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claybefree · 3 years

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Seeing as it's the twentieth anniversary, I guess I should post this again

September Third, Two Thousand and Nine

For years whenever anyone asked me when my son Henry was born I’d start to say September instead of August 25, 2001. Sunday he had his eighth birthday party at his mother’s house, and I stayed here. Most of his mother’s friends don’t care for me much. The feeling is mutual. Tonight coming home from work I started stitching what I’m about to write together in my mind and suddenly got very afraid. I thought for a moment that I was about to go get drunk, which might very likely be death for somebody like me. I was sure I was going to change direction of the truck, that I’d drive the same route I always did back then, that I would stand by the register and stare at the bottle in my hand without really knowing I where I was. I think it has to do with the weather finally changing and perhaps that Henry’s mom and I are no longer together. I sat on the porch of my little house and called a friend and told him all this. He listened and after a while I felt better, which is exactly how these things should go. When we decided we were done he told me I should go in and write all this down.

I worked on through that whole day. Most everybody else on the job had stopped and listened to each of the radios on the different floors or cried. The asshole Turks I was framing a bathroom for wouldn’t let me quit. They had tile to run. I found it made me feel better to keep going anyway. The laborers cussed me when I asked them to move so that I could use the table saw, a natural gathering spot on any job. They seemed to think I was calloused or hard-hearted and it was because I was from Tennessee. It just now occurred to me that maybe they were right.

That afternoon, when it was determined safe to walk across the bridges, most of the job, the other carpenters and trades-people, wandered home to Brooklyn or Queens. Me and the two left to close everything up had it different as we lived in Jersey. Anthony, the boss, was big and red-haired, red faced and lived in Hoboken. Duane was in charge of demolition and waste, was a little shorter and darker, and lived in Secaucus or maybe somewhere west of that I think. They squared off on each other frequently. It always reminded me of two walruses going at it on a beach.

Whenever we went out to the bar afterwards Anthony would have a Bud tall boy in each hand at all times, the waitress would come up with four for him whenever we sat down. On the job we liked to yell at each other, I once told him I was doing him a favor by giving him such an easy target, and he never missed an occasion to oblige me. Duane was a single dad, dark haired with deep sunken yet kind eyes that always seemed to have bags under them. One of the black laborers told him once he was the most Uncle Fester looking motherfucker he had ever seen. I tended to agree.

We locked the job up at four I think, humped it across the park through the smoke to the A-train. There was smoke forming a mist around the trees of central park that day. There were no flower children loitering at Yoko’s “Imagine” monument to barge through. Our thinking was to get downtown to the Path train. We had no idea that two of the stations had been destroyed. It didn’t matter, we were underground fifteen minutes before Anthony vetoed the idea. People were running wild through the stations, on the trains, everything was panic and Oh Fuck and Anthony had no intention of being underground. He had a funny look on his face that I couldn’t figure out. It wouldn't occur to me until later that the big man was very afraid.

In the years since I have always wondered why people have reacted so strongly from that day. Later we would go to war because of a something that happened one day in New York City and this has always seemed really strange to me. I guess what I mean is that I was there and never wanted to kill anybody because of it. Most of the time I just thought it was very strange and sad and mostly just very interesting. I only remember ever crying about it twice. The first time was a few months afterward, I had quit Anthony to stay home with Henry. Part of our routine was to watch Sesame Street. One day in the winter there was a skit where Elmo got very scared because of some smoke and noise that was never identified. I suppose in this case it was a nameless fear. A New York City fireman came on screen and hugged him, told him it was okay to be scared, Elmo, and that everything would be alright. I remember little red furry Elmo hugged the fireman tight. I held Henry in my lap and cried into his fine blonde hair.

It was the fireman that did it. I still get upset when I think about the firemen. I have had a lot of trouble with cops in different times in my life, but I never had a problem with any fireman I ever encountered, drunk or otherwise. They seem to me to be a different animal entirely.

Anthony, Duane and me ran into two firemen on the deck of the cruise boat that carried us across to Weehawken. They came in and collapsed on the painted metal floor, shedding boots and letting their helmets roll away. Some people applauded weakly, others asked questions, they just stared at us and said nothing. It didn’t occur to me until much later they were probably the only ones from their station who lived. Other men that for years they worked with, ate and fought with, got drunk with were dead. There was a bar I frequented in Jersey City a few blocks from our house where a couple of weeks later I saw three firemen in dress uniforms. One was between his partner on a stool and the third who was older and may have been a captain. The captain was clearly upset, swaggering and poking the other two in the chest. Everybody else was trying hard not to pay attention to what seemed about to develop into a fight. I think later I saw the old man leaning against the bar and weeping openly, he must have been sixty at least.

I got drunk in this bar Sept. 10th while my wife and kid slept back home. She’d start nursing and pass out with him and I’d head out to roam. The thing I liked about this place was the Sinatra on the jukebox, so that night I loaded it up and sat at the bar listening. I think it was the first time I’d ever heard “Summer Wind.” The tattooed brunette tending bar must have thought it was cute because she serenaded me, singing along with a couple of the songs. There was another man with a mustache further down the line who was putting the blast on her and didn’t seem to like me much so I got the fuck out early. By “early” I mean I didn’t close the place.

I won’t tell you what we saw on the boat ride across the Hudson, you’ve seen it already. We unloaded at Weehawken and everyone, thousands of high end refugees really, started walking south towards Hoboken where we had been told there were buses waiting to take us home. I noticed that even wearing boots, the three of us walked faster than the others. We were construction workers living and working around Manhattan and we were very good at walking. I remember being comforted by walking with them. Hundreds of buses lined the streets of Hoboken and the three of us walked the length of that town. Anthony broke off about halfway to head home. A couple of weeks later I showed up having laid out drunk for two days and told him I had come for my tools. He looked at me and didn’t say a word. He mailed me my check. I haven’t seen the man since.

Duane and me trudged the rest of Hoboken together. I heard that not soon after I left he was let go to cut costs and that not long after that he got into a bad time with a prostitute on rt. 1 & 9. The smoke in Hoboken was thicker than in the city and the fumes from streets filled with idling buses finally got my hangover to officially kick in. I told Duane about how I’d had “Summer Wind” playing as background music in my head all day. He laughed and began singing the song, each line perfectly. We got through the crowd easily, after hours of walking together we had finally hit a stride together. We were marching, really. There was the giant blue sky of the day broken intermittently by smoke and there was the roar of diesel noise and Hoboken and Duane singing Summer Wind to me; some punk kid from Tennessee who had no business being there.

The only other incident I remember having to cry because of some assholes who decided to fly planes into tall buildings was coming across the Manhattan bridge one night after carrying my sister-in-law home to Park Slope. She would come over most nights to hang out with the baby, and around eleven or so and in various states of sobriety I’d be asked to drive her back home. I never hated the terrorists for invoking a War of Terror, I hated them for causing enough terror that it fucked the roads up. Shit got closed for what seemed no fucking reason whatsoever. One day coming back from the pediatrician’s office, Henry got stuck howling in his car seat for four hours because the Holland Tunnel was handling too much traffic and we were too afraid to take him out of it because of the cops everywhere. My sister-in-law and I spent a lot of time in the Saturn together on the nights I drove her home. I can’t remember what we talked about, probably everything. I haven't spoken to my sister-in-law since I moved out last summer.

This particular night the Brooklyn Bridge was only operating east-bound into Brooklyn so after I dropped her off I was diverted back across the Manhattan Bridge in order to get back into the city and eventually home. The Manhattan Bridge back then was still under renovation and I guess has always been the ugly, cross-eyed cousin of the Brooklyn Bridge. I got stuck on it, moving slower than shit, and staring at trash and old faded plywood encasing the little bit of wrought iron and Neo-Classical elements that were left up by the arch. Off to the left t seemed as though the entirety of Downtown was illuminated from the work lights that were set up down by Ground Zero. Downtown glowed with lights that were set up to look for people that weren’t there anymore. The DJ on WFMU that night was playing a super slowed down cover of the B-52’s Song for a Future Generation. If you’ve heard it, you’ve probably laughed, it’s a ridiculously chirpy pop song. I’ve always loved it. The lyrics go a little like this:

Wanna be the ruler of the galaxy

Wanna be the king of the universe

Let`s meet and have a baby now

In between each stanza, the different members give spoken-word tidbits of information about themselves. For example Ricky, the original guitarist, was a Pisces and “loved computers and hot tamales.“ Ricky also died from AIDS back in 1985 when people still had no idea what the disease was.

The version I heard that night had slowed the tempo to that of a blues song. The dip-shit ironic hipster that sang it reflected this. Stuck on the bridge it felt as though I was listening to a lament. What reduced me to tears, smoking Winstons in my little Saturn station wagon, was the feeling that whatever was left of innocence had recently been or was about to be brutally murdered by pig-face, ignorant men. Wanna be the first lady of infinity. Wanna be the nicest guy on earth. Let's meet and have a baby now.

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dibidibifiction · 3 years

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A Hundred-dollar Bill: PART 4

Warning: foul language, fluff Word count: 1.9k

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction made for personal entertainment of readers. The writer does not ever intend to offend her readers nor does she aim to spread false information about anyone as to pay any disrespect to the real-life persons whom the characters are based on. She also does not claim ownership to any of the images that are being used.

masterlist PART 3

I gently pull away from Taemin’s cuddle to get up. He immediately rolls his whole body the other way, finding Kibum who is spooning Minho on the other side. Once again, I stare at all my best friends. This time they’re sleeping so soundly and this, for me, is enough to provide me comfort. However, I somehow feel sorry for getting them into this mess.

I adjust this one blanket for them to squeeze in.

I grab Minho’s cigarette pack and head to the roof of the building to wait for the sun to rise.

Once I’m sat on the dirty, dusty cement, I light a cigarette to my satisfaction.

I think of my parents. I don’t really believe in life after death but I genuinely hope they’re happy and together wherever they may be. I wish there was a way to let them know how much I miss them. Also, I really hope they don’t see how I’m doing right now because my dad would for sure beat me up.

“Hey, can I get a hit of that?” I hear someone say after a couple of minutes of my alone time.

I turn my head to look behind me. It’s Taemin. “Oh, hey.”

“That ‘hey’ doesn’t sound like you’re happy to see me,” he giggles. He takes the cigarette from my lips and then to his.

“A singer isn’t supposed to smoke, right?”

“Who says I’m a singer?”

I stare at him in confusion after I light myself another stick. “Spill it.”

“Nobody knows this. Well, except for Kibum Hyung since he’s all for social media and happened to find the article. Thanks for looking it up by the way,” he jokes. “About a month ago,” he starts. “Euisoo Hyung handed me the news that he handled my situation and proved to the media and to everybody that the rumors about me are wrong. I don’t know how he did it, I didn’t ask, but I’m just grateful. Not to mention relieved. He said that I can get back to work as soon as I’m ready. And I asked him to give me some time to think about it.”

“What? Taemin, what’s there to think about? This is your dream.”

“It was. I already lived it for six years and I couldn’t feel more honored and fortunate, but…” He hesitates.

“But what?”

He sighs. “I have a new dream. I realized that living a lowkey life made me happier, less pressured, especially with the person I love. I decided to go back to the original plan, which is to become a dancer. Not exactly a singer,” he says, tipping the cigarette butt out of his hands.

I watch his eyes twinkle under the upcoming sunrise sky. There is not a drop of doubt that he’s really sure about this. I always wondered how hard it was for him to recover from all the hate, and his fans cancelling on him. He didn’t really open up this deeply. Now, here he is, rising from the ashes.

“Last night, when I went out while Kibum Hyung rested, I talked to Euisoo Hyung again.”

“Really? And?”

“He told me that I’m going to have a meeting with the board of the directors about my choreography and songwriting career. Turns out there still is a reputation to ruin I just realized. So…”

“So what happened last night can’t happen again,” I finish his thought.

“Well, not everything that happened. There are some moments I want to make happen again.” He gives off a grin, trying not to giggle at his own flirty information.

“Wait, let’s get back to that part where you mentioned somebody you love. What’s that about exactly?” I join his kidding around.

Now he can’t hold his laugh.

We stare at each other for a while as the laughter fades. Slowly, he begins to lean into me to gently put his lips onto mine. Then carefully slides his tongue against mine as they start to dance together.

It feels different this time. It’s more tender and more passionate. It’s less wild but more gentle. Less lustful but more pleasant. Less exciting but more caring.

He pulls away. “Look, I know we’ve never talked about this. Us. I never brought it up because I want everything to stay the same and I don’t want to fuck it up.”

“Yeah, I know, me too. I like the way we are.” I smile brightly at him, involuntarily. I take a deep breath as I’ve decided to say what I’m about to say. “I love you though.”

Tears form in his eyes like they wanted to say the same thing to me. I watch them close as he starts kissing me again.

The sun has come up which marks the end of everything reckless and rebellious and the beginning of something prudent and responsible.

. . .

We wouldn’t see one another for months after that day. We lived separately for a bit to focus on our own lives, to be better.

But we did hang out from time to time, just not as often as we did before. Lucky for us, we had each other—we still do—to realize that it’s never too late to start over. It’s from each other where we learned that each of us is like a hundred-dollar bill. No matter how much we’re folded, crumpled, and stepped on, we never lost our value.

We never experienced what it was like to be living free as youngsters because our lives fucked us up so early. That’s also why we lived it in our late twenties. Although one certain thing we know is that we have no regrets, especially after we found each other.

It is now six years later and so much has changed. Our individual lives have never been better, and we’ve never been happier.

Taemin is now a well-known, well-esteemed singer turned choreographer and songwriter, working with famous pop groups and soloists. He would make a comeback once in a while as a singer but it doesn’t become his priority.

Four years ago, just a year after his career peak, Taemin showed Kibum’s secret sketched designs to a famous designer he worked with for some time for his comeback.

Long story short, Kibum finished fashion school where he was sponsored by that same designer, who also became his mentor. Later on, his social media following started growing and he would be interviewed and be featured by different magazine and publishing companies. He would work on his own clothing line little by little in collaboration with various famous fashion icons.

Minho served the military for two years after he ran away from his father, who patched things up with him recently. After his military service, he reunited with his former soccer coach in college and they trained day and night without taking any breaks at all. I would cook and prepare us a picnic, then the rest of us would visit him in the field. He would soon make the national team. And after being reserved in the bleachers for so long, just months ago, he was responsible for their team’s rare championship and is awarded as the Most Valuable Player this season. Now, Minho becomes one of the famous successful football players who peaked in their thirties.

. . .

As I’m tidying up for closing, I hear the bell ring as somebody enters my bakeshop. I turn around to see Taemin, who instantly puts a smile on my face.

“Hey, you,” he greets with a warm hug.

“Hi,” I say before placing a sweet kiss on his lips. “I’m almost ready. Hold on a second.”

After I check all the lights in the back rooms and am about to walk out the front door, all ready to go, I catch Taemin lost in thought. He admires the place, then looks at me. Staring at me with twinkle in his eyes.

“What wrong?” I ask.

“Nothing,” he shakes his head and loses eye contact. “I’m just so proud of you,” he says, trying not to smile so widely.

This was the same café where Kibum and I first had lunch. This was the place where our friendship grew. This was where the rest of our lives began. When I found out that they were selling it a year ago, I had no second thoughts and did everything to get it. And now, here we are.

“Yeah, well,” I grab both of his hands and sigh in serenity and bliss. “I am proud of us.”

He looks at the ground, cringing all of a sudden.

I wrap my hands around his neck to draw him closer, and kiss him tenderly, catching his tongue on mine.

He hums in pleasure. “Do we still have time?”

I pull away, laughing at him. “No, we don’t.”

He sulks and shows a childish sad face.

“Come on. We’re late to meet the guys.”

After a half an hour drive, we arrive at Kibum’s newly renovated, newly furnished house. Now’s only the first time we’re all visiting because he wanted it to be a surprise. When I finally recognized the place, it made me almost cry. Even though he changed almost all its features, it still brought back the memories we shared out here. It’s the place where we broke in six years ago, almost getting caught by the police.

While Taemin goes in through the front door to deliver the cake I baked and the champagne we brought, my impulse orders me to head to the backyard where the swimming pool was located.

I catch Minho out on the patio, grilling meat and sausages. I spy the rest of the area, and my sight lands on the swimming pool. Turns out it’s the only feature that hasn’t changed. Although, it’s way cleaner and way more gorgeous.

I can’t help but let the tears fall.

Minho finally sees me when he takes a sip of his beer. “Y/n, hey, you’re here!” He was about to welcome me with open arms but then he notices that I’m crying. “What’s wrong?”

My voice breaks. “I know it’s silly, but it’s just we had such memories here, and now we’re—” I can’t go on. I’m already weeping.

“Come here,” he hugs me anyway and places a peck on my forehead.

“Minho, what’s going on out there?” Kibum finally appears, Taemin following behind him holding four glasses in between his fingers and the bottle of champagne in his other hand..

“Nothing!” I say, holding back tears even though there’s no point.

“Oh, honey.” Kibum reaches out and wraps his arms around me. Taemin and Minho are behind me embracing each others’ hellos too.

So we have dinner at Kibum’s patio. Later on in the night, we all jump into the very swimming pool that I never thought I would see again. Back then, I thought I’d have to cherish every moment because I might not be able to live it again. But that moment happens again right now. And it will keep on happening.

We bond all night like we always have. Minho’s competitive rock-paper-scissors, Taemin’s harsh tickling, and Kibum’s savage comments. Although this time, we’re not fucked up adults anymore.

Once again, I propose a toast. “To fucking friendship.”

“To fucking friendship!”

#taemin x reader #taemin fanfic #shinee fanfics #SHINee FanFic

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aerialflight · 4 years

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Fic Recs

I haven’t done this in a while, recommending fics. But there were some fics these past couple of months that put a smile on my face, so I want to spread that joy to others. Seriously, they’re so good and I want to shove all these recs at people and have them appreciate them as much as I do. Everyone stay safe and I hope these recs make staying home easier for everyone!

[Fullmetal Alchemist]

maestoso by novalotypo

Edward Elric is about eleven when he stands up, makes an extended effort to knock as many books off the old bastard’s shelves as he can, and says, “Fuck the military. Al, you interested in music at all?”

Everybody's got their own ideas of retirement.

The Elrics don't even do retirement, what with the world trying to blow itself up every other month, but this shit has got to take the fucking cake.

(You want a fic that’ll make you cry tears of uncontrollable laughter? I point you to this fic. The shenanigans, the fact this is a time travel fic, the fucking headaches the Elrics cause, the I-Have-No-Fucks-To-Give attitude. Legend.)

[The Magnus Archives]

we raise it up by savrenim

Jonathan Sims reads a book and saves the world; although maybe the real salvation is the friends he makes along the way.

OR: in which Jon is not the only Archival monster for very long, Sasha James is competent, Tim Stoker finds some catharsis, Helen Richardson is sexy, Melanie makes a very successful youtube channel revamp, and Martin Blackwood gets to brew a lot of new friends tea.

(This is literally the most creative, fucking inspired tma fic I’ve ever read. You literally will never be able to guess what happens next and it’s just so much fun.)(Kinda Time Travel, you’ll understand what I mean if you read it, it’s so well done and amazing.)(The characterization for Sasha makes me want to weep, I’ve never seen her characterized this way before and it makes SO MUCH SENSE.)(@savrenim you are a QUEEN and you inspire me to be a better writer.)

[Marvel]

Crash Landing by Nyxelestia

"You could've left me there," Adrian murmured, jerking his head back towards the burning beach in the distance. "For Stark and his DODC people to find me. Liz and Doris' lives would've actually fallen apart with my arrest, and all my work to take care of them would've gone to waste. You could've just left me there...but you didn't. So I'll make you another deal."

Peter clenched his hands, fists shaking hard. "I'm giving you a second chance - but if you go back to what you were doing...I can't make any promises."

"It would be stupid of me to expect you to, after all this," Adrian said. He looked at Peter, at the hints of bruises and all the blood. He had trouble reconciling this fragile-looking kid with the superhuman who's been destroying his business, his daughter's homecoming date with the boy he'd nearly killed. "That's not my deal. My deal is, we both walk away, and neither of us say a word about any of this to Liz. Anything else - we'll cross those bridges as we come to them."

Swallowing, the boy nodded.

Instead of gift-wrapping the Vulture for Happy to find, Peter lets Mr. Toomes go.

(Honestly, I’m disappointed in the fact there’s not many Vulture-centric fics out there. This was so great and Peter was wonderfully characterized here along with Ned.)(I have a deep craving now for more Adrian Toomes fics and I blame this fic for that. I don’t regret it one bit.)

[The Witcher]

all some children do is work by some_stars

It's two children, he realizes as they slowly sit up. They look about eight or nine, not that he's much judge of children's ages. One is a girl, dark-haired, in a shabby dress. The other is a boy. His clothes aren't much better, and his hair isn't much lighter than the girl's, but his eyes—

His eyes, Jaskier realizes with a distant sense of horror, are gold like a cat's. His mind makes one more valiant effort to keep from connecting the obvious dots and recognizing them, and then it finally does.

"How in the unholy fuck," Jaskier says to no one, "did this shit happen?"

(So sweet it’ll give you cavities. Break your own heart reading this, I dare you.)

of music and motion and love by WriteThroughTheNight

When Jaskier was four, he slipped his mother’s watch and went to the field to gather a bouquet of dandelions. He climbed back into the yard, as stealthy as a child really cared to be, and crept over to the barn. In the barn, lived a secret. (The man he thought his father said the secret was a monster, a plague. His mother said the secret was his sister.)

Jaskier comes from a far humbler background, and would really like to know why Yennefer never came back for her youngest brother.

(YENNEFER AND JASKIER AS SIBLINGS ENOUGH SAID. FIENOWPAFE)

to render it transparent by theundiagnosable

Geralt wakes up warm, peaceful, and utterly content, which is how he knows that something is severely wrong.

(Where Geralt wakes up in the future and Jaskier and Geralt live at the Coast.)(They are Disasters. What else is new.)(Everything’s lovely and emotionally repressed.)

