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thoughtfulturtleprincess · 3 years

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A non-OP fan’s (slashy/romantic)take on Buggy and Shanks’ relationship

Disclaimer: I’m not a One Piece fan by any stretch so I don’t follow the manga or anime but I’ve seen clips of it here and there on the internet, and got intrigued by the one and only Buggy and his relationship with Shanks. I’ve been thinking a lot about them recently and reading a lot of fics/reddit theories so here’s my take. I’ll most definitely miss stuff so actual fans please jump in and correct me/add things!

Warning: My interpretation is that there is some romantic undertones to their relationship. If you don’t agree with this please don’t read! Thanks :D

1. Shanks and Buggy grew up together on the same ship. Some have suggested that they were only 1 when they were picked up by Roger’s crew, although the youngest we’ve seen them tgt was when they were 9 years old. Regardless, they probably didn’t have much of a chance to form long lasting friendships with other children outside the ship, so their peer group consisted only of each other, and that’s crazy.

2. I feel like these circumstances would’ve led to a form of closeness that supersedes modern friendship. Some have described their bond as a brotherhood, and many have stated that they love each other.

3. However, I feel like brotherly love doesn’t fully explain their dynamic(in the anime version of their Marineford reunion). While it explains why Shanks took care of Buggy when on the Oro Jackson despite their squabbles, why he invited Buggy to go with him after Roger’s execution, and why he seemed quite happy to see Buggy at Marineford aged 39, it doesn’t quite explain why his first instinct there was to make a fool of Buggy, only to brush it off as a whim afterwards. And it most certainly doesn’t explain the most SUS thing about that interaction, which was Shanks’ facial expression and tone of voice. There’s just something very sus about that in particular because it doesn’t feel brotherly, but more like flirtatious teasing??? which Buggy is totally confused by btw.

4. I watched the Japanese version of their reunion. During most of it one of Shanks’ eyebrows was slightly raised in a sort of mischievous way, and just before he walks off he says ‘I know, so don’t be angry.’ in a tone that’s borderline flirtatious???? Does Shanks know that he can placate Buggy with flirtatious teasing?? In that case I wouldn’t call this brotherly love anymore. Does that mean he’s done that in the past and it’s worked???????

5. Perhaps these are artistic liberties that the animators and voice actors have taken, but I assume this is also approved by Oda? Maybe this is a trap for yaoi fangirls and I’ve fallen into it lmao I am not sure how this works - someone more well versed in the mechanics of this please chip in :D In any case, we’ll see where this takes us:

6. There’s 2 things to address here: the trickery, and the borderline playful flirting that happened towards the end. Firstly, the trickery: there’s a power dynamic here and Shanks is the one on top. He’s thinking about how to stop the war, Luffy, and probably other bigger things. When he sees Buggy he probably felt a lot of things then but because of the circumstance, he decides to use him as a way to get something done.

7. It was a funny interaction, and I’m going to over-analyse it. When Buggy refused to help Shanks with the strawhat, it’s interesting that the latter decided to trick him with the false promise of a treasure map, rather than to just say sth along the lines of ‘why not help for old times’ sake’ etc. Perhaps he thinks that Buggy would be too prideful to be swayed by those types of arguments. But perhaps this is where Shanks miscalculated, and why Buggy was so offended lol just a while ago Buggy had helped Luffy because he had been touched by his innocence and resemblance to young Shanks, and here Shanks is basically saying that even after all these years he still thinks Buggy is below matters of the heart.

8. Shanks probably also thinks he can trick Buggy into doing things for him without incurring any real consequence. It’s almost like the ‘I’m just going to say this first and then deal with his reaction later’ type mentality. Let’s face it, what can Buggy do? Fighting is out of the question: the disparity in their power levels seems too large for this to be a concern for Shanks, and Buggy is highly averse to fighting battles that he knows he can’t win. Cutting ties? Well, that’s been done: Buggy rejected Shanks’ offer to join his crew years ago, and they haven’t really met since, so the worst has already happened. Shanks has had years to get over that.

9. Perhaps over time Shanks has become more focused than his easy smiles let on. Ironically, Buggy was the one to criticise Shanks for being soft hearted when they were younger, but ultimately it is Buggy who tears up at the sight of Luffy’s innocence and decides to fight alongside him in Impel Down, and it is him that calls out Shanks’ name in the middle of the battlefield, seemingly without a care for their surroundings or consequences, just to be taken advantage of by the other.

10. Some may say I’m making Shanks sound a bit evil, and that perhaps all of this happened subconsciously. Maybe the sentiment behind tricking Buggy is half a funny way to greet his old comrade, and half a sign that he still remembers a lot about him and on top of that trusts him with his hat.

11. While I agree with the fact that Shanks basically does not have any true malice towards Buggy, I can’t ignore the power dynamic between them. The trickery was funny only to Shanks, not to Buggy, but I think this dynamic fits perfectly with Shanks’ role as the Emperor and Buggy’s as the Clown.

12. Alas, Emperors maintain an indestructible reputation, and Clowns make themselves look bad for laughs. So mb Buggy is just fulfilling that role for Shanks in the story. After all, Shanks is portrayed as a flawless man: he is selfless, ambitious, righteous, protects the weak, stops wars and has never lost a battle in his life. On the other hand, Buggy is portrayed in the complete opposite manner: he is self-serving, duplicitous, scummy, money-loving and lazy.

13. It’s kind of sad that Buggy was basically born into(afaik his nose is natural) this role though and is forced to make the most out of it.

14. Secondly, the playful flirtatiousness(I keep using this word because I feel like that’s the vibe he gave off at the end of one of the clips I saw lmao): Shanks is not really treating Buggy as an adult in his own right, but acts as if Buggy is a child(or capricious lover??) that has to be coaxed into doing the right thing. That’s also borderline disrespectful, but it could just be a matter of them having been apart for such a long time that Shanks automatically defaulted to their old, childish ways because he hadn’t really had the chance to get to know Buggy as an adult.

15. But then this begs the question of what exactly is the nature of their relationship? Brotherly love doesn’t fit with the flirting, so perhaps it’s a different kind of love? Some possible reasons for why Shanks would ever be flirtatious could be 1. there’s some romantic elements to their relationship in the past that he’s taking advantage of now e.g. maybe Buggy was attracted to him and he is taking advantage of it? or 2. it’s a new thing he’s trying because he thinks it’s funny and Buggy would be too confused to keep retorting so it’s a fun way to end the conversation and at the same time to plant a seed in the clown that might make him follow Shanks later? (Buggy did immediately think about doing that lololol) Is this Shanks’ way of getting Buggy to come back to him lmao without explicitly asking loooool

16. Judging by Buggy’s reaction it seems like number 2 is more likely but this is all anime-only afaik

17. All in all, I feel like Buggy is a special person to Shanks and vice versa, and even though Buggy is just one element of a much bigger picture for Shanks (whereas for Buggy, Shanks seems to have a much bigger presence in his mind), the fact that they spent their childhood only having each other as peers enabled them to form a deep mutual trust and closeness that didn’t seem to have dampened after twenty odd years of separation.

#buggy x shanks #one piece #shuggy #buggy/shanks #shanks/buggy #shanks x buggy #my take on their relationship lol #one piece buggy #buggy the clown #captain buggy #red haired shanks #red-haired shanks #one piece shanks #shanks #buggy d clown #buggy senpai

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milk-addicc · 4 years

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I really liked that post you made about how Capcom feels about Narumitsu. And I'm wondering how do you think they feel about Narumayo? Personally to me it feels like they throw more hints at Narumitsu since with the other one if Takami wanted it to be canon he would of done it at the end of T&T. I also think the team could of made it more obvious in SoJ with Maya's big return but I never really saw the hints but I know I'm biased lol.

oh i’m glad you like my rambles haha;;

ahh... that ship,

well first, about the whole Takumi “wanting narumitsu to be canon” thing, its not exactly making them canon but have more fanservice leaning heavy towards narumitsu (which was declined by the director(?) who claimed, i sorta agree with, that the game did well even without the narumitsu hinting since in the first game they didn’t have that intention and it was pure coincidence that their relationship was just THAT deep and meaningful which is incredible lmao, Takumi and co managed to slip his warning and still put at least some of the hints in TT tho hhh-). so even then, i doubt the crew actually want the endgame to come so soon hh.

okay, back on topic. what i think about naru//mayo? yea, i’m not keen on that ship personally at all, actually i despise it. like, they first met in the office, in front of their dead loved one, Mia. Maya was 17, Phoenix was 24. you have Maya, who’s supposedly still in HIGH SCHOOL and Phoenix, who has GRADUATED COLLEGE, has a JOB, and most likely has PAID HIS OWN BILLS. from that point alone, it should already feel weird.

Maya’s an adolescence, a teenager, she just lost her sister and barely grew up, in a way she’s still innocent, notice how she tend to ask random questions and or say things that she thinks makes sense or amusing, she tends to be naive too. its kinda like.. a child.

and Phoenix on the other hand, is a grown man. heck even Maya says he’s an “old fart”, they’re legit aware of their own age gap in game and outright say it. if anything, they both act like self-aware best friends/brother-sister than romantically. even Maya said it herself, she wants to be a good big sister for Pearl and Nick.

now how about we ignore this obvious fact just for a little while and try to see it from only their interactions in-franchise. heres the kicker, you may not see it in game since they only lightly nudges about this ship (usually with Pearl, and was dismissed by Maya right after.), but in some of AA spin off mangas (and from what i heard, one of the stage shows), for some reason, this ship has their own hints despite being completely aware that Maya is a teenager.

but its okay now don’t hold your breaths,

their “hints” are more of a one-off ish thing, most of the time a gag and not taken seriously, and unlike other ship per say narumitsu, where it actually affects their lives and changed it forever IN-GAME. “i care about Maya and understands her” and “i became an attorney because of you, Edgeworth and i don’t have any regrets” are both literally incomparable, especially given Phoenix and Edgeworth’s history together in-game canon.

anyway, here’s some common arguments i’ve encountered about this particular ship :

“but Phoenix cares about Maya a lot! he literally went through a trial against a hitman and run through a burning bridge for her!”

“Phoenix blushed and goes red when Pearl says he’s Maya’s special someone and he stutters!”

“Well my parents had a huge age gap!"

“well, Maya is 18 in AA2″

“considering Maya is a christmas cake now, Nick better tap that”

“she’s an adult in AA6 tho”

now lets dissect each of these,

yes, Phoenix cares about Maya a lot he literally did cross a burning bridge for her but people seem to forget that this is the same man who turned his life around, abandon his dreams, study law for four years, and became an attorney to meet one man and willing to defend a girl who looks like his psychotic ex that nearly poisoned him in court. he literally would believe in his clients’s innocence no matter what, he’s by nature would sacrifice anything and even his life for someone. so its normal that he cares about Maya, but is it romantic? i doubt it, he cares about her safety and well being but does it have to be a romantic hint? no, of course not, he’s just very selfless for the people he cares about and Maya has no one to help her but Nick when she’s in trouble, he’s one of few adults she can trust and will help her out.

oh so blushing and stuttering due to embarrassment means having feelings now? and about the stuttering, he literally stutters around Edgeworth a lot lol. i’m starting to feel like people ships naru//mayo not because of their depth but because Pearl said so. Pearl finds them should be together and keep shoving the audience with Nick being “Mystic Maya’s special someone”, well if thats the case, they also explained why this happened, in-game. Pearl grew up very sheltered and among unhealthy marriages she just assumes a girl and a boy together means they’re dating and being “special someones”. she most likely just wants her cousin to be in a happy relationship unlike her parents where her father left both her and her mother but didn’t know any better because she was eight years old.

https://youtu.be/FGAqQkMEKNs?start=674&end=776

now about the parent thing and taking it personal, well my parents too had a huge age-gap of 7 years. but how come is it okay? its because they met when my mum was already a career woman at 26. she’s already an adult when my dad met her. what does this mean? it means my parents were both adults when they’re together, this is why i still like GumMaggey despite their age gap so wide, they first met when Maggey has already had a career, supposedly in her 20′s, she’s a young adult, she can buy alcohol by herself, already knows whats right and wrong and has live life independently, not a still hormonal teenager who depends on one adult figure. did your parents date when your mum is in highschool while your dad is like in his mid 20′s? sorry to hear that.

as for the last three arguments, i don’t even want to touch any of them with a five-foot pole. are you listening to yourself? do you not feel like you’re a creep typing that?

let me give you a benefit of the doubt. yes she’s older and legally an adult, but are you really discrediting the fact they met when Maya was still in highschool? they met and became friends when she’s 17 and he’s 24. sure they barely met during disbarment era, but should that change anything? why should it? how should it? like this?

“Oh this is Maya, i haven’t met her in years but boy she sure has grown up can’t wait to date her since she’s legal now.”

because thats what that argument sounds like, YIKES.

you know? if they met under a different circumstance and Maya was like 19, i’d let it go. but they didn’t, they met because of a horrible loss, Maya, still in training, 17 lost her big sister and Phoenix, a rookie, at 24 lost his mentor.

in conclusion, i don’t like naru//mayo at all

pairing them feels like pairing Edgeworth with Kay or Phoenix with Ema, just because they partnered in investigations, make playful jabs at each other, and saved each others’s lives before, people just think they like each other romantically despite their age-gap in first meetings (not to mention Kay sees Edgeworth as somewhat of a father figure, and she’s nearly 18 while Edgeworth is the same age as Phoenix). especially with how Maya, being a zoomer, calls Phoenix an “old fart” and just makes jokes about how so out-of-touch Phoenix is with the modern entertainment.

from observations, i have a huge hunch that almost all of them pair these two because :

1. Maya’s a girl protagonist so its a male protagonist x female protagonist type of deal and despise narumitsu because “yaoi”

2. AA6 she’s an adult so she’s legal which is damn creepy on its own, or last

3. because of Pearl shipping them in game despite being an eight year old and was so sheltered she thought a man and a woman being next to each other means they’re special someones.

either way, i only see them as best friends, sibling-like relationship with self awareness here and there since they tease the audience a lot with their gag “hints” in spin-off mangas and game.

not only that, it kinda showcase how all male/female bond don’t have to be romantic, they can be just friends or familial and still hang together. another plus for the franchise right after encouraging moving on from ex partners. *glancing at Phoenix//Iris*

and as to the people who pairs this for some odd reasons, sometimes i just want to ask these questions,

“how would you feel if you’re in Phoenix’s shoes? met your mentor’s little sister at age 17 while you’re 24, would you feel romantically interested in this high schooler?” because i don’t, to me anyone 3 years younger than me is like a baby, how would Phoenix feel when Maya’s 7 years younger?

“also... why even? narumitsu and other less questionable pairings are RIGHT THERE in the open!”

but oh well people can like and pair whatever hhh,

and there you have it, my even longer rambling hahaha sorry;;

Edit : To add the final nail to the coffin, Phoenix outright has said that Maya’s like his kid, like a niece.

Edit 2 : remember that this is simply my personal take, you can somewhat use this to make yourself feel better about your pair nor simply just to hate on the ship itself but do not use this to dictate actual people what to ship and not to ship.

please don’t be destructive towards others.

#NOT n*rumayo #notp #naru//mayo #can't ship them sorry #im almost 20 and everyone 3 years younger feels like a child #imagine being phoenix and knowing maya is like 7 years younger jfc #slight #narumitsu #encouragement lol #dont harrass the shippers of it please

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yellowcanna · 4 years

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The ZhongXiao Alliance

Summary:

“You requested the bard to get you porn?” Diluc questioned with a skeptical look on his face.

“No!” Aether shouted, waving his hands frantically in front of him. “It’s for…for Paimon!”

“WHAT?!” Paimon screamed off the top of her lungs before spinning around to see the pair of crimson eyes narrowing at her while the blue one twinkled with amusement.

"So he says." Kaeya gestured to the Honourary Knight.

“No! Paimon would never read these kinds of things! It’s adeptus Xiao!!”

“An adeptus from Liyue want you two to get porn?” The disbelief in the tavern owner’s voice was clear.

“This is all for Morax’s sake!” Venti pipped up from behind Aether, as if that would make the situation any better.

“Oh? Morax?” The Cavalry Captain raised a brow. "So it is the Geo Archon that wanted the porn?”

Aether buried his face into his hands. He should have never taken up on Xiao's request. No, before that, he shouldn't have taken Zhongli's request.

This whole mess started when Zhongli confessed to Xiao in the wrong order, starting with sex.

Now, it's up to one traveller, one emergency food, and one bard to make things right...by getting Xiao a guide to sexual intercourse.

Rating: 18+

Genre: Mutual pining, comedy, miscommunication, romantic fluff, smut, yaoi

Pairing: Main Zhongli/Xiao, side Aether/Venti, hint of Kaeya/Diluc and Xingqiu/Chongyun

Story type: Multi-chapter

Beta’d by: Amberowl123

中文 Chinese Translation available by: Yejet

╔ ✦✧✦ ═════════════╗

Available on AO3!!

╚═════════════ ✦✧✦ ╝

◅ PREV MAIN NEXT ▻

CHAPTER 2 - ZhongXiao Alliance, Book!

“Eleven…twelve…thirteen…” Aether counted, carefully plucking the Cecilias and adding them to the basket in his hand.

“Aether! I got five more!” Paimon waved, flying back with an armful of Cecilias.

“Thanks, Paimon!” Aether smiled, plucking two more Cecilias while Paimon added her flowers into the basket. “Perfect, that’s all the flowers!”

“Great! Let’s go back to Mondstadt! Maybe the tone-deaf bard got the thing already!”

“You’re pretty optimistic about that.” The blond raised a brow at her.

“Well…as long as it’s not us who need to find it! That tone-deaf bard seems oddly familiar with these things, don’t you think?”

Aether couldn’t argue Paimon there. Venti was strangely at ease—confident even—when he told them he’d get them the porn. Though Venti was over two thousand years old, and so was Xiao. Perhaps it was due to their long lifespan that they no longer feel embarrassed over things like that?

When the blond thought of it that way, he found himself to be quite immature. If he thought over a bit more, the book was—as Xiao had said—study materials, right? Maybe he and Paimon were the ones over exaggerating and over complicating things.

With that mindset, Aether and Paimon left Starsnatch Cliff. The journey back to Mondstadt took about two hours. By the time they arrived, the sun had already set and the city was quiet compared to the lively nights at Liyue Harbour.

The two headed straight for Angel’s Share where there were already customers seated around on the tables outside, gulping down their drinks. The blond and Paimon greeted some familiar faces before grabbing the door handle and stepping inside the tavern Venti had told them to meet him at.

The first thing the two were greeted with was the sight of Diluc’s irritated face, Kaeya’s amused look, and Venti who was grinning from ear to ear.

“Aha! You see? I’m not lying!” Venti announced, pointing towards Aether who was frozen at the doorway. The blond wondered if it was too late to close the door and pretended that he was never here.

“What’s going on?” Paimon asked, looking between the two men and the archon.

“You’ve joined us at the right time,” Kaeya waved his hand lightly for them to come over.

Having no choice, Aether walked over to them despite his instincts screaming at him to leave. “What happened?” He asked and he swore he saw Diluc’s brows twitched.

What in the world did Venti do this time?

Venti, receiving Aether’s questioning look, shrugged. “Well, Master Diluc, Sir Kaeya and I were just talking about… aesthetics.”

“We were discussing your questionable performance,” Diluc corrected. Even though his voice was even, Aether could tell the man was this close to tossing the bard outside.

“What part of my performance was questionable?” Venti argued back, clearly seeing no wrong in whatever he did. Worried a fight might break out, Aether hurried to step between them.

“The part where you requested the customers to pay you with porn.”

The blond tripped over his feet, his face smashing against the hard wooden floor and his body drawing a line between Venti and Diluc.

“Aether! Are you alright?” Paimon flew over to Aether who had a hand over his reddened nose.

“Hey, I was doing our Honorary Knight a favour! You wouldn’t want to deprive Mondstadt’s saviour his needs, would you?”

Both Diluc and Kaeya looked down at Aether—crimson and blue eyes staring at him skeptically.

“You requested the bard get you porn?” Diluc questioned with an unreadable look on his face.

“No!” Aether shouted, bouncing back onto his feet at the accusation while waving his hands frantically in front of him. “Well, I mean, yes, I did ask, but it’s not for me!”

“Then who is it?” Kaeya inquired with one hand resting on his hip.

The blond’s brain was a mess as he tried to think of what to say. There was no way he could tell them that it was Xiao who wanted the book! He was an adeptus, after all. He also couldn’t say it was for a friend since that would sound like a poor excuse! “It’s for…for Paimon!”

“WHAT?!!” Paimon shouted off the top of her lungs before spinning around to see Diluc raising a brow at her while Kaeya let out a small hum.

“I must say, I would never have expected that from you,” the knight commented with an odd smile on his lips.

“No! It’s not for Paimon!” Paimon shrieked. “Paimon would never read these kinds of things! It’s for Adeptus Xiao!!”

Aether covered his hands over his face, unable to watch the mess unfold.

