#when finally forced to confront things... have you considering killing your problem?

[zetalial]

Sloth and Edward are quite alike really.

Both of them decided to join the military in order to obtain the philosopher's stone.

[cybershock24601]

My most unhinged and for the drama post canon Rookanis scenario is where Rook accidentally gets pregnant post the first night she and Luccanis spend together because they're both virgins, Rook's not on any contraceptive, and the final battle is happening pretty much right after so remembering to take the fantasy morning after pill kinda gets lost in the shuffle and it basically results in Lucanis speedrunning ditching the Crows to become the Ultimate Househusband.

The way I typically imagine post canon Rookanis going down is Rook moving in with Lucanis and her relationship with Caterina slowly worsening over months and years because while Caterina probably starts pretty neutral on Rook, she just does not vibe with Rook's personality and considering she's a paranoid old woman, does not like the influence this outsider has on her grandson or the sort of support Rook has unintentionally built up amongst the Crows during the whole, let's kill these evil elven gods fiasco. Sure Caterina named Lucanis First Talon but its pretty clear a lot of the power is supposed to remain in her guiding hand and Rook is an unknown and chaotic variable fucking with her plans.

Rook on the other hand goes in ready to do her best to build a good relationship with Caterina for Lucanis' sake but starts souring on Caterina the more she learns about Lucanis and Illario's childhoods and is like, no wonder shit went so sideways, which combined with Caterina's increasingly passive aggressive behavior, Rook is only being civil because she is not willing to cause more problems in Lucanis' already fucked up family but its not like Rook is taking Caterina's jabs without getting in a few of her own.

On top of that, despite Caterina's personal dislike of Rook, she's also pushing for Lucanis and Rook to marry and start pumping out great grandbabies to repopulate House Dellamorte. While Rook is more then willing to marry Lucanis, the more Rook learns about how Caterina raised Lucanis and Illario and just about the Crows in general, she starts getting a lot of reservations about raising any child of hers in such a fucked up environment. Meanwhile Lucanis is aggressively Not Thinking About It because while he can justify the treatment he received growing up, thinking about raising his children the way he was would probably break his brain a little because its a little hard to ignore how fucked up and traumatic your own childhood is when you have to confront how much that would fuck up and traumatize someone else.

So instead of these issues growing worse and worse over the years until they completely bubble over, Rook and Lucanis have to pretty immediately confront the realities of raising a family in the Crows and by the time the kid is 6 months old Rook has enough of a grasp of what this kids future will look like in the Crows and Lucanis has had to confront continuing the cycle of abuse he was born into and they just mutually come to the decision that they need to GTFO now.

Also maybe throw in a rival Talon trying to smother this future First Talon before they have chance to grow for a little extra drama and to force Lucanis to confront the same choice Caterina did on whether the seat of First Talon is worth sacrificing his family and the answer is obviously a resounding No.

And this is all without accounting for Spite and how he would react to Rook being pregnant because I'm sure that's probably an insane concept for a spirit or how Spite would deal with this new tiny person that's half-Lucanis and half-Rook. Not to mention whatever inevitable over dramatic reaction Illario has to becoming an uncle while trying to patch up his relationship with Lucanis after the whole 'attempting to have Lucanis killed to take the position of First Talon' thing. Lots of room for comedy here to balance out how fucked up the rest of this story is.

Anyways all this ends with Lucanis and Rook traveling around for a few years to keep the Crows off their tail because I doubt Lucanis would be able to easily leave without some reprisal before they eventually quietly settle down in the Necropolis. Which serves as great security because I like the idea of magical semi sentient locations and I don't think the Necropolis would let any Crow assassins reach its Crypt Baby or Crypt Grandbaby

[the-red-thread-that-strangles]

☠️🔻♥️ penny for your akai thoughts? 🥺

Hehe thank you for the ask, Celine

(ask meme here, musings and ramblings under the cut)

✨🚬 Akai Shuuichi🪗✨

☠️ Angry/violent headcanons

This is difficult to answer for me, but I think separating the two aspects of this category will allow me to consider both carefully. The problem is, I'm a big proponent of Akai being too numb to get angry. After all, this is the man who smiled at the guy who killed his girlfriend and called him his "beloved enemy". And while I do believe that his dramatic disney princess haircut upon hearing of Akemi's death was partly motivated by anger (and probably alcohol), I think it was mostly grief that drove him to it. Akai Shuuichi's anger, when it does exist, is cold and callous, because he knows he'll get what he wants eventually - or die trying.

If anything, I think he's the type to internalise the anger and turn it inwards. I wonder if the alcohol and cigarettes are a form of self-harm through negligence. Does he think he doesn't deserve better than this, seeing as he's just a tool of violence and death?

Now, the violence aspect is much more interesting. I think that to Akai, violence is a tool. He's not necessarily drawn to it, but he's used to it, and he wields it well. When I first started researching the psychology of people exposed to violence, I learned one very important thing: spies, policemen, soldiers, and other people exposed to violence are not fighters. Akai is not a fighter. Fighting is a ritual, usually done in social situations (to establish dominance, power, etc), with certain rules. If you are forced to fight, you have already lost the pre-confrontation stage of the altercation, the planning, the opportunity to simply crush your opponent with overwhelming force and violence.* I think that Akai excels at this step (he has to, as a sniper), and that he's capable of impressive displays of violence without blinking. It's as much a deterrent as a tool - after all, people will get the message to not try to mess with him if he crushes his opposition mercilessly. We've all spent a lot of time thinking about how Calvados and Kusuda would rather die than deal with Rye, and how the BO has kill-on-sight orders for him. I think it's because of his skill at inflicting violence. He's not cruel - leave that to Bourbon - but he's cold, merciless, and somehow, that's worse. You can't taunt him, can't reason with him. Once he's got you in his sights, you will eventually perish. That's the grim reaper for you.

And he won't even feel bad about it.

*Side note, but this made me think again about how cute the Ferris Wheel fight is, and how much Akai is indulging Rei there. He's meeting Rei where he's at, playing with the rules Rei presents without speaking, without intent to seriously harm, even dragging him back from certain death. Hell, all the while he's handicapped by his rifle case, and the enemy is coming. Akai should be way too smart to indulge like this, but he clearly is, and that's so cute.

🔻 Childhood headcanons

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, Akai Shuuichi was daddy's little boy. I'll die on the hill that he first handled a rifle at a very young age when Tsutomu took him on hunting trips.

Other than that, I like to think he used to be a quiet kid, preferring to read over talking to others. In the plant one shot, I wrote teen Akai hiding behind the branches of his willow and reading, and that visual stuck.

I like to think he smiled more, and more genuinely too. Imagining small Akai all bashful because he stayed up too late and Mary caught him reading Holmes novels under the blankets with a flashlight gives me joy. ("You're going to ruin your eyesight", she chastised, and now look where we are. Mr. 20/20 long distance sniper really showed her. Actually. I think Mary should meet Okiya with his glasses, and chastise him for finally needing them. Akai can't well refute her, because he does need them; granted, it's for disguise purposes and not to aid his vision, but she has a point. Also, moving away from the childhood hcs, old man Akai with glasses is peak 🙏 )

Also I imagine Akai not really knowing what to do with his little brother, and Shuukichi trailing after him like a little duckling. Imagining Akai reading him bedtime stories to get him to calm down is soothing my heart.

Oh and lastly, our beloved little pale grim reaper got sunburnt easily I'm sure. Now, this might not have been a problem in England due to the mostly rainy weather, but I bet there exists a photo of a young Akai who could pass as a lobster from when they visited Japan in the summer time.

❤️ Family headcanons

I'm not really sure what to say here aside from Akai clearly being a family man, even if he's not too great at showing it. He cares about his siblings and is fond of his mom, even estranged as they are, and if anybody hurts them, he retaliates at full force.

This also applies to Yumi, as Shuukichi's fiancée, and probably will also apply to whoever Masumi drags into the mess that is the Akai family. Rip Ran or Momiji or-

I think Akai has been away for so long that he doesn't really know how to interact with his family; there will probably be a bit of a reality check for Masumi at one point when she realises that the cool brother she idealised is cool, but also emotionally detached, and probably traumatized. Still, I think she simply won't leave him the option of running away again, and he's going to be the laid back and terribly enabling uncle for his nieces and nephews (of which there will be many, I am sure).

I also think that Akai and Shiho's bond should be further explored. I think Shiho benefits a lot from not being as alone as she thinks in the long run. Granted, she'll probably get along better with Masumi than Akai (a low bar to clear, I know), but she will eventually have to address the Akemi situation. And there really isn't anybody left who could mourn her, aside from the pair of them. So, as much as she doesn't like Akai, I think they should mourn Akemi together, and move on together. Also, as a bonus Crack idea I want them to go to some sort of mystery dinner together and have them crack the whole case before they're even finished with the entrees. Let them be smart together. Augh. Also Akai attending the defense of her PhD...

I think I should stop now, at this point I'm projecting XD

Thanks again for the ask ^^

[fractualized]

In "Perp Walk", what do you think Bruce means when he says Joker "made him better"?

I have a few answers to this, starting with how the comic places the dialogue over visuals that, despite the lack of Red Hood, appear to recount Joker's fall into the vat.

[Batman: the Brave and the Bold #13]

Bruce had been Batman for some time before that night. I believe it's usually a year or so? But anyway, he says that he started out thinking of himself as a symbol of fear and justice, and note that "justice" is positioned over the fall into the vat. Initially this feels like it indicates the fall is a deserved consequence, but then the next panel with Bruce pulling Joker out, says, "Joker changed all that." As in Joker made him rethink his approach of focusing on fear and justice, which puts a different light on the "justice" panel, implying that it was anything but. Joker was only fleeing from a robbery that night, after all.

As the page goes on, the panels focus the pain and horror of Joker's transformation and Bruce's reaction to it. Bruce's face first looks determined, then shifts to wide-eyed surprise, and then appears understandably disturbed by the acid eating away at Joker's face. And over this, Bruce says that Joker changed him. Certainly over the years Joker pushed Bruce to confront greater threats than he ever imagined, but with this imagery, I also take this remark to mean that Bruce had to rethink being a force only of fear and justice. Even if Joker refused to be a beneficiary of any compassion Batman offered, Bruce saw firsthand how reacting to crime only with intimidation and violence compounded the problem he was trying to address.

We can also zoom out to the meta perspective. Joker has been Bruce's primary nemesis since 1940, and a hero is only as impressive as the challenges they overcome. The Clown Prince of Crime's schemes escalate higher and higher as time goes on, and Bruce continues to deliver defeat after defeat. It's this perseverence as a nonpowered hero that's made Batman a figure of hope to so many people, and of course contributed his indelible mark on pop culture. (And yes I still say this as someone who constantly talks about how insane he is.)

Joker making Batman better has been mentioned in comics before this, of course. A recent example is Snyder's Death of the Family storyline, in which Joker insists to Batman that his human connections make him soft, and that he was a better Batman when he was a loner.

[Batman (2011) #13]

You know how you help your pal and get back to how things used to be by trying to convince him to kill his own family.

Obviously Bruce does not do that, and he protests that his family makes him better. And yet throughout this whole ordeal, Bruce has to rise above and use all his skills to stop Joker like always.

Joker pushing Batman happens again not too many years after that in Tynion's Joker War. Through elaborate machinations, Joker takes away Bruce's fortune, his main resource in fighting, incapacitates him, and unleashes anarchy, like ya do. In their final confrontation, Joker gives this speech about his reasoning:

[Batman (2016) #100]

All this talk about how Bruce doesn't even understand the city, and yet Joker's endgame here is to force Batman to start over from nothing. He expects Bruce to get back up again, to work at correcting his mistakes.

Of course, Joker ends up defeated. But in the next issue, Bruce says that in some ways, Joker was correct:

[Batman (2016) #101]

And Bruce does make some changes, such as moving from the manor to the brownstone in the city to live among the people he protects.

Now, considering the context, one may return to Bruce's appreciation in "Perp Walk" and think, "Hey, Bruce, you remember Joker killed people, right?" Yes! Welcome to batjokes.

