#I may have missed some points but feel free to shout at me in the comments or reblogs

[fruit-sy]

My personal thoughts on the major themes of Penacony 2.2

I was gonna make an entire Penacony retrospective and try to really dig into the whole story, but 1. I'm not that smart and 2. It has hours of footage and I don't think I'm strong enough to parse through that and form my own conclusions

so, just the things that really jumped at me and made me pause to think. I may do surface level research to make sure if a character really said this or that, but other than that, these are my thoughts fresh after finishing the quest.

Ok, to start off: Sunday and the road to hell

He's... god, he's such a complicated and interesting little man.

He is what I would call the embodiment of the saying "the road to hell is paved with good intentions". On the surface, he is trying to make a universe which is authoritarian-like. If you peel it back a bit more, he intends to make the universe a better place. But at the heart of it, I think he's just someone who is scared of pain.

There are 3 sequences I want to break down:

The Robin-Sunday exchanges before they meet Gopher Wood

This exchange has a lot of Sunday misdirecting Robin's points, but she calls out most of it.

Robin starts off with observing the dreamscape and concludes that dreamchasers shouldn't use penacony as a means of escaping entirely from reality. Because they won't overcome their demons. She asks if this can really count as "living"

Sunday at first seems to agree that things are not the way it should be. But there's a bit of misdirection on his part. He responded to robin's question by connecting "people using penacony as an escape" with (his opinion on) the way people currently "live" (which is what he was agreeing to in "things are not the way it should be"). He will then frame the narrative to show that people completely escaping through dreams is a good thing, and then will swerve to say how the "strong" should determine the future of the "weak".

Robin understandably does not agree with Sunday's narrative, because she believes that by staying in the dream (or MAKING dreamchasers stay in the dream), it will lock dreamchasers in stasis forever, making them unable to choose how to go about their future and overcome their difficulties. She then criticizes that no one has the right to determine whether a human deserves to live for a future or not.

There's a clear difference in ideology here. Sunday's devotion to Order is so strong because the experiences in his life had led him to believe that forcing his will on other people is the way to go. His ideology is rigid, cold, impersonal and is applied to all uniformly.

Robin firmly believes in choice and refuses to let an authority govern the way people should live. She wishes to unite people through her singing, and to inspire people to live. Her ideology is more personal, uniquely applied, and is idealistic and romantic.

2. The quiz sequence

An interesting thing about this sequence is the first two questions have quite reasonable answers. At the start of it, at least.

The first question is about nurturing and letting go. I think why most of the girls agreed to put the bird in a cage is because to do something great, you must first be equipped to survive. Maslow's bottom hierarchy, if you will. i think Sunday realizes this too, and puts it into some of his points to justify making decisions on behalf of other people.

"We must teach the weak how to live a happy life"

Though, the problem is that he twists this point so much and wants to force this on everyone. This is seen when he puts everyone on Penacony in Ena's dream. This disregard for other people's input kinda reflects how he sees the bird, in a way. The bird is something below Sunday, it cannot object his actions because it is merely just a weak, injured little thing.

It is here that he experienced pain of futility. The pain of putting in effort into something but have it crash and burn in the end no matter what. Afraid of that pain, he wonders if birds are meant for the sky if some fall before they can reach it. He has a very black and white mindset about this.

Either all birds fly and deserve the sky, or if even one bird falls then no birds deserve the sky.

The second question is about a person who is being pursued by the bloodhounds. Sunday is in a position of power, and has the influence to pardon the man. As a result, the man got away, forgot about his children, and hurt the people working under him in penacony.

Though, it's worth to mention that I think it's also partly the fault of the Oak family, who didn't try to discourage dreamchasers trying to find answers or solve their personal problems in Penacony. But I believe that's intentional.

Anyways, the crux of the question, if Sunday had known the outcome of his decision from the start and he had the foresight to think that Penacony isn't a place to search for answers, I actually think upholding the law would be the best course of action here.

I think this is where he developped his fear of... consequence. Because humanity has free will, they may use his pardon from the law to do awful things. This might be why he values upholding the law so much.

Another thing to note, I think Sunday hasn't gone off too far into the deep end at this point of his life. In a previous sequence with the same scenario, he actually questions what devotion to the Order would be like, and his doubts on its way of life.

"Who can judge the strong when their power hides their crimes?"

"Who can vouch for the weak when they will pay any price to survive?"

"Who can comfort the purest souls when even they get led astray?"

It's important to note that Sunday is in a position of power and emphasizes knowing the outcome of the first two questions.

The third question is the only question where he and the other party were of near equal standing. It's where he still hasn't made a decision, and which the outcome has not yet been decided.

Sunday cares about Robin's input and feelings. He cares so much he doesn't have it in him to force her to stay for the Order.

I think this is the crack in his belief of the Order. Because he cannot stop her from trying to fly. Because he cannot apply his law indiscriminately. Because it's Robin. His sister.

He has not made a choice, and Robin has not met her end yet like he's feared.

But he's so afraid of the pain of losing her. He's so afraid it haunts him in his nightmares.

After presenting the quiz, he essentially asks the main question of penacony: "Why does life slumber?"

He answers, "Because we are afraid to awaken from our dreams."

Interestingly, this is identical to Firefly's conclusion in 2.0. The difference is, Sunday thinks his answer is universal and will force his solution on everyone, while Firefly's is just her own personal answer.

Firefly asks what the price for Sunday's paradise is, and that made me stand up and point at the screen in agreement. Because what Sunday's aiming for is an authoritarian universe.

When an authority reigns supreme that it forces its will onto unwilling citizens, all in the name of the ideal society. That's a dystopia.

As Sunday said before, who will keep the authority in check? Who can ensure that the authority will not abuse their power?

That's what's so dangerous about an authoritarian government. You can't take the risk when it comes to this. You can't just give the power to one person, no matter how righteous or nice they seem. Because like the saying goes, give them an inch and they will take a mile. You cannot afford to cross the line, because when you do, who knows how far they'll take it.

Sunday clearly sees Firefly as someone weak, kind of akin to the bird in his childhood who needs his "saving". But Firefly does not appreciate someone deciding on her behalf whether she's weak or needs saving.

3. Ode to Order

I think it's important to note Sunday really frames Ode to Order in this angelic and holy way. Hell, the music even reflects this with a more bright and heavenly choir.

"Requiem aeternam" is a prayer for souls to reach heaven, eternal rest.

(A bit of a tangent, but when I saw this in the game I SHIVERED so hard. This is such creative story telling aughh- Like, using previously established game mechanics and twisting them to become something horrifying is SO COOL. What a delightfully terrifying way to illustrate what Sunday aims to achieve.)

This illustrates Sunday's paradise as a place where everyone is forcefully "tuned" to become a certain way forever. To be manipulated with Ena's strings without their consent like puppets into a picture perfect scene.

Though, I was confused why Sunday framed this ideal society as people abandoning the need for an authority, when it was something he was pushing so hard in previous sequences.

But my interpretation is that he will spread this message, of everyone being of equal standing, but leave himself as the true leader that will stay awake to ensure everyone else is blissfully asleep.

This really ties everything together for me. Sunday is someone so self righteous but self sacrificial that he's willing to put himself high in the sky, and be aware that he will be completely alone up there.

He is afraid of pain, and will do everything to avoid experiencing it ever again.

After experiencing pain, we shouldn't be scared of it. Sure, we can escape a bit to get some reprieve, but we must tend to our wounds so that we may not only survive, but live.

That brings me to the second major theme of Penacony : Nihility, and the feeling of futility

I will be breaking down Acheron's character first.

Self annihilators/Nihility emanators are so interesting, they are beings that slowly are losing themselves thanks to their own powers of Nihility. A predetermined end.

Living for so long + Nihility actively chipping away at her being is sure to make her memories blend in together. This is why Acheron values emotions so much, because it is one of the only anchors she can use to avoid succumbing to Nihility.

Her flashbacks with Tiernan are beautifully melancholic. Their exchange starts with Acheron pondering if the task Tiernan is doing is pointless, and if he should even bother? And if the end is expected, then should they change it? It's a bit muddy, but I interpret that here, Acheron is still searching for the meaning of Nihility, and Tiernan is the person who guides the souls to the other side of the river at that time.

In the next scene, Acheron states she's holding on to whatever she can to avoid succumbing to Nihility. She had journeyed with a Nameless girl once, who wanted to explore IX. But as expected, the girl ceased to be, but left with a smile. Acheron is scared of forgetting her memories with that girl.

The only other anchor she knows is of her promise to bring more warmth to other people, to a more hopeful future where she will cut off Nihility. She associates that promise and hope with the color of red.

The next scene mirrors the first scene. I interpret it as Acheron having found the meaning of Nihility, sorta embracing it, and is now guiding others to advance towards and depart the Nihility, with Tiernan having forgotten himself.

When Tiernan asks if what Acheron does is pointless, she gave the same answer Tiernan gave her, because some things have to be done. And she's come this far without needing a point, so why should she search for one?

"May death be the end of your boundless dream... guiding you back to the waking world."

I still cannot decipher the meaning of this statement completely. As far as I know, it's said 2 times. The first is after Firefly "died", and the second is in the above exchange with Tiernan.

In Firefly's case, perhaps the "death" refers to waking up from Ena's dream at the beginning, "boundless dream" is Ena's dream, and "the waking world" is Dreamflux Reef/reality.

In Tiernan's case, I can assume the "boundless dream" is his eternal unrest, as he's still lingering in the dead sea, not yet ready to enter the abyss of Nihility. The "death" may be referring to him entering the abyss, while the "waking world" is existence, as he finds his way out of Nihility.

To bring this all together, I think Acheron in this case represents and goes against Nihility. She presents Nihility as something inevitable and predetermined (death), something that awaits everyone, and something that everyone will have to embrace at some point of their lifespan (boundless dream).

But she also believes that one shouldn't wholeheartedly embrace Nihility. in the face of Nihility, we must do everything to take in the world around us and remember what makes us exist. She believes there is a way out of Nihility, and that is existence. (waking world)

In the face of futility, if everything really did have a predetermined end, I believe we should still try to make choices. Despite it being "pointless", I think that's what gives meaning to our existence. Otherwise, we risk succumbing to Nihility.

That's why when the trailblazer finally uttered their own choices, I felt shivers. One, because this shows the development of TB's character, and two because TB will do what they have to, they will never be content living in a dream, and they choose to continue in the face of "futility", despite the ending of their journey being predetermined.

In the face of futility, Sunday chooses to eliminate pain and choice out of the equation, only choosing to create a universe that's stuck in a mindless, blissful stasis. Because he is anticipating pain.

But sometimes, the anticipation is worse than the actual pain itself. He is also eliminating the element of choice, with the assumption that people will not be able to survive when they are facing futility.

But, Acheron's words really struck me.

In the face of futility, pain, and pressure humans may freeze in fear. But that innate survival instinct in humans might push them to fight and claw themselves out to save themselves. By removing the choice to fight for their lives, they won't have the choice to fight off Nihility.

To end this, I would like to go back to main question of Penacony

"Why does life slumber?"

And I think TB answers this beautifully.

"Because we will wake from our dreams."

Life slumbers to find reprieve from the harsh reality. But slumbering does not give us the solution to our problems, only recharging us to prepare for the waking world once more. And in the waking world, even if what we do is futile, we still have a choice in how we want to reach for the end.

[kurishiri]

95k bonus . . . Liebe geht durch den Magen

— ꒰ ִ ֺ ⊹ @ notice ⊹ ֺ ִ ꒱ this translation may not be 100% accurate or contain creative liberties due to characterization or narrative flow purposes. if you enjoy, please consider reblogging, but don’t repost these or claim these as your own!

— ꒰ ִ ֺ ⊹ @ warning ⊹ ֺ ִ ꒱ none; it’s really just vogel being silly! hope you’re ready for the dari, nica, and ring galore, hehe.

Kate: A tea party with all of the members of Vogel…?

Victor: Mhm, it seems like all of them have taken an interest in you. So they asked for a chance to speak with you.

Kate: Well, seeing as I’m the only one who isn’t Cursed, I guess it makes sense they would hold an interest.

Victor: Indeed. …How would you like to answer? It’s completely up to you.

V: …However, both parties hold their own secrets.

V: And we do often take care of them, seeing as they are diplomatic guests.

V: Should there be anything making you anxious, or you feel even slightly you don’t want to do this, or anything of the sort, then you are always free to turn them dow—

Kate: …Victor. I will attend the tea party.

Victor: Wait, really? Are you sure?

Kate: Since they have come here to deepen relations between the organizations, turning down an opportunity like this wouldn’t leave a good impression, I’d imagine.

K: And besides, I would like to be of some use to you and Crown, for extending such hospitality to me.

When I expressed my honest feelings, Victor’s expression softened in turn.

Victor: I’m grateful for your honesty. Well then, it’s about time I give them a response.

V: Ahh, but… I’ll have Roger listen in from nearby, so if something happens you can just give a shout, okay?

V: No matter the time and place, I’ll come running.

After Victor’s words resonated in my heart, several days passed——

Darius: Thank you for accepting our invitation, miss fairytale keeper.

D: Did you perhaps prepare everything on this table?

Lined up on the table was filled to the brim with snacks, causing Darius to blink.

Kate: Victor and I prepared them. We were hoping it would be nice if you could eat these…

K: And that we can be on more friendly terms as we’re chatting like this.

Ring: You want to be on more friendly terms with the ones who might kill you? I don’t see the point?

Kate: …Gh.

Nica: Riiing, now don’t go saying gruesome things like that. You’ll bother the Spatzi.

N: So sorry about that? Ring is a Jungfrau [1] who tends to get a bit more nervous around cute girls.

Wearing an amiable smile as he faced me, Nika lifted the heavy air around us.

Kate: Jung…?

Ring: Y-you don’t have to ask what it is! …And also, it’s not like I’m nervous.

R: But, I won’t deny… that you are… cute…

He was simply cautious around me; it was not as though he was really doing me any harm for now.

…Even so, though, I myself had become ever so slightly anxious.

(The members of Vogel are also Cursed, if I recall, right…)

(If they had such intentions, they could easily take my life.)

The fear that I had first felt when I started working for Crown started to paint over my heart, when…

Darius: …Are you nervous, by any chance?

Donning a childlike innocence, Darius looked into my face.

Kate: Ah… umm…

Darius: Well, well… if we did possess a strong ability much like Sir Rex…

D: I wouldn’t blame you for feeling powerless even while simply conversing.

D: But you can relax around us. My ability will not kill you.

D: ——In fact, there is absolutely no way it will. Okay?

Nica: Oh, me and my brother’s abilities aren’t really harmful too.

N: That said, it can probably make you feel really good and maybe make you feel a bit fuzzy, but that’s actually a good thing, isn’t it?

Kate: R-right…

(Just what ability does that entail…?)

Although I still held my doubts, I knew that their abilities didn’t pose a danger to my life, which ebbed my fear.

Darius: Now then, now that you know we mean you no harm, how about we partake in these?

With Darius’ encouragement, Ring quickly reached out to a cake in front of him.

Ring: Mm…! This is really good.

Taking large bites, the cake was gone before I knew it, and Ring then reached out for another snack.

Nica: Geez, Ring, why are you just taking whatever’s in front of you? Pick the ones that especially look good.

While saying so, Nica reached for a baked pastry diagonal of him.

Nica: I recognize this shape. Isn’t this from the high-class bakery near the castle?

Kate: I’m surprised you know of it! That shop——

Nica: Mn… hm? It’s good, but did it really come from that shop?

Kate: Well, what I wanted to say was that shop’s pastry shapes were the inspiration for these homemade sweets.

That said, this time, Victor and I did make our rounds around a variety of bakeries, and put this together.

And I tried to make homemade pastries here at the castle that were freshly made or were hard to obtain.

Nica: They’re ‘homemade’? So they’re basically cheap foods, in which case I don’t want any.

Kate: Eh—

Nica: Here, Ring, say ‘ahh.’

Nica pushed his half eaten pastry into Ring’s mouth.

Ring: Mn… this is also really good…

When he was eating it, Nica said it was ‘good,’ but maybe he’s actually not good with homemade pastries…?

Darius: Hey, miss fairytale keeper, this is Baumkuchen [2], isn’t it?

This time, Darius called out to me while pulling on my sleeve.

Kate: That’s right. We figured since you’re here, we could prepare some German pastries… or that’s what Victor said.

Darius: Ho-oh…

Darius used a knife to lightly cut a slice before he carried it to my mouth.

Darius: Here, have a bite?

Kate: Mn… mmm, it’s really fluffy and delicious!

Darius: I’m glad to hear. Then it’s my turn.

With layers of the Baumkuchen spilling, Darius brought it to his mouth.

Darius: Mm, it’s delicious. …But, I take it it’s not something made in most of England. So where did you get this?

Kate: Actually, while I was racking my head on how to make Baumkuchen…

K: Victor made a gadget that could make it.

In order to make a delicious Baumkuchen by the tea party, I practiced baking it day in and day out.

…I feel that I can keep the fact that for some time the castle’s snacks consisted of nothing but Baumkuchen to myself.

Darius: He made a whole gadget just for this? Hmm… he’s quite strange, I’d say.

Kate: I can’t argue with that… but I’m sure it’s just that he was happy.

K: Happy that you guys, who are also Cursed, have come to England——or rather, to Crown.

Darius: …The pleasure is ours. I’m delighted at how warmly we’re treated here.

D: I do like the Baumkuchen, so do make it again sometime.

Kate: Alright!

I was so glad he liked it that I gave an immediate answer, but…

(Making it is quite time consuming and requires skill… but I’ll try my best.)

Nica: This topic’s all well and good, but what I really want to hear about the Spatzi [3] herself.

N: You know, like what fragrances you like, or which types of guys you fancy, that kind of thing… what about you, Ring?

Ring: Mngh…!? U-uhm…

R: ………M-maybe, like, which color of the sky she most likes?

Nica: The sophistication’s lacking, I see.

Ring: And what’s the problem with that?

Darius: I do agree with Nika here though. I would also like to get to know you better.

D: But simply asking would be a bore, so how about we play a guessing game?

Nica: So, Ratespiel? Now we’re talking.

Darius: Let’s make it so each person can make a single guess, and until then, we can continue asking questions…

D: Come play with us, why don’t you, miss fairytale keeper?

D: If possible… I would prefer you choose a topic that pertains to yourself.

Kate: Alright, then…

K: Out of the foods on this table, which one is my most favorite?

Darius: Hehe, that’s quite a charming topic? Then let’s start.

Nica: Sounds good to me, though I’d like to propose another twist.

N: The first person to guess the correct answer will be able to ask the Spatzi out on a date. Well, how about it?

Ring: A date…!? [surprised]

Darius: You do make a good point. A competition does call for a prize of sorts… well, miss fairytale keeper? Are you fine with this?

Kate: U-um, I think a date may be a bit——

When I tried to speak up, though, the three of them looked at me, causing my breath to catch in my throat.

Ring was looking at me with a guarded look, as though he were a guard dog who could tear my neck apart with a single order.

Nica was looking at me with a scrutinizing look, as though he was thinking about how to play with a toy.

And Darius was wearing an amiable smile, but his eyes alone were sharp, like that of a predator aiming for its prey——

With the three of them looking at me in their own way, I couldn’t bring myself to disagree, feeling myself surrounded by a heavy air.

Darius: ‘I think a date may be a bit’ what was that now?

Kate: …Nope, never mind. That works for me.

Overwhelmed by the pressure, I could only nod, and Darius returned the gesture with an angelic smile.

Like a signal, the tense atmosphere became more lax.

