#what the fuck is wrong with healthcare specialists

[90frogsinatrenchcoat]

*goes on a rampage about the therac-25 and how fucked it was that no one was paying attention to that shit*

[tj-crochets]

Turns out it was not an error at the MRI facility, my insurance (which is literally the best insurance available in my area as an individual) just won't cover it* That is incredibly frustrating, both because what's the damn point of paying so much for health insurance if it doesn't cover testing, and because I get so much stuff from the insurance company about how they support preventative testing and care but when it's time to pay out they won't put their money where their mouth is. *technically they are "covering" it in that it was approved and the total cost will only be what they've negotiated with the MRI provider, but the insurance company isn't covering any of that cost. At all. None of it.

[bumblebeerror]

Don’t get me wrong man, Kamala Harris being an actual politician who knows what the fuck is going on is my preferred president to the Cheeto who wants to make it legal for him to be king, but CHRIST if every news site doesn’t sound like a tiktok audio of the most annoying resident of San Francisco, California.

Like my guy she is not girlbossing. Her running mate was EIGHTY YEARS OLD and decided probably people would like someone else because the dem docket is hemorrhaging votes because everybody’s retired grandpa is showing up to the polls and fuckijg nobody else because they all believe in the glorious revolution and fuck them poor / disabled folks am I right.

She’s not joining the gays, she is an ex cop. She’s not girlbossing, she was literally just handed the presidential candidacy by Joe. Like I love a good shattered glass ceiling too but are you fucking kidding me. She is 59 years old my guy she does not give a FUCK about gay Twitter.

Would it actually kill journalists to write like they don’t have a checklist of new memes to reference every article they write. My guy please just objectively report the news I don’t want to hear about brat summer.

This feels so bah humbug but every article I’ve read looks like a fucking satire piece I would read on this godforsaken webbed site but damn at least it would be satire! They actually mean it on news sites! Her being a woman doesn’t magically make her better at being president - it’s the fact that she isn’t Donald Trump, the guy currently trying to solidify that crime doesn’t count if you’re america’s specialist little boy at the time.

Like yea! She’ll be better than him! That’s not a high fucking bar my guy. We are like 3 inches off the ground with her while trump is subterranean.

Unironically, im glad Biden dropped out. I think it helps to set a precedent that this country doesn’t need yet more tired old men running it. But also don’t get fucking starry-eyed over her being a woman - she ran with Biden for a reason. You still have to stay on her ass about Palestine and reinstating Roe V Wade and protecting gay marriage and trans healthcare. She is not automatically on our side just because she’s a woman.

[aguineapigcouldntdothis]

my fuckin lab orders have basic and easily fixable (on my doctor's end) information abt me wrong! they spell my last name wrong which is the least bad bc that happens all the time and i know how to deal with it. they also got my weight extremely wrong. it was almost 100 lbs off. i know that was a typo but do they not check what they type?? the worst is that they said i dont have insurance even though i very much do and i keep asking them to update my insurance info to be accurate. my insurance isnt applicable when i go to my primary care doctor bc that's "free" care paid for by my tuition money. it is very important that my insurance info is updated for when i see specialist doctors and thankfully i keep documentation of everything bc i get scared any scrap of paper i throw out will save my life someday.

luckily all this shit is pretty easy to fix. i can drive down to get my labs done and bring all my little cards and documents so my info gets fixed. its not far away and thats actually exactly what im gonna do as soon as i get an appointment. which i dont think will be hard they're pretty good with wait times (at least for America). but like what if i wasnt!! im super lucky that i have a working car, specialists less than an hour away, a primary care doctor thats close enough for me to walk to, and some free healthcare! if i didnt have those privileges id be so, so much more pissed that they didn't even give a fuck to check if my info was right.

[mydemonsdrivealimo]

1, 9, 10 :) [sitting SO cutely]

1. the character everyone gets wrong

okay since im NOT allowed to say bryce (bc yeah okay i def would. literally he is a traumatized angst ridden little fuck and it will NOT all be fixed w a kiss on the cheek. but anyway) i have a few i could say. ethan for one bc he fucking sucks and everyone is wrong about him but mc ofc. but also AURORA. HELLO. she is literally the best and funniest mf in the whole series. her and jensen are besties. she is just a private person and thats SO real of her. like the way id love to do a character deep dive analysis bc on one hand shes grateful to her aunt bc healthcare is a hard world to get into and she knows shes faced hatred as a successful black woman in healthcare but also she knows she has more than that to look forward to. and can make it in a career on her own. but also there was absolutely some fear there bc she didnt want to crash and burn and not be able to make it. so like,, ofc she stuck around. ofc she entertained harpers nosiness. she didnt know what she was doing and sure she was kinda grumpy but she had a right to be!!

