#where alec asks why he let him sleep there

[pansexual-puppy-pack]

day 2 of @theoraekenapperciation 's theo raeken appreciation week: on accident

Theo's not entirely sure how, but Brett, Lori, and Alec end up following him around.

He'd enrolled back in Beacon Hills High School as a senior, and after everything that happened, Brett and Lori decided to transfer in from Devenford Preperatory School, and Derek strongarmed Alec into enrolling, too.

This meant that he and Brett were in the same year, taking a lot of the same classes, and that Alec and Lori were in their sophomore year—which, in turn, meant that they all (for some fucking reason) started attaching themselves to Theo's hip.

Theo tried telling Liam about this over a free period they both had, but Liam just laughed and asked him why he was complaining about getting new friends. Theo had sighed, and no more than ten seconds later, Brett had decided to seat himself on Theo's other side.

"See?" Theo asked Liam, gesturing to Brett's—well, everything, really.

Liam shrugged. "Can't be that bad."

Theo leaned over the table. "I literally see them 24/7. We live in the same loft. We go to the same school. Alec even hides in my backseat sometimes so he can catch a ride with me."

("What're we talking about?" Brett asked, pulling out a textbook and his laptop. Theo turned to him and said, "Don't act like you didn't listen in on the way here." Brett gave him a shit-eating grin.)

Liam rolled his eyes. "I think they just like you, Theo."

Theo groaned, a little over-dramatically.

At the end of the school day, Theo "accidentally" forgets to let the three know that he's heading home. (He just got in his truck and left—he needed some time alone.)

...But it's not like that's ever stopped them before.

He barely gets to Corey's neighborhood before he spots it—Brett's signature black car, running a red light, with Lori and Alec sticking their heads and bodies out the windows.

Theo curses and makes a u-turn—louder than expected, tires squealing as he goes—and speeds off. He almost misses the shouts of Alec and Lori as Brett's car does the same and starts to chase him.

Fuck him, it's not like it's exactly _easy_ to hide a big, black pickup truck. He doesn't know this area of Beacon Hills as well as the rest of it and kinda banked on Brett not knowing it either—but he guessed that he was being tracked on the Pack-mandatory Find My Friends. (He should've turned it off. Fuck.)

"Get your ass back here!" Theo heard Brett yell, his engine roaring as he started catching up.

Shit.

Theo clicks his tongue and makes a sharp left, rolling quickly back on one of the main roads of Beacon Hills and basically racing Brett through the streets and—giving up halfway through the drive—back to the Hale loft...

...And instead somehow ends up at the Hale Auto Shop. (On accident, he swears. It's like his body just decided to get to a different place.)

He loses the three on the way there, too; how, he has absolutely no idea, but he's grateful for it. He lets himself into the auto shop, waving at Derek, and letting his feet lead him to the too-cozy couch in Derek's office. (Derek'll understand. He's not exactly a bursting social butterfly, either.)

Theo falls face-first onto it and drifts right off to sleep, quiet for the first time in a month.

...For like, ten minutes, maybe, because it isn't long before Theo feels the couch dip with new weight then two bodies pile on top of his.

He groans. "Is an hour of sleep too much to ask?"

Brett's laugh comes from Derek's desk. Opening his eyes, Theo sees him pulling out his notebook and laptop—looks like it's gonna be a long night. Especially since Lori and Alec's combined weight are threatening to take all of Theo's air, and he's about 70% sure that another minute like this would end up with at least one of them suffocating.

Lori hums and rests her chin on the top of his head. "You didn't tell us where you were going. We got worried,"

"I can take care of myself," Theo gruffs, reaching a hand up to bat away at her.

"Yeah—" Alec says, batting back in her defense. "—But it's more fun when you're with other people, right?"

Theo sighs and decides to roll over, effectively sending both Alec and Lori toppling to the floor.

The sound they make draws Derek's footsteps towards the room. "Could you guys not fuck up my office?"

"Derek!" Alec calls from the floor. "Help, Theo assaulted us!"

Derek opens the door, and his gaze is immediately drawn to Alec and Lori on the floor, then up to Theo lying peacefully on the couch. He rolls his eyes. "Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Hi, Theo."

Theo waves again. "Hey,"

Derek checks out the room, seems to decide that it's in an okay state, and walks back out. "Dinner at seven! Be there!"

A chorus of yeah's echoes through his office as the door softly shuts behind him.

Theo promptly falls back asleep.

[alexanderlightweight]

Hello! For Writing Wednesday could we please have some more Spoils of War or Created for Death? I’m obsessed with both of these to an insane degree:

What I love about SoW: tentative!Alec whom Magnus has to work at gaining trust from? I love it. There’s a line in one part about Magnus having to fix how the Clave broke Alec before Magnus can gentle him and I just—gorgeous, perfect, headcannon accepted. Veiled consorts? Hooooooly that’s so cool omg I swear I heard a symphony in my head when I realized where you were going. The mask? Alec’s hesitance and obedience, thinking everything is out to hurt him but doing it anyway because what choice does he have, is so beautiful, and Magnus mourning a little that he didn’t have more time to make the experience better for Alec but not willing to risk the delay and risk Alec growing even more distant is just 😍—lmao I could write an essay about how much I love this universe.

CoD: I fucking love eldritch angel nephilim and this is giving EVERYTHING. Nephilim who are cobbled together projects of the angels, their biology so skewed by angelic power that even the nephilim don’t know what their children will look like/heal like/die like. Mostly the difference being subtle, but sometimes Not. Raised to hate and fear their full potential, anything that is Too Angelic, and Alec a living hearsay/blasphemy even when his blood was only 30/70 because if it. AND THEN. It’s not losing Jace that tips Alec over, it’s Magnus dying—demon-born prince/king of edom enemy of the Clave. So gorgeous, holllyyyy. I can’t even think too much about Magnus collaring 6-winged Alec, about Alec kneeling for him, about the terrible kindness and protection in Izzy disowning her brother, about the gentleness of Magnus hiding Alec away and covering his eyes and hushing him because even the ANGELS wouldn’t know what to do in this situation, with this new body, and then Team Immortal coming in and IMMORTALITY and wow

Anyway yeah sorry for spitting up my lovestruck brain in your asks but I had to make sure that you knew you’ve struck me deeply with your writing and that’s why I’m begging on your doorsteps for literally any content in either one of these verses 💜

i'm very glad both stories are being enjoyed so much and please don't apologize i love stuff like this! it's a huge compliment but also it's just really nice to see that other people are as into and obsessed with my verses as i am. because sometimes i wait for my sleep meds to kick in and i just plot where i'm going and end up passing out in the middle of a mental scene being written lol

so i wrote a thing for spoils of war and thank you! i'm glad it was enjoyed because i have this big headcanon about how consorts are really magically important to warlocks and magical kings if dominion magic is in the fic and a big thing about that is protecting the consorts identity. via masks but also cloaking the consort in so much magic that you can't even tell anything abut them besides what the warlock allows you to know. and there is a lot of history thats hinted at

-

for created for death

izzy was fucked up about that, okay. but she had to relinquish alec as a brother because otherwise the clave still had ties to him. since they don't need them anymore, the clave sort of doesn't let true nephilim have any rights. so alec had to be disowned as a nephilim and then magnus was basically like 'okay but my magic is on him so hes mine since i calmed him down' and izzy was like 'he totally counts as a weapon. yours now. because thats the safest thing for alec atm

so alec is actually 70/30 and most nephilm are 30/70 in a angelic/mundane equation. which is why he was being kept watch over by the clave but uh, the fear of magnus dying kinda made him lose it

i hope you enjoy this!

<3 lumine

spoils of war

—

Alec doesn’t know what’s going on.

Magnus didn’t bother explaining what the ritual was or what it did beyond that it was yet another bonding ceremony. But even their political wedding that signified the end of a war didn’t feel this elaborate.

Alec knows it doesn’t really matter, that he’ll be taking part in the ritual whether he knows what it does or not. In fact, it's almost better not to know than to know what he might need to do.

Alec can’t say no to whatever is going to happen and he knows that, so he takes comfort in the fact that he can still see. The mask has magic in and through it and Alec tries not to consider where it’s from and why he can feel nephil magic still fading from it.

Instead, he concentrates on Magnus and his magic and puts out the thoughts and details of his surroundings, like being watched by over a thousand warlocks and their companions, all hidden with their faces hidden behind a variety of masks.

It’s daunting to be here, to be taking part in something that feels so old and sacred when Alec was supposed to be no more than chattel. Fodder for a war built on the blood of innocents that Alec’s own people started.  It feels wrong to be here so defenseless and yet know that Magnus’ magic will protect him better than any weapon.

—

Carefully, Magnus uses magic to take off Alexander’s ceremonial collar and he instead replaces it with a loop of pure magic that will slowly take on more and more power until the image of it will always become whatever Magnus wishes it to be.

For now, however, it is a tight loop of deep purple magic that pulses with Magnus’ magic and power in time to Alexander's every breath.

It’s a show of power to summon a single adamas arrow — one that Alexander gave to Magnus by his own hand — and hold it without harm. Alexander sucks in a startled breath — perhaps at the sight of one of his own arrows or that Magnus can hold it with ease — and Magnus can feel him quiver under Magnus’ palm.

“My protection is absolute. When you bleed it will be because I wish it, for no other is allowed to spill your blood.” Magnus uses the arrowhead to nick Alexander’s upper lip — just as he cut the lower with the stele — and then he leans forward to lick it off and suckle the cut until he earns a whine of pain.

“The flames of Edom will devour all before allowing anyone to touch you without my permission.” Magnus promises and his fingers dance with flames that brush harmlessly over Alexander’s neck — the shard of Magnus’ soul claiming Alexander in an undeniable way that will protect him from harm in Edom.

Alexander seems torn between leaning forward and stepping away and Magnus knows his boy better now than he did when they were wed. Alexander needs no leash as Magnus first thought, just a steady hand and Magnus’ voice.

The bonds between them are the only tether Magnus will ever need with Alexander.

“Sweetheart—” Magnus teases, his voice caressing Alexander with magic and he can see how his boy shudders at the sound and feel of it. He steps forward unconsciously, he's been instinctively drawn to Magnus from the very beginning and Magnus croons and reaches out. His palm blooms with hellfire before settling on Alexander’s hip and Magnus pulls him closer still.

“Should any look at you without being graced by my benevolence, their sight shall be consumed by my magic. A payment for stealing a glimpse of what is only mine to see.”

Magnus’ vows are instinctive and there is a primal surge of delight as he takes the ritual a step further, cursing any being who would dare look at Alexander’s uncovered face without his blessing.

It’s an old tradition.

Older still than the ritual Magnus is using and it’s something that has been out of style for over three centuries. Magnus still remembers the stories of how the legend of Medusa started. A warlock desperate to protect her gorgeous consort cursed her love with a vicious, loving protection.

Magnus knows now that Alexander expects to be a spectacle.

A disgraced nephilim in the eyes of his own people, traded away for a peace bought with his soul and virginity. Alexander expected to be paraded around as a mockery, a whipping boy for the clave to offer to the warlocks and it’s clear that’s what the clave told him he was.

But Alexander is not something to be gawked at.

He is not someone who Magnus will allow others to see, not to admire and certainly not to laugh over. Alexander is his consort and if that means that Magnus veils him in magic and curses all those who dare look upon him, then so be it.

[onetimetwotimesthreetimess]

“Baby?”

Magnus raises his head and finds his husband with a soft expression on his face.

“Hey.”

Alec crosses the distance and sits infront of him cross legged on the bed.

“How are you holding up?”

“Fine. You?”

“Okay-ish.” 

Magnus leans closer and kisses his forehead softly, mindful of the bundle between the two of them.

“And, how is my other baby doing?” Alec asks in the gentlest of voices and looks down at his lap, where their daughter sleeps peacefully. 

“She’s strong.” Magnus states and strokes her cheeks. 

Alec bends down to kiss her forehead. “The boys are waiting for you, outside.”

Magnus sighs. “I don’t get it.”

“Magnus, they are kids.”

“They are her brothers, Alexander. Why don’t they like her?” Magnus asks sadly.

Alec grabs his face in his hands and places a soft kiss on his lips. “Baby, it’s not like that.”

“Max wasn’t like this when we got Rafe.” 

“Rafael was older than Max so he didn’t mind much. He had someone to play with. But Max doesn’t know what to do with Ari, she’s a baby.” 

Magnus shifts Arianna closer to his chest, remembering how badly things could have ended today. “And what’s Rafael’s excuse?”

Alec hesitates. “I think he’s scared.”

“We’re not replacing them.” Magnus sighs sadly. He loves Rafael and Max with everything but the two have made things harder for them the past few weeks. 

“They don’t know that. We do spend most of our time with her these days.”

Magnus hates that what Alec just said was true. “You know why that is.” 

Alec pushes himself up from the bed and opens the door so that the boys can enter. The two look so sad and guilty that his heart cracks. Alec bends down and kisses their heads.

He has been mad at the two of them too. But then he saw how pissed Magnus was and had realised that the boys could do with at least one parent on their side. 

“Hi.”

“Is bapak mad?” Rafaela’s voice comes through.

Alec nods his head and the boys deflate. “We are sorry, daddy.” Max bites his lips.

“Come inside.”

The two pad towards the bed with slow movements.

Magnus loves them too much to be mad at them so he pats on the space next to him and the two of them jump, but carefully. 

“Is Ari okay?”

Alec runs a finger through Max’s head and nods. “She is now. But it could have ended badly.”

“We’re sorry. We didn’t mean to hurt her.” The boys apologise and a few tears slips from their eyes.

“You need to apologise to her.” Magnus says to them, without any heat. They have felt enough guilty. 

Max and Rafael leans closer towards Ari. Rafael lets out a careful hand and strokes her cheek. he looks scared. “You wont hurt her, Rafael.”

Max has no such inhibitions and he kisses her forehead then gives Magnus a beaming smile. 

“We are sorry, Ari.” 

The second they do that, Arianna wakes up from her sleep and grabs their hands. Or fingers. Since she is so small.

Fuck. She is so small. Magnus can’t believe it sometimes.

A wide smile appears on Alec’s face and Magnus himself feels his heart full.

“What happened today can never happen again, okay?” Alec says.

The boys nod. 

“Are you going to tell us why you are so bothered by us?”

Max pouts. “You are always with her.”

“You missed nailpaint night twice now.” Rafael says, his voice barely audible.

Magnus looks at Alec and his husband takes Arianna in his arms without any saying anything.

