#when I found she and I are only 4 months apart I got excited haha

[yasmeensh]

Zoo sketching

I went to the zoo yesterday. Can't go without a sketchbook :)

I think the one I brought was too small though... anyways, still served its' purpose. I decided to pack lightly and draw with a pen only (added pencil shadows during down-time). Since it's been a while from the last time I drew seriously, this has pumped me up to keep drawing more.

This bear was napping, woke up and walked in front of us, pooped, and went to it's private room where the zookeeper was waiting. It was spectacular.

[evsvolunteerstotem]

Christmas spirit and anticipation

22.12.2023

Ho ho ho!^^

Well, are you in the Christmas spirit yet? At least I can't get enough of it and this year my Christmas mood is accompanied by huge anticipation of my first trip home after 4 months in Plzeň. This is also why I'm writing a few days earlier this time because tomorrow I will be already sitting on the bus on my way home and I can't tell you how excited I am to finally see my family and friends again. :D

In the first months, it was super easy for me to be without them but now after a certain time and especially in the season that –in my opinion- is made for being together with your loved ones, I cannot say that I don't miss them.

Even my hometown which I was so happy to leave back in August has become something that I'm looking forward to. I think the quote "You don't really know how much you miss something until it's gone" definitely fits here but I am totally fine with the fact that it took me the decision to leave my home to fall in love with it again. At the same time Plzeň now even feels like a second home already. I've got a feeling for the city, I have found my favourite cafés, I made new friends who I grew so close with and I've learned the language and therefore already feel like I kind of belong here.

But enough about my current feelings... I'm sure you also want to know more about my last weeks and I can already tell you that it has been a very nice month.

So feel free to read on if you want to know more about my highlights in December…

The month began with a crazy change in weather. December really wanted to live up to its name and so it started to snow sooo much that Bolevec and the rest of the city turned into a little winter wonderland. I really started to get into the spirit, when I crossed the crowded Náměstí Republiky with the smell of freshly made trdelník, mulled wine, and other treats and was captivated by sweet homemade jewelry and figurines, cups, and clothing. At this point, I have to say that it's so hard not to buy anything, but it always helps me to ask myself if I really need another bowl, scarf or candle and the like (spoiler: the honest answer is almost always "no";D).

But of course I had to buy at least something for my family, because I knew that I wouldn’t have much time for that, when I came home (to be precise, just one day haha).

Therefore it was very pleasant for me that there is a really beautiful bookstore in Plzeň that sells -besides Czech and English literature- also very nice German books. And so I was able to leave the shop with a bag full of exciting and interesting literary works. The question I hadn't asked myself yet was how to transport all of them home and I’m still thinking about a good solution for that. ;D

Apart from getting into the Christmas mood this month, I loved meeting friends in cafes or pubs, going to the cinema with Káťa or taking walks through the forest, inhaling the cold fresh air and getting impressed by the beautiful surroundings.

One of my highlights this month so far was definitely that Maren spontaneously visited me for a few days!!! I was very happy to see her again and it felt so real and so surreal at the same time to have her back with me. We enjoyed a long weekend together and I loved how we just jumped into the conversation as if we hadn't even been apart for some time.

She arrived on Thursday in the late afternoon and we met in the city with Carme, a lovely Spanish girl who also lived in Maren's student dormitory. We had a good chat and after that, we said goodbye to Carme because she left only one week later. It was so nice to get to know her and we already set the deal that if we came to Barcelona or she visited some cities in Germany, we would contact each other for sure.

On Friday we went to the Christmas market, ate trdelník with cinnamon, and listened to a very enthusiastic singer on the constructed stage in front of the cathedral, before walking to another little market, where I saw a booth with vinyl records. I bought one typical Czech one for my father with songs by Hana Hegerová and I'm very sure that he will like it. ;D

On Saturday we took a long walk through the forest and then visited the  Plzeň Plaza - Not to buy anything, but just to stroll around and to get into the Christmas spirit, before we went to "Coffee Park" where we had the best and most beautiful Coffee in the city so far. In the evening, we made very delicious homemade wraps with hummus, vegetables, tofu and avocado (big recommendation!) and then we just played some funny games for two and ended the day with a little singing session, where we exchanged our favourite sad but also solemn songs together. I enjoyed his evening so much!!

On the next morning, Maren already got up very early to catch her train. So we just said goodbye but promised each other that we would see again soon.<3

This month I also planned a spontaneous trip to Karlovy Vary together with my sister. We met there on Friday afternoon and on our way to the flat, we were so impressed by the really nice architecture, the beautifully decorated buildings, and the countless lights that turned Karlovy Vary into a little Christmas fairytale town. Despite the wonderful scenery, there were fewer tourists than expected, which was extremely pleasant.

The next day we went to the historical museum of the city and it was really interesting to find out more about the origins and further development of Karlovy Vary. Later we hiked – and yes, it really felt like a bit of a hike – up to the Diana Tower. Of course, we could have taken the small train, but my sister and I thought we would manage it quite easily… well, when we got to the top we were actually a bit sweaty. ;D But when we got to the top of the tower the view really made up for the previous effort.

In the evening we went to a typical Czech restaurant and the waiter was very pleasantly surprised when I ordered in Czech and of course, I was also happy to be able to use my gained language skills. After dinner, we visited the cute Christmas market nearby and listened to a singer on stage who performed some Abba hits as well as beautiful Czech songs.

On Sunday, we ate breakfast at "Bagel Lounge" strolled through the city centre, went into some shops, and bought a few cute things, before going to another really nice café called "Lékárna by City Roasters" which means "Pharmacy" by City roasters, where we had really good coffee and chai latte. Then I brought my sister to the train station and it really felt a bit weird, when waving her goodbye but at the same time, I knew, that we would see each other again in less than a week. So I happily drove back to Plzeň, looking forward to seeing my family and friends again soon. <3

My highlight at work this month was definitely the Pub quiz on the 11th of December. I joined the team for TOTEM and in the beginning we were very weak and made the last place after two rounds but then it turned completely and we were able to get almost every question correctly. Even though we didn't make the first place in the end it was a very funny evening and I was impressed how well Martin organized this whole event. So you will see me at the next "Quizuj" in February for sure. ;D

I also really enjoyed the last conversations in the week before Christmas. I prepared some games that the seniors were very ambitious about playing while singing and listening to some nice Christmas songs and eating many (... like maaaaaaany) snacks. I was so happy when I saw how much fun everyone had and overwhelmed as I even received some presents from them. I am so excited to see everyone including my colleagues again next year and it definitely feels weird to leave Plzeň now for the first longer time but I'm sure that the time will fly and before I bat an eyelash, I'm back here again... ;D

The first snow at the Kamenný rybník :D

Spontaneous photo with Tatiana in the “Schována kavárna” <3

Our cute Christmas market on the Náměstí Republiky

Last photo with Carme before saying goodbye…

The best coffee a “Coffee Park” with beautiful Latte art!

The view from our apartment in Karlovy Vary

At the top of the Diana Tower with my sis <3

The wonderfully glowing buildings in Karlovy Vary

Beautiful sky above the Diana Tower

I'm looking forward now to having some holidays and then will be back with new energy at the beginning of next year.

Have a great time with your family and friends and all your loved ones and don't forget to tell them how much you love them, because this is worth so much more than any present.

Stay safe and see you again in 2024. ;D Brzy se uvidíme! Laila

[princekoo]

goodnight n go | one | pjm.

pairing. single dad! jimin x female teacher! reader

synopsis. jimin was a single dad of three and one unfortunate mishap caused him to meet you: his best friend’s coworker and daughter’s teacher. will feelings of petty loathing develop into something more?

genre/prompt. fluff, angst

word count. 4.3k

content. jimin is a pole dancer and has 3 kids as well as is 9 years older than oc. even if they’re both well over legal age, if that makes you uncomfortable, please consider not reading. thank you <3

writer’s note. I deleted it originally because I was unhappy with it as I wrote it when I was younger and didn’t have much experience in writing and my approach to it wasn’t as elaborate as the one I managed to develop all these months of practicing. so! here she is! she’s longer and has less parts so you won’t be annoyed with the constant changing haha. an important thing to note is that the oldest son’s name Songyoon was changed to Haneul, the little girl’s name Sooyeon was changed to Eunbyul, and the youngest’s name Sanghoon was changed to Hayun as their names were too similar and made it difficult to remember who was who. There was also many major plot changes as well as small ones, so it’s somewhat completely different to the earlier version. Anyways! Enjoy :)

parts. one / two

    The window curtains glittered under the moonlight’s loving, motherly kiss, this gentle caress closely similar to the unnaturally blond man’s embrace of a little girl–his precious little girl– in his arms. She was quite positively almost a copy of himself, down to his natural jet-black hair and plump, pink lips. The expensive curtains—most notably one of the most expensive things in the vicinity as what his little one wants his little one gets— danced with the wind let in by the open window softly, bringing the loud car horns and yelling of bustling city life with it. They’d been rendered to a simple ambient hum, considering how high up in the building they lived, however. The glitter scattered all throughout its length caused it to look like various constellations spread gracefully, causing his little one to refuse any other option that wasn’t it, unfortunately for his bank account. The neon lights of signs outside their New York City apartment, which would otherwise be annoying, entered only carefully tonight, as if to not disturb the gentle moment between the father and daughter.

“And so, the little princess was elated! The dragon had taken her to his cave filled with shiny little things all around, away from the princess life she hated.”

The raven-haired girl’s little eyes had shined in anticipation; the blonde man often mused it seemed like the night sky was trapped in her gaze since her birth, hence her name. She practically shook from excitement, her little brain unable wrap itself around how the princess pulled it all off so effortlessly! She didn’t know what to do with herself, so she clung to her dad’s silk night shirt as tight as her little fists would let her (which kind of hurt but he wasn’t going to stop her, he loved her too much to repress her). She liked to think of herself as close to that of a big, scary typhoon. He begged to differ with the more accurate description of the whirlpool one makes when circling their fingers in water repeatedly.

“The dragon taught her all she came to know! He taught her to read and write. Taught her to do basic things and they lived happily for just a few months. Then, the guards in the palace found her and came to get her! Do you know what they assumed, my beautiful little star?” Jimin had started looking at her fondly, the term of endearment coming out in their native tongue of Korean, accent prominently and endearingly laced in his English, soothing into every word he spoke. The nickname made her chest fill with warmth and her cheeks puff in reluctant happiness. No matter how many times her dear daddy would say it, it was her very own little term of endearment. Just for her and no one else. She loved it.

“That he was a big scary mean dragon! Right, daddy?!”

Jimin beamed at her intelligence. Then again, he does read her this story whenever she asks—and that’s nearly every weekend. He tickled her and held her tightly in his arms, her soft giggles reaching his ears just as the melodies he would dance to as a young boy would. Although he could still fit her in his arms, she was getting big. Give it two more years and he couldn’t do this anymore with her, hold her without difficulty and discomfort. The thought of such a cruel future made his heart sink a little. He had to stop himself often from thinking about how she would act when she became a teenager, it would be too much for his fragile heart to handle.

Jimin had always chastised her, as he was the only parent she had left. He took care of her and taught her valuable life lessons, sang her to sleep, and learned to make pretty hairstyles “just like a princess”, she’d say. He corrected her when needed as well as took on the role of both mother and father to her younger brother, Hayun (she preferred to call him Sunny after Jimin told her the meaning in English, which always made his heart melt), which was only a month old when their mother decided to pack her bags. Her older brother, although still a junior in high school, helped as much as he could to alleviate the toll that taking on both roles took on Jimin.

He was a great father, as one wouldn’t really expect. He was the right mixture of incredibly compassionate, well-humored, and empathetic with a dash of sternness to go along with it. He wasn’t a tyrant ruler, he listened to all three–well two, Hayun hasn’t even been able to string together a coherent longer-than-3-words sentence, only simple sentences, as a toddler does– and implemented all change that was agreed on by the majority. He always tried to pay equal attention to all of them, although most of it went to her younger brother. She didn’t mind though, she enjoyed playing with her older brother, Haneul. Jimin always packed him lunch, even as he whined that he didn’t have to do that, but he always enjoyed when he did it. She knew, noticing he always left to school with a small smile on his lips after.

Jimin has to assume complete responsibility once their… “mother” … turned up one day and decided she wanted nothing to do with her kids anymore. After taking her routine every night visit to the bar, she found someone older. Wealthier. “Much more fun” and “like you used to be before they showed up” she also gracefully added. Not like it was his fault he’d grown up once his first child was born, unlike her. Always looking for convenient fun, never tied down to anything. Proposing to her would just be in vain since it’s not like she would’ve accepted marriage anyway. Even during high school, when she first had come to him announcing her pregnancy, he knew how little care she held for him. She always thought of him as harmless fun, a man on the side and he couldn’t say the same of himself.  The first child was purely an accident, the other two was him desperately trying to convince himself it could all work out and she could change. After their third, he knew how wrong he was. He held feelings for her at one point, although, with time, it all disappeared. He could only hold feelings of loathing towards her at that point. She thought of the kids as nuances. She got sick of it. Sick of him. Sick of having just one person to kiss. She couldn’t be tied down, but just because he knew that, it didn’t mean it hurt any less. She’d left once Hayun was born, but Eunbyul didn’t know why. She always thought she didn’t love them anymore after seeing her mom with a man that looked uglier than her daddy for sure, but she seemed happy. Her mom said something to her before she’d left, looked at her weird, and screamed at her dad some more, but she couldn’t remember what it was. Often, she’d ponder when her mommy was coming back. Well, not like she could, anyway. They did move across the globe after, from Busan to New York, with no way to contact them. She didn’t mind not having a mommy for now, though, it’s not like she was ever home before anyway. It was always comfortable with daddy.

“Daddy! Please continue the story! Why’d you stop?! Pleeeeeeease…!” She pouted and looked up at him with those puppy eyes children knew to use when they wanted something to make their parents cave in fast in response to his hesitance to continue the story, her fake tiara skewing just a little to the side. One day, he’ll buy her a new one. One with diamonds and various other gems. His features seemed to light up and playfully mirror her own, his nose scrunching up as well. She, of course, as a sensitive, princess-y 4-almost-5-year-old, did not know how to differentiate someone being mean between someone playing, so she smacked him on the shoulder as hard as she could in her blind anger. Jimin yelped at the contact and sobered up, expression turning stern. Had she messed up? Did she do something wrong? Daddy’s face did the same face he always did when he was mad at her for doing something wrong. Eyes sharp. Lips in a straight line. Eyebrows drawn together.

“Eunbyul, you can’t hit anyone ever, you hear me? Especially me...” His voice was stern, but less confident as he trailed off. One look in her eyes and one could easily tell she was on the verge of tears. Why had the atmosphere changed so much? Why did the breeze still? Why was it so hot all of a sudden, but just on her face? Her tears were almost spilling out of her doe eyes, so his expression softened and panic flashed through his face. He had too soft a spot for her.

“...Not without expecting payback!” He announced out as a save and initiated a tickle attack by removing his arms supporting her back and wiggling them on her sides, causing a sea of reluctant giggles and laughter to erupt from her lips, tears of sadness now turned into ones of happiness. A wave of relief passed through her consciousness. He wasn’t mad at her anymore!

After he stopped tickling and her giggles piped down, he took her in his arms again and minimally rocked her back and forth again, attempting to continue the story. She gazed into his eyes. There, were two crescent moons filled with stars picked carefully right from the universe. They held warm nights of him wrapped in a blanket and always holding her in his arms while rocking her back and forth, looking back at her like she was his most valuable treasure. Nights of drinking lukewarm chocolate and sharing it with her while telling her countless stories he remembered or made up, her brother’s occasional snorting making her giggle. Those crescent pools of love staring right back at her with so much fondness, she couldn’t not trust him. He loved what he created with every inch of his being, even if she resembled her mother somewhat. She never felt so safe in any other person’s hold, even in Haneul’s. She felt safe and happy, sure, but not to the extent of her dad’s.

Pouting and closing his eyes as well as lifting his head up high in mocked snub, he opened one of his closed eyes.

“Well, if you’re done being rude, I’d like to finish this story for this week.”

A beat of silence went by as she looked at him with slight shame and tucked her head against his armpit. He sighed, breathily chuckled and shook his head slightly.

“You were right, princess. They did think he was a big, mean, and scary dragon that took the pretty little princess as his own treasure! The princess came back from getting berries just before the guards decided to kill the dragon!”

A gasp. A smile.

“She explained what happened and the guards decided to keep to themselves that they had seen the princess. The dragon and the princess lived what, my little star?”

“Happily ever after, right, daddy?!” She looked at her dad excitedly, completely engrossed in the story despite it being probably the hundredth time he told it to her since her birth.

A pause.

“That’s right, my love. The end…”

Although little Eunbyul understood simple Korean, she could barely speak it. Jimin planned on teaching her a little more down the line. Now, she barely understood some of the words, any longer than two syllables being too dang hard for her little brain to grasp at this late hour, right before her bedtime, but she didn’t care at this time. Not when his soothing voice graced her ears with the background noise only that of the far away beep of cars, the rhythmic rumbling in his chest every time he’s uttered a word soothing her to sleep. As she laid there in his arms, fast asleep, little snores leaving her nose, all that was in his mind was how he could never bear losing her.

He felt absolutely heartbroken and stressed, raising three kids on his own was unbearably hard. He loved them so much he had to look for a job in this new country. A job that paid well but let him work while the kids were asleep so he could care for them while they were awake.

He also made friends with his co-workers and shift manager, so it wasn’t too bad re-adjusting. They barely hired new employees since they had a very high criteria, so he barely had to deal with new hires that made his job harder. His kids are growing up, though. He knew that.  He feared they would leave like their mother did almost two years ago, so he’d decided to enjoy them and raise them as well as he could while it lasted. He was scared they’d decide they were sick of him just like she did. Irrational since his kids shared a strong bond with him and each other, but valid.

Jimin got up, arms still wrapped around her, she was growing and he could no longer able to hold her like how he used to. He moved the covers to make place for her and gently laid her down, taking her plastic tiara off her head. Covering her and laying a gentle kiss on her forehead, tears dangerously threatened to spill. The moonlight hit his face, making his eyes’ shine intensify into thousand galaxies in his beautiful, soft chocolate eyes as he got up to turn off her mermaid lamp.

“Sleep tight my little universe,” he chokingly whispered as tears freely fell from his eyes.

An abrupt sound made way to his ears and he turned around, finding his sixteen-year-old son holding Sunghoon. Jimin vigorously wiped his tears and gave Haneul a weak and quivering smile. The boy moved to put down the toddler he was holding in his crib and turned on the mobile, then mouthed to his father if he was okay, used to him being bubbly and strong for them, though it certainly wasn’t the first time he’d seen him cry. He took the role of confidant, listening to his father whenever he let himself be anything less than closed. He always looked so small, like a little boy. It always scared him. This wasn’t his big and amazing role model of a dad, was it? The one he bragged about to all his friends and anyone who would listen? Would he become like that, too? Out of the three kids, he was the one who remembered his mother the clearest, having been fourteen. He despised her, to put it nicely. He was the one that got to see to the extent that that woman caused their father to feel anguish, he got to know what not being loved by his mother was like.

Nodding, he ushered his oldest son out the room, more unrestrained tears rolled down his tear-stained cheeks. No matter how vigorously he wiped at them, they’d come back anyway, so maybe he should give up on wiping his tears just as he’d given up on trying to make his relationship work. It didn’t help that Haneul was the spitting image of his mother, either. Haneul wanted to press on, to question him and help him, but he decided to leave it. Glancing at both of his younger siblings sleeping, he decided maybe some things were better left unsaid. He slowly made his way to the door and once he reached it, pat his dad in the back and continued to his room. As Jimin tried to control his upcoming violent sobs, he shut the door behind him.

He couldn’t do this alone anymore. It was too much. He needed someone there.

   The cool autumn wind blew against Jimin’s cheek as he shook his hair to clear his fringe from his eyes. He brought his dainty hands into his jacket pockets as he puffed out air. While his breath may not have been visible, it sure as hell felt like it could be.

It was cold as fuck, to put it simply. Having a car would be absolutely beautiful right now, but circumstances really don’t line up with his wishes on the regular. He always kept forgetting to look into which car he would like best and to go purchase it, but the subways facilitated his route home and to work somewhat. His life would improve tenfold once he remembers to buy a car. He was very forgetful since there’s only so much he can keep up with, his brain take up with his three kids and problems. He could do that in the three days he had left, he guesses. Maybe tomorrow if he sets a reminder, even, would he be able to get a car. Before he left, he had saved up money for a living space able to hold all 4 of them and a mode of transportation. He could get rid of his subway card and buy a car or something, anything but dealing with the surplus of rats and drunkards at the time he used it. His credit wasn’t bad either, which could probably lower his purchase a little. His oldest used the same transportation he did, but he just wanted to drive his kids to school in the mornings and drop them off. Even more so, Eunbyul was starting school in just a few days, so he couldn’t afford to just walk her to school as it was half an hour away from their apartment building or even use public transport. It just didn’t feel right to him. All those cute hairstyles he planned on doing on her would be ruined by the time they got there.

Jimin kept pacing along the sidewalk towards the apartment complex where his kids are expected to be sleeping. Expected. It was 1:05 A.M., after all. A father can only hope his children listened well to him. He could probably assume Haneul was studying or something and the other two were knocked out, children being unable to be awake for very long.

He sighed as he scratched his itching nose and gazed around the well-near-empty streets, save the occasional drunk or workers of the same hours as himself.

Work was everything but slow, as always. Obviously, as an exotic dancer, he should’ve expected that. He really thought he’d made it clear to the manager that he had to be home early to put his kids to bed and give Eunbyul her first out of five pep talks before she starts kindergarten for the first time ever in a week, but maybe he didn’t remember. He’ll put his money on that, Seokjin was always preoccupied with everything in the club and the additional two other locations. Being a considerate manager and good owner is hard work, after all. His forgetfulness caused Jimin to be overbooked and end his shift two hours later than he’d requested. At least he was getting paid very well for that, anyway, so he had next to no complaints.

Checking his phone, he saw 5 collective texts from his friends, Yoongi and Taehyung. These were two childhood best friends of his, every summer when he would visit his grandma in Seoul he would hang out with them. They were both neighbors from Daegu and would go to Seoul for the summer for the same reason Jimin did which caused his grandmother to meet them. A chance encounter leading to a life-long friendship. Taehyung, however, moved away to become an art major at NYU and Yoongi had followed behind, falling victim to Taehyung’s prettily warpped descriptions of the city. He was a kindergarten teacher and assumed the same role in the states and Taehyung became a critically acclaimed, wildly successful painter. Taehyung actually had children of his own in his time in New York and his twins were the same age as Eunbyul. He, however, was married to their mother, and happily too. For that, he always felt jealousy, despite not wanting to.

Tapping the notification to see all the texts displayed, he saw Yoongi whining about the fact that the first day of school is way too close for comfort and Taehyung’s smiley face reply to Jimin’s own “i’m going home now, if i don’t text you that i’m home within 20 minutes, use find my friends to go after me”. Nothing out of the ordinary. He lived in a crime-filled part of town. He was saving up to be able to buy either a nice enough house close to the school or an apartment of the same caliber in cash. Mortgages seemed messy to him, in all and he was frankly scared to do it.

Now, Yoongi’s whining is normal, but now it has increased tenfold as the news of him getting an assistant teacher was broken to him. Yoongi felt as though the school was insulting his ability to teach by putting another adult in the classroom (they’d assured that he needed an extra hand in the classroom as there were more kids than before in his class–he called bullshit though), but nonetheless, all Jimin could hope for is that he doesn’t “accidentally” show up to class with vodka in a water bottle again. Not after what happened last time.

Locking his phone and walking faster, his longing for the warmth of what he liked to call his “luxury” apartment shining through and suddenly beginning to be extremely prominent which resulted in a whine of I-have-to-walk-like-five-more-steps-to-get-inside-so-life-isn’t-fair escapes Jimin. He stared ahead, gaze landing on the once-silver gate. It was once beautiful, but since the new owners bought it, they paid no attention to outside view, or so he was told by the old lady next door, Janet. They knew everyone went there for the cheap prices anyway, she’d sigh. He really had to move into a house or something. He already had the money for a nice enough house or better apartment where all 4 of them could live happily though his job. Maybe he could look for a house only a few minutes away from the school. Mental note: look for house around school.

Quickly opening and speed walking to the elevator, he checked his phone once again. More drunk texts from the absolute best friend that he loves so very much in this very moment, Yoongi. He really did take his devastation seriously, as he shared a selfie with him and vodka with a text after saying “my news befrenddf!!!!!!!!”. Jimin let out a huff of amusement and disbelief. The man was almost in his late 30s and he still acted like he could be the age of his students.

The unlocking to the apartment was bittersweet. Suppressed memories always seemed to float into his conscious one by one when coming through the door, when silence and darkness met him. That house of cards-like mirage he’d fabricated all on his own tormented him because how could he be so stupid and naïve to believe two children would fix their doomed relationship. He was never happy, not after she barely showed up at home after giving birth. Not after she’d come home often with the stench of alcohol, cigarettes, and sex on her. She was the one who could never be a parent. The one that selfishly left when offered money and riches. The one who didn’t even think twice about accepting the offer. The one that left him for a richer man despite their various kids. The one he’d had to lie to his daughter about when asked of. The one that never thinks of her own kids and has started a new life with brand new kids and husband. The one that’s too late to fix things. The one he and his teenage son loathe with every fiber of their being.

He really had to move away to a nicer place. Sighing, he dragged his boot cladded feet along the living room towards his room to begin his night routine. His two jobs relied on his face and his body, so taking care of both was extremely important, mental stability somewhat important too. He kicked off his shoes and snaked out of his clothes, took his pj’s, and padded towards the bathroom. The most relaxing parts of the day for him were most simply when he saw his kids in the morning and taking a shower after being in a packed and hot night club, full of dried sweat which gave him a not-so-pleasant stench. Eunbyul just knew her daddy was a dancer; she didn’t need to know the explicit details. At least not until the age of thirteen, or maybe older (he hoped), when her very own older brother found out.