[whumpitisthen]

here's a quick rundown on astarion: gay vampire spawn (not a vampire. like a demo version vampire. a "lesser" one but don't let him hear that) who has been kept for 200 years by his master as a slave. guy (who was an actual vampire) carved him up, tortured him and forced him to lure victims into his manor. astarion has been abused in so many ways i'd hit some sort of character limit if i listed half of them. he was only allowed to feet on rats and small vermin in the sewers. poor little meow meow astarion is now free due to [game story] reasons and seeks power and revenge -- he's an edgy fuck with a lot of swag and no moral compass. bro is a menace and loves causing problems on purpose. [slight spoiler] he will literally try to suck some of your blood like a day or two after you meet him and unless you succeed a skill check he'll just keep doing it until you die. if you resurrect yourself afterwards he'll go like "ooooh ooopsie sowwy! i wouldn't kill you if i knew you'll be back teehee can we forget about this? ;) <3 don't fucking kill me". he's such a good fucking whumpee you don't even know. it's insane. i don't want to ramble but he's almost everything i've ever wanted from a character like this in a large scale rpg. [slightly bigger spoiler] despite being the go-to "fuckable" character who everyone finds hot as hell (both in-universe and online) he's HORRIBLY traumatized by his sexual experiences from when he used to be a slave and when you romance him a good portion of his storyline revolves around trying to make him realize that he's more than just a slab of very attractive meat. he hides his feelings behind a facade of "evil tumblr sexyman-esque" mannierisms and getting to finally peel it back and see him for the poor wet cat that he is is so fucking satisfying. [an even bigger spoiler] i loved watching him cry when he finally gets to confront his former master. pristine content. there's so much more to his character (and this game in general) but if you ever need to justify spending full price on a new videogame release, there's nothing better than bg3. if i could choose one game to beam directly into the brain of each whumpblr user, it'd be this one.

Okay so i already loved him from the very little information i had about him, but this is so delicious

I saw some pics of bad scars which are always hhh and heard that he is a whumpee but i didn't know the extent and now i think ive collected a new blorbo

You are telling me he meets his old master at some point...... and he cries..... and hes all sad....... he rly was made for tumblr but especially me youre telling me he has white hair and is a vampire twink who was a slave and hurt and traumatised and he has incredible sad wet cat energy and he only has a flimsy layer of confidence and absolutely no idea what morals are. i knew i needed to know more you have to understand my knowledge of the game stopped at the bear sex scene like that is it and yet i somehow always find the most pathetic little men no matter what in any media i could not give a shit about any of the rest i will consume the entire thing just to know the exact extent of his sad little life

Also i wish i had the opportunity to even consider buying a full price new release no matter how good the game is there is no world in which id be able to pay for that. Also idk about the gameplay either it seems very story oriented roleplay and almost dating sim-ish? Not a huge fan of those in general its gotta have more gameplay than walking around and basically watching a movie, but, again. No idea about anything, maybe it has incredible gameplay and i just dont know. Dont tell me if it does itll just make ms sadder bc that would absolutely make me wanna play it myself. Its kinda funny honestly the longer i spend not knowing anything the crazier everyone seems to me both online and irl. Its like im living in a separate world, i know no one who hasn't played this fucking game fjfhskhfd

[ch0kehold-ch3rry-pyth0n]

The Spirit ask blog

So, I have made one of these before. However, it is old and I am unsatisfied with it. So I am rewriting it by myself without an annoying tiny pink ghost nagging me and talking over me.

With that said, let's try this again.

Introduction section - Get to know Spirit and her world

Hello, Tumblr. My name is Spirit Auraveil. I am a second year Ramshackle student at Night Raven College as of writing this. I don't really know what else I can say about myself. But I am a gorgon with albinism and I am very normal about the color red, as you can see from the text color I set it to. I go by she/her and I'm omni and poly.

I share a dorm with a couple other idiots. Apparently a cat possum thing is considered a student for whatever reason? But we have a Housewarden named Comet. She was the first one to be put in this dorm (along with the possum) and she nearly broke her back trying to renovate it from looking like a total dump. Ramshackle would not be the dorm it is today without her. And then there's people like Alice, Jude, Heaven, that one guy that Floyd and Jade hate for whatever reason, and whatever the fuck Andro has got going on.

We're a smaller population of students in comparison to the other 7 dorms. It's not that bad when you don't have a ghost breathing down your neck at 3AM while you're trying to make kraft Macaroni and Cheese. But we're who makes Ramshackle a home.

Except for Andro. He kinda just locks himself in his room all day. To a point where he's more of a cryptid than the actual cryptids that live here.

Anyway, what else do I put down? Oh, right. The rules. Cue the next section.

The rules - What is and isn't okay to say or do when interacting with Spirit

[Red = Spirit's text]

[Default = ooc/the creator's text]

Don't be rude unprompted. I am aware of how I come off. But that is no excuse to give me distasteful asks. I will not respond to those types of asks.

No nsfw. I may be over 18+, but I still don't look forward to publicly answering asks that are inherently sexual. That just feels weird and uncomfortable. So if you could avoid doing that, that'd be great.

Don't feel bad if I don't respond. I get burnt out pretty quickly. So I may not get to your ask right away. But I will try to get to it as soon as I can so long as it doesn't break any rules or boundaries.

Don't question my tags. I let my acquaintance, Alice, tag my posts because I usually just don't feel like doing it myself. If there's anything strange or goofy in there, chances are that is all Alice's doing.

No derogatory language! Swearing is okay, as this is an account for audiences that are teenagers and older. But we do not condone the usage of slurs of any kind. Nor do we condone any type of homophobia, transphobia, racism, ableism, or anything of the sort. If this rule offends you, then you're more of a snowflake than I am and I kindly ask you get off this page.

Don't spam. I am not online all the time and neither is Spirit. I may occasionally go into long hiatuses, mainly due to me forgetting that I have this account at all. But still, please don't spam. That is honestly just a hassle for me more than anything.

No god modding. As in do not attempt to control my character, force things that I did not agree on, try to majorly hurt or kill my character without consulting in me first, or anything of the sort. It ruins the fun when things are forced!

Other character and oc interactions are welcome! I am happy to roleplay and interact with other rp blogs and accounts. I aim to build some kind of storyline with this ask blog. And I appreciate when others add onto that!

Try to remember that this is all lighthearted. I deeply apologize if I come off as uninterested or cold. It's just how my neutral expression and voice is. And I mean you no ill will. Although I appreciate honesty in terms of confronting me when I make you upset. Gives me more room to try and fix the problem at hand.

Conclusion - final statement from Spirit

Anyway, that is just about it. I hope that we can get along nicely. Do take care of yourself.

I'll see you all in my next post. Later.

(Check out my other accounts: @aetherphobia @enigmacitrus-rp)

(For more info on this character and what she is like, I refer you to this post from my main account!)

[cavemanyaxye]

Part 1

What is the danger of a single story according to Chimamande Adichie?

The danger of a single story makes people think in a way that is flawed and isn't true. This one sided storytelling can make ideas on a story based on one description not the other side. Showing people as one thing over and over again till it sticks to that one story.

Discuss how what she calls “nkali” is part of the danger. What is the truth and problem of stereotypes in her words?

It's part of the danger by illustrating how power is given in storys with bad by giving power to one stereotype. The truth and problem in her writing is that storys matter and how they are portrayed is important to the truth and the problem of stereotypes is that it gives power to misinformation and bias and that can lead to people believing that people aren't on par with them.

What’s the most important idea you’ll take with you from this talk?

The important idea I will take from this is that storys matter and what one person says with bias isn't always the truth and new outlets portray the worst and the problems not the good.

Part 2

Compare and contrast the two lives featured in the short story.

The two lives John lived is a double conscious of one being black and another being white it’s shows a lot about how living with his black town and the difference between living in a white town

• Why do you think W.E.B. DuBois chose to write this as a fictional story rather than drawing upon a real life example?

Dubois chose the fictional story route because the fiction allows him to have greater freedom to explore the story of an black man during Jim Crow laws around it also allows him to create characters and scenarios that can show broader truths and audiences. Fiction has a better way of giving an emotional impact helping to connect with black African struggles and see it through a len.

• Discuss the role of education in the life of John Jones particularly. How does his education change how he sees his society and how he sees himself? Do you think that education, beyond preparing a student for a future career, can also change a person?

The role of education has changed his life with his education allowing him to see injustice and inequality with clarity within society. This reality forces him to confront that reality and learn to gain more knowledge to gain worth within himself and potential. I believe that education beyond preparing for a career can change a person with new knowledge comes a greater understanding of many things and transforms people to new persons.

• On a personal level, what connection do you draw between Chimamanda Achidie’s Ted Talk and the story told here?

The story and Achidie ted talk made connections to untapped stories and seeing one side that’s unfair but to live in an unjust world doesn’t mean you have to live by it. Also the connection to how being educated is key to a solution was important in this story.

• For your final response, choose ONE of the following options: Either, 1) Research and find out more about life during Jim Crow in the South (before the Civil Rights movement in the 1960s). Describe the particular troubles that African Americans faced in this time—OR—2) Consider what has changed in America since over a hundred years have passed since this story’s publication. Find the story of one person of color who was killed unjustly, either by police or by other forces in the community. Using research, discover their story and tell us what you find out.

A black man named Marcellus Williams 55 years old, was convicted in 1998 for the killing of Lisha Galye during the burglary of her St. Louis home. While she was in the shower “Marcellus” came into the home and grabbed a kitchen knife and when she went downstairs he stabbed her 43 times and made off with her husband's laptop and her purse. Authorities said he stole a jacket too to had the blood splatter on his shirt. His girlfriend wondered why he was wearing a jacket in hot weather; she later saw a purse and a computer that he “sold” a couple days later in his car. Prosecutors also cited testimony from Henry Cole who was his cell mate that he confessed to the murders but he and his girlfriend are both felons and Most likely want the 10,000 reward said by Marcellus' attorney. They said fingerprints, a bloody shoe print, hair and other evidence at the crime scene didn’t match Williams’. A crime scene investigator had testified that the killer wore gloves. Questions about the DNA evidence led St. Louis prosecutor Wesley Bell requested a hearing challenging William's guilt but days before the hearing new DNA was found on the knife belonging to members of the prosecutor office how handled it without gloves after the original crime lab tests. Without any dna that gave an alternative suspect. Williams attorney who’s black challenged the fairness of the jury white only one of the 12 jurors being black and that prosecutor Keith Larner removed 6 of the 7 black prospective jurors. The fairness of the verdict shows a lot of holes in the treatment of William that was put to the death penalty. I understand that people who murder others aren't all great and some deserve it but if someone could be innocent in the slight it should be looked into instead of pushed for guilt especially in how flawed some process of justice is done is horrible.

[imadethisaccountforaheadcannon]

I hate tsams

It makes me so depressed before moon got revived I was ready to conclude that it and all the shows integrately intertwined with it was just shit all the characters in it even new moon and Earth were bad people

(I say it's an evil AU but I only have offence with the shows with the characters originating from tsams just saying)

After a while of hearing that moon was back I kept wondering if they were going to acknowledge how bad sun had treated him this time nope

More him being forced to take the majority of accountability and Immidiately being manipulated into "making up up" to people that didn't even check if he was alive and being brainwashed into thinking that him and all the moons are deserving of mistreatment I changed my opinion on nexus cause how he turned out was mostly suns fault for he Immidiately painted Moon as the bad one

Moon doesn't go for more info in regards to the BM simulation and word of mouth and was clearly influenced by sun Immidiately going to killdrop to kill drop himself I suspect he would nlt have killed drop if sun didn't act so malicious to him.

All of this is generally indicative that sun is going out of his way to turn moons against eachother which I just typical all moon did to sun in his killcoded state is criticise him

Sun has literally been milking how "bad" moon treated him for sympathy points and he has allways showed a lack of regard for moon.

Sun allso showed such a judgemental attitude to moon working for the Mafia sun you know you two don't have rights you literally used moons tech to get out of being transferred as well as most other times even after he was dead STFU

These are some of the things sun did when he got back and nobody cares he's doing them

None of them showed any indication they cared about moons feelings to busy being convinced they haven't been using him as a scapegoat all this time and then they just expect him to just run to them after he gets attacked by nexus

They act like they didn't go along with sun playing the victim for profit for a year when moon was literally dead and now they just expect him to get comfort from the system the built up from his hurt.

They expect him to go to one of the bots they replaced him with and not have a truama response towards her

I hate her for that exact reason and I absolutely have a truama response towards her existence imagine how bad it is for moon when he has such a hard time making friends in the firstplace

I gave this show a chance cause I was so sure they would actually address that moon has literally been treated horribly the entire show.