9. worst part of canon

ethan ramsey (dont fucking argue with me youre wrong)

10. worst part of fanon

oh you wanna get FUCKED up i literally hate it here. i have so many things to say here (fanon bryce, fanon sienna, fanon jackie, fanon any women of color, fanon ETHAN). but the one that gets me every fucking time. makes me wanna rip somebodys hair out. is the fact that people think its cool and fine to ignore book three.

not for the reasons you think though.

yes, there were ooc parts for everyone, and overall the quality and story was not consistent w the rest of the books. BUT. when people DO want to include it? SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET THEM. ETHAN ROMANCERS SHUT UP. just bc he was not your perfect specialist boy that whole book does not mean others CANT include the literal sexual harassment in their hc. any time people want to include the shit that HAPPENED IN CANON there is always some assface whos like "well book three didnt even happen" SHUT THE FUCK UP IT LITERALLY DID??? IF I WANT ETHAN TO GET FIRED FOR SEXUAL HARASSMENT BC OF A CANON EVENT THEN YEAH. I SHOULD BE ABLE TO. BC IT FUCKING HAPPENED IN CANON.

[sweetdreamspootypie]

🙃

I'm flying out tomorrow

Had a good night tonight

But

Vent / processing / just capturing some of the stuff I've been thinking about

It's so strange how different my worldview is because I'm a Covid nurse

Or maybe everyone else is insane

Who is to say

TW car accident, child injury

Managed to go see the last set of cousins tonight

My aunt was like

" oh yeah last few days I've been really sick

Had a really bad flu

Still coughing actually

But we don't believe in taking to our beds for just a flu lol"

And my cousin mentioned she doesn't know when the last time she took a RAT test was. Didn't even recognize the name. Said "oh yeah that's kind of outdated"

And NOBODY I've talked to has even been aware that there are still Covid booster vaccines happening and relevant?

They only ever had the initial course of 3 or 4 and then stopped? Didn't even know that further boosters are a thing at all?

and cousin told me that you don't take time off work for Covid here because it's not considered life threatening anymore

What the fuck is wrong with england

Why would you invite guests over if you actively have the flu?

Fuck man

Like it was actually a pretty good evening and it will probably be fine

But it's just so weird seeing the increasing divide in basic values

Like yeah I value hard work and discipline and etc etc and I want to get better at it

But how do these people value self care so little?

Idk I'm just hyper aware of it as well bc of my family's thing with chronic fatigue syndrome and how precarious wellbeing is

But also stuff like

Hard work is "being responsible" because idk doing your part at work on the project or whatever

But in my line of work

If I don't rest

If I don't eat or take my breaks or I haven't been sleeping well or burn out

Then I cannot provide the healthcare to others that is needed

I've got such vivid visceral memories of standing there as I'm realizing I need to hit the medical emergency big red button, at times when I'm over tired and not feeling my best self

Feeling my words and thoughts running like treacle and just being so aware of oh shit I'm not actually up for being responsible for this right now actually

And when I'm in that state and the adrenaline hits, it just makes it worse

I can feel my heart pounding in my ears and my dehydration headache and having to muster ok I have to be reassuring and communicative and make sure I'm dexterous enough to manage a complex situation

And if I can't manage it, people get hurt

And there's a very real risk that someone gets closer to death than they needed to, or would have if I had been on the ball and my best self

The other day, on Monday

I had a coffee at 12 noon

It was a really nice rich mocha from a chocolate specialist

I'm not accustomed to caffeine any more these days, so I was awake until 4am Monday night

On Tuesday night, despite being tired, I was also awake til 3am because of the disturbance to my sleep schedule it caused

On Wednesday, I was feeling gross from the sleep disturbance. I went to my room and tried to take an afternoon nap

At 4pm on Wednesday, there was a car accident outside of our house. A car hit a 3 year old child crossing the road with his mother.

My dad came to get me because I'm a nurse and that's my job.

