#whatever i am working thru it im getting thru it

[marsixm]

i guess the answer is youre not “supposed” to have bad emotions. if you do thats your fault. even if you dont want them and cant control their existence. even if you dont act on them. even if you actively dont act on them. if you cant either be normal or pretend to be normal convincingly, you get shafted

[noxious-fennec]

A redraw of an old thing because exam season is the only time i get creative energy ig

[b4kuch1n]

ough brain is doing SO bad but sometimes. there are colors

[joelletwo]

WAIT i never complained abt my scheduling lol. still have not seen my actual boss more than that one five seconds and me and main coworker are supposed to work coverage out amongst ourselves bc thats more relevant fine and okay. but i ask her about what i should switch to going more part time and off of being Fulltime In Training and she says oh ill talk to [boss] about it. and then does and tells me oh [boss] wants to talk to u about that today or tomorrow.

she never does and shes never in her office so i dont hear anything by friday when i work w my second coworker. who i dont really think either of us vibes w the other lol weve been nice but im happy not to work w her. and the feeling is mutual bc she told me oh is this ur last friday i didnt think u were working [boss] told me u were going to be switching to mon-thru-thursday. OKAY? thats really funnily pointed but WHY DID SHE TELL U AND NOT MEEEEEEE. why cant i just know what im working more than two days in advance lolllllll. i am not made for this pwease.

[universalsatan]

okay like. i haven’t read a lot. crippling undiagnosed adhd and probably memory issues have kept me from consuming books since like elementary school. i probably finished one assigned novel in high school and i finally finished a whole novel for fun last year. i’m churning through moby dick slowly atm, but as a decent editor and writer and hence someone associated with the writing community and seeing those booktok recs or whatever…

girl tell me why the first book i open. starts with a fucking. spotify playlist. like, i was Aware that these books were wattpad-level. but i didnt think it was THAT wattpad holy shit

[cerealmonster15]

haikaveh... save me haikaveh...

i KNOW it's been talked about to death but. the haikaveh research project. it literally haunts my mind. i cannot get over the implications. alhaitham going through his school life as someone that most people dont even really know about because he keeps to himself and doesn't socialize, with kaveh being the one exception to that, finding his way into his life as his Best Friend, and then leading to alhaithams one and only time he participated in a research topic. his bio says he only ever did ONE joint project!!! one!!! the one with kaveh his best friend and i think also his only friend at the time!!!! and then it ended in not only the project falling apart but also alhaithams only friendship. kavehs best friendship. they were each others closest person. they had no family around - alhaithams parents having died when he was young and his grandmother dying before he joined the akademiya, and kaveh's dad dying when he was young and his mom having moved to fontaine. like even if you dont look at it through a romantic lens it's still undeniable how important they were [and are] to each other..........

i'm getting off track but my point is very specifically for alhaitham, the one time he got close to someone, made a friend, even agreed to join one(1) group project ever, it ended in disaster. it led him into a fight so bad that his one and only friend said he regretted that friendship!!!! it was so bad alhaitham left the project and he and kaveh didnt speak for ages until they just happened to run into each other again at the tavern!!!!! like obviously it has to be incredibly awful for both of them but i just think how this probably had alhaitham in the cynical mindset that friendships and collaborations like that might just never work out for him because the one time he let someone into his life, it blew up on him and he was all alone again. even though alhaitham never seems to care much if people dont like him, that clearly cant still apply to someone he was exceptionally close to. like if he didnt care he woudlnt have been the one to take his name off the project and mutually not speak to kaveh...... kavehs words are the ones that hit the most significantly to alhaitham.......... kaveh is said/implied to have had at least some other friends while at school / people knew who he was, but not so much alhaitham. people didnt know him and the ones that did just knew he didnt socialize/he was not easy to get along with. he only had kaveh and then, for a while, he lost him too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[opens-up-4-nobody]

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[angelstrawbabie420]

in my quest to quell my pain ive only hurt myself worse. damned if i do damned if i dont.

[munamania]

i dont wanna be a dick and act like i have no responsibility in this but after a point dont u think if all you ever say to ur friend is Omg you never make it out why dont you ever come out with us you bail all the time youre such a flake etc. dont u think that person (me) is like. not gonna feel so inclined to. be there

[qprstobin]

I love all the people in the tags of my post like "he'd like fiction just the trashy kind" which I think you're right! I think he'd like trashy romance and pulpy horror a lot! I mostly said he didn't like fiction because a) i think people forget you can read things other than fiction (and this was an era where people were starting to write things like fast times at ridgmont high and tell all biographies about their time in Hollywood and b) people constantly actin like Steve is going to enjoy LOTR. Like I love LOTR and I am currently on the third book but... Those books are THICK and hard to get thru even for people who read a lot. I could see Steve being moved to finally read the books when the movies come out but 20yo Steve is NOT going to read LOTR he would not get past Tolkien's long ass explanation of how hobbit ages and parties work I barely got past that 😭😭😭 like if you want him to read fantasy make him read earth sea or st

[leijonzzz]

I LOVE SUIKODEN SOOOO FUCKING MUCH

[milo-is-rambling]

I wish I had friends near meeeeeee to distract me from my brainnnnnnnnnn

[fillejondrette]

i've had two friends who are very good at and comfortable with social interaction tell me that they think they're autistic. and all i can do is roll my eyes. i feel like people see so many tiktok videos about how like, rewatching shows is a sign of autism that they forget difficulty with communication and social interaction is the fundamental trait of autism

[izzy-b-hands]

On a random fic related side note, just saw I'm at nearly 80 fics written for our flag, and can only think to myself

'wow bud, you had like. over 100 for the Pacific probably even faster than this. You've really lost steam, huh?'

and like. Brain. could we just enjoy the number go up, even if number go up SLOWLY

[vitiateoriginator]

I'm literally so anxious about going to work tomorrow, and basically every day now. One of the managers has been up my ass about getting stock out of the back room, but the manager of my department is pissed that that everything looks like trash, but the manager of the front end won't send anybody to help me clean it up, and she always takes away the coworkers who've been assigned to help stock and recover in my department to go put clothes back on the floor from the fitting room. also keep getting told to cover the front end when the front end coordinator has to take their breaks, and keep getting called on register. I'm struggling so much cause I'm getting pulled every which way with very little help, and told I'm not working hard enough. I'm expected to stock and recover and entire third of the store by myself, while all the other coordinators have designated helpers for their departments so they can focus on the importanr stuff.

The first manager I mentioned threatened to start taking disciplinary action against me cause she thinks I'm not doing good. She literally pulled me in the office to ask why my department looks like shit and why sales are down 10% from this time last year and proceeded to tell me its because Im not focused or working fast enough. I tomd her its cause I need more help and then she tells me I never ask for it. When I literally do. All the time. And never get it

Now 3 out of 4 of my managers are getting transferred to other stores, including the manager of my department, as well as my boss. The manager who's been up my ass is staying tho. The person who's going to be my new boss was the store manager of my location before apparently, and according to my coworkers she's strict. And another manager that's transferring to our store has also been there before. She was, and probably will be, in charge of the schedule. Apparently she's very stingy with giving out hours and only gives bare minimum (which would be 25-30 hours for full time employees like me). I literally cannot handle more bitch ass managers on my case, especially for so little pay and so little time to work

I'm sad because I actually liked this job up until now. I wanted to stick woth it for a year at least. But I see now I'm not going to be able to. So looks like I'm on the hunt for a new job. Again.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

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