#whatever... aaaand post
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hi guys!! i'm currently trying to pay for college, so i'm opening commissions!! please check my carrd for more info!! :3c
for smaller sketch/doodle type comissions, check out my ko-fi!!
for larger, more complex stuff, you can check out my artistree!!
some examples of my work:
#artists on tumblr#commissions open#my art#ooh okay i actually don't know how to tag this#whatever... aaaand post#you can rb this. if you want 🤷♂️😁
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You are not WET. You are not KITTY. and you are not ANGRY!!!!!
transcript below:
(You are not WET.) (You are not KITTY.) (And you are not ANGRY!!!!!)
Siffrin! Wait up!
(…Hrm.)
(The group reforms and continues on.) (...Down the hallway.) (To where the Director must be waiting.)
(...) (...Last time, they didn't join you.) (And then you faced the Director alone.)
(You...) (Remember.) (Xem holding you.)
Huh?!
What's wrong?
There were sky pieces here.
...But there aren't any? What are you talking about?
I must be mistaken, sorry.
(Is this the correct hallway???) (You're not sure anymore!) (Where does this door lead then?)
(...)
(OH, BLIND IT ALL.)
#isat au#story#isat#overkill au#in stars and time#asks#loop 3#aaaand cut. probably the last post for the night unless i change my mind#i work tomorrow! Unusual for me on a tuesday but whatever
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substitute
#my art#daycare attendant#dca fandom#moondrop#<- dca.. they're back in town ...#not tagging sun bc thats just their head :p#anywayyy hopefully this means something to someone. that's all i could ever wish for when it comes to my art#thats probably a bit too sentimental or something but sometimes it's hard to tell if the stuff you make is actually reaching people#or if you're just another person making content to satiate an insatiable crowd#is my art edible? is it a meal to you? is it a one time only thing? does it have any lasting effect on you?#is it just nutrients to sustain you? or is it something that will genuinely stick to you for at least longer than the first second?#i will stop talking now. you can eat my art as much as you'd like but can you at least savor it a little? compliment the chef a little bit?#for the ones who've read this far: this is actually for an AU i've been thinking about recently. i won't be sharing what it's about lol#but if you wanted some context for this... here you go. i'd like to think this has more meaning to it than just being an AU though#and maybe me not disclosing what the AU is will make you think about this post for a bit longer? it's a mystery now....#aaaand i just noticed i forgot the bells on the ribbon on their arm. great. excellent. perfect. whatever
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okay this is raw and rough, but I don't think I'll get myself to actually write something better, so here is an idea/outline of a scene I had in mind for this piece I made:
After Merlin leaves the lake, unable to keep looking at Arthur's body, he finds Gwaine fallen and unconscious on his way back to Camelot. He despairs and manages to make him come back to consciousness (he is not dead yet)
"Merlin…" Gwaine opens his eyes with effort and murmurs. He smiles, his heart at ease just by seeing Merlin's face again.
"Gwaine, stay with me, I can't lose you too" Merlin pleads, his eyes already turning a soft shade of golden.
"The king…"
"Arthur is gone…" Merlin's voice stumbles.
"So I failed him… I failed you... Camelot..."
Merlin is desperate as he takes off Gwaine's restraints, saying, "No, no, Gwaine, please… Don't take the blame for me."
With no strength left, Gwaine collapses onto Merlin, unable to support his weight or even raise his aching hands. How he wishes to caress Merlin's face, to swipe away the golden tears streaming down his cheeks.
"You did everything you could, Merlin..." is all he can manage to speak.
"I know… I know about—"
"Shhhh, that's not important now… please, Gwaine… Stay with me, please, just stay," Merlin says as he raises his body and places his glowing hands over Gwaine's chest in a desperate attempt to find the knight's heart. "I have to—I can do this..."
"Merlin, you can't..." Gwaine's breath-catching voice is hardly audible at this point.
“Don’t say that! Don’t— Don't you dare! You don’t get to give up! You can't!”
"Merlin..."
“No! No, not yet. I never told you everything. I never showed you what I am. I... if I’d just—”
“You’re everything I already knew" Gwaine cuts him softly, his voice is quiet, devastatingly gentle. "Even the parts you tried to hide. I loved all of it.”
“That's unfair! I’m losing you before I even had the chance to be honest... To tell you how much I lov- how much I love you...” Merlin shakes his head, voice cracking.
“Love isn’t fair sometimes... Yet, it's real."
Merlin's magic is worn out and shaky, and the glow in his hands falters. Unable to find Gwaine's strength to give his life back, he is exhausted and shaken. He tightens his clutch on Gwaine.
“Don’t go. Not yet" he begs, his tears falling down like a waterfall.
"I'm not worth your tears, Merlin" with his own tears streaming down his face, Gwaine tries to give him a little smirk but fails.
