#which is very painful and something I think Thranduil probably avoids

[imakemywings]

So Doriathrin sounded old-fashioned even in the First Age, which makes sense since Elvish language already changes very slowly and Doriath was comparatively isolated relative to other Elvish settlements (and was already known to have preserved some linguistic characteristics that had become archaic in other dialects). It was also destroyed, which largely prevented much further development of the language owing to the people being made more or less extinct.

Furthermore, since Oropher and Thranduil’s later kingdom was made up of a far larger proportion of Silvan to Iathrim, I tend to think they adapted their speech to that of the Silvan, whether speaking Silvan or adjusting their Sindarin to match with the speaking patterns and idiosyncrasies of the Silvan.

However, in the rare moment Thranduil speaks directly to another former Doriathrim without any one else present in the conversation, he will revert to what he grew up speaking and they will twitter away like they just walked out of Chaucer.

[honourablejester]

Kindly forgive a random burst of ego, but I’m reading back through Northern Babylon, a dieselpunk LotR AU I wrote back in 2015, and … okay. I think I did pretty good on the worldbuilding? I mean, looking at it with D&D on the brain for the past year or so, I feel like the city of New Rhovanion would make a pretty good Eberron-ish campaign setting.

A Metropolis-esque dieselpunk fantasy city, built by a semi-forced alliance of elves, men and dwarves driven from their previous homes (Moria, Mirkwood) by the encroaching Southern Powers, some of them very dark (Dol Guldur).

A city of vertical layers, the vast stone-and-ironworks of the dwarves at the base, carved into the stone of the mountain the city rings, the vast transplanted forestscape of the elves at the top, a towerscape of gardens and glasshouses and aqueduct gondolas, and then the homes and markets of men in the lakeside district and the middle heights of the towers.

A city torn apart in recent memory both by the occupation by a dragon in elven disguise which temporarily drove out the dwarven and human inhabitants, and resulted in significant structural and racial damage during the insurrection that followed, and then later the results of a vast continental war that, while it didn’t do too much direct damage to the city besides airstrikes on the elven towers, still left a lot of scars.

A city struggling to rebuild itself, both in terms of buildings and relationships, in the new and sudden peace, where almost all the old enemies have been defeated, and it’s time for old grudges to possibly be laid aside and new cooperation build once again. Possibly.

Like, this bit:

The city had been spared most of the ravages of the war in the south. They'd held off Mordor's advance south of the Running, managing to avoid military occupation, though the Lake District, the still-extant swathes of Mirkwood Forest, and the surface towers of the city itself had taken some damage. The first two had been the cost of stopping the Easterling ground advance, something Gimli knew had a much higher cost in lives, dwarven, elven and human alike, than it had in infrastructure. The latter had been the result of Nazgul airstrikes relatively early in the war, before the Thornhoth Eagles had driven them back south and the land war in Gondor had taken up too much of the Witch-King's attention to bother with anything north of Dol Guldur.

The strikes hadn't done too much serious damage. Not to the structures themselves, at least. New Rhovanion's towers had held strong against dragonfire bombs less than a generation ago, things that could melt rock and steel and concrete as easily as flesh. They'd withstood the explosive anarchy of Smaug's terrorist campaign, when over half the city's dwarven and human populations had been forcibly expelled, and urban fighting in the undercity had killed hundreds more. Nazgul overflights, for all their potency as a terror weapon, just didn't have the same kind of destructive power.

They'd taken chunks out of the city-top forestscape, though. Now that he had the eye for it, Gimli could see the places where it was still under repair. Several of the vast tiered balconies and the street-spanning aqueducts had given way altogether, even now still in the process of being rebuilt, and there were a thousand strange shards of sunlight to be seen as the great glasshouses and refracting mirrors were moved and repaired across the upper city. Worse than that, though, at least for those to whom mattered, were the vast barren stretches where the forests and gardens themselves had been burned away, leaving only cold concrete, melted steel and blacked earth behind them. The great hanging gardens of New Rhovanion, the city-top cathedral of light, had apparently taken the brunt of the city's physical blows this time.

It was strange for Gimli to find himself noticing that, to find himself understanding the pain of it. Dwarves in New Rhovanion didn't spend a lot of time looking upwards, after all. They had their own section of the city to be thinking about, the vast underground mines and thoroughfares, the lower reaches of the towers and the surface streetscapes where the city monorails and the vast ironworks lived. The Ereborean District, carved back into the mountain and the rock beneath the city, its oldest and purest part, was where Gimli had spent so much of his life. It was strange for him to spend so much time looking upward, moving upward.

