#wip: htkag

[lady-grace-pens]

How to Kill a God needs beta readers for draft 3!

It’s been eight years since the death of renowned explorer Indigo Haze. It seems like everyone in the world has has made peace with his passing. Everyone except for 18 year old Allister Haze, who clings to his father’s journal to keep his memory alive. Grief has trapped him inside a comfortable bubble, and he isn’t willing to look beyond it to see how it’s causing more harm than it is good.

That’s when the journal goes missing at the hands of his twin brother Preston, who only wishes Allister would look to the future instead of living in the past and longing for what could’ve been.

Allister, distressed by his brother’s betrayal, uses this as an opportunity to exact revenge upon him by uncovering a secret Preston has been dangling underneath his nose. This launches the boys into a series of bloody betrayals, each one growing more vile than the last.

How far will they go to destroy each other? Could this be the end of their relationship, or is there a way for them to unite and become brothers once more?

—

Genre: A contemporary literary fiction with high drama and elements of a thriller. Upper ya/na. Underlying flavor of fantasy/spirituality.

CW: Death, grief, some smoking, drinking, strong language, depression, and therapy.

Point of View: First person, present tense, lightly stream of consciousness.

Includes: A bit of found family, a childhood friends to lovers slow burn, secrets, betrayals, wrestling with religious beliefs, horse racing, brotherly love and the bond of twins, a dramatic male protagonist with a plethora of colorful emotions, and much more!

Length: 240k words

Who/What I’m looking for:

General feedback, no particular questions. Looking at anything the reader wants to bring my attention to.

My ideal timeframe for reading is within 2-3 months.

Some level of experience with beta reading is preferred.

Anyone who is genuinely interested in this story and has the time to dedicate to beta reading.

Playlist

—

DM me if interested! Boosts are appreciated!

[autistic-gay-men-kissing]

Sketch

June Bug (left) Victoria Seekrett (right)

she/her for both

[lady-grace-pens]

Hey I made the HTKAG gang in Picrew!

In light of my spur of the moment decision to rewrite this babe, and since I’ve gotten a bunch of new followers (hi! <3) I figure I should reintroduce them to y’all so you get an idea of who they are. This starts from the top left, top right, bottom left, etc.

•••

Allister

Sentimental, sensitive, caring, extroverted, passionate. Often alights himself in fits of passion which he tends to lose himself in. He’s emotional, and proud of it. Glitter tears are a regular part of his wardrobe. However, sometimes his sweeping, dramatic nature proves to be a bit… much for those around him. He adores nature, horse racing, and playing piano, but nothing means more to him than his twin brother Preston.

Preston

Intelligent, rational, patient, quiet, romantic. An introvert who cares in his own way, which often draws the line of protectiveness, as he thinks he knows best for those around him. He’s an advocate for focusing on the present and the future, and not allowing yourself to be overcome by the chains of emotions and history. He’s a man of many interests: horse racing with his brother, academia, and playing the pipe organ.

Maddie

Ever the ballerina she is, Maddie is cautious, gentle, quiet, sensitive, idealistic, determined, and she has a tendency to be self absorbed. She has fashion dreams of living in Paris, working with her designer mother. She adores her home all the same. Her religion, friends, and family mean a lot to her. She and Preston dated a few years back, but she’s with Allister now.

Mak

Maddie’s sister! Mak is an outgoing, fun-loving, goofy ball of energy. She’s the type who would race shopping carts down the isle of a grocery store with Allister, while Maddie and Preston stare in mutual shame at their siblings. She’s an artist, specializing in abstract paintings and the occasional sculpture. Mak dreams of having her own art studio in the city. She’s often seen as immature, but she’s actually wise, thoughtful, deeply caring, and a good listener. She often feels left in the shadows of her sister’s limelight, but that doesn’t make her love her any less. She and Preston are currently dating.