“An adeptus from Liyue wanted you two to get porn?” The disbelief in Diluc’s voice was clear.

“This is all for Morax’s sake!” Venti piped up from behind Aether, as though that would make the situation any better.

“Morax?” Diluc frowned. “Didn’t the Geo Archon die?”

“Uh…!” Both Aether and Paimon paled.

“Are you suggesting that not only is the Geo Archon not dead, he asked you to get porn?” Kaeya pushed on.

“I…!” Aether looked between the two men, feeling completely trapped with no way out.

“This isn’t the place to talk,” Diluc gestured for them to follow and brought them to the basement where they stored the wine. He shot more than a couple of nasty glares when Venti’s hands wandered too close to some of the wine.

Once they were inside one of the storage rooms, Diluc slammed the door shut and turned to Aether with his arms crossed over his chest. “Explain.”

Having, no choice, Aether began to explain the mess they were dragged into—including the fact that the Geo Archon was very much alive. The blond knew he could trust both Kaeya and Diluc to keep it a secret…perhaps that was also why Venti casually revealed the Geo Archon being alive.

“So Rex Lapis is alive and he has fallen in love with one of the immortals of Liyue,” Kaeya muttered after hearing the full story. “Most interesting indeed.”

“And that adeptus requested you bring…research materials.” Diluc pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a quiet sigh. While he fully understood the situation, he didn’t look any happier than when Aether first saw him.

“Now that we've gotten this misunderstanding out of the way, can I get my books back?” Venti asked with his hands on his hips.

“So…what exactly happened?” Paimon asked again.

“As usual, the audiences loved performances and kindly gifted me their valuable collections, but they were all confiscated by Master Diluc here.”

“You should be glad I didn’t kick you out of the tavern.” Diluc retorted.

“Wait, so you really did get a book?!” Paimon turned to Venti in shock.

“Of course! I did promise I’ll help you guys find one, didn’t I?” Venti bragged and looked back to Diluc.

“What about Kaeya?” Aether turned to the Cavalry Captain. “Why were you here?”

“As one of the Knights of Favonius, it is my duty to oversee regulations. I can’t turn a blind eye to shady dealings now, can I?” Kaeya shrugged.

“How was any of that shady?!” Venti gasped in genuine shock.

“Even if you are lord Barbatos, there are still laws you have to follow.”

“Surely a book or two isn’t that big of a deal!”

“You are correct. A book or two is not a big deal, but…” Kaeya trailed off, his eye shifting to Diluc. Diluc spared a small glimpse at Kaeya before sharply turning away. He looked a little irritated, but stepped out of the storage room and returned a minute later carrying a large bundle wrapped in a tablecloth.

The moment the redhead set the bundle onto the floor, the cloth unwrapped, revealing stacks after stacks of books.

“Don’t tell me—!!” Aether’s jaw fell open at the mountain of porn.

“Did you rob the entire city?!” Paimon shouted.

“Of course not! These were all gifted to me by my faithful fans!”

“So now you see.” Kaeya bent down, picking up a blank cover book and waved it at Aether. “When a large quantity of these suddenly turned up at a tavern, that is something a knight cannot ignore.”

“We’re very sorry!” Aether apologized immediately. He was never so glad that it was Kaeya who caught Venti and not Jean, Lisa or Amber. Aether would never be able to face them again if they were to find out.

“Morax’s happiness is on the line here! Can’t you cut us some slack?” Venti tried to bargain.

“You say that you only need one book, didn’t you?” Diluc finally spoke up. “Take one and return the rest to wherever they came from. That should be fine, shouldn’t it, Knight of Favonius?”

“Certainly,” Kaeya easily agreed.

“Thank you so much, Diluc! Kaeya!” Aether and Paimon cheered while Venti looked disappointed.

“Aww, I have to give all of these back?” He looked at them with teary eyes.

“Were you planning on doing anything with them?” Diluc’s sharp gaze was immediately locked onto the Anemo god.

“Of course not!” Venti laughed before glancing down at the pile of books, then to Aether. “So…which one shall we take?”

“Wouldn’t any one of them work?” Aether asked in confusion.

“Hmm, take this for example!” Venti held out two books. “One is about a woman and a man, while the other is about two men. Which one does Xiao need?”

“O-of course it’s…!!” Aether stammered, taking a look at Diluc and Kaeya before quickly hissing out the last part. “That second one!”

“Then does he want a book with words, or pictures?”

“Huh?”

“Are there any specific positions they want to do it in?”

“T-that’s—!!”

“And what kind of kinks do they—”

“Just something educational!” Aether frantically shouted to stop Venti from talking. He felt like he was going to die from embarrassment at this rate.

When he turned to look at the other two men, he saw Diluc with one hand covering his face while Kaeya was smiling weirdly at him.

Someone let him die.

“Guess we have no choice but to look through them all!”

“How did you reach that conclusion?!” Aether’s shout was so high that his voice ended up cracking.

At this point, Diluc had finally had enough and headed for the door.

“Oh? Are you not going to help our Honorary Knight with his troubles?” Kaeya watched the Pyro user open the door.

“Unlike someone who has too much time on their hands, I have a business to run,” the redhead stated before disappearing into the hallway. The knight chuckled and followed after Diluc. On his way out, the knight grabbed Paimon by her scarf, plucking her off the air and bringing her with him.

“Hey!!” Paimon shouted, kicking and throwing her arms around, but her limbs were too short to reach the man.

“It would be best if you wait for them upstairs. Seems like they will take a while,” Kaeya said, giving the blond a wink and closed the door behind him.

Aether was blushing hard, but Venti was already ushering for him to sit down so they could start looking through the books together.

“Hey Aether, look at this one!” Venti cheerfully opened one of the illustrated Inazuma scrolls right in his face, giving the boy a clear picture of the indecent act being performed…with an octopus.

Aether had to use all of his will power not to scream.

Why was there an octopus?!

“It got an octopus in it!”

“I can see that?! You don’t need to show it to me!!” Aether cried, swatting the scroll away from his face.

“You have such a pure-hearted~” Venti giggled, rolling up the scroll and setting it aside. “Alright, I won’t tease you anymore. Let’s start looking for something you can give to Xiao.”

Aether nodded, still red in the face as he picked up the book closest to him. Since all of these covers were blank, it was hard to tell the contents without looking inside. The moment Aether opened the book, he immediately regretted it as it was a picture book.

Golden eyes rounded upon the sight of a man lying on the bed, his head thrown back with his mouth opened and eyes closed. The look on his face could only be described as ecstasy with spurts of white splattered over his body. With his legs pulled apart, Aether was given a clear view of another man’s appendage, going into the...

The blond frantically snapped the book shut, but the image was already engraved into his brain…

“There’s surprisingly a lot of novels here. Well, then again it might be not so surprising. Some nations have strict rules on the picture ones. This would be good since words can go into details of how it’s done!” Venti mumbled while scavenging through the books and oblivious to Aether’s inner terror.

“We should pick out the ones with males only and put them into a pile!”

“Uwah, this one is a bit extreme, but hey, surely that brute would be into it!”

“Hilichurl? Huh, people sure are imaginative these days.”

“Woah, a Regisvines? Wouldn’t you freeze to death? Wait…did Regisvines have tentacles like these? Oh, they’re roots…?”

“Hmm, as I thought, there’s not too many with only males—oh! Hey Aether! Look at this! This one’s from Fontaine!”

“Aha, here’s another one! Come now Aether, help me out here!”

“Aether? Are you listening?”

“Aether?”

“Aether!”

…They found a book thirteen hours later.

✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

“Are you sure you guys were finding a book and not gone off to fight monsters?” Paimon asked, hovering over Aether who was lying in the carriage with a folded cloth shielding his eyes from the morning light.

“Ehe, don’t mind him!” Venti smiled. “He’ll be fine after getting some sleep.”

“You two sure took your time! Paimon fell asleep waiting for you!”

“There were too many things to sort through. Besides,” the archon gestured to the carriage they were in. “If we didn’t take an entire night, how would we be able to hitch a ride on the Dawn Winery shipping cart that is heading to Liyue?”

“Why are you so proud when it’s Master Diluc who gave us the ride?” Paimon huffed before looking down at the book the two had taken an entire night to choose. Judging by the hardcover and the form of the book, it originated from Mondstadt. Since there wasn’t anything on the front or the back of the book, Paimon couldn’t tell what kind of content was inside.

“Soooo…” She looked up at Venti with a sly grin. “What book did you guys choose in the end?”

“Hmm, I would advise against reading it. It’s not something for the faint of heart~” Venti winked and began playing music on his lyre. Paimon puffed, but she floated down, sitting in the corner of the carriage and listened to the archon’s music.

The journey back to Liyue was peaceful. Even when there were nearby monster attacks, Diluc’s men were able to fend them off so there was no need for Venti or Aether to intervene. Because the Dawn Winery carriage was heading towards Qingce village, the three had to get off around Stone Gate and walk the rest of the way to Guili Plains.

This time, there was no need for Aether to call for Xiao. The moment they arrived at their destination, Xiao appeared in a flicker of green light.

“Lord Barbatos,” he greeted politely, nodding his head towards the Anemo Archon.

Aether and Paimon stared at Xiao, then to Venti who puffed out his chest with pride. Sometimes, they both forget that Barbatos was a huge deal due to the archon’s behaviour and the little respect the bard named Venti gets in Mondstadt…

“It’s been a long time, Xiao! Almost a millennia, I believe?” Venti greeted.

“Yes,” Xiao responded curtly. “What brought you to Liyue?”

“I ran into our dear traveller here back in Mondstadt and heard about Morax’s proposal to you, so I decided to come along!”

“I see.” The adeptus glanced to Aether. “I trust you’ve brought the items?”

“Yes, here they are.” Aether handed over the basket of Cecilias and the book.

“What are you planning on doing with those Cecilias?” Venti asked curiously.

“They are for the Cleansing pills.”

“Cleansing pills? What’s that?” Paimon inquired.

“Adepti do not indulge themselves in mortal desires,” Venti explained for the pair. “Stuff like alcohol, gambling, food, baths…things human usually need or do for pleasure! While older adepti don’t need to eat because their power is strong enough to sustain themselves, the same can’t be said for the younger ones. To prevent them from having worldly desires or cravings for things they shouldn’t, they created all kinds of special pills for convenience—like pills for hunger, pills for meditations and so on. The Cleansing pills are for when they want to wash their body. Toss one into the bathtub, dip in a viola! You’ll be clean and refreshed in no time! Pretty handy when you’re suffering from a hangover!”

“Wait, you mean they don’t need to eat at all? But Adeptus Xiao ate!” Paimon pointed at Xiao who crossed his arms over his chest and shifted his weight to his right foot.

“Eating is but a choice for us,” he said before narrowing his eyes at the wind god disapprovingly. “The Cleansing pill purifies the body and soul. It is not to be used to consume more alcohol.”

“You say the same thing as Morax,” Venti groaned. “But if I remember correctly, isn’t the Cleansing pill made with the herbs in Liyue? Why do you need Cecilias?”

“Many herbs have been lost in the flow of time and the changes within the formation of land,” Xiao replied rather patiently, to both Aether and Paimon’s surprise. “Madame Ping has informed me that the properties of Cecilia are similar to the herb I am missing.”

“Ah, Madame Ping! I haven’t seen her since I’ve last visited Liyue Harbour!” Venti nodded.

“If you’ll excuse me, I will take my leave.”

“Hey now! It’s been so long since we last spoke! Don’t be so eager to leave!” Venti hurriedly blocked Xiao’s path. “Even if you read that book, would you even know what you need to do?”

That made Xiao stop. For the first time, his emotionless mask cracked, revealing a lost look on his face as he stared at the book inside the basket of flowers.

“On the other hand, Aether and I had learned quite a lot! I’m sure we can help you with your studies!”

Aether’s head immediately snapped to Venti in disbelief. He opened his mouth to object, but Xiao beat him to it.

“I will humbly take you on your offer, lord Barbatos.”

“Wait, Adeptus Xiao, let’s not—”

“Perfect! In exchange, give us some of your Cleansing pills! Surely you’ll have extras once you are done!”

“I will only require a few. You may have the rest once I’ve refined them,” Xiao swiftly agreed.

“Wait—!”

With that, Aether was dragged away to Wangshu Inn by Venti with Xiao walking at the front and Paimon trailing behind. When the boss of Wangshu Inn saw the green-haired adeptus, she quickly organized the most luxurious room for them.

That was how Aether found himself locked within the room with one adeptus, one archon and one book between them. Paimon had slipped away at some point, no doubt stuffing her belly with food right now.

Aether was sitting there nervously, watching Xiao open the book to reveal the fine texts printed over the white pages. In the end, Aether and Venti picked out an erotic novel instead of illustrated ones. The blond had feared that the picture books would be too…too graphic for the adeptus to handle. At the very least, he couldn’t handle it, so they chose a novel instead with milder tastes.

“Start over here,” Venti told Xiao, flipping to the middle of the book where there was a red bookmark.

Xiao didn’t ask any questions and read from there. With the way those bright yellow eyes narrowed seriously and that pale hand covering his chin and mouth, Aether would think he was trying to decipher some sort of code rather than reading a sex scene.

“This doesn’t make sense,” Xiao said after only looking through the first page. “Why must you prepare the other person?”

“It’s called stretching! It’s so the person who tops could enter the person who bottoms easier!” Venti replied lightly.

“It’s muscles,” the adeptus deadpanned. “It should be the same if you relax.”

“Well, I suppose that makes sense, but it would be bad if anything tears, right?”

“Such insignificant wounds are hardly anything to mention.”

“But wouldn’t Morax mind even if there is a tiny bit of injury? He might feel responsible, you know?”

Xiao’s brow twitched, but he didn’t say anything about that anymore and moved to the next topic he couldn’t understand.

“What of this oil? What is the purpose of this?”

“It’s so your lord could go in easier and let him feel good, of course!”

Xiao nodded and went on to the next one.

Aether buried his face into his hands. After that first question, Venti has mastered the art of explaining things to Xiao—by telling him that everything was for Zhongli’s sake and how it could benefit Zhongli.

“Positions are an important part of sex!! You should let Morax see your face when you guys do it!”

“Why is that?”

“Well, surely he would want to know whether or not you are feeling good?”

“My pleasure matters not.”

“But it will to Morax! His pride will be hurt if you don’t feel good! That’s the same as saying he's bad lay!”

“A bad what?”

“It means you think he’s impotent~”

“…!!”

Aether’s golden eyes shifted to Xiao who looked as though he had swallowed a whole Electro slime, then to Venti who was smiling way too brightly than he should in such a situation. It was obvious that the archon was enjoying this way too much and Xiao was too clueless to see it.

The blond weighed the pros and cons of intervening before deciding to keep his mouth shut. While Aether never had any sexual experiences, reading porn and erotic novels for thirteen hours straight gave him some…insight to things. Even if Venti was seemingly playing around with Xiao, the Anemo Archon was in fact giving Xiao the best advice that could bring him and Zhongli closer together.

“There are also techniques you must master! You also need to know what Morax’s kinks are.”

“…Kinks?” Xiao frowned, clearly not understanding the definition of the word.

Aether’s mouth fell open, gawking at Venti like he had grown a second head.

And so, Venti began a list of every kink that was possible to mankind. Some of which Aether saw in the stacks of porn, but most he never even heard of and was certain the god was making this up as he went!

By the end of Venti’s long rambling, Aether’s jaw was pretty much touching the floor and Xiao…

Xiao was shaking with long bangs falling over his face. With his head dipped low, the blond couldn’t see what expression he has right now.

“I have no idea…that this requires so much skill…!!” Xiao whispered before promptly getting up. “I must request my lord to reconsider. As I am now, I can’t possibly be his partner.”

“Wait! Wait, Adeptus Xiao!” Aether jumped up—or at least, he tried. Distracted by Venti’s rambling, he didn’t even realize how numb his legs were and he ended up smacking into the floor with his hands grabbing onto Xiao’s ankle.

It was a good thing Xiao had stopped when he called out, otherwise Aether can’t imagine what would become of him if he made the adeptus fall flat on his face.

“You haven’t finished the book yet! Why don’t you look through the book first?”

Xiao considered the traveller’s words for a moment before he sat back down and picked up the book once more. Aether secretly let out a small breath of relief before shooting the god an accusing look. Venti responded with a guilty smile while scratching the back of his head, knowing he went overboard. Although the bard didn’t think he was wrong. Who knew what sort of weird kinks that old grandpa would develop after over two thousand years of yearning?

Now that he wasn’t asking questions every other sentence he encountered, Xiao’s reading speed increased a lot. In no time at all, he finished the sex scene and the milder contents inside calmed him greatly.

“I’m sure all those—erm, kinks that Venti mentioned don’t apply to Zhongli.” Aether made sure to shoot another look at Venti. “At least, I don’t think he would want to be tied up and lick your feet or make you lick his feet.”

“I have no issue if my lord asks me to lick his feet,” the Yaksha responded with absolute seriousness. “It’s…I cannot imagine making…making him…” The thought was so terrifying to Xiao that he couldn’t even finish the sentence.

“No, they are equally bad!” Aether wanted to crack open the adeptus’ skull to see what was inside that head of his!! In fact, he also wanted to crack open Venti’s! What in the world was the archon thinking trying to stuff these ideas to Xiao knowing he’ll take them seriously?!

“Calm down, Aether. You’re gonna burst a vein,” Venti laughed and Aether briefly entertained himself with the idea of throwing Wei—the stray cat at the front counter—at the cat-allergic god.

He can’t rely on Venti anymore, so he needed to do this by himself.

“Adeptus Xiao, has Zhongli ever given you anything?”

“The medicine you delivered to me was from him, was it not?” Xiao asked back.

“Well, yeah, but has he given anything that was…infused with his power?”

“…He has.”

“What was it?!” Aether’s reaction was a bit over the top, but he couldn’t help it. With so many things going on, he felt like he was going to die from a headache if he didn’t get one thing sorted out.

Instead of replying, Xiao held out his hand and his weapon materialized within his palm.

This was the first time Aether has seen Xiao's weapon, yet the moment he laid eyes upon it, he found himself thinking how there was no weapon in this world better suited for Xiao than this. The spear in Xiao's hand was by far the most beautiful spear Aether has ever seen. The weapon had an elegant emerald body with the bright green spearhead crafted from the finest jade. There were fix smaller jades—three on each side—spreading out like wings. Even without touching it, the blond could feel power radiating from the weapon much like its wielder.

“Ah, the Primordial Jade Winged-Spear!” Venti immediately recognized the weapon. He then turned to the clueless blond and explained, “it’s a weapon Morax made for Xiao. During the archon war, there was not a single god who did not know of Xiao and the spear he wielded. This close up, I can certainly feel Morax’s energy flowing within.”

“Aside from this, was there anything else Zhongli had given you?” Aether asked. A very bad feeling was creeping up on him, but he didn’t want to believe it…

“No,” the adeptus replied with absolute certainty, crushing what little hope Aether had left.

The last bit of energy left the blond, but he slammed his palms into the floor, stubbornly hanging onto his sanity.

One mystery was now solved.

The gift Zhongli mentioned…it was definitely this Primordial Jade Winged-Spear.

The courting gift Zhongli had given Xiao was a weapon…and of all times he gave it to him, it had to be during a war?!

How could anyone not misunderstand?!

“T-then did Zhongli say anything when he gave that to you?” Aether asked in his last attempt of struggle.

“He said he hoped I would accept,” Xiao’s gaze was distant as he remembered the past. “That was the day, I devoted myself to serving him.”

THUD

“…What are you doing?” Xiao frowned at the human lying on the floor.

“Eh…his legs must be numbed. Humans tend to have this issue when they sit too long, don’t mind him!” Venti waved and picked up the erotic novel. “Let’s continue!”

Xiao nodded and the two went back to discussing the book, ignoring the worldly-outlander slowly withering away on the floor.

✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

“Hold on…you’re saying that the gift Zhongli gave Adeptus Xiao was his weapon and when he said he hoped Adeptus Xiao would accept…Adeptus Xiao misunderstood it as Zhongli asking if he would serve under him?!”

Aether hid his face behind his hands. Hearing Paimon repeated everything in his head out loud made the situation even more ridiculous.

After getting down the basics of how intercourse works, Xiao needed to work on making the Cleansing pills and left the inn, telling them to come back after three days to give them their portion of the pills.

So now they were back at Liyue Harbour, strolling around the streets since the last time Venti visited Liyue was centuries ago. The archon was running around the street, taking in the sights of the city while Aether explained the situation to Paimon.

“As I thought, this is all Morax’s fault,” Venti sighed all too happily, coming back with a steam bun in hand. “I figured that blundering buffoon couldn’t do a proper confession, but to think it would be to this extent.”

“Where did you get that steam bun?” Paimon asked, knowing full well the archon had no Mora on him.

“The old lady at the stall was nice enough to give me one after listening to one of my stories!” Venti took a bite into the hot bun and let out a satisfied hum. “Hmm! It’s been so long since I’ve tasted Liyue’s delicacies.”

