#we made them from scratch
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Baking!!









#Baking#!!!!#No one asked for this#but i made brownies yesterday with my partner and it was so fun!!#we made them from scratch#and i thought#I've never made a baking moodboard before!#so here it is#i hope you enjoy#sfw interaction only#agere#sfw agere#moodboard#age regression#agere moodboard#sfw littlespace#age dreaming#food#look at the cute cat oven mitts!!#no pacifier
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"he's only there for ciel's soul" SHUT UP he's the silly and he's there because he's his biological father

#sebastian is my husband and we made ciel from scratch using sugar and heat#VERY CUTESY OF THEM#black butler#kuroshitsuji#ciel phantomhive#sebastian michaelis#dadbastian#o!ciel#yana toboso#mombastian
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Since you’re studying Fine Arts, you’ll paint on this canvas. I’ve drafted some wording here.
WE ARE | EP8
#we are the series#weareedit#phuwin tangsakyuen#poon mitpakdee#aou thanaboon#winny thanawin#marc natarit#peem#pun#chain#tan#Q#my edits#THEY ARE SO STUPID <3#me: almost always makes my colorings from scratch#my gifs: look like 8765678 different people made them <3#i hate not being able to find the coloring™ for any show lol#i always find things i would like to improve or change 😩#i would love to have a style™ like some fellow gifmakers who i am able to IMMEDIATELY RECOGNIZE BY THEIR COLORING AND SHARPENING ALONE 🥺#also this is not me fishing for compliments jdjdskdkd#i just have a certain gifstyle in mind that i’m barely ever able to achieve#and i’m very hard on my self because of it 😅🙈#like i know my gifs aren’t objectively bad#they just don’t look they way i want them to look and i’m being a little bitch about it lol
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ALL of my younger siblings are watching sonic.
Boys…… I might be next.
Im going to fall farther down the sonic fandom hole despite spending YEARS barely toeing the edge, knowing stuff about it but not getting into it. But now….. NOW????
#ill keep yall updated. i watched a couple episodes of prime w them and now theyre going to watch boom and ive seen clips#and it looks pretty funny so maybe….. we watched sonic underground as kids so thats a show of how close for how long ive been looking#over that ledge lol#we have watched ALL the live action(?) movies (pirated the last one) so now we r going into tv shows#why am i here? parents r out of town and IM in charge ;) its been fun we made pizzas fROM SCRATCH last night while watching sonic#anyways this is a rant now so ill leave it here wish me luck#sonic the hedgehog#sorry lmk followers it dont look good
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The tragedy of having my hands full of work until at least next week and suddenly remembering how much I love and miss Lies of P while living my Geats fever because I need stalker!Riders injected on my veins to keep living
#will tag them to manifest to the universe my need of while my hands are too busy — dont mind me#lies of p#kamen rider geats#i already talked about this once on twitter but i was born with a severe case of bRAZILLIAN#just like d2 fed a lot of my aus now lop is my mental playground#im still weak to the steampunk victorian dystopic puppetto made with souls worldbuilding#and i'm just scratching the surface here bc the wake-up call was stalkers with animal masks#like we already have fox and cat volfe siblings you'll always be famous#so technically i would change them to fit geats and na-go - prob make one white and the other yellow instead of red and black#but also wHAT DO YOU MEAN WE DONT HAVE A BULL STALKER— 'its a buffalo'#AND NOT A RACCOON— 'tanukis are not raccoons'#for real tho mad donkey is this *okay emote* close from buffa#and going one floor deeper ergo / giragira hello jyamato and puppets manifesting memories of the dead hELLO#another floor deeper and a godly figure turned into tree/stone //drums#i'm not even mentioning 'idealized child created post-mortem' bc since pinocchio this is a staple but hEY#prob here just like my d2/lop au i would subvert sophia's role bc casuals would think of tsumuri which /fits/ but so would ace#'polux why do you create so much aus if you barely do anything with them' BECAUSE ITS A CURSE ITS MY FATE I'M DOOMED TO AU#technically they help me have inspos for my own original ideas but while i have my own jobs i can't really work on them so i stick to aus
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me and my friends couldnt go to the bravern cafe back in march, so we coped by making our own cafe merch
#leon-art#bang brave bang bravern#i refuse to tag all of them i dont have the energy for that#this is just gonna be me rambling at the bottom btw about the cafe#sooo for the cafe we also made food from the menu and we decided on the curry and pancakes#and then we made the cupiridas drink and isami goop drink lol#we were fighting for our lives tho cuz we basically made everything from scratch i had to spend like 30 mins trying to make black ice cream#and then for the merch my friend made isami lulu and smith stickers and a bravern postcard#also she made them into big posters too lol#and then i made designs for all of teh deathdrives and bravern to make into coasters for all of us#i still have yet to make them tho cuz college and work has been kicking my ass