[Game of Thrones]

if I give you my heart, will you promise not to break it? by janie_tangerine

Ship: Brienne/Jaime

“It’s not broken,” she protests.

“Please,” Ronnet goes on, “it’s all red. Red hearts like that are broken and their owners are either useless or more effort than they’re worth. ‘Course you would get a broken one, who else would want you?”

“It’s not,” Brienne hisses, and at that he stops talking. She realizes her voice had turned cold. Very cold. A coldness that doesn’t belong to her, she’s never sounded like that, but it seems to come from the pulsing warmth in her hands, again - “and the day I find him you’ll see he’s not broken or damaged or unworthy. And I sure as the seven hells hope no one got saddled with yours.

in which soulmates find each other through one of them having the other's heart.

or, in which Brienne gets a mostly broken one the day Jaime Lannister kills Aerys Targaryen.

(So this is a series, just want to put that out there. And I read through all of them cause I just couldn’t do otherwise. Brienne is obviously the bravest, most noble, most amazing of course. And Jaime makes me want to punch a wall because feels.)(This soulmate idea is so creatively and well done, has become one of my favorite soulmate tropes.)(There are a lot of interesting pairings in this series and the way the author went about the relationships and this expanding world has me giving all the yeses.)(Please read!!!)

[Gilmore Girls]

Weather Me by missgoalie75

Ship: Paris Geller/Jess Mariano

A year in the life of Paris and Jess.

(PARIS GELLER AND JESS MARIANO AT THEIR VERY BEST HOLY SHIT!!! I can hear their voices in every line, every thought, every damn interaction and I am so in love it's ridiculous. Paris in particular won me over, I have become incredibly fond of her and it's honestly brilliant! And Jess has a beautiful mind and I love him, I do. God, do I.)(missgoalie75 did it again.)

Living With It by thesaltyavocado

Ship: Lindsay Lister/Jess Mariano

#Future Fic, #Post-Season/Series Finale, #So Your Ex is Now Your Step-Cousin, #And You're Dating Her Ex's Ex!, #A Step-by-Step Guide to Getting Over It

(There’s no summary, it’s a series, and I’m in LOVE. I am a sucker for really, really well done rare pairs, and this is the rarest of them all. Go for it. It’s beautiful.)(Also, the author is literally the BEST, the VERY BEST at making me want to ship people I never even thought of. They’re awesome.)(check out all their fics, I went on a spree and you should too.)

[The Hunger Games]

Speechless by thesaltyavocado

Ship: Haymitch Abernathy/Effie Trinket

Effie was kind, she was warm, she offered comfort to anyone who needed it, microphones be damned. She had a reputation for generosity amongst the Victors that Haymitch hadn't paid any attention to, because he was so paranoid about showing his hand that he barely even said her name around other people, barely even acknowledged her existence. Everyone thought he hated her, Beetee had explained. Everyone knew the stories about how he'd made her cry in the sponsor's lounge at the opening of the 61st Games, how he'd blown up at Cecelia that time when she'd asked him to pass a message onto Effie for her. Is that why none of you assholes ever liked me? Haymitch had asked. No, we didn't like you because you were a prick, Beetee told him, which was fair enough.

(The best, and I mean the best fic I’ve ever read regarding this pairing. Nothing is ever going to top this. Nothing.)(The WORLDBUILDING. FUCK.)(Literally everyone is perfectly characterized in new, heartbreaking ways and I just, fuck. Fuck.)(I don’t care if you’re not into the fandom, this will make you fall in love and see the characters with new eyes and it’s absolutely stellar.)(I want to cry.)(You don’t even have to be here for the ship, just be here for the writing, characterization, the WORLDBUILDING, fucking everything.)(Please.)(This fic NEEDS more love.)(I have fallen in love with Effie Trinket.)(This is my life now.)

[Harry Potter]

Walkabout by thesaltyavocado for teethandstars

Ship: Hermione Granger/Sirius Black

"You are always far too handsome for your own good," Hermione says, "in any timeline."

(The author strikes again when it comes to shipping people I don’t expect to love, yet here it is. Such an interesting fic where the time travel already happened and it’s the aftermath that the fic covers.)(Again, characterization off the fucking charts and I just want to wrap myself up in their words and live there.)(A story about broken people trying to find peace within themselves.)

[Stranger Things]

and you hunger for the time by missgoalie75

Ship: Steve Harrington/Kali Prasad

after the battle of starcourt, steve figured the rest of the summer would involve not working, waiting for his busted ribs and face to heal, hanging out with robin and the party, and trying to ignore the panic he feels whenever he thinks about his future. All that does happen, but other unexpected things happen too.

(Bet you didn’t see this ship coming, did you? Neither did I, yet here we are.)(missgoalie75 is the gift that keeps on giving.)(But in all seriousness this is my favorite characterization of Steve, hands down.)(This fic needs more kudos and comments and basically all the love it deserves.)(God tier characterization and relationship development.)

[Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas]

nfwmb by perennial

Ship: Eris/Proteus

The goddess of discord isn't careless enough to fall in love with a do-gooder mortal prince—unless, of course, she doesn't know it's happening.

(Okay, hear me out. I know it’s weird, I can feel the judgement coming from my screen. But I am weak in the face of rare pairings that actually work and the fact I fucking loved this movie ever since I was a kid, okay? So if anybody else loves this fandom as much as I do, stand up and take notice of this. I am here to tell you there are worthwhile fics to be read in this very, very small fandom.)

I'll keep turning down the hands that beckon me to come by deavors

Ship: Marina/Proteus/Sinbad

“Jealous?” Sinbad says, voice easily and casually mocking, but there’s something else under there, an undertone that speaks of so many things Marina isn’t even close to understanding.

“Extremely,” says Proteus, cracking a half-smile, but Marina feels like he’s not joking.

They stare at each other for a few moments. Marina’s gaze flickers between them. Sun and moon. She wishes—she doesn’t know what she wishes. Her heart is twisting again, but in a different way from before: as though it’s half-empty and longs to be full.

(You have no idea how in love I am with the idea of these three being in a poly relationship. No idea.)(I’ve been shipping all of them the moment I was introduced to the idea of polyamory relationships.)(This is THE poly ship for me.)(Nothing’s ever gonna come close. Nothing.)

[Crossovers]

Trust Me, I'm an Alchemist by metisket

Fandoms: Yuri!!! on Ice, Fullmetal Alchemist

In which Yuri Plisetsky began life with the name Edward Elric, and this has made the world of figure skating a significantly stranger and more alarming place.

“Are you saying you lived a life of crime before you began skating?” “I’m gonna have to check the statute of limitations on a couple things and get back to you on that.”

(Meme Alien Edward, Ninja Alphonse who’ll smile at you as you Perish, Disaster Gay Victor, Disaster Gay Maniac Yuuri.)(If this isn’t incentive enough, the Elrics traumatizing and delighting social media with their Life Stories and their Life of Crime.)(Feral Elrics being Feral Elrics.)(It’s the kind of fic that gets better with every chapter, cause the shenanigans just keep ESCALATING.)

#Fanfiction #AO3 #Fic Rec #Fic Rec List #Fullmetal Alchemist #The Magnus Archives #Marvel #The Witcher #Game of Thrones #Gilmore Girls #The Hunger Games #Harry Potter #Stranger Things #Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas #Crossover #Yuuri on Ice #Shipping

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remiwarner · 4 years

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❝𝕴𝖙 𝖇𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖘 𝖆 𝖍𝖔𝖑𝖊 𝖙𝖍𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖌𝖍 𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗𝖞𝖔𝖓𝖊 𝖙𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝖋𝖊𝖊𝖑𝖘 𝖎𝖙.❞

– – a Remi Warner playlist.

1. “Snufs” Kaveh, OnklP / (TRANSLATED)

Long fingernails, on some pimp shit Out to find a fucking nightclub to paint white Tony Montana, don’t think he accepts credit But he’ll happily give you your first hit Yo, come and get a (bump of cocaine)

And she asked me if I was keen on something And the line to the bathroom was fucking long cause all the boys were on some

2. “Day ‘N Nite” Kid Cudi

Slow mo When the tempo slows up and creates that new, new He seems alive though he is feeling blue The sun is shining, man, he’s super cool, cool The lonely nights they fade away He slips into his white Nikes He smokes a clip and then he’s on the way To free his mind in search of

Day and night, the lonely stoner seems to free his mind at night He’s all alone and through the day and night The lonely loner seems to free his mind at night At, at, at night

3. “Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked” Cage The Elephant

Oh, there ain’t no rest for the wicked Money don’t grow on trees I got bills to pay, I got mouths to feed And ain’t nothing in this world for free Oh, no, I can’t slow down, I can’t hold back Though you know I wish I could Oh, no, there ain’t no rest for the wicked Until we close our eyes for good

4. “Cold Wolves” The Gromble

‘Cause there weren’t many times that we shared a bed In the presence of strangers, you’d be sharing with them Needed protection and kept me around But I would always let you down Oh, I can always let you down

Machines keep on working I want to believe But tries are to no avail Some of us were born to fail

5. “Let It Bleed” The Used

This poison’s my intoxication I broke the needle off in my skin Picked the scabs and picked the bleeding And assumed that it was all in vain Pulled at a scab that’s never healing Callused, hit me in the face A burning bridge that’s so misleading Poison’s more potent now with the flame

Let it bleed, take the red for what it’s worth Watch the fire Fill your lungs with smoke for the last time If you feel like dying, you might wanna say

The fire department couldn’t drown the city They didn’t even try to wash it clean And what did you think – that I was sober? Put me out ‘cause I’m on fucking fire I pulled at a scab that’s never healing Regret that I kept this clean The most that I can do for you is keep on lying

6. “Prescription” Mindless Self Indulgence

I’m the doctor, I’m the patient Don’t forget that; it’s important If you love me, like I love me Everybody will be sorry

Well, I don’t need nothing before the show I don’t need nothing, well, that’s not so I need something before the show Just a little something to make me go You know what I want You know what I want Give me more, give me more Pretty please, a prescription Give me more, give me more Pretty please, a prescription

I don’t need no one screwing up my fun Over the counter, fill that prescription I don’t need no one screwing up my fun Turn down the bass and fill that prescription

Make it stop, make it stop Pretty please, a prescription Make it stop, make it stop Pretty please, a prescription

7. “Overdose” Grandson

I couldn’t find the thrill again I couldn’t seem to kill the pain I was living in the moment Searching for a little serotonin But this shit ain’t so fun now I can’t deal with the comedown I’ve been living on the run, now Oh, I gotta get out of this town somehow

‘Cause the bad’s been slowly getting worse In this fast lane, living, it’s a curse Better tell me, what’s your life worth? I think it’s time for a change ‘cause the drugs don’t work Anymore, anymore, anymore

Overdose, overdose, overdose, overdose, overdose All fun and games ‘till I hit the floor, comatose

8. “Little Lion Man” Mumford & Sons

Weep for yourself, my man, you’ll never be what is in your heart Weep, little lion man, you’re not as brave as you were at the start Rate yourself and rake yourself, take all the courage you have left And waste it on fixing all the problems that you made in your own head

But it was not your fault, but mine And it was your heart on the line I really fucked it up this time, didn’t I, my dear?

9. “Dread In My Heart” Mother Mother

There’s a godawful shitty feeling of dread in my heart Yeah, it’s got a lot to do with having to finish what I start And at any second now I think it all might fall apart ‘Cause there’s a godawful shitty feeling of dread in my heart

There’s a devil in my brain with a pitchfork and a flame Yeah, he likes to poke around and he likes to tell me things And whenever I begin to feel like I might be deranged I remember there’s a little shitty devil in my brain

Oh, I wonder what it’s like to be the type who doesn’t burn Yeah, the kind who fights the good fight Not the kind you’d find fisti-fucking-cuffing in the dirt

10. “Heavy Shit” Blake Rose

They tell me ‘why, this is all part of life, you see’ But the world keeps circling around me No, can’t seem to stop beating so hard on myself Hence all the shit I pour out Still haven’t found what I’m looking for No, all of these people keep closing doors They told me ‘you can’t keep holding all this shit to yourself Go find a way to let it pour out’

So here I am, trying to figure where it all went wrong Feel like a ghost in my own damn home Starting to wonder how I got so numb To this heavy shit I pour out Bottoming bottles in the mirror when I’m on my own Feel like I’m lost in my own damn bones Can someone tell me how I got so numb To this heavy shit I pour out?

11. “Discoloration” Dawn Golden

You took my hand and brought me down in the morning And I was sitting waiting for the telephone to swallow me whole I saw your face reflected on the resonant screen And I watched your mouth moving like a tired machine Trying to plead with me Trying to swallow me whole

It’s been a while since I’ve been gone and away And I watched your eyes reflect me in a terrible way As you cast your gaze to the flickering hall

And you knelt beside me and you started to pray And the whites of your eyes blackened with a hardened decay And you talked to me in a broken voice

‘In your open mouth Silence me in your coursing Blood in my eyes Dress me in your clothes And swallow me whole’

12. “Blue And Yellow” The Used

And it’s all in how you mix the two And it starts just where the light exists It’s a feeling that you cannot miss And it burns a hole through everyone that feels it

And you never would’ve thought in the end How amazing it feels just to live again It’s a feeling that you cannot miss And it burns a hole through everyone that feels it

Well, you’re never gonna find it if you’re looking for it Won’t come your way, yeah Well, you’ll never find it if you’re looking for it

Should’ve done something, but I’ve done it enough By the way your hands were shaking Rather waste some time with you Should’ve said something but I’ve said it enough By the way my words were fading Rather waste some time with you

13. “Past Life” Trevor Daniel

I’m trying to be honest with my happiness Don’t know why I’m bad at this And I don’t wanna settle in my sadness I know it’s a habit of mine

Perfect, perfect timing I start what I don’t know how to end Don’t re– don’t remind me I ruined it before it began

Last night was the last night of my past life Got me here like ‘you can never figure me out’ Last night was the last night, was the last time I’ll never let you figure me out Sitting here, talking to myself Thinking how I used to use you, only thing I’m used to Last night was the last night of my past life

14. “Graceless” The National

Graceless Is there a powder to erase this? Is it dissolvable and tasteless? You can’t imagine how I hate this Graceless

I’m trying, but I’m graceless Don’t have the sunny side to face this I am invisible and weightless You can’t imagine how I hate this Graceless

I’m trying, but I’m going through the glass again Just come and find me God loves everybody, don’t remind me I took the medicine and I went missing Just let me hear your voice, just let me listen

All of my thoughts of you Bullets through rotten fruit Come apart at the seams Now I know what dying means I am not my rosy self Left my roses on my shelves Take the wild ones, they’re my favorites It’s the side effects that save us Grace Put the flowers you find in a vase If you’re dead in the mind it’ll brighten the place Don’t let ‘em die on the vine, it’s a waste Grace

There’s a science to walking through windows There’s a science to walking through windows There’s a science to walking through windows There’s a science to walking through windows without you

15. “End Credits” Eden

Cigarette ash like wildfire, burning holes in the nighttime Open scars cut like barbed wire White lies flying high like a ceasefire Dropping flags on the shoreline This is as far as I can feel right ‘Cause what you don’t know can harm you

And all we ever wanted was sunlight and honesty Highlights to wanna repeat Let’s get away from here and live like the movies do I won’t mind when it’s over At least I didn’t think for a while

So let’s run, make a great escape And I’ll be waiting outside for the getaway It doesn’t matter who we are, we’ll keep running through the dark And all we’ll ever need is another day We can slow down, ‘cause tomorrow is a mile away And live like shooting stars ‘Cause a happy ending’s hardest to fake

16. “Bloody Shirt” To Kill A King

What you wanna do tonight? I got wounds to lick in life All you’ve said Standing like a stick, this tie could invert to be a noose instead

Oh, you’re lying next to me Heart is beating heavily Blood in your hair, though, oh, and blood on your shirt

It’s too late to say you’re sorry, say you’re sorry still And I stepped out with heavy heart to bail you out again All those things you do, and all those things you do

Get out, get gone, this town is only gonna get worse Get out, get gone, this town is only gonna eat you

17. “No One’s Here To Sleep” Naughty Boy, Bastille

Every carpet, every floor, everywhere I look, I fall Climbing up the walls, I’m climbing up the walls What goes on behind these doors I’ll keep mine and you keep yours We all have our secrets, we all have our secrets

Behind every door is a fall, a fall And no one’s here to sleep

You were always faster than me I’ll never catch up with you, with you Oh, I can feel them coming for me

Here’s the pride before the fall Oh, your eyes, they show it all I can see it coming, I can see it coming As I rise up through each floor Shit gets dark when you lose it all I can hear it coming, I can hear the drumming

18. “Shots” Imagine Dragons

Am I out of touch, am I out of my place When I keep saying that I’m looking for an empty space? Oh, I’m wishing you’re here But I’m wishing you’re gone I can’t have you, and I’m only gonna do you wrong

Oh, I’m gonna mess this up Oh, this is just my luck Over and over and over again

I’m sorry for everything, oh, everything I’ve done From the second that I was born, I sense I had a loaded gun And then I shot, shot, shot a hole through everything I loved Oh, I shot, shot, shot a hole through every single thing that I loved

Am I out of luck, am I waiting to break When I keep saying that I’m looking for a way to escape? Oh, I’m wishing I had what I’ve taken for granted I can’t have you when I’m only gonna do you wrong

Oh, I’m gonna mess this up Oh, this is just my luck Over and over and over again

19. “Apartment” Young The Giant

After leaving my apartment I feel this cold inside me It howls away all through the market It calls your name

On my way to your apartment I write for fear of silence You carved a boat to sail my shadow Now I walk alone Alright, alright

I hit the sidewalk, and this is how it starts Hide in a raincoat when things are falling apart

After leaving your apartment I hear the coast by nightfall So sure to keep you dreaming You understood Oh, I know you understood Yes, sir, it shows I was no good Alright, alright

I hit the sidewalk, and this is how it starts Hide in a raincoat when things are falling apart ‘Cause sooner or later this is bound to stop Come on, let’s savor What we’re falling over

20. “Munich” Editors

It breaks when you don’t force it It breaks when you don’t try It breaks if you don’t force it It breaks if you don’t try

People are fragile things, you should know by now Be careful what you put them through

People are fragile things, you should know by now You’ll speak when you’re spoken to

With one hand you calmed me With one hand I’m still With one hand you calmed me With one hand I’m still

21. “Tamer Animals” Other Lives

Oh, living for the city And it’s always troubling to keep it in the high lane I don’t care about no scenery And you run from it then Now you can’t escape

‘Cause it’s all you see But we’re all just an end to a simple thing And it’s all you see And it’s all you see

We’re just tamer animals We’re just tamer animals

22. “Silhouette” Jacob Lee

I have tried to quantify the reasons I feel incomplete I guess sometimes my wisdom it figures that’s what I need I have tried to sit beside these demons that trip up my feet I guess sometimes it’s weakness that strengthens the skin on your knees

I’ve not liked myself for quite some time now Standing at the mirror with the lights out Try to keep my shadow at a distance Scared of what it’d say if it could listen

I’ve not known myself for quite some time now Staring at the mirror with the lights out Screaming words that I should probably whisper Terrified the light above might flicker

#soundtrack #( wow even more remi content science is amazing )#( will update this post if i decide to add more songs at some point )#( click through for relevant lyric snippets™ )#( and song list )

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

Text

Survey #302

“heaven ain’t close in a place like this”

