#which we don't seem to see him do with a lot of people

[buddiebeginz]

Saw this had to share with you… Exactly what I thought during the medal ceremony.

Thanks for sending this my way. Great tweet.

You have to remember that pretty much everything is done with intention on a tv show especially when it's a shortened season like this. If B/T were really important to Tim and he was trying to get the audience really on board with them not to mention set things up for next season I think he'd have done a lot more with them.

He wouldn't have even needed to use up a lot of extra time to do it either. He could done things like have Buck and T*mmy in background scenes together where they're leaning in close to talk to one another. Or have them making comments to one another or others that connect them. Like when Buck was watching Chris he could have had Buck sending a text to T*mmy or have Eddie ask Buck something about T*mmy just anything so Buck talks about him.

Also at the award ceremony we could have had a scene where it panned to T*mmy when Buck got his award and instead it panned to Eddie. We also had T*mmy being kind of a downer (again) when Buck was talking to him after they received their awards instead of them having cute banter or planning a date or anything.

I have to wonder what the general audience thinks about B/T vs Buddie because it's not B/T we're seeing having these long emotional talks or cutsey flirty moments it's Buddie. The last time we even saw B/T doing anything coupley was when they kissed in 7x06 but earlier in the same ep at the bachelor party T*mmy was also kind of a dick. They had their coffee date in 7x05 which you could say was flirty with the hand holding but before that was the disaster date. And 7x04 was mostly about Buddie. Even with the kiss scene Buck talks about Eddie before and after. I just don't see where people are seeing this this amazing couple with this great storyline in B/T because it's not what is actually on screen.

I just feel like everything we've seen thus far is telling us that B/T are not on the same page. That while they might have some chemistry physically they don't when it comes to a full fledged romantic relationship. If Tim wanted us to be invested in this ship and by the s7 finale for the audience to see how much B/T's relationships has grown we would see that by now and we haven't.

Even in the scene where Buck talks about T*mmy to Bobby Buck isn't the one who brings him up it's Bobby. I also think we're seeing some signs that Buck might not be too certain about whatever is going on with him and T*mmy because he seemed to be looking for some kind reasurrence about it from Bobby.

I think even if B/T make it into s8 T*mmy will continue to be a placeholder until Buddie happens. Tbh I don't see that being a long term ship for Buck at all even if Eddie never comes out (though I think he will). Oliver and Lou just don't have that kind of chemistry (as was more than apparent in that interview) and I think that might also play a factor in why we haven't seen them together more this season.

[creauchiergh]

guys, guys, guys. jax isn't an npc; he's a game dev/mod who got trapped in the circus.

i'm sure someone has already put forth this theory, but with the series still being in its early stages, it's hard to say exactly which direction it's going. while i don't think the npc theory is bad, i think it lacks a foundation and is more so the fandom's attempt to justify jax's moral greyness or give him depth where there currently isn't any. i just wanted to share some of my own thoughts about what his deal might be.

firstly, his design, which is honestly just my own speculation but bear with me. i know goose made some jokes about his clothes being farmer's overalls, but when i look at him, i almost get mechanic vibes? like if he wasn't such a prick, he'd be in charge of fixing any bugs that crop up during the adventures, which is pretty much what a moderator does.

speaking of which, he has keys to all the rooms, which is already pretty sketchy in itself, but it makes sense if you consider that he helped make the circus. naturally, he'd have them on hand in case he needed to access any areas of potential danger. to me, it's a bit like having cheat codes, which definitely gives him an upper hand above the other circus members. (but again, it's not like he's ever going to do his job.)

there's also the "figurine thing," which is probably either a throwaway joke or a thinly-veiled attempt at foreshadowing the npcs-- since their models resemble figurines-- but it's still worth noting. if we assume that the "figurine thing" is referring to the npcs-- which it probably isn't, but again, bear with me-- then it shows just how much jax knows about the circus. as far as i remember, none of the other characters have ever brought up the outside of the map, but obviously, if jax made the game, he's going to know its layouts and inner workings like the back of his hand. i won't go so far as to say he's all-knowing, but i'm sure he knows a lot more than he lets on, and i have a feeling we're going to see that in later episodes.

if he really can predict caine's adventures and whatnot, since he designed them, it explains why he's so unfazed by everything that happens at the circus, from zooble getting taken by the gloinks to running into the gloink queen. the only time he really seems to be surprised is when the game glitches-- when the one gloink started bugging out, when kaufmo abstracted, etc.

i think the mod theory explains jax's personality and motivations. when he first arrived at the circus, there might've been a time when he acted more responsibly, fixing all the bugs, trying to stop the abstractions, etc. he could've been caine's right-hand at keeping everything under control. but maybe he slowly gave up these responsibilities when he realized that people were going to get abstracted no matter what, as we can see from the crossed-off doors in the pilot. it's very possible that he became consumed by his mod privileges when he began acting more recklessly and faced zero repercussions for his actions. essentially, he's a step above everyone else in terms of knowledge, awareness, and grants of power-- probably just below caine on the power ladder, though pomni could also rival him as she comes to learn more about the circus. depending on how jax uses his abilities, he could either help everyone find the exit or slowly lead them towards abstraction, and given what goose has said about the future of the series, it's not looking very optimistic for anyone involved.

but what do i know? this theory could be completely nonsensical and riddled with plot holes. i just like to hyperanalyze jokes 🥲

[englishstrawbie]

Station 19 7x09

Now that was one hell of an episode! Forgive me, this might get long.

Carina DeLuca, I was a little mad that you tried to ruin another sexy moment with baby talk but then you did that little lick before you kissed Maya's abs, so all is forgiven. 🔥 Also Carina describing Maya as her "hot, hot, hot wife" when the episode gave us that ending felt intentional and mean.

The mutual "I love you", the nose rub, the kiss... I love these sweet moments between them. And then there was the "I'll see you at home", which said just as much, like they were willing it to be true because they both know that the wildfires are going to be a hard fight. Especially after Carina had just been treating a patient whose husband was lost in the woods.

"What if this is it? What if I never see him again?" ... we all know where Carina's mind went at that moment.

"I'm sure he's doing whatever he can to find his way back to you" ... oh, I hope she hangs on to these words when she finds out about Maya. (Assuming she does...? It seems to me like they need to get Maya out of that fire pretty damn quick, before Carina even has chance to find out.)

"Monogamy is for the weak" ... "Or the very very dedicated, that's what I said - and that's who I am now" ... THANK YOU for remembering the whole line. It drives me crazy when people only quote the first part, when the second part of it says a whole lot more about who Maya was then and who she is now. That said, I have mixed feelings about the idea of her offering to get pregnant if Carina can't - because the whole point of pushing the IVF at the same time as adopting Liam is because it's Carina's dream to carry a child and experience childbirth. Still, it says a lot about how much she's changed that she's even willing to think about doing it.

THE ENDING. I expect it's been said enough already but HOLY SH*T. What a way to end the episode, to set up Carina for joy and heartbreak at the same time. Stefania's acting was on point in that moment, the little "no" of disbelief when Helm told her she was pregnant and her "why, do you think it's Maya's?" joke. Contrasted against Maya's absolute panic as the flames surrounded her (even if the special effects of the fire were a little distracting). I don't actually believe it will end in heartbreak, I very much believe that Maya and Carina will get their happy ever after with lots of babies. If anything, I suspect we may see Maya question her job with the fire service again as it feels like it's been leading to that - and I'm still not keen on that idea, but (as someone else pointed out to me) if that's her decision, at least she makes it on her own terms.

Although, at this rate, Andy is going to be left with a team at 19 made up of her ex-husband and Beckett. 👀

I loved all the Maya and Andy scenes we got, I'm glad their friendship has been more prominent this season. I love hearing them both say how proud they are of each other.

Maya Kathleen? Didn't they mean Maya Katherine, after her mom?

All the throwbacks to previous episodes and scenes were great and I hope that continues into the next episode. Dibs on the puppy. Hughie. The five OGs on top of the fire truck was such a wonderful scene, watching them all get into the same position as the last time we saw them there. It made me sad that Dean and Jack weren't there.

"We're 19 - family forever" ... ❤️❤️

I hope Theo getting hurt doesn't interfere with Vic's plans to move to DC with Crisis One. It's where she belongs. I love the idea of Travis going with her, although he has good chemistry with the new guy whose name I don't remember.