Darius: Thank you. Then, let the game start.

With that, the tea party proceeded such that Darius, Nika, and Ring asked me questions.

While the discussion occasionally went off track, this peaceful time continued to pass by——

Ring: I got it!

The one who had his answer ready first was Ring.

Darius: A friendly reminder that you only have one chance. If you miss the mark, that will be the end… are you sure you would like to answer?

Ring: Don’t worry, I’m sure of this.

R: The answer is——that fruit before your eyes!

Kate: …Miss.

Ring: Wh…!? I-I see… so it was wrong…

Ring looked a bit despondent at my answer, and though he looked like a guard dog before, in an instant, he looked more like an abandoned puppy,

and I had to desperately fight the urge to say ‘actually, it’s a hit.’

Nica: …Hey, Ring. Mind if I say how you got to your answer?

Ring: ‘How I got to my answer’?

Nica: When you were about to grab that fruit, the Spatzi said ‘go ahead’ to you with a smile and put it on your plate,

N: and so you held a positive association with that fruit, leading you to your answer?

Ring: N-now that you mention it… that might’ve been the case… it was completely unconscious…

Darius: Ahaha, you’re so adorably honest, Ring.

Nica: Well then, it’s about time I guess too. The correct answer is… this chocolate.

N: It’s a bit on the mini side, and it looks cute too, and not to mention the packaging is also intricate. It practically oozes the traits a girl would like.

Kate: Miss.

Nica: Oops, too bad.

As opposed to Ring, who seemed down upon getting his guess wrong, Nika didn’t show any signs of caring, even if he did.

It was as though he knew from the beginning his answer was wrong.

Darius: I would prefer you make a serious guess, or this game will really end up in a bore.

Nica: But I thought long and hard about what girls would like and picked based on that?

N: Besides, this is where a subordinate hands the torch to the master.

Nika gave a smug wink, and Darius shrugged his shoulders in response.

Darius: It seems I bear a great responsibility now. If I’m unable to answer correctly, I’m afraid the little miss fairytale keeper——

D: And Crown as well would be disappointed in me.

Kate: Don’t worry, I won’t be disappointed even if you don’t answer correctly. It’s just a game, after all.

Darius: Hmm, so you believe I won’t get the answer right, is that it?

Kate: That…

(If I’m being completely honest, yes, I did think that.)

(Because the answer to this question is… a bit special.)

Darius: Hehe, seeing you have such low expectations of me makes me want to try my utmost hardest.

D: Alright, I have my answer.

D: I see you were trying not to eat this chocolate cake, right?

D: Because you like it, you saved it for last, I take it. So, my answer is that chocolate cake.

I was about to reply with an immediate ‘miss,’ when he opened his mouth before me.

Darius: …is what a normal person would say, but that would be incorrect.

Kate: Eh…

Darius: The answer to your question is——-

D: ‘Everything here on the table.’

Kate: …That’s a hit.

Ring: A-all of it…!? Is that answer even possible?

Nica: Well, we never established that the said thing had to just be a single thing, so yeah, it’s fully possible.

N: But even so, way to bend the rules there, Spatzi. I didn’t think you had it in you.

N: …You really are an interesting one, aren’t you.

Darius: I did think it was a strange answer, but considering the little miss fairytale keeper’s character, it wasn’t too difficult.

D: Perhaps you thought something like, ‘If I’m preparing something for guests, I would choose the things I believe are the most delicious’… am I right?

Kate: It is as you say…

While consulting with Victor, I chose all of the pastries here.

So, that’s why if I were to choose my most favorite among these, the answer would naturally be ‘everything.’

Kate: It was a bit of an underhanded answer, so I didn’t think you would get it.

Darius: Hehe, but I did. Oh, but, I don’t think it’s underhanded.

D: After all, I take it you thought up of such an answer so that you didn’t have to assign winners and losers, yes?

Kate: Yes, there was also that. Since it was such a fun tea party, I didn’t want to label anyone as winners and losers…

Darius: To see you try to put us on an equal footing without assigning a winner…

D: You truly are sweet to the point it’s cloying… and kind as well.

Ring: B-by the way… will Darius ask her out? O-on a date, that is…!

Darius: Ahh, that nearly slipped my mind. Well, miss fairytale keeper, will you go out on a date with me next time?

Kate: …I will.

I didn’t have much reason to turn him down, and now that I got to talk with them like this, I started to become more interested in the members of Vogel.

(…And going out together with them seems pretty fun too.)

Nica: Okay, then, when you’re done with your date with Dari, let me know, okay? We can plan a date of our own then.

Kate: Eh—

Nica: The prize for the game was the right to ask you out on a date, but there’s no need to hinge something like that on a game, right?

N: Besides, if the answer to the question is ‘everything on the table,’ that would technically make my answer right, too, yeah?

Kate: I… guess so…?

Nica: And you caught my interest too anyway…

N: …Ah, that’s right. Since we’re talking about this, why don’t you invite the Spatzi on a date too, Ring?

Ring: O-on a date…!? I… I’ll pass.

R: …But when you go on your date with Nica and Darius, I’ll tag along behind you guys.

Nica: Wait, why though?

Ring: If she’s around, you’ll let your guards down and lose sight of your surroundings, right?

R: So I’ll cover those bases during your date.

Nica: Ehh…

Darius: Hehe, thank you, Ring.

D: …Hey, miss fairytale keeper. I must say that half a day isn’t nearly enough.

D: Why don’t we take our sweet time chatting on our date, the two of us?

A smile played on Darius’ lips, and I couldn’t look away from his honey-colored eyes.

Just then, I remembered Victor’s words from before I went out.

—— Flashback ——

Victor: Ahh, that’s right, Kate. There’s one thing I should say.

V: If you wish to return to your normal everyday life after this month passes… you mustn’t let your heart get stolen by them.

—— End flashback ——

(It’ll be alright… I think I was able to enjoy this time today when I tried talking to them.)

(This feeling won’t blossom into love. Surely…)

Fin.

will vs darius jude vs nica alfons vs ring

NOTES:

[0] according to our handy google translate, the title of this story, Liebe geht durch den Magen, translates to “love goes through the stomach.” I assume this may reference or be the equivalent to a similar English saying, “the way to one’s heart is through their stomach.”

[1] “virgin” in German nhdkshfds

[2] and here we have a quote from Wikipedia: Baumkuchen is a kind of spit cake from German cuisine. It is also a popular dessert in Japan. The characteristic rings that appear in its slices resemble tree rings, and give the cake its German name, Baumkuchen, which literally translates to “tree cake” or “log cake”.

[3] originally, I had Rotkehlchen, which is like the literal translation for “robin” as far as I know. Spatzi means “sparrow,” but can be used as a term of endearment in the same way the Crown members call Kate “robin” out of endearment. In his collection story event, he mentions that the word he used is German for robin, but it could be localized to something like “it is a German-equivalent term of endearment for robin.” Thanks to @.citrusmornings for providing this link!

END NOTES: did you enjoy this story? because i know i did, haha. i really enjoy all the vogel characters so far; they all have interesting personalities, and they bounce off each other in a fun way as well.

honestly, i’m still trying to sort of get an idea of how i want to sort of translate and write these characters. overall, though, i tried to give darius a more innocent air, with some hints of his nobility, while also having a strong sort of presence. and i tried to capture nica’s sort of casual and flippant (but also clever and sharp) air, which contrasts with how ring gets shy and flustered pretty easily.

i’d love to hear your thoughts!

full masterlist 🕊️

[chanandlersstuff]

Little Miss Director and Starboy.

Pairing: Hayden Christensen x Reader.

Summary: The timeline of how Hayden gradually fell in love with her until he was madly in love, to the point of no returning.

Word count: 8.457

Warnings: Not much actually, age-gap and a slow burn.

Author’s note: It’s the first time I write something about Hayden so I hope you like it. I have nothing against his private life nor his love ones, this is just for fun. With that been said, I had this idea in my head for a long time and it will have two more parts.

gif credits @haydenchristensengifs

Next Part →

May 2019, first meetings.

When he was offered the role of Anakin again for Obi-Wan’s series, he jumped in without thinking twice and that’s how he met her. He saw her face for the first time on a tiny screen on his phone. The first few things he noticed about her were that she used glasses, her voice was sweet, that she smiled pretty much all the time and that she was young, several years younger than him.

She was very polite and enthusiastic, telling him all about the ideas for the series and explaining everything about the project. Maybe revealing a few things she shouldn’t but he didn’t care. She kept it professional but light, which he thanked because acting formally in the comfort of his house while wearing joggers and slippers was a no can do.

A few weeks after that he hopped in a plane and flew all the way to the studios, where she worked, to meet with her and talk about the project. He was directed to her office, where she was supposed to be expecting him but she wasn’t. “I’m sorry Mr. Christensen, but she will arrive in a few minutes.” The boy behind the desk said with a polite smile. “Please follow me.” He got up and walked towards an office at the end of the hallway. “You can wait for her in her office.” He opened the door. “Feel free to get comfortable.” The boy smiled. “Would you like something to drink?”

Hayden looked around the room, it was big; but not too big, painted white with big windows that let all the light enter and a little sofa with a desk in the middle. “No, thank you.” But the main thing he noticed was the lack of personal things in it. No photos on the desk, instead, little drawings stuck to the computer and an old video camera from the ‘90s on one of the shelves, which he found odd. 

He stood watching the window and how the sun illuminated everything around. A couple of minutes passed by when he heard voices outside the office. “Hi, Charlie, how are you?” The same sweet voice reached his ears. Some muffled words and the sound of boots against the floor. "What? He's in there?” She whispered-shouted. “He's early!” It was true, Hayden was early. A trait he picked up from his father. "I know!" The boy at the reception whispered-shouted too. "He’s cute.” Hayden smiled a little at the words. “Charlie! Unprofessional.” It wasn’t as if he was eavesdropping, they just happened to be speaking not so quietly. “I’m not ready.”  He heard her say. “Yes, you are.” The boy encouraged her. More muffled sounds reached his ear. “Fake it, till you make it.” He smiled at the phrase and moments later the door was opened.

He turned around and she was there with a nervous smile on her lips, not like the ones he saw on Facetime. “Hi.” She said, blushing a little.

The brunette walked closer to greet her properly. “Hello.”

“Wow, you are tall.” She said rapidly under her breath, but he heard it, making him laugh.

“I got that a lot.” He extended his hand and she shook it. To the list of things he noticed about her, he added that her hands were cold, despite the warm weather outside, and full of small classy silver rings. She apologised about it but he was focused on looking at her. She was small, a little smaller than average, barely reaching his chin. Dressed in black Doc Martens, light colour jeans, a fitted black t-shirt and a red leather coat. Long straight hair and no glasses on. 

She hung her bag and coat and smiled at him, a more natural one. “Can I offer you something? Tea? Coffee? Orange Juice?”

“A tea would be nice, thank you.” She nodded and ordered Charlie, the boy behind the desk at the front, a tea and a coffee.

“Shall we?” She gestured to the sofa for them to sit down.

He tilted his head to the side. “By all means, it’s your office.” He let her walk in front of him, as the gentleman he was taught to be.

She looked around with a tiny smile on her lips. “Yeah, I still don’t believe it.” 

“You have a beautiful view.” He added.

“Yeah, doesn't it?” She asked happily and looked around. “First of all," he was the object of her gaze again. "thank you for coming all the way here just to chat about this.” 

“Not at all, it’s a pleasure. And far easier than talking on the phone.” He sat more comfortably.

She laughed and nodded. “I like this kind of human contact, I feel like there’s nothing left to guess, or misunderstood, and I also believe it is more personal.” He agreed, noticing she moved her leg nervously. Another thing to add to his list about her. “I will try to not occupy much of your time and don’t bore you.” She joked.

But he shook his head “No, nothing of that.” trying to reassure her. 

A knock on the door interrupted him. “Sorry.” She got up and opened the door. Charlie entered with the two cups and left them on the desk. “Thank you very much, Charlie.” The boy smiled and walked away. “Sugar? Sweetener?” She offered him.

“Sugar, it's fine.” She passed him the little packets while she poured a little one of sweeteners into her cup. The pleased smile on her lips, when she took the first sip, would always be tattooed on his mind.

Hayden asked the normal things about the project and she told him everything she could about it. Slowly, bit by bit, he saw how she was more nervous-free and how excited she was for all the things she was telling him about. “But it’s still in diapers, we are still figuring things out. I’m still figuring things out.” She played with her hands. “The writers started putting everything on paper and I’m working with the executive producers about the cast.” She ended with a smile.

“It’s your first big project?” He asked, taking a sip of his tea. She laughed a little, moving her head side to side, it wasn’t a yes but neither a no. “How old are you?” That was a question he had in mind for a while and hoped it didn't sound rude.

“Twenty-seven.” He raised his eyebrows, surprised. “I know, too young and very big, immense, shoes to fill.” She said with a bored tone like she got that too much. 

Hayden shook his head. “I was 19 when I took the role of Anakin and felt the same way. Everything is going to be fine.” She looked at him a little unsure. “If they choose you to be here, it’s because you are the best. Don’t let them intimidate you, otherwise they will eat you alive.”

She smiled at him, big and brightly. “Thank you, Hayden, truly.” Her eyes accompanied the smile, kind and truthful.

All of a sudden, he turned shy by being under her gaze- What? Shy? Come on man. -so he shrugged and changed the subject. Trying for his life to not blush at how sincere and kind her eyes looked at him moments prior.

October 2019, surprise surprise.

By the second time they met in person, they had been talking a couple more times by the phone, she asked a few things about what he felt about Anakin, what were his thoughts about him and things like that.

Hayden was walking towards her office, for some reason he wanted to see her before going to meet with the writers, executives and a few of the characters for the first reading of the script, which was going to take a few days, to see if everything was going according to plan, smoothly. 

He entered the office and Charlie was there, sitting behind the desk, just like all those months before. They made small talk while the boy accompanied him to her office. When he opened the door, she was looking down at some papers on the desk and her hair was up supported by a pen. “Perfect, Charlie, sorry to bother you, but I'' Who apologised to his assistant for asking something? Always so polite.

When she looked up, her eyes opened big in surprise at seeing him. Hayden realised she was wearing the glasses she wore when they first met and that with the light entering the room her eyes shined. Maybe it was my presence? No, it couldn’t be. It was 100% the light, for sure. “Hello.” He said with a kind smile on his lips.

“Hi.” She smiled brightly, just like she usually did. Usually as in the two times he saw her, one in person and the other by a screen. “You are early.” She looked at the watch on her right wrist.

“Again.” He joked earning a laugh from her.

“Please, make yourself comfortable.” She pointed at the sofa where he sat months ago, a vase with white jasmines on the little table there. “Tea?” He nodded and when she was about to ask Charlie the boy nodded and walked away with a tiny smile on his lips.

He, for sure, made himself comfortable and started walking around the office. It didn’t seem empty as it did before, now it had books on the shelves; a few more drawings, it was more cosy, and the same video camera was still there on one of the shelves. He traced it with his finger, slowly, trying to not damage it. “That camera was the thing that started everything, it was my father’s but I made it mine.” Her sweet voice became sweeter.

“It was your first camera?” He turned around to look at her and she nodded with a smile on her lips. Was she always smiling?

“I used to record everything around me with it.” The papers on her desk were long forgotten. “Everything that made me happy, to never forget it.”

He smiled at her way of seeing things. “You still do?”

She hummed. “From time to time, when I’m utterly, incandescently, happy.” He was about to comment on that but she interrupted him. “Besides, vintage makes everything look good.” She laughed and he did too.

Charlie entered right when their laughs were in sync and their eyes shined. “Your tea, Mr. Christensen.” The boy left the drink on the small table there and walked away with a smirk on his lips.

“Are you ready for today?” With a few strikes, he sat on the sofa facing her. She nodded, biting her lips, while arranging the stacks of papers on her desk. He was about to comment on something about her nervous behaviour but chose against it, afraid of making her more nervous. “Did you eat something?” She shook her head. “You want me to grab you a coffee or something?”

She looked up to him. The same kind eyes of all those months back were looking at him “No, thank you.” and shook her head. “If I drink coffee now I’m afraid I will not be able to sit still on the reading table.” A little laugh escaped his lips and the same shyness, and blush, from months ago, appeared again making him clear his throat. Get it together.

With small talk, his attempt to take her mind out of what was about to happen, the time had passed and they had to go to meet the rest to do the first reading table. They exited the office and, as the gentleman he was, he offered to carry all the papers in her hands, but she refused it. Claiming that she was more than capable of doing it herself.

For the first time since he saw her that day, he paid attention to her whole outfit and it was much more formal than the one she used the first day they met. Little heels that made her reach his mouth, black tights, a skirt with a little cut on the side that fitted quite well and a black shirt with the first two buttons undone. And she smelled like jasmine, like the ones in her office.

They reached the room where everything was going to unfold and she stopped a few meters from the door. “You okay?” Hayden asked her and she nodded. “You need a minute?” She nodded again and he gave it to her, even took a step back and let her gather her strength.

The brunette watched her take a few deep breaths and move her head from side to side. “Okay, you got this.” He heard her mumble and a smile appeared on his lips. After a few seconds, she turned around and looked at him. “Ready when you are,” she joked.

He got closer to her laughing, “Ready.” She nodded and he held the door for her to enter first, he walked after her.

Ewan was already there, the executives and the three writers too. The two long-time friends hugged each other and caught up for a few minutes. “Have you already met our amazing, incredible, director?” The Scottish man asked.

“Yes, I had the pleasure,” Hayden said, looking around for her. She was standing by his side moments ago and now she wasn’t.

“She’s amazing, I have been working with her since the beginning and I promise you are going to be blown away by her.” Ewan was more excited by all that was happening than any of them. 

“I have not a single doubt,” his eyes found her in the mess of people and a smile appeared on his lips.

Four days of the same routine, Hayden would arrive every day a little earlier than the prior just to sit in her office and talk to her. Some days Charlie would have a tea already in the making for him and others he would carry a coffee with a chocolate muffin in hand for her because she tended to not eat.

And his list of things he noticed about her would keep getting longer. Her favourite colour was red, she had a sweet tooth, and jasmines and yellow daffodils were her favourite flowers, she used normal glasses when her eyes got irritated after using lenses all the time; plus according to her, they added dramatic effect when she was stressed, she was left-handed, that she scrunched her nose, but her brows didn’t frown, when she didn’t like something and that she truly, and naturally, was a smiley person. All the things he noticed weren’t personal stuff, she was pretty reserved and he could resemble her about that.

It was the last day of the reading table and truth be told, the script was garbage. It was the same thing as the series that were already being streamed. All those days, and hours spent were futile, the ones he had to be seated at that table, not the ones he was seated on the sofa in her office. They all tried to bring something to the table for the script to work, but it was useless. Everyone knew it and someone had to rip the bandaid off. 

“Well...” the executive producer began, “thoughts?” And they all looked at her.

As if she could feel all the gazes on her, she looked up. “Sincerely?” And they nodded. She looked around the room, Hayden could see her demeanour changed as if she had built a wall inside her and was ready for anything. “It’s the same thing we saw billions of times.” She was straightforward. “If we keep this way, the critic is going to smash us.” She voiced what all of them were thinking.

“Excuse me?” One of the writers said.

She frowned, “we are making a series about an icon of the cinematography universe, whose story is tightly intertwined with one of the biggest villains of history, about a universe that changed lives and the way of seeing cinema and this script-” she picked it up “does not reflect that.” The nervous girl Hayden saw before was left at the door and seated with him was a decisive woman, with her work pants well put on and a clear idea in mind. "This script is too small for a production as big as this one, as awaited as this one."