He holds the boys closer to him and kisses their forehead. “I’m sorry. We are sorry for neglecting you two.”

Alec gives him a look and Magnus sighs because he knows what Alec wants.

“Arianna is a little sick, right now. It might take her some time to get better.” Magnus can hear the pain through his husband’s voice.

Rafael and Max looks alarmed. “What’s wrong?”

Magnus takes a deep breath. “It’s her heart. It’s a little weak.”

The two frown at it since they don’t really know what it means.

“But she’ll be okay?”

He gives them a smile. “She will be.”

Rafael holds her hand carefully while Max yells. “I will protect Ari.”

-a little glimpse into the life of Lightwood-Banes sone fifteen years before Magnus’s murder/death(?).

[headstrongblake]

@thewholecrew : why are you helping me? / alec & o

when alec had been roughly returned to his cell, thrown away like trash, octavia was waiting patiently by the little crack in their shared wall. “you’re back alec, it’s okay, you’re okay now,” she tried to encourage, dirty finger trailing along the crack— wishing she could comfort him somehow, wishing she’d found her cure well before this hellish place. but as she offered him soothing words, a guard banged on the outside of her cell, warning her to leave him be or she’d be taken next. dark tired hues glared back at the guard, only getting up from the floor to sit on the bed to placate the guard into leaving. silently, she waited. listened for the sound of the guards taking another prisoner much further down from them that they never saw.

after all went quiet once more, octavia shifted off her bed, uncaring of the cameras in the corner recording her as she went to sit by alec again. “think of something that makes you feel warm and safe alec, it’s not a cure but it helps.” octavia quietly encouraged once more. but as alec asked, “why are you helping me?” octavia’s words escaped her. hues stared forward at the other wall of her cell, pondering where this deep desire to help alec comes from. it’d be easier for her if she didn’t. there would be less times when she’s tormented a little extra because the guards have caught onto her protectiveness of him. perhaps despite how treacherous this place is…she could make it easier on herself.

octavia let out a deep sigh, tilting her head against the wall as her palm rested on the floor near the crack still. “because professor x would, he’s the headmaster at the school i lived at.” she answered truthfully. the professor had taught her a type of kindness octavia had never thought was possible. one she hadn’t experienced beyond her big brother who loved her more than life. despite all the wreckage she created, all the trials her powers went through as they developed and grew, the professor had never once made her feel anything but that she belonged. as octavia tucked her knees against her chest, an ache gnawed in her heart. she never should have left there. never should have encouraged trinity to leave with her because now— where was trinity? what’s happened to her since octavia’s been locked away? “why did you live there and not with your brother?” alec asked and her heart suddenly ached for a whole new reason. alec’s inquiry makes sense, she’s shared stories of her courageous big brother and called out his name in her sleep.

“the scientists and doctors here are studying my…abilities but they’re also studying my biology. see, i was born with my curse, this monster inside me and when my mom and brother realized…i had to hide away. i never went to school… never left the house. well, aside from when bellamy could sneak me out to a park or something. it was about protecting me, you know, keeping me safe but, it also protected everyone from me.” octavia explained as her thoughts lingered on her brother, on his face she could so clearly see in her mind as he helped her experience just a sliver of childhood by bringing her to parks at night. tears stung in her eyes, but to force it away, octavia lifted her palms to her knees rubbing them along the fabric of her bottoms. “as i was getting older, my abilities were getting stronger…more unstable. and well, monsters don’t usually get to live you know…so my mom tried to kill the monster in me and… instead, the monster killed her.” her jaw clenched at the memory, barely fifteen as tears streamed down her cheeks, huddled in her bed as bellamy inspected what she knew to be true. she had murdered her mother. “that’s why the school, that’s why professor xavier. i think my brother figured i’d be safer…” if only she’d listened.

[mydisenchantedeulogy]

Could we get Vaas sending Liv out of the camp because of Hoyt coming down. She goes out to see the doc and gets some pictures of him and his home. Cue Vaas getting jealous of her pictures of Doc!

A/n: thank you, hun, for sending me this. I had fun writing it. I hope you enjoy it.

Warning(s): Vaas being Vaas (albeit a bit tame), mentions of drugs, language, jealousy.

No Minors Allowed!!

"Hoyt is coming here? Why?" Liv asked, raising a curious brow. 

She tried not to let it show, but she was terrified. Since meeting him, she never wanted to be put in a situation where she'd have to see him again, but of course, things didn't always work out the way she wanted them to - her new life on the Rook Islands was an example of this. 

Carlos sighed. He understood her worry, he didn't much like Hoyt or his Privateers, but her questions were unnecessary. 

"It doesn't fucking matter. We're not going to be here."

Liv was more confused than ever, but as if the pirate knew what she was about to ask, he quickly answered.

"El Jefe (the boss) is sending us on a run to the doctor's house."

This must be a drug run.

The only time Vaas sent someone to Doctor Earnhardt's place was to buy drugs from him, though Liv never went to see him for that reason. She wondered if Vaas was sending her there because of Hoyt's sudden visit. Her stomach was in knots. She wasn't sure how to feel about this. 

"Can I grab my camera before we go?"

"Hurry the fuck up," Carlos retorted in annoyance. 

He honestly didn't mind. As long as she stayed out of his business, then he was content. Giving her back her camera was probably the best idea Vaas had when it came to Liv. At least she wasn't annoying Carlos. 

With her Olympus in tow, she got into the Scavenger and tinkered with the settings as Carlos drove her to the doctor's house. Liv was beyond excited; the land around the mansion was gorgeous. 

She spent hours running around the grounds within sight of Carlos, taking pictures. Doctor Earnhardt was a bit strange, but always so kind to her, sometimes mistaking her name as Agnes, which she didn't mind. It almost saddened her to say goodbye to him and return to the outpost. 

Liv was on cloud 9 as she sat beside Yada at an unoccupied table beneath one of the huts. It was almost time to eat thankfully, so she waited with him as Carlos went to check in with Vaas. 

"Why are you so damn happy?" Yada asked. 

Was she not allowed to be? 

"Good day," Liv uttered. 

"Lucky fucking you. We had to deal with Hoyt and his stuck-up putas (bitches)," Yada mentioned. 

Liv would have felt bad for them, only the Pirates could handle it. She wondered if Vaas was in a terrible mood; she wanted to view her pictures on the laptop. It was probably best if she waited.

After dinner, she sauntered to the trailer that Vaas stayed in and knocked on the door, knowing better than to just walk in. 

"Fuck off!" He shouted in response. 

Liv tightened her jaw. She reckoned that he was in a bad mood. With an uneasy breath, she clutched her camera right. 

"Thank you!"

She turned to walk away, but the sound of the door slamming open startled her, drawing her attention to the pirate. Her first response was to avert her eyes, due to his half-naked appearance; his shirt was missing, and his pants were nearly hanging off his hips. The dark circles beneath his eyes were more prominent, making her assume that he had been trying to sleep. 

Liv felt her face heat up. 

"The fuck are you thanking me for?" Vaas asked in confusion. 

"For allowing me to go with Carlos to see Alec," Liv answered quietly. She lifted her camera. "I took some pictures. Um… I left you a note before I borrowed it from your room." 

Vaas ordered her inside, despite the look of annoyance on his face. He considered turning her away since he wasn't in the mood, but the content and embarrassed look on her face wasn't one he was used to seeing. She mostly tried to hide her fear, remaining quiet in his presence unless spoken to. 

As she walked in, Vaas shut the door behind her and grabbed the laptop, tossing it on the bed before he lay down. He watched Liv grab the cable, sitting down on the edge beside him where he could see the scene. 

One by one, once booted, the images appeared on the screen. Liv was in awe of them, even the ones of Doctor Earnhardt that she took. A specific one of him sitting at his chair by the window made her smile. He looked comfortable, maybe even a little high. 

"You like him?" Vaas suddenly asked. 

Liv raised a brow.

"Alec? He's sweet… Though sometimes he's a bit unorthodox. But I like him enough."

"Enough to fuck him?" Vaas asked. 

Where was this coming from? Liv wasn't sure what to say. She peered over at him, seeing his eyes narrowed on the screen. There was no way he could have been jealous of the doctor. Vaas might be bipolar but she had never seen him show signs of jealousy toward Alec before. 

Is it because of me?

Liv sighed. How was she meant to defuse this? Turning her eyes back to the laptop, she searched for an image and then turned it into a background image, lying down beside him; the laptop rested on her stomach.

"This is by far my favorite picture on the island."

It was a picture of Vaas sitting on the beach with the sun on his back, making him appear almost like an angel. 

Or a demon. 

"The lighting is flawless," Liv uttered as she hovered her fingers over the screen, showing him the way it cascaded over him. "And so are you. Guapo (handsome), no?"

"¡Mierda (shit)! You know how to play the game," Vaas stated with a grin. "Always kissing my ass."

He put his fingers to his lips to emphasize his point. 

Liv snorted in response. 

She wasn't lying. Vaas was the most handsome demon she had ever seen.

Here's to hoping he doesn't attack Alec for this. 

[x-ceirios-x]

City of Ashes, Chapter 12: The Hostility of Dreams

please see the masterlist for notes about this series/collection of works

-

It turned out Magnus and Jace weren’t leaving after all; Magnus wanted to spend a few more hours at the house to make sure that Maia and Luke were recovering as expected. After a few minutes of awkward conversation with a bored Magnus while Jace, sitting on Luke’s piano bench and industriously studying some sheet music, ignored her, Clary decided to go to bed early. 

But sleep didn’t come. She could hear Jace’s soft piano playing through the walls, but that wasn’t what was keeping her awake. She was thinking of simon, leaving for a house that no longer felt like home to him, of the despair in jace’s voice as he said I want to hate you, and of magnus, not telling jace the truth: that Alec did not want jace to know about his relationship because he was still in love with him. She thought of the satisfaction it would have brought magnus to say the words out loud, to acknowledge what the truth was, and the fact that he hadn’t said them—had let Alec go on lying and pretending—because that was what Alec wanted, and magnus cared about alec enough to give them that. Maybe it was true what the Seelie queen had said, after all: Love made you a liar. 

There was a soft knock on her door—for a split second, Clary wished it was Simon, come back to let her apologize for everything and spend the night with her. She wasn’t even interested in any of the boyfriend-girlfriend stuff, she just wanted to relax with her best friend. Because that’s what he was first. They were always friends first. Another part of her wished it was Jace, though she banished those thoughts immediately. She could still hear his piano-playing, anyway. It wasn’t him. 

“Come in,” she said with a sigh, sitting up a bit in bed. To her surprise, Rowan stood at the door, awkwardly looking at their feet. “Need something?” she asked, misdirected frustration in her voice. 

They looked at her for a second, eyebrows raised, before shaking their head. “Heard some fighting. Wanted to see if you were alright.”

She looked at them strangely—why would Rowan, of all people, care about that? Maybe they were just nosy? She didn’t take them as the type to get needlessly involved in drama, though. They were more like Alec in that sense, but then again, they also seemed like the type to not get wrapped up in their own world. Alec seemed to be particularly focused on his own problems lately—not that she blamed him. 

“Fine,” she said with a sigh. They stared for a moment, then nodded, and were about to leave when she spoke up again. “Actually, no, I’m not fine. Can you…” She trailed off, actually not sure what she wanted from them. 

They closed the door instead of walking past it, then joined her on the bed. They sat against the wall, legs curled up to their chest. Like this, they looked kinda…small. No where near what she looked like, she was sure, but she’d never thought of Rowan as small. Despite their quiet and reserved nature, they had a strong presence. Not one she could describe, though—not that she knew them all that well yet, anyway. 

Clary ran her hand through her hair. “I don’t know what to do. Nothing I say around Jace is right, nothing I say to Simon is enough to make him feel better, now Luke’s hurt—”

“And your world is falling to pieces in front of you, right?” they said, a wry chuckle escaping their lips. “I don't mean to make fun of you. I mean…I get it. That was my life until pretty recently. Actually, it still kinda is. Your issues took precedence, though.”

She frowned. Her issues weren’t exactly her fault. They must have noticed her reaction, because they added, “not like I’m complaining. I’d rather deal with mass-murders and the death of the shadow world as we know it than my personal issues.”

That made her laugh. Despite all of it, Rowan managed to make her laugh, even if it was a little squeak of shock at their words. “What personal issues does a Shadowhunter have to deal with?” she asked, half teasing. “You guys look so…perfect. It’s annoying.”

This time, Rowan laughed. “Trust me, the only person anywhere near perfect out of all of us is Jace, and it’s infuriating. Even he’s got his problems, though.”

She nodded as they spoke, letting the room fall into a comfortable quiet. She didn’t think she’d be so comfortable alone with Rowan—they always seemed so off-putting that she didn’t know what to say to them. However, out of badass-shadowhunter-mode, she found that they were rather relaxed. Or, at least, so they appeared. She could see behind their eyes there were several trains of thought all competing for priority; she wondered what all they were thinking about. 

Her eyes drifted to their hands, resting on their knees, spinning a ring on their middle finger. It was gold and had tiny diamonds through the two twisting lines. It was dainty and pretty–in short, it looked like the complete opposite of what she thought they’d wear. They seemed like they’d be a silver person, maybe black jewelry, too. “What’s that?” she asked curiously, taking their own advice, whether they meant it like that or not. Deal with someone else’s problems instead of her own for a while. 

They looked up and slid the ring off of their finger, holding it out for her to take. She did, and upon inspection, noticed a small engraving inside. SEPT • 3 • 1989. A date of some kind. “My mother’s engagement ring,” they said, watching her look at the ring. She handed it back and they slid it on their hand. “Dad let me have it. I don’t have much from her, including remembering things, but it’s nice to keep around.”

Clary nodded. She knew full well what not knowing things about your parents felt like. Before she found out about the shadow world, she was under the impression that her father died before she was born and she had very few things to hold onto him. Now, she knew better, but that feeling that stayed there for fifteen years still mattered to her. “What’s the date?” she asked. 

“Their anniversary, I think. I was a great late anniversary present,” they said sarcastically. 

She could tell they were in a tough situation—she remembered Jensen telling her their dad was in Idris, and she gathered their mom wasn’t around anymore. Knowing the shadow world the way it was, she assumed she was dead. It probably wasn’t a good idea to ask. 

“Is your birthday soon?” she asked, thinking about the phrase. September 3rd just passed, and if they were a bit later, it had to be soon. It was already mid September. 

They nodded. “You could say that,” they muttered, twisting the ring on their finger. “It’s actually today.”