This was an A+ episode for me and I really really hope next week's finale lives up to the same hype.

[fixingoff]

tuna kimchi gimbap - (ldh)

투나 김치 김팦 = tuna kimchi gimbap

having an estimated 45,000KRW in your checking account has you feeling down. was it a good idea to spend the last of your money buying food? answers point to no, but at least you got to embarrass yourself in front of the cute cashier.

or in which you meet lee haechan at 4am in a convenience store after crying with your best friend over your bank account's balance.

note: ive been seeing a lot of 'cwm to 7/11 in south korea' videos and this came to me. this hits a bit close to home since ive been stressed about money myself and impulsively bought food *cries* plus, i love worker!haechan for some reason

contains under cut

contains | convenience store!haechan, best friend&roommate!doyoung, mentions of crying, overworked and stressed reader&doyoung, foreigner!reader, reader is a teacher who teaches people english, dancer!doyoung, one shot so it's rushed

wc 3.2k

your eyes were puffy, your hands were sweaty, and your hair was tangled to the point where it hurt to run your fingers through it. you noticed doyoung was in the same state, except he looked worse. his eyeliner and mascara was everywhere but where it was supposed to be, his lips were chapped from biting it, and his eyes seemed to start swelling from crying.

the both of you cried yourselves to sleep around midnight, and you both woke up at almost four in the morning. the stress and monotny of your jobs has finally taken its toll once you both added how much money you each had combined, and it wasn't even enough to fill up your gas tank. the tears and screams of frustration came, doyoung going as far as to gripping onto his hair so hard you had to forcefully pull his hands away. it wasn't as if you haven't seen doyoung stressed, but seeing him almost tear his hair out was new.

your situation wasn't any better. you came to south korea after being accepted for an english teaching program. coming in blindly to south korea was something you regret. the only thing you knew how to do was speak the language itself, and you thought that that was all you needed. nothing was wrong with the people you were teaching; if anything they were the only reason you haven't quit. the pay had you wanting to leave south korea altogether, as it wasn't even enough for a down payment on an apartment. you were lucky to meet doyoung, whose roommate just left him and he needed a new one badly.

doyoung was an up and coming dancer, so it wasn't surprising that his pay was just as bad as yours. having to split the rent 50-50 hurt your wallet and his severely, but it was better than being homeless. bonding with doyoung wasn't easy; your schedules rarely aligned, or you were both too frustrated to talk to each other. the only reason he became your best friend was because he came home one day and saw you crying while drinking some type of alcohol you don't remember the name of; you just grabbed it off the shelf. doyoung joined you, and for 3 hours you both ranted and cried over your jobs.

after that night, getting drunk and crying with doyoung became a regular thing, and tonight was no different. except you both didn't have beer in the house, and after checking each other's bank balance to see if you even had enough to buy some you came to the realization that you didn't. the tears came almost immediately, then the screams of frustration. finally came the good nap after a cry, and then came the regret of crying after waking up. but you and doyoung didn't care about that right now, as there was now a new problem...

you were both starving.

"maybe we can split it?" doyoung suggested as he stood up to walk to the kitchen to pour you both a glass of filtered water. "if we go to the convenience store down the road we'd spend about 15,000 won." he finished pouring the water into the glass and took a sip first before handing it to you.

the one thing you were craving was their tuna kimchi gimbap. you fell in love with it the very first time doyoung brought it home from that store specifically. something you forced yourself to do is to get used to eating the same thing almost every day, which is probably another reason you liked it so much. piles of wrappers of tuna kimchi gimbap lay in the trash can to the point where some neighbors called you 'gimbap' every once in a while. it was funny to you in the beginning, until you realized that you were known for basically eating.

you took a sip and sighed in content. "yeah maybe. just give me a minute, okay? i'd rather not go out looking like this." you joked, but obviously it wasn't a joke; everything about your look right now screamed disaster. doyoung nodded. "you're telling me. my makeup is everything but perfect right now." he joked as well, walking to the bathroom to either remove his makeup or redo it. you figured he would be taking it off, since it was 4am and you were both only going to the store.

you decided to take an impromptu shower after failing to ease the tangles from your hair. hearing doyoung's shower turn on as well made you chuckle, suspecting that he was probably too lazy to wipe off his makeup. plus, you were both sweaty after waking up from the nap and you'd rather not potentially look like a sweaty mess.

after showering and a good cry (you could even hear doyoung's sobs through the wall) you were both ready to go. you both stopped by an atm first and cashed out the amount that was agreed upon. seeing the fee made you wince; it wasn't a lot, but for someone in your financial state it broke your heart seeing that.

"god this atm sucks," you began, and doyoung nodded. "fees make me feel like someone is slapping me in the face." you grabbed the cash from the dispenser, holding onto doyoung's arm as you both walked down the steep road to the store. holding onto doyoung wasn't rare for you to do, and neither were the dating assumptions. not once did you see your best friend and roommate as a potential boyfriend, but no one believed you. a simple solution would've been to just stopped holding onto him, but there was something about doyoung that comforted you. maybe it was because he was the first friend you made when you moved here.

the automatic doors slid open, and the bright lights made you both wince and squint. "okay, i suppose our limit is about 7000 won. let's try not to go over that." doyoung commented as you agreed with a nod. and with that, you both spread out to look for what you both wanted to eat and that was in your budget.

your mind was on the gimbap. you knew what aisle to go to, and what direction to take to get to it as soon as possible. what you weren't expecting however, was an employee stocking the gimbap rather slowly, and your patience was wearing thin. the only reason you didn't walk away and look for something else to eat was because, based on his side profile, he was rather attractive. his hair was brown, and his bangs were just barely covering his eyes. the next thing you noticed were his hands as well as his slender fingers; you weren't attracted to hands, and you never have been. but if you were, his would be your favorite.

you weren't sure how long you were staring, but it was long enough for him to finish stocking the gimbap. he noticed that you were looking rather intensely, and it caught him off guard. "apologies, did you need help looking for something? or was there something here that you were waiting for?" his voice was mixed with confusion and worry. after all, there was someone who had been staring at him for who knows how long.

he couldn't help but feel his cheeks turn red from being nervous over the fact that he was watched at, and yours also turned red from embarrassment. "yes, i was hoping to get that right there?" you pointed to the gimbap as your feet began shuffling towards the thing you've been craving so bad. "i didn't mean to stare, really. i was just waiting for you to be finished."

once you finished that sentence you felt like running away from him. you began wondering if you sounded like a condescending customer who was calling him slow, and if you were someone that he was trying to blow up with his mind. working in retail isn't foreign to you, and you've had your share of rude customers. although teaching isn't a good career path for you, it is ten times better than dealing with people who think they're better than you just because they aren't in your position.

"oh! yes i'm sorry. really sorry. please, take whatever you'd like." his voice seemed to get higher in pitch when he spoke, probably out of embarrassment. he stepped aside as you inched closer to him (well, you were inching closer to the food, and he just so happened to be there). you felt a bit intimidated by him, and not just because of his beauty. through your peripherals you could see that his eyes were on you and he seemed to be playing with the empty box in his hands. you chalked it up to the fact that he was probably watching you subconsciously, or maybe he wasn't done restocking and was just waiting for you to leave.

you could hear his fingers tapping on the box, and it somewhat eased your mind racing with thoughts of self-consciousness. "do you need me to hold that up for you at the register? i'm on my way back there." he suggested, and you thought about declining his offer for a second as you were only getting a drink after grabbing the gimbap. though, you assumed that maybe you could get a conversation out of him and if you were bold enough, you could get his phone number.

"that would be nice," you answered, your smile small as you handed him the single piece of food in your hand. your fingers brushed against each other, and you were once again turning red. "you're a good worker for offering... haechan. especially with it being 4 in the morning and all." you pronounced the name on his shirt rather slowly, and he released a breathy laugh afterwards.

haechan's box was quickly forgotten, as it now on the floor while he held your food with both hands even though he didn't need to. "well the copious amounts of coffee help. but if i'm being honest, i might crash out as soon as i get to my place. coffee can only do so much for a person like me." his voice seemed to be high pitched once more, which you couldn't help but find a bit cute. you kept staring at the name tag on his shirt, doing your best to memorize all the consonants and vowels. your mind was definitely not there with you, otherwise you would've been able to pronounce it with ease. plus, you've never heard of a name like his.