“And what would you know about making a script for a production this big?” The writer looked at her up and down. “You are just a child, you are too small a director for a production like this.” All the people in the room were surprised at such harsh, disrespectful, words. “Little Miss Director.” He added with a derogatory tone.

Ewan and Hayden were ready to chime in, along with a few other people on the crew, but she beat them to it. “First of all, you are excused.” She raised her chin and sat straight. “Second, I formed myself, I studied and improved after every project I made, it didn't matter how little it was.” Long was gone the sweet tone she carried. “I'm worthy of being here, believe me, I am one of the best out there and I have the skills to direct this project.” She had a cold look in her eyes. “If this is your script, which I guess it is, by how offended you are getting at hearing my honest opinion, maybe it’s you who does not know about big productions.” 

The silence that fell upon the room was a sepulchral one, not even a fly flew around. She kept her gaze on the writer until he stormed off the room, followed by a bang from the door. They all looked that way, but Hayden kept his eyes on her and caught the moment when she let go of a shaky breath and played with one of the many rings on her fingers. Their eyes connected and he frowned, asking a silent question, but she just gave him a small smile, reassuring him she was fine. 

After apologies from the executive producers and the writers on behalf of the rude partner, they all agreed with her that the script was awful and that she was right. Ideas came and went but nothing seemed to fit and be worthy of, the concept they had in mind. “You worked as a writer too for the projects you were on, didn't you?" Ewan asked, looking at her. "Besides, directing them.”

She narrowed her eyes. “Yes…” 

“They were very good, award-worthy.” He added making her open her eyes big, Hayden frowned. But when she was going to answer, the Scottish talked again. “Why don’t you write something?”

She seemed caught off guard, Hayden watched how her lips parted a little and her eyes scanned the room, while Ewan had a kind smile on his lips. After all, he was one of the executive producers and he had that kind of power at the table. “Yeah, we will meet in a couple of months and we will discuss it again.” Another executive producer said.

She looked even more surprised, her brows a little more raised than before. “We can work with you, discuss ideas and build the story together.” One of the writers said while the other nodded eagerly. “We will help each other and it would be an honour for us.”

A smile appeared on her lips, but Hayden realised it was a nervous one; not like the ones he saw her make when she took a sip of her coffee, or when she talked about the video camera in her office. “Yeah, okay.” The confident woman who put the idiot writer in his place was gone and the same nervous girl who was left outside the room appeared again. “We can do that. There are a few ideas in here that we can use as a base and build upon them.” She nodded looking at the script as if it was going grow a mouth and eat her alive

The meeting finished after a few minutes and they talked about schedules for the future, which was uncertain until the scripts were ready. When Hayden got up to talk to her she was already on her way to walk away from the room, like her life depended on it, and was left to talk with Ewan, not that he didn’t like catching up with his friend, but if he was honest, he was a little worried about her.

January 2020, first vestiges of emotions.

The last time the pair saw each other they couldn't even have the chance to say goodbye because when Hayden went to her office to talk to her, Charlie told him she was already gone for the day and he was flying back to Canada in a few hours. He weighed the options of calling her, or sending her a text, to ask if everything was fine but in the end, he desisted, to not come up as dense. 

To his surprise, she texted him a few weeks after their last encounter, a simple hello, sorry to bother you, and presenting herself, as if he didn’t know who she was. All that to talk about work, about the script she, and the other writers, were working on.

Finally, it was time to see them, the team, in person. To see her in person. Their routine was picked up where they left it, him taking her a coffee and muffin and a hot tea waiting for him at her desk, and, of course, he arrived early. 

“Hello, Charlie,” Hayden said as soon as he passed the door from his office floor. 

“Hello, Mr. Christensen,” The boy said, despite the multiple times he told him to call him by his name and not that formal title. “She will arrive shortly, you can come in,” Charlie said with a smile on his lips. “You already know the way.” 

Laughing a little, he walked towards her office. There were new drawings on the shelves, still no photos, the video camera was still in place and the smell of jasmine was still there. The sticky posts on the computer were there and despite all his mother's teachings that what he was going to do was impolite, he did it. Slowly he walked to the other side of her desk and readed them. 'Most Ardently’ was writing in one of them with a little heart and clear handwriting, ‘Shine on, you crazy diamond. Love, the kids and I’ that one made him frown. She was married with kids? The kids would explain all the drawings, but she never mentioned anything about kids when he talked about his daughter, and the married thing was hard to guess with all the rings she had on her fingers. She never said anything about being taken, nor had any photos in her office with someone, and she was a very closed person, so he was not going to pray into her private life if she didn’t let anything on. 

And like months ago, when they first met, he heard her sweet voice in the hallway talking with Charlie and it went almost the same way it did the first time, him being cute wasn’t said that time. 

“Hi, Hayden.” She said as soon as she opened the door. When he looked at her he had to suppress a laugh that was about to escape his lips. “What?” She was frowning at him.

His eyes trailed her up and down. “You are under all that?” She was small, that much was a fact, but she looked so much smaller under the, almost, total black outfit she was wearing. A big ass long coat, loose high dress pants, a fitted t-shirt that covered her up to her neck and white Converse, that looked like they were from his daughter from how small they seemed.

“Well yeah.” She took the sunglasses off her head and a few rebel hairs fell to her face making her blow them away. Her silver rings and silver necklace with her initials contrasted with her clothes. “I’m cold.”

“I can see that,” he laughed while walking to greet her. It came naturally to him to kiss her cheek followed by a little. “Hello.” The smell of jasmine invaded him and his voice sounded deeper for some reason. When he moved away, the brunette took notice of how her cheeks and nose were red from the cold. Was it from the cold though? “Are you that cold?”

“Huh?” She frowned like she didn’t understand. “Ah, yeah.” She nodded, and a nervous laugh escaped her lips. 

Charlie interrupted them carrying his tea while she hung her coat and got comfortable. The little interaction was forgotten by the time the boy walked out of the office with a frown on his face, looking at his boss. “I brought you breakfast,” Hayden said pointing at the cup next to her keyboard.

She smiled kindly at him, but that smile changed when she took a sip of the hot drink. It wasn’t a bad change, it was a good one. The way her lips curved gave him flashbacks of the memory tattooed on his brain about the first time he met her in person. He wasn’t afraid of messing up her coffee order, he knew it was the right one because he had picked it up on the few times they had been together.

She seemed less nervous this time around, there weren’t stacks of papers on her desk like the last time, nor she wasn’t running around. She seemed grounded, confident even. He tried to get information out of her about the new scripts but it was impossible, she gave him vague answers with a polite smile on her face, which made him laugh. “You are getting better at this,” he took a sip of his tea, looking at her.

“I know,” she smiled smugly. “I've been taking notes on how not to spill everything about a new project.” The brunette noticed how proud she looked about that. “I wouldn’t want them to fire me for speaking too much,” her tone was a playful one.

He laughed. “They would never,” his eyebrows were frowned and he shook his head. “Not after all the work you’ve done,” he reassured her.

Between sips of hot drinks, Hayden told her about his farm in Canada, about Briar Rose and small things here and there about his life while she listened attentively to all his words. The morning sun entering from the window behind her, seated at his side, added some kind of soft, cosy, effect to the office. Intimate. While they were laughing about something he said, a knock on the door behind him interrupted them. “Come in,” she called, still laughing.

“Hello there,” an accent Hayden recognized very well reached his ears and she started laughing again.

The brunette turned around and standing there was Ewan with a smile on his face. “Obi-Wan,” the pair said, making the Scottish laugh too.

“Good to see you two here.” They all hugged each other. “I was coming to pick our beloved director up but you beat me to it,” he joked looking at him.

Immediately she blushed. “We are having breakfast, would you like something?” She asked in her sweet tone.

“No, no. Nothing darling, thank you.” The trio stood in the middle of the office. “Are you ready?” Ewan asked and Hayden looked at her too.

She nodded, “Yeah, everything’s ready. The scripts are already arranged in the room where we are going to meet, the seats are designated.”

“You are well prepared then,” Ewan said surprised. “Yeah, you seemed more ready than last time when you were running around like crazy until the last minutes,” Hayden added. If his eyes weren’t on her, he would have seen the look in his dear friend's eyes.

“Well, I've had everything ready for like a week or so,” she shrugged but the pair looked at her surprised. “What? I like having things in order,” she defended herself.

It was time for them to meet with the rest of the crew so they walked out of the office, her first, and made their way there. The two men told her about the funny things they remembered while they filmed the first two movies and the technology they had to do it. 

Hayden noticed that she seemed much more carefree this time around than the first time they did the table reading, she didn’t stop at the door to take a deep breath, nor to give herself a little pep talk. She just entered the room like she owned it, like she deserved to be there, which she did, and that made him smile.

Just as she said, the table already had the scripts on it and tags in front of the chairs, it was a completely different room than the one they were months ago. There were different people inside, who were supposed to be the cast, the writers, the executive producers and them. “Ready boys?” She asked with a smile on her lips making them look at each other with their eyebrows raised and they laughed, but followed her nonetheless. 

They all sat around the big circular table, the writers at her sides, while he Ewan, and the rest of the team, dispersed around the table. The crew was also there, seated surrounding them. The reading started but her sweet voice didn’t chime in at any moment, Hayden watched her make notes here and there on her script and whispered with the writers beside her.

They connected eyes more than a few times, she always caught him looking at her for some reason, only a couple of times it was the other way around like they could feel their gaze on each other. Her reaction was always the same, a sweet smile on her lips. Her hair was held by a pen, again, and at some point, she put her glasses on. This time around she didn’t play much with her rings, but she did it with the silver delicate watch on her wrist. 

He looked around the table to watch the crew's reaction and they all had mixed emotions, but they were the exact opposite of what that rubbish script generated. By the time the reading ended, everyone was silent with unreadable looks on their faces. But she was in her world, still making notes. Almost three minutes passed when someone decided to speak. “Well,” Ewan broke the silence, from his tone he could guess, because he had his blue eyes fixed on her, that he was smiling. “Little Miss Director did it again.” She raised her head looking at him.

And looked around the table confused, suspiciously. “Meaning?” Her tone was so unsure, he found it cute.

“It’s brilliant, this is excellent.” One of the producers said.

Everyone chimed in to praise the script, the cast; the crew; and every single person in the room. Hayden watched at how her face broke into a beautiful big grin, eyes shining and cheeks blushed. Her eyes connected with his and he grinned too, that was the effect of her smile. 

The session was over and everybody stood up to leave, and this time she didn’t run away instead stood chatting with whoever approached her. “Didn't I tell you she was brilliant?” Ewan said, clapping his shoulder.

“Yeah, you did.” He nodded and his friend looked pleased. “It’s one of the best scripts I have ever read, well written; well articulated; balanced. It's amazing.” Hayden was speechless at how creative she was, at how amazing she was.

Ewan nodded proudly. “I knew from the moment I watched one of her films that she was perfect for the series, that’s why I recommended her for the position.” He raised his eyebrows, surprised. “Plus, her resume is impeccable. She's something else.” The brunette nodded with his eyes fixed on her. “Totally worthy of being showrunner.” Hayden looked at him surprised. “She didn’t tell you?”

He shook his head. “She doesn't talk much when we are together, I do most of it, plus she’s very private.”

“Yeah she is, it took me a while for her to trust me but she would eventually open up,” his friend tried to reassure him. “If she trusts you,” he added, clapping his back laughing. 

Hayden shook his head, “thanks man.” Ewan laughed harder.

“She reminds me of you a little bit when we first met,” the Scottish said and he looked at him frowning. “Incredibly passionate young soul, keen and very creative." 

Hayden smiled at the kind words of his dear friend and found it more special that he found such touching words related to her. He was about to respond when she walked towards them.

"Good job, Little Miss Director." Ewan joked when he saw her.

She laughed tilting her head back but did a little bow, Hayden smiled. "Thank you, Ewan." He bowed his head. "Truly for your trust and help in this process."

He smiled, "It was my pleasure darling." And they hugged.

When they parted, she looked at Hayden with a big smile too. He felt shy under her gaze but enjoyed it too. "Thank you too, Hayden." He shook his head. "For being patient with me and all my questions, helping me and your encouraging words."

Sweetly, as her voice, she hugged him. Engulfed him with her arms around his neck, she was on her tiptoes and he had to bend down a little to put his arms around her back, not her waist because he was respectful. The jasmine scent, her scent, reached his nose making him dizzy. His mouth was so close to her neck, to her pulse point, that if he moved his head a little to the right he would graced it with his lips and he felt her hot breath in his pulse point, making him weak on the knees.

The hug ended far too quickly for his liking. What? When they pulled apart he had to clear his throat and blinked a couple of times. Fucks sake, Hayden, get a hold of yourself. You are 38 and she’s 11 years younger than you, think straight.

February 2020, special day.

It had been a couple of months since he last saw her, which he was thankful about because the hug she gave him was too much for him. Too much for his brain. Too much for his heart. Too fucking much.

He thought that maybe the peace of his farm would give him the clarity he needed but it didn't happen. Not a single clear thought about whatever he was feeling came his way. About work? Yes. About what he was going to eat for dinner? Lots. About feelings, which were a mess? Not a single one.

Ewan and he were talking on the phone about life, making a habit of staying in contact and not like the last decade and a couple of years. They were talking about projects and life, while all Hayden’s brain was screaming was, Ask him about her. ASK HIM! but he tried to not let that part of him win. 

Obviously was futile because he ended up talking about work, which of course ended up with her name being said. “You know anything about her?” He shut his eyes and frowned, with his free hand he pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Yeah, I talked on the phone with her a couple of days ago. Something about the script.” His friend said and he nodded.

“How was she?” The words blurted out his mouth before he had the time to process them. He was seconds away from smashing his head through the wall if that made him stop thinking about her. Teenage behaviour, right there Hayden. The laughter on the other side of the phone made him shake his head, regretting asking. 

“Fascinated by our Little Miss Director I see.” Ewan teased and he had to hum because if he opened his mouth the teasing would meet no end. “I get it, she’s pretty awesome.”

“Yes, she is.” Well, fuck it, he would embarrass himself for shits and giggles.

The days after his chat with Ewan, where he mentioned her resume, he could have Googled her, to know what his friend meant, but he decided against it. The opportunity, the privilege, of hearing about her life from her mouth would be more rewarding, more special, than reading it on some gossip page.

Ewan laughed again. “It’s her birthday in a couple of days.” His ears perked when his friend told him the exact date when it was. “Did you know it?” 

“No, no. I didn’t know it.” Mentally the date was already marked. 

The Scottish laughed again. “Well now you know, thank me later.” The brunette thanked God that the teasing stopped because otherwise, he was going to mentally kick himself. They kept talking for twenty minutes and the conversation ended with “Send her something pretty!” from Ewan’s part before he hung up.

The date of her birthday came and Hayden kept looking at the phone on his counter, Briar Rose having breakfast next to him. “Are you okay Daddy?” She asked in her sweet voice.

“Yes, sweetie.” He caressed her face. “Just thinking.”

“ ‘bout?” Her big blue eyes looked at him.

He deliberated on telling her about his doubts or brushing them off. “It’s one of my friend’s-” Friend? Was she a friend? Or a colleague maybe? What was she?  “birthday and I don’t know what to get her.” Maybe she would help him decide what to give her.

“What she likes?” She asked, taking a sip from her princess cup.

He racked his brain trying to think about something she told him she liked, but a single thing came up. “Flowers.” Unconsciously he could scent jasmine, even though there wasn't a single one of them in his house. "Jasmine."

“They’re nice and pretty.” That was answer enough for him.

Smiling, he leant and kissed the crown of her head. “You are right, sweetie.” She smiled. “Thank you.”

Giving her a last look, he took his phone and walked to the living room. First tone. You got this. Second tone. Nothing to stress about. Third tone. They're just flowers. Fourth tone and they answered. Too late to back down.

Twenty minutes he was on the phone with the flower shop, twenty minutes where he felt like a teenage boy with a massive crush, a little pathetic if he was honest with himself, and then he went on with his day like normal.

He and Briar were making lunch when his phone rang, whipping his hands on a towel he grabbed his phone and as fast as he picked it up he almost let it fall. Her name appeared on his screen, she was calling. She was calling him.

After coming out of his astonishment, he answered it before she hung up. "Hello."

"Hayden, hi." Her sweet voice reached his ear. "How are you? I hope I'm not interrupting your day." He could hear her walking around her office.

He chuckled. "I'm fine, how are you?" He turned the burner down. "And you are not interrupting, we were making lunch." 

"We?" She cleared her throat. "Sorry. What were you making?" 

"Briar Rose wanted pasta for lunch, so I'm obliging." The little girl walked past him and he caressed her head.

"Nice, it goes great with the cold." The picture of her with her nose and cheeks red popped up on his brain. "I will not take much of your time with her." He shook his head as if she could see him. "I called you to thank you for the beautiful bouquet, I love it." 

He smiled, big and brightly. "I'm glad you liked it." Was she smiling too?

"The note is very beautiful too. My favourite part may I say." The teenage boy with a crush feeling was worthy then.

"I'm pleased to hear, Little Miss Director." He joked, hoping to hear her laugh and he did. 

"How did you know?" She asked curiously.

"A little chatty bird called Ewan maybe, possibly, most certainly, slipped that your birthday was coming up while we talked a few weeks ago.” Hayden knew that wasn't the entire truth, not even close, but just this time he was going to throw his friend under the bus for sure.

She laughed, and possibly she was shaking her head. "Who else if not him?" He laughed too and the background noise became louder. "I'm sorry to cut this short, Hayden, but I got to go." Her kind tone reached his ears.

"No no, please. Duty calls." He thought that she would send him a quick message so hearing her voice was a surprise, although it was for a couple of minutes.

"Bye, I hope your lunch is good. See you later, Starboy." And before he could answer, she hung up.

As if his life was taken from a cheesy rom-com, like the ones he acted in, Hayden stood in the middle of his kitchen looking at his phone as her name disappeared from the screen, but not the feelings from the centre of his chest.

April 2020, Unexpected delight.

His birthday was a special day for him, surrounded by the ones he loved the most. Spending the whole day with his daughter, eating with his family and having a fun time with a few friends. As the private person he was, he couldn't ask for more.

Soon he would have to start training for Anakin's role, so he was enjoying the time off. Briar Rose surprised him with breakfast in bed, helped by his mother, who came around to greet him and helped her beloved granddaughter. 

They were seated in the living room talking about small things and his plans for the day when the doorbell of his front gate rang. “Did you invite someone?” He asked his mother while walking towards the phone he had by the door, but she shook her head. “Yes?”

“Is Mr. Christensen at home?” A male voice said.

He looked at the little screen there and it was a grown man dressed in a FedEx uniform. “Yes, he is.”

“We have a package for him, we need his signature to confirm that he received it.” The man showed the papers in hand and at the box below his arm.

“Okay, I’m coming.” Grabbing his jacket and keys, “It’s a package, I’ll be right back.” he said over his shoulder.

The walk towards the front gate was chilly, he had his hands in his pockets and nose buried in the neck of his jacked. When he saw the guy at the door, the package he had in his arms was a normal size. “Hello.”

“Hello.” They nodded at each other. “You know what it is?” The brunette asked.

The guy shrugged. “No idea, man. It just says fragile and it’s from the US.” Hayden opened the gate and the guy passed him the pen and paper for him to sign. 