They laughed awkwardly, but she couldn’t believe her ears. Despite the small family she’d concocted, birthdays were always important to her growing up. Her sixteenth birthday was supposed to be full of an all-expense-paid (by Luke) arcade trip for her and Simon before everything happened. The fact they hadn’t mentioned their birthday beforehand was simply wrong. She would have done something—did Isabelle and Alec do anything? Jace? Maybe even the boys back at the Institute? 

“I can hear you thinking,” they said, shaking their head with a small smile. Apparently, they saw her wide eyes. “It’s not a big deal. I don’t celebrate.”

She frowned at that. “How do you not celebrate your birthday? Simon started planning his birthday back in April. He’s next month, by the way.”

They scoffed. “That’s ridiculous.”

Clary sat up a little, crawling a little closer to them on the bed. “What’s ridiculous is you not celebrating your birthday. When Luke feels better, we’re going out to lunch.”

They rolled their eyes at her, though she watched them smile as they looked down. “We don’t have to do lunch, it’s just a birthday.”

She grabbed their arm and shook it gently, shaking them in the process. They went along with it, which she was happy for. “I’m going to get you something and there’s nothing you can do about it!”

If asked, she would swear she saw them blush, however, they’d vehemently deny it. After a moment, she settled down, still laughing a little at her own actions. Yeah, maybe it wasn’t exactly mature, but she was having fun with her friend. At least, she considered them friends by now. After they helped her in the graveyard without reason, helping get her back to Luke’s when she passed out, she thought they were friends. And based on the way they relaxed when it was just the two of them, she guessed they felt the same. 

“Can I give you a birthday hug, at least?” she asked. “I don’t have anything else for you.”

Rowan paused—they looked somewhere between shocked and disgusted that she’d asked, but there was something else behind it. She didn’t think they were actually offended by the request, just…surprised. After a moment, they nodded and extended their arm. She leaned in, wrapping her arms around their middle, squeezing tightly. To her surprise, they reciprocated and they weren’t awkward or tense. Their arms wrapped around her shoulders and they let out a deep breath it seemed like they’d been holding in for a while. Clary wondered the last time they’d had a hug like that. 

They seemed like they didn’t want to let go when she pulled away, but she could only sit forward like that for so long. She didn’t have the core muscles of a shadowhunter—apparently those weren’t genetic. She noticed the smile on their face, though—they looked soft like that. She didn’t see them smile often, let alone in such a gentle way. 

“Happy?” they asked, inching forward to stand up from the bed. “I should probably be heading back.”

She nodded in reply. “You can stay, y’know. I can get you a sleeping bag, you’re welcome to stay here.”

They shook their head, brushing their hand through their hair a few times. Each time, it only got messier. “Honestly—I wanna get Alec home.”

The realization dawned on her and she nodded. After his outburst (mostly directed at Jace) concerning his relationship with Magnus, it wasn’t a very good idea for him to sulk by himself. She wasn’t happy to think about the real world outside her bedroom at Luke’s—things were better when all that mattered, for a few minutes, was the fact that Rowan didn’t celebrate their birthday. When that was their biggest issue. 

But it wasn’t. They had a world of monsters and villains to deal with, responsibilities to attend to, and problems to be had outside the green walls. She felt a little safer knowing that Rowan was watching her back, though, despite their rocky start. They gave her a little wave as they left the room, closing the door behind them. She wondered if Luke had heard them laughing together and wondered if he’d be happy, even proud. She had a friend outside of Simon? She could hear him asking and laughing now. But on top of that, she seemed to have found a way to melt the icy, cold exterior Rowan put up when they felt threatened, and she was proud of herself for it.

-

[khaleesiofalicante]

“Thank you,” she says softly.

Bapak smiles and kisses the side of her head. “Alright. Maybe we can have some tea before we wind things up-”

Rafael hears a chair scraping against the floor loudly.

“Magnus,” dad says – his voice tight. “Can I use your bathroom?”

“Of course,” bapak nods. “You can use the one in my room. Just keep the door closed so the Chairman doesn’t get out.”

Dad nods and disappears into the bedroom.

He finds dad sitting on bapak’s bed, his face in his hands. Chairman is sleeping next to him.

“Dad?”

The man looks up. He is crying.

“Rafael,” he gasps, hastily wiping away the tears.

"Are you okay?" Rafael asks.

"Yeah," he smiles - it looks so genuine. It's scary. "I'm okay."

"You were crying," Rafael points out.

"Long day," dad shrugs.

"I'm sorry," Rafael whispers.

"About what?"

Rafael points at the door behind him - where he can hear Bapak and Shinyun laughing.

Dad smiles again, gingerly petting Chairman Meow. "There is no need to be sorry. He seems very happy."

It’s true.

Bapak does seem happy.

Rafael hadn’t expected that. Not with Shinyun.

But bapak seems happy. And that seems enough.

Max is suddenly squealing for some reason. Then they hear bapak and Shinyun laugh.

NOOOOOO THEYRE NOT DATING

Dad lets out a little groan. His shoulders shake as he buries his face in a hand. “Fuck. Shit. I’m sorry.”

Rafael runs into the room and sits next to his father on the bed. “It’s okay, dad.”

“I’m happy for him, I swear,” dad says through choked sobs.

Alec is better than me because if the love of my life finds love again on my face I will never be happy again

“I know,” Rafael whispers. “But it still hurts. I get it.”

“Yeah,” dad takes a deep breath and pushes at the corner of his eyes. “Yeah. It fucking hurts.”

“It’s okay,” Rafael hugs him gently. “You’ll be okay.”

“Thanks, Raf-” dad suddenly goes cold and flinches away from him. “What are you doing?”

“What?” Rafael asks in confusion.

“You’re not supposed to be doing this anymore!” dad says in frustration.

“Not supposed to be doing what?” Rafael asks incredulously. “Care about you?”

“You’re not supposed to be taking care of us!” dad snaps. “God. Fucking shit. I fucked up again. For fuck’s sake.”

“You didn’t fuck up. You just needed comfort-”

“You’re not supposed to be comforting me! You’ve done enough!”

“You don’t get to decide that!” Rafael argues. “I want to help you!”

“I don’t want your fucking help!” dad yells.

God Alec you never learn

Rafael lets out a gasp. Tears start to flow.

“Jesus Christ,” dad sighs and puts his face in his hands. “Rafael. Fuck. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you.”

Rafael sobs quietly, looking at his hands.

“Rafe. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t trust me anymore,” Rafael whispers quietly.

“What?” the other man asks.

“I let you down. I ran away. I stopped fighting and I ran away like a fucking kid,” Rafael confesses. “You don’t trust me anymore.”

“That’s not true,” dad sounds offended. He grabs Rafael by the shoulders. “Is this why you’ve been avoiding me?”

Rafael swallows. “I can’t…I can’t look at you without realizing how disappointed you must be with me."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

THIS SCENE. THE MISUNDERSTANDING. *chef's kiss*

[aletterinthenameofsanity]

although I'll leave before the sunrise (I'll be bleeding, but don't you mind, I'll be fine)

Alec Lightwood x Magnus Bane. Malec. Missing scene pre-botched Lydia x Alec wedding. Title is from "Hold Me Closer" by Cornelia Jakobs, which I wrote this whole fic to and directly inspired this fic. Crossposted on ao3.

Alec knows he shouldn't have done this.

It isn't a hard conclusion to come to; it's the only conclusion to come to. This was never a good idea, not when he stepped into Pandemonium for once last glimpse at Magnus before the wedding, not when he let Magnus pull him into a slow, deep kiss, not when he and Magnus stumbled through Magnus' apartment with laughter and gentle teasing and earnest fingers making quick work of clothing and sensitive, erogenous zones.

The hard part is not the question, it's the answer. It's about how he allowed himself to get into this position knowing it would end with him summoning the strength to slip out from under the golden covers and return to his duties and the married life he will be living the moment the blessed union rune hits his skin.

Because the thing is- the bitter, horrible, honest thing is that Alec knew going into this that it was a bad idea. He was well aware of the millions upon millions of reasons why he shouldn't have sought out Magnus for one night together. He was well aware of how much it would hurt to do this, to touch and be touched, to like and be liked, to love and- (he bites back the responding word, because he doesn't think he could survive it being thought) and leave in the morning to marry Lydia Branwell and he still pulled Magnus in anyway. He still let Magnus guide him across the apartment and into the bed, nothing but trust and affection in those golden-brown eyes.

Because Alec is selfish.

Because he knows he needs this. If he is going to sacrifice his life to save his siblings from the ramifications of their stupidity, he wanted one night of happiness. He wanted one night where he doesn't just have to imagine and dream up what uncomplicated affection feels like. He wanted to have one glowing jewel of a memory to take with him the rest of his life, no matter it would hurt after the fact.

And now his eyes burn as he slowly unentangles his impossibly heavy limbs from around Magnus' waist and slides out from under the sheets without waking the man sleeping next to him. Every time he blinks he can see Magnus' smile behind his eyelids, the way his eyes had lit up when he laughed, the way his glamour dropped when Alec kissed him with a fervour he's only ever reserved for training in the past, but he can't let that stop him from getting dressed, from pulling back on his pants and shirt and lacing up his boots. He has to leave early so he can go back to the Institute and punch that training bag to fucking pieces in time to get ready for the wedding.

Alec is careful to be quiet as he pulls his stele from his back pocket, activates his Silence rune, and carefully moves toward the door. He can't wake Magnus before he escapes. He can't bear to look Magnus in the eye as he turns his back on the only good thing he's ever had in his own right, not shared with any of his siblings, not shared with the Institute. This has to be a clean cut. He cannot bear a jagged wound that will fester until the day it blows up in his face.

Alec's hand hits the handle to the exit and-

"You can't do this, Alexander," a voice rasps from behind Alec, and Alec nearly jumps because despite all of his runes, all of his Nephilim senses, he didn't hear the padding of Magnus' feet across the hardwood floor. His body could never register Magnus as a threat, no matter the fact that he owns Alec's bow and quiver, despite the fact that he has Alec's heart tucked in beneath his ribs, forever his.

(Because, some part of Alec's mind whispers, not despite. Because Magnus has his bow. Because he has Alec's heart. Because, because, because.)

"Can't do what?" Alec asks, and his own voice comes out cracking like he never let it during puberty, when all of these forbidden feelings started rising in his chest as he claimed himself a parabatai who would never, could never, know what the pressure Alec kept his feelings clamped tight to his chest meant.

"Leave without looking me in the eye," Magnus says, and Alec still hasn't turned to look at him. He can't bear to look at Magnus undone in the morning, a set of pajama pants slung perfectly low on his hips as he spits, "You've never pegged me as a coward, Lightwood," cruel like he has never been before. But then again, Alec has never been this cruel before, either. He has never hurt Magnus like he is about to hurt him.

"I'm not a coward," Alec says, despite the fact that he is. Of course he is. He has to be. He has to run away from this moment, this beautiful, brilliant, lovely man, if he wants to save his family.

"Then look me in the fucking eye, Alexander," Magnus says, and his voice is wet. Choked. On the verge of crying.

And Alec is the one doing that to him.

A sob is rising to Alec's lips. This is the choice he didn't want to have to make. This is the moment he was so scared of facing.

How can he give up the best man he has ever met? How can he sacrifice the greatest joy he has ever felt? How can he do this to someone who has never been anything but kind and flirty and affectionate toward him?

Why did Alec have to make the stupid decision of leaving Institute last night? Why did he have to meet the right one at the wrong time?

Why does it have to be him? Why does it have to be Alec giving things up, over and over again, sacrificing over and over again for people who he loves despite the fact that they don't always seem to love him back?

Alec has to leave before his sense of self-control slips from his fingers, before he takes off towards Magnus and not towards the door. He has to get out of here while he still has the right priorities in mind, while he can still hold up his siblings' and parents' futures up above his own fleeting happiness.

He swings open the door and runs, choking back everything that wants to rip itself loose.

---

Seven hours later, Magnus enters the Institute chapel, hair pulled up, makeup on, armor bedecked for war. Alec knows him without saying a word, knows what Magnus' lips feel like against his skin, knows what it feels like to shatter someone's heart between his shaking, aching fingers.

And he knows he cannot bear to do it again.

The click echoes across tile floors, not hardwood ones, as he takes a step forward. As he steps down and away from the destiny that has been laid out for him since he was a child laying his hand on his first bow and understanding how this weapon, considered so weak by his trainers, was meant to be his. How he was meant to protect and defend, not to be the hero saving the day with a flashy sword. As he understands that for once, for fucking once, he doesn't have to play the long game. He doesn't have to play the long-range weapon.

He strides forward and his mother puts out her hand and Alec says, "No."

No, I will not trade myself for you.

No, I will not give up golden sheets and golden eyes and a golden laugh.

No, I can't do this anymore, sacrificing everything for you, because it nearly tore me apart this morning and I don't think there will be anything left of me to give if I let you keep taking.

Alec's hands land on Magnus' lapels and pull him in for a desperate kiss. Magnus still smells like sandalwood and tastes of lemongrass and lipstick and if Magnus will let Alec keep doing this for the rest of his life, then Alec will gladly take any moment that Magnus will offer him.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/44650768

[dreamerfound]

Fictober Day 3: Leverage - pushing boundaries

Prompt: “That was not my intention.” Title: pushing boundaries Fandom: Leverage Ship: Alec Hardison/Parker/Eliot Spencer, Mr. Quinn/Eliot Spencer Rating: Mature Warnings: explicit  conversation about sexual activity. Length: 1,211 words Summary: When Eliot stops returning his calls, Quinn decides to take matters into his own hands. Of course, Parker and Hardison have to get involved too.

Quinn leaned against the bookshelf and struck a casual pose even though he was almost positive that Eliot already knew he was there. Eliot turned around and scowled. "How did you get in here?"

He looked tired. Quinn wondered about how much sleep Eliot was getting lately. He tended to burn the candle at both ends a bit more than Quinn liked.

"What, you think I just hit stuff? You of all people should know better than that."

"I didn't mean you picking the lock," Eliot growled.

"Did you mean, what am I doing here when you've been very purposefully avoiding me for weeks." Not that Quinn had been hurt by it or anything. He'd just been worried, that was it.

"I haven't been avoiding you, I just haven't seen you."

"And you haven't picked up any of my calls either."

"I've been busy, doesn't mean you can go breaking into my place, man."

"And you haven't called me back." Quinn pushed away from the wall and took a step closer to Eliot. "I was worried. I thought something might have happened to you."