"we aren't very similar in that category, are we? coffee makes me sleepy." you joked, remembering the time you drank coffee after pulling an all-nighter from grading your students' papers. your efforts were futile though, as you collapsed into a deep sleep in the teacher's lounge as your students went to lunch. "maybe you just aren't drinking the right type of coffee. if you want, i can recommend text you some recommendations. or better yet i can take you out for coffee one day? promise i won't bring you here." haechan suggested, and you were caught off guard by how quick and smooth he was with whatever it was that he was doing.

to be honest, you didn't really enjoy coffee. iced, decaf, some other third thing; you just couldn't get into it. but for haechan? you'd force the coffee down your throat if you had to. though you were already planning on ordering something other than coffee and just taking sips of his drink. even though it was probably a bit invasive for a 'first date', hopefully he wouldn't mind.

"well as long as it isn't from here i can't possibly refuse." you said, and he gave you a warm smile. his nose crinkled a bit from smiling, as did yours. haechan's hands reached for his pocket, presumably to pull out a pen or notepad, until you both heard a voice from beside each other.

"you ready to go?" doyoung's voice seemed to echo, and you mentally punched yourself in the face. everyone assumed that he was your boyfriend, and you didn't mind; in fact you were used to it. however, for haechan to be under the impression that doyoung was your boyfriend and you were making plans to go on a date behind his back? well you just couldn't have that.

haechan cleared his throat, and you saw his hand retract from his pocket. "i will have this waiting for you up front. please take your time and enjoy the rest of your shopping." he bowed his head as he spoke in a more formal and serious tone than before, and with that he walked away. you knew it wasn't doyoung's fault, after all it wasn't like you came here with the goal to get a date from one of the workers. but you were mentally cursing out your best friend for having terrible timing.

doyoung watched as he walked away and then looked back at you. "what was that about?" his tone of voice was a mix of curiosity and seriousness, as he assumed that haechan was giving you a hard time or just being a creep. "what did he say to you?" the assumption made you sigh. you couldn't even be mad at him after you discovered that he was just playing into the role of being an overprotective best friend, even if some part of you was still annoyed.

"i was this close," you pinched your fingers together as you spoke. "this close to getting a date with him. now he thinks that you're my boyfriend, and had intentions to cheat on you." you sounded defeated as you walked over to the drinks section of the store. the interaction made you lose your appetite just a bit, and you even debated on just going to another store so you don't have to face haechan out of embarrassment. it was possible to redeem yourself, but you were almost positive that he wouldn't believe you once he saw doyoung again.

doyoung walked behind you, wincing in response. "just go up there and explain it to him. he seems like an... understandable person." his voice seemed to slow down at the end, his attention now on haechan who was standing at the counter perfectly parallel to where you were both at. you turned to look in the direction doyoung was staring at, and there you saw haechan. his eyes were wide, eye bags visible, and you could see his eyes watering a bit. upon making eye contact with you, he quickly looked away. "jesus, if you don't go out with him i will. he looks so sad."

the walk to the register was dreadful, as you were debating if whether or not you should redeem yourself by explaining to haechan that your best friend was just that- your best friend. you didn't want to lose a chance to go out with him over an assumption he made, so you began to mentally prepare a speech to give to him once the opportunity arose. doyoung did his best to help you, even going as far as to standing further away from you as haechan rung everything up. you both spent a total of 30 minutes in the store, and the sleepiness was getting to you both.

"your total is 9800 won. will you be paying with cash or card?" haechan's voice was a bit shaky, as if he was trying not to cry. or perhaps he was just nervous. "cash." you responded, handing him the cash that belonged to you and doyoung. the total was more than you expected, but after seeing the pile of snacks brought by doyoung it made sense.

haechan took out the change as you stood there, as you took in a deep breath before speaking. "we're not dating," you began, and haechan stopped counting to look up at you, while doyoung began to fall asleep while standing up. "this is my best friend slash roommate. i don't want you to think we're a couple, because we're not. his timing was terrible, and i really wanted to go out with you. hopefully i still can?" your words seemed to run into each other, and it didn't go unnoticed by haechan as he laughed in response to your rambling.

"well that definitely... clears things up." haechan began, as he felt some sort of weight lift off of his shoulders at your 'explanation'. doyoung stood next to you sound asleep. "are you still up for coffee then? i get off in about an hour, hopefully you're still awake by then." he joked, his eyes shifting towards your best friend. "or maybe we can just take a nap and get coffee afterwards. whatever you want to do, i'm down for that." haechan suggested, handing you your change then quickly beginning to bag your food.

doyoung's breath was getting heavier, which was a sign that he was going to begin snoring soon. when haechan looked away you pushed doyoung lightly to wake him up, and he jolted awake. "are we done? can we go now?" he asked, and you couldn't help but laugh at him.

"almost. just give me a minute okay? you can go wash your face if you want. i don't want to have to carry you home." you said to him, and with that he walked away to what you assumed to be the restroom to wake himself up until you both got home. then you turned to haechan. "let's see if i'm awake by the time you get out. i just woke up from a nap but it is a bit late." you heard the humming of the machine as the receipt printed, and you watched as haechan grabbed it. his hand reached into his pocket yet again and this time he managed to pull out a pen.

"call me if you need help staying awake," he joked as he handed you your receipt, and you immediately looked at the back of it to see what he had written. after confirming it was his phone number, you smiled at him. "of course we don't have to go out immediately, but i would like it if we did go out eventually." his voice seemed rather desperate, and if it had been anyone else who said that you would've cringed and threw their phone number away in the trash can where they could see it happen. but it was haechan, and you liked haechan.

"expect a call from me in 20 minutes then... haechan." the struggle to say his name was unfortunately still there, and you cringed at your slow pronunciation to properly say his name. his smile was wide now, and his face seemed to become red once again. you both suspected that you would be asleep if you didn't call him as soon as you got home, and you honestly didn't want to fall asleep. you knew that you were doing a bit too much for someone you haven't even gone out with yet. but some part of you felt glad that you were comfortable enough to not feel embarrassed over staying up for him.

you gave him a smile before stepping out, and you waited outside doyoung as you were greeted with the humid night air. within seconds he walked out as well, his eye bags still rather visible, but he seemed to be awake enough to walk home. "did everything go well? he seemed happy. swear he looked like a kid in a candy store."

"shut up."

[mary-laib]

OKAY WRITING ABOUT JWCT SHIPS TIME:

Sammy x Yasmina

10/10

I love their relationship and how they have come so far throughout cc and ct. Also less to do with the ship but I especially loved how Yasmina was shown in ct to have worked towards facing her fears and has gotten so much further than Sammy, who has been ignoring her problems. There's like nothing to hate about this ship. Everyone agrees they're perfect.

Kenji x Brooklyn

3/10

I've been waiting for them to break up since they got together. She was great for him in the beginning of their relationship, helping him become his own person and becoming less egotistical, but she has refused to change with him, which has made their relationship stagnant. I thing their relationship was good for Kenji and I'm glad they got together if only so that she could help him figure out how to be his own man, but past that, their relationship was pointless and I hope it never gets rejuvenated.

Ben x Darius

8/10

I love them as bros and honestly, despite their obvious closeness and the fact that I would like to see more of their interactions, I see them as more platonic, especially with what Darius said about his crush on Brooklyn. Not because of him liking Brooklyn or girls in general and you'll see why in a minute. But I also wouldn't be mad to see them get together. They're both nerds and I love them.

Darius x Brooklyn

2/10

Honestly, I feel like the same things that caused a rift in Brooklyn's relationship with Kenji would also tear apart her relationship with Darius. And it's stated in the show that it's unrequited. They're good friends, but while he'd probably rate her as his top friend and vice versa, I feel like we can collectively agree that there are other friendships he has that are less toxic. Also the love triangle thing feels so weird when the girl cares less about both the guys combined than either one feels about her.