When he came in I was in a groggy half asleep haze

I had my shoes on and was out the door but was still carrying a head of groggy haze

The kid was fine

Someone else was checking him out, asking all the right questions

And within a couple of minutes an ambulance arrived, and got to do a further assessment

It looked like the child had a bit of a bumped knee, probably from where he fell, but was otherwise just fine

Mum with him was being a champion at visibly keeping it together until tonight after the kids are put to bed, when she'll fall apart

I was able to be there to see that it was under control and looked on until the ambulance arrived

But I was so aware that I wouldn't able to clearly speak. Wouldn't be able to project calming competence with even just the simple fact of introducing myself as a health worker available if needed

Everything was fine

But if it hadn't been

I would not have been able to fulfil my role

Because I hadn't taken proper care of myself

I'm going to remember my guilt over one badly planned coffee I had on Monday, for years

Because my job is to be the one who knows how to make it alright when everything is wrong

Why the fuck can't other people do the simple things like isolate if sick

And not expose illness to people going back to the home of their 89 year old grandmother

I don't want to live to work

I want to live well

And wellness and happiness are important values and resources

And not contradictory with working hard to make progress on goals

People need to learn to rest

I didn't realize how bad it was

[that-ineffable-devil]

Sorry to rant on what is clearly mostly a fandom account, but I just had a really invalidating experience and I don't have anyone to rant to.

I was supposed to have a cyst operated on today, minor thing. Thankfully, the cyst was gone. However, the surgeon decided that since he wasn't operating, he needed to give me his opinions.

Apparently, all the treatment I've ever received from anyone else has been wrong and the worst thing that could have happened to me.

Apparently, he's also a MLM shill for some sort of "hormone optimization" and anti-science-based medicine business.

Apparently, this particular surgeon is a hormone specialist.

Apparently, he's also anti-trans.

Because apparently, he "doesn't do transitioning" because "you can throw as much estrogen at a 'natural' boy as you want, but he won't have enough receptors to make a difference and he'll always be stronger than a 'natural' girl and it just won't be fair."

First of all, I didn't ask him about transitioning. I've got healthcare for that. Second of all, I didn't ask for his opinion on transitioning. Third of all, his science is ABSOLUTELY fucked if he thinks that argument bears ANY weight under scrutiny.

So, after invalidating my existence and the existence of all trans people, he had the audacity to say that now that I'm an established patient, I can come back any time.

Sir, the minute you referred to western medicine as poison, the minute you told me that "in 2013 God blessed me with the ability to change my medical practice and focus on hormone optimization which is why you don't see 15 patients out in the waiting room behind you" (sus AF), and then backed up your prejudice with outdated pseudoscience, I decided I had already given you too much of my time and money.

I haven't had to go to the doctor much since I started transitioning. I know this is the first of many such negative experiences. And this was mild, very mild.

But I still wanted to punch him in his bigoted face.

[nokingsonlyfooles]

Yeeting this into the void...

Half vent, half self-expression and the third half is so my few readers followers know what's up with me. But my brain is not a nice place. Tread carefully.

My brain is low-key trying to kill my lately. I don't know how much of this is meds/health issues and how much just stress. My thyroid and estrogen are fighting and that really hurts. I'm doing what I can to mitigate it, but the bottom line is, I don't have anything that works AND is tolerable at an effective dose.

Wednesday, I'm going to the endocrinologist. I have never been to one, despite having hormonal issues my whole life. The only reason I got this referral is my spouse came with me and demanded it on my behalf, and I think my family doctor is borderline senile. I have no idea what that man has told this new doctor who is holding my life in their hands. I've been waiting for this appointment for months. This was the earliest I could get in.

I have issues with at least two hormones and I would hope that the hormone specialist can deal with both, but estrogen - ha ha, that little scamp! - is gendered. I'm so scared that (after I get told to lose weight) I'm gonna hear, "Sorry! We'll have to let the lady doctor who specializes in lady parts deal with your lady hormone, you lady, you."

These two things interact, you see, and I've had trouble absorbing both. I need someone who can deal with that, otherwise I'm going to be playing a three physician game of telephone, where instead of talking to each other, they make ME explain everything - even though they're supposed to have all they need on the computer. It's... I don't have the energy to keep doing that and it's super ineffective.

I don't have anything sexy or cool or simple wrong with me. I didn't even get Agent Orange dumped on me, that happened to my dad and I can't prove it's affecting me. Even though I have never been okay. Ever.

I can't hug people or lean over a table without cringing, 'cos my breast pain goes off at random depending how you hit 'em. Nobody cares. I mean, the love of my life cares, but nobody who is gatekeeping my healthcare cares. It's been this way for years. The gynecologists want me to express my pain in a way that makes sense to them, "hot flashes and night sweats." If it's not that, why would estrogen help? But it does. I've been on more and different versions of it and that helped, and even what I have now is helping. The trouble is, I can't stay on it because of the side effects. The goddamn thyroid hormones help it too! But so far nobody is equipped to do anything with this information. I have to craft a lie like a crow bending a wire into the perfect shape to get a cheeto out of a tube.

I'm in a new place with all new people and I don't know how to operate them. I really don't know how to operate that family doctor, he forgets everything about me as soon as I leave the room. I'm gonna lead with the truth again - unless something goes south real fast - but I don't know what I'll get.