Nope his so called "therapy " is him saying the false bull that the fandoms being saying about him this entire time

They ignore all the various times he has talked it out went ""Oh look moons talking it out for the first time,, and then they make him go ""this is the firstime I've felt this good,, Oh so sun's truama gets a whole year of justifying him doing evil stuff but moons gets depicted as solvable with one convo.

So apparently your supposed to think he's "better now" like how the fuck don't most people think moon has gone completely insane like not all insanity manifests the same way some people like moon manifests their insanity via a ridiculous level of compliance

The final straw was when after nexus died and moon got kidnapped moons "family" Immidiately showed 0 consideration for the fact that moon experienced bad things as well then Monty and lunar immediately tried to shove him on Earth and then complained about moon always avoiding confronting his problems

Like ever consider he wanted to talk about his problems with one of you fools

This show by the literal definition became actually cringe to me when they went and implied moon the animatronic that I largely believe has stalkholm syndrome has never cared for sun before

When sun has never actually comforted moon on the same level moon has comforted him

So moons just expected to be enslaved to sun's emotional needs fuck this

Oh yeah and I nearly forgot how little goliath coming in the daycare and hitting moon earlier is depicted as actually mattering goliath could have killed him but oh no it's not important

Him hitting a Victim of reactive abuse is depicted as less Important then him trying to kidnap the one who did said reactive abuse

I'm really hoping that goliath was complimenting sun on him being a psycho

[tangent101]

Ah. But consider this: Max travels at time at the very start of the game. She wakes up on the top of the cliffs, just about. She heads toward the lighthouse... and is killed. But at the instance of her death she instead Rewinds five days, the stress of the Rewind blanking her of just about all memory except for the Storm itself.

The "dream" of the Storm was so intense that Max was just... thrown for a loop through the rest of Jefferson's class. It's only when Chloe is drawn into the bathroom and dies that she "wakes up" and that's when Rewind #2 hits.

So then. The core reality is this: Max Caulfield dies. In the instance of her death, she goes back in time five days remembering just the Storm. In fact, the stress of going back in time is so intense that she forgets people and places until she sees them again - because the player is a blank slate, so too is the character. She has journal entries on them to help "teach" the players about what Max knows... and if the players don't read the journal then Max doesn't know those details found in the journal.

To explain this further... Max Caulfield had been going to tea with Kate for a month. This is likely something that started quite early in the school year, so we most likely have around four tea dates that Max goes on with Kate. Would Max Caulfield never ask any questions about Kate's family? Why does she only learn about Kate's father and sisters if she looks at photos of them? Or has the stress of time travel caused Max to forget most details and these details only gradually come back as Max witnesses things and talks to folks?

Next, Chloe never dies in the core timeline. The Max we see at that point is in street clothes, not funeral attire. The Powers That Be that gave Max the Rewind also made sure to have Chloe go into the bathroom to confront Nathan. (Maybe originally Chloe chickened out or got there slightly sooner and saw the bulge of a gun, or even got caught by David.) So the PTB essentially forces the situation - Chloe dies but is "saved" by Max "abusing" her power (despite the fact that Max didn't know she couldn't save anyone's life and despite the fact that Max didn't know she was saving Chloe, she was saving a random stranger's life and that stranger happened to be Chloe). Thus either Chloe dies or the town dies. And it's all. Max's. Fault.

Ethically, there's only one thing to do with the Trolley Car Problem: don't pull the lever. Because I am willing to bet I could manipulate the problem so you don't pull the lever which means that the choice to save lives is conditional and thus societal.

Let's put it this way. Let's say Nathan had raped Chloe Price. She knew she was pregnant. She knew that the rape was the only man she's been with (maybe forever - perhaps Chloe knew she was a lesbian from a young age and Joyce just "assumed" she was with "bad boys" because she didn't accept her daughter as gay). But be it as it may... Chloe Price is a pregnant woman. Is it ethical to "pull the lever" to kill Chloe and an innocent unborn child?

What if instead of Rachel Amber, it was Richard Amber, a polite young bisexual man from a rich family, and Nathan or Mark Jefferson murdered him instead... and Chloe is six months pregnant and has been seeking Richard who she knows wouldn't abandon her. Is it ethical now to sacrifice Chloe to save Arcadia Bay?

What if the only people in Arcadia Bay were Mark Jefferson, Nathan Prescott, Sean Prescott, Principal Wells, and Frank Bowers (without his dog) and saving Chloe and her baby only resulted in those deaths? I mean... five bad people dying instead of a pregnant woman.

You notice how the slope becomes quite slippery. Soon it becomes a choice of letting people you dislike die by your inaction rather than a pregnant woman, or even any one person on the other set of tracks.

Finally, there is one other aspect of the story that makes no sense... which is when Max went back in time to 2008 and saved William, she still had time travel abilities. So then, her Rewind exists despite not having witnessed Chloe's death. How then does letting her die prevent Max from getting time travel powers? That's the whole reason to let Chloe die - to keep Max from getting the Rewind and thus cause the Storm. The only way to keep Max from getting the Rewind is for Max to sacrifice herself. She pauses time, puts herself between Chloe and the gun, and then is shot dead instead of Chloe.

If Chloe's death prevents the Storm (and we are shown it prevents the Storm) that means this was a blood sacrifice to appease a jealous God who was so petty as to force Max to murder her best friend to prevent the deaths of a bunch of innocent people that this jealous God put in peril merely to punish Max for doing a good deed. Sacrifice Chloe in essence is the message of: my actions are futile and ultimately I am better off not acting at all lest my actions cause death and destruction.

I choose life and action. If all I can save is Chloe? So be it.

I hate endings like “ooohh they time traveled and made it so nothing ever happened!” with a burning passion and my only exception is Life is Strange. LIS is the only time I’ve seen it done in a way that makes sense and was a satisfying way to wrap up the story. The storm never would’ve happened if Max didn’t try to change time, so her going back one last time to stop herself didn’t feel like a cop out at all. I know most people choose Chloe over Arcadia, but I think both endings are done well.

[soulmate-game]

Daughter of wonderwoman au where marinette finds out her mother is actually Diana and somehow it ends up with her meeting/being introduced to the batfam maybe because she has super strength and is seen yeeting some bad guys who tried to mug her... Or something.

“... you are running from your problems, Mari,” Adrien’s exasperated voice reminded his best friend. Again. She ignored him, and he threw his hands up in exasperation. “Look, you don’t have to do anything about it! Nobody would hold it against you if you decided to just, ignore that you found anything out at all. But you need to actually think about what we just found out and decide whether or not you’re gonna do anything—“ he side-stepped a piece of trash that went flying in his direction. “—or if you’re gonna move on and pretend nothing happened.”

“Isn’t that what I’m doing?” Marinette shot back, pushing her bangs out of her face and tying her hair back with one hand.

“No, you’re currently hiding away in Gotham to avoid your parents while you beat up every random group of idiots who thinks you’re an easy mark,” he retorted. Another wannabe kidnapper went flying in his direction, making him sigh and side step again. She had thrown that one with only her one free hand, showing just how upset she was. “You’re ignoring everything in your life, which is not what we meant we said you should get a little space.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Marinette dropkicked the last criminal into unconsciousness before stepping back and putting her hands on her hips. She looked over at the now seven passed out men in the alleyway, and the one very frustrated ex-model pinching the bride of his nose. “I think I’m coping just fine.”

“It’s better than being forced to suppress all of your emotions, sure,” Adrien reluctantly agreed. “But not by much. Your angry rampage through Gotham has already attracted more attention,” he raised his hand to point at a nearby rooftop. Several shadows lurked there, looming over the building’s edge. “Which, might I add, is exactly why I told you not to come to Gotham.”

“You’re the one who followed me here,” she shot back before turning to the shadowy figures above them. “Go ahead and come down! But it was self defense, and you can’t arrest or beat me up for defending myself!”

The first figure to drop down straightened your just as quickly, revealing the imposing figure of none other than Batman himself. The little white eyes on his cowl seemed to narrow on their own as he looked down at her.

“That might be true, but I’m sure you know my policy on metas in my city,” he grumbled back at her. He wasn’t necessarily threatening, but he definitely wasn’t welcoming either. With all of his limbs hidden behind the cocoon that was his cape, Marinette would never be able to predict his next move if he did decide to fight. Not that she seemed particularly worried about that as she crossed her arms over her chest and met his glare evenly.

“Oh, do you own this city now? I wasn’t given the memo,” she retorted. “And considering I didn’t even know I was a meta until last week? I think I deserve a little slack. I’m angry and if people think the tiny little girl in pink is an easy kidnapping target, then it’s their fault for making themselves into the perfect practice dummies for me to try out my newly discovered strength on.”

Adrien saw the eyes on Batman’s mask narrow even further. Marinette wasn’t exactly at her most charismatic at the moment, and Adrien didn’t wanna get the both of them into a bad relationship with the experienced superhero who always seemed to know things he shouldn’t know. So he stepped up quickly, getting in between Marinette and the Bat and holding his hands up in a placating gesture.

“Okay, Monsieur Batman,” Adrien started slowly, making sure his posture was impeccable and his smile bright. “She’s telling the truth, even if she’s not... the most tactful about it right now. She just found out some very concerning things about her origin and Gotham is the best place for her to hide from her problems and let loose a little pent up aggression. But— well,” he grimaced. “We didn’t intend to run into you guys, but maybe it’s a good thing we did.”

“How so?” Batman was clearly still incredibly suspicious of the both of them and wasn’t giving an inch. So Marinette rolled her eyes (she was still very moody) and leaned around Adrien so she could get a good look at the monochromatic hero.

“I thank my lucky spots that we ran into you, Batman!” She said monotonously. “Me and Adrien are paw-sitively excited at this opportunity.”

Batman. Froze.

Not only were those two lines the very first lines ever spoken to him by two foreign heroes a few years ago (with a few key words changed to protect identities), but they had become their code phrase for whenever they made calls to one another outside of their costumes. All at once it seemed to hit him— the golden hair and bright green eyes on the boy, the blue-black hair and normally super-focused bluebell eyes on the girl that were currently sporting very uncharacteristic frustration. Their heights. Their builds. All of this info flowed through his mind and compared to the information stored in his memory, and it only took the span of two seconds for everything to click.

Suddenly Batman was at full attention, back straight instead of looming over them and eyebrows clearly raised high under his cowl.

He knew Chat Noir and Ladybug would never take a random vacation to Gotham. Ladybug herself had nearly waxed poetic about how much the city depressed her just from the pictures she saw online. If she had willingly come to visit, it was more than to just blow off some steam.

“Batcave?” He asked, earning a relieved look from Adrien and a moody silence from Marinette.

“Please,” Adrien agreed. “You can probably help us, actually.”

—*—*—*—*—*

Marinette leaned back in the metal debriefing chair, legs up on the table and looking for all the world as the picture of pure teenage rebellion and angst. Coincidentally, Red Hood was in the exact same position in the chair next to her.

Batman and all of his other bats and birds were in the cave with the two off-duty Parisian heroes. Everyone except Adrien and Marinette still had their masks on, since the two Parisians were still not privy to their identities. Yet.

To be fair, the bats hadn’t known the identities of the two miraculous users either before today.

“Cha Noir,” Batman started, only to get a head shake from the blond boy.

“Just call me Adrien. Chat’s out of the bag—“ he ignored the groans at the pun and soldiered on, “—so might as well use my real name.”

Batman nodded. “Adrien, then,” he amended. “Why are you and Ladybug really in Gotham?”

Adrien sighed. “I wasn’t lying, before. Marinette,” he gestured to his hero partner. “Just found out some distressing family news. Since HawkMoth is gone, she doesn’t need to repress her negative emotions anymore. But she also didn’t want to be around her parents while she processed everything. I told her to choose any other city— really, I begged— but she insisted on coming to Gotham.”

“The never ending cloud cover and constant rain seem thematic,” she finally spoke up, reaching into her big over-the-shoulder bag and pulling out a large envelope. She threw it to Batman, making the thin package slice through the air like a knife. To nobody’s surprise the seasoned hero easily caught the projectile between two fingers. He looked at the envelope and back to Marinette, silent questions floating in the air between them. Marinette decided to answer at her own pace.

“That’s what we found out. You see, one of my friends is a huge science nerd. A genius. And he wanted to compare DNA samples between us to see if there were any genetic components that determined a person’s suitability towards certain Miraculous or other magical artifacts over others. It was supposed to just be a fun side project that he didn’t expect any breakthroughs on. He mostly just wanted to satisfy his own curiosity. But instead of finding out if our DNA was linked to the miraculous, he found out that my parents are not biologically my parents.”