Darius x Nobody

9/10 The dots have been connected

Now hear me out: I don't feel like his crush has ruined things between him and Ben or Kenji, but some things about what he said regarding his crush and his reactions have made me feel like he is very aroace coded. Which has put a lot of things in perspective for me. Since the beginning of cc, he's been a "power of friendship" guy and rewatching his interactions with everyone, they seem a lot stronger and meaningful as just platonic, rather than romantic. And while everyone around him has been dealing with romance, he's just kind of indifferent to it all until Brooklyn. And his reaction to his crush on Brooklyn just screams repressed aroace with him saying that he never thought he could feel like that (has he never had a crush on anybody before) and how he has completely panicked regarding their relationship. Idk to me, it's giving aroace with a "fake" crush or demi aroace person who has taken way too long to fall for a girl that anybody else would have fallen for after the original bout of mortal danger. He had to be friends with her for YEARS before he could catch a semblance of a crush on her. And it also sounds to me like she was pretty absent in his life before popping in to stay with him for a week, which could also explain why he might he having a "fake" crush (if that is what it is). ALSO: when I say "fake" crush, I'm not trying to downplay his feelings, I'm just referring to something a lot of aroace people experience where you get really close to someone and mistake those feelings for love. And when it happens, these feelings are very intense(speaking from experience). Like how if he's suddenly frequently interacting with Brooklyn again and it's just them, I feel like that kind of situation could lead to an aroace crush. It's all just giving aroace person experiencing their first crush in the most traumatic way possible.

Brooklyn x Nobody

10/10 We love to see a gal feeling herself

I feel like at this point in the story, she has nothing to gain or give by being in a relationship with anybody in the show. Her and Kenji had a decent run while they had it, but it's time to let go at this point. If she does end up with someone, it has to be someone outside the main cast and personally, I'd like to see her with a gal pal. She has bi energy, especially with the new haircut.

Kenji x Darius

7/10

Honestly, I definitely shipped them mid-cc, but at the beginning of ct, I decided I did not want to see them get together. But by the end, I kind of changed my mind. I still think their relationship would be best platonic, but I also wouldn't be mad if they got together. It'd probably be a bit stranger than if Darius was with Ben, but they've also got a strong connection.

Ben x Kenji

0/10

I feel like they've hardly gotten any relationship building in either cc or ct and it needs to happen pronto. There has to be something they can bond over

Sammy x Yasmina and Ben

10/10

I'd like to see the lesbians in a qpr with their hypeman. Ben is just so cute with them and he loves them so much (platonically) and vice versa. It doesn't need to be anything official, but just more of Ben being their third wheel/adopted son would make the show more perfect than it already is.

Ben x His European GF

2/10

I think she's fake, either that he's lying about her so he doesn't lose street cred or that she is lying to him and is a catfish. Maybe we'll see a plot twist relating to the gf, but I'm not holding out hope. She could be redeemed if she was a real girl who was a total kickass and saved the whole group (maybe they meet her at the end of their stowaway boat mission) but otherwise I don't really care about her. Also don't lose hope, people who hc him as gay or aro, there's always the chance that he's bi, lying, or having a "fake" crush like Darius. I know I, as an aroace person have had more online than irl relationships and I'm p sure that's a sign of not being allo, especially when the person you're dating is far away and you have no plans of ever seeing them irl.

Anyways thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

[fruit-sy]

My personal thoughts on the major themes of Penacony 2.2

I was gonna make an entire Penacony retrospective and try to really dig into the whole story, but 1. I'm not that smart and 2. It has hours of footage and I don't think I'm strong enough to parse through that and form my own conclusions

so, just the things that really jumped at me and made me pause to think. I may do surface level research to make sure if a character really said this or that, but other than that, these are my thoughts fresh after finishing the quest.

Ok, to start off: Sunday and the road to hell

He's... god, he's such a complicated and interesting little man.

He is what I would call the embodiment of the saying "the road to hell is paved with good intentions". On the surface, he is trying to make a universe which is authoritarian-like. If you peel it back a bit more, he intends to make the universe a better place. But at the heart of it, I think he's just someone who is scared of pain.

There are 3 sequences I want to break down:

The Robin-Sunday exchanges before they meet Gopher Wood

This exchange has a lot of Sunday misdirecting Robin's points, but she calls out most of it.

Robin starts off with observing the dreamscape and concludes that dreamchasers shouldn't use penacony as a means of escaping entirely from reality. Because they won't overcome their demons. She asks if this can really count as "living"

Sunday at first seems to agree that things are not the way it should be. But there's a bit of misdirection on his part. He responded to robin's question by connecting "people using penacony as an escape" with (his opinion on) the way people currently "live" (which is what he was agreeing to in "things are not the way it should be"). He will then frame the narrative to show that people completely escaping through dreams is a good thing, and then will swerve to say how the "strong" should determine the future of the "weak".

Robin understandably does not agree with Sunday's narrative, because she believes that by staying in the dream (or MAKING dreamchasers stay in the dream), it will lock dreamchasers in stasis forever, making them unable to choose how to go about their future and overcome their difficulties. She then criticizes that no one has the right to determine whether a human deserves to live for a future or not.

There's a clear difference in ideology here. Sunday's devotion to Order is so strong because the experiences in his life had led him to believe that forcing his will on other people is the way to go. His ideology is rigid, cold, impersonal and is applied to all uniformly.

Robin firmly believes in choice and refuses to let an authority govern the way people should live. She wishes to unite people through her singing, and to inspire people to live. Her ideology is more personal, uniquely applied, and is idealistic and romantic.

2. The quiz sequence

An interesting thing about this sequence is the first two questions have quite reasonable answers. At the start of it, at least.

The first question is about nurturing and letting go. I think why most of the girls agreed to put the bird in a cage is because to do something great, you must first be equipped to survive. Maslow's bottom hierarchy, if you will. i think Sunday realizes this too, and puts it into some of his points to justify making decisions on behalf of other people.

"We must teach the weak how to live a happy life"

Though, the problem is that he twists this point so much and wants to force this on everyone. This is seen when he puts everyone on Penacony in Ena's dream. This disregard for other people's input kinda reflects how he sees the bird, in a way. The bird is something below Sunday, it cannot object his actions because it is merely just a weak, injured little thing.

It is here that he experienced pain of futility. The pain of putting in effort into something but have it crash and burn in the end no matter what. Afraid of that pain, he wonders if birds are meant for the sky if some fall before they can reach it. He has a very black and white mindset about this.

Either all birds fly and deserve the sky, or if even one bird falls then no birds deserve the sky.

The second question is about a person who is being pursued by the bloodhounds. Sunday is in a position of power, and has the influence to pardon the man. As a result, the man got away, forgot about his children, and hurt the people working under him in penacony.

Though, it's worth to mention that I think it's also partly the fault of the Oak family, who didn't try to discourage dreamchasers trying to find answers or solve their personal problems in Penacony. But I believe that's intentional.

Anyways, the crux of the question, if Sunday had known the outcome of his decision from the start and he had the foresight to think that Penacony isn't a place to search for answers, I actually think upholding the law would be the best course of action here.

I think this is where he developped his fear of... consequence. Because humanity has free will, they may use his pardon from the law to do awful things. This might be why he values upholding the law so much.

Another thing to note, I think Sunday hasn't gone off too far into the deep end at this point of his life. In a previous sequence with the same scenario, he actually questions what devotion to the Order would be like, and his doubts on its way of life.

"Who can judge the strong when their power hides their crimes?"

"Who can vouch for the weak when they will pay any price to survive?"

"Who can comfort the purest souls when even they get led astray?"

It's important to note that Sunday is in a position of power and emphasizes knowing the outcome of the first two questions.

The third question is the only question where he and the other party were of near equal standing. It's where he still hasn't made a decision, and which the outcome has not yet been decided.

Sunday cares about Robin's input and feelings. He cares so much he doesn't have it in him to force her to stay for the Order.

I think this is the crack in his belief of the Order. Because he cannot stop her from trying to fly. Because he cannot apply his law indiscriminately. Because it's Robin. His sister.

He has not made a choice, and Robin has not met her end yet like he's feared.

But he's so afraid of the pain of losing her. He's so afraid it haunts him in his nightmares.

After presenting the quiz, he essentially asks the main question of penacony: "Why does life slumber?"

He answers, "Because we are afraid to awaken from our dreams."