Eliot studied him for a moment, and nodded, seemingly satisfied with what he saw. "That was not my intention." Eliot raked his fingers through his hair roughly.

"Which part? The not returning my phone calls or the part where you were ducking them, to begin with?" Okay, maybe Quinn was feeling a little hurt.

"That's not what I was doing?" Eliot sputtered.

"Really? So it's been my imagination that you've been avoiding me ever since we sucked each other's cocks."

"Shhh..." Eliot whipped his head around like he was making sure no one was around to hear.

"What, you afraid your teammates are gonna find out? Is that what the problem is? Is that why you've been avoiding me?"

"No," Eliot scoffed.

"Then, what is it?"

"It's complicated."

Quinn sighed. "Yeah, okay." He turned around. "It always is, isn't it?" He started walking. He didn't know what the hell he thought coming here was going to accomplish.

"Quinn, wait."

Quinn stopped and turned around.

"Come on, let me make you lunch while I try to explain it."

He sat down at the table and watched as Eliot sliced chicken into thin slices, doused it in some sort of marinade concoction he threw together, and then tossed it in the fridge. Quinn liked watching Eliot cook. He'd only had the pleasure once before and that time had been a quick grilled cheese. This was a treat. The way Eliot's hand gently gripped the knife, the ease of the way he did everything without even cracking open a cookbook. It was so enthralling it took him several minutes to realize Eliot was stalling. "Thought you were going to explain everything while you cooked," Quinn pointed out.

"Gimme a few minutes here to get everything started. I still have the tortillas to make."

Tortillas to make? Who the hell made tortillas from scratch on a whim? Eliot Spencer, apparently. Quinn watched and waited. Finally, Eliot got to the point in the food preparations that he felt able to have a conversation. "The thing is, me and Parker and Hardison, we're more than just a team."

"Yeah, yeah, you're a family. You've told me this before." Quinn had always thought the closeness of team Leverage was a little odd, but who was he to judge? It seemed to work for them alright.

Eliot looked down at the counter. "Yeah, no. We're a little more than that."

Quinn raised an eyebrow. "You mean y'all knock boots together?"

Eliot looked up, crossed his arms, and nodded. As if he was daring Quinn to make something of it.

"All three of you?" Quinn asked for clarification.

"Yeah all three of us, you got a problem with that?" Eliot's voice was rough and tinged with anger.

Quinn put his hands up. "Whoa, no need to be defensive. I'm just trying to get a clear view of the matter, is all."

"Sorry, it's-" Eliot shook his head, words failing him.

"It's complicated, I get it. So, are you saying that when you and I -- you know.." Quinn rubbed his chin. He didn't want to say the wrong thing and have Eliot putting his fist in his face. "That you were cheating?"

"Nah, that's not it." Eliot turned around and got a cast iron skillet out of the cabinet. "You're kinda my free pass."

"I'm you're what?"

Eliot shrugged. "My free pass. Alec and Parker knew I was interested in you, there was a conversation, and they said they were cool with us starting something or whatever."

Quinn grinned. "You had a conversation about the possibility of hooking up with me?"

"Shut up."

"Then why ghost me?"

"I was supposed to let them know if something happened between us and I hadn't gotten around to it yet." Eliot started rolling out the tortillas and Quinn let the conversation lull. By the time Eliot had the chicken and peppers cooking, they were no longer alone.

Parker punched Quinn on the arm in what he was sure she meant in an affectionate manner but was hard enough to hurt either way. "Hey Quinn, did Eliot finally stop ignoring you?"

"No ma'am, he did not. I had to break in here to get his attention."

Parker's eyes went wide. "You broke in?"

"No, he did not." Hardison planted a kiss on the top of Parker's head and sat down at the table. "He was making such a fool out of himself that I took pity on him and unlocked the door remotely to speed this whole thing along."

Well, that explained why it was so easy to get into this place. Apparently, he'd been invited.

"Move what whole thing along?" Eliot set a plate of tortillas in the center of the table, Parker jumped up to get the plates, and Hardison stayed right where he was sitting as Eliot set the table up with the chicken, and all sorts of little accompaniments to wrap up in the tortillas. It looked and smelled delicious.

"The conversation," Parker said.

"You know, the one where you tell us about your little thing with Quinn and where it's going," Hardison said.

Uh-oh. Had he walked into some sort of trap? He turned to Eliot but he looked just about as freaked out as Quinn felt.

"Can't we just share a meal together in peace?" Eliot sat down and grabbed a plate.

Hardison turned to Eliot. "Do you like him?"

Eliot growled. He actually fucking growled.

"Do you like him? Yes or no?" Hardison repeated himself.

"Yeah, yeah. I like him." Eliot didn't look exactly happy about it.

"Okay, good." Hardison turned his attention to Quinn. "Do you like Eliot?"

Quinn leaned back in his chair and smiled. "Yeah, he's not so bad."

Parker clapped her hands. "Yay!"

Eliot shook his head. "Now can we eat?"

"Yeah, we can eat. Just don't go thinking this here's the end of the conversation," Hardison said.

Eliot shook his head and Quinn smiled. He had a feeling getting involved with Eliot Spencer was going to be a bit more complicated than he'd first thought. He welcomed the challenge though. Especially if it came with more meals like this.

[actuallykiwi]

Inner Dragon  Chapter 5: The Return of Dragons

A long hot bath and a night at the Sleeping Giant Inn later, Annie sat contentedly at a table in the corner of the tavern. The Riverwood tavern was quiet, as early in the morning most patrons had already headed home. She munched on her apple as Kaidan emerged from his room, looking much cleaner and well rested than the night before. “And how are you feeling this fine morning?” She asked as she wiped the apple juice from her mouth.

“Enjoying a warm tavern and a good ale, you’ll get no complaints from me,” he plopped down in the seat across from her and downed the mug she got for him. “Ah, so what about you? How’re you holding up?” 

She thought for a minute. “Feeling much better after a bath. Nervous, maybe? Empowered? I mean I’ve never delved into a ruin like that, let alone to get an artifact as important as this.” She patted the Dragonstone that was nestled safely in her bag. “All in all, I feel... adventurous.” She finished with a smirk. 

Kaidan grinned back at her. “Glad to hear it. Good to get you out of the books, metaphorically speaking.” She rolled her eyes, “Haha, I’m a nerd, I get it.” 

There was a few quiet moments where they enjoyed their breakfast before Kaidan broke the silence. “I am curious about you, though.” Annie looked at him inquisitively. “What did you wanna know?”

“Well, where are you from?” 

“Chorrol, down in Cyrodiil. Not too far from the Imperial City, which is where my brother frequents for the Legion. I was in our city’s chapter of the Mages Guild, so, y’know, hence the nerdiness.” She shrugged. Kaidan scratched his head, “Still unsure what ‘nerd’ means, but I’ll take your word for it. Cyrodiil, huh? You must miss your homeland. I hope the war hasn’t made Skyrim too... unwelcoming.” She laughed dryly. “Yeah, we did get one heck of a welcome party. But thanks. It’s warming up on me.” She smiled at him, and he returned it with a nod.

She cleared her throat. “Anyways, what else did you wanna know?” 

“I know we’re looking for your brother, got any other family out there?” 

“Yup, our parents! Brienna and Jace Sinclair. They’re both back home in Chorrol.” “Do you miss them? Ah, perhaps that’s a daft question.” 

“No no, you’re fine. And yes, I do. It’s only been a couple weeks since I saw them last, but with all that’s happened with Alec, the war, and the dragon in Skyrim...” she trailed off, and Kaidan placed his hand on her wrist. “It must be hard to be away from them right now. But I know they miss you, too. They must be proud of you both.” 

The amount of sincerity in his voice and his grip on her arm surprised her. From the look in his eyes boring into her, she knew he meant every word. It was almost enough to make her tear up, but she smiled warmly at him. “Thank you. It is hard being away from them, but that’s why it’s so important we find Alec. And we will.” “Aye, we will.” He nodded firmly and removed his hand. 

“Sooo, enough about me. Your turn! What brings you to Skyrim?” 

“I’ve spent a long time wandering; this is where my feet led me.” She waited for him to continue speaking. “And...?” He chuckled. “To own the truth, I’ve come back to Skyrim to learn something of my heritage, my bloodline. The few clues I have pointed me here, but it takes time to decode. So, I’m paying my way by collecting bounties.” 

“You have no family to ask?” “No... not anymore. Perhaps I do have blood kin out there, but I’ve never known them.” Annie couldn’t imagine not having a family. Being without hers right now was more painful than she let on, but she was surviving. She studied him a bit more. His skin was a soft honey tan, almost golden like an elf, and somewhat leathery. And his eyes... she had never seen them on men or mer. Sharp, pensive, and a deep crimson-like hazel. The red tattoo that coated the right side of his face was also not familiar to her. “You don’t even know your race? You definitely don’t look like a Nord.”

“No. I was raised as one, by one. But I have no Voice of the Emperor or Dragonskin magic... I don’t even know the race of my mother. All I have is a hunch, but I need proof.” She perked up. “Well, I do like a good mystery! Maybe I could help?” He blinked at her. “You’d do that?” She nodded. 

“I suppose I could use the help. The best clue I have is my sword, but I’m certain we can find out more in our travels.” “You got it. I’ll keep an eye out! And speaking of travels, time to get moving?” 

“Aye. Let’s return that Claw first.” She agreed, and the pair rounded up their belongings and headed out. 

***************************************

The shopkeep was very grateful to have his shiny golden trinket back, and his sister was a little... too grateful. Kaidan and Annie got back on the road before things got too uncomfortable. 

“You’d think with two guys pawning after her already, she wouldn’t flirt with a total stranger, right? She was pretty, though.” Annie thought aloud as they crossed the bridge and started their journey back to Whiterun. “Hey, you weren’t the one getting groped. They can have her,” Kaidan shuddered. “Agreed. She was really forward.” Annie thought about how Carlotta came right out and offered to “pay him back in full” and ran a hand down his arm. “Ohhoho, Miss Annie, do I detect a hint of jealousy?” He grinned slyly and nudged her. “Hah! Not a chance! I’m just using you for your sword.” She teased.

“My sword, eh? That could mean a lot of things...” She turned beet red and punched his arm. “No no that’s not what I meant!! Kaidan!!” He laughed as they trekked on. 

The rest of the trip to Whiterun, they talked more about Annie’s family and shared childhood stories. Eventually, the Plains opened up and they arrived at the city gates around noon. Fog blanketed the land, and the sky cast long grey shadows. By the time they reached Dragonsreach, the fog had mostly cleared, but the sky was still overcast. Annie always loved rain and storms, but this felt... symbolic, somehow. Almost foreshadowing. 

She didn’t dwell on it for too long as they entered the keep and made their way towards the court wizard’s chamber. As they rounded the corner, Annie heard voices. She put a hand up to Kaidan as they stood against the wall. There was a voice she didn’t recognize speaking to Farengar. 

“You see? The terminology is clearly First Era or even earlier. I'm convinced this is a copy of a much older text. Perhaps dating to just after the Dragon War. If so, I could use this to cross-reference the names with other later texts." Farengar rambled. 

"Good. I'm glad you're making progress. My employers are anxious to have some tangible answers." The other voice was female. She sounded impatient.  

"Oh, have no fear. The Jarl himself has finally taken an interest, so I'm now able to devote most of my time to this research." He rifled around some papers.  "Time is running, Farengar, don't forget. This isn't some theoretical question. Dragons have come back." The voice was not quiet. Annie and Kaidan shared a look.  "Yes, yes. Don't worry. Although the chance to see a living dragon up close would be tremendously valuable... Now, let me show you something else I found... very intriguing... I think your employers may be interested as well..."

They shared one last nod before Annie gently knocked on the wall and they peeped around the corner. The source of the voice glared up at them from beside Farengar. A woman in leather armor pinned Annie with her glare, her pale blue eyes narrowed in suspicion and shadowed by a hood. She nudged Farengar without moving her gaze. “You have a visitor.” 

 It took the wizard a moment to drag himself out of his notes.  "Hmm? Ah, yes, the Jarl's protege! Back from Bleak Falls Barrow? You didn't die, it seems.” Annie glimpsed down at herself. “Uh, yeah, it seems not...? Here you go.” She shook her head and handed him the artifact. “Ah! The Dragonstone of Bleak Falls Barrow! Seems you are a cut above the usual brutes the Jarl sends my way. My... associate here will be pleased to see your handiwork. She discovered its location by means she has so far declined to share with me.”  He looked pointedly at the hooded woman, "So your information was correct after all. And we have our friend here to thank for recovering it for us." She now eyed Annie and Kaidan with surprise. 

"You went into Bleak Falls Barrow and got that? Nice work.” With a nod of approval, she turned back to Farengar. “Just send me a copy when you've deciphered it." They exchanged a few more words and the hooded woman began to leave. As she exited the room, she almost ran right into Irileth, who was sprinting into the room. The woman evaded her and scurried out into the hall. Irileth was panting and looked agitated. 

"Farengar! Farengar, you need to come at once. A dragon's been sighted nearby!” She glanced at Annie. “You should come, too." Annie blinked at her and was about to reply, but Farengar quite literally jumped from his hoard of papers and approached Irileth.  "A dragon! How exciting! Where was it seen? What was it doing?" The elf shook her head.  "I'd take this a bit more seriously if I were you. If a dragon decides to attack Whiterun, I don't know if we can stop it. Let's go." She gestured for all of them to follow her, which Farengar excitedly obliged.

Annie looked back at Kaidan. “Fighting a dragon? I’ve been face-to-face with one before but there’s no way I can-” “Let’s just see what’s going on. We’ll go from there.” He reassured her. She nodded, and they followed Irileth up a flight of stairs. 

Jarl Balgruuf was standing in what seemed to be a small war room behind the throne room. He was speaking to a guard that was covered in scorch marks, and seemed worse for the wear.  "So, Irileth tells me you came from the western watchtower?" The guard nodded. “Yes, my lord.” Irileth approached them. “Tell him what you told me, about the dragon.” The guard seemed nervous, scared.  "Uh... that's right. We saw it coming from the south. It was fast... faster than anything I've ever seen."

"What did it do? Is it attacking the watchtower?" Balgruuf seemed to be in deep thought.  "No, my lord. It was just circling overhead when I left. I never ran so fast in my life... I thought it would come after me for sure." The Jarl patted his shoulder.  "Good work, son. We'll take it from here. Head down to the barracks for some food and rest. You've earned it.” The guard nodded and limped back down the stairs. “Irileth, you'd better gather some guardsmen and get down there." Irileth stood at attention. “I’ve already ordered my men to muster near the main gate.” 

