#we got these bees yall. we got em

[kingkennny10]

Please Please Please

SP Apocalypse AU

Pt. 5 It Begins

Here it is, the beginning of the end, where will everyone go? Who dies? Who makes it out? How will the show go? Another chapter i love, it took me longer to post because i keep editing it instead of just putting down what i wrote on paper, mb yall, theres plenty of blood at the end of this, your typical apocalypse stuff 💕

Tonight's the night, the big opening gig in Denver! You ride with Jimmy to the place an hour and a half early and sit in his mini dressing room sipping on some water as you wait for him to finish his rundown with the venue owner. Jimmy enters the room with a tired look on his face making you pout at him. "You alright there big fella?" You ask patting the other chair next to you. He comes over and takes a seat heaving out a big sigh before speaking.

"Yea, just before show n-nerves I guess..." He says and you let out a giggle. You've never known Jim to be nervous. "I'm glad your here with me though." He reaches over to hold your hand but you use it to take another sip of your water instead.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, you know I'll always support your career Jim jim!" You say after swallowing down the water. He gives you a breathy chuckle in response.

"There's already a couple p-p-people out there and I go on in 30, a-are you gonna head out there?" Jimmy asks and you nod.

"I guess I should, hopefully there's people I know so we can make fun of you." You say with a laugh. You get up and pat Jimmy's shoulder. "Good luck out there Jim." You begin walking towards the door.

"No good luck kiss?" Jimmy asks you as you reach for the knob. You give him a half hearted laugh.

"You don't need it, you're gonna knock 'em dead Jim." You said as you exit the room. You make your way to a door that opens next to the stage. You take a deep breath as you look around the sparse audience. As your making your way up the isle and towards the back you spot a very familiar face, belonging to non other than Kenneth McCormick. You make it halfway up the isle before you stop and drink in his appearance. No coat, just a white button down and some black slacks, his hair was long and half up. You didn't notice but you lick your lips at the sight. You continue walking slowly towards him.

"Do my eyes deceive me or is that my grease monkey!" You say loud enough for him to hear you now that you're halfway to him. He looks over and jumps up and into the isle to meet you halfway.

"The one and only! How've you been sweetheart?" He says and lifts you into a crushing hug. You giggle into his chest at the pet name.

"I've been fine. How 'bout yourself sweetface?" You ask him as he sets you down gently, leaving his hands on your waist. Your hands gently placed on his shoulders and your both making steady eye contact with big smiles across your faces.

"It's been a rough couple days, but you always know how to cheer me up, always have." Kenny says placing his forehead on yours. "C'mon, you're sittin' with me." He tells you as he grabs one of your hands leading you to where he was sat, only one seat between you and the isle.

"How's Karen and Kevin been? I haven't talked to you in who knows how long." You ask and he smiles all the way up to his eyes. You could never forget how close he is to his siblings, it's something you always found endearing about him.

"Kevin and I got into a bit of a fight a couple days ago, I'm out of a job now, oh well.” He shrugged. “Karen on the other hand, she's doin' amazing, she's gonna graduate early and she already has a bunch of scholarships racked up so she can go to college on the east coast!" He tells you full of excitement. You're sad to hear about the falling out with his brother, but the joy you feel about Karen's accomplishments overtakes those feelings. You were always close with Karen when you were still close with Kenny. “What about you and Jim boy?” He says laughing at the nickname. You laugh with him before letting out a sigh to answer.

“Its been great, he’s my best friend, but over the past 6 months he’s been pushing for more than that.” You say leaning back in your seat looking at the ceiling. Kenny only laughs at you. “What’s so funny over there mister?!” You ask jabbing him in the side. He laughs more and puts his hands between you to stop further jabs.

“I’m sorry I just always thought you guys were together and like, married.” Kenny said still laughing. You scoff and begin laughing in disbelief.

“Kenny, you’ve seen the guys I’ve dated, why would you think that?” You’re still shocked at his assumption. You’ve always dated more the asshole type or dudes that get their hands dirty. Kenny being one of the few you dated.

“You dated Tolkien for a bit! I could see Jimmy makin it in!” Kenny said with a laugh. You roll your eyes.

“Don’t you remember me complaining about how formal dating him was? It sucked, that’s why I dated you.” Both of your laughter died down but your smiles still shown brightly. You flinched and looked over at Kenny who began laughing again.

“And I was the best of them all. I don’t think you dated anyone after me.” You scoffed laughing at him. “The Mccormick charm is too good to beat, sorry dollface.” He said confidently with a shrug. You smacked his arm in response with a laugh. It’s true, but he doesn’t need to know that. Kenny was the best you had, he was an amazing partner and kept up with your spontaneous plans. Your break up with him is the reason you ended up in Jimmy’s group of friends.

“You’re only half right mister Mccormick.” You said as you took another glance around at the audience. Another familiar head of hair caught your eye leading you to cut Kenny off from responding with more questions. “Now thats either Craig or Stan. Place your bets now sweetface.” You whispered nudging Kenny and pointing to a head of black hair 2 rows in front of you. He laughed and rubbed his hands together.

“For sure Stan, ready?” Kenny asked with a devious smile playing on his lips. You giggled and nodded. “STAN MARSHTON!” Kenny yelled out making Stan almost jump out his seat. You and Kenny cracked up seeing him stand up making a ‘what the fuck’ motion before coming over to sit next to you and Ken. “It works every time.” Kenny whispered to you cutting himself off with his own laughter leading you to follow suit.

“Nice to see you guys too.” Stan said defeated crossing his arms. Finally slowing down your laughter you leaned in and hug him, Kenny squishing you to join the hug.

“You missed us, it’s okay we know.” You told him with a giggle. You guys let Stan go both staring at him for him to agree.

“God dammit, yes fine okay. I missed you guys.” He said with an eye roll and a laugh. He leaned back in for another hug trapping you in between him and Kenny yet again. You all laughed together feeling like the happiest people on earth.

“So where’s carrot top?” You asked with a pout. “Yall are like, conjoined twins or something.” You finished with a laugh, Kenny joining in.

“Oh, him an Ike had a family trip to Jersey pre-planned so they couldn’t make it.” Stan said with a shrug.

“I’m glad you could make it tonight then!” You said patting his shoulder.

“Oh yeah! You still work at Tweaks right?” Kenny asked from beside you.

“Yea, I get the weekends off so I was able to make it thankfully.” Stan said happily. “I’m glad I got to see you guys again. I missed you both.” Stan said and began laughing at you and Kenny’s faces. Both of you made the same puppy dog face obviously touched he said such a thing.

“Y/n hold me I’m gonna cry, I’m so emotional.” Kenny said dramatically falling into your lap. You held him like a baby and continued pouting nodding your head in agreement.

“Stanley Martian missed us. We need to go for coffee every day he works from here on.” You said adding sniffles for affect. Stan laughed at the both of you making you and Kenny return to normal seated positions.

“I’d love to see you guys more often, I spend all my time with the same 4 people, I miss how spontaneous you guys are.” You and Kenny let out a drawled out ‘awww’ at Stans words which made him laugh again. The lights in the auditorium dimmed leaving only a spotlight shining on the closed curtain.

“Yall ready for Slim Jim?” You whispered loud enough for both of them to hear. You didn’t catch any response yourself but they both nodded with eyes on the stage. The place was packed and filled with excitement as some un-copyrighted music played from the speakers. The curtains opened and a couple seconds after Jimmy made his way on stage bowing when he got to his mark in the center.

“W-wow! Thank you guys! Such a-a lovely audience!” He started off with a line that most of the familiar faces would know. “So many familiar faces tonight! Lemme hear you South Park!” Jimmy said causing a third of the audience to cheer loudly, including some party hounding from you and Kenny. His opening act got 5 minutes of normalcy before the main doors slammed open drawing everyone’s attention.

“And he’s here after all.” You said unenthused leading Stan to laugh. You didn’t need to turn around to know who walked in, but as he began his walk down the isle you watched quietly.

“Better late than never Cartman!” Jimmy said from the stage. Cartman flipped him off and made his way all the way to the front sitting at one of the booth seats in the front row.

“I feel bad for Jimmy.” Kenny said knowing Cartman was gonna heckle him. You laughed and patted his hand.

“It’s fine, he was counting on him showing up.” You said with a sigh. Both Kenny and Stan laughed seemingly more engaged.

“Fuck you J-J-J-Jimmy!” Cartman started. Jimmy laughed as he heard a couple groans from the crowd. Cartmans table was stocked with drinks and snacks as were the rest of the booth seats and he made quick work of them.

“Plenty of you here kn-know this guy here, but for those of you who don’t! Keep small children and p-p-pets away from him! He’ll gobble them down while your n-not l-l-looking!” Jimmy spoke to the crowd leading everyone to laugh. Cartman began a fit of fake laughter drawing attention back on him before he began coughing. “Woah! Slow d-down there man, don’t ch-choke!” Cartman didn’t stop coughing as he brought one hand to clutch at the side of his neck and the other to flip Jimmy off. “Hey can someone escort him to medical real quick! His necks bleeding bad!” Jimmy said looking over to the security by the stage.

“What the fuck?” Stan said quietly beside you. All you could do was watch.

“THIS PLACE IS GONNA HAVE A LAWSUIT! SOME DRUNK BITCH ATTACKED ME IN YOUR PARKING LOT!” Cartman yelled to the 2 security guards taking him out of his seat. His coughing continued as the brought him back up the isle passing your trio. Cartman stumbled to the ground before making it to the door falling limp. The security guards quickly tried picking him back up only for Cartman to yell out grabbing one of the guards and start attacking him.

“What the fuck is happening.” Kenny stood up grabbing you and holding you close. You grabbed Stans hand pulling him up as well. The other guard tried pulling Cartman off of the man but when he saw all the blood he turned to run. Cartman was covered in blood and the first guard was in a puddle of blood face down on the floor. He got up quickly with a scream running after the guard that was running towards the other main entrance. The first guard shook and got up running to the audience members across the isle from your trio attacking anyone he could.

“C’mon lets go!” Stan said sternly pulling you and Kenny with him. Everyone was in a panic to get away and you seen Jimmy wasn’t on the stage anymore. The rush of people was ridiculous but Kenny and Stan held a firm grip. “Too many fucking people.” Stan cursed looking around.

“Go through the side door by the stage!” You told Stan and he changed directions. You all ran to the door, Stan shoving everyone out the way to get all of you out safe. A few people had the same idea and there was also a flood of people coming into the hallway after you three.

The screams were deafening coming from behind you, you took a glance behind seeing blood splatter on the white walls near the door. Kenny shook his head. “Dont look back, keep going.” His voice was shakey which didn’t help the nerves and adrenaline rushing through you.

Passing by injured people along the way you all made it to the parking lot safely. One look around and you all were shocked. There was shattered glass from the windows of the buildings, many people running frantically to escape. Gunshots could be heard but you couldn’t tell from where. You couldn’t control your breathing no more. Kenny wrapped his arms around you applying some pressure to your chest and you began to focus hearing Stans voice. “Do you guys have a way out of here?”

“I was dropped off.” Kenny said with a shake of his head.

“I-I rode with Jimmy.” You said with a shaky voice. Stan gripped your hand tighter and pulled both of you with him again.

“Follow close! Its a 2 door get in on the passenger side.” Stan said wasting no time dragging you both to his car. He let you go once he made it to the tailgate and unlocked the car. Kenny opened the door pulling the seat forward for you to get in and hopping in as soon as you sat. Stan already had the car started as Kenny shut the door.

“WHAT THE FUCK!” Kenny shouted and put his head in his hands. Stan pulled out the parking spot quickly and made his way to the main streets of Denver hitting a few questionable looking people along the way. You were still in shock in the back seat looking out the back window of the car. Many people roaming the streets, some running, cars driving frantically hitting others, some crashed into buildings. “Phones are dead.” Kenny said making you turn around to look at him.

“Theres no way that fat bastard started the fuckin apocalypse.” Stan said in disbelief. You let out an exasperated laugh leaning forward onto the console with your head in your hands. Looking up you notice Kenny frantically fidgeting with his phone. You wrap an arm around his middle and use your other to bring his head to yours. He places his phone down taking a shaky breath before turning to hug you suddenly.

“We’re gonna get her first.” You say to him. He grips your shirt squeezing you close to him. “She’s alive, and we are gonna get her out safe and sound.” You say petting his hair. He nods his head in silent response. You knew he would be worried about Karen first. You knew his brain a little too well, and because of that you know how to calm him down.

“Thank you y/n.” Kenny says staying in your embrace. You rubbed his back and softly dragged your fingers through his messy hair. His breathing was still a little fast but it’s better than it was.

“To the Mccormicks then.” Stan says. You place one of your hands on Stans arms rubbing it as a thank you. Your glad that your in this together, you couldn’t have chosen better people to be with.

Yall i love this chapter, i had to rewrite it 3 times and it got deleted once but its here now, am i gonna elaborate on the past relationships? Yeah, is it gonna be in the next chapter? NOPE!! Wheres jimmy? Wheres Karen? Are Kyle an Ike alright? Who else was there at the show? Oooooooo

[jrueships]

top 5 movies

OOOO OKAY so i actually hate doing top tens because i overthink everything and constantly switch things around SOO... im just gonna do a collection of five things bee likes SORRY FOR THE FALSE ADVERTISING 😭

1 City of God

i hate telling people this is one of my fav movies cus I don't wanna seem like that pretentious person who only watches foreign films for the sake of watching foreign films. This is literally my favorite movie because it's my favorite movie. I don't really watch a lot of movies and this just happened to be one i found and happened to like! I read the book first (dont. By the way. It kinda sucks partly because it got translated poorly so not it's fault but mainly because it's violence for the sake of violence. Like if the movie went just by book, i wouldn't like it. But it doesn't so <3 )

think of the movie and the book like No Country For Old Men. The book goes for shock and suspense and the movie goes to make it Art. It's a really pretty film and you kinda value it more knowing like. None of the actors went anywhere. They did their piece for the film then that's pretty much all. It's a good film of a bad film that made it good film? Like what happens is bad, but the bad doesn't happen just to happen and be Bad. IDK man !

Next is

YEAH SO. LMAO um 😭 let's get this clear i hate b*ll i hated him from the beginning righteous prick and i always skipped his parts in the show or used it to do homework when i was lil. I JUST REALLY LOVED THE ANIMATION!! the show and the movie is ass tho. BUT IT'S THE KINDA ASS... you Enjoy 😈. All intentions possible. I love love LOVE watching this movie with friends so we can make fun of it and point out the terrible writing, not in a 'we're better sense' but a 'LMFAO WTF WAS THAT????'

it's a very WTF WAS THAT movie and i love it 😭. Weird Harold, Rudy, and Otis (yall don't even know any of these people but especially Otis. All u gotta know is he's the best) carried. Dumb Donald has a great design cartoon wise but he got on my nerves. He's alright tho

the harder they fall's soundtrack is SO good. It's so cool, it's just a COOL movie. It's an action movie so some of the characters could've been written better (especially some of the women. They werent written horrible but they had more potential that you can feel wasnt justly reached), but the characters they spent time on, you could tell. From their stories and personalities and dialogue and interactions, very cool!!! Sometimes an almost anime-esque kind of movie? Sometimes shot like Scott pilgrim? Sometimes sphagetti western.. Sometimes action.. Sometimes comedy! It's a COOL movie that you can think about a little bit but not cramp yourself over. It's not a complete turn your brain off though. It's engaging in what it is! Which is a lot of things, so it's very engaging!!!

Blade!!!!!! The patron Saint of joth gf!! my first!!! my beloved!! my EVERYTHING!!!!! the movie's writing shows its time in only having personality in 'crazy side villain who dies' 'clever quip when someone dies' 'sad for short time when someone dies'. Maybe the new blade movie wouldn't be in such a fumbling state if i was in the writer's room with my divine, lifesaving advice of 'just make blade more babygirl'. Literally. That's all you have to do. It's not that difficult. ANYWAYS yeah he and the flash and hawkman were my 3 only childhood 'superhero' heroes. This is more of a personal childhood attachment thing like Albert than being a.. Good movie. BUT it DOES have its cinematography! You can feel the wuxia inspiration in some scenes

these two can sit in the same space because they're both childhood films as well. Boyz was better at leaning into characters as human (which i value a lot) and menace was better at showing the edge of what life can do to characters. They're both good films in their own right! Check em out! I liked menace way more than the other when i was younger but growing up im leaning more toward the other but they're AGAIN theyre both super snazzy

Some honorable mentions... to make up for the lack of a ranking system:

- New Jack City: NEWWW JACK! CIIIITYYY (NEW JACK CITYY 🎶 !!) older blaxplotation movie so cheesy, cheap, but like? Cool??? cut out the cheesy old cop crud and you get an entertaining villain with an entertaining mob. Also there's one death in the movie that's a brutal one, and it's offscreen. You just see a glimpse of the desecrated aftermath. Those are like the best deaths in a movie tbh. The imagination being our biggest friend and our biggest enemy. Love it love it!

- dead presidents: WAR IS TRAUMATIZING!!!

- mean girls: the Brutus speech about Cesar.. no essay can compare. Shakespeare shut the fuck up bitch

- clueless: 🥰

- little shop of horrors: open up here i come

- in the wood: STACY!!!!!!!