Interestingly, this is identical to Firefly's conclusion in 2.0. The difference is, Sunday thinks his answer is universal and will force his solution on everyone, while Firefly's is just her own personal answer.

Firefly asks what the price for Sunday's paradise is, and that made me stand up and point at the screen in agreement. Because what Sunday's aiming for is an authoritarian universe.

When an authority reigns supreme that it forces its will onto unwilling citizens, all in the name of the ideal society. That's a dystopia.

As Sunday said before, who will keep the authority in check? Who can ensure that the authority will not abuse their power?

That's what's so dangerous about an authoritarian government. You can't take the risk when it comes to this. You can't just give the power to one person, no matter how righteous or nice they seem. Because like the saying goes, give them an inch and they will take a mile. You cannot afford to cross the line, because when you do, who knows how far they'll take it.

Sunday clearly sees Firefly as someone weak, kind of akin to the bird in his childhood who needs his "saving". But Firefly does not appreciate someone deciding on her behalf whether she's weak or needs saving.

3. Ode to Order

I think it's important to note Sunday really frames Ode to Order in this angelic and holy way. Hell, the music even reflects this with a more bright and heavenly choir.

"Requiem aeternam" is a prayer for souls to reach heaven, eternal rest.

(A bit of a tangent, but when I saw this in the game I SHIVERED so hard. This is such creative story telling aughh- Like, using previously established game mechanics and twisting them to become something horrifying is SO COOL. What a delightfully terrifying way to illustrate what Sunday aims to achieve.)

This illustrates Sunday's paradise as a place where everyone is forcefully "tuned" to become a certain way forever. To be manipulated with Ena's strings without their consent like puppets into a picture perfect scene.

Though, I was confused why Sunday framed this ideal society as people abandoning the need for an authority, when it was something he was pushing so hard in previous sequences.

But my interpretation is that he will spread this message, of everyone being of equal standing, but leave himself as the true leader that will stay awake to ensure everyone else is blissfully asleep.

This really ties everything together for me. Sunday is someone so self righteous but self sacrificial that he's willing to put himself high in the sky, and be aware that he will be completely alone up there.

He is afraid of pain, and will do everything to avoid experiencing it ever again.

After experiencing pain, we shouldn't be scared of it. Sure, we can escape a bit to get some reprieve, but we must tend to our wounds so that we may not only survive, but live.

That brings me to the second major theme of Penacony : Nihility, and the feeling of futility

I will be breaking down Acheron's character first.

Self annihilators/Nihility emanators are so interesting, they are beings that slowly are losing themselves thanks to their own powers of Nihility. A predetermined end.

Living for so long + Nihility actively chipping away at her being is sure to make her memories blend in together. This is why Acheron values emotions so much, because it is one of the only anchors she can use to avoid succumbing to Nihility.

Her flashbacks with Tiernan are beautifully melancholic. Their exchange starts with Acheron pondering if the task Tiernan is doing is pointless, and if he should even bother? And if the end is expected, then should they change it? It's a bit muddy, but I interpret that here, Acheron is still searching for the meaning of Nihility, and Tiernan is the person who guides the souls to the other side of the river at that time.

In the next scene, Acheron states she's holding on to whatever she can to avoid succumbing to Nihility. She had journeyed with a Nameless girl once, who wanted to explore IX. But as expected, the girl ceased to be, but left with a smile. Acheron is scared of forgetting her memories with that girl.

The only other anchor she knows is of her promise to bring more warmth to other people, to a more hopeful future where she will cut off Nihility. She associates that promise and hope with the color of red.

The next scene mirrors the first scene. I interpret it as Acheron having found the meaning of Nihility, sorta embracing it, and is now guiding others to advance towards and depart the Nihility, with Tiernan having forgotten himself.

When Tiernan asks if what Acheron does is pointless, she gave the same answer Tiernan gave her, because some things have to be done. And she's come this far without needing a point, so why should she search for one?

"May death be the end of your boundless dream... guiding you back to the waking world."

I still cannot decipher the meaning of this statement completely. As far as I know, it's said 2 times. The first is after Firefly "died", and the second is in the above exchange with Tiernan.

In Firefly's case, perhaps the "death" refers to waking up from Ena's dream at the beginning, "boundless dream" is Ena's dream, and "the waking world" is Dreamflux Reef/reality.

In Tiernan's case, I can assume the "boundless dream" is his eternal unrest, as he's still lingering in the dead sea, not yet ready to enter the abyss of Nihility. The "death" may be referring to him entering the abyss, while the "waking world" is existence, as he finds his way out of Nihility.

To bring this all together, I think Acheron in this case represents and goes against Nihility. She presents Nihility as something inevitable and predetermined (death), something that awaits everyone, and something that everyone will have to embrace at some point of their lifespan (boundless dream).

But she also believes that one shouldn't wholeheartedly embrace Nihility. in the face of Nihility, we must do everything to take in the world around us and remember what makes us exist. She believes there is a way out of Nihility, and that is existence. (waking world)

In the face of futility, if everything really did have a predetermined end, I believe we should still try to make choices. Despite it being "pointless", I think that's what gives meaning to our existence. Otherwise, we risk succumbing to Nihility.

That's why when the trailblazer finally uttered their own choices, I felt shivers. One, because this shows the development of TB's character, and two because TB will do what they have to, they will never be content living in a dream, and they choose to continue in the face of "futility", despite the ending of their journey being predetermined.

In the face of futility, Sunday chooses to eliminate pain and choice out of the equation, only choosing to create a universe that's stuck in a mindless, blissful stasis. Because he is anticipating pain.

But sometimes, the anticipation is worse than the actual pain itself. He is also eliminating the element of choice, with the assumption that people will not be able to survive when they are facing futility.

But, Acheron's words really struck me.

In the face of futility, pain, and pressure humans may freeze in fear. But that innate survival instinct in humans might push them to fight and claw themselves out to save themselves. By removing the choice to fight for their lives, they won't have the choice to fight off Nihility.

To end this, I would like to go back to main question of Penacony

"Why does life slumber?"

And I think TB answers this beautifully.

"Because we will wake from our dreams."

Life slumbers to find reprieve from the harsh reality. But slumbering does not give us the solution to our problems, only recharging us to prepare for the waking world once more. And in the waking world, even if what we do is futile, we still have a choice in how we want to reach for the end.

[isa-ghost]

OKAY UM MORE HC WITH THE EGGS IF U GOT ANY (ANY OF THE EGGS)

I'm gonna do Richas because he's my favorite after Chayanne and Lullah :D

qPhil headcanons masterlist

Richas scares Phil a little bc he's a brand of wildchild he's never encountered before. And his parents?? For the most part are just fine with that?? Survivalist man is screaming.

If the Cellbit and Baghera rescue mission had actually happened, Phil would've seen a whole new side of Richas and it'd change his perspective a bit. Still an unhinged gremlin, but also fearless, determined, full of endless love and loyalty. He knows what he's doing and he does it well, he just needs adults to trust that he can do it.

This goes for Pac too, but any jokes Richas makes with his prosthetic leg make Phil lose it, they always take him by surprise and they're always the right amount of out of pocket to make Phil reel. It's even better if Richas removes the prosthetic and does some wild ass shit with it. He's made Phil screech before. It was a mistake on Phil's part, now he tries to make him scream on purpose.

A lot of "peak qsmp era" horrors felt centered around the Brazilians and goddamn does Phil think Richas is so unbelievably resilient bc of it. That kid is so happy go lucky and comes off so carefree despite everything that's happened to him or his myriad of parents and Phil just cannot fathom it bc he would've broken by now.

Which btw Phil thinks it's rlly fucking funny that Richas was collecting parents like Pokémon and every now and then he'd try to come up with a funny convoluted way to Also become Richas's parent purely for the bit. Never came up with one good enough though, being previously FWB with Fit didn't feel like a good enough pipeline. Richas totally would've accepted that reason though.

Be it through his usual brand of unhinged fuckery or genuine persuasion, I think Richas could've gotten Phil to try any Brazilian food or snack, even if Phil was like "there's no way I'll like that." I'm truthing Richas would get him addicted to smth besides Guaraná.

GOD Richas would've loved to spar with Phil. Phil would be far too nervous to go all out on the kid but Richas would absolutely love it.