“Good. Don’t fail me.” Irileth bowed and stepped to the side as Balgruuf’s attention diverted to Annie, who was watching timidly but stood straighter as he approached. He seemed almost remorseful for what he was about to ask.  "There's no time to stand on ceremony, my friend. I need your help again. I want you to go with Irileth and help her fight this dragon.” Annie eyes went wide. “But, Jarl, I’ve never-” “You survived Helgen, so you have more experience with dragons than anyone else here. But I haven't forgotten the service you did for me in retrieving the Dragonstone for Farengar. As a token of my esteem, I instructed Avenicci that you are now permitted to purchase property in the city. And please accept this gift from my personal armory." 

The Jarl picked up a scabbard from the table and handed it to Annie. She reluctantly took it from him and unsheathed the sword a few inches. The blade of an iron sword gleamed up at her, with a slight fiery glow. “It’s enchanted.” Kaidan noted from over her shoulder with a nod of approval. She looked back up at the Jarl. “Sir, just because I’ve seen a dragon before doesn’t mean I can fight one! In fact, that same dragon almost took my life!” She thought back to the moment the dragon Shouted at her, sending her and several others flying. Her head still sometimes ached from the impact of hitting the wall. 

 Balgruuf placed his hand on her shoulder. “I know it’s scary, but you will not be alone in this fight. From the moment I met you, I knew something was different in you. I still haven’t pinpointed what, but I know that you can do this. Trust your instinct. Trust your friends.” With this, he glimpsed at Kaidan and backed away. Kaidan gripped her shoulder as well and gave her a reassuring look. She glimpsed back at the sword, hooked it onto her belt, and took a shaky breath. “Okay.” 

Annie and Kaidan made their way out as Farengar approached the Jarl.  "I should come along. I would very much like to see this dragon." "No. I can't afford to risk both of you. I need you here working on ways to defend the city against these dragons." Farengar seemed disappointed, but did not argue. "As you command." Balgruuf called out to his housecarl. "One last thing, Irileth. This isn’t a death or glory mission. I need to know what we’re dealing with.” She bowed again. “Don’t worry, my lord. I am the very soul of caution.” With that, she gestured to Annie and Kaidan, and the three of them ran out of the hall. 

By the front gates, Irileth was giving an inspiring speech to her men, who all seemed just as nervous as Annie. Kaidan watched her as she had a death grip on the hilt of her new sword, trying her best to listen to the speech. “You okay?” He asked gently. “Kaidan, I’m not a warrior. I’m not even a soldier! I’m just a mage that loves studying, learning- I-I mean I know destruction spells, and I can hold my own in a fight, but a dragon?? Back in Helgen, I’ve never been so scared in my life, and now I’m being asked to go through that again...” She was biting her nails, but got a nasty shock when she realized her hands were tingling with electricity. “Listen, Annie.” He stood in front of her so she had to look up at him. 

“Remember what the Jarl said: You’re not alone in this. Trust me. I’ll be there the whole time. I swore to protect you to repay my debt to you, and I’m standing by that promise. You can do this.” Annie stopped trembling and met his eyes. He wasn’t grinning, wasn’t frowning. His eyes were filled with fierce determination. He truly believed in her. 

“...The glory of killing it is ours, if you're with me! Now what do you say? Shall we go kill us a dragon?" Irileth finished off her speech with rallying cries from the soldiers. Kaidan held up a hand to Annie. She glimpsed down to make sure her anxiety-driven Sparks had worn off, and when she knew they had, she gripped his hand. He firmly squeezed it, and with a heartfelt, possibly excited grin, he took off running with the group, Annie close behind him. 

*******************************************

It was a short run to the Western Watchtower. But what lie in its place was not a tower, but still-smoldering ruins. The tower was half crumbled to the ground, nowhere near its original height. A walkway and barricades were torn down and burning with still-roaring flames. Worst of all, charred corpses lie scattered amid the ruins. The dragon had definitely left its mark. 

Irileth led the group up to a short hill across from the carnage. “No signs of any dragon right now, but it sure looks like he's been here. I know it looks bad, but we've got to figure out what happened. And if that dragon is still skulking around somewhere. Spread out and look for survivors. We need to know what we're dealing with." She and the soldiers brandished their weapons and charged onto the scene. Annie and Kaidan made their way toward the tower and quickly found something. 

A guard, scorched like the other was, crouched by the doorway inside, trembling. His eyes grew wide when he saw them enter. He shakily stood and shooed them out.  "No! Get back! It's still here somewhere! Hroki and Tor just got grabbed when they tried to make a run for it!" Irileth, who was nearby, came to investigate.  "Guardsman! What happened here? Where's this dragon? Quickly now!"

He shook his head. “I don’t know!” As they approached the bottom of the tower, he froze. His head turned slowly south and he fell to his knees. “Kynareth save us, here he comes again...” 

Everyone turned toward where he was facing, and listened. Sure enough, Annie heard it. It was in the distance, but she knew the sound all too well. A roar. A dragon’s roar. The clouds were still thick and blocking the sky, but they could faintly see a shadow move from the mountain top and disappear overhead. “Here he comes! Find cover and make every arrow count!” Irileth found a spot by the crumbled walkway and readied her weapon. Kaidan pulled Annie over behind the tower where a small outcropping covered them. 

They all waited. Listened as one last roar, much closer this time, echoed just overhead. It was quiet. Still, as everyone held their breath and watched the skies. 

Then the dragon dropped from the clouds and snatched up a guard from the walkway in his mouth. With a sickening crunch, the dragon flew back above and flung the guard’s body back to the ground. Annie was going to be sick. 

A war cry rose from the brave troop as they unleashed all they had upon it. Arrows and spells sprang up from all directions. Kaidan unsheathed his own bow and landed a few himself. Annie stayed behind him as he crept around the tower and followed the beast wherever it went. The dragon made a few laps around the premises, then landed with an earth-shaking crash. It took a breath, “Everyone get down!!” and Shouted. 

Flames roared out across the ruins as everyone ducked for cover, some not so lucky were still out in the open. Kaidan yelled and covered Annie behind a broken wall. Even through him, she could feel the immense heat that surrounded them. Once the fire stopped, everyone brave enough emerged from their hiding and began to strike it again. Annie found herself hyperventilating on the ground as Kaidan stood up from shielding her. “Stay here!” He shouted, and went back to attacking. 

She was doing everything she could to calm down. Her pulse was racing, her vision was blurry, she couldn’t breathe. She watched from behind the wall as men began approaching the dragon and attacking head-on, but the dragon’s strong jaws had them quickly, and they were gone. She closed her eyes and willed herself to calm down again. 

Suddenly, everything went quiet, and time seemed to slow. The sounds of the battle were muffled. The fire that raged from the beast roared around her, a distant rage. Her gaze found Kaidan, who was rising from his cover and launching another assault. Kaidan, a stranger fast becoming a friend, who believed in her. Her brother Alec, somewhere out there, probably looking for her too, believed in her. 

She was terrified. The sparks igniting her whole body at this point proved it so. But now was the time to use that fear, and prove them right. 

Something burned within her. Something shifted within her, and she found herself standing up from the rubble. 

The dragon paused, very briefly, and made eye contact. Its face registered something which she would later realize was recognition. The guards were doing a number on it, but it wasn’t enough. 

With her body still running on pure adrenaline, and whatever fire was now raging inside of her, she mustered all of her magicka into her hands, and struck out towards it. 

An amount of electricity that could instantly kill a man was pouring from her outstretched arms. She was screaming, but you couldn’t hear it over the shock. 

It wasn’t killing it, but it certainly caught the dragon’s attention. With it distracted for just long enough, the other men moved in and hit it once again with everything they had. It was Irileth that dealt the final blow, with a sword through its head by way of its eye. Its other eye met Annie’s again, this time with fear. And then she heard something she never expected. She heard it speak, to her. 

“Dovahkiin!? No!!!” 

Irileth removed her sword, and the beast collapsed, lying still. Annie fell to her hands and knees, all of her magic drained from her. The handful of surviving men were already rejoicing. Irileth approached the body. “Now let’s see if this overgrown lizard is really dead.” The guards approached with her, but froze in their tracks. 

The body was igniting. Flames appeared from inside it and engulfed it. “Everyone, get back!” Someone yelled, and they all ducked for cover. All except Annie, who was still too weak to stand. Kaidan rushed over to her and tried to help her up. “Annie!” 

She was barely standing when the body was fully ignited, and then a strong wind moved through. Something was coming out of the dragon, and into her. The shock of the absorption knocked her out of Kaidan’s grasp, but she was still barely standing. This power flowing into her was blindingly burning, but felt... natural. It wasn’t forcing its way in, although the force was strong. The dragon’s body dissolved into nothing but bones, as if all its life force was now moving into Annie. 

After a moment, it finished, and all the wind and fire faded away. Annie dropped to one knee and began panting. “By the gods... what just happened to you?” Kaidan knelt next to her and placed a hand on her back, but quickly snatched it back. She felt like she was on fire. 

“I don’t.. I don’t know...” All the others were gathering around her, silent with awe. One guard stepped up, his mouth agape. “I can’t believe it... you’re Dragonborn!” Annie used Kaidan’s shoulder as a crutch to help herself stand. She was cooling off and touching the metal of his armor, which he was quietly grateful for. “I’m a what?”

“Dragonborn. In the very oldest tales, back when there still were dragons in Skyrim, the Dragonborn would slay dragons and steal their power. That's what you did, isn't it? Absorbed that dragon's power?" The guard explained. Annie felt her chest. She was warm, but not burning anymore. That roar and power that she felt earlier was louder now. Whatever just happened, it definitely awoke something within her. “I mean... it certainly felt like it...” 

“There's only one way to find out. Try to Shout... According to the old legends, only the Dragonborn can Shout without training, the way the dragons do." The other guards began debating the legend. Annie looked down at her hands. They were still hers, but they felt... different, somehow. Stronger. She felt stronger. Kaidan was watching her intently. “How do you feel?” She looked up at him. “Honestly? A little freaked out.” He chuckled. “But... I feel stronger, somehow. And really, really warm. And my chest kind of, burns? Not like heartburn, but like... something is... alive. Am I making sense?” Kaidan chuckled again and shook his head, “Not really, but after what just happened, who knows?”

The men had dragged Irileth into the debate. They finished arguing, and looked back at Annie. "If you really are Dragonborn, like the old tales, you ought to be able to Shout. Can you? Have you tried?" She looked at Kaidan. He shrugged. She sighed and walked a distance away, facing away from the handful of survivors. 

She definitely absorbed something from the dragon. The burning in her chest was working its way up to her throat while she thought. Okay, Shouting. I can do that? Think, Annie. If dragons can Shout, that means it’s in their language, right? What do you know about their language? Nothing really. Except... one Word... from the Barrows... The burn sat dead center of her throat. She envisioned the physical form of the Word she saw, how it engulfed her vision, how she heard and felt it through her entire body. She gripped her fists, and took a deep breath and, 

“FUS!”

The volume of her Voice shocked her. She couldn’t help but cover her mouth out of surprise. She Shouted. “I did it...” She whispered. 

The others gasped and murmured. The same guard from before approached her.  "That was Shouting, what you just did! Must be. You really are Dragonborn, then..." Annie turned to face Kaidan, who was right behind her, his shocked face matching hers. “Well, I’ll be damned... I’m traveling with a Dragonborn...” She couldn’t help but nervously chuckle. 

"That was the hairiest fight I've ever been in, and I've been in more than a few. I don't know about this Dragonborn business, but I'm sure glad you're with us. Jarl Balgruuf will want to know what happened here. I'm taking command here for the moment. You head back to Whiterun and let the Jarl know what happened." Irileth seem unperturbed by the discovery, but impressed nonetheless. Kaidan nodded and gently guided Annie back to the road and towards Whiterun.

“This... changes everything, doesn’t it?” She asked aloud. “It only changes what you want it to. You’re still Annie, just, a little louder now.” She chuckled. “I never knew I could get that loud.” He shook his head. “Quick way to win an argument, though.” 

Annie was beginning to feel a little weak by the time they reached the city stables. It felt like the heat was wearing off, and she was back to feeling the drain of her magicka. She stumbled a bit, and Kaidan caught her arm over his shoulders. “I’ve got you.” 

They had just made it past the first gate when a loud clap of thunder shook the earth, sending them tumbling to the ground. But through the rumble, Annie heard the unmistakable Shout, 

“DO-VAH-KIIN!” 

Her head was ringing. She couldn’t hear anything, even Kaidan who was shouting something in her ear. The world was spinning and everything was fading away. Somewhere, she heard Kaidan call her name, and then all went black. 

Previous

[alexanderlightweight]

I was going through all of the writings that you have posted and rediscovered the Kelpie au. So if you have more of it that has not been posted, can we have another taste? I just love it

oh gosh so most of kelpie!au hasn't been posted because it's at like 20k and it's mostly smut.

so i'll have to post to ao3 and post links here probably

here we go! i picked something some that file with Cat & Alec since i wasn't sure if you wanted nsfw/sfw and i've only posted sfw for that fic so far i think

its finally named undertow because @saeths insisted

lumine

-

Brunch relaxes again and Cat thinks she could get used to this again, seeing her family happy and being happy with them

Later, when it’s more night than day and Ragnor has convinced Magnus to follow him to his library, Cat sits alone with Alec. 

“Tell me?” She asks quietly, hoping he will. Normally she would ask Magnus directly, but she never wants to put that look on his face again. 

“I’m not really sure I understand it. It doesn’t make sense to me. I mean I don’t know why Magnus does most things.” Alec pauses and takes a slow sip of his drink. .

“I’ve been mostly eating the foods Magnus is introducing me to, but it’s not quite the same. Most of it is delicious but it’s not filling. So he hunted me a meal, took me to a lovely little grotto and insisted on watching.

“It didn’t go well?” Cat asks in surprise. “Magnus has never been squeamish.” 

She, Ragnor and Magnus have all participated in the deep rituals. They’ve all eaten still beating hearts and cracked the bones of the Elders to suck down the marrow and claim the power in them. 

Alec scoffs and shakes his head. “No, he was actually pretty excited at first. And then I got about three bites in and got a mouthful of ash for the fourth. He disintegrated the body and dragged me home and then kissed the taste of blood from my mouth for hours before he let me sleep.”

Cat blinks. 

This is not the problem she was expecting.