- Rocky: Apollo slayed and then he died

- sky high + high school musical: Disney peaked with these characters then never again

- FRIDAY + Friday 2: loved the 'you don't need a weapon' moral trying to be taught then using a weapon (brick) in the end. Seamless

- ratatouille: the wii game ratatouille was my red dead redemption

- baby jody: all manchilds need to watch this. It's hilarious and it's true. Don't be a manchild. Grow up. OH also the mom has a little garden and it's really cute. And she's super buff. People try to plant shit in her garden. Makes me so mad. We can never have nice things!!!

- coraline: the movie was so cool.. the video game on the wii scared me so bad i had nightmares from the bad game over screens. But the designs were great the elements the songs the using good characters abilities into their bad character abilities UGH it was SO cool!!! i hate people that like coraline though... it's like.. idk how to describe it. there's like two types of theater people... either really really nice or seems really nice, actually a huge usually passive aggressive or control freak holier than thou smart ass who thinks they're the stem of theater because their personality is loving hamilton (i fucking hate hamilto

- hot boyz: this movie is straight ass

- king of New york: this one kinda sucked too but the secondary villain was gay and awesome

- Good Burger: i watched a blossoming boy romance in a place that sells burgers. Good burgers.

- Monster House

they survived because they had sex

-Kung fu panda all of them except maybe not the 3rd: just gorgeous gorgeous movies. The animation is stunning

- Hustle & flow: Ludacris !!!!!!!!! Acts!! He gets his ass kicked but that's ok. I think in another film he also gets his ass kicked? I can't remember tho. He loves losing

- Se7en: themed kills that play with unique abilities 🥰🥰 i don't have the patience for a murder mystery so i don't remember who did it or what was in the box and i don't cool. Seven deadly sins awesome

- Barbershop: mollusk man and preppy man should've had sex. Hate sex specifically

- that one movie? 9?: i watched it when i was little and alone. The Bara fucking dies

- Johnny English Reborn aka THE MR BEAN X DANIEL KALUUYA MOVIE IM TELLING YOU THEY HAD S*X!!!!!!@ it's actually a mainly unfunny movie with some funny parts like most older comedies but it's gay so it's ok

- encanto: i don't like encanto like Some people like encanto but it was the first movie that made me upset, I can't even Identify why?? It got me in my feelings and i don't even know!! How!! Or what!!!! I wouldn't say it's my favorite movie in terms of i want to see it again because i Like it, but it IS a good movie!! Like objectively it's great

- night at the museum: gay

- white chicks: the dancing scene? Monster high wishes it could

- cars: the purple car was so hot

- mo' better blues: so much could be solved if hate sex...

- remember the titans: football polycule and mean man

- fences: father issues . The Movie.

- into the spiderverse: yes.

- the players club: her boyfriend's name was Lance who tf is called Lance who is real? Like a real person? Lance is for GTA Lance Vance who likes to Dance. He cheated because he was always fake. Like Lance armstrong.. they are not. Real people.

- NOPE: the spectacle idea is SOOOOO

- glory road: gay people gay people gay basketball people gay

- space jam: i thought this was the coolest shit when i was little but the part where Michael's manager got flattened gave me nightmares.

Let It Shine: lord of Da Bling.....

-space jam 2: robot dame is still hot

- Get Out: I liked reading the script a lot for this one!! Also gay. Loving gay couple who survived crazy white people and coparent a tiny dog very well. A well deserved happiness

- jump in: this movie is like fat albert to me

- white men can't jump: gay couple school the system (love wins)

- Jason takes manhattan: my favorite character is on watchmojo top ten best Jason kills 😭😭 Julius gaw you should've won and i stand by that. Should've donkeykicked him in the stomach ROLL CREDITS!!!!

[13thdoodle]

KC's DP AU Masterpost

so I can keep track of them bc I have too many

Okay this is masterpost for all my AUs along with some short summaries so its kinda long. I put em under readmore so it's not too long

(Updated some of the links and their summaries. I didn't link all of the doodles/art on the corresponding AU tho so uh there's usually more on the tag there ovo;;)

There's the tag links on the title and then the chronological link from oldest to newest. The chrono link only available on browser tho for some reason

Flip DP AU | chrono (this one start off by beabaseball but i went off with it ;;)

The 'what if Danny grew up in ghost zone instead of human world' au

1 portal dani n family vlad fentons freakshow 2 undergrowth wes jazz denial vlad 2 home fic

DP Phantasy AU or DP Fantasy AU (main tag is the phantasy one) | chrono

Fantasy / dnd inspired AU where Danny is a lich that kinda tied to the portal n moreless work as it's gatekeeper. Sam a necromancer druid n Tucker an articifier

1 2 3 Pitchfork Kids animatic ; Dnd-tober 1 2 3 4 ; Ectober week ; this one comic enn made that i love n yall should see it ; ghost king bit ; 31 Phantasy bits 1 ; 2

Unicorn Blood AU | (chrono)

Start off as "so if u drink unicorn blood in hp world you'll be cursed and is half alive" and i went off from there. Phantom and Danny shared their life force (Phantom the life energy, and Danny the body if that makes sense) This is Dark Ages (PariahxClockwork) AU too bc Phantom is their adopted son :3c

start prompt comic past time

DP Kitsune AU | chrono

Danny is (somewhat) possessed by kitsune / fox spirit and has some of its power. Set in japan. Mostly vibe n not much plot. Technically a No One Knows AU. I initially made this as a base for other ppl to jump off and have their own version of the AU, so a lot of the asks answers are kinda... non-committed?

1 2 3 Dannymay doorway ; Illusion (animatic) ; candle ; midnight ; cont. ;

DP Reverse Evil Trio AU (start from invisobang server) | from start

AU where the trio got possessed by ghosts but we switched the ghosts' power around. Danny got Nocturn but plants; Sam got Undergrowth but pharaoh; Tucker got Duul Aman but dreams; this is "arent u tired of being nice, dont u just wanna be feral" au n they do

1 2 april 3rd special

DP RET Time

A variant of RET AU where Clockwork adopts the RET trio for reasons, but really now we have 3 feral kids with time power n CW can't be more proud

DP OCs :

I love my OCs way too much now there's a shittons of AUs for them as well askjdnakjdss

31 | chrono

first post ; Roleswap w/ Dani AU ; Phantasy AU ; Pet for he ; spy?AU ; Observants AU ; Gladiator AU ; Assassin AU ; Thirty-One fic by matrix ; Learning Curve fic by isono-s-den ; dannymay freedom

Levi | chrono

who's Levi ; BtB AU ; magia AU + 31 ; Phantasy AU ; Treasure Planet AU ; Regret fic by Enn ; RRR fic by Dante ; with Jordam (AJ's ocs) ; Angst Week Obsession Corruption Death ; Jordam's non existent twin fic by matrix ; Erinyes (Levi's older sister, Bee's oc)

[tsurangaconundrum]

Hey bestie!! Yeah that was me the other day with the mangos, seriously I really shoulda looked it up or something cuz that was almost as bad as the time i accidentally used powdered sugar instead of flour. I hope whatever beings that look down at us like ants talk about me like posts about jensen ackles. Maybe i wanna be the pretty man with the fruity little boots! You ever been in onea those houses that look like hgtv? I Do Not Belong Here. Also i forgot my meds at home lmfaooo. Youve probably seen those oil pumps, the ones that look like birds pecking, yeah? (unrelated but onetime we found some frog eggs in the water tank of one and we took em home and raised em up into frogs!). And they have those out in the ocean, one exploded recently i think?? So we was watchin a video on em and apparently they build em close to each other and idk if the guys from one rig will boat to another to like play cards or something but i think it would be fun if they did. Also i think theyre kinda rad looking, like if they werent so bad for the enviroment and stuff i think ppl should just live on those. I guess itd be hard to make money there? Tho they can be fairly self sufficient too i think. But ok there was this scooby doo episode on onea these and velma was like gay for this mermaid?? Idk it was pretty much my fav one except ofc she turned out not actually being a mermaid which was lame cuz i think mermaids fuckin rock. Tho i think the idea of freshwater mermaids is much cooler. Like imagine getting pulled to ur death in a river not by the undertow but cuz u stepped too close to a mermaid hole. Fuckin awesome shit there. Ohh speaking of which I seen ur thing on japanesenatural, but like. Thats such a clever take on spn??? Everything i know about japanese ppl comes secondhand, friends, neighbors, social studies, etc. but i like reading about ur stuff on it. Every time someone takes spn and looks at it through a different lense, especially identity based, its always so good. Its about giving fictional characters ur lived experiences and processing things thru them ig. Also i saw yall was talking about poems earlier and while i dont know a lot of em i rlly like that one about the orange and idk if someone brought that one up already. “I love you im glad i exist” OK!!!!!! OK!!!!!!!!!!! I am feeling some things! Love how cas is very into bees like every time this bitch mentions insects im just!!!! Mmmm and i personally, being rhe person who has a ton of useless info on insects (not so much specifically bees but i know some. Mostly cuza castiel actually.) very much enjoy this. Yessssss lets talk about insects ily bestie!! I love being friends with other queer ppl…. Like omg same! I dont remember what i said to u last time also i feel like i just talked a lot so im gonna go before i start repeating myself also isnt it so frickin crazy its sunday??? And like the 4th of july. Here they only can have sponsored city approved firework shows so they already did those, but back home peoplell still be shootin off fireworks till next sunday lol. Im glad we arent doing anything this year. Learning from perspectives outside of the country has made patriotism taste much more rotten. How ru????????? I think its weird when ppl have cameras everywhere like in the house im in theres an ipad set up in the kitchen and u can see every angle of the outsidea the house. Some guy in my neighborhood has like floodlights and a buncha cameras all over their house that always comes on when im walkin the dogs at night and ik they got robbed a few times so /ig/ it makes sense but also theyre all really annoying and the dad is a cop and every person in my neighborhood who got robbed was a total asshole so like??? Is it rlly a crime if its funny?? Mbby if u stopped posting about qanon on facebook ppl would like u more smh. No but crime is bad ig. I wish ppl would garden with me cuz a lotta these people have nice manicured lawns (and seriously FUCK those. Biodiversity ftw babey!!) but dont rlly know how to garden which is different from me cuz i know how im just bad at it

DSFJJSDFJKL dba first off. powdered sugar instead of FLOUR????? also im so glad you like japanesenatural i think it's very fun as well! tasty treat just for me. as for the orange poem it's literally my favorite poem of all time i read it for the first time like sitting in class and fully tearing up it's so good. happy fourth of july to you too! i hope you have many people to talk insects with bestie. as for gardens i literally killed my little cactus i kept in a window sooooo. oops. i'll leave that to u guys.

[sergeant-donny-donowitz]

To Omar (Omar Ulmer x Fem!Reader)

Requested by @cass-danvers A/N: YALL THIS ONE HAS SOME HEAVY HAMILTON REFERENCES (No spoilers, just lyrics )

@owba-chan @war-obsessed @inglourious-imagines @tealaquinn @struggling-bee @frozenhuntress67 @kwyloz @sodapop182 @marlenemarauders @what-the--curtains @taikawho Let me know if you wanna be added to the IB or OUATIH taglists! :) ____ Omar was a young man, just recruited with a handful of other eager, wide-eyed boys into an elite team. One that would soon come to be known as The Basterds. This was their last night stationed in a base, somewhere in England. Young, and dreaming of glory, they all sat around, living the last night where they were guaranteed life. They each got their last handfuls of mail, before having to go under the radar and off the grid for quite some time... For some of them, perhaps for the rest of what remained of their lives. Omar's new lieutenant held out a single envelope. 'To Omar'

He recognized your handwriting instantly, and he breathed shakily, his heart sinking. He reached for the letter, and politely thanked Aldo. Omar looked at those two words: To Omar...

But he never read the rest. He stuffed the envelope away into a pocket inside his jacket... Omar knew there was greatness in his path, but if he read what you'd written, he'd never stop thinking of the moment he said goodbye to you. ***TWO YEARS LATER The basterds knew he never worked up the courage to read what you'd last wanted him to know. Just as none of the basterds were allowed to mess around with Donny's bat, none of them were allowed to touch the letter. But, their time together was coming to an end... And, seeing the inherent danger that was part of Operation Kino, Aldo sat Omar down. "I was younger than you are now, when I was given my first command..." It wasn't often that any of the basterds saw Aldo being so bleak... Blunt, yes. Of course. All the time, unfortunately. But bleak? It startled Omar a little... He looked at Aldo, at the history in that man's eyes. Aldo looked down, and Omar could see the heaviness in the memories of that first command. He'd witnessed their deaths firsthand in an endless massacre... "You know, son...Took me time to realize that each of 'em boys I lost that first day had someone waitin' on 'em to get back home. A mama, a pop, kid brother that might have to take his place, a sister workin' away in a factory instead of goin' to school. Each of 'em boys had someone they loved, someone waiting. Just like you. Y/n's waitin' on you to come on back home." "Come on, Aldo. Not now..." "Andy's mother didn't get to say goodbye. Simon had a wife and kids. Michael never got to marry." Omar turned away, he didn't want to listen. "We don't get to decide which one of us lives, dies. We don't even get to decide which one of us tells each other's stories." Aldo sighed, shaking his head. He wasn't making the same mistakes again. he knew who each of the basterds was. There was no turning back now. The war either ended with Kino, or not at all. But, seeing as some of them may not be so lucky to tell the stories, he looked at Omar, "You should read that letter now, Omar." Omar tried to play dumb....but he was a terrible liar, "What letter?" "Y/n's letter." Aldo got up, and walked out. Omar sighed, he pulled the letter out. To Omar. He shook his head. He knew he wouldn't be able to bear reading your 'I love you,' now. Not after all this time. Not when he was so close to hearing it again. He knew the basterds could win the war. There was greatness in each and every soldier he fought side by side with, but this was it. Operation Kino would go down in the books, and history had its eyes on each and every single one of them.

The thoughts lingered on, until the next night, as the basterds waited in an empty building, while Wicki, Hugo, and Lt. Hicox met with a contact in a tavern across the street. La Louisiane just so happened to be in a basement. As it would turn out, Aldo was right. Basements were a terrible place for a rendezvous. Omar, who was just about to read your letter (for real, this time) had no choice. He dropped it, when he heard the first gun shot. As the basterds ran out to see what basterds and parts of Kino they could save, Aldo spotted the letter on the ground. He saw a few words as he hastily tried to shove the letter back into the envelope as he ran out. He slowed down for a second, then realized he needed to make sure Omar made it home. His eyes scanned the street, as Omar kicked down the door. Aldo ran toward him, "WAIT." He pushed Omar back, and took his place, being the first to head down to the tavern as they heard more gunfire, and a terrified man scream, "YOU OUTSIDE, WHO ARE YOU?! BRITISH? AMERICAN? WHAT!" Aldo looked back at his boys, with a shot of relief in his eyes for  a moment, thinking there was a chance their boys were still alive, though his hand gripped the envelope tightly, as he shouted down, "WE'RE AMERICAN. WHAT ARE YOU?" *****

Later that night, as the basterds gathered around a veterinarian's clinic, Aldo quietly slipped the letter into Omar's hands. You had married him, just a year before he left... and he'd been gone for two years now. And now, after two years, he regretted not reading the letter when he first got it. When you decided to write that last letter to him, you'd known for some time... You weren't sorry, but you knew he'd keep on fighting. And still, you knew he deserved a chance to meet his baby. Still, you weren’t scared. You knew who you married. You'd written that last  line with a slight smile: "As long as you come home some day, at the end of the war, just to meet your son...that would be enough." Omar shut his eyes. He stopped hearing Wicki, Hugo, and Archie being operated on by a veterinarian with no morphine. He stopped hearing von Hammersmarck's explanations. He could only see you, in your little apartment in Jersey. He could see you standing by the window, on that last cool summer evening you spent together. You were smiling at him, almost laughing, as a breeze came through a cracked window, swaying the curtains gently. "Well. I speak the most I-talian so...I'll be your escort. Donowitz speaks second most, so he'll be your I-talian cameraman. Omar third most so he'll be Donny's assistant." Omar's eyes shot open, hearing the plans now, instead of his distant memories.  "I don't speak Italian!" "Like I said, third best. Just keep your fuckin' mouth shut!" As the night went on, and the plans were rearranged, Omar was sitting alone in a separate room. His mind bounced endlessly between the prospects of ending the war, and the words in your letter. For two years...two years he carried that letter, and never knew he had a baby waiting along with you. Now that you were so close to him, there was a chance he'd never get to you. Aldo knew what was going on. "Ya know...I saw sum' that letter. We can switch you out. Hirschberg or Smitty. Both of 'em boys got enough grit. Hell, they made it this far." "Smitty's got two kids who know him. Hirschberg is a kid."

Aldo nodded slowly as he sat by him.  He glanced up, "Donny!" Donny stopped by the doorway in passing, chewing on some stale bread he found lying around.  "Yeah?" "Come here. We got a slight change of plans." It was crazy, and it was almost dead certain it wouldn't work...but Aldo wanted to give them even a possibility to make it out. "Listen up, boys. This ain't no game..." So, later on, when Bridget von Hammersmarck arranged for the boys to be fitted in suits for the premier, Omar and Donny were alone for a few minutes, just before 'show time'.

"Y'know, kid. Aldo told me why we changed plans." Omar smiled a little, though his heart was heavier now, more than ever, "Of course he did. Aldo can't keep a secret." Donny nodded, knowing that to be true enough. Still, he sighed, "I just wanted to tell you, I respect the hell out of you, and there's nobody else I'd rather be doin' this mission with."