He'd changed, though. The war had changed him, the things he'd seen, the things Legolas had shown him. He had an idea, now, what that damage meant to the elves of New Rhovanion. He'd seen his elf's face when their train had finally pulled into sight of the city and the scars across its upper reaches had become obvious. He'd seen the blankness that had slipped into Legolas' eyes.

And somehow, because of it, here he was. Gimli Glóinson, an Ereborean dwarf born and bred, standing on a balcony on the side of the Greenwood Oropherion Tower, trying desperately not to think about how many hundreds of feet too high into the air he was. Below him, down at street level and just above it, the great central depot of the Iron Rail Company spewed trains out onto the raised tracks above Oakenshield Avenue, and lighter engines onto the magnetic monorails a few storeys above them. With the repaired mirrors on the upper reaches of the tower filling the street canyon with light almost all the way to the bottom, it was terrifyingly obvious exactly how many feet above that familiar sight he now was.

It wasn't the same, the heights compared to the depths. He'd looked into chasms hundreds of feet deep in Khazad-dûm without a qualm, the great bridge spans of the subterranean Dwarrowdelf inspiring more awe in him than terror. That had been no less of a fall. With the artificial electric suns, no less visible a one either. He knew that. It was just ... it was different up here. It was different on the surface, on one of the tallest towers in New Rhovanion, on some flimsy elven balcony that had blasted tree roots sticking out of the bottom of it. He could see half the city from here. More to the point, he could see how it was all beneath him.

He should have stayed inside, he thought desperately. He should have kept to the interior atrium. The balconies and rooftops and external terraces were the realms of the elves, but the towers that bore them all up were still dwarven construction. The internal shafts, insulated from the sheer external drop and lit exclusively by light refracted from above, had managed to stay comfortably subterranean in feel despite the best efforts of their human and elven occupants. Even the Greenwood Oropherion, the great bastion of Wilderland Elvendom, full of light and water and greenery and with as much of the exterior reaches open to the elements as elvenly possible, hadn't been able to disguise the solid, quintessentially dwarven nature of the stone it was built in.

Like. I feel like I did good there? I feel like that has teeth and potential. Heh. A dieselpunk fantasy city, with a lot of wars behind it, and a tentatively hopeful future.

And this little description of High Elven Councillor Thranduil:

He'd seen Thranduil Oropherion before, of course. Mostly in newsreels, but from a distance as well. The Elven High Councillor had a talent for being seen looking imperiously downwards from various heights, and had a particular fondness for the skycars and the aqueduct gondolas. He was easily recognisable, wearing those long, almost archaic greatcoats the elves favoured, all bronze and green, with his long golden hair bizarrely braided back with something that looked for all the world like live ivy. Even the most deep dwelling, surface-averse dwarves could recognise Thranduil on sight.

He looked a little different now. Some of it was the informality of his dress. Gimli was almost positive that few, if any, dwarves had ever seen the Elven Councillor in shirtsleeves and waistcoat before, his hair looped back into a tail that was, yes, held with an actual trailing plant, for reasons probably only an elf would know. It made him look smaller, somehow, maybe a little bit more fragile. Not quite the distant, impressive creature he usually appeared.

Why do I have so much more fun with worldbuilding and characters than I do with things like, you know, actual plot?

[idjitlili]

Dildo Gaggins

Thorin x reader

Warning: periods

Summary: being apart of the company , and forcing them to stop, but not telling them why.

Word count:2085

You had joined the company due to Gandalf pretty much forcing you to, you parents were kidnapped by orcs when you was a preteen. So not very long ago , being only 18, you had lived on the road eating berries and such. That was until Gandalf had found you and raised you, he was like your adopted father.

You were guilty for wanting revenge on all orcs, they had taken your childhood away from you by slaying your parents. You weren’t going to let that go easily.Anyways you joined the company , Thorin was livid by the idea of a women human no less joining his company. Gandalf pretty much told him to fuck off, and that you were coming along know what matter what he said.

Anyways once you met Bilbo you were quick to befriend him, comforting him by cleaning that wooden thing kili wipes his boots on. Getting the mud out the rugs and such he was very much grateful for your help.

You had been on your hands knees scrubbing at the rug , which one of the dwarves had spilled wine on it. You had a bowl of water and a rag with soap , you had been working at this stain no longer before someone had shouted a comment at you.