He scrubbed every inch of his body until his skin turned red because god, he could not stand the stench just rolling off him in waves. Now, he was fine. He was happy, scent of the bubblegum body wash Eunbyul insisted on buying filling his senses. He was finally home, and his daughter was turning a new chapter in her life. She was going to learn how to read and he would teach her the same things he’d taught her brother. How he loved that, the feeling of satisfaction reached after your child now knows something they didn’t before. He loves the way her eyes light up when she learns something. He loves it all, and he hopes it’ll last forever.

He remembered he should probably invest in a car and a house closer to the school, a 30-minute walk was no joke. He finally dragged his fatigued fingers to set the reminder.

© princegguk — all rights reserved. reposting/modifying of any medium and translations are not allowed.

[seodami]

Neon green | LYY

Genre: soulmate au, fluff, friends to lovers, some frustrated feelings,...

Warning: none (besides cursing like 2 times)

Word count: 4071 (oopsie hehe)

Pairing: Trainee!Liu Yangyang x reader

Note: I am so excited for participating in the ✨NCT secret Santa event✨ I want to thank the organizers @neoculturechristmas for preparing such a cool collaboration! It is such a nice idea and I am really excited to read all the other stories. I really tried making it a bit winter themed in the beginning but oh well I think i failed haha. But if you squint ITS THERE I SWEAR :)) So this one is for you @theleemark :) I really hope you like it! Merry Christmas ✨

“Yangyang stop it!” You laughed while running away from the boy, who currently was chasing you like a maniac through the park. His arms were loaded with dozens of big white snowballs just ready to be thrown at you.

Your feet felt like they were sinking even further into the deep snow layer on the ground with each step you took. It was impossible to avoid your best friend any longer. And before you could complain further, the ice cold snow ball hit you right on your already pink cheek.

You let out a loud scream, not being able to move. The prickling pain of the cold snow overwhelming your senses.

Yangyang however couldn’t stop laughing looking at your face. Running the last few meters to you to catch up, he tackled you down into a hug, which unfortunately ended with both of you laying in the deep snow. Your jeans were soaking wet at this point. An icy feeling shuttered down your spine.

“Yangyaanggg...god I hate you.” You fumed frustratedly, hitting your best friends chest. “Get off me! You are heavy...” your weak arms tried to lift the boy above you up but bitterly failed.

Yangyang giggled into your neck, standing up by himself while helping you up as well. “Hey I’m not heavy. More like heavenly, don’t you think?” He wiggled his eyebrows teasingly with his usual smile as he posed like a supermodel.

As hard as you tried to keep pouting and stay angry at him, you couldn’t stop the laugh from bubbling up behind your hands. A grin immediately made its way onto his face. “Isn’t snow so dope? Like you can literally do anything you want. It’s like a movie.” He babbled excitedly.

You couldn’t help but secretly admire his beauty once again. Lately you’ve been catching yourself a lot staring mindlessly at him when he was busy. Even when it was just him pouring boiling water into a ramen cup. Maybe it was all the mushy lovey dovey Christmas romance content on Netflix you’ve been simping over the last month or just Yangyang himself but you were certainly sure, he definitely got more attractive in your eyes.

Still it was something you would never ever in your dreams confess to him or talk about. Especially since there wasn’t really any sign that you two were connected as soulmates. He was just...well...just your best friend. And you had to live with that.

You still remember the way you two became friends. It was a very fond memory of yours and little do you know, also for Yangyang. You both were in 5th grade back then, being the little Chinese kid who showed off his tiny German skills and the clumsy half Caucasian girl with braces. It was hilarious how well you two got along besides the differences.

You two were in the age were kids began to talk about soulmates and their soulmate connections. From writing on the arm to body switches or color blindness, everything was there. In school you briefly have learned about all the indicators and the bond itself, but you seemed to always be the odd one out. There had been no sign whatsoever. Nowhere on your body. Nothing. Niente.

It was frustrating at first. You found yourself way too often admiring older girls who already found their soulmate or had unique indicators. You were quite jealous of them back then.

But then you found out you weren’t the only person without a soulmate connection. There was Yangyang, who went through the exact same emotions as you did. Even if he didn’t want to admit it, he didn’t want to be lonely.

And that is how you two bonded immediately. After this, you were always together. You acted as if you were glued together, never leaving ones side. You felt safe around each other.

Adults always told you to wait and see. That yours would come sooner or later. But nothing. 9 years later and you and Yangyang still haven’t found your soulmate or anything related to soulmates. It still frustrated you at times but being the positive person you were, you just accepted it with the time.

From time to time a lot of people happened to mistaken you two for soulmates. It always made you think ‘what if’...

Your poor heart already had been through so much because of this boy. It wasn’t easy to ignore your small crush on him starting back in 7th grade. You were both growing and having loads of hormonal crises, so it was understandable at some point. But seeing that this crush hasn’t gotten any less since then, you were just totally lost.

‘Stop it y/n! He is not your soulmate! He is not...’

You snapped yourself out of your daydreams and staring as you found Yangyang smiling brightly at you. “Oh damn y/n, lately you’ve beeen really drifting off with your thoughts.” He noted as he slung one arm around your shoulder, walking with you towards your apartment, making sure to not forget your groceries at the side of the tree.

“I noticed...maybe I should just get some more sleep.” You mumbled in your sweater paws in order to warm up your freezing hands. The boy besides you let out an airy laugh while squeezing your shoulder affectionately. One habit he unconsciously took over, over time.

“Oh yes you should. Weren’t you like playing games up until 4 am last night? You sure you aren’t a zombie by now?” He joked looking over to you, you both nearly choking from air as your eyes met, making your hearts race a bit faster.

You nodded quickly focusing on the snow on the ground again. “I kinda suck. How do you sleep at 12 am already? You’re a wonder kid.”

He shrugged his shoulders, still watching you. “It’s in my genes to be a wonder kid.” His joke made you giggle slightly. Yangyang was as always Yangyang. And you found it incredibly charming. You could never deny that.

After the short walk from the snow covered park to your apartment with all of your hands filled with full grocery bags, you decided to bake some Christmas cookies before Yangyang had to head back to his shared apartment. Ever since he began training in SM entertainment as a trainee, he hadn’t that much time like he did before. But either way, you were incredibly proud of him and always happy to spend some quality time with him.

You were lucky that none of your roommates were home, visiting family over the holidays or hanging out with their partners.

It was probably the best that you were alone because you both made a whole mess in the kitchen. It was so much fun hanging out after a long time but it was a hell of a ride to clean it all up.

When the moon was already at its highest point and the night air got even fresher and chillier, Yangyang hugged you goodbye with butterflies dancing in his stomache. He would always treasure these moments with you and think about them again when he was so hardly trying to fall asleep. It was like his mind was full of you 24/7. Even if he tried staying focused on his tasks, it would most of the times end up with him thinking about your laugh and smile as you sat on the couch next to each other while making fun of the twilight characters.

He wanted to scream in his pillow how devestatingly in love he was with you at this point. You made him just so overly happy. He wanted to be near you so bad.

And people noticed. They noticed how Yangyang showed his deepest hidden personalities only to you. His playful and quirky side but also his soft and vulnerable. He simply could be himself around yourself. And you felt exactly the same. You would tell him even your deepest secrets. You knew he would keep them safe.

Yangyang was surprised to see his fellow roommates and friends still awake in the living room as he arrived home. Ten, Hendery and Lucas were all sprawled out on the couch, seemingly waiting for sleep to take over them. The flat was confusingly quiet despite the slight background noice of the TV.

“Hey guys I’m back! Why are you still awake?” It was silent for a short while before Hendery suddenly stood in front of him, making him jump by surprise.

The older boy watched him with a growing smirk and exciting twinkling eyes. “And? Did you tell her? Please say yes, we all stayed awake just to hear the news.”

Yangyang let out a sigh, he didn’t know he was holding and stripped out of his jacket. He knew this question would come but not this soon. “Just let me breathe for a second alright? I’m gonna tell you everything.”

Ten in the background let out an excited scream. “Yangyang! You did it? Ohh finally manning up and confessing...I see.” The teasing but excited tone in his voice was as clear as daylight.

“What? No... it’s not like that...” Yangyang tried to explain the situations to his friends as he walked inside heading towards the living room with Hendery behind him.

Groans came from all sides. “You didn’t?! Oh man I really thought you finally would. What are you afraid of?” The older boys words stung inside of the youngest. He shrugged his shoulders sitting besides Lucas on the couch, grabbing the nearest pillow.

“I don’t know. Like I really don’t know. She’s absolutely amazing and so stunning but...” he placed his head on the pillow with a deep sigh. “But...I feel like I’m just a coward. Just thinking about that we probably are not soulmates or never be an actual couple. It all sucks. I wish I could just tell her...”

All the boys were deep in their thoughts as they listened carefully to Yangyang sorrows and worries. They knew they needed to help the kid in some kind of way. This had been the fifth day he decided to confess but all the prior nights turned out to be a failure. He just wanted his heart to be opened by the one person he loves the most. But it felt like there was a thick layer of securing foam around it, just waiting to be ripped away. If it was just that easy...

“Hey...I know this might sound stupid but since you seem pretty lost...I might have an idea how it will be easier for you to overcome yourself.” Lucas suddenly interrupted his train of thoughts, smiling brightly at his roommates. “Oh lord...please don’t say something stupid.” Ten prayed next to him with his hand holding his forehead.

“Tell me more.”

And that was how the plan was born.

A bulletproof plan in Lucas and Henderys eyes.

And a totally stupid one in Ten’s opinion.

But Yangyang did it anyways.

Cause he was desperate, frustrated and so full of love, it was impossible for him to think 100% straight. And he did it only for you. With the intention of getting your attention in the fullest way.

It was dyeing your hair. In freaking neon green. Cause what’s a better way to show your feelings than dying your hair in your crushes favorite color?

A lot actually. But Hendery and Lucas were absolutely confident that it had something to do with the human psyche and the law of attraction or whatever they called it. Their belief: you will fall for him immediately by the time you see his hair.

The only problem with this was that this plan was obviously not thought through yet and that the only hair coloring product in this house that came the closest to your favorite color, which was green, was a bright neon green. Yuta brought it over once for Ten to dye his Neon green highlights. And Yuta indeed could pull it off.

But Yangyang began to regret ever listening to his older friends again. He looked ridiculous. Looking himself with a frown in the mirror of the bathroom at 3 am was definitely not how he imagined this day to end.

Lucas lightly joked that he at least looked somehow christmasy. But then on the other hand Hendery couldn’t stop laughing about his own joke that he found his list highlighter. It was a mess. Ten wouldn’t even want to look at his hair and when he did, all he could say was “I told you”. It was even more frustrating.

All he could do now was sleep and wish it all just had been a dream. He didn’t really had the urge anymore to show you his hair. All he wanted to do was think about you laughing and running in the snow earlier today. And he really nearly forgot his hair dilemma for the night.

You on the other hand decided to go to sleep earlier that night since you nearly hadn’t gotten any sleep at all because of your assignments for university. It was more than exhausting for you to stay up till morning to finish up all your projects. Yangyang had to force you to go to bed at the end of the day and you didn’t even complain with his soothing voice telling you stories, slowly tugging you to your dream world.

The next morning, you woke up groaning with a heavy headache. One look at your phone and you could see it was 6:30. With a long sigh you fell back into your comfortable pillows, scrolling through your phone. Why did you have to wake up that early again? Right...university.

After what seems definitely too short for your liking, you finally climbed out of your bed, trotting towards the bathroom. There was no sign whatsoever that the headache would just go away by itself.

But as soon as you looked at yourself in the mirror, you let out a deafening scream. Your heart was thrumming as fast as never before and your adrenaline was rushing through your whole body. You couldn’t find a way to properly breathe at that exact moment.

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god... please let this be a dream. Nonononono. Fuck.” You mumbled to yourself while your hands searched for support at the border of the sink.

Your eyes met in the mirror in front of you. Neon green eyes. Neon fucking green. That... that was not good.

There were so many questions in your mind all at once. But one thing was sure. You wouldn’t set a single step outside of this apartment. No one could ever see you like that. You looked like a monster. As you tried rubbing your eyes continuously or trying to find a contact lenses inside of them, you came to the conclusion that you were damned.

There were many possible explanations:

1. You somehow slept too less or have some sort of hallucination due to whatever.

2. Yangyang played a prank on you and is just waiting for you to call him.

3. You suddenly have gotten a really rare disease or disability over night.

Or the most likely one (except for Yangyang and his prank maybe)

4. You just found your soulmate connection.

Your eyes widen with realization and shock, as you came to the conclusion that this could be your possible soulmate indicator. You have learned so much about them in school and by yourself that you could easily tell what it was.

It was a rare connection. But it was possible. Having your soulmates hair color as your eye color. You were 80% sure that was the reason.

The other 20% you just thought about Yangyang. How he couldn’t be your soulmate. He would have told you that he was planning to dye his hair in NEON GREEN. What in the world was this even for a hair color?

You sat down on the floor to grasp your wilding thoughts and sort out your over rushing emotions. You couldn’t pinpoint why, but your thoughts drifted off to said boy every two seconds. It made no sense at all but your subconscious probably just wanted to tell you how stupid your feelings for the Chinese boy were. He still was your best friend of many many years. You knew this day would come. The day you would finally realize that you were no soulmates. Despite all your deepest wishes.

The whole situation was nearly ironic. Neon green eyes? That could only happen to you.

With wobbly legs you waddled over to your bedroom to pick up your phone. The blood from your hands nearly disappeared all at once and left your fingers cold as ice. You pressed Yangyangs caller ID without even thinking. You knew it was still very early and it was his free day but this was definitely an emergency.

Unconsciously you began biting your finger nails nervously, trying to think straight but failed. Everything was all over the place.

After the nth peeping tone, you could hear some dampened muffles on the other side. “Y/n? Why is- are you calling?” You heard the boys broken morning voice through the speaker, gently tugging on your heartstrings. Your heart wasn’t ready for this that early.

“Uhm...I ...well Yangyang? I kind of have a big problem and I cannot leave the house. Can you...if it isn’t too much trouble... I mean come over? I just- I really don’t know what to do...” you rambled on, not knowing what to say in a situation like that. He had to see it himself to understand. God that was awful.

More ruffling could be heard, followed by damp footsteps. “Oh...yeah sure. You sound really frustrated Y/n, is everything okay? Should I bring you something?” He questioned you with concern mirroring his voice. You shook your head, remembering he couldn’t see it.

“No it’s fine... I just need some really good advices. Its just weird. You will see when you come.” You explained to him, still biting your finger nails. “Alright I will be there in a bit. I’ll still bring you some chocolate tho, that’s always one solution.” Yangyang tried to lift up your seemingly worried mood, succeeding immediately and earning a chuckle from you.

“Thank you. You are the best. See you soon.” The line went dead and left you with a more comforting feeling than before. You were still sure everyone looking at you would scream out loud but at least Yangyang was there for you and could buy you contacts or whatever. You were always thankful to have someone like him in your life.

Not half an hour later, said boy rang the bell to your apartment. You prayed to god that none of your roommates got up because of the noice. You wouldn’t want anyone to see you like this... except for Yangyang.

In a hurry you put on a pair of sunglasses, you found on your dresser before running to the door to let him in. It wasn’t your intention to scare him away in the beginning, even though you know he would never.

The Chinese boy looked tired when you opened the door but you could still see the worry written on his face. He wore a black beanie and his long padded jacket. He looked absolutely adorable for you in that moment. But realization hit you when you couldn’t see any differences from yesterday. The heavy feeling immediately made its way to your heart. You felt horrible. You were right, he couldn’t be your soulmate. How stupid you were...

“Y/n what’s the problem? Why are you wearing sunglasses? Did you hurt your eye? Did someone hit you?!” Yangyang lowkey panicked. You dragged him inside, leaving him no time to remove most of his clothing items besides his dirty shoes.

You pulled him into your room exhaling deeply while pushing him gently on your bed to sit down. You stood in front of him still with your sunglasses on.

“I...I found out my soulmate indicator. I did right this morning.”

There was an indefinable silence in the air for a second. There was a slight drop in the boys facial expression. His heart ripped open like a bag of candy. Spilling all his content. “Wha-what...” was all he could mutter. His gaze drifting off to your feet, trying to get his thoughts straight.

“I don’t know I just...woke up like this...please don’t scream.” You scrambled nervously, taking off your sunglasses slowly and revealing your neon green eyes to him.

His mouth dropped immediately. With hammering heart and shaking hands he subconsciously reached for his beanie. If his emotions would ride the wildest rollercoaster, it would be this moment right now. Everything was all over the place but his heart lead it’s way.

Your big eyes fixated on the neon green mop of hair on top of Yangyangs head. It was hard not to forget how to breathe in that moment. “Yangyang...” you whispered softly, stepping closer and reaching for his hair, which was exact the same color as your eyes. “You...what?! Why didn’t you tell me? I was so... worried.”

He looked into your eyes, not finding fear or shock, no, there was happiness in them. Pure happiness, which surprised you immensely. There was a small smile on his lips. “Worried about what?” He reached for your hand. Emotions spilling over the top.

You sat down next to him, turning your body towards him. The blood was rushing so loud through your ears, it was hard to focus on your own thoughts. It was now or never y/n!

“About having someone else as a soulmate than... you. God it sounds so cheesy but it’s true.” You chuckled nervously wanting to chew on your nails but being stopped by Yangyang. His smile grew even bigger, letting it impossible for you not to smile.

He suddenly pulled you into a tight hug, giggling like a child. Your hands searching grip on his fluffy jacket. A warm feeling spread through your whole body. You felt wonderful. Like all sorts of sorrows and worries had been taken away from you. Immediately.

“I’m so so so happy Y/n... so happy.” He mumbled joyfully in your shoulder. He squeezed your body tight. “I wanted to confess to you. So many times. God I really fell hard for you and now I know why.”

He looked into your eyes once again, surpressing a laugh but still sending you heart eyes.

“I’m sorry but you really look ridiculous. I’m so sorry about that. I had no idea.” You nodded playfully glaring at him but still leaning closer into his touch, wanting to be even closer to him. It was a weird feeling. But everything just made sense to you now. Every single moment and feeling in the past. It was all because of your soulmate connection. You were soulmates all along and you never had a clue.

“Oh you better dye that hair back right now to black or you wait for neon pink eyes yourself.” You warned him playfully. “Even though you look like a Christmas tree... I mean it’s kinda cute.” You admitted playing with his hair in hope for him not to see your incoming blush.

Yangyang grinned to himself, unable to hold back his emotions as he saw your pinky cheeks from the compliment. He felt so giddy suddenly. “Hendery and Lucas were absolutely convinced that you would fall for me easier when I’d dye my hair in your favorite color. Unfortunately they only had neon green one left at this point in time. Please remind me to never trust them again. That was a horrible idea.”

Your heart swelled up by his words. “You did this because of me? Oh Yangyang...” your hand went to his arm. You would lie if you didn’t feel flattered in this moment. “You’re such an idiot... but a very very cute one.” You smiled at him in awe, “I appreciate it. But by all means please let us dye it back.” You both began to fall into a fit of laughter, unable to stop.

“Deal. This hair and your eyes should be banned from this country.” And with that you could proudly say that you finally found your soulmate. The person you were in love with all along. Your best friend and partner in crime. Liu Yangyang.

[youarejesting]

Hope in the Sheets.4

[Masterlist]

Beta: N/A Pairing: Hoseok x Reader Genre: Friendship, Comedy, Soft boy, Fluff, SMUT, Friends2Lovers,

Summary: You held many titles: his neighbor, colleague, wing-man… well, more likely a wing-woman, yet most importantly, you were his best friend. You had been friends since you were born. Between the two of you, you were younger; barely, but he never let you forget it. He always seemed to ruffle your hair and tease you, which could get rather annoying but he made up for it by treating you to things. What if a drunken one night stand between you and your best friend Hoseok leads to more complicated situations? Your reckless twenties are cut short as you find yourself suddenly responsible for something a little more.

Warning: Reference to a previous sexual encounter, pregnancy, Toxic Family.

You were sitting at the bar drinking your fourth glass of orange juice, the sweet citrus flavour was really hitting the spot. Laying your head onto the polished shiny wood you could see the dance floor lit completely. Jimin swept the floor and mopped it diligently, of course they cleaned up thoroughly when they closed the bar but Jimin prefers to clean again. 

You felt a fondness blooming in your chest watching Jimin dancing around with the mop in hand. Yoongi was setting up and testing each speaker individually and testing out his equipment.

There were two hours left before the bar opened and Seokjin began ordering some food, Jimin got a text as he was putting the mop and now empty bucket away. Yoongi leaned over to read it —That guy had no shame— “Hoseok is on his way over”

“Really?” You asked a little nervous to see Hoseok so soon, you hadn’t even figured things out, you weren’t ready to see him. 

“You sound surprised but we have pizza night every second friday” Namjoon smiled exiting the staff room, smelling clean and fresh his hair combed back. 

A part of you happy for the oncoming pizza boxes heading your way. Seokjin began by placing a container in front of you, you opened it excited. A large part of you hoping it was some fried chicken, only to see plainly seasoned roast chicken and vegetables. 

Seokjin had already started acting protective, reading the pamphlets and telling you, you can’t have barbeque, raw fish, deli meats or soft cheese. So you were enviable of their pepperoni cheese heaven.

“We haven’t had pizza night since before the renovations behind the bar, did you see the difference compare to last month when you had come in?” Namjoon added unmoving as Jimin gracefully spun around him heading towards the door unlocking it for Hoseok to come in when he arrived. 

“I don’t really remember much about that night and what I do know I have tried to repress” You couldn’t help but pout looking at the plate of beans, you could eat most veggies but beans were the worst. You pushed the plate away and Seokjin pushed it back and you looked up with puppy dog eyes and he shook his head.

“He could not have been that bad,” Yoongi said, missing the exchange between the two of you, especially the way you were making rude gestures to the manager. “I have danced with Hoseok, he knows how to grind.”

“What’s all this?” Namjoon said, sitting at the table and looking over the pamphlets Seokjin was reading. “Who is pregnant?”

“I didn’t want to tell you?” Seokjin looked at Namjoon his lips pursed the way they do when he tries to keep a straight face, “but I am pregnant”

“Haha, guys can’t get pregnant” A small voice chuckled and you saw a familiar face. He was freshly showered and looking well dressed in black boots pants and button up. 

“Oh everyone this is Jeon Jungkook, Seokjin and I hired him to help with the door and any rough housing” He gave a nervous smile, looking around. He opened his mouth to talk when the front door opened. Jungkook turned squaring his shoulders only to be deflated by Jimin carrying drinks “Jungkook sit down this is Hoseok”

You smiled pulling out your seat to the left and gesturing for Jungkook to sit. Hoseok faltered whilst removing his jacket for a moment, questioning why you had let Jungkook sit on your left. Genuinely sorry, you gave him an apologetic look. He laughed and walked across to the bar where he pulled out a pair of your spare shoes from his bag and placed them in the staff room. You found out last time that he was the one leaving your shoes at the bar but to actually see him do it was really sweet.

“Do you work here as well Noona?” The apprentice bouncer asked pulling your attention away from your neighbor and best friend.

“No, I just stop by every Friday for pizza night” 

“But you're not eating pizza?” He raised an eyebrow. 

“I will trade you some beans for a slice” you grinned and he nodded picking up a slice and turning to you and freezing “um… maybe not”

“No, you need to eat healthier,” Seokjin argued. 

“But they are disgusting!” You whined letting your head fall back. 

“Eat them or no ice cream” He stood up heading behind the bar for a tub of ice cream that was used for special cocktails. 

“ice cream?” You almost gave yourself whiplash with how fast your head lifted. 

“Eat the beans and you get ice cream!” He said sternly and Hoseok moved around the table and stole a bean. “And no help from Hoseok” huffing and putting them in your mouth grumbling as you chewed. 

“That wasn’t so bad was it?” He said

“I hate it, the texture is wrong, it’s not food”

“But you did it, so what ice cream would you like?”

“Cookie dough?”

“Can’t have raw egg, I got chocolate, vanilla and strawberry”

“We have coffee too…” Jimin’s voice died out with the glare Seokjin gave. 

“This house is a prison” you frowned, throwing a stray bean at Seokjin and he laughed handing you a bowl of chocolate ice cream. 

“Hey are we partying tonight?” Hoseok asked around a mouth full or pizza, how could he be so damn handsome even when he is doing the weirdest things. “Ah but you haven’t gotten changed from your work uniform”

“No, I am just having dinner and heading home, tonight” you sighed “doctors orders”

“Oh well I guess, we can go out another night or something” he said being polite and waiting for you to talk about your doctor's appointment, Hoseok never pried with things like this. Jungkook was a charming young man and Yoongi asked for a dance. 

It was Yoongi’s version of bonding, he held your waist and gently moved to the music and you laid your head on his chest. “You okay?” He asked the gravel in his voice was almost purr like and woke you from your daze. 

“Just tired” the words mumbled as you hugged his torso, his heart beating a steady rhythm. 

“You are thinking too much, no more thinking tonight, just go home and get some rest and think some more tomorrow” pulling away he looked you in the eyes taking your face in his hands he kissed your forehead. “I will support you and your body no matter the decision”

“Thanks Yoongi, I decided I’m not going to get the prescription. I think a part of me already loves them way too much” touching your lower belly, allowing yourself to be a little excited, if only for the moment. 

You were worried and you should be. This was a big deal, but something about the support the boys gave you made it almost exciting. You began to day dream about a baby just like Hobi running around your apartment and cringed, taking the child to school on the bus before going to work. 

Blanching at the thought, you needed to put the baby first and your life right now wasn’t good enough to support a family. It was time to stop thinking single and start thinking like a mother. 

Maybe Yoongi was right, it was time to stop thinking, get through the night and plan everything tomorrow. With you in tow Yoongi led you back to the other, he placed your hand in Hoseoks and told him to take you home. 

Hoseok nodded getting your coats and thanking them all for dinner, he reassured Jungkook he was in good hands and told him to relax. Hoseok helped you dutifully into your coat looking longingly at the bar you frowned feeling bad for him. 

He took your hand in his warm one and walked you to the door opening it for you like a gentleman. He noticed how miserable you seemed and took your hand racing down the sidewalk until he arrived at a small convenience store. 

“Wait here.” He turned to you and paused looking you over with a smile “you look really pretty today”

You visibly reddened a considerable amount enough so that Hoseok noticed grinning and ran into the shop. Watching his head pop up over the aisles as he ran back and forth, you had no clue what he was looking for but clearly he did as he raced back and forth not once appearing lost.