“Hence the whole just finding out that you’re a meta thing, right?” Nightwing spoke up, fully invested in the story. “Did they never say you were adopted before?”

“It’s not in the system,” she replied easily. “My parents have all the documentation to prove that I’m their biological child, except I’m not. When I confronted them about it, they caved and admitted that they had adopted me in secret and covered it up. Apparently a friend of theirs was involved in something illegal, and,” she waved at the envelope that Batman was now opening. “The details of what we were able to dig up are in there. The summary is this; their friend was part of a secret, illegal experimentation to create clones that could defeat the Justice League—“ the air seemed to get sucked out of the room as soon as those words left Marinette’s mouth. Everyone seemed to know exactly what she was talking about. “—a group called CADMUS. They made me, as apparently one of their early attempts. But I didn’t exhibit any of the powers they were looking for, or any meta traits at all, and my body refused to mature at the rate they wanted. They had no use for a seemingly normal human baby that they managed to clone, so they were preparing to kill me and start over. That’s when my parent’s friend stole me, not wanting to kill an infant, and begged my parents to take me in and pretend I was theirs. Low and behold, it turns out that my DNA just needed a very specific series of emotions to unlock it’s latent abilities.”

“Those emotions being..?” Red hood trailed off, earning a wolfish smile from Marinette.

“Intense anger, betrayal, and confused frustration closely followed by the desire to punch other people’s faces in.”

“That last one is just an assumption,” Adrien chimed in. “And maybe not accurate. But the first three, our scientist friend was able to confirm. The rapid experience of a lot of negative but action-oriented emotions released whatever had been holding back the powers in her DNA from expressing themselves,” he had switched to French so that he could explain everything exactly as Max had told it to them, but he knew all of them were fluent anyway so it was fine. They nodded along, processing the information.

The crinkling of paper drew everyone’s attention back to Batman, who had been flipping through the detailed break down of everything they had found about Marinette’s situation and how she was made by CADMUS.

“Uh,” Red Robin nervously spoke up. “What’s up, Batman?”

“Your genetic donors...” Batman breathed, getting a wink and finger guns from Marinette.

“Yup. Isn’t that just the most fucked up thing you’ve ever seen? They were clearly trying to make someone who could destroy the world.”

“That makes me nervous,” Nightwing admitted, getting up and going to get a look at the papers himself. “It can’t be that ba—“

When even Nightwing was left agape, everyone else who wasn’t in on it found themselves squirming.

“Just tell the rest of us, already!” Robin demanded after the silence stretched just a bit too long.

“The unknowing genetic donors that CADMUS used to make me,” Marinette spoke up, still with her legs up on the table. “Are a very mad-scientist’s-wet-dream combination of Lex Luthor, Bruce Wayne, and Wonder Woman.”

“We don’t even know why they added Bruce Wayne’s DNA,” Adrien admitted. “Although our scientist friend thinks it’s because of physique. His hypothesis is that, in order to support the genes of Wonder Woman, they had to add male genetics that could support the production of a very high muscle mass and would lean towards easy development of a very athletic body. Lex might be evil-scientist smart, but he’s a string bean. But if he added the DNA of another multi millionaire who just so happens to maintain a ridiculously fit body without putting any obvious work into it,” Adrien shrugged. “Then maybe the clone would be able to support Wonder Woman’s genetics and that of two human donors without falling apart.”

“So I’m ‘the clone’ now, huh?” Marinette snarked, earning an exasperated eye roll from her friend.

Batman just stared at the both of them for a moment. He walked away without a word, and came back with a fresh needle and a box. He placed it on the debriefing table.

“Can I do a paternity test myself?” He asked, his voice suspiciously less gruff than normal. “I trust the both of you, but I rather be safe than sorry with something like this.”

The both of them just stared at him in confusion. They traded a glance, and finally Marinette shrugged and moved to sit in her chair properly. Her shirt was already short sleeved, so she just held her arm out so Batman could easily get a blood sample.

“Sure, why not. But do you just have Lex Luthor or Bruce Wayne’s DNA sitting around to compare, or—“ she shut up when she watched Batman take off his glove and roll his own sleeve up. Realization slowly sunk in as he asked Nightwing to take a blood sample from him.

“Holy shit,” she breathed, eyes wide. “You’re— and Luthor doesn’t know— holy shit this is even worse than I thought,” Marinette rambled, not even noticing as Red Hood moved forward and took a small blood sample from her.

Adrien put a hand over his face and just laughed for a moment hysterically. “Oh my god,” he looked over at Marinette. “You could take over the world.”

“I have the blood of Batman AND Wonder Woman on MY side,” Marinette joked back, also hysterical.

When the bat’s high tech equipment was able to come back with a positive result only a few minutes later, Marinette and Adrien had to sit on the floor and just let it all sink in. Which Batman did not at all help by immediately unmasking himself and trying to make a proper introduction.

“I wanna go beat up random thugs again,” Marinette whined, pulling at her hair. “I’ll put on a mask, whatever, but just please let me punch people. I need to punch people right now.”

[dreamologisth2o]

Why I Believe Endersmile Is Canon

Because I’m on a bit of an Endersmile binge--

This is all gonna be very messy and just me putting my thoughts together and I’ll probably not be going through the VODs for exact timestamps or anything because that’s exhausting and I applaud the people who do, but here are my thoughts on Endersmile and why I’m 100% convinced it’s canon. They’re besties your honor.

/rp Any names mentioned are referring to their dsmp characters and not the streamers themselves unless specified

First off: The Disc. Dream trusts Ranboo, a lot. He trusts him so much that he literally gave Ranboo one of the two discs he needed to pull off his big plan at the finale. He trusted Ranboo, so much that Ranboo deciding to give the disc back to Tommy or Tubbo wasn’t an option, even though Ranboo was friends with both, which he knew. I don’t know why he gave Ranboo the disc, or how he got the disc from Skeppy in the first place, and I’m sure he did have a hundred and one back up plans for if Ranboo did decide to give Tommy the disc, but asking Ranboo to hold onto the disc in the first place means Dream trusted him to a degree, and that’s big coming from Mr. “Reserved”.

Second: Knowing Dream’s Voice. Ranboo knows/remembers Dream’s voice well enough that he hears it whenever he’s in the panic room, that his subconscious uses Dream’s voice to force Ranboo to confront his fears. For a guy who hasn’t had any one on one time or conversations with Dream in VC on stream, he sure does a really good job imagining his voice. /s 

Basically, they must have spoken, a lot. They must have spent time together outside planning for things or exchanging items or whatever. So much time, in fact, that Dream and Ranboo both end up sharing the same ideology of “People not sides” of “One big happy family” of “Being the person that stops conflicts” of “Being on all sides” of “Mediating between those sides” of “Choosing the side they think is right”. 

During Ranboo’s prison visit dream/nightmare, the Voice tells Ranboo that the only reason Ranboo hasn’t been hearing it lately, is because he hasn’t been speaking with Dream as often. That Ranboo and Dream had talked with each other nearly everyday. And I’m inclined to believe that because the mere existence of the voice proves he’s heard Dream’s voice a lot, or he has a very good memory of Dream’s voice, which, considering his memory problems probably isn’t the case. This is further supported by how ever since Dream’s been in prison, ever since Ranboo banned himself from the prison, he hasn’t heard even a hint of Dream’s voice, not even as he’s remembering more and more.

Third: The Disc War Finale. During the disc war finale, we have in universe proof and out of character confirmation from both cc!Dream and cc!Ranboo that the characters had been staring at each other during the entire thing. Some friends on a discord server have also pointed out how Ranboo appeared to be avoiding Tommy’s gaze unless Tommy’s distracted. And during the entire thing Ranboo’s the only one not holding out a weapon, instead he’s got a book and quill in his hand. We’ve now also got confirmation that Ranboo was Enderwalking during the Disc War Finale, which makes all the strange behaviors make sense because if they’re friends, if they’re allies, then Ranboo didn’t show up to fight Dream. Then Dream might’ve been trying to convey something to Ranboo, like perhaps trying to keep Ranboo from doing something stupid and revealing their alliance. Especially if he planned on being put in Pandora, he really doesn’t need his friend to try and “save” him and ruin the whole plan.

Fourth: The Voice. I am inclined to believe the things the voice says. Why? Because everything the voice is talking about are all the things Ranboo doesn’t want to confront, doesn’t want to see, doesn’t want to remember. The voice isn’t malicious. It’s not even Dream, it’s just using Dream’s voice to make Ranboo listen. And Ranboo knows it’s just himself. (also out of character confirmation from the cc!s that the voice is NOT Dream and never has been, it’s just a manifestation of all the shit Ranboo’s repressed coming up and slapping him in the face) Everything the voice does, all the things it says, is trying to get Ranboo to remember the “bad” things he’s done, to remember that he was on Dream’s side. To force him to face that side of himself that might be capable of doing bad things, if there’s a good enough reason. It exaggerates things, it makes them out to be worse than they actually are, but that’s how it’s able to get Ranboo’s attention, that’s how it’s able to force him to think about those things. Ranboo won’t do anything until he’s forced to face the problem, the Voice is just trying to get Ranboo to do that.

This is why I believe Ranboo DID blow up the community house. Why he’s working with or has worked for Dream in the past. Why he willingly gave Dream his memory book, possibly to create a visible conflict between them and ensure no one would connect them as allies, like what Dream wanted to do with Punz. And also because the other things it’s said, such as Ranboo being given the Cat disc to hold onto, have been proven to be true. Nothing the Voice has said has been confirmed a lie. And many of the things it’s talked about aren’t things we or Ranboo can find the answer to unless he talks to Dream, which is until the dude’s rescued from the prison, isn’t happening. (cc!Dream where’s your Dream lore?!?!?!)

That said, if Ranboo was the one to blow up the community house, then Dream was covering for him during the Disc War Finale. He didn’t have to. He could’ve thrown Ranboo under the bus. But he chose to take on that blame, make himself look even worse in the eyes of everyone gathered there while he was at their mercy, to protect Ranboo from similar persecution. Doesn’t this remind you of anything? And Ranboo’s got a track record of making friends with those who help him.

Fifth: The Visits. Ranboo has visited Dream in prison multiple times. At the very least at least 2 times that we have direct confirmation of, and probably even more. His visits are consistent enough that just a few days after Ranboo bans himself from the prison, Dream notices and starts a strike, tells Sapnap that Ranboo’s stopped visiting, asks him, his best friend who literally threatened to perma-kill him if he were to ever leave his horrible situation, to send a message to Ranboo. (which, I guess Dream still kinda trusts Sapnap despite everything that’s happened, huh?) 

Why would Ranboo visit? Unless they’re friends, unless they’re allies? Because even Dream’s so called best friend only ever visited once. Even Bad who Dream claims to have been the nicest only ever visited once. And while Tommy and Quackity visited more than once, their multiple visits have very clear reasons behind them, while Ranboo’s just, don’t. 

And consider: How did Ranboo know about the things that were said during the Disc War Finale, word for word, line for line, that he wasn’t present for, unless someone’s told him? Unless he heard about it from Dream himself. Unless that was what they were talking about. Unless that’s part of the reason Ranboo kept visiting Dream. 

Sixth: The Lessons. I don’t know about you, but giving life lessons to someone sounds like something you’d do with a friend, and not just a “puppet”. The whole lessons book gives off really mentor mentee vibes, and considering how Ranboo’s following in Dream’s goal of stopping conflict and uniting the server, well. And the lessons aren’t even malicious, or designed to push Ranboo away from others. In fact, many of them, especially the last few ones we see, are designed to protect Ranboo! Unless Ranboo’s safety was a top priority for Dream, there’s not much reason to pass those lessons down. This lines up incredibly well with Dream taking the blame of the community house’s destruction during the Disc War Finale, as well as his protective streak at his own expense when it comes to his allies and the people he cares about. Which means Ranboo is someone he cares about, which means they’re friends! They’re besties your honor!