I'm haunted by the suspicion that I'm unfixable. Not just that I need something I'm not getting, but there is no thing. There is no cheeto in the tube. This'll just be my life. Not only will I be sick, but I'll have people treating me like I'm fine, and I'll be expected to act fine. Ha-ha, that's the trouble when you don't look disabled, everyone expects you to act that way too!

Even if I do get better, finally... I'm going to be mad. I am going to be really mad. I rested my shoulder for a week out of desperation - it's been a mess for over a year - and it feels better. It still locks up and hurts if I push it, but I am learning to rest it when it needs a rest. NOBODY told me to rest it, it was always various permutations of working it harder. I am so fucking ANGRY that "a rest" was never on the table for some reason. I had to be in constant pain for going on two years and then come up with a way to help myself. This small level of relief I'm feeling was KEPT from me.

I don't know if even this will last. I don't know if I'm gonna find out typing and drawing is bad for me and I need to limit one of the only things that makes my life worth living.

I've fallen into some very dark holes this last week, and there will be more. Self-harm is always gonna be something that occurs to me, whether to end the pain or just to make my outsides look as screwed up as my insides so I'll be left alone. It is ground into my bones that nobody is going to help me, so that's really all I want when it's very bad, to be left alone. (I've mentioned sometimes I sound like an unholy union of Milo and Mordecai, that's because I am!)

I'm hanging on and trying to be okay. It's just fragile. I keep crashing. It's not that I'm faking being happy, it's that I'm apt to very suddenly not feel that way anymore. Happy is like paint with too much thinner in it. I can layer on a little more, but the base coat keeps leaking through. I'm scared. And I feel so small and dumb and petty to be scared and not wanting to go on when I've been so lucky and have so much. I always find a reason to keep going. I just worry (and I know my spouse does too) that one time I won't.

I need that support system, so I'm going to keep trying to be social too, but it's hard. Web 1.0 is dead and you can't just talk to people on the internet anymore. Best I can do is talk to the internet in general and worry the few people close enough to actually care.

I'm sorry. I'm tryin' to stay safe. It's just precarious right now. This is gonna be a rough week, no matter how it shakes out. I'll end up with new meds, and no idea what they'll do to me.

Respect to Our Emily, but my hope isn't light enough for feathers. It's heavy like lead, that's why I can't always hold on to it.

Nevertheless, I've nothing to do but keep tryin' to get that cheeto out of the tube. Rejoice, rejoice, we have no choice, but to soldier on...

(Well, as long as the shoulder holds up, I can write and art to distract myself. I'm sure I'll get Erik out of that hotel room soon.)

[semiotomatics]

clouds' healthcare journey, pt. 2

so for anyone who remembers the post I made recently abt me chronicling my healthcare journey (which I ended up deleting in a fit of utter rage and despair a couple days ago, you'll understand why shortly), you'll be pleased to know I finally managed to get an appt at a local clinic on wednesday. if you wanna hear how it went, it's below the cut:

so I spent literally hours beforehand going over my symptoms, their triggers, the exact nature and severity of the pain they put me in, laying it all out on a timeline and rehearsing how I would explain it so that the dr would actually listen to me. I knew exactly what I wanted to ask/demand and what I wanted them to provide. I was shaking, I was so terrified, but I was also the tiniest bit hopeful. I felt so much more prepared than any other time I'd gone to see someone, I figured I had at least a chance of getting somewhere this time.

nope. I don't know that I've ever met a more dismissive, less sympathetic dr. I started out explaining about my recent injury and he immediately cut me off and asked if it was a work injury or not, and if so, if I reported it. I got flustered explaining that the injury was only part of the problem, that this has been a chronic issue for years, and he was like "oh, well you can only claim workers comp if it's a new injury". that's not?? what I asked?? but okay.

I tried to explain my situation but he barely let me get a word in. I mentioned I had pain in my lower back potentially caused by my scoliosis and he had me stand up and do a ROM test, then he did the scoliosis-check-by-feel and was like "who diagnosed you with it" and I was like "I have x-rays" and he was like "well it's very mild, also your ROM is fine" and I was like OKAY, ALSO NOT THE POINT OF MY VISIT.

so at this point I was getting v upset and flustered and thrown off track. we sit back down and he starts explaining how "back/foot pain is very normal, you're young, you need to exercise to prevent it" and starts talking abt physio. I cut him off and say "I've tried physio, it didn't help" which is an oversimplification tbf but I didn't want him to just refer me to physio and call it a day. then he explains "well it's not going to fix it you have to keep going" and I snapped at him (cause I was getting VERY upset by this point) "I don't want to have to go to physio for the rest of my life". also at some point, I don't remember where, he was like "also maybe lose some weight" at which point I just saw red.