He emerged with a biodegradable bag filled with an assortment of midnight snacks. He opened the bag letting you peek inside. “I got all your favourites, we can go home and watch some late night telly or one of your favourite movies” 

Your mood skyrocketed. Grasping his hand, swinging it enthusiastically on the way home. Hoseok stepped between you and a group of men smoking and drinking on a bench. He gave them a curt but polite ‘good evening’ and continued guiding you along. 

The two of you made it to the door seeing the door had been pried open. “Again, I hate this stupid appartment, let’s hope they got bored before they reached our apartments.”

They got to their doors and thankfully noticed that they were not broken into. “We need to add a few more locks on the doors.”

“Or you know move” You laughed

“Come on the rent is almost nonexistent and the pizza shop is in sight, what else do two bachelors need in their lives.” He laughed flopping onto your couch and grinning at you upside down.

You placed the snacks into a bowl and placed it on the coffee table as Hoseok began flipping through the channels. “Knocked up is on you wanna watch that?”

The scene that happened to play was at the restaurant where Katherine Heigl announces she is pregnant and the father makes a witty clueless remark.

“No thank you,” Your tone was clipped and he thankfully changed the channel.

“Yeah it’s a bit overplayed. What about Juno, it just started?” He shrugged

“Nah,” You said, sitting beside Hoseok laying against him and closing your eyes to push back tears you were overwhelmed.

“Animation numbness?” He asked, turning on your Disney plus you laid there without opening your eyes “anything?’

“Yes” He put on his favourite ‘Peter Pan’ and pulled you up to lay against his chest sensing you were not quite alright. He sang cutely in your ear along to ‘We’re following the leader’ with the children on the television.

You got to the part where Wendy sings ‘You’re mother and mine’ before the tears started to fall. Hoseok noticed the way your chest shook against his and sat up. “Hey Little Darling, tell me what is wrong.”

“Everything.” You sniffed burying your face into his chest and he patted your head threading his hand through your hair soothing the raging emotions.

“Tell me little darling,” He whispered softly, trying to calm you and give the support you need. “Is it about the doctors, are you sick, is something wrong?”

“No nothing, it’s fine,” The finality in your voice made him go quiet, of course he was upset but he respected your decision and just held you. “I think... I might go to bed.”

The abruptness of your decision made him sit up, “Are you sure, I can stay and I won’t pry”

“I really should sleep, this is something I have to figure out by myself and then I can talk to you okay,” You said standing and he nodded standing grabbing his coat and heading to the door. Before you could shut the door he turned pulling you into a hug. 

“I am here for you okay, don’t try to do it on your own, not when I am here and willing to help you, okay” he looked at you grabbing your shoulder and making sure your eyes would meet his before he continued “I will be by your side no matter what, trust me okay. I love you sleep well”

You would be lying if that I love you didn’t hit a little different, you nodded “Thank you Hoseok let me process and then we can talk okay.” Shutting and locking the door you began taking a few deep breaths. There was undeniable comfort from Hoseok’s words and it made you believe everything was okay. 

Taking out your phone with shaky hands you searched for a name you hadn’t contacted in a long time, even their name in your phone was mocking you. You clicked ‘Mum’ followed by the small phone icon before placing the phone to your ear.

Your hands trembling, you didn’t know what to do. You heard your mother answer with her familiar underlying snobbish greeting. 

“Good evening?”

“Hey Mum,” You caught yourself before your voice cracked, never giving your mother the satisfaction, “What are you doing?”

“Nothing, what do you need?” Her voice clipped and you bit your lip trying not to fight, this wasn’t why you were calling. You journeyed into the bathroom feeling a little sick, your mother always brought your anxiety back ten fold.

“Nothing, I was just wanting to tell you…” You squared your shoulders and stared at yourself in the mirror. It was a challenge, you were telling yourself to be a proverbial man. “I am pregnant.”

“Of course you are, you wasted your college degree by becoming a carny and now you are pregnant. I was waiting for you to stuff your life up more. And what now you need money, to help get rid of the thing, come home and we will take care of it. Maybe this will be a reminder to keep your legs shut”

“What the fuck is wrong with you, I am an adult don’t ever contact me again, because I sure as hell am never going to” You hung up placing your phone down and the sickness faded like a weight off your shoulders your mother was not a part of the equation.

Walking to the kitchen you sat on the breakfast bar stool and pulled out a book and began writing out a plan. There were things you needed to do. Of course telling Hoseok was important but you were planning without him. Because if he rejected you and this baby well then you were on your own.

It was always best to plan for the worst case scenario. A better house; the baby cannot live in a broken down high theft studio apartment. A drivers license; you definitely couldn’t take the child to school on the bus everyday before going to work and as for work you needed a serious job. You paused; these were the first important things.

Opening your laptop you began looking at houses and loans, saving tabs and looking at a driving school, there was no time to party. Texting Seokjin ideas he told you he would help you with some of the lessons and you were grateful that he would help you.

[Jimin: Hey, I thought...] [Jimin: And feel free to stop me but...] [Y/n: Spit it out Jiminie] [Jimin: I might have a better job for you, I just thought that the theme park would be too physical and at somepoint you won’t be able to lift and such.] [Y/n: Oh wow, I hadn’t thought about the lifting and standing business but I did think I would need more money and a real job, what do you have in mind?] [Jimin: You are qualified for it and it is a desk job, that pays well.]

You kind of felt good about everything, Jimin gave you an application for the desk job and depending on what you heard back you would have to give your two weeks notice at the theme park.

[Jin: As tomorrow is Saturday, How about your first driving lesson?] [Y/n: I mean sure, I have booked in to see the Realestate and I have filled out papers for a home loan, I can’t live here, it isn’t safe for a child.] [Jin: I will be there in the morning and I will drop off some healthy meals...] [Jin: I am slaving away in this kitchen so you better eat them.] [Jin: We don’t want the little one getting hungry, okay?] [Y/n: Okay, I get it. We will drive and look at houses tomorrow don’t be late] [Jin: I am never late.]

Seokjin was really getting into his role as fake father. But it made you feel like you had some sort of support behind you and that made you happy. You were exhausted laying on your single bed and decided not to dwell on things any more that evening. 

The next morning Seokjin knocked on your door, upon opening he looked at you with horrified eyes, “Your front door has been smashed in, why do you still live here?” He huffed placing bags on the bench, “you better understand that I love you, look at all these dinners I prepared”

“Thank you Jin, for everything, I really can’t thank you enough right now” You hugged him and he held you a little longer than normal perhaps waiting for you to break down.

“Are you ready to go?” Seokjin said, opening the front door to reveal Hoseok standing there looking absolutely confused.

“Go where?” His voice croaked a little evidence of his recent rising.

“We are looking at houses” You said nonchalantly, “Do you want to come?”

“Sure let me get dressed,” He ran back inside and Seokjin looked at you cautiously and you nodded. The three of you got into the car and Seokjin began instructing you to drive and you were doing pretty well even Hoseok who is scared of almost everything was calm.

You all spent the day looking and discussing houses and your price range and the possibility of a home loan, Hoseok just listened. He seemed amazed by the length you were going to, just to get a home or at least that’s what it felt like.

You looked at different houses and you knew which one you could afford but you couldn’t help but dream about one of the more expensive ones that they had accidentally showed you. Even Seokjin and Hoseok saw you smile when you looked at the places.

The last house you looked at was overrun with grass weeds and trees, garbage in the yard, a broken window and everything needed fixing but it was the cheapest.

The neighbourhood wasn’t bad, but the plumbing was, there was no electricity either which meant you had a lot of work cut out for you. Nothing could compare to your dream house, it had french doors to a back porch and a large backyard with a neat garden.

After inspecting each property you went back to the real estate office and stood outside in the fresh breeze while the agent made a few calls about your loan flexibility. Seokjin went to get coffee from the Cafe just down the road and to enter the real estate office when Hoseok grabbed your arm gently and blushed apologetically, “Hey can we talk just really quick?”

“Sure Hobi,” Your eyes scanned his sheepish form and he opened his mouth but quickly shut it, “What is it?”

“Is it about the break in, I can totally understand if it is, We can find a new place together, something nicer, and with more space in a better neighbourhood.” He looked flustered he wanted to express so much he was fumbling over his words, “Just I don’t want it to be cause of something else, I don’t want it to be about me, or something I have done”

“Hoseok, I have something to tell you,” Your heart was beating out of your chest, “I got some news from the doctor and well I have to get my life in order because this is serious Hoseok”

“Oh god!” He clutched you in his arms, “Don’t say you are dying, please anything but that, I can’t live without you”

“No Hobi, I am pregnant, I have to get my life in order, I can’t raise a baby in a broken studio eating tinned food, I need a proper job and house and…” He pulled back to look at you in a mix of shock and relief “I am scared, and alone”

“You are pregnant, like really pregnant?”

“Yes, and I am pretty much disowned too, so I have no help from home and have I said I was scared because I am shaking” You sniffed tears falling and he held you

"I will be there for you" He smiled, “We can get a house together and raise a baby. Wait. Who did this?” 

“I got you a smoothie cause you can’t have Coffee” Seokjin smiled handing a coffee to Hoseok and a smoothie for you. You saw Hoseok’s eyes slid to Seokjin and flick back to yours.

“Him?”

It looked like Hoseok was about to punch him when the Agent stepped out and guided us back into the office, I spoke with the bank and they said you are only eligible for the broken down bomb site of a home.

But amongst the deadly glares of Hoseok and the disappointment on Seokin’s face at the bank’s refusal to lend any more he went to speak. “What about if I add a Ten thousand dollar deposit?”

“No, No deposit I will take it. I have some time to fix it and I intend to.”

“You can’t live there, it is creepy.” Hoseok said

“I can and I will, I have to make a safe environment for a baby Hobi, I can’t sit around in our apartment and wait for someone to stab me in my sleep, I have fate in my hands and I am taking it” You walked into the realtors office and signed the forms, the house was now yours.

You sighed stepping out of the realtors and Seokjin said, “the boys and I will help you clean up”

“I can get some of the guys from work” Hoseok said, appearing more like he was trying to outdo Seokjin, instead of genuinely helping. Either way you were thankful for their help.

The clean up was going to be a huge task and you needed all the help you could get.

Tags: @brbkpop​​​ @take-u-2-an0ther-w0r1d​​​ @munchyn​​​ @unadulteratedlyunique​​​ @jinhitwhore​​​  @knjkitten​​

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[amachaheadcanons]

CAN YOU GIVE FLUFFY HEADCANONS FOR AMACHA ON DATES??

YOU BET YOUR FINE BOOTY I CAN ANON

(⊙ω⊙✿) Me likes the way you think!!

Fluffy Headcanon Set of Amacha on Dates

You might wanna be sitting for this...there's a lot...

They study hard for an hour and a half before a well-deserved break, in which Rantaro starts cooking up a storm. Tenko insists on helping since he refused to take her money. "Tenko's sure you just want her to pay a high price! Tch, typical--"

Their first date is accidental. She came over to study/work on a school project/get tutored. Considering one of his father's Japan-based houses is close to a train station, the two decide to go there; it was quieter than the dorms.

It's a quaint traditional home for 1, on the larger side in comparison to typical Japanese apartments. Being a quiet, hideyhole for FatherAmami, it was vacant of maids/butlers. Of course, Rantaro cooks dinner for them.

'So that's why Rantaro took so long "getting study snacks" at the supermarket' Tenko realised. This unexpected thoughtful side of his making her soften inside.

"No need, Chabashira-san. Your thanks will be enjoying the meal I slaved away making just for you~." He teases. Despite attempting to refute and ensure he was aware she didn't mind chipping in some money, he refused with no end. Including the train fare and his precious tutoring time. He didn't want anything from her. Though that didn't stop her from asserting he was hiding ulterior motives, nor internally denying the fact she savoured every denial he made whenever she joked about him trying to get in her panties. She appreciated the constant dismissal, while silly, it reassured her; comforted her.

She starts chopping up veggies both spitefully and with pride. The food smells delicious, he can see it on her face despite her verbal denial. They get caught up in cooking and conversation, studying further never gracing their minds. They were too busy enjoying the other's company. He pleasantly surprised her, thus why she continued to launch questions at him.

She speedily sets the table before he can. A little too excited to eat his food.

Because the house is so old, the lights go out. The fuse box is a pain to figure out on an empty stomach, thus why Rantaro breaks out the fancy candles and they eat by candlelight. It's very romantic, Tenko starts to blush as it reminds her of romance manga. Now thankful for the light shortage since he couldn't grasp the extent of her embarrassment.

They talk for hours. By 9pm they're too tired to even attempt studying, and instead finish the night with a Disney movie and tea and biscuits on the pull-out sofa bed. "How luxurious!!"

Tenko's excitement never looked more beautiful/endearing.

Rantarou's dozes off first, his light snoring made her giggle. He was so dainty. She gently lays the blankets he previously prepared over his sleeping form.

Sitting a comfortable distance to finish the movie. A lullaby plays on screen and Tenko is easy prey. She ends up sinking into the bed beside him, the cool autumn air didn't help her sleep-cuddling tendencies, thus making her spoon him for warmth. His sleeping form happily complies and fits in the mould she made.

Both being early risers, Rantarou's embarrassed to be in the situation, but smiles anyway, patting her hair, she instantly stirs, he pretends to be asleep.

When Tenko rubs the sleep from her eyes, she stares at him, their positions exposing she was, in fact, the instigator of such affection. She slowly slides out, utterly embarrassed and completely confused. She gets to work in the kitchen, {even wearing his apron} to surprise him with breakfast in bed. "As thanks" for dinner the night before... He is happily surprised, both at her way of showing gratitude and the feelings making his chest tight at the image of her wearing such domestic accents.

^ Those dinner/study/movie endeavours continue for almost 3 months before he has the guts to invite her to Disneyland, confident she'd love it. She asserts the idea and is all-in after Rantarou confesses the last time he went was with his sisters...he sounded so gloomy whilst reminiscing and she insists they go to restore the happiness it's supposed to invoke!! It'd be a crime otherwise.

He goes all out. He buys them front of the line, year-long passes. They're worth it. This one's the official first date. At least in his head, he tells her it isn't but he wants it to be, and it definitely looks like one.

Tenko is no longer scared or feels threatened around him, not in the slightest. Strangely though, anger stirs inside her chest and makes her lips thin whenever girls fawn/compliment him so boldly.

He waits patiently for Tenko when she's using the bathroom. On her way out, her appreciation is emphasised by a wide grin as he watched her with excited eyes. A stranger crosses their path. Tenko increases her speed, "He better not ditch Tenko for this beautiful and pure ginger fox-- oh how embarrassing that would be!! Not to mention low!"

A girl from school attempts to confess to him, in the happiest, most magical place of all. She's a year younger than them. So pure, kind and sweet. He doesn't have the heart to outright reject her, thus stumbling over his words awkwardly, Tenko can sense he's trying to be gentle.

Tenko smoothly approaches and wraps an arm around his, making him freeze his faltering, "Kasumi-chan. Tenko heard your beautiful speech. You're so brave and sweet and beautiful. Any boy would be lucky to have you, but unfortunately... Rantarou-kun is spoken for." She wants to break it to her as gently as possible, and pretends their dating, as a softer blow. After giving Kasumi the necessary confidence/reassurance, Tenko watches the girl trot back to her friends. A content smile marking her face.

She follows, willingly, paying no mind to the contact whatsoever, excluding the butterflies in her stomach.

With his free hand he pats her head, "Very smooth, Chabashira-san, I'm impressed. I would never have thought you'd-"

"Oh, shoosh avocado!" Avoiding eye contact and hiding her blush. Since their arms were still tangled, Rantaro interlocked their fingers and drags her along, "C'mon, Tiga~"

He showers her in mostly food but of course gifts her something cute she had her eye on.

They have a blast. Afterward, Tenko found herself often speculating when they could go again. Due to his big spending habits she tends to repay her gratitude in free Neo-Aikido training and the rare times she'd make sweets for Himiko, she'd give him a decent portion.

Because Rantaro is so loving and crushing hard but doesn't know how to love her, he often shouts her lunch or packs an extra bento for her. This surprises Tenko.

He's so thoughtful and wonderful she has her suspicions. But still blushes whenever he brings her lunch in public with her friends around.

To combat this, she insists on helping him with his studies and is a great confidence booster whenever she can sense her sparring partner is doubting/self-loathing. Due to their regular training, continuous study sessions, bonding over food and movie nights. They become really good friends.

One day, Tenko can't shake the rejection from Himiko, especially when Himiko happily hugs and is very clingy with Angie and the others. The stinging morphs into a deep cut. Rantaro finds Tenko pushing herself. He's at first impressed. Then majorly concerned after realising she'd been at it for 4 hours straight.

He confronts her, she breaks down in tears. It breaks his heart to see such a loving, devoted girl be treated like this. He knows Tenko would sacrifice everything to see Himiko smile, so instead of taking it up with Himiko...

"You know...we've been making great progress with our school work. This weekend, why don't we go to a theme park, as a reward?"

This marks the third/forth official date since they'd revisited disneyland a few times prior. He takes her on all the rollercoasters, they bond over the adrenaline rush, it's a good distraction. She's like no one he's ever met before, and only falls harder.

Plus, the slow love-story these two would have to build that loyalty, blind-trust and love that's indestructible is a big reason why I love amacha~! Hope it was ok! If not just lemme know and I'll do more future-date things, like further in their relationship haha!

Sorry got a lil' off-topic...BUT it's VERY vital Tenko gets over her dependence on Himiko before anything can really flourish between these two, BUT I love the idea of Rantaro happily pining after Tenko and making sure she's ok, cuz no one else would.

[obsssions]

━♡ guess the 21 YEAR OLD JUNE baby just arrived to dallyeog! it makes sense, because LEE JANGMI is just as EXTENDED as the month of JUNE. wait, why do they remind me of KIM JIWOO? beyond that, they seemed FAIR & APPRECIATIVE upon first glance. i heard someone say they’re sort of MELODRAMATIC & DEFENSIVE though. i hope they get acquainted here in COMPLEX #2 / APARTMENT #0612 / FLOOR #4 ; SHE seems to have a lot going on with HER job as a ZOOKEEPER'S APPRENTICE.

hi hi hi everyone. i’m hyacinth & this little june baby goes by the name of jangmi. she is really just a few bad personality traits and needless animal facts stacked up on top of each other and wearing a trench coat. (◠﹏◠✿) i love her very much and hope you all do too ( but if you do not i understand~ she is not for everyone. dare i say, she is for NO ONE?! ) tw: death mention below the cut. please, stay safe.

pinboard ♡ stats ♡ plots

BIRTH NAME *   lee   jangmi.

NICKNAMES *     “  mimi.  ”  

BIRTHDAY *    june    12th  ,    1999.

GENDER *    cis female.

WESTERN ZODIAC SIGN *   gemini.

EASTERN ZODIAC SIGN *    tiger.

BLOOD TYPE *   ab.

HOMETOWN *   jeju  island  ,  jeju-do  ,   republic   of   korea.

FAMILY *      lee   minseok   (   father  /  bed  and  breakfast  owner  )  ,  lee   (   formerly park   )   hyejin   (   mother  /  unknown  )

SEXUAL ORIENTATION *    bisexual .

POSITIVE TRAITS *      playful     ,     endearing     ,     engaging     ,     fair     ,     &     appreciative .

NEGATIVE TRAITS *      melodramatic     ,     temperamental     ,     headstrong     ,     finicky     ,       &     defensive .

                  JANGMI grew up rather sheltered, she was the apple of her father’s eye. his only child, his best and brightest star. jangmi never knew her mother -- and her father wouldn’t speak much about her -- which caused a young jangmi to imagine that the woman lived a rather luxurious yet daring life. the girl pictured her mother as everything from a spy to a diplomat to a professor to an astronaut. wherever the girl’s interests lay, that’s where she could find her mother.

                  HOWEVER, as she grew taller and wiser with age, the questions she had about her missing mother only grew and grew. she feared asking her father outright, sure that the reason he never brought her up was due to the crushing way in which he missed her. jangmi figured it was like the sea, ever-present and unchanging. jangmi grew curious; she grew imaginative. the girl always had questions regarding anything and everything. 

                  THAT BEING SAID, she was an inquisitive child, always trying to better herself and outdo her best. she maintained good grades throughout school and tried her hardest to be friendly to everyone -- even when that came at the cost of others whispering about her behind her back, saying she was too quiet, too odd, too set in her own ways. so what if she didn’t have many friends? it had never bothered her before and it wouldn’t bother her now . . . or would it? the loneliness got to be a little much and, whenever that happened, jangmi’s mind would wander back to her mother. where was she? who was she? why isn’t she with me? these three questions -- in varying ways and phrasings -- were what kept her up at night. she needed to know, and she made it her mission to find out someday. pushing things off for future occasions became something of her forte, her bread and butter. jangmi’s problems were tomorrow’s headaches.

                  BUT TOMORROW ALWAYS CAME, didn’t it? sure enough, the sun always rose and she was always forced to face her problems head on ( although she did not want to. no, not at all. ) the girl knew it would be in her best interest to follow through, to seek out new horizons and do her best . . . but why did it require so much work? why did everything worthwhile in life cause her such stress and too many headaches? jangmi found herself working twice as hard to get half the reward as everyone else, but that was until she found her true calling.

                  ALL THAT HAD BEEN SAID about her not being the best at making friends was true. her conversational skills were nothing to write home about, and she liked to daydream her days and nights away. that didn’t mean that she was opposed to connection. no, quite the opposite, actually. jangmi craved closeness and intimacy; she wanted people to like her in the same way that she liked them so much it made her soul ache. however, she knew her limits. she knew that she wasn’t the most exciting or important or even entertaining person. it’s only so long that people will want to hear fun facts about television shows, after all. but jangmi found her calling and realized that it was calling her to get a little . . . wild.

                  SHE APPLIED FOR A JOB AT THE ZOO ON A WHIM, a late night whim -- the type that typically found her eating ramen in her room at 4 am while watching hours-long documentaries about some odd topic that she’d only been interested in for the past twenty minutes. jangmi almost didn’t answer the call to schedule an interview, out of fear that it was one of those scams where the person sounded like her father calling from jail. however, she did pick it up to find that it was the real director of the seoul grand park zoo, asking about her references and such. jangmi couldn’t believe her ears -- had she really gotten the job?

                  YES. yes, she had. all of those nights at school, where it felt like getting a biology degree was getting her nowhere paid off and she was spending her days cleaning up after the cheetahs and helping bathe the rhinos. making connections with people might have been difficult, but it was all too easy for jangmi to fall in love with the animals ( and feel like they were falling in love with her, too. ) she felt a strong bond with the sturdy elephants and how they were constantly being misunderstood. of course, they had little in common besides that, but it was enough to bring some joy into jangmi’s life. of course, with the new job meant a new city. it was goodbye to jeju and hello to seoul. never in a million, billion years could she have seen herself living it up in the big city, but here she was. she finds dallyeog through an ad in the paper and, upon seeing it for the first time, mimi felt an odd peace wash over her. perhaps this was where she was supposed to end up all along.

               OF COURSE certain things still haunted her. she’d never been this far from her father before, but he was likely very busy with the tourism season coming up and the renovations that were being done on the inn. however, she always kept coming back to her mother. what happened to her? it didn’t make sense to jangmi and she was tired of having so much in her life going right ( or seeming to be close to heading down that path ) when that -- that all important thing -- remained a mystery. so, she reaches out to her aunt, figuring that the woman will give it to her straight. aunt hyehoon never minced words and, while it bothered jangmi when she was younger, right now, she needed the sour truth more than she needed a sugar-coated lie.

                  ALAS, what she came to find out was nothing of the sort and, actually, terrifying.

                  ❝  I KILLED HER?   ❞

no wanted connections yet because that would require me to be a human being and not the animal crossing villager that i am............................. BUT please give her some friends / enemies / crushes / exes / social media besties / people she loves / people who hate her .................. you know, the usual plot types. honestly if you come to me and say “i think jangmi and my muse should try to make up their own language and be those irritating neighbors who are running around speaking their made up language” i will say “so true bestie let’s do it.” i am down for anything! replies might be slow because i have a long shift today BUT i see you all and i love you all! i do! not making that up haha!

I PROMISE I WILL BE LESS OF A MESS TOMORROW :OOOOOOOOOO

[2seokfan]

Scarlet & Hazel | Ch. 3

pairings: hoseok x reader x yoongi

genre: fluff, very light angst, smut (future)

word count: 6k

chapters: ch.1, ch.2, ch.3. ch.4

summary: 

Just cause you’re living paycheck to paycheck in a tiny apartment even after graduating college doesn’t mean you’re not happy. So what if your best friend is working her dream job making close to six figures every year?  So what if she’s in a loving, committed relationship with her perfect boyfriend that you’re 99% sure is going to propose to her sometime next year? It doesn’t matter that your idea of a perfect relationship is a $9.99 bottle of wine on Friday nights while you binge watch Netflix specials.

Ok so maybe you’re a teensy bit miserable. Maybe you have no idea what you’re doing with your life. Maybe all you need to do is accidentally cross paths with two hybrids who will drastically change that.

Meet “Scarlet” and “Hazel”, two of the most gorgeous hybrid men you have ever laid eyes on. With their help, you learn that life is an adventure, a roller-coaster with ups and downs, and you were too preoccupied with yourself to climb out of your own predicament. And hey, you’re not much of a romantic, but with these two, you just might change your mind.

a/n: Hello, Jun here! Whew this took a while to write but thank you for your patience!! (poor Y/N still doesn’t know their real names but maybe she’ll find out soon?) Any feedback is appreciated <3 

tag list: @wilhelminalucinda​ @ghostkat23​ @ayoo-bangtan​ @sadgurllayha

2 months later.

August is relentless. You’re sweaty all the time and you have no choice but the crank up the a/c every single day. This heat wave is incredibly brutal because all you want to do is stay at home eating ice cream in your underwear but instead you’re stuck working overtime to pay for what you assume will be a record-high electricity bill. Fuck you global warming. 

It’s currently Tuesday. You’re on lunch break at work, chowing down on a falafel wrap and scrolling through your phone, when a text pops up from Karli.

Karli: Don’t forget!

You: ???

Karli: This friday?

You scratch your head. Wtf?