Seeing the joy on the god’s face, Aether couldn’t help but smile and said, “let’s go to Wanmin Restaurant. We can talk while we eat there.”

“Now you’re talking Paimon’s language!” Paimon cheered. “Maybe Xiangling would be there!”

“Oho, I have heard of the name Xiangling. She is quite famous!” Venti nodded, taking another bite of his bun. “Ah, by the way…does this restaurant have any alcohol?”

“I’m sure they do, but…” Aether wanted to point out how none of them looked to be of legal drinking age, but Venti waved him off.

“Come on, you need to learn to live a little or you’ll end up becoming one of those block of rocks that can’t—”

“Oh? That can’t what?” A deep voice came from behind them, causing Venti to turn into the very stone he was mocking.

“Zhongli!” Aether turned to see Zhongli standing behind them with his arms crossed over his chest and those Cor Lapis coloured eyes glaring down at a certain archon.

“Aah, if it isn’t my dear old friend!!” Venti’s tune immediately changed as he spun on his heels and greeted his old friend. “I heard you’re going by the name of Zhongli now, yes? How is the life of retirement fairing for you?”

“How about we talk somewhere less conspicuous?” Zhongli suggested, though he wasn’t talking to Venti, but at Aether and Paimon.

They ended up booking a private room at the Liuli Pavilion with Venti and Zhongli listing out their orders to the waitress. Aether could already hear the sound of Mora leaving his wallet because there was no way these two broke gods would be able to afford any of it.

Once their meals were brought up, the waitresses closed the door on their way out, giving them full privacy. Finally, Aether found the opportunity to speak. He decided to start by telling Zhongli about Xiao asking for him to wait a week—or if he was to count the days that were already lost, to wait for five more days.

“I see,” Zhongli said with a small smile on his lips. “You have my thanks.”

“No, we uh, still haven’t figured out what he likes yet,” Aether said guiltily. To be honest, he had completely forgotten about that part with the porn and everything else going on.

“Wouldn’t anything be fine? That child is blindly devoted to you,” Venti chipped in from the sideline, but was ignored by Zhongli completely.

“It’s alright if you cannot find out. I know that it is difficult to get him to talk about himself.” Zhongli said with a soft sigh. “I have tried in the past, but he never gives me his opinion and only agrees with everything I say…”

“So that’s why you wanted us to ask!” Paimon gasped, finally understanding.

“What did I say? Blind devotion,” Venti lamented.

It was then that Zhongli finally spared some of his time to the other god. “Barbatos, why are you here?”

“Can’t I visit an old friend?” The Anemo Archon blinked those large, forest green eyes innocently.

“Venti was helping us gather some materials for Adeptus Xiao.” Aether quickly explained, not wanting Zhongli to think Venti was here to meddle.

“Materials?”

“Your little Xiao is refining some Cleansing pills so he asked our dear friend here to get some from Mondstadt.”

“Then he must have needed the Cecilias,” Zhongli nodded in understanding. “I should have told him I have already prepared the Cleansing pills. That is an oversight on my part.”

“He just started. We can tell him that you already have it prepared?” Aether offered.

“No, that’s alright.” Zhongli shook his head lightly. “I am happy that Xiao is taking the initiative. Traditionally, it is the one that proposed the courting be responsible for the preparations.”

That’s because he had no idea he was being courted—Aether wanted to say, but held himself back.

“What kind of preparations?” Paimon questioned with a tilt of her head.

“You know how male birds attract female birds by being pretty and all?” Venti cut in when Zhongli parted his lips to respond. “They must also build a nest and prepare the food. If the female likes the home they made, they stay with the male!”

“Barbatos,” Zhongli’s tone dropped and he glared at the other god. “Do not compare the courtship of adepti to that of animals.”

“Aren’t you all closer to animals than humans anyway? And besides, Xiao’s technically a bird.”

“Comparing Xiao to a bird is a grave insult. You say this knowing I am in the middle of courtship with him. Are you testing my patience?”

“I would never! I simply thought our friends here would understand better if I explain it that way!” Venti countered.

“Do not believe in this bard’s nonsense,” Zhongli said to Aether and Paimon. “The act of intimacy is important within our courting traditions. It is the first exchange of our adeptial powers, one cannot take it lightly. Therefore, it must be located in a place where we cannot be disturbed.”

“So…like a vacation home?” Paimon summarized.

“Yes, you can say that.”

“A vacation home…” Aether perked up when an idea popped into his head. “Zhongli, do you already have a place prepared?”

“Yes, I am thinking of Jueyun Karst. It is the only place with few mortals thus we would not be disturbed. I have already informed the adepti living there of this matter.” Zhongli paused when he saw the disappointment on Aether’s face. “Do you perhaps have an idea?”

“Oh no, if you already prepared it then it’s alright!”

“Plans can always change. I want to hear your thoughts on the matter.”

“Well, it didn’t seem like Adeptus Xiao have a home like the other adepti. Even when we sit down to talk, it’s at Wangshu Inn. I thought it would be nice if he could have his own place.” The blond said, scratching his cheeks. When he looked up to Zhongli, the archon was sitting there, staring at him with his eyes wide.

“Yes…that is…” Zhongli mumbled to himself before bringing a hand up to cover his mouth. “It has been a long time since…perhaps now…”

“Uh, Zhongli?” Aether called, successfully snapping Zhongli back to reality.

“My apologies,” the man heaved out a deep breath. “It is only natural you do not know of this, but the Wangshu Inn is established for the purpose of supporting Xiao.”

“Eh?! What do you mean?” Paimon flew up from her seat.

“The Wangshu Inn is created by a secret organization within the Qixing. To be precise, it started with an agent, but it grew and expanded into an organization over time.”

“Then the boss of the Wangshu Inn…” Aether trailed off, remembering the woman always sitting behind the front counter. Now that he thought about it, there was always something strange about her…like how casual she was when mentioning Xiao and even took in ghosts that Xiao brought over.

“If you are referring to Verr Goldet, her real allegiance is to that organization within the Qixing.”

“And the Almond Tofu that Adeptus Xiao loves to eat?!” Paimon gasped.

“The Almond Tofu is also created for Xiao,” Zhongli answered.

“Let me guess, that agent that started the whole thing was you, Morax?” Although it was a question, there was a knowing look on Venti’s face as he grinned at his fellow archon.

“I will not deny my involvement, but the Wangshu Inn is the result of the people’s gratitude towards Xiao.”

“And of course, Xiao is oblivious to all that~” The Anemo Archon sighed wistfully.

“He doesn’t know?!” Paimon stared at Zhongli with wide eyes.

“If he finds out the truth behind Wangshu Inn, he will not go there anymore.” The Geo Archon had a troubled look on his face. “He is a stubborn one and does not easily accept help from others. That is why you must keep this a secret.”

“Of course! Paimon will never tell anyone!”

“Your secret’s safe with us.” Aether nodded.

Then, the two turned towards Venti who straightened under their gaze. “Why are you two looking at me like that? You think I would tattle?”

“True…the tone-deaf bard may be annoying at times, but he can keep a secret!”

“Thank you for your compliments,” the god chuckled.

“Since he got a place already, I guess there’s no need for a home, huh?” Aether laughed lightly.

“Not necessarily. You have given me a better idea.” Zhongli looked at the blond gratefully. “I cannot thank you enough.”

“Oh…I’m glad I could help?”

“I have one more favour to ask of you.”

“What is it?” Aether asked rather cautiously. He couldn’t help it, not after what Xiao asked them to do…

“You say that Xiao is refining the Cleansing pills right now?”

“Yeah, he told us to come back in three days and he’ll give some to us!” Paimon beamed. Even if it wasn’t Mora, it was still a reward for their efforts. Besides, if it was something made by an adeptus, surely it would sell for a hefty price!

“Three days…that leaves two,” Zhongli muttered. “That is plenty enough time. I want to ask you to lure Xiao away from Guili Plains for the remainder of those two days. Preferably somewhere up north—around Qingce village. ”

“But…would he leave with us?” Aether frowned. The whole reason Xiao spoke to them in the first place was because they were delivering his medicine and that he needed their help. As for their time at Wangshu Inn…that was because of Venti. If not for the Anemo Archon, Aether doubted that he would be able to convince the Yaksha to go anywhere with him.

Zhongli was conflicted as well. He knew that his request this time was too much to ask of the traveller. Even he couldn’t think of any convincing ways for them to get Xiao to leave the plains he dwelled upon for so long.

“Ahem!” Venti cleared his throat, letting his presence be remembered. “Might I offer a solution to that? Of course, it will come with a small price~”

“I will give you three gallons of the finest Osmanthus wine in Liyue.” Zhongli was quick to take up the bard’s offer. Putting their many disagreements aside, Venti was still an archon and the one who gave Xiao his Vision. The younger god may be childish, a drunkard, slacks off from his duties and overall a disgrace to the arts…but he was an old friend Zhongli could rely on when push comes to shove.

“Deal!” Venti chirped, snatching up a Lotus Flower Crisp and bit off the fluffy pastry petal.

Aether smiled and raised his chopsticks. “Well then, let’s eat before the food gets cold.”

“Finally!” Paimon let out an exaggerated sigh, picking up her plate and chopsticks with her eyes sparkling as she gazed upon the food. Zhongli let out a small chuckle and joined in as well.

At that time, Aether had no idea what sort of disaster his innocent suggestion was about to bring to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, the adepti and the Treasure Hoarders located in Guili Plains.

Likewise, he was also oblivious to the new hell that awaited him at Qingce village…

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translations-by-aiimee · 3 years

Text

Dig a Grave to Dig Out a Ghost - Chapter 24

Original Title: 挖坟挖出鬼

Genres: Drama, Horror, Mystery, Supernatural, Yaoi

This translation is based on multiple MTLs and my own limited knowledge of Chinese characters. If I have made any egregious mistakes, please let me know.

Chapter Index

Chapter 24 - Inside Story

"Sorry." Lin Yan mumbled to the boy's back. He wasn't sure why. No one could see Xiao Yu, which always made him a little anxious. Lin Yan hesitated and for the first time took the initiative to reach out and touch Xiao Yu's statue-like fingers and whispered, "It's lonely, isn't it? Of all the people in the world, I'm the only one who can see you and I treat you badly."

Lin Yan stared at the endless highway outside the window and sighed: "Sometimes I think that, if a person walks down the street but seems invisible, desperately waving and no one responds, desperately shouting and no one hears, this feeling will definitely drive a person crazy. When I sit alone in the study room, I often feel that everyone’s excitement has nothing to do with me. I can’t wait to rush into the crowd and shout that I’m dying alone. If there is a person, no matter who he is, just that he's willing to listen to me patiently, I would have held on to him with a death grip; a sad, loving and even desperate grip."

"But I can't tell anyone. No one wants to admit that they're lonely. They always put on a show to satisfy their pride. They show off their awesome life to others while crying behind closed doors. People are such strange creatures."

Xiao Yu lowered his eyes and grabbed Lin Yan's hand. He put it to his lips and kissed lightly, as if comforting.

Lin Yan turned his head silently. The children at the snack bar were making noise, and the street shop windows were covered with small heart-shaped papers of various colours. Lin Yan looked through a few of them, and some of them were written in highlighter about who they love and who they're waiting for. Some wrote blessings to pass the exam. They were notes of immaturity and youthfulness, the purest and most beautiful wishes.

Everyone had their own wish, whether it was simple or complicated. Their dissatisfaction with their lives making them write out their wishes on paper, hoping that one day the gods can see them. Lin Yan thought silently, people who don't know each other always shine brightly, but only when they are familiar with them do they know their weaknesses. Just look at him, his family was well-off and well educated, but he had never dared to admit that he didn't like girls; look at Yin Zhou, he's from a perfect family but only willing to be a prince in the virtual world; then there's A-Yan, who can't even be a normal person in the eyes of others. Lin Yan gave a wry smile, who would listen to their prayers?

Probably because of the high school student's whistleblower, a group of children at the next table were pointing at him. Someone said something about being a psychopath. Lin Yan smiled indifferently. He took a note from his pocket and wrote a line: "I hope I can successfully help Zhou Jintian find his father." He put the note under a piece of fluorescent paper with a heart drawn on it.

He heard about a child's wish today.

He, Yin Zhou, and A-Yan had snuck into the morgue to search for answers after finding the boy’s record. The old man at the door was basically deaf. Lin Yan yelled the three syllables of the kid's name so loudly and the old man didn’t hear him. A nurse doing some cleaning suddenly intervened and asked him if the child hadn't left yet. He put down the broom and said pitifully.

"I know that kid, his grandma and I are neighbours. His mother died a few years ago. His father was too busy with work to care for him. The child lived with his grandma. One time Jintian had a severe fever and his father came back to see him. Jintian never forgot about it. One day while his grandmother was not there, he fell off of a balcony on the third floor, thinking that his father would be able to accompany him to see a doctor if he fell. As a result, the child lived a short life. His internal organs ruptured and caused heavy bleeding, and he passed away after a few days after being sent to the hospital."

"The ashes are buried in the most expensive cemetery in our city. I went there on the day of the funeral. It's a pity that his father was on a business trip abroad. He didn't rush back to collect the body until two days after his son's death. He didn't see him in the end." The nurse sighed. "I heard that the child kept asking about why his father wasn't coming in his confusion. The doctor lied to him that he was already on his way. As a result, the child lay on the bed and looked out the window every day, and even kept his eyes open when he died."

This story made Lin Yan feel a little heartbroken, but A-Yan said that this kind of soul was easy to deal with. There was no resentment and didn't want to harm anyone. As long as he found the person he was obsessed with and burned paper in front of the grave and talked with him often, he should be gone. But the child’s ghost was the most simple and persistent. If that person didn't come, the child would turn into a grieving spirit after waiting for a long time, which was extremely difficult to deal with.

"G-Ghosts have more of a heart." A-Yan was rather lost when she said this.

Ding. Lin Yan's cell phone went off. Yin Zhou sent Zhou Mo's detailed address and contact information. He turned out to be a local, living in the most remote area of the city, about a three-hour drive away. Lin Yan swallowed the last bite of his spicy and sour noodles and threw the nuts in the soup into his mouth. He curled his lips and said to Xiao Yu: "Let's go. This time, the task is to help the kid find his father. It is much easier than dealing with you."

As he spoke, he grabbed his wrist and walked out, and couldn't help but blow a whistle and laugh as he drove, thinking that if only all the troubles were like today. No matter how bad his luck was lately, his family was always warmly affectionate.

Zhou Mo's family was at the fine line between the urban and rural areas. When he arrived at the destination indicated on his GPS, Lin Yan thought he had gone to the wrong place. In front of him was a rather imposing villa with a sign on the door of a European-style courtyard: private residence, outdoor surveillance. Lin Yan couldn't help being secretly stunned. For a man who owns such a house in this rich city, even if his child is hospitalized in the United States, he was rich enough to go back and forth every day. How could he not even get back to see his child for the last time?

He parked the car outside the courtyard. Lin Yan woke up Xiao Yu, who was dazed in the passenger seat, coaxed him and said: "I know you're upset when I drive you away, but this is something I need to do well, so don’t make trouble later, alright?" He leaned on the cushions and said casually: "I really understand the little boy's mood. When I was a child, my parents were also busy. I only go home once a week. I would cook my own food and sleep on my own. I was afraid of the dark and I always wanted my parents to suddenly come back."

"But I know my parents also missed me. Although they were busy, they didn't forget to buy a bunch of delicious foods every time they went home." Lin Yan changed his position and lay on his side, catching a strand of Xiao Yu's hair. He circled it around his fingers and said excitedly: "Although people and ghosts are different, a father-son reunion is always something to look forward to, right?"

Xiao Yu nodded. He pecked his lips on Lin Yan's face, and slowly said, "Let's go."

"Young Master Xiao, you're finally willing to talk to me. It's so hard to please you." Lin Yan muttered and opened the car door.

The owner’s yard was very delicately maintained, with various seasonal flowers in full bloom. He could smell the warm fragrance floating in the summer night while he waited outside the door. Not far away, there were many koi squeezed close to each other in a shallow pool, the sound of water splashing when they shook their heads and tails making people feel unspeakably calm and relaxed.

Lin Yan waited for a few minutes. A woman dressed as a nanny ran out of the villa and looked at him vigilantly through the hollow courtyard gate. Lin Yan explained that he had come because of Zhou Jintian, and the nanny ran back again. This time it took a full 20 minutes for the door to open. Lin Yan adjusted his shirt and walked across a path paved with pebbles. He rang the doorbell of the small building.

With a squeak, the Victorian-style heavy wooden door opened a gap, and a middle-aged man poked his head out of the door and hesitated: "You are?"

Lin Yan smiled politely: "My name is Lin Yan, a student at X University. You're Mr. Zhou, I came for your son Zhou Jintian." He said respectfully and handed over his student card. The owner checked in confusion, and after confirming that there was no problem, he opened the door a bit wider, but still had no intention of letting him in.

"My son just passed away some time ago. What do you want?"

Although it was backlit, Lin Yan still saw the typical businessman expression on the middle-aged man’s face; snobbishness, arrogance, and calculating. He only wore a purple bathrobe with a belt tied loosely around his waist. His chest was exposed and his body was slightly fat, but he could see that he had a good foundation when he was young. Now there was a bit of fat under his ears, so he didn't like to exercise, or his only exercise was golf.

A rich man covered in his armour.

"I'm sorry about your son. It's like this. I have a relative who's hospitalized in L Hospital. . ." The crystal ceiling lamp in the main hall of the villa was shining and blinding. Lin Yan tried to organize the thoughts in his mind, but the middle-aged man suddenly interrupted him. "You work somewhere, right? I paid all the money that should be paid to the school, the hospital and the cemetery bills have also been settled, and I don't owe anything to the commissary, so what are you doing here?"

Lin Yan hurriedly explained: "No, no, you misunderstand. It's not about money. I know this sounds ridiculous and you might not believe it, but your son's ghost is still in the hospital and he's waiting for you to visit him."

The middle-aged man's expression grew strange, and he held the doorknob as if he was about to close the door: "You're sick. What about my son's ghost? Jintian was buried long ago."

Lin Yan frowned. How could such a father exist? Hearing something about his son, even if it wasn't reliable, there was no way he could just immediately disregard it.

"This is the case; do you know why Jintian had an accident? He always felt sorry that you didn't get to see him before he died. Up to now, his soul has been unwilling to move on. He's attached to my relative's daughter waiting for you to come back. You may not understand, but a little girl being possessed by a ghost is in a dangerous situation." Lin Yan gesticulated anxiously: "Just like in the movies."

"If you don't go, Jintian's ghost will never be able to reincarnate. After a long period of time, not only will he suffer, but he may also harm others. When that time comes, for the safety of my relatives and her daughter, I'll have to disperse your son's soul." Lin Yan was in a cold sweat while talking. If he had said this kind of stuff a month ago, he would've thought he had brain damage. He thought he was cheating him out of some money, but what else could he say? Your son’s strong brainwaves caused a disorder in the hospital’s electromagnetic field, causing an innocent thirteen-year-old girl to develop hallucinations and die?

The middle-aged man frowned. He pulled his right hand back from the door frame and tightened the belt of the bathrobe: "Tell you what, I know about this. I’ve been busy lately. You can contact my secretary. Tell him how much money you want to send Jintian away, and I'll ask him to write a check."

"I said this has nothing to do with money. If you don't meet him, no money in the world could fix this!" Lin Yan really got angry this time. Was there something wrong with this guy's brain? How could he only think of money when it comes to his son?!

"Dad, what are you doing? Mom is calling you!" A five or six-year-old boy suddenly ran out from behind the middle-aged man, hugged his waist and acted like a baby. He saw Lin Yan standing at the door and started sucking his thumb, looking at Lin Yan with a pair of black grape-like eyes wide open. The middle-aged man lovingly picked up the child and placed him on his shoulders. When he looked at Lin Yan again, he put on an impatient expression.

"Who the hell do you think you are? Some mage? You're at my doorstep at night, talking nonsense, and I'm calling the police if you don't leave!"

"Who's been at the door for so long? Another bill collector? I've got no money, tell him to go the same way he came." The door was suddenly yanked open and a young woman in the purple bathrobe stood in front of Lin Yan with an imposing attitude. Her figure was slim, snowy breasts hidden behind a lace corset, and her sharp eyes were like a blade scraping Lin Yan.

Lin Yan's argument had been completely disrupted by the battle in front of him and he stammered: "Uh, I, I'm here about your son, Zhou Jintian. . ."

Before he could finish, the woman instantly changed her face and said in a high voice: "There's no end to this. How much money has been spent on the seed left behind by that yellow-faced woman? From the best hospitals to the most expensive graves; his son cut his own life short and didn't fight to survive, yet he's still shoving his way into our lives?" After speaking, the little boy was shoved in front of Lin Yan: "Okay, this is my son, he's the only one!"

After speaking, she didn't care about her husband's ugly face and slammed the door with a bang.

Lin Yan clenched his fists and stood in the dark doorway, chills in his heart.