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nothing makes me feel like a golden god quite like a new recipe turning out delicious on the first try. unfortunately, conversely nothing makes me feel more 'I am god's mistake' than spending all that time and effort on something and having to make a sandwhich b/c the results were inedible if you want to retain your capacity for delight. the duality of home chef
#it's only been a couple of times in the last like six years I've made something truly unpalatable#(and at least two of them were not on me I think the recipes were misguided from the start in hindsight)#but man it's such a downer every time haha it makes me feel like the ultimate failure. I shame everyone who's ever held a spatula. woe#but NOT TODAY! that shit rocked I did good#I have been slowly leveling up my preparing beans from dry game and I think I'm finally reaching a place of consistently ok results!#(that was never something we did at home when I was growing up and not something my mum does either so I had to start from scratch#it's really a big help to come from a home where we do a lot of communal cooking tho! having some basics down is good)#I am also realizing that if I ever get a partner they are um. unlikely to be quite as contented as me with eating pretty much the same stuf#a good two thirds are just variations on stir fry. for years at a time lol. so expanding my reportoir of recipes could be a wise investment#also I don't care for most meat so also finding good vegetarian/vegan recipes (b/c there are tricks to making it amazing!)
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tbh i wish aup had more reps for characters who achieve greatness purely through hard work and effort. the emphasis on genius/being special is mayhaps way too much to the point that it feels kinda damn depressing for those who aint born as one.
#rant#why is everyone in aup a genius#the four musketeers have the potential for this but its unfortunate that we dont get to see it fleshed out#even aiden ended up relying on his antimagic talents in the long run#ngl owens would have been more impressive to me if they r hardworkers instead of born special#it would have made the fact that ludger took them in more interesting#and mayhaps even highlighted his qualifications as a teacher#(lowkey im still salty that we dont get the full arc of ludger teaching magic to arpa lmfao)#(owens growth feels much less impactful to me bc they are already so special that them becoming that OP is nothing surprising)#plus i thought fighting against the unfairness of the world was a theme for owens#even if one managed to close the gap between the wealthy and the poor or noble and non-noble#the division between a genius and a non-genius itself would only create another kind of classism#how r they gonna challenge it as the members of the one and only special talent club?#violetta is the closest to be the hardworking one but even then her achievement still has a hand of a devil in it#also while surna had to learn everything from scratch he had been around for hundreds if not thousands of years#not to diminish his achievements but that hardly counts cuz it still puts him next to the special treatment category#not to mention being able to learn something simply by observing it is also a kind of cheat code itself...
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I don't like debating much(unless necessary for the sake of my own humanity) but sometimes it can be really Really fun specifically if it's about something that has absolutely no real weight to it(and yet if you were a spectator it might cause some concern for whatever reason)
for example: would you rather be threatened(physically mentally or emotionally take your pick) by a can of corn or a cob of corn?
Me personally I'd pick cob for a few reasons
1. I can outlast it(probably)
Fresh corn will eventually rot and decay but have you seen how long canned stuff can last unopened before it looks slightly different from new stuff??
2. Cans are made of metal not vegetable flesh
While a corn cob has its core that's not metal. Ever dropped a can? Might get a dent. If you have a good kick then you might survive but you will probably hurt your foot. Ever dropped corn? If it had it outer leaves and hair it might have stood a chance but if it didn't then bits of corn go everywhere
3. Actually fighting if needed
I feel like I could survive a fight with a sentient can but a sentient cob just seems less likely to hurt
However there are some things might change my decision
Like issue one which is how the corn moves because if the cob is fresh with hair and leaves and can move all the little hairs individually and can move the leaves then I'd probably choose the can because at that point I feel like it's less of "how would i survive with the least amount of bruising" and more of "how would I rather die but with a chance of surviving" and in my opinion i think blunt force trauma would be better then a slow death of strangulation via a sentient corns hair plus I do think I'd have a chance against a can of corn
Another issue is if it was mentally or emotionally I'd probably go with the can bc I feel like it would be easier for to rationalize it as ridiculous to be threatened by a can of corn then a cob for some reason
Like a cob is ridiculous to the point that I'd just accept it as making sense for that to happen?