[lady-grace-pens]

In light of the rewrite, I jazzed up the twins’ moodboards and gave Maddie and Mak new ones entirely. Mak’s the only ones edited heavily because it helps balance out the tones. Allister just has color enhancements for funsies lol

Left to right it’s Preston, Allister, Maddie, then Mak. I have short intros to each of their characters in this post here

Obligatory all pics used come from Pinterest, I only own the collages

[lady-grace-pens]

After lots of bashing my brain with a stick and hoping something would come out, it did kinda!

In my desperate search for a plot of the htkag rewrite, I’m shifting back to the source of the matter

Tragedy

I, once again, want to DESTROY Allister’s life - no, make HIM destroy his own life just like Scrooge’s plight playing out in real time. Except more pitiable, less inherently evil. Idk. I’ll work out the specifics with time. I’m just so incredibly relieved to have some sort of direction to flow in now.

[lady-grace-pens]

💬

Hi there! Thank you so much for the ask 💛

This one is a tad long, but I think it’s really beautiful. I absolutely love it when characters describe other characters who are dear to them, but they use things, nouns instead of adjectives, just like this. It’s so sweet and perfectly expresses their close bond, in this case being that of twin brothers.

Hope you had a lovely day today and thanks again 💛

—

I feel him in the cool spring air. Through the wind’s gentle sighs, I swear I can almost hear his voice. Muffled, broken semblances of words… only a mile away.

His presence is in everything and nothing at the exact same time. I can’t look at the sky without catching a glimpse of his coat. In the sunlight glimmering through the treetops, I see his hair, and his eyes in the way the ocean breathes, the salt it flings into the air… Pranks and practical jokes, children’s laughter, strangers’ toothy grins, and - and of course nearly every horse I see. Especially the ones whose coats are dominated by white.

Everywhere. He is absolutely fucking everywhere, yet just out of sight. Dancing in the shadows of my vision. Calling my name and snickering. Playing jokes with me in spite of his absence.

[lady-grace-pens]

💬 ^_^

Hello! Friendo!! How are you? Hoping all is well 💛

Since you beta read draft 1 of htkag, I shall give you a new and shiny little tidbit I added in my current draft that I’m very fond of. I’m fond of the entire scene really, so it was difficult to muddle it down lol. Hence why this is more of a scene snippet than a quote but uh… shhhh it’s totally fine rules only exist to be broken blah blah go punk rock! Woo!

Anyways, here we go!

—

Preston collapses at the foot of my bed. His knees are forced to carry the weight of his chin and hear his quiet sobs, just as I am.

Oh goddess, I can’t imagine a worse punishment than this. My brother, most treasured… My… My twin is… He’s fucking sobbing in front of me and all I can do is watch. I can’t even show him how my tears fall, I…

Oh goddess. Oh my goddess, what have we become?

In any other circumstance, I’d expect crying with my brother to be a healing experience. Something to draw us closer together. Yet as we sit here now, I couldn’t feel any farther apart from him. I look at him through red, puffy eyes and I see a stranger. I see the death of our bond personified. I see all of the tears, the screams, and heartaches that creep within, clawing at the ice surrounding my heart. I see… I see…

I see myself.

In this divine torture disguised as an atrocious revelation, I’m forced to sit for far longer than even I think I deserve. And that’s speaking miles, considering the many hells I’ve imagined for myself these past few weeks.

[lady-grace-pens]

💬!!! :^D

Hello hello! Hope you’re having a nice night tonight. Thank you as always for the ask 💛 For you, I have chosen a little tidbit from one of my favorite scenes. Very dramatic, very angsty, but hey. I’m always a slut for characters feelings things 😌

—

“Liar,” I growl. “ Liar, you want to see me suffer. We both know you do, so stop fucking lying for once! Stop hiding shit from me! Just get out with it, say it! Say you want me dead! Say you hate my guts! Say you want to break me, say you want to shatter every piece of me and drain me of every ounce of blood that I carry! Say it Preston! Stop-”