“Miss y/n , you should get on your hands an knees more often..” you had looked up to see one of thorins nephews , kili starring down at your arse. You scoffed at him , pulling your long button up shirt over your behind. Fili along with some other dwarves such as bofur had laughed. Unknowingly to you Thorin had eyes your butt too, but sent angry looks to his nephew, for speaking to a women in such a way.

“My daughter isn’t some toy, Prince Kili, next time you will be a worm, Mark my words.” Gandalf has shouted pulling him by the ear away from you.

“She’s your daughter ,mister gandalf?” Balin , Dwalins older brother had questioned, once Gandalf had let go of kilis ear. You now sat up onto your calves , the rag on your thigh. “No, he has raised me since I was 11, my parents were kidnapped, by orcs probably eaten.” You spoke calmly, Balin felt guilty for bringing it up, other looked at you with sincere faces.

“Gandalf might aswell be my father.” You spoke smiling up at Gandalf who did the same, you stood up bringing the bowl and rag to the kitchen. Bilbo had followed you as you poured the water away. He looked at you curiously ,”so you are going with this company?” He had questioned you , eyeing you for a response.

“Even if I didn’t want to go, I would be stuck at home and b e bored to death. An adventure sounds great actually doing something significant in middle earth.” You spoke with meaning, you didn’t want to be a nobody and you would get to meet elves and other humans. Maybe you could meet someone.

The little hobbit smiled up you “you have a kind heart Miss y/n “

“Just y/n. I think we are going to be good friends mister baggins.”

“Me too..y/n.” You leans down and ruffled the hobbits hair , playfully.

That was a months ago now, you now and the rest of the company except Gandalf who left at the edge of Mirkwood, were deep in Mirkwood forest. You were walking along side Bilbo , you suspected that you lot would get lost. You were feeling great until a huge cramp hurt you like the waves of the ocean. You groaned clutching your stomach for a second, losing your breath slightly. Bilbo looks up at you in concern ,”are you okay y/n?” He questioned you , before you could speak you felt liquid in your pants. “Don’t worry about me, I’ll be back.” You speak quickly , running towards Thorin who led the group.

Thorin had gained trust for Bilbo , apologised for in judging him, he still didn’t like that you were apart of the company. sometimes he would get mad when you accidentally did something, yet when they had been captured by the trolls he’s had made sure they had not got a hold of you, knowing they were vile and would do horrible things to you.

Thorin heard you approach him , turning his face slightly to look at you , then turning back to ahead of him in seconds.

You walked with him , until you catches your breath from running, “Thorin please can we stop , not even for two minutes it’s an emergency.” You pleaded , “we will stop once we are out of this place.” You knew he wouldn’t listen , there was no point even trying. You scoffed “fine.” you spoke angerily , before running ahead and going deep into the forest so no one could see you.

Unknowingly to you Thorin had made the company fasten their pace with him , to catch up, Bilbo angrily shouted at Thorin , whole kili and Fili asked where you had gone. Thorin had told the company to stay there while he went into off the path looking for you. At this point you were strapping bunches of cotton to yourself, to stop you bleeding through your pants. You were pulling up your pants when Thorin had found you.

You had gasped when you had seen Thorin , him in shock to see you pulling your trousers up from your knees. “Why did you follow me?” You spoke angrily , walking past him , leafs crunching under your feet as you watched back to path.

He stomped after you,” you cannot just run off like that to urinate .” He shouted towards you, you turned to him shoving him backwards. “I wasn’t going to the bathroom, it’s none of your business.” He scoffed at you “it is my business , when I am supposed to protect you , and I can’t do that when I can’t see you .” His eyes shining slightly , yet still harsh.

“I’m sorry I just didn’t want to bleed through my pants infront of 13 dwarves.” His eyes softened at your words , before you know it he has embraced you into a hug , you wrap your arms around his waist , as his arms around your shoulders. “W-what ar-“ before you can even finish question, you and Thorin are attacked by spiders. Thorin tried to fight them off but before you know it you are wrapped into cocoon with Thorin.

Now Thorins arms are around your waist while your hands against his chest. Heavy breathing waiting for death, that was until the cocoon landed on the ground. Allowing Thorin to rip it open, for you to jump up avoiding the pain in your stomach, lending a hand for Thorin. You heard that men didn’t really know of periods ,you figured that Thorin must of dealt with his sister when she had them.

Once you were able to take in your surroundings, you see the other dwarves getting out of cocoons , and their were spiders coming in on you all. Soon enough you all are fighting off these giant monsters. That is when more come only for them to be killed instantly by elves.