Seventh: Ranboo’s Vehement Denial. Ranboo is infamous for being an unreliable narrator, for being in incredible denial despite all evidence supporting otherwise. Which means his vehement denial that Dream can be anything but bad is a fairly obvious red flag that that’s not true, and that Ranboo has reason to believe it’s not true, but chooses to actively ignore or forget those reasons and attempts to reinforce the “everything’s Dream’s fault, he can never change and will always be bad” mentality, that sounds like something he stole from Tommy or c!Dream antis, because he doesn’t want to face the fact that he has reasons for believing the opposite. At this point, I am 100% on board with the idea that all these unprompted instances of Dream hate is just a blatant cover up of how that’s not true at all. (Which he touches on, ever so briefly, when he renovates the second stronghold room)

Aaaaand that’s it! For the most part. I could touch on how Enderboo is hoarding all the backbone in this relationship and that the dynamic between Enderboo and Ranboo is closer to that of someone waking up after a sugar high or going for three days straight without sleep than it is two completely separate people or someone who’s literally sleepwalking (and that “Enderboo” is his normal state and “Ranboo” is the sleep deprived not thinking straight state). But this post is already obscenely long and I should end it here. 

TL;DR: They’re besties, your honor.

Anyways, if you got this far, thanks for reading!

[animeyanderelover]

I also wanted to ask... I really liked the ‘other world reader’ head cannons that you did and I was hoping if you could do the same with the chimera ant (Meruem and his royal guards)

Again other world reader? Wow, this really is a trend.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, obsessiveness, possessiveness, delusional thoughts, isolating, locking away, killing, threatening

Other world s/o

🐈🎻💥👑All of them actually sensed you even before you were really there, feeling suddenly this incredible explosion of mysterious power, the sky suddenly changing color. And the royal guards instantly were ready to protect their king. But as weird as it sounded, they also felt a bit scared. They had never felt such power before, not to mention that whatever this was, it definitely wasn’t Nen. What was this power?

🐈🎻💥👑But as fast as the sky had changed it’s color and had set this unknown force free, just as fast it all disappeared in the blink of an eye, everything suddenly turning back to normal. With one small thing, Pitou seeing and sensing it first. They had seen everything very clear, their senses being higher than Shaiapouf’s or Youpi’s. They had seen that the sky had spit something out, falling right into their En. Apparently a human, falling right to the face of the earth. And the royal guards just watched, on still high alert. But it didn’t look like the human was conscious, Pouf already considering the problem as solved. They would be dead meat the moment they would hit the ground. They would just bring the corpse to the king.

🐈🎻💥👑That’s what they had thought. But the human didn’t die. Because seconds before they could smash the ground, they suddenly slowed down a bit, still falling pretty hard, but not enough to die. Bringing the royal guards back to being on alarm. Was this a Nen ability? It wasn’t, Pitou obviously would have sensed it that this hadn’t been Nen. What was it then? Some sort of technology you had used? Humans couldn’t fly. But now that Pitou took a closer look they discovered something interesting. You somehow felt different. It was hard to describe, you didn’t have any Nen or something like this, but the feeling you gave off. It felt...different from other humans they had encountered so far.

🐈🎻💥👑Their king obviously wanted to know what was going on, being pretty impatient about what had just happened and what this energy had been all about, demanding an explanation. And the royal guards explained everything, including the human that had fallen from the sky and magically slowed down, Shaiapouf instantly telling his majesty that they would take care of the new threat, killing it as long as it remained unconscious. And that was where the king disagreed, having sensed that whatever this energy had been, it hadn’t been Nen. Not only that, but Pitou’s explanation that this human had felt somehow different had awakened his curiosity. He wanted it alive, at least until he had found out what he had wanted to know. Shaiapouf obviously disagreed with this, begging his king to just let him kill this human. Komogi was already a big obstacle for him. Another human was the last thing he wants his emperor to get in contact with. But Meruem’s word was final, ordering Neferpitou to bring him the human.

🐈🎻💥👑Meruem, Shaiapouf and Menthuthuyoupi returned to the throne room, waiting for Pitou’s arrival which didn’t take too long. Only minutes later Pitou returned, looking quite satisfied, the human being thrown over their shoulders. And without much care they threw you done, explaining that they had been so kind to wake you up and that you had rambled some weird stuff about why you had suddenly fallen into this “Anime”, also saying whilst looking with a spark of worry yet curiosity that you had apparently known all their names. And this wasn’t good, at least in Pouf’s opinion. You had known them without him even ever realizing this threat?! Shame on him!! What kind of royal guard was he?! Meruem on the other hand was more interested in how you knew him the names of his royal guards. He had never seen you, he was sure of that. And he was quick to confront you, asking you with his tail being dangerously close to you from where you knew his royal guards names and why you had called him Meruem. What were you? And from where had you come from?

🐈🎻💥👑It was for you a situation to cry about and you did cry a bit, knowing that he might not believe you and end up piercing your head. But lying wouldn’t be useful either, so you told him, or to be accurate stuttered, the truth out. And this caused different reactions. Shaiapouf was enraged, yelling at you that you shouldn’t lie to his king like this. Did you think that his king was dumb?! Meruem on the other hand just stared at you, judging whether you were lying or not. His intuition was very sharp, not getting the feeling that you were lying to him. And that definitely caused his interest to grow in you. He had never really thought about whether other worlds really existed or not. Sure, there were countless theories, but the possibility that you were from another world fascinated him, the thought that he would be the first and only one to explore such a secret to his world made him somewhat excited. Had you any proof that you were from another world?

🐈🎻💥👑You did, pulling with shaking hands your phone out and showing him different pictures, including him and his royal guards, some even showing him and Komogi playing Shogi. And Meruem was sure that some of the photos from him, most likely fanart or screenshots from mobage cards, were scenarios he had never done before. It was enough for him to believe you, Shaiapouf on the other hand searching desperately for an excuse to prove that you were just a liar. That you just wanted to trick the king. So when you suggested out of nowhere that he could use his Spiritual Message to convince himself that you weren’t lying, he was shocked?! How did a disgraceful creature like you knew his abilities?! Nevertheless, he had planned on doing it anyways, letting his scales scatter around you and allowing him to see your emotions. And he would have lied if he would have said he didn’t feel despair when seeing the emotion honesty. You weren’t lying, giving Meruem the final confirmation that you had spoken the truth.

🐈🎻💥👑It was Meruem who decided to keep you, feeling excited to have a universe traveler in his palms. He would be most likely the only one who would owe someone like you and a king should have after all very rare things under his possession. And you were one of a kind. Neferpitou approved, they themself being very curious about you. Menthuthuyoupi hadn’t really an opinion about you back then, just doing as the king acted. And Shaiapouf blamed himself. A catastrophe!! Two humans near his royalty!! How could he call himself a royal guard when he couldn’t even keep all the scum away from his king?!?!

🐈🎻💥👑At first life was pretty hard for you, Meruem expecting you to listen to him and follow his every wishes. When he asked you questions, mainly about your world and you, you had to answer them all, no matter how private they were. You had to be always with him, no matter what. And you had to treat him like a king and know your place. Or else he would punish you. Neferpitou was most likely the guard Meruem ordered to keep a eye on you. Not only so you wouldn’t try anything, but also because he knew that Pouf wasn’t the most fond of you. Youpi was the one who acted the most respectful to you, being very polite.

👑And Meruem was also the one who became obsessed with you at first. It was most likely due to the fact that he had considered himself as superior, believing that he knew about everything there was to know in this world. But there wasn’t. A simple weak human, not even requiring the cells needed to activate Nen, was the thing that held the key to one of the hugest secrets in his world. It was intriguing for him, knowing that he was the only one who owned someone like you. Whilst life with him was at first pretty hard, over time he became much more softer with you, mainly due to the fact that you teached him, next to Komogi, a lot more human traits. After some time he even wanted you to call him Meruem instead of king or majesty. He liked that name, especially when it came from your lips. He wanted you always near him and after some time even allowed you to spend some time with Komogi, letting you watch the matches and taking pleasure in teaching you how to play games like Shogi. It didn’t matter that much to him that you were bad at it, just encouraging you to keep trying.

🐈Neferpitou was the next one to become obsessed because their king had formed an obsession with you. But even before that they had displayed a huge interest for you, their cat-like curiosity getting the best of them. They felt more than just honored when their majesty chose them as your personal guardian, taking their role more than just serious. Most of the time you were with the king, but there were moments where Pitou got some time alone with you and these times were used to ask you some questions about your world. Pitou would be in this scenario a lot less cruel than as if their king would be already dead. Simply because the king ordered to not hurt you. And Pitou is undyingly loyal to their king, following his orders. They took over time a clear liking to the fact that you found their tail and ears so appealing, even allowing you to pet them and pull on their ears or tail. Since Neferpitou also possessed the most medic knowledge, they were the ones who always took care of you if you hurt yourself.

💥Youpi was the third one who fell for you. He had never really had an opinion about you before. He had followed orders from his king. His king had wanted you and he had accepted that. And as long as you didn’t possess a threat he had never had a problem with you. So his obsession would root from the adoration he often sees the king displaying with you. His majesty looks happy with you, making Youpi fond of you since you make his royalty happy. And this will lead to his obsession, the more he watches the more he would start feeling something for you. He has no human DNA in him, making him never really realize his feelings for you. He would just start protecting you from the distance, not really minding that Pitou spends the most time with you. As long as he knows that you make his king happy and you yourself are healthy and happy, he’s happy as well.

🎻Shaiapouf, the most extreme Yandere here, is the one who would fall the last for you. He saw you at first just as another thing that would make his king weak, even worse than Komogi. He would need a bit of time, where Meruem and Neferpitou will be very careful with him, until he would finally start accepting you and starting to view you as the only human worthy being with his king. And you can believe that when he found out about his feelings he threw a drama tantrum, crying and whining about how disgusting he was, daring to not only fall for a human, but for his king’s darling as well. How could he dare?! At the beginning he would be a bit of a stricter type, expecting you to be the most perfect you can be for his king, often lecturing you about your behavior. But overtime he would start getting more and more delusional and more and more into worshipper mode until he’s reached his full obsession. And from there he would start envying Pitou’s spot, wishing to be in their position. Would try about everything to gain your trust and proving to Meruem that he can take good care of you, preparing your food, making your bed, buying you clothes and being always there when you wish for something. Would be over the moon if you would compliment him or and feels also a certain pride, despite knowing he shouldn’t, that you like his wings so much. He isn’t worthy of such honor! Would be also the type to try to isolate you from everyone except his king of course.

🐈🎻💥👑Meruem would figure it out on his own, the interest his royal guards seemed to have formed with you. Let’s be honest, Shaiapouf probably even told him himself, sobbing for forgiveness for such a sin and earned most likely a slap from Meruem’s tail, crashing into the wall. Meruem isn’t someone to share and Shaiapouf was prepared to take his punishment. But then you interfered, begging for forgiveness and asking Meruem to not kill Pouf. And that led to Shaiapouf crying even harder, wailing that you from all people shouldn’t ask for forgiveness, especially not for such lowlife like him.

🐈🎻💥👑It will still just work out in Meruem’s favor here since all of the royal guards only listen to him and you, but he’ll always have the last and final word. The royal guards wouldn’t get much private time since you spend the biggest part of your time with Meruem. Menthuthuyoupi prefers anyways to adore you from a distance. Pitou as your personal guard gets some time alone, liking to play around with you like a cat with it’s owner. And Pouf, over time being able to rank as your personal servant, would be the one to wake you up in the morning, serve you breakfast, play the violin if you ask him too and take care of your wishes, also being ready to prepare everything if you should tell that you want to learn something new. Meruem would be actually really happy whenever you want to learn something new, liking it when he can teach you, or watching how you practice on your own. Would feel really mad whenever Pouf teaches you something, leading him to order Shaiapouf to leave you. Shaiapouf would be from all the royal guards the most eager to spend time with you.

🐈🎻💥👑But neither Menthuthuyoupi, Shaiapouf nor Neferpitou would ever dare to touch you or kiss you, that right only reserved for their king. Meruem would overtime force you into these kind of things, after he learned that people tend to do this. He would often demand you to sit on his lap whilst sitting on his throne or hold your hand. The only kind of affection the royal guards will get is when you touch them and all of them would absolutely love this.

🐈🎻💥👑No one is allowed to touch you, scratch you or make you cry. You’re kept away from all the other Chimera Ants, no one of those four wanting you near uncultivated foot soldiers. That does not mean that some might know about you, but they would just never see you. And they better do not talk bad about you because Meruem will find out about it, his royal guards reporting everything dutifully to him. And that person will get executed in a cruel way.