You: What’s on friday?

Karli: Umm the date? Remember?

No you didn’t. Your dumbass actually forgot about a whole date. You can’t believe yourself. Karli finally set you up with that accountant guy from her job. What’s his name again? Brad? Brandon?

You: oh yeah! my bad haha

Karli: You forgot his name didn’t you?

You: …maybe

Karli: Lol it’s Bryce sweetie

Karli: He’s really sweet! Just give it a shot

You: of course i will

You: i’ll turn up my maximum charm

Karli: Dats my girlllll

Karli: Ugh gtg it’s my boss

Karli: Bye!

You: bye babe

You set your phone down, trying to envision this upcoming Friday. Karli mentioned she gave Bryce your phone number, and he’ll text you sometime this week about your date, so at least you don’t have to make any moves first. She did show you his picture though, being the wingman that she is by stalking all his social media just for you. You’ve gotta admit he is cute, the profile picture showed him sporting a casual smile, with blonde hair and blue eyes. The classic boy-next-door look.

“And he’s most likely not a serial killer!” You remember her declaring a few weeks ago, after scrolling through all his tweets. And when you say all his tweets you mean EVERY Single tweet from when he created his account in high school till now. Your best friend does not fuck around. 

“Thanks I appreciate that. Glad he’ll ‘most likely’ not kill me.” You rolled your eyes and grinned at her.

While you munch away the rest of your lunch, you think about how you just aren’t acting like yourself lately. In any other circumstance, you would’ve found yourself more excited for the date. Hell, in any other circumstance you would’ve at LEAst remembered his name, or thought about what to wear by now, or even stalked his social media along with Karli. There’s just a teensy problem though. See, in the past few months you happen to have met two boys who completely changed your standards in men. And you may have maybe developed the tiniest crush on both of them, at the same time. Like how?? You didn’t think you were physically capable of doing that?

You sigh, staring at the rest of your falafel wrap, and force yourself to accept reality. As much as you adore them, you know that your little crush will be completely unreciprocated. This you found out through your group chat, now named ‘Hazel’s Nuts’ (courtesy of Scarlet). It’s not that you confessed to them or anything, they just happened to let slip to you one day that they’re a mated pair. And hybrids mate for life, so they take that shit very seriously. Although this news stung a little, it didn’t cause you to be envious in any way. At the end of the day, crush or not, you’re just glad you have two more people in your life you can confidently call your close friends.

For the past two months you’ve actively kept up with them. Sometimes you’ll send memes back and forth all night, sometimes you’ll group call each other after work. Every once in a while, when they’re not busy doing whatever it is they’re doing, they facetime you. These are your favorite moments because you get to see them in all their attractive glory. Just because they don’t like you that way doesn’t mean a girl can’t deny herself some eye candy. 

You guys never run out of things to talk about. Each day you check the group chat and it’ll be popping. Your topics range from the movie that just came out, restaurants they discovered, to even discussing new criminal cases (you got Hazel into watching true crime Youtube videos and now he’s entirely hooked). Sometimes you just sit back and watch the two boys bicker back and forth. It’s hysterical how they decide to argue through text since you’re sure both of them are probably in the same room together, but you appreciate them keeping you in the loop. 

At this point they’ve already virtually met Karli. She’s been in the background of one or two of your facetimes. You’re glad she approves of them instantly and you wonder if it has a little something to do with their, especially Scarlet’s, boyish charms. She does keep you grounded though, never failing to mention how it’s suspicious that you don’t know their real names yet.

“I don’t think they mean any harm and they seem genuinely nice,” she had reassured, “But you gotta admit not telling you their names is a little sketch.”

You just shrugged. “They have their reasons.”

Internally you do believe she has a point. Even though you don’t want to force information out of the boys, you’re a naturally curious person. Your mind has already compiled a list of all the unusual facts you’ve discovered about them. 

A couple of things have become clear to you over the span of the last few months. The most important fact is that although they share tons of content with you, you still have no idea what they do for a living. You’re also 90% sure they don’t have an owner since there’s never anyone else around them. Another, more interesting fact is that you suspect they’re actually pretty wealthy. Every time you facetime, they’re in some sort of lavish looking hotel penthouse, with fancy furniture and artwork hanging in the background. They also dress designer, occasionally flashing their Balenciaga hats, or little Gucci necklaces, or other fancy logos your peasant-ass is unfamiliar with. You actually googled one of Hazel’s t-shirts from your most recent facetime, having no idea what the FG logo stood for. You remember your eyes bulging out of your head after discovering his plain white shirt with two black letters cost more than $200. TWO HUNDred dollars?!!! Do you know how much food and gas you could buy with $200? Why in the fuck would he spend that much on a shirt??

If only you knew how much their watches cost.

Friday rolls around faster than you can blink and before you know it, you’re rushing home from work to get ready. Bryce texted you for the first time on Wednesday to see if you wanted sushi (hell yeah you did) and you were fortunate enough to notify your boss so you could be let out early. You’ve been such a work horse the last few months that they had no choice but to let you leave in advance. 

So far Bryce seems nice enough but you can’t get a proper gauge of his character through text. Oh well, guess you’ll find out tonight.

The sushi place you’re meeting at is on the fancier side, and includes a bar. Knowing yourself, if there’s a bar, there’s no car, which means you won’t be driving. The last thing you want is to leave your car parked somewhere sketchy overnight cause you accidentally got too tipsy to drive. You like to think you have some semblance of control but it’s always better to be safe than sorry.

You were let out at 4, which means you have only 2 hours to get ready. As soon as you get home you sprint to your closet at lightning speed. You rummage through your drawers, hoping to find something, ANYthing, that’s appropriate for this occasion. For one quick second, your eyes dart to your forbidden drawer, aka the ho drawer. It contains the remains of your slutty party dresses and tops from college. Being the hoarder that you are, you never like throwing away things, even if you have no need for them anymore. Wait, what the hell am I thinking? You snap your eyes back to the rest of your closet. You’re going for sushi, not to dance at some club. Besides, you have no intention of sleeping with anyone tonight.

After an hour of deciding on a suitable outfit you finally start on your makeup. Your work makeup has dried up, and now feels gross and cakey on your face, so you remove it all and start anew. At least you had the decency to shower this morning so your hair isn’t too gross.

The place is around a 10 minute Uber ride away but you took your sweet ass time getting ready so now you’re in a frenzy. When your phone buzzes, signaling your driver is here, you swipe on some lipstick last minute, grab some chunky heels, and practically fly out the door. 

You stare out the window of your ride, wondering why you’re lowkey wishing you could spend Friday night at home watching tv instead, or even just spending the evening facetiming two hot hybrids. This all feels a little too rushed. But no, you shake your head and attempt to hype yourself up. C’mon Y/N this is the first real date you’ve been on in ages. At least TRy and be a little more motivated. 

The car pulls up and you thank the driver, stepping out into the warm night air. August is still hot, even in the evenings, and you’re glad you didn’t bring a cardigan. Bryce has already texted you, letting you know he was inside, sitting at your reserved spot. You take a deep breath. Ok, time to put on your game face. You strut in, trying your very best to push the faces of two very good-looking friends out of your mind.

You spot Bryce in a corner, head buried in his phone, his wavy blonde hair not easy to miss. You slide in the seat across from him, prompting him to quickly look up and flash you an easygoing smile.

“Hello there!”

“Hi!” You chuckle nervously. “I hope I’m not too late.”

“Not all all!” He slides his phone back in his pocket, smile still on his face. “You’re just in time.”

A waiter comes by and you both take your orders. You make sure to order a drink because you have a feeling you’ll need the liquid courage to strike up more conversation. Maybe some sake will help ease you.

The first couple minutes are kinda awkward, not gonna lie. Bryce tries to get you to talk about work and you do answer him, but honestly work is the last thing you want to discuss right now. You try to shift the conversation to his job, but that only ends up being worse as he quickly launches into the ins and outs of life as an accountant. Maybe your two hybrids friends have spoiled you because you barely remember the last time you had to fill empty space with small talk.

When the food comes you quietly sigh a breath of relief, hoping the sushi in front of you will help you both get settled and give you time to think of more interesting topics to talk about.

“So,” you wrack your brain, “let’s get to know each other more! Like, what’s your favorite ice cream flavor?” That’s got to be a safe enough question.

“Hm, I’m actually more of a yogurt kinda guy, ice cream’s not really my thing.”

You freeze, California roll halfway to your mouth. Ok, ok, cool, cool. So he doesn’t like ice cream, that’s fine. You sweat a little. Hurry Y/N think of something else to ask.

“Yeah, I guess that’s not everybody’s thing.” You grimace. “Then what about, i don’t know, cookies? What’s your favorite kinda cookie?”

“Actually I prefer crackers, you know, like the saltine ones? Cookies can be too sweet sometimes.” He’s devouring his dragon roll, not noticing the panic in your eyes. He’s caught you off guard twice today.

This isn’t going well and you’re genuinely surprised because you know Karli has done her research, certain that you two would get along. Guess life really likes to throw you some curveballs. 

Who the fuck prefers crackers over cookies anyway?? Ok. Code red! Change the fucking subject before the silence becomes unbearable. Your dessert-related ice breakers had never failed you before but there’s always a first for everything, you guess.

You take a generous swig of sake. “Right, crackers are... good.” You’re mumbling at this point. “Ok, um, what about hobbies? Got any?” Please throw me a fucking bone here! Your mind is reeling but externally you try to act calm and composed, dabbing at the corner or you mouth delicately with a napkin.

“Oh yeah!” His face lights up. Oh thank god. “Do you like football? Me and my buddies at the office sorta formed this team, and we play against other departments. It’s really fun! You should come by and watch sometime!”

“Uh, sure!” Football. Huh. The last time you were anywhere near a football was when you met someone from your college team at a bar. Well he wasn’t holding a football per se, but that counts right? You only remember how much of a douche he was, trying to hit on one of the girls from your group after getting entirely too wasted.

“Awesome! I’ll hit you up when the next game is set!” It’s almost impressive how he doesn’t notice all the tension emitting from your body. In fact, you have a feeling he’s actually enjoying himself and your company.

The rest of the dinner goes by in the same manner. With him happily answering all your questions and you slowly discovering just how little you both have in common.

He is a gentleman though, that you can’t deny. When all the food has been cleared away he immediately swoops in to pay the bill, ignoring your insistence at paying for your half at least. He really isn’t a bad person, just the opposite. Besides your difference in interests, he is a sweet guy overall, and you do find him to be physically attractive. There’s just no spark, no silver lining that keeps you wanting more. When you both get out of your seats he offers to drive you back to your place but you politely decline. You say it’s because you don’t want to trouble him but in reality you need space for yourself to think.

As soon as you arrive home you take off your shoes and plop yourself down on the couch, running your hands through your hair. You check your phone, a few notifications from ‘Hazel’s Nuts’ popping up.

Scarlet: Do you think she’s done with her date yet??

Hazel: Hey Y/N how was it?

You had told them about this date beforehand and they were excited to root for you, which did bruise your ego a bit since it reaffirmed your unreturned attraction to them, but also prompted you to go through with it. This last notification was from 45 minutes ago but you couldn’t reply since you were still at dinner.

You: hi I just got back!

You don’t expect them to respond right away but to your surprise:

Scarlet: And???

You: it was meh

Hazel: That bad huh?

You: no nothing like that!

You: he’s really cute and all, it’s just we basically have nothing in common

Scarlet: Aww poor Y/N (sad emojis)

Hazel: Hey happens to the best of us

Hazel: Actually I wouldn’t know cause I’ve only been with fox boy

You: thanks anyway, i appreciate it Hazel

Maybe it’s cause you’re a little tipsy, or maybe you just feel so open and vulnerable around them tonight, but the next text you send is especially honest.

You: ughhh idk guys i’m just so lonely!!! why can’t things just work out for me for once! Like the first real date I go on in years and this happens :(

They don’t respond for a long time. So long in fact you start to get worried that you exposed too much about yourself.

15 minutes pass by but to you it feels like hours. You’ve already removed all your makeup and changed into your pajama shirt. You relocate to your bed, checking your phone again, thinking of a way to play off your last text as a joke when:

Hazel: If you’re so lonely maybe you could adopt?

You grin to yourself, glad that they’re not being judgmental. Their concern for you resets your mood.

You: ha ha you know my apartment doesn’t allow pets

You: but honestly if i could i would, cause i’d definitely get a little kitty

Hazel: I’m flattered

You: thanks but i meant a real cat

Hazel: Either way i’m flattered

Scarlet: HEY what about foxes??

You: pretty sure owning a pet fox is illegal here Scar

Scarlet: (angry emojis)

Hazel: You heard what the lady said

You: anyways i’m going to bed

You: thanks for making me feel better guys <3

Hazel: Anytime

Scarlet: But hypothetically if foxes weren’t illegal you’d get a pet fox right??

You: of course i would sweetie

Scarlet: (happy emojis)

Scarlet: Yay!!! Goodnight Y/N!

Hazel: Night Y/N

You: night boys

You wake up next morning on your own time, checking your phone to see that you slept in till 11am. Wow, you haven’t slept that well in a while. Maybe it’s the stress from the previous weeks of non stop working, or the pressure to maintain your composure last night, but either way you knocked out like a rock. You sit up, lean back, and stretch your arms as far as they can go.

Today you’re meeting Karli at her place up north. She couldn’t ask you about last night since she was occupied, her seven year anniversary with her boyfriend Sunny coinciding with your date. But she assured you a couple days ago over facetime that today was going to be a girl’s day, no boyfriend included.

“Hey!” Sunny had popped out of nowhere in the video when he heard the news, a look of mock shock on his face. “I live here too! So what, you're just gonna kick me out of the house and leave me on the streets to starve?”

“My god stop being dramatic!” Karli had shoved him playfully off the screen. “I need girl time with Y/N and it’s not girl time if you’re in the house.”

“I can be one of the girls! Right Y/N?” He sounded betrayed.

“I know you can but I’m not the one who makes the rules.” You pointed out.

He sighed. “You got me there.”

Since you’re just spending time at Karli’s and getting takeout, you felt zero need to dress up. You washed your face, threw on an oversized t-shirt some old hookup left at your place (hey it was cute) and some tights, and tied your hair out of your face. This entire process took less than 30 minutes and next thing you know you’re ready to head out.

You sent Karli a quick text, letting her know you’re on the way. You grab a bottle of prosecco, your purse, and keys, saying a quick goodbye to your roommate Ayah on your way out. She gives you a small wave, reminding you that she, yet again, has to leave today for a whole week. You backtrack to give her a quick goodbye hug, telling her to drive safe, before you take off.

Karli’s place isn’t as far as the beach coffeehouse you frequent, but it’s still located in the wealthier side of town. The drive lasts a good 20 minutes but it feels a lot faster since you spend the whole time singing along to your favorite songs.

You pull up to Karli’s apartment complex, driving yourself to the guest parking space. Her apartment building is pretty tall, with a distant, but gorgeous view of the beach. 

Karli squeals when she opens the door, immediately giving you a big hug. When you break apart you hold up the bottle of prosecco in your hand, waving it in front of her face.

“I know you have the ingredients here so let’s make some spritz!”

“Yay!”

Aperol spritz is your favorite at-home drink to make with Karli. She had gone on a short trip to Italy in the summer between her two years at grad school and tried the drink there, completely falling in love. She googled the recipe, made it for you one day, you had said “Oh FUck that’s good!”, and the rest is history.

She grabs the bottle and quickly relocates it to her kitchen. Her energy levels are sky high today and you wonder what’s got her so elated. She’s skipping everywhere she goes, there’s a permanent smile etched on her face, and she’s humming non stop as she pulls you away from the front entrance.

Sunny emerges from the hallway, two hands in the air in surrender.

“I’m heading out, I swear!”

Sunny is a big teddy bear of a man, with tattoos splayed across his arms and a well-kept beard. There’s a term you learned online called ‘lumbersexual’ and that’s exactly the word to describe Sunny. He almost reminds you of Jason Momoa, the actor who played Aquaman. Those who just meet him think he looks intimidating at first but once you get past his height and size, you see just how much of a softie he is. He’s also extremely intelligent, working somewhere in the computer industry developing software.

Karli bounds over to him and gives him a big snuggly hug and tiptoes all the way up to give a quick kiss to his lips.

“Have fun babe! Love you!”

“Love you too! Also bye Y/N!”

“Bye Sunny have fun!” You smile as he treads out the door.

You both head to the kitchen and start making your drinks.

“Aren’t you extra chipper today!” You mention as you pour a splash of club soda into your glass.

“Am I?” She doesn’t look at you, wearing a mysterious grin, stirring her mixture with a straw.

After you both finish making your drinks, you head to her living room and settle onto her plush sofa.

Karli yawns, almost too dramatically, covering her left hand over her mouth. You quirk your eyebrow at her, wondering why she’s acting so weird until you spot it. There’s something large, something shiny, on her left ring finger.

“Oh my god….” Your entire mouth hangs open. “Oh my GOD!!! Is THAT…?”

“Yep!”

“Did HE -?”

“Yep!!”

“AND YOU - ?

“YEP I DID!!”

“YOU’RE ENGAGED?!?!?!”

“I KNOW!!!!”

What happens after is a shriek rivaling that of a pterodactyl taking flight after spotting prey, except the sound is just the two of you screaming and jumping up and down in Karli’s living room.

You bring her into a tight hug, so emotional that you’re about to tear up. And you’re not one to cry that easily.

“I’m so happy for you!” You pull apart and wipe a stray tear from your cheek.

“Thank you! I’m so happy too!” Her smile is also a little watery. “Like I knew he was gonna do it soon since we’ve been together so long but I’m still shocked you know?”

“I know!” 

“And I’m sorry. Today was supposed to be me asking about your date last night.” She dabs at her eyes. “Bryce really likes you too. He even texted me thanking me for introducing you!!”

“Oh shit...” You take this chance to drink your Aperol spritz. “I’m gonna be completely honest with you. It’s true he’s cute but there was no spark.” You give her an apologetic grin, knowing she really wanted this to work out for you. “Like don’t get me wrong he’s super nice and stuff but I just couldn’t find anything we have in common. I can’t believe he’s still into me?!” 

“Aw I’m sorry babe.” She pouts. “I really did think you would be a good match.”

“It’s ok. Anyways,” you wave her off, bringing up the more important subject at hand. “I’d much rather talk about your engagement! Like, hello?? You’re getting married, girl!!

Another squeal. You really hope her neighbors don’t complain.

“I know!! I literally don’t know what to think!” She smiles wistfully, like she’s on cloud nine, then brings her attention back to you. “Also you’re the maid of honor and you can’t back out of that.”

“I would never!” You gasp dramatically, one hand clutching your chest.

“But don’t worry!” She sets her drink down. “The wedding’s not happening till next year at least. We don’t have to start planning till way later.”

The rest of the day you spend chatting to Karli, prompting her to spill every single detail about the proposal. Even though you have no need to help her plan a wedding just yet, you can’t hold back from offering some ideas that spring to mind.

“I got it!!” You shout.

“You got what?”

“Hear me out,” you may or may not be a little tipsy at this point. “Goth wedding!” You say with jazz hands. Then you reach down to take another sip of your drink.

“Hmm…” She pretends to think about the idea, then giggles. “And that’s enough prosecco for you.” Plucking the glass out of your hand, she transfers it to her kitchen sink.

A couple more hours roll by. You both decide to watch a cheesy Netflix horror movie to sober up, paired with the Mexican takeout you ordered. By the time the credits roll, the sun has long since set, along with your alcohol buzz. You check the time on your phone, deciding it’s best to head home since poor Sunny has been respectfully out and about all day, giving you your girl time.

You give Karli one last big hug, murmuring into her hair how happy you are for her situation. She walks you to the apartment elevator, where you proceed to blow her a swift kiss right before the doors close in your face.

Reality sets in the moment you’re alone. Your head swims with thoughts as you drive back. Most of them are happy about your best friend’s engagement but you can’t discount the little ugly bubble of jealousy that wells down deep in your gut, reminding you of your own current situation. It’s not until you reach home that you realize you didn’t even play music in the car.

Ayah has long since gone on her business trip by the time you arrive at your apartment. The whole place looks dark and unwelcome, only highlighting the emptiness you feel inside. You trudge to your room and slump onto your bed. You try to scroll through social media as a way to distract yourself but you’re met, instead, by all the pictures and posts of happy people, showing off their achievements or bragging about their seemingly perfect lives.

You immediately lock your phone and throw it onto the blanket, the stress and anxiety from the last few months building to a boiling point in your mind. Your biggest concern is you still haven’t figured out your lease situation, and you only have two more months to move out or find someone new. Ayah has tried her best to help you but she’s bombarded by business trips so no luck so far. You let out a small groan and bury your head in the pillow, deciding to sleep it off and worry about your problems tomorrow, even though it’s not even that late.

Right as you’re about to drift off into dreamland, your phone rings. You fumble around the covers until it’s in your hands and check that you have a facetime call from your two favorite boys.

Immediately your body jerks awake and you sit up, swiping the answer button.

“Hey guys!”

“Hi Y/N!!” Scarlet’s heart-shaped smile is taking up most of the screen but you can see a sliver of white and grey hair behind him.

Hazel elbows him out of the way. “Sorry were you sleeping?” He tilts his head, ears twitching. “Wait, it’s only 10 pm where you’re at. You never sleep this early.”

“No I wasn’t... I mean, yeah I was trying to sleep but…”

You sigh. It’s their faces. Just seeing them through a screen, their wide, innocent eyes blinking up at you, makes you want to spill everything.

You nibble on your bottom lip for a moment. “I was just kinda having an existential crisis so I decided to sleep it off. No biggie.”

Scarlet’s eyebrows furrow in concern. After only two months, he can already tell when something is off with your tone of voice.

“Y/N what’s wrong?” He looks up for a bit, pausing to think. “Was it the date last night?”

“The date?” Oh yeah the date. Yet another thing that didn’t go well. You totally forgot about that can of worms. “Not really… or actually kinda?”

You try to reorganize your jumbled mess of a brain and put your thoughts into words.

“So you know how I said I was going to Karli’s today?”

“Mhm,” they nod at you to continue.

“Well turns out she got engaged last night.”

“That’s awesome! I’m so happy for her!” Scarlet bounces a little, then quickly returns to a more serious tone. “But that doesn’t really answer my question.”

“Yeah I’m happy for her too.” And you genuinely are.

You pause for another moment, teetering on the edge of playing your emotions off like it’s no big deal or exposing all of your concerns yet again. Your need for an outlet to vent to wins in the end. For the first time you find yourself unable to confide in Karli because you want her to be happy and focus on the engagement rather than to be preoccupied with you. Before you know it, the words flow from your mouth like running water.

“It’s just that her announcement really brought me back to earth, and I started thinking a little too much about my own life.” You purse your lips. “I don’t know… I feel pretty selfish right now because she’s doing so well and I just can’t help comparing my life to hers. I’m so proud of her but it’s like everything in her life is coming together and I just want that for me also.” You throw your hands up in frustration, almost knocking the phone off from where it leans on your pillow. “I mean we’re the same age for god's sake! Why can’t I get my shit together??”

“Well you should be proud of yourself though,” Hazel cuts in. “Cause we are.” He gestures to Scarlet and himself.

“Yeah!” Scarlet chimes. “I mean you’ve got a full time job and a place to stay. I know you don’t feel like it’s the most ideal situation right now but please don’t discredit yourself.”

“Thanks guys.” You calm down a bit, but then you remember the whole issue with your apartment. Scratching the back of your neck, a habit you’ve picked up whenever you’re nervous, you say in a much smaller voice, “although my ‘place to stay’ might not last much longer.”

“What do you mean?” Both boys’ eyebrows are raised in confusion.

You realize you never mentioned your living situation to them, the topic always pushed to the back of your mind whenever they initiated conversation.

“Yeah.” A dry chuckle leaves your lips. “My lease ends soon and Ayah wants to move to a place of her own. And I have two months to figure out where to live or find another roommate.” You let out a frustrated huff. “She’s been so helpful but still no luck I guess.” You shrug in defeat.

You feel like a balloon that’s lost all its air, brain exhausted from running through all the problems in your life.

“Actually that’s pretty convenient for- ” Scarlet starts, but is elbowed again in the ribs by Hazel. “Ow!”

“Not yet!” The cat hisses quietly to him.

“Huh?” Now you’re confused. What in the world are they talking about?

Hazel turns back to you. “I’m really sorry about everything Y/N. If there’s anything we can do to help please let us know.” 

“Thanks buddy.” You offer him a small smile, choosing to ignore what just happened since they clearly don’t want to reveal anything just yet. 

Hazel then shifts to a more nervous stance, ears slightly flattening and both hands grabbing his floofy grey tail for comfort. It’s the cutest goddamn thing you’ve ever seen in your life.

“So Y/N, um, there’s a reason we called you tonight.”

You’re glad for a change in subject, a much needed distraction away from your downward spiraling thoughts.

“Oh right! Yeah. What’s up guys?”

Scarlet steps in front of him again, blocking most of the screen.

“We have a surprise for you!” He’s so close to the camera that you can only see half of his unblemished face but from the way his eyes crinkle, you can tell he’s giddy with anticipation.

“A surprise- ?”

“Yeah!!”

Hazel nudges himself into view again. “Quit hogging the whole screen fox! I swear to god next time we’re using the tv. I can’t see anything! Anyways,” he turns to you and smooths his shirt, expression back to stoic, “are you free next weekend?”

“I should be. Why?” You’re still a little lost on what the surprise is.

“Cause we’re coming back to town!” Scarlet blurts out.

“You are?!” Suddenly all your negativity melts away, replaced by excitement. Hard to believe just five simple words can shift your mood a complete 180°.

“But wait, there’s more!” You snort at how much Scarlet sounded like an infomercial just now.

“We’d like to invite you to dinner next Saturday night. If that’s ok with you?” Hazel isn’t as physically expressive as Scarlet but the hopeful shine in his eyes gives himself away.

You melt at his expression, heart rate speeding up. “Of course that’s ok! I’d love to!”

“Great!” He flashes one of his rare gummy smiles. “Saturday night. 7 pm. We’ll text you the details.”

“Yep!” Scarlet pipes in. “There’s something important we gotta ask- !” He lets out a small gasp, tail bristling, and clamps a hand over his mouth as if he just said something he shouldn’t have.