He did it, but frowning. It couldn’t be the script, because she would have told him, or Ewan. His friends would have told him if they would be sending him a present, so that wasn’t an option. He tried to think what could possibly be but nothing came to mind. He handed the pen and paper back and the guy gave him the box. “There you go, have a nice day.”

His blue eyes were fixed on the box. “Yeah you too, man.” As quickly as he could he made his way back to the house.

Shaking the box to see what was inside wasn’t an option because it said fragile and whatever it was it could break. His curiosity was getting the best of him when he entered his house. Briar and his mom were still seated on the couch talking but raised their heads to look at him. “What is it, dear?” His mom asked but he shrugged. “From who is it?” He shrugged again. “You know something?” She asked, teasing.

He rolled his eyes. “It’s from the US and it’s fragile.” Her mom frowned. But he walked towards the kitchen and put the box on the counter while he looked for scissors. 

“Can I see it, daddy?” Briar Rose asked from the couch. 

He opened the top drawer. “As soon as I open it, I’m going to show it to you, sweetie.” His voice raised for her to hear him.

The box had a simple black box inside and nothing on it, he frowned again but kept opening it. When he lifted the lid the inside was colourful and smelled amazing. It smelled like jasmine and he smiled. Large pieces of paper, of all colours, surrounded a black cup and a couple of tea bags next to it. He picked up the box and walked towards the living room. “Look, sweetie.”

The little girl opened her eyes big and made space, even though there was plenty, next to her for him to sit. “What is it?”

“A gift.” He said putting the box on the mini table there. The little girl picked up a few of the papers there and started playing with them.

His mother looked at it and smiled. “It’s nice. Who sent it?”

Hayden knew who sent it by the mere smell that came from it, the tea was another clue for all the times they had breakfast together. “A friend.” Two simple words that had nothing simple, describe nothing simple and meant nothing simple to his feelings. His big hand engulfed the cup and lifted it, a laugh came out of him when he saw what was engraved on the side.

Briar Rose and his mom looked at it and the little girl found it hilarious, even though she didn’t quite understand the reference, while her mom laughed a little too. “Storm Pooper.” The girl said between giggles and Hayden laughed at hearing her giggling. 

His mother passed him a white paper folded in half, “there’s a note.” 

Quickly he exchanged the cup for the paper with her and stood up. His name was written in clean neat handwriting and inside were a few simple words. 

Happy Birthday, Starboy, enjoy your day surrounded by the people who are glad and cherish your presence in this world.

 Love, Little Miss Director.

“Someone special?” His mom’s voice brought him back to the real world. He looked at her frowning for a couple of seconds before his eyes fell back to her words. “You are smiling quite big right now.”

Why deny the obvious? “I have to make a phone call, can you keep an eye on Bri?” But he didn’t wait for an answer and walked to the kitchen with his phone.

The last time they talked on the phone was in March for something related to the script, a few questions she had about when he filmed the movies and Ewan was also on the call because the question was directed at him too, so it wasn’t like they talked to each other and it was completely professional. First ring. Keep it simple. Second tone. Casual, relax. Third ring. You are just colleagues, nothing more. Fourth ring. Nothing more because she’s 11 years younger than me. Fifth t- “Hi.” Her sweet voice reached him, a little out of breath as if she was running.

“Hello.” And again, for some reason, his voice went deeper. More than what already was.

Music could be heard in the background. “Did you receive it?” She sounded excited. “Please tell me it arrived whole, please.”

He laughed. “Yes, it did.” She exhaled. “Thank you very much.” He smiled and hoped that she was smiling too. “You didn’t have too.”

“Nonsense.” He could imagine her shaking her head. “Did you like it?” She sounded unsure and he tilted his head to the side. “Because if you don’t it’s okay.” She didn’t let him answer. “I have the sense of humour of a twelve-year-old and I will not apologise for it, but I will understand if you find it hideous.” She used, what he remembered was, her mocking tone and took him back to one of the times he was in her office and they were just chilling. 

“I love it.” He said truthfully and heard her make some victorious sound that made him laugh, which made her laugh. “Briar Rose found it hilarious too.” 

“She did?” She sounded excited again. “Oh, that’s amazing.” He nodded. “When we saw it, I thought that it was hilarious and had to buy it for your birthday.”

He was touched by the sentiment and the gesture. She saw something and thought about me. But the plural pronoun made him frown, it didn’t sit right with him. “We?”

“Yeah, my niece, nephew and me.” She was sharing something private about her. She trusts me. “They are a little older than Briar Rose.”

“Oh.” So the drawings must be from them. But was she married? “Well, you have great taste and as soon as I use it, I will let you know.”

She laughed. “Thank you and I hope you like the tea too.”

“So, what’s up with the nickname?” Since she started calling him like that after her birthday the question has been on his mind.

She laughed. “It seems only fair since I’m Little Miss Director that you are Starboy.” and said in an obvious tone. “Does it bother you? Cause if it does I will stop calling you that.” She was quick to say.

But he shook his head. “Not at all, I’m okay with it.” He heard her hum and, a little afraid, of the conversation finishing there he scratched the back of his head thinking about what he could say to keep her on the phone. “I called in at a bad time?” Hayden wanted to keep talking to her, keep hearing her voice.

“No no, I was cleaning my house, that’s why I was late to answer.” He nodded even though she couldn't see him. 

“On Sunday?” She would notice that you don’t want to hang up, Hayden.

“It’s my only free day.” She laughed. “What about you? Big plans for today?”

They talked for a little while longer, about noncenses, but Briar started calling for him and he didn’t want to take too much of her time, bullshit, so the call was cut short. But the smile he carried for the day was notorious to his mum, to his daughter, to his friends, to everyone who saw him that day, and all because of a phone call with his director.

Next Part →

[orobaxis]

Hiii! I loved your last Ominis X reader fic so much 😍 I really hope you write more!! I have a few prompts I’d love to read but feel free to pick and choose any ones you like because I’ll take any Ominis content you give 🥰

- Reader gets hurt and has to go to the hospital wing. Ominis is super worried and spends as much time as he can with them.

- Reader falls asleep on Ominis’ shoulder (or vice versa)

- Ominis getting bad dating/flirting advice from Sebastian to use on reader. Queue a facepalm from Anne and a very confused reader

- Reader comforts Ominis after he receives a particularly bad howler from his parents

- Ominis and reader each trying to build up the courage to initiate their first kiss.

these are all so sweet oml!! ! happy valentine's day everyone! thank you for all the love! <3

valentine's day chaos

ominis gaunt x reader (hogwarts legacy)

word count: 1200

prompts:

-Ominis getting bad dating/flirting advice from Sebastian to use on reader

-Reader gets hurt and has to go to the hospital wing

-Reader falls asleep on Ominis’ shoulder

and another ask: Loved your Ominis story! More pleaseee! Maybe from the prompt list: “are you really so oblivious?” I feel like that’s so very Ominis to say haha!

beware of spoilers in the comments/tags/reblogs!

ominis was doomed the moment he started to ask sebastian

unfortunately for him, he doesn't really trust anyone else for this super secret task he has appointed himself, and who else would he ask if not for his best mate sebastian? (literally anyone else)

"you want to ask y/n out on a date, do you?"

ominis tries to hide his shock, "what makes you say that?"

sebastian shrugs matter-of-factly, "well, it's valentine's day, and you've been talking about y/n all day today"

they both turn their heads to the sounds of y/n and anne laughing as they play summoner's court

"i have an idea on how you can woo y/n," sebastian suggests, and he basically sees ominis' ears twitch in interest

"well?" ominis starts, almost irritated, as he waits for sebastian, "what is it?"

sebastian smirks, "i know she will appreciate this and you will successfully woo y/n. women love grand gestures of love, y'know."

cut to charms class, all four of you are (kind of) listening to professor ronen talk about some softening charm when

BAM! the door burst open

you crane your head to see...

dwarves

three of them, wearing golden wings and carrying harps, making them resemble cupids...if not for the scowls on their faces

it may as well be goblins from the way they scowl and look around the room

you and anne exchange curious looks, wondering if professor ronen has somehow hired these dwarves, but judging from the curious look on his face as well, you doubt it

you miss sebastian elbowing ominis, an excited look on his face, and whispering, "here they are"

"y/n l/n?" one gruff dwarf calls out

you shrink next to anne, unsure of what the dwarf wants, but you have a sense that it wasn't good

professor ronen, bless him, is very confused, "um... excuse me?"

"are you y/n?"

"err, no...but--"

"y/n l/n?!" all three dwarves shout

anne pipes up, "here! she's here!" raising her hand to point at you

you try to glare at her, curious and anxious about the dwarves

one dwarf tosses you what appears to be a box of chocolates, which you almost drop, while another one clears his throat before reciting in a gruff voice

"y/n l/n, the sound of your laugh

is like my calming draught

i wish we would hug

you are a beauty and me, a lousy dugbog"

"dugbog??" ominis hisses at sebastian, who looks proud of his creation

everyone in the classroom giggles as the three dwarves try to do a pirouette and then vanish

"oh y/n," anne exclaims, "that was so..."

"sweet?" sebastian suggests

"embarrassing!" anne retorts with a laugh. behind her, you dont notice ominis turning pale (paler than he usually is already) before sending a mean elbow into sebastian's stomach (a hex too)

as the class tries to transition back to class, you see looks on their faces, excited to see what is inside the box

you open it and you see a chocolate frog

"oh," you sigh, relieved, before smiling, "this isn't so bad."

when you bite into it however, you feel your stomach turn

professor ronen and anne must have noticed how green you looked as the professor quickly produces a bag in front of you

you proceed to empty the contents of your stomach into the bag

anne frowns at this, "it's a vomiting valentine! it's a nasty thing you usually send to someone who broke your heart on valentine's day!"

"quickly, miss sallow," professor ronen instructs, "please take her to the hospital wing!"

this time, it was sebastian's turn--appearing greener than a frog.

"sallow, what have you done?" ominis hisses, "i thought you said this would work!"

"the dwarves worked, didn't they? they must have picked up a different package, she wasn't supposed to get the vomiting valentine!"

"you oaf!" the gaunt boy huffs as he and sebastian follow you and anne out of the classroom and to the hospital wing, ignoring professor ronen's shouts

-

thankfully, nurse blainey is able to solve your...valentine's malady

ominis, however, is so consumed by guilt, and in his head he just keeps regretting having asked sebastian for help

so when he and seb find you recovering in the hospital wing, he's relieved

and he decides that this should be the time to apologize

"some valentine's, huh?" you smile at them

in seb's quest to ask for ominis' forgiveness, he manages to drag his sister away from the hospital wing

you smile at them and wave, before turning to ominis, who looks stiff as a board, "ominis, are you alright?"

his voice is hard, "you got hurt."

you gesture to yourself, "this? oh it was nothing," you wave your hand to dismiss it

"no," he replies, "you got hurt...because of m- some stupid, stupid valentine's day prank. and you got embarrassed by those dwarves too."

you can see how much this is affecting ominis, so you try to reach for him, settling for his hand

you pull him closer to you, telling him to sit beside you on the bed, "i'll move over, sit here with me"

ominis hums, and sits beside you

"it's all sebastian's fault"

you turn your head to look at him, confused, "seb?"

"yes, he ordered those dwarves...they must have switched the package with the vomiting valentine"

hearing this from ominis kind of deflates you, and you unconsciously turn away from him

"oh...sebastian did those for me? does he...like me?"

ominis gapes in shock, eyebrows raising, "no! i mean...yes, he did all those...but he doesn't like you! he doesn't hate you either...i just meant--"

he sighs, "i asked him for help on what to give you for valentine's day...so this was all his idea. i thought...you'd like these grand gestures and--"

"wait," you perk up, smiling. ominis can hear the joy in your voice, "you...like me?"

now it's ominis' turn to look in your direction, head tilting in curiosity, "yes, of course. are you really so oblivious?"

you laugh, in shock, in relief, as you clutch his hand happily. "i guess i am. but even with the dwarves and the vomiting valentine, this day is still good."

"what makes you say that?"

you blush, mustering the courage to lean in and rest your head on his shoulder. he smells good, feels warm, safe. "well, because i just found out the person i like likes me back."

ominis hums happily at that, visibly relaxing.

you two don't say anything else, but you quietly relish in each other, his hands wrapped around yours

and slowly, he rests his head on top of yours, feeling your breathing becoming even

and ominis closes his eyes, taking in your scent, thinking, "yes, perhaps today wasn't so bad after all."

the twins come to check on you two in a while, and sebastian sighs in relief when they see you two resting, with your head on ominis' shoulder and his head resting on top of yours.

all's well that ends well

until...

"you won't be getting away with this, sebastian," ominis calls out.

[kittievampire]

So long/odd request but hear me out

Mc and Lucifer are in a sugar-rotting relationship and brothers and undatebles react

Lucifer spoils Mc so much like…mammon gets in trouble he gets hung from the ceiling Mc does the same thing they get away scot-free Satan has been begging for a cat for eons nope! but Mc wants one of course. He gets them tons of expensive gifts and if Mc ever wants something they only have to bat their eyes at him. It's not like Mc is using him though they dot on him a bunch too. And whenever they get in a fight loud moans are followed within a few minutes (if you know what I mean) but feel free to ignore 💙

I was in the middle of class when I read this and I was WHEEZING

I am a firm believer in Lucifer spoiling the MC rotten and leaving his brothers to fend for them damn selves but denying any sort of favoritism

I only did the brothers this time, I hope that's okay 😭😭😭

Sorry this took so fooking long to make 🥲

Lemme see what I have in my bag, my dear~

Click here if you wanna request!

Warnings: Very suggestive, jealous bros lmao L

Enjoy.

You and Lucifer had been dating for a few months now. Though, one would think you'd just gotten together with the way the two of you treated eachother. Or maybe that you were newlyweds in your honeymoon phase.

Lucifer treated you like a goddess. There was constant praise and worship, he'd drop everything if you asked, and he'd spoil you rotten with his love. You would return the favor, of course. Every now and then you'd surprise him with a new cursed vinyl, which he'd listen to all night if not spending it with you.

However, the brothers believe that you're getting totally unfair treatment.

Mammon

Baby boy was spending a lot more money than usual

He was playing a new gambling game he'd downloaded on his D.D.D.

When Lucifer got home, he immediately scolded the second-born for a solid 45 minutes

He announced that Mammon was on "lock-down" and wasn't allowed to ask anything of anyone, nor was he allowed to spend money

He was hung from the ceiling

And Goldie was taken away, too

Mammon was pissed the fuck off

So, when he noticed you were spending a lot more money, he did tease you for being greedy

"Oi, human, ain't splurgin' on shopping supposed to be mine and Asmo's thing? Lucifer's gonna be on yer ass if ya spend too much. Just be careful."

He says this and is genuinely a little worried that he'd see you hung from the ceiling as well

Lucifer confronts you about it in front of Mammon

"My Love, may I know why you've been spending so much grimm recently?"

First off, Mammon didn't like how he started that

How come you got that sweet conversation starter?

What he got was, "Mammon, what have you been wasting your money on this time?!"

Though, he still suspected it'd go downhill, and that he'd need to jump in to protect you at some point

"Oh, just some things... I can't tell you what they are, but I promise this is a rare occasion, Luci." You said, gifting him a kiss on his cheek

Lucifer smiled at you. "Alright, as long as you're being responsible, I trust you."

...

WHAT?!

"WHAT?!" Mammon shouted, earning a slight jolt from you and a look of annoyance from Lucifer

"What, Mammon?"

The Avatar of Greed froze. "I-I-! Y-You—" He paused before letting out a small groan

"Nevermind. Forget about it, yeah?"

Leviathan

Snekboi missed roughly a week of school and wasn't attending his online classes

He was grinding this new game he got so he could keep his spot as one of the top players!

He just couldn't afford to take his attention off of his D.D.D. for a second, the price would be too high!

Of course, Levi ended up being scolded by Lucifer

"Your priority must be your studies, Levi, do you intend on dragging Diavolo's name through the mud?"

How Diavolo was relevant was beyond him

But, Levi still had to sit through a lecture

He also got his D.D.D. taken away from him for a week

Not only did he lose top-spot, but he lost a majority of his self-esteem as well

So, he was obviously worried when you started skipping as well

"Uhh, MC, I'm not sure you should stay home today. Lucifer's not too kind to those who slack off."

But, his warnings fell upon deaf ears

You decided to take a few days off, deciding that you just really didn't feel like going to RAD

You woke up with a migraine one day, couldn't get sufficient sleep the other, and you just took another day to catch up on sleep and what work you had

Leviathan actually tried to stop Lucifer when he saw him outside of your room

"Lucifer, maybe they were feeling really bad or something, I don't think punishing them is a good idea, please show mercy! They're just a human!"

"Quit your whining, Levi. Or do you want to be given the Mammon treatment?"

This made Levi yelp and cower behind him, watching as Lucifer knocked on your door

You answered it, and Leviathan bit his nails nervously

"Hey, Luci," You said, greeting him with a small kiss to the cheek

"My Love," He started softly. "Are you feeling alright? You haven't been attending your classes. Is something wrong?" He asked, a hand reaching up to caress your cheek.

Error 404 not found

Leviathan.exe has stopped working

You smile sweetly. "I'm okay, Lucifer, I just really wasn't feeling up for RAD these past couple of days. It's nothing to worry about, promise!" You say, quite enthusiastically.

...

NANI THE FUCK?!

Levi SWORE you were about to get bodied

But, no

Lucifer just smiled, chuckled softly, and left with an "Alright, take care of yourself, Love."

Bullshit

You're fucking hacking

Satan

Satan wanted to bring a cat into the HoL

Lucifer reminded him of how he brought more cats than were allowed and "turned the House of Lamentation into the House of Cats"

Very fucking salty about it, but ultimately got over it (for the most part)

He saw you bring a little feline home and immediately rushed to your side to help you take care of it

It was a stray with a few wounds from other cats

He helped you bandage it and feed it, all the goods

"MC, I must warn you that Lucifer isn't exactly fond of pets... Let alone cats," Satan said, stern gaze meeting yours

You tilted your head in confusion. "Why is that?"

Satan was a bit hesitant to tell you, so he gave you the shortened and sweet version

"We had a bit of a cat problem a while back, he just really doesn't like cats. Dog people, am I right?" He scoffed

"Satan, what did I say about bringing in cats?"

Satan lowkey jumped a bit and turned his head

The fuck did he come from, bro is teleporting or some shit

You immediately hold the kitty close to your arms, looking up at Lucifer with doe eyes

"Luci, I'm sorry! I was the one who took in the cat, but he was hurt! Please, can we just keep it for a little while, at the very least?" You begged, the black cat in your arms meowing at Lucifer

Satan sighed. He was about to tell you that it was no use, that Lucifer couldn't be bought or reasoned with on this topic. That may have been his fault and he was sorry, but there was absolutely no way Lucifer would budge on this-

"Fine."

...

...

Um

What

Satan sat there dumbfoundedly before the two of you as you continued to converse, trying to process the events that had just taken place

Lucifer said yes

To you

For a cat?

Huh...

He was upset for a mere moment, but then a light bulb went off in his mind

Perhaps he could use this to an advantage

Satan's definitely going to try and get you to be a wild card whenever him and Belphie are pulling pranks on Lucifer

Just so the eldest will be a little more lenient

Now he knew Lucifer's weakspot

He found himself laughing maniacally in his mind as he realized just how much him and Belphegor could do with you as a cushion whenever they'd get in trouble

Asmodeus

"But, Lucifer, all of products in my favorite cosmetic brand are going on sale today! I have to get every single one of them or else I'll be..." Asmodeus gasped

"Trashy!!" He cried out, practically leeching off of Lucifer's arm as he continued to beg

"Asmodeus, no! You and Mammon are both on lockdown for the rest of the month! Now, get off of me!"