What color are your eyes? Grayish blue. What's your favorite type of milk? If we're talking the basics, ig 1% is fine. What would you change about your appearance if you could? Oh, hunny, you got time for an essay? What would you change about your bedroom if you could? I need to fucking finish decorating it... It's not finished by no fault but my own laziness. Are you rich or poor? We're definitely pretty poor. Are you double jointed? I don't think so. What's the most physically painful thing you've ever experienced? I once had a large infected cyst that had to be drained by applying pressure to it, and I swear to Christ I don't know how I didn't faint. They gave me morphine and multiple numbing shots, but none of that did SHIT. I'm not even embarrassed by the fact I was shrieking and sobbing and swearing because I'm pretty fucking sure any sane person would've cried out many times. I'm convinced they either didn't numb me enough for someone of my size back then, or I should've just gone under for it. I have no words for how painful it really was. Do you like shots? Uh, given that nobody LIKES getting a shot with a needle, I'm going to assume you mean like, taking shots of alcohol, in which case I've never tried, but I can almost absolutely guarantee you I'd hate them. I hate the taste of alcohol (hence why I only drink sweet and weak stuff), sooooo, I've got my doubts I'd enjoy something so potent. Are you afraid of spiders? Yes and no? Small ones don't tend to get to me, and I LOVE tarantulas. Big spiders are absolutely fascinating and I love *watching* them, but if I was surprised by a sudden spider, I'm going to probably cry out and jump/scramble away. But on a real note, respect your spiders, whether they scare you or not. They are so important to the ecosystem. See one in the house, take it outside if you can. Have you ever had an allergic reaction to something? To some earrings, yes. I have to wear ones that don't have silver in them. Do you like to read? Yeah, but not nearly as much as I did as a kid. I'm even slacking on WoF lately... Do you know what your purpose in life is? *SLAMS FISTS ON TABLE* BITCH I WISH I KNEW What's something you would like to improve at? Not being a socially anxious catastrophe. Do you believe you have great potential? Everybody does. You just have to use it. What is the most beautiful scenery you have ever beheld? Probably the mountains when driving to Tennessee. Or New York? I really can't recall either so clearly as to have a favorite. Are you flexible? Noooot anymore. Back in my WiiFit days, I was a gotdamn snake. List a song lyric that you like. Oh Jesus, don't make me think. Uhhhhh there's so many. Flipping through artists in my head with lyrics I tend to love, there's Otep with: "hey, hey, NRA, how many kids did you kill today?". Simple, but spine-chilling to me. Huh, time to listen to it actually, lol. That song murders me with the goosebumps. Do you meditate? No; I can't. You can't tell me to "free my mind," man. It's way too hectic at all times up there. What's one place you've been to that you want to visit again? I'd love to go back to Chicago one night when I actually learn how to do nighttime urban photography. What's one place you want to go that you've never visited before? I always answer "South Africa" to questions like this, so for variety's sake, I'll say the Bahamas. But a conspiratory bitch is afraid of the Bermuda Triangle, so... lmao. What's your favorite type of tree? I like big, impressive weeping willows. How many times have you seriously injured yourself? Only two occasions I can think of immediately. Maybe there's more, but idk. Did you attend Sunday School as a child? Yeah, even though I hated it. What is the longest your hair has ever been? Maybe a little passed the small of my back? What about the shortest? (not including being a toddler or baby): How it is now and has been for a couple years: shaved short on the left side, and it transitions to a length near my chin as you go to the right. Have you ever smoked a cigarette? No. Are/were you in the school band, and if so, what instrument did you play? I did, and I played the flute. I'd choose the saxophone if I could go back. Who does the grocery shopping in your household? Well, it's just Mom and me, so her. If you were to donate to charity today, what would you donate to? One that focuses on ovarian cancer for Mom. What is your favorite card game and when was the last time you played it? Even though I was never great at it or knew every single rule, "Magic: The Gathering" is honestly really fun, and I loved looking at the card art. I haven't played it since I was with Jason, so at least five-six years. Would you consider yourself to be good at spelling and grammar? Yeah, but I've somehow gotten worse with time???? I question the spelling and tenses of words I write a lot. What is your favourite seasonal candy? (only available at certain times): Probably like, chocolate rabbits. NOT hollow. Way to break my heart. Or gingerbread cookies. What was the last chocolate bar you ate? I think a Hershey's? It was a while ago. Who was the last person you talked to on Skype/video chat? I was in a Zoom session with multiple people for my partial hospitalization program. Have you ever dreamt about sleeping with someone other than your partner? If so, did that make you feel embarrassed? I've never had a dream like this while in a relationship. The last time you had butterflies in your stomach, what was the reason? I have no idea. Has anyone told you that they miss you recently? No. Has anyone ever asked you out or told you that they liked you, and you rejected them? Can you explain why you didn’t like, or didn’t feel attracted to that person? There was this one guy in the 4th grade who asked me if I would go out with him so much it almost became like a joke. I just... didn't like him like that. Then there's Juan; I'd just been warned that he had a bad rep by a very reliable adult, and the idea of dating him was kinda... intimidating anyway. Plus he was a smoker, which was and still is a no-no for me. What part in a movie would you love to play? The clinically insane villain or something because I feel with my history, I could channel that very well IF I actually wanted to act in the first place. What piece of furniture have you replaced the most? The couch. What’s the best part of your favorite movie? When Simba walks up Pride Rock in the rain and roars and all the lionesses join in. Chilling. What do you think is the most over-rated candy ever? Candy corn is repulsive. What was the highlight of your day? My mom was raving to one of my therapists in the PHP about my art and how badly she wants me to just get everything out there. I was smiling really big but looking down with how shy but also flattered it made me. Do you know anyone who is anorexic? I don't think so. Who has hurt you the most this year? Ha, myself. What's the last insult someone said to you? Hm. How much did your car cost? N/A What is the last picture you received on your phone of? Uhhh Mom mighta sent me a meme or Sara showed me a drawing someone made of Suriza, I think. Have you ever let someone go because you thought they deserved better? No, though I've felt that way before. Is there anybody you're really disappointed in right now? I'm still not over the fact Dad was a druggie before me and my sisters, apparently. It's almost like... hurtful in some weird way? Idk exactly why, it's just something I know I feel. What do you hear right now? I have Motionless In White's cover of "Somebody Told Me" playing in another tab. Do you do anything to help the environment? I do what I can as someone who isn't financially independent and reliant on another person for transportation. I won't litter for anything (and this includes shit like letting balloons go in the air, fucking stop), I'm trying to use my metal straw always in place of plastic, and to use less plastic bags, I try to spread out the times I clean Roman's litterbox to a few days; not to the point it's disgusting or uncomfortable for him, of course, though. Three days without is pretty much max. When's the last time you did something you knew was wrong? Ha, a little while ago... I was trying to avoid eating the two last biscuits Mom made for dinner 'cuz I really gotta lay off the carbs, but Mom "joked" that "it's your birthday, you get to do whatever you want," so I kinda just said fuck it lmao. Do you think that you have a pretty smile? No, because my eyes squint badly, and I also hate my teeth. When's the last time you cried over a guy? A few days ago a little bit, actually. I was reminiscing too much and recalling some of the warmest memories. Are you scared to lose the person you fell the hardest for? I already did. Oh well. Is there someone you wouldn't mind kissing right now? Yep. Do you have any friends that actually model? No. Do you care about the last person you kissed? A fucking lot. Do they care about you? Yes. Is there someone you wish you were with right now? Yes, just because of past birthday memories. I keep hoping a "happy birthday Britt" pops up in my FB messenger, and I hate myself for it. Have you ever imagined how it would feel kissing a certain someone? I legitimately just huffed in humor, guess, lmao. What are the bad things you've heard people say about you? That I'm a martyr, going nowhere, lazy, not trying hard enough, y'know, all that good stuff. Do you flirt a lot? Definitely not. What phrase or saying do you use the most? Probably "oof" lol. What mood are you in right now? I'm doing pretty all right. Kinda dreading Miss Tobey coming over, mean as it is, but I just... don't wanna deal with her and her judgments on my birthday. But I'm looking forward to seeing my sisters, and therapy went very well. Have you ever kissed someone that was high? No. Do you have a good relationship with your mother? Yep. How many exes do you have? I only consider two exes "serious," as I've only been in two deep and long-term relationships, but if we're counting everyone who's had the label of "boyfriend" or "girlfriend," there's six. Do you want to be single or with someone? Ugh, I don't know. It's probably better I don't 'til I figure my shit out, but I really do miss the companionship a lot. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? Because I love her and I was leaving her at the airport. Does your mom think you’re a virgin? She doesn't know for the same reason I don't, really. I think she leans towards I am, but idk. Is there someone that wants you to give them a second chance? I don't know. What size bra do you wear? Uhhh I genuinely don't buy bras enough to know this exactly. C-something. Does the person you last kissed still like you? I don't know if she still like-likes me. Are your parents still together? Noooo. Was your first time good or bad? I dated an Italian, if u kno what I mean. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Which friend-turned-enemy do you miss the most? Colleen, sometimes. Have you ever used an epi pen, and it worked? I have not. What is on your top priority list for today? Make this fuckin' day for me. I'm trying to not let the depression sink in and make me feel worthless on today of all days. So I'm trying to stay in a positive headspace. Do you own any sand art in a jar? Omg, those are so cool! But no. Does the sun come in your window in the morning or at night? Not really; there's houses in the way. What was the last piece of art you created? A drawing of a meerkat with its mouth open angrily, done with colored pencils, against a black background. It's on my second dA. What time of day do you take medications? I have prescription meds for when I wake up and at bedtime. What's your newest hobby you've started? A new hobby? Huh... What are some things you wanted to do that your parents didn't let you do? They wouldn't let us stay home alone until a certain age, we had a timer on the TV at bedtime to shut off after a while, we weren't exposed to certain music or shows, no cursing... stuff like that. What YouTube channels do you recommend? This is a BAD question to ask me, 'cuz I could just about recommend channels for just about any niche. I watch soooooo many. What is your favorite day of the week? Tuesday, because it's reset day in WoW, haha. Meaning, I get to do my stupid mount farming raids again for the week. Blackhand, gimme your FUCKING clefthoof already. Ballet or cheerleading? Ballet is beautiful. What are your favorite sports to watch? Only dancing, really. Were you ever in the marching band? No. Which holiday has the best decorations, in your opinion? My contrasting aesthetics make this hard, haha. I love Christmas with all the beautiful light displays people can make, but let's not sleep on Halloween, y'all. I loooove Halloween decor, like c'mon, that's where I get shit for my room year-round, lmao. What do you want to be known for? It'd actually be kinda cool if I built up some sort of rep in the vulture culture community with my photography of roadkill. For how few shots I actually have on there and minimal interaction, my Instagram for it is doing quite well, if you consider those factors. They've gotten some pretty decent attention on dA, too. I would love for people to know why I do it though, of course: awareness and respect for the animal's life. How often do you wear make-up? Almost never nowadays. Think of the person you are jealous of...what are you jealous of them for? She's actually making a career out of her photography. Do you have art that you made in high school? Oh, plenty. Do you have trauma in your past? *clears throat* take a fuckin seat Favorite type of frosting? Chocolate. Have you ever tried cake decorating? No. One of my sisters is actually one, though! She's great at it. What clubs are you a part of? None. What was your favorite book that you had to read for school? The Outsiders. 6th grade, to be exact. Do you like to read classics, or do you usually read new arrivals? I don't prefer one over the other, honestly. Were you a big partier in college? No, I never partied. Is your college one you would recommend? My most recent one, fuck yes. They're amazing and care so deeply for their students. Would you go camping in the woods alone? Yikes, no. Would you name your kids after anyone? If I had a son and I had my way with the name, he would be named after the Most Selfless Man in the World, Damien from WKM. :'''''( Do you have any supernatural gifts? No. Are there any good churches in your town? You're asking someone who has a bad relationship with religion. Do you want an indoor or outdoor wedding? It really depends on the season and venue my spouse and I pick. Do you think you would be a good salesperson? HEEEEEEEEEEEELL NAW fam. I ain't pressuring people to buy shit.

#survey #surveys #questions #questionnaire #lyrics: ''somebody told me'' by motionless in white

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calpalirwin · 4 years

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When I Pray For You

Summary: Ashton Irwin had only planned on performing and enjoying his New Year’s Eve rocking out to 80s music. He never planned on the woman in the black dress shaking up his world. What a way to rock in the new decade.

A/N: So this was originally a one-shot piece designed to satisfy my widest daydreams after actually meeting Ashton Irwin at a New Year’s Eve party. And now it’s a 3-part series. Catch up here with Part 1 and Part 2.

Content: Pregnancy. Cursing. General shenanigans.

Word Count: 7.5K

And away, and away we go!

~~~

“So, who are we gonna pick to be the godfather?” I asked her, once the shock wore off and we were curled up in bed.

“All 3 of them,” Bridget said simply.

“All 3 of them for 1 kid?” I giggled. “Oh, they’re gonna be so spoiled…” I continued to giggle with a small groan.

“You didn’t really look at the picture did you?” she asked.

“No,” I said sheepishly. I had been too excited to realize anything about it besides it being a sonogram.

“Probably for the best.”

“Why? What’s going on?”

“Look closer at the picture, Ash.”

I scrambled to reach for where I had placed it on the bedside table. I squinted, then my eyes shot wide open as I took in the small “A”, “B”, and “C”. “Oh, fuck…” I breathed, clapping a hand to my mouth. “OH, FUCK!”

“More than you bargained for?” she laughed.

“TRIPLETS!” I was on my feet, tears streaming down my face.

“Ash, you’re yelling.”

“HOLY FUCK!” I was spinning in circles, my mind racing, my vision blurry. A year ago I was just a dude who liked a gorgeous girl in a dazzling dress. Now she was going to be my wife and she was carrying not one of my kids, not two, but three! Three babies! Three… babies...

“Ash? ASHTON!”

~~~

“Hey, there you are,” her voice said softly as I opened my eyes.

“What the fuck?” I mumbled, wondering why I was on the bedroom floor. “Did you kick me out of bed?”

She laughed. “Yeah, like I’m strong enough to do that.”

“Triplets, huh?” I asked, it all coming back to me as I stood up.

“Whoa, easy there,” she said, gripping my arms to help keep me steady.

“We’re gonna be outnumbered, baby…” I realized, sitting back down on the bed.

“I know. Good thing we got 3 godfathers on hold.”

“So, they each get one?”

“Yeah. Figured we could name them after them? Sort of anyone. Like initial wise. I want Irish names, though.”

I smiled at her. God, she was perfect, wasn’t she? “Wait, you said you were due in May. Do you know the genders already?”

She nodded, biting her lip. “Well, Sierra knows. And Crystal. They’re planning the reveal party.”

“So, Luke and Mike also know?”

“Nope. The guys don’t know a thing. There are small benefits to you guys being off on tour. Easier to keep things a secret.”

“God, how are you not showing?”

“Oh, I am,” she said with a roll of her eyes.

“You’re still beautiful.” Then, “Wait, you said ‘Baby Irwin’, not ‘Irwins’.”

“I know.”

I quirked an eyebrow at her.

She laughed. “I wasn’t sure if you had noticed much besides that it was a sonogram. I didn’t want you to faint on me in public.”

“Good call,” I giggled weakly.

“You good?” she asked, snuggling up next to me, her brown eyes still holding a trace of worry.

I held her tight against me, pressing a kiss to her hair, “So good. You?”

“I’ve had about four months to get used to the idea, Ash. Yeah, I’m good.”

“Fuck!” I groaned, tears forming in my eyes, this time not with joy.

“What?”

“I’ve missed four months…” I said with a choked sob. Then, I was weeping.

“Ash,” her voice soothed, her arms holding me tight. “It’s okay, Ash. We’re okay.”

“I’m already the worst father!” I wailed, sounding like a broken boy, not a father and husband to me. Not at all a man that deserved her.

Suddenly her lips were on my arms, leaving those soothing kisses I’d come to desire so much when my mind went dark. And just like that, she was pulling me out of the pit, loving the unlovable. “There you are,” she smiled when my breathing became regular.

“Sorry,” I sniffed, wiping at my face, beyond embarrassed.

“Listen to the good voice,” she reminded me. “The one that tells you that you are going to be an amazing father because you are beautiful and strong and wild and caring.”

“That voice sounds a lot like you.”

“Good. Listen to it. I have a tendency of being right.”

~~~

“Wait what?” Calum blinked, the only calm one out of the trio when we told the band. Luke was sobbing in his hands. Mike was running laps around the house screaming.

“She’s having 3 babies, dumbass,” Sierra said with an eye roll, rubbing Luke’s back soothingly. “It’s okay, Lu.”

“I’m just so happy!” the tall blonde man smiled, wiping at his face and pulling it together.

“I call dibs on godfather!” Mike screamed, finally coming to a halt.

“You each get to be a godfather,” Bridget told him happily. “That’s the joy of having triplets, Mike. Nobody gets to be left out.”

He crossed his arms, green eyes narrowed. “Fine. I guess that’s fair. Hey, Crys?”

“Whoa…” Crystal said, holding up a hand. “3 babies in 1 year is enough, Clifford.”

“What? No. I want an engagement ring like Ash.”

“Oh, thank God!” Crystal laughed in relief. “No offense, babes,” she said to Bridget.

“None taken,” Bridget said back with a grimace. “Quit kicking each other!” she growled at her stomach.

“They’re moving?!” we all asked, rushing to touch her stomach.

“They need to stop!” Bridget said, shooing all the hands away except mine.

“What are they?” Mike asked.

“Normally I’d lecture you on how gender is a social construct,” Bridget told him, “But Si, get the cupcakes. Or help me to my feet. No, just bring me the cupcakes.”

“Are you tired, baby?” I asked her, pulling her feet into my lap.

“I’m a lot of things, Ash,” she chuckled wryly.

“A pregnancy reveal, and a gender reveal?” Luke said, teary-eyed again.

Don’t you dare start crying again, Luke. Because then I will,” Bridget threatened him.

“Alright, here you guys go,” Sierra said, bringing out a small box of cupcakes.

“Everybody filming?” I checked, opening the box while 5 phones turned in our direction.

“Whoa, just one of you,” Bridget said, waving her hands. “We don’t need the 5 voiceovers. Crystal, you record.”

“Irwin triplet gender reveal, here we go!” Crystal’s voice announced.

I held one of the cupcakes close to Bridget’s mouth so we could both bite into it, revealing the blue frosting inside. “Boy!” we all cheered.

“Dibs!” Calum decided, taking the cupcake from us. “Godfather to the boy!” Calum sneered playfully at Luke and Mike, shoving the rest of the cupcake in his mouth.

“My turn!” Mike said.

“Ready, baby?” I asked, holding up the second cupcake.

She pecked at my lips. “Ready.”

“Girl!” we cheered around our bites, handing the pink-filled cupcake to Mike.

“Whoohoo!” Mike whooped, swallowing the cupcake in one bite.

“Final one,” I said, waving the last cupcake for Crystal’s benefit.

“Alright, Luke, ready to find out what your godkid is?” Bridget grinned, her tongue blue, pink frosting smeared by her lips.

Luke was practically vibrating with excitement for his turn.

“Here goes nothing,” Bridget shrugged, as we bite into the last cupcake, pink frosting coating our faces. “Girl! You’re outnumbered, Ash!” Bridget cheered, a wild grin on her face.

“Protect you sisters, Bubba,” I whispered, rubbing my hands over her stomach.

“They can protect themselves,” Bridget told me sternly, handing Luke the cupcake.

~~~

“Oh, my God…” I grumbled, placing my phone face down on the coffee table.

“What’s wrong?” she asked me, half asleep in my arms as we laid together on the couch.

“Nothing. The video Crys posted,” I sighed, pushing my hair back.

“What about it? People like it, don’t they?”

I rubbed at my eyes in frustration. A year later and she still wasn’t fazed. She grinned every time she got a new follower, excitedly waving her phone at me. She waved at the paparazzi and asked how they were. “They do. And they don’t. Just the same old bullshit.”

She frowned. “You know I don’t really pay much attention to what they say. We know the truth. Fuck what everyone else thinks.”

“I know.”

“You’re angry,” she said, putting her hands on my face. “What are they saying?”

I shook my head. “I don’t want to upset you.”

Her frown deepened. “Ash…”

I smiled a little and pushed her lips up. “Stop that,” I scolded lightly.

“That’s my thing,” she said, smiling anyway. “What did they say?”

“Just assumptions that I asked you to marry me because you were pregnant. How it’s not very ‘Christian’ of me,” I said, leaving out the worst assumptions- that she had either cheated and was trapping me, or that she had gotten pregnant on purpose, again to trap me.

She laughed. “God, that’s such utter bullshit. People really will shit on other people’s happiness, huh? Wow…”

“Sometimes people just suck,” I shrugged, still angry at the hate people were giving her.

She frowned again. “Uh-oh… you’re not mad about what they’re saying about you, are you? Which means…” she stopped, her mind putting the pieces together. “Those assholes…” she muttered, angry tears in her eyes.

“Shh, baby, it’s fine. We know the truth,” I soothed, my hands rubbing up and down her back as her anger made her break down.

“That is such BULLSHIT!” she cried into my shirt. “We planned this! These babies are planned! We’re getting married because we want to!”

“Shh, it’s okay,” I continued to soothe, letting her give voice to both our anger.

“This is bullshit, Ash!”

“I know.”

“People fuckin suck…” she mumbled, her exhaustion overriding her anger.

“Do you want me to address the comments? Or just leave it be?”

“Address it please…” she mumbled against me.

I reached for my phone, clicking it open and going live, not caring how much hell I’d catch for this with management. This was my personal life people were going after. They had made the mother of my children- my future wife- cry. I was pissed. But I needed to stay calm, for her sake, and maybe for my own. “Hey, guys. Ashton here. So, as some of you know, Bridget and I are expecting triplets. As some of you also know, we’re engaged. And I just wanted to take this moment to clarify a few things. So, Bridget and I decided we wanted to have kids together while I was still in Europe last summer for No Shame. It was a decision we made together. We weren’t expecting for her to get pregnant as quickly as she did. We knew this was something that takes time. But regardless of how short it took us, or how long it could have taken, the fact remains the same: we’re beyond excited to be parents together. We were, and are ready for this. Now, as far as the proposal goes, I actually bought those rings the day after we announced publicly that we were together last March.”

“You did?” her voice asked, her head lifting up.

“Course I did. I love you, baby,” I said, kissing her softly.

“I love you too,” she smiled, tears in her eyes.

“Good tears?”

“Very good.”

“Good. Cuz 5 minutes she was angry crying that some of you were saying… well frankly some rude shit,” I told the camera and her face hid back in my chest. “Anyway. I had the rings about 2 months before we decided to have kids. And when I proposed last week- because I kept stupidly waiting for the right moment, even though every moment with her is the right moment,” I paused to chuckle as she hiccup happy sobbed into my chest. “I didn’t know she was pregnant. I proposed because I love her and want to spend my life with her, preferably as her husband. The pregnancy and proposal have nothing to do with each other besides the fact that they were both going to happen eventually. In conclusion, yes, we’re excited to be outnumbered by our triplets. And yes, that’s ours as in hers and mine. Yes, we’re excited to be engaged and start planning our wedding. Yes, our heads are spinning. No, we don’t think it’s too fast. We both believe life is too short to not chase after what- or in this case who- you love. And as for the Christian aspect of it? God loves me because he has blessed me with an amazing woman who is carrying not one, not two, but three of my children like the unbelievable badass she is. I think He’s got bigger things to worry about than two people who actually love each other having babies out of wedlock. To those of you who have expressed your happiness, love, and support to my growing family, we love and thank you. To the rest of you? Well, this is the truth straight from the source. Anything you wanna add, baby?” I asked, glancing down to find her asleep on my chest. “Oh,” I said to the camera, my voice dropping to a whisper. “My badass superhero of a woman is asleep. Love you all, bye!”

~~~

“I pray you love like your momma,” her voice sang softly from the couch. I paused in my entrance, listening to her sing to our babies, her hands moving across her stomach. God, she was beautiful.

“Which song is that?” I said, coming over to kiss her.

“Oh!” she said, her cheeks flushing, her hand scrambling to stop the music. “Nothing, just a song I like to sing to them sometimes.”

“Country, huh?” I asked, quirking an eyebrow. Any time I caught her singing and asked what it was, I always got the “just a song I like to sing sometimes,” response, like she was embarrassed to admit that she liked other genres of music. I grabbed her phone, taking note of the song title.

She shrugged. “I like it.”

“I know you do.”

Her blush deepened. “Oh, I was thinking of names now that we know the genders.”

“Oh?” I asked, perking up and moving to sit next to her, helping her adjust against me.

“Yeah. Connor Theodore, Logan Rose, and Monroe Grace.”

“That sounds perfect, baby,” I smiled at her.

When she drifted off to sleep, something she took full advantage of on her days off because the pregnancy often left her exhausted, I set out to work. I listened to the song she had been singing, choking back the tears and picking softly at the guitar strings, determined to learn it as fast as possible.

“Ash!” her voice called out, drawing me from my thoughts. “I need help!”

I chuckled, setting the guitar aside and made my way downstairs. “Are you stuck? I asked her, giggling as she tried to roll herself to her feet.

“I am 6 months pregnant with 3 of your children,” she growled, her brown eyes hard. “Help me off this damn couch, or so help me God, I will end you where you stand.”

I giggled despite her threat. “C’mon, you,” I said, giving her my hands and pulled her up with ease. Pregnancy or not, she was still as light as a feather.

“I hate how easy that is for you,” she grumbled, staring up at me.

“How easy what is? This?” I asked, bending to wrap an arm under her knees and scooping her into my arms.

“I don't know whether to cry because of my anger or your thoughtfulness,” she mumbled, her hands gripping my shirt.

“How about neither, and I rub your feet?” I suggested.

“And my back?” she sniffed anyway.

“Whatever you want, baby.”