“What’s important?” You’ve gotta admit, your curiosity is at its peak right now, and it doesn’t help that they’re acting a little weird today.

Hazel rubs his temples in exasperation, groaning at Scarlet. “What part of ‘not yet’ did you not understand?” He then addresses you. “Sorry Y/N I promise we’ll tell you when we see you in person.” 

“Ok.” Cool. That’s fine. You’re a little nervous about what they have to say and it’ll be torture to wait but you’re a big girl and you can handle not knowing for a week. “I can’t wait to see you guys!!” you added.

“Me too!” Scarlet’s personality is so bubbly and contagious that you can’t help but smile back at him.

“Same.” Hazel lets out a small yawn. “Well we’re in a different time zone than you and it’s really late here so I gotta hit the hay.”

“Mk, go get your beauty sleep.” You give them a little wave. “And thanks for everything. I mean it.”

“No problem Y/N.” Scarlet also gives off a yawn, stretching his tired limbs. “Goodnight.”

“Night.”

After ending the facetime call, you lie on your back, staring at the ceiling. Your mind is active once again, but this time it’s not clouded with self-deprecating thoughts. Instead, you spend the remainder of the evening theorizing about the ‘important’ things the boys have to tell you. Maybe you’ll finally find out their real names. Or maybe they’ll reveal something else about themselves, like why they’re constantly travelling, or what they actually do for a living. Either way you can’t wait for next Saturday to come around.

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[latibulx]

booyoung and byul ( not a lot of interactions between the two but i do be curious :O )

ULTIMATE SHIP MEME! ㅡ open ㅡ @pathwae

General:

Rate the Ship -   Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - I think they might have a few break-ups here and there; probably because of the distance between them that makes it difficult to maintain a romantic relationship. And also, perhaps because they both end up quite busy with their own work/passion. However, if they manage to find their rhythm and work on their own selves, I can see them growing old together.

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Okay, my headcanon is that they met through friends they have in common and they immediately hit it off and became friends rather quickly. Falling in love came naturally as they got to spend more time together and got to know each other better, most likely realizing how well they were fitting each other. I imagine it happened over the course of several months because neither Byul or Booyoung wanted to rush into a relationship and take the risk to ruin their friendship.

How was their first kiss? - I imagine that Booyoung would have invited Byul to see her perform because he had promised her that he'd come see her at least once. And, after the performance, instead of going back to their own place, they decided to have a late dinner together and take a walk by the Cheonggyechon river. And, Byul probably made her laugh while they were sitting, their feet in the water, and they were flirtingㅡ a little more than usual, both high on how perfect that night feels. And then it just came naturally, his hand on her cheek and her face leaning towards his; their lips meeting in a sweet, and a timid first kiss.

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Byul, because he knows that Booyoung is really romantic and she would definitely want a sweet proposal.

Who is the best man/men? - Byul's best friend or someone from his family he is close to.

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Booyoung's best friends and music partners!

Who did the most planning? - I can see them planning together but Byul being a bit lost at some point with everything there is to plan and take care of, haha.

Who stressed the most? - Byul, maybe? Booyoung would be mostly excited and all over the place because!! they're getting married!!

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 - I don't see them having a very fancy wedding and instead something more intimate, with only they people they care about. But because Booyoung's grandparents are attached to tradition, they still would have to wear hanboks and get married properly.| 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - Acquaintances and friends they only hear about once a year, probably.

Sex:

Who is on top? - Depends of the mood! Mostly Byul, I'd say, but sometimes Booyoung ends up on top.

Who is the one to instigate things? - Once again, it depends of the mood. Once they've gone past their hesitations and embarrassment, they'll probably feel comfortable enough to show the other when they are in the mood.

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 - I think that when they are not countries apart, they want to make the most out of the time together and it does involve regular sex. But then it happens that even when they're in the same city, they're both busy and they have to work on finding a balance on their personal lives and their work. | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 - I see them as a rather vanilla couple who enjoy trying out new positions and maybe use some toys to spice things up but they mostly enjoy the connection making love brings between them. | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - It depends if they're tired or not. Or if they take their time or not. Perhaps between 30 min and one hour?

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - Yes! I feel like it's important to them that they both give as much as they've received.

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time - while they might spice things up every so often, I feel like they are rarely rough in bed, because it doesn't really fit their personalities. | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 - every opportunity is a good opportunity to cuddle! especially when they haven't seen each other in a while. | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - they initially wanted to stop at two children, but then Booyoung unexpectedly got pregnant with twins, so they've got four children!

How many children will they adopt? - once their children will be all grown up, I definitely can see Booyoung suggesting that they consider adopting. So, maybe they'll have two more children, or maybe three.

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - Byul! He's a very helpful father and doesn't hesitate to be on diapers duty.

Who is the stricter parent? - None of them are really strict.

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Byul, because Booyoung is the one to encourage them to go on adventures, pft.

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - Booyoung, because Byul is the one dressing the kids for school. (If that was Booyoung, she'd undoubtedly make their kids wear hanboks!)

Who is the more loved parent? - no differences in this house, they all love each other very much

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? - both, they both want to be here for their children in every moment of their lives, including stressful PTA meetings.

Who cried the most at graduation? - Byul, because he's remembered how far he has come since he has himself graduated and he feels incredibly happy to be able to see his own children graduate.

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - I can see Byul doing that too! But, let's be honest, Booyoung would do anything for their children too.

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - Booyoung. She's good with her hands, and her grandmother has taught her how to cook since a young age.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - None of them are very picky, they even have similar taste so it's easy to choose what dishes they'll eat.

Who does the grocery shopping? - Together as often as they can, and if one is busy, the other will go alone.

How often do they bake desserts? - Rarely, they prefer to buy them directly at the bakery. At least they're certain to not be disappointed!

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - Meat lovers.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Both! Booyoung is a romantic and definitely remember their anniversaries and would cook something very nice for dinner, but I also can see Byul making an effort and actually cooking dinner for Booyoung to surprise her.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Maybe Booyoung, especially on days where they are too tired to cook but don't want to order take-out food. And she'd always say that it always feels like they're going out on a date when they eat out.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidentaly while cooking? - Byul? I'm not sure, haha. None of them.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - Both, we like sharing chores in this house!

Who is really against chores? - Both, too. They both have their days where they absolutely don't want to clean so the other finds a way to motivate them. Maybe with little smooches and sweet words.

Who cleans up after the pets? - Byul, probably. Booyoung isn't against it but she always manages to convince him to do it instead.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - None of them, they like their house clean!

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - They don't really stress out unless Booyoung's grandparents are visiting and in that case both are stressed!

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - I can see Byul in that situation, haha.

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Booyoung, especially because she's always having a little concert while she's showering, haha. And if they're bathing together, it lasts even longer!

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - Both of them because it's relaxing to be walking outside together with the dog.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Booyoung loves tradition so... Every time there's a holiday coming around, you can be sure that the house will be decorated!

What are their goals for the relationship? - Communication and respect and love. I think they want a healthy relationship in which they aren't afraid to tell each other how they feel, even when they aren't feeling good.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Before they become parents, both. Then, none of them. They forget what it means to oversleep, haha.

Who plays the most pranks? - Both! Honestly, they can be such kids at times, I can see them running around the apartment having a water fight or a tickle fightㅡ or even a random pillow fight when they're supposed to be watching something on TV.

[fleckcmscott]

The Knot

Summary: Arthur and Y/N finally have the wedding they discussed on their sprint to City Hall.

Warnings: Swearing

Words: 4,238

A/N: This was requested by @sweet-nothings04​. It is the fluffiest thing I have ever written. Special thanks to @ithinkimawriter​ for the support and beta-reading!

If you have any thoughts or questions, please comment, feel free to message me, or send me an ask. Requests for Arthur and WWH are open!

The nightly routine Y/N had developed over the years was a simple one. Her barely-there foundation, neutral eye shadow, eyeliner, and light mascara would be washed away with soap and water. After changing into a nightgown, she'd brush her teeth and hair. Moisturizing cream would be dabbed on her forehead, cheeks, and chin. (A couple of thin lines had formed at the corners of her mouth, and she hoped to prevent more.) She'd crawl into bed beside Arthur, they'd talk and cuddle, then she'd kiss him good night and wait for sleep to take her. It was a relaxing end to the day that didn't require a lot of effort.

But this evening was not routine. What Patricia seemed to have planned for it put Y/N's habits to shame. Peeking into the mint green satchel she'd brought caused a grimace. It was possible the clay and honey cosmetic masks wouldn't be too bad. The toe separators and nail polish and pumice stones didn't interest her. And the floral, spray-in hair perfume was pungent. God. All this fuss prompted Y/N to pour the both of them the rest of the wine.

"This is too much for me." Y/N frowned in the bathroom mirror and examined the mud on her face. "How long do I need to keep this on?" she asked, the alcohol making her grumble.

"Ten minutes." Patricia set a timer and placed it on the sink. "And don't whine. This stuff is why no one knows I'm over fifty."

"And here I assumed it was your vibrant personality." After taking a sip from her glass, Y/N turned to the tub. There were about five inches of hot water in it, topped with pink foam that smelled like artificial roses. It reminded her of the dusty, scented candles her grandmother had kept in the bathroom, but never lit. Patricia sat on the edge, dipped her feet in and waved for Y/N to join her.

Patricia started scrubbing the ball of her foot. "Are you excited?"

Y/N made a thoughtful noise. When she and Arthur had gotten married at city hall a year ago, she hadn't needed a wedding - she'd needed to be married to him. He'd wished for one, though, and she'd promised him that. "The wedding I had before was stressful. I could go without it." A gentle smile came across her cheeks. "But I am for him." She sighed contently as she submerged her feet. "When we were filling out the invitations a month ago, he was so happy. He pasted one in his journal - he showed me the page - and put exclamation points all around it."

That wasn't all he'd done. Arthur had convinced her to practice a slow dance to one of his mood music records. It hadn't taken much effort for him to talk her into it. ("I've imagined this a lot," he'd told her.) She figured she'd gotten pretty good, having learned to let him lead her instead of trying to anticipate his steps. His generous encouragements and the pleasure in his eyes had helped.

Snorting, Patricia grabbed a nearby smoother and began working on her heel. "How did a hard-ass like you end up with a sweet man like him?"

"He thinks I'm sweet." Y/N shook her head, splashing around with her toes. "Don't tell him he's been had."

At the buzzing of the timer, Y/N sprung up and went to the sink. Getting the mask off was as annoying as she'd suspected. The packaging said to use a cloth, lukewarm water, and circular motions. But the clay was stubborn and didn't want to leave her face. Patricia apparently found it hilarious, laughing all the harder when Y/N looked at her with indignation. Three washrags and an empty glass of wine later, her skin was clear. Irritated, but clear.

Patricia gestured over her shoulder as she dried off. "There's a present for you in my bag. You said no gifts, but it's nothing. And I didn't want to give it to you in front of Robert and Matt tomorrow."

Intrigued, Y/N retrieved the bag from the floor and sat next to her on the tub's edge. Matt, Y/N's former boss, she could understand. But what would Patricia give her that she didn't want her own husband to see? It only took a little digging to find the box, slightly bigger than her hand, with a red ribbon around it. "You shouldn't have." She opened it and pulled out what was inside. Her best friend had given her a black, satin thong with side ties. She stared at it a moment, then burst out laughing. "It's so tiny," she exclaimed, the triangle front barely large enough to cover her palm. "I don't have the ass for this!"

Winking, Patricia nudged her upper arm. "It won't stay on long enough for Arthur to notice."

~~~~~

Meanwhile, Arthur was at a pub with a friend for the first time in his life. He'd been to comedy clubs plenty of times, and Y/N had introduced him to numerous restaurants. But his general lack of interest in drinking and absence of companionship had never made bars a desirable destination. It had been Gary's idea, though. And with his company, Arthur was part of the crowd instead of apart from it.

They were seated at a small booth near the kitchen, away from everyone. Their conversation was sparse. Despite his overall increase in comfort, Arthur still had a hard time with social situations. Granted, Y/N had told him he was steadily getting better at them. And now, with the effect of the Fuzzy Navel in his hand, he was doing all right. There had been no forced laughter (which only happened a few times a month), no bouncing of his legs, and no nail biting. He was proud of himself for that, especially given the hint of nervousness he felt.

Tomorrow was their big day. The wedding was going to be at their apartment. There would only be four guests: he'd made it clear Penny wasn't welcome, and the elderly woman Y/N had invited, Ms. McPhee, had declined with an apology and cookies, saying she was too ill to go anywhere. Dinner would be potluck style. Finally, he'd fucking have what he'd dreamed about for years. Although it was implied every time he touched Y/N, he'd get to vow, publicly, to stay with her forever. To take care of her, no matter their circumstances. To love her ceaselessly. And, he reflected, she'd promise to belong to him, too. He grinned around his cigarette as he smoked, looking into his drink, joy rushing through him at the thought.

Gary took a swig of his porter. "Are you looking forward to tomorrow?"

"Yes." Arthur answered without hesitation. "But I don't know why Y/N wanted me to spend the night out. We're already married."

"You can't sleep with the bride before the wedding. It's tradition."

Tradition. His chest tightened at that. Tradition hadn't meant anything most of this life, anything besides futile yearning. He couldn't remember if he'd been read to as a kid. Lost teeth probably ended up in the garbage. Holidays had always been too expensive to take part in, and with Penny's apathy and all the hours he'd worked, he hadn't had the energy to try. He was glad to be making up the deficit with Y/N. Still. This was an odd custom, and not really applicable to them. "But I've been sleeping with her for two years." Almost as soon as he spoke, he realized his double entendre. He brought a hand to his forehead. "Shit. Sorry, Gary."

A sly smile crossed Gary's face, but he didn't seem upset. Which made sense - filthy jokes and dirty tales often flew around the locker room at HaHa's. The shorter man reached into the breast pocket of his striped shirt, then held out a small package. "Here. I got this for you."

Curious, Arthur examined the cellophane enclosed carton. The teal box of NoDoz said it would keep him awake, was fast acting, and safe as coffee. And there was a sentence, written in a cursive font on the bottom edge: "Number 1 with Newlyweds!" Oh. Oh. He knew what they were for. Once in a while he'd come across The Honeymoon Game when flipping through channels. The tablets were often mentioned, along with comments about "being busy all night long." The burning in his cheeks only amplified his giggles as he tucked them in his pocket. "Thanks. For letting me stay over, too."

"You're welcome. It's just the sofa." Gary gave a shrug. "What time did you want to get back home?"

Arthur recalled the list of errands Y/N had helped him make. He had to stop at the flower stand near their place and get a white carnation for himself and a bunch for her. Garlic bread needed to be ordered at Marchetti's, to go with the lasagna Y/N was attempting. He wanted to give himself a good half hour to change, fix his hair, and practice saying what he'd written.

Gary agreed getting back to the apartment in the early afternoon would be fine. Arthur wasn't expecting his follow-up question. "How'd you know she was the one for you?"

Trying to hide the embarrassment behind his answer, he sipped his cocktail. "Gary, no other woman ever wanted to be with me."

"I'm sure that's not true," Gary replied. Arthur didn't move to correct him. Maybe he'd successfully hidden his prior failures from his former co-workers by simply not joining in when they all talked about women.

It took time to come up with a response. When he gave it, the words were quiet, his tone almost reverent. "She never acted like there was something wrong with me." The corner of his mouth quirked up as he tapped the ash off his cigarette. "No one else ever did that. Not even my mother." Realizing he may have insulted Gary, he backtracked quickly. "You- You were always nice."

Gary visibly brightened and waved at a waiter to order them both another round. Arthur sat back against the torn cushion of the booth, already slightly dizzy from the first one. It was going to a long, hopefully good, night.

~~~~~

The preparation for the 4:00 PM ceremony did not go as smoothly as planned. The dish Patricia brought, which she had wanted to keep a surprise, was macaroni and cheese. Y/N ran out and bought three salads from the deli so there'd be an option besides pasta. She'd made a small tear in the hem of her light blue wedding dress, one she'd picked up at a consignment shop, when she'd gotten caught on a doorway. And Arthur insisted on not seeing her in her dress beforehand, so she spent most of the time cooped up in the bathroom. She could hear Arthur's hushed tones as he paced the living room and spoke to Gary ("I'm gonna fuck up. What if I start laughing?"), and Gary trying to reassure him ("Arthur, just read it.").

But those snags were nothing compared to the issues at her first wedding. The flowers had never arrived. The cake topper had fallen, splitting the groom's head in half and breaking off the bride's arm. And, about halfway through it, she'd realized she was making a mistake. Presently, standing in front of the mirror while she fiddled with her high, split neckline and waited for Patricia to get her, she knew she hadn't erred. Doubt never entered her mind when it came to Arthur - only love, happiness, and gratitude.

When the door opened, Y/N ran her palm along the embroidered lace of the dress's bodice, smoothed the chiffon of the full-length, A-Line skirt, pulled at the wrists of the long, translucent sleeves, and took a deep breath. Her heart quickened when the faint notes of Arthur's favorite, sentimental Jackie Gleason Orchestra LP reached her ears. She stepped out. All the furniture had been pushed up against the walls, leaving space in the middle of the room. Their four friends stood there expectantly. Then she looked at Arthur, and the excitement she'd told Patricia she felt for him suddenly became her own.

He'd slicked back his hair, the way he always did when he was trying to be formal, curls loose around his ears. The white button-up he was wearing was a tad large around the shoulders. But the likely second-hand black vest and trousers he wore fit perfectly. The carnation in the waistcoat's breast pocket was a nice addition. He was wearing his red and yellow tie, still the only one he owned, in spite of it being part of his Carnival outfit.  As she approached him steadily, she studied his face. The affection in his soft expression caused her breath to hitch, as did the drawing together of his dark brow as he admired her. She giggled, hoping he liked the nontraditional dress.

There was no need for the question, however. As soon as their hands met, he clutched hers and smiled. The autumn sun, which was already halfway down the sky, brought out the deep chestnut undertones of his brown waves. And the clear green of his irises glistened beautifully in the bright light. If it would have been acceptable, she would have kissed him on the spot. Instead, she settled for mouthing, "You're gorgeous." The blush that resulted, the way he lowered his head as he grinned happily, and his silent, "You, too," made her stomach flutter.

Listening to what the yellow-pages officiant said was nigh impossible. And from the expression on Arthur's face, he couldn't concentrate, either. But they managed to get through the basic vows, those same, time-honored words spoken at nearly every wedding she'd attended. (Except for "worshiping" and "obeying" - she'd insisted those parts be removed, explaining they were equals.) They'd each come up with their own short pieces, too, and at his insistence, she went first. "I didn't come to Gotham to find love. I just wanted to leave everything behind. Then I met you. You made getting remarried the easier decision I've ever made."

What Arthur said in return, reading softly but clearly from a worn piece of paper, had her beat. "People think I'm weird. But you don't." His Adam's apple bobbed and a slight tremor entered his voice. "You're my one and only person that can understand me." His rasp turned into a hiccup at the end, and he sniffled and scoffed while he tucked his notes away. The clench of her throat was immediate, and she threw her arms around him, not waiting for the words "you may kiss the bride" before joining their lips.

~~~~~~

​​​A wedding day was supposed to be special. Out of the ordinary. Exceptional. Anything but regular. But Arthur couldn't remember the last time he had felt normal for as many hours in a row as he did today. The flash of a pocket-camera when he'd cupped Y/N's face and kissed her after she'd lunged at him. Their short dance, with the shallow dip they'd practiced and her stepping on his foot only once or twice. The gentle "I love you" he'd murmured against her lips. The acceptance of her friends when they congratulated them both. All of these extraordinary moments coalesced into a warm, tender, soothing ache that, in spite of his doubts, confirmed he was a real person, worthy and capable of love.

The glass door opened behind him, and, expecting Y/N to drag him back inside, he flicked his cigarette away. But upon turning he saw Patricia, drink in her hand. They'd spoken briefly a few times since initially meeting a couple years ago. Arthur didn't yet have a clear impression of her. Y/N and she were close, he knew, and they often met for lunch. And Patricia had helped her try to stop the Wayne Foundation case from going forward. Observing the older woman, he noted the gray scattered throughout her hair, the lines on her face that were less prominent than his own, the minimal rouge on her cheeks. She reminded him of Penny before her health had declined. Before everything had changed.

"Could I have a cigarette?" she asked, indicating the pack he was holding.

He blinked at her. "Sure."

She stepped to him as he retrieved one for her. After she plucked it from him and placed it between her lips, she took his lighter. "Y/N doesn't know. Keep it that way. You may not have picked up on it yet, but she can be bossy."

Chuckling, he cocked his head. Y/N had warned him about her bossiness early on, but it wasn't as bad as she'd claimed. Sure, she was assertive about certain things. But smoking was the only thing she was overly pushy about. The reason for her nagging prevented it from being more than a minor annoyance, though: she wanted them to spend a hundred years together, she'd said, instead of him dying prematurely of lung cancer. Blunt to a fault, as usual, with an inkling of sweetness underneath.

"Y/N was crazy about you from the start," Patricia said, pulling him out of his musings.

A glow blossomed in his chest and he dropped his gaze bashfully. "She talked about me?"

She smirked up at him, as if she was about to reveal a secret. "She gave me a note with hearts and exclamation points on it after you slept together."

Eyes widening, he turned back towards the street and focused on a manhole cover. It shouldn't have surprised him - he'd spoken with Gary about Y/N - but it did. And meant the world to him. But he was beginning to wonder what else she'd disclosed. Christ, was Patricia aware he'd been inexperienced? Had Y/N said he'd done a good job? Had she...Could she have talked about his body, the way the men at HaHa's described the women they were seeing? Those notions were laughable, he tried to tell himself, and attempted to push through them amid his growing discomfort.

Patricia gave his forearm a maternal pat, allaying his unease. "It was because you were gentle with her." He watched her angle her body towards the window and peer inside, and he followed her gaze. Y/N was pointing at a spot in the living room for the folding table they'd rented, along with six chairs. "She's gritty - she's been through a lot. I'm glad she has you to let go with."

Nodding slowly, Arthur understood. He was a good partner, a good husband to Y/N. And it wasn't only the woman he loved more than his own life saying it - it was her closest friend, her confidante. Intermittently, his conditions made it difficult, particularly on those days when he needed repeated validation, or the fury he carried deep within him threatened to bubble up. (Though it had gotten better with treatment, the stability his life now had, and Y/N's support.) Patricia recognized that he was trying and believed he was doing well. Accomplishment wasn't a sensation he often experienced, but the foreign sensation creeping into him must have been it. "Thanks," he said, clearing his throat. "I love her a lot, too."

They went inside and put up the chairs and set the table. There wasn't a table cloth, but Y/N had taken out their "good plates," with gold filigree on the rims. One of their cotton napkins went missing, so Y/N put a paper towel under her cutlery. After he lit the two cream taper candles he'd found in a drawer, everything looked perfect.

The food and drink were something else. The only macaroni and cheese Arthur had ever had come out of a box. Patricia's tasted savory rather than salty, but he wasn't sure if he liked the tomatoes it had in it. Although the pasta was too soft, Y/N's lasagna was good, if a bit heavy on the sauce. The garlic bread helped with that. The salad was mostly ignored; he only ate the small serving she stuck on his plate. The scotch Gary brought was passed between himself, Matt, and Robert. Arthur did try a sip, but it was exceedingly strong and stole his breath. He decided to stick with wine.

As the evening went on, Arthur grew pleasantly warm and drowsy. Y/N and Patricia had taken over most of the banter, guffawing and being mildly foolish. Matt had brought a chocolate sheet cake for twenty-four instead of six, and Y/N had to hold her stomach to quiet her tipsy laughter when it was sliced. Arthur's hand crept to her thigh and squeezed lovingly, his eyes locked on her with adoration. The depth of his feelings, his keen awareness of her, her presence at his side, was drowning out the rest of the room. It didn't take long for her to turn to him and mouth, "Let's say good night."

Y/N sent everyone home with leftovers and a hug, and forced Matt to take most of the cake with him. Gary gave Arthur a wink and a nod as he left, and Arthur snorted as he shook his head and shut the door. Propping himself against it, he sighed, trying to clear the fuzziness from his head. She came up behind him and kissed his shoulder. "Patricia's going to have the photos developed in triplicate and give us the negatives."

He twisted to face her and put his arm around her shoulders, slightly dizzy. "Does that mean we'll get copies?"

Giggling, she pressed into him and nuzzled his cheek. "Yes. We'll get three copies." She looked up at him as she leaned back. The ardor in her gaze made his pulse skip a beat. Then she lead him to the bedroom without preamble, blowing out the candles on the way.

He'd read and seen enough to recognize what was expected of him. This was their wedding night. It was when the music would swell and the screen dissolved to black in the old movies he would watch. He was supposed to take charge and make love to her. And he wanted to. Truly. But he'd eaten more than he usually did in two days. That combined with only having slept a couple of hours the previous night, anticipation having kept him awake on Gary's couch, lead to the tiredness he now felt.

Her hands were everywhere, though, roaming his back as their mouths melded together. Arthur slid his tongue between her lips, and he could taste the wine they'd toasted with and spent the rest of the night drinking. Breathing raggedly, he swallowed her moan and held the nape of her neck. When she presented her back to him, he paused before caressing the lace on the back panels of her dress. He took the dainty zipper between his thumb and forefinger and slowly pulled it down. The intimacy of what was happening, of Arthur Fleck unfastening the dress of his bride, made him shudder. Once the bodice was completely undone, he pushed his forehead to her and kissed the soft skin at the top of her back.

The dress fell slowly, catching on her breasts and hips as she brought it down. When she turned to him, his brows lifted. She was wearing the smallest pair of black panties he had ever seen. They barely covered her sex. He huffed. "Where did these come from?"

A grin broke out across her cheeks. "Patricia was convinced you'd love them."

Smirking, he gave a little nod. "I do." They were tied at her waist. If he just pulled the string, she'd be revealed to him. "You're so pretty." His fingers teased a bow, trying to will himself to perform. But he wasn't feeling it. "Um." He chuckled sadly, knowing he was about to disappoint her. "I ate too much. And I think I'm drunk. I'm sorry." He winced and looked away from her.

Y/N stared at him, then laughed throatily and squeezed him close. "Oh, thank god. Me, too. It's been a busy day."

His grasp on her tightened. "But a good one?"

"A wonderful one." She pecked his mouth and moved towards the bed, not bothering to take off her bra before slipping beneath the blankets. "You can untie me in the morning."

As Arthur undressed, he folded each piece of clothing and placed it on top of the vanity. He'd take care of it whenever they got up. By the time he sat on the bed in his briefs to take off his socks, Y/N's breathing had slowed to a steady rhythm. Sleep always seemed to come easily to her. Carefully, he got in beside her and stroked her hair back. Not wanting to wake her but needing to touch her, he kissed her brow bone faintly, gliding his fingers along her cheek. Then he ran his hand down her side and teased the string on her hip, loosening the knot until he could whisper his fingertips over her without obstruction. She mumbled quietly but didn't stir.

Smiling, he breathed against her temple. "I hadn't been happy one minute of my entire fucking life before you." He sniffled and swiped at his nose, sighing contentedly. "Sometimes I am now. Like today." He rested his head next to hers on the pillow, his arm going around her waist to tuck her back against him. "Thanks, Y/N Fleck."