"Thanks, pal." "But..." Donny looked at his best friend, "Nothin's ever gone according to plan with us. Someone always slips up. Sometimes Hirschberg actually slips... That time that Wicki forget the ammunition, or when Hugo-" "I get it, I get it," Omar laughed, and Donny smiled a little, until he said what was on his mind. "It's a goddamn miracle any of us are still here." "Ain't that the truth." "So, if I fall behind, I stay behind. You get the hell out of there." "Donny, I can't do that." "Don't make an orphan of your kid." Donny was dead serious. "What about-" Donny already knew what Omar was going to say. He chuckled a little, "Shit, me 'n Sarah been engaged so long, I'd hope she'd be ready to move on by now," He smiled a little, though Omar knew Donny loved his girl, he still meant every word. "Donny, I can't leave you behind." "That's an order, private." "Don't do that." "Don't disobey a direct order, then." They looked at each other, quietly, not knowing what more to say. Donny reached his hand out. Omar sighed, and shook Donny's hand, "One last time?" "One last time," Donny smirked, looking in a mirror, slicking back his hair, then heading out the door.

*** And of course, things did not go as planned, as per usual. Somewhere in the middle of it all, Aldo disappeared, along with Bridget von Hammersmarck. To make matters worse...a wooden beam fell over Omar.

He shut his eyes, feeling the weight of the world fall over him. He just took down the nazi regime, but he was sure he'd never get to see you again. Smoke filled his lungs, and covered his eyes. He could almost hear you, a whisper among the crackles of the fire. He smiled... But he just couldn't seem to die. He saw you again, on that last cool summer night, just before he left. He kissed you, 'I'll be back before you know I'm gone...' And it wasn't like him to lie to you. So you never questioned that last promise, no matter how much time had passed. He knew that, so when he heard Donny shout over the roaring fire, "FUCK A DUCK," he opened his eyes. Donny was towering over him, "THIS WASN'T PART OF THE DEAL, OMAR." Donny was clearly hurt, but using every last ounce of his strength to push the beam off of Omar. "WE GOT THIRTY SECONDS, MOVE, MOVE MOVE." The two basterds just jumped out of the cinema, moments before the explosions. Donny chuckled, catching his breath, and pressing his arms around his hurt knee, "Just like in the movies, huh?" "Yeah..." Omar smiled, out of breath, realizing he was getting that happy ending,  "Just like in the movies..." A jeep stopped just across the street, and Hirschberg waved out the windo, "LET'S GO. GENERAL MADE A DEAL WITH ALDO AND LANDA." The boys looked at each other, and Hirschberg rolled his eyes, "WE GOTTA GO." Wicki poked his head out of the back of the jeep, along with Hicox and Hugo, "C'mon, boys. I got my mother waitin' for me." Hicox chuckled, "Yes, if it's all fine with you boys, I'd like to be home in time for my daughter's bed time story. She reads to me, you know." Hugo only smiled. He had somebody waiting for him too. They helped Donny and Omar up, and for the first time in years, each of the basterds took a breath. They looked around, knowing how lucky they were to be alive right now. ******** Omar walked down the stage after getting his medal of honor. He was a little slow, having a broken rib or two, but that didn't matter. You knocked the breath out of him. You'd always taken his breath away. He stopped when he saw you. You ran to him. He could barely whisper your name, though you could see the years of love that were missed in his eyes, "Y/n..." You threw your arms around him, effectively taking his taking his breath away again, though he didn't mind. He glanced back at Aldo, who was already being swarmed by a group of reporters, waiting for him to tell the basterds' story, or at least the story of how he got his scar. Aldo smiled with pride, nodding at his boys, watching them all go their separate ways. Yes, they'd lost some basterds along the way... Aldo was right. No one got to choose who lived, who died, who told their stories. (But knowing Donny, he'd tell some stories alright, and never shut up about it.) But now, Omar looked at what was ahead of him. He saw a little boy, about two years old, lingering shyly behind you. You picked him up, and Omar saw his son's face for the first time. "His name's Philip." Omar threw his arms around both of you, never wanting to let go. He'd seen the world, remembered every soldier who fought by his side, held on to that letter for years, and lived far more than he'd ever imagined ....But this? He smiled, holding you and your son, knowing he'd never have to leave you behind again. He looked at you, and Philip... That was enough for a lifetime. He fought in the war, but somehow, this was what he was proudest of. He'd always known he'd see you again, it would only be a matter of time.

[kny111]

I know I haven’t really updated on here. Fatherhood can be really tiring and time consuming as it is a blessing and will change who you are for the better, at least for me. I’ve been away from a lot of the subjects I used to normally post about until recently, that’s because I picked up the energy and interest for science journalism again. To say I went off to have a long waited talk with nature is to minimize greatly the kind of transformations I’ve undergone. The mysteries she’s shown me far greater than any cosmic unknown that I could have ever imagined of. I know a lot of the folks who used to follow this blog might be surprised to know that within that journey I’ve seen, experienced and have been in communion with some really influential spirits of old. Nature’s hidden variables. Whatever you want to call it. Something occurred when I decided to take more seriously the religions and spirituality of my ancestors. Something that only reinvigorated my love for science and the unknown, physics, art, and expression of these things for beneficial communal use. I’m from Quisqueya, the first testing grounds for colonialism and subsequently the evolution of neo-colonialism. Not too long after and we become one of the first pit stop for the trans-Atlantic slave trading markets to proliferate and spin the rest of the world off into the white supremacist capitalist patriarchy hell branch of a reality we know of today. Our little island has undergone so many transformations and inclusion of peoples, cultures, so many I only recently found out of like how Haitians took in Jewish refugees during the time of Hitler’s nazism. Because I still deal with mental health issues and depression being one I’ve had since childhood, I sometimes don’t have near enough energy to convey how have things been going since my last big update here. My spiritual and religious journey, finding comfort in myself and closure in ways I no longer adhere to. That said I found it beyond amazing how earlier today on October the 14th ‘Indigenous Peoples Day‘ I was drumming away to Tainx music without realizing what day today was without looking at my social media feeds yet. Here I was normally thinking I’m so tired, down and out of trying to keep these cultures alive and I was already doing so instinctively in the truest way I know how.

Like I mentioned, I decided to take more seriously my Afro-Indigenous roots and what it meant to be a Black Dominican Haitian Taino American. It took me on the wildest ride with the unlikeliest subject ranging from seeing quantum entanglement examples right before my eyes, seeing living breathing afrofuturism through my Vodun, Catholic, Christian roots and the functionality of Vodun to incorporate so many ancient parts of being Black into what intuitively led me down a road of self and outward knowledge on the cosmos around me. To then blend these epigenetically installed formulas of spirituality embededd in me by history and nature, incorporate them into my expression of art and self which is one has been like achieving a life long dream I didn’t even know I had. I did so much intuitive shit that was so clearly linked to my identity as an Afro-Indigenx American immigrant along the way that I had erected an altar without knowing it was an altar. I would section and compartmentalize this prototype altar so beautifully and had no clue I was paying respects to my ancestors and spirits of the world until more recently a few months back. When I realized this, it was like a Cambrian explosion occurred in me. I don’t want to get into the details of the abilities it brought out that I already had in me due to prying eyes (ahem surveillance capitalist patriarchy is still outchea at large) but to simply meditate and think on my folks has given me such a renewed and strengthened sense of intuition and appreciation for the past and future that I never knew existed. Sometimes I’ll legit write and prophesize shit out the ass like it’s a normal day it’s wild, shit I never believed in but the science seems to check out with quantum physics and what not. That’d be an explanation for another time. The altar has now evolved to a place I can really go to and express but at the same time it’s something I’ve learned to keep within my own self so that it’s not the altar that’s important, rather the changes I’ve gone through to get to such a place. I write, dream, visualize, laugh, act, improvise, predict based on science, meditate, heal, rehabilitate myself there. But conversely the world speaks to me there, the spirits of old, new, those to be. I know it sounds type wild but it’s gotten normal for me to experience something my old science nerd ass self woulda made fun of me for. But when you get into a connection with ya ancestors like I have and reach the conclusions and deductions I have on the systems that control the planet it gets clearer to see that the Indigenous were right all along on colonialism, it’s gotto go. There’s no place for it in the future if we’re to survive a planet seemingly becoming another Venus. I’d like to think we not gone be fighting each other while some catastrophe bop our asses one time like they did the dinos. That’s one of the main messages they keep tellin me and it’s hard to refute. I’ll try and continue this update on another day as there’s so much in between and concepts and ideas I wanna share about how to move forward on activism and using art to get our ideas about those movements across. The above images span from months, just small droplets of the cool ass journey I been on just trying to maintain some normalcy while playing my part in not helping oppressors of any kind continue proliferating their systems of domination and subjugation. So this first image is from the week not too long ago when I had 2 honey bees flying in and checking out the altar. Then I left an old jar of honey that still had some and they’d return and eat some for like a good week or so. At one point, this matrix-like moment happens when one of them goes into the jar and makes this cool sound I never heard before. The bee had gone in there before many times and never made that specific sound, it was like a lower frequency conch shell or something. When I checked the time it was like 1:23pm or 1:11pm one of those. I was like..... get Neo!! shit was so cool. This next image is really a culmination of my search to learn more about my Afro-Indigenousness which led me to learn more about my Haitianness and the spirituality and religion. From painting Papa Legba paintings before I even knew him, to giving respects to all types of 21 division spirits and Vodun loa before ever even knowing of them. It was as if each part of these religions was trying to show me how much of them was in me in how intuitively I’d gravitate towards these religions despite being still very devoted to science and scientific literacy worldwide. Idk it’s just been a really cool blending of a lot of things I never thought could come together. I found this moth around the time I was reading and thinking deeply on the creator entity in Vodun and some African religions, Gran Maitrex. I’ve always had an interest in creator stories and beings so  when this Golden Moth popped up in the altar (right on the mat I have laid in front of it, facing it, as if it came there to spend its last moments) I was like a little kid. To me it reminds me of those mysteries we’ve yet to discover that can help us in our path to heal ourselves and others if we chose to. The following two are from my walking meditating sessions by the river. They have slightly deeper stories to em about relaxation, overcoming obstacles, predictions I made that day about the sky that I wont get into on here cause it’s exhausting lol. The next image with the wooden branch I brought in from a forest walk is of one of the bees I spoke of flying around the Afro-Indigenx/ Ancient Egypt/ West Africa section of the altar. It did this several times enough for me to note that it liked that particular area. Following non repeating image is of the portrait I did a while back for the Heath Gallery in Harlem on Rein-visioning Brown and Black Bodies in Scifi: Story of 4 Tainx sisters calling for their descendants to help them from the demonic wrath of colonialism. This picture I took when I finally got to take my ass out to jog after a whole day of being a dad. I found a neat tree to try and climb at night and found this beautiful bright green grasshopper right by the branch I picked. Grasshoppers always remind me of giant leaps I could be taking forward. The following image I took during another forest walk when I looked up and saw this cool cross shape juxstapositioned among the trees. Last image I took during the Medieval festival they hold at Fort Tryon every year. It’s where I sold my awesome Medieval chicken paintings (which have now taken place at altar where I give em much love) last year dressed as Obi Wan Kenobi. This year I decided to just enjoy it with bae and did so dressed as Jedi Jesus posing as a Dominican Fryer. More pics on that to come. Just wanted to update yall on the spiritual in case anyone could use these words to benefit em. Yall take care. - Ken

[cantbgirlie2]

When u grow up in a small town you don't know how strange the damn place is until you move away. Like "wow, your football field is the right size?" is one thing but "wow, your police chief doesn't frame people and control the growing drug ring?"

"Wow, towns with less than five hundred people arent supposed to have so much crime that the fbi set up shop?"

"Hey, so which neighborhood should I avoid?

"Huh?"

"Which house do I avoid so I don't get shot or stabbed to death?"

"Wow, you don't wake up every night to druggies having a slap fight?"

"Do you, also, assume any house that catches fire was a meth house?"

"What did your school do when students made threats against other students?"

"They were suspended at the very least."

"Ah, see, there was this one kid. Held a knife to a younger boys throat."

"What happened?"

"Oh nothing. A week later he brought a lighter to school and tried to set a kid on fire."

"My teacher beat me with a rule in front of my entire class. Police went around, questiondd the kids. Everybody said it was true."

"What happened to him?"

"Oh nothing. Police framed my mother for injuring some folks that attempted to murder her. And made her drop charges against the teacher or go to jail. Ya know, the usual."

"The fuck?"

"Dad was abusin us but was known as a model citizen. He would scream so loud the neighbors would call police but even after mom was in the hospital nobody ever bothered to ask why I couldnt speak or look up from my shoes."

"Wow, the church people arent absolute assholes that steal the donation money?"

"What's the restaurant in your town?"

"Huh? Which one?"

"Youve got multiple?!"

"Did your science teacher also have flesh eatong beatles he used to decompose bodies?"

"The fuck?"

"Only coyotes, he said. Never new since the first week of a new corpse the closet door was bolted shut."

"One of my teachers was an alcoholic who had to go to rehab after having a meltdown the first week of school. Surprise! He was actually one of the nicer teachers!"

"What would you do if a kid across from you table keeps spitting tobacco on your shoes?"

"Why would anybody chew tabacco in class? They'll get arrested?"

*nervous laughter as I wipe off my shoes.*

"Somebody looked up porn in the school library. You know, the one that grades 1-12 share."

"What happened."

"The mouse was sticky."

"So how do normal people handle borderline abusive teachers?"

"Avoid them?"

"Really? I befriended mine. Complemented her at every opportunity. Ask for help. Go out of my way to say good morning to her every morning. Eventually she couldnt stay mad at me and would give me treats."

"You manipulated your way out of abuse?"

"When did you town deside to go out of their way to poison bees?"

"Never wtf?"

"Oh yeah, we had a play ground, couple basketball hoops. There were lotsa bats that would hang around agianst the school way up just below the roof ledge. Kids used to chuck basketballs at 'em then stomp them to death."

*Speech teacher at 14 because I stopped speaking*

*starts speaking again.*

"God why do you talk so much!" Says everybody.

*stops speaking again.*

"I cant tell if I'm adhd, add, or traumatized but I've worked continuously since my first job at 14 and still cant afford food let alone a therapist."

"Hey, did your school ever burn to the ground mysteriously overnight and have to be rebuilt but now it has super strange secret rooms that you can't enter but, according to the layout of the building, definitely exist."

"...no."

"My church hired an older lady to teach Sunday school. Teach what was in the bible, but whats not in the bible? Dinosaurs. She refused to believe they existed despite us living in fuckin MONTANA. A land locked state, yet when ya go a dig up the land for building you get seashells and fossils mixed in the dirt.

Fuckin idiot, that one."

"So when does yer skate rink open?"

"The one conected to the arcade?"

"The wAHuH???"

"Do yall have problems with folks from other contries too?"

"Are you some fuckin racist?"

*me, thinking back to when several vans full of canadians came down, got drunk 'nd high, and tried to set town square on fire.* "I don't think so?"

We had one (1!) family of black folks. Two kids, both younger than me. Adults treated them normally but the fuckin kids thought they were magic. Like everybody was an orange and along came these two apples and everybody lost their shit.

Got hit by a car once. Nobody cared and i eent to school the next day. Might have briannddamfgen

Was in wrestling. That's when I relaized that I do, in fact, have brain damage.

"Fuckin piece of shit kids, am I right? How many friends have bullied you over your traumatic experiences?"

"I think you need new friends."

"Fair enough."

[bogmonsters]

got tagged by @somewhat-human--mostly-bitter!! so sorry for not doin this earlier, i was busy fuckin up in aa2  

under the cut bc its kinda late and i’m chatty as always!! these are all really good questions so it took me like 2 days to come up w good answers. oops

- Post the rules (consider it done!!)