Lucifer managed to pry his younger brother off of him and slammed ether door shut to his office, leaving a near-on sobbing Asmodeus in the library

That's when he heard you

"Lucifer, must you always be so rough on your siblings?" He heard you ask, making him gasp and sigh dreamily. "Oh, darling, you always come to my rescue when I need it!" He said, his voice not loud enough to penetrate the door

"MC, I suggest staying out of my family matters. They have nothing to do with you."

Asmodeus could tell from the other side of the door that an argument was likely about to ensue

However, when the two of you started raising your voices, he could also sense some... Arousal?

"Oh!"

"Oh."

It wasn't long before he could hear your moans and whimpers from the other side of the door, lewd slapping noises making him step back a bit

Asmodeus couldn't help but giggle a little

He honestly didn't mind this as much as his brothers did, he found it really entertaining that the two of you endulged in his sin after such a heated argument

Asmodeus approves 👍💖

Beelzebub

Poor baby gets scolded so often for raiding the fridge, especially late at night

He's usually told to go to bed, and that these late-night trips to the fridge aren't good for him, all that

He couldn't help it, it was his sin! That was no fair!

Lucifer ended up putting him on lockdown after 11pm, meaning no trips outside of his room whatsoever

Beelzebub would usually try to get some snacks into his room before that time, but he usually ran out rather quickly and was left with a rumbling stomach

That's when you came in, holding two arm-fulls of snacks

Quietly, you pushed the door closed with your foot

You knew Belphegor was a heavy sleeper, but you still wanted to be quiet anyway, so as not to wake the Avatar of Sloth

You saw the gluttonous ginger perk up when he saw you

"MC?"

You smiled, dropping down the snacks before him

"Lucifer didn't say I couldn't raid the kitchen. I figured you'd be hungry, so I got you some snacks."

Bro bear-hugs you

He lowkey almost breaks your spine with how tight he holds you

"Thank you, MC! Can I call you sister, please? Get married to him quick so I can call you sister!"

You blushed at this comment, chuckling softly

"I'm working on it, I guess," You choked playfully, patting his back

"Beel, I need to breathe."

Not really all too jealous

A bit sad, but he gets over it when you bring him food

Lucifer never says anything about it tho when he finds out you're the one who's causing such a snack shortage

Belphegor

He was constantly scolded for pulling all kinds of pranks on Lucifer

There was that time he threw his D.D.D. in the trash, lit his coat on fire

All harmless things

So, when he catches you attaching a can of whipped cream to... Something in the fridge, he immediately raises a brow at you

"Hey, what are you doing?"

"Ahhh, just setting up a little surprise," You chuckled out

At first, he thinks it's for Beelzebub, but Asmodeus had taken him shopping with him earlier with the promise of free food afterward

"For..." Belphie trailed off, hearing footsteps nearing the kitchen

Immediately you close the fridge and take your seat in front of a plate of food you'd made yourself earlier. "Sit down," You whispered to the Avatar of Sloth

As he shuffled to a seat next to you, he realized what you were up to and put a hand over his mouth

Lucifer walked into the kitchen, greeting you and the youngest with a smile and a "Good morning."

You picked up a piece of the pancakes in front of you with a fork, putting it in your mouth and humming to yourself. "Luci? Could you pass me the butter?" You asked softly

Lucifer nodded, turning and opening the fridge

Immediately, whipped cream sprayed all over his face, some falling onto his chest

Belphegor bursted into a fit of laughter, immediately giving you a high-five and wiping a tear from his eye as he clutched his stomach

"Oh, that was good!" He choked out in between laughs

Lucifer turned to look at the youngest, wiping off a large portion of the whipped cream on his face

"Belphegor, did you do this?"

You snickered beside him, looking up at Lucifer

"I thought you'd like a snack, Luci~" You hummed out, giggling softly

Belphegor mentally prepared himself for a 45 minute lecture

There was a pause, making him shift a bit in his seat as his laughter died down

Suddenly, Lucifer began to laugh

It started out small

Then, his laughter boomed in the room, bouncing off of the walls

"Huh,"

This confused the fuck out of Belphie

Like, ummmm what

"You've gotten me, MC, well done. I needed that laugh." He said, walking over to you and wiping some whipped cream off of him, putting it on your nose

He dismissed himself, saying he was going to wash this off of him

Belphegor was silent for a moment

"Hm?"

"You get laughter and boops after pranks and I get lectures and scoldings... Favoritism at it's finest. The Anti-Lucifer League could make use of this."

He'd explain more, but he was getting too sleepy

Shit was fun asf to write, thanks for requesting

I hope you enjoyed this, anon!

[frostbitemutt]

some Jack marston hcs? Low honor more specifically 👀

Oh dear. But, Yes. Yes I will. This is low honor. Don't expect anything less than awful 💀.

Yandere! Low honor! Jack Marston hcs

Warnings: gender neutral darling, yandere trope, forced "relationship", obsession, stalking, harassment, unwanted crude flirting, perverted comments, non-consensual kissing and touching mentioned (nothing explicit), breaking and entering, kidnapping, violence, murder, sadism

Main traits:

|perverted/possessive/violent/sadistic|

✘ John Jack Marston Jr. Better to just call him Jack. A raunchy 19 year old trying to imitate his less than a saint father. On track to being an outlaw... yeah.. you're pretty fucked. He's an absolute little shithead.

✘ I'm going to assume you're a local townsfolk, maybe a store clerk, farmer, or maybe you're just his neighbor. You'll know when you've caught his eye. He makes it more than clear. Hounding you around town. Cat-calling you.

✘ His comments are perverted "They tell me I'm at my sexual peak sweetheart..", "Come on, just one kiss.", "are you are aroused as I am?".. and other comments. Very much to your dismay. Dosen't matter your gender. The perversion dosen't stop at words. If you don't have your curtains shut.. you may have to deal with a peeping Tom. His hands wander where they shouldn't, attempting to grab at you, pull you in close enough for him to kiss.

✘ He's possessive of you. You're not in a relationship. Hell you're not even friendly with him. You're definitely less than that. He still feels you're his regardless of the fact you hate his ass. No other man or woman needs to be looking or touching up on you. That's his job. Not theirs. He won't stand by and let someone else harrass you either. To him it's only okay when he does it. Hypocrite. Threatening, dueling, and shooting people left and right.

✘ Just like his daddy, he's violent. Wouldn't John be proud? Probably not. I already mentioned him shooting randos down. Your friends? They're found with a ludicrous amount of bullet holes. Lover? Yeah their head got blow clean off with a shotgun, sorry. You ain't off the hook either. He'll tackle you to the ground and manhandle you in a fit of anger. He'll shout real loud too. Sudden and explosive is how his temper runs.

✘ Sadism is something that shines through a bit in Jack. Now he's not going out of his way to harm or hit you most of the time, unless he's feeling petty. Maybe he'll give you a mildly harsh kick to your side. However that dosent mean he isn't at all. Your tears, your screams, your sobs, and your insults...make him feel all funny inside as he'd put it. Yuck. He'll laugh and snort at you most of the time. Mocking you and your fear. Maybe even make some pig noises at you to add some salt to the wound.

✘ You swear, you wake up at least once a week to a weird noise in your home. Window or door suddenly cracked open, not even cracked, more like wide open. Yet you can't find no one. Oh, yeah, mutiple items go missing too. Lots of clothes. Toothbrush. Notebooks if you got any. Were there always boot prints in your carpet? Your bed feel oddly warm? Nope. It was Jack. Who else.

✘ Escape is certainly.. difficult when he goes to kidnap you. He abuses the fuck out of his lasso. Running away on foot? Lasso. On horse? Get the fuck over here. Lasso. Move more than 30 feet from him? Lasso. That point he's doing it cause he thinks it's funny. Unfortunate for you. Not to downplay the fear that comes with it. Thinking you're free, only to be yanked off your horse and hogtied to the back of his.

✘ It's all much worse when he has you isolated, in his home. No police you can snitch to, bystanders to chase him off, or neighbors of yours to questioning him snooping about. He's dosen't bother restraining himself, he was barely before. Sloppily kissing you, hands grasping wherever he can, shoving you against the nearest solid surface. It's vile.

✘ You'll have to endure more of his tantrums than ever. Grumbling when you refuse to talk to him, because why would you want to? Pouting and stomping his foot when you push him away from you. Going on rants when you won't stop crying. His mood changes day from day. Luckily after a bit you might be able to read his face and tell when he's about to to blow a fuse. You can brace yourself for his delusional complaining.

✘ Don't loose all hope. Escape is possible. Now I'm not going to say Jack's stupid, he isn't. However we're still talking about a 19 year old. (I'm almost 19 I can throw shade). He doesn't have a plethora experience like his dad or an older outlaw. He's a new adult on a violent power trip. If he leaves the house, check the locks, he might have forgotten one. Try to knock him unconscious in his sleep or.. more permanent if you're absolutely certain you can. That's the more risky option. If you can act well enough, you can possibly convince him to let you outside with him. If he does? Book it.

[fallingdown98]

Shout out to Fantasy High Junior Year to get me to post original thoughts on here for the first time on years - Thought after Episode 15, The Last Stand, spoilers ahead

Based on what happened with Buddy, Brennan's callout of "what was loaded into that crossbow?", and Brennan saying in AP that killing Buddy was always on the table this is what I think Kipperlilly Clerickiller's plan was (Also ty Fandom I will be using this forever now)

1. Snuck in with Buddy when the Last Stand was being set up. (Saw some people questioning how she managed to get in, I truly think it's as simple as this)

2. Steal both Buddy and Kristen's diamonds to ensure no reviving can occur

3. I think the plan was to shoot the proctor with rage crystals, causing him to hulk out and depending on timing, no one to stop more monsters from arriving.

4. Based on where she was standing, I think the goal was to blame the crossbow bolt on Buddy and then leave still undetected with Oisin's prepped plane shift

4a. I still think Buddy dying was always part of the plan but I think the goal was to get the Bad Kids to have to ruin their own situation (Having to kill the hulked out proctor, seeing Buddy as an enemy and targeting him, being stuck because if Kristen had used her 7th level slot then they would at minimum be stuck for 8 hours assuming they all managed to survive if the monsters were still coming)

5. Theory here and we'll see if it proves correct but my immediate thought when Buddy died was that KLCK is planeshifting to the Celestial plane and hoping to use Buddy to sneak into Sol's office like when Aguefort snuck in through Kristin's backpack

6. Once in Sol's office, she would be where YES! Was originally created and the reason Bakur supposedly failed his ritual is that he needed to be in a place where a god had been created in order to rez a God.

7. Chaos ensues when corrupted Ankarna is brought back

8. Profit??? I guess??? Tbh the exact reasoning of the Ratgrinders is still the most elusive thing to me. I think my current most likely thought is that Jace is serving as manipulator and that KLCK is the most "lost in the sauce" as it were what with her pre-established anger issues.

Since we only saw a hand I'm reserving judgement on Oisin as he may have only been aware of his part of the plan and not the rest of what Miss ClericKiller has been up to. Not attached so I'm also down for him to be full evil but I'm just not sure yet.

Another thought I had is that the Ratgrinders may yet mirror the Bad Kids not just in class, but also in personal problems.

Ruben and Fig both having identity crises but Ruben has isolated himself so much he's turned to being a lackey

MaryAnn just doing what she's doing because she's good at it, not because it's something she's passionate about

If Oisin's dragon relative is evil and he's going along with the plot because of that, that would mirror Adaine breaking away from her own evil parents

Don't know enough about Ivy to have thoughts on her really, buddy and Lucy could probably be their own post tbh, and as I can't get a lock on Kipperlilly.

Jawbone seemed convinced she was just misunderstood and jawbone usually has a pretty good read on people. But then she's smiling while murdering Buddy and teleporting away. Why does she hate Riz specifically? Is it something he did or is it more generic jealousy (or a crush but I don't care for that theory personally and doesn't feel super supported currently)?

What's the deal with the rage soil and how did they place a rune of Ankarna's name on Yolanda/Lucy if it was unknown at that point?

Anyway, feel free to reblog or tag with thoughts, I'm so excited to unravel more of this mystery.

[britishassistant]

Gale’s Excellent Adventure

It is just Gale’s luck that the first time he leaves his tower in a year, he is immediately kidnapped by mindflayers.

He opens his eyes to find himself staring at one of the ghastly, squid-like creatures inserting one of its spawn into the pupil of a young tiefling next to him.

It turns back to the pool of liquid which houses its tadpoles—!

And then a thunderous blow rocks the vessel.

The mindflayer looks up in what Gale might suppose passes as panic for these creatures, then drifts out of the room at speed.

It doesn’t return.

Well, Gale reflects with a sense of mild anticlimax. He supposes that this is a net win for him! It’s good that the creatures haven’t had the chance to implant their spawn in him yet. Really, it is.

It just.

Feels a little like he’s been left out, is all.

And then the nautiloid splits apart as it plummets from the sky.

Thank My—the Gods it’s over Faerûn when it does. Even Gale doesn’t fancy his chances in Avernus.

However, in trying to save himself by reawakening an old teleportation point, he does manage to get himself lodged in a waypoint between the Weave and the Material Plane.

A little embarrassing, perhaps, but overall he’s thankful that he has all his faculties about him and his powers at his command to turn to this little inconvenience. Imagine if he’d gotten into this conundrum with a mindflayer tadpole on the brain as well! He can’t imagine that would be in any way conducive to problem solving.

It’s just as well, really. It is.

He’s most of the way to freeing himself when he senses something approach.

And well. He could do it without outside help, but where’s the sense in burning spell spots when some good old fashioned elbow grease can do the trick?

Desperately hoping it’s not another squirrel, Gale sticks his arm out the widening hole and waggles it around. “Hello? A hand, anyone?”

Something slaps it sharply.

This is good! he thinks as he yelps. That felt more like the fingers of a sentient being taking the piss rather than an owlbear about to maul him.

“Perhaps I should have clarified. A helping hand? Please?”

After a few awkward moments of waving his hand around in mid-air, he feels a warm, small pair endowed with sharp, sharp nails (Ow!) catch onto his wrist and start pulling.

He tries to lean into the pull, not entirely sure what else he can do other than shout encouragement as he gradually feels himself slipping back to the Material Plane.

His ejection may not be the most graceful, but at least he doesn’t lose his lunch like a novice.

A young tiefling stares up at him, flanked by a half-elf and a pale elf.

The same young tiefling, he notes, whom he had witnessed being infected with mindflayer spawn back on the nautiloid.

Ah. Well. Hm.

“Erm. Hello!” His mouth babbles without his full consent. “I’m Gale, of Waterdeep. Apologies, I’m usually better at this.”

“At introductions?” The young tiefling replies, one eyebrow raised.

He can’t quite help the sharp, nervous bark of laughter at that. “Sarcasm! Wonderful, wonderful stuff. Erm, no, but ah. Say, you were on the Nautiloid as well, weren’t you? I think I saw you receiving a rather, erm. Unwelcome insertion into the ocular region.”

The young tiefling grimaces slightly, eyes watchful and wary where they peek out from under an overgrown fringe.

“Oh, goody, we’ve found another one.” The pale, foppish elf pipes up. “Do you want to start on embroidering matching doublets or shall I?”

The half-elf in the purple tunic rolls her eyes. “Honestly, I wish we’d left you to the boars.”

The elf leans towards her, fluttering his eyelashes. “And deprive yourself of this face? Darling, you couldn’t.”

“Try me.” The half-elf snorts, before turning her gaze back to Gale. “But, my condolences for your experiences on that ship. I know I hardly found it pleasant.”

“Hm.” The tiefling hums, shifting their weight. Gale abruptly notices that they’re missing the tail usually sported by their kind and then has to make himself stop noticing. Tara will have his hide if he’s rude to the poor soon-to-be-mindflayer.

“While I couldn’t have phrased it any more repellently myself, it’s…good to meet another who’s survived that process.” They say, choosing their words carefully. “I don’t suppose you’ve any special information on what’s happening to us, or how to remove the damn things from our heads?”

Wait.

Hang on.

Do they think that Gale also has…?

Well. It’s understandable really. He was on the mindflayer ship, ergo he should be infected with a mindflayer parasite. A simple assumption. A correct one, had circumstances been a little different.

Gale is suddenly aware that he has two choices before him.

He can admit to the misunderstanding, apologize for it even. Send these lovely, if sadly infected people on their way to quest for a cure. Find the nearest center of civilization and see about preparing the components of a teleportation spell to get back to his tower. Go to his quarters, have a stiff drink or several, and wait for Tara to return with some more magical items to feed the orb while trying not to think about them. Never leave again until something thoroughly mundane and unremarkable bumps him off, leveling the Sword Coast along with his corpse. Perhaps a fish bone in his throat. Or tripping on the stairs.

Or…

Or.

“This insertee, we speak of, this parasite?” Gale says, trying to strike a balance between serious and glib. “Are you aware that after a period of excruciating gestation it will turn us into mindflayers?”

The tiefling snorts. “I am. Though the timing seems subject to debate. I saw a woman transform on the ship within seconds. That’s not normal, is it?”

Gale blinks, feeling his throat dry. Seconds? That’s…

“No, it most decidedly is not. Ceremorphosis usually takes place over seven days, altering the victim’s body to suit its new host. Hopefully that…anomaly was just a byproduct of proximity to the nautiloid and its nurseries, though that‘s hardly been documented in any studies on the subject…could it be that the creatures have…?”

“Quite.” The pale elf interrupts, “But what would you prescribe for dealing with our new guests?”

Gale shrugs. “You don’t happen to be cleric by any chance, do you? A doctor? Surgeon? Uncannily adroit with a knitting needle?”

The elf lets out a sultry titter of a laugh. “Only in matters of the heart, darling. I’m afraid I’m rather hopeless at all else.”

“And you seem to know enough about our condition to realize it is beyond most clerics’ skills.” The half-elf says sternly.

Gale gives his most charming smile. “Most, no doubt. But I find myself hoping that I may be in the presence of the few. You don’t happen to be one of them?”

The half-elf’s lips twist, and she shakes her head. When he looks to the young tiefling (they can’t be more than seventeen, poor thing), they shrug.

“Hardly. I was going to ask you the same question.”

“We’re most certainly going to need a skilled healer,” Gale lies. “And soon too. How about we lend each other a helping hand once more, and look for a healer together?”

The three of them share a wary glance.

Gale tries not to look too hopeful.

He does feel a bit of a scoundrel, lying to obviously sick people like this. It’s just—! He’s an archmage, one of Mystra’s former chosen. Surely if anyone can help these poor people find the aid they need, it’ll be him? If nothing else, he can provide knowledge, protection in battle, moral support? Maybe even study their condition a bit, see if there’s any truth to what the tiefling said about that instantaneous transformation. For three mindflayer infectees, they all look and sound remarkably lucid, nary a damp brow or the haze of fever among them. And—

And, damn it all, but Gale’s been miserable up in his tower. Not that Tara isn’t fine company, but Mystra was his entire world. And with her gone, he’s felt. Lost. Purposeless. And that’s even without the orb burning within him. This, this is the chance to get away from all that. To have a real adventure, a proper one. Something to take his mind off things.

And he likes these people. He’s known them less than fifteen minutes, and maybe it’s the loneliness of a full year with only a tressym talking, but Gale feels as though he could bond with these folk, given half the chance. The pale elf is charmingly witty, the half-elf seems rather sweet beneath her cold exterior, and the tiefling rather puts him in mind of Tara when she was younger. He wants to get to know them all. He thinks he’d like to be their friend.