Richas's tiny arms never fail to make Phil laugh. He just can't. All Richas has to do is Orange Justice and it's all over, Phil's dying until he gets the hiccups.

Richas would be the motherfucker constantly badgering Phil to go fishing if he was able to go back to the Hardcore World with him.

He's, like many others, is in the Phil Take Me Flying When Your Wings Work club.

Tbfh more accurately I think Richas is impatient to hatch in the hopes he'll have wings so he can be taught to fly himself. (And the heart attacks he'd give Phil then.... MAN)

I don't know where in the deep recesses of my brain this came from but I need them in a laser tag fight on the same team because Richas would THRIVE watching Pro Halo Sniper Tío Philza Minecraft absolutely obliterate motherfuckers.

Phil feels a teeny bit bad about it but he's genuinely surprised Richas didn't perma-die with how reckless he could be.

Phil 100% noticed a change in Richas post-Purgatory and isn't sure if it was because of that or because of a death he had around then. Whatever it was, he picked up on Richas seeming a lot more Fuck It We Ball but in a kinda,, maybe needs to at least talk about it to someone way. Not his kid so he didn't want to butt in or overstep, but he still felt worried about it.

100% thinks Richas is overall underestimated though. Or maybe Richas intentionally fools people into thinking such. But Mr. Angel of Death can see it, that kid's TNT in a shell.

[devastatinglygreen]

If im being completely honest there’s a big part of me that is afraid that the fallout from LW reveal will damage them to a place I won’t find myself rooting for them anymore. I mean what if he goes back to fake take Colin and there’s a whole Friends-esque ‘we were on a break!’ situation of him being with someone else? What if they call off the engagement entirely and all we end up with at the end of episode 8 is reunited Polin but nothing more? No wedding or babies or anything? I know it’ll be real bad and hurt and I know it needs to happen, I’m concerned about the journey they’ll take from the reveal to reconciliation. How bad do you see it getting? Broken engagement? Estranged until the last bit of episode 8 as other seasons have done? Would love to hear your thoughts!

i spent a while trying to figure out how to answer this without a bunch of spoilers and truthfully, the only thing i have is do you trust the story you're watching? what about the first part of season 3 made you think that's going to happen?

or did a bunch of the sky is falling blogs/twitter users/reddit threads give you anxiety?

and i mean that sincerely. even if they do something you don't particularly like, is your idea of the story stronger than the story itself and it hinders your overall enjoyment? those people are the ones who seem to be the most unhappy with season 3 so far.

also, i am pretty sure i know where the original freak out of the ross and rachel thing came about but luke newton said this:

i don't think he was talking about being on a break.

also they're following the book pretty well, or at least adding a good amount of it in there, and there's a whole plot/character growth for them happens after the wedding. a pretty important one at that.

i meant what i said in that i think the LW fight is going to be painful but i actually don't think the conflict will last all that long, tbh. not to bring up the book like it's gospel but seriously, colin is very aware of how society treats her and it colors the way he thinks of society because of it. he knows he's privileged and well liked and life is easier for him because of it.

eloise is still convinced that her every thought is the right one and overlooks penelope in a lot of ways which gives her sense of betrayal almost a prideful feel to it. colin is both in love with penelope and aware of her in a way that eloise isn't. i'm sure their fight will hurt and be angsty but love isn't a black and white proposition, it's got a lot more layers than that and colin's understanding and love of penelope would play into that i assume.

i suppose i'm just not worried about it. i don't have to like every part of a story to love the end result. i also don't think, after seeing how badly people reacted to every overblown spoiler/rumor, that people should take someone online on their word over the show itself and the people who worked on it.

[beauty-and-passion]

This is going to sound really strange but the most recent GRWM video has. Some of the best Janus characterisation I think we’ve seen in a while?? Also he canonically sheds now, so

You are not wrong, anon: this is the best characterization in a while. It's way better than the last one, in which Janus was mostly a drunk idiot, and it's way worse than SvS. This one sits in the middle: it's not bad, it's not amazing. It's good.

Just like Mr. Sanders' last videos regarding Sanders Sides, this GRWM is okay. Not groundbreaking, not impressive, not deep, not stupid. Just okay.

And trust me, this is the best possible outcome! When I found out Thomas was planning a video with Janus and it was a GRWM and Janus had questions to answer... I wasn't just scared, oh no. I was absolutely terrified. I feared to see the destruction of Janus' character. I feared to see him being all like: "YASSS QUEEN all I love is WINE and nothing else, also being SASSY is my religion BIATCH".

And we got a bit of that, sure. But it was a bit, not the avalanche I expected. I was bearable.

After all, this is just a random video. There's nothing plot-related here. Heck, there's not even too much Sanders Sides stuff, because this GRWM clearly was Thomas' attempts to reconnect with the character. I shouldn't care too much about it. I shouldn't overanalyze it.

But you know me: you know I love to over-analyze. And if you know me, you also know that Remus is my favorite child, but Janus has a special place in my heart and if one little thing about him is off I will start rambling.

Hence why I will overanalyze the shit out of these 9 minutes of a video and I will do what I shouldn't do, i.e. look back into the past's characterization. Not for shaming Mr. Sanders for not remembering it (even if the videos still exist and he can watch them too if he wants), but to remind you all of Janus' personality. The public needs to remember what kind of character he was and who he became.

So I'll over-analyze everything and no, you can't escape. You're stuck with me here, so put your seatbelt on, because you're in for one of the things I love the most: talking about Janus.

The importance of nuance

Let's talk about make-up a little bit. Don't worry, by the end you will understand my point.

The current make-up isn't even comparable to the past one. And if a lot of people complain about it and prefer the old one, it's not because they're all demanding: it's because of nuances.

Let me explain and let's start with the current photo Mr. Sanders showed to promote the GRWM video:

If you look at this make-up, your eyes will inevitably be drawn towards that sharp black line. And as soon as you will look at it, you will immediately register it as a drawn line.

It's so clear and so evident it's a line, I can literally see the black liquid eyeliner, the tip and the hand tracing that line on Thomas' skin.

But this line isn't supposed to be a line: it's supposed to be/resemble a snake's mouth.

Now, look at the past make-up:

The line isn't sharp black: the line is nuanced. You can see a bit of brown and a hint of red/pink to give it depth and emphasize the shadow.

Also, this color is very similar to the little shadow given by Thomas' upper lip on the lower one, so it looks more natural against his skin tone. It doesn't seem like something added on him, but on something that was already part of him. And isn't that the goal of make-up? To add something and disappear, so people won't notice it exists in the first place?

Look at the eye as well: the past one is a softer, more nuanced pink. It looks more natural, against Thomas' skin tone. The present one is so dark, it looks more like a bad bruise.

So the problem with the current make-up isn't just that the colors aren't the same: it's that the current colors are too much. They're too sharp, too saturated and, consequently, too fake. It's clear that Thomas wears make-up, while in the past the blend was softer, the colors closer to Thomas' actual complexion. Consequently, the make-up faded and gave us an illusion of reality.

I know Mr. Sanders had skin conditions and everything, but I'm talking about colors and nuances here. Two things a make-up artist should know better than me, an idiot on the Internet who loves art, color theory and learns from artists on the web. You can obtain these things independently of the used products.

So my opinion on the make-up would be: please Mr. Sanders, switch for softer tones, no sharp black and no coral. Too much. Nuance is the key.

And not just for make-up.

---

The fakeness of reality tv

Janus enjoys reality television because nothing about it is real. His specific words are:

I very much enjoy reality television: the scheming, the plotting, the lying. Every person for himself and even on top of that, all of the production none of reality television is actually real. It's just delightful.

I get the idea behind it and I understand why Thomas thought it was a good choice. On paper, it works: Janus should enjoy this kind of show because it's made of lies and he's Deceit.

But if I follow this line of thought, I inevitably meet with Janus from Into the Unknown:

[Patton]: Well yeah I guess you'd like it, everyone all dressed up, disguised as someone else... [Janus]: How is it we've had so many of these visits and you still know so little about me?

Janus himself said that not everything associated with lies is something he enjoys. And it makes sense, because Logan too said the same thing in the last Aside:

"Is that all I am to you? The reading guy?"