"Yes... Yes you are..." Merlin sobbs "I'm the one not worth of yours..."
"Yes you are... You've always been... It's always been you, Merlin... You..."
"I know..."
"It's alright, Merlin..." Gwaine smiles with difficulty.
"It's not alright! I can't lose you!"
"Maybe in another life I can find you again… and fall in love with you again… and make you happy…"
"You make me happy! Please, don't go, don't go…"
A moment of silence. Merlin's magic is failing, he is becoming weaker by the second, and Gwaine's body is slowly fading. Merlin has to lay down, carefully resting Gwaine down with him.
".. Hey, Merlin..." Gwaine whispers, his voice almost unrecognizable, quiet and emptying.
"Hi, Gwaine" he answers, lips trembling, tears falling, his eyes trying to scan Gwaine's face one last time, carving him into memory. Merlin lowers his head down so Gwaine can share his last words as a whisper in his ear:
"If I had the chance to go back in time... to love you once more... to be held like this by you... I'd go through it again..."
#aaaand this is why I don't write as often#gods this is so bad and cliche and cheesy I'm so sorry#can you all notice how this is 100% inspired by francesca by hozier?#cause yeah it is... anyway#this is just one of the many scenarios in my mind while i was drawing them#you guys can feel free to have your own#merlin#gwaine#merwaine#bbc merlin#mergwaine#merlin/gwaine#gwaine/merlin#my fic#can i count this as a fic?#idk#apollo posts#ALSO: please ignore any typos or misspellings or mistakes or whatever. thank you very much :)
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I’m thinking again about Astarions sexuality and how I've seen some people (to be fair, just a few) talk about it. Mainly, people pointing out his flamboyant behavior, and that us as players are learning more about his past male lovers than female ones and basically all these things for some people pointing to him being gay or at least not interested in women in the same way he is in men. And him only being a romance option regardless of gender, because, well, all companions are and he is therefore just "playersexual", only showing interest in female player characters because he has to, because of the game mechanics.
I think what really rubs me the wrong way about this topic is that it echoes the kind of things bi/pan people (speaking as a bisexual woman myself) find themselves dealing with irl. Whether through some form of internalized biphobia or from the outside through other people's comments. Of course this is about a fictional character so it’s not like he has any feelings that could be hurt. But when i see people tallying up how often he mentions men vs. how often he mentions women it really reminds me of a way of thinking I sometimes fall into in regards to my own sexuality. This is definitely just an internalized response and not something I actually believe when I truly think about it for a second, but I know these patterns of thought very well. Of observing my own behavior. How often do I find which gender attractive? Am I attracted "enough" to women? Do I talk about men's attractiveness too often? Is it the other way around? Am I only saying this woman is attractive to prove something to myself? I literally have a girlfriend and my attitude towards mine or other's sexual orientation is generally a huge big "whatever, I don't care". And I still have a passing thought like that from time to time.
So seeing people talk about a fictional character in this way really sends home how many people (whether consciously or unconsciously) see attraction as some sort of equation, you can solve, where in the end you get a result of either gay or straight.
#bg3#baldurs gate 3#baldur's gate 3#astarion#this has been sitting in my drafts for a few days but i thought why not just post it. its been on my mind.#i saw someone in the notes under a post about astarion literally counting off how often he mentions men vs women#and asking for proof of where he shows he is in fact attracted to women.#like... do you see what you're doing here??#aaaand another thing since people love bringing up his flamboyancy.... he is obviously playing that up a lot#because you know... that whole 'i have to seduce people so i am safe' thing#not saying that thats not also the real him but breaking it down to flamboyant=gay makes even less sense in the context.#its not that i think people shouldn't headcanon him as gay or asexual or whatever#i think thats great too. seeing different people's readings of the character.#just.... leave out the bi-/panphobia ffs. people dont have to show proof that they are in fact bi/pan.
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levi wanting to live his dream of getting hit by a truck and being reborn as an isekai protag so in the human world he runs in front of a truck but because he's a demon the truck gets fucking demolished and he walks away with the tiniest of scratches. he's suffering
#scrolling through my drafts and what the fuck hell is this#whatever. aaaand post#from me#obey me levi#obey me shitpost#imagines#3#q
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i think climate change discourse often uncovers ways that people have trouble thinking about things on a certain scale… for example it feels counterintuitive to say that on the one hand, the US is iirc the second biggest emitter as a country and the biggest per capita (since number one is china whose population is famously quite large), and on the other, if we waved a magic wand tomorrow and the US went fully net zero, that would not really have a huge impact on the situation as a whole. but it’s true, because there are just that many more people living Not In The US. or like, it is both true that taylor swift traveling is probably responsible for more emissions in a year than you or i would be in several lifetimes, and that banning private jet use entirely in every single country in the world would be a drop in the bucket at best because it’s a relatively small subset of a relatively small fraction of global emissions. a lot of ostensibly justice-focused climate rhetoric has a very moralistic viewpoint on what we might call disproportionate emitters - which is why many people read a sentence like “taylor swift’s private jet use is mathematically negligible in the grand scheme of things” and assume it’s some kind of ethical or moral defense of taylor swift (or the US, or 1%, or whatever) - but i am starting to feel like “what we really need to do is hold the rich accountable” is just as much performative magical thinking as whatever alleged greenwashed bandaid someone is bringing it up to criticize, because saying it feels radical or serious but betrays a pretty fundamental misunderstanding of the actual scale of the problem.