~~~~~

Tag list (Let me know if you want to be added!): @harmonioussolve​ @ithinkimaperson​ @sweet-nothings04​ @stephieraptorr​ @rommies​ @fallenstarsabyss​ @gruffle1​ @octopus-plasma​ @tsukiakarinobara​

[randomguywithwords]

Thanks For The Assist: Chapter 2 (Itsuka X Neito Story)

AO3 Link: Here

Chapters: 1

Chapter 2: Acceptance

––––––––

“How was the test?” Father asked as the three of them sat at the dinner table eating. 

“Ok, I think I did fine,” Monoma said as he picked up a slice of meat.

“How were you graded?” Mother said. 

“Fought some robots. You get points the more you destroy. The harder the robot, the more points you get. The field was massive, pretty much a life-size city, and I think they had at least 3.” Monoma explained with patience, though he suspected this expositioning was boring the other audience with information they already knew. 

Mother hummed her assent. “I’m not surprised. U.A has a ton of money. More money than they need, really…” She ended her statement in a mutter. It sounded like constrained resentment to Neito. It probably was, but understandable. 

“Isn’t the ministry diverting more money towards your school, dear?” Father said. 

“Yes, I suppose. After years of appeals by the school committee. Hopefully I can obtain better equipment to teach those kids.” Mrs Monoma sighed, looking back towards Neito. “But I hope you get in, Neito. I have to admit, it’s really once-in-a-lifetime, and U.A will make you a fine hero.”

“Thanks, mother.” Neito smiled. A fine hero. The phrase did not apply to him, not in the societal nor linguistic sense of the word. A hero relied on himself to get the job done, at the end of the day. With what he had, that was an impossibility. 

“None of the other kids gave you trouble, did they?” Father asked, and Monoma winced on the inside, thinking about the events transpiring just after the test. 

“No, they were nice people,” He said. It was no lie, by technicalities. There was that girl, after all. Kendo, was it? She was nice. 

Father seemed to perk up at his answer, gladdened. “That’s good,” He gave an approving nod. “I’m glad they weren’t like your schoolmates.”

Neito waved his hand like an aristocrat at a banquet. “Nah, I think maybe those guys were just ––” He struggled for the proper word. “Lame.” He ended, and grinned internally at the apt description of his dialogue. But that smile died in the next instant when he thought about what he had wanted to say. 

Flat characters. A character with one dimension, owning a singular character trait to serve a purpose in a story. That’s what he called them, but not Mother. 

“About time kids your age learned some maturity,” She said, her ‘teacher’ side emerging. “Not you, Neito – of course. You’re a sensible boy. Apart from your silly theatrics, but you’ll grow out of it.”

There it is, He sighed, on the inside – or, aside. That was how the plays would state inner actions on the script. But Mother doesn’t like plays, does she now? 

“Neito, tell us about the fighting,” Father interjected with a smile that was a bit too wide, “What quirks did you use?” 

Neito gave a response, but his heart was no longer in the conversation, having been chilled by Mother’s own lovely warmth that she had no idea she was radiating. 

–––––

The letter came a week later when his parents were at work. Neito opened it up in his room. After all, where else would he? Only in his room could he find solace. And on his bed, comfort, so he plopped himself down and opened the envelope. 

The contents contained a disc. A holographic. Taking it out and laying it on his bed, he pressed the blue button in the centre, producing a video on the wall.

It was the scene of an office, with a mouse sitting on a chair and a cup of tea on the glass table. He recognised the principal of U.A himself.

“Neito Monoma! Very good afternoon, or morning, or night, to you – depending when you see this, of course. On the off chance you are unaware of me, I am Nezu, principal of U.A High. This video is approximately 5 minutes long, but I will save you the suspense. You got in. Congratulations.”

His heart soared, and he pumped a fist in the air, breathing a sigh in much-desired catharsis. Had he been holding that in since the beginning? 

“You are, both celebrating – I would hope, and also wondering what the remaining 4 and a half minutes are about. Please do not ignore the rest of this video, because I want to review two things: your performance at the entrance exam, and your quirk. Take a look at this.” 

The video showed clips of Monoma from a birds’ eye view, running around and using his borrowed quirks, as well as him tapping random strangers. He noted how a lot of them turned their heads in evident surprise and puzzlement at him patting them on the shoulder or arm. And then the clip played of him taking a couple of points away from those guys. 

Nezu clucked his tongue. “Many in society would deem that as ‘un-hero-like’ behaviour, as it can be interpreted as stealing, or taking what does not belong to you. Criminal acts indeed, if the deed is severe and the stolen thing valuable. But, your quirk acts on that very principle of taking what does not belong to you.”

The (overwhelmingly intelligent, Monoma realised) mouse continued, “I’ve taken the liberty of reviewing your application and academics. You boast admirable grades in your middle school, and your form teacher commented that you were a highly observant, smart and mature student. I could go on, but you know what you’ve submitted. I will continue with that presumed knowledge.”

“You must have realised by now, or very early on in your career as a hero aspirant, that your quirk is unorthodox, having no use on its own. You require allies, or foes who you can lay a finger on, to fight. And even then, you must hastily adapt to whatever quirk you have under your control, for a period of time. Lots of limitations, Mr Monoma. A lot of challenges you have faced, are facing, and will face. And when you are initiated into my school, expect more.” Nezu took a sip of his tea.

“That’s not to say you will face difficulties many would describe as ‘hell’ at U.A. And neither does my previous statement imply U.A is not ‘hell’.” He paused. “Do excuse my roundabout mannerisms of speech. It is a bad habit of mine.” Nezu chuckled.

“Simply put, I have taken a personal interest in you, Mr Monoma, for your cunning, your intellect, and your quirk. Report to me after your first day of school. We will talk more then. Congratulations once more. Another letter will arrive tomorrow to inform you of the minutiae regarding your inception into U.A. Good day, Neito Monoma.”

The holographic faded out, and Neito was staring at a blank wall for a few seconds trying to process whatever Nezu had said.  

A buzz from his phone pulled him out of his hazy thoughts. He is...really smart. 

It was from Kendo. “Hi, Monoma, It’s Kendo! The girl with big hands. Wanted to ask you whether you received the letter from U.A.” 

He typed a response. “Yeah, I got a letter. What’s your verdict?” 

Fingers crossed. 

She responded, “I got in. >< You?” 

A smile spread across his face. “Same, that’s awesome. Congratulations.”

“YAY! :D We both did it! Congrats too! And I was so shocked that All Might was in the video! I nearly cried. Or maybe I did, idk. Sorry, I’m babbling at this point, but I don’t have anyone else to tell this to until my parents get home and I’m so hypeddd”

Huh? All Might? So Nezu specifically…

He typed, “It’s ok, I’m excited too. Though I don’t express it over text that much.” 

“Haha it’s ok. Can’t wait for the letter tomorrow. There’s so much to do! Hero costume, uniforms, books, all that. And term starts a month from now. Can’t wait!” 

“Wow, how’d you know all this?”

“Mainly from the internet. I was that hyped, y’know?”

He cracked another smile from her enthusiasm. It was oddly contagious, and he found himself more zealous to go to school. That was a statement he’d never think he could formulate in his mind. “I see. That’s cool.”

“Btw, if you wanna go celebrate with your family or friends, go ahead! I don’t wanna hold you back.”

“Nah, my parents are at work and I’m basically alone at home. Same boat as you. So, fire away.”

“Ah, ok!” 

The conversation continued with Kendo gushing about their new life, and Monoma passively followed along, inserting a few comments here and there. But he didn’t feel like he was stuck at a family reunion forced to endure his grandfather’s stories with a placating smile and affirming nods peppered in occasionally. She was actually interesting, and amusing, in a good way. 

The topic was centered around school and academics, with little butting into personal lives, and Monoma didn’t pry. She was still a stranger, somewhat, albeit she would be his new schoolmate – and perhaps classmate. He crossed his fingers again, hoping that Fate would tap him lightly on the head once more with her providence. 

He smiled when Kendo typed, “Hope we become classmates :D. Apparently there are always 2 first-year classes. So it’s basically a coin flip.”

“Heads.” 

“Rly? Do you always choose heads?”

“Yeah.” 

“I’m more of a switcher.”

“How do you decide when to choose heads or tails then?”

“Coin flip.”

“That made me laugh, thank you.”

“Why do you need to thank people for making you laugh? It’s a spontaneous thing.”

“That’s...oddly profound.”

“Or just a dumb statement made to sound fancy. Ah, sorry, I have to go now. But thank you for your time. It was great chatting :)” 

“Why do you need to thank people for chatting with you? It’s a spontaneous thing. Joking aside, thank you too.”

“Nice haha” Was her last message. Neito turned his phone off and lied down on his bed. A moment passed, and Neito took a coin from his study desk. It was a silly thing to do, but his room was his stage. He was performing for himself. 

He gave it a toss and caught it. 

Seeing the result, he grinned.

–––––––

Yeek, this took longer than it should have, sorry. Had a bit of writer’s block when it came to planning this thing and I wasn’t sure how to move on. Also the tone of this is especially terrifying for me because it’s definitely going to be (ironically) more light-hearted, with Monoma’s dramatic language and (side thoughts) occasionally inserted, but that brings the challenge of need. When to do that, when not to. This story is a personal challenge to change my narrative style just slightly. 

Anyway, I hoped you MonoKendo ppl liked it. A lot of people have told me it’s unfortunate the ship lacks content and I couldn’t agree more. But then again, that’s about 75% of the ships out there. (Fk it, 90%). So, here’s my contribution, alongside some other one-shots. 

Feedback’s appreciated :D

[fairytalelovedramas]

Asian Drama Watchlist & Review for Jan 2020

Wow, got through a lot of shows and films this month compared to my norm (probably due to my lack of a social life, but meh, that’s beside the point)!!!

So here are my thoughts and reviews for the shows I watched in January...  probably not going to be completely spoiler free

And yeah this got long, so putting my reviews below the break so it doesn’t take up the whole wall!!

Finished Watching this month:

1) Ashes of Love

Wowww, what a journey this show takes you on!!  It took me awhile to get through, as I often find with Fantasy CDramas, as I find it hard to binge too many eps at a time, but I was hooked from the start!  I love the actors, the characters, I loved the leads but fell in love with several side characters as well, the angst gave you all the feels, there were plenty of funny moments, and the love stories really made your heart flutter (I especially fell in love with the side love story, which is rare for me!).  Really loved this one!

Where I watched: Viki, also on Netflix

2) TharnType the Series

Hands down one of my favorite BL couples!!  Their chemistry is out of this world.  Are there problematic parts of the show?  Yes, most definitely, especially near the beginning, but their connection and sweet moments are worth it, and honestly I just made up my own head cannon where those parts don’t exist haha!!  I LOVE this couple, they way they look at each other and all the touches, ugh it just does things to me!!  And their acting was fabulous, I fell in love with Mew (more than I already was) and Gulf as well!

Where I watched: Links to Line TV (found on Official TharnType Twitter)

4) Coffee & Vanilla

Skinship, Skinship, Skinship!!  From ep 1, I was like woah!  So I started this one because I saw the 2 leads in Good Morning Call and think Dori Sakurada is just a beautiful human being and had SLS big time, so was curious to see him get the girl this time!!  And yeah he didn’t disappoint, he’s gorgeous and whoooo did that boy have some kinks!  Honestly, I thought their chemistry was good and I thoroughly enjoyed all the skinship scenes, if anything I would have been happy to see more of his kinky side actually get reciprocated haha!!  I personally enjoy a clingy, head-over-heels in love ML, and am for the alpha-male/innocent girl dynamic, and that’s exactly what you get!!!

I can see why this show wouldn’t be for everyone though, it has problematic parts for sure! It has a really weak FL who doesn’t really have a lot of character growth (despite her saying at the end she got stronger, I was like really??  fooled me!  but at least she’s aware of her weakness??), but her “innocent” character is one of the things that drives the story so it didn’t bother me that much.  I could have done without so much manhandling (by pretty much every male in the series).  I could see how it could be triggering for some.  I also thought she had the worst best friend in the world and was way too forgiving.  But if you can get over these points, I enjoyed it quite a lot! I may make some gifs for this one since there are several scenes I liked and no one seems to be making any!!

Where I watched: Viki

3) He is Psychometric

So this was different than I expected.  Not bad by any means, just different.  I was expecting more romance, more healing from shared trauma, etc.  Maybe I was hoping it would be a bit more like Just Between Lovers after seeing that first ep and the trauma?  But I know nothing will ever replace that show in my heart, it will always be a fave!  Anyways, this wasn’t like that one haha!  It was a lot more mystery/crime genre than anything, which isn’t my fave, but there were a few sweet moments and the acting was sooo good and by the time I realized the romance & story wasn’t really what I was expecting I was drawn into the mystery I had to know how it ended!

Where I watched: Viki

5) Theory of Love

I love OffGun as celebrities and in their variety shows, but never saw them in a series so decided to give this one a go!  Wow, I totally ended up in a major binge session with this one!! I didn’t want to stop watching!  I’ve always thought Gun was a cutie, but after seeing him act I have a whole new respect for him.  Did I think it was one of the best BL stories I’ve seen?  No.  But they have great chemistry and it was a cute story overall!  Really enjoyed this one!!

Where I watched: YouTube (GMM channel)

6) Dark Blue Kiss

I’ve seen the various Kiss prequels so was excited about this one!  Honestly, I felt the MorkSun story overpowered PeteKao a bit but am not complaining as I loved both stories!  There were a lot of sweet moments and just enough angst to keep you interested.  But above all, I have to say the superstars of the series were the parents!!  The acceptance every person should get, open talks about sex and condoms, advocating for your child, I mean it really doesn’t get much better!  It hit on many important lgbtq topics and for that alone I thought it was very well-done!  All the couples were very cute and made me root for them!

Where I watched: YouTube (GMM channel)

7) Love by Chance (rewatch)

In prep for the 2nd season I decided to rewatch LBC in a binge session!  Oh my goodness, I forgot how much I missed AePete, I fell in love with them big time the first time around and all of that just came rushing back.  I’m reeeally going to miss Pete in season 2!!!  Their relationship is just so healthy compared to most in the BL world and their chemistry is sooo good!!  They better at least let them stay happy and in love even if Pete is abroad!!  I admit I was never one to get crazy about TinCan, but knowing they’ll be the center of season 2 I watched their scenes more closely and definitely felt a stronger pull for them this time around.  I’m very excited to see how their story continues!!!!

Where I watched: Youtube (Studio Wabi Sabi channel)

8) The Hows of Us

This filipino film stars one of my fave love teams... KathNeil!!  I love their films and that they are a reel to real couple as well!!  I enjoyed this movie a lot, it was more mature than many of their previous works together and showed how they’ve been growing.  It wasn’t a typical falling in love story that ends when the couple gets together but explores how couples grow apart and how real life can sometimes get in the way of our dreams.  I found the film relatable and also optimistic.  And I love the pining and longing looks... that always gets me and there was a lot of it in this film!!

Where I watched: TFC

9) Hotel Del Luna

This is what kdramas are all about - Superb acting, gorgeous cinematography, interesting characters, beautiful OST, the whole production was incredible!  It wasn’t my favorite story ever and it took me several months to finish but it kept puliing my back in and I finally got through it.  I really was mesmerized each ep by how beautiful the whole thing was.  I liked the back story and all the fun side characters. And I swear it was worth watching just for IU’s costumes, hair, and different styles alone!!  I didn’t love the ending, that was my biggest complaint, I guess you could call it “open?”  I just think it could have wrapped up better, but overall it was a beautiful series!

Where I watched: Viki

10) Itsuka, Nemuri Ni Tsuku Hi (Someday When I Fall Asleep)

Wow what a trippy series.  It was short enough to binge in one afternoon and it looked interesting, so that’s exactly what I did.  It was intriguing from the start and there was a mystery about it that kept my interest, it was a bit creepy at times, and had some twists I totally was NOT expecting at all.  Overall it was one of those that made me think and ponder for awhile after, but it did make me a bit sad too, so only watch if you’re willing to experience some feels, but it was a good one and I’m glad I stumbled upon it!

Where I watched: Viki

Currently Watching for Feb:

1) Guardian (woah, another good “bromance” with all those looks!)

2) The Untamed (rewatch - and so far it’s even BETTER the 2nd time around!!!)

3) ‘Cause You’re My Boy (cute so far)

4) Moment of Eighteen (my Astro loving heart was so excited to see Moonbin!!)

5) Until We Meet Again The Series (so many feeeels)

6) Why R U? The Series (jury is still out but I LOVE Saint!)

7) Itaewon Class (super excited for this one, Park Seo Joon, need I say more?!)

8) Crash Landing on You (excellent so far!)

9)  Make it With You (filipino series starring my FAVE love team, LizQuen!!)

[kasdeyathebitterwoman]

A Ninja Warrior Love Story - Part 1

Welcome back to the world of Lily and Henry! Honestly, I have no idea how I ended up deleting my old account, but I’m genuinely more upset that I had no backups of my original work. That aside, I am beginning the slow process of rewriting my original series, A Ninja Warrior Love Story. I hope you enjoy it! 

Let me know of any other imagines or one-shots you’d like to see! Also, if you’d like to be added to the tag list, just send me a message!

CW: none

Word Count: 2,230

The Story: Lily is a single woman working at a parkour gym when she meets Henry Cavill. Are they meant to fall in love or is it just a one-time thing? 

At 4:30 in the morning, Lily’s alarm went off. She rolled over in her small bed and smacked her alarm to turn it off. Groaning, Lily pushed herself out of bed. With two steps, she cleared the small apartment bedroom and entered the even smaller bathroom. With the efficiency of a well-known routine, Lily got dressed in simple workout clothes. She glanced in the mirror to see a tired face looking back. For the past six months, she had been working hard to earn extra income so she could afford time off and a plane ticket to see her best friend at college. So far, it wasn’t really working out, but she had been able to save some money.

Once dressed, Lily dashed out to her beat-up old truck right outside her apartment. At 4:45 am, no one was out on the roads, so she wasn’t concerned about being late for one of her three jobs. Lily worked at a gym - not just any gym though. This was a Ninja Warrior gym. About four years ago, Lily met the gym owner, Donovan, who offered her a chance to work out at his gym. He remembered her from her track days and wanted someone to open his gym in the mornings since he was, in his words, allergic to any time before nine am. Lily quickly and easily agreed and almost immediately found herself in a world of her wildest dreams. She loved working out and training on the courses there and even considered applying to be on the show one day.

Five minutes to 5 am, Lily pulled up to the Hustler Ninja gym in Taylor, Texas. Taylor was about 45 minutes outside of the DFW area. It was basically the middle of nowhere with one good Walmart, a ghosted - albeit historic - downtown square, and surprisingly a very fancy looking Hilton resort. The keys jangling in the lock, Lily opened the gym and began turning on the lights. Donovan rented the building which was incredible in size. Large enough to house two ninja warrior obstacle courses, a half rock wall in the back, a decent-sized free-weight section, and even an outdoor mini-course. The whole place was huge and everything Lily wanted in a gym. Within two months of working there, she’d been promoted to assistant manager. She was here every Monday through Friday from 5-9, then Monday through Thursday, she went to work at her uncle's barbershop. Finally, on Fridays and Saturdays, she worked at one of the three bars in town to earn as much extra income as possible.

After dropping her gym bag in the locker room, Lily stepped out into the gym and looked around. Donovan and Daniel, or The Dude, did a good job cleaning up last night. It was actually a little surprising considering they rarely did any cleaning. Lily usually spent most of her time cleaning up after everyone. Weird. Regardless, she enjoyed the reprieve and made her way to the free-weights to start a warm-up. After 15 minutes, she was ready to begin her real training. It started with the salmon ladder followed by a few balance obstacles and finally ending with a grip training on the waving board. She was enjoying herself and almost didn’t hear the front door open again. Glancing over, she saw a tall, long-haired figure striding past her towards the locker rooms.

“Morning, Dude,” she called out. The Dude smiled and waved at her and continued on to the locker rooms. A few minutes later, The Dude appeared ready to go in long shorts, a fitted t-shirt and his long hair pulled back in a low ponytail. The Dude was the only guy Lily could think that could pull off the man-tail well. He saddled up to her and watched her jump down from the wave board.

“Morning Luck,” The Dude said to her. Lily groaned and rolled her eyes.

“Can’t anyone forget about that?!” she asked, jumping down off the raised platform and stood next to him. In comparison, Lily looked relatively tiny. Where she was about 5’5” of lean muscle, The Dude was 6’4” of muscle and weight. He got his nickname from his long hair and easy-going attitude. The Dude laughed, throwing his head back a little.

“Nope, it was too adorable,” he replied, making Lily roll her eyes even harder. “So you excited about tomorrow?” he asked when he finally stopped laughing. Lily looked at him confused.

“What’s happening tomorrow?” she asked in response to his question. The Dude looked down at her stunned.

“Tomorrow? The big celebrities are coming by the gym to check it out?” he said as if she should know already. Lily continued to look surprised by his information. “It was in the email that Donovan sent like, two weeks ago.” Lily scoffed.

“You are aware I haven’t actually checked my email since probably about 2016, right?” This time The Dude rolled his eyes at her.

“Aren’t you a manager here or something?” he asked. Lily laughed.

“Or something,” she replied. The Dude laughed with her.

“Girl, get it together,” he said, gently pushing her shoulder. “Tom Cruise and that guy that played Super Man are coming by to check out the gym. They need parkour training and Donovan is going to teach them.” Lily’s eyebrows shot up.

“Are you serious?” she asked. Tom Cruise was major. She remembered watching some of his old movies with her dad. Suddenly a pain gripped her chest and she forced herself back into the present.

“100% serious,” he replied. Lily was shocked. She definitely needed to check her email more often. They stood there talking about their favorite Tom Cruise movies for a few minutes when the opening of the front door caught their attention. Much to Lily’s surprise, her old “friend” Celeste walked in the door. Celeste was a tall beauty with olive skin, long brown hair, and stunning green eyes. She had on a matching navy blue sports bra and leggings which showcased her olive skin perfectly. Her brown hair was pulled back into a tight, clean ponytail and even from the distance she was at, Lily could tell the woman was wearing makeup.

“Well I’ll be damned,” The Dude said under his breath. Lily watched incredulously as Celeste found them and made her way across the room to them.

“Hey guys!” she said awkwardly breathlessly as she stopped just short of the two of them. The Dude and Lily exchanged a look before turning back to Celeste.

“Hey Celeste,” The Dude said cautiously. Celeste gave him a wide, fake smile that made Lily’s intestines turn. “What brings you back to the gym? We figured you didn’t have a membership anymore.” He didn’t have to look at Lily to know what she was thinking. Celeste waved her hand dismissively.

“No, silly,” she started. “I just took a few months off; went back to Cali for a few weeks; saw my brother in New York,” she made a point to look directly at Lily. Lily immediately dropped her gaze and felt her ears grow warm with embarrassment. The Dude cleared his throat.

“Sounds fun,” he said, disdain evident in his voice. Celeste picked up on it and smiled warmly.

“I just wanted to come back and get back into my routines,” she said. A thought occurred to Lily and her eyes shot up.

“You were hoping to see one of those celebrities,” Lily said, more accusation in her tone than she meant. It didn’t matter because she was right. It was evident on Celeste’s face. Celeste shifted in her spot.

“No, of course not, why would I be excited to meet a celebrity? I’ve met dozens of them already,” Celeste replied. Lily smirked realizing she’d made her uncomfortable.

“They’re not here,” Lily said, causing Celeste to look her in the eyes. “They won’t be here until later.” Lily glanced over at The Dude to see if he would correct her. He didn’t.

“Oh, okay,” Celeste said, glancing around the empty gym. “Well, I guess I’ll go get ready to work out then. It’s been great catching up with you two,” and with a small smile and shoulder shrug, Celeste bounced off to the women’s locker rooms. The Dude and Lily watched her leave and once she was safely away in the locker rooms, Lily looked directly at The Dude who shared a similar look.

“Fuck,” she sighed.

—

At around 8:30, Lily dashed from the gym floor to the locker rooms. She quickly showered and dressed in her usual barbershop attire: dark jeans, a blue or gray t-shirt, and her black and white Converse. Her general wardrobe consisted of these same pieces, with a few variations in the mix. She walked out of the gym to find The Dude helping another regular, Megan, on the rock wall. Though he was tall, The Dude was nimble and able to understand situations that required a certain skill. She walked over to them.

“Watch your heels, Rapunzel,” Lily called out to Megan. Her nickname came from the fact that Megan had insanely long blonde hair. It was beautiful and well-kept, but extremely long. Lily loved it. Megan grunted in response and did her best to heed Lily’s advice, but unfortunately couldn’t quite get it. She stumbled backward and landing on her feet on the mat. Groaning, she turned around to Lily and The Dude.

“I’m never going to get it,” she said with pained certainty. Lily smiled at her.

“You’ll get it,” she said. “You just have to stop pushing it and start feeling it,” she looked over at The Dude who was rolling his eyes at her.

“Haha, very funny,” he said, making Lily and Megan laugh. Lily smiled at The Dude.

“Well, I’m out y’all,” she said waving at both of them. Megan and The Dude waved back and Lily headed out to her truck. It was a very old, very beaten blue Chevy Silverado. It was actually her dad’s, but he had no need for it any more, so Lily got it. One of the few good things her dad did for her. She climbed in, started the loud engine, and puttered off into town.