a can is like "why am I listening to the can of corn. I literally own a can opener." But a cob is more like "if I were to try and deal with you in the traditional way of dealing with corn that would mean a pot and water and time and-"
Plus idk why but I feel like a cob would be less mean with its words. I can't explain it I just think cob would just go straight to physical threats instead of emotional ones but a can would stare at you menacingly making you question yourself and just judging you
#the part where some might be concerned is the fact that after coming up with that scenario it took me 3 seconds to decide on my awnser#this corn convo scenario didnt actually happened but ive had many similar convos#this may or may not make any sense but thats the fun of it in my opinion :D#the other part that concerns people so i dont tend to say it out loud as much is the “how would you rather die” part#so many people are just so uncomfortable with death they try to avoid discussing it at any cost even though its somthing coming for us all#its kinda sad#like i do get it. its hard to not only accept but really think about death as a reality#people dont like it when something good can end so they try to avoid it and try to deny it#its hard to look at something that youve been ingrained to consider as “bad” and see it as anything else#i feel like recognizing the fact that something will end can help you cherish it more in the present#and if you can recognize the good and accept that it will end you can also morph that when thinking about the bad#life isnt simple and neither is death#bad moments come and good moments come and bad moments and good moments and bad moments and good moments ect#is it really so weird that i dont ignore it?#like im going to die eventually welcome to reality but thats not right now.#right now i have blood moving in my arteries and veins right now im breathing and blinking periodically#right now im still alive and i intend to do the most i can with whatever time i have even if im still fighting myself to do basic tasks#its kinda sad that so many people think its better to ignore that our time is limited#maybe its just the way i grew up#i didnt face death a lot but my family moved every few years and whenever i met another kid i used to know it was never the same person#we were both different in ways that made it seem like we were entirely new people#i had to get to know them a second time practically from scratch so every time either one of us left there was always a part of me that knew#when one of us left we were done#like sure we could get to know each other again but it would never be how it had been#we would be new people to each other#idk i think that made it easier for me to accept the existence of death and not taking things for granted#like stuff happens life goes on make the best of it and make friends with everyone possible while it lasts#idk sheesh this started as me being like “i like weird and slightly stupid debates” and ended as “i have opinions on peoples veiws of death”#whatever hope my point is made i guess. good job making it this far? give me stupid questions pls(also 30 tag limit who knew: me now)#brains rambles
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There is a really painful self defeating irony in people who gatekeep goth/punk/emo subcultures.
All of these subcultures are pretty broad and fluid and were formed so outcasts can band together, but if there is ONE "rule" if it can even be called such it is to stand against and question authority.
And then you have some someone come in claiming to be an authority on the subject of a group of rebels and starts policing who is allowed in this collective under the impression it's a secret club and not reclaimed words we have adopted that were once used to belittle and suppress us-
My actual sibling in Christ, Lucifer or whatever Gods you do or do not follow HOW have you SO THOROUGHLY missed the point.
You have become the authority you were supposed to rebel against.
#“real” goth/punk/insert subculture here dont gatekeep. support your outcested siblings dont out them down#can we just not apply 'its a spectrum' to things that arent gay or mental illness????#and make no mistake i want these people to realize they are not helping#but i am never going to tell them theyre kicked out of the Secret Club for fucking up and being confused because that is not how we do shit#like also this is a 'i am still wearing these beat up jeans bc im poor and im owning it' ;#i could write an essay on how subcultures and how their fashion was a direct result of ecenomic states of specific decades#people think emo and grunge have both just existed forever and exist in a vacuum and i am????#telling people they have to make all their clothes themselves or theyre a poser is acrually abelist and missing the point#the point is we used ro be made fun of for not having the money to make the right clothes#now your excluding your siblings for not having the time to make it from scratch#homie grunge was the result of 'what was possible for poor people'#and right now it is a lot less affordible and accessible to distress your own jeans than to biy pre distressed plastic that looks like jeans#DO YOU KNOW HOW EXPENSIVE JEANS ARE???????#like also this is a 'i am wearing beat up stuff and owning it' vs#'inliterally cannot addord to reduce the lifespan of this garment by distressing it'#homie my 2 dollar baby blue shirt made with slave labor i bought on clearence is more 'grunge' by your standards than#the 20 dollar flannel you boyght ar goodwill that is being sold for more than 3 times what it was originally bought for#because no one WANTS to support megacorps but the system were fighting doesnt give us an option.#im not jesus if i have to chose between ethically sourced things (nevermind the reasearch to prove that claim isnt a lie)#and EATING THAT DAY GEUSS THE FUCK WHAT BUTTER CUP IM BYING THE RICE AND THE BLOOD POLYESTER#not buying a shirt isnt an option bc then u get fired from your job and have even less money ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#this is just turning into a other povert awareness rant because most of these groups had fundamental origins in poverty#and people are twisting that history to suit their needs#'uhm AcHkTuAlLy you can just do this alternative to avoid supporting-' eat a dick no i cant#like ask yourself 'would i vibe check a homeless person for doing this?' because one of the problems is like#people assume if you have housing in any capacity you are somehow... actually fine and just mismanaging money???#eljin talks#........i hit the tag limit#i deleted tsgs so i could tag actual subcultures but jk im a fucking coward#sigh you win this time anxiety
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retroactive jealousy i hate u !!!