“He tried to explain it. Something about how he can’t stand me being so intimate with anyone else.” Alec actually snorts, a dry sound, “apparently, even if it’s a corpse. Which is normally fine. Except eventually I’ll need to eat and it’s going to upset him. He’s already upset that he ruined my meal. He just also doesn’t regret it, which upsets him more. I think maybe he’s not used to having so little control of himself.”

Cat blows out a breath and looks across to where Ragnor and Magnus disappeared.  

“I’ll look into it, see if I can’t find something that will help keep you healthy until Magnus figures it out.” 

Alec shrugs, like it doesn’t really matter to him. 

“I don’t really mind. Magnus is the one who is really suffering.”

“Oh?” Cat asks with a raise of her brow and Alec grins, a mischievous little grin that just oozes smugness.

“No more blowjobs for him. I can’t control my instincts when I’m this hungry and neither of us want to risk his cock. He’ll break and find a way around it before I get too hungry. 

Cat laughs and shakes her head, relief flooding through her.

“Alright then. I’ll send over some tinctures and supplements. They’ll keep you healthy until this gets worked out. Ragnor and I will intervene if needed.” And they would, because to keep Magnus safe and sane, they needed Alec healthy and whole. 

Alec looks at her carefully and then he smiles, his-too-sharp-too-many teeth gleaming and Catarina remembers suddenly that he too is a predator.

And he chose to be prey. 

“Thank you, Catarina. But we’ll be fine. Magnus will figure out his instincts sooner or later. I’m very good at waiting.”

There is a wealth of hidden meaning and Cat nods, looking at Alec with a new light. 

“Call me Cat.” She offers, the first time she has and Alec nods, respectfully acknowledging the change. 

He reaches out and presses his knuckles to hers gently, “I’m Magnus’ Alexander, call me Alec.”

Magic sparks between them and Cat smiles as the magic of names settles smoothly between them.

Alec withdraws his knuckles and raps them against the second, empty glass with a sigh.

“I liked this one. Which one was it?”

She summons a new one and tells him. Alec takes a moment to stare at the glass in betrayal before he picks it up with a sigh.

“Magnus is going to be obnoxious, just so you know.” He warns and Cat smiles at the dry humor in his tone.

“Oh?”

“Yeah. I  liked the barley tea.” Alec rolls his eyes, “Magnus is going to take this as inarguable proof that he’s right.  Next thing I know, he’ll be trying to make me oats and molasses again. And I don’t think I’ll get away with accidentally knocking it off the balcony this time.” He gives her a morose, pathetic look. “He put up wards the third time I accidentally knocked food off. Apparently it landed on some mundane and nearly killed him. But Magnus was more worried about why I was being so clumsy than the mundane. I told him it was allergies and now he won’t even let me go to the park without warding me for protection… against pollen.” 

And Cat laughs. She’s still laughing when Ragnor and Magnus rejoin them. The pair are red cheeked and bright eyed and Cat knows they’ve had a delightful and scathing disagreement about literature.

Ragnor is clearly pleased to see her happy and Magnus flutters like a hummingbird. He presses a delighted kiss to her forehead and hugs her from behind for a moment and then darts over to Alec. He’s hovering around him, little tiny constant touches and Alec merely leans into them, smiling up at Magnus with a softness that transforms his face. 

Her boys are doing well and Cat finds she doesn’t mind adding another to the number she claims. 

Not this time.

[vaguelyrotten]

To Hell With the Consequences - Chapter 10

Alec Lightwood knows danger - as the son of a prominent criminal family, it's something he's intimately familiar with. However, a chance encounter at a club proves that there's more out there than he was originally aware and he finds himself suddenly thrust into a world where All The Legends Are True.

The Fallen Angel that possessed Valentine was now the one fully in control, and his form was more creature than man.The shadows surrounding him became one swirling, wicked mass. ‘You think one pathetic little blade is enough to stop me?’ the creature taunted in a voice that was inhumane and certainly not Valentine’s. ‘I was a general in Lucifer’s army. I led hordes. I even know your father, little warlock.’

Magnus snorted from his place next to Alec. “That’s nothing to write home about. My father gets around. It seems half of the Shadow World knows him at this point.”

‘He was once a great general himself — before he strayed too far from the path and decided to become a coward instead. He could have joined us in our venture but he decided to hide in Edom where our brothers and sisters can’t reach him? He’s weak, just like his children are.’

Alec held out his hand to stop Magnus from doing something rash as his boyfriend growled at the Denarian’s words. “It’s over, Anduriel. Magog and Namshiel are gone and can’t help you any longer. No one else standing here is stupid enough to pick up any of the other coins. You’re alone. I’m giving you this one opportunity to walk away before we absolutely destroy you.”

Anduriel gave a long, slow chuckle. ‘Puny mortal — you think you can defeat me? I’m older than you can possibly imagine. I’ve seen the rise and fall of civilizations. I’ve stood against God and come out stronger for it. And you? You weren’t good enough to host the Sorcerer of the Order. Your parents knew that you were weak which is why they sent you to Valentine knowing that you would likely not return. It was their way of getting rid of you, you know? They were far too willing to get rid of their oldest son. You are flawed, after all.”

“Don’t listen to him, Alec,” his sister stated as she and Jace took a few steps closer. Alec knew that they wanted to make sure that he knew he wasn’t alone —  the Lightwood children have always stuck together. “You aren’t flawed. You’re our big brother, and we love you.”

Alec’s grip tightened on the sword in his hand, and he tried not to let the distress show on his face. His parents had never been okay with him being gay. He’d had to come clean to them a few years ago after they’d tried to force him into a marriage that would have brought more power and wealth to the family name. His mother had insisted that it was just a phase that better end quickly, and his father had told him that he better reconsider his beliefs if he still wanted to be part of the family. He’d almost let their words get to him but Jace and Isabelle had stood by his side, and eventually, begrudgingly, his parents relented though they’d never come to terms with the fact that their heir would never marry a woman. 

Anduriel scoffed, and the shadowy figure turned it’s attention to his sister. Alec tried to push her behind him but she stood her ground. ‘And you - another Lightwood child who is nothing but a disappointment. They had such high hopes for you after their eldest turned out to be useless to them but then you had to fall into the dugs and couldn’t control yourself. Not only that but then they learned that you were sleeping with the enemy? Tsk, tsk, Isabelle Lightwood. You proved yourself to be worthless to them too. First they get rid of your brother and then they will get rid of you. It is all just a matter of time.”

“And what about me, you overgrown cloud? You want to tell me how I failed Maryse and Robert too?” Jace asked, and Alec had to bite back a comment about provoking the thing that was currently trying to kill them. 

“You were never theirs, of course,” Anduriel responded, rising to Jace’s bait. ‘You will never be related to them by blood. There is no future for you with the Lightwood family. You are disposable - why do you think they gave you so many dangerous jobs. They were hoping that one of these days, something would do you in and you would finally be out of their hair. With all three of their children gone, they will been able to start again — raise another heir who will take over the family empire and continue the family name the way that they’ve always wanted.’

“That’s enough, Anduriel,” Magnus snapped, his magic angrily sparking at his finger tips. “You’ve said your peace. Alexander has kindly given you the chance to leave before this ends poorly for you and you didn’t take it. What happens next is at your own hand.”

‘Oh, but I’m not done yet. You didn’t think I’d forget you did you?’

“I’m four hundred years old. Rest assured, whatever you’ve got to say to me I’ve already heard. There’s no need to repeat it,” Magnus replied coldly. 

Anduriel laughed again - the sound was really starting to grate on Alec’s nerves. ‘You may have heard it but they haven’t. What’s the fun in knowing secrets if I keep them all to myself? Have you told your new boyfriend about Camille? Or the time that you spent with your father? You pretend to be a good man, Magnus Bane, but you are anything but. Have you told him anything about all the lives you took when you served in Asmodeus’ army? How about the years you lost because Camille had you wrapped around her little finger? You would have done anything for her, and it worries you that your memories of that time are nothing but a giant void.’ He giggled like a child, and Alec watched Magnus’ eyebrow twitch in reservation. ‘The shadows remember what you did though — would you like me to tell you?’

“Enough!” Magnus growled, hurling a ball of magic at the shadowy vortex even though there was nothing tangible to hit. 

The vortex grew in size, and even though they all tried to take a couple of quick steps back, it quickly enveloped them and cast them into endless darkness. “Magnus?” Alec tried calling out, using the light from the blade of the sword to illuminate the space around him. “Jace?” He tried again when his boyfriend didn’t answer. “Iz?”

“You’re all alone, Alexander,” Anduriel taunted in a voice that sounded far too much like Magnus’. “No one wants you. You thought I loved you? You're a pretty face but nothing more. I’m the High Warlock of Brooklyn and you’re nothing more than a powerless mortal. There’s nothing you can give me that I couldn’t get from someone more useful than you. You were a fleeting interest — a new toy that I could play with before I got bored and tossed it aside - and nothing more. I will never love you, Alec, no one will ever love you. You’re destined to spend your days in the shadows — forgotten by everyone around you while the world moves on.”

“Stop it,” Alec growled, trying to remind himself that the voice speaking wasn’t actually Magnus and was simply Anduriel playing tricks on him. “That’s not true. Magnus loves me — it’s how he was able to break me free from Namshiel’s possession. Give me back my boyfriend and my siblings. Stop playing pathetic games.”

“I’m right here, Alec,” Isabelle’s voice sounded this time though it was still tainted by that hint of darkness that told him that it wasn’t actually his sister speaking. “But I don’t want to be. Out of everyone in the world who I could have gotten for my big brother and I got stuck with you. You can’t protect me. You can’t protect any of us. We’d be much better off with someone stronger and more useful as our brother. We don’t love you, Alec, no one does. Mom and Dad were right that you do nothing but bring shame to the family.”

“She’s right, Alec,” Jace’s voice came this time before he could react to Anduriel’s words as Isabelle. “They’re all right. Magnus. Maryse. Robert. You're useless to them — that’s why they were eager to adopt me. They could finally have the son that they always wanted. Someone who was worth loving. That will never be you.”

“Enough!” Alec yelled, finally tired of all the whispered lies. Amoracchius shined brighter in his hand, and he suddenly knew what he had to do. Ragnor had told him all about the sword’s history before Namshiel had taken over once more, and in all of Anduriel’s taunts there was one common thread - the very thing that had been one of Alec’s greatest insecurities and deepest fears. He took a breath to calm his mind and blocked out the mocking voice of his mother that Anduriel was using. He focused on his love for his siblings and for Magnus and tried to channel all of his feelings into his core. When he felt like he could no longer hold all of his feelings inside of him, he released them. In one smooth motion, he flipped the sword in his hand so the tip was pointing downward and slammed it into the ground. 

The world exploded in bright white light, and Alec squeezed his eyes tightly shut so he didn’t blind himself. He could feel the tension that had been gathering dissipate entirely, and when he was certain the brunt of the spell had passed, he chanced opening his eyes. The whirling void vortex was gone and in it’s place was Valentine. He looked weaker and older, like Anduriel had drawn on his strength. The coin housing the Denarian was spinning on the concrete between them.

A whip of electric blue magic snapped and stole it, and Alec realized that he was no longer alone. What Alec had done had released his siblings and his boyfriend from the spell as well. 

“What did you do?” Valentine panted, his voice strained and quiet. 

“When you sent me to retrieve the sword, I was lucky enough that Ragnor Fell was able to free me from Namshiel’s clutches for a few blissful moments. During that time, he told me all about this sword and what it could do. Did you know that each sword belonging to the Knights is protected by a holy power, and using the sword against the principles it upholds would break it? Amoracchius is the sword of love…and you know what? You and Anduriel were never going to succeed. The moment you ordered me to use the sword against the man I love and my family, it was over for you.”

“Love,” Valentine spat though it was clear that he was still far too weak to argue. “Love can’t save the world. This isn’t a children’s story.”

“A wise man once told me that all the stories are true,” Alec replied, before turning his attention to the man who had stepped up next to him. “Mags — I don’t suppose you have a deep, dark hole that you can stick him where he’ll never be able to bother anyone again?”

“I can think of a few places,” Magnus agreed with a hum, twisting his wrist and spinning open a portal. “Cold, wet, dark places that no one ever goes too. How do you feel about living the rest of your life in solitude? Where the only company that you have are the rats who would love nothing more than to make you their next meal and the spiders spinning their webs around you?” Valentine tried to protest but Magnus’ magic was quicker, pushing him through without hesitation.

“You didn’t really send him somewhere to get eaten alive by rats, did you?” Alec asked with a wince as the portal snapped closed. “I know he’s legitimately evil and all but that seems a little much.”

“Rest assured, Alexander,” Magnus replied with a chuckle, turning to cup his boyfriend’s cheek. “My father may be a demon but I’m not that evil. He’s been dealt with properly — I deposited him on the steps of the FBI’s headquarters, hogtied, and with a note. I’m sure they’ll have plenty of questions for him and a very secure place to keep him. Now, the real question is what shall we do with this?” he asked, the coin hovering over his open palm. 

“And the other two too, I suppose. Namshiel’s is in the middle of the Hudson…and I would guess Magog’s is as well since Johnathan never rejoined the party. And, well…all of them. Valentine had us retrieve as many as we could. He wanted it to be a real family reunion when the ritual was completed.”

“We can find the ones in the river eventually. The water will actually quiet the spirits inside them for some time. And assuming the other ones were in that wooden box that Malcolm grabbed when he portaled out like a coward, we can track those ones down easily enough because he can’t hide from me forever. Currently, I’m more concerned about the wrong person getting their hands on Anduriel’s and starting this whole fiasco over.”

Alec knew that Magnus had a point — if they needed to put any of the coin’s somewhere they could never be found, the most important one would indeed be Anduriel’s. “Those deep, dark holes you talked about? You think any of those would be a good place to send it?”

Magnus grinned and the coin disappeared in a shower of sparks with a snap of his fingers. “I think depositing it at the bottom of the Marianas Trench would make it quite difficult to retrieve don’t you?”

He didn’t bother replying — now that the danger was passed, and Anduriel’s coin had been dealt with and there wasn’t anything else looming in the near future, Alec only had one thought on his mind. He grabbed Magnus’ jacket and pulled him against him and into a deep, heated kiss. His siblings were forgotten though he was vaguely aware of his sister cheering in the background.  His boyfriend’s hand went to his hair and the little tug that he gave had Alec weak at the knees. 