~~~

“Aw, look at these,” she said with a small laugh, moving her laptop so I could look at the pictures.

“You look beautiful,” I agreed, admiring the picture of her in the flowing dress, picturing her in a different one.

“I look 7 months pregnant,” she said with an eye roll. “You, on the other, look hot. As per usual.”

I chuckled, heat rising to my cheeks.

“Seriously. It’s really not fair how hot you are. Like, look at this shit,” she said, finger pointing at a picture where I was behind her, my hands cradling her stomach, her head tilted up, her eyes closed, a small on both our faces as I kissed her head. “You, sir, walk a fine line between sweet and sexy, and you look damn good doing it.”

“I could say the same thing about you.”

“You could. But you’d be wrong.”

“I also have a tendency of being right,” I smirked, kissing her deeply.

~~~

“Ash!” she said, shaking me awake. “Ash, wake up!”

“What?” I asked, sleepily, rubbing my eyes. “What’s going on?”

“Something’s wrong!” she said, her voice laced with panic.

Suddenly I was wide awake, jumping out of bed and pulling her to her feet. “What’s wrong? What’s going on? It’s too early for labor, isn’t it? Your due date isn’t for another 6 weeks,” I rushed, the words flying out in a panic.

“I know!” she cried, fear written all over her face. “Ash, I’m scared!”

“It’s gonna be okay, baby,” I promised, swallowing my own fear. This had to be okay. It had to.

Everything was a messy blur of tears and whispered promises as I felt my world crumbling around me. It felt like I was watching somebody that looked like me scream at the nurse manning the front desk that something was wrong, then watching as they wheeled her into a room. My weight finally gave and I sank to the ground, sobbing into my hands. Please God, let them be okay, I begged silently.

“Ash? ASHTON!” Calum’s voice called into the fog I was trapped in, and then three pairs of arms were pulling me to my feet, a cup of water pushed into my hands. I couldn’t even remember when or who they had called them. I couldn’t remember anything beyond the sheer terror on her face. The sheer terror of a mother scared for her children. “Easy, mate. We got ya,” Calum said and then I was sitting down. “What happened?”

“I- I dunno…” my voice sounded and everything snapped into focus, the dull ringing and fog finally fading out. “She woke me up. She said something was wrong. And now I’m here.”

“She’s in room 304,” Crystal said and I took in all their faces. Faces that conveyed no emotion except for the storm of panic and worry swirling in their eyes. They were holding it together, like Bridget needed them to. Like I needed to do myself.

I nodded at her words, hastily wiping at my face and downing the small paper cup of water. “Will you guys stay?” I asked, standing up.

“We’re right here, mate,” Calum assured me and they all nodded. “Go be with her. She needs you.”

“Hey, there you are,” her voice said softly, holding out a hand to me when I found myself in the doorway of the hospital room.

I choked back a sob of relief and quickly moved to her. “I’m here, baby. I’m not going anywhere,” I promised, placing kissed in her hair.

“Good, because I was really scared.”

“Did they tell you what was going on?”

She nodded. “But, I- I wasn’t really paying attention. Everything was happening so fast, and I- I’m sorry.”

“Shh,” I soothed, catching the tear that slid down her cheek. “It’s alright. You’re safe. That’s what matters.”

“We’re safe,” she corrected, her hands grazing her stomach. “I paid attention to that much.”

“Oh, thank God,” I sighed with relief, feeling the weight lift from my chest.

~~~

“Ugh this sucks!” she screamed in frustration, chucking the remote. She had been on bed rest for a week and was going stir-crazy.

“Well, the baby shower’s later today,” I told her, trying to keep her mind off the fact that she wasn’t allowed to be on her feet for more than an hour every day.

“Well, the baby shower’s later today,” she mocked, angrily.

I let out my breath in a small huff. I knew she was a storm of emotions, but it didn’t make her lashing out at me any easier to take. “I’m gonna go clean up downstairs so the girls have an easier time setting up,” I told her. “Call if you need anything.”

“Wait!” she said, and I stopped in the doorway, turning to look at her tear-stained cheeks. “I’m sorry!”

I smiled softly and moved back across the room, crawling into bed beside her. “It’s okay,” I told her, holding her in my arms. “I know you don’t mean it.”

“It’s not okay! I’m being a bitch!”

I chuckled and held her tighter. “Do you want your baby shower present from me now?”

“You got me a present?”

“Well… sort of…” I said, rubbing at the back of my neck.

“Well, what is it?” she asked, getting excited.

“Sit tight, I’ll be right back,” I said, patting her leg and getting up.

“Ha-ha, really funny, Irwin. Sit tight? Like where the fuck am I gonna go? Mars?”

I chuckled as she ranted, running down the hall to fetch my guitar- reliving briefly the way she had looked back in May when she asked to play it for the first time. “Ready?” I asked, once I was back, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

“Oh, you’re gonna make me cry? That’s my present? Awesome…”

I gave a small shake of my head and started playing. “I talk to God about you, and I ain’t even met you yet. Everybody’s waiting on you here. I can’t wait to feel your heart beat when I lay you on my chest. I’m already holding back my tears. I wanna be better than my dad was. I hope that I don’t mess this whole thing up,” I sang, altering the lyrics just the slightest.

“Oh, Ash…” she breathed, tears spilling down her face before her voice joined me, both of us gently singing our way through the song. “You really taught yourself to play that?” she asked, wiping at her eyes.

I nodded. “Course I did. You sing it all the time to them. I wanted to be able to do the same.”

“I fuckin love you, Ashton Irwin.”

“I love you too, Bridget Irwin.”

“I’m not your wife yet, mister.”

“We can fix that.”

She laughed. “Let me have these babies, and get back into shape first.”

“Why? You’re already beautiful.”

“Ash, I’m literally not allowed on my feet. I don’t even have a dress.”

“Alright, fine. But, I’m gonna make you my wife, sooner rather than later.”

“You better.”

I sang that song again to her before bed, after she kissed my scars. “Is this part of the ritual now?” I joked. “You kiss my scars, I sing you and them to sleep?”

“You bet your ass it is.”

I grinned, more than happy to comply.

~~~

“Ash!” her voice called from down the hall.

“Be right t- ow! Fuck!” I grumbled, smacking my head on the frame of the crib the guys were helping me assemble. With the baby shower over and done with, we were now getting changing the guest room into a nursery.

“Easy mate,” Calum said, as they all snickered at me.

“Fuck you,” I laughed, dashing out the room and down the hallway. “Whatcha need, baby?”

“Hospital!” she screamed, curled up in the fetal position on the bed. “Ow, ow, OW! STOP THAT!”

“Contractions?” I asked. We still had 3 weeks left until her due date.

“YES! And Connor won’t stop kicking!”

“How do you know it’s Connor?” I giggled, rushing over to help her up.

“The one with the wicked kicks would be Cal’s godkid,” she glared at me.

I shrugged. “Could be Monroe. Kicking you while you’re down? Sounds a lot like what a wild child would do.”

“Sounds like you should respectfully shut the fuck up! Hospital! Now! Please!”

“Up we go,” I said, scooping her up. “Guys, it’s showtime!” I called out as I carried her down the hall and downstairs, hearing the mad scrambling in the bedroom. “Mike, grab her bag. Luke, call everybody. Cal, c’mon, you’re driving us.”

“Ow, ow, OW!”

“Keep breathing, baby. You got this. I’m right here.”

“Ash! I’m not ready!” she told her, her voice panicked.

“Look at me,” I urged. “You can do this. You’re going to be amazing. I’ll be right here with you.”

“No fainting,” she told me.

“No fainting,” I promised.

~~~

“Aw, look at my gorgeous girls,” I smiled softly, watching her hold both Logan and Monroe in her arms.

“Aw, my beautiful boys,” she smiled back at me as I held Connor close.

“Let me know when you get tired,” I told her, seeing the exhaustion on her face.

“But…” she pouted.

“You need to rest,” I said, putting Connor down and coming to get the girls.

“No,” she softly whined. “I wanna hold them forever.”

I chuckled and placed a kiss to her forehead. “I know, baby. I know.”

“God, I could stare at them for hours, you know?” she said, looking longingly at the three bassinets as I set the girls down.

I looked down at the three of them, nodding. I knew exactly what she meant. I would never get tired of this view.

“Knock, knock,” Calum’s voice said, knuckles rapping against the door, Luke and Mike on his heels. “Up for visitors?”

“C’mon in guys,” Bridget smiled, beckoning them. “Did the girls go home?”

“Yeah, they’re making the nursery nice now that we got everything built,” Luke said.

“Thanks guys,” I answered. “Go wash up, and I’ll introduce you to the babies.”

“Oh, they’re so small,” Mike said, his normally loud voice a hushed whisper. “Who’s who?”

“Cal, this is Connor Theodore,” I said, placing the blue bundle in Calum’s waiting arms.

“What’s up, Theo? I’m Uncle Cal,” Calum cooed.

“Luke, this is Logan Rose,” I said, handing Luke the yellow bundle.

“Oh, hey there Lo-Ro,” he grinned.

“And Mike, this is Monroe Grace,” I finished, handing Mike the pink bundle.

“Aw, your pink like my hair used to be Mo-town. Your dad knows us so well.”

“Watch, Theo, Uncle Mikey’s gonna tell your sister how he’s punk rock,” Calum teased.

“I am punk rock, Mo-town, and I’m gonna teach you how to be punk rock, too.”

~~~

“Fuck!” she cursed, her eyelids flying open.

“What?” I asked, instinctively lifting my arm for her to curl up on my chest. “The babies are fine, go back to sleep.”

“No, it’s not the babies,” she said, her hands fluttering in a panic. “God, I’m the worst…”

“What’s wrong?” I chuckled.

“I didn’t kiss you,” she whispered, horrified. “My mind is all over the place lately, and I’m so tired, and I… I can’t believe I forgot. I never forget.”

“Oh,” I said, understanding. Then, “It’s okay, baby. We did the song.”

“No it’s not okay. Give me your arms.”

“Baby, you’re tired. I’m tired. We’re all tired.”

“Give me your arms, Irwin.”

I chuckled again and let her tug my wrists to her lips. “Never forget that I love you. Past, present, future. Every part,” she murmured against my skin.

“Only if you promise to remember the same. Our life together? It’s everything I’ve ever prayed for.”

“Me too,” she smiled up at me and my heart raced. “All those times I prayed for some sort of purpose, some sort of joy to override the pain, it was really you. I was praying for you and this life we’ve built and are continuing to build all my life, and I never even knew it.”

“I love you,” I said, even though those three words were far too simple to ever express how I truly felt towards the woman in my arms.

“I love you, too,” she said with that smile of hers, and I knew she felt what I couldn’t say. That overwhelming, whirlwind, pure fairytale magic that is finding your soulmate. That sense of knowing that every bad day is made better by looking into their eyes, that your best memories will be the ones you make with them. I had gone eight years thinking that the closest I would get to soulmates were my brothers, and I had never been so happy to have been so wrong. She was the piece I never knew I was missing. She was the answer to the prayer I never knew I was praying.

~~~

“Fuck…” I muttered, packing my bags reluctantly.

“What?” she asked.

“I don’t want to go. I’ve always been excited to tour. But this time? I just… fuck!”

She chuckled. “It’s only the summer, Ash.”

“I know, but I don’t want to leave you guys.”

“What if I told you that you didn’t?”

“What?!” I asked, my eyes going wide. “But, I thought…”

“Well, they had their checkup, and they’re doing well. So, I asked. Figured worse Dr. Robbins could say was “no.”

“And she said yes?!”

She nodded. “Since it’s the States, she didn’t see the harm.”

“This is great!” I cheered, packing with more excitement now.

“This is gonna be the most hectic summer vacation I’ve ever had,” she giggled.

“It’s gonna be the best summer vacation we’ve ever had,” I corrected.

“Is it a vacation if you’ll technically be working?”

“Every day with you is a vacation.”

She laughed. “That just might be the cheesiest thing you’ve ever said. And you’re gonna eat those words, Ash. A tour with three two-month olds? Oh, boy, what are we doing?”

“Taking our first family vacation?”

~~~

“No, put it back,” Bridget said, her voice stern, not even looking at whatever Mike had in his hands for his goddaughter. It had become a problem, the men spoiling their godkid as an attempt to prove who was the better godfather. A lousy competition that had no real winner. But it meant Bridget and I hadn’t really had to buy much for the triplets ourselves, so I wasn’t complaining. Even if my house was bursting at the seams with their generosity war.

“C’mon! Babies first tour!” Mike pouted.

“Hey, if he gets to buy something for Monroe, we get to buy stuff, too,” Luke said, crossing his arms, enacting the rule Bridget had put in place when tour started. All purchases for the triplets had to be approved, given that space was limited. Clothes, plushies, and necessities like diapers were the only things being approved thus far, and sparingly so.

“Nobody is buying any of these babies anything,” Bridget said, fighting to keep her voice down in the store because the triplets were asleep in the stroller and hell hath no fury like 3 screaming babies. “We came for ear plugs and diapers. Not clothes and toys.”

“But...” Calum started, holding up a pair of baby Vans that matched the ones on his feet.

“Connor doesn’t even walk!” she hissed.

“But he will!”

“Oh, if Cal’s buying Connor Vans, can I get Lo-Ro these pair of boots?” Luke asked, his blue eyes wide, lower lip jutting down.

“They don’t walk, Lucas!” She stood toe-to-toe with the man who had over a foot in height over her, her brown eyes hard behind her glasses. “Mikey, Monroe hardly has any hair to dye, dude,” she added, still staring the taller blonde down.

“I’m behind you. How did y- How did sh- WITCHCRAFT!” Mike yelled.

The triplets started screaming. Bridget rolled her eyes, glasses pushing up as she pinched the bridge of her nose. A sigh escaped her lips as she bent down over the stroller. “Here,” she said, passing a screaming three month old to the rightful godfather. “You caused this. You soothe. And you!” she said, wheeling around to face me, her index finger poised to stab at my chest.

I held up my hands and took a step back. “What did I do?!”

Her eyes narrowed. “You could be helping.”

“I got the diapers,” I said, holding up the package as proof.

“Thank you,” she said graciously despite the stress etched upon her face as the men struggled to soothe the babies. It seemed like she was constantly stressed these days. I didn’t blame her. First time parenthood to one kid was stressful, but three? Even with the help, it was hard. “Guys really? Rock, sing. Come on, help a woman out. Soothe your godkid, and you can buy them one thing, okay? But only one.”

“Loser gets diaper duty?” Calum grinned.

“You’re on!” the blondes grinned back.

“Oh, I like this idea,” Bridget said in a hushed voice, lifting my arm and placing it over her shoulders as she leaned into me. “Should’ve done this way sooner.”

“You okay?” I asked.

“I’m just tired.”

“I know, baby. I’ll get the guys on baby duty tonight, and we can do something just us, okay?”

“That sounds wonderful, but you know I’m gonna miss my babies, Ash.”

“I know. You’re a great mom, you know that?”

“You’re a great dad. I love you.”

“I love you, too, baby.”

~~~

“Do you, Ashton, take Bridget to be your wife?”

“I do,” I smiled at her, looking fucking radiant in that white dress like I’ve been imaging her in since we met. I took her hand and flipped her Claddagh ring around.

“Bridget, do y-“

“Yes!” she interrupted, giggling, her fingers quickly fixing my own ring.

“I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride in 3… 2… HAPPY NEW YEAR!”

I kissed her. She kissed back. It was time-stopping and earth-shattering. “Happy New Year, my wonderful wife,” I said, my cheeks sore from my smile.

“Happy New Year, my handsome husband,” she smiled back.

“I can buy you a real wedding band if you want,” I told her, taking her left hand in mine. “Or a real engagement ring. Whatever you want.”

She shook her head. “I don’t need fancy. I just need you and our babies.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Then, she giggled. “We really need to stop one-upping this holiday every year. I think we used all the good ideas.”

I shook my head. “Never. I love our tradition of starting a new year in a new way together.”

“You know, Christmas has always been my favorite holiday. But I think it just got bumped to second place.”

“Funny, I was thinking the same thing.”

~~~

“Hey Ash?” she asked me after we got the triplets in bed after an exhausting birthday party for our now three year olds. Just where the hell did the time go?

“Yeah?” I asked, collapsing beside her on the bed.

“We need a bigger house.”

“Why? The girls are fine sharing a room, and they guys and I finished cleaning out the music room for Connor.” It wasn’t that we couldn’t afford another house, I just wasn’t one of those types who needed to live extravagantly. I had bought my 3-bedroom home when I moved to LA with the purpose of raising a family one day. 3 bedrooms was more than enough for us.

“Ash,” she said, handing me a wad of toilet paper. “We need a bigger house.”

“What’s this?” I asked, my eyes wide.

“The third test I’ve taken today. The proof that we’re gonna need a bigger house.”

“You’re pregnant?!”

“Yep. And I know, we haven’t talked about it. I thought I was fine with the triplets. But, they’re getting so big. And, then this just happened. Surprise?”

“This is great!” I cheered, pulling her into a hug.

“Really?”

“Yes! Triplets on the first go-round was a little more than I bargained for, so I wasn’t sure if you wanted more. But, God, baby, I’ll have as many kids with you as you want. I love watching you be a mom.”

“I love watching you be a dad,” she smiled up at me. “But, seriously. We need a bigger house.”

“I’ll call the realtor in the morning,” I promised.

“Whoa, I was half-joking,” she laughed. “It could be one, and if it’s a boy, we can just stick him with Connor.”

“Yeah, but-”

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence. I will be happy regardless, but just don’t.”

~~~

“Congratulations, looks like triplets again,” the doctor smiled.

“You’re not gonna faint on me, are you?” Bridget asked me, her voice teasing.

“Nah, I’m good,” I managed to get out through the lump in my throat, my eyes glued to the three blobs on the small screen.

“Ash, stop,” she said, her fingers soft on my arm. “You’re spiraling.”

“I never want to miss another moment,” my voice whispered, feeling all the hurt from missing the first half of her first pregnancy bubbling up inside of me.

“Look at me, Ash,” she coaxed, using the same soft tone she used with the triplets to get them to calm down. When my hazel eyes met her brown ones, she smiled. “You’re being too hard on yourself. You are the best damn man in the world, alright? You love your family and we love you right back.”

“But, I-” I protested.

“Shh, listen to the good voice.”

I nodded, closing my eyes and taking a few slow breaths to steady myself, listening to the voice in my head that was her. It was always her.

“Now, you’ll need to take it easy,” the doctor was saying when I refocused.

“Take it easy?” Bridget asked, eyebrows quirking upwards.

“Yes. A woman of your build carrying triplets… given your history…”

“History? The triplets were a week premature. I had them naturally. You can’t possibly be suggesting that this is a high risk pregnancy, can you?” Her tone wasn’t sad or worried. It was angry. Like she was insulted.

“Mrs. Irwin, I’m simply saying we need to be cautious. We don’t want a repeat of pre-labor scares.”

“I have three three year olds, six classes of high schoolers, a husband, and a band that need me,” she said, her tone sharp. “Taking it easy isn’t something I have the luxury of doing. So, be straight with me, is there a reason to be worried?”

“No. Not at all. You’re healthy. They’re healthy. You’re still young. But we do need to take previous experience into consideration.”

She scoffed, turning to me.

I squeezed her hand, stepping up to be the man she believed I was. “You got us, baby. Tour’s right around the corner. Whatever it takes, whatever you need, you’ll have us by your side at every step.”

“Right, the touring,” the doctor said, knowingly.

“Can she not go?” I asked. If she couldn’t go on tour, I didn’t know what we're going to do because each option seemed worse than the last. I could go and take the triplets with me, but she would fight me- and win because she would cry- because she didn’t want to be away from her babies. She could stay with the triplets, but I would fight because she was supposed to be taking it easy and I didn’t want to be away from her and my babies, and we would both cry and lose that fight. Or, I could not go on tour, pissing off management, fans, and her because “Ashton Fletcher, it’s your job. We’ll be fine,” which would circle back to fighting over the first two options again.

The doctor smiled. “There’s nothing to worry about. Everybody’s healthy. We’re only 8 weeks in.”

“Then why are you worrying me with this ‘previous experience’ shit?” Bridget sighed. Her glasses pushed up as she pinched her nose. “I’m sorry. You’re the doctor. You’re just making me aware of all the different possibilities. But we’re all healthy?”

“Yes. Everyone is healthy and growing as expected.”