[lady-grace-pens]

What if I rewrite htkag into a love story lmao

[lady-grace-pens]

💬💬💬

PS : Tell those insecurity gremlins to fuck right off 🖤

Thank you so much ❤️ I’ll definitely try to. Doing this actually has helped a bit! It was a really nice refresher to see the bits in my story I love dearly. I’m not sure if it’ll solve things, but it might lighten the burden some. Thank you again, and I hope some great news comes your way soon! :)

—

“The wars between brothers are often bitter. Nothing good will come of this, boys. Nothing. It’s a rocky mountain you’re trekking on. And I fear… We all fear that at any moment now, you might just push one another off the edge.”

“Then push each other off the edge we shall.” I declare before storming off to the front doors.

—

"You know, I…” he huffs, his head drawn to his lap. “I don't even know why I’m trying with you. You just destroyed my life and that's all you have to say. Nothing at all.”

… I'm sorry, I… I…

I can't even say it for Fate’s sake. He’s right, he’s… He’s always…

—

His voice rings low, rough, and sore from last night’s breakdown. “Roll o’er the hills and back, only to try again…”

[autistic-gay-men-kissing]

Snapped and finally started drawing Maan. Idk how I feel about her but it’s just the first version of her so it’s fineee

Kinda tempted to make the goddess like, below average height. But she floats and stuff.

[lady-grace-pens]

Even the Night Breaks: A WIP Intro

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Pinterest Board | Spotify Playlist |

Genre:

New Adult | Contemporary Low Fantasy | Upmarket Fiction (probably)

Status:

Drafting

POV:

First person, present tense

CW:

Mental health is a large focus (depression), cursing, drinking, some smoking, some drug usage, and faint talk of religion (Christianity).

Themes and Tropes:

Mental Heath (as stated). The struggle of feeling lost, and not having a future. Vulnerability issues. A royal family who is very very dysfunctional, and vengeance (which are two completely unrelated things pssh totally). The once shattered bond of brothers being repaired. A found family of edgy early 20 somethings. Girlie with a dagger obsession. Polyamory (kind of.) Elemental magic and how it might battle with society and religion. Discovering and accepting what it’s like to truly, genuine love someone in a sense that far surpasses romance.

Vibes:

The faint smell of smoke and weed staining a shirt, covered up hastily by cheap cologne. A meticulously taken care of leather jacket. Nighttime, the rain, neon lights, and grins. Morning coffee and brunch. The woods. Autumn. A small town. Glares from strangers as you walk down the street. Nights at local bar, where you’ve spent so much time that you’ve befriended the owner. Late night talks. Heavy laughter. The pressing weight of the royal crown. A lonely apartment shrouded in darkness.

Setting:

A world like Earth, but what if people just randomly started getting born with elemental powers?

Plot:

For 20 year old Constantine Dodge, the eldest prince of Essledor, being king means death. Everything about it, from royal life itself, to the prospect of being the sole person responsible for the lives of millions of people. Above them all reigns the wretched idea of falling in line with his father, King Anon, either beloved or beloathed due to his handling of the Magikal Mutation Epidemic. Who knew forcing everyone who is suddenly developing elemental powers into arenas and making them fight each other to death under the guise of “scientific research” would be a controversial decision?

Simple to say, Constantine is far more content living with his best friends, Blake and Rebekah, in the little town of Dunsbrew. As much as he tries to shoulder his burdens alone, no card game, no woman’s bed, no bottle of alcohol can cleanse him from the topic of his questionable future, if he even has one. That fact becomes much more apparent when looking at his younger brother Teddy, who pines for the throne and flings himself into the role of prince, at the expense of a healthy relationship with his brother.

With the king creeping up in age, seeking retirement, the kingdom needs a secure heir now more than ever.

The next round of arena games is announced. King Anon himself has chosen to schedule the battles this season instead of the researchers. Last on the list are the two princes, being of elemental blood themselves, set to fight against each other in the grand finale. It becomes all too clear what the king is trying to do.