🐈🎻💥👑Komogi would be your only friend and only person allowed next to you. Meruem feels sympathy for Komogi and likes her, the only reason she’s allowed to be your friend. And judging by the way how she acts towards Meruem, she would be totally respectful and dorky around you, using honorifics since you’re the king’s partner. Not everyone is that appreciating of this though, Shaiapouf disliking Komogi and seeing her as a danger for you and the king.

[descriptev]

oh my god I can’t believe the number of reblogs agreeing with this post I saw where they compared c!connor and c!dream’s prison experiences, and then called out c!dream apologists for not vilifying c!dream for abusing a child when c!connor, who was imprisoned for a similar amount of time, hasn’t... What?!!!  do none of you have cognitive reasoning????!!!  

you very clearly don’t understand c!dream’s character in the fucking slightest, and you are making no effort to do so.  but some of us ARE,,, and we don’t deserve to be called abuse apologists.  and the fact is, c!connor and c!dream are completely different characters with completely different experiences, both in and out of prison. comparing them is wild!!!

and I’m so sick of this take that c!dream abused a child out of pure malice and obsession!  I’m sorry, but your precious little c!tommy was (and still is) annoying!!!  and I’m glad c!dream both exiled and killed him.  there, I said it!  story-wise it was interesting and well-acted.  cc!tommy especially did extremely well playing taumatized, scared, and suicidal.  it changed the roleplay forever.  and his character’s feeling and thoughts about exile and dying are valid as fuck, don’t get me wrong.  but some of you only focus on c!tommy’s pov, and never stop to consider c!dream’s motives beyond the superficial “villain bad, he hurt tommy.” 

my personal opinion, c!dream was being pragmatic by isolating c!tommy, becuase c!tommy has a way of worming himself into situations and causing lots of problems (yes, c!tommy has character flaws!!! shocking!)  c!dream has his own mysterious things to deal with and c!tommy kept getting in the way of him achieving his goals, so he had to do something about him.  was it a “good” thing that he did?  no!  and we all agree on that!  but that shouldn’t go down as the only thing c!dream’s character is ever remembered for.  look, I’m not vilifying my favorite character just because he did something bad to your favorite character.  that would be ridiculous!  stop trying to convince me that I’m in the wrong for daring to like the antagonist for being the antagonist.

c!dream is a goddamn beautiful and tragic and badass character, and some of you are too blinded by real world concepts of “right” and “wrong” to even bother taking a single interest in him outside of what he’s doing to c!tommy.  try being objective for once in your goddamn lives!!  try seeing this story from other people’s points of view.  and yeah, cc!dream never streams his pov, but we all have the ability to infer how he’s feeling and theorize what his motives and plans are by just paying fucking attention!   there were plenty of people theorizing about the disc finale confrontation in the vault being staged long before it was confirmed last week, because they were considering c!dream’s pov.

and honestly, what I really want to get through to all of you, human being to human being, once you start considering other people’s points of view in fiction, maybe you’ll start doing it in real life, too.  a push for diversity in fiction means more than just diversity in the characters’ appearances, or sexual preferences, or genders, or personalities.  It also means diversity in thoughts and morals.  in real life, people do and should be allowed to have different morals than you.  

art (and the dream smp is the most ambitious piece of art I’ve seen in a long time) is meant to make you consider what is or isn’t moral and help you explain some of your own morals with other people in order to receive feedback that could shape or fortify your beliefs.  it’s not meant to force everyone to agree or disagree with a certain concept.  humans are allowed to have free thought.  some may argue, that is the point of being a human being.  we should not get cancelled for voicing those thoughts aloud.  this is the free internet and we’re allowed to have our own takes on the media we consume.  and we are allowed to criticize a take that we find flimsy at best.  comparing c!dream’s and c!connor’s prison experiences is soooo flimsy, and honestly, disrespectful.

I know I’ve had disrespectful takes in the past as well (hell, some of you might consider this to be a disrespectful take and I can’t really argue with you there), but I’m trying to grow and learn from those mistakes.  I am human.  we make mistakes from time to time and hurt people without meaning to.  but it would be nice of you all listened when we’re hurt and attempt to understand why we are hurt. it will lead to a nicer fandom environment, I’m sure of it.

[alfredosauce50]

Hi! I was wondering if you could do some Romano + Prussia x royal reader (separate) headcannons? I'm a sucker for a good forbidden romance and would be happy to see what you want to do with it. Thank you!

Yes, of course! Sorry for the kinda late response--I got carried away writing other things. What a coincidence that I've been doing a lot of exploring in fantasy! The reader is referred to as she/her.

Forbidden Romance Headcanons - Prussia and S. Italy

Prussia - The earnest pickpocket and sheltered princess

Unfortunately, Gilbert is on the wrong side of history. As an albino, he's been an outcast ever since he was born. In an age of superstition and class divide, his parents had no problem abandoning an extra mouth to feed. Especially when they were a demon with magical powers. Left to fend for himself as a baby, he only ever survived thanks to the generosity of an old neighbor. When they passed away due to old age, he had to get on by himself on the streets. Stealing, lying, whatever it takes to get some quick cash. And he's been doing it ever since he was five.

He loved fairytales ever since he was a kid. His guardian always told him these stories before bedtime, after all. They said it was good luck to give the princess a flower, and he remembered this a few years later during the royal parade in town. Pushing through the crowd of onlookers, he held out a small dandelion hoping you would take it. Before the guards could swat him away, you took the flower with a smile. All you remembered from that time was a small and dirty face gleaming up at you. And, of course, a pair of striking red eyes you would never forget.

In his adolescence, he became a thief with quick hands. It wasn't until he took on the most dangerous job of all did he make himself a public enemy. Stealing the royal family's jewels. And he would've gotten away with it if he wasn't forced to take a detour through the princess's bedroom. Unbeknownst to him, you were wide awake. Immediately, you recognized him as the little boy from that day. Without thinking, you hid him in your wardrobe until the guards left. That was the start of a strange friendship forged between two people from two worlds--a dirt-poor criminal and the well-loved princess of a thriving kingdom.

He visits you from time to time by climbing up the side of the castle. When he first did it, you practically throttled him by his collar, screaming, “Do you have a death wish? They'll throw you to the lions if you get caught!”. He simply responds with, “The awesome me never gets caught! That's why I'm here, ja?” Soon, this becomes routine until you learn to trust him.

Gilbert loves gloating about his adventures as a street rat, whether it's about singlehandedly beating up gangs of bullies or outrunning the palace guards. As a sheltered person of royalty, his stories reflect experiences alien to you. But it opens your eyes to things you've never seen, and it's very fascinating.

If he's not telling grossly exaggerated anecdotes of his greatness, he'll bring in board games and cards he “borrowed” from his friends. You've never played with them before as your parents deemed them unrefined. It fills him with pride to see you enjoying yourself so much, especially when he's teaching you how to play.

You don't go out very often, so he always brings back little trinkets and souvenirs. When you found out he stole them all, you would hit him on the head and tell him off. “Where did you get these from? Stealing and giving these to the princess--do you know how stupid that sounds?” Then, you would pinch his cheek until he tears up and admits his wrongs. “I-I thought you would like them, okay? I wanted to give them to you as a present...” The next day, you would accompany him to the shops he robbed and pay the owners back.

He gets upset and embarrassed when he realizes those gifts aren't gifts at all. Not when you paid for them yourself! One of the ways he shows affection is through giving gifts, but that unfortunately clashes with not having money. So he's eager to make something out of himself, even if he has to work as a bottom feeder and face unfair treatment for what he looks like. When you find out, his boss gets one hell of a time dealing with you. After that, he uses whatever small amount he earned to buy something for you.

As he grows out of his old habits, he becomes more honest. In fact, he's so determined to prove himself that he shows up one day with a homemade board game scribbled out on a spare piece of parchment. He's nervous and twiddling his fingers, and that's when you know you have to help him get back onto his feet. He's so touched by your kindness that he shows you a secret he's been hiding forever--he can do magic. It's one of his skills that let him become so good at stealing in the past.

After some practice to touch up his abilities, you try convincing your parents to let him work in the palace as an all-rounder. With the magic dancing in his fingertips, there's nothing he can't do. He has a green thumb, good reflexes, and the horses in the stables listen to him better than the caretaker! He can't forget that you encouraged him to let go of his doubts and previous identity as a petty thief. There's nobody in the world he looks up to more.

On the night of your eighteenth birthday, he's invited to a ball to celebrate. Once again, he finds himself anxious to see you in your dress, especially when he's quite glammed up himself with his suit and hair slicked back. While you teach him how to dance, he tells you he looks ridiculous. But you think otherwise and make it explicit. That's when Gilbert realizes he's completely smitten with you. He embarks on another journey to improve himself until he thinks he deserves you.

South Italy - The plebeian pâtissier and renegade royal

War has ravaged the kingdom and eaten into the state's reserves, leaving inflation rates at an all-time high. The suffering middle and working-class take it up to their rulers in a coup d'état, killing the king and queen. And now, they're searching for the princess amidst the chaos of an ungoverned dominion. Romano couldn't be more indifferent to such a cause, only ever caring about putting food on the table. He works day and night helping out his family's bakery, making what he can to get by. However, he's forced to take a side when he finds a girl on his doorstep on the verge of starvation.

Unable to turn away someone in need, he nurses you back to health. However, he does so with spite, wondering to himself why he has to give what little he has left to a princess. When you feel better after a few days, he's eager to send you off but changes his mind as you leave. Romano can't bear to let you face certain death, or worse, knowing how bitter the townspeople are about the unpopular war. So he welcomes you back with a sharp sigh with his head turned away. “Alright, alright, you can stay. Now stop making that pathetic face, you spoilt principessa--it's depressing.”

He relays a few house rules as conditions for keeping you around. You have to help him with chores. Cooking, cleaning, sewing, everything. Considering you always had someone doing those tasks for you, you're hopeless at it. He'll swat your hand and show you how to do things right with an annoyed scowl. “No, no, no, no, no! You're doing it all wrong. This is how you do it. What do they even teach you in that palace, huh? Books? Maths? Books about maths? Well, they won't keep you alive, you know!”

Because he's so observant and strict, he's a good teacher, and soon, you get the hang of everything. Before, he had to open his mouth to correct you every few seconds, but now, he can just watch you do his work with his arms crossed. It's a little demeaning to have someone watch your every move, but inside, he's relieved you're finally fitting in and not a complete waste of his time and resources. In reality, he never wanted to send you off and hoped he could just handle an extra mouth to feed. Not that he'll ever tell you.

When you're out and about, he makes you wear a cloak to hide your identity. When he's forced to interact with people, he'll hold you close and play everything off without arousing suspicion. Even if your hood falls off, he won't react--he's screaming inside in panic, but he's a great actor when he needs to be. You're totally not the princess, just a crazy similar doppelganger. The cloak is there so that people don't make a fuss. When they leave, he'll turn to you and scream how much of an idiot you are. But really, he was just worried to death--and you have a feeling he was. So you hug it out and leave him cussing with a red face.

As you two grow closer, his cousin Antonio notices how much he cares about you despite his efforts to hide it. It's a problem. He approaches him and warns that if people found out he was hiding the princess, he would get killed with her. Romano heats up and screams, telling him that he already knew what he got into the second he let you into his home. When he's asked why he's still keeping you around, he responds with, “It's not fair that her parents fucked up, and she has to face the consequences. Just like how I never wanted to run this stupid bakery--I wanted to be a painter, not burn my hands in the kitchen all day!”

Unbeknownst to him, you overhear the conversation. The next morning, he discovers that you're gone and loses his head. While he's screaming and crying, he's swarmed with the possibilities of what happened to you. He's a bit of an overthinker, but his paranoia is deserved--were you taken away in the middle of the night? Are you even still alive? He spirals down a path of self-loathing until he confronts how much he misses you, then his regret of never being frank with his feelings. Romano didn't understand what he had until he lost it. To say this was a wake-up call--to be more honest with himself--would be an understatement.

A week later, you return unscathed. Turns out, you left to stay with the owner of a paint shop owner your family always supported and bought from. You present him with a gift of some high-end oil paints, brushes, and canvases. When he sets them all down, he'll pull you into a tight hug, and once again, tell you how stupid you are. While he has you in his coils, you smile to yourself as you pat his hair, happy that you also got something in return. Some transparency. “I just thought I'd give you something... For all the trouble.” You'd say, and he'd shush you with a few hard kisses. “You were never a trouble. I wanted you to stay, so I'm more to blame than you.”