- Answer the questions given to you by the tagger

- Write eleven questions of your own

- Tag eleven people

what’s a crappy experience you had that you don’t regret because it made for a funny story?

oh gosh. oh gosh oh gosh i have like 40 stories like that. my personal favorite involves checking the temp of a tray of french fries during a class at a super fancy cooking school (bc my grandma insisted i absolutely must learn how to cook and then signed me up for this thing before i could get a single word in). i took a tray out of the oven, set it down, and then for whatever reason my brain was like golly gee i wonder if this piping hot tray that came straight out of the oven is hot??? so i just put my entire fucking bare hand on the side of it. the pain didn’t register until an instructor asked what the fuck i was doing. someone asked how hot the fries were. all i could say was “hot”    

can you write a sad story with just one word?

i’m far from a writer but i’m of the belief that the saddest word in the english language is “hopeless”

maybe one day i’ll be eloquent enough to explain why that is but alas... now is not the time

if your safety was guaranteed, would you punch a jerk?

dude hell fuckin yea!! i can’t guarantee that it’d be a good punch bc i have small ass baby hands but i’d punch someone even if i was endangering myself tbh

how would you survive the hunger games?

i’d hide, probably!! i’m super tiny irl and if i’m good at anything it’s keeping my mouth shut & being quiet. i was never much of a talker until super recently  

would you rather spend the rest of your life with a hollywood satanist or a hollywood mafia boss?

am i allowed to choose both? i kinda like both. i just hope neither of em are jerks   

do you have local slang that people from other places would find strange?

im not entirely sure if this qualifies as slang but it’s become something of a running joke among friends to see how horribly we can pronounce a word before it becomes incomprehensible (i.e. ‘canada’ becomes ‘kuh-naw-der’)

immortality (cannot die) or invulnerability (cannot be killed)?

this. this is a really good fucking question and my answer is i have absolutely no idea. probably invulnerability? i probably wouldn’t be such a scaredy cat if i couldn’t be killed  

i initially wrote up an entire paragraph about why i’d choose immortality (i wanna see the fate of the human race and what’ll come after us, etc etc) but if i can never die then eventually there’s gonna be a point in time where i’m completely and totally alone in the universe and that scares the shit out of me

how many Star Wars movies can you name off the top of your head?

not many... i’ve only watched like 2 star wars movies in my entire life. the only ones i know are the empire strikes back, a new hope, revenge of the sith, the last jedi, and the force awakens (and the last two don’t even really co0unt bc they were released super recently)  

your weapon of choice?

if i could use anything regardless of skill level, i’d def use a glaive or a giant halberd bc those are cool as fuck 

hogwarts houses are okay, but what’s your ilvermorny house?

the test i just took says i’m a thunderbird!! i had no idea ilvermorny houses were a thing til now but im so super into thunderbirds. my heart yearns for adventure

what’s a motto?

i used to have a personal motto at age 13 and it was something like prepare to be disappointed! or i’m hot garbage! but 2018 is the year of getting my shit together so rn i’m in the mood for something like punch the future in the face

get ready for my dumb ass questions 

what’s the last song that made you cry?

if us humans achieve true enlightenment (where all questions about the universe have been answered), what’s next for us to do?

what’s your opinion on bees?

is it better to love people & lose them or to never love at all?

if you had to be an animal crossing villager, what animal would you be? what would your house look like?

have you ever had a crush on a fictional character? 

when’s the last time you were super excited? 

what’s your favorite flavor of ice cream? do you usually get ice cream in a cup or in a cone?

does everything absolutely need to have a meaning, or do some things just exist for the sake of existing?

what’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?

is a slug a snail without a shell or is a snail a slug with a shell?

i’ll tag @typhonserpent​, @perpetuallyimmobile, @biinks, @go-to-hella-del-rey, @yarnpika, @southerneuropeanboi, @bunaii, @pkmn-lillie, @startinik, @random-minty, and @pkpanta!! yall definitely don’t have to answer all these if you don’t want to! stay rad!! 

[surviveatitlan]

Episode 3 - I’m Literally Googling How to Protect Myself From Hexes - Francie

Francie

I'm literally googling how to protect myself from hexes

Yep!! Two tribes of 9!! I know a ton of ppl on this tribe so that should help but like, I still gotta be careful lmao. I'm gonna try not to work too closely with Emily because I don't want to hear any bs about "premades" like the last game we played together

i am literally hosting/was hosting (in tim's case) half this tribe + emily is my cohost rn wtfffff omg

Tim

So everything was going goood in my old tribe and all of a sudden we SWAP? I was not readyyyy. Like we were gonna rule the game as a tribe of 5. Tolimàn was robbed by one point yall.

Francie

the original acatenango peeps (the aca tacos) are trying to get tim and autumn to work with us rn so lets hope we can get this group together and have it be solid. autumn has no og tribemates left so that might help us. people to be wary of: heather and emily, both individually and as a duo bc I know that they adore each other so I can totally see them being a duo I gotta downplay my attachment to the aca tacos, esp my ride or die olivia

Allan

I'm really glad this swap happened. I really didn't feel accepted by my first tribe and I know if we went to Tribal, I'd most likely be out. Now I have the chance to make new allies. My strategy is to tell them that I didn't bond with my old tribe at all and hope that they see me as an opportunity for an alliance.

Tim

Me after seeing this challenge: https://confsnavarino.tumblr.com/post/171111635506 ITS ACTUALLY FUNNY GO CHECK IT OUT LOL

Francie

yep. tim/autumn/sammy/olivia/me alliance is a thing now. fingers crossed

Tim

Fill me up will alllll your propaganda. This is my second chance and I'm ready to get to the end.

Jay Bee

Honestly I think this swap has put me in a good position. I know enough people well enough to have options, but not well enough that I think I'll be targeted because of it. I have no idea who the fuck I'm going to align with though. The idea of Rebecka/Madison is scary, and Timmy says Rebecka/Dan is also a thing. I trust Timmy for some reason (I'm a meninist #exposed). OKAY so here's a swap assessment night 1: Timmy - Like I said, idk why but I Trust Ha. Hopefully he's not secretly a rat Bryan - A grade a Good Boy. Would definitely like to align with him. We just called for like half an hour so I'm hoping to nail down a relationship there. Brian - Um? I guess he's pretty new, which I think is good. I think he's really the only person on this tribe with no preconceived notions of me or other people Rebecka - Love her to death but SCARED of her relationship with Madison Madison - Same Dan - Seems okay, but I know he's friends with Rebecka so we love a core trio AnnMarie - please work with me Nick - Nobody seems to like him. I think he'll go if we lose, which is at least convenient if not good. Debating if I want to work with him just so that I'm not on the bottom. Rebecka proposed a me/Rebecka/Madison/Timmy/Bryan alliance but honeslee? I think in that formation I'm on the bottom, unless I can get Timmy and Bryan to want to work together with me. Anyway as usual I'm screaming.

Autumn

Me coming home to a bunch of strangers in my tribe https://media.giphy.com/media/nLhdSinRtaL2E/giphy.gif Y'all snatched my whole family and I should be pissed but like I'm really here for this new group so I won't turn up (maybe). Tim is my son, I love Francie, Olivia, and and Sammy already, Heather and Allan seem cool, and then Emily and I are on good terms again lmao. No comment on Jacob. So I come into tribe with all these new people, I'm juggling 7 conversations, and then Francie was like hitting me up for an alliance. I say yeah I really trust you and less than a minute later I'm in an alliance w/ Francie, Tim, Olivia, AND Sammy aka everyone I love? Nut the admins did me a favor https://media1.giphy.com/media/OTbo92zetdsha/giphy.gif

Timmy

This tribe swap is the best thing to ever happen. I actually know where I stand with Rebecka which is great. I know she will always have Dan's interests over mine so that is something I need to think about long-term, but for now it is okay because we are working together. Right now my number 1 is still Jay, I just have a really good feeling about Jay. Bryan worries me because he is an amazing player and I did vote him out in Alaska so who knows if he is bitter about that but we're talking right now so that is good. The second I saw Madison on the cast reveal I knew that I wanted to work with her because we did not get to in Himalayas and I knew ever since then that I wanted to work with her. She is messy and consistently messy but that could be good for me. Might as well have her on my side because if she isn't then I could go fast. But this tribe is amazing, best tribe swap ever!

Jay Bee

I honestly have no idea where the balance between cracked and inactive is!!!! Do you just.,.,.,..,not talk to people? I don't understand. I'm screaming. Help.

Francie

we're towards the end of this challenge i swear to god if jacob doesnt come online in time and fucking costs us this challenge.......

Jay Bee

We're doing the challenge right now and I'm SO DAMN STRESSED. I have a very hard time trying to let other people handle things and trusting others in general, so this is a special kind of hell. I can't believe this season supports underage binge drinking AND I can't believe I wish I were actually drunk. Send help.

Autumn

Candle king walking into Atitlan tonight? Sounds A-lit-lan https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2015-01/7/16/enhanced/webdr08/anigif_enhanced-20692-1420664628-12.gif https://em.wattpad.com/f6983ef619f199370692a5d6aa61048004415cc4/68747470733a2f2f73332e616d617a6f6e6177732e636f6d2f776174747061642d6d656469612d736572766963652f53746f7279496d6167652f5a6e503033794868705a68795a673d3d2d3437393237303538382e313465626162373863366266356435353733373138343330393837362e676966?s=fit&w=1280&h=1280

Tim

So I FORGOT TO CONFESS HAHAHAH But this tribe swap puts me in a seemingly good spot my tribe seems strong and capable! An alliance was formed by Olivia that consists of her, me, Francie, Sammy and Autumn.  I doubt that it will last simply due to the fact that it was based on absolutely nothing game wise. Im looking forward to working with Autumn closely as well as Emily so theres that! The 99 bottles challenge was intersecting as Jay would say. IT FUCKNG STRESSED ME THE FUCK OUT. It felt like I was micromanaging a little Ceasers or something. Making the lists AND posting at the same time?? Allan messed up but it was no big deal at all. JAKE DISAPPEARED ON US which sucks heavilyyyyyyy. Hes prob going if we lose again. Hopefully. ANYWAYS THAT reward challenge is giving me multiple strokes and gastreoarthritis or some shit like that lmao. I lieterally fel like Cirie in that one episode where she kept falling of of that balance beam. Im such a comp flop I mean the only comp I can win is Mastermind and thats if im lucky.

Nick

ABOUT TRIBE SWAP so we get into our new times and ONCE AGAIN all the people im close with exception for madison and timmy IS ON THE OTHER TRIBE AHH. Dan and Rebeckka hate me for the drama we had a month ago or so. Timmy is good friends with Dan and Beckka from what I know so like im probably screwed if we dont win the challenge. SO yeahhh this will be interesting I want my old tribe back LOLOL

Tim

So I forgot to mention that Em and I were sharing letters and so that at least lets me know that she is interested in working with meee. Also im gonna lie and say I didnt get a letter because I didnt attempt fhjksk s (Reward challenge that is)

Nick

CHALLENGE so we lost the semi live challenge .. kind of embarassing like too We had this whole plan set up and it got ruined Now i am going to tribal and welll if im voted out then i wont be surprised. Hopefully I have been proving myself helpful in challenges so hopefully im kept around longer #prayfornick

Jay Bee

This tribal is gonna be batshit!! Literally twenty minutes ago everyone was like "let's just go nick" but now I'm really Thinking About It and. That would be stupid. If you look at Madison/Dan/Rebecka as a trio (with Rebecka/Madison as a core duo OR Rebecka/Dan as a core duo) and with Bryan as kind of a gentle soul sucking their teet (love u bryan), then that's a solid group of 4. If Timmy and I (I guess I'm a meninst now bc we're f2 or some shit) go with that group, leaving out Brian and AnnMarie, to vote out Nick, that puts the two of us on the bottom of a 6-person alliance. The next tribal could be 4 vs. 4. If we save Nick, however, and vote off Rebecka - therefore voiding both the madison/rebecka duo and the dan/rebecka duo, thus destroying the trio - the next tribal could be 5 vs. 3 and we won't have one of the biggest social threats still in the game with two of her closest allies up with her. I think that would put me in a much better position long-term because I really need a core group of people who aren't ingrained with Emily/Francie/Heather/Olivia come a merge situation where it's my kids vs. me. Timmy, Brian, AnnMarie, and (unfortunately) Nick could be an integral part of that. Especially Brian, since he's new. I can use new. I need to keep around players who don't know me that well.

Timmy

Jay is cracked and I love her for it. We are playing so messy and are in alliances with literally the entire tribe. Love being a swing vote. Splitting up Rebecka and Dan is going to be a great move, it will suck personally and Dan will give me a lot of shit for it (and Rebecka might too) but it is just a game so have to have fun and being a mess is fun to me. Might as well be toward the top of a group than knowing I'm at the bottom of the group of 4 (Dan/Rebecka/Madison/me). I'm really just hoping this doesn't hurt me having a relationship with Madison at some point because I still want to work with her. The only worry in the plan is Brian because who knows what goes on in his head but I know he isn't controlled by Rebecka who is just telling everyone her plan and adding people to alliances without asking. Like I never said I was okay with her/dan/madison (I was happy to have a group, but a better one came along). All in all though, Jay is my number one so whatever benefits us both is what I am here for.

Brian

Its still eh. Some people are fake and there is so much pre-season relationships that i'm so oof. BUT i dont wanna be in the minority and if joining a make shift alliance helps, i'm down for it. 

Bryan

Woo ok so we lost. That sucks. But I’m in an alliance with rebecka, dan, jay, Madison, and Timmy. And our goal is to vote out nick. I’m fine with that operative. He already talked about wanting to go against me rebecka and dan so like oops. I also love Annemarie. I need at least one person outside that alliance and that is her. 

Allan

THANK GOD WE WON THAT CAUSE I FUCKED UP. But like seriously, I was so scared that we were gonna lose and I was gonna be at fault for it. Tbh I'm a little annoyed cause it really feels like Tim and I did all the work and when we asked other people to take over, no one offered. It really makes a bit dubious about trusting my tribe.

Olivia

Woohoo! We won immunity! I am just so happy about that. I have a nice sweet little alliance going with the three aca tacos and another one with us three and tim and autumn. Autumn is all alone and idk Tim's relationship with Allan. Tim Allan. Ahahahahhhaha. Anyways. Jacob's ass was GONE if we hadn't won. He is still my target should we lose the next one. I also did Pancreas and got a 29 minute score which I am assuming is terrible but who knows. I love Emily and Heather but I know for a fact, without confirmation, those two are working together. Emily has fawned over Heather since isle of skye and I just know they're a pair. I love both SO MUCH  but i can't fully trust either. I thought for sure that being on a tribe with heather and tim, two close friends of mine, we'd immediately bond and become our new ride or dies. lol. but i think i can still work with both maybe but i like the 5 i already have so i guess we will see. how is it i have two idols, an extra vote, and i won immunity in another org but this one i got THIRTY MINUTES at Pancreas. oh well.

Heather

I have not confessed about my new tribe yet. I am now on the Atitlan tribe which is fun, and I have Emily who is a queen. Plus now I have some of my Isle of Skye people. I've missed playing with Olivia so  much, ughh love of my life. And Tim is such an iconic king. Also Jacob from my other tribe, who has been inactive recently. Gotta do other impressions too Francie: I love them with all my hort. What a perfect bean. Allan: Seems super chill but immediately went into game talk Autumn: A sweetheart ughh my love. Saved our ass in the challenge like 5 times. Sammy: He likes musical theatre so I love him. nuff said AND WE WON OUR FIRST CHALLENGE TOGETHER WHICH IS FUN SO YEET

Dan

So this is a damn mess, I really want to trust that Nick doesn't have a secret majority alliance against me and Beckka because I don't know why literally everyone would just lie, ya know? But I wouldn't be surprised if it happens honestly. I think Beckka would go over me???? But like that's the ugliest thing ever. I don't know why Jay would make an alliance with most of the people in the game if it wasn't a solid thing, but like I'm still paranoid af. IT'S SO EARLY TO FLIP. 

AnnMarie

I am so glad we didn't have to complete the full challenge because that was something I did not want to do at all (sorry Cameron). The only.nad part is that we have to go to tribal. Nick's name has been flying from all directions, and it's the obvious easy vote, but Nick is saying that Dan and rebecka are a powerful team. Jay has said that as well, so I don't really know what may go down at tribal. What I do know is that Nick will probably be the person voted out, as long as nothing super dramatic happens in the tribe. I'm super close to Jay and she's just amazing, Dan's super nice, and I LOVE BRYAN OK HE IS SO NICE AND I HOPE HE DOESNT END UP BEING A JERK in the long run. I'm so happy that I get to play with these people, and I can't wait to start a good alliance in this game with them.

Jay Bee

Loyalty? Who's she?

I told Nick EXPLICITLY last night not to tell Madison about our plan or alliance because she would tell Dan and Rebecka. Today, I wake up to the intel (from Dan) that Nick told Madison about everything. And guess the fuck what!! She told Rebecka and Madison. I'M NOT DUMB, NICK! Thankfully they all thought Nick was trying to make a power play and they don't believe I'm with Nick. NICK DO YOU NOT REALIZE HOW CLOSE I AM TO SLITTING YOUR THROAT!!! If you're gonna be loose-lipped I'm going to have to vote you out! Ugh. This is such a prickly position. I would much rather work with Brian/AnnMarie/Timmy just because they don't know me as well as Rebecka and Madison (and to an extent Bryan through Emily) do. I'm trying to figure out who the most disenfranchised people on the tribe are and use them because if I can be their only source of trust, they're always going to be loyal to me. The problem is that I don't want the next tribal to be 4 vs. 4. That gets messy really fast. If I do vote for Nick in the big group of Madison/Rebecka/Bryan/Dan/Timmy, that puts me in an alliance with all the power players and leaves out AnnMarie and Brian, who would be much smarter to have on my side in a merge situation, unless I want to go meat shield tactic in this game. I don't know Ugh. Timmy, please come online so I can talk through all of this.

Rebecka and Dan

https://youtu.be/AUDFxIjAuZM

Amanda (Guest)

Hello! So I know I'm not playing this game, and Cameron probably won't post this, but I was SUPPOSED to play this game so I'm leaving a confessional anyway. Just here to say that Rebecka and Emily are the true icons of the season for having me in their host chats and that's all. Also Cam. I love Cam.