The elves search you all, this blond one searches you , yet he gets down to remove the knife from the holster. He stands up with the knife passing it to an elf. He looks at you frowning . “ you are injured.” He spoke with a monotone. You look at him confused before your eyes widen, elves must be able to smell very well. “...uh no I am not.” He shakes his head ,” you are bleeding.” Thorin groans angrily at the elf.

“Yeah..but It’s not an injury..uh mister elf. It b-becau-“ you are interrupted when a female elf with ginger hair whispers to the blond elf, his face flashes red in embarrassment. “I am sorry miss.”

And that was it , you all were brought to Mirkwood , all the dwarves were put in cells except Thorin and you (you were human but whatever) who were brought to the king, he looked like a narcissist.

Thorin insulted Thranduil , The king , when he offered a deal for our freedom for some hens. Thorin rejected in spite of Thranduil not helping his people when they needed so he wasnt going to help him in anyway.

“And why are is a women travelling with dwarves?” He had spat the word dwarves with disgust as he had circled you , to make himself superior to you. When you obviously thought he was anyways , god he was king.

“Uh.. because I want to sir.” You looked at the floor, he made you feel quite uncomfortable, he laughed in response.

“Ah, I see , you are their toy.” He smirked, you gasped at his words , you face flashed with anger.

“I see the way you must treat women , you disgust me. You probably do it because you are jealous.” You walked fowarded to him glaring before you continued “you know because you already dress like one, if your voice was an higher then I would’ve mistaked you for a women..” his face slightly twitching in anger you walk closer smirking. “Maybe the main reason is because you lack down there or maybe because daddy Di-“ you are interrupted by a slap in the face, Thorin is about to leap forward for Thranduil, but the guards grab ahold of him , but you slip past the other guards grips. You lung forward smashing your knuckles into his face, making him bleed. He quickly gets the guards to take you both to the cells.

You are both thrown into the same cell, he grabs you stopping you land on the floor, You smile at him lightly.

One of the dwarves asks what happened , he says something in dwarvish an insult probably, and then tells him what you had done, the others cheer. You slide down onto the floor , Thorin doing the same shortly after directly next to you. You had forgotten about the pain but now it hit you like horse. Distractions such as trying not to die , take your mind off cramps. You clutch your stomach.

Thorin eyes you gestures, “are you cold?” You look up at him, “I’ll be fine Thorin.” Yet he doesn’t believe you , he places one arm under Under your knees the other on your back, picking you up placing you in his lap. Your mouth is struck open in shock, as he wraps his arms around your stomach, you Lean back into his chest.

“Elves suck, that princess literally sniffed my vagina.” You groan at the fact you just said that to a king. He chuckles “I’m not surprised,he probably wanted you to be his prince to his princess.” He speaks into your neck, his breath tickling your neck.

“Damn I doubt anyone would want me, have you seen me.” You laugh sarcastically, “it will never happen” your eyes water, as a child you were cute you were asked out many times but you rejected them all because you were frightened, until you were 15 and fell in love with a boy that ended up breaking your heart and you didn’t even date! It made you feel ugly and more insecure then you had even been.

“I think you very much mistaken. I know someone thinks you are the most beautiful woman he has ever met, I have seen plenty of those dwarves eye you up.” His thumb thst lay against your hip went under your shirt to stroke your bare skin.

“Oh..what who?” You are surprised, Thorin had never spoke to you in such a way he had always been blunt with you , or avoided you, now you lay against him in his arms. He presses his lip to you cheek before whispering in your ear “me.” You gasp at his answer, you turn on his lap(careful you don’t want boner city..)

“Really?” You ask looking into his eyes, he nods, you quickly press your lips to his before pulling away, smiling widely.

You lean back in his lap after he asks you to court him , in which you agreed , he braids your hair before Bilbo opens the door. He gasps, at your position.

You get up Thorin, pulling him up,

“Oh shit sorry if I got blood on you Thorin.”

“You didn’t.”

“Oh hello dildo Gaggins.”