holding back tears, I told him "this is not normal, I have been in debilitating pain almost every day of my life, I know other people my age and weight and they don't experience this, other people don't have to go to physio every week, something is wrong with me". he just kind of sighed and said "what do you want" and I said "I want to be tested I want to be diagnosed I want to find out what's wrong with me and I want to know if it can be fixed and how".

he started talking about how he can't just refer me to a specialist he has to do tests first, blah blah blah, and I was like "so do the tests!!" so he started writing a prescription? thingy for me to get x-rays and by that point, even though getting x-rays was one of my goals for the appt, I felt utterly defeated. I took the slip and barely said another word to him before I left.

I sobbed the entire walk home, and then I sobbed myself to sleep. I was being crushed by the weight of what, at the time, felt like an inevitability: that I would never get help, I would never be fixed, I would be in pain for the rest of my life and nobody would even believe me if I tried to explain it. the thought of having to fight tooth and nail just to have my pain be acknowledged was too much for me. I already had to fight my own anxiety, and our broken healthcare system, just to get an appointment, and all it ended up doing was traumatizing me even more. so what's the fucking point of even trying.

anyway, I feel marginally better now. I still have the referral for an x-ray that I do intend to go through with, though I'm desperately hoping I don't have to go back to that dr to discuss the results. luckily there's dozens of clinics around that I can go to, though hopefully it won't take dozens of appointments to find a dr who's sympathetic and competent at their job. it sucks absolute ass, but I'm not giving up yet. stay tuned next time for more thrilling adventures in the Canadian healthcare system!

[mytruthandbeauty]

3 June 2023

All that I’ve written until now has been praise for Mexico and rightly so, because I do love the country and it has so much to offer. However, in all honesty to present a balanced picture I should take some time to point out what I consider to be some of the country’s flaws.

This is not going to be an exhaustive list as I’m speaking from personal experience only for example I have no experience with nor do I know anyone who has an experience with any of the cartels so I can’t speak in an educated way on what they are all about. Now on to that which I have had first hand experience.

I haven’t tried to get a temporary residency visa, but I have read several articles both official and anecdotal and I’ve watched different YouTubers sharing their knowledge on the subject along with immigration specialists and I’ve determined from this that I don’t have nearly enough income to qualify for the visa. This is a problem for me, because I would prefer to be a legal immigrant here to be able to come and go as I please as well as use the public healthcare system if I ever needed it. And as I’ve stated above I love Mexico and want to remain. I don’t want to do repeated border runs indefinitely and who knows how long immigrations would allow me to do that. I think that there should be a separate visa for retirees with a lower income standard, because if you’re not working you don’t have certain expenses related to working outside the home. And I’ve shown in my life that I can comfortably live here on a monthly income much less than what the visa standard is. I’ve done it for more than 2.5 years. So, I’m not happy with the immigration laws.

Another thing about Mexico I don’t like is the noise. Depending on where you live it could be roosters crowing at all hours, dogs barking incessantly, the propane gas delivery man passing by his truck emitting this little jingle repeatedly or the worse is the insanely loud music blasting from speakers from the bars or clubs. Honestly, I am not bothered by any of these with the exception of the overbearing music from the bars, because not only are they unreasonably loud but they typically start late evening and go on until the almost dawn every day of the week.

Something else that I don’t like about Mexico is the cat-calling, the guys who think it’s okay to grope you and those who try to pick you up while asking for sex. It can be very tiresome.

I do wish that the tap water was drinkable, but it’s not and I don’t use it to cook either. Some say you can use it to brush your teeth just don’t swallow it, but I don’t do that either. Fortunately you can have the large 20 liter bottles delivered to your home for a small cost of about $2.00 USD.

And finally from what I can see recycling doesn’t seem to be a priority here, at least not in Puerto Vallarta. In light of the climate catastrophe I think that is something everyone should be taking seriously including governments on all levels, but that some Mexican governmental agencies aren’t is tragic and criminal. Don’t get me wrong, I love living in Mexico and I’m very happy I moved here, but I simply wanted to point out these things that I wish were better. I don’t believe there is a perfect country anywhere, for that to happen it would have to be uninhabited by humans, because humans seem to take pleasure in fucking up even the best of places. Still there are some places they have ruined less then others and for me Mexico is one of the less spoiled ones.

A quiet moment on the bank of the Rio Cuale in Centro.