#why am i like this#i hate being like this !!#i wish i could just not care about it but i can't !!!!!#we didn't even know abt eachother back then and yet i feel sick#it's not even anything major#my bf showed me a pic of him and this friend who he told me in the past he had held hands with when they were on a friend trip together#this past summer#and his friend sent him the pic and it was a goofy little pic of them together and his friend said smth like 'wow she made u do that'#and my bf replied 'pussy makes u do anything' which first of all gross i thought he was better than that#and secondly#he never told me he liked her#he told me she held his hand bc she was drunk#now he claims he doesn't like her at all bc of something she did back then on the trip that made him loose all respect for her#and like#i'm scared to ask more#but i'm like 80% sure that she probably gave him back and head scratches bc thats like the first thing he asked for when we got together#and i feel like he would take any opporotunity to get his head scratched bc he loves it sm#and i do not want to think about him getting head scratches from someone else tyvm#i wish this feeling would just go away#i got a new keyboard and my nails are super long so it's simultaniously (whatever) easier and harder to type#give me tips on retroactive jealousy
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oh my god. that one "oc" we wrote who had DID that we came up with before our syscovery. that was not an oc. oh my god cody and blake why did you take five years to make yourselves known to us-
#AND WHY DID YOU GET FRONT TRIGGERED BY A RANT REVIEW OF A MOVIE BASED ON A PSEUDO-ROMCOM BOOK???#question not necessarily directed at them but the structure of our system as a whole#we've been doing a lot of discovering of headmates who were FOR SURE around before our proper syscovery#most of whom we. conceptualized as paracosm characters i guess to cope?? and mask without knowing??#which is probably why our paracosm is inseparable from our system they are one and the same#but like. i mean we found the whole valley full of elder scrolls introjects (there were 11 of them. at once)#who at least with Aerina and Serana they both were around when we were 14 at the very least#bc aerina holds a shocking amount of memories of high school that we thought we'd just Lost Forever#like. she actually remembers what our classrooms looked like#we know that the Sides (like. of the sanders variety) that we made for ourselves. like our own Sides#most of them became true headmates but we're not sure about the rest... but they're probably here#Cecil and Cherry (intrusive thoughts and creativity) were some of our very first known members#cecil was the first actually. but we know he wasn't the first to form bc Sheo hiding his presence ANNOUNCED cecil to ruby the host from then#and like. we created our own versions of sides for every one that was in the actual series#but then There Were More. like 6 or 7 who wouldn't ever have been included in the series#and we were like 'we dunno why they're here BUT they're supposed to be OUR sides so of course there's differences!' and then.#and one of those was Aura who was our side that represented autism#we also had Ryker (anger issues) Oakley (obsession/hyperfocus) Aiden (adhd) and one that represented faith (like. spiritual and stuff)#don't remember the faith one's name it was something obscure#and seeing as like. 5 years after our syscovery we actually discovered Analise (our Logic side) in the sys#we probably have All Of Them somewhere#so like. cody and blake were from the first character we ever wrote who had DID#similar to our first trans character. writing it as if im someone on the outside when really we were just an egg carton#we didn't write Much of him but we put much work into making him like. not fulfill bad stereotypes#he was still kind of stereotypical but we were 15 and an egg carton#but like. we haven't thought abt him or his story like. Since Then#so. very odd that they both show up here and right now-#cody was supposed to be the host and blake was the only alter we actually came up with before abandoning that story like most we wrote#there were absolutely going to be more but. we never got to that point in the story#mostly bc something we were co-writing with someone else fell apart so we just started All of our projects over from scratch
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I am getting so tired of having to check everything new for AI shit. Sometimes its hard to notice or find out (if it's not just art) and so often I dont even think to check. A new game comes out and seems fun, you buy it and learn a few days later that the main dev/devs are apparently advocates for using AI for just about anything. I'm tired. I don't want to have to go through this shit so often.