He didn't know how he got back into the car, but when he looked out the window, he felt that the whole villa suddenly became ugly, and even the blooming roses in the yard looked like abscesses. He never believed that there were parents like this that existed. He thought that familial love was the warmest, strongest and most unshakable emotion in the world, but this time he really saw the indifference and coldness of the human heart.

Don’t test humanity, don’t, because it was simply unbearable. Lin Yan sat in the car seat and tried to slow his breathing, but his anger still grew, and all Xiao Yang's grieving and crying face appeared in front of him. How much did a child need to miss his father to have the courage to jump off of a third-story building? If his spirit in heaven knew what had unfolded here today, would he feel like his death was all for nothing?

Lin Yan slammed his fist heavily against the steering wheel.

A cold hand lightly touched his face. Lin Yan twisted his head and said hoarsely, "Xiao Yu, don't mess with me. I don't want to coax you now, I just want to beat someone up." He kicked the clutch hard and said: "Fuck this guy!"

Xiao Yu patiently tugged Lin Yan's wrist and wrenching his shoulder to make him face him. His eyes were vicious: "What do you want to do?"

"What can I do? Go back and let A-Yan find a way to make the little brat forget that he has a father!" Lin Yan gasped.

Xiao Yu shook his head, glanced at the outline of the villa in the night, and slowly said, "I'll do it."

"You mean. . ." Lin Yan looked at Xiao Yu blankly, and suddenly understood what he meant. After a long silence, he bit his lower lip and said, "Before this, I always thought I was kind, that there was nothing I couldn't bear, but. . ." Lin Yan stared at Xiao Yu: "I just want to be a fucking asshole! He deserves it!"

"Xiao Yu, I don't care what tactics you use. Before noon tomorrow, I want to see him come to the hospital to apologize to his son!" Lin Yan said viciously in the dark cab.

Xiao Yu squeezed his hand and whispered, "Don't worry."

#dig a grave to dig out a ghost translation #dig a grave to dig out a ghost #danmei novel #danmei #yaoi novel #yaoi #bl novel #chinese bl #chinese novel #english translation

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pak-pak-suhgar · 4 years

Text

Lost One

Pairing: Johnny x Jaehyun

genre: angst, happy ending at the end.

Summary: In which where Jaehyun caught Johnny and Taeyong on their bed. With Johnny on top of Taeyong— topless. How did the two older guys got into that position? Jaehyun doesn't know and Johnny doesn't either, leaving the younger in a broken heart state.

A/N: My first yaoi fanfic on this blog and my first johnjae fanfic as well. This was written on phone so sorry for the mistakes. English isn't my first language either so I apologize for the grammatical error! Happy reading~

Johnny and Jaehyun has been dating for almost 4 years. Yes, you heard it right. They've been together for whole fucking years. So, why is it one of those times now where Jaehyun has to see an unpleasant scene before him? He stood at their door, frozen in his spot. Both guys haven't realized his presence not until he accidentally chokes out a sob. Johnny looked back, ready to glare whoever it was that interrupted them only to have his eyes widen. He immediately got off of Taeyong while the other older guy sat up. Panic was plastered over their face as Johnny quickly dresses himself and sprinted his way towards to Jaehyun. Ready to explain whatever bullshit he could come up with.

Jaehyun remained on his spot, unmoving but his eyes were avoiding the taller one's who was now grabbing both of his arms. Jaehyun was emotionally drained- exhausted, numb. His feelings was all over the place that he doesn't know what to feel, "Jaehyun.. I can explain... It's not what it looks like-" Slap! Jaehyun could feel the excruciatin pain on his palm the moment it landed on Johnny's cheek, "But it is what it looks like." he replied spitefully, as much as he wanted to sound emotionless and harsh. He was too hurt to even try to sound like one. Jaehyun doesn't want to hear Johnny's explanations, so he swatted the elder's hands and made his way towards their shared closet. He grabs his bag and began to put all of his stuff or whatever he could grab from the closet.

This put Johnny on alert as he stood behind Jaehyun and held his wrist in attempt to stop him, "Baby, what are you doing- where are you going?" he bombards the younger with questions. Jaehyun doesn't bother to reply as he only prys Johnny's hands away, when he settled most of his stuff. His eyes were bloodshot red, he looks at Johnny then at Taeyong who couldn't look straight in his eyes. He wanted to shout at both men and tell them off. But he decides that they aren't worth it, so instead pushes Johnny out of the way and left their room, "Jaehyun- baby, wait!" Johnny calls out but Jaehyun never turned back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few weeks had passed since Johnny has last seen Jaehyun, he couldn't contact him either and he was worried sick. Jaehyun wasn't in the dorms, that was alarming. Johnny had tried to contact Jaehyun's closest friends, but none of them spoke about the younger's whereabouts. Or at least they wouldn't out Jaehyun just like that considering of what he did to Jaehyun. Johnny runs his hands through his hair in frustration and punched the wall, Taeyong who had witnessed the scene came up to Johnny and held hos hand, Johnny pushes him away and glared at him, "Don't fucking touch me! I-It's all your fault! Jaehyun is nowhere to be found and our relationship is at stake!" Taeyong could only scoff before glaring back at the taller male.

"If you could have had kept your dick in your pants and didn't allowed yourself to get seduced by me, you wouldn't be in this situation, Johnny. You put yourself into this situation." Taeyong says, before he leaves Johnny alone. He remained speechless and unmoving in his spot, what Taeyong said was true. Johnny wasn't able to wait for Jaehyun that he just let his emotions eat him up and control him to give in to his desires. Jaehyun had been fairly busy with his drama film that Johnny barely saw Jaehyun- let alone have sex with him. Whenever Jaehyun comes home, he was dead tired and would knock out the moment he sleeps in their bed. Johnny blames himself from everything that happened. He was afraid, he was scared- scared to death that Jaehyun will leave him for good. He sat on the floor and hugged his knees as he could do nothing but cry his heart out hoping that the pain will fade somehow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Sicheng, I really can't bother you and Kun hyung anymore.. I'm sorry for crashing in but thank you for letting me stay." Jaehyun says, looking so apologetically at Sicheng. The male could only snort and waved his hand in dismiss, "Jae, you're always welcome here. Are you sure you can go back? Are you ready to face him?" Sicheng asks, concern written all over his face as he looks out for his friend. It took Jaehyun a few moments before nodding his head, "Yeah... I have to go home. I can't run away from it forever." he replies, he could feel the tears pricking his eyes but he blinks them away. He had been crying for weeks and his eyes honestly hurt a lot. Sicheng nodded his head in understanding, sighing at his friends' demise before giving Jaehyun a pat on the back, "Fine, but if you wanna come back. You're welcome to." He reassures with a smile, to which the younger returns happily. They hug one last time before Jaehyun went back to the dorm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A loud banging woke Johnny up from his sleep, he groans at the noise and flutters his eyes open, "Come in." he says in a groggy voice before sitting up, Haechan slammed the door open as he ran towards Johnny, "Hyung. Jaehyun hyung came back home last night" with the information that Haechan spit out, Johnny became wide awake as he looked at Haechan, "J-Jaehyun? Where is he? I need to go see him." he says, almost wanting to fly towards wherever Jaehyun is, "In his old room! At the 10th floor!" Haechan shouted before Johnny disappeared into sight.

He wasted no time going upstairs and instantly inputting the passcode to the dorm, thankfully no one was inside so he invited himself in. He didn't think twice to barge into Jaehyun's room, his eyes searching for the man everywhere and when it landed on the figure. He felt like he could breathe again, like suddenly the air that was knocked out from him came back. His gaze softens as he looks at the man who was peacefully asleep. But his heart breaks when he realizes that Jaehyun may probably break their relationship off. It explains why he went here instead of going back to their bedroom. Of course Jaehyun wouldn't want to be reminded of what happened in that room.

They made so many good memories but also made the most hurtful one. Johnny was about to caress Jaehyun's face when the younger suddenly woke up from his sleep, he suddenly sat up and moved away drom Johnny, making Johnny's heart break into pieces, "What are you doing here?" Jaehyun was the first to break the silence, sucking in a deep breath as he looks everywhere but Johnny, "I... I know it's too late but I wanted to apologize." Johnny said, pausing for a moment and waits for Jaehyun to respond. When the younger didn't, he assumed that he gave him the chance to explain now so Johnny began doing so.

"I.. I let my emotions get to me. You were just so busy that we barely had time together.. When was the last we had sex? Whenever I took the initiative, you'd brush me off. And whenever you're back in our room, you knock out. I know you have drama filming but you didn't give us some time together-" Johnny was cut off by the loud scoff that Jaehyun made, the younger finally looks at him. And he felt his heart break as he sees the tears in Jaehyun's eyes. "And that gives you the excuse to fuck Taeyong? He seduced you and you give in? Have you even thought of me when you let your 'so called emotions' eat you up?" he asks, Johnny couldn't speak and this made only Jaehyun snort. He was right, it's no excuse for him. It's the end, Johnny thinks.

Jaehyun took a deep breath before finally speaking, "Look.. I know, we haven't spent much time these days.. I was planning to take you out on a trip because we finally finished our last filming. As soon as we finished, I came back as early as I could, John. That day... I planned everything out. But you- you and Taeyong hyung..." Jaehyun couldn't continue to speak as he chokes out a sob. He harshly wipes the tears away before covering his face with his hands, Johnny couldn't take the scene anymore and ended up pulling the younger in his arms. Hugging him flush to his chest as he sniffs in Jaehyun's scent. God knows how much he missed holding the younger in his arms like this, Jaehyun didn't bother pulling away.

When he felt the younger calm down, Jaehyun pulls away and wipes his tears. Johnny dreaded this moment, the silence was triggering his anxiety when Jaehyun kept his mouth shut. He was anxiously waiting for the younger to speak and when he did, he cut Jaehyun off. "Johnny, I think we should-" "No!" Johnny imemdiately declines, startling the younger male. "No... please... don't.. I... I don't-" "You don't wanna make up?" Jaehyun asks, tilting his head innocently. This caught Johnny off. He wasn't breaking up? "You won't... break up with me?" Johnny asks, hope fills his eyes, Jaehyun blinks at him in confusion before slowly nodding his head. "I won't... you hurt me, John. But when we first dated.. I told you no relationships are perfect.. and so is ours.. However, I can't really forget about this. But, no matter how painful it is.. My love is still stronger. I just needed a break and to gather my thoughts.. Breaking up with you crossed my mind and I debated over that for a few weeks that I was gone." Jaehyun says, biting his inner cheek as he confesses his feelings out. "But, I realized that my heart will always long for you, it will always love you. Because you are my soulmate, Youngho. I could never leave you."

And maybe, even if things do get toxic. Jaehyun will be too much of a martyr person to ever leave Johnny. So, they eventually make up and try to patch their relationship again.

Johnny kisses Jaehyun's forehead as he held the younger in his arms, "Thank you, Yoonoh.." Jaehyun tilts his head and glances up at Johnny, "For what?" "For not becoming my lost one."

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ziracona · 4 years

Note

D E and R (for In Living Memory/DBD) ask meme thing

D: Pairing I wish I liked but just can’t.

E: Have you added anything cracky/hilarious to your fandom? If so, what?

R: A pairing you ship that you don’t think anyone else ships.

D: Haha, I am a multishipper so usually I ship a bunch just at tiers. And like, most of the ones I don’t like I dislike for very very excellent reasons and have no regrets at. Uhhhh, I guess either MichaelxJake or DavidxDwight maybe? I’d have had no particular interest in eithet so idk if it counts, but I /would/ really like not to be annoyed by the existence of both, and it is the fault of neither ship itself. Just so much of the fans for Jake-Michael do the racist smol smiley cute Asian Jake stereotype thing & make it super gross & violent non-con at the same time (and don’t get me started on the injustice to my boy Michael. Just use one of the already nasty serial killers like Danny if u into that, plz). And then David-Dwight is like the /only/ survivor ship I dislike for a reason other than massive age gap, & I dislike that one bc so much of the art & fic & love for it is a really gross ancient yaoi big rough scary man (tm) + tiny uwu crying wifey boi, & it’s really gross infantilization of Dwight against his character, & is also just like...a pretty gross old specific voiyeristic fetishization of gay men by casting them in old stereotypical MlW relationship roles & playing it up while pretending there’s nothing f’d up about any of this? & bc that’s what I see so much of the time and saw first for both ships, while otherwise I’d have probably been very chill, now I take psychic dmaage even seeing totally nice normal art for them bc it dredges up so much stuff I wish I’d never seen & I wish I could scrup my memory banks & self-repair this issue. :’-]] but I can’t.

E: Uhhh, probably. Welcome to Hell with Meg Thomas might count, and I am sure there’s other stuff too, but the whole Walmart Event that was mostly supposed to be secret bc it’s possible endgame for one of my big fics really blew up from 1 ask & got amazing art from @soozylegion and I am pretty sure just that whole like self-creating two day movement or whatever it was counts.

R: Ooof this one is hard because so many people ship so much. Uhhhh, I ship a lot of rarepairs, but I know at least one other who ships most of them—wait. Okay, so. Back when I started writing ILM, Ace and Adam just really clicked super well, despite being complete opposites in almost all ways except being good dudes? And I kinda shipped it and I think you can see that through at least Many More in-fic. But I was in a DbD discord at the time, and the one time I mentioned liking the ship (I think we were talking about Adam ships bc someone brought up Adam-Jeff?), someome went off over the age difference, so I just kind of backed off it after that bc it wasn’t a great time in my life and I really didn’t want to get harrassed or shit-talked by people I thought were neat (I mean who ever does but usually I am more tanky. Then was...not a good time. 😔). And I don’t think I’ve ever even admitted to liking that pair since then.

#ask #theinkgirl #these were fun!#dead by daylight #dbd #in living memory #in living memory (fic)#yes I know the ship names for both of those but I am trying to be considerate and stay out of tags for those fans by not having them in the #body of my post either 👈👈😎

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postmodernmulticoloredcloak · 4 years

Text

Back to my Safari bookmarks! If you’re wondering why I’d make hundreds and hundreds of bookmarks from tumblr, it’s because I had anxiety and didn’t have a blog yet. Took me a while and eventually I just impulsively made it one night.

- awww ancient Stucky fanart

- several etsy articles that are no longer available

- “Oops! Website deactivated”

- many, many, many links to nothing, but also an array of super random tumblr posts, and when I say random I mean random

- this was when CATWS was fresh and people were like :O

- a list of recipes to replicate fast food from some American chains at home... ew why would I want to eat any of these things ew ew

- past me, please explain, why would you bookmark all this stuff. why so many bookmarks of possible iphone cases to buy. you did buy some eventually. why keep these b--

- horizontally cutting an apple and putting peanut butter inside it DOES NOT make it a sandwich, American person who wrote this article about sandwich ideas. Wait, “Apple and Gruyere Waffle Sandwich”? That’s even worse.

- you again?? No, using a tomato instead of hamburger buns DOES NOT make a hamburger. How am I supposed to bite into the sk... nevermind.

- awww a bunch of etsy links about products for babies! This is from when my nephew was born ^-^

- a 2004 essay about Dumbledore

- that manga about Jesus and Buddha in modern Japan

- pictures of blooming tea... I have purchased some from a Chinese reseller through Amazon a very long time ago, but the package is “in transit but late” :(

- Roberto Ferri’s paintings (those beautiful ones you saw years ago all over tumblr)

- pictures from the 1930s/40s in color

- super cute pet videos

- nothing says “Etsy” like kintsugi kits where you’re sent a broken object to repair (I didn’t want one, but the link showed me those)

- sure, pick a theme for your blog where microscopic text is written in beige over white background, I’m sure that’s a good idea

- do you think John Winchester apologists who get really intense when someone brings up literal canon still exist on this site or. Actually no I don’t want to know.

- I miss the Carver era meta guys

- an essay that reads the Iron Man trilogy through the lens of “cyborg feminism” but somehow the Iron Man trilogy seems to be a fever dream. That’s what happens when you make other 9472 terrible movies with Tony Stark in it when he’s always written terribly.

- Oh boi remember fanmail. I miss fanmail. They should being back fanmail.

- random stuff, broken links, random stuff, I’m deading, even Safari is suffering I had to close it and open it again asdfghjkl

- Writing Exercises (I’m not checking if it’s actually useful rn tho)

- this smol 2014 article about the Captain America fandom will make you cry now because we had such a good thing and they chose to punish us for it

- https://musicroamer.com and http://www.liveplasma.com

- oh man an essay on why it would be so important for many people if Johnlock became canon. I feel so sorry for the TJLC people, they deserved better

- damn!! Look at this Etsy store!! Look at this stuff!! I want!!

- that time Sergei Polunin danced to Take Me To Church

- the Supernatural soundtrack, episode by episode

- a twitter account that got suspended?? (But also ewwwww twitter shows me what’s trending in my country and ewwwww)

- Centuries Before Memes, There Were The LOLCats Of Japanese Woodprints

- there’s a broken link to a page inside the site “thetoast” and their broken link page says “Oh, bother.” and a picture of a burnt toast

- http://lexicity.com (The first and only comprehensive index for ancient language resources on the internet.)

- NASA Goddard Youtube channel

- omg this is so funny. An article about “awesome recycling ideas”. The objects to recycle? Include? A grand piano; a sea mine; an old boat; another grand piano; A BOEING 747 JUMBO JET ENGINE; another boat; sliced cars; multiple more pianos... thank you I really needed an idea on what to do with that stuff in my garage

- one of my first tumblr posts............. you really want to see it? do you? okay. But you need to be familiar with that famous Nietzsche passage about the announcement of the death of God. Yeah, I know. I can’t fathom how I got thousands of people to follow me.

- an amigurumi project I actually tried, with an acquaintance’s help and all, but I just couldn’t

- a folder of random stuff lebeled “bau” (“woof” in Italian, you know, what the dog says)

- more resources for my thesis I never used

- the map of the central building of my university (I always get lost in it)

- once upon a time, the most used word on the internet was “codependency”

- thanks, past me, for grouping all these links from tumblr blogs that changed their url all together so I can just delete everything with a single click.

- a folder “sherlock meta”. Blogs that deleted. (*touches the ground*...)

- discussions on the dismissal of the queer reading of Sherlock :’) I’m sorry guys

- it’s a good thing I didn’t have a blog back then. If I’d reblogged all the posts I’ve saved it would have been a mess.

- TEEN WOLF META asdfghjkl I routinely forget that Teen Wolf is a show I actually watched. Sure, I abandoned it at some point. Like everyone else did, I think.

- guys, we’re at posts from the first few days of 2014. We’re about to enter 2013. I don’t know what we’ll find.

- Destiel posts. These are all Destiel posts.

- a link to the Naruto manga on a manga reader site.

The Safari bookmarks end here, I think because for Christmas 2013, if I remember correctly, I got a new laptop. But there’s a folder with some bookmarks I imported from the old one...

- some resources on disability representation, random tumblr posts, and the family free of the Julio-Claudian dynasty

- super random tumblr blogs?? including the demo.tumblr.com??? idek

- oh boi. A super mega amount of tumblr blogs. How am I supposed to open these?? If I open all the tabs I’ll make my laptop crash... I’m not opening them. Most are unfamiliar, probably fandom blogs that changed their url twice a month, but I can spot a few I still follow :) Congrats, I “followed” you long before I had a blog myself.

Well, this was anticlimatic. Apparently, past me already got rid of all the wild stuff. There’s not even a SINGLE Glee thing? Not one? From 2014? Wait, what was airing in 2014? Season 5? Yeah, maybe that’s a reason. Still.

NEVERMIND I FOUND THEM, they’re no longer saved in a browser, I had changed laptops or sth and I had copied my bookmarks in a email I sent to myself so I could find the links again (which obviously says I made a selection, who knows how many bookmarks were lost. I don’t want to know lmao). I obviously have no reason, time or will to open them, but I can tell you I had divided them in categories:

- uni courses; Japan/Japanese; manga; philosophy and academical stuff; recipes; mixed [oh boi there’s some weird stuff here]; very useful sites; quotes & lyrics [what for?]; videos; Glee stuff; Glee art from DeviantArt; Glee tumblr blogs; Klaine-specific tumblr blogs; Supernatural stuff; Destiel-specific; my most used sites; Deviant Art - fanart [not specified, so I’m betting this is manga fanart - correction from some urls I can tell this is yaoi fanart, yep]; Deviant Art - non-fanart; watercolor images; Deviant Art - food; Deviant Art - pictures of Japan; something very embarrassing I’m not admitting it [no it’s not porn, that would be less embarrassing]; assorted tumblr posts; Supernatural meta; other tumblr posts.

So yeah that was my 2013, how was yours?

#blabbering me #bookmark adventures #this was such an alienating experience #never again

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beabaseball · 5 years

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this is a delirious 11pm post for Adults Only guys

Leave this space, child!

...

...y’all teenagers are going to be tweaked out of their goddamn minds.

Like, not necessarily in the drugged way, though some maybe yes in the drugged way, but like. Specifically in the non-drug way, they’re going to be snippy, and inattentive, and self centered. And that’s probably fine.