Sammy

I’m so glad that our team won woooooo

Emily

Omg I'm such a FLOP! I didn't realize I hadn't confessed so hey I'm in public speaking pretending to do my work! Anyways, super happy about our tribe winning the challenge. I really was thinking we were going to lose because of FUCKING JACOB! He like. Was not here. At all. Total flop. Major flop. I haven't even heard from him in like two days. WHY PLAY A SKYPE BASED GAME IF YOU DONT CHECK SKYPE REGULARLY??? Anyways, I recorded a cast assessment but it's a mess because I'm really sad in it and you can tell im a mess so im gonna type it bc you can't tell im upset when im typing!!!!!!!!!!! ALLAN: Really helpful in the challenge so I'm a stan! Hard to talk to I think but I'm really vibin him. I think he's gonna be a good asset to our tribe! Yay! I don't really have much to say about him right now AUTUMN: I'm going to PRAY that she's not bitter from All Stars. That was like a month ago and honestly get the fuck over it. You made a stupid move and it backfired on you! That's it. Don't make a stupid move against me this game and I'll work with you! I really like Autumn and I like how she plays but reading her Navarino confessions I can tell she's just someone that holds onto grudges for far too long and it's annoying. All Stars is not a good representation of my game. WORK WITH ME PLEASE FRANCIE: love of my life.... I said in the beginning I didn't want to work with them but I realized that if I want to work with Tim.... Francie is probably also gonna have to be my ally. Francie and I were also talking about how, if we lose, Jacob would be an easy vote because he's inactive! I know that a lot of people would be fine with that. Also, he hasn't competed in Pancho so I don't think he has any letters? Like he didn't even get the one from the rules? So no idol for Jacob. Easy vote. Bye bye. HEATHER: I'll sell my soul for Heather. My queen. I love her. Honestly I can't wait for her to snake me. Fucking queen. I just love her. If anyone targets her I'M COMING FOR THEIR ASS. STAY OFF HEATHER BYE BYE! JACOB: Inactive. Bye OLIVIA: I REALLY want to work with Olivia. I plan on making her my number one in this game. I just get such a good vibe from her. She seems intelligent, stealthy, and fun... that's what I want in an ally. She also has some good connections with other people and she's got a good social game. Definitely someone I want to work with and go far with. But, not too far because she'll win the game, but... I'm also trying to be loyal this game. Loyal to a fault makes people upset. So. I'm gonna have to decide. SAMMY: I played with him and Indonesia and led the charge to vote him out right before merge so like he could hate me? But he also voted for me to win the game. SO. I don't think he's bitter, but he knows I think he plays messy. He's super sweet though and I'm a stan. I gotta be careful what I leak to him, but I like him and can see myself working with him in the future. TIM: MY KING! I love Tim and want to work with Tim high key. He's such a sweetheart and I'm really hoping we can go far. I'd be so down for a little group of he, Olivia, and I. Is that proper grammar? I don't care. Anyways, I love how he plays and he's very well thought out and stuff so I'm really hoping we can go far together. I'm a Tim stan. A major Tim stan. It's still too early for me to for sure tell you who I'm working with (I usually go from round to round, but I don't want to do that this game. No flip-flopping this time unless it genuinely will be better for me AND others.) I'm really trying to refine how I play. I'm trying to be more honest. More social. More logical and strategic, but at the same time, not as PURELY strategic? I need to make sure my social game is phenomenal before I start going off and being a strategic mastermind. People won't listen to people they don't like, and they won't vote for them either. Whew. Okay I hope this super long confession makes up for my lack of confessing. Goodbye!

Jacob

I was asked to make a confession so here it is. I'm glad we won or I'd be screwed for falling asleep after inventory bleh.

Timmy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OolhMHA3F0o&feature=youtu.be

Emily

Finding out all these people's zodiac signs is very inch resting... I y'all I really do. Capricorns? Gotta go next. I don't stan. Bye bye.

Madison

WHOO okay last minute confessionals lemme hear you say WAYYYY HO!!!! Nick is the vote which like awk bc now we’re in another game together so sucks I guess. Also he came to me trying to vote puts rebecka though so like wtf bye bye. 

Rebecka

Me if I get voted out tonigt: Thank you dan and jay for being loyal. Thank you also the the people who voted me out now so I don't have to go through a bunch of other rounds of drama and lose xoxo 

[stonpoet-thestoneddisciple]

STON POET - TERRITORY PART 2

Uhh, I got the keys, I got da weed, I got da bees, I got the rhymes, I got the hoes, I got the hate, (I got the*2) fam, I got the love,, haaaaaaaaaa...

Uhh, niggas don't see, how I see mane, they can't be, round me never..Imma killa on these beats, don't care what I say man, if I cuss I cuss..Man I could do that man, they ain't doing what Im doing man..They going against me, don't wanna go against me thats terrible for yall yeah..

(Uhh*2) rockstar status, Ion need no air I can still breathe, REAL ANGEL nigga I can't ever see no grave..Im going pass the limit, Im pass space man, reaching up ta Heaven, tryna get it in yeah..

(Stacking it*2) up, yeah non (stacking it*2) up, (rolling it*2) up & smoking it quick (yeah*2)...They can't do what I do naw man they ain't us..OFTR we elitists yeah we da elites man, yeah we are LEADERS,, theyyy don't gotta understand..Just let this bang in your speakerss, burn good green too, like I said homie...

I got the keys, I got da weed, I got the hoes, I got the beef, I got da hate, I got the love, I got the, I got, I got the fame..(I got the*2) darkness all in me, nigga I got (so much*2), man nigga (they can't see*2)..

They blind they blinded, mann, I can't be (blinded*2) naww..Nan pussy can step ta my squad, & if they try they gone get fired, at..Fire, at em, (fire*2) at em, put them mutherfuckers on (fire*2) (yeah man*2)...

Like I said I got the keys, I got the weed, I got da hoes, I got da beef, I got da hate, I got the love, I got the eyes I got the wings, (I got da*2) dope, I got it all (mane*2) (yeah*2)...Haaaaaa, I saiiid I got it all (mane*2) yeah....

I got da hoes, I got the weed, I got the drinks, I got the kief..I got the o's I got the p's,, I got yall hoes I got the beef, I got the hate I got the love, I GOT MY TERRITORY..

And thats OFTR yeah mane...(Yeah*3) aye, aye,, haaaaaaaaaaaa..

[thebuttsmcgee]

Head. Hrut. I have lot to say

[gulescamisade]

Virginia:  Day 3

TAKODA: -they're all fueled up again and he's back to driving, but he's found another place for them to stop while he tries to figure out the best route to minnesota. he's noticed that a lot of major highways are blocked off by the military, so... it's probably best to avoid those. even if the condesce wants to toy with them as she is, there's no way of predicting anyone else's behavior.-

DEREK: -meanwhile, he's hovering around his brother. takes a seat next to him wherever he's at.- Hey.

DAVENFORTH: -He's been sitting here, thinking too much. Help him. At least his brother is here.- Sup

DEREK: ... I dunno about you but Ive been thinkin a lot about the news.

DAVENFORTH: Nah i havent thought about it even once in fact id forgotten about it entirely

DEREK: Yeah ok. 

DEREK: So whats your plan? I know youve got one.

PENNY: -slides closer from like two seats away- what news?

DAVENFORTH: What do you mean are you really asking me if im a bad enough dude to assassinate the presidents

DAVENFORTH: Because thats not even on the table look at every card and lo and behold it aint there conveniently missing like the last piece of the puzzle

DEREK: ... 

DEREK: -looks at penny- Dual juggalo presidents.

PENNY: ... -snrk- 

PENNY: yall just found out that happened?

DAVENFORTH: Yeah

DEREK: Cant say Ive had much opportunity to keep on top of all the bullshit goin down here.

PENNY: hoo boy well. 

PENNY: welcome to the new United States of Whatever.

RILEY: -she was dead asleep, and suddenly, she wakes up. sleeping on a party bus is great. she stretches a little before noticing that penny is talking to Derek and davenforth, but it's hard to know if it's a step forward or backward. which is why she's conveniently pretending to not pay attention but in reality is intensely eavesdropping-

DAVENFORTH: This is my united states of whatever

PENNY: -she still hasn't quite figured out that Derek is her Boy. she's been avoiding looking at Riley a little too much.- 

PENNY: and then up comes Zafo and Im like yo Zafo whats up hes like nothin and Im like thats cool.

PENNY: ok but really.

PENNY: the whole things a joke and everybody knows it.

PENNY: but not even a good one.

DAVENFORTH: Pretty dangerous joke

DAVENFORTH: Your new buddy back there finds their very existence offensive

PENNY: yeah well Im more scared of what were doing right now than the clowns sitting in the White House.

PENNY: literal clowns.

DAVENFORTH: Those clowns are a lot more dangerous than you think

RILEY: -why does jodie love the clowns so much-

PENNY: Im a lot more dangerous than they think.

PENNY: theyre just human anyway.

DAVENFORTH: Ill let you fight em then

DEREK: Yeah but. Humans appointed by the queen bee bitch herself no doubt. DEREK: Clearly theyre influencin the populous into a compliant lifestyle under her rule.

DAVENFORTH: Anyway i think we should make a pit stop on the way to minnesota

DAVENFORTH: Let condy were coming

PENNY: oh sure. PENNY: Id love to punch a juggalo in the dick.

DAVENFORTH: Well

DAVENFORTH: Thats good to hear

TAKODA: -glances back at them- UM... NOT TO EAVESDROP, BUT 1 TH1NK WE M1GHT HAVE TO PASS THROUGH D.C. ANYWAY... MOST OF THE H1GHWAYS ARE BLOCKED... ER. THERE ARE TOLLS, BUT, 1'VE BEEN AFRA1D TO... SEE WHAT 1T 1S THEY'RE CHARG1NG... TAKODA: BUT WE ARE CLOSE TO THE CAP1TAL... 1 GUESS WE M1GHT AS WELL... STOP THERE... -doesn't seem keen on the idea though-

HIGHBLOOD: to eavesdrop, weren't like it wasn't gonna already get up and goin on, bein in the middle of that route makes shit easier =Dueces from the back=

PENNY: WOOOOOO!!!!

DAVENFORTH: Kill the figureheads and send the heart a message

DAVENFORTH: She can be touched

PENNY: fuck troll booths GO JOHN WILKES BOOTH.

RILEY: -done with eavesdropping apparently- are we assassins now?

MAYOR: -produces a burger King crown and stomps on it on the floor. NO MASTERS. NO KINGS.-

DEREK: Lil dude knows whats up.

PENNY: YEEAAHHH BOIII.

DEREK: -to be fair riley some of us here have always been assassins.-

DAVENFORTH: -Sweats-

RILEY: -WELL I HAVENT-

QIRIN: =she has almost been assassinated several dozen times. does that count as experience?=

RILEY: -aside from assassinating the abstract concepts of family-

PENNY: -YOU DID SUCCEED AT THAT-

QIRIN: =ladies=

PENNY: so whats the plan? how are we doing it?

RILEY: anarchy.

HIGHBLOOD: you'll find the how's always changin sis HIGHBLOOD: best to do it, get it done cause ain't no event can be planned down

DAVENFORTH: Especially not with clowns in the mix

DAVENFORTH: Trust me we got this

PENNY: so were driving the party bus into the White House. got it.

TAKODA: (UHH...)

HIGHBLOOD: hell yeah

DAVENFORTH: Not quite but close

TAKODA: (OH... THAT'S A REL1EF... PROBABLY?)

RILEY: but still with a bang.

TAKODA: ST1LL... 1T WOULD PROBABLY BE ADV1SABLE, 1F WE HAD SOME K1ND OF PLAN, BEFORE WE ROLLED 1NTO THE CAP1TAL... -fidgets nervously-

RILEY: no plan. everyone for themselves. if our plans contradict each other's and we all die, oh well.

HIGHBLOOD: amen sis, everybody's gotta go sometime

RILEY: -oh my god he's being serious-

HIGHBLOOD: :o)

TAKODA: ...

RILEY: that is not actually what i think we should do.

RILEY: just putting that out there.

HIGHBLOOD: =Is he? Who knows= here i was under some mass assumption that the ones all up without alla that gumption and fight experience was gonna leap they asses into the fray wills n nills flung about

DEREK: -snickers. oops.-

RILEY: -unimpressed face at derek-

DEREK: -love u...-

RILEY: -UH HUH-

DEREK: -just winks-

RILEY: -acts like she's pushing her hair out of her face but she is only using her middle finger-

DAVENFORTH: I could probably get in easy enough by myself

DAVENFORTH: Doubt the security is much of anything

HIGHBLOOD: =sNRK, they really aren't much of anything he's sure=

RILEY: don't play the hero. -THIS AINT OVERWATCH AND YOU ARE NOT A BAD GENJI-

DAVENFORTH: Hardly playing hero

RILEY: then who's gonna be your backup?

DEREK: That would be me.

RILEY: then who's going to be YOUR back up?

DAVENFORTH: We got each others backs thats three sixty coverage

DAVENFORTH: We could take molly hes rowdy enough -That's you ghb-

HIGHBLOOD: i was already headed there but i could leave a trail for y'all :oP =eats nachos at=

PENNY: alright well I call dibs on the getaway bus.

RILEY: can we make sure my kid has a dad and an uncle and a...big clown guy by the time we leave D.C.? no stupid reckless shit.

DEREK: Baby please when have I ever been reckless?

PENNY: -side eyes-.........

PENNY: kid?

HIGHBLOOD: =eats these nachos and watches this=

RILEY: all the fucking time. -glances at penny- yeah. kid.

DEREK: --

DAVENFORTH: Pretty sure lif would kill me if i died

PENNY: -she's real quiet now, staring at the floor of the bus.-

RILEY: hilarious. -she notices penny's demeanor change and isn't quite sure why, but figuring out her sister now isn't as easy it was when sadness went away with hugs and singing made her happy-

PENNY: -She's working her jaw and tapping her foot as the seconds and the minutes go by, and then before long she hops up and rushes to the little bus bathroom, clanging the door shut behind her.-

DEREK: -watches her storm off- ... -looks back at riley-

RILEY: -also watches- well, shit.

DAVENFORTH: Damn

ROXANNE: -With the sound of the bus bathroom door shutting she starts to wake up from her nap in the back of the bus. Why people gotta be noisy.-

LIFERA: -probably snuggled up to Roxanne too. It's a cuddle nap party in the back of the bus.-

ROXANNE: -Sits up some more only to have the donuts GHB apparently stacked on her head while she was out topple onto her lap.- ........... -blinks at them.-

ROXANNE: -Also heck, fish queen is adorable, shes taking care not to wake her as she sits up and quietly stretches.-

HIGHBLOOD: =In which case Lifera has donuts on her horns=

ROXANNE: -That... is amusing.- ROXANNE: -Okay time to stretch her legs, she carefully gets up from the back of the bus snuggle pile and moves herself forward towards the rest of the awake people.- ROXANNE: -Sits and dusts donut crumbs off herself.- So. Miss anything interestin'?

DEREK: Only that were gonna storm the white house and assassinate the presidents.

ROXANNE: ....Are we bein' serious or not in saying that?

RILEY: -her mind's a little elsewhere and she keeps having to focus on not looking at the bathroom door.-

ROXANNE: -Maybe Riley needs a nap. Naps are pretty relaxing. Just look how calm Roxanne is right now.-

RILEY: -NOBODY ASKED YOU ROXANNE!!!!!!-

DEREK: I cant believe yall are accusing me left and right of taking such serious subjects lightly. Unbelievable.

ROXANNE: Thats not technically an answer.

ROXANNE: Just want to be clear on whatever plan people are makin' up when im snoozing.

RILEY: baseless accusations. -she's gonna move next to Derek because too many feelings about family right now.-

ROXANNE: -Props her feet up on the empty seat next to her.-

DEREK: -wraps an arm around riley. relax, babe.- For real though thats the plan. DEREK: Were right on the Capitals doorstep. In the middle of a war. The Condesce thinks she can do whatever the fuck she wants with any idiot working under her. DEREK: Might as well send her a message.

RILEY: -leans against him.- they wanna fuck shit up.

ROXANNE: -Mmmmm, she certainly feels conflict over this idea. On one hand, earth is her home and damn right shes all for getting rid of this clown presidency bullshit. However, her biggest priority is to find and get back to her loved ones asap...- 

ROXANNE: I get the sentiment.

ROXANNE: You make it sure sound easy though.

DAVENFORTH: Its just juggalos how hard could it be

ROXANNE:

President

juggalos. Even Trump had protection.

DEREK: Yeah but Derek and Davenforth Strider werent alive back then. -this cocky motherfucker-

ROXANNE: -He is the most cocky.- ROXANNE: Mmmhm.

DEREK: -more winking-

ROXANNE: -Manboy please.-

JODIE: -burps-

ROXANNE: -Side eyes Jodie at the burp.-

JODIE: scuzie.

HIGHBLOOD: blame it on the bubbly sis =he's probably shared faygo with her=

JODIE: i thought y'all would be more anxious to reunite with yer kid.

ROXANNE: I sure am.

ROXANNE: No offense to porrim but my skin has been crawlin' knowin russet is on the ship without at least one of us.

QIRIN: =has she been pacing? yup=

JODIE: sorry...kids.

DAVENFORTH: -Sighs-

RILEY: we are all very far apart i think so... i'm not sure this detour will take away much time at all.

JODIE: yeah. 'caus eoverthrowin the government is really just a pit stop.

ROXANNE: It's goin' to take more time them going straight there.

ROXANNE: Also there is the whole. 

ROXANNE: I dunno' chance of dying?

DAVENFORTH: Jinjin is in good hands besides what were doin is gonna help make a better place for them to grow up

JODIE: do you really think everythin is gonna work out exactly as you plan it to. -just staring flatly-

DEREK: Yep.

ROXANNE: -She's with you Jodie.-

JODIE: i mean you're the ninja's not me.

RILEY: ain't dave in alaska? and dirk is in the black hole of texas.

JODIE: 'sides it hought you all were apart of a crew but i don't see you askin permission.

DAVENFORTH: Im real bad at doing that

ROXANNE: Wow the confidence is unreal. -She's a little salty that Derek isn't more anxious to get back to his kids.-

DAVENFORTH: Ask my nephew

JODIE: sounds like arrogant, poorly planned bs.

JODIE: this is just a testosterone-fest.

