#well sort of live blog
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Time Lords is bugs
#is that something?#dw shitpost#dw spoilers#doctor who#nuwhospgliveblog#well sort of live blog#more post-episode thoughts#nuwho#nuwho shitpost#shitpost
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get Apollo'd idiot @sheerunfilteredhubris
#[.art]#^ if the didascalia is unclear this is meant to be a portrait of sorts. Of my friend. Technically of the greek god too but same thing#Juno#<- goes in my tags soley in this way I don't have a clue of what else to put on here#with added closeups! This took me one afternoon and some. I think about four hours in total if I add up all the last-minute editing#it was going to have a more complex background but it ruined the constrast and the shapes got lost in it so I had to scrap that#alas I don't think this will work as a way to achieve endless youth but we can't /all/ turn art into devil deals#no I'm not going to stop making that joke. I think it's hilarious.#also my soundtrack for this was the Hozier youtube automated playlist. we are not escaping with our lives I fear /j#is it neoclassical or more baroque? The main inspiration was the first but the harsher contrast reminds me of the second#ah well. You can tell me that. I can't analyse my own art#my art#greek mythology#classical mythology#painting#apollo#<- i'm putting these tags back here so it doesn't show up in the search it's just for my blog organisation
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sculpted a strange shimmery two headed snail, speckled with wild flowers on it's shell~
#sculpture#snail#fantasy art#I have never sculpted or even drawn a snail before#so hopefully the anatomy is not incredibly off#(though if so.. I guess it could also just pass as further Strange Magical Mutations lol)#It doesn't show up as well in the photo but the shell has some irridescent eyeshadow on it so it kind of alternates a little warm#red and teal as you move it.#Made for an art contest on a game that I play lol (I wouldnt normally think to sculpt a snail on my own if it werent part of a#prompt) but I do kind of like the way it came out.. sort of..#Perhaps a real creature that exists in Nanyevimi (my worldbuilding setting) in some capacity then.. hrmm#also in relevance to this blog i DO STILL WANT TO finish the story with the little adventurer... goursh I have just had so much going on..#all of my little side projects like that have fallen away for so long. I really want his advneture to reach a tiny conclusion though#And shout out to that one person that always reblogged them and left nice comments in the tags also.. :'3#Poll Adventures.... not over... simply was on temporary evil hiatus due to Me Feeling Sick Constantly All Summer and so on and so forth#aughhh.. woe and agonyyy *dramatically drops to my knees in the middle of a rain storm like some tragic movie scene#kneeling into the cold earth as i cradle the half-living bodies of all of my half-finished creative projects in my arms*#ANYWAY... lol..... erm.. snail time
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sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:
thing that I already do
thing I have tried 10 times
thing I already do
thing that I don't have the money to do
thing I already do
thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail
thing that is impossible given my situation
thing that doesn't apply to me
thing that I already do
thing I have already tried
hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently
thing I have already done
#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things#out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever#all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever#or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc.#especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple#and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already#done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and#all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you.#who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3#my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster#talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo#I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache#or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop#e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all#sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef#t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of#way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I#think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i#gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!'#like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant#mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain#or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right#now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like#most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once#that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY#Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth
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#one piece#sanji#black leg sanji#everysanji#thriller bark#ch443#dont take this in like. any sort of serious way but i do sometimes think about how like#i could die suddenly and you guys wouldnt have any idea because i keep the queue filled up so much#as of queuing this post i have 118 posts ahead of it#i could die tomorrow and it would be mid-late february before the queue ran out#without any sort of notice or anything and all that would be left of me is.... well my blogs ig online#again i'm not planning on dying its just smth i think about with internet presences like#i will live on a little bit longer to you guys bc of the queue prolonging all these things#but in the end its all the same#anyway.... happy valentine's day or whatever? im not entirely sure when this will post like i said#118 posts ahead of this in the queue when i'm making this post its hard to think that far ahead