“Then that’s all that matters.”

~~~

“Alright guys, you ready?” Bridget asked excitedly, handing each triplet a cupcake. Her and I already knew the genders: 2 boys, 1 girl- balance. And we were handing each triplet a cupcake of the opposite gender to gauge their reactions. They knew Momma had babies in her tummy. They knew that made everybody excited and Momma extra cranky and tired. They were excited to be big siblings, even helping me sing every night. But right now, the focus was on the sugary sweet in their hands.

“Cupcakes!” they cheered and we giggled at their excitement.

“Whoa, hold on,” I said, hands reaching out to stop them from shoving the desserts in their mouths. “You gotta wait a second.”

“Alright. Irwin triplets revealing Irwin triplets in 3… 2… go!” Bridget said from behind her phone.

“Blue!” the girls said, excitement in their brown eyes.

“Pink!” Connor shouted, outraged, crossing his arms. “I wanted blue!” came the wail, the lip quiver, and the tears.

“Aw, Connor, it’s okay, Bubba,” Bridget soothed from behind the camera. “It means you’re gonna have another sister!”

“No!” The wail became louder and he kicked his legs, throwing the cupcake. “No sister! Brother!”

“Bubba, you are. Look at sissies and their cupcakes,” I urged. “You’re gonna get 2 brothers!”

Now the girls wailed, realizing what was happening. “No! No brother! Sister!” Two more thrown cupcakes. Three pairs of kicking legs. Three high-pitched wails of despair.

“Well, that went about as planned,” Bridget shrugged, turning the camera. “Triple the trouble just got crazier.” She ended the video and put her phone in her pocket. “Alright, hey!” she said, making her voice happy for them. “Everybody gets what they want. Connor, you’re getting a brother. Girls, you’re getting a sister. See? No tears. C’mon,” she coaxed.

“I have an idea!” I said, trying to help. “You guys wanna go see our new home?”

Bridget looked at me, her eyes wide. “What?! We got the house?!” she shrieked, clamping her hand over her mouth in shock. “The one with the basement and the pool?”

I nodded, grinning. She had been picky in our house search. I had wanted a house big enough for everyone to have their own bedroom. She wanted a house small enough to clean herself. And when her eyes light up as we toured the 4-bedroom house with a basement and a pool, I knew I would pay whatever price I had to to get it for her. “Got the keys this morning.”

“Oh, Ash, I love you.”

“I love you, too, baby,” I said, kissing her.

“Ew!” the triplets giggled.

~~~

“Cal, this is your goddaughter, Teagan Caroline,” I said, handing Calum the purple bundle.

“Welcome to Team Cal,” he smiled down at her.

“Luke, this is Ryan Lee, your godson,” I said, placing the red bundle in Luke’s arms.

“Check it out, Lo-Ro,” Luke cooed at his goddaughter, crouching to show her Ryan. “Wanna help me paint his nails and find him some boots?”

“Yeah!” she agreed happily. Then, “Unca Lu, new boots, too, please?”

“You can have whatever you want, princess.”

I rolled my eyes, placing the green bundle in Mike’s arms. “Mike, meet Gavin Mitchell.”

“Aw, what’s up, buddy?”

Calum snickered, realizing the naming pattern. “Who named them this time? I see the theme.”

Bridget grinned, proud of herself. “Are you saying that sharing your initials with your godkids isn’t the cutest fuckin shit?”

“It’s pretty fuckin genius, is what it is.”

~~~

“This color!” Logan’s voice yelled.

“No, this one!” Monroe shouted back.

“It’s my room, too!” Teagan, put in angrily.

“Daddy!” All three blondes with brown eyes turned to me.

I sighed, rubbing at my face. Painting rooms was going to be a nightmare. “Boys, did you guys pick a color?” I asked with another sigh, ignoring the glares. Just another day with two sets of triplets.

Three brown haired, hazel-eyed boys, one a head taller than the other two, shook their heads at me. “We all want different colors too, Daddy.”

“Baby?” I asked, my eyes pleading for her for some of that compromising greatness that has weathered every disagreement and tantrum for the last eight years.

“They have 4 walls,” she shrugged. “Let’s pick a base color for the fourth wall and then they call all paint a wall how they want?”

“That’s a lot of paint that’s gonna go to waste, baby.”

“So, we’ll have a paint war in the basement.”

“Paint war!” the boys grinned.

Hours later, bedroom walls painted, the Great Paint War of 2029 took place in the basement, walls and skin a splattered mosaic rainbow.

~~~

“Happy New Year,” I whispered, pulling her in for a kiss.

“Ew!” six voices giggled.

“Happy 10 years,” she smiled back, a hand shooing the kids away. “Go bother your godfathers.”

“We’ve been married 8 years,” I corrected.

“We’ve been together 10 though,” she told me. “Best decade of my life.”

“Best decade of mine,” I answered back.

She sighed in content, leaning into me. “This is everything I ever prayed for.”

“And you’re not even religious,” I teased.

“I don’t have to be religious to believe, Ash. If this past decade has taught me anything, it’s that we make our own magic.”

“You just said you prayed for this,” I laughed at her endearing inconsistencies.

“Just in case,” she smirked. “Didn’t wanna mess this up. Can never be too careful.”

“Thank God for answered prayers.”

“Thank God for all of my wrongs leading me right to you. And that leather vest. Do you still have that by any chance?”

I laughed. “Depends. Do you still have that black dress.”

“See me around later and find out.”

I laughed again, pulling her tight to me. “I love you.”

“Every part?”

“Every part.”

“Me too. You’re my favorite part of everything, Ash.”

“Even your new favorite holiday?”

“Especially my new favorite holiday.” Then, her lips were on mine for my favorite time-stopping, earth-shattering kiss.

#when i pray for you #ashton irwin #ashton fic #dad!ash #5sos #galcal irwin

16 notes · View notes

lumiereswig · 5 years

Note

Do you have any crossovers with/AUs inspired by "Moulin Rouge!"? I know there's a fics list page but my wifi is so stupid slow it never loads so I can never tell.

nope! srry

since u can’t load the fics page im gonna give it all to you right here boo

Lumiere discovers something new, post-curse: Matches

Plumette/Lumiere, pre-curse. Plumette growing up and Lumiere growing close. Lit By The Sun

Plumette/Lumiere, immediately after being cursed: Fire and Feathers

Lumiere meets the prince for the first time: A Showman Through and Through

Plumette/Lumiere as college kids: Modern AU that is not super great but eh i tried

plumiere in love: it’s right here for now (at least until I edit it and make it better)

here’s Scotland

“a maid that has a crush on Lumiere faking being Plumette and trying to seduce him”: hahaha this one still makes me laugh

abandoned ‘kidnapped’ fic—here

lumiere finding out plumette is pregnant: Here.

lumiere sees the baby for the first time: Here. Aww.

“a one shot in which plumette and lumiere go on a romantic tryst about the castle in the days following their wedding 💕”: poor cogsworth

Lumiere is the sexiest sandwich in the palace. Here.

Plumette gets sick, it’s really sad: Right over here, pal.

More plumiere falling in love here.

Tale as old as time, older than that guy, Beauty and Maurice.

garderenza backstory? here it is

So, like: what if Mulan showed up.

“can i please have a crack-shippy fic where everybody is in love with the wrong people.” Here.

figuring out how to be human again. here

lumiere/plumette body swap HERE.

“Movie night at the castle!” As you wish.

a bunch of other maids have a crush on lumiere and try to get his attention: a short fic about trapezes

“A group of poor motherless ducklings imprint on Plumette” QUACK QUACK.

“please expand on that night when Plumette and co. got drunk because of Chapeau’s brandy + wine idea…” I don’t know why I like writing drunk!staff so much but i DO

1991, MEET 2017!

What happened to Gaston? The only Gaston fic I’ll ever write, probably. Here.

He is nineteen. She is younger. Lumiere tells Plumette a fairytale. Lit by the Moon.

“How about a fic were the staff play light as a feather stiff as a board with Plumette as the board.“ what the fuck even is this game i am still confused but on y va, i guess

ATTRACTIVE FARMER MAN AND HIS TWO WIVES

Plumette’s last seconds before the curse takes hold. Laughing Still.

Forgotten. [Ongoing]

Plumiere in the rain. Quick mini-fic. I’ve Seen Fire and Rain

“quick question : how often does lumiere get sick?” Here.

“What if the day the curse was broken the staff go batshit crazy over being able to eat again so they eat until their stomachs hurt. Then Chip starts a food fight by throwing a bread roll at Cogsworth.” THIS HAPPENED?

“A dragon comes to try and eat Plumette” Lumiere is a fire-bender

“crack fic where they somehow discover theyre fictional” this one was so fun to write, lumiere picks up ewan’s scottish accent and hates it

“What about a really cute fic were Lumiere and Plumette fake being sick so they don’t have to work and get to spend the whole day together” poor cogsworth part 2

“Who gets the weird nightmares and who consoles the other at two in the morning because they’re in tears.” Me, because I just want my OTP to have nice things. Here.

”coffeeshop au but its still set in the 18th century“ BUT WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ROUSSEAU, THO??

“Can you write about Lumiere throwing Plumette a surprise birthday party for her?” hey

“Chip wants to be maître d’ someday and follows Lumière around the castle as his little protégé” he’s going to be a better one than lumiere here

“don’t think about how painful the transformation must have been for the servants" do i ever think of anything else. [the answer is no]

“*Whispers in your ear* AMNESIAC LUMIERE” FUCK. HOW’D YOU KNOW I LOVE AMNESIA FICS?? FUCK. ultimately one of my favorite fics. holy fuck

“*Whispers in your ear* AMNESIAC LUMIERE” part TWO, motherfuckers

“Maybe one during the curse where they can suddenly hear the soundtrack around them?“ poor cadenza

“What if somebody after the curse was broken just out of nowhere started playing the Aria. I NEED FEELS” have you thought about horrible things yet today

“The castle has to order in pizza” adam would like to register a complaint.

“Ewan McGregor and Lumiere switching universes" here

”A water balloon fight that gets out of hand?“ SPLASH.

Les Miserabeauty and the Beast. Here.

“Can you do where everyone is turn into a baby” ANGST

STANFOU ROMANCE

“Nutcracker AU?!” aw fuck here

“I Never Really Knew You”—Cadenza & Adam

“He Must Loathe Me”—Chapeau & Plumette

“The Sound of Her Weeping”—Garderobe & Lumiere

“Her Little Satin Slippers”—Cogsworth & Plumette

“Home”—Mrs. Potts & Plumette

“Chapeau’s Charade”—Belle & Chapeau

“Lullaby”—Garderobe & Plumette

“Cake in the Sun”—Lumiere & Stanley

“Like You Used To”—Adam & Garderobe

“Why The Beast Eats Like….That”—Chip & The Beast

“The Boy’s Hand”—Chip & Adam

“The Pink Vest”—Garderobe & Cogsworth

“Draw”—Maurice & Adam

“They’ll Never Meet Again”—Plumette & Garderobe.

“Her Beautiful Maman”—Garderobe & Plumette, in the parents AU. Also: Lumiere & Frou-Frou. Woof.

“have Belle and Adam watch batb 2017?” sure.

“I would love to see their reaction to singing in the rain! It’s my all time favorite movies!! ❤️❤️" 🌧🌧🌧🌧SAME 🌧🌧🌧🌧

“consider the coconut” MOANA CRACK.

“Plumiere goes to Paris?” Prequel fic! [oh là là]

“thy crackest crack of all - batb but adam/belle and lumiere/plumette swap places” lumiere turns into a dragon

“so. um. amnesiac adam?“ FUCK. FUCK.FUCK.

”Mary Poppins would be practically perfect in every way!” Feed the fucking birds

“I should have told you a long time ago.” Plumette wakes up, after their first night together. Fits into the “Lit by the Sun” story.

“This is why we can’t have nice things/you don’t see me”—right after the curse, Plumiere cope with their new forms. Angst?

“Prove It/You’re Drunk.” Lumiere had….a night of it. Poor Cogsworth, the Continuing Saga

“great comet” fic: the candle in the mirror

“I’ve been waiting a long time.” finally a happy!cogsworth fic. Tic toc.

“Batb and Frozen crossover pls“—it’s garbage

The whole palace body swaps. here

“What happens when Lumiere’s family wakes up and realizes they have a son at the palace?” well SHIT ! there’s a prompt

“Chapeau having to relearn and figure out how to play the violin once he’s turned into a coatrack.” Shh.

a cuisinier fic! this fandom doesn’t deserve him

“Batb and Robin Hood crossover!!!!!” fuck

“how about the castle residents plays a giant game of live clue.” Adam would like to register another complaint

Lit by the Stars. Plumette and Lumiere meet for the first time.

“belle catches a cold?” i’m allergic to fluff

“how about amnesiac belle this time?” FUCK

w o w this one’s about plumette & belle sharing plague stories

“Can you do where Lumiere and Plumette babysit Chip while Mrs. Potts is working” cute? ??

Wedding Cake: it’s huge

“lightly read fanfiction.” RIGHT?!

“You should let them watch the classic movie Beauty and the Beast” here

“ plumette x lumière modern spies AU” here.

“cogsworth angst” YOU GOT IT dude

“Hi, could you do some fluff and angst headcanons for Madame de Garderobe and Cadenza please xx” the honeymooners

“Shalalalalala my oh my, looks like the boy’s too shy, ain’t gonna kiss the girl” has lumiere ever been shy in his life ?

“Would you care to write a drabble of the castle redoing Mrs. and Mr. Potts’s wedding because Chip found his mother’s wedding dress and was bummed that he missed it?“ oh hey unrelated: i never dated a christmas ornament

“imagine plumiere first met AFTER they were turned into objects” um: FUCK YES.

“Batb characters in the titanic” too soon, people. too soon.

“Plumiere prompt: A whole new world! new fantastic point of view. No one to tell us no. Or where to go. Or say we’re only dreaming.” ok

“a touring theatre group comes to perform at the castle” this is more like a headcanon but it’s long as fuck so it ended up here

“cogsworth discovers he can fly” this is so wrong, this is so right

“Card Tricks”—Lumiere & Chip

“Coffee & Tea”—Lefou & Mrs. Potts

“Lion’s Mane”—Cuisiner & Plumette & Adam

“the characters read some of your fics and their reactions” o fuck. crack.

“Ok, but what about someone slipping Lumiere a love potion meant for Plumette??” kisses

Plumette stargazes; Lumiere dates someone else. Veronique

“ding dong we need more cogsworth- can we have something with him and mrs. potts bonding over all of their dumb kids” ding dong yes yes yes we do!

the villagers get cursed. a trash fic!!!![[[[ongoing]]]

Seating Arrangementsare! important! here.

“cogsworth sharing plumette’s first dance with her at her wedding, and…” I don’t dance.

poly garderenza/belle. i love this bullshit. i ship this

“Bonjour you wrote a fic about Luimere taking care of Plumette when she’s sick, can you write one about Plumette taking care of Lumiere? 💛💛” cough!

The First Untethered Hot Air Balloon Flight: oh, fuck.

garderenza content FEELS

“amnesiac belle?” COMPLETED, BITCHES. fucking ga w w d

“Can we have cogsworth headcanons?? Pretty please mon ami??” Dulce et decorum est.

“Eclipse”—Lumiere & Chip

what if the servants came awake again, in modern days? Here

‘do you remember when we were human?’ Plumiere shit.

A history lesson w/Cogs and Lums. Beware the dust. Album.

GARDERENZA HIGH SCHOOL AU !!!

“Woof”— Belle & Frou-Frou

“Fireworks”—Adam & Plumette

“Amnesiac Mrs. Potts?” Eh.

“a midsummer night’s dream au?” welcome to CRACK CITY [x]

“Plumette has a tragic, existential moment.” Pouf-pouf.

“a touring theatre group comes to perform at the castle. like some kind of magic, they can perform shows that don’t even exist yet” [x]

“I would love if you wrote when Plumette and Lumiere came up with Be Our Guest” BE! OUR! GUEST

“The castle adopts a pet? but not like a cat or anything, like they get a pet komodo dragon or something” welcome to the zoo

garderenza’s glory [x]

“Flicker In, Flicker Out.” The curse takes its toll.

“Who would be into divination? the Supernatural? Spooky Shit™?” HEY THERE DEMONS, IT’S YA BOI.

“If each of the servants could write a book, what would they be about?” The Villeneuve Catalog of Literature, fresh off the presses. [x]

“Cogsworth + Lumiere switch personalities?” i fuckin love a good crack prompt. showgirls!

“Socks”—Pere Robert & Mrs. Potts

adam and belle meet as tiny kids

COLLEGE FACULTY AU FIC

sad maurice fic: :)))))))))

“What do the servants do when they can’t sleep?” Shhhh.

Chip being in town when the curse strikes, here [ongoing!]

Belle gets used to the staff being, well.….human again. “New.”

“Have you ever done a role-swap where Belle was the princess and Adam was the boy from the village?“ CHIP. DON’T FUCK WITH THE TIME TRAVEL. Here.

The useless energy of haunted things. “Freaks of Furniture.” Thanks, JSTOR.

@batbobsession collab w/me called “One Moment”—their part is here, my part is there. The servants and the staff take a minute, right before the battle, to face what they’ve become.

“spooky prompt: What If the castle was haunted the year after belle breaks the spell…sadder prompt: What If the ghost was Adams mom…Worse prompt: or his father” THIS IS NOT THE FUN GHOST-HUNTING I ASKED FOR.

“Everyone says that Adam was under the spell ages, so what if the spell went on for 300+ years or whatever, and a woman hiking through the woods kind of went through what Maurice did with the tree being knocked over…” Fucking!!!! Granola bars!!!!!!!!!!!![x] [Ongoing.]

How desperate I became. To erase. To unmake my mouth, my pulse. / To unlive. “The Writing-Desk.”

“So Very Different”—Cuisinier & Garderobe

“how would the staff and Belle and Adam react to some little kids from the village showing up trick-or-treating?“ Something like this, I imagine.

“Amnesiac Cadenza?” i do fucking love an amnesia ask

“During the curse, Adam begins to see ghostly apparitions of the servants’ human forms.” Dead men walking.

“Spooky prompt: A haunted house in Villeneuve.” i just want to talk to the demons!

“These Two Need More Love”—Chapeau & Cuisinier

“A piece inspired by the song, “A Shoulder to Cry On,” aka, ‘80S MUSIC FICS

“Adam, Belle + staff go to pick out/chop down their own Christmas tree……” Yule fic by me + other people! ho ho ho.

way down in hadestown

The fandom-spanning fic, involving Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Doctor Who, and Tulio and Miguel.

“Everyone must leave something behind when he dies, my grandfather said.” Evermore. Thanks Ray Bradbury.

“idk how she got there but Garderobe rules the world.” ❤️

“Oh! How about a story or headcannons of Shane and Ryan doing a Buzzfeed Unsolved Video at the enchanted castle in BatB?” [wheeze] (a FAVE)

“Words”—Garderobe & LeFou.

“what if someone confused the servants with the royals, cuz they dress better than adam and belle?” This happens regularly.

“Pere Robert somehow comes across a Time Turner” ⏳tick-tock⌛️

“Crackfic prompt: Belle is messing around with magic books (AGAIN) and somehow summons dinosaurs.” that’s , uh, that’s chaos theory

plumiere SNUGGLING FOR WARMTH TROPE????

“The BATB characters stumble into The Great Comet” EVERYBODY RAISE A GLASS

“So I’m reading the Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater…..” Here.

“Please give me more singing hair brush!” the fucking hairbrush. Here.

“Please can I have a bunch of adorable hcs where Garderenza are prepping Bassette for their first concert with her singing in it too” that is a hairbrush

arrrrGGHHHH, mateys, that thar be a magical pirates fic, shiver me timbers

“lumiere gets a sunburn” ouCh

“for adelle: maybe the Official Proposal?” Here.

“ what if. an amnesia fic. where they. ALL. Got. A m n e s I a“ —MY BRAND~

“Headcanons for Belle and Adam being the world’s greatest grandparents?” also known as “be a bear, grandpa!”

“Garderenza prompt: ‘You saved my life!’” oh how divine

belle keeps playing with magic and getting everybody fucked

this collab fic with @theteaisaddictive is done! “agathe gets amnesia”

“Whisky and Red Wine”—Lumiere and Belle have a night in.

“AU idea: As belle is leaving the second time, something stops her and she turns and whispers ‘I love you’ before running off.” Can you say “two idiots”?

“ have you ever done any asks about what you think maurice/belle’s mum’s life was like before they had belle???” I AM ALWAYS HERE FOR THE MAURICE SAD!FICS [x]

“something sweet with adam and the plumiere child.” sweet as stolen breakfasts.

“Belle messing with magic again finds one that puts the universe into reverse” this one is straight crack i hope you like it

chip is the middle man for some major lumiworth action

“A traveller stops by for directions […] by coincidence, he’s one of Belle’s *very favorite* authors.” Wow I wonder if the world’s biggest book nerd is going to handle this in a responsible manner [x]

“a man attending a ball at the palace spots plumette, and falls in love with her beauty. she receives an anonymous present of heart-shaped chocolates on her bedside the next day, and assuming they are a present from her dear lover, eats them without a thought. moments later…..” Not exactly this trope but uhhhh it’s a love potion fic babyyyyyyy

#PLEASE REBLOG THIS POST #beauty and the beast #batb #batb 2017 #it's shorter than the other rlly long one #but also uhhhhh h u h looks like i wrote 2 many fics #ooOOps #fire hands candle hands trashdelabra stans #its lumiereswig b i t c h

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kootenaygoon · 5 years

Photo

So,

When Paisley and I first broke up in February 2016, I spent a few weeks in rapturous relief before realizing what a dire state I’d left myself in. I was nearly homeless, with a few car-loads of possessions that I was lugging from one temporary refuge to the next. She got the dogs, I got the RAV-4. It was dark days, and suddenly the reality TV star that everybody thought would’ve dropped out of the presidential race by now was getting taken more and more seriously. I didn’t believe the rhetoric, didn’t believe the people saying Donald Trump could win. He reminded me of Cam Carpenter, a right wing bully, and I hated him from the moment he started making headlines.

What did interest me, though, was how he was using social media to his advantage. Here was a senior citizen weaponizing Twitter in ways that astonished me. The pundits were dissecting each tweet, word for word, while press releases from other candidates sat unopened in their inboxes. He’d found a way to circumvent the media, then make them scramble to keep up to the conversation he was creating. They were treating him as a joke while playing right into his hands. It was like watching a magic trick in slow motion.