“You freed me in more than one way, Magnus Bane,” Alec whispered when they finally broke apart. “Even before I went to work for Valentine and before I was possessed by Namshiel, I didn’t realize how lost I was. Meeting you that night at Pandemonium was a blessing in disguise. Yes, it was a demon attack that brought us together but I’m glad that Clary decided to celebrate her birthday at your club that particular night because I never would have known what I was missing otherwise.”

“I had given up on love before I met you,” Magnus admitted, brushing a thumb over Alec’s cheek gently. “What Anduriel said about Camille was true. She ruined me in unspeakable ways, and I was certain that I’d never love again. For almost a century I’ve closed myself to feeling anything for anyone. Man or woman. You’ve unlocked something in me.”

Before Alec could respond, he heard someone clear their throat behind him, and he turned to find Jace glaring at them with his arms crossed. “You two need to get a room. Some of us don’t want to bear witness to the both of you getting down and dirty in the middle of a theme park. This is a family venue…not to mention it’s downright unsanitary.”

“Jace!” Isabelle exclaimed harshly, smacking the blond on the back of the head. “The park is empty and you literally can’t talk. Don’t think we all don’t know about what you and Clary got up to behind the boat house in the Hamptons last year.”

Jace tried to protest but Isabelle wasn’t hearing it. She held up a hand to stop him before turning back to Alec and Magnus with a glare. “Don’t think you’re off the hook though, big brother.” She took a few steps and closed the distance between him. “This,” Isabelle nearly yelled as she punched him harshly in the arm. “Is for not telling us how much danger you were in. And that,” she said, punching him in the same spot a second time. He knew he was going to have a bruise. “Is for not telling us that you had a boyfriend!”

“I didn’t exactly have the time, Iz. You know how busy Valentine was keeping me. I wasn’t trying to keep it from you. Why do you think I told you to go to Magnus if something happened to me. I knew you’d find out eventually,” Alec tried to plead. 

Magnus held up a hand to quiet them before they could bicker any longer. “Might I make a suggestion? We’ve all had quiet a hard day and we pretty much just saved the world. I think that calls for a celebration don’t you? I happen to know the owner of a very well known club in the city, and he would absolutely love to treat our little gang to a few rounds of cocktails on the house. And it just so happens that very club is the same place this whole thing started. Might I suggest we move this to Pandemonium? There’s a VIP booth and a martini calling my name right about now, and forgive me for being too forward but I haven’t gotten to spend much time with my wonderful boyfriend as of late and his hair is looking extremely tuggable right now. The things I’d like to do to him.”

Alec felt a blush rise to his cheeks and Isabelle chuckled, saving him from having to stumble through a response himself. “We’ll take you up on that drink, I think, Mr. Bane but I think the rest of that is probably better without an audience. I’m not sure Alec’s explored all his kinks yet but voyeourism is probably not something he’s ready to dive into just yet.”

Magnus laughed as Alec gaped. “Not yet, my dear, but there’s time enough for us to find out in the future.” He snapped his hand and a portal opened in front of them. “Your chariot awaits, Lightwoods…Let’s go home.”

[onetimetwotimesthreetimess]

cant bilive 50% people hate hiadt magnus and the fic isnt even out yet. can we get a soft magnus snippet?

The second Alec hits the bed, he falls asleep in an instant.

It had been a particularly difficult day, full of casualties and his heart felt so heavy and hopeless.

Alec knows that he can’t save everyone but every patient that he loses feels like a personal loss.

And the day isn’t over yet.

He’s still on call which is why he decides to take a nap in the on-call room, even though all he wants to do is go home and crawl into his own bed, into his husband’s arms and sleep.

But Magnus isn’t on call today. He’s at home, probably taking a long bubble bath in their massively big tub.

Before he can ponder more over the events of the day, his eyes droop low and he falls asleep.

He doesn’t know how long it is before there’s some light from outside, indicating that someone else entered the room.

Alec groans slightly and turns, smashing his face in the pillow to avoid the light.

The lower bunk where Alec is laying dips slightly and then there are strong arms surrounding him, pulling his back closer against the chest and Alec lets out a soft sigh at the familiarly of the body.

“Magnus?” He asks sleepily.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Magnus replies and places his hand over Alec’s stomach.

Alec frowns and turns in his arms. It takes a lot to open his eyes but he manages somehow.

“Why are you here? You’re not on-call today. You were at home.”

Magnus smiles softly at him and cards his fingers through Alec’s unruly hair, “heard you had a terrible day.”

Alec sighs and shuffles closer to the other man and lies down half on top of him, trying to merge their bodies into one.

“Horrible day,” Alec pouts, “But you didn’t have to come. You had a long shift till this morning.”

Magnus pulls up the blanket and covers the two of them properly, knowing that Alec always runs cold.

“There’s no way I could chill at home when I know that you’re having a bad day. And when I know that I can make it better,” Magnus replies and pushes a hand inside the back of Alec’s scrubs, running soothing circles.

“But baby—“ Alec drags the ending of the word and pouts but Magnus closes the distance and places a soft kiss on his lips.

“Just shut up and sleep, love.”

Alec has been with the man for years and this isn’t the first time Magnus is doing something like this way. He always goes above and beyond for Alec but these things still fill his heart with warmth and tenderness.

“Okay.” Alec puts his head back on Magnus’s chest and feels a kiss being planted on his head.

“I love you.” Magnus mumbles.

It’s another few minutes before Alec whispers.

To Magnus.

To himself.

To the world for bringing the man to him.

“Magnus.”

“Hmm?”

“Thank you for being here.”

[solarisrasa]

All I Could Bring Myself to Want is You pt 5

A Malec fic canon divergent from the moment Alec hands the Family Ring back to Maryse Lightwood.

Read it here on Ao3

part four

Awareness came slowly, rolling over Alec like syrup and leaving him feeling sluggish. He pushed himself up, familiar and much missed golden sheets pooling around him, and squinted around the room in the fading light. It took longer than he liked for his mental functions to grasp his surroundings and the time.

  Angel, how long was I asleep?

He scrubbed a hand over his face, blinking rapidly. He could hear the low murmur of Magnus’ voice and decided to make himself slightly more presentable before facing his possibly-maybe-boyfriend.

After a quick trip in the bathroom and a change of clothes, entirely his own this time, he steeled himself and headed to the living room.

Magnus was sitting in his blue chair, head tipped back and phone held to his ear.

“Cat, I will tell you when I think it’s a good time. For right now, let us try to straighten ourselves out.”

Alec paused, then decided he might as well sit down. Magnus would notice him in a second anyways.

“He’s awake now, so I’m going to go. Give my love to my Sweetpea and tell her I’ll visit soon.”

Alec missed Madzie too, but he had no delusions to Catarina’s feelings for him and respected her right as a parent.

“Goodbye Catarina.”

Magnus sat upright, lowering his phone, and looked at Alec with a small smile.

“Sorry. She’s been...concerned. About both of us.”

Alec nodded, “You’re her best friend. I’m surprised she wasn’t angry I was here. Well, not angry enough to show up at least.”

Magnus frowned at him and Alec looked at his folded hands. He felt off-balance again. He was well-rested for the first time in forever, Jace wasn’t with him, and he had no idea where to begin with Magnus.

“Are you hungry?”

Reflexively Alec shook his head. He was hardly ever hungry, too focused on just pushing through each minute to do more than eat for sustenance.

“Well I am. Thai sound alright?”

He smiled a little at the easy way that Magnus worked around him and nodded, “Sure.”

Magnus stood with easy grace, flourishing his hands, “Salad rolls and a green curry still your preference?”

He nodded again, thinking about the flavors of the dish and realizing he was actually a little hungry. Probably a by-product of sleeping for so long.

He sat quietly while Magnus placed their order, talking for an extra minute when the man on the line asked why he’d stopped ordering for so long. Alec couldn’t help but relax a little listening to him talk. With a promise of an extra tip and the usual no questions asked about how he picked up the food he finished the call.

Magnus started making himself a drink, silence settling between them. Alec watched him move, drinking in the sight of him in deep red and brown. He’d missed the flash of rings and the extra movements that made it seem like everything Magnus did was a dance. He didn’t realize how long he’d sat and just watched until Magnus was holding a glass out too him. He took it slowly, smelling it first and raising an eyebrow at the faintly tropical scent.

“It’s a little sweet, I thought you might need something, you seem...tense.” Magnus explained, stepping toward the blue chair.

Alec’s hand shot out, wrapping gently around Magnus’ wrist.

“Will you sit with me?”

Magnus looked at him, his own clear drink in his other hand, and smiled. He stepped and sat with exaggerated movements and arranged himself beside Alec so they could brush against each other if Alec shifted just a little.

“Better?”

Alec leaned toward Magnus so their arms touched and sighed, “Yes.”

Silence fell between them again and Alec took a sip of his drink, approving of the sweet coconut flavor immediately.

“These seem a little more dramatic than your usual style.” Magnus said, tapping a finger to one of the runes on Alec’s cheeks. Immediately he averted his eyes, taking a large drink and playing with his ear cuff, “That was terribly clumsy of me Alexander, I apologize.”

Alec shook his head, “No. Magnus, it’s okay. We’ve agreed to start over but we aren’t actually back at the beginning. I just, I don’t know what to tell you first or what you’ve guessed or know or what’s just me overthinking things I-” He sat his drink on the coffee table and turned to face Magnus properly, “I’m so grateful that you’re willing to try again. I know it’s going to take us a while to figure this, us, out and I am trying not to just dump everything in your lap at once. I want to tell you  everything. Hand on the Sword I will eventually, but for right now it’s probably better if you ask whatever pops into your head otherwise I’ll never say anything.”

Magnus raised an eyebrow, “That was rather self-aware of you darling.”

Alec blushed, “I’ve had a lot of time to think about how I managed to screw up before. I’ve also had a lot of input on those thoughts. Jace and I haven’t back off the bond in nearly a year. Today is the most muted it’s been in ages, and it’s only a little quieter. It’s still not comfortable to talk so much but, I have too.”

Magnus inclined his head, his brown eyes searched Alec’s features for something, “So, these?”

He brushed his knuckles carefully against Alec’s cheek.

“Yeah. One is for mom. I want to talk about that, with you, but not...not tonight. The other is for...everything else. You, Clary, all the parts of me and Jace, everyone we did lose in Alicante and the future that  almost was.”

Magnus nodded, then tapped his own cheek.

“I was already going to bear the one for mom, but someplace private. Then we were called to Alicante to give an account of the changes that had happened at the Institute. I received a lot of uncomfortable attention while we were there and there were, and still are, a lot of misconceptions about what happened between us. After a talk with my dad I decided to wear them where it would be plain to everyone that I was too damaged to consider the things they wanted from me.”

Magnus took his hand, grounding him, “What did they want?”

Alec swallowed. He didn’t want to explain this so early into their tentative reconnection, it laid too many things on the table and yet… He knew he loved Magnus and the Magnus still loved him, whatever else was in their way.

“It’s a common saying, that Nephilim love only once. I don’t know how true it is, it’s hard to quantify, but we aren’t a fickle people. When we really, deeply, love we do it for life. It’s rare to hear of someone losing a lover and finding another, but not so unusual to hear they marry or remarry for political standing. Bloodlines, family, it’s important to us. Usually when someone from a family with good standing loses their lover, or often if they don’t fall in love before a certain time, it’s almost expected that they will make a political or social match. It’s why there wasn’t a lot of question around my proposal to Lydia. She had already lost John and I had never looked twice at anyone.”

Magnus had a carefully neutral expression, listening without comment or judgement but his hold on Alec’s hand had tightened.

“It was well known that you were the only person I’d ever really been with and with you gone and an unclear picture of what happened it was widely assumed I would be entering an  arrangement. Especially after I’d stepped down and with rumors flying about being an outcast in the Downworlder’s eyes. I didn’t know how to stop the assumptions and was in very real danger of losing it if I received another offer when my dad talked to me. Mourning runes are symbolic and to wear them prominently after a loss, especially romantic or familial, implies a lack of desire to move forward, a need for time. We almost never wear any rune on our faces, so-”

Alec broke off, gesturing with his free hand to the stark lines on his cheeks. He reached for his drink again, keeping his left hand in Magnus’, and sipped too give himself something to do.

Magnus sat his own glass down, taking Alec’s hand in both of his and rubbing his thumbs over the back.

“I know you Alexander and I know what it must’ve cost you, to wear your pain like that. I am sorry you felt like you had to, but I am also selfishly glad that you chose to. I can’t speak to how Nephilim love, your people are frighteningly good at keeping such things deeply buried, but I know how I love, how I hope you do and the thought of you trying to force yourself into another match for ‘honor and family’ is unbearable. If you want to keep them, it is your choice, but I hope you know you don’t have too. We didn’t hide the first time and I certainly don’t intend to now. Downworld politics be damned.”

Magnus brought Alec’s hand to his lips and Alec smiled softly. Trust Magnus to see him and to know what he needed to hear.

“I haven’t decided yet. Everything has, well, it’s happened so fast. Again.”

Magnus laughed then and it eased the seriousness that had encased them, “We don’t do things by halves Alexander.”

They smiled at each other and Alec felt the spark of magnetic energy that Magnus always created in him pull at him. He finished his drink and set the glass aside, reaching for Magnus. He smiled and came easily into Alec’s embrace. They paused, noses brushing and just breathed one another in before Alec could take it no longer.

Their last kiss had been painful, a goodbye that Alec had been too weak to resist and Magnus too desperate to savor. This kiss was soft, a relief to the core of each of them and a gentle hello. Magnus’ lips were warm against Alec’s and the lingering stickiness of his coconut drink flavored them as they moved together. Alec sat his large hand on the back of Magnus’ neck, holding him gently as he deepened the kiss.

Magnus relaxed into him, his own hands framing Alec’s face as they pressed against one another. They parted enough to look at one another, neither moving their hands, and Alec had to blink quickly as moisture gathered in his eyes. Magnus’ cat eyes looked back at him, a tear rolling down his cheek and sliding into the crease of his smile.

“Hello Alexander.”

“Hi.”

They moved together for another quick kiss and then parted slowly as Magnus’ phone buzzed. Magnus looked more relaxed and Alec smiled at the sight.  

“Our food is ready. Dining room?”

Alec hummed, “Balcony?”

Magnus pretended to think about it but couldn’t stop the creeping grin and the way he looked at Alec made him warm someplace that had been cold for too long.

“Go, snap us our dinner. I’ll grab the forks, and some water.”

Magnus winked at him and stood, brushing his hand against Alec’s shoulder as he went to the balcony.