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hooray being on the internet makes me feel like shit again
#p#it's not even the content I consume that makes me feel like shit; it's the lack of dopamine from actual human interactions#it's an endless cycle; I log off discord and tumblr bc those are the only sites I use#then I get an actual physical itch inside my stomach to check my socials#and then I cave in do it and I feel great for a while#and then I stay online for days until I feel sad and weird#I need new friends fr#im tired of my current ones#two guys who are well. teenage guys and act exactly how u would expect#a female friend I was kinda sort of in love with for a significant amount of time and now I'm just mad at bc she doesn't seem to value me#and talia. who is fucking awesome but lives across the world#anyways I'm just gonna let my blog run on queue rn for a while
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His sprite is so CUTE. Getian loml
#Had today off from work so I binged the whole story today#Sort of live-blogged it on Discord too#me and one of my friends (who doesn’t play but likes Getian too) were on the Getian defense squad the whole time#HE DID NOTHING WRONG. AND LIKE ACTUALLY#he was just trying to help but got met with violence poor boy. I will fight them for you#and they were so mean to him too. ‘Oh you’re so sweet and kind. Unlike GETIAN whos so RUDE’#And then Getian’s there like. Being nothing but sweet. He’s just bad at talking stop being so mean#he’s just like me fr in that regard lmaooo#anyway. Fun event#felt good when Getian was proven right#Especially since I didn’t really like Jiu Niangzi ngl. She’s kinda annoying#ANYWAY#his banner can’t come soon enough I need himmmm#I’ve been saving for this#well and MedPoc too#but like AHHHHHHHH#oh also speaking of MedPoc#new standard rateup should be announced in a couple days#please please please please please please be MedPoc#anyway that’s all. Just have a lot of Getian feelings tonight#I love him so much it’s unreal. I’ll never recover from the emotional damage of loving him#Maddiepost
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a concept: Lockwood was as jealous of the Skull as Lucy was of Holly during The Hollow Boy
#lockwood and co#lockwood & co#locklyle#anthony lockwood#lucy carlyle#this is not actually a lockwood and co blog#I say as I rush to post something after once again deciding to reread#but anyway perhaps it's something a bit more complex than jealousy#a cocktail of emotions at knowing lucy was getting drawn more toward the side of the dead than the living#there's that added layer of the tv series in that in the first season lucy helps him with his recklessness#and now she's the one engaging in that sort of behavior in THB#but the thing is the nature of their recklessness if different in that#lockwood's is reckless because of his unresolved issues#while lucy becomes reckless because she wants to help the dead she can speak to#which again must complicate things for lockwood#because those that lucy sees as victims#lockwood just sees as evil causes of his sister's death#their talents play into this to#because lucy can hear them she can empathize with them#because lockwood doesn't hear them well or at and because of his exceptional sight#he only sees the ugliest of the Visitors and it's easy for him to forget they were once alive#so there's that 'jealousy' that lucy is spending more on more time on the entities who killed his sister#which causes her to put her own life in more danger as a result#resulting in lockwood getting angrier at her especially when he thinks she's missing the point by focusing on holly#and it's just a never ending cycle of them being angry at each other without fully understanding the other person's reasons#and irony of ironies#when (not if) we get a season 2#lockwood will feel the full force of what lucy felt this season because of his jump of a cliff tendencies#books#tv
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they should let you include tumblr mutuals as references on resumes
#the insane girlies that live inside my phone can attest to my photo and video editing skills right#or lack thereof no shhhhhh i'm great at those things right#but i sure do have experience alright! just don't ask me to show anyone#like for real i am very experienced in all sorts of photo editing apps#and i think i've conquered imovie by now#the thing is like. uuuuh well you see the reason i'm involved in those things is because i run a tumblr fandom blog...#i post stupid memes...#please don't ask to see my work#just trust me bro#peach rambles
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I have a longing to be understood more than anything else i think
#someone very recently acknowledged something that usually goes unseen and it wasn't even that great of an acknowledgement but ive just been#staring at the messages every once in a while. its great. not really i sort of feel like a real weirdo#im very lonely. i cant say why but let it be known that i am very lonely#ok i have a question to those who lie their eyes upon this post: tell me what you know about me please?#so much lies in my social perception and i am just. not being perceived. at all. darn#i have a lot to cry about but morally i dont think i should-- specifics would mean being mean to the people i love#talking to anyone anymore just makes me feel horrible. doing anything anymore makes me feel horrible..tmbg has my back though ill live for#another.week or a few. and then my birthday will happen and rhen um#.Well. it sucks that sucks man. i dont want to disclose my age but to elaborate on why ACTUALLY HOLD ON#the thing i am about to say is not true; it is a metaphorical thing: it is my 21st birthday soon.