

Things I look for in fanfic: captain cobra, (enemies to) friends to lovers, room mates, canon divergence, princess Emma pirate Killian you know, the good stuff

My wishlist: if I can put one thing on my wishlist it would be: a cat. I need, need so much fic with a cat. no dogs. we have a lot of them :x but cats? oppressed as always :x Killian Jones is a cat person you can’t change my mind

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: aaaaaaaaaaa what king of a question is this?? I can’t answer that lol. oh okay for Emma Graham, maybe???? like, I think he hurt her the least? for Killian Milah but only because he clearly loved her so much and I want him to be happy

My happily ever after for them: just them having happy life, and maybe a not-that-dangerous adventures, maybe making Henry a big brother if they feel like it. mostly just them feeing loved and surrounded by family and more love 😌