The barbershop where she worked was in the historic downtown square of Taylor. Her uncle Ray owned the shop and had for several decades. Ray was an older, stout man of 60. He had a decent sized beer belly, a handlebar mustache, and piercing blue eyes. Ray wasn’t actually Lily’s uncle, but he was as close to one as she could get. He took care of her during her senior year of high school and later on when she returned from college to find nothing and no one waiting for her.

Parking her car just outside the shop, Lily got out and darted across the empty street to the diner. Inside, she ordered four cups of coffee to go and a few donuts for everyone. When she got her order, she once again crossed the empty street and walked into Ray’s shop. A few regulars were sitting in their respective stylists' chairs. Lily’s station was towards the front. She pulled a cup of coffee out for herself placing on her station, then went around the room handing the other cups of coffee out. Everyone greeted her with kindness and respect. They knew what she had been through with her parents.

Once everyone had their coffee, Lily settled in at her station and waited for her first customer, Mr. Ortiz. At 9:15, Mr. Ortiz hobbled into the shop and straight to Lily’s station. She jumped up and vacated her chair for him. He sat down and told her he wanted the usual, which for him meant a general trim of his hair and beard. Lily immediately got to work and 45 minutes later she was done and checking Mr. Ortiz out at the register. She sat back in her chair after cleaning up the area and decided to check her email. It was overflowing with spam and other junk, so she specifically searched for the email from Donovan. It was there postmarked two weeks ago. She opened it.

Hello team,

I hope this email finds you well. I want you to be the first to know that I have accepted the chance to teach and train two actors for an upcoming movie. They’ll be filming the majority of it in Texas, Oklahoma, and New Mexico, but we are one of the best-rated ninja warrior/parkour gyms in the country (go figure!). That means they will be here for a while getting the hang of certain moves and choreography.

The two actors in question are Tom Cruise and Henry Cavill. They are going to be here on Wednesday, the 17th at 7 am. We all know Lucky doesn’t read any of these, so someone please tell her. Other than that, you are all amazing!

Best,

Donovan Troy

Lily rolled her eyes at the line that she wouldn’t read the email. Though it was true, she hated how easy it was for him to read her. Anyway, she easily recognized Tom Cruise and could think of several movies she had seen him in. But, who the hell was Henry Cavill?

----

@taglist:

@maeleeme

[thebluemartini]

Far From the Shallow - Chapter 12 [Nessian Fic]

TITLE: Far From the Shallow SYNOPSIS: Post-ACOFAS. As part of a deal with Feyre, Nesta has agreed to live with Cassian in the Illyrian Mountains. However, shortly after her arrival, she receives the startling news that she’s pregnant from one of her one-night stands. While she tries to quickly get a grip on her life, Cassian’s determined to make her see that she’s not facing this alone.

FIC LENGTH: Multi-chapter (Total Chapter Estimate: 14)

PREVIOUS CHAPTERS: Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7 / Chapter 8 / Chapter 9 / Chapter 10 / Chapter 11

TAGGING: @bohemiandreams27 @queenofillea1 @trash-for-nessian @nestaarcheronwillkillme @my-fan-side @strangeenemy @maastrash @cageddovepoetry @bybooksanddreams @lilbat90 @ritamordio19 @mastercommandercaptain @feysand-dot-acotar @archeron-queen @welcometothespeaknowworldtour @empress-ofbloodshed @there-is-warmth-in-winter @mybbyfeyre @saltydreamcollector @justlikethecheshirecat @mis-lil-red @supebowlere @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @everything-that-i-love @sezkins79 @hashtolanashoba @lord-douglas-the-third @rhysandsdarlingfeyre @hikari274 @acotar-and-tog-for-life @ellenoftroy @ink-nibs @highlordofthenightcourttrash @sesquipedalian-aficionado @tintinnabulary

*This chapter is also posted on AO3 and FF.

A/N: Eeep! I’m so nervous posting this chapter since it’s the moment we’ve been waiting for!

(Please note, I definitely do not get into all the crazy details about childbirth. Also, this is a fae birth, so that’s my excuse if there’s anything that does/doesn’t happen that usually doesn’t/does happen during a human birth! Haha 😉)

________________________________________________________________ CHAPTER 12: May

As the days went by, Cassian woke up each morning, hoping he would hear from Nesta again.

He hadn’t heard from her since she sent him a message about the baby’s gender. The day after that, he had gone ahead and wrote her a simple question: How are you doing?

But a week went by, and he still hadn’t received a reply.

The lack of response saddened and frustrated him, but he still had the hope she would eventually contact him, considering she initiated the last conversation.

But now it was the first day of May. The month she was going to have her baby.

There was no way he was going to miss the birth of her baby. He wanted to give Nesta the space she desired, but at what point would he have to stop waiting for her and just go ahead and make his own move?

He needed to be there for her. No matter how much she may try to push him away, he would prove to her that he would still be there and that he loved her.

Just as he was about to leave the kitchen, a piece of parchment appeared on the table. As soon as Cassian saw it, he instantaneously reached for it as his heart hammered in his chest.

Bat boy,

Be at my apartment at midday.

-Amren

Cassian’s heart sank upon seeing it wasn’t Nesta’s handwriting.

Instead, it was a demanding note from Amren without an explanation for why he needed to visit.

Typical.

He wasn’t sure what this could be about. Visiting Amren wasn’t a usual part of his duties for the Inner Circle. She wasn’t usually involved with Illyrian matters.

He wondered if Nesta had listened to him when he told her to visit Amren about the siphon. Could it possibly be about that? He wasn’t sure what he would really need to do with the siphon. It had been unlinked. There was nothing more needed from him.

He picked up a pen to write back. Any special reason?

The response came quickly.

You’ll find out when you get here.

Cassian huffed at the vague reply. If he was going to be there at midday, he’d have to start flying out there now. But at least this gave him a reason to go to Velaris. Maybe afterwards, he would stop at Rhys and Feyre’s estate and attempt to talk to Nesta again.

Gods, it felt like it’d been ages since he last saw her.

As he left the kitchen and exited the cabin, he couldn’t help but feel slightly thrilled by the prospect of seeing her again later that day.

He just prayed she would be more receptive to what he had to say.

________________________________________________________________

Nesta sighed out of frustration as she made her way to Amren’s house. The message she received from her had been last minute and unexpected, demanding she come over to test something about her powers and to come right away.

Didn’t she realize that her baby could be born any day now? Her stomach was so large, making it hard to move about and slowing her down, elongating the journey to Amren’s. She couldn’t handle short notice, but when Nesta tried to protest in her message back to her, Amren got feisty right back at her, claiming that she must not care about potentially hurting her daughter with her powers.

Such a comment irritated her but also spurred her to get dressed and start making her way to Amren’s home. At least it was only the first day of May. Better to try out whatever crazy idea Amren had now instead of later on, when she was closer to Madja’s estimated due date of mid-May.

Soon, she’d be able to meet her baby girl. The thought always caused Nesta to bring her hand up to her stomach to feel her kicks, which were pretty constant now.

At least she had somewhere to live and her sisters would be around to help take care of the baby. Her relationship with them was still far from perfect, but they were slowly working through it.

But was she ready for the birth of her baby? She had no idea if anything could truly prepare her for it. She kept reading about it since she didn’t even know a single fae who’d had a fae child. Rhys, Azriel, and Amren had told her what they knew, but they didn’t fully know how it would go or what it would feel like or what the best ways to raise the baby would be.

She just wished...Cassian was here to handle the unknown with her. She moved her hand up to touch the red siphon that she now wore around her neck.

But he didn’t deserve to be saddled down with someone like her and taking care of a child that wasn’t his. He deserves someone better.

It was a moment of weakness when she decided to send him a message about finding out the baby was a girl. She’d been too wrapped up in the excitement of it to think straight. When he sent her a message the next day, asking how she was doing, she’d been in a clearer state of mind and was able to realize it would be better for her to not respond. To detach and distance herself.

And it would be healthier for her to stop thinking of him...

Soon, she reached the front door of Amren’s apartment and knocked.

“Get inside, girl!” she heard Amren shout through the door.

Nesta rolled her eyes at her impropriety before turning the knob and strolling inside.

She’d found Amren lounging around in the living room, eating some chicken and vegetables. “Come eat with me, girl,” she demanded as she gestured to the plate of food sitting on the end of the small table in the middle of the room.

Nesta gave her a peculiar look as Amren lifted the plate to her, and Nesta took a seat in the chair across from her.

Amren’s message had made it sound like this was an urgent meeting, and here she was, casually eating in the living room.

“I thought we were going to do something with my powers,” Nesta grumpily stated.

“In a moment,” Amren replied. “But first, we must eat.”

Nesta rolled her eyes at Amren’s eccentricities but figured she might as well feed herself and the baby, so she started eating.

A little while later, Amren stood up and started walking out of the room.

“Where are you going?” Nesta asked.

“To use the damned bathroom,” Amren muttered irritably.

Nesta continued to sit and eat, all while trying not to explode on Amren for ordering her to get here immediately when they weren’t even doing anything.

Suddenly, she heard a knock upon the front door, sparking Nesta’s curiosity. She wasn’t aware of anyone possibly joining them. She wasn’t in the mood to deal with anyone else either. Not that she ever really was.

“Answer that,” Amren dictated loudly from inside the bathroom.

Nesta groaned in annoyance as she carefully put down her plate, then slowly made her way over to the door, wondering why Amren didn’t bother answering the door when she arrived, but now, someone actually needed the door opened for them.

Upon swinging the door open, her eyes widened in surprise when she found Cassian standing before her.

He looked equally shocked to see her, with his mouth opening to speak, but no words came out.

“What are you...what are you doing here?” Nesta managed to ask. She’d intended for her words to have more bite, but instead they just came out slowly and calmly.

“What am I doing here? I think the better question is why are you here instead of in bed at the estate, waiting for the baby’s arrival?” he asked rather seriously, with his eyes filled with concern.

Nesta’s fiery nature kicked in. “I am perfectly able -” she began to defend herself, but suddenly an arrow came soaring over her shoulder and went straight for Cassian’s neck, piercing the skin.

Cassian plucked the arrow from the small wound as he grunted with pain before closing his eyes and instantly crumpling to the ground.

“CASSIAN!” Nesta exclaimed and tried to reach for him as he fell, but with her pregnant stomach, she couldn’t move fast enough to catch him. Nesta whirled around and found Varian standing in the room.

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?” Nesta yelled, and the burning in her hands ignited and she could feel power shoot out of her and hit Varian’s body. Instantly, she heard Varian’s heartbeat slow down. She didn’t even need to touch him for him to feel the effects, which may have been a result of the siphon that hung around her neck.

“PULL BACK, NESTA! CASSIAN IS FINE!” Amren exclaimed when she appeared in front of Varian. Immediately, when she stood in front of him, the blast of power had stopped.

Hyperventilating, Nesta glared at her as Amren turned around and inspected Varian’s body. He appeared to be breathing slowly.

“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON? WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO CASSIAN?” Nesta demanded to know as she carefully kneeled down beside Cassian’s unconscious body and ran her hand across his cheek to push hair away from his face. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw the rise and fall of his chest.

“He’ll only be knocked out for a half hour,” Amren calmly stated, still tending to Varian. “And it appears I was right. Your powers to harm come alive when you’re protecting someone you love.”

Love...

“THAT’S WHAT THIS WAS ALL ABOUT?” she shouted.

“Yes, now calm down already,” Amren ordered.

Nesta kept her eyes on Cassian and continued to stroke his cheek. She hated seeing him like this. Motionless and seeming lifeless. She hated that she’d already seen Cassian like this twice before, which still haunted her: at the hands of the king of Hybern and at the Dunclare camp in Illyria.

And while she knew she needed to detach herself from him, she still needed to make sure Amren spoke truthfully and make sure Cassian awoke.

So she waited. 

________________________________________________________________

Cassian opened his eyes.

He was lying on a couch. Amren’s couch, he had realized.

With a grunt, he sat up as he tried to recall how he got there. Thinking through the day, he remembered getting a note from Amren, flying to Velaris, knocking on her door, and then...and then he saw Nesta.

Nesta.

His heart started pumping fast.

And then some arrow had come flying out of nowhere and hit him.

When Amren walked in the room, he perked his head up. “Finally,” she remarked.

Cassian let out a huff. “What was that arrow all about?” he asked groggily.

“I had Varian shoot a drugged arrow at you to see if it would trigger Nesta’s powers, and I was right,” Amren bragged as she gave him a smug smile.

“You did what?”

“You heard me, boy.”

Cassian shook his head at Amren’s insane antics. But...but Nesta’s powers had been triggered. He started turning his head, looking to see if she was still around somewhere.

“She’s outside on the balcony,” Amren stated.

“Excuse me?”

“Don’t play dumb,” Amren remarked before turning and walking out of the room.

Cassian started rubbing his head over the spot where he he had fallen on it. That had been an extreme ploy to get Nesta’s powers to work. But what did this mean for her powers?

Getting up off the couch, he walked across the room, looking out the window as he headed to the door to the balony.  Outside, Nesta was sitting in a chair with one leg stretched out and propped up on another chair.

He could see how big her stomach had gotten, and how beautiful she still looked. She was still glowing. Just like the day they’d hosted the Illyrian camp leaders at his cabin.

At least she didn’t run away. She knew he was here and didn’t bolt. Perhaps, she was willing to talk to him. Carefully, he turned the knob to open the door to the balcony.

________________________________________________________________

When she heard the creak of the door behind her, she knew it was Cassian.

But she didn’t dare look back up at him, knowing it would send her heart thundering in her chest. Instead, she focused her gaze on her swollen foot that was propped on the chair.

He appeared in her peripheral vision and soon began to speak. “Your foot is swollen,” he observed.

“I’m aware,” she said casually.

“Do you want me to - ”

“No,” she interrupted him. From the way he leaned down and motioned to touch her lower leg, she knew he was about to offer to massage her foot. She wouldn’t be able to stand him touching her because she knew it risked making her want him all the more.

Plus, he’d already done so much for her. It wasn’t right for him to do any more for her.

Cassian then went over to the other side of her and sat down in the seat next to her.

“Amren said she figured out how to trigger your powers,” he said.

“It appears that they activate when I’m trying to protect someone,” she answered, neglecting to mention the other qualifier that Amren had said.

“I see you’re wearing the siphon,” he commented. “Did it help?”

The damned siphon he shouldn’t have given her.

“Yes,” she replied with a bit of an edge to her tone. Finally, she turned her gaze away from her foot and looked up at him. She regretted it as soon as she looked at him.

He was giving her the look, and she nearly stumbled over her words when she spoke again.

“Why...why would you give me this?” she asked, raising her voice out of frustration.

“Because that was our agreement for me breaking a promise.”

“But I didn’t know the pain it would cause you!”

“It doesn’t matter. I would do anything for you,” he noted earnestly.

Nesta shook her head and tilted her face away from him, wondering what the heck was wrong with him for saying such a thing.

“What is it?” he asked. “Why are you shaking your head? Do you honestly not believe me?”

“I don’t deserve you,” she whispered as a tear slipped out of her eye.

“Excuse me?”

“I don’t deserve you,” she said a bit louder and more forcefully.

“What is that supposed to mean? What makes you think that you don’t deserve me?”

Nesta continued shaking her head. “I’m a monster. Even your friends despise me for the way I act. The way I am. You should stay away.”

She thought of Mor’s feelings about her and her conversations with Rhysand. Neither of them liked her. Why would Cassian want someone who his friends despised?

“Would a monster sleep beside me to keep my nightmares away? Do everything she could to ease tensions with the Illyrians with me? Tend to my wounds when I’m injured? Not many people know the real you, Nesta, but I do. And I love you.”

“Stop saying that,” she stated with exasperation.

“I won’t stop speaking the truth,” he said firmly.

She couldn’t do this. She needed to get out of here. She’s seen him awake. She could go home now, knowing his was fine after being shot by the drugged arrow.

Bringing her foot down from the chair and standing up, she headed straight for the door to the apartment. Of course her movement wasn’t swift, giving Cassian ample time to get right behind her and raise his hand above her shoulder to hold the door closed as she tried to turn the knob and open it.

“Nesta,” he whispered, and she could feel his breath against the back of her neck. Having him so close sent her heart racing. “Talk to me,” he pleaded.

“About what?” she snapped.

“Did you read all my letters?”

“Yes,” she answered strongly.

“And did you talk to your sisters about the bond?”

“Yes.”

“And?”

“And what?”

He was still breathing on the back of her neck. It was driving her crazy, and yet she felt frozen in place.

“And what do you think of the bond?”

“And I don’t think…” she began before taking a deep breath. “I don’t think the bond determines how you feel.”

Cassian’s hand on the door slid down to encase her hand that rested on the knob. She could feel him get closer behind her, and he placed his hand against her shoulder blade. “Then what’s the problem?” he wondered quietly, with his lips close to the shell of her ear.

Nesta closed her eyes and resisted the urge to lean back into him.

“I told you,” she said forcefully, once she’d gathered her senses. “I don’t deserve you.”

Cassian sighed. “Stop being so ridiculous.”

“I am not being ridiculous,” she insisted as she released the door knob and turned around to face him, forcing Cassian to step back from her a little.

“Yes, you are!” he said loudly. “You’re just making up excuses because you’re afraid!”

Nesta narrowed her eyes at him and shook her head. “You’re delusional.”

“Sweetheart,” he said as he moved to grab hold of her hands, but she wouldn’t allow that. She quickly moved her hands out of his reach and whipped around her body to open the door. She stormed into the apartment, unable to shut the door behind her since Cassian was barging in right behind her.

“I’m done having this -” Nesta began to say before letting out a cry after feeling a burst of pain through his lower back and abdomen. The discomfort took her by surprise, causing her to lean her palm against the wall for support.

“Nesta, what is it?” Cassian asked in concern, immediately coming to her side and wrapping his arm around her. “Is the baby coming?”

The pains within her continued and she couldn’t help but keep letting out cries of anguish. This must be it. Her baby girl was coming. “Yes,” she said just before her knees buckled as she felt a raging contraction.

But Cassian was there and ready to catch her. With one arm at her back and the other beneath her thighs, he lifted her up in his arms. “AMREN!” he called out.

“WHAT!” Amren replied from another room.

“Contact Madja to meet us at Rhys and Feyre’s! The baby is coming!” he instructed.

Then he gazed down at Nesta as she clutched at her stomach. “I’ll fly you very carefully back to the estate,” he explained as he started walking at a quick pace toward the front door.

Once he stepped outside, they took flight.

________________________________________________________________

Nesta had a hard time focusing on what was going on around her. Her eyes were closed most of the time as pain wracked her body. The baby books had warned her that labor pains would be as bad as during menstruation, if not worse.

She vaguely remembered Cassian murmuring some things to her like “Hang in there, sweetheart,” as they flew back to the estate. Those words brought her no comfort as she still felt like she wanted to throttle someone.

Then when they reached the estate, there was a huge commotion, with her sisters, Rhys, Azriel, and Madja all gathered around. She remembered hearing Madja’s voice shouting over everyone to instruct Cassian to carry her upstairs to her room.

 All the noise was irritating.

When they reached her room, Cassian had gently laid her down on the bed as Madja rushed about to retrieve all that she needed. But based on all the chatter she heard, it sounded like many of the others had followed them upstairs, infuriating both her and Madja. She did not need to have her ears ringing from all this ridiculous noise on top of giving birth.

“EVERYONE NEEDS TO GET OUT,” Madja ordered loudly. “Cassian, are you staying in the room or not?”

This question caused her to shoot open her eyes. Looking up, she found Cassian standing over her, staring directly at her.

“It’s your call, sweetheart. Am I staying or am I going?” he asked.

Another contraction ripped through her body.

“IF YOU DARE TO ABANDON ME NOW, I WILL MURDER YOU,” she spat out fiercely without even thinking. Because, gods, she couldn’t even handle thinking right now. 

Despite the fact that she just yelled at him, Cassian beamed as he eagerly grabbed her hand.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he whispered. “Hang in there, sweetheart.”

________________________________________________________________

Watching Nesta be in labor for many hours was brutal.

Knowing how much pain she was in made it a horrifying experience because he couldn’t do anything except sit on a chair beside her bed, hold her hand, and wait. He couldn’t rid her of her pain.

Through the bond, he could feel a dull ache in his back and his stomach. He knew it was nothing compared to the torturous time she was having. She made sure he and Madja were well aware of that fact, with her shouts at them for not helping make the pain go away.

Which was another reason it was so brutal to watch her be in labor.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING WRONG? YOU KEEP FEELING MY STOMACH, YET THE BABY’S STILL NOT COMING. ARE YOU THAT INCOMPETENT?” Nesta shouted at one point when Madja felt around her bare stomach. 

“ARE YOU REALLY ABOUT TO ABANDON ME RIGHT NOW?” she screamed at another moment when he let go of her hand to get up to retrieve a cold, wet towel with the intention of placing it against her forehead.

She was constantly shouting about every little thing. She would reprimand him for gripping her hand too tightly then later say his grip was too loose. She would claim he was breathing too heavily on her, so he would turn his head slightly away from her, but then she’d wonder if she was too hideous for him to look at right now. 

But all throughout her outrageous complaints, Cassian reminded himself to remain calm and not engage in an argument with her. He’d always answer her sweetly and gently in an effort to please her as best as he could.

All while praying the baby would make her arrival very, very soon.

“Hang in there, sweetheart,” he stated for what was probably the hundredth time when she cried out in anguish.

She glared at him when she turned her face toward him. “THOSE STUPID WORDS AREN’T HELPING!”

Cassian fought the urge to sigh for fear of her complaining about that too. What else was he supposed to say in this moment?

 He decided to just say the next thing that came to mind.

“I love you, sweetheart.”

“WELL DESPITE YOUR UNHELPFULNESS, I LOVE YOU TOO.”

It felt as if his heart stopped. His thumb that had been rubbing circles on the back of her hand froze.

“What did you say?” he whispered as he looked at her curiously.

“YOU HEARD ME.”

“But...did you mean it?” he wondered. She had been saying crazy things all day.

“WHY WOULD I HAVE SAID WORDS I DON’T MEAN?”

“Well, earlier at Amren’s, you were telling me that -” he began to say, but Nesta cut him off.

“WELL YOU WERE RIGHT. I WAS AFRAID, DAMMIT.”

Cassian couldn’t the stop the huge grin from spreading across his face.

“DON’T YOU DARE GET COCKY JUST BECAUSE I SAID YOU WERE RIGHT,” she added.

“Oh, Nesta…” he murmured as he stood up from his seat to lean over and plant a kiss on her cheek. “I love you.”

Nesta sighed in annoyance. “I ALREADY KNOW.”

It was then that Nesta let out her loudest cry of agony yet, which caused Madja to press along her stomach again. “The baby is coming now,” she announced. “Push! Push!”

“You’ve got this, sweetheart,” he remarked as he felt her squeeze his hand tighter than ever before. “Keep pushing.”

Within minutes, they could hear the baby’s cries. Cassian looked at Nesta and the widest smile came across her face. Tears flooded out of her eyes as she breathed heavily. Cassian lifted their intertwined hands and placed a kiss on the back of her hand. “You did it, sweetheart.”

Soon Madja presented her with her cleaned-off baby girl swaddled in a blanket. Nesta released Cassian’s hand and eagerly took her into her arms. “Welcome, little one,” she said quietly as she stared at her in adoration. The baby settled down once she noticed her mother’s eyes looking at her.

Feeling like he was infringing on Nesta’s moment with her daughter, he took a few steps back.

“Where are you going?” Nesta asked as she perked her head up and looked at him.

“I thought you would want -” he started to say, but Nesta interjected.

“Come over here,” she implored.

Cassian immediately went and sat beside Nesta on the mattress, wrapping his arm around Nesta’s back while gazing down at her baby.

She looked so peaceful and innocent. Her face looked a lot like Nesta’s, especially the shape of her nose. It was...so incredible to see. He couldn’t help but smile down at her. “She’s beautiful,” he commented.

Nesta nodded in agreement.

“And so are you,” he added before kissing Nesta’s cheek.

“I love her so much already,” Nesta said breathlessly.

“What are you going to name her?”

Nesta turned to look up at him. “Would it be all right...if I named her Dahlia?”

Cassian’s breath stilled.

His mother. Nesta wanted to name her daughter after his mother. But how did she even know his mother’s name? He had never told her...

“You want to name her...after my mother?” he asked, stumbling over his words. “How...how did you even know my mother’s name?”

Nesta nodded. “Rhys told me. It seemed like the perfect name, after all you’ve done for me and for the baby because of your mother.”

“It was because of you that I - ” Cassian gently insisted.

“It was at least partly because of her,” Nesta interrupted as she gave him look as if to say Don’t deny it. “You didn’t want me to feel alone like she did...and I certainly didn’t because of you.”

Cassian hugged her tighter to him. “I’d be honored if you named her after my mother,” he whispered, unable to prevent the tear that glistened in his eye.

Nesta gave him a peck on the lips - their first kiss since the day he started the Blood Rite - before bending her head down to kiss her baby’s head. “Hello, Dahlia.”

“Hi, Dahlia,” Cassian said as he gazed down at her.

With the woman he loved beside him - who loved him in return - and a child he’d considered his own sitting before them...Cassian was certain he’d never felt this content in his entire life. 

________________________________________________________________

Once Madja had cleaned up the room and Nesta looked a little more presentable, her sisters, Rhys, and Azriel were finally permitted to enter the room and meet the baby. While Feyre and Elain were busy taking turns holding her and cooing to her, the males retrieved the crib and brought it inside Nesta’s room.

After a short while, Nesta’s exhaustion really hit her. Luckily, Madja realized this, shooing everyone off while insisting Nesta and Dahlia needed rest. Madja placed Dahlia to sleep in her crib, and Cassian had laid down beside her as they fell asleep together.

It must have been a few hours later when she felt Cassian stir beside her and remove his hand from its place on her waist.

She had assumed he had gone to the bathroom or went to retrieve food or drink, but when he didn’t return within a few minutes, she opened her eyes to find Cassian standing beside the crib, holding Dahlia in his arms as she rested her head on his shoulder.

Cassian swayed a little back and forth with her, rubbing her back as he did so.