Like. Of course teens are self-centered, their bodies are doing weird shit for the first time and people keep making jokes they don’t understand yet, and some of these fuckers haven’t been given sex ed so they don’t even know what’s coming.

The younger teens have just emerged from the child form that has only just started being able to comprehend a larger world. In elementary school, sure I was reading time magazine for kids and we prayed for people who were being reported (religious school; recent tsunami, it happens) and when I was in 1st or 2nd grade we heard rumors that once upon a time women weren’t allowed to do the same stuff as men, but like— you can feel those things, but it’s not really something that you comprehend unless it’s right then a part of your life. I remember the first time I really ‘got’ sexism was in ninth grade in a gym class of 24 boys to 3 + me girls, and I wrote bad poetry about it in my phone for like three months trying to process it.

When I was like 16 our car broke down midway to school and we had to call my dorm parent to come drive me the next 5 mins, and so he’s in a bad mood bc he has to pick me up, and mom is in a bad mood bc car she gets a feeling dorm parent didn’t believe her when she said the car broke down, and it’s like 80 out but more importantly the humidity is a swamp, and I just remember being in his car driving the rest of the way to school and he’s complaining about sunburns bc he’s super pale and Irish, but he’s trying to talk so I kind of say “huh well i’ve never gotten a sunburn. I tan real fast and then go inside and I’m white again.”

and even in the moment I remember being like “that’s not really what he wanted to hear” and I think he even made a face, but I was too out of it and hot and tired to really do anything passed that. And I do feel kind of bad about it? Like, I did not mean to demean his pain of sunburns and I know also that at the time he was having A Rough Time with his marriage, to the point where he had us doing religious plays about parenthood for three seasons straight.

But also, I was a teenager. And looking back I can’t exactly blame my past self for just kinda... saying some words and feeling bad the rest of the car ride but also too tired to care. Theater teacher man wasn’t a bad guy; we were definitely not good at reading each other and he thought musicals sucked, but he also was the one who comforted me out of a panic attack when we had a tornado warning and I ended up convinced my daystudent friend was going to die.

Because that’s what I cared about at the time. Me-related things. Yes, tornado, but I am worried about one (1) person, and that mattered to me. I stayed behind when we got an actual sex-ed person in 7th grade because I was scared that reading yaoi would send me to hell. I had a breakdown in front of my history professor because one of my friends was discovering her gender identity and I was scared I was ‘losing her’ (you know the words!)

Now, someone comes out to me or someone doesn’t understand a term and I’m over here like “yea which definition u wanna use” but back then I was a kid and I had never experienced anything like this before, my hormones were wild—which didn’t mean I was horny and wanted boyfriend, it meant I was in constant fear of bleeding through things and every now and then I would wake up and my body would be in surprise unknowable pain (aka I was finally big enough to cut off my own circulation in my sleep and also growing pains)

Now, I’ve got a lot of that under control. When I wake up with a body in pain I usually know why and probably it is my fault actually. I know a bit better how to get through days when I’m too hot, or too groggy, or just dissociation or mad. (The trick is: say aloud, “sorry if I’m not responding much, I’m just really hot/groggy/out of it/still upset about that.” )

That’s not something a lot of teens have down yet. I saw a kid with a naruto shirt on at work once and I said “hey naruto” and he looked at me like he’d seen the face of god, he was so surprised someone knew what naruto was. To someone even MILDLY in my age range, the idea of not knowing who Naruto is is preposterous. But this was like, 12-15 year old at the most. Not hit his growth spurt yet. Just absolutely blindsided that there was an outside world which recognized something he liked, which I’m gonna wildly guess his parents probably aren’t into or don’t talk about it with him, because the thought of talking Naruto with your kid is horrifying.

Obviously, thinking other people don’t know about naruto is a similar kind of self-centered thought along the lines of “I bet thigh chick isn’t a REAL fan of x” or “EVERYONE has an opinion on me and there is no in between” where like the world... sort of revolves around you.

And like, once that person grows up if they keep that sort of self-focus, that’s usually the time you start trying to ditch them, but even older teens are still just coming out of that larval childhood state. They know a lot more about the world than we probably did at their age—I know a lot of them aren’t having the same existential crisis over their friends’ gender like I did, which is a big ol step— but there are still days that it’s going to be too much new shit to deal with, plus whatever else is happening inside them personally. And it’ll take a while to learn how to handle that.

In the meantime, they might be snappish, or out of it, or just kind of give up and have a ‘fuck it’ attitude sometimes, and it drives a lot of adults just goddamn insane it seems, according to all the mildly aggressive parents at work, trying to get kids who don’t want to be there to give the right reactions. It’s probably not even anything personal to the event that’s making them unhappy. One time I talked to a kid who was crying, and when I got her to tell me what was bothering her, it turned out that some people on her family reunion were mean to her. Nothing about the immediate ‘now’, just a lot of emotion that needed to go somewhere, and that somewhere ended up being crying, and it was not at all about respect or disrespect or anything related to us. Probably most of what was needed was to talk about it (success) and take a long nap.

The first time I remember having a meltdown with a ‘trigger’ like that, I was in 5th grade and my first assignment was something like “what did you do over summer” so I lost my entire shit and cried on the couch for an hour. Passed out, slept til 7, woke up and was fed soup, and have no idea if I finished that paper but presumably I did because I remember a nap and food working.

I would keep having these homework meltdowns periodically, and I don’t know when they stopped, but I had at least one, maybe two, in my first year of college.

And eventually I’ve just kinda.... stopped having them. Stress about a big project wasn’t something that bothered me anymore. You just did it one step at a time, and when you started thinking “maybe I’ll do it in the morning”, you immediately go to bed because you’ve already lost the fight and even if you don’t do it in the morning at least you won’t face it sleep deprived.

It takes time and living to get these experiences, and while one kid might not have the same issues with school work I had, maybe something else just knocks them on their ass every time (same) and it is just. Literally something you need to live through a couple times before you know how to deal with it. You can provide Blank Slate Alien Person with all the mental health tips and anecdotal advice and chamomile tea as you want, but the first couple times they face stress, none of those tips help if they don’t know how to implement them.

If you’ve ever assembled something by instructions and ended up building it upside down—it’s easier to build it again once you’ve gotten mad and undone it and started again. Because you’ve practiced. You already had the instructions, but now you have the experience of building it already, even if the result wasn’t the one you wanted.

Teens are learning a) how to read instructions, and b) that their assembly is probably upside down. and in the meantime, the world is also bonkers wild right now.

When they have that moment of rage, or giving up, or aloofness upon finding shit got built upside down— just. Let them.

You don’t have to ‘fix’ it or ‘fix’ them for having these emotions, or lack of them.

These are normal reactions. They make sense. All I’m asking is that we understand it’s going to happen. These emotions are going to happen.

Don’t let yourself justify being mean to kids and teens by telling yourself they’re being disrespectful. The world and their lives and emotions also don’t revolve around you. It’s not always a rebellion or reason to fight when things get too high strung to hold total control of.

That doesn’t mean ignore them. I was maybe 12 or 13, and it was 90 on a metal ship, and i was wearing an under shirt because i didn’t have a bra, so two layers of clothes on a hot metal ship, on my period— and all I remember is asking my dad to let us sit down and eat some lunch, because i was dizzy and dehydrated, and all he just kept saying we would do it once he saw the tour. I have no idea how long it was but I probably could’ve cried and been called moody or uncooperative.

Life is difficult. Especially for people who aren’t yet in control of their situations. Who are still bursting out with emotions they can’t otherwise articulate.

Be kind to that.

#long post #ramble #teenagers #kids #teens #puberty #puberty Sucks #especially when the world continues to exist around you #beatext #memories

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dailystarknews · 5 years

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Day 11 : Thursday 26th of March.

Hello everybody! What a beautiful day, isn't it? MY ASS! I'm going to die from awkwardness before the end of this containement. I had the most embarassing and humiliating awakening ever.

As I told you yesterday, Bucky and I slept together again. You're probably asking yourself what happened for me to be that much tense right? Well, how can I say that? I woke up early in the morning but not because of what you think! Alright, because you're certainly smart, you probably think that I woke up because of others nightmares and that I cried and that Bucky took me in his arms because his a fucking sweet cinnamon roll who smells like old books, metal, lemon, honey and sexappeal. This may surprise you but this is not what happened AT ALL. To be honest I had one of the greatest dreams that I ever had since a long moment. Ok, so, here's my dream: There was this beautiful king size bed in a circle shape with red silk sheets on it, in the middle of my bedroom. And I remember there was candles everywhere( gold and red, smelling like roses and cinnamon I think... Who fucking cares about that right?) Alright, get ready for it, because it's becoming really stupidly cliché. Bucky was in the middle of the bed with a golden underwear and he was doing like push-ups (??? What the fuck, brain?)... So I was just standing there looking at him and he finally saw me. He lay down and looked at me with a smirk and a small sigh before he told me: "Hey, Tiny! I didn't see you there! Wanna give me a hand on that? " (God it sounds like a bad porno! Maybe it was just a bad porno because I never actually experienced nothing like that... Not that I'm virgin, I mean... NEVERMIND.) So, in a second I just appeared under him and we started to... You perfectly know what we started to do! Anyway, after few minutes (I think) He just said something like "Winter is coming." What the fuck? Am I in a fucking Yaoi or something?!

This is when I woke up. So I was not crying, not even screaming or panicking. The thing is... I was sweating and had a fucking erection. I was so fucking embarassed but the worst was still when I turned to watch Bucky and he was looking at me worriedly. "You're ok? You're all red and you were doing weird noises. Did you had another nightmare?" He asked. I don't know if I felt more humiliated in my life than at this moment. I think I just blushed even more after what he said. I was so panicked and awkward about the situation that I just nodded. I nodded. Am I dumb or what? I could have said no, made him think that I had fever and that he should go away for a moment but he would have panicked and it's actually pretty much mean to do that in this period. "Ok, it's fine. You wanna talk about it?" He asked by coming closer. He tried to take me in his arms and I step back quickly. "I'm fine, sorry. It's just I'm sweating and stuff... I just need to take a shower. Too hot." I stuttered when I looked at his puppy eyes. I'm pretty sure he thought I've been scared of him at this moment. He just said Ok and stood up: "I'm going to see if Jarvis needs help for the breakfast, ok?" He said before he goes. So? I told you so, the worst awakening ever. 😰😰

The day didn’t get that much better after thanks Loki... I mean, fuck.

Alright after the awkward breakfast (and the cold shower of course) I returned in Howard's lab. We worked on the arm together and that was truly amazing to learn things from the greatest genius of this era. After two hours, he decided to go read a book next to the swimming pool and enjoy the sun. So he leave me alone in the lab.

After lunch, I just remembered that I wanted to do research about the Winter Soldier that I was hearing about in my dreams. I get to the lab. Fuck, I still can't believe it... I don't know if I can really tell you about what I discovered... But I really need to talk about it to someone. Ok, so, I get to the lab, I locked the door just in case you know? And I finally turned on the computer. I started to do my research about the Winter Soldier and as I thought not a single file, not a note, no trace at all. Oh, really Howard, you still think you can hide things from me? Alright then, I knew it would not be easy but I also knew that I know how to hack a computer and find the most embarrassing informations about someone. So, I would have my answers. I successfully found what I was looking for, it was crypted files with a security that I've never seen before. Howard was protecting that with all he had. But why that, right? At this point I thought about giving up, you know? Maybe I should have...

But if my dad was hiding it with so much skills it must be truly important, right? I needeed to know. I needeed it. I opened the files successfully after an hour and a half. And it was terrifying. The Winter Soldier project was actually one of Leviathan's Projects. If some of you don't know Leviathan, it's the Russian division of Hydra. Some of the worst psychopaths on Earth are actually working with those guys. The W.S.P. (Winter Soldier Project) started in 1945. Hydra, I mean Leviathan, captured a dozen of kids and bring them to Siberia. In a fucking bunker... Shit, I have chills just by writing all of that. Those kids...

Ok, basically, Leviathan took them, injected them a serum (something similar to my father but less powerfull if I trust the composition.) and for those who survived it... Alright, basically the point was to do an army of overtrained assassins. They did a lot of crazy tests on the children, I read somewhere that one of the kids ... Shit, now that I think it's probably Bucky. Ok, I read somewhere that they cut one of the kid's arm. He was the oldest, 4 or 5 years old. They cut his arm to see if it was growing up again because of the serum. (What kind of man can do that...?) When they understood that it would not happen they put him a metal arm.

Leviathan trained them, brainwashed them when they didn't wanted to train or accept the treatments and they send them to missions. The metal arm kid has been named the Winter Soldier. He was the first soldier who had a mission. The first success. Oh, and for the story to be even more creepy and terryfiyng... When they were not using the kids they were frozen. Frozen, litterally, in a fucking box. My father Steve successfully dismanteled the organization when the Winter Soldier was 13 apparently. I don't know what happened to the kids after that. But the more I think about it, the more I accept the idea of Bucky being The Kid... Everything makes sense now, right? The Metal arm, the russian accent, the skills against Steve... This incredibly tall and strong body.

After my discovery, I quickly closed everything and turned off the computer. I got another annxiety attack, so violent that I thought I would loose conscience for a moment. I get out of the lab and I tried to find Howard in the library. He helped me calm down and asked me what happened. I couldn't tell him the Truth. I was terrified and shocked. I don't know how to stop thinking about it now. All the files keep haunting my head and I just have the image of those poor kids... Of Bucky... I'm in my room right now, I locked my door, I don't really know why. I just don't feel that much safe anymore. Everything seems a bit crazy around. I don't know. I think I need to sleep. I don't know if I will succeed but I really need to try. I just have the feeling that my chest is burning, I hope the Reactor his working well...

Take care of you and your family. Stay safe, stay home.

#tony stark #winteriron #This is a Winteriron Story #bucky barnes #tony stark x bucky barnes #winter soldier #howard stark #steve rogers #Steve Rogers x Howard Stark #day 11

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courage-a-word-of-justice · 5 years

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Iruma-kun 10

That mascot is still around to annoy poor Kalego, huh? (LOL) I also noticed the demonstration demons have horns like oni.

Oh no! This means Azz-Azz is a prime target for Iruma!

(I was going to write something. Then I got so engrossed in the action, I forgot to…)

LOL, Sabro’s too heavy for Team A to lift!

Oh, Iruma’s hair isn’t tied anymore…

“…pruning this cactus.” – Does Eggie-sensei like plants?

Ooh, the first double-parter ever for this show, I think it is.

Shinchou Yuusha 9

Apparently ep 10 got delayed…*sigh*

LOL, thre’s product placement for a certain ice cream brand in this episode, huh?

Can we not with the boob grope???

*Rista takes care of Mash and Elulu* - Rista’s such a mom sometimes…

Stars Align 9

This one scene with Nao looks really blue…it’s almost unsettling.

Oh dear…I understand the sentiment of an inferiority complex all too well.

Dr Stone 22

Now we’re back to good ol’ science vs. survival of the fittest philosophy clash. Now, see, that’s the Dr Stone I like best!

Torricelli’s law.

Why is mica like baumkuchen? Probably because it has a lot of layers…

Wow, for WSJ – which encouraged fangirls all over the world to make yaoi/shonen ai ships – they sure tossed out the yaoi/shonen ai option real fast…

Skarn. I’ve never heard of it until now.

Magma, staring at the product of magma…LOL.

I…don’t get it. Even after watching the bit again, I don’t understand why Magma was trying to save Senku.

So…as is said for most WSJ series, the treasure was the friends we made along the way…LOL, what a way to acknowledge a trope.

Lemme guess…surprise birthday party? (Sorry, when I was reading up on Magma earlier, I saw that Magma helps with a birthday surprise for Senku and I found out what it was.)

I wonder if Rei is still up there at this point…? (Who’s Rei? You’ll find out if you read the Byakuya reboot…)

Well, “Rock Day” only works in Japanese. The language would’ve drifted over thousands of years so it shouldn’t work in the year 5731 (or whatever year Dr Stone is set).

Dr Stone 23

One episode until the end…but I’m away over Christmas, so I’ll have quite a bit to catch up on when I’m back. Update: I never did end up going away over Christmas.

Senku is much more of a trickster hero than an action hero. That’s been pretty obvious all the way through, but here it’s at its most obvious.

Oh, so Kaseki made the village bridge? Is that a correct assumption…? Update: I think the answer was yes from the manga.

How much chemistry does Gen know, anyway? Assuming he’s a humanities person because of psychology and his tricks, it must only be basic, right?

Thse intense stares…I’ve been reading JJBA: DiU lately, so I’m expecting an 80s-style “!!” to appear over someone’s head at this point, LOL.

Ooh, hardware. In fact, it looks like the inside of a computer…or, more relevant to this case, a phone.

So it’s not “rules are rules” anymore? Now Kinro’s changed his words to reflect his faith in Senku…hmm! Interesting! (Update: A quick google says Kinro is 18. Senku is about 18 (+ 3700 years). Plus, after they start dragging Ginro away, Kinro says his trademark line.)

Wouldn’t the coal smoke alert Tsukasa of the village’s location, though…? Then again, thanks to Homura and Hyouga, Tsukasa already knows their location…oops.

Rochelle salt.

I saw that one shot of the world from the 1st OP and I thought there was meant to be a post-credits segment…LOL, nope.

Dr Stone 24 (FINAL)

The “acquisition message” basically said “We didn’t (just) need one cell phone, (so) it was useless!” Notably, it uses the counter for large items (like computers) for the phone.

Having finished the Byakuya reboot now, I wanna cry every time I hear about the guy…

Oh! The eyecatch is a record!

Basically, what records do is that they recreate sounds by using vibrations created by the grooves of the disc. Sound is a set of vibrations.

“Astronauts are science elites…” – Except maybe Lillian Weinberg…

I like Shamil out of the guys from the Soyuz the most. He’s a cross between Tsukasa and Senku. Stoic yet skeptical, a voice of reason for Byakuya’s sillier outbursts.

I wouldn’t be surprised if the shield was made with CGI, tbh.

Byakuya’s humour here is betraying the emotional capacity of the scene…it’s gone from “100% tear-inducing” to “confusing”.

Please sing Tsubasa wo Kudasai, Lillian…*crosses fingers*

I didn’t get what I wanted, but oh well. This song is good too. (I wouldn’t be surprised if most of the record player was CGI too. It’s good CGI for sure.)

LOL, Puyo Puyo! Even Sherlock Holmes! Dragon Ball, Nintendo Switch, VR, Saiyuki! It’s like a treasure trove of references!

Normally the s2 announcement comes after the credits, so I was thrown for a loop when it was announced before the ED…anyways, this is the end of the s1 coverage. See you for s2!

BnHA 72

[no notes, sorry!]

Iruma-kun 11

Robin looks like Iruma…(this vaguely annoys me.)

I noticed Keroli (sp?) is in the back left, alone…that’s kinda sad.

Sabro is hella tall…even taller than Azz-kun, and that says something.

Ah…I love Eggie-sensei. He’s so funny!

Really? I thought Sullivan wrote them (the rules).

I wanna see an episode where Eggie-sensei can’t turn into his fuzzy form and has to do familiar activities with Iruma. That, or an episode where Eggie-sensei has some human parts and some familiar ones (although that would scare some little kids, I think…)

What a Machiavellian mindset Eggie-sensei has!

Iruma’s got wine, people! Underage drinking is a no-no! (partially joking)

Good on ya, Clara! Go kick those girls to the kerb!

The butterflies are so beautiful in this show!

So basically school clubs.

Hmm…it’s almost a Fordist approach. I mean, “freeing yourself up to do other things” is basically the entire ethos of that.

NGL 10

I was reading JJBA: DiU today and Colt seriously looks like a Jojo’s character…

“Your face is just like…”

N-No way! You mean, the Victor Mary’s wanted to see all along…is the other gunhead…?! Geesh, what a plot twist!

Stars Align 10

“We all play to win.” – That’s very Maki of you, Maki.

Shinjo/Oshimi???? That must be Ryoma…! By the way, what’s up with these Itsuse twins…?

Who’s Hatanooka? Update: That’s the team with Joy in it…and those fangirls who busted Mitsue up.

F*** it…Arashi, I wanna pummel you someday.

LOL, you can sell your temmates out with chanpuru, huh, Arashi?

Did Maki suggest something subliminally…?

*Maki and Toma run around* - LOL, this play is completely unorthodox, haha. I can tell even if I’m no expert.

Shinchou Yuusha 10

We’re back after another week’s break…

Come to think of it, how do fantasy worlds have concepts of “hours”?

LOL, how convenient it was that there just happened to be a dude needing healing walking past! (partially sarcastic, partially meaning it since the circumstances foreshadowed it)

“Talent”, eh? *stares at the camera, which is showing Rista’s boobs, with disapproval*

The Demon Spirit Orb is basically a monster cell from OPM 2, isn’t it…?

If Seiya came from our world…then I’m sorry, Wolks, but whoever told you is completely and utterly wrong. *gestures at all the conflicts around the world, including political turmoil*

“Are you calling…”

No Guns Life 11

Second-last ep!