JODIE: -snorts-

DAVENFORTH: No this is about sending a fucking message

JODIE: don't try to make it seem all noble. at lesat be honest. haha.

DEREK: -naturally he's anxious to see them, but he's with his brother here...-

RILEY: -watches jodie-

ROXANNE: -Stand up to your brother-

DEREK: -why would he stand up to him when he agrees with him??-

HIGHBLOOD: =Plays tense, appropriate music for the bickering humans. Tramatic muffled trumpet softly in the bg=

DAVENFORTH: This is about telling her that were not standing for this bullshit she knows were coming but shes gonna know were coming with a goddamn vengeance im not gonna let my daughter grow up in the grips of a galaxy that despises her fuckin existence and im damn sure not gonna let her live with the same bullshit ive gone through

JODIE: -sad trombone would be more fitting in her opinion-

DAVENFORTH: If youve got a problem youre welcome to walk

JODIE: i'm just sayin, you can't go around claiming this is the best plan for everyone. it's just the best plan for yer ego.

JODIE: i ain't going anywhere.

JODIE: i don't have any special powers. and i ain't got no leg to stand on when it comes to decision making. i'm barely a crew member.

ROXANNE: Im siding with Jodie on this. ROXANNE: Im really all for taking the ax to this new government, but we've got other issues to deal with first.

ROXANNE: We can meet up with everyone else and regroup an attack later.

DAVENFORTH: You can go too i dont give a shit

ROXANNE: Right now we are spread thin, with no back up, no intell. And like hell you two are doin' it on your own.

JODIE: -just snort laughs.-

JODIE: well, there wasn't no harm in trying. -JUST CHINHANDING.-

DAVENFORTH: Im not askin for backup and im not asking you to be alright with it ill go it alone if i goddamn have to but im not just gonna let this woman have her way with earth like she has every other planet

DAVENFORTH: Shes fucking playing us

DAVENFORTH: Weve lost too much we hold dear

DAVENFORTH: Its her fucking turn

ROXANNE: -Stares straight at Derek like "Can you believe this??"-

JODIE: -shrugalugs at riley and then just sprawls over the bus seat again.-

DEREK: -sorry ro...- We gotta pass through DC regardless so. 

DEREK: Maybe yall dont wanna go with us but aint nothin gonna stop me and him from trying.

QIRIN: | )

ROXANNE: -STARES HARDER.-

DAVENFORTH: Just drop us off fuck it

ROXANNE: Derek. You got one infant girl on a ship hundreds of miles away. ROXANNE: And another unborn baby sittin' right next to you.

ROXANNE: ...Are you actually bein' serious right now???

ROXANNE: You can be as confident as you want but you know going through with that plan means you might Die right?

DAVENFORTH: Third times the charm -Scoffs-

JODIE: if you can't convince em not to do it, you should try to minimize the damage.

QIRIN: >_> =what did u say=

DAVENFORTH: -YOU HEARD HIM-

RILEY: -she doesn't know exactly what to say here. she considers herself stuck either way. There's no winner here. Some of the most stubborn people she knows are in this bus. she sighs, rubbing her own neck-

DEREK: -stfu dave u ain't dying.-

JODIE: -looking at Roxanne- you're a smart lady arentcha. they'd have a better chance of survivin if you helped.

QIRIN: Is the term not "three strikes, you are out"?

ROXANNE: -Side eyes Jodie even more.- Of course im helpin' if he goes through with this stupid plan.

JODIE: cool beans.

DEREK: -scoffs a little. incredible...- 

DEREK: Well yeah Im goin through with it.

ROXANNE: Maybe hopefully he'll realize how crazy this is if both of Russet's parents are at risk--

ROXANNE: -YOU ARE REALLY TESTING HER DEREK.-

RILEY: -while they're talking, she moves Derek's arm off of her and walks off where she sits in the back-

ROXANNE: -Her eyes follow Riley, shes pretty miffed she didn't say anything in this argument.-

JODIE: -she's also judging riley for this tbh-

JODIE: -but she's already accepted her fate. she's doing all she can to help, at least for jamie's sake.-

DAVENFORTH: -He's quiet. Thinking about his two daughters. How condy's reign would mean their literal deaths.-

QIRIN: =She's thinking utter subjugation and ruin of her people=

QIRIN: =though both are not pretty thoughts=

RILEY: -she thinking about history repeating itself and how truly fucked they'll all be this time-

DAVENFORTH: -But he's also thinking about Beforus, Europa, the people here on Earth. How much would it mean to end the figureheads of their subjugation. Would it spur them on to fight? Would Condy's grasp on Earth slip even a little bit?-

JODIE: -She's thinking about how aginst this James would be.-

JODIE: -Sorry charlie!-

JODIE: -If somebody stronger was here in her eplace.-

RILEY: -she wasn't thinking about the consequences much before. but where the hell is she going to have to wait around while all this happens?-

DAVENFORTH: I think everyone who doesnt want in should continue to minnesota

RILEY: -from the back, a little irritated- and wait?

JODIE: no. i'm gonna help. -SPITEFUL-

JODIE: -maybe you get to do this, but she's not going to let you HAVE this-

DAVENFORTH: Thats your choice

DAVENFORTH: You just gonna wait in dc riley

JODIE: -She's liking Davenforth less and less all the time. Stupid jerk.-

RILEY: i don't fucking know. i sure as hell ain't going out of state away from you three while you try to pull this off.

DAVENFORTH: -It's fine he's used to it-

RILEY: i don't want to leave anybody behind.

DAVENFORTH: I respect that

DAVENFORTH: I dont want yall in danger for somethin you didnt sign up for i aint forcin that on anyone but im doin this

ROXANNE: Do you honestly think you would be doing it alone. Not everyone on this bus is okay with letting some of us go on a possible suicide mission.

DAVENFORTH: You should know me by now ro

JODIE: -Snorts.- so charitable.

RILEY: look, if i didn't have a tiny person inside of me, then i'd jump in and help.

ROXANNE: Guess I thought I did. -She shrugs.- 

ROXANNE: Im doin' it with you two, but im not happy 'bout it. Actually Im pretty pissed. 

ROXANNE: We do live through this I'm kicking your asses myself after we get back to the ship.

QIRIN: =clears her throat after a very long time of being quiet= I would like to hear more of this plan of yours if you or...we are to go through with this.

DAVENFORTH: Everyones kicking my ass after this one probably

TAKODA: -all these bad vibes... he's just going to go back to driving since they uh... have a plan now, he guesses. he's mostly uneasy because he knows, as a part of the resistance, they should take an opportunity as it's presented to them...-

RILEY: -rubbing her forehead-

DEREK: -his guilt isn't obvious, but it's definitely there. he doesn't want to endanger anybody here, and it ain't as if he wants to orphan any of his kids, but... sometimes you gotta follow your gut. he's just keeping quiet for now.-

RILEY: -she puts her hood of the jacket she's wearing up and turns so that she's watching everything pass by, damn hormones and emotions making her eyes all watery-

JODIE: -drinks-

RILEY: -IF ONLY SHE COULD-

[guys-chill]

My Demons are PTA Moms

Hey so as you know, I love PTA mom jokes and like making names for my friends ect. Well sometimes, when shit hits the fan and there are lots of negative thoughts, so I address each thought as if it were some stuck up lady from the PTA. Here’s my “convo” that happened last night ( I was talking to my friend and basically texted her my thoughts) bc I think it’s funny. If you wanna skip the buildup and go straight to moms, skip the first bit and start where I say YOOT. Theres alot.. yall dont gotta read i know that its alot alot

TW for mentions of rape

Set the scene: My mind is wandering, open to passing thoughts

Me: I wonder why sometimes your brain thinks about nothing. Like, there are so many things to think about, yet I stare at the ceiling thinking about nothing just kind of floating in empty mind space

Me: Now im thinking about [ex bf.] and how i want to work through my [ex bf.] memories with you and [friend’s boyfriend who is also my friend] and how that’s unfair bc its like, yall dont exist to listen to my problems and im thinking i need to face them and get through that wall of pain. Like they’re motly breaking up memories atm. Im trying to avoid them because its hard

Friend: He and I are your friends and part of our job as friends is to listen

Me: :^)

Me: Ye but like no i feel so selfish when we are about me

Friend: But you shouldn’t

Me: You know that meme that’s like “I feel uncomfortable when we are about me”. Mood

Friend: No I don’t

Me: Rip. Yeet bc i wanna face them but i know it’s gonna have me breaking down and I want a hug and like yall aren’t responsible for me or like i j feel bad

Friend: It’s ok dude we’re here for you

Me: But i know i gotta face them but im putting it off rn bc i don’t wanna fall asleep breaking down but why cant i just do it like UGGGH. Like with opening up my feelings door I’ve opened up remembering that i blocked kinda or avoided ahhh lol my mind is riptastic and sad rn but my heart is only mildly and i dont wanna be sadddsdddddd and i avoid my shit. [Her bf] is right that its hard to face your shit. And I feel dumb for not. And its like just let the suffering commense, you’ll be fine later

Friend: I’m sorry

Me: Why am i so FUCKING needy. Lol sorry im like this

Friend: You’re not needy my dude!

Me: My brain is like !OOh idea! Lets want someone to love you and hug you and all this shit to be really extra even though it doesn’t even matter that much bc who gives a fuck yo people have they’re own lives but you know I think it sounds like a GREat way to make things difficult haha fuck u

Me: Lol i said i wasn’t gonna get into this but look at me goooooooooo. YEET

Friend: Oh boy you’re ok

Me: Yo its fine god im im a messsss yoot AAHH YOOT THATS SO FUNNY

Friend (Prolly like oh boyyy at this point): You’re gonna be ok I’m sorry

Me: Wanna hear my inner dialouge lol YOU KNOW WHAT IM GOOD AT MEMES YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT

Me: Ye thank you I appreciate that

Friend: If you want to share

Me: I appreciate you listening to me

Friend: Any time

Me: Why is my mind just like saying rando shit its like Haha you fucking psycho kill yourself, and its like no Pam, that’s not even what were talking about rn. Like who invited you. Yeah I know no one invited me to my own party haha funny jan. Why am I a mess. But HeY at least we’ve gotten distracted

Friend: Oh boy I’m sorry

Me: “Lol im gonna kill you” thanks maureen

Friend: Why all the suicidal thoughts

Me: Im thinking of that vine of this kid awkward dancing to like trap music and his mom walks in and you can hear her mouthing like turn it down wtf. I dont even know I dont even wanna die my mind is so unoriginal. Good to know Jan, youre worthless too

Me: Like im doing that thing where i make everything a joke to not have it hit as hard

Friend: Im sorry. You’ll be ok

Me: TW rape “Lol no he didn’t rape me in the butt you insensitive bitch (me @ Clarissa)” Haha im gonna fucking kill myself. That one was a bit more real. I suppose both but like the kill yourself bit

Friend: Oh boy

Me: I wanna die im a mess. Tw again Youre so ugly why the fuck would he even wanna rape you haha dumb bitch got raped you dummy couldn’t even get him off lol you got him off tho...SHUT UP. lol no Way hunny this is too fun you vulnerable cunt haha fucking ill whip out any insult that has to do with sexually explicit shit come at me slut

Me: Haha im sorry

Friend: Oh boy, don’t be sorry. You’re ok. What he did was on him, it had nothing to do with you it wasn’t your fault

Me: Why they gotta say rape so much like i get it gerryanna; you’re shitty at sales pitching sell me something i dont know. God i love these moods (sarcastically)

Friend: Oh boy

Me: Haha you dumb bitch like they’re not even original. Im calling the superintendent of my mind and having them all taken off the PTA board of trustees. Fuck you Helen. Not you though [Friend] your name susan helen does not apply during breakdowns

Friend: Oh boy. Is there anything i can do

Me: Im just laying here with a pained smile on my face its not even a breakdown its a roast sesh. Nah not atm besides listen and hear the dumb shit they say

Friend: Oh boy, does it help to get it out like would writing help

Me: Yeah. God you cant even type right. Yeah you’re a secretary Jan sorry I dont have a crumbling marrage and an English degree like you. Oooooh im throwing sick burns. Im not even funny im just sad. I hope you’re laughing. Genuinely I hope its a bit funny because im a piece of trash. Ok yo you didn’t need to say that last part margaree.

Friend: Omfg

Me: God hell yeah you can take me out on trash day fucking Mmm yeah you bet id like that feeling of powerlessness and suffocation of my voice please, expand uponthis trash bag fantasy joann. Ill sit on the curb and cry myself to death you right. Fuck you got me lol I guess ill just give up now. Fool im not done yet get PUNKED Pamela. Im still here to shit on your bad insults. I hate myself, yeah i hate you too Mary Sue. Go fuck yourself; I think i might give it a shot from what i’ve heard its best in the shower and i was gonna take one tomorrow...

Friend: Oh boyyyyyy

Me: Lol yall are dumb; When they try to make their voices sound like mine but you can tell the yall is just you and the’re throwing shit at you but you see it. Im great fuck you pam

Friend: Oh gee

Me: This is good, like genuinely its like a throwdown and they’re bloody on the floor (the pta council). Fuck em, yeah fuck you too janice. “I hadta do it to em”- me at my future kid asking why i did this. Yeah i beat up Suzanne but she was a bitch anyway. Ok now stop trying to get all on my side pauleenI know you’re with them. Go with the rest of em. I bought you a luxury cruise well actually yall did bc yall are selfish and feed off sadness go drink some martinis and come back but you bet ill be fucking waiting for you, yeah ik were not done donna, but ill still be there and... “I love you”- I love you too higher sweetie who sounds like [my friend’s spirit guide] no now its my higher self but also [her]? Yeet ok bye yall

Friend: Oh boy

Me: Fuck um, Patricia decided to stay behind and keep me company. Lol im a mess. How are you things have relatively chilled. And now im being told “I love you” from someone i think me a higher power that believes in me

Friend: Eh im alright. How are you

Me: Im better. Did you enjoy that little skit my ego wants to know so it can make a production and Pam can bring her friends back and then my higher self is saying just say you love me and you’re here, “and i love you”- higher bee thank you I love you too. Idek, yes I know i’m a mess pam. I know

Friend: “Higher bee” oh could you imagine if god was just a fluffy bumble bee wanting us to love ourselves. I’m sorry you’re going through this

Me: But im a mess of glitter, spilled but pretty and not going away yeah ok no pretty is not my only worthy reason for existing but thanks. Im also friendly. Awwww thatd be so sweet. Thatd BEE so sweet. She’s beautiful

Friend: Ba dum tss

Me: Its ok i find it mildly funny. “I cant drown my demons, they’re in a pta meeting atm and dont have their pool passes handy”

Friend: Lol

Me: Haha im livingg. I love you. Thank you for listening

Friend: I love you too and any time

Me: “I love you so much” thank you giant sky bee, God thank you giant sky bee godbless. Bless yourself. How are you. Im feeling loved. I faced part of the wall yoot lol

Friend: I’m glad you’re feeling loved I’m ok

Me: Like i faced something, im here and it matters. I love you. Im glad you’re ok. What have you been doing how long was that. 12:46 to 1:20. 35-40 min. Average breakdown cycle. Nice good to know. See, its all chill after 40 min

----

And thats that my guys uhh yeah i keep track of how long i break down for and it really is only about 45 minutes until your body wears itself out. I love you all 

[problematicc-favs]

memey au jared kleinman x reader; headcannons

THESE HEADCANNONS ARE BASED ON THE MEME SOULMATE AU, WHICH IS AN AU WHERE YOUR SOULMATES FAV MEME IS TATTOOD ON YOU FOREARM,,, BUT HERES THE C A T C H JARED AND READER ARE BOTH EXTREMY MEMeY PEOPLE SO THEY HAVE MULTIPLE MEMES ON THEIR ARMS K COOL

Written @ Writers Wednesday, special thanks to;

Flower Anon

cryptid

@i-just-love-writing-crap

@faist-me-bitch 

@flowreatr

cronch

@arsonboirich

@radicallyred

@spicy-nug-boi

OKAY SO

-Everyone is born with their soulmates favorite meme on their forearm

-Its always like a very specific meme so like if your soulmate saw it they would be like ‘oh shit thats me’

-You, however, were born with a shit ton of memes

-Like, all of them

-Ones from like the MEDIEVAL times of memes yo and also brand new ones and its kind of sick??

-sick as in cool or sick as in gross only you can decide

-you frequently wake up with a new meme on your arm whenever a new one becomes popular

 -sometimes you have to go on knowyourmeme.com to figure out what the fuck is on your body

-every day you look at your arm and cupcakke lyrics are there 

-its hell

-”ms. (Y/N) why is there the words ‘hump me fuck-’”

 “doN’T WORRY ABOUT IT”

-You probably got teased as a child tbh because of it

-But like its fine bc you also really enjoyed a shit ton of memes

- sometimes you gotta wear long sleeves to school/work because of inappropriate memes

-you’re the only person you’ve ever met with like,, more than one meme so you can’t tell if you’re special or if you’ve been cursed

-it’s totally a curse

- like 100/10 total curse and you weren't sure if you liked it or not

-One day you like went to the coffee shop or some shit and saw someone else with a shit ton of memes on their arm and you're like 

‘should I say something? fuck,’ 

-And like just give in and go introduce yourself

-Both of you are hella stupid and don't realize you're each others soulmate, you just think you both have soulmates who love memes

-he says his name is Jared and he like buys you coffee or some shit

-you guys probably figured out you were soulmates after like a couple times of hanging out after really taking a hard look at each other's memes in like a dick measuring “my soulmates memes are better than yours” thing

-and then something catches your eyes

-you’re like

‘wait that looks like that meme I made in my freshman year’

-Oh.