The tiefling lets out a small sigh, drawing him back to the present.

“Sounds like a plan. You’re welcome to join us, if you wish.”

“Most excellent!” Gale has to clear his throat slightly at the force of his excitement. “A parasite shared is a parasite halved. Or something to that effect.”

The tiefling raises an eyebrow at him, while the elf quirks a sardonic grin.

Gale feels his smile waver slightly before he rallies. “Oh! But before you think you’re about to embark on a journey with most ill-mannered a man: thank you, for pulling me out of that stone. It was an act of foresighted kindness, I assure you, for I have the feeling ample opportunities will present themselves for me to return the favor.”

“I’ll hold you to it,” The tiefling says, a small smile finally gracing their face. “I’m Yuu, of Elturel.”

At his blink, the pale elf exhales a laugh. “I know, I know, I had the exact same reaction darling. Strange names people give themselves around those parts, though of course it’s hardly a patch on Shadowheart.”

“Astarion.” The half-elf, presumably Shadowheart grits out.

“Alright, that’s enough.” Yuu claps their hands. “Tadpoles out first, then we can have all the debates about names we want. Let’s move.”

“But darling, even you must admit…!”

Gale grins as he follows, and tries not to feel too guilty.

[ell-arts]

I have a question, if it doesn't bother you, what tips would you give to beginning writers? and I'm also loving seeing your art and pmatga fanfics

Thank you! And it's not a bother at all 💙

There's a lot I can say regarding writing tips, and I might even make a series out of it where I share bite-sized tips for writing. For now, tips I would give to beginner writers would be;

Read books. You'll learn best by taking inspiration from your favourite authors and how they go about their writing. It also helps in building up your vocabulary.

Daydream! It helps with creativity and fosters excitement for your work, which helps a lot with motivation. I find that listening to music while daydreaming is an effective combo to conjure up great ideas.

Give yourself a standard of quality to aim for, but don't set the bar too high. Give yourself goals that are achievable for your writing, then look back and see where you can improve to take your writing further.

Avoid redundancy. This is where you use too many words or phrases that describe the same thing. Sometimes one may get caught up in trying to describe the moment as best as one can to get an idea across, and in doing so could convolute the paragraph. Reducing redundancy as much as you can will benefit your writing in the long run.

Avoid repetition of the same words or phrases in close sequences. For example, don't use 'shouted' multiple times within the span of 4 paragraphs.

Spell-check is your friend! I use the free version of Grammarly to help me with more sophisticated spellchecking - it helped me correct a lot of errors I would have otherwise missed.

In the same breath; reread your story to yourself as much as possible and listen to the way it sounds. If you don't feel convinced by the writing, chances are neither will the reader.

Purple Prose is when you use far too many big and fancy words in your writing, while Beige Prose is when you use the most simplistic of words, almost to the point of being boring. Find a nice balance between the two.

Pace your paragraphs according to the mood of the scene. This falls more under personal preference, but paragraph length can help with the pacing of a scene and serve as an aid to guide your reader's emotions through the story. If the scene calls for action, urgency, or a climactic moment, keep your paragraphs short and to the point. Longer paragraphs tend to read longer and evoke a sense of calm or focus, whereas shorter paragraphs read quicker and can thus influence the build-up of emotions for a particularly crucial scene.

'Said' is not dead, but it IS an overused word when indicating who is speaking. Spice it up a bit by looking into synonyms with some emotion or tone attached, like muttered, blurted, rasped, seethed, stuttered, drawled, etc. Even neutral-toned verbs can work like stated, intoned, voiced, questioned, etc. But sometimes, said is all you need - just use it sparingly.

Keep it simple. Sometimes a single sentence is all that's needed to get the right feeling across. Short but sweet.

Above all, have fun!

Additionally, I use this website, WordHippo, to help me out with new words or fresh synonyms whenever I'm looking for a specific word that will fit just right for the sentence I'm working on. Give it a try!

I hope this helps in any way! If any seasoned writers out there would like to give their two cents, feel free to do so!

[themultifandomgal]

From 2010- Before

2012

Part 21

3 Weeks Earlier

“I miss you” I say into the phone as I walk into the studio

“I miss you too. I’ll see you soon though” Alex replies

“I know” I sigh “how’s collage going?” I ask sitting down on the sofa

“It’s alright. I honestly have no clue what I want to do though once I leave”

“You could always come be a roadie” I joke making Alex laugh

“Don’t tempt me. How’s the song writing going?”

“It’s not. We have to write boyband love songs”

“But your not a boyband?” Alex sounds confused over the phone

“Oh I know, but we have an image for teenage girls and a few teen boys. Some times I regret my decision. If I knew it would be like this then…”

“Hey don’t think like that. Have you spoken to the others?”

“Not yet. I will, but they just seem to be having the time of their lives”

“What’s your contract say?”

“We have to release songs to SYCO for at least another 3 years”

“You can do this. I believe in you”

“Mornin’” Harry shouts walking into the studio

“I’ll let you go. I’ll see you soon ok?”

“Yeah”

“I love you”

“I love you too” I put the phone down and give Harry a small smile “hey. Where’s the others?”

“Gone to get snacks. You know I’m here for you, we all are”

“How much of that did you hear?”

“A fair bit. I wasn’t ease dropping on your conversation, but I just didn’t want to interrupt, sorry”

“No it’s ok”

“From now on you talk about issues that your dealing with ok? Your not going through this alone ok?”

“Thanks H. Why don’t we start writing while we wait for the others” I suggest getting a pen and note pad out of my bag.

1 Week Earlier

“What’s up Uncasvill!” Niall yells into his microphone and the fans all scream back “now we have a little secret. YN care to tell everyone”

“Do they deserve to know the secret? What do you think guys shall we tell you?” I ask then point my microphone to the crowed who all yell once again “ok ok” I hold my free hand in the air “shhhh ok. We may be working on album number 2” this causes everyone to scream again with excitement

“m’not sure tha’ they’re tha’excited YN”

“No me either Harry” I say shaking my head “let’s try this again shall we? Who’s excited!” I ask yelling causing everyone to scream “ok now with that announcement out of the way the next song were going to sing is Up All Night”

During the song Harry jumps on Louis back making them fall on to the floor which causes me to miss my cue. Thankfully the crowd sing along which makes it easier for me to jump back in.

48 Hours Earlier

“Shit” I grumble seeing all the flashing lights outside our hotel

“Hey your ok, we’ve got you” Niall says placing his arm over my shoulders

“I’ll go first ok?” Louis says looking at me. I give him a nod and the doors open. I walk behind Louis with Niall while Zayn, Liam and Harry are behind us

“Get back!” Paul shouts at the paparazzi

“YN have you and Alex broke up?”

“Harry are you dating Taylor?”

“Louis does Eleanor trust you and YN?”

“Zayn has Perrie come to any shows yet?”

It’s question after question, making my head feel fuzzy. Thankfully Niall doesn’t let go of me

“YN how good are the boys in bed?”

“YN look over here!”

“Turn this way!”

“Move!” I once again hear Paul say when I feel someone grab my arm. I turn to see who it is, but I’m meet with a camera in my face. Zayn is quick to pull the guy away while I’m ushered into our car. My breathing rises while there’s ringing in my ears. I close my eyes and focus on my breathing

“You good YN?” I hear Liam ask. I give him a little nod grateful I’m now in the safety of the car.

24 Hours Earlier

24 hours to go till Alex arrives, 24 hours and I’m in the arms of the man I love. I finish getting myself ready for the show when my dad comes over to me

“I think you need to speak to a doctor” he says

“I’m fine”

“No your not. You’ve been having these panic attacks for a few months now. Maybe you should stop performing”

“What!?” I yell facing my dad

“I don’t mean forever, but maybe just for now while you get all of this under control”

“Dad it’s just part of fame. I’ll have to get used to it”

“I’m just worried that something could tip you over the edge”

“Dad I promise I have it under control. How about this. We have just over a month left of tour, once it’s over I’ll speak to someone”

“Fine but you have one more panic attack and I’m taking you home”

“Deal”

“And don’t think I won’t ask the boys to tell me if you do” my phone then pings letting me know I have a text. I look down and see it’s off Alex

‘Can’t wait to see you tomorrow’

[almost-blondee]

Hello!

Could you do a social butterfly!Narancia (Jojo) and very introverted Reader?

Like Reader just spends their free time either at home or library. And Narancia is dragged to that library by Fugo, he's just there to grab some books and Narancia is not happy to be there until he sees Reader.

Have a good day!

Lucky Day

Narancia x introverted!reader

Fluff, Day at the library

Word count: 1.4k

So this is my first time doing requests, so hopefully this is okay. I’m worried that i kinda strayed off topic or it’s kinda too all over the place. but hopefully this is somewhat close to what you’d like

Also please don’t mind spelling or grammar error i tried to find them all but i may have missed some, Thank you and enjoy!!!

——————————————————————————

“You know Narancia you’re never going to get smarter if you don’t try” Fugo tries to somewhat encourage the other young male. “ugghhhh, i’ve heard this like a million times…” He responds while trudging along. It just so happens that they were on their way to the library to pick up some books for Fugo. However Fugo took it as a chance to pressure the boy to pick up his slack.

“i’m only coming with you cuz’ you promised me some snacks…” Narancia hesitantly added. They were now nearing the library and Narancia was dreading just sitting in there waiting for Fugo, never mind all the useless knowledge he would hear after Fugo picked up his books. Usually when this happened Narancia would sit somewhere in the library and wait while Fugo would find his books. Every so often he would lay his eyes on a certain someone. Narancia didn’t know anything about them, not even their name. He was just so enthralled with watching the way they were. As he was entering the library he caught himself wondering if you would happen to be there. After all it seemed you liked to spend most of your time at the library, you were there every time he was, and that was next to none.

“okay Narancia, just go sit where you usually do, i’ll try to be quick.”

“ yeah sure whatever you say that every time” Narancia mumbles under his breath while walking towards his usual table.

Just as he was about to slouch down into his usual chair, he had noticed that someone was sitting at his table. His first thought was to threaten this person to make them move, that was until you looked up from your book, to see him staring at you. As soon as he realized it was you, the intimidating look on his face disappeared being replaced with a softer one. Narancia thought to himself that he must be the luckiest man alive. He slyly walked to the chair across from you and sat down. You try your hardest to focus back on the book in front of you knowing that talking to strangers wasn’t really your thing. However, you could quite literally feel him staring at you. So, you’d have to look up at some point. So you did exactly that. You slowly brought your eyes up to see his face, shining so bright you’d almost reached for the blinds.

“Hi, I’m Narancia, Nice to meet you! I’ve seen you here lots!” He said almost immediately after you had looked up. Not really expecting him to be so forward you immediately averted your eyes to think of something to say. Unfortunately for you, he didn’t even let you get a thought in and continued talking.

“It seems like you like to come here, is that right? have you ever seen me around. I mean probably not. you’re always pretty focused on the books you’re reading” He borderline shouts at you.

you manage to compose your self.

“ um… yes i have seen you a couple times. Do you also like coming to the library?” You ask at an attempt to make conversation. Truth is, you have seen him around, how could you not, he was always so loud when coming to the library. Very vocally complaining about how long his friend was taking. so you sorta already knew the answer to your question.

“HAHAHA, good one…” Narancia says as he pretends to wipe a tear from his eye. “ I’m only here because my buddy Fugo apparently ‘needs someone to come pick up his books with him’. He obnoxiously says while using finger quotations. “oh, i see…” You say, not really knowing how else to respond.

“yup, he always babbling on about how i need to get smarter and actually care about my education yata yata.” He readjusts the way he’s sitting. “ but you know it’s not so bad coming here if i get to see you.” he then throws in a wink, hoping that will win you over.

you were again taken aback by his forwardness and immediately you can feel your face heat up, you don’t do so well with compliments. Especially from someone who you’d like to say was attractive.

“i’m just teasing although i wouldn’t mind if we could meet here more often, just the two of us of course.”

Now thinking to yourself that he is relentless, you can’t help but chuckle at his attempt of flirting. You wouldn’t mind spending sometime with him if it meant getting to know each other better. you had been quite interested in him since you first saw him, wondering why he hated the library so much.

“Um, yeah i’ll have to think on that one. we have only just met.” you say quietly, unsure if he could even hear you.

“Well how about we talk a little more then you can tell me your answer, yeah?” he retorts looking at you like a puppy, if he had a tail you’re sure it would be wagging.

“Okay, sure” you simply say, looking down at your watch. Only now realizing that it was almost time for your shift to start. You say you had about 10 minutes give or take. So you decided to humour the boy sitting across from you.

You watched as he rambled on about something as simple as his favourite snacks, he was basically having a conversation with him self. Expect from the occasional “hmm” “i see” “nice” from you. By the time he was ready to ask you what your favourite snacks were you were slowly packing up and getting ready to leave. Narancia noticed this, and inquired. “ you have somewhere to be?” his eyebrow slightly raising. he was staring at you so intensely you were almost afraid to say yes.

you reluctantly told him that you had a shift at the café down the street and usually came here to kill sometime before clocking in.

“ ooohh, so you work at the café huh, That’s good to know” He now has a huge smile on his face, again you now are looking for the blinds. You had a feeling he was going to be up to no good. “ yes, so i’m sorry to cut our time short, maybe we could talk another time.” you say now starting the motion to get up. By the time you have stood up and slowly made your way to the door Narancia had followed you the whole way. “ So your saying if i see you here next time we could have another chat? Or even better, i could ask you out to someplace more fun?” usually you’d be apposed to such offers however, this boy in front of you seemed to genuinely want to get to know you. You couldn’t let him down now. “ i suppose so yes, that would be okay” you answered. “ i’ll be on my way now. Good bye Narancia.” you swiftly left with your bag in hand. Narancia watched your figure disappear, then realizing he hadn’t even got your name, nor your number. how was he supposed to contact you now? he sadly made his way back to his table, he did slouch down this time, upset that he got so excited he forgot the whole reason he went over to you. Feeling dejected. he rested his head in his hands and decided to wait for Fugo.

A couple minutes later He could hear footsteps, assuming them to be Fugo. He instinctively sighed loud on purpose so he’d ask ‘what’s wrong’.

low and behold Fugo could be heard asking “What’s wrong Narancia, it’s not like you to look so dejected.”

“i fumbled”

“what…” was all Fugo said back with a disgusted look on his face.

“Are you sure you fumbled, this piece of paper tells me differently” That was Fugo for you, quickly figuring out the scenario like nothing.

Narancia whips his head up wondering what paper Fugo is talking about. As he looked at Fugo his eyes flickered down to the paper in between Fugos pointer and middle finger. Clearly in the position to hand it to him.

Narancia grabbed the paper more desperately than he would have liked and Fugo just scoffed.

The note read

(xxx-xxx-xxxx)

My name is (y/n) by the way…

Narancia was over the moon, he couldn’t believe he managed to get the number of someone so enthralling. Now he was jumping and hugging Fugo, thanking him for bringing him to the library.

“ Hey Fugo next time can we go to the Café down the street?? what do you think?”

Let’s just say you gained a new regular that day, both at the Cafe and in your life.

almost-blondee

[aceghosts]

Uquiz Roundup

Alright, I've been tagged in several Uquizzes lately, and I'm just going to do them in one post. Here are the links to said Uquizzes:

What kind of suffering are you?

Tell me of your heart and I'll give you a (tragic) love archetype and some advice

what are you doing here?

I've been tagged by @inafieldofdaisies, @voidika, @carlosoliveiraa, @nightbloodbix, @marivenah, @theelderhazelnut, and possibly others.

Since most people have done these, I'll send out a few tags to @bbrocklesnar, @alexxmason, @amalkavian, @captmactavish, @captastra, @clicheantagonist, @fourlittleseedlings, @socially-awkward-skeleton, and @mishwanders. (In the future, if you want to be tagged, feel free to like this post.)

Rooney Shepard

Lonliness

Your heart feels full of the connection you feel you lack. No matter how many people are around you, strangers or not….someone is missing. You don't know who, what, or if you'll ever find them. You're unsure if there's a person out there who'll really satisfy your life, so really what's the point of continuing to look?

(They definitely feel lonely at times, due to expectations placed upon them by themself and others. But I do think Rooney wishes occasionally there was someone who could understand what they're going through.)

04. SUB ROSA

Love is a game of here and there to you. Whether catching glimpse of another's neckline or grazing a knuckle between knocking shoulders of passing by. You have learned to adore in secrecy, the rawness of an outright confession to be spoken a foreign terror. There is ease in pursuing the unavailable, to remain within the space of possibility and nestle the fuzzy words another could say to make or break your day. Instability spun itself into mysterium and while the certainty of love in aging isn't to be forced upon anyone, there is a miniscule part of you testing the limits of ambiguity. Hold down the feeling and settle in the leather seat of a car, kiss the corner of a mouth and say how you feel. Your affection in its vulnerability is to be seen, lift the veil and do not fret when an honest word turns into all you have secretly yearned for. You are meant to be noticed and openly loved.

(So true! It's hard for Rooney to be honest about their romantic feelings.)

drowning (for the sake of it)

You are restless ambition and caffeinated nights. You are dancing-in-the-rain and record-player-breaking-down and god-I-knew-this-would-happen. The world made you the cynic and you cursed the world. You stomped in the mud and now you shout at the sky, but fear it not because you are so much stronger. You must persevere, and survive this night. The next and the next. By and by. You are so much stronger than you think you are. You have a purpose to find within yourself, and it doesn't come from the work you're doing now.

(This feels particularly true for their Cyberpunk universe, especially at the beginning of CP2077 where they feel very jaded.)

Hunter Delaney

Yearning

The pain in your chest bubbles knowing that what you want may never be yours. You're lost in a fantasy world, or consumed by what you wish you were or had as opposed to what you do. It's hard to appreciate what's around you when you're appreciating the hope of what could be instead.

(Spot on. After dying, Hunter yearns for their old life. Eventually, they learn to appreciate the new one.)

07. FATHER'S SON

Breathe down your own neck, it's the sound of smashing fist against furniture in another room again. The wringing hem of cloth and pattern of an escalating heart. Love is tumultous to you. There is grief and disguised forgiveness to damp down the yearning. A permanent fear of tender flesh spilling out, still- you must refrain of growing attached to the fear you had installed into you. Let go of the notion that love is still to be cherished with a hole in the head. Scrub crimson ancestry off wooden floors and try again tomorrow when your hands don't shake cold from the blood loss. Love isn't a fist to escape. Fill the hole in your head with cotton and know you are to be adored. You are deserving of an embrace without flinching.

(Eh, not so sold on this one for Hunter.)

atoning (for someone else)

You are sweet, sweet sorrow. Parting ways at an intersection, an angel's footsteps walking side by side with your own, the shadows of the past looming, looming. You are apologetic-moon-light and loiter-at-the-back-of-the-classroom and stilted-silence and rich-with-life. You are stepping-on-eggshells your way through life, be less careful. Be less careful. You make mistakes, you made mistakes, and you will make mistakes, but imagine growing from them without the wish to go back. Stop restricting yourself. Take a breath of the clean air. Stop breathing in your own secondhand smoke.

(I think this is kind of true. Before dying, Hunter was holding back a lot of themself. Although, now they're more murder-y. So, uh, Good for Them?)

Riley Callahan

The Giver

Your energy depletes as you hand it out to anyone passing by your basket. People walk by and take, but no one ever leaves. You're constantly running on low when people keep asking you to give. You'd give your soul away for free, and then what left do you have of yourself if you can't say no?