[dreamgirledward]

i cant believe i feel the need to say this in 2023, but please do not look for/trust random medical information on social media. ESPECIALLY tumblr??? your first red flag should always be what EXACTLY someone is using as a source for their claim. people will literally just say ANYTHING and be WRONG and get so many notes/likes/etc and the attention a post will get will = factual evidence for some people. please stop spreading shit for the sake of it. the human body is a miraculous wonder but we have doctors and healthcare systems that can actually help you answer questions you have for a fucking reason. i know a lot of us have had unfortunate or hurtful or even harmful encounters with doctors but those are cases of MALPRACTICE. that does not mean you should reject your healthcare system or the professionals that actually know what they're doing completely. learning how to ask the right questions is important. regular check-ups are important. navigating what you believe is a personal attack vs what is actually voicing a concern is important. regular vaccination is important. seeing specialists is important. understanding your anatomy is important. please dont let the internet tell you medical care is a hoax and everyone is out to get you. jesus CHRIST.

[stuckinapril]

I've seen so many horror stories of women being dismissed by healthcare professionals for whatever ailments they're having, even experienced it once myself. Now from the beginning of the year, the same thing has been happening to my husband. Ten days, seven doctors, not one of them listening to what he has to say, what's troubling him. They're so fast at prescribing anti anxiety/blood pressure meds, when that's not the problem, but they're not willing to listen to him, it's like they're just looking to get rid of him asap. I'm sick of the healthcare in my country. Both private and the state sponsored. All the good healthcare professionals moved abroad because the living and working conditions here are shit. We're supposed to move in a couple of months too, but I wish we could get someone to listen and check what's truly causing his issues so we can finally get it fixed and we can proceed with the move. It's a digestive issue but they're not even willing to hear him out and send him to the right specialists for tests. It's like they all do horoscope readings and already know what's wrong as soon as he walks in the door. "It's anxiety", "It's your heart", "It's your blood pressure". I'm exhausted even though nothing is wrong with me. I can't even imagine how he feels. One got close saying it may have been food poisoning but that doesn't last over two weeks and cause random flare ups. I hate it here.

I'm sorry for venting in your ask box, you're the first familiar blog that showed up on my dash and I just had to let it all out. Thank you for the open ask box and any time you spend on this. And again, I apologize especially if it's too much

hey it's not too much at all. i'm actually a pre-med student, so this kind of dialogue is really relevant to me. it breaks my heart reading stuff like this. all my life all i've wanted was to be a doctor, but i literally had a wholeass crisis about how inherently broken/unfair the system was the other day--from stories i hear through friends and family, to credible articles, to books i read about the state of healthcare. it's so, so fucked up.

i'm sorry this is happening to you and your husband. i don't know where you live, but i'm sure the doctors there swore some kind of hippocratic oath too. it genuinely scares me that i could ever become that jaded or disinterested in the state of my patients. but most of all, it makes me angry as fuck that they have the audacity to treat you and your husband like this. i hope you and your husband figure it out

[zanarkandfayth]

blah blah talking about my health cos I feel like it, ignore if you're just here for fandom stuff

went for my post-op follow-up monday and finally, finally got a fucking name for what's been wrong with me. am not going to bother googling for the official name again lmao but basically it's chronic (not acute) gallbladder disease. no stones whatsoever, just my gallbladder deciding to give up the ghost and getting inflamed over and over for years and scarring each time and that's why for the past three or four years food has made me gradually more and more sick to my stomach and left in pain after eating until last summer when it finally erupted into the pain that sent me to urgent care who sent me to the ER (yay, more debt I'll never pay).

on the one hand, I'm so goddamned relieved to finally have a diagnosis and KNOW that I'm not fucking imagining it or making it up after all my tests and scans kept coming back as negative/normal (mostly cos no stones, but who knows why the HIDA one showed nothing wrong), but on the other hand, I mentioned the nausea and pain to my GP when it first started and he fucking dismissed the nausea entirely as caused by my acid reflux and wanted to put me on medication for IBS "to see if it helps" without actually TESTING me at all for IBS, it was just because of the stomach pain and absolutely no fucking other typical symptoms (I refused, btw, after googling and seeing that it could CAUSE issues if you took meds and didn't have IBS) and I can't help but feel like it wouldn't have gotten nearly so bad if he'd taken me seriously from the start and referred me to a specialist instead of dicking around and doing fuck-all for a few years. and because I'm poor as fuck and have no insurance, finding a new doctor wasn't an option for me. ugh. hate the state of healthcare in this fucking country. so my relief is kinda soured by that.