#i decided that i wouldnt live past this age around 5 years ago and the only reason ive lived five years is being killed this year. i dont#think every thing ive been desperately clinging on to for the past 2 (?) years can keep me alive past then..i think im going to die. i have#to#NO MORE BEING A DOWNER#fox (vulpes vulpes) on the Internet for the first time#okay maybe a little more..i dont know who im talking to in this post. my friends do not read my tumblr and. i dont know anyone else.really.#uh#I'm listen to tmbg right now i love them#hey reader; i can only think of 3 people who see enough about me to check my blog. so i have separate questions for the each of you.#one of you likes (liked? school came in and i couldnt see your blog much past then; idk if its changed) tmbg. what do you think of The Else?#and uh you there... the guyyy. Google john flansburgh..i dont have a reason to this one ive just not been able to stop thinking about askin#you what you think of him.#um third person..... um#okay theres nothing iecan ask. i do want to apologize to you though: im sorry.#iThis is bullshit#im gonna delete this soon#Um also sorry if my wording here is. really wack. i tend to do that#i dont think anyones going to see this as is always#i think i just like talking to the hypothetical beast. yeah
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ok this is gonna sound wild. BUT. Me and my buddy @honeycomb-ferret are attempting to start up a clangen universe vaguely based on cults and evangelical religion, each clan being a different denomination of sorts. Very religious trauma/how growing up under different religions raises many types of different people type framework on a clangen blog. Rn I have it set as four clans but as little as three and as many as can border one another is fine, I love working with others and sharing universes and creativity
I also want to make it clear I’m not asking for free art. It would be your clangen blog and your cats and game and final decision on everything, I’m just looking to work with others on a creative project because I love bouncing ideas off others and sharing worlds with people. And if any of that sounds interesting to you hmu!!! Tags message whatever, just lmk if you’re interested!
#My clan is Pineclan. They live in Appalachia esque pine woods and are extremely evangelical!#Cyrus has Spiderclan and they’re very prophecy based. Demanding direct word from starclan(ie omens prophecies etc) to make any decisions#The leader cannot act starclans will. Only starclan#Also I was originally going on tree names but spider is different probably because they look down on those /other/ guys#My other main idea for one is hollyclan. Who puts a lot more value into formerly living cats as patrons in a sort of old catholic way#Or even like. Greek mythology esque perhaps. Idk! I’m not doing two so whoever takes that one can decide where to go with it!#And from that point we can just keep making stuff up#Also just btw I’m 20 and Cyrus is 18. If that matters to anyone#But beginner artists/writers/storytellers completely welcome on my end!!!#Little sticker that says ‘plays well with others’ on a little dog vest I’m theoretically wearing#ANYWAY. Yeah please lmk if interested!!#warriors#warrior cats#clangen project#warriors project#warrior cats ocs#clangen blog#clan generator#open to all#open to mutuals#warrior cats au#(kind of? Are fan clans an alternate universe technically?)
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my 18 yr old cousin dying of an unexpected fentanyl overdose and other things to. process
#tw death#tw overdose#well is this appropriate for a blog I DON'T KNOW i don't know how to process it ANYWAY#not someone i know super well because we don't live on the same island anymore#by her mom and my mom are incredibly close and i was sort of raised as a sibling to her older brother when i was really little so#it's a lot to process as a death in the family#just stuff that happened over the weekend in the stress run up to christmas break ANYWAY
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#see my blog was never intended to be . like . seen by people? thats why its so gross#i tag Nothing. i only tag what i want to tag. i still have the mindset of what i used to be *checks watch* 9 months ago? i think?#i had under 100 followers most if not all being friends and mutuals#and then i made the mistake of posting art. sigh#this still carries over to the fact id Like to move blogs because this ones gotten. way too big#lesson learned for anyone on tumglblr: if you post anything like art or fanfic MAKE IT A SIDE BLOG!!!!!!!!!!!!!#do NOT do what i did. not the main blog. mistake#i used to make sideblogs everytime i got a new main interest but when i got into toh i stopped. idk why. but im stuck here now#if i DO move blogs i'll post about it. it'll prob be a quieter move but yeah it'll happen#im just procrastinating cus all my junk is already HERE#so like. why move. yknow?#i do genuinely love & appreciate the support. people have been very kind to me#i appreciate it a lot#i also just know from experience i am not someone that should have any sort of following on anything. i take it horribly#like. i used to be an active twitter artist for a year and that was HORRIBLE. ppl didnt just want art they wanted my opinions and my biases#i couldnt breath without 5 people asking me things#horrible life to live lol i like tumblr more#i started on tumblr and i moved back. im glad#anywhoo enough rambling i guess. if i move ill let people know! if i dont. well youll know cus im still here#ugh if i move i have to reblock my tags n people blaaaaugh#okey ill talk to you people later
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amity, during an astarion romance, is eventually going to reach a point where they're being more genuine (or, well, he's being more genuine; amity has been pretty genuine this whole time) and he makes a complimentary remark abt her offhandedly and she's like "haha yeah. you remember you don't have to do that anymore right"
"do... what?" he asks
"you know," she says, "pretend i'm..." she waves a hand in the air, vaguely gesturing to herself. "...nice to look at. you don't have to do that anymore. it's okay."