(This tracks.)

03. CUPID'S BROTHER

You have been love adjacent all your life. The faint spill of another story that softly grazed your shoulders when stood too close. Whether by design or not, you have yet to build a clear image of what love means to you. The interlocked weaving of a picture locket bound to strand of hair when hugged to tight, the sunpatch that meets your soles in glaring sun dried fields when running with a friend. You are not far from love, but moving between line of collision and avoidance at all times. A faint glimmer on sea lake surface of what could be. There is time to find what you want, find whether it's enough as is. Love is in you, breathing in another day. Continue as you are, realizing the love that is slowly blossoming in your life as it sharpens and clears in brushstrokes.

(It takes Riley a while to realize they are in love. So yeah, this feels pretty on brand.)

shining (for the world)

You are sunshine. You are too bright for this world and you know too much for your experiences. You are not naive, but you are not a cynic. You are not an optimist, but you don't see the point in pessimism. You are bright bells of energy and great pealing laughter and coffee-shop-dates and meet-in-person-lunches and you draw people to you like a magnet with the way you shine. You are bright and drained, drained, drained. You are restless nights, heavy days, broken moons. You deserve a rest. You deserve to release. You cannot carry the weight of the world alone. Share the tasks, be the light, and create the connections.

(Yeah, this absolutely nails Riley.)

Emerson Wright

Despair

The tunnel never had a light. You wish for nothing because you know you'll receive nothing, and your hopes died out long ago. The only thing that keeps you going is the thrill of emptiness you feel when things don't turn out your way. It's bitter. It's proof. Proof that you don't feel this way for nothing.

(Ouch, but yeah, this tracks for Emerson.)

06. CANíBALES; DEVOURER

Love's a knife to skin to you, a vein to woven muscle, blood puddle before you. You listened to all the promises of a stranger's relief and feel the drain of a shower head running it all down again. You committed another murder; kissed and bruised skin with a clench to a quivering wrist and went home in the defeaning quiet of a taxi. There's mold covered rage within you. If to take a heart home with you, you'd bite your way through muscle and ribcage first. Pleasure comes, but there will be no devouring past it. There is fear in settling down and being seen. There is a glass screen between these bodies and you. Relax your tight jaw and feel the real canine fear beneath that scabbed up cavity. The sacrifice of opening up is needed if to be loved as you deeply wish inside. Desire doesn't discriminate between hands or spoken word. Why should you?

(Again, on brand for Emerson. They would rather eat glass than open up.)

drowning (for the sake of it)

You are restless ambition and caffeinated nights. You are dancing-in-the-rain and record-player-breaking-down and god-I-knew-this-would-happen. The world made you the cynic and you cursed the world. You stomped in the mud and now you shout at the sky, but fear it not because you are so much stronger. You must persevere, and survive this night. The next and the next. By and by. You are so much stronger than you think you are. You have a purpose to find within yourself, and it doesn't come from the work you're doing now.

(Interesting that they got the same result as Rooney for this quiz. Emerson is pretty cynical, and I feel like this fits them pretty well.

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

I'm so so so sorry to make a request, I just can't bring myself to write this to calm myself down

How would Eddie respond to an ftm reader that's experiencing something similar to Arthur Havisham's "Why did your father stop loving you?" Scene? The heartbreak when Arthur says "You beat me"

Maybe Jason asks the reader that and he breaks down because he has a terrible relationship with his abusive father

Again I'm so sorry

Sorry for taking so long to get to this! I hope it suffices. I felt bad for how long this took me and I managed to watch snippets of the scene so I feel like there's something I might be missing. Please let me know if this isn't what you were looking for.

Requests have resumed. You can submit yours here!

Currently writing for Eddie Munson. I write for a variety of reader inserts (male, female, gender neutral, readers of color too).

The more details you had to your request, the better it is for me. EX: “What about some fluff for Eddie after he’s had a long day?”

Feel free to look through my masterlist here!

Eddie Munson x Trans!Male!Reader

CW: Mentions of abuse (not actually detailed out); references to binding

_____________________

It's been building--that much you do know.

You don't know when the seal first cracked. You hadn't been paying that close attention to things. But when it all exploded, when the dust settled and you watched from outside yourself, you know that everything, with enough pressure, does have a limit. You are not a superhero, not superhuman, and thus, you too have a limit.

And Jason Carver is that limit.

He's not the exact catalyst. You had your father to blame for that. But Carver is the match in a pile of dynamite. He is the spark--the hammer to come down on the cracked cover.

Only in retrospect does it become clear that maybe when Eddie asked you if you wanted to take Friday night after a game of Dungeons and Dragons just to 'hang out, blow off some steam' that he really was asking you if you were okay.

And you weren't. But you weren't going to burden Eddie with it. Considering he already had enough on his plate. You'd caught in whispers the conversation he had with Wayne when you were over about an extra expense because of the leaky faucet. They weren't in any position to let it continue to be a problem, but it was proving harder for either Wayne or Eddie to fix themselves. "Think he'd fix it cheap?" Eddie had asked. Wayne's reply came evenly, "No, but he'll fix it right."

So no--you were not in a mind to burden Eddie. But the shouting, the searing palms were still pressing down on you. They'd never stopped if you're honest. And you think they never will stop. Nothing is going to give in your favor.

After tucking yourself away in your bedroom, praying that the door you're pressed against doesn't rattle with a pounding fist or foot, you prayed into a seemingly never answering void that you'd survive the week. Jason had decided since Tuesday that you were the object of his displeasure.

It started with jabs at your clothes. Then it's your voice. It feels like anything can be wrong is wrong and Carver's making it a personal mission to point it all out. It wasn't easy to brush it aside. It wasn't fun to have decide if you're going to start a fight or leave it alone. And those your natural inclination may to leave ignorance alone, you lose the choice when you're hiding out at Lover's Lake, trying to let the stars wash over you.

There's a ruckus for a few feet from you. You're going to ignore it. Most people come out here if they're trying to drink. You're not going to bother them. You stay tucked away and hug your knees up to your chest. The group is a little rowdy at first, but they settle down, voices falling from boisterous laughter into broken chuckles and the occasional shout.

It's fine for a little bit. And you're not sure how long you're out there, but the voice get louder again. There's metal cans you can hear now clinking together. Loud groups and alcohol, a recipe for disaster.

"Hey!"

You turn to the voice, only just a little to see part of a body who's calling out to you. You think it's Carver, given the slightly tinniness to his voice. But you don't give it too much thought before you finish brushing the gravel off your butt from where you were sitting.

There's a crunch, the distinct sound of someone running on the rocky shoreline. "Hey, I'm fuck-fucking talking to you!" The words don't fall clearly; they slur, bumping into each other like the syllables don't know their place in the sentence and cadence.

This is only supposed to be a moment to escape, feel at peace for the first fucking time all week. You continue on. No need to give into the drunkenness.

"The fuck, bro. Just slow down!"

You remain silent, pushing onward and the crunch of gravel under the shoes is louder and louder until a hand catches your elbow. "What the fuck? You can't hear?"

The hand comes up to hoodie you've pushed over your head like trying to swat away flies and you realize Jason--clearer closer up--must think you've got headphones on. You push back at his swatting head. "I can choose not to respond," you huff, pushing away from him.

He holds tighter. "I-I want to ask you something."

"Carver, not today," you warn, pulling firm to get your wrist free from his hold.

"I-just listen, please," he begs. And when you look at his face, highlighted by moonlight, you something that looks like it might be an ounce of concern. It doesn't last long because you tug again.

When Carver lets you go, you take a step back your balance off for a moment but you catch yourself. You don't want to cry. But the heat of Carver's touch is still searing into your skin, into the some tender spot you'd been nursing this particular week.

"What does it feel like?"

You shake out your wrist a little, face pinching up into confusion. "What does what feel like?"

Carver only gestures over you. "This--what does it feel like? Like, we all know."

And you're not sure what he's referring too--what it is that everyone knows. There's too many things for the town to know and too many things that the rumor mill always churns. It could almost be anything at this point that he's trying to hint at.

"I--whatever," you retort, but something catches in your chest. You're really not sure what he's referring to.

Carver takes your wrist again and yanks the sleeve up. His hand with the can still in the grasps waves over you again, like he's trying to gesture to something without really giving it away. There's a pause at your torso and you think you know what really is being given away. "Tell me--When do your father stop loving you?"

It cracks--everything you'd been swallowing down. Everything you'd been trying to throw more and more dirt onto to bury comes vomiting back up when you slam your first into Jason's chest. The thud of his chest vibrates up your arm. "Leave it alone!"

"Fuck you. Fuck you for asking that," you huff. "You don't--" but the truth cracks with your voice. "I don't know."

You're not sure when it started or why it started. But you were here now--hiding from everyone. Perhaps even from yourself. You don't know how long you stand their wailing at the boy's body. But you don't feel like it's been long enough. "Fuck you!" you shout. "Fuck you!"

Arms wrap around your waist. Your weight falls into them--not that you have a choice. You're being pulled away. And when the arms don't release you at the tug of your fingers into their forearms, you start thrashing against them. "Hey, hey, it's me! It's Eddie!"

It's only the sound of his name that makes you freeze long enough to blink through the tears. Carver's keeping the rest of the team pushed back away from you, like he maybe he's defending you. But when he turns, his eyes are downturned. Like he hadn't really meant to cause so much a scene. But the damage is done now.

You think you see something that might turn into a bruise on his face--a red spot on his cheek. You're not sure if you did that. But the thought that maybe you did freezes your blood.

"No, no, no, no, no," you whimper.

"It's me, Eddie. Please stop fighting me," Eddie tries again. He'd only come to the Lake when he climbed into your window and noticed your room was empty. You'd left the window unlocked and cracked so it was easier for you to sneak in and out of it.

Eddie used it to his advantage when he wanted to hang out with you, but couldn't through on the phone to ensure you were home. Sometimes, he didn't even feel like dealing with your dad so he'd drive over and just poke his head up into the window.

When he didn't see you in your room and you hadn't mentioned to him going anywhere he had an inclination that you might be here at the lake. Your body is limp now in his arms. Your broken sobs are loud in the night. They echo and echo.

"Talk to me. What happened? What did Carver do?"

"I-it's me," you heave out.

Eddie settles, releasing his arms slowly from around you. "You? What do you mean it's you?"

The words don't come up anymore, just an ugly sob. Eddie does what he can, encasing you now in a hug, face buried into his chest. "It's okay. You're okay now," he returns.

You don't have enough breath. You're heaving and you know it. You'd cried up everything on the walk back to Eddie's van, but now you're heaving. Your chest is on fire. The world is starting to get just a little blurry on the edges. It's not the tears. You know what it is, the pinches at your chest and ribs prominent more now with the excessive physical movement and possibly from Eddie's earlier grasps on you too.

The bandages sting at your skin. Your face is hot with embarrassment and tears.

There lies the wreckage. There it lies.

In the back of the van, Eddie notices your subtle tugs. "How long have you been wearing them?"

"All-all day," you heave.

"You know you can't do that," he reprimands. It's gentle, hand resting on your knee. He's dug out napkins to give to you to wipe the tears and snot from your face.

You only give a half a shrug.

"I'll guard the door, but you have to promise you'll have take the binding off if I do. I won't risk my ass to Carver for nothing."

You can only nod. Everything feels uneasy, shakes in your hands but you can get it undone at least. Eddie takes the affirmative sign and slips back out the backdoors. With a deep breathe, trying to steady your nerves just enough. When your eyes close you see that stupid drop of sincerity on Jason's face and nearly lose it all again.

Why the fuck would he care? Why did it matter to him the shitty life you were living?

The pop of the bandage brings a small bit of relief. You get it loose, not properly off, but you drop your head into the wall of the van and take the good deep inhale. You're not far from the door and when you can get the end of the into a solid grasp from the bottom of your sweatshirt, you tap your foot against the door.

Eddie is quick to crawl back inside. "Took you long enough."

"Can you help?"

There's only a pause, long enough for it to be noticable but not long enough for it feel awkward. "Yeah, of course."

You push up, unwinding a bit more and feed it Eddie. It's not awkward, as the two fo you work the bandage around, more and more bit of relief settling for you. The end of the sweatshirt rides up just a little bit nothing revealing.

"What did you mean by it's you? What the hell happene?"

"Shitty week," you return. "I know Jason's probably drunk but--it's just what he asked me."

Eddie's brow quirks in the silent question. You drop your head back into the wall of the van, the bandage all now completely unraveled. You work it slowly back up around itself into a ball. "He asked when my father stopped loving me. And said 'we all know'. And I don't-" your voice cracks, lifting the ace bandage. "I don't know what he's talking about but is it really that obvious? I don't--I'll die if the wrong people ask. Hell, I might die in my own fucking house."

"You're not. You're not going to die, because I swear to God I'm getting us out of this shitty ass town. Where you can be you've always been. Away from your dad. But you're not dying. Not here."

There's so much conviction in Eddie's tone that you want to believe him.

"But he beats me," you choke out.

Eddie had always suspected but when he asked, you always had an excuse. The thing Eddie wouldn't do is beat a dead horse. Perhaps now, the horse has never been more alive. "You're spending the night with me," Eddie declares, "nothing's going to happen tonight."

Because if you're with him nothing will. If you're with Eddie you're not with your dad, and if your dad comes looking there was more in the Munson trailer and though Eddie never likes resorting to violence, the hunting rifle Wayne used to take hunting was something Eddie had gotten used to shooting.

"Only use it when you absolutely need to, son. Humans aren't deer. But if it's you or someone else and I'm not there, you need to come back to me alive."

Perhaps Wayne would allow Eddie the grace to extend the sentiments to you. Because if it's you or someone else, Eddie needs you alive.

"I'm going to keep you alive," Eddie states. "Even if it means forcing you out of your binder kicking and screaming or hauling you off people when you snap, I'm keeping your ass alive."

-H

[the-inkwell-variable]

𝔉𝔯𝔬𝔪 ℭ𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔳𝔞𝔩 𝔱𝔬 ℭ𝔥𝔞𝔪𝔬𝔪𝔦𝔩𝔢

CHAPTER 2

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ'ꜱ ɴᴏᴛᴇꜱ - - - ʜᴇʀᴇ'ꜱ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ 2! ꜰᴏʟʟᴏᴡ ᴀᴍᴀʀᴀ ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴇɴᴅʀʏᴋ ᴀꜱ ᴛʜᴇʏ'ʀᴇ ꜰᴏʀᴄᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ꜰʟᴇᴇ ꜱᴜᴅᴅᴇɴʟʏ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ʜᴏᴍᴇ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍɪᴅᴅʟᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ! ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴀ ꜱᴄᴀɴᴅᴀʟ! ɪ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴇᴄᴏɴᴅ ɪɴꜱᴛᴀʟʟᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴏꜰ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴄᴀʀɴɪᴠᴀʟ ᴛᴏ ᴄʜᴀᴍᴏᴍɪʟᴇ!

ᴛᴀɢ ʟɪꜱᴛ - - - ᴘᴍ ᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴀᴅᴅᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴀɢ ʟɪꜱᴛ!

p r e v i o u s . c h a p t e r | n e x t . c h a p t e r

She wouldn't call herself 'depressed', exactly. She still enjoyed the rise of the morning suns, one after the other, like schoolchildren in a neat row. Slop tasted the same as it always had - oily, yet somehow dry, with a hint of grassy aftertaste. Even her nightly act in the big top was running smoothly, which was saying something because, though illusions, tigers were still tigers.

No, if she sat down and had a logical think about it, all of her stress boiled down to the discrepancies in The Book.

Money missing from the ledgers was nothing new. Luc Poirier had been skimming from the top since long before he'd dragged her and Hendryk from the swamp a decade ago. But recently, it was getting harder and harder to hide the increasing amount of missing money in the ledgers. Fraudulent arithmatic may have been her strong suit, but the numbers were pointing to a worrying crimson flag that would alarm even the ever-optimistic Hendryk.

Or it would, if he would stop and listen for a moment.

"Hendryk, I'm telling you, something isn't right."

His axe slammed into the log, splitting it cleanly in two. "Luc's skimming is the worst kept secret in the carnival. Even Truffles knows about it, and she spends most of her day with her nose in the dirt. You're getting your tail in a twist over nothing."

"You're not listening to me. He's taking more and more every time, and he's disregarding the patterns we use to hide it! It's like he doesn't care if he gets caught anymore!"

He set another leg on the stump before dropping the head of the axe to the ground with a dull thump. His coal red eyes studied her as she paced back and forth in front of him, wringing her hands with every step. "Amara," he drawled, wiping the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. "You're wearing a groove into my grass. Take a breath."

She wanted to stamp. To scream. To grab him by his curved horns and shake some sense into his thick skull.

Instead, she took a breath.

"You'll see," she warned him in a voice so quiet it forced him to meet her gaze. "Something bad is about to happen. I can feel it." With that, she turned and walked away, ignoring the way his eyes burned the back of her head.

It didn't take long. She'd no sooner snuffed the candle in front of her caravan when the door burst open. Hendryk's face was ashen rather than its usual state blue. "Necessities only."

Amara blinked at him, hands frozen in place over her half-undone braided bun. "What?"

He grabbed her arms.

"Hendryk, you're hurting me!"

He released her to shove an empty travelling pack into her arms. "Mother says Lolth is due her prayers."

Amara's eyes widened as her blood ran cold. She'd always known she'd hear their secret passcode to flee again, but here? Now? "Whats happened?" she gasped, throwing herself to her feet.

"Not now. No time." He grabbed things, seemingly at random, and thrust them into her pack - a toothbrush, a plush Octopus, a worn notebook. She joined him in his panic, throwing off her dressing gown to snatch the closest outfit. He didn't look and she didn't care. Apparently there was no time for modesty.

No sooner was her bodice buttoned than he threw her cloak over her shoulders. "Out the window," he ordered.

"Lantern!"

"Do you want to be followed? C'mon, we gotta go!"

He jerked the bay window open, knocking over a small stack of books. Amara clambered over the bench beside them and out the window. Her skirt caught on a splinter - she tore it free, leaving a patch of wool behind. When she paused to look behind her, Hendryk shouted, "Keep going! I'll catch up! Don't look back!" Her gut told her not to - told her to turn back and find him.

She kept running.

It didn't take long for shouting to reach her - not the angry shouts of pursuers but panicked cries. Once again her instincts urged her to stop, but she forced herself onward. Thistles tore at her ankles. Branches scratched her face and blocked her view. All around her, the sounds of the night pressed closer and closer, suffocating her.

She kept running.

It wasn't far to the river - perhaps a forty-five minute casual stroll, half an hour if the walk was brisk. Tonight, at a full sprint, it felt like hours. Amara collapsed onto her knees in the first dredges of water, soaking her skirt clean through. Her breath came in agonized wheezes. Each inhale burned her chest like hot sand. Her hands shook as she scooped some icy water to her lips.

But she couldn't focus on any of that. All she could think about was her brother. Where was he? What was taking so long to get here? Why had he rushed her away like this?

Was he okay?

As her breathing slowed, she realized that the air was stale, rife with mildew and a hint of smoke. The eastern horizon glowed crimson, but the suns had only set an hour ago. Fire? It had to be. The carnival was ablaze.

She had to go back. Hendryk's warning rang in her ears, yet her feet forced her upright, forced her forward. She couldn't leave him behind. It had always been the two of them against the world - leaving Hendryk behind was not an option.

The bushes before her rustled. She froze for a moment, staring into the darkness behind the leaves. "Hendryk?" she called softly. It could be him - but it could be something else. These woods were still wild, untamed by the local lord. It was just as possible that she was walking into the maw of a bear. Or a direwolf. Or a minotaur...