I’d been a reporter in the Yukon when Obama first began campaigning, and I remember the sensation of giddy hope that came with the idea the U.S. was finally going to elect its first black president. It felt like finally, now, things were going to be better. Fast forward eight years and this sexist bigot was proving that there was plenty of opposition to progress, plenty of people keen to give this orange-faced huckster the reins. And coming to terms with that felt like accepting that the world was a darker, shittier place that I’d once thought. I was glad to have found my Kootenay refuge, but I feared for the future.

After crashing for a week with Niles, enjoying his John Cooper artwork and sharing joints over morning coffee, I ended up moving in with a newly elected city councillor named Anna Purcell. She lived with her husband Gary and a German exchange student I didn’t like. Anna had earned more votes in the election than any other councillor, and it was easy to see why. She had the perfect amount of Nelson quirk, while being ultra-articulate and incredibly passionate about her new gig. She was the type of person who walked her talk. When I interviewed her for the Star she’d been outspoken about the affordable housing crisis, so I knew she would understand if I asked her for a place to stay. She lived just a few blocks up from Paisley’s place, meaning I would have to pass by it every morning on the way to work.

“When my ex left me, it was like the words were bonked out of me,” Anna said, sitting in her living room one afternoon. “I just couldn’t talk for a while after that. I literally couldn’t speak.”

I told her I felt embarrassed after writing that love-drenched introductory column for the paper, and making Paisley such a big part of my public persona. Now everyone was going to know I fucked up my family, and would be watching the fall-out like a soap opera.

“I feel like this is such a huge hit to my social capital, you know? Like I used to be a guy with a partner and a place and some dogs, now I’m just a guy. With nothing.”

Anna shook her head. “That’s enough. I don’t think it will be as big a hit as you think. It’s not like single people have less value, right?”

Once a week I would swing by Paisley’s place to pick up Muppet and Buster. We would take the train tracks to Red Sands, or trek along Baker Street and down to the Prestige, but I didn’t have a dog-friendly place to take them home to. Sometimes I just walked them around the block, hanging out at the Central School playground en route, then brought them back an hour later. At first I was having no problem processing my separation from Paisley, but with the dogs it was different. They were blameless, had no idea what was going on. One afternoon I sat on a random lawn and held them to my chest, weeping. I called my parents and sobbed into the phone.

“I don’t mean to be insensitive, but you need to stop crying in front of the dogs,” Paisley said, standing in the doorway of her house. “It really upsets Muppet.”

“How did you know I was crying?”

“Last time you took them she came home and she wouldn’t sit still, she was stressed out and wagging her little body around. She knows something is wrong.”

“Well, this feels wrong.”

Paisley was having no trouble transitioning into the next stage of her life. Her dessert business was thriving, she was dating new guys and making new friends. She posted so many pictures with her new roommate that people started to wonder if they were a couple. She had shaved her head, Britney Spears-style, in the midst of our breakup, but now her hair had grown into a cute pixie cut. She looked like Winona Ryder in Alien Resurrection, and when she stood with her hands on her hips you could read her tattoo: It Could Be Worse...

“What’re you eating these days? How are you feeding yourself?” she asked.

I shrugged. “Nachos, peanut butter and jam, stuff like that.”

She shook her head. “Peanut butter and jam?”

“You know I’m just keeping it simple. I don’t have many groceries.”

“But you’re still going to CrossFit?”

“Yeah, I told Ali I couldn’t afford it and she was like ‘just keep coming, and get the money to me when you can’. I think she knows what I’m going through, you know?”

“That’s nice of her. How’s Rock of Ages?”

Having something extracurricular to focus on had been crucial for me, otherwise I would’ve spent all my time either crying, smoking pot or sleeping. For the audition I’d ripped off my shirt and belted my way through an 80s power ballad, earning a spot in the chorus. I’d been given one half-sentence solo at the beginning of a song early in the show, and for the rest of the production I swapped my time between being the bartender of the Bourbon Room and a slimy producer who creeps on the female lead. It was keeping me just busy enough to feel stable, and made me feel like I was in high school school again.

For the Star coverage, I did a photo shoot with the cast at an abandoned building near the Selkirk College campus. It was covered in the expected graffiti and looked like it would be a perfect setting for a horror movie. At the time there was a particular cartoon that had been popping up all over town, Thug Bear, and he showed up in a few of the shots. There was a main couple, then a rockstar named Stacey Jaxx who had been played by Tom Cruise in the movie version, and a quartet of sexy nymphs. The costumes were neon and pastel, with big wigs and plenty of bare skin. Though they were squinting into a harsh afternoon sun, I got an awesome shot that ended up on the cover.

The rehearsals were more challenging than I was expecting. The choreography for the dance sequences was intricate, the pace that we were putting things together was faster than I was accustomed to, and I felt way out of my depth when it came to the singing. I’d been a soloist in the church choir as a kid, and I’d done a few musicals in high school, but I hadn’t sung in front of people for years. As the weeks passed I became increasingly more nervous, though I knew I was basically just background furniture for the other actors.

One day a woman named Siobhan approached me. She was part of the production, a swaggering farm girl with a sarcastic streak. Rehearsal was just about to start, and I’d just put down my bag.

“I’ve been meaning to thank you,” she said.

I smiled, expecting a joke. “Oh yeah, for what?”

“That picture that you took of Andrew Stevenson, the one where he’s handcuffed and being led into court? I wanted to thank you for taking that photo.”

I blinked for a moment, caught off guard. “Thanks, yeah. I was really happy to get that shot. It took me over a year.”

She took a deep breath. “Well, I was there in court for the proceedings, but I never got a chance to really see his face, not like you can see it in that photo. When I saw it, it honestly blew me away.”

I was confused. “So who’s this guy to you?”

“I was one of the bank tellers that day, at the credit union he robbed. He waved his fucking gun right in my face. Traumatized me. I’d been having nightmares about this guy for months, every night, and it was like he wasn’t human. With a black mask, jumping around and screaming like some sort of ghoul. That’s what I saw every night when I closed my eyes.”

“Holy shit.”

“Then I saw that photo, Will, and it changed everything. I saw he was just a human, just a normal human, just like everyone else. He wasn’t some supernatural monster who was out to get me. He couldn’t hurt me anymore. That’s what that photo did for me. So that’s what I’m saying thank you for.”

“I don’t even know what to say.”

She smiled warmly, and hugged me. “You don’t have to say anything.”

The Kootenay Goon

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clownsgobeepbeep · 5 years

Text

Pink

@grotesquegabby

I intended to write angst but...wow...this is so much more than that

I apologize for there’s a lot of hurtful words in here, and I promise to make it up in the fic after the next one if not actually next uwu

Ula hated him.

If she had a heart, she would have hated him with all of it.

Ula hated Davey.

That was what he kept telling himself. She hated him so much, maybe Schrader and everybody else were wrong. Ula couldn’t even bear to see him, it was such a terrible feeling.

Davey should have never said any said or treated Schrader the way he did that other day. Surprisingly, he had forgiven the sailor and reassured him that things were bound to get better.

“What does that mean?” Davey asked Schrader after they had shared a lengthy hug, eventually pulling himself away to wipe his tears that would still not cease. “It can’t rain all the time?”

“It means that no matter what, a light will eventually come and break through the darkness. There has to be a sun some time you know.” Schrader told him. “Ula doesn’t hate you, she never could. Her thoughts are just clouded by some anger that’ll eventually go away, and she’ll show her love for you once again.”

That wasn’t true. It wasn’t, Davey kept telling himself.

Ula had even made sure to tell Cordelia to close her bedroom door so Davey wouldn’t come in. She really hated him…

The little clown wiped away the tears that rolled down his cheeks as he sat up in bed. Only hurtful thoughts about his older entered his mind. She really preferred to see Atlas instead of him, it hurt so much.

Davey gave a whimper, wiping his entire face, then laying on his bed as he hugged one of his toys. He looked down at it, crying even more as he realized it was one Ula had gotten for him, when she loved and cared for him. The plush brought memories that hurt to think about because of the fear Davey felt, so terrified that he would never see his sister happy when around him again. So, Davey hugged is toy even tighter as he cried into it, shutting his eyes in hopes of sleeping till the next day. Sometimes, dreams were a lot better than reality was.

Hopefully, Ula wouldn’t be so upset by then.

Knock knock.

Davey slightly opened his eyes, feeling as they were still quite watery. He then lifted his head to eventually sit up while still clutching onto his toy.

“Davey? Are you there?”

Davey’s eyes widened at the voice and he immediately climbed off his bed, rushing over to his closed door. He reached up and grabbed the doorknob, hesitating as he felt his face scrunch up with more teas while another two knocks sounded.

“Davey?”

He opened the door before hiding his crying face behind his plush toy, feeling more tears pour out as he saw her.

“Davey...I...we need to talk.” Ula’s voice told him as she gently moved away the plush in front of him, and she cooed at his flustered expression while caressing his cheeks as her nails softly grazed his skin. “Oh Davey...what’s been going on with you?”

“Ula, U-Ula...I-I didn’t, I didn’t mean it! I-I-I don’t hate Sch-Schrader!” Davey sobbed out as his nails dug into his plush toy. “I’m so sorry...I-I really am.”

“Davey, stop.” Ula shushed as she wiped away his tears, giving him a smile, holding his face. “I don’t care about that.”

“But Ula-”

“I hate you either way.”

Davey stood paralyzed at the sound of those words, looking at Ula with wide eyes before she gave a laugh.

“You seriously think I love you? Or would ever do that again?” she continued laughing before releasing Davey to shove him away but pushing his head. Davey fell backwards onto the ground before Ula reached over to grab his plush toy, looking over it with a laugh.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. What is this piece of shit?” she rolled her eyes, then ripping the plush toy in half to throw it over to Davey. “You can’t get any affection from me or anybody else, so you go to these stupid toys? How pathetic.”

Davey couldn’t believe any of the things Ula was saying to him, this couldn’t be real.

“Oh don’t give me that look. Teary eyes just aren’t your thing, it doesn’t work on anybody.” Ula mocked, leaning down towards Davey who backed away. However, Ula’s hair shot down to tightly wrap around his ankles, forcefully dragging him closer towards her as she hovered above him.

“You think that everything’s just supposed to go your way, huh?”

“No! No I don’t!”

“You think that by throwing a little temper tantrum, I’m going to be all over you as if you were a good brother?”

“No!”

“What next? Are you going to do that to Atlas too? Do it. Do it so I can have a reason to hate you even more.” Ula grit her teeth at Davey who gave a whimper, trying to sink into the ground to get away from her which proved to be impossible. “I’ve always hated you Davey, ever since I learned you were in my mother’s womb. You came along, and you took everything away from me! Everything!”

Ula reached a hand down towards Davey, grabbing his collar before pulling him up so he was right in front of her face.

“Say something you coward.”

Davey sobbed as he shook his head, hearing as Ula groaned while rolling her eyes again. She soon dropped him back onto the ground.

“I swear, you really are good for nothing. Pathetic. Small minded. Selfish. Stubborn. Want me to say more?”

“Ula, please.” Davey breathed out, watching as his sister shut the door behind her. Davey crawled backwards as Ula followed right after him, right up until Davey’s back hit his bed, giving him nowhere else to go.

“Ula-”

“Shut up!” Ula snapped as she lunged forward with claws and now bright pink eyes. “I’ve had enough of you! Enough, do you hear me!? I want nothing to do with you and I want you out of my life for good!”

Davey weeped, shutting his eyes as he curled up and attempted to hide himself. However, this was futile as he heard footsteps, causing him to open his eyes and look to see two other figures, very tall ones.

“In fact, I think I’ll be the one who gets out of your life. Knowing you, you’ll just stay and be a weeping, bothering mess.” Ula smiled, fluttering her eyelashes as she turned to each of the figures who were easily recognized as her ex and current boyfriend. “Right boys?”

“Just leave this kid already Ula.” Schrader scoffed as he grabbed her waist, making her giggle before he looked at Davey. “Always being a little shit, made my life hell.”

“Schrader, I-I thought-” Davey shook his head, completely confused at what he was hearing yet so hurt.

“ He says, ‘I don’t hate you!’. Fucking ridiculous.”

“Oh yeah, I agree.” Atlas nodded before taking Ula away from Schrader, dipping her which made her give a delighted laugh as he looked at Davey. “Whatever chance he gets, always being so damn annoying.”

“We should just leave.” Schrader commented, crouching down in front of Davey to flick his forehead. “Never come back.”

“I like that idea very much.” Ula was now brought back up as both Atlas and Schrader held her. “Let’s go far away from this piece of shit.”

“UIa! P-please!” Davey cried out as he tried crawling over towards his sister, but she stuck out of foot and placed it on his head to keep him in place.

“P-p-p-please! Please what Davey? Stay here with you?”

“I-I love you Ula! You-re m-my big s-s-sister!”

“No, I’m not. You might have come out of my mother’s womb, but you are nothing to me.” Ula spat out, shoving Davey away once again before turning to Atlas and Schrader again. “Besides, I think it’s much better when I’m with either one of these two. Or how about both? Both sounds great, and better than a second with you.”

“Ula…”

“So, Davey?” Ula leaned down towards Davey. “Good night.”

Before Davey was able to react, Ula’s eyes turned pink once again as her hand grew into a claw. She directed her hand towards Davey, about to slash at him before she gave a blood curdling scream.

In an instant, Atlas and Schrader faded away as Ula held her chest in pain, feeling such agony before she fell backwards. Ula continued screaming as her whole body started to morph, turning different colors, all dark. Sharp shapes came in and out of her as she screamed, her pink eyes being the only light in her.

And then, Davey felt himself shaking. He started to panic, he was shaking violently, like it was some kind of earthquake. As this happened to him, Ula was letting out inhuman shrieks that made Davey cover his ears, shutting his eyes as the shaking continued until-

“Davey! Davey!”

Davey’s opened his eyes, completely terrified as he was still shaking, but not as violently. He then realized that it wasn’t him who had been doing the shaking, but rather the girl holding him to wake him up.

“You’re awake!” she exclaimed, both whipping around to see a boy who stabbed a knife right into Davey’s wall. Soon, he stabbed one time after another continuously before whatever he had been stabbing faded away...into his knife, a pink color present.

“Davey, are you okay?” the girl asked, Davey turning to her as he remembered who she was.

“F...Flora?”

“Yes, it’s me. We could tell you were having a bad dream.” Flora breathed out, then bringing Davey into a tight hug. He was in shock at first, but returned the embrace nonetheless as he began crying once again.

Flora looked over at her brother who placed a hand on the wall, holding himself up that way while his knife in the wall also managed to help.

Basil then held his chest, giving soft pants before taking his knife and placing his back on the wall, sliding down until he was on the ground. He then turned to look over at his sister and Davey, shutting his eyes to rest against the wall as Davey’s sobs were heard despite being muffled in Flora’s clothes.

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elenafisher · 5 years

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chelsea watches (read: is agonized by) “avengers: endgame”

i just got home from endgame and i have a lot to say about it!

OVERALL:

i... liked it? i think? i can’t tell.

there’s probably going to be a lot of complaining in this post, yet i didn’t actually hate the movie. but there was a lot to digest, so i’m sure my feelings will change over the next couple of weeks.

this movie was edited weird and i think it gave me whiplash.

the tone was dramatic and desperate, then lighthearted and fun, and then back to dramatic and desperate before i could so much as blink. it was very jarring!

it also made me cry.

robert downey jr. has always been very earnest in his portrayal of tony stark, but he gave all he had in this one. i was on the edge of tears watching him the whole time, really. there’s definitely a sense of finality to his performance.

those last 20 minutes had me weeping a bit. when they put the arc reactor on the bundle of flowers... oh, my heart. :’(

THE GOOD:

(most of) our characters are back!

but was there ever any doubt? the stakes were made to feel high, but they never really were. you always came away with the feeling that they were all gonna make it.

no word on vision, though! pretty confused about that one. i know he was killed after the snap occurred, so i don’t think they actually can bring him back, but i always thought that he would, since they have this to film still.

it was very well made. i hope they keep bringing back the people who work on the sets, the cinematography, and the lighting, because it was all so well done.

we need to raise one for alan silvestri and his amazing soundtrack.

oh, did anyone else notice the emphasis on DAUGHTERS?

tony’s daughter morgan

scott’s daughter cassie

clint’s daughter lila

thanos’s "daughters”, nebula and gamora

to me, it felt like they were setting up these girls for potentially taking up their father’s mantles, which would actually be cool as fuck.

morgan stark is absolutely the cutest little bean i’ve ever seen in my life.

I LOVE YOU 3000!

her scenes with tony were so sweet.

that cheeseburger parallel... oh man.

really, every scene that every person shared with tony was really good. you can just feel that everybody was giving everything they had because they knew they only had so much time left to play these characters together, and they wanted to get these final performances right.

tom holland, you heartbreaker. the audience in my theater went absolutely nuts when he finally returned. but when he was crying as he was talking to tony for the last time, oh man.

“i lost the kid.” please...

THE BAD:

i still don’t really get what they’re doing with thor.

i don’t share this opinion much because this is tumblr and everyone loves this movie, but i didn’t like ragnarok, and i don’t like what’s become of thor or bruce. i wasn’t really checking on these two before, but now they’re just the comedy reliefs of the MCU.

chris hemsworth is funny, of course, and thor is a badass, of course, but they were just trying so hard with him.

it kind of feels like they’re just pulling him apart, like one group still wants him to be the noble leader of asgard and the other just wants him to be the court jester. so, rather than decide, they just mushed their ideas together.

captain marvel: i knew she wasn’t going to be in the movie much, because she would’ve done everything in, like, 30 minutes, but they really, really underutilized her. seriously, she was only in this one, at most, for five minutes.

but, in those five minutes, she got a new haircut and kicked all kinds of ass, which are both wins.

THE UGLY:

STEVE ROGERS, SIR, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

i can’t believe they hit the undo button on cap’s story.

rather than have him grow and develop in his new role in the future he never wanted or expected to receive, they just had him go back in time to marry the one that got away.

but don’t get me wrong y’all; steve and peggy hurt me so good. i live for their angst. but they weren’t supposed to get together like this!

it’s gross because peggy moved on. she was able to pick up the pieces and create something wonderful for herself by having a fulfilling career and a happy marriage with another man.

steve should’ve accepted her choice. if he loves her so much, he should’ve accepted that he lost her and, since she moved on without him, he has to move on without her.

i can almost get the poetic cinema that they were going for: after tony loses his chance at having a family and living his life, steve is woken up and realizes how much he’s been missing out on, so he decides to go out there and discover what he’s been running away from all this time.

but, rather than do those things, or literally anything else, steve goes back in time to... marry peggy.

like, he could’ve traveled the world with sam and bucky, or gone solo for a while, or even hit up sharon again.

sharon carter, what a waste. they really couldn’t commit to the idea of her and steve together, could they?

but as soon as they confirmed sharon to be peggy’s niece, there was just no way a romance could blossom. it’s kind of hilarious how in a cinematic universe where raccoons talk, characters time travel, and AIs can be 3D printed, kissing the niece of your former flame is still considered to be the weirdest thing about it.

seriously: i find it all so vulgar and manipulative.

the one good thing that came out of this was sam wilson, the only worthy captain america, receiving the shield.

i’ve read that some people are upset that sam got the shield instead of bucky. like, did y’all watch the last movie? let bucky have his plums and his goats. he’s done fighting other people’s wars.

THE EVEN UGLIER:

i got problems, y’all, and those problems have two names: natasha romanoff and clint barton.

i ship these two because everything in the avengers (2012) led me to believe that these super cool assassins who were fighting each other were actually in love with each other and it was them against the world (which doesn’t sound familiar at all, i know).

the characters had history and scarlett johansson and jeremy renner had chemistry. i saw it and i know all y’all saw it.

so, y’all can imagine how goddamn appalled i was when i first read that natasha and clint were not only not lovers, but that clint actually had a secret family, with a secret wife, on a secret farm, and that we were going to be told this with absolutely no build-up whatsoever.

but y’all could tell that the russos were as tired as i was when it came to accepting those facts!

they decided to throw caution to the wind and show some more intimacy between natasha and clint, which was delicious. finally, some good fucking food.

i mean, the necklace? she was wearing her necklace again!

to me, it seemed like natasha had fallen in love with him all those years ago, but he was either already married or had turned her down (or both?), and she was never able to act on her feelings for him. i think that clint was also in love... and perhaps knew that he could never be with her, because of their lifestyles and her past, and chose laura instead. or something agonizing and unfulfilling like that.

(i really hope her upcoming movie expands on this.)

and i do think that she loved him. like, romantically. she couldn’t stop touching him the whole movie (HER HANDS ON HIS FACE!!! she’s so worried for him i’m crying) and was shaking, she was so relieved, upon being reunited with him.

it is some consolation that no matter what, you are never able to deny that natasha and clint love each other: even when they’re not romantic partners, they are definitely platonic life partners. their mutual devotion to one another, in almost every universe in the comics and in these movies, is incredibly strong and moving.

so, rather than endure clint’s death, natasha chose to sacrifice herself so that he could get the stone and, ultimately, be reunited with his family. and, on paper, it sounds okay... except, it really isn’t.

y’all wanna know why it’s not okay?

it’s not okay because natasha was an original avenger, and we were never given the chance to spend time with her, or become emotionally invested in her journey, or to care about her reasons for making the ultimate sacrifice.

like, i cared about natasha, but i felt that i would’ve cared so much more (and that the audience could’ve, as well) had we’d been able to have a front row seat to her “atonement” arc.

because, as an audience, we sort of started in medias res: while she was not initially forthcoming with who she was or what she was doing, natasha came to be seen as a reliable and capable ally by the avengers, her second appearance onscreen. we are given no real reason to distrust her because she’s so desperate to find redemption, which she’s made apparent in almost every movie, and it’s hard to hate somebody working so strongly for another chance.

i mean, this journey would’ve been made so much more badass by us experiencing it firsthand, rather than relying on the hearsay from the directors, writers, and actors. we should’ve gotta a miniseries starring natasha romanoff as the black widow, so we could finally see what she did to become so disgusted with herself and so feared by everyone else.

this is (partially) why so many people adore bucky. we’ve seen him as the best friend, the fellow comrade, before he was forced to become a mindless killing machine. we’ve seen him kill and cause absolute mayhem. but now we’re watching bucky grow out from that and become something more (and, hopefully, something better).

basically, natasha romanoff should’ve received that same treatment. we needed to explore all of her facets, not just some of them.

tl;dr: we should’ve had more time with natasha.

it’s also not okay because natasha’s sacrifice, one that was both irreversible and absolutely pivotal to the fate of the final battle, was not given nearly the same amount of respect that tony received after his demise.

while we all owe a lot to robert downey jr. for his choice to portray, and continue portraying, tony stark / iron man, he is not the most important avenger.

it’s also worth noting that he did not have to be the one to snap his fingers. i mean, anyone could’ve been given what tony was wearing and then wielded the gauntlet. but, like natasha, he made a choice to sacrifice his life for the greater good.

yet, only tony was given an elaborate funeral. no matter how you slice it, it’s enormously disrespectful to a veteran team member. for this ultimate sacrifice to be made by the only woman on the original crew is doubly insulting.