[gffa]

Tagged by @generallkenobi Rules: name ten favorite characters from ten things, then tag ten people. 1. Star Wars - Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker - mmffffmmmfffff, no, you can’t make me choose!  I know it seems like I’m probably a bigger fan of Obi-Wan’s, but honestly as much time as I spend thinking about and yelling about Anakin Skywalker, I’m pretty sure they’re tied.  I LOVE THEM SO MUCH, sobs.  I love Obi-Wan because he’s what I aspire to be, someone who is reserved but shows a depth of feeling at the same time, who has his shit together even when the worst happens, he still finds a way to keep getting back up, and still is kind to the galaxy, finds the good in people. Meanwhile, Anakin Skywalker is someone I see so much of myself in, all that messy noise in my head, the anxiety and depression that I read into his character, the fear of rejection that I’ve experienced on a bone-deep level, the disastrous choices he makes are ones that I feel come from a place where I understand what led him to them, and the fear of how hard it is to look within myself and really face myself, that I avoided it for a lot of years because it was too terrifying.  I trash talk him a lot and I yell about the shitty choices he made, but it’s never without the understanding that I feel I understand why he made them and why they resonate so powerfully with me. 2. Sailor Moon - Tsukino Usagi - My forever girl!  Usagi’s journey, especially in the manga, as someone who was emotionally fragile and would rather die than live without her special people, to someone who stands up and says, no, this time I’ll be the one to save them!  That her journey being told, from that fragile person to that strong person, was worth the telling, that her starting point was worthwhile, not something to be derided, that the journey itself, the back and forth progress of it, that it wasn’t just a straight line, is one that has incredible meaning to me, as someone who has struggled with similar things. 3.  Tolkien’s Legendarium - Thranduil - I was totally won over by Lee Pace’s portrayal in the movies, despite my frustration with the way he was written.  Part of it is that I’ve always loved the Elves (let me yell about how much I love Thingol, it’s ridiculous) and I love the connections he has to my favorite groups (I love the Sindarin Elves so muuuuuuch, I cry, even as I love the Noldor and Vanyar, too, like, I will fight a man for Finrod, okay, oh, and Fingolfin deserves the world!! and my problematic fave Maedhros ;__;) and I love his relationship with Legolas (or the potential of it that fandom runs with much better than the movies did), but mostly it’s that he’s a king who loves his people and chose them and they loved him in return for it. 4. Bleach - Inoue Orihime - I have a weakness for characters who doubt themselves, but find a core of strength in being kind and loving.  That Orihime has this tremendous power, that she could have been the most OP of the entire cast, but thoroughly rejected the idea of using it for violence, and instead only for healing, for kindness, cemented her as one of my forever loves.  She can be so silly and loopy and ridiculous, she can be “weak” in the way she cries and reaches out for people, she has trouble letting other people see the truth of her sometimes, but when it counted, she refused to break and instead chose to be kind.  I love her so very much. 5. Marvel - Thor - Thor is one of my favorites because the galaxy dumped a whole lot of shit on him and he refused to let it make him be less than he was.  Well, at least until Endgame, but we don’t talk about that movie.  (And even then it wasn’t that he stumbled, it was how they treated his depression, as one long joke, that makes me RRrrhhhaaggghh about it.)  He grieved for everything he lost, including his brother, but he also refused to let Loki walk all over him, that he missed his brother, wished he could trust him, but wouldn’t let Loki’s pain rewrite what actually happened.  The conversation on the skiff in Svartalfheim alone is why The Dark World is a movie I will always defend, “Who put me there [in the cell]!?”  "You damn well know who!”  YOU TELL HIM, THOR.  That care + refusing to be budged on what was right, yes, that’s my guy right there. 6. Gravitation - Yuki Eiri - As dumb as this show was (and the manga even more so, but I enjoy the show more), as much as it was a silly BL show, I loved this character for being there for me when I needed him.  Someone who had all this anger and hurt inside him, this depression that constantly ate at him, that he pushed people away because he couldn’t stand to let go of it, and it didn’t matter that there were people who loved him who wanted to help him, that a simple hug didn’t fix him, that it could help, but it couldn’t make him magically better--that was something I really needed when I watched the show.  That depression and the rage it could cause wasn’t something a hug could fix.  That he had to be willing to start opening up to people again, to risking more hurt, and that it wouldn’t be easy--I really, really needed that message at the time I got it, and I will always be thankful to that dumb show for giving it to me. 7. Steven Universe - Pink Diamond - Did you know that one of my favorite things in the world is hot mess lady characters?  I love them sooooooo much, like, you give me a lady who did questionable things but we’re still meant to find her sympathetic and her story worth telling?  I AM THERE.  And Pink just slammed her way into my heart with everything she’d faced, the terrible things the other Diamonds put her through, that she had to change on her own, that she never had a Steven there to help her, she had to realize everything by herself, and that she wasn’t perfect at it, that she hurt people in the way she stumbled forward, yet there was a person there who loved and cared deeply?  I love her forever. 8. Adventure Time - Princess Bubblegum - Nerdy science princess who is the sole possessor of a single braincell on the show and yet is just as batshit as the rest of them?  The one character who looked at all the wild shit that happened in Ooo and said, sometimes you gotta prepare for the worst or do things that aren’t nice because otherwise we’ll all die?  But never stopped caring about her people or the rest of the world and listened to others and tried her best to help?  And had this complicated, fraught relationship with Marceline which is one of the best “f/f doesn’t always have to be nice” relationships that I’ve gotten to consume?  I LOVE HERRRRR. 9. Mo Dao Zu Shi/The Untamed - Lan Wangji - I am weak to his character type, okay!  Reserved, talented, driven up the wall by the genius brat that bugs the shit out of him but also he loves them the most in the world, and utterly devoted to them?  YEAH THAT SOUNDS LIKE MY TYPE.  Also, Wang Yibo is so good-looking in the drama, oh my god. 10. Fruits Basket - Honda Tohru - Another character who refused to let the crap piled on her make her any less kind to the world.  She goes through so much and yet never stops loving people and finding sympathy for them, she never stops reaching out her hand.  While she’s never expected to do this, she’s never obligated to do so, there are plenty of characters in the series that are understandably angry and closed off that aren’t judged for being that way, that Tohru chooses to be open and loving, no matter how much she’s hurt for it, is a wonderful counterbalance.  And I am forever grateful that she got the family she wanted, she got the guy she wanted to fall in love with, she got to meet all these people she cared about and they cared about her in return, and she was stronger in her love than any of them were in their fear, anger, or hate.  I LOVE HER FOREVER. Tagging:  DON’T MAKE ME CHOOSE sobs