  Angels, he’s beautiful.

-

When they finished eating Magnus pulled Alexander through a portal for dessert, the two of them sitting in a gelato shop in Italy. It was easy to fall into gentle conversation, Alexander told him about Izzy and Simon and how exasperating it was to constantly walk into the middle of conversations that he wasn’t sure were private trying to deliver his and Jace’s field reports.

Magnus kept his own topics light, mostly musings about redecorating parts of the loft and updating his closet. They were careful to keep away from more heavy conversation but it didn’t feel stilted or unnatural, just like had both agreed to set it aside for a little while.

The shop was quaint and Alexander spoke Italian beautifully, the result of the Latin he’d grown up speaking as easily as English. Magnus had found that tidbit fun, he’d always assumed Alexander simply had a passion for the language or at least a functional need with how often it cropped up in Shadow world dealings. Instead it seemed that Nephilim were all able to speak it and often used it as a universal language when dealing with Institutes around the world.

“I see that Shadowhunters are almost as secretive as warlocks when it comes to matters of culture.”

Alexander’s brows furrowed as he thought and then he shrugged, “We don’t have a lot of need to share ours. Most of it relates to doing our duty or to personal relationships and well, those typically only involve other Nephilim. We never really talked about this stuff before, I don’t know if there are any traditions I ignored for you?”

Magnus laughed, warmed by the consideration, “Not really. There are some vaguely outlined ideas about formal courting. We are an immortal race you know, we hold onto some pretty outdated things sometimes. It’s not required or expected of any non-warlock, or even a young warlock, to know anything about those. Usually formal courting is only done between two warlocks who intend to bind themselves together, a permanent, or at least  very long, commitment. Otherwise most of our culture is tied to celebrations, our laws, and, of course, markings.”

He hadn’t thought before he rattled off the list, swirling the last of his gelato playfully with his tongue but Alexander went still. He swallowed around the cream in his mouth, ready to apologize when Alexander looked back at him, smiling tightly.

“These more than one kind of mark then?”

Magnus winced, “Yes.” He spoke softly, wanting Alexander to understand, “We leave them on those who mean a great deal to us, those who mark our lives, those we love. Sometimes we leave little things on those we dislike as well, though it’s less common. Here.”

He rolled up his sleeve and let Catarina and Ragnor’s marks show. A soft white symbol and a green bloom on the inside of his forearm, raised just enough to indicate they weren’t tattoos.

“These are marks of lifelong friendship, they signify the bond between the three of us, our promise to stand together and to protect and care for one another through all of time. This-” He shifted up his other sleeve to show a pretty yellow flourish, “is a mark of gratitude and friendship from Tessa. These marks are permanent. Not all of them are and I have borne a great many marker of thanks, of fun, of fleeting friendship, and a few that symbolized my opposition of another. Usually we only wear those in times of deep unrest, a sort of declaration of loyalties and lines in the sand. All but one mark is consensual and painless.”

Alexander reached out and touched just under Catarina’s mark, “I’m glad you have these.”

Magnus watched him as he traced the marks with his eyes, “I’m not the only one of us who bears one.”

Alexander flinched, “Magnus-”

“Why didn’t you let Cat remove it?”

He shook his head but didn’t answer and Magnus frowned.

“She told me she offered to and you refused. I know it hurts you, why did you tell her no?”

“It’s my choice.”

Magnus ignored the warning, pushing, “But why make the choice to keep it?”

“It’s my body-”

“It’s hurting you.”

“I don’t notice it anymore.”

“Let Catarina remove-”

“I don’t want to!” Alexander’s voice cut up sharply and Magnus blinked. Gone was the relaxed man he’d managed to coax out, in his place was a hard mask and tight shoulders. Magnus sighed, he’d let himself believe that everything was fine for a moment too long.

“I’m sorry. It’s...It’s my decision Magnus. I-” Alexander was visibly struggling and something curled tight around Magnus’ lungs.

  If I push him too hard he’s going to leave me again.

The thought rose unprompted and Magnus forced himself to breath around it. He’d been caught up in how well they’d managed to come back together he’d not allowed himself to think in detail about how they’d fallen apart.

He saw the shuttered look in Alexander’s eyes and he could remember with perfect clarity the same expression in the low-light of Maryse’s shop. He could remember the pain in Alexander’s face on the balcony outside his office when Magnus had been too drunk not to lash out.

“It’s alright. I’m sorry too. It’s not my place.”

Alexander nodded slowly even as Magnus clenched his jaw. The gentle music that had been soothing a moment ago danced on his nerves now and he sighed, “We should get back. Jace is going to be back soon.”

Again he got a nod. They cleared their small table in silence and Magnus portaled them back to the loft from just outside the shop.

“I need a shower.” Magnus said, stepping away.

Alexander’s warm hand closed around his forearm and he turned slowly to find him looking determined.

“Magnus, nothing is going to make me walk away from you ever again.”

Magnus blinked, breathing in slowly, “You can’t promise that Alec.”

“I am. I can’t control what might happen to me or what you do, but I am never going to be the one who chooses to leave or who chooses for you again. I just...I need you to know that.”

Magnus wanted so badly to believe it but he knew he wasn’t quite the same as he had been before Edom, he knew they were going to have to address the new power thrumming under his skin. There was also the returned immortality and all the rest they had yet to address both about their year apart and Magnus’ past. Alexander had heard some of the ugliest pieces but certainly not all of them.

“I know you want to make that promise.”

Alexander’s expression tightens and he swallows visibly.

“Magnus…” He looks so lost in that moment and Magnus’ heart aches for them both. His expression shifts to one of familiar determination and Magnus braces himself, Alexander always surprises him and this is no different.

“I want you to look at my memories.”

Magnus stared at him in awe. Alexander knew what he was offering, knew that to share memories was to share every emotion he felt in that moment and that it was a terribly vulnerable thing to do.

“Please Magnus. I-I can’t stomach you not knowing how I feel about you, or not trusting it. If I can show you, it might easier than trying to explain everything and I need you to know how much I love you.” Alexander sounded frantic, his hands raising to frame Magnus’ face, “Please.”

“You don’t have too.”

“I  want to. Please.”

Magnus covered Alexander’s hands with his own, “I will, if you still want me to tomorrow. We’ve had a trying couple of days-”

“I slept almost all of today.”

“For what sounds like the first time in a year? Alexander, trust me, we can do this in a day, maybe two. We have  time.”

At that Alexander seemed to finally relax and Magnus pressed their foreheads together.

“We’re doing remarkably well darling, there’s no need to rush everything. You said it yourself.”

He felt another nod and smiled gently, “Let’s take a step back from trying to get everything in the open right this second. I do actually need to shower but first, how’s Jace?”

The blonde had wiggled his way into Magnus’ heart along with Isabelle and Simon and his connection with Alexander only made Magnus love him a little more. He worked hard not to show it so much, it wouldn’t do for Alexander’s family to realize how strong a hold they had on Magnus, or how hard it was going to be for him to face them. He was in many ways grateful that Jace had come attached in full this time and had been the adult among them for once.

“He’s…” Alexander frowned, “I’ve been getting the usual from him when he see’s Clary, but he feels...scared, but in a good way?”

Magnus shrugged easily, keeping his immediate concern out of his expression, “Well, maybe that’s a good thing?”

“Yeah. Maybe.”

Magnus watched Alexander’s distracted expression go a little vacant as he concentrated on his parabatai. After a long minute he gasped.

“Somethings happened. I don’t know what but he feels overwhelmed and so...it’s good, whatever it is.” Alexander was smiling now but it was edged with concern and Magnus waited for more.

A minute later Alexander’s phone rang and he grabbed it with a grin.

-

“Jace? Right?”

Jace’s heartbeat picked up and he tried not to show Clary how much this was affecting him as he affirmed, tried to keep himself under control as she touched him for the first time in a year.

He’d felt Alec wake up a while ago and it had been a whiplash of emotions from him since. Things had seemed to be going well until a few minutes before Clary had looked at him and he’d been thinking about heading back earlier to check in on what had caused the sudden desperate hopelessness in Alec. It had leveled off into something quieter though and Jace had relaxed. He had committed himself to staying out of their way this evening and had expected turmoil in the bond.

Now he was so glad that he hadn’t bolted to be with Alec at the first sign of trouble, he would have missed this moment entirely.

“I’m sorry, I-” Clary started again, frowning at her own hand on his skin, “I uh, have this memory problem.” She laughed a little and it was both a wonder and a source of sorrow for Jace, “No one knows for sure what happened to me but I’m missing a few things. We might have met somewhere in there because I definitely know you but I don’t remember how?”

Jace gave her a quick grin and watched her pupils dilate, “Well if you don’t remember me very well, you’ll just have to get to know me again.”

He winked and she laughed, a little incredulous, “Are you serious right now?”

“Deadly.” He schooled his expression into something mock serious and she laughed again.

“Okay. You’re crazy huh?”

Jace rolled his eyes, reveling in her presence, “I’m not the one who remembers strangers.”

He wanted to take it back as soon as he said it, watching her eyes narrow and her lips purse.

“You know, normally I’d call you a jackass for that but, I almost want to laugh. Who even are you dude?”

Jace laughed this time, a little strained and a lot on edge, “I’m complicated Clary. If you want, I might be able to help you with your memory though? Because, yeah, we knew each other a little. I’d need to make a phone call first?"

Clary looked behind her with a torn expression and Jace hurried to add, “Don’t ditch your exhibition for it, I can wait. Let me trade numbers with you and we can meet up later.”

She gave him a considering look and his traitorous heart jumped, he knew when she was going to say yes by now, “You just want my number, huh?”

He held up his hands, “You got me. Beautiful, talented artists who only sort of remember me are my weakness.”

She held out her hand and he sat his phone in it, watching her tap in her number and text herself.

“I’m going to go back inside, but if you don’t mind a late night, I’d love to catch up after?”

Jace grinned, “I’m a bit nocturnal nowadays.”

She looked at him funny but just smiled, “See you later, familiar Jace.”

“See you soon.”

She didn’t look away from him until she had to turn to go back in the building and he ran a hand through his hair looking around in disbelief before quickly calling Alec.

“ Jace?”

“Alec. She remembered me. She knew my name.”

part six

[khaleesiofalicante]

Hey again ,how are you? Hope you're doing well and getting some rest. I love the back to back updates (even though I can't bring myself to read them yet, again, like I said, still a little obsessed with IALS but I will soon!) but you need to sleep and rest and take a break my friend! So,when I told you I'll be spaming you with my IALS feelings, I meant it. This is all your fault though, you are too good of a writer😭

Okay IALS scenarios that I can not stop thinking about, I have some theories about them that I will share later:

Where did all of Max's trophies go? Why did Magnus and Alec take them down in the first place?

I would love Lance's reaction when he realized that the song he played for his audition as a kid is the song that brought his parents together, I think he would act all disgusted by how gone they are for each other but would be secretly pleased and kinda happy about it on the inside because he's secretly a softie🥰

I would really like to think they get married eventually, maybe one day after they move to France, they kids are there to visit them and David walks downstairs and he sees Max cooking with the kids and laughing, they way they did when the kids were little, before the divorce and thinking, damn I have to make that man my husband again (officially)

I can't stop thinking about the first time they kiss or the first time they have sex in the same bed or when they move together (I know they don't mean that David is all healed but they're still pretty big milestones and must have meant a lot for both of them)

I also can't stop thinking about them in France, David going to the place he ran away from and doing it with Max, I can't even imagine how that conversation went before they agreed to do it, it must have been really difficult for both of them

I remember Max telling Arthur that he'll let him know the next time he washes his hair so he can teach him how to braid them, I can just see Arthur needing more than one time to get it right and David tagging along, you know, for research 👀

I know David loves Max's tattoos too much and eventually (after many years perhaps) did eventually made him strip and asked (kissed and licked) about every single one of them (a girl can dream and I dream big)

I kinda keep thinking about how Mavid running into Jaden again would go. Or even Mona, I have to admit I'm more curious about Mona, what can I say, I think about jealous, possessive David, I melt away, I'm a basic bitch

Completely unrelated, but the "I love you. I'm going to kill your dad. But I love you" quote you posted from your new fic scares me. I have many theories, but I really hope it's Max saying it to David. The pour guy didn't even get to punch the sadistic prick in IALS. He deserves compensation

Okay, that's about it for now, I'll go back to uni stuff. Have I mentioned how much I hate uni stuff?? Do you feel that way about work stuff too? Or do you actually enjoy it? Seems like a silly question but I'm curious, okay byeee🌷

PS: Song rec~ You are the reason by calum Scott and Leonard Lewis, I keep thinking about David playing this on the piano for Max and I just can't function🥹

LISTS AND SPAM? MY FAVE! LET'S GO!

They took it down with Max's permission and at his request. I think Max didn't want it anymore because he didn't want to be defined by it - and he didn't want his boys to feel the same pressure (We already saw Lance feeling it a little). Although I don't think malec threw it away. They know how hard Max worked to win every single one of them. It's probably in a storage unit :)

He would definitely find out about it (because he is watching the show now). I think if he was with Theia he'd sniffle a little. If he was with his parents he'd be like 'ew wtf is wrong with yall'. (as if this hypocrite doesn't compose music for his gf lmaooo)

I see it happening very much like that. It's not a big moment. Just a soft realization. It's a 'he is still here' and a 'i am ready now'.

I was extremely tempted to write this scene. But it did not make sense in the epilogue. I did not want it to be rushes so I left it out :(

Very difficult indeed. Also for Max - because it's a place that cost him a lot. A place that reminds him of Mallory. Moving to France is a symbolism of a big step. Bigger than even marriage or sex. It's a 'i'm not scared anymore'. They might not be fully healed (and perhaps never will) but they are not afraid of that anymore and that's beautiful.

I MISSED THIS FLUFF AHHHH

He did he did he did

One can never get enough of Jealous David content. Although I can see them meeting Jaden again and a lot of passive-aggressive comments lol. Of course Lance was there to serve cunt. Tempted to write this too...

You shall wait and see :)

I am fortunate enough to pick and choose what kind of work i wanted to do and what to avoid. so i mostly like the work i do - i just find it tiring because it's a lot. but of course even among the stuff i do choose, there are bits i don't like and hate (and it's often other people who make it feel so). if you ever want to rant about uni stuff or just wanna talk about it, you know where to find me x

ps - THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVE SONGS OMG.

[haomnyangz]

gab’s neverending 2022 shadowhunters renaissance gifs: never forget how tall dark and handsome bewitched mike from glee