#you can actually see this in the infamous 100 companies study#100 companies responsible for 71% of emissions sounds like a lot!#the first four are nationally owned coal or oil companies#(which is one reason it kills me when people say the list proves the issue is capitalism lol number one is literally ‘china’)#by the time you get to exxonmobile at number 5#we’re down to less than 2% per company#also i recently learned from a politico post that that’s only 2% of a kind of emission that is only about half of worldwide emissions#aaaand that the study actually *includes* usage emissions#so that number doesn’t come solely from like exxonmobile out there drilling and whatever else#it also comes from people driving and people flying and doing all the other oil things#so when people are like ‘it doesn’t matter if you buy an electric car The Companies out there are doing the real bad stuff’#it is silly… if we mandate a shift to electric cars in all likelihood ‘exxonmmobile emissions’ as measured by this study would go down….
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idk who needs to hear this but write what the fuck u want man 😭😭 drabbles & long fics about whatevaaaaa. jus do what YOU want, not because you feel obligated to
#𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆.#not targeted at all just an observation i made over the few months on here on tumblr#the x reader tags are full w the same generic content and same tropes#and some of the writers who make such posts do say that they do that bcs it gets the most notes#especially the same smut ideas#…what do yall readers like sm about that anyway? reading the same thing over and over has to be exhausting HELP no shade#I WANNA KISS U ALL ON THE FOREHEAD MANNN#WRITE WHATEVER UR HEART DESIRES#ur blog = ur posts#ik it’s how tumblr works; u wanna get notes to gain traction & stuff#but if u only do that over and over and only write bcs u feel like u ‘MUST’ to write a certain smut trope#its gonna get tiring one day i promise#also one of the reasons why i left my previous account#phewwwww#AAAAND im not saying to not write those lil drabbles or whatever#I DO THAT TOOOOO#but my point is : do not limit yoursef to them!!!!!!!#vent cw#cw vent
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Qualia sisters designs GO (ft shitty mockups of their donut designs)
#i wanted to do more with the comic thingie but i soooo eepyyyy#adhoc labs#fandroid#melody qualia#harmony qualia#rhythm qualia#treble qualia#i randomly started thinking about them and now i need to develop all of them and their relationships#harmony is the eldest and falls into the trap of becoming really overprotective and overbearing#especially after humanity collapsed or whatever the fuck happened in the timeskip#she knows melody had been sneaking off to adhoc for a while and was NOT happy about it#but melody is a slippery one and kept sneaking out anyway#after or sometime during the timeskip she started to spend more and more time at adhoc waiting for fandroid to wake up#harmony couldn't leave qualia because. shes the eldest. she's got rhythm and treble to watch after her.#harmony argues with beepo to let her call through adhoc for a while before he lets her#and melody isnt happy about this (on top of the whole my best friend is in a coma deal)#she gets into a nasty fucking argument with harmony that ends in tears and a blocked contact#after a while the radio silence from melody DOES start to get to her#but beepo won't let her back in as per melody's request#(i also hc melody and bpo friendship real during the timeskip hehehaha)#and when 404 starts being 404#beepo cant even deny her requests to access because hes too focused on the bot raising hell#which starts to freak harmony out AGAIN because now shes getting radio silence from basically the embodiment of adhoc#i just think this character with little to no canonical content is neat#together they can make wonderful music but melody doesn't need them because fandroid can compose just fine#but the other three can't without melody#a choir never complete#anyway treble is transfem aaaand post
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(grits teeth) bones would tell u to be nice to ur self he would say its okay and not a problem and just a little thing and dont even worry sweetpea
#tl posts#sorry there is a vent/frustration/whine below here Of Potty Reasons. Sorry#its so embarrassing sorry. bleh#bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh these r my spam blehs#bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh bleh to uide other stuff#bleh bleh bleh bleh the ‘if u read past these belhs its by choice’ blehs#bleh bleh bleh bleh blarg. blhhhhhh#i. sneeze a lot like i have soo bad allergys esp in spring. n no i dont take anything bc im a idiot and cant ever remember#and it frustrates me to mess up that idk how to explain it ik i should. i cant remember ive tried setting habits n alsrms n#WHATEVER NOT THE POINT. anyway.#sneeze a lot. multiple times in a row. hard sneezes.#aaaand. idk weak bladder or something. anyway#inevitably on bad allergy days. i sneeze so hard i yk. pee a lil bit. usually im always wearing a pad anyway bc of this#WELL. EVEN W A HEAVIER PAD! I HAD! TO! CHANGE! BOXERS! THREE TIMES TODAY!!!!#AND IM EMBARRASSED AND UPSET AND FRUSTRATED#tl this is the agere side why r u embarrassed u outright say u use diaps sometimes#BC IM EMBARRASSED AND UPSET AND NOT SMALL ITS. DIFFERENT WHEN IM SMALL!!!#I KEPT TRYING TO USE THE BR TO BE ON TOP OF IT BUT!!#and now im trying to Be Nice To Me bc Bones Wouldnt Want Me To Be Upset At Me For this#BUT ITS NOT WORKINF AND I JUST KEEP FRUSTRATING MYSELF MORE
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finished my main oc refs finally!! ill hopefully make some profile pages for them with actual info... soonish... but at least i have good full-color visuals for them all now!!