As the political situation of the country calms down, so do the anxieties of angry neighbors pounding on his door. You return to his home much to his content. Now that you're just as good as him at icing cakes, you spend more time running the bakery. This gives him some time to paint, and he can't be happier. Once you both get settled, he discovers another hobby on top of making art. Making coffee! The bakery evolves into a café lavishly decorated with his paintings, and it becomes the most popular establishment in town. You both realize how overrated it is to want to be anything more--you never bring up your title ever again.

[itsagrimm]

Imperial!Tech 3

Summary: Tech's chip activated instead of Crosshairs so Tech is now an imperial commander tasked to serve the Empire at any cost. But is he willing to do so? And are you, dear Y/N as member of the experimental Elite Squad, willing to follow any order your commander Tech gives?

CN: self-harm, talk of death murder and war crimes, stalker behaviour, soldier life in a fascist state, power imbalance, overreaching behaviour, structural violence, sexually predatory behaviour and the likes, sensual overload, insomnia, references of drug abuse, depression and mental health issues, trauma

Imperial!tech X they*them Y/N reader, afab

Thanks a lot to @eyecandyeoz for your insight, feedback and thoughts. Check out their lovely blog!

I am sorry it took me so long. next part will be faster. I already started writing it.

And feel free to criticise especially concerning my use of CN and if the reader perspective is inclusive for you.

2800 words

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4

Tech collapsed into the chair as soon as Y/N had left the room. He was tired, so tired. He leaned back and put on his glasses. Him taking off his visual aids around Y/N was a degree of trust Tech rarely allowed. He was nearly blind without his glasses and the Kaminoans had considered terminating him for that. Tech was sure Y/N did not even know how much he had surrendered himself to Y/N and their touch. Their oh so soft touch. The memory of it was still fresh on his skin. It raced through is mind which for once was craving to match his body with the need to slow down and take a rest.

But it didn’t.

Y/N was pleasant to be around. Their touch was careful and considered. Only his brothers used to treat him like his. – His brothers, the former clone force 99, had left him behind after they refused to comply with order 66. Due to their divergence the inhibitor chip had not worked while he, Tech, had tried to kill the Jedi. – He had tried to kill a child. – The effect of the inhibitor chip was decreasing. His wound received on Bracca had an 84,743 % chance of damaging the inhibitor chip. But he should investigate further and get the chip out to stop any possible interference with his superior thought process. - Y/N was not aware of the inhibitor chips. He felt the need to tell them. Why? – The Havoc Marauder had not been mentioned on the imperial comm chatter for a while. – Echo was likely to take care of the ship now. – He should get some sustenance. He felt hunger. – Y/N – The Empire expected a degree of loyalty, uniformity, and compliance he was unsure he could deliver for long considering his diverging mind. – what would Hunter do? – the kaminoan proverb “yn’ja tha vaí m°O” was untranslatable into Basic but could be understood in Sit Bisti as “it needs tö be döne för the betterment öf äll”- The Empire was unlikely to grant him the freedom to find his brothers or in fact any freedom. – The canteen might serve Tiingilar tonight – He was a child slave destined to die in approximately 34,6 standard yearly rotations from old age if not sooner. – maybe the canteen will serve uj’alayi too. – Does Y/N speak Mando’an? He should enquire. – Of course, there will be no uj’alayi today. The Kaminoans did not allow sweet foods. – Y/N – How did the atmospheric controls work that ensured breathable air even for the highest floors of coruscanti buildings? - He knew why his brothers left him behind, but why did it feel so painful. – The empire was likely to kill him if he out served his usefulness for them. - He had tried to kill a child. He had killed several children on Onderon. How could he live with that? How could-

Tech forced his thoughts to stop by digging his fingers into his bloody scar.

The sharp pain felt soothing.

“Let’s consider making a list of the most pressing tasks for now.”

He starred at the ceiling.

“The Empire. It is the closest threat to my demise, but it can be my salvation if I am useful. Am I willing and capable to do that?”

His head started spinning again just at the thought of killing another child for the Empire. And yet serving the Empire gave him purpose he wasn’t sure he could muster on his own.

“Where are my brothers? How are they? How do I feel about them?”

Another unpleasant wave of thoughts and feelings washed over Tech before he continued.

“What is with the inhibitor chip inside my head?”

He nodded to himself. That was a rational and containable problem with fixed variables and clear answers. He felt comfortable with that question, pushing aside all the things he might have done due to being under the chips influence.

Only one question was left now.

“Why do I enjoy Y/N presence?”

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ryloth had a warm and dusty climate during daytime. Y/N felt sweat dripping under the dark armour. The elite squad, including a new ES-03, was ordered to stand close by to Admiral Rampart, the highest imperial officer on Ryloth. And so, they had spent the last rotations following the Admiral around, doing tedious security work and presenting themselves like the Admirals favourite guard dogs to a public very much disliking their military presence. For once, even commander Tech looked annoyed about their not spec-ops appropriate services.

Today they were on the outlook. The Admiral wanted them scanning a large crowd for troublemakers and resistance fighters during a public announcement. Y/N couldn’t blame them. The Twi’lek of Ryloth had spent years fighting for their independence and spilled an ocean of blood on the dusty planet’s surface only to face an Empire now. Half a life ago Y/N would have hated themselves for being a soldier in service of a suppressing ruler. But now it was paid work.

“ES-01?”, Commander Tech brought Y/N back from their thoughts

“I am in position before the crowd.”

“ES-02?”

“Yes sir, I am on the building as you ordered.”

“ES-03?”

“Any nonimperial transmissions are being blocked now.”

“ES-04?”

“The war hawk is ready for take-off in case we need it.”

“Good. Do you register any noteworthy activity?

Y/N gazed through the crowd. They were mostly Twi’lek, waiting to hear from their leaders. All of them were in civilian clothing, none came with visible weapons.

“I can’t spot anything, sir.”

Tech said nothing. But Y/N could hear him type something.

“Analysing previous rebel fighter behaviour and strategies in similar situations they are likely to appear at these coordinates within the crowd today. I am sending you a list for you to especially pay attention to, ONCE.”, he finally said using the moniker the elite squad had given Y/N.

“Yes sir.”

Y/N looked at their holopad and started checking the coordinates commander Tech had calculated. At entry four they spotted their targets.

“Commander. I have a visual about 40 meters from my position, 10 o’clock. There are two fighters. Twi’lek. One female and one male passing. Shade of blue and orange.”

A moment everyone was silent.

“Confirmed.”, ES-02 stated.

Another moment passed.

“Observe them for now. Stay alert.”, Tech ordered before ending the transmission.

High above the Twi’lek senator started to talk. Y/N could not remember his name and paid little attention to his words. Unlike the Twi’lek.

“They are not happy.”, ES-02 stated flatly.

“Yeah thanks, I would not have noticed without you.”

“Always a pleasure to help out, ONCE.”

ES-02 was right. The crowd was angry. The imperial presence, the empty words of some disaffected politician, the fresh memories of the clone war. It was no surprise that the Twi’lek called out for their resistance leaders to speak.

“We want Syndulla! We want Syndulla!”, the crowd chanted.

A different voice from above started speaking. The crowd calmed down, not entirely happy but at least not a raging mob.

“At least we will not have to gun them down, now.”, ES-02 mumbled with a bitter voice.

“Would you really do that, two?”

“You know what they say, good soldiers follow orders, ONCE. And I intend to be one. Especially when I’m getting paid for it.”

XXXXXXXXXXX

Rampart was an asshole. He was a smug little administrator, willing to lie, back-stab and sacrifice whatever needed to achieve his goals. Rampart was the perfect general to handle a loaded situation like the one on Ryloth. And he was no fool.

Y/N hat noticed that he had kept both commander Tech and Howzer, the commanding clone trooper in charge of the regular clone troopers on Ryloth, close. A strategic move. Spec-ops commandos like the elite squad and regular commandos were in constant competition and mistrust to each other. Should one commander not deliver or even consider treason the other would interfere. And Rampart would always end up on the winning side of their clone infighting.

Y/N could here their arguing inside the office.

Commander Tech had ordered for Y/N to wait outside the office for new orders.

More arguing from the office was audible until finally Ramparts voice cut their bickering short.

The door opened and Howzer left. His expression was that of a practised reserved solider hiding his worries.

The door opened again, and commander Tech stepped outside of Ramparts office.

He looked tense.

Instead of a greeting or an order he just started walking. They followed him.

“Clone force 99 is here. But we are kept on a short leash. As always.”, Tech stated, “It is implausible to not use the best tools possible when confronted with a problem. Howzers troopers will not be able to beat them if necessary. Just like they won’t be able or unwilling to beat the Twi’lek should the need arise.”

Since Kamino the commander had started to share more of his thoughts with Y/N. All they had left to do was to listen and ask the right questions.

“Sir, you think Howzer will commit subordination?”

“There is a possibility of him and his men disagreeing with the new imperial leadership and it’s methods. Howzers unit has fought alongside the Twi’leks the past years. Bounds forged in the trenches can be stronger than loyalty to an administrator from Coruscant. But I require further data to assess the likelihood of treason.”

“What about clone force 99?”

“Their abilities and erratic strategies will be a challenge should we … no, should I have to face them.”

“So, we did not get the order to hunt them down?”

“No. Not yet.”

“And yet you already imply them as of importance.”

“It would be a grave strategic mistake to dismiss their presence.”

“So, what is the elite squad going to do about them? What are your orders, sir?”

Tech paused and adjusted his glasses.

“We are going to do nothing.”

“Sir!?”

“Don’t.” There was a warning in his voice. A signal to Y/N not to cross a line, invisible yet perceptible. He was after all a commander and Y/N just a soldier.

“I am sorry. I overstepped. You are in charge.”

He turned, stepped away and looked at Y/N. His eyes scrutinized them like a scientist inspecting a rare specimen of remarkable value.

They shivered.

His gaze was intriguing. It was painful to feel on display like that. And yet it was nearly intimate to be studied by Tech. Unsure if he would finally hit Y/N for their countless discretions or if he just contemplated their objections.

Finally, Tech nodded appeased and continued his walking without any further talk.

“What do you want us to do now, sir?”

Tech stopped.

“What do I want you to do now?”, Tech repeated as if the question had a different meaning to him than it had to Y/N.

He took out his holopad only to put it away again. He cleared his throat.

“I need you to stay alert. The situation is complicated. For now, get some sleep. The chances are below 4,65 % that there will be a significant development within the next two hours. After that I except the elite squad to be combat ready.”

“Yes sir.”

XXXXXXXXX

The Refresher room was empty. Most clones avoided the elite squad, and all the other members of their unit were taking a nap before the night shift which left Y/N to have the large washroom for themselves.

They signed.

Taking a shower and having some alone time to think and feel before finally taking a rest was what they needed.

Y/N started to strip out of the armour.

First, they took of the helmet, then the vambraces and shin guards before getting the shoulder pieces and lifting the heavy breast armour off before finally getting out of the abdomen armour. The black katarn fell to the floor, making loud echoing noises.

Y/N didn’t care. No one was to correct them on their improper handling of equipment here.

And as much as the armour was a useful necessity, it was a heavy burden in more than one way.

Their blacks followed and soon Y/N was standing under the refresher, naked and alone.

The water was hot and painful.

It was a welcome distraction to all the feelings of … well what exactly?

Y/N felt tears running down their face.

No, no, no. It’s just the refresher.

An uptight sob escaped Y/Ns throat. It was all so different from what they imagined. They had entered imperial service for the payment during a desperate time. And ended up witnessing murder after murder, committing murder.

Today they could have become accomplices to killing a crowd of innocent Twi’leks. And Y/N knew that they would have complied with the order to open fire on the civilians if given. How could they not? Surrounded by troopers like them, ordered around by heartless and calculating commanders.

Would Tech give a killing order like this?

Was he that heartless?

He had done so before.

He had killed so many times before their eyes and yet a piece of Y/N refused to see him as a murderer. In fact, they felt shameful about feeling and thinking about Tech – about their commanding officer – at all.

Y/N stopped fighting the tears and cried out loud.

Nobody would know about this.

Nobody would know about their doubt and vulnerability.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

As always sleep had been an unwilling friend to visit Tech. With a sigh he gave up and got up from the cot. As always, his mind was racing. He had tried the breathing techniques Crosshair taught him after a particular long stretch of insomnia, but it didn’t work.

And Tech wasn’t in the mood to experiment with the vast collection of sedatives to force his body to sleep right before possibly facing his brothers and definitely meeting admiral Rampart soon.