So now I'm asking: why does he like reality tv? Just because it's fake? Then why is he so happy about it being fake? Reality tv should represent reality, it should mirror how society works. And thanks to SvS, we know Janus doesn't hold society into high consideration:

[Deceit]: Society itself is a lie! (...) You get enough people to share a piece of land and breathe the same air and... you've got a society. Why? It's just a bunch of people in the same general area. It's an abstract concept, as real as the monster under your bed! But we obey these rules or get punished for breaking them. All in the name of society. It's absurd and terrifying.

Just like society, reality tv has a group of people put together and they make a society. It's an abstract concept, as real as the monster under your bed. And these people must obey the rules or get punished for breaking them.

And yet, Janus doesn't think reality tv is "absurd and terrifying", but "delightful".

Again: why does he like it? Why does he like something so similar to what he hates most?

Maybe you can live with the "It's fake" explanation and that's good for you. But what if instead of liking reality tv because "it's fake", Janus likes it, because it perfectly mirrors the flaws and the emptiness of society? What if he enjoys it, because he loves the irony of society using its own means to unmask itself and show its real face? What if he watches it, not because "it's delightful", but because it's bittersweet to see such an inability to understand your own flaws?

Which explanation do you think is more fitting for his character?

---

Remus eats glue sticks

Of course he does. His digestive system is probably able to digest molten lava, so glue sticks are a walk in the park for him, bless his chaotic soul <3

(Have I already said Remus is my favorite boi?)

---

The possibilities of shedding

Okay, the "Have you considered not having pores?" is hilarious and I love it on multiple levels.

Well, here we are. Janus sheds, two to four times a year. And I know the fandom went crazy over this and I'm happy for you... but I never really cared too much about it.

I mean: it's fine, but I can't really think of anything truly special to headcanon about it. Snakes shed their skin all the time and they just chill around, while slowly peeling their skin off. It's not dangerous, it doesn't hurt, it's just exfoliation time✨. I mean, does it hurt you, when you remove sunburnt skin? Don't think so. The worst thing for snakes is probably not being able to take the skin off with hands, since they don't have hands.

But hey, this is canon now, so I should probably integrate it in my headcanon. And I can do it in two different ways:

The shedding is just part of Janus' routine: twice a year he gets one day off, takes a reeeeally long bath and slowly peels off his skin until he's done.

I can take inspiration from this fanart and imagine the shedding as a real "leaving your body behind" process, in which Janus slowly gets submerged into his room and re-emerges as a form of pure power and instincts, which then solidifies into a new body. I think I like this idea more, because when I go with Janus, I need something that makes him look either more god-like or more monster-like.

And since we're talking about snake traits, how many more does he have? Because I already added a few on my list, like:

sunbathing

climbing trees

laying everywhere (especially on trees)

taking long relaxing baths

And I'm just waiting for an excuse to add "mating". But I suppose only future will tell.

---

What you don't like

"An important aspect of being oneself, in addition to knowing what you like, is knowing what you don't like and saying to that thing: ew get away from me, I don't like you... Roman"

Okay, that was genuinely funny and it made me smile, so kudos for that, Mr. Sanders. It was a clever move and I enjoyed it.

Also, for more reasons I will explain further down, this makes me want to write a conversation between Janus and Roman, to study how they work together, why they don't like each other and their personalities in general. My only problem would be to put it on a timeline, because I don't like to write things suspended in a temporal vacuum. If inspiration strikes, maybe I'll do it.

---

Religion... and self-preservation

Now, I don't know who made that question about Jesus Christ, but you. You. You gave me real fear... but also indirectly confirmed one of my headcanons, so thank you, I suppose.

I was bracing myself, waiting and hoping Thomas didn't say anything stupid, because Janus and religion have a super tight bond and one misstep can lead to me rambling for the rest of my life, all while throwing canon into the trash because no one can say anything wrong about the relationship Janus has with religion, not even Mr. Sanders.

But the answer was... okay. Harmless. A bit simplistic, maybe, but I can accept Janus saying that Jesus is cool for having followers and turning water into wine.

What really struck me the most was when he said Jesus is his style because "he refuses to die".

For me, that's the most important part of the video. You can take away everything else, because this is the only part that matters for me.

Why? Because this is the essence of self-preservation. Because, as I said in the past, self-preservation is that force that protects you from dangers, threats, even yourself. And it protects you from death. It's part of that intrinsic will to live that defines all living creatures.

So, since Janus encompasses this role too, it has always been implied (at least for me) that he's that force that will fight against death until the end, just to make Thomas live a little longer. In my headcanon, he literally refuses to think Thomas can die before his time, because he's built to not make this happen.

Hence why when I saw Janus putting such emphasis on the idea that Jesus refuses to die made me immensely happy, because it's (implied) canon. Janus refuses to die, because he will never surrender to death. Because it's his nature, to never surrender to it.

---

Deceit or Ego?

The snake telepathy part was fun when mentioned, then it was followed by the "memememe I'm gorgeous" part, which is perfect if you're the representation of Ego, a bit less if you're deceit.

Speaking of that, I think there's a bit of confusion in Thomas' mind regarding these two aspects. And since they're represented by two different Sides, the contrast is even more jarring.

Janus is confident and this is part of his personality. But confidence isn't repeating "me" in your head 400 times and telling yourself that you're gorgeous and handsome even when sitting still. This isn't confidence, this is Ego. This is something Roman could say to himself... and he did it, in the past. He looked at himself all the time, called himself gorgeous, asked if his makeup was okay because the prince's gonna slay, said he dramatically serenaded himself in front of the mirror. All these things are a constant reconfirmation of yourself and this is what the Ego does: it constantly reconfirms you're great and cool and gorgeous.

Confidence, on the other hand, doesn't need constant confirmations. If you're confident, you already know you're great, you don't need to repeat it yourself. You just do your things and if others criticize you, you shrug their reprimands off.

One example of confidence from this video? This part:

"What are my guilty pleasures?" Guilty pleasures? Why would a pleasure be guilty? I've got none of those. Indulge in your pleasures guilt-free, people: life is short.

This proves Janus is confident, WAY MORE than him repeating how cool he is. This is the tone he should've had for most of the video, not that "Oh, look at how cool I am".

Also because it may seem a paradox, but the more you repeat how cool you are, the less people will believe you. That's why people who constantly show off are perceived as weak and insecure: because they search for a constant reconfirmation they would probably never need, if they were truly confident.

---

All of the selfcare - and what else?

Aside from the things I already mentioned, the rest of the video is mostly made of advice like "your opinion is the only one that matters/others are less than you/don't give a shit about others".

I don't know if this is Mr. Sanders making a reminder to himself to not indulge in criticism too much, but okay, let's ignore it XD

These pieces of advice can all be traced back to another aspect of Janus' personality: the self-care one. The last canonical one.

And since it's the last, I can understand why Thomas latched onto it and made it be like 60% of the video. It's probably the part of Janus' character he remembers the most.

And it's the easiest too, along with the "sassy" aspect. Put them together and you get the sassy queen who tells you to relax dear, don't give a fuck about the rest of the world.

So I understand you, anon, when you say this is the best characterization in a while: it is, because it's based on the last canonical piece of Janus' character, mixed with the "sassy" aspect that developed more recently. Of course it seems more coherent with Janus' character, compared to him being drunk for an entire video.

But even if canonical, self-care is just an aspect of Janus' personality and it makes most of the video. The remaining part is a huge amount of Ego, which shouldn't even be here, because it's Roman's trait.

And the other aspects? Nowhere to be seen. No distaste for society, no cryptic language, no wittiness, barely any lie, barely any real confidence, barely any body language and zero foreseeing ability.

I know what you're thinking and yes, I said at the beginning that this video is clearly just a way for Mr. Sanders to reconnect with the character. So I understand why Janus' personality is like that and that there are mistakes or incomplete things. I am not blaming Thomas for trying.

I am writing this post, to remind you Janus' full personality. To remind you that he's not just "sassy wine aunt/self-care queen".

On the contrary, I think present Janus is exactly like his make-up: the traits are similar to the original one, but the aspects are too sharp. They should be here, they are part of him, but they're not in the exact shade or nuance to be him. They are similar, but off, because something is missing. And that something is nuance.