Perhaps this heir issue can be solved another way. This one, unexpected. If the brothers could sever the ties of their hate and unite against their father, they could forge a brighter future for all. But the price tag for doing so is steep. It requires much effort, and change on Constantine’s behalf. Could he have the strength he needs to pull himself out of his mental rut, and open up to those around him?

—

Here it is! My next project. It feels much simpler than my previous one, though I don’t know if that’s because I haven’t started writing it yet or what. Though to be fair, htkag was very… ambitious. Lots of subplots and whatnot, character driven. No specific structure either. In comparison, this work is plot driven and has only one or two subplots. I’ve made sure to browse some structures for this one and I found one to match! I already feel like this plot line is tighter knit than htkag’s plot was, which is a necessary improvement. I really feel like I’ve got something that works here, and I hope that won’t change.

Also I’m so so sorry the plot description isn’t the best. I know it’s long and kinda vague. I did my best to put it into words without spoiling much. I hope the idea of the plot still gets across. It’s more of an interpersonal story than it seems. I’m going to update it when I come up with something better, like an actual synopsis.

I’ve also made this huge ass moodboard for the vibes of the entire piece.

So. As you can see, I’m very prepared.

I also have these big moodboards made for all the main characters. I’m not gonna introduce them here, I think they all deserve their own posts.

Honestly for some reason I can’t picture this getting much traction, but that’s alright with me. I’m mainly just introducing it so people can have an idea of what I’m working on next, so I can talk about it some. But if you do want to be added to a taglist, just let me know somehow, kay? Love y’all, hope you’re having a lovely day/night.

—

(Just for clarification I don’t own any of the individual pictures, I just own the edits of them.)

[lady-grace-pens]

I officially have a wip intro post typed up for my next work. The plot description isn’t the best, but I mean. I might not come up with something better until I start writing it. Same thing happened with htkag soo that might just be a normal thing for me. Anyway, wondering if I should still post it sometime soon 🤔

[lady-grace-pens]

Totally forgot I was gonna post the link to the wip mood board I made for ETNB on my Pinterest. And the link to the playlist on Spotify. Both links are there now on the intro post pinned to my profile if anyone wants to see them now :) I also made the mood board for HTKAG visible on there too

[lady-grace-pens]

How to Kill a God : a wip introduction

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Genre:

Mythopoeia | Upper Young Adult/New Adult | Literary Fiction | Drama | Slice of Life |

Status:

Open to beta readers, dm if interested.

Point of View:

First person, present tense

Themes Explored:

Moving forward from the past, being lost in life, unconditional love being tested, embracing your own power, following your dreams, taking chances, and appreciating the beauty of nature.

Includes:

A childhood friends to lovers slow burn romance, a bit of found family, a heist or two, brotherly love, wrestling with religious beliefs, betrayals, one familial war, secrets and lies, and much more!

CW:

Death, smoking, drinking, strong langauge, severe depression, notes of classicism, and grief.

Synopsis:

The goddess Fate has a plan for us all. She is one of Universe’s daughters; her will is absolute. No single man is able to defy her. No matter what hell or high water she decides to force you through, the only thing you can do is sit back and let her have her way with you. Even if it’s in her divine, absolute will to make your life a living hell.

Hence is the case with Allister Haze. At what point through a series of heartaches will he discover within himself, the ability to defy her? To take his life into his own hands, and seek to build back up the foundations that she has destroyed... Surely it will be before it’s too late. Surely it will be before she strips young Allister away not only from his friends, but of the only family he has left, his very own twin brother. Surely... Won’t it?

How to Kill a God is a character driven novel in progress, estimated to be around 200k+ words when I’m finished writing it. Sooo if this sort of thing interests you, stick around for updates!

I don’t want to give away too much info about this babe because I’m aiming for it to be published one day. Plus I