AND ALL OF THIS IS MADE WORSE BY THE FACT that natasha’s death mirrors gamora’s. they’re identical, right down to the music that plays and how the camera focuses on their bloody bodies.

the russos were probably trying to invoke poetic cinema again here, but the scene comes across as somewhat lazy and insincere. like, they can’t even kill her right!

as terrible as this scene is, i want to give scarlett and jeremy a round of applause for it. you really got the sense that these characters were more than ready to die for each other, and that’s only because scarlett and jeremy were able to sell the emotional intimacy of the scene so well.

all of it is too little, too late, however.

allow me to conclude this rambling nonsense by stating that i also think they condensed her character arc too much. like, i know this branches off of what i was just talking about a dozen bullet points ago, but even if natasha were to receive this ending, i feel that she received it too soon, y’know?

there should’ve been more scenes in the previous films dedicated to her, and her feelings, and how she relates to any given situation, because another problem that drags this scene down is the lack of any information about natasha.

like, even when assembled with the other avengers, she feels remote.

perhaps that’s intentional, given that the character’s a spy and has been enigmatic about every other area of her life for so many years. but i think she’s been written to be too enigmatic.

#endgame spoilers #chelsea.txt #this is so long lmao kudos to anyone that reads it #and yeah i probably have more thoughts swimming around in my head #but i've been trying to write this post for three hours now and i can't think of anything else to write lol #i need to watch the movie again

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temporaryforeversfanfic · 6 years

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Chapter 30

Queen

This was our second child but this was my first time really experiencing motherhood like this. Shai’s biological mother gave her up to Shad when she was little over a month old and I came back in the picture when she was almost four months so I missed those first few bonding months but the bond was still there of course. “Mommy can I hold the baby? Daddy said after lunch I can hold my baby!”

“Of course you can baby.” I smiled, picking her up to put her on me lap before reaching over to pick up SJ. She was so excited to be holding him. “Isn’t he the cutest?” Her smile quickly turned into a frown. “What’s wrong baby?”

“I thought you said I was the cutest!” I assured her that they were both the cutest to me but that wasn’t good enough for her. “I don’t wanna hold the stupid ugly baby anymore!” She tried throwing him but luckily I was really the one holding him the entire time.

“Shai, what the hell has gotten into you?!” I yelled, causing SJ to cry and Shad to run in the rooms asking what’s wrong. Shai started crying on cue as soon as she saw her father. He tried to pick her up but I was not having it. “Put her down now, she tried to throw my damn baby!”

“I’m sure it’s all a big misunderstanding babe. Right Shai?” She nodded her head with a smile on her face and that sent me completely through the roof. SJ was now calm, allowing me to put him in his crib and deal with his bratty older sister.

“Come with me Shai. I’m taking away all your toys and limiting your TV time to one hour a day for the next week.” She began weeping again. “No ma’am not this time! You know what you did and I know what you did, so go to your room don’t come out until I say so!” I took her out of Shad’s arms then guided her in the direction of her room, making sure she made it there.

“A little harsh don’t you think” I looked at Shad like he was crazy. “She was so excited to hold him, I doubt she’d try to do anything to her him.”

“Well she did! She called him a stupid ugly baby then tried to throw him on the floor!” I was so mad at Shai right now, I couldn’t even think straight. “And then she decides to lie about it once you come around!”

I don’t know what was Shai’s issue but we needed to get her straighten out.

Leeyah

Tonight was the night of my fashion line’s launch. I’ve been so busy making sure everything was perfect for the fashion show and after party, I barely had any time to spend with my family. “ I can’t wait until tonight is finally over.” I huffed, looking over at my husband whom was making funny faces in the mirror. “I really miss spending time with you and the twins.”

“I know babe.” He came over to me and started rubbing my belly. “Once tonight is over, we’ll go on that trip we been promising the kids. You know your daughter loves her some Minnie Mouse.” We promised them we’d take them to Disney World months ago but then life got just slightly a little more crazy for the Brown crew. “Plus with the new baby come, we might never get another chance to do this.”

“You’re right, this is the perfect time to bring them. I’m not too big yet and we did make a promise.” Our conversation was cut short by my assistant coming in to tell us it was showtime. “Okay babe, I’ll see you in a few.” I pecked Chris lips then got up to get this show on a road.

***

It was after party time and everybody that was anybody came out to celebrate me. The fashion show went off without a hitch and I was over the moon with excitement. “We have to make a toast!” Q declared before waving for a waiter to bring over some champagne. “Did you guys know that this was my first office outing since having SJ?”

“Me too!” Maya chimed in. “We are so happy for you Lee, seriously. This is a huge deal and we wish you all the success.” All three of us shared a group hung.

“Thank you guys so much. I know it was hard leaving your little babies at home but thank you for coming support me. I really do love y’all bitches!” Before we could get another word out, the music cut off.

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen.” My husband stood on stage in front of our guest. “I just want to say a few words about my wife tonight; whom I am very proud of by the way.” Hearing him call me his wife still gave me a bubbly feeling. “When I first met my wife, many many years ago, she was this quiet girl that refused to talk to me.” The crowd began to laugh. “No seriously, all of our friends can vouch for me on that one!”

“He ain’t lying!” Shad spoke out.

“See? I told y’all!” Chris laughed along with the crowd. “Now here we are today, married. It took us a long time to get here. It took me a lot up fuck ups to get here but I don’t regret it. Those life lessons made us what we are today.” I smiled at the special attention I was receiving from my husband. “I say all this to say that Leeyah Brown, you are my everything. You’re my best friend and I am so incredibly proud of the woman you are today. You supported me when I couldn’t even support myself. You believed in me when I’d lost all faith in myself. So here’s to my beautiful wife, the most incredible woman I’ve ever met.”

After that speech, there wasn’t a dry eye in the building, including mine. I mouthed a ‘thank you’ to him while he was still on the stage. Expecting him to meet me half way, I made my way over to the stage. “Before I let you guys go tonight, I would almost like to sing a song for y’all, if that’s okay.” Of course everyone yell for him to sing. “This is a song I wrote about my wife after we had our very first fight.

What the hell babe, Damn I ain't never felt this way Somebody, somebody, tell me I don't have a clue what to do When it comes to you Baby, you're so beautiful Every time I see you girl, it throw me off It's so unusual For me to be waiting But I don't want to blow it girl, But you should know this girl

I’ve heard Chris singing this song a hundred times but I never knew it was about me.

I'm not gonna be the one to mess this up Cause I done effed up in love before, I'ma be the one to take a back seat girl We can take our time and you can run this, Stay in, go out, Anything you want girl, we can do Girl are we going down, I don't know, But from here now baby I'm gone leave that up to you, I'ma leave it up to you

My husband definitely had a way with words.

Chris

I’ve been trying my hardest to contain myself all night at the Leelee’s clothing launch party. The way the dress she wore hugged her curves did something to me on a spiritual level, I just can’t explain it. Now we were home; alone, and I could finally do all the things I fantasized about all night. “What are you staring at Christopher?” She asked, snapping me out of my trance. I took that has my cue to get up from the bed and grab her by the waist.

“I’m looking at you. Is it a problem?” She couldn’t help but smirk at my smart response. “And what if I said there was a problem?” She said with that same devilish grin on her face.

“You tryna start something Mr. Brown?” Before I could answer, she pushed me on the bed with one swift motion. “You’re always the one in control, it’s my turn.”

She went over to the lights and dimmed it to set the mood. “You think you can handle that?” I knew taunting her would only make her more determined to see her plans through.

Making her way back over to me, she crawled over my y’all frame seductively, never breaking eye contact. She started at my neck, planting soft sweet kissing from my ear to my collar bone, making sure to add in a few nibbles here and there. As my hands roamed her body, I thought about how beautiful my wife is. She was almost three months along but you couldn’t really tell. She looked that good. She kissed all down my body until get got to my dick.

“Woah!” I stopped her. “You don’t have to do that babe.” I’m a man, of course I enjoyed getting my some head every once in a while but Leeyah was my wife now and I’d hate for her to fell like I was trying to disrespect her. “It’s my turn anyhow.”

Before she could protest, I gently flipped her over. Planting kisses down her body, I didn’t stop until I reached her spot. Soft moans slipped from her lips as I took my time making sure no spot went untouched. Her legs began to shake uncontrollably, that’s how I knew it was ready to cum. Before she could, she pushed me over so that I was on my back. Climbing on top, she positioned her body on top of mine, allowing me to enter.

“Shit!” We moaned together. She began bounce up and down, grinding her hips in perfect motion. Moments later we came together. She was knocked out before I could even leave to clean myself off.

***

I woke up around ten the next morning for my eleven o’clock meeting with my team. Leeyah was still sleep so I just let her be.

“We have a really wonderful offer for you Mr. Brown. I think you and Mrs. Brown will be very excited about this.” That sort of peaked my interest a bit so I nodded for them to continue. “Essence Magazine wants to do a special on the Brown family.

“Wow. That’s major!” I was truly in awe. I knew my family something like this would come up eventually but it was still a surprise. “I’ll talk things over with my wife to see how she feels about it. I’m sure she’d be excited, I know I am!”

I couldn’t wait to get back home and tell Leeyah about this.

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kikkieabby · 6 years

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Bakugou and Fem Izuku in: Secret lover’s! Chapter 1- I love you!

Kikkie: Hi! A fanfic series for my hero academia! Because, why not, I thought this couple was cute. Plus, with only seeing a little too few clips, I can deeply say that Bakugou...is going to be fun to write.

So, thank you for taking time out of your life to read this

Summary: Izuku and Bakugou are dating, but in secret. Why, because Bakugou said so, and also another reason that I will think up soon. Enjoy!

“Where the fuck are you going Deku?” I asked the little bitch wearing that fucking mini skirt like she had legs to show off. I don’t know why, but she’s starting to look fat to me, and not in the way you think. “Hm? Oh, this?” She asked me before grabbing the side of her skirt. Lifting it up a bit, probably giving all the perverts behind her a show! I bet she’s wearing a thong too, fucking cunt! “Toru and Ochaco helped me get this. Apparently, I grew out of my uniform, as what Mina had told me. So we got a new one, turns out this is the only XL they had. Go figures!” Izuku tells me, in all honesty, she was right. And I know she was wearing a large because I have seen fat bitches wearing what she is wearing. The skirts are supposed to go around her bellybutton, which it did. Only to stop a few inches below her thighs, showing off her legs. And those fucking black thigh highs didn’t help in the least. And then the vest, sure it fitted her, but it didn’t make her large rack invisible like most of the girls here. My god, those things grew during the summer! Same goes for her ass! I can’t tell if that’s fat or muscle! “Well, it makes you look fat! Get rid of it!” I growled at her. As the Deku she is, her cheeks turn red before looking down at her uniform. I am guessing she felt a bit of shame because she presses her hand to her stomach before taking a seat. The next second later, those bubbling idiot friends of hers came running into the room. Squalling a shit, sounding like a dead horse trying to escape death. God, hurts my fucking ears! “I see someone’s annoyed.” Oh great, Eijiro here’s… “Very,” I responded. Maybe if I try hard enough to be mad he will go away. “I see the fangirls group is here. But why are they counseling Izuku? Did you say something to her?” “I told her that her new uniform makes her look fat.” “Dude!? No!” Eijiro nearly screamed. “That ass! Why would you tell her to cover up that ass! Dude, she’s like the hottest girl in the whole school!” “Your joking?” I asked in a calm manner. In reality, I was trying my best not to blow his fucking face off. How dare he say that to me about Izuku! Of course, I know she’s hot! Fucking looking at her! Tall, long pretty green hair, freckles that shine brighter than my explosions, and birthing hips! Fucking birthing hip just waiting to produce MY KIDS! That’s right, that fucking bitch shouldn’t be getting any other guys attention but me! The only guy who gets to check that ass out is me! Oh goddammit, now I have a boner!! “Class has started!” Ugh, the black-haired fuck shouted as he enters the class. As if today can’t get any worse! Okay, don’t think about Izuku! What’s that smell? Banana? Strawberry? Like Izuku perfume. Ugh…don’t…don’t think about…

“PRINCE!” What? My prince charming!” Izuku, that frizzy dress she always wore when we played. It was flowey but always wrinkled. It pissed me off, but what pissed me off more was that fucking Taira she wore. “My prince charming! My hero!” Izuku shouted. Waving her little wand in the air and shouting out weird sounds. She and I stood in the middle of the forest where we would play prince and princess. She sometimes would climb up a tree and pretend to be kidnapped and I would go save her. Today, was different. “Ugh, I hate this game! It's so boring!” I growled at her as I helped her down the tree. Once on the ground, she wipes pats the dust off her before saying: “Then why don’t I rescue you!” “Rescue me?” I asked. I don’t remember why, but that was the first time I started to feel anger towards her. “Yea, you know! Like how you rescue me since we will both be hero’s one day, we should train on saving each other.” “Are you calling me weak!?” “No, I-SHUT UP!” I shouted at her. Cutting her off mid-sentence so that shut that mouth of hers. “You’re the damsel in our relationship! Not the hero! You will never save me in any situation! You will never become a hero!” I shouted at her. Tears forming in her big eyes as her body trembles. She clasps her hands together and held them over her chest. She looked like she was trying not to cry, but she was failing. “But…I want to be a hero. Like…like…” “Oh, that stupid hero Toshinori Yagi!! Forget about him and stay a princess! Your weak, you won’t be able to fight!” I shouted. The next thing I remembered was grabbing that tiara she wears and breaking it. Making her run home crying to her mom. A second later her mom told my mom, which led to a beating of a lifetime, but hey, the bitch doesn’t hit hard.

“Bakugou.” “Bakugou?” “Bakugou!” Goddamit! Why the hell is Deku yelling in my ear!? Wait…why is it dark? Where is everybody? The fuck is going on here?! “Bakugou! You're awake!” Izuku with a smile on her face. Why the hell is she smiling, the world gone fucking black! “What the fuck?” I growled. “Oh, a villain attacked the school while you were sleeping. He set off this sleeping gas that knocked half the school out. Luckily, Shoto was able to keep the smoke from affecting all of us. Then our might hero principle swooped in and fought the bad guy! It was awesome!” “What are you saying?” “You and a bunch of other classmates have been sleeping the entire day. But don’t worry, you guys are in perfect condition.” “You let me sleep the entire fucking fight!?” “Well, I was sort of busy getting students out of the building while helping Shoto fight the villain's goons. Oh my gosh, Mina went behind one of them and kicked him in the balls.” “I WILL KICK YOU IN THE BALLS!!” I shouted at her…then it hits me. She doesn’t have any balls. “Why are you so mad?” Because you left me here to fight! Are you kidding me!? Fucking Deku, you could have gotten killed you, stupid bitch!” “Calm down.” “I AM NOT GOING TO FUCKING CALM DOWN! WHY ARE YOU SUCH A FUCKING DEKU!? YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT THAT CAN’T TAKE A GODDAM HINT! I FUCKING-SHUT UP!!! She shouted at me. Slamming her fists down onto my desk, a bright light of green electric engulfs the plastic wood before destroying. Her hands slump over her knees as her green locks fall down past her shoulders. Her body trembles as the room begin to fill with sniffling sounds. But ignoring that, did this bitch just destroy my desk? “Why…” She whimpers. Was this bitch actually crying? “What?” I growled. “Why do you hate me so much?” She cries before turning her head to the side to look at me. Tears and snot staining her face, she looked like a weeping angel with the moonlight shining onto her wetness. Wetness…see this is why I fucking hate fanfic writers! Ugh, crying stupid…ugh! Standing up quickly, I reached over to her shoulder then shook her a bit. If I exploded even a little, I would have hurt her, and I didn’t want that. Crying, she looks up to me with diamonds shining tears in her eyes. I haven’t seen her cry like this since…well, you know. “Tch, Deku,” I growled. God, why was she hot. “I don’t hate you. You annoy me, but I don’t hate you.” “Then why do you treat me so mean?” “I treat you mean because of the way you look.” “What?” “Not that way!” I growled. How do I say this without looking like a sexist pig? “Look, I…lov… I loo…I lovvvv….dammit!” Dammit! I feel like a fucking dumbass doing this shit! Why can’t I say it! It's just three stupid words! “I love you.” She tells me. I think my heart stopped for a moment there, it never happened before. Well, not like this, it happened before but for other reasons. “You…what?” I asked. “I love you! I have always loved you! Ever since we were kids, I have always loved you!” She started. Oh, you cannot be serious! “But then you got your powers (or Quirk, whatever!) and started to be mean. Then when we came here, you got even meaner…” “Yea…” Was all I could say at this point. She wasn’t wrong, I was an ass. I won’t lie, my anger can get the best of me and make me a crappy person. Will I ever change? Possibly! Will it be soon? Don’t bet on it. “All the girls started to talk to you. Flashing at you, getting the hots for you. So many pretty girls, I felt that I couldn’t compete against them.” She tells me. “But then we were put in the same class! Which made me so happy that I felt my heart nearly burst! I felt like I was given a second chance, so I studied hard. I worked out a lot with my sensei’s and friends, and I even gain the courage to stay here when everyone left.” “Wait, what?” What did she mean by that? “Oh, um, were the only ones here.” She says. “Everyone was scared of you, no one wanted to wake you up or even wait for you to wake up. So, everyone left.” “Why did you stay?” “Because I love you. And even though you mean sometimes, I know deep down in your heart, you love me too.” She tells me before getting on her tippy toes. The scent of strawberry fills my nose. Was the villain back already!? No, it was her! It was her perfume! And…

She’s kissing me! Holly shit, she’s kissing me! My heavenly father fuck! Her lips feel so good, god-dam! How are these virgin lips!? I feel them sticking to mine like glue or honey. Quickly, I hoist my hand up to the back of her head, holding it before getting down to work. With my other limp, I wrapped my arms around her waist, holding her close to me. I lean forward towards her a bit more, applying pressure onto her lips with my tongue. A soft moan escapes her lips. A tiny opening which allowed my tongue to seep into that warm moist mouth of hers. Her tiny tongue tries to escape mine, but like a snake about to attack its prey, I wrapped my tongue hers. Pulling it, feeling it, tasting it. It tries to escape but fails, only to give into the pleasure before indulging herself. When our lips separated, our tongues stayed together. Rubbing and tasting each other with no regret. Sadly, her toes got tired, forcing her to move downwards and lean against my chest. Both of us breathing deeply, trying to regain ourselves. As she lays against my chest, I couldn’t help but squeeze that big lump of meat in my hand. Looking down a bit, without realizing, I saw my hand was over her butt. “You got a big ass, when did this happen?” I asked my green haired princess. I could feel her blushing ear to ear even with a shirt on. “Mina…and I have been doing…a lot of workouts.” She moaned. Ugh, I think I have to take back what I said about Mina now. Because if she’s the reason Izuku has this, then by god I will buy her lunch for a year. “Has anyone ever touched you like this?” I asked. “Once…” She tells me. “Who?” I growled I wanted to take note so that I remember who to kill. “A stranger on the bus. He grabbed my butt once. But Shoto was there to help me by recording him, so I was fine in the end.” She…WHAT!? A pervert grabbed her and Shoto rescued my woman!? Yes, my fucking woman! I don’t give a fuck if I am a bigot at this point, this bitch is mine! Mine to hold, love and even breed! So fuck you, readers! “Tch! You're not going on the bus anymore, you got me!” “But, how will I get home?” “I will take you home!” I growled. “So stop asking questions and just smile for me!” “Uh…okay!”

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hopeymchope · 6 years

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Random thoughts about bad/dumb/good things that happen in the back nine episodes of ‘Darling in the Franxx’

This post is long, and it’s mostly me griping about how Darling in the Franxx failed to stick its landing. I’ve got a lot of bullet points about what annoyed me, as well as some points about what I still liked in the back half, and eventually I’m just like “yeah, fuck this.”

That’s the short version: You had a lot going for you but ultimately blew it really bad for me, so like... fuck this.

Damn right Mitsu-WAIT, I forgot when Mitsuru had this much emotion! WHO DIS?!

The long version is more complicated, though, and I feel like rambling/ranting on, so here it goes.

There is no way to stress enough that Zero-Two literally transforms into a giant part-human part-mech creature that Hiro literally rides inside of. She becomes a skyscraper-sized girl that you can climb inside the skull of, and EVERYBODY IS OKAY WITH THIS AND DELIGHTED BY IT. There is NOT a moment where Zorome cries “WHAT THE ACTUAL FUUUUUUUUCK?!?” when she appears, flying in space, at a mass so large she could easily swallow the whole team in one gulp. Nothing like that.