In the end, that's what this post is all about: nuance. Past Janus was more nuanced, because he was more than one aspect. Present Janus is less nuanced, because he's stuck between two aspects - which is a truly cruel irony, considering his entire thing is being a gray, multifaceted character.

My only hope is that, just like with the make-up, Mr. Sanders will find a way to bring nuances back into Janus' character and make him at least similar to who he used to be.

[cursedvibes]

The more I think about this chapter and read others takes the less negative I’ve become towards it. I’m just neutral now and if anything I quite like a lot of things in here, especially since the full TCB translations are out now. I’m still disgruntled about Yuuji like literally being thrown to the side though.

I never cared for Yuuta but he did need a last hoorah, so I hope it is a last hoorah that Yuuta fans find good.

It has been interesting seeing people’s takes on the story and what the theme of the story is meant to be. I actually kind of disagree with the takes that JJK is a nihilistic story, for how dark and gritty it can be it very much seems to be a story of hope and change than just a story where good people fail.

I have settled my emotions a bit too. Mostly just feel tired. My main issue is like you said that Yuuji is just getting thrown to the side when we finally get a tense moment between him and Sukuna. Gege really wants to stretch that fight. Yuuji was literally digging into his chest after just landing a Black Flash. Sukuna apparently felt so threatened that he healed his brain and CT, which is quite risky, to cast a domain. But then he can just shove Yuuji away and that's it? Also this Sukuna vs Gojo rehash is for one redundant and also very ill-timed. They could've done this when Sukuna was about to unleash Furnace or his altered domain. When people were actually in danger and Yuuta's sacrifice could've meant something. Yuuta gives a very passionate speech, but the whole time I just have to think that that's really not needed. If they need back-up, the people who got transported away could just come back. Maki's Soul Blade actually seems much more useful here, since we know hurting Sukuna's soul is how you actually get him down.

Also, Yuuta telling Maki that she doesn't understand what it means to be a monster and that she's scared leaves a really bad taste in my mouth. He didn't directly target her, but maybe have some self-awareness about who you're talking to? Not ooc though I would say, nor the rest of his speech and plan.

Another thing that I find confusing is why Yuuta can't heal himself, but is then able to grow Gojo's body together. If it's because of the stitches, Shoko could've stitched up his real body too. Could be that Kenjaku's technique gives a healing boost after the transfer, but they don't talk about that and I don't know how they would know that either. Nobody has ever seen Kenjaku change vessels.

But yeah, overall my reaction is just "do we need to do this again?". I don't agree with the criticisms I've seen that this is too dark, too bleak, too immoral, irredeemable and especially all those comparisons to horror and psychothriller stories. Seems to come also a lot from the people who think Choso's death was bad. Like using Gojo's body like that is grim, it shows how rotten jujutsu society is and that they perpetuate this mindset even in the students, but I think it just shows Yuuta breaking under pressure and emphasizing certain character flaws of his. A negative development. Not necessarily bad. If anything it shows why Yuuji can be the only one to defeat Sukuna because he doesn't give in to Sukuna's believes and he won't let the jujutsu system rob him of his value of life. Even if he sees himself as a tool, he does not treat others like that and he has always been someone who saw Gojo as a human first and the strongest sorcerer second. I wouldn't even say jjk is bleak right now. People have died and Yuuta threw his humanity away, but they are still gradually chipping away at Sukuna.

Certainly not nihilistic. There are very clear values governing the whole story as seen by the dichotomy of Sukuna and Yuuji. I do think they could've been put more into focus by using Shinjuku Showdown to highlight both of their mindsets and hone in more on Sukuna and Yuuji's mentality through it, but it's far from being nihilistic. Everything has meaning, Yuuta just now made the choice to compromise his previous morals. That doesn't mean the overall message is mute. Yuuta only played a small part in it to begin with after all. It's character development for him, but not a complete overthrow of the story's themes. He was told to become stronger he needs to throw away his humanity and disregard others. The challenge for him was to fight while still maintaining his humanity at the cost of not being The Strongest. He failed and also hasn't fully committed to that path, he's just perpetuating Gojo's dehumanization by saying there needs to be someone to fill that role. Someone who needs to stand at the top, despite even Gojo saying (or previously believing) that this burden shouldn't be carried by just one person. That's why he raised the students to be strong. Not quite the right approach either and not a break of the principles of jujutsu society, but certainly not what Yuuta took away from all this that there needs to be one pillar of strength far removed from the others who does the dirty work for them.

So like there is something there in the chapter, an attempt was made to say something, even though I don't think it quite stuck the landing. Doesn't make me especially ecstatic for the next chapters either though.

[ingravinoveritas]

I just want to say I love your blog- I came across it last night and completely went down the rabbit hole and completely convinced of the MS/DT love. I wanted to know what you thought of this video

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8p7x9jV/

Even the mere mention of his name that is not appearing to be about Michael Sheen, David makes it about him and lights up. What do you think about how David reacts in interviews, shows etc where either David brings him up on his own or he comes up and he reacts? I see his demeanor change almost instantly. I feel that people don’t see as much of this coming from David and even though it’s not as obvious as Michael, it’s really there.

Hi there! Well thank you so much for the kind words about my blog--I'm always happy to know folks like what I am doing and are enjoying my ridiculous posts. I really appreciate it!

That video you linked to is a great one, and one I have talked about previously on my blog. I'll put my gifs up here so we have a visual reference:

The first thing (of course) that stood out to me was this random fan mentioning his friend, and immediately David thought of Michael. Because there are a lot of Michaels in the world, after all. Michael Caine. Michael Myers. George Michael, even. And yet David's mind went straight to Michael Sheen--his Michael--and that seems so telling.

I also have a tag on my blog for the many instances of David and Michael bringing each other up when the other isn't there, as that is also one of my favorite things. There are a lot of wonderful examples there, but I think one that is really worth checking out is a podcast David was on two years ago with fellow actor Paapa Essiedu. Paapa brought up Michael earlier in the interview, but later on it's David who brings him up, and there is such impossible fondness in his voice when he talks about him.

(I think this also ties into something I've discussed a few times on my blog, which is David feeling more comfortable opening up when doing an audio interview where we can't see him, versus a video interview where we can. A supposition that rings particularly true in the case of David's own podcast episode where he interviewed Michael in 2019.)

One of the most memorable things David said in the interview with Michael is, "You're an honest version of how I'm feeling." Five years ago, this seemed especially true because David was so much more reserved than Michael--less obvious, as you said--but in no way did that mean his feelings were less strong. What we see now in David's reactions when Michael is brought up--that shift in demeanor, that complete softness he emanates in a way he doesn't with others--is the externalization of something that was always there on the inside.

In that vein, I want to make sure your second Ask doesn't go unaddressed, as the NTAs are another vivid example of David's softness around Michael, and to date, still one of the most special nights in the fandom. I've written about a lot of my thoughts on it in detail, so I invite you to check out my #NTA Awards 2021 tag for a whole lot of analysis and discourse.

I hope this helps to answer your questions. Thanks for writing in! x

[winepresswrath]

last night's episodes of totnt mostly irritated me with very bad pacing, which is a shame, because I was so charmed by the lead up. there have been too many redundant meetings and also too many people stopping to monologue about how sad it will be if Lee Yeon dies. >:( I was ready to have brainworms for at least two weeks, show. Also, going into the final episodes there has still been no actual explanation for why the main character abandoned his kid brother on a burning mountain with a dead puppy aside from "he was very sad." im beginning to question whether he was locked in a hell dimension at all.

[arabela25]

The Liverpool Songbook | Eurovision Song Contest 2023

[lurking-latinist]

⛵

[brittlebutch]

actually first ep of Voyager where Janeway talks to Tuvok about how his family misses him is that when she says they Worry about him Tuvok contradicts her and claims that Vulcans don't do that but when she corrects and says they Miss him he accepts this and admits he misses them too; implying perhaps a pedantic difference between 'Vulcans do not Feel Emotions' (false) and 'Vulcans do not Act Out of Emotion' (accurate) -> 'Miss/Longing' is an emotion, but 'Worry' is an action one does out of emotion -> one Vulcans do; one Vulcans do not.

[t-u-i-t-c]

chapter xlvii