Work it was then.

His holopad listed only unchallenging administrative tasks.

The new Shuttle was in top shape.

His weapons were cleaned.

Tech had nothing to keep is overthinking brain in check.

Kriff, his life really was miserable. A never-ending effort to bringing his spiralling mind some peace.

A notification came in.

What a blessing.

Tech looked at the holopad again. It was just a reminder to check on his subordinates, to listen in on their private talks and vital signs.

The order from Imperial Command was an uncomfortable task but it was the best he had to do right now. And listing in on some snoring was better than listening to the elite squads talk like last time. At least it felt less overreaching.

He started with ES-04 and workout down from there. Four was in deep slumber, nothing of interest to note. ES-03 was still new and his sleep was restless, a few murmurs about his home planet and family escaped his lips. ES-02 was dreaming. His heartrate was accelerated. Tech turned his observation of, not interested in the rutting sounds of ES-02.

ES-01 was left. ONCE. Y/N. The thought of peeping into their private life was not only uncomfortable, but it also felt violent to strip Y/N of their peace and privacy.

And yet, Y/N was the only one Tech WANTED to know more about. He felt his desire to learn more about Y/N like a physical need, an addicting obsession Tech knew he needed to be careful with not to indulge.

Was their slumber peaceful and sweet?

Did they have dreams about home?

Or did they fight their nightmares in sleep just like they did awake?

He swallowed.

He was just following an order.

He will do nothing more.

He was just a good soldier.

Y/N wasn’t asleep. Their bucket was off and there were no vital signs coming of them. But the acoustic signal was working.

Y/N was somewhere with a lot of echoes and running water.

Tech felt himself blushing and getting hot.

They were in the shower.

It felt so right to listen in on Y/N. Tech felt bad about it.

The thought of water running down their bare and naked body made Techs mind slow like nothing ever before. The pleasure of a calm mind made him groan.

He hesitated. This was not okay. He shouldn’t listen. He shouldn’t imagine a subordinate like that. He hated that he had to. He hated that the Empire gave him order to do so. But more than that he hated himself for following that order so willingly.

He reached for the off button on his holopad.

A sob.

Was that Y/N? Were they crying?

Tech’s mind went from zero into overdrive. He needed to know who or whatever made you feel like crying. He would find out. And he would remove whatever it was from your life.

Part 4

[thefirsttree]

A personal update + my next game

OK, time to do this. I’ve been meaning to do a big DAVID WEHLE™ update for a while now and explain why I haven’t released a new game yet, but you know how life gets in the way. Especially when life is a quarantine hellscape, you have three beautiful, amazing, exhausting kids to raise, a spouse’s job you support, a viral YouTube channel that turns your brain to mush, a thousand emails waiting in your inbox since your game is free on the Epic Games Store (with an impressive number of redemptions too! … meaning lots of emails and customer support issues), etc., etc. What also contributes to my lack of updates is because… I just don’t really like posting online. Fascinating correlation, I know!

Don’t worry, this isn’t going to be a venting/ranting blog post (well, maybe a bit), because my life is seriously AMAZING and INSANELY BLESSED and LUCKY. I can’t believe how many dreams keep coming true, so much so that I feel I don’t deserve it and I really pulled the wool over everyone’s eyes… but I did want to at least be honest, because I owe that to myself.

Wow, where do I even begin? Well, how about we start with the reason I’m even a full-time indie game dev now: The First Tree. This small hobby project I worked on at night morphed into this gargantuan beast (or fox) that took over my life the past 5 years. Which is great! I’m living the dream! And yet, I really didn’t expect it to do as well as it did. At its core, my game is a slow-paced, sad walking simulator (ahem, I prefer the term “exploration game,” but you know what I mean) that somehow seemed to launch at the right time to the right audience. It resonated deeply with some of you, and for that I’m eternally grateful. I still get emails almost daily how my game changed their lives in some formative way. I’m beyond honored.

However, with that spotlight came criticism and demands from the ever-present, insatiable internet. I would randomly be surfing the gamedev subreddit trying to decompress, and I would see a comment by some rando saying how much I didn’t deserve my success, and how it was all one huge lucky fluke. And I believed them!

And to add to it, some devs considered me an indie marketing “guru”, which I was uncomfortable with. I worked hard to market my game every week, and after my GDC talk, people assumed marketing was my passion; the reason I got up every morning. Just to clarify… NO, I don’t like marketing, and I hate being the center of attention. I don’t like asking people for money and wishlists. But I did what was necessary because I was passionate about telling stories, and I wanted to give my story a fighting chance to be seen on the crowded pages of Steam.

So now, you’re probably wondering “well then David, why did you make fancy YouTube videos showing off your success? Not very modest if you ask me.” This honestly could be a long blog post all on its own, because my experience of putting myself in the spotlight and becoming a “content creator” is… complicated. It was an unusual step for me, especially since I never even showed my face online (as a game developer) until my GDC talk.

First off, I always wanted to teach and start a YouTube channel. I love video editing, especially since I’ve been doing it longer than making games! It’s a huge passion of mine. And teaching people who didn’t know they could make and finish games was a huge motivator (and it’s been so rewarding already). But the second reason is, I was scared. I was self-employed, and I was riding the success of a “huge lucky fluke” that would probably not happen again. I wanted to make sure I could provide for my amazing family, and give them food and health insurance and security in these tumultuous times. I was turning my lifelong passions and hobbies into a business, and it wasn’t as simple of a mental transition as I thought.

So, I went all in on YouTube and the accompanying online course called Game Dev Unlocked. I spent years editing the scripts and videos, and polishing them to a shine. At first, no one watched my videos, no one was buying… and in the blink of an eye, the YouTube algorithm picked up my main autobiographical video (“How Making Indie Games Changed My Life”), and I started getting 5,000 subscribers a day. Right now, I’m at 150,000 subs, which is still hard for me to believe. I always had a dream of earning 100k subs on YouTube, so I was pretty happy with the whole thing. Sales were OK, but mostly people didn’t want to buy the course. Then the emails came in…

Something you should know about me: I am a textbook “people pleaser,” and if someone asks for my help, I take it very seriously. If someone is mad at me, even if I didn’t do anything wrong, it’s all I can think about, and it ruins my day. So, taking an onslaught of people begging for help and multiplying that by an impossible amount of people for my brain to truly comprehend thanks to the internet… and let’s just say it wasn’t a healthy mix.

I received thousands of emails from people who were begging me for some kind of reassurance that everything would be OK. That their dreams would come true too. And I wanted to help every single one of them. I went from a nobody working on a game for fun to becoming a spokesperson for the indie game dream. I couldn’t even get a shake from the Chick-Fil-A drive-thru without someone recognizing me and asking for game dev advice. And it didn’t stop there… I would get emails from suicidal kids asking for help, teenagers from Afghanistan asking me to get them out of their country, and on one occasion I received an email from a hopeful game developer in a war-torn country who had just experienced a bomb blowing up their neighboring village. His friends were dead, and he was hoping he could finish a game before he died too, and he needed my help. How do you say no to something like that? Didn’t I owe it to everyone because I was lucky with my hit game and I needed to “pay it forward”? (Something people constantly reminded me of)

And then to top it off, after you’ve given everything you’ve got to other people in need… you get hate mail in your inbox. You spend the whole day serving your children and strangers on the internet, then when the kids are finally asleep, you hit the bed to relax and take a look at your phone to decompress, and you randomly come across an angry gamer in your Twitter mentions telling you your game they got for free sucks, and that you took away a potentially great game from them and that your apology isn’t good enough.

Long story short, I went to a mental therapist for the first time in my life. I was broken trying to care for two toddlers and a new baby in a pandemic (which is very, very hard), taking care of my course students who gave me their hard-earned money and demanded results, and the countless people begging for help on the internet. I was this introverted, internet-lurker trying to take on the weight of the world. I was so tired and hurt that no one cared about me and my needs… only what I could do for them.

Quitting my day job and making this hobby my full-time job has stirred up… mixed emotions. This statement may disturb some of you, but I was definitely 100% happier when I had a full-time job and I was working on my game at night. I missed working with the amazing team at The VOID, working on Star Wars… back when the success of my game was this abstract thing I could only daydream about. Mostly, I was making my game for me with no outside expectations to pay the bills or satisfy the ever-demanding internet, and that brought me a lot of joy.

It’s not all doom and gloom though! I’m actually very happy now and in the best shape I’ve been since the pandemic started. I’ve had to confront my weaknesses and personality quirks, but I’m a better person for it (and I’m sure these issues would’ve come out eventually). I hired an awesome community manager for Game Dev Unlocked who is helping SO MUCH with the emails, I can’t even tell you the mental burden it alleviates. I even leased a co-working office to help separate work from my home, and that’s been a huge help too. I’ve decided to work with my old friends from The VOID on a cool, new VR experience. It will take me away from my projects a bit, but I’m ecstatic to work with a great team again (and not manage anything, whew).

These are all things I would’ve never guessed I needed, because I thought I knew myself pretty well… turns out I didn’t.

The reality is: running a business is HARD. Running it solo is even harder. You have to remember, I was burnt out on The First Tree well into the Steam release in 2017, but I kept working on it for 4 more years due to my fears of failing again and not earning enough money for my family.

So, I was wrestling with the age-old concept of commercialism and art. There was this dichotomy of doing whatever I wanted and being true to my vision (what most people assume the indie dev dream is like), and doing only what customers wanted to buy. This is something that has killed me with YouTube… in one specific instance, I was super excited to make the exact video I wanted to make. I loved every part of its creation, and I thought it had a message that would inspire everyone. I lovingly edited it over several weeks, posted it, and excitedly waited for the stats… and it was by far my worst performing video.

This is not a new problem. Even the Sistine Chapel by Michelangelo was a commission forced upon him by the very violent Pope Julius II. My wife and I regularly talk about the fine balance between artistic integrity and commercialism, a problem she is very familiar with as an artist who constantly needs to balance what she wants to make with what the customer wants to hang up in their home.

For The First Tree, I was lucky. It was pretty much what I wanted to make (I had to compromise a lot of things of course), and it turned out millions of people wanted it too. Recently, I thought the safe business decision would be to do it all over again, so I started work on a spiritual successor to The First Tree (an idea that I may revisit one day since I do love the story idea). But that isn’t happening anytime soon. Trust me when I say I am now currently burnt out on animal exploration games.

So that realization left me with a question: what do I do next?

I’ve decided I need to make a game that I want to make, for me. It will be a bit different and I’m almost certain most fans of The First Tree will not love it… but it’s an idea that gets me super excited. It’s an idea that could help me fall in love with game development again.

A few more details: this game will be story-driven, first-person, and will use the Unreal Engine. That means development is gonna be slow going, because I have to learn a whole new tool. The “smart business” decision would be to make something quickly in Unity which I’m already familiar with… but I want to do this for me, and UE5 looks like a lot of fun. I’m also shooting for an early-ish release date so I avoid burn out and I keep the game short: I want to release it in Fall 2022, but knowing game development, it will probably take longer.

With the help of my therapist, I’ve also concluded that I’ve been too accessible on the internet and that my self-worth isn’t determined by the amount of people I try to help online. Of course, I love helping people and seeing them succeed, but I need to step back and focus on my family and myself. I will delete my social media apps on my phone (I will still post big updates occasionally) and stop responding to most emails, tweets, DMs, etc. It’s not that I’m ungrateful… in fact, if I don’t say thank you or at least acknowledge the incredibly nice people who share a sweet message about my game or want to tell me how I inspire them (still hard for me to believe, lol), I feel a ton of guilt… but I need to let that go. Please know I’m extremely grateful to all the fans who follow my work, so even if I don’t thank you directly, I truly mean it: thank you.

I will still post and stream occasionally on YouTube when I want to (and I still do live Q&A’s for my GDU students). The online course sales will help support my family as I work on a potentially risky game idea (and my new job will help alleviate the risk too). I’m gonna try one more marketing experiment and sell a mini-course soon (and add an Unreal section), and after that I’m done working on it. A gigantic thank you to the people who bought my course and are part of the amazing community, it has helped me and my family tremendously, and it’s inspiring seeing the games you make!

I’m a bit worried about the whole thing since this new game idea could flop, which could definitely affect my family. But a sappy, high-school yearbook quote is coming to mind…  I think it applies here: “A ship in harbor is safe—but that is not what ships are built for.”

Thanks for reading,

David