-OHHH.

-you saw the emoji movie as your first ‘official’ date don't @ me

-he’s so stupidly proud that he has so many favorite memes

-like seriously

-”god damn i have good taste. You’re lucky, you could’ve been stuck with the ‘i has cheeseburger cat’”

-Robbie Rotten was on your arm for a whole year

-im so glad he beat cancer so much respect dude

- You guys probably fight over what meme is the best

-people have probably asked if you guys are okay tbh

-the answer is no

- like it's love at first meme with him once you realize you’re soulmates, no joke

- you two immediately could go on and on about all the memey shit you can do later on

-after sex Jared definitely says ”you know I had to do it to em" and dabs

- you push him off the bed at some point after sex 

“goddammit Jared ONE time I ask for no memes after sex”

-hearing the words “gotta go fast” during sex

-when he comes he says ‘here comes dat boi’

-or “GOTTA BLAST”

-you finishing fucking and he says in the owen wilson voice “waow”

-woah boys thats an inside joke

-he sings dat boi so much it’s a sin

- hardcore sinning. every damn day

-he’s probably sung it in sleep before let's be honest

- and you've still pushed him out of bed

-wanna know what else he's sung in his sleep ?

- deepthroat

-its your fav song though so its fine its chill

-actually, your favourite song fluctuates from deepthroat to my neck my back

-that topic has been the subject of many heated debates

-When you are having a bad day he will sing it like ‘my neck, my back, my anxiety attack’ and it makes you laugh

-once when you were having an intense panic attack and he found you he started to try and comfort you and you gasped out ‘zoinks this situation is getting out of hand we better call the scooby crew’

-you think that might be when he really fell for you

-at some point your forearm gets so crowded that the memes start to spread up to your bicep and then your shoulder

-at some point you probably find a meme like on ya titty area and Jared is like super into it somehow

-jared has a meme kink

- ‘talk memey to me bb’

-anytime you walk in the room he goes, “o shit my honey waddup my baby here  come dat ragtime gaaaal” with the stupidest shit eating grin

-you love it tho

-it makes you smile every time

- ’call me pepe in bed it turns me on’

- ’please off yourself’

- ’please get me off’

- ‘thats what i loveeee…. Nestle CRONCH’

-he definitely owns a fedora

-he tips it at you regularly

- ‘m’lady’

-he’s only worn it into public once (for a dare)

-mothafuckin bathbombs

-jared definitely fucked a bath bomb

-kInKY

-a note from mom: HOW THE F U C K DO YOU FUCK A BATH BOMB

-hE ONce made you wear a blindfold with emojis printed on it because he’s like that into the emoji movie

-once for your birthday he took pictures of you two together and made them into a mlg parody

-he’s also unironically played minecraft

-i love that this has turned into “jared is a meme”

-You go to a doctor and it turns out having this many memes can actually negatively effect your actions and sanity so you literally have a condition because of this dorks love of memes and he has it too

-at that point everything  is covered in memes but your face and hands

- sometimes you question if it's worth the memes

-(that's what you say but on the inside you love your memey boyfriend way more than the memes themselves)

-but you love him no matter how much he gots on your nerves and you could never live without him

- by the time yall are 80 you're  still memey as hell

-s{hr}ex is love s{hr}ex is life

-jared has an emoji kink

-*slides up next to you at lunch* ya like jazz

-jared has definitely jerked off to barry bee benson from the bee movie

-he calls sex funkytown

-i.e; let's take a trip to funkytown ;) xD

-he calls pepe daddy

-Likes to say he is “winning”

-He once started a sexting sesh with sending that fucking Rawr xD post

-you know the fucking one

-once you came into his house without knocking and he yelled  “DONKEY!!1!1!! GET OUTTA MY SWAMP!!11!1111!!!!”

-when you're mad you blast it's hip to fuck BEES throughout the entire house with Bluetooth speakers

-he actually likes jake from state farm

-compares evan to jake from state farm bc khakis

-if you guys ever have kids he will genuinely want to name them fergus and felicia after shrek’s kids

-literally you have a fight about how it’s not okay

-and he wants your first born kid to be born on 9/11

-names your daughter felicia just so he can say “bye felicia”

-catches kids having sex at home?

SEX? IN MY HOUSE? ITS MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK

-does not eat vegetals

-zoinks scoobs

-IT FROM JApAN

-crossiant

-THE GRIM REAPER DOESNT HAVE FEET AND HES UPSET ABOUT IT OK???????????????

-drinks water out of a bleach container to freak you out

-he only wears boots too big for he got dam feet

bonus-theres a snake in his boot

-basically, in fuckin summary, jared kleinman memes to the xtremes -and you love eachother -you think,, most of the time

[mirrorblogreview-blog]

Researchers Have Found That Plants Know They Are Being Eaten. They know exactly what's going on.

Compa Azcatl Martínez Be vegan dont means that you are a perfect person, means that you try your best for life in earth, means that you try to be better. The problem its you dont try

.LikeShow more reactions · Reply · 10 · 7 hrs · EditedManage1 ReplyMehdi 

Areski I had this Theory on my mind when I was a kid .some plants use animals so they can reproduce I'm not talking about bees at other insects I'm talking about mammals when the animal eat the beans the beans do not digest in their stomach they survive the digestion when the animal poops the beans are covered with fecalmatter which represents to the bean a natural source of minerals the bean will start then to grow then will be a tree

. 😉Like · Reply · 48 minsManageLorra Sykes That is so stupid. Plants are made for us to eat. Maybe the scientists are reading the signals incorrectly. Maybe the know of a plant is like the knowing of a computer. But there is no way we have to stop eating plants and animals just because scientists say so

.Like · Reply · 1 · 1 hrManageRistan Jones Let's eat nothing and just die Emily ShapiroLike · Reply · 20 · 8 hrs 

· EditedManage5 Replies · 7 hrsBrandon Waugh It's the god damn democrats they bribed the plants to have feelings ooooooh the humanity!!!! lol what's next weeks lies going to beLike · Reply · 1 ·

  6 hrsManageJing De Leon Awww.... is this being promoted by "nothingetarians" ? You know --those people who don't eat meat or vegetables.Like · Reply · 12 · 8 hrsManageChad Matthew Hufman Good now I know both plants and animals are aware of my power to destroy them and the glorious strength their dead decaying corpses give my body >:)Like · Reply · 8 · 8 hrsManageJohn Clary Vegicide, plant have feelings too!!! And Soylent Green is people!!!Like · Reply · 5 · 8 hrsManageKabilan Shiva Sudhakar Anna... check this out...plants um paavam😂😂😂Like · Reply · 1 

· 8 hrsManage1 ReplyEnrikos Galanopoulos It's a reaction....not a feeling that a plant has, unlike animals who have feelings. Not rocket science.Like · Reply · 1 · 2 hrsManageKatharina Kostka I knew it, but what should we do? Only eat cooked plants? Not an Option....Like · Reply · 

3 · 9 hrsManageTitus Acosta So for meat eaters to be on the same level as vegans we'd have to eat the animals alive?!.

..Like · Reply · 2 · 7 hrsManageLevi Joseph Chenail Accept that Dharma (The idea all life has value therefore don't harm it) is naiive and unrealistic to a evolving civilization

Like · Reply · 2 · 8 hrsManageShabbaz K Abdullah Its not about stop eating them,but showing respect as we eat them.😯😯Like · Reply · 1 · 7 hrsManageMarco Aguila Vegetables actually enjoy being eaten. It's like a sadistic streak

.Like · Reply · 1 · 6 hrsManageArina Montag exactly what they were made for and have you noticed that the more you pick fruit off a tree, the more that tree produces.Like · Reply · 24 minsManageRob Shirhall Does a chair know it's being sit on too? Where does all this craziness stopLike · Reply · 2 hrsManageBranden Aguirre For every vegan out there. Yall are monsters!!!Like · Reply · 1 min · EditedManageClaire Burrows Ha ha Georgia they know you're eating them! Monica you should know this too.Like · Reply · 1 · 8 hrsManageMubashir Ali In my weird opinion they are more intelligent than humans but they cant move thats why they cant invent technologies.Like · Reply · 5 hrsManageAndrrea Hej Let's just eat the animals.. At least they don't know they're being eaten when they are deadLike · Reply · 6 hrsManageAlex B Marra Marsha Shapiro-Marra guess you should stop eating all together?Like · Reply · 37 minsManageTim OT Allan Knew this before you can sence it somehow when your cutting the treeLike · Reply · 17 minsManage1 ReplyJithin Abraham Sugandha Mehta, Mayatri Gaur, Vartika Tripathi.. You guys are eating them while they are alive..😱😪 tell them Advitya Chopra Abhinav KhannaLike · Reply · 3 · 7 hrs · EditedManage13 Replies · 6 hrsAditya Mankani Stouvant Pittie for all you peeta activistsLike · Reply · 5 · 9 hrsManage5 Replies · 4 hrsRon Nye Celery screams at midnight.Like · Reply · 2 · 8 hrsManageGlen Concepcion Redoblado Its really true, they aware they part of the living thingsLike · Reply · 2 · 9 hrsManageAndrew Carling True, but it's not the same as experiencing pain.Like · Reply · 9 hrsManageDebbie Hartman Omg Brandi Lynn we have to stop eating any and all 🌱Like · Reply · 8 hrsManageJudy Leslie Drowns Really 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄Like · Reply · 2 · 9 hrsManageShruti Ray Anusha Hola put it in your rabbit foodLike · Reply · 9 hrsManageShane LaReau I always knew vegans were monsters.Like · Reply · 1 · 7 hrsManageTaha Sultan OH SHIT SOMEONE CALL PETA 😂😂😂 JKLike · Reply · 1 · 7 hrsManageIlko Birov Holy cow!Like · Reply · 1 · 7 hrsManageMitch Gordon You would know tooLike · Reply · 1 · 9 hrsManagePhilip James Jarosz That's why Eve got Adam to eat an apple.Like · Reply · 7 hrsManageDwayne Thomas Claire poor babiesLike · Reply · 2 · 5 hrsManageAura De Silva Let's chew some plastics from now on... XDXD...Like · Reply · 6 hrsManageDow Jiggah that why i eat who'm ever the fuck i like ;)Like · Reply · 6 hrsManageNakisha Edwards If it breathes it feels but . I'm still going to eat em .Like · Reply · 8 hrsManageVlad Patryshev Animals don't.Like · Reply · 7 hrsManageJose Longoria Jr. Plant is murder!Like · Reply · 3 hrsManageBecca Strong John DowningLike · Reply · 4 hrsManageBijou Bakson I wander what vegetarians got to say about this!Like · Reply · 7 hrsManageAngel Mira Of course they're a lifeLike · Reply · 7 hrsManageCarmen Corrada They "know"??? Really?Like · Reply · 59 minsManage3 Replies · 50 minsTanner Oman So do we when we get eaten alive. Fuck em.Like · Reply · 1 · 6 hrsManageRandy Dorn Explain this vegetarians plant lives matterLike · Reply · 1 hrManageEvan Fulgor Pearce This is ancient news... fmlLike · Reply · 7 hrsManageTân Lê My Lâm for your veggie friend :))Like · Reply · 9 hrsManageWilliam Topping Fuck offLike · Reply · 5 hrsManageMitch Gordon No shit.

[failinginvestigativejournalist]