It was a beautiful sight to see. When she had grown closer to Cassian, this is what she had been picturing what their life could be like. Their own little family.

When she had gone into labor, she found that she could no longer deny her feelings for him. She was tired of fighting them and she wanted him to be at her side, figuring out how to be parents together.

But she needed to be sure that this life was what he wanted.

Nesta sat up in her bed as she observed him gently lay Dahlia down in her crib. When he turned around, he appeared startled to see her awake and watching him.

“Sorry if I woke you,” he whispered as he returned to his place beside her in the bed. “I could hear Dahlia getting a little fussy, and I didn’t want her to start crying.”

Nesta scooted her body so she could wrap her arm around Cassian’s waist and rest her head against his bare chest. “Thank you,” she murmured.

Cassian entwined his fingers within her hair and started undoing her braid. “You’re welcome,” he said quietly.

Nesta started tracing the Illyrian tattoos on his chest with her finger. “Will you be a father to Dahlia?”

“I want so much to be a father to her,” he remarked as he continued to play with her hair. “But if I’m going to be her father, then you need to understand that I am never going to abandon her or leave her. I will always be a part of her life, which means I will forever be a part of yours, and I need to know where I stand with you.”

Nesta paused her tracing as she looked up at him, with her chin resting on his chest. “What do you mean?”

“More than anything, I want to be with you,” he stated tenderly as his fingers stilled within her hair. “Only you. And I need to know if you feel the same way. Because earlier, you told me you were afraid.”

Nesta sat back up again and placed her hands on the sides of Cassian’s face. “I love you,” she said. “I only want you. I still don’t think I deserve you and I think part of me will always be afraid that I’ll mess it all up somehow. But I’ve realized that I don’t want to take the risk of not being with you either. I don’t think I’m ready to accept the bond yet, so -”

“The bond isn’t important to me,” he interrupted gently. “Your love is enough.”

“You have it,” she whispered. “And I always want you to be in my life and to be with me.”

Cassian smile spread from ear to ear as he put his hands on her cheeks and tugged her face closer to him. “I love you, Nesta Archeron.”

“I love you, Cassian,” she managed to hurriedly say before his lips came crashing against hers to give her a passionate kiss.

After a few more passionate kisses, Nesta fell back asleep in his arms, feeling safe and secure, and the happiest she’d ever been. 

________________________________________________________________

The next week and a half had been filled with lots of grogginess, lots of breastfeeding, and a great desire for sleep. Nesta hardly left her room, let alone her bed, as her sore body recovered from giving birth.

Cassian rarely left her alone. Unless he was using the bathroom or cooking food for her, he was always there to help calm the baby, to bring Dahlia over to her bed, to bring her meals and eat with her, and help make sure she got at least some rest.

Feeling well enough to stand at least for a little while, she had put Dahlia down in her crib to sleep. As soon as she hit the crib, she wailed.

But then Cassian appeared beside Nesta, and Dahlia became silent, suddenly entranced by the movement of his wings. When he saw her staring at them, he deliberately began to flap them around a bit, intriguing her even more. Cassian chuckled as he did so, and Nesta couldn’t help but laugh herself.

“Too bad she wasn’t born with wings,” Cassian commented. “She seems rather fond of them.”

Cassian had told her the day after Dahlia was born that if she were part Illyrian, the wings would’ve been present at birth. But there were none.

When Cassian made the comment, Nesta couldn’t tell if he was relieved or disappointed. Would he have been jealous if she turned out to be the biological daughter of an Illyrian who wasn’t him?

But overall, he seemed so happy to be around both of them. And this easiness between them was so calming and pleasant.

But she knew that all good things must come to an end, including this fairytale-like lifestyle.

“When are you going back to Illyria?” she asked quietly once he settled down his wings as Dahlia finally closed her eyes to sleep, unable to keep them open any longer.

Cassian turned to her and gave her a peculiar look. “Sick of me already, sweetheart?” he questioned her back, but she could tell there was some hesitancy. His jesting wasn’t as smooth as it usually was. 

But she was determined to have fun with this.

“Well,” she said as she turned away from the crib and crossed the room to sit in front of her vanity. “Someone’s been taking apart my hair each day after I spend all this time braiding and styling it. It’s been quite inconvenient.”

“Is that so?” he growled with a smirk as he came up behind her. “It seems to me that you style it because you enjoy feeling my fingers run through your hair and take it apart.”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” she sternly said as she looked at his reflection in the mirror. “This cocky attitude of yours is also a problem.”

Cassian’s grin didn’t leave his face. “Any other complaints?”

As she eyed him in the mirror, she could see he was now giving her the infamous look. The look that sent her heart racing and made her feel anxious all at the same time.

“Well, the way you look at me sometimes…” she began confidently. “...makes me feel uneasy,” she finished in a whisper.

“I think you feel uneasy because you are having trouble resisting the urge to run your hands all over me.”

Nesta rolled her eyes at him. “There’s your irritating cocky attitude again.”

Cassian crouched down so the edge of his face was nearly touching her cheek.  “I can think of so many better uses for your mouth than spreading all these lies, sweetheart,” he stated huskily.

A slight blush crept up her face as she looked down at the vanity and thought of all the spots she’d love to kiss him on his body...

But she had to get back to the topic at hand. She leaned her head away from him.

“I can only handle your delusions for so long,” she said with a glint of amusement in her eyes. Then she shifted into a more serious tone. “When are you going back to Illyria?”

Cassian took a deep breath. “Well I would want to go back once you and Dahlia can go with me.”

Nesta took a deep breath. “I don’t think it’s safe for us to go back anytime soon,” she sadly pointed out. The Illyrians had already attacked them before and nearly succeeded because they thought her baby was his child. There was no way she would put Dahlia at risk. Especially when she’s just a baby.

“I know,” he expressed woefully as he sat on the edge of her bed behind her. “So until then, I’ll live here in Velaris - “”

“You can’t do that!” Nesta interrupted, slamming her hands on the vanity out of impassioned frustration. “You need to help the Illyrians change, not give them more reason to hate you for ruling over them from afar. They won’t accept that. They won’t change. They’ll just turn further against you!”

“Then...I won’t-”

“You better not be saying you’ll give up being the General Commander!” she interjected as she whipped around in her seat to face him.

“Well, technically I’m not because you’re not letting me get a word in, sweetheart!” he joked. But Nesta was no longer in the mood for jokes right now. This was serious. He had already done so much for her. She wouldn’t let him give up his status of General Commander.

Standing up in front of him, she put her hands on his shoulders as she spoke to him.

“You are going to go back to the camps and you are going to make them change their ways for your mother. And then you’re going to make it safe for me and Dahlia to come live there with you one day. You will not give up anything more for me. Is that understood?” she ordered him sternly.

“But I would give up everything for you,” he stated softly as he grabbed her arms and gently pulled her onto his lap.

“I know,” she replied softly. “But you don’t need to.”

Cassian let out a frustrated groan. “What am I supposed to do without you?”

“You wouldn’t be without us,” she noted as she wrapped her hands around his neck. “We’ll make this work. You could still visit us every week...Rhys and Feyre could perhaps help with winnowing you here often.”

“But they can’t do that for us forever.”

“I could learn how to winnow,” she suggested.

“Maybe in time, but you should focus on taking care of Dahlia for now.”

“Well, the faster you get the camps in order, the faster we can come home to Illyria,” she whispered and she could see the warmth in Cassian’s eyes when she said the word home.

Illyria was where she truly got to know Cassian. It was where shared secrets, experiences, and feelings had bounded them together. It was where she had fallen for him, and now...now home was wherever Cassian was.

As well as where Dahlia was. It hurt to say that she couldn’t go back with him to Illyria. But Dahlia’s safety came first.

Cassian hugged her to him, and she rested her head on his shoulder.

“I don’t like this,” he noted sourly.

“I don’t either,” she whispered. “But you owe it to your mother to put an end to their abuse and their injustice. If you gave up being General Commander, then...you wouldn’t be the man I love.” 

He heaved a sigh.

Nesta started rubbing the back of his neck. She knew he was feeling as sad as she was...but what else could they do? Illyria needed change. Dahlia needed safety. Her and Cassian still could be together...just not as often as they would like.

“Undo my hair as you love to do everyday,” she instructed.

Finally, the glint of wicked amusement returned to his eyes as he gave her a sly smile. “I think you mean it’s what you love me to do everyday. Actually, I think all your supposed complaints tonight were reasons you love me.”

“Mmm,” she moaned as she planted a kiss against his neck. “I don’t know about that,” she said with amusement.

“Cruel woman,” he remarked as he slowly weaved his hand within her hair. “I think you may be the one who’s delusional.”

“Maybe you should knock some sense into me,” she breathed.

“Gladly,” he answered before further twirling his fingers in her hair to destroy her braid and planting a fierce kiss on her lips.

Suddenly, they heard a loud wail coming from the crib. Cassian leaned his forehead against Nesta’s. “Well, I guess I’ll have to knock some sense into you later,” he said and Nesta laughed before they both got up from the bed to tend to Dahlia.

________________________________________________________________

A/N: Eeeee! The baby is here! Feelings have been revealed! Unfortunately, things aren’t perfect for Nessian…but hey, that’s life and they’re at least together!

There’s still 2 chapters left of this story to go! Next chapter is slated to be about both June and July and then the final chapter will be an epilogue.

Let me know all your feelings about this chapter! 😊 Thank you as always for your support! Everyone’s comments have been SOO sweet! I love you all!

---> CHAPTER 13

[doof-doofblog]

"Their Mum Isn't Even Here, Jean!"

Monday 18th May 2020

Good Afternoon folks! I hope you've all had a good week, I'm sure you've all been made aware of the recent EastEnders news! For those of you who haven't heard, the soap writers and the rest of the team have been given the green light to start re-filming again, this is due to take place some time next month. However, it does mean that EastEnders will be taken off air for a few weeks until the time will come for them to start re-filming again. This is fantastic news that we've all been waiting for, we won't have to wait much longer than expected for us to get our usual 4 episodes a week back. How long the soap will be off air still remains unknown. It also has been revealed that script-writers will include characters talking about the current pandemic. I for one, feel it's amazing news to hear that plans are in place for our favourite actors and actresses to walk through the Square again! Crew will still make sure that everyone follows the rules and for them to keep 2 meters apart and the recording/editing team will use techniques to make it look as natural as possible for the viewers.  I also realise this post is a bit late, due to me being in work again, but today I will post 2 blogs covering both last night's episode and tonight's episode.

I also have some other news for you, it has been revealed that EastEnders are planning to film an episode which will focus entirely on Ben and his hearing loss. The soap will feature subtitles and muffled audio for the audience to get the idea and/or experience what Ben is currently going through. I for one, am REALLY looking forward to seeing this episode. It will be something completely different and something that we've never seen before. I love when soaps jump in the deep end and decide to show something completely different, it was the same when Bobby kept seeing Lucy and also when Stacey went through her breakdown a couple of years ago. I just find it fascinating! I'm sure it'll be a momentous moment for EastEnders and it'll get rave feedback! Are you looking forward to seeing this episode air? The episode will be shown on Monday 1st June! I can hardly contain my excitement!

Now, let's make a start on last night's episode, a lot to cover from last night I think. Let's start with Isaac, still moping about finding out about Patrick being his biological father. Denise has done everything she can to keep him from making a mess of himself. She knows he's struggling but skipping work and making up excuses and drinking until he's nearly having a pee in front of children, is definitely not the way to be coping. All I can really say is, thank you to Bailey! What an amazing child she is! Amazing that it's taken a child to actual make a grown-up realise he hasn't really got it all that bad! Yeah, it would be a shock to him, but what Bailey said was absolutely inspirational and it really spoke truth to him. She's absolutely right in the fact that the guy who Isaac thought was his Dad, never left his side till his death. He was with him every single day and treated him like his own, now he's got another Dad to help him with his future, he could really make a go of building a relationship with Patrick if he gave him the chance. When Bailey spoke how lucky she was to have had two Mum's, I just thought it was absolutely moving, really sweet. I'm hoping now Isaac will realise he hasn't got it all that bad and he'll be able to move on, perhaps when Patrick and Sheree come back, he'll be able to ask them any questions he wants answering and maybe then, he'll feel ready to move on and accept Patrick is his Dad.

Oh Keegan! I feel like he's just not dealing with things well at the moment. I mean, did he really need to post up the video to his social media, inevitably putting Jack's job at risk! Jack told him to keep it to himself as their could be consequences, and its as if he didn't care. He was selfish and wanted to uphold his reputation. I mean, I get he wanted to prove he was innocent, but that would have happened in time and the police would've admitted their mistakes, but it's as if he can't let go after the way they treated him. I personally, feel sorry for Tiffany in all of this, she's being stuck right in the middle of it all. She's trying her best to support and understand her husband, but also her uncle put his neck on the line for her husband. What's going to happen now? Could Jack be in deep trouble with this colleagues? Will Keegan get the justice he's so desperate for? Or will he come to regret posting the video in the first place? I know it's awful to say, but I'm kinda getting a bit bored of this story-line now, I have a feeling this will change Keegan's personality completely and it may lead to further story-lines involving him fighting against the police, fighting for equality and stuff like that? I could be completely wrong, but I just have a feeling that might be the direction it'll take, who knows? I am concerned for Jack now though, is he going to lose his job now though due to Keegan's actions? Will he be able to explain himself or will he do as Keegan suggested and keep quiet? What do you think is going to happen? Do you see this story-line dying down eventually or could it take a whole new direction? Let me know what you think guys, I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Ha! She may be a bit gullible, but I do love Habiba! She brings a lot of comedy to the soap, which is what we really need right now. At first I thought she was going to get away with it and be able to get the information for Rainie! I loved the look on Ian's face when he thought she was serious about getting to know more about the business. It was only when she dropped all her papers and Ian saw her paperwork it was all going to go downhill! I just loved the fact she didn't seem to click, not even knowing what "Sweet FA" meant! God bless her! Haha! But now Ian has made Max aware of what is going on, what does it mean for Max? Will he still give Rainie the divorce she wants? Or will he be able to give her the divorce and still be able to keep the majority of his money! Even Ruby mentioned he should be careful with money, considering he wanted to take her out for a meal even though he still has a divorce to pay for. Did anyone else see the flirtation between Ruby and Martin?! Okay, let me just say ... where the heck has Martin been?! With everything happening with Jean, surely he would've been there to help Kush out ... hmm maybe now he'll start helping? Anyway, there was obvious flirtation and sexual attraction there between Martin and Ruby ... Didn't they sleep together once a while back?! And they've not mentioned it to anyone or to each other since? Now Ruby has offered him a job, could there be something on the horizon for them? And will Max start to feel jealous around them and begin to notice what's going on?!

So, due to Ben having a temperature, his operation has had to be postponed. It's a bit of shame as I feel everyone wanted him to get it done there and then, obviously Ben more than anyone! Callum was there to support his partner, after having their argument the episode beforehand, he knew he had to be there for him. It was massive blow for Ben to be told he couldn't have the operation, he just wants everything to be back to normal. But now the question is, when will he have the operation? Will it still be a success? But most importantly, will he have the operation in time before he has to do the dodgy deal with his Dad? Something is telling me, No! Even Phil was eager to know when they'd reschedule his op for, and Kathy noticed it was the exact same way that Ben reacted! Is she going to click on that something is happening between the two of them and will she find out what they're involved in?! I'm really looking forward to seeing what the future holds for Ben, the episode that's going to be completely focused on him is going to be epic! We know that Ben is still meant to come across someone who is completely deaf, a young girl named Frankie will come into the soap, will she be able to help Ben come to terms with his hearing loss? I do hope his op will be successful, but of course, we will all have to wait and see!

Ooooh poor Jean! I just want to give her a big hug and tell her everything is okay. She's found out that both Kush and Shirley were slipping her medication into her food and drink, which actually caused her to have her fit. They'd accidentally given her too much and she'd been poisoned by the vast amount they'd given her. Of course their intentions were caring and loving as they both care very deeply for Jean and can see that she's not being herself recently, they were literally trying to do their best at caring for her. It just turned out so drastically wrong. I hated the fact that Suki had to get involved, she was more bothered about her cardigan!! She is going to be so smug now knowing that Jean also has bipolar and that she was there to help and even stop the hospital from getting both Kush and Shirley in trouble. Jean owes her nothing and I hope Jean knows that! What is Suki getting out of this? I don't understand, why can't she just keep her distance from Jean and leave her alone! I feel sorry for all of them, I feel sorry for Jean, I feel sorry for Kush and Shirley. Everyone is just trying to help and poor Jean can't see that, and now she feels as if she can't trust them and has decided to throw Kush out, as well as the kids. I'm worried that her living on her own is going to cause her more problems, how will she be able to cope? I think now is the time for Stacey and Kat to come back, Jean's mental state is only going to get from bad to worse and without Kush or Shirley being there to look after her, who's going to let them know?! Maybe Kush and Shirley can keep an eye on her from a distance? Will Kush finally inform Martin about is happening? Either way, I just hope Jean will be okay, although I do fear it's only going to get worse for her before it gets better.

I hope you've all enjoyed reading, if you have anything you'd like to talk to me about regarding EastEnders, feel free to send me a message. I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions on the current story-lines. I'll be back again this evening with a second post following up tonight's episode! Thanks folks! xXx

[purplesurveys]

722

How many walls are in your bedroom? It’s your typical four-wall bedroom. What do you think about Fall Out Boy? I like their older stuff and my favorite album of theirs is Folie à Deux by a mile. Haven’t been able to keep up much with their new material, but I definitely don’t hate the stuff they’ve been putting out. Do you know where Guatemala is? I wouldn’t know where to find it on a map but I know it’s somewhere in the middle of North and South America? At least I’m pretty sure? Do you find musicians attractive? I mean being a musician isn’t necessarily a criterion for me to be attracted to someone, but sure I’ve come across good-looking musicians in the past. Do you like hard boiled eggs? They’re okay but I like soft-boiled more.

Do you know anyone named Hector? Nope. Would you move to another country for the one you love? We’ve had this conversation before and she has vehemently scolded me when I said that I honestly would, but idk that’s me. Then again, we’ve never been in that situation so I don’t really know how I’d actually act when it came to that. Do you own an instrument? We have a keyboard, but it’s for everyone’s use. I don’t own any of my own. What do you usually have for lunch? Ever since the quarantine started my family has only been having very late breakfast and dinner, so I’ve technically been skipping lunch for over a month now. But before this whole thing started my lunch would typically be whatever my mom can cook, which is pretty limited – fried chicken, sisig, and giniling with varied soups are her usuals, if I remember right. Ever had a pregnancy scare? I would have absolutely no reason to have one. What do you think about the Purple People Eater? I’ve never heard of this before. What the hell is that looool Are you pale or tan? Tan. What's the weather like right now? It’s windy, just a tad chilly, and comfortable enough during the night which I’m thankful for, but the days are excruciatingly hot. Sometimes it’ll be very humid and the air becomes too heavy and difficult to breathe in, and it usually means it will rain that night, but that’s seldom. I get headaches almost everyday now because of the rapid temperature changes, and it suuuucks because we’ve run out of Biogesic in the house. Do you like cats? No. We have such different personalities and I can tell all of the ones I’ve encountered don’t like me. But for the next few days I’ll probably have a brief soft spot for cats because my sister’s cat, Arlee, passed away last Sunday. We were never close and her tail always got bushy whenever she saw me, but it was the first time I had to deal with a pet cat dying and I was still pretty shattered by it. What's the best part about Wal*Mart? I dunno, I can’t relate. Do you think Akon is amazing or annoying? I think neither of him. I mostly don’t mind him. Do you like the buzz cigarettes give you? I’ve... never gotten a ~buzz from them before? Am I smoking wrong? Lmao. But uh idk it’s weirdly pleasurable overall, and now I’m ever so slightly disgusted with myself for even being able to say that now. Are you a practical joker? Nope, I hate pranks. Do you like pop? This is slang for soda right? No I don’t. I feel like my tongue is being cut off every time I try it out and that always ruins the whole experience for me. What are you looking forward to? Eating the box of sushi sitting beside me. Angela surprised me for my birthday and had the sushi delivered to my house :) Have you ever laughed so hard you couldn't breathe? I’m sure most of us have. What's your favorite band? This question has been everywhere recently. I like Paramore the most but just so I give a different answer for once, I also enjoy alt-J. Do you feel stupid when you spill things on yourself? My mom has conditioned me to think this way, so yes. I feel pretty stupid when I drop or spill anything. Are you excited for summer? In the current global situation? It’s hard to feel excited for anything, especially when experts have recommended closing everything down until at least August. Have you ever snuck out? No. My mom would’ve found out easily. It’s always easier to ask for permission cause she’s never said no anyway. When's the last time you were kissed? :( A month and two weeks. Would you ever eat popcorn & salsa? I’ve never tried them together; I think it’d be a weird combination plus salsa already isn’t my dip of choice anyway. Do you sleep with the television on? Nah but close. I’ll sometimes sleep with Netflx or YouTube playing on my phone, depending on what I feel like listening to before falling asleep. Would you ever want to be able to be invisible? I’ll fantasize about it sometimes, sure. What does your favorite shirt look like? Don’t have a current favorite shirt since I can’t go out anyway. What's your favorite scent? Gabie’s perfume or any freshly cooked food. Skype, Msn, Aim, or Yahoo? All of these are pretty much ancient now. What's your favorite time of the day? These days I’m really loving these hours in particular – midnight onwards. It’s nice to finally be alone considering I’m cooped up in a house with family literally all day, and it’s nice to use the alone time listening to lo-fi and answering a survey or two. Do you hate the phrase ''love ya'' when coming from a boyfriend/girlfriend? Yeah it wouldn’t sit well with me if it came from Gabie. But I say this regularly to my friends. What do you do when someone in the room has b.o.? Look away if I’m forced to be with them, or just move away altogether if I’m not talking to them directly. What movie would you like to see right now? Not really in a movie watching mood rn. I just watched Two for the Road a couple of nights ago and that’s enough for me, hahaha. How many times a day do you shower? Just once. What do you think of the name Chloe? It’s cute! It’s already common where I live so it’s not one of my top baby name choices, but I really love the name and I think this spelling in particular is cute. Do you like Hollister? When I was 14, sure. I was mostly invested in them because Louis Tomlinson of 1D’s girlfriend used to be a Hollister model HAHAHAHA. These days I largely don’t care for the brand. What's your favorite alcoholic drink? I always go for a Long Island Iced Tea whenever they have it on a menu. Do you like 80's music? Like, 0.0003% of it. Just not my decade for music. Do you have to wear glasses or have contacts? I wear glasses. I choose not to wear contacts. Do you play Halo or Gears of War? No for both. How do you feel about cleaning? I think it’s...necessary lol? I don’t really actively feel anything for it, other than it has to be done every now and then. What do you think of emo kids? I think we should leave ‘em be. Do you like the movie Grease? I don’t like musicals. Do you like singing? Only by myself or if I’m absolutely shitfaced drunk.

What's your favorite Jim Carrey movie? Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, WITHOUT A DOUBT. There's a knock at your door at 4 in the morning; what do you do? Welp, given that there’s been a recent disturbance in our village where a construction worker broke into a neighbor’s home, I’ll probably be more wary this time around and just ignore it. I’ll stay alert for a few minutes to see whether they start breaking in after being ignored or simply walk away so that I’m ready to wake up my parents and start screaming if they do the former. Do you like peaches? I hate all fruits. Ever lost a best friend? Not to death, but I’ve drifted apart from a best friend.

Ever heard of a town called Wadena? No. Only Wakanda, heh. Have you ever been to a funeral? I’ve never been to a funeral; I’ve only visited wakes. We were pretty sheltered when it came to death and I would dread the day I’d have to go to my first funeral because I don’t know if I’d be capable of processing the events. What's your favorite sport? Pro wrestling if it counts. If it doesn’t, tennis is my favorite to watch while table tennis is my favorite to play. What do you think about homeschooling? Egh the homeschooled kids where I live always turn out to be a bit weird or not very sociable, so I’m kinda biased against it. I don’t know if homeschooling in other countries can say the same, though. What do you think about French people? I don’t think anything of them. Thankful for their pain au chocolat though. Do you like your parents? Yes. They’ve worked harder than anyone I know to get to where they are now and to be able to provide as much as they have for their three kids. I respect them tremendously for that. I just wish we were more open and expressive and affectionate as a family in general; that would literally solve like 9732 of my problems. And I also wish that my mom wasn’t verbally abusive at times. What do you think about Minnesota? OMG nothing, stop. Do/did you like high school? It had its ups and downs. I’m mostly in the middle about it, like I can’t say I enjoyed it cause then that would betray the things I hated about it, and I can’t say I mostly hated it cause that would invalidate the good times. I did learn a lot though, that I can say for sure. Do you have any Asian friends? All of my friends are Asian. Is it cold where you live? Not even barely. Do you find accents attractive? No. I find most of them difficult to follow which is why I always need subtitles when I view anything foreign haha. Do you hate it when people make spelling mistakes? No, unless they act like a know-it-all but still fuck up their spelling. Would you ever let your boyfriend/girlfriend do your makeup? I would DEFINITELY let them do my makeup – she’d be the first person I would run to hahaha because I don’t know the first thing about applying makeup. Do you like to shop? Not like every week, but it is fun to fall down the rabbit hole and start grabbing clothes heh. How long are you on the computer during a 24 hour period? These days I’m not on it for long, which I’m really happy about! When the lockdown started I was really worried that I was gonna be too dependent on my laptop and never close it for the entire quarantine period, but the opposite has been happening. I really just open it in the evening when I take surveys, so that’s around 3-4 hours. Is money really that important? It is for me, and for everyone else in this third world Southeast Asian country. Have you ever broken a bone? Nope. Who is your favorite family member? My dog. What size bed do you have? Just a twin size, nothing special. Can’t wait to earn on my own and buy me a much bigger mattress. What age do you want to be married? Late 20s, if possible. I want to be ready for kids by the time I hit my 30s.   What's the last thing your wrote? A Facebook message for Gabie. What do you think of your town? It’s mostly uneventful here, but I think I prefer living in a calm city cause I suppose it would be exhausting living in a city that’s so hectic all the time. My situation also gives me a healthy balance of busy and quiet which I think has helped my wellbeing. When's the last time you played hide & go seek? Years and years and years ago. I think it was when we first moved into the house and it was still mostly empty.