Oh great…another yandere?(I read JJBA: DiU hardcover vol. 2 yesterday, so I’m still thinking about Yukako Yamagishi…)

There’s a convertible in the OP, though…I wonder if that will come into play later. Update: Even if it does come into play in the future, it doesn’t happen in ths cour.

Stars Align 11

It was like Joy was showing off to the camera…LOL.

Apparently, Joy’s name is a weird reading for yorokobi (happiness).

This feels like a final episode…

Hmm. I thought Yonex sponsored this. Turns out that’s a parody logo after all (or at least, here it’s a parody).

One of the Itsuse bros looks exactly like Maki, so it’s confusing…

I’m still confused as to why Shijo Minami’s shirts say nantei on them. The minami might be nan in another way of reading it, but…the shi can only be read kokorozashi otherwise and while the jou can be read many, many ways, tei isn’t one of them.

Ume = plum blossom, so that purple-pink colour really suits them.

BnHA 73

Eri’s name means, literally, “to break reason”.

This scene with the stars and the dancefloor…that’s new.

Iruma-kun 12

Sometims you forget this dork *points at Azz* is more powerful than Iruma and Clara…

You can see Clara and Iruma in the shot of Azz-kun.

The reason why I like calling Kalego “Eggie-sensei” is because he doesn’t like it!

I love how the narrator is even aware it’s been mentioned several times Iruma can’t decline requests.

New Magic is basically science…?

Oh, it would be hilarious if this character Iruma just bumped into and he (Iruma) would be in a Battler together…but I’ve read spoilers, so I know what Iruma will join…

Is this some kind of allegory for technology…?! *eyes sparkle* Yes, I want in! Iruma! Join this club!

Even this demon’s clip is a book! Amazing!

Clara! She dab! In a pot!

Come to think of it, in the basic premise, Iruma-kun (the show) is Kenja no Mago, right? The Wise Man’s Grandson…sort of.

Shinchou Yuusha 11

Almost at the end…I’ll sorely miss this show.

Is Tiana some former version of Rista…?

How old is Seiya again…? Update: Apparently he’s 17…and if he’s the same age as he used to be in this flashback, then…kinda squicky, no?

Stars Align 12 (FINAL)

I heard this show dropped the ball and that Nao’s mother got a rant, but otherwise I don’t quite know what happens here…so let’s finish what we started. Update: Nao’s mother’s rant was in a previous episode.

Oh hey! It’s that running thing Nao and Taiyo were doing…I think. (I don’t think I’ve grasped everyone’s names, even over 12 eps, so I had to check Taiyo’s name up.)

Oh, these gremlins…*sighs happily but also exasperatedly* No wonder this show took out a top 10 position for my 2019 list.

I’m worried now…there’s always a last minute thing to ruin an episode on this show.

I always thought Ryoma’s hair was pretty nice…(small LOL). That’s just my bias for bishonen showing though.

I’m…scared now…Maki’s dad must’ve come back and the red in the sky really sold that moment…

Maki…no!!!!!!!! Aw, f***, that’s the final seconds…geesh, way to end the series. If this were a 2 cour, I’d definitely watch the next one, but since I heard through ANN that this is all we have so far, really, the only thing I can do for a passion project is hope another cour gets funded and (maybe) purchase what I can to help out. Well, that’s it, folks, skedaddle out of here until next time.

No Guns Life 12 (FINAL)

This pendant reminds me of the mana compass I saw in Fate/Zero yesterday.

I bet Danny planted those footprints…or something like that. Update: Yup, he did.

Come to think of it, is Juzo still missing his arm from last time…?

“You weren’t my client, little lady.” – There’s one of two possible options here, I think: 1) the hands guy was or 2) Danny was.

I wonder, will the hand Extended ever become his (Juzo’s) left hand? Or will he get an Extension for it?

Wow, second huge end-of-season cliffhanger! Juzo got a new buddy, it seems…anyway, see you in spring!

Cautious Hero 12 (FINAL)

If the Valkyryja (sp?) isn’t magic…what is it???

That one guy lying on the side of the fountain, looking all drunk…LOL.

Geez, you make me wanna cry, show!!!

Even the alarm clock is dejected…geez…

This is…the best conclusion of the fall season in that Seiya defeated the Demon King and the story wrapped up properly, but the worst in that Seiya died. No one died in Stars Align, even if they failed a tonne! So…I dunno. I guess it should be happy it ended optimistically…anyways, enough of my moping. See you next time.

BnHA 74

Shin Nemoto = “the truth of the origin of the sound”, if you stuck the particle no between each character.

Tintin got scary, LOL.

Lemillion, making “no capes” go out of fashion again (LOL).

Wow, talk about a clip show…! This is really one.

Check the end of the episode, don’t forget to watch the post-credits segments, people.

#simulcast commentary #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #shinchou yuusha #kono yuusha ga ore tueee kuse ni shinchou sugiru #no guns life #Stars Align #hoshiai no sora #Dr Stone #mairimashita! iruma-kun #welcome to demon school iruma kun #Chesarka watches MI-k #Chesarka watches BnHA #Chesarka watches Stars Align #Chesarka watches Shinchou Yuusha #Chesarka watches NGL #Chesarka watches Dr Stone #this hero is invincible but too cautious #the hero is overpowered but overly cautious

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writteninsunshine · 5 years

Text

Love And Lost - Clint Barton/Pietro Maximoff - SFW

Title: Love And Lost Author: Donnie Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe Setting: The Helicarrier Pairing: Clint Barton/Pietro Maximoff Characters: Clint Barton, Pietro Maximoff, Wanda Maximoff, Natasha Romanov, Bruce Banner, Tony Stark, Nick Fury, Steve Rogers Genre: Hurt/Comfort/Romance Rating: T Chapters: 1/1 Word Count: 1273 Type of Work: One-Shot, Part of the Clint Barton Bingo: Round Two Series Status: Complete Warnings: Gay, Slash, Yaoi, Mentions of Character Death, AU – Canon Divergent, Fix-It Fic, Pietro Didn't Die, AU - Soulmates Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Summary: Only two things could put Clint in such a sour mood over a victory, but only one thing could bring him back out of it. AN: Here we are at another Bingo fill, and I'm pretty happy to get through another one. I've been having a lot of issues at home lately, and so writing again felt really nice. Note: While this is a Soulmate AU, and I have a square for that, this isn't what I wanted to write for it. I just wanted to write a Soulmate AU and so it ended up being part of this fill. I hope that's okay.

Clint Barton Bingo Round 2 Masterlist Love And Lost ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ While everyone was fully aware that there had been a few hiccups (Hulk had thrown the wrong truck cab and nearly lost them Natasha, and Tony had gotten miserably turned around in some cavern system beneath the Hydra hideout), it had been a full success. Wanda had even whooped when they returned to the Helicarrier and they were told that they'd done a bang-up job. Her high-five with Steve and then Natasha caused a full round of them from Thor, who never did take 'no' for an answer when it was time to revel.

The one storm cloud in the room seemed to be Clint, who had chosen the highest point in the main deck and parked there. Hiding out and absently glaring at the small, makeshift party below him, his displeasure didn't go unnoticed. When Natasha clapped him on the shoulder, Pietro realized absently that he wasn't the only one that recognized just who was missing. “You should go tell him it's time to get out of those sweaty leathers.” She spoke gently, a slight smirk on her red lips, “He'll probably need someone who's more gentle with him than I would be.” The knowing look she shot her friend only had Pietro's stomach flipping and falling into his feet. Did he really want to mess with the Hawk when he looked so... Irate? Well, it wasn't like Pietro was known for his patience or ability to think clearly when he wanted something. His lover's silence wasn't so strange as the fact that he couldn't seem to wipe the scowl off his face, but he was sure he could help. Zipping up to the current perch that Clint had taken up, Pietro leaned on the railing with a small, nervous smile on his face. It was the same look he wore when he didn't want to talk about something but knew that he had to, and the second that Clint gave a cursory glance over, he knew that he'd have to give in and try. If he didn't, the impossible task of getting Pietro to trust him would have been for naught. At any moment, the precarious precipice that he stood on with the kid could bowl over and he'd be up shit creek without a paddle and without Pietro to keep him company. “What's up, kid?” The tone made Pietro flinch, and Clint reached out to take his hand in his own gloved one, gently stroking his thumb over the other's knuckles. “Sorry. What's on your mind?” “You.” While the answer was cocky as usual, his voice quaked slightly and he looked away, like he might just as quickly retreat as he had arrived. “Who put bee in your underwear?” Snorting a little at the word choice, Clint rolled his eyes. “It's not like you'd really understand it, babe.” He muttered, “It's not like you can just lose your powers.” It took approximately a second before Pietro was sitting beside the elder man, dangling his legs from their tower, leaning against his arm. The concerned look burning his eyes into the other's hands told Clint he caught the words just as easily as if they hadn't been so vague. “You lost your bow.” “I did.” Glancing back over, Clint couldn't help the beginnings of a tiny smile pulling at the corners of his lips, and he had to turn his glare back to Tony having another little spat with Steve to keep his sour mood. Whatever it was they were fighting over, Clint figured one honest talk would get them to the other side of it. Maybe. Then again, knowing those two, it would never happen. Still, his eyes found Pietro's little scowl once more and he saw his own arm wrap around the kid's shoulders more than he registered it happening. Tugging him in closer, he waited for the words to fall from the other's lips, letting him pick them out all on his own. “That is like losing arm, no?” He finally asked, his sour expression only making Clint chuckle a little bit. Honestly, the kid was too cute when he was mad at things, it was why Clint could never keep his hands to himself. “Yeah, I guess it is.” Clint nodded in response, pressing his temple to Pietro's, “And I can't believe I lost it. But... I guess there are worse things to lose.” The quiet, tight-lipped frown that overcame him as he looked at the white-haired nineteen year old beside him made Pietro go stiff. Why did he constantly have to bring that up? It hadn't been a good day for anyone. “You did not lose me.” The definitive tone told Clint he didn't want to talk about it, but sometimes he had to get those feelings out when he had them. “But I could have.” “And you would not have known what you were losing.” Pietro added after a moment, “You have lost a piece of you, now.” “I thought I lost a piece of myself in Sokovia.” Clint sighed, shaking his head a little, “The bow can be replaced, I just need to talk to Bruce and Fury.” He informed easily, “It won't be that hard to get another one.” It's impossible to find another person like you. Absently, Clint's fingers worked through that soft, pale hair, trailing down the kid's shoulder, chest, and to his hip. Beneath his track suit, Pietro swore he could feel the initials in his hip throbbing, and he forced himself to look away. CB had always thrown him for a loop until he'd started to come to terms with the fact that the old man he kept bothering in the forest was, indeed, his soulmate. “I get the point.” Pietro muttered, pouting as his voice grew louder, “But it should not--” “It does matter. Now, hush. We need to go get ready for whatever bullshit party Tony and Thor are cooking up, right?” A smile was on his lips as he nuzzled his cheek into the other's shoulder, the elder man feeling oddly better about everything despite himself. Clint always found it odd how he would end up comforting Pietro when he'd been the upset one in the first place, but he didn't doubt the effectiveness of it. Pietro's tried and true remedy for Clint being upset worked far too well sometimes. He'd simply have to work harder to get Pietro to think about something, anything other than the track he'd accidentally ended up on. A party and a good amount of attention would do his soulmate some good. Kissing his temple, he popped up beside him and held out a hand. “Let's go, alright, pidge?” “Alright...” Pietro took his hand and rose to his feet, letting Clint help him to the nearest way down. Once his feet were on solid ground, he didn't let a breath of air come between them; even when they were changing. Really, sometimes the kid was indescribably clingy. Still in the back of Clint's mind, his missing bow wore on his ability to have a good time. Even if Pietro was doing a fairly good job of distracting him, he couldn't quite get his head wrapped around what he was going to do; It took him a solid two hours before he sought out Bruce to discuss the thoughts he'd had on his new bow. Pietro knew better than to get in the way, so he opted to chat at Wanda and Natasha in Sokovian instead, never letting his eyes drive away from his lover. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ AN: I'm finally feeling okay enough to write some again, so let's see what all I can get done. I still have no internet, so getting donations via Ko-Fi (Sunshinecackle) would be great! It's okay if you can't, but maybe promoing me would help! We have a goal of $75 to get the internet set up and everything, and if we could do that ASAP, it would be so great. We currently have no money at all. Translations: Raz na raz ne prikhoditsya. - Russian – From time to time, it does not happen. Prompt: N5 – Lost Bow

#Clint Barton Bingo #MCU Fanfic #MCU Fanfiction #MCU Hawksilver #MCU Clint Barton #MCU Pietro Maximoff

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dreammutual-remade · 6 years

Text

high school!mark

request: highschool!mark if u love me plspls

word count: 5.5k

a/n: lucky that I love u anon hehehehe !!!!! also wOW I didnt mean to make this so god damn long itS REALLY JUST THESE GOD DAMN HIGH SCHOOL AUS IM WEAK FOR THEM OKAY. look at this cutie hOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO RESIST

mark, renjun, jeno, donghyuck, jaemin, chenle, jisung

warnings: the usual intermittent cussing and probably an inappropriate joke or two

this au is my Ultimate Weakness it makes me soft as hell alright

………………….

LETS DIVE IN

okay so your mom has a job that forces your family to move around….. A LOT

and while you’ve gotten used to it for the most part it still sucks having to leave people behind and make completely new friends once every couple of years

this time you’re moving to a new school for your SENIOR YEAR and you’re livid

bc like ??? it’s senior year and you have exactly zero (0) friends since you’re new,,, yet again

you Threw A Fit when you found out but your mom was like shut up you ingrate soon you’ll be in college and won’t even have to worry about it

so you, an ingrate, shut up :/

you move in a month before school starts and the house is nice and your room is cute so that’s a plus !!!!!

you hang up some pictures and organize all your cute little trinkets you’ve collected over the years aw

you’ve even got a lil succulent garden growing on your windowsill

ITS CUTE AS HELL OKAY

alright so you’re gonna go explore around town because you , don’t know where anything is and you wanna find some good spots to hang

you take the bus into the middle of town because who tf is tryna drive themselves amirite ladies

support ur local bus driver

anywhom this isn’t a HUGE town but it’s one of those cute towns where you can pretty much walk anywhere you need to go

(god i wish that were me)

so you spend all day just, walkin

you find a library and pick up some books …….

both for decoration and reading okay

and you find a couple of restaurants and write them down to try later along with some coffee shops and whatnot

eventually you’re tired and prolly a lil sweaty bc it’s summer and you’re outside and ugh

so you find a nice big park and a tree and sit down at the base of it to read and mindlessly sketch things in the margins of your book

whEN OUT OF NOWHERE

someone shouts

“HEY WATCH OUT”

and you look up just in time to dodge a sOCCER BALL HURTLING TOWARDS YOUR FACE

it bounces off the tree and rolls a couple feet away

“uhhhh holy shit” - you

you just kind of sit there astonished for 5 seconds before you get up to get the ball and look around for who saved your LIFE

and there’s boy jogging toward you looking extremely embarrassed

you meet him halfway to hand him the ball and he’s like

“oh mY GOD i’m so sorry i told them to settle down but they never listen to me and jisung just ??? doesn’t know how to not take everything seriously and he lost and got pissed and kicked it and we didn’t even kNOW you were over here and also i’m so sorry”

you smile and tell him it’s fine and hand him the ball

you go to get back to your tree and he’s like hey uh you there uh wait up

god he’s awkward

and you turn around to face him with an expectant look

“so um, what’s your name? i haven’t seen you around here before and like in case i ever gotta make this up to you you know ??”

cute

you tell him your name and stick out your hand to shake and he grabs it very hesitantly and tells you his name is mark

he has , very warm hands and they’re only slightly bigger than yours but that’s still cUTE

MARK HAS BABY HANDS I DARE U TO SAY HE DOESNT

he says he hopes you enjoy your book and he’ll make sure the boys don’t disturb you anymore than they already have

you wave as he goes and he gives you a smile over his shoulder and his cheeks are tinged pink and wOw this boy is a cutie patootie

you go back to your reading but now instead of doodling you’re just writing his name or drawing his big doe eyes or his smooth hands

(((((let’s pretend we’re all good at drawing okay god knows i can’t do much more than a stick figure)))))

the boys leave after an hour or two and you leave pretty soon after then because the sun is setting and you gotta be home for dinner

basically your mom wants to make sure you aren’t kidnapped and/or lost in a new town

which, to be fair, is not that unlikely

you have your headphones in and you’re leaned against the bus window half asleep as you go

bitch wake up youRE GONNA MISS YOUR STOP

it’s the same bus driver who saw you get on and honestly there aren’t a lot of people on the bus so he makes sure you get off

“hey you, girl back there, hEY! this is your stop girly”

you thank him profusely and tip him because uhhhh u gotta get home and like Not Lost

you skip home with your bag of books and miscellaneous items you found at the thrift store!!!

you bought a little figurine of a dragon and she’s beautiful her name is saraphina because why not

that’s completely irrelevant i’m so sorry

i have ADHD

anywhom

you walk in and you’re all like hey momma !!! how goes it !!:3

and your mom is Sus™️ because why are you in such a good mood

and you’re like !!! cause i had a good day okay love u bye i’m going to my rOOM

don’t let her question anymore or else she’ll dig out that you met a Cute Boy

you go to your room and get out all your purchases and organize them while you still have the motivation to do so

and yeah

you use one of the blank notes to start like a lil drawing diary of sorts ???? like just to draw stuff in whenever you’re inspired or you see something pretty

and you definitely saw smth pretty today ;))))))))

hint: ITS MARK

you try to draw him from memory but it doesn’t look quite right and like :(((((( how sad is that what if you don’t even see him again

the rest of the month passes pretty quickly in the same fashion

by now you’ve befriended the bus driver and he tells you all the cool secret nooks and crannies of town for you to go find

he’s also your bff pretty much he always tells you about his daughter and all the cute things she does and you just talk about your life in general and he gives you advice

congrats you’ve unlocked Wise Uncle

he gives you directions to this teeny TINY flower shop where you befriend the old lady who works there by bringing a muffin everytime you go by

she trades you for a seasonal flower and makes a big deal out of tucking it behind your ear herself

basically you find all the cute old people in town and make them your friend because.

THATS CUTE

ADDED BONUS OF LIKE 17 PARENT FIGURES TO GIVE YOU ADVICE

this is accidentally straying into art hoe territory i hope y’all are okay w/ that

school is starting really soon and you’re nervous but also used to this so it doesn’t affect you as bad as normally

also you did meet some people so you aren’t going in with no friends but like, pretty close to no friends

on the first day of school you ride the bus and you see ???? mark ????? on your bus ????????

so you get on and do your daily greeting of the bus driver

his daughter lost her first tooth AW

you fake cry and he says “mood” and you lose it because you’re pushing internet culture onto this unsuspecting middle aged man skdkdkkd

you pat him on the shoulder as you walk back to find a seat but there are none because for some reason the bus is busy this early in the morning ????

you wouldn’t know lmao summer sleep schedule had you up at 10 at the earliest

so you go to stand and hold onto one of the poles in the center

(nearby our boy mark LEE)

mark looks up from his phone

these god damn millennials always on that damn phone

and he sees you and he’s like wHOA what’s up uhhh Soccer Ball Girl

and nice you remembered his name bUT HE DIDNT REMEMBER YOURS

but then he’s like nahhhh just kidding i remember ur name hey y/n !!!

you talk otw to school and find out you’re both seniors at the same school and how you’re excited for sports games and like, GRADUATING

mark keeps trying to offer you his seat but you refuse and he pouts everytime you say no :((((

good god just take the seat look at the sad baby boy :((((((((((((

there is an, occurrence

at one point the bus goes over a bump and you stumble a little and mark reaches up to catch you before you literally fall on him

his hands fly out and grab you by the hips to steady you since he’s sitting and you’re standing and he can’t exactly reach your shoulders sO YEA

or at least that’s his explanation in his head huehuehuehe

his hands linger for MAYBE 10 seconds before he whips them back into his pockets and blushes while you thank him

you: are also blushing

the bus driver: completely did that on purpose

when you get off the bus your Second Dad tells you good luck and pats you on the head and mark is like ???? do you know him

and you’re like yeah that’s my man maurice we’re buds

and he’s like ???? i’ve rode that bus all my life to school and i’m not buds with him wtf :/

“srry you’re not as lovable as me!! jealousy is a disease <3”

and he laughs his dorky laugh

you highkey are smiling so big because this boy is so cute and he’s walking close enough that your shoulders brush every once in a while and he has a silly laugh and AW

as you walk into the school marks group of Boys starts waving him over excitedly and he turns in their direction but then stops when he sees you aren’t following

“hey whatcha doin???”