Dont freak out, itss just writing

i grew up fast (so fast) (too quick nigga) (wish i went through when i was just a bit bigger) can you tell me who the parent is uh ya the first time i drove a whip i was a fuckin kid, (96 suburban nigga) (yo yo, did you tell em why) oh ya shit my fault my mom was bleeding from her chin i dont know what from or what about, scared to death i took that drive to the ER (Medical SHIIIT) (mom got too drunk again and feel out) (wheres dad? in his room his doors locked, figures i dont expect, as i try to knock (no answer nigga) i dont blame em he removes himself from the sitiation so he dont hit her) ya i fucking grew quick, ya i fucking tryed some shit, the first time i dropped out and took some shroomies i was age 6 plus 6, thats 12 for the illiterates, actually aas a matter a fact it was fuckin pleasant as fuck as i drew back the droe and took another hit. now that i think that was the day, older brother came and gave me cig i obliged no way to say nay, i was still trippin and it was a sensational feelin, it left me stumblin and dizzy a head rush like no other i was hooked for live to the day and i dont blame him, i dont think he knew what he had started, adding to the compilation of the monsxter inside that took refuge and started, poison in his mind, the drugs altered his brain activity but he was buckled up and commited to the ride.Shit i just said in third person let me apologize to yall sometimes the ideas flow together like two fortune five mergin, these feels of hate be strong ya im hurtin, i cant blame no one, i cant choose the family i was birthed in, started sniffin ups felt my blood surgin, gotta big head but my nemisis, the evil inside myself was bigger aboutt the size of a white sturgeon, like some northern ish that canadain shit like british columbia or somethin idk, alls i can say is that BC bud out that bitch is my fav to blow, the sour D, diesel to be exact for you niggas who waana try to nit pick or correct my personal facts, let me just speak at you,  all the hatin niggas tryin bring me down, bad news, i do drugs like steve from fuckin blues clues, but my rents always on time when that xshits due, any ways i side tracked speaking of tracks just lined some shit up did with speed did with need i did it with tact, im dextrous and shit i always have a unique train of thought oh shit trains again trains derailed at this point hhaaha i crack myself up sometimes with the wit in my words leh-let you in on the pun so you can join in my fun, about the lines the lines are no more you didn arrive in time i promise these raps have rhythm they have rhyme i aint spittin to waste your time, i aint spittin to catch a dime, bag or bitch, it really dont matter, niether last long but they are still my niche, come here bitch come hit this shit, this time dont have a fit, mind over matter just stick yuh nose in these rails sit down for a bit, drink some wata, go to your happy place we are gettin to old for me to have tote on yuh just from hitten lines but i put up wit it, you got that 50 thou boat on yuh, not to mention your ride, that shit is so sweet i cant decidddee which id rather seed, as in inseminate with my seaman as i play the part as a seaman workin for seimans on a marine voyage i aint like you im a higher being, i dont know whatchu talkin whatch your eyes be seein i am a divine heathan i really cant fucking believe a niggas still breathin im a florida boy born and raised, i sit the fuck back drink my beer in the shade, high as i usually am a rinny tin tin rinscotts tale \down the rintin like a shark fin poatched by commercial fisherman thrown in a bin, no regard for life the human race is so greedy, people just aint my type, say what you want i know me best and i know im right. my creative talents on the other hand be outta sight, im my own worst enemy to cross the bridge pay the fee, trollin in the hood for that g, withdrawin, shakin i drop to my knee look up to the sky ask god if he sees. hear the sound of humming, huh must be bees, or im trippin out maybe its a flash back i dont remmember. whats th-this street, tremblin think my heat skipped a bit, or a couple shakinso bad my knes begin to buckle, anxiety can be dibilatated held me back from so much in life thers no debating. unfamiliar route. made it to this bar ordered a stout got to thinking, you may ask what about, this is why i like solitude to be on my own to answer to noone to depend on myself and live it to the fullest while im yung, my mind will reel, replaying all i know every single memory, that im capable of bringing back, i compare my brain to a file cabinet, i keep it hidden like in an office towards the back. A photographic memory is a gift and a curse, ill tell you whatat, if you dont keep it in check you will end up in a herse, sure you can remember the happy shit the good things in your life but you cant fucking forget the huge hits the fucking bad bitch the one who broke your heart? dounno how to forget you but i think i know where to start, i thought it was drugs, i numbed my body with chemicals little did i know with every shot the metaphorical shovel scooped out some more dirt from the inconcievable whole i fuckin dug. my life has been weird kinda like an opriental from a flee market an awkward rug, with no real spot in the house, was always the black sheep in the fam i tryed to tip toe as quiet as a mouse, some tom and jerry shit my mistakes and regrets cbhasing me around like tom the cat from that shit, I hide in my hidey whole, disconeected from any social environmeent i often found myself cryin, but self loathin is kinda like being a a gay with some dicks hes blowin, givin a ski job pitty is the lube hatred is the tube the vessel to carry out a deed the fags not sure about, hes experimentin comparable to some situations in my life cept wont catch me with two dudes in a shower, that was just a metaphor. you feel me? im sure the haters will hop all over that verse but just fuckinh hear me. I got my shades on and these bitches special, haters they block, they keep you no fun, sticklers out of sight out of mind like spf 75 sun block, that industrial shit, factory born hear the lunch bell on the horn, an  hour passes the busy bees come back to the floor to join the others to join the masses; the hoard., here the hum of the worker bees at work as they sneek rum in there flasks stuck it in to the hive got it past the queen time to catch a buzz to make this pain stop while i avoid the fuzz the narks at work, cant control it even if they wanted to stop. i dont want to hurt. this was a metaphor for the endless rut of a reality ive become accustomed to; succomed too, the low of the low. comparable to a german trench on the frontlines., my life feels like a conveyer belt, makin the same product running the same direction never really goiong any where, now thats was an analagy, keeping up? yung unsensitive how many? 0 fucks, 0 fucks giveen, 0 blights forgiven, spiteful to death and mornful for noone, nothing left inside just another no-go, malfunctioning product family be like feeling “ i feel like they robbed us” of our brother our son and our friend , dont worry fam im still with you in your hearts up to the end. im tired of our society with all its malice and fallacy, thinking to my self how sad it must be, to be washed in the brain to be hypnotized, this shits so insane.you want that shit super sized? of course nigga watchu you sayin. A glutonous society obsessed with self indulgence people actually still believe good people are in abundance. Speaking of which, fuck the people for a tec, have you looked around lately, this earth is a wreck, mark my words we headin straight for destruction, We are not being good care takers, we fuckckin actin so careless what doesdo the opeople in power really expect?? just pass it on to the next generation “ohh, its not our life time we will leave it for you” Thats a big fuck you to the generations after you undeserving self entitled fucks finallyy croak. get the fuck outa here, tell me when you sold your sold, you heartlesxs bastards would give anything for xsome more of that paper thgat rules all, the pressure you have put on everyone, no one is an exception, to support ourselves and loved ones to provide for our own and multiple other peoples nees, the urge to make money looms over our heads like a pestiliant storm cloud of angst and uncertainty, boreing a fucking whole in our moral, making peoplpe desperaate rising crime rates because people get desperate, people need to survive and they will do dam near whatever it takess to make the money they need, for whatever purpose.  ill whipe my ass with it throw in your cards i will win you better fold. i have freeedom, you ask what? anominity you fuckers, i can moldd my own life i have the freedomm of choosing, i certainly dont have to wait for legislation to pass a bill which you bribed for votes to do so anyways, to do something something much worse than im capabloe of ever doing, intentionally ruining the environment and turning our planet to mars just for paper with and idea (with a “hey, take our word for it, its worth something “””WE PROMISE”””” fucks) behind it not even gold bars, fuck you niggas mark my words illl bring all you mother fuckers down, ill run you fucks out of town, you hear that sound? its a train. its my passion and my determination to take you out, maybe ill use a fuckin plane? i mean its o.k. for the CIA to do it, right? Create this ridiculously elaborote ruse this plot, thyat fucking fooled all the ignorant and brainwashed americans you have already sucked in with your cancerous propaganda, kids lost to your bullshit through social media and the fucking criteria you make teachers teach young minds, we are taught from a very young age that “ huraaahh america is number one! Terrorists bad! Environmental destruction of a planet good!” how about we help some of the third woorld countries (which you know we wouldnt have to be gunning down women and children in the streets) we could just like give them the water they need? help them gentrify there communities teach them how to develop better skills, teach them more efficient ways to take advantage of their land, maybe bring some seeds to food sources that can be grown creating a bit of self sustainability that may not be indigenous but would grow in their country?? you greedy fucks just want oil, when we have enough in our reserves in alaska/canada to last north america 500 years falsey blame others, create an imaginary war “the war on terrorism, which infact is a fucking cover a false entity, to entice patriotism to loosely keep this crumbling empire together the last attempt, the only thread left in the button holding up the pants we call america, you forgot to tell the word all that shit is just whack  [ simply a meticulously pplanned and executed ploy to spur interests in the middle east, control the oil and power will return back east, return to u, Cause god knows you tax the fuck out of us for EVERYTHING especially mnother fucking gas, so we can pay for wellfare and pay for fucking solar power for rich fucks who e==inherited wealth, people who hdont know what working a day means and never will be, never had a problem, never been broke “oh shit my fucking croket set is missingg a ball” lose the pretense fuckers, you cocksuckers, arrogant low lives.. Money makes you any better then the hard working man that cover your tax breaks pay like our fucking ppolice forces (who are a bunch of ROTC drop outs with a badge and sense of power nnow being unfair and crooked taking some kind of revenge on the idea of the kids who picked on them all through out school” Motherfucker its harder to become a plumber, the learning and process is longer/more rigorous then a 6 month police academy which is fucking my lil pony world ( ith ink there is a fantasy kids show for my lil pony with their own fantasy dimension/world)compared to a military bootcamp.  A doctrine instilled to stop the spread of communisim wherever and whenever it may presenet itsxelf? when is the fighting going to stop in that area of our dying earth, thjey have been fighting eachother since lifes initial birth, what whoever was in power or in charge of trading the petroleumn to us wanted to charge an extra dollar 4 dollars  aBARREL instead of 3??? whaa you fucking greedy cunts,? so we invade and take control put there people on dog collars?? for wshat a dollar difference in productionfreedom of speech as you mothers suck the livlyhood from our home like a blood sucking leech, so careless, you know exactly what your doing, you just dont care it aint your problem your headin towardcs the end your death is brewin, well im the reaper of death cloaked in black i always get my man like a cold inwe can hardly co-exist and efficiently function. We are on world one love bob marley shit im getting tired of going throught the motions im all fucked up inside and shit. Early development can be a lynch pin. to either set a strong first corner stone, ceremonial placement of the first corner stone, free mason shit, corn and vegetable oil, so many customs and traditions are goin down a fuckin hill catch em rollin. Early  life is so fucking critical for a young kid, childrens minds are like a sponge they are looking up to their elders they are developing mentally they consume everything around them and retain more than you know, give your kids a healthy and stimulating environment and they will let there talents grow let there talents show let there brilliance flow let there inhibitions go, gone like dust in the wind, never catch em in trouble nothing, not one sin. They will begin to get older, be super organized, super focused for school, every class haxs a folder. As you watch them grow you will feel it in your heart you will fuckin kno, atleast you did this at least you used your parental guidance for good. when you die you know youll be missed, your kid dont throw fits, not one bit, hes such a chip off the old block that was cliche as fuck haha tuck em inh for bed his forhead you kiss. I just might fucking shed a tear, I cant fight this urge to drink a beer. I cant deny this fucking fear, I must look like just like headlights shinin onm a deer, jock strap aroun d my ankles, dumbfounded, look in  my eyes, perplexed, look on my face as it hits, you get a certain taste in your mouth this race is coming to a close suddenly your filled with doubht, seriously you should be care free, yuou did your duty as a parent, im jealous wish that was me, chill the fuck out go drink some fucking relaxing tea or something, sobrietyy seems to be a good mixture along with love and rationality to make a family function like a well greased machine, like a mechanisim freshly whipped down with some white lithium grease. tuned and ready to go, temped to huff the fumes and left everything go, turn your car on shut the garage door, let death grip  you, dont seem to care anymore, I cant change the past and i have no regreats, will i make it to thirty? “right over here people!” “place your bets!”, ill take my tickets to my Life Show and just scalp em make some extra cash, im already absent, so detatched;incapable of feeling. even if im there aint nothing going on emotionally in there (guarantee you im smilin an nodding i really dont give 2 fucks no more”, take that money right to the plug i promote fucking drugs not hugs, or why not both? why does the saying have to be one or the other when sxometimes its both you desire the most. Take the scalpin’ money from the tickets to the play of my life, go on down to the hood, pick up some bags mis amigos habla “Drogas” los hermanos tambien, this urge is hard to fight. Its a romance [a ritual of being, so0mething un explainable i wish i was never a part of, im always metaphorically bleeding. My poker face is strong, fuck showing weakness i alwayxs thought it was to show emotuion. wrong....... but its not, it can save your life, can \get you through, throw you a life jacket, get you out of that tide you fought, that frigid water no warmer than dry eyes.. Ive always been a loose cannon, I go with the flow, not lookin back, been chillin with the old heads they were suprisxed i could hang and, back to the point haha literally or figuratively is the question... im not gonna keep you waitin or leave yall hangin, i hate cliff hangers, make me wait 45 five minutes leave me jonesin’ its slow goin like grindin that ‘crete in the hangers polishin’ that baby out and coatin with some apoxy, its a process, i just get my drugs, whate=vers around and hit bangersz til i pass out, thatsx how my life has been goingg, i feel like im in the chambers just waiting to be gassed out. Flip the fuuckin switch you fuckin pussy end all this malcontent and hate, make itt black, eternal reest at loast.. dress me up real nice maybe a sharp vest, go through the processions and go through the motions fucking burn my body bitches, i want to be in the ocean ive always felt drawn to it, like an unexplainable,, unatainable unfakeable feeling or notion. im happiest sippin a coctail right by the ocean,  thats where you put me to rest... ill be pissed as fuck dont treat me like a fucking ruck; i beenn aroound, age is but a number, my knowledge is  vast and profound, ya thats right bitch im fuckin educated, know more tthan you will learn in your life time and im 20 years, old get what im sayin? i dont got a big heaad im actually humble,  just at my  breaking point. if i was a volcanoe you would feel the rumble; the pre-emptive signs of an eruption pre-determineed in the creator’s mind he took his divine time to find a wayy to grin away the time it took to find the book i bind when al i want is to be stress free and unwind but im the opposite wound up liike the grandfather clock i wish i could stop , the wheels are in motion the gears are set to full speed the feels keep comin i got this itch; this notion, this inkling to stop minglin, stop wastin my time with u useless fuccks. i think its time, its not the end my journey, just started this epic tale of sorrow, my feelings have departed, im fuckingg frozen over colder than ice, dry ice. cant touch me im full of hate and vice, addictive personality on a suicide mission like a ffucking missionary willing to die for his faithh,. i wish man willing to be a martyr for his religion.. ya bitch i smoke stoges in the hotel room just send the  bill to him if it comes to me itll end up in the fucking rubbish bin with a looggie on top coughin up brown shit to young for that talk, to young for heart disease pack and a half a day to try to keep my miind at ease, the stress is buildin im like a tickin time bomb, im so wound up like a clock rigged to blow mount vesuvius, a test nuke... the alarm is soundinn off. A  bright flash like a million lightning strikes, bout to pop off.. but atleast with style got my limited eddition nikes, listen to me i soound like them, listen to me bitching like a fucking fem, bottle it up, thats what society saays, male suicide is at an all time high like two polar opposites due to wed, its never gonna work im always going to be sad im always going to hurt, no fuck it, im a lock it up and throw away the key, im gonna forget about all this shit and be a fuckin G, be hardcore like the brothhers, leave bitches cryin in the street like aall our fuckin mothers, 32 degrees ferenhiet tatted on my left pec it signifies the tempture of my heart no longer warm and red, its frozen over, it hardly beats, that shit is smaler than the grinches, i turned into what they want me to be, a danger to society, getthe fuck outa myface before i shoo,t b, I got nothing to lose, living for nothing, nada, goose eggs nigga dont give a fuck reckless, no regard for life i dont give two fucks a partridge in a ghetto street, aint no merry christmas song, i like my biches thick and dirty wearin'n some fesh tomy thongs, i use em abuse and enthuse them then ruse thm excusse them fuckin confusethem "why you so distaant all of the suden" keep the vow of silence, like a monk on a holy missio, a friar on a divine quest, sending telepathic messages look into my eyes and see, get the fuck out i was never real these feelings meant nothing to me manipulator, manipulationist making up woprds never been a relationist, the masster of his craft a ventrilliquist or a puppet master you were to blind to see, mama was right just a socio path, ya bitch tell your 7 year old child that; see how long his chipper attitude lasts, im lower than nothing, not even a worm maybe i could bbe a fucking tick suckin blood, noting left of the kid i used to be, no more self worth, i cant love you when i cant love myself, how you expect me to support you when all i do is grab a spoon andd melt all the money thaat comes my way, a junkie, bum destined for an early  death and you think yous my bride to be, sorry hun you reaad me wrong, i know its hard cause bitches never know whats goin on inside my head, as i lay in bea,d staring off to somewhere, anywhere but next toyou, staring off into space thinking about my drug abuse, asking myself why, but i know the answer ready to die, but i think ill get a lapper frm one more danceer, i wanna go out in style, not som lame shit maybe go up to a mountain and stand on a cliff, look down, see wher im destined to end up as i take the safety off, finger carressing the trigger, a cool wind blows as i prepare to leave my loved ones bitter, surprised they sstayed aound thislong only ever let em down ever since i was young, never good enough always disappointing this rap comes so easily writing it like noothing, to get this off my chest as theend comes near, i shaped my own destiny i chose to die, now i chose to die here, fuk your beliefs and your faith in gods plan i took my life intomy own fucking hands, i think we all know einstiens theory of insanity, i been doin the same shit fr so long now exspectin shit to change and, i guess im insane.. i took my brilliiant, my sharp mind and put it to waste. its time to pull the inevitable, the good die young idk in this case if thats viable, im scummy i did whatever it took to get my fix to kill that pitt  in my tummy. i hurt people close, i stole from my famil.y.. its time to end it, like i caqme into the world, by myself always alone, soemthing that my father toldme that really stuck, its cynical as fuck, but he was right. he said stay out of the bullshit the groggy muck. Only lookout for yourself son, ive been arounnd awhile, [people dont give a fuck about anyone else they care only for themselves, in the end at the most critical time they will always choose them instead of some one else. We are alone in this wrld and its the hard truth jut learn not to ddepend on others while you are still in your youth, ive been fucked over to many times by people i thought i was very close to. now im out to get mines me and only me you and only you, get that fucking look on ur face sorry for beeing real and telling the truth, im trying to prepare your for whats ahead, im tryig to prevent you from depending on a brutus who will fill you with lead, stab you in the back for their own personnal gain, being to trustworthy is a heroic flaw like being egotistical, wanting to help your friends to much, being aragont ect. kryptonite to super man pease dont be batman and let it be yourr bane, bane as in the villian to let you know. im back, here are my words again not my dads, ji really do miss all the relationships i had, havent spoken to my dad in years tookk one for theteam stayed with mama dukese inj the ssplit to save faace, foir my innocent younger brothers. you know what shes also my motheer, shes not capable of surviving alone i didnt think i would abandon her ever i thought id never do that, i stuck with her out of evveryone, a family oof six she looked out for me in times of strife wish i could give her one last kiss, just shot my last 20 and i fucin missed, absesses dont matte any more i bet this 45 shoots true time for the finale,  no way i can miss, as the curtains close on my young life one last thought people really took to me, like white on rice, women were drawn to me the mystery i had them enticced, June baby as a cancer i am hard to understand i met a chick once who had a spot in my liifes bnd, she knew me we had a connection so much love we were never disrespectin im glad i could atleast i could teach hersome shit before she ripped my beeating heart out of my chest and stepped on it. Loved hermore than life and i still do i promised her one day i would find her and marry her, walkher down that isle say the words ido, she felt what i felt i know its tru, wasnt ready fgor commitment baby i wil alwayslove yo never orget you if i can i connect with you, like a disease i infected you i aways broght you downi was just baggage extra wait holing you down dragging around im glad youo saw through my snake charming ways saw me for who i was a bumm who couldnt change noot in a short number of days, someone so crippled by pain and grief it was beyond belief, she was the only one i wore my heart on my sleeve for , she lef me sobbinig, crrying violently without end in the door the doorway to more pain. i know she had no choice she had to live her lifee i was just in he way, i was obscuring her focus. eye on the prize isthe only way to achieve your goals and tnt them fuckin boulders, in your way, today i die babe, long time comin bet yall thought i was here to stay. baby l dontshed a tear kno i died drinkin a beer haha but nah you were my last thoughts thinking about all the time we spent getting lost in eachothers eyes and gettin so close we read eachothers thougts, illl miss or idk if ill be concious or just nothjingness, i guess ill fnd out when i finally stop being a pussy and proced with this, see ya velma ill always be your shaggy thinka bout me and dont forget what i made you see, in your self im just another memory on our shelf but let it bbe one thaat sticks we had somethingthat made ssense just clicks somethin that felt so right im really gonn miss, everythinig abnout you im sorry you couldnt trust me but i dont doubt why. i know the truth ive never denied a thing in my life, dont getme wrong everybody tells a little white lie, but you know what its a sign of intelligence not to be afraid to say idk not to lie for the hll of it. Ill see you soon in the nxt life or two i hope reincarnatiuon has a possibility of being true, godbye cruel world th ride is over it was a hell of a whirl, i leave you with absolutely nohing conntributted i was just a part o the cancer people had to live with, butnever acknowledgedd, acted ignoant to ther surroundings as daddy paid for college, i burned bright and hot and had a lot of fun, i had alot of life experienc got alot of shit done, nothing productivee of course in ssocieties eyes but i did fullfill atleast some personal goals, important things in my eyes, the curtains are almost done descending as my pittiful life is ending, but keep your pitty mother  fuckers i dont want shit from any of you i dont give yoou nothin dont be so self righteous you look like a bunch of fools, greive for me or celebrate my life i guess its on you how you chhoose to rfemmeber a nobody that nobody knew, a couple feet before the curtains drop, is that? myy eyes decieving? me? no i do see that a single rose descends from the skies, i stare intently at the work of art, a rose is soo beautiful, a representation of love, from the heart, so delicate with its velvet petals, easily ruined a boket wouldve been nice, but who am i fooling, thats a beautiful thing, that was really nice. the product bubbles as i take my last hit of ice, cant takemy eyes off that rose.. its so beautiful... the gun on my forhead now, looking at each individual pedals.. dew from the early mornin forming a small puddle around that naturral phenom, that iconic organic, spectaacular symbol of sometthing real, somethin that matters, something sensual. 

As the bits of his brain splatter behid him, arms spread; with grace, almost angelic.he falls off the ciff a hundred feet now for falling, weird but there was a look of peace in his eyes; on his face, maybe he wll finally find happiness.. he fell with nobility and so much grace the floor he hit, his finall restingplace, what cuold be a better box then a natural setting, a  beaauty of nature, crawling all around and he will return to the earth, the mother wll  take him back just as she gave birth, i thinnk this shit is over now its not my story to tell, inside voices kids no reason to yell. shhhhhhhhhhh. 

dont depend dont believe the [enter here]