[soyeahitsmiddleearth]

Return Her pt. 3

The Company (and friends) x Reader

Bard the Bowman is quite accommodating (and cute too), but how will the others feel about you clicking so easily with him?

No amount of words or hyperbolic phrase can express the joy you feel when you see Bilbo coming in clutch with a ring of keys and a big smile on his face. 

First he releases Thorin, and then you.

When he sees your disheveled appearance and swollen face he falters and looks as if he wants to say something. Bilbo says nothing, but his eyes linger on you as he goes to free some of the others.

Thorin immediately approaches you to you while Bilbo frees everyone else, his hand reaching up to lightly press against your warm cheek. “I told you Master Baggins would have a plan." 

You nod your head once, a smile brightening your features, "You did, and you were right.”

Once everyone is freed from their confines Bilbo ushers you all down to some sort of cellar, kitchen thing.

The first thing you notice are the unconscious guards - passed out drunk - behind the large shelf the hobbit snuck you behind. In front of you all is a huge pyramid of barrels and you can’t help but to stare at it with confusion.

The others speak in hushed whispers when Bilbo tells everyone to get into the barrels, and though a bunch of them protest Thorin shuts it down and tells them to just trust him.

Everyone files into a barrel each, and while you have to bend your legs awkwardly in order to fit into your own, you end up fitting rather well.

Bilbo stands a few paces in front of everyone and you find yourself wondering what he’s going to do next.

Suddenly there is shouting that comes from somewhere else and the guards start to stir, and right away Bilbo rushes over to a lever just out of the way and pulls it.

The next thing you know, your stomach drops and the barrels drop into a large body of running water.

Your head goes under and you breathe in the water unintentionally, panicking internally before your head resurfaces.

When you break the surface of the water you gasp loudly, pressing your hand to your chest as you hack and cough up the water you accidentally choked down.

You don’t have much time to recover before your barrel begins to drift away, like everyone else’s.

There’s a splash from behind you, and when you look back you see that Bilbo has jumped in.

He flails and grabs at air, trying to find something - anything - to hold onto.

You lean over the side of your transportation and grab for him, getting a hold of his hands and hauling him closer so to try and pull him up. “C-Climb in!” You cry.

Your efforts to hoist him up don’t do you any good, though, because he can’t get enough momentum to pull himself in nor do you have the upper body strength to lift him.

When you realize that you cannot keep ahold of him anymore you pass Bilbo along to a dwarf much stronger than you so he won’t drown, and the relief is instant. 

A lot happens between escaping and getting in the water, and when the Orcs try to kill all of you because they decided now was a great time to show up, you found hopelessness seeping into you.

Even worse? The water gates are closed and now you’re all stuck, barrels bumping into each other as Thorin yells his internal distress.

Kili decides to play hero and jumps out of his barrel, running up to pull the lever while also fighting orcs on his way, when suddenly an arrow shoots through the air.