#shut up yoi#this is about Palworld specifically#grabbed it since a friend i rarely get to play with these days got super into it and I wanted to spend time with them#the hype from so many streamers i follow also made it feel like yeah this seems fun!#i enjoy a generic survial game well enough and despite it being absolutely wack and weird it scratched the itch#then the next day i come across translated tweets of the main dev/producer being all about AI shit#i clocked in too many hours to get a steam refund at this point and now i feel bad for not checking for that bullshit beforehand#it's a fun enough experience that i enjoyed the game so far but now i feel bad for even owning it#fuck me why can't we have nice things#I don't want to have to go on an internet detective adventure every time a new thing i want to buy to see if the creators have morals or no
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I will be resurrecting my Gogeta (Primary) and Vegito (secondary) blog.
#ooc#the blog holds a dear place in my heart but i have to restart from scratch#i lost the password to it so im remaking it to write them again and to pay homage to it#if anyone remembers it the original history of the blog is the fact it was made to write with a friend who we had extensive lore with our#blogs on it#that was mainly the only reason it existed
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maybe now that i have adhd meds i can attempt Language again
#i mean ok i had them before but different ones & they didnt work. but i think what im on now is what i was on in hs & those Did work#(& then i stopped bc i was like well i am not in school anymore i dont need these. & then. i moved out. and oops i do need them actually)#(unfortunately due to the adhd & also my medical records having gone fucking missing somehow(???) it um. took a while)#but ough i must learn words......... i just need to Actually set aside time for it . and like keep a fucking notebook im not making the#mistake i made with french where i start out like oh this is easy :) & then it gets harder but i havent been taking any notes & now idk How#& so i just give up. we are not doing that this time we are taking notes From The Start and figuring out what works .#but...... probably not this month. this month is Busy. maybe august..........#thats actually a little bit of a lie bc i Have already started theres a podcast w some basics that i have on my work mp3 player#buuuut its been a minute & also Because i only listen to it at work im not really able to pick up on everything. so im basically still#kind of starting from scratch lmao.#honestly my biggest complaint w the podcast is that like. while it does have a sheet w the translations it doesnt have Pronunciation & bc i#have auditory processing issues i cant actually figure out How they are saying certain words just by hearing them.... bc i dont know that i#actually hearing them Correctly. fucking cannot identify sounds disorder killing me over here#doesnt help that its a language where pronunciation is Quite Different than english lmao......#i did find a pronunciation cheat sheet online somewhere & i . bookmarked it? downloaded it? sent myself a link on discord? fuck idr#but i also dont know if theres significant differences in dialect between the two. idk what dialect the cheat sheet was even made.. for? in#whatever ykwim its 6:30am i need to sleep
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i LOVE first contact with aliens stories, seriously it’s one of my favorite tropes, but authors writing it really need to understand that there’s no writing it without engaging with the colonial history behind it whether you intend to or not, and if your story is about humans settling on another planet you’re gonna look stupid if you don’t
#also like. idk how to put it into words but.#if your excuse for why humans are leaving earth is because it’s become uninhabitable. it will always always ALWAYS be easier#to try and fix earth than to start over somewhere else#literally even if earth has nothing but rocks it STILL has more going for it than even the most habitable exoplanet#at least earth has air we can breathe gravity we can bear and is in the habitable zone#and it’s not full of potential allergens or plants/animals that we can’t eat#and we *already know* what’s edible and useful on earth which we’ve learned over millennia#and also. hand waving all the shit like allergens and inedible flora/fauna.#if your colonial humans are scratching a living from the soil and trying to find a niche for themselves in the local ecology.#ugh what am i trying to say here#like. *mean girls meme* so you DO acknowledge that ‘primitive’ technology is the best tools for this job?#but it’s more than that. like okay these colonists are doing the best they can with what they have and so they’re not ‘primitive’?#so you admit that the best way to ensure survival for future generations is to live sustainably?#i get it. i get it. i love made up alien ecologies and i love survival stories#but there’s gotta be (there is i’ve read it) a better way to tell them that doesn’t trash indigenous people while having your characters#live like them#like??? that’s what i’m trying to say. there’s some cognitive dissonance here#i’m trying to tell a story about people doing colonizing and having them live off of and understand the land#*IN not i’m
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