“well uhhh those are Your Boys you know and i’m, i don’t, really, uh they don’t know me”

“aw cmon they’ll love you!!! look ill just introduce you and if they’re terrible and annoying you can leave”

“........ i gue-“

but he’s already grabbed your hand and is pulling you over to them

“sup fellas this is y/n and she just moved here this year so don’t be too overwhelming.”

the smaller one with the highish voice chimes in

“aww but overwhelming is my only setting”

“then just don’t be yourself, chenle”

“heYYY it’s that girl i almost killed in the park !!! so sorry about that by the way”

he introduces them to you one by one and they all shake your hand

jisung is the one with the big ass yaoi hands and also the one who almost ended your young life

jaemin is the one with pretty smile

jeno is the one with the squishy eyes

renjun is the Art Hoe of the group you can just tell

he’s wearing some got damn overalls you gotta befriend him immediately

donghyuck is the one with beautiful skin and a v high voice you’re highkey like hey but can you dROP THE SKINCARE ROUTINE and he’s like “i just wash my face every day xoxo :*”

you quickly learn who is a piece of shit and who isn’t

you figure out who has classes with you and then set off for the day !!

mark has gym and economics with you but those are after lunch :(((

he squeezes your shoulder before he leaves and says good luck though so you’ll survive

you have art with renjun first and this boy is your bestie already

he’s such a sarcastic shit and he too likes drawing random things and vandalizing school textbooks with artistically correct memes

he also has the AUDACITY

“so, you and mark already ;););)(;);)))”

“i uh don’t know what you mean by that”

“you SO do!!!!! you guys walked into school together everyone probably already thinks you’re a thing”

“oh shit really??? ah i feel so bad”

“is that a bad thing???”

“i mean yeah i’m not tryna Tarnish mark’s reputation”

“that is some self hatred bs he would be lucky to have you !!!!”

“renjun you don’t even know me that well yet”

“i know enOUGH”

you just uhh change the subject which renjun def notices but like

who cares

renjun apparently also goes to the same flower shop as you !!!

you find out because you see him drawing the front of it and you’re like heY i’ve been there my girl edna works there !!!!! she insist i call her grandma tho

and he’s all oh sHIT that’s my girl too !!!!!!

long story short edna is now your shared grandmother

now THAT is some uwu shit

you go about your day and it’s lunchtime and yOU uh don’t know where to sit :(

you see a girl that you met who works at the little coffee shop you like so you set off in her direction and you’re almost there when jeno and jaemin walk up and sling an arm around your shoulder from either side

“hEY BUDDY” -jeno

“SUP SQUIRT” -jaemin

and they start steering you in another direction towards their own table

“god of all nicknames you had to give me sQUIRT”

“yes it’s because you’re cute and small like squirtle”

“that’s a god damn reach if i’ve ever seen one but okay”

you get there and they practically TOSS you into the seat next to mark

he winces and gives you and apologetic pat on the back before starting the conversation

“alright so who actually did the summer reading”

as the table bursts into Absolute Ruckus you just kind of sit back and watch

mark notices you being quiet and while renjun and chenle are arm wrestling he leans over to quietly be like

“hey you doin okay over there? are they too much”

“oh not at all i’m just takin it in lmao”

“yeah that’s understandable. they’re easily the most entertaining group of people you’ll ever meet but also i’ve wanted to strangle every single one of them at least once”

“what are you 30??? you talk about them like you’re their mom”

“i mean someone’s gotta do it”

you and mark talk all throughout lunch and head to gym together since that’s next

exercising right after eating ??? sounds like a GREAT plan thanks so much public school system !!!!

you go to pull out your bag of gym clothes but ??? all you’ve got is shorts ?????

S H I T

you start whining because you’re like aWW i’m gonna get in trouble :(((((

and he’s like here i have like 12 shirts in here because i always bring too many and then leave some when i got soccer practice i gotchu

(he gives you the clean shirt that hasn’t been sitting in his locker <3333 what a guy)

you thank him proFUSELY and then go to the girls locker room to change

the shirt is too big and you don’t wanna look like a Bag so you tie a lil knot in it in the front

you don’t look like a thot tho you just look Cute As Fuck

some girl in the locker room lets you borrow a hair tie and off we go !!!

it’s the first day so everyone literally just stretches and sits around talking

you’ve hashtag LOST mark and you don’t have any friends yet so you’re just chillin talking to the girl who gave you a hair tie because she seems nice and you got nothin better to do

you’re explaining to her how to take care of a succulent /properly/ when mark catches a basketball that was headed right for you yelling a watch it !!!! over his shoulder

he turns to you and giggles a little, nudging your foot with his

“you’re just a danger magnet aren’t you”

“i mean danger is my middle name so”

“uGH get your ass over here away from all those freshman hoodlums who think they can play”

you wave bye to your friend because there’s literal fear in her eyes at the sight of mark ??

you ask her what’s wrong later and she’s like oh it’s not him i just have a crippling fear of boys

(that’s a mood)

you and mark pass a volleyball back and forth and fuck around pretty much all period

this is actually the one (1) sport he isn’t good at thank GOD you were worried he had no flaws

at the end of the class you ask him if he wants his shirt back and he says, and i quote,

“nah you and your thot knot can keep it, looks cuter on you anyways”

you smack his arm for calling you a thot but then thank him anyways for the shirt and for calling you cute :))))))))

econ passes the same way except normal clothing and no sports

although mark does throw a wadded up piece of paper on you that says u want 2 hang w the boys n me after school ? if yes then breathe if no do a backflip

this headass boy

you throw it back so it bounces off his forehead and then nod to confirm you will

you don’t have any of the boys in your last class and you don’t where to meet up so you just kind of loiter by your locker since jeno’s is pretty close to yours and maybe they’ll meet here ????

luckily jisung spots you and is like hey what r u doin here aren’t u hanging with us after school??? cmon

you follow him out to the parking lot where they’re all gathered around jeno and jaemins vehicles because apparently they’re the only ones with actual cars

rip

they start waving too excitedly when they see you and mark smiles all big

wooOOO baby boy already has a crush on you :3

they’ve apparently already decided to go to chenles house because apparently he’s fuckin loaded

you don’t believe that for a sECOND because he’s wearing crocs and an old ass polo shirt but

we’ll see

you mark and renjun ride with jaemin while the Babies ride with jeno since he is able to ignore them being crackheads in the backseat and drive his vehicle without crashing

apparently they’ve cause multiple vehicular accidents ??? possibly the reason renjun doesn’t have a car ???????

who knows

y’all have a blast in jaemins car tho playing tokyo drift from the third fast and furious movie if u haven’t heard that shit plEASE GO LISTEN WHAT A SONG HEHEHHEHHEHE

you pull into this BIG ASS house and you’re like no fucking way dude

and everyone else in the car simultaneously says

“i know right ???”

y’all pull in and go inside and it’s real nice holy SHIT

chenle comes in cackling followed closely be jisung and more sedately by jeno who looks ready to fckin die

you pat him on the shoulder and go you did well, soldier

he salutes solemnly before breaking out into the smile

y’all know the one

you UWU right there on the spot but hold yourself back from poking his cheek and cooing

chenle then SCREECHES and yells

“WHO IS TRYNA PLAY JUST DANCE”

and everyone crowds into his living room

somehow the couch is big enough to fit all of you comfortably that’s fckin impressive

you play just dance for 3 whole ass hours and now you’re Tired and Ready To Go Home

there’s a bus stop nearby and you insist upon walking since jaemin already have you a ride here and you didn’t even have gas money to give him :(((

mark goes to since you have to catch the same bus

you hum as you skip around the sidewalk and he walks behind you smiling fondly while you twirl around

he recognizes the song and whistles along and wow !!!!

Harmony™️

when you get to the stop you’re like 5 mins early

so to entertain yourselves you play rock paper scissors and each time the winner gets to flick the loser on the forehead

mark is a sweet boy so he flicks softly but you go all out

wouldn’t be surprised if he had a bruise tmrw girly u need to chill

you sit on the bus together when it arrives since there’s actually room now and he slumps down low until his head is pretty much rested on your shoulder

(our man maurice sees and is like GET IT GIRL but only so you notice and you make threatening hand motions at him)

you’re not sure if he’s asleep so you stay extra still just in case

and no one needs to know you rested your cheek on top of his head

but when it gets to your stop you’re like mark? mark lee??? mork ???? wake up ??? and you nudge him a little with your shoulder and he sits up and rubs his eyes aW

he slow blinks at you and goes

“hm?”

and you’re like i uh gotta go now

and he’s like :/// okay i’ll see you tomorrow and stands up and gives you a half hug before you go

maurice is DYING in the front you’re going to kill him

you walk home with a smile on your face and again your mom is suspicious of your good mood but you’re like aw it’s nothin just had a good day at school made lots of friends !!!!!!

as summer turns into fall you make more friends but you mostly hang out with the boys because they’re funny and nice to you and also Mark is there and we love our boy

you guys all attend football games together and go absolutely ALL OUT for whatever the theme is

for example: the theme was halloween and you all dressed as god damn SMURFS

it was legendary there was not one bit of you all that wasn’t covered in blue paint

jisung almost fought some girl who thought he was from the movie Avatar until everyone was like jisung cHILL OUT ITS NOT HER FAULT YOURE VERY TALL AND COMPLETELY BLUE

and well

can’t argue with that

it gets chillier though so you all bring blankets and cuddle most of the games

all of the boys suspiciously aren’t cold at first until you and mark share a blanket

they’re so obvious GOD

with each time y’all share you get more relaxed around each other until eventually mark has one arm slung around you and your legs are hooked over one of his thighs while y’all Snuggle

renjun waggles his eyebrows at you every five minutes and you discreetly give him the finger every time

little ASSHOLE

college applications are due like. right now

you all apply to a nice university close by as a backup/safe place and then apply to more brazy places just to see if you can get in

everyone’s been real stressed lately so you’re like !!!!! hey imma throw a friendsgiving party !!! yeehaw !!!!!!!!!

and you invite all of them over

“everyone bring smth and i’ll bake a ham or smth,,, i swear to GOD if all of you show up with store-bought pumpkin pie. i will kill you and then myself”

“what’s with you and pumpkin pie?”

“jUST. don’t”

((((srry i’m projecting my hatred of pumpkin pie onto u reader heheehehheh))))

everyone comes over and it’s really chilly so you have a fire in the fireplace and you have a couple of your gal pals over too

your mom is nice enough to leave y’all alone for the night and she’s not hurt since it’s not real thanksgiving

we stan moms

you bring out the ham and someone has brought green beans and mark ,,,, tHAT ANGEL he brought cornbread stuffing do y’all know what i’m talking abt

OOO THAT STUFF IS GOOD

and there’s sweet potatoes and apple pie and all the Thanksgiving Essentials

jisung wanted to be a dick so he brought cranberry jelly

“why don’t you have some:) cranberry preserves:) , jisung” -you, every 30 seconds

everyone sits down to eat and it’s LOUD so you’re like shut UP !!!!!!!!!!

“every1 say smth ur thankful for :3333”

“my family !!!!”

“you guys <3”

“awW BOOO” - everyone, while throwing things at jaemin

“my life !!”

“that i’m happy”

“gay” -chenle

“minecraft”

anyways no one took it seriously until it got to mark

“i’m grateful y/n moved here :))))))”

everyone goes KSKDDIDI and you blush and you’re like okay ily mark JSKKD

everyone EATS A LOT and then you go sit in a pile in the living room

you go to make hot chocolate for everyone and when you come back it’s , interesting how there’s only room for you next to mark . hm

you pass out the hot chocolate and everyone reaches Maximum Sleepytime

at this point you’re too tired to give a fuck and you just flop onto the couch next to mark and curl up into his side

he puts his arm around you to pull you close and this mf presses a tiny barely there kiss to your temple

you look up and like talk with your eyes

did u just

i did

yeah

and then you just settle back down

it’s too crowded in here for any Moves to be Made

bUT YALL BEST BELIEVE WHEN ALL THESE YOUNGINS GET OUT UR HOUSE

you’ve got the karate kid on bc ??? who doesn’t love the karate kid and all of your cutie friends are asleep in various places

but once it gets super late you start waking people up and going hey i love you but your mom called mine like 8 times you gotta gO

you make sure everyone is awake fully if they’re driving and to text you when they got home safe

at long last

you’re alone

in your house

with mark

actually where is mark

mark has disappeared ?????

you start looking around for him and find him in your room ???

“you snoopin thru my things ??!?!??”

he jumps and is like uHH but you’re like nah you’re fine idc

so he continues and he was really just lookin at what kind of books you have and the little drawings and paintings and knick knacks everywhere

you just sit on your bed and observe him

let’s be real he’s nice to look at and you’d be perfectly fine doing this for uhhh the rest of your life

he pulls a book off your shelf and starts flipping through it until he pauses at a page

and his face blooms into this big smile and he looks hella giddy

and you’re like uhh hey whatcha lookin at there bud

and he just keep smiling and it’s a little smug now wtf

“when were you reading this?”

“oh uh i don’t know i got it this summer at that cute little bookshop”

“was it, by chance, the day we met?”

“i mean maybe??? why ????”

and he shows you the page and it’s tHAT oNE WHERE YOU WERE DOODLING BITS OF HIM AND WRITING HIS NAME ALL OVER IT

FUCK !!!!!!!

you immediately turn tomato red and snatch the book in to hold it tightly to your chest

“uhhh i do that with uhhhh eVerYONE I MEET”

“aw i thought i was special:((((”

he’s creeping closer to you this whole time until he’s INCHES AWAY

he gently pulls the book out of your hands and places it aside before grabbing your wrists and uncrossing your arms

“personally, i think it’s really cute”

you blush even more this man knows what he’s doing

you mumble a thanks with your eyes trained on his fuzzy socks what a dork

he releases one of your wrists to push your chin up so he can look you in the eyes

“do you really do that with everyone you meet?”

“,,,,,,, no it’s just you”

“alright cool”

and then he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you close til you’re pressed together chest to chest AW

he nudges his nose against yours and you close your eyes because your god daMN HEART IS POUNDING AND YOU CANT LOOK DIRECTLY INTO THOSE BIG PUPPY EYES

he presses the sweetest and gentlest of kisses to each cheek and then to the top of your nose

he presses one last lingering kiss on your forehead before he tilts his chin down to press your lips together

it’s so soft and innocent wow i’m going to SHED TEARS WRITING THIS

and he pulls away and you press your face into his neck in embarrassment

he chuckles a lil and rubs your back, leaning his cheek against your head

“hey, you down there”

you say “yeah?” but your voice is muffled by his neck and it’s more like eh ???

“my girlfriend y/n will you be ???”

what the fuck

you pull your head back so you can look at his face which is turning steadily redder

“uh what”

“shIT uh i meant will you uh bemygirlfriend”

your confused expression turns into a shit eating grin and you’re like

“what was that :)))) i didn’t hear you :)))))”

he groans and rests his forehead on your shoulder and pitifully whines out

“please be my girlfriend :(((((“

you pick his face up and hold it between your palms and he pouts playfully

“well how could i say no to that face”

and you smooch him right on those lil pouted lips

“yes i’ll be your girlfriend”

he smiles real big and smooshes you against him aw

wow so now you’re mark lee’s gf

LUCKY BITCH

lowkey you get a few threats but as soon as mark catches wind of that he stands on the statue in front of the school and announces that if anyone has a problem with you they’ve got a problem with him !!!!

and he looks like: ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

you drag him down while apologizing to everyone in the general vicinity

mark is. veRY CLINGY NOW

i mean no complaints here it’s just

wow

you’ll be standing at your locker when BAM mark is wrapped around you from behind and you get a hey baby how’s ur day right in your ear

in gym class he restrains himself since the coaches are always like LEE KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF

but he always whines after and is like

:((((( but you look so cute in my shirt i wanna squish you

whenever mark comes over you force him to let you draw him at least once

each time it gets easier since you’ve started to memorize the details of his face and the knuckles of his hands and the shape of his shoulders

a lot of times he just comes over to watch movies and talk

he’s not an eloquent guy

(“you all look like pretty grass :)))” - mark lee)

but he gets what he needs to say out and he enjoys listening to you talk about whatever’s on your mind

you’ve started a glow in the dark star sticker collection to put on your ceiling and each time he comes over you put a constellation up there

so you’ll lay in bed and turn off the lights and just stare at the ceiling and try to name them all

soon you’ll just get sleepy though and press your face into his chest

he uwu’s every time :((((

after he’s done being astonished by his Baby™️ he’ll wrap his arms around you and stroke a hand up and down your spine wow

Real Relaxation Hours

your mom will come home and find y’all asleep and then SHE uwu’s and it’s just one big cute MESS

he loves to kiss you right as he’s leaving like he’ll lay one on you then RUN to the bus stop

p.s. maurice is on y’all every day saying he called it AY

his other favorite kisses are when he catches you off guard and just turns you around and kisses you and you’re like

I’m Confused But I Like This

lots of sweet pecks throughout the day and then longer slower stuff when you’re home and alone and relaxing

leaves hickeys on your neck literally just to be annoying

it’s oKAY THO DONT TELL HIM YOU LIKE IT

months pass and youve said your first “i love you’s” to each other and renjun is always like so when y’all gettin married huh

you both SMACK him simultaneously

but lowkey you would marry mark he’s the best and you love him so wHY NOT

but it’s early and you know that and you’re happy with what you have now :))))))

pls love and support our hardworking baby mark lee he is doing his best and i love him goodnight

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sparklyjojos · 6 years

Text

Some final commentary on Cosmic

which turned into yet another analysis of JDC, Tsukumojuku and Jorge Joestar because I have zero self-restraint. Half this post is searching for overarching themes and wacky theories, have fun with my ramblings I guess

[big spoilers for Cosmic and Tsukumojuku, not really for Jorge Joestar]

While I decided to finish Cosmic first, the recommended reading order is Cosmic (1st half) -> Joker -> Cosmic (2nd half). I guess this better ties both books together and helps avoid some Joker spoilers that are in Cosmic. The new edition even encourages it by labeling the tomes of Cosmic with Ryu and Sui, and Joker with Sei and Ryo. So you’re supposed to read “Seiryo in Ryusui” *rimshot* The cover art is also meant to be put together in that order (notice that the last cover also connects to the first though, and you can try putting the shorter edges together too):

On the book’s theme, and some meta:

I’m actually glad I’ve read Tsukumojuku before this, as it gave me a solid grip on the meta and the ridiculous detectiving. It made me LOVE the very ending, especially the “walking towards the end of the story with this tiny last moment lasting forever” part -- in hindsight of Tsukumojuku’s ending I almost cried at this point. The meaning’s a bit different, of course: Tsukumojuku has the triplets realize they should leave their daydream, and so it was both a sad and joyful ending, with them trying to stretch their last moments being ‘Tsukumojuku’. Cosmic has Juku and Yasha being a little apprehensive but determined to reach ‘the end of the story’, and at the end, they’re happy and joking around while (wittingly or not?) walking into eternity as the book ends, and with it their existence (...which doesn’t sound nearly as dramatic when you know there's a sequel).

Adding to that, I believe the last words imply the author (=the heavens forever watching over the characters) is joyful about the end (’the heavens themselves laughing’). Note that when Juku (or is it?) first appears in the book, in that post office scene, right after the 19 consecutive tragedies we just had to read through, we learn that ‘the heavens have been crying, but now it was as if they started laughing’, and Juku looks up at the sky and smiles. The end of the epilogue has the second-person someone (the reader?) be sad about the book coming to an end, with statements like ‘just two paragraphs remain until the end’ (and there really are only two short paragraphs in the book left after this!), and describing the heavy rain that starts in those two paragraphs as ‘the heavens crying’ (so... the sadness of both the reader and the author?). Finishing a good book, whether as a writer or a reader, is indeed both a joyful and a sad event. Similarly, the detectives are all happy and inexplicably sad when Juku claims the case has been solved. (There’s an echo of this theme even in Jorge Joestar, when with mere 15 pages left until the end of the book Jorge cries because ‘this adventure’s almost over’.)

I love the reccurring existential theme having to do with being a fictional character. It wasn’t as in-your-face as in Tsukumojuku, but it was there. While I skipped that in recaps, one of the locked room stories features a delusional man who believes he’s just a character in a novel. While scary, this belief is somewhat comforting too, and he notes it’d be nice to have a role to fulfill; to die with the sense you achieved all that you were meant to do, that The Author loved and appreciated you for who you were, and that you’re going to live eternally through a novel. (Jorge Joestar has Tsukumojuku mention how having a role to fulfill under Beyond’s care gave him comfort -- same thing, really.) But the character understands that all stories will eventually undergo destruction, and dreads it. Of course, the final message of the book, strengthened by the final events (the cult’s failure, Shiranui dying right after Juku’s birthday, and even --the book itself ending--), is that we have to accept that nothing can last forever, and the old will be replaced by the new, stories included.