left to right:
olivandre (oli) [they/them]
cameron [they/any]
jules [he/him]
#my art#artists on tumblr#oc art#oc: oli#oc: cameron#oc: jules#m: orig#m: htbi#gallery#polished#also changing the way i format the labels a bit bc having to go on desktop for line breaks is a pain#aaaand i hated the double parentheses for oli lmao#i WISH i could keep the line spacing condensed but whatever i guess#god i actually finished these like. idk at least a week ago. but i kept forgetting to post them#i make no promises that i wont keep tweaking them a little bit but like. they are Good Enough For Now#possibly someday ill post the Even Less Clothed versions but. separately
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uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
like... y'all i do have old cookie run ocs from like... 2022... 2023... and i feel a lil bad going offline no context no nothin for ages. i'm too lazy to draw in my normal artsyle during exam season aaaah-
anyways.
#crying over hands#yes i am still going to be drawing moth#he is my baby boy and i love him#same goes for my older dc content#i've been going more simplistic due to not having the time at all to draw#not gonna put this on like the main fandom tags cos this is a moots decision#y'all exams have me dead fhdvbggulavizb#yes this is because seeing shadow milk cookie unearthed my memory of my ocs#i had a whole ass circus of these idiots B) in 2022 I DON'T THINK THEY'VE AGED WELL-#i do have a lot of moth information to move from discord onto here#and dms to make regarding moth hehehehe#got an unfinished two-face art thing to post#aaaand whatever just raises my quality of life y'all i'm not bugged abt it
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what if...? joan cat and marnie cat..?
#soz deranged again.#aaaand im posting this sitting in the school library like a psychoooo path. whatever joan cat and marnie cat.#my art#mgd#oc: joan#oc: marnie
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i have no clue how to rip game files so you'll have to excuse recorded in-game audio blood splatter sounds and all but. erm. it makes a cute sound ok?
#sorry everybody it's 3 am so it's time to post random bullshit#<not bullshit to me. to me it's very important. sentries are my favorite machines from act 2 i love them so so much#swordsm beeps whatever. when will we talk about sentry hm?#i had no idea you can even stun them. i shot one's antenna today in cybergrind by accident and was like hey!!!! what was that noise....#and they have a fun animation if they get stunned but i couldn't get a good angle to like. make it into a gif or something#aaaand i also like how they kick you 50 million meters if you get too close. get the fuck ouuta here!!!!#also their article has a reference to engie!<me when somebody makes a reference to an insanely popular multiplayer fps
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Seatbelts on school busses are some bullshit. They didnt add them for safety bcuz if they did, then all busses would have them. No, they added them to further control students. I fucking hate them
#fuck you seatbelts on school busses#certified atlas post#sorry the bus they put us on (since mine ISNT HERE) has seatbelts#she didnt say we had to put them on but i still think theyre fucking stupid#whatever im mad. my bus was half an hour late without ANY warning#aaaand she missed a turn. the first damn turn and she literally skipped it 🫶#killing maiming etc
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🧍🏽♀️
#cryptic ramblings#in the tags#i know it looks like im rbing conflicting posts but ☝️ know that i understand society to be society at large like USA standards (in the USA)#vs community being smaller/more direct ?? like the people in my specific area (or other places depending on where ur efforts are put)#does that make sense????#like. i wanna retreat from society like a witch in the woods but also run a community garden or smthn like that.#this is just abt the last two posts i rb'd lol#(i think it was the last two)#aaaand im truly rambling now#whatever
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