This is not adequately set up, but it IS understandable with some thought: I mean, we are told in a previous ep that the franxx are essentially just recreated, retrofitted klaxosaurs. We also have seen how klaxosaurs are part-organic, part-mechanical beings, and we are told by the Klaxo Princess they are, in fact, the new version of the organic klaxosapiens, now retrofitted for war. In addition, we know that Zero-Two is part Klaxosaur - a clone of the last klaxosapien. So you see how the idea that Zero-Two could somehow “retrofit” or “transition” into a giant cybernetic war mode similar to how the klaxosapiens somehow did the same thing... you could justify that! Once I thought it all through, it kinda worked. But none of this is laid out for you, and it comes off as laugh-out-loud ridiculous in the moment that it happens. Only later, when my brain was piecing the evidence together, did I get somewhere that made sense out of it.

The Nines remained bitterly loyal to Papa when we last see them in Episode 20, snapping at Squad 13 for not showing due respect. When they return in Episode 23, Nine Alpha is suddenly on the side of Squad 13. Because Papa turned out to be an alien, you see. But like... you’ve been fighting klaxosaurs and feeling extreme loyalty to Papa your entire lives up until like, yesterday, so seeing you suddenly join the pro-klaxo side of the war is perhaps too hard a turn. Granted, a lot of time passes off-screen during this period, but still it’s sort of “Hey it’s me, Alpha. Remember how I was never anything but a total asshole to you guys? Remember how I hated emotions and shit? Yeah I wanna help Hiro reunite with Zero Two now.” Um. Okay?

Mitsuru’s speech to Kokoro about how “I want to be with you not because I love you, but because I believe that I did love you once, and I don’t remember that feeling anymore, but I still believe it existed, and I want to respect it!” is literally the worst, least-romantic declaration of non-love I’ve ever heard in my life. The music swells romantically and Kokoro seemingly weeps out of joy over it. I prefer to think she’s crying because it’s so fucking awful. It is actively offensive to real emotions and logic

Remember when Mitsuru talked about he always wished he and Hiro could co-pilot a franxx together? Remember his debilitating rage at Hiro for forgetting their promise to become soldiers together? It really feels like we had a gay or bi character here, and that maybe we were setting something up for his character. but the entire fixation on Hiro is utterly ignored once he gets reduced to “Kokoro’s sperm donor.” I mean, jeez, “my homosexual fixation on Hiro has filled me with an incoherent rage” just gave me flashbacks to Juzo from Danganronpa 3, and that’s not good, but at least it was more personality than he ultimately got.

WHY are we left with the strong sense that Ikuno is dying of the accelerated aging (she is the only one who loses ALL color in her hair and the only one we last see in a hospital bed on an IV drip, so it’s pretty blatant) even though literally no one else in the squad is suffering from it anymore, supposedly thanks to HER research?!... I assume because she’s gay. After all, the extremely gay Nines were all killed off by a mysterious ailment due to a lack of “maintenance” so we might as well kill off Ikuno too, right?! BURY YOUR GAYS. And FUCK YOU.

Goro somehow gets together with Ichigo. We do not get to see how/whether he won he over. Given that the final episode includes multiple scenes of her really missing Hiro along with a scene of her not caring much that Goro is going to travel the world without her (repeatedly), it comes off as though Itchy settled for Goro because he was the best available penis. I AM NOT ENDEARED.

We are also told that Goro has “really changed’ since the beginning of the series. There is no evidence to back this statement up. In fact, he is acting exactly the same in this scene as he always has. Granted, he had a moment in the previous episode where he got pissed and punched Hiro, and that was a big change... but he apologized and it’s not discussed again, so um. Huh. The thing that seems to be a sign of his “change” is his desire to go out alone into the world in an act of self-sacrifice for the good of everyone. Which is LITERALLY THE GORO WE’VE ALWAYS KNOWN. File his change under “informed attributes.”

By the end of the series, Hiro is full-on turning more into a Klaxosapien than a human because... honestly, I’m not sure. It’s possible it’s because he’s been “plugged into” Zero-Two, but it seems like the process is mostly done by then, because he’s immediately able to live without food or water or sleep once he plugs in, and he already had his horns glow with rage in the ep previous to this. So I think he transformed due to the fact that one time, as a kid, he licked Zero-Two’s blood, and as a teen, he’s kissed her a bunch of times. Which is... pretty goddamn extreme. I mean, I know fluid transfer can be a powerful experience — just ask Sandra Bullock — but this is some real next-level shit.

We waited all series for shit to “get real” and someone in Squad 13 to die. It takes until the very last episode for it to happen, and — in a desperate bid to make us care about what’s happening — it’s the two characters who got the most development and who most people care about. The two leads. Which comes off as too little, too late for me to even feel it, seeing as how they’re only vaguely human or relatable by this point. But I AM weirdly bitter that they kept alive everyone else, even the many people we didn’t give much of a shit about (Zorome? Miku?), so that none of the battles in the series EVER had to have real consequences for our heroes. I hate to sound bloodthirsty, and yet....

Hey, speaking of Zorome, remember how him being exposed to the “adult” in the first half of the show made her get sick? Remember how she was also immediately fascinated by and kind to him and it made you wonder how that would affect the other adults? None of this goes anywhere, because the adults all get spirited away as souls to be part of the VIRM hive-mind, so whatever, they’re gone now.

Why are these people all standing around a statue and screaming at the sky and praying? Most of them don’t even know who this girl was. This doesn’t come off as “moving” so much as a terrifying parable about religious fanaticism in cult groups. You see a group of people screaming and praying at idols you don’t understand, and gradually, more and more people just copy the behavior without understanding it. *shiver*

Was there EVER a hint that the adults watching over the squad were friggin’ IMMORTAL?! Because I don’t think there was. I’d need to go way back into earlier episodes to be sure, though.

It’s not that the ENTIRE back half of the show is awful, really. There are some legitimately excellent moments.

Good Stuff

Right when we first come back after episode 15′s big midway point in the story, the subtle way that Zero-Two discovering the gray hair on Miku’s head was handled - during a warm, lighthearted scene to boot - really made it hit home.

The overt anger and defiance of Hiro in the face of “Papa” and APE really made me like him even more. He had some great moments there, including possibly the greatest episode-ending dialogue when he declared just how fucking DONE they all are with their so-called “Papa.”

Zorome’s inability to fully embrace the idea that “Papa” could be so wrong and bad was another good touch.

The big “backstory” episode served to make me really care for Dr. Franxx in a surprise late-game twist. He goes from being a shadowy sinister presence to becoming one of the more sympathetic characters... right before getting killed shortly thereafter.

The big promise scene between Zero-Two and Hiro, where they swear to always come for each other... that one really pulled at my heart.

Also, Hiro’s dedication to caring for the ailing, zombie-like Zero-Two was both devastating and touching. It’s one of the final bits that actually hits any kind of emotion for me in the series.

I actually didn’t mind the alien twist with the VIRM very much like so damn many people did. APE was long portrayed as this unknowable higher power that was clearly hiding something while simultaneously enforcing a 1984-esque obedience and loyalty... and there’s only so many places to go with such a setup, honestly. Much more shocking, to me, is how little is done to build up to/justify the true origin of the klaxosaurs.

But, well, yeah. Like most, I wound up feeling like DitF had a couple of really excellent characters in the lead, and then proceeded to go nowhere worthwhile once it got them to finally be together. Ultimately, they didn’t even get to grow up or have real sex or face the new world. They just get shuffled off into weirdness and death so we can have a bigger cycle of disappointment.

This one has a lot of themes that feel unexplored, and maybe further analysis would make it all gel together more comprehensibly. There is definitely a lot of effort put into thematic hints and worldbuilding in the first half, some of it done in a subtle background way that recalls my favorite aspects of The Future Diary — a favorite anime of mine that ALSO admittedly fails to adequately explain some parts of the world it builds, but it keeps most of its logic intact and is so emotionally engaging that I ultimately went along for the ride and was willing to explore the background justifications and themes later in order to fully grasp that world.

In comparison, I don’t really want to put in the effort to glean the underlying details of DitF. It didn’t leave me feeling like the writers put in the work to keep me invested, so why would I?

#ditf spoilers #darling in the franxx #darling in the franxx spoilers #ditf #griping

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tvd-spn-imagines · 7 years

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How You Get them to calm down (The Flash)

(Just quick FYI, there may be spoilers)

*(Also, this is just The Flash but would you guys be interested in a Green Arrow and Supergirl version??)*

The Flash:

Barry Allen/ The Flash:

It’s true that everybody makes mistakes, even in the worst situations. When it happens to Barry, especially on a mission he becomes so distraught he doesn’t want to do anything. He normally tries to brush it off while at work but when alone it’s so hard for him not to break down.

You found Barry once in STAR Labs, he was sitting down in a corner with his head buried in his hands, quietly weeping. He had come back from a mission after saving fourteen lives but three citizens were in critical condition and Barry blamed himself. When you found him you walked over and sat down beside him pulling him into your embrace.

He didn’t let the tears stop as you comforted him and got him to let it all out before reassuring him that it wasn’t his fault, he tried to save everyone and that’s all that matters. When he finally calmed down and stopped crying you walked home to your shared apartment and ordered five pizzas, you having three slices while you made sure Barry ate the rest, knowing he sometimes tried to skip eating in times like these. He curled up with his head on your lap as you gently stroked his hair until he fell asleep.

Cisco Ramon/ Vibe(s3 spoilers):

Cisco was angry at Barry for going back in time and changing the world, everyone's lives. He hated him because now his brother was dead, Caitlin had changed and according to Barry, apparently, you had too. You never blamed Barry for what he did, because if you were in his situation and had the chance to save your mother, you’d definitely take it like Barry had.

You reasoned your thoughts with Cisco, understanding that he was hurting but also reminding him that Barry did try to fix everything after he learned he shouldn’t have changed anything.

You helped get Cisco’s mind off it by asking him about his latest creations, suit updates and everything that he has done to help Team Flash. After a few weeks, Cisco finally took your words into consideration and talked to Barry, it wasn’t a usual conversation like old times but it was a start, and you were proud of him for it.

Caitlin Snow/ Killer Frost:

Caitlin got panicked easily over the smallest of things, and just you being there with her seemed to calm her immensely. You’d make sure she wasn’t working too hard and always went on her break instead of staying in and overworking herself.

She was grateful that you cared for her, and always seemed to know what to say in the worst situations. You were her rock.

Irish West:

Irish worried about her family a lot. Barry, Wally, her father, she couldn’t help but constantly think of the danger they could be in while out protecting the world.

Out of everyone, you were her safe haven. She could talk to you about anything and you always knew what to say and do in the situation to help calm her down, which was mostly staying with her so she wasn’t alone or the two of you taking your mind off what she was worrying about and ordering food and catching up on the latest shows you were watching.

Wally West/ Kid Flash:

Wally was so distraught when he found out he wasn’t fast enough to save an innocent person while battling a meta. When Barry told him the news of the young girls passing Wally grew quiet and left the room muttering how he didn’t want to screw anything else up.

Immediately you followed him, you waited for a moment before sitting beside him on the stairs in the empty room in StarLabs. “It’s my fault, I screwed up.”

You shook your head as you pulled him in for a hug and told him nothing but comforting words. You stayed there until Cisco came in alerting you of more meta business, you looked to Wally who nodded and got up, he wasn’t feeling great but he was definitely feeling better than before, thanks to you.

HR Wells:

All HR ever wanted was for people to talk and listen to him, to his ideas, to his troubles. You were that person. Whenever he needed it you were there, ready to listen and offer advice or words of your own to keep the conversation going so HR knew he was not alone and he was appreciated.

He was grateful for everything you helped him with, through the mental breakdowns and that one time you found him wanting to explode with emotions. Out of everything you could have done, all you did was listen, and that’s all he wanted.

Julian Albert:

Julian hid in his own personally built wall. He blocked his emotions from everyone and tried to distance himself from people, but in the end, it backfired when he felt the world around him crashing down on him.

Julian was hurting and thought that nobody cared, but that wasn’t the case. After finding out why he hid his emotions from everyone you were there and refused to leave his side until he let everything out, until he let the fear, anguish, and anger out of his system.

Julian told you things he never told anyone before, things he bottled up and hoped to forget as the time went on. He finally opened up and it was the best feeling ever, knowing he could turn to you, and the others of team Flash if he had a problem, finally, he didn’t feel alone.

Joe West:

Taking care of three kids can be a handful, especially when two of these kids are speedsters and the third is his only daughter who he loves and wants to constantly protect. When finding out that there was more than a chance of Iris dying within a few months, and that everybody knew this except him, he was more than angry, he felt betrayed.

He was lied to for weeks, at work he pretended like he didn’t care but when he was home where nobody else was around he let everything out. The thought of his daughter dying at the hands of a monster petrified him.

You decided to visit Joe when you heard Barry saying he was worried about him. You arrived having owned a key for emergencies and your heart broke at the sight. Joe sat on the ground leaning against the couch as photos scattered the floor around him, all of Iris.

After talking to him and helping him tidy up the photos you made the two of you some coffee and got him to call both Barry and Iris. He was afraid of them hating him from shutting them out but, you assured him that they were worried and would never hate him. You both went back to STARLabs and began to conduct a plan to save Iris, as a team.

*Hope you enjoy let me know if you want to see more like this! This was requested and the best way to clear my mind and hopefully help me write more!*

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professorsparklepants · 7 years

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Girlvek secret marriage au

(AKA: Falling in love with Gil Hotzfaller was the worst mistake Tarveka ever made).

So, here’s what I got:

Tarveka “Veka” Sturmvoraus, the eight year old second daughter of the Prince of Sturmhalten, begs, pleads, and weeps crocodile tears until her father sends her to Castle Wulfenbach to be educated with the future rulers of Europa. There she meets orphan-without-a-past Gil Hotzfaller, who quickly becomes her best friend, and when they break into the records vault looking for his family records, instead of staying behind to dig deeper, she runs after Gil to try and comfort him. Neither of them get caught.

Several years pass. Both of them break through remarkably early, likely around the same time, and they’re told by the Baron to keep Gil’s spark quiet (sensibly, Veka thinks, since a breakthrough this young in a boy without any family will draw the attention of a great deal of people eager to piss off the baron). Other than the Baron and Von Pinn, she’s the only person who knows about it, since she just happened to be in the fight place at the right time, which was next to Gil, where she always is.

(I haven’t decided when exactly Gil found out about his real parentage, but it’s somewhere around his breakthrough. Gil gets scared into keeping quiet, but his friendship with Veka never suffers because he knew she was his friend even before he was someone important).

Somewhere around 13 or 14 she and Gil start quietly dating. It’s an open secret among the kids at the school, who’ve known they were going to and up together for YEARS, but since Gil is a nobody and Veka is 50 families they know to keep quiet and save the two of them grief. Everything seems to be going great until their first big fight as a couple, because it’s a BAD one. Veka wants to look into Gil’s family more, because she remembers how miserable he was after the vault and knows something else is going on. Gil reacts badly and accuses her of not caring about anyone unless they’re useful to her. Veka snaps back that Gil has been anything but useful to her. Gil says he’s been useful enough keeping all of her secrets. Things deteriorate further from there; they both run off in a huff.

Gil mentions the fight (if not the context) to his father, because Veka looking into his past is something he knows the Baron doesn’t want. Klaus then proceeds to over-react and expel Veka from the school.... without telling Gil. Veka is under the impression that Gil went to the Baron and sold her out. Gil is under the impression that Veka threw a fit and decided to break up with him in the most definitive way possible. She refuses to look at him or say goodbye when she leaves.

Several bitter, miserable years pass.

After living with her father’s terrifying and ethically unsettling agenda for god knows how long, Tarveka finally able to escape and attend university in Paris. She’s not free, because the Mongfishes rubbed their dirty fingerprints all over the Order and there’s no way to escape their agenda, but she’s as good as she can get. Maybe while she’s gone she can formulate a plan to scrub the order down.

Mostly she ends up finding dead bodies at society parties, but that’s practically normal in her family. Developing a hobby of amateur detective work is not, but it’s significantly more fun, and she gets a good friendship with Colette Voltaire out of it, so everybody wins. She’s almost starting to enjoy herself when she runs into Gil again.

Their first meeting is not pleasant. Neither is the second. Or the third, or the fourth.... For two people who hate each other, Colette is fond of pointing out (to the both of them) they tend to meet a lot. Tarveka is fairly certain it’s because the universe hates her. It’s the only explanation.

After several vaguely humorous events where Gil ends up crashing one of Tarveka’s cases, or Veka ends up caught in Gil’s adventures, or their two seemingly unrelated genres of after-school activities turn out to have been entangled from the beginning, the two of them settle into a vitriolic partnership founded on mutual survival and Not Talking About It, With Anyone, Not Even If You Paid Me Colette. The turning point is when they get into a REALLY BAD fight where they drag up all the stuff that happened on the castle and find out that both of them have different stories and someone must be wrong here, and maybe it’s both of us.

I’m not sure on the specifics of how their relationship progresses from there but I’m sure it involves a lot of attempted murder and rampaging monsters and slow burn, and the two of them in various stages of undress due to action scene clothing damage and pulpy fan-service tropes. At one point Colette suggests that Gil knock Veka up so she can retire from politics in disgrace to become Paris’ greatest dressmaker and everyone chokes on their drinks in horror (Wooster) and embarrassment (Gil and Veka). Maybe there’s fake dating. Eventually they start REAL dating again, and Veka makes a lot of jokes about Gil being her kept man, and everything is (mostly) great.

This is where the secret marriage plot comes in.

Martellus comes to town for a few weeks and pays more attention to Tarveka than normal. Like, a weird amount of attention. He danced with her four times at the last ball they both went to, and even spending time “keeping Grandma company” hadn’t deterred him. She’d been forced to resort to throwing eligible young ladies with power hungry mothers at him to keep him away from her.

Meanwhile, Anevka’s letters start mentioning lab accidents at Sturmhalten--specifically, her lab. They never have lab accidents at home. The idea is ludicrous, which means someone is trying to kill Anevka and not even bothering to be subtle about it. Which in their family is a long list.

She doesn’t think to connect the two until she has a dream one night where she’s the sovereign Princess of Sturmhalten, happy and glowing, congratulated by her many powerful and influential guests who all adore her. Someone asks if she’s looking forward to the coronation, and she replies Only as much as my husband is! And an arm wraps around her waist and she leans into it as Tweedle kisses her cheek and calls her wife and she wakes up in a cold sweat.

She and Anevka are the only thing standing between Tweedle and incontestable rule of Europa. If either of them have sons, their claim will be better than Tweedle’s, unless they’re his sons. Anevka is dangerous and stubborn and would castrate him with a socket wrench if she knew he was even considering it, but everyone thought Veka was a pushover who did whatever her father told her because that was the price of surviving. Grandma hadn’t stopped Tweedle from dancing with her even though Veka knew she was the favorite grandchild, which meant either she was in on it or she was expecting Veka to solve her own problems, and if Grandma wasn’t openly supporting her then she had little chance of talking her father around, and she would have to marry Tweedle, and have his children, and let him touch her--

TWEEDLE CAN’T MARRY HER IF SHE’S ALREADY MARRIED TO SOMEBODY ELSE.

This is more of a ”panic at 3 am” plan than a Tarveka plan but when she wakes up (again) the next morning it seems like a good idea, because she’s actually still panicking. Gil spits out his coffee when she brings it up and then Colette spits out her tea when they ask her to be the witness.

In the future when asked, Gil’s defense for going through with this is 20% “I thought it was just technical and she would ask for an annulment later” and 80% “I didn’t actually believe it was really happening until we literally signing the marriage contract”. Tarveka’s is, besides the aforementioned panicking, “AT THE TIME Gil was the only person I trusted not to take advantage of me”. Colette, when asked, claims that a. they were clearly hopelessly in love, b. she knew that Tarveka was miserable at home and would be even more so if she ever broke up with Gil to get a political marriage, and c. the fallout was going to be HILARIOUS. (None of which are WRONG, per-say).

There’s a short honeymoon period until Gil realizes that like.... if they’re.... actually doing this.... he should probably like.... actually tell Veka who he is. So they have a serious talk about the trajectory of their relationship and how neither of them actually wants a divorce and at one point probably like, mush, and then he tells her. And she is SUPER PISSED. Especially since lying about your identity makes it a voidable marriage.

To quote Doc, who gave me permission to steal this piece of gold:

"Hey, I'm still the same Gil you know and love, right?" "Sentimentally, YES! Legally, NO!"

Like, this puts her in an amazing political position over the order and tbh most of Europa but she’s still SUPER PISSED because she married Gil specifically because she loves him and thought she could trust him and the fact that he was lying to her about this! For years! Even when they were kids! Fucks her up a little.

Right in the middle of this emotional shit show is when Tarveka finds out her sister is dying. She makes up with Gil, a little, when she’s leaving (and she has to leave, because even if Anevka was a menace and made her skin crawl she’s still her sister), and promises they’ll talk more if when she comes back.

THEN she finds out their father put Anevka into the summoning machine, and more panicking happens. Because her father put his DAUGHTER and HEIR into the summoning machine to get possessed by his EX-GIRLFRIEND and after he got over his hypocritical grief there was no proof he wouldn’t try it again with the spare.

I imagine that the extra years spent on Castle Wulfenbach gave Veka time and space to come to the same conclusions Tarvek gets to in canon when he finally has time away from his family--that no one deserves the sort of thing Lucrezia wanted to do to them. The difference here being that she got thrown back into it as a young teenage girl with the implication that as long as she was good, she’d be safe. This is proof that was a lie, and that she’s never been safe here at all, and maybe only survived through luck.

Clearly now the only way to make sure she survives long enough to heal Anevka is to cut her father and the Other out of the equation altogether. So... she contacts the Baron about the veritable army living underneath her town, armed with dozens of hive engines. As you do.

I think you guys can imagine how exactly that goes.

After everyone that needs killing’s been killed and everything that needs handling is being handled, the Baron tracks her down and demands to know why he shouldn’t just kill her immediately for treason and harboring Agents of the Other.

To which her response is “Because I’m your daughter-in-law.”

And that’s where things start getting interesting.

#i need a tag for this #secret marriage au #lectures #girl genius #why did i spend 2 hours on this rip #genderbending

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