At first it seems like Kili doesn’t realize what happened, but then he collapses with a cry.

“Kili!” Fili yells in anguish.

You begin to try and get out of your barrel, yelling his name as well, when an orc gains on him with it’s weapon raised. Another arrow splits through the air and this time it’s from an ally, for it kills the orc and Kili is out of harms way.

Your gaze snaps to the source of the projectile and see the red-headed elf Tauriel. 

As soon as you see her you whoop and pump your fist in the air, “Yes!" 

Her gaze slides over you and an expression akin to relief passes over her countenance, but you don’t get long to think on it for abruptly the gates open and everyone starts to flow out of the underpass.

Kili flops over the side and lands into his barrel, a gross snap resounding as the end of the arrow breaks off and flies in some random direction.

The expression on his face is pained, but when you try to inquire on if he’s okay the roaring of the water drowns you out.

Things move very quickly after that.

You grip onto your barrel for dear life as you fall down a short waterfall, head going under again, and when you resurface you splutter and cough loudly, your eyes and throat beginning to burn.

You’re vaguely aware of Orcs being killed around you and the elves chasing after the foul beasts, but you’re too dazed from the fast pace of things to properly process anything.

When an arrow pierces just under your hand, though, you sober up.

Since there isn’t any way that you can help anyone against the Orcs attacking you all, you begin to try and steer your barrel as it swerves left and right so they don’t have to worry about your safety.

The elves kill the orcs along the way and, probably unintentionally, keep you all safe. The blond-elf Legolas, who separated you from everyone at the beginning, gets saved by Thorin while he’s distracted with some other orcs.

You would’ve liked to see how the rest of it plays out, but one of the beasts jumps onto your barrel and swings it’s long sword seemingly out of nowhere; and to avoid losing your head, you duck down further into your barrel.

You vaguely make out the sound of someone calling your name, but the rushing water is so loud you can’t decipher who it is nor how close they are.

Something whips through the air as it tries to stab into you, and  when you look up there’s an arrow sticking in its head.

It falls back and when you poke your head back up you see Tauriel looking at you with her bow still drawn. 

You cup your hands over your mouth and yell, "Thanks, hot-stuff!” And then go back your barrel steering.

—

Many different things transpire after all the excitement.

For example Kili had to be tended to, Thorin started to be pushy and complain about losing time, oh and a bargeman is now smuggling you all on his boat for gold after threatening to kill Ori.

Everyone is now huddled together at the front of said bargeman’s boat, and after Oin took a look at the bruises so unfairly inflicted upon your arms and face he leaves you to your own devices at the back of the ship with the bargeman you now know as Bard.

They are all discussing the payment they owe, but since you have nothing to offer up (other than yourself which, I mean hey this guy is pretty good looking) you stay out of it. 

Bard looks on ahead at the waters to avoid killing you all in a crash, though his gaze flickers down to you ever so often with curiosity sparkling in his lovely greys *I have no freaking clue what color his eyes are*.

He then speaks softly, “This companionship you have with the dwarves… is it mutual?”

It takes you a moment to figure out what he’s implying before you realize how this all must look. A battered human girl quietly tagging along with a group of male dwarves, disheveled, bruised, and being timidly quiet away from the others curled up on yourself (for warmth, but he doesn’t know that).

Your face heats up and you nod your head frantically, “A-Ah, no… Er, yes. It’s mutual. I’m fine. They’re my friends, I just… ah, ran into trouble with the elves is all…”

His eyes look out over the water again and he nods his head, “I don’t doubt their honor, I am only making sure… But I never knew elves to be violent like that.” He looks at you again and you can see that he doesn’t completely believe your words.

“I know… The elf king, Thranduil I think, wanted me to tell him something but I didn’t wanna. I guess he’s just not used to someone telling him to screw off.” You smile cheekily (ignoring the throbbing that takes place when you do), and Bard seems taken aback before a smile of his own works its way to his face.

“I suppose,” he pauses for a moment, then muses, “The way you speak is odd. I’ve never heard someone quite like you before.”

Ah shoot, you forgot that you’re supposed to be blending in better. 

“Oh… yes. Um, I come from a place where.. speech patterns are much different. You see-” You’re cut off by one of the dwarves calling your name.

You sigh dramatically and stand, offering the bargeman a kind smile, “Forgive me. I have to see what those brats want.” Without further chit chat you turn and approach them, hands on your hips while you look down at them expectantly.

“What is it?”