Thick red arms shot out of the bush. A large hand camped over her mouth, blocking her startled scream. The other gripped her bodice and jerked her into the bush. It pulled her flush against what felt like a muscular body and didn't let go. "Quiet," rumbled a voice in her ear. "Don't let them hear you."

Amara tried to thrash, but the man gripped her far too tight. Her teeth snapped fruitlessly against the hand over her mouth. Whoever this was much larger and stronger than her - was this the threat Hendryk had sent her fleeing from? The very thought sent chills across her body.

Before her, a wood elf barreled into the clearing. Even from behind, she recognized him as Luc's newest security guard, though she couldn't recall his name. She dug her nails into her attacker's wrist and screamed until her throat cracked.

His grip tightened. "Quiet, girl - that elf is not your friend."

The elf glanced around the clearing, his silver eyes sweeping over the bush she was sequestered in. See me! she silently pleaded, but he turned to stare over the river instead. A strange chirp interrupted his reverie, and from his belt he procured a flat slab of stone with glowing blue sigils etched upon its surface - a sending stone.

"Footprints stop at the river," he said into the stone. "It's possible she tried to cross here and drowned, but I find it more likely that she's following the river south to Boltangate."

The voice that responded, though distorted and crackling by the magic of the stone, was intimately familiar. Amara's heart leapt into her throat as Luc Poirier's voice echoed through the clearing. "She's brighter than you give her credit for, Eloetin. She's still alive. Follow the river. Don't come back without her or my money."

Her assailant held her until they could no longer hear Eloetin's footsteps, then released her unceremoniously. She staggered back to balance. It took a moment for her to realize that it was not a man that had grabbed her but a tall stout woman - one she recognized. Anne Twoorb stared down at her with no malice in her brilliant cyan eyes.

Amara took a step back, magic tingling her fingertips. The crimson half-orc before her had been working for Luc for years. Yes, she'd saved her from Eloetin - but what if she just wanted full credit for the capture? Her magic would be no good against Anne's natural magic-repelling skin. She was defenseless.

Anne raised her empty hands, her expression as stoic as ever. "I have no intention of turning you in. I know you didn't take the money."

"What are you talking about?" Amara demanded, taking another step back.

Before Anne could speak, another figure stumbled into their brush. Hendryk grinned down at her, ashes darkening his cobalt face. "I knew you'd make it. Had every confidence." He glanced up at Anne. "Anything?"

"Eloetin. He believes you are fleeing to Boltangate."

"Then we'll go north to Verthurst." Hendryk adjusted the sack in his arms. Amara shot it a frown - it was no travel pack and too heavy to merely be travel supplies. Surely it wasn't... surely Hendryk hadn't...

But before she could ask, Anne shoved another pack into her arms. "Go, before Luc sends more people after you. Move carefully, and leave no tracks. You carry precious cargo now." She gave Hendryk an affectionate pat on the shoulder and vanished down the path he'd come from.

Amara snapped her attention to her brother. "Will someone please tell me what is going on here?!" she demanded, hating the way her voice cracked and wavered. "You send me running through the forest in the dead of night - Luc's guards are after us - the carnival seems to be on fire! And now we're on the run, and I seem to be the only one who's been kept out of the loop!"

Hendryk reached out to brush an ivory curl from her forehead. "Amara, you're hysterical."

"Yes! I am! My entire life has been turned upside-down again, and this time, I don't even get the courtesy of knowing why! At least when we fled the Underdark, I knew why!"

Hendryk stepped forward and clasped her cheeks hard enough to pinch. "Amara. Do you trust me?"

"With my life." But the words rang hollow in her ears.

If Hendryk noticed, he didn't show it. He flashed her his trademark lopsided grin and hefted the suspicious bag to his shoulder. "Then let me handle this. I've got this. Let's go, before he sends someone else." He offered his hand.

She took it, feeling rather like she's just taken a leaky lifeboat in a typhoon.

[sleepyzenpanda]

“The Good Left Undone” by Rise Against has Kanej vibes

Hear me out! While I know it’s not really a love song nor is it the type of song fans think of when shipping, being alt-rock and all, when I was listening to it today it struck me that the lyrics could be perceived as an introspection from Kaz’s perspective on how his feelings for Inej have changed him and his thoughts on letting her be free

My thoughts on the song below the cut

In fields where nothing grew but weeds

I found a flower at my feet

Bending there in my direction

I wrapped a hand around its stem

I pulled until the roots gave in

Finding now what I've been missing

In the first verse Kaz is was living a solitary life and hasn’t truly let anyone in since Jodie’s death. But then he found Inej in the Menagerie and realized that in his solitude he was missing out on life (and love)

“In fields where nothing grew but weeds,” - The barren field can symbolize either Kaz’s heart prior to meeting Inej or it can symbolize Inej being forcefully indentured to the Menagerie, a place that destroys souls

“I found a flower at my feet,” / “Bending there in my direction,” - Yet Inej’s spirit had not been completely broken by her time at the Menagerie. Tante Heleen told Inej to entertain Kaz probably hoping Inej could get some information on the Bastard of the Barrel Heleen could use to her advantage so Inej had silently been following Kaz

He offered her an option to leave with and work for him instead of being forced to sell herself at the Menagerie. She agreed and he bought her indenture and took her from that horrible place

“Finding now what I've been missing,” - After getting to know Inej Kaz came to appreciate her for her talents and as a person. He had been living with his heart closed off, yet he grew fond of her

But I know

So I tell myself, I tell myself it's wrong

There's a point we pass from which we can't return

I felt the cold rain of the coming storm

“There's a point we pass from which we can't return,” - But due to Kaz’s trauma and resulting aversion to touch he has an immensely difficult time letting anyone in. No matter how much he may want to open himself up to Inej and let whatever is between them grow, he believes he’s far to damaged

All because of you

I haven't slept in so long

When I do I dream of drowning in the ocean

Longing for the shore where I can lay my head down

I'll follow your voice

All you have to do is shout it out

“When I do I dream of drowning in the ocean,” - Kaz spent days on Reapers Barge with the body of his dead brother. In the books he even had to use Jordie’s dead body as a float to swim back to shore because he was too small and weak from illness to make the long swim by himself. I cannot imagine how traumatic that would be

“Longing for the shore where I can lay my head down,�� - But now when he finds that he wants to open up to Inej he’s haunted by the ghosts of his past. He had been alone for so long and wants someone he can feel safe enough to be vulnerable with. To finally be human and not just the Bastard of the Barrel. But does he even deserve happiness when Jordie’s dead?

“I'll follow your voice,” - Inej believes he does and he wants to believe her

Inside my hands these petals browned

Dried up, falling to the ground

But it was already too late now

I pushed my fingers through the earth

Returned this flower to the dirt

So it could live; I walk away now

“Inside my hands these petals browned,” - Though he loves Inej if he selfishly keeps her by his side she will wither, just as she would have if she stayed at the Menagerie. Maybe not as soon, but eventually because he believes he destroys everything he touches

“It was already too late now,” - Inej loves Kaz as well, but she cannot be with him if he’s not willing to open himself up and be vulnerable with her. As much as Kaz tries to do this he finds himself unable to do so. He believes he is far too damaged

“Returned this flower to the dirt,” / “So it could live; I walk away now,” - Kaz knows Inej desires true freedom and to reunite with her family and he believes she deserves that. So he gave Inej her freedom. Their contract no longer binding her to him. With the freedom to go anywhere and do anything she pleases Inej can finally blossom

But I know

Not a day goes by that I don't feel its burn

There's a point we pass from which we can't return

I felt the cold rain of the coming storm

“Not a day goes by that I don't feel its burn,” - Not a day goes by where Kaz does not think of Inej and his feelings for her. And for someone who closed himself off to everyone, even his own emotions, the feelings are finally bleeding through and they hurt! He feels the burn of his love for her and the regret of not believing he’s good enough for her. And he hates himself for it

“There's a point we pass from which we can't return,” - Kaz is truly in love with Inej and he cannot go back to closing himself and his emotions off to the world. And he’s trying for her. But will it ever be enough?

All because of you

All because of you

“All because of you,” - All because of Inej Kaz had changed as a person. Because of her he’s grown to care for others (his Crows) as well. Even how he approaches the world as a criminal had changed. He considers how Inej would act and what she would think of his actions and has become softer

All because of you

I haven't slept in so long

When I do I dream of drowning in the ocean

Longing for the shore where I can lay my head down

Inside these arms of yours

“I haven't slept in so long,” - I imagine Kaz has had trouble sleeping since Jordie’s death, maybe even his father’s death, as that was also pretty traumatic. But now his feelings for Inej also keep him awake

“Inside these arms of yours,” - Kaz truly wants to be able to touch, hold, and be held by Inej. But between both of their trauma it’s very challenging. In their time together Inej has grown and is willing to open herself up to him, but so far he has not been able to. But he wants to. He’s willing to work on opening up for her

All because of you

I believe in angels

Not the kind with wings

No, not the kind with halos

The kind that bring you home

When home becomes a strange place

I'll follow your voice

All you have to do is shout it out

“I believe in angels,” / “Not the kind with wings,” / “No, not the kind with halos,” - Kaz is not a spiritual person. He doesn’t believe in Inej’s saints or Ghezen. But he believes in Inej. Inej has preformed a miracle that Kaz thought impossible, she made him feel something again and he wants to be worthy of her love

“All you have to do is shout it out,” - All Inej had to do was ask and he was willing to change for her. He may not have conquered his demons yet and he may not yet believe he’s worthy of her love, but he’s trying for her. He waits for the day when she will return and silently hopes by then he’ll be able to open up to her and finally be worthy of her love

If you look at the song from that perspective “The Good Left Undone,” can indeed be viewed as a Kanej song. Maybe not a love song per se, but it definitely has Kanej vibes and will give you the feels! Let me know if you all have any other suggestions for alt-rock songs that have Six of Crows vibes especially wesper

I’ve added the Spotify link to the song below

[worldserasingandcreatinginmymind]

No Business Like Show Business | Part Four

Series Summary: you work backstage at a theatre and become close with the star of the show (who you may also have a slight crush on)

Pairing: James McAvoy x reader

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: like 2 swear words I think..? also not proof read because its 12.30am and I need to sleep but I really wanted to just get this out there so sorry if its shit

A/N: wow whoops how is it almost a year since I last updated this story?? I am so SO sorry, its been a difficult year but honestly THANK YOU for the comments and messages about this series. You guys keep me motivated to keep writing so thank you thank you thank you!! Feel free to substitute James for any actor of your choosing. Also, spelling and grammar is not my strongest skill so please be kind :)

Part Three | Masterlist

- - - - -

Sooooo, James McAvoy kissed me… I know right? WHAT?! 

Is this real life? Am I dreaming? Have I fallen through a wormhole into some alternate reality? 

All I know for sure is, Vera is bloody good at playing Cupid.  

— — — — 

Walking into the work the next morning you can’t help smile. Getting kissed by James McAvoy certainly has a way of putting a spring in your step. As you approach the theatre you notice more people hanging around than usual. There’s normally one or two guys with cameras hoping to catch a glimpse of James or Anastasia, but today there’s a whole group. And even more unusual is, they’re actually paying attention to you. 

“It’s her! Over here love!” 

“Flash us a smile?”

You shield your eyes as cameras flash brightly in your face, disorientating you as you try to reach the theatre door.

“How long have you been dating James?”

“What does Anastasia think about your affair?”

“Leave her alone!” A voice cuts through the noise as an arm comes around you and directs you safely inside. “Should be ashamed of yourselves, shouting at a young girl like that. Vultures!” Vera shouts before slamming the theatre door shut and turning to you “Are you alright?” 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine” you reply, even though your hands are shaking. “What the hell just happened? Why do they suddenly care about me?”

“You haven’t seen?” Vera asks, reaching into her bag and pulling out a magazine which she hands to you. There on the front cover is a photo of your face staring back at you. 

“What the…” you say in shock as you read the caption ‘meet the mystery girl who stole James’ heart’ along side a photo of the two of you smiling at each other in the coffee shop. “This is mental”

“It gets worse” Vera says as she opens the magazine to the article in which details about you have even printed for anyone to read along side a couple of your selfies taken from your instagram account. They found out your age, where you grew up, where you studied. 

“This is madness! It was just coffee, surely no one actually cares this much about who I am?”

“Just coffee..?” Vera asks “Because I have to say you do look quite cosy there”

“Well-”

“Miss Y/L/N!” Alan the director calls from down the corridor, startling you “A word please.” A statement, not a question.

You nod, taking a breath before heading down to meet him. He leads you into his office and closes the door, gesturing for you to take a seat. You notice a copy of the magazine on his desk. 

“Care to explain what’s going on here?” He picks up the magazine, pointing to the photo of you and James. 

“We went to get coffee” you reply simply, not quite understanding what all the fuss is about. 

Alan opens the magazine and begins to read “McAvoy and his new girl were spotted getting close as they talked and giggled together in cafe nero, leaving us to wonder if his relationship with girlfriend and theatre co-star Anastasia is in trouble. We cant wait to see how this backstage drama plays out.”

“Like I said, we just got coffee. People recognised James, saw me with him and put two and two together to get five.”

“Well I hope the coffee was worth it because I’m going to have to pull you from the production team.” 

“What?! No, Alan, sir, please-”

“I’m sorry Y/N, I’ll arrange someone to cover you”

“Alan?” James bursts through the door “sorry to interrupt but you can’t replace Y/N, she’s done nothing wrong. Its my fault we were there, I asked her to come. It was supposed to be a group thing but everyone else dropped out.” 

You feel your heart flutter at the fact he’s covering for you, even if he is bending the truth slightly.

“Look James, I understand it may have been a mistake but I cant risk this love triangle of yours effecting the show.” 

“There is no love triangle.” James laughs “All this is is two colleagues having a drink after work”

‘Colleagues’? You think to yourself, has he forgotten the kiss you shared after?

“Oh come on, you have to admit these photos look rather cosy” Alan points to the magazine.

“It was loud in there, we had to lean in close to be able to hear each other. It’s not Y/N’s fault that people are seeing something that isn’t there!”

You feel your heart sink as the words ‘something that isn’t there’ play on repeat in your mind.

“Fine, you can stay.” Alan’s voice pulls you back out of your thoughts. “But you’ll have to tell Anastasia” he directs the last bit to James who rolls his eyes. 

“So this was her idea then” James says.

“She’s just concerned about how this negative press could affect ticket sales.”

“That’s bullshit Alan and you know it!” The anger in James’ voice surprises you. You would never dream of talking to a director like that. “You’ve said yourself there’s no such thing as ‘negative press’. As long as people are talking about the play then people will come to see the play. Your words, not mine.” 

“I know” Alan sighs. 

“Ana is just jealous and looking to stir trouble, that’s what she does.”

“Yes but we need her.”

“Do we?” James asks, and a silence fills the room. You awkwardly glance between the two men, feeling uncomfortable being in the middle of this heated conversation. 

You clear your throat, causing Alan and James to look at you. For a moment you think they may have forgotten you were still there. “Can I go?” You ask. 

“Yes of course, apologies Y/N. You must have work to be getting on with.” 

You give a small nod and get the hell out of that room as fast as you can. 

— — — — 

You give yourself ten minutes to just sit when you get to the props room, head on the desk just processing the past 24 hours. 

James kissed you. Paparazzi are obsessing over you. Alan nearly fired you. 

“Hello dear- ooh, are you alright?” Vera’s voice fills the room, you didn’t realise you’d left the door open. 

“Yeah” you say sitting yourself back up in your chair. 

“Really?” 

“…no.” you respond honestly.

“What happened daring?” Vera takes a seat on the chair next to you. “I heard raising voices when I passed Alan’s office on the way here.” 

“Alan wanted to remove me from the production team. James stepped in and basically saved my job.” 

“Oh, well at least you're still here. That’s a good thing.” 

“Yeah, but he also said some things that I don't know how to feel about.” 

“Alan?” 

“No, James. He said we’re just colleagues and there’s nothing between us but yesterday at the cafe it kinda felt like a date and then when we got back here he kissed me so now I just really don't know-” 

“He kissed you!!”Vera interrupts, a mix of shock and glee on her face. You forgot you hadn’t had chance to tell her yet. 

“Yeah, but then he said all that-“

“That doesn’t matter darling, he was probably just saying that to Alan to keep you here. Have you talked to him?” 

“No, I haven’t been able to. This morning as not gone to plan at all.” 

“Well then I wouldn’t worry about it just yet. You need to speak to him.” 

“Hello?” James voice calls as he appears at the door. 

“Speak of the devil” Vera whispers to you with a cheeky smile as she gets up from her chair “Hello James dear”

“Don’t let me interrupt you” 

“No not at all, I was just leaving. See you later Y/N” she winks before disappearing out the room, closing the door behind her. 

James watches her and turns to you. There’s a brief silence a the two of you just look at each other, a small smile on your faces. 

“So I-” “I should-” you both say at the same time, making you both laugh. 

“Sorry you were saying?” You ask.

“No no, you go” he replies. 

“Okay, uh.. I just wanted to say thank you for sticking up for me with Alan.” 

“Of course, there was no way I would let him fire you.” 

“I don't think he would have fired me, but he was definitely about to remove from this production.”

“Oh! Well in that case…” James jokes and you playfully hit him on the arm “I’m kidding, I’m glad you're still on the team.”

“Yeah me too.” you say absentmindedly fiddling with a pen you found on the desk. He places a hand on top of yours, causing you to look at him.

“And I know it got you in trouble, but I really enjoyed our coffee yesterday.”

“It was good coffee” you say sarcastically. 

“You know what I mean…” he says with a laugh. 

“Do I?” You ask, pulling your hands away as you sit back in your chair and look at him “cause I’m picking up on some mixed signals here” 

“Was kissing you not a clear enough signal?”

“Well I thought it was, but then you said that we were just colleagues and that there was nothing between us”

“What? When did I say that?” He is genuinely confused.

“This morning, in Alan’s office. You said that people were seeing something that wasn’t there! So I got the hint that you didn’t actually like me and maybe you regretted kissing me or maybe you just kiss everyone like that-”

“Y/N” he takes your face in his hands, forcing you to look at him “What I said to Alan I said because I didn’t want you to lose your job. I didn’t mean it. Just like I do not kiss everyone the way I kissed you and I most definitely do not regret it.” He smiles at you the most genuine, warm smile which makes you smile back. “I really like you Y/N, and I would really like to kiss you again. If you’ll let me..?” 

He searches your eyes and as soon as you nod he leans in and gives you the most tender kiss you’ve ever received. You melt into him completely, but suddenly pull away. 

“Wait, what about Anastasia? I don't want to be part of some love triangle.” 

“There is no triangle Y/N. Ana and I are not together.” 

“But the papers said-”

“It’s fake news, set up by the people in charge of the theatre’s publicity. They think more people will want to buy tickets for the show if the lead actors are dating. It’s bullshit I know, but I’ve been forbidden from setting the story straight until after the show closes.” He pauses, giving you a second to take in what he’s explained “I understand if this is too complicated, you shouldn’t have to be dragged into this mess and I wouldn’t blame you if you told me to get lost-“

Now its your turn to interrupt him. You pull him into you and kiss him, passionately. 

Eventually you pull apart slightly, wrapping your arms behind his neck and looking up at him. “Was that a clear enough signal for you?” You joke.

“Hmm, I’m not sure. I think you need to show me again” he winks and you return to your new favourite hobby; kissing James McAvoy… 

Part Five

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