anyways, it can take up to two months for my body to adjust and I might always struggle to eat certain things so I'm still kinda hrgh about it and food is still miserable right now, but if I could just get back to being able to eat most of my normal things I could live with that, so... fingers crossed I guess. also the incisions STILL haven't healed, though I finally got the steri-strips off, but tbh that's just made it even harder to not scratch... it's absolutely killing me, I need them to just scar so fucking badly hhhhhh.

also I still have my chronic fatigue and other health problems that I couldn't get my doctor to take seriously, so that's fun. but he left the clinic a few months ago so maybe whoever is going to replace him will be more willing to listen to me. I'm so tired of being tired and if I have to be tired, I want some fucking disability so I can at least buy my own goddamn groceries.

the end. I ate earlier so I'm actually feeling sick so I'm going to reread the last few chapters of my fic and then maybe I'll actually be capable of writing, if the brain fog isn't too bad. stupid fatigue.

[iwillpardonnothing]

MAN I GET SO MAD ABOUT HEALTHCARE. I gave a doctor (a specialist!!) a SEVENTEEN PAGE DOCUMENT describing every major issue I've had in the last decade of my life and all my major symptoms/their duration in nice, neat bullet points, and he shrugged his shoulders and said "general laxity"

Well now I'm finding out by doing my own damn research that those symptoms continually point to ONE ANSWER and it ISNT GENERAL LAXITY. I'm so FUCKIN sick of this bullshit!!! Why is access to specialists so difficult? Why did that doctor not spend more than five minutes with me across two appointments? Two appointments and I don't think I spent more than five minutes in a room with him. I know I'm prone to hyperbole but I'm not kidding. Five. Minutes.

Am I just gonna have to do everything my damn self? Am I gonna have to tell a doctor exactly which tests I want ordered and exactly what I want checked? Is that how this is gonna go? And I'm lucky that I have a basis for medical jargon because a lot of this stuff is too dense for ME, let alone the average high school anatomy educated citizen. How are THEY supposed to figure out what's wrong?

Doctors are supposed to be beacons in the dark of illness and disease and disorder, and for some reason they've just cumulatively decided to turn out the lights. And I know why too—I know it's a systemic issue that starts at the poverty line. If you can't get good grades, you can't get into a good school. If you can't get into a good school, you might not make good grades because the quality of education is poor. If you can't afford a good school, you pick up a trade. If you get to med school and can't handle the hours, you work in research or something because there is no such thing as reasonable accommodations for doctors and nurses. You can't handle four back to back twelve hour night shifts? Sucks to be you dickhead, guess you can't be a doctor.

The medical field as a career is so horrifically ableist and backward. I have zero trust in doctors, literally zero. That doctor didn't read that document I gave him. It went into my file and he forgot about it. He did a cursory hypermobility examination and he didn't even do the whole thing either—I've administered that test to myself several times. He was trying to check how far my knees bend backward while I was wearing thick blue jeans twice the width of my actual leg, and then when I told him I was actually in so much pain that I couldn't bend enough to even TRY to touch my toes, he literally blinked at me and then moved on. No questions about the back pain. None. A doctor who was in the process of trying to diagnose my pain and he didn't ask about it.

I'm just so tired of this. Every time I go looking for answers, I do usually find some. I could have had a career in medical research if I didn't fucking hate college so much. But it makes me angry that I had to be the one to find them. No one is your advocate in the US healthcare system. You are a profit, a face, a number. If you do not do your research and press when you feel your needs aren't being met, you're fucked. Welcome to America.

[wyrmguardsecrets]

Therapy? In this economy? You do realize that its like $200+ pet week and not everyone has that. Even though some insurance companies offer to copay like Aetna and Cigna that's still going to cost $100 per month if you go on the Healthcare site. Then you're running tye risk of them canceling your insurance cause insurance companies don't think mental health care is neccessary.

uh they can't cancel your insurance for that lmao, that's not how insurance works.

like don't get me wrong, the state of health care in the states is fucking terrible, but please don't spread misinformation like that to scare people.

it's also not the health insurance company that determines if you have a copay or not. that's dependent on what plan you have chosen from whatever is available through your employer or through the marketplace, medicare, medicaid, veteran's insurance, chip, etc.

it's also noteworthy to say that every insurance plan must have some coverage for mental health and that coverage must be comparable to physical health. that basically means that if your insurance has a $50 copay for specialists (like a cardiologist), then the copay for your therapist or psychiatrist must also be $50. it cannot be more than that.

like we said - shit sucks dude but please don't spread misinformation about the already shitty system, especially when it might make people afraid or reluctant to go seek help if they actually do have the access to do so.