They all stare at you for a few moments before Thorin speaks, “Why do you talk to him so? You’re not giving anything away now, are you?”

You just stare at him quietly with annoyance clear on your face. Like, did he really just ask that? After getting hit around and stuff for them you’d think he’d trust you a bit more.

“Of course not! After taking all of this”, you gesture to your face and arms, “to stay silent from that elf guy, for you, do you really think I’d go blabbing off to some man we all just met?” That sure silences them. 

“Maybe you shouldn’t talk to him so much. We don’t know him.” Dwalin grunts out earning an eye roll from you.

“I’ll talk to whoever I want thank you very much. I don’t need permission from any of you, I’m a big girl and a big girl can have friends.”

“Male friends?” This time it’s Fili, and you sigh loudly.

“Oh, you too? You’re all men! And you’re the only friends I have. How must that look?” Everyone goes quiet again, and this time you smile triumphantly. “That’s what I thought. Now… Bard, our host, is awfully lonely over there and I’m going to speak to him again- and you won’t say a word about it.” And you leave before anyone can say anything else. 

Dwalin grumbles something under his breath, and Thorin simply rolls his eyes while Fili mumbles his discontent to his agreeing brother. Even Bofur, Nori, and Dori are sneaking glances over at the two of you conversing every so often. 

It’s safe to say that they are rather jealous. 

[evilwriter37]

Cold and Careless

Bard found Thranduil in one of Dale’s many ruined squares, standing alone amongst the dead. The air reeked of death and the steel-sharp scent of blood. He was glad he’d found the elf king alone. He was angry, and didn’t want to make a scene in front of anyone. 

“I thought we were allies,” Bard said, voice rough with emotion. It had been a very long day, and it was wearing on him. The sun was bloodying the sky as it went under the horizon. 

“Excuse me?” Thranduil asked, turning around. He appeared to be startled, which was odd for an elf. He’d probably been deep in thought.

“You were going to leave,” Bard accused. “You knew a second army was coming, and you were going to leave.”

Thranduil shook his head, began walking towards Bard. “We were allies against Thorin, not the orcs.” He went past Bard, clearly not wanting to talk with him. Bard turned, grabbed him by the arm. Thranduil glared at his hand, then him, very clearly offended by his touch. 

“You told me we were allies before all this started,” Bard said. “You said you would stand by me. No matter what. Was that a lie?”

Thranduil pulled his arm away, turned fully to Bard. They were close, the air between them crackling with tension. 

“A leader cannot always honor their word, something you will have to learn,” Thranduil hissed.

Bard barked out a cynical laugh. “I am no king, Thranduil.”

“That is not what your people think.”

“And yet you were going to leave us. You have no care, do you? You are cold and lacking in feeling. You would have condemned us to death. Are we meaningless to you because we are mortal?”

“That’s not-”

“You think your life above ours,” Bard said angrily, realizing how Thranduil thought. “You don’t care.”

Thranduil drew away from him, looking away. “I do,” he said quietly. He sighed. “May I tell you something, Bard?”

Bard was surprised by this vulnerable-sounding and looking Thranduil. He’d only known him for a day or so, but he’d never seen him like this before. He’d seemed like he thought himself above vulnerability. 

Thranduil met Bard’s gaze, and Bard was caught by the pain in that blue gaze.

“I was married once,” Thranduil told him. “She was beautiful, wonderful, but it didn’t last. It couldn’t in this horrible world.”

Bard swallowed hard. He was very familiar with this, with loving someone and losing them. His own wife had died of illness years ago.

“She died,” Thranduil went on. “A horrible death at the hands and blades of orcs.” His voice was wavering, and Bard realized he had never really heard real emotion such as this in his voice before. “Ever since, caring has been… difficult. I’ve hidden the ability to care, deep down inside, to avoid being hurt again. And…” He drew in a deep breath. “I was leaving because I did not want to find your body among the dead. I do not think I would have been able to handle it.”

Bard blinked in shock, surprised by these words. Was… was Thranduil saying he cared about him?

“Thranduil-”

Thranduil suddenly grabbed him by the back of the head, pulled him close. There was a brief moment of hesitation, of eyes meeting, of panting breath, before their lips met. Bard had not kissed anyone since his wife, and he had not imagined himself kissing a man, and an elf king no less, but he found that he liked it, that it was fiery, passionate, nothing like the cold, emotionless way that Thranduil presented himself. 

They pulled away, meeting each other’s eyes, breath trembling between each other. 

“You do care,” Bard breathed.

“I do,” Thranduil confirmed.