When Juku and Yasha revealed the culprit’s initials, I honestly thought that he’d turn out to be the author, and the reason why they got different initials was that Juku saw the pen name (Seiryoin Ryusui) and Yasha the real name (Kanai Hidetaka). Since Yasha seemed shocked that Juku said ‘S’, I thought it meant that Yasha saw a full name but neither of the initials was ‘S’. I also thought Otohime’s advice -- to ‘look at the events from a distance’, to ‘withdraw yourself from events’ -- actually meant you have to look at the story from a distance... that is, lean back and look at the book you’re holding, which has the author’s name on the cover. Later, the sudden fourth wall break during the press conference scene, with the author prompting the reader to think carefully about who the Locked Room Lord may be, and writing his signature right under that question, only made me more sure. And there were a bunch of scenes before the Big Reveal in which other JDC characters reacted to the solution with feeling as if their world was destroyed, or getting drunk, or stressing out rather hard, so I expected they got hit with existential crisis upon learning The Truth, and that Juku will just go full meta and say that the culprit is the author: the one who really designed and 'committed’ the murders. Though with the book ending as it did, it’s not a stretch to say that Seiryoin really IS confirmed to be the true Locked Room Lord. In a way.

Other random comments:

This book is positively untranslatable. It features stuff like extensive kanji wordplays; messages in Caesar cipher but using the dictionary order of hiragana; deciphering a number as if it was an old-fashioned pager message; or reading the final message by putting the first syllable of the last kanji of the victims’ names together. And that damn Matsuo Bashou pun. All the name puns, really.

The language is rather hard, definitely harder than Maijo’s works. I think I’ll take some time to get better Japanese skills before going for Joker. (The JDC book I expect to enjoy the most is The Simons’ Case, though -- young Ajiro dadding over solving a case with kid Juku sounds amazing, and it’s a lot of fans’ fave)

For some reason, the main characters sure like to have the ‘castle’ kanji (城) in their names, like 鴉城蒼司 (Ajiro Souji), 龍宮城之介 (Ryuuguu Jounosuke), and 天城漂馬 (Amagi Hyouma). ...I can’t help but notice that a certain 城字ジョースター (Jouji/Jorge Joestar) would fit right in, lol. He pretty much is a meta-detective already, what with all the confidence and insight he gets from his Beyond.

I live for Ajiro’s and Juku’s relations. LOVE this stressed detective dad being proud of his ridiculously kind detective son.

Unexpectedly I also loved the friendship between Juku and Yasha. (With added tears because, y’know. Inugami Yasha. Investigating with Tsukumo Juku. Being friends and stuff.)

I like Ryuuguu Jounosuke quite a lot, both because of his character / reasoning skills, and because he’s as canonically aroace as he can be in a 90s book. not that you’d know that with all the Hikimiya/Ryuuguu yaoi fanart on pixiv

Unfortunately, I can’t praise Seiryoin for good rep as he’s miserable with other representation. The locked room chapters feature the depraved rapist bisexual trope, then a Bury Your Lesbians trope, and then this weird thing where a young guy has a gay crush and concludes that he must have become gay because he was abused by his mother (???)... but as it later turns out, in reality (ie. not in the manuscript) the object of the crush was a woman, so the gay part didn’t even happen. The fuq? Also there’s a one-scene-only black woman officer who’s only there so we can be told how physically strong and intimidating she is and I’m not sure how I should feel about that. I’m also pissed off that when a male detective uses vague reasoning out of nowhere, more a supernatural feeling than anything else, he gets called a meta-detective and is oh ah so elite and amazing!, but when Nemu does it it gets called ‘woman’s intuition’ and ‘fuzzy reasoning’ and she’s not considered a meta-detective, fucking really? (Maybe it is a little different, idk, she wasn’t detectiving a lot in this so we didn’t really see what she’s capable of)

On the other hand, I liked that the way Juku encouraged Nemu to become a detective involved using his connections to arrange meetings with other disabled detectives, so she could talk frankly with them and get a feel for how high-tier detectiving while disabled (esp. in terms of sight-related disabilities) is like. That’s a nice detail.

Speaking of him... Tsukumo Juku is pretty Mary Sue-ish in this, which I don’t mind (and I would be more surprised if it didn’t turn out to be intentional later), but I can imagine other readers not really liking him that much. I’ve read that Juku unfortunately doesn’t really get deeper characterization until the Carnival books, where we learn fun little stuff about him, eg. he’s horrible at cooking, and his ringtone is the opening for Manga Nippon Mukashi Banashi (an old anime introducing little kids to folktales). (I’m wondering whether or not the Kintaro thing in Jorge Joestar is related to this somehow? I don’t have many spoilers for Carnival, maybe there’s more folktales references... aside from the Ryuuguu family’s names referencing Urashima Taro, that is. And now I wonder why Jorge gets a folktale-related kids song stuck in his head so easily hmmm)

It was never explained who sent the manuscript to JDC. So far, judging by the scene with the beautiful androgynous person at the post office, and retroactively by the entire Story-sending mess in Tsukumojuku, I’d say it was Juku himself, somehow. A time-travelling Juku from the future, maybe? I don’t know anymore, man, but I’ve read that previous cases of the series come together in Carnival, so here’s hoping it gets explained better than as “a ghost did it maybe”.

For the longest time I kept wondering where the personality dissonance between this Juku and the Detective God in Tsukumojuku came from. Why would this ever gentle, kind and forgiving character be written as some vore murderer monster dude? So, here’s my current Reaching Theory TM. We know the Detective God really is ‘an Angel’ as he claimed, since in the Seventh Story, Tsukumojuku realizes that he himself is actually not ‘the Angel’ but ‘the Beast’ (he thinks about it during that, er... awkward chest pipe moment, if you remember). Now, canon Juku actually is compared to ‘an angel or a god’ in Cosmic, and it’s a good descriptor: he’s kind and forgiving, but has the sorta detached, not-quite-human air; he’s androgynous, unnervingly perfectly beautiful, and one shouldn’t look directly at him for too long. The Detective God, on the other hand, is an Angel in the same way those demons from Jacob’s Ladder are: only when you stop holding onto mortal life (the imaginary world in Beyonds’ case) and accept your death (accept you have to go ‘outside’), you may notice they’re actually angels who have been trying to help you realize the truth. Through brutal means, but still. I guess the Detective God was created by the part of the Beyonds’ subconscious that understands they have to accept the reality, or something. He’s a bit like Silent Hill monsters in this way. Note that the person the Detective God mainly attacks (and possibly talks with him off-screen earlier) is the Original. And the Story it happens in, Fourth (II), is the point after which the Original probably started thinking about the plan involving killing everything they hold dear to make them face reality. It was really Detective God who first made the Original and the Second One aware of ‘God’ -- even if indirectly: getting them to think about ‘God’ by making them refute the claim that Seiryoin is their God, getting them to think about what the presence of ‘the canon Tsukumo Juku’ before them means for their own existence. Or Maijo just likes to write hard vore and i’m thinking too much

#sparkly reads cosmic #long post #maijo and jdc stuff #hcs meta and stuff #uhhh I guess I'll also tag this as #jorge tag #though it doesn't have a lot of jorge #tsukumojuku spoilers #jdc spoilers #and surprisingly #jacob's ladder spoilers

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translations-by-aiimee · 3 years

Text

Dig a Grave to Dig Out a Ghost - Chapter 5

Original Title: 挖坟挖出鬼

Genres: Drama, Horror, Mystery, Supernatural, Yaoi

This translation is based on multiple MTLs and my own limited knowledge of Chinese characters. If I have made any egregious mistakes, please let me know.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Chapter 5 - Expert

The subsequent calm was something Lin Yan wasn't expecting. The thing seemed to have decided it tortured him enough and nothing else happened the rest of the night. Lin Yan changed back into his clothes and unplugged his computer. Even though he knew that that probably wouldn't do anything, the screen actually powered off and didn't come back on at all in the night.

Perhaps a new storm was brewing in the silence, but Lin Yan was too exhausted to worry about it. The alcohol that was left in his system worked as a great tranquillizer, and he rolled over and fell asleep.

While he was deep in sleep, something cold pressed itself on his lips again, but Lin Yan was too much a heavy sleeper to realize it.

When he woke up, the entire room was clean. All the red paint had disappeared, the light gray printed wallpaper and the screen wall painted by the students of the Academy of Fine Arts were intact, and the glass was spotless. There was no other evidence to prove that the absurdity of last night had ever happened except for the shameful traces of liquid on Lin Yan's body and clothes. He took a bath and threw the red clothes into the washbowl. Compared with the power of the invisible thing, he was clearly at a disadvantage. Instead of running around without a plan, it was better to observe what happens as things unravel.

After he finished packing things up, Lin Yan took out his phone and texted Yin Zhou about the meeting place. Unexpectedly, he got a reply almost instantly: See you at the school gate in half an hour.

Lin Yan looked at himself in the mirror. Within just two nights, he looked like he had been doing drugs for years, he had a scruffy stubble growing, and his eyes were red. The mint scent of his shaving foam made Lin Yan feel for the first time that his typically monotonous life was actually so much more beautiful than that. The blade was thin and sharp. Just one long stroke across his neck and there would be nothing left.

Humans were such fragile creatures.

"Shit. . ." Lin Yan hissed, sighing at his unfortunate luck and put his fingers under the water. His hand had slipped and he sliced his fingertip on the blade, red blood seeping out. Lin Yan wrapped a bandaid around his finger, leaning against the wall and pondering about how unlucky it was to feel the pain.

He didn't know what kind of dye was used on the funeral clothes, but it had bled dramatically in the water. After a while, the whole basin of water had been dyed red. Lin Yan glanced at it in disgust as he left and slammed the door shut.

At 8 o'clock, Lin Yan saw Yin Zhou holding a Scallion pancake and some fruit in front of the school gate.

The two of them regretted trying to drive. The roads were clogged with morning rush hour traffic to the point that they couldn't even see the end of the lines of cars. What genius designed this kind of urban roundabout? Five ring roads surrounded the main road and they were forced to convene together every morning and night.

Lin Yan and Yin Zhou were nearing the third ring road and they still didn't have any temper, so all they could do was turn on the radio and eat the breakfast that Yin Zhou brought.

"A 13-year-old boy from a remote village in Sichuan was found hanged at home wearing a red coat. The locals suspected it was most likely cult-related. It is reported that the boy's time of birth and time of death are both extremely negative times and very suitable for. . ."

Lin Yan snapped the radio off.

It seemed that everything in the world had been messed up overnight. Even this kind of unreliable news could be relayed to the public.

Yin Zhou didn't care. He swallowed the last bite of his pancake and hiccuped. He said with satisfaction: "I spent the rest of the night in the library. I was starving and I couldn't buy anything. It's great to feel full."

"There was no exam recently, what were you doing at the library?"

"I was studying the enemy's intelligence. This enemy works in the dark. Can we defeat it if we understand how it operates? What do you think, buddy?"

Lin Yan turned his face to look at the crowded traffic outside the window. He stayed silent for a while before he said softly, "Do you really believe that there are ghosts in this world? I feel like something is wrong with me. Maybe I should see a psychiatrist first."

Yin Zhou's eyes widened in surprise: "Come on, even if something's up with you, I'm totally normal, yet we both saw those clothes yesterday."

". . . At your house the day before yesterday, I was the only one who thought it was cold, and I was the only one who could feel ‘it’ in the house."

Lin Yan sorted out his thoughts and told Yin Zhou his experience of being choked by someone last night.

Lin Yan wasn't expecting it but Yin Zhou exploded after hearing this, and blurted out: "Fuck, that ghost was a rabbit master* during his lifetime?" He scanned Lin Yan's face over and over again: "Little Brother Lin, don't tell me. . . you can be considered a nice-looking guy if you look closely. He's dead and maybe he's lonely and wants to recruit you as his wife."

*because they would kill the rabbit by snapping its neck

"Fuck you. If you aren't going to be serious, get out of my car and leave. Don't forget to burn two boxes of condoms for me when I croak." Lin Yan said quietly. The car behind him honked its horn twice, and Lin Yan realized that while he was talking, a 5-6 metre gap had cleared in front of him. He hurriedly followed the line of traffic.

"Furthermore, in the middle of the night, I obviously saw that the whole house was covered with red paint, but in the morning there was nothing. It was as if I had been dreaming."

Yin Zhou dragged the backpack out of the back seat and hugged it in his arms. He said, "Hey, let me show you the results of my brother's research." As he talked, he opened his bag and took out a dozen crumpled papers from it and spread them out on his knees. He flattened them with his hands and started going over them from top to bottom.

"You can't take care of shit. I feel uncomfortable just looking at those."

"See, the attributes of a wife. This ghost saw it perfectly."

A grass mud horse roared and ran across Lin Yan's heart.

Sure enough, these geeks are something else.

"Listen carefully." Yin Zhou pushed up his glasses with his long fingers: "There are generally two modern interpretations of ghosts. The first is due to the discovery of dark matter. You know the law of conservation of energy?"

". . . Go on." Lin Yan gave him a blank look.

"The universe expands at a certain rate every year. If the law of conservation of energy goes as normal, where does the energy that supports the expansion of the universe come from? According to this question, modern physics puts forward the concept of dark matter and dark energy. It does not generate electromagnetic waves, cannot be sensed, and cannot be measured. The law of gravity estimates that dark matter and energy account for 96% of the mass of the universe, and the remaining 4% is what humans can now recognize."

"Many unexplainable phenomena are therefore attributed to the results of dark matter, such as meridians in traditional Chinese medicine, the power of the mind, and ghosts. There are many discussions on this field abroad, but it is obviously blocked in China and difficult to find." Yin Zhou spread out his hands.

Lin Yan nodded. This was a bit like a science fiction novel he had read once.

"And the second one?"

"The second type is attributed to electromagnetic waves. The environment in which the deceased died is not conducive to electromagnetic wave attenuation. The powerful thoughts it had before death form a unique energy field. If a person's own frequency is similar to it, it will resonate when they come into contact. The waveform of the original ghost is greatly strengthened so then the two can sense each other."

Lin Yan was stunned: "You mean I. . . resonate with the ghost?"

Yin Zhou said indifferently that it was possible. He turned and smiled mysteriously: "Do you know how to explain love at first sight using electromagnetic fields?"

Lin Yan's heart stuttered.

"It's just resonating. It's the same with both men and women."

Yin Zhou sighed: "I don't want to fall in love for a while. It's boring, it's like a ghost."

The cars finally started moving again, and they finally got off the third road ring after being stuck for three hours. Lin Yan turned on the navigation and stepped on the accelerator to hurry towards the destination.

He always thinks that love was just like a ghost; he didn't believe in either. He only understood the panic and anxiety he felt when he encountered it, but he has never imagined that ghosts were also like love, triggered by a specific reason in a specific environment and dragged forcibly into the abyss, unable to escape.

"Have you been in touch with anything special recently, or have you been to anywhere special?"

Lin Yan thought about it for a moment and shook his head: "No. Every day I'm in the study room, tutor's office, library, home, cafeteria, there's nowhere else. But I have come into a lot of contact with lots of things from several dynasties."

Yin Zhou clumped the pile of information in his hand, and put it into back his backpack despite Lin Yan's contemptuous eyes, and clicked the buckle shut.

"Impossible. The electromagnetic waves would have decayed early in a small object, even if the Maoshan technique was used."

A thought suddenly flashed through Lin Yan's mind.

"There was this one place. . .Last month, my old man arranged an internship position for me on an archaeological team. It was a tomb with small specifications. I was there for less than a week."

Yin Zhou's eyes lit up all of a sudden: "There's this show, we should wait and check it. . . what the fuck!"

Lin Yan slammed on the brakes. Yin Zhou's head slammed into the windshield with a bang, and he wailed in pain.

"What are you doing?! Braking like that is going to kill you. What if we got rear-ended?!"

Lin Yan looked at the empty windshield in shock. He pulled the car over and, when he turned to Yin Zhou, his face changed.

"You. . . didn't see that just now?"

"What!" Yin Zhou took off the glasses that had been knocked off-kilter, trying to push them into their original spot, and couldn't help complaining in grief.

"There was a hand. . . stretching down from the roof of the car."

Yin Zhou was stunned and looked up at the window glass cautiously. A truck came up from behind, went around their car and drove on.

Lin Yan was too scared to speak for a while. He recalled the stiff white hand that had slapped on the windshield from the roof of the car just now, but it disappeared in a blink of an eye. There were speeding trucks or tankers everywhere on the sixth ring road. He opened his mouth and looked at Yin Zhou. The other party understood his thoughts immediately. Yin Zhou took a breath and hesitated: "Then this thing. . . it wants a human life."

Lin Yan shook his head. He always felt that there was some motive behind everything that had happened, but he couldn't say it out loud.

They drove out of the city in a blink of an eye. The endless rows of poplar trees and the green border fields in the suburbs relaxed the tension of the two people in the car a lot. Lin Yan rolled down the car window, and the car air mixed with the fragrance of flowers and plants that poured in. Inside the car, the stuffy scent of the pancakes was blown away.

After the twist and turns the GPS took them on, the car turned onto a rugged path paved with stones. The surrounding buildings were replaced with independent bungalows and small farmyards. A yellow dog squatted on the steps and stretched its neck. Some hens gathered in groups lazily together. Every now and again, they passed by a white goose on the side of the road. Lin Yan slowed down and stared at the map displayed on the GPS. He glanced at Yin Zhou distrustfully.

"If I keep going, I'll have to turn around to go back to the village. Did your mother send us to a reclusive expert?"

Yin Zhou leaned over to study the map, then turned his head in confusion and looked out the window. He happened to pass by a house, a yellow mud bungalow, with a faded couplet on the door. The old man in front of it only lost two front teeth, and he was leaning back to watch the excitement. . Yin Zhou scratched his scalp suspiciously: "The address my mother gave is at the end of the village, and she said it was amazing. Let me buy some tributes to bring with me. I can't do it alone."

So Lin Yan stopped the car when passing by the market, and bought two gifts according to Yin Zhou's suggestion. . . that bastard.

"Are you sure about all this?" Lin Yan looked embarrassedly left and right, carrying a live turtle in one hand and walking back, Yin Zhou happily pointed at the turtle's head and said, "What do you know? , These kinds of psychic masters rely on this stuff to keep up with their lifestyle. Trust me."

Lin Yan threw the two bastards into the trunk, took out a bottle of mineral water and handed it to Yin Zhou. He also opened a bottle for himself and took a few sips.

The country cicadas cried one after another, and the green wheat was headed; it was a wonderful scene of peace and prosperity.

Several children wearing red and green were squatting on the ground playing fan cards not far away. Lin Yan asked Yin Zhou: "What did your mother saw that name of the expert was? I'll ask around."

He couldn't help but imagine a scene of a bamboo hut with a mantle drooping in front of the porch. An old man in white with his hand stroked his beard and smiled slightly. He and Yin Zhou knelt forward on one knee, clasping their fists and begging, "Master, please guide me!"

Yin Zhou took a note from his pocket. He squinted at it, and said perplexedly: "Second Immortal Gu."

Before Lin Yan had enough time to swallow, all the water was spat back out.

"Ahem. . . is that so?"

In a small courtyard in the northeast corner of the village, Lin Yan and Yin Zhou found the legendary Second Immortal Gu’s house. When Lin Yan saw Second Immortal Gu's respectable face from outside the door, the regret in his heart was like torrential rapids. There was an enclave in an empty black room; he didn't know which god was being worshipped. An old woman in blue flower cloth sat cross-legged on the futon with her eyes closed and rests her mind. The red cloth strip that was tied to her forehead was quite imposing.

"This posture rivals some of the best dancers out there!" Yin Zhou pointed at the scene inside and couldn't help muttering softly.

"Come on, this is who your mother mentioned. Be respectful." Lin Yan said embarrassedly.

"What should we do?"

"Let's take a look first. Maybe the real person hasn't shown up."

Lin Yan and Yin Zhou walked through the door. Hearing the movement, the immortal woman lifted her eyelids slightly, and hummed from her nose aimlessly.

"Oh, ahem. . ." Yin Zhou couldn't hold back his grin and quickly concealed it with a cough.

What happened later was a farce. After receiving the turtle and two hundred yuan brought by Lin Yan, the woman suddenly became energetic. She worshipped the gods with incense and poured a bowl of clear water on Lin Yan while muttering words. After turning around Lin Yan more than ten times, she finally opened his eyes sharply. Lin Yan was so frightened by her that his body was shocked. The only thing she did was shout: "Aha! I saw it!"

"There is a little girl standing behind you!"

Lin Yan and Yin Zhou looked at each other, each holding their breaths.

"Oh, this baby girl died terribly. She said that she was locked up and could not be born. She didn't have money to buy clothes, and she didn't have money to pay her way through death. That's why she's gotten involved with you. . ."

"Wait, I'll ask her how to resolve this. . ."

The immortal woman closed her eyes and began to sing. Lin Yan pointed at the door to Yin Zhou and said: "Do you need someone to grease your feet, what are you waiting for?"

After reciting a long list of words, she opened her eyes and saw that there were no longer two other people in the room.

The immortal woman had no choice but to touch the newly collected two hundred yuan and shook her head, muttering that the young people nowadays are really impatient. Then she staggered around to pack her things up.

When she picked up the bastard turtle, she couldn't help but give a long sigh.

#dig a grave to dig out a ghost #dig a grave to dig out a ghost translation #chinese bl #chinese novel #english translation #yaoi novel

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