and no matter what he says, he's. not going to convince her otherwise. not tonight. not tomorrow. not for a long time.
the most she can concede the point is to say that it's kind of him to say so. but she still doesn't think it's true, even a bit
amity's childhood fucked up her self-image BAD. children can be cruel. the patriar are, as a rule, quite cruel and callous. and patriar children?? woof. awful. and she is the tiefling bastard child of a new money noble -- one who got that money through merchant work, how gauche. so she was subsequently on the receiving end of... a substantial amount of unkindness. general distrust, at best, from those who weren't outwardly cruel, but quite a bit of outright cruelty
sorcerers, of course, do not learn their spells the traditional way, but more through desire. and amity learned the disguise self spell early, born out of an intense and desperate desire to Be Literally Anyone Else.
she has learned at this point in time that she has qualities that others may appreciate -- which was a hard-fought battle in and of itself, and is still a relatively recent revelation for her. but those qualities are still tied to what she does. her capacity to be kind, her ability to be helpful.
but her appearance? hahahahaha fuck no
#amity has a little round scar on her left shoulder#from where she tussled with a kid who jammed a stick there hard enough for the resulting wound's scar to still be visible two decades later#why? something about being some uppity demonspawn#which she took offense to. because demins have nothing to do with her.#(her mother is a devil which is VERY DIFFERENT. none of these kids know anything about that. they just made guesses.)#she had one (1) friend her own age as a kid#and he had to be extra pushy to convince her that they really were friends and he wasn't teasing her#and then he fucking DIED#and her caravan route was the one that was SUPPOSED to fix it. those healers were SUPPOSED to find out what illness was plaguing the town#but they weren't fast enough to sort it out before people died. + even tho she was a kid at the time. she still felt like it was Her Fault#the parents were. not coping with their grief well. and amity came bounding up to them to ask where teo was so they could play#and they... displaced some of that grief onto her. lashed out.#which cemented her guilt and the feeling it was her fault#maybe she slowed the caravan down and he would've lived if they'd been faster... maybe she jinxed them and the illnesses are her fault...#maybe she is an ill omen. a burden.#amity tag#bg3 blogging
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I. See I’m gonna be Extremely Normal about this podcast huh
#not in the All Consuming sense like dqxi or a3 but#chel liveblogs tma#well not CURRENTLY live-blogging but for sorting purposes
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obsessed with your mitch marner obsession bc he lives in my area and whenever i see ppl post about him i think about how his car got stolen while he was at the movie theatre near my house and it was our biggest toronto news story for a few days lol
you LIVE NEAR HIM???? IM YELLINNNNNG. it’s so wild to me to conceptualize being near these ppl……. toronto…… but YEAH, i heard about that carjacking story right when i got into the leafs. i’m pretty sure it happened right after they lost in the first round again which………… how bad of a summer can you have jfc. but anywya thNK YOU FOR THIS INFO, it made me ????? at my screen for like 10 mins
#easks#cannot believe ppl know or follow my blog and live in all sorts of places like#anyway all of that to say im jEALOSU. id love to go back to toronto again#only got to see it for like a day at the very start of covid shutdowns rip#i wihs i lived in a place that had any crazy stories or people attached thats so wild#HOPE UR WELL AND HAPPY THERE.. if u ever catch mitch on the streets pls blow him a kiss from me
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