[freetheshit-outofyou]

The hospitals are overwhelmed and the beds are full because people won't get the vaccine. If you have an accident or you are hurt bad you might get into an emergency room but you won't get a bed because people who are unvaccinated are the priority. This has nothing to do with lack of healthcare workers. Our local hospital is fully staffed but all beds are taken. Try again with your bullshit. You don't know a fucking thing!

Anon, I don't know where you are so I can't speak to your area but it is clear I am more in tune with what is happening in our hospitals, and the ones I have contact with than your propaganda driven idea of what is actually happening in hospitals all over the nation. But before I slap you with facts let me tell you a little bit about me, and beat you with some learning you clearly need. A much earlier version of me was a U.S. 54B Army Chemical Operations Specialist. I know your dumb ass has no clue what that job does or what it is all about and I doubt you have the mental capacity to even fathom what one has to go through to get the MOS. You would not know that is it not just about chemical warfare but also Nuclear and Biological warfare. Part of that is understanding contamination control, contamination by chemical, microbial, physical, and biological, how they spared or how to protect against cross contamination from all those sources. I know I have already gone over your head but why stop now.

Because of that old job I am fairly confident I know more about controlling viruses, how to avoid contamination and cross-contamination than you. I know you are saying to yourself I'm wrong but you and I both know you were wrong and full of shit from the start....Let's keep moving. I was dealing with Nuclear, Biological, Chemical contaminates that were in the .05 - 10μm range. (1μm 'micrometer' is of one millionth {10 to the 6th power} of a meter.) Our old friend CoVID19 is running between .5 - .14μm or 50nm 500nm to 140nm. (NM=Nanometers) Those things were DESIGNED to be persistent agents meaning they had a long life in open environments and were a challenge to contain and decontaminate. CoVID is not persistent, but the "measure" used to control it ALLOW the spread openly. Not one thing that the US has done from the start was designed to control this virus, to slow or control the contamination or cross-contamination of the US, it's population or in anyway control the infection rate. ALL OF IT WAS DESIGNED TO CONTROL YOU! It has clearly worked. Anon, you and I see people all day long wearing surgical mask and N95 type respirators, it is common place now. I'm not even going to address the absurdity of masks made from cotton weave materials, place eye roll here. I digress. A surgical mask is made to be used in a sterile environment to stop the exhale of particulates into the sterile environment. They are not, and never have been, made to filter airborne contamination FUCKING EVER, like never in the history of fucking EVER. A surgical mask is made to be used for a limited amount of time, most manufactures recommend no longer than 8 hours, not to reuse them. The N95 is a respirator, much different than a mask and better in almost all respects. The N95 has a limited wear length of 3 to 4 hours and should not be reused. I have reused them in my shop well past their point of effective usage but I'm working in a shop with very large particulates. When one is trying to not get infected, to avoid contamination and cross contamination it looks much like this....

So stop pretending anything people put on their faces to stroll around Walmart is stopping the spread of anything stronger than bad breath. NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT YOUR HOSPITAL LIES. My Bride is a nurse, she has been a nurse much longer than CoVID19 has been forcing people to hid at home. She has had the displeasure of working with things like SARS-CoV and MRSA where she has to dress in dress in positive pressure protective suits just to treat those people. That is what you wear if you really really don't want to catch what is in the air, none of us are wearing those. Her hospital in July fired 300 medical staff, then stopped the higher of 267 open medical staff positions, THEN canceled the contracts of 150 travel medical staff AND THEN cut the hospital bed capacity by half. The hospital was strictly a double and triple bed hospital, then over the course of a week they were a single bed hospital. Guess what happened, all of a sudden the hospital went of 42% bed usage to 107%, just like that. Then the hospital activated emergency staffing procedures that forded medical staff to work mandatory overtime, you know to fill all those slots for people they had fired, or refused to refill through natural attrition. Quite literally it is a self created problem. I would like to say this is an isolated issue but all 3 reginal hospitals here have done the same thing, The Barton Health care system has done the same thing, as has Kaiser Permanente. So when I say the hospitals have created this problem I speak from experience and a personal understanding of what is happening. I'm not even going to add in the medical staff fired for spending 2 years fighting this viruses without a shot only to be fired for not getting it. The hospitals here are not overflowing with the sick and dead from CoVID. The ER's and Urgent Cares are not backlogged or over flowing. Last week my Bride had a floor of 27 CoVID infected patients, of those infected half did not needed to be hospitalized, but only 8 of the ill did not take your lord and savor the vaccine in their bodies. She told me those numbers are about average for the last year. Anon, I suggest you stop listening to the "news" and get out into the world and see what is really going on. We are 2 1/2 years into this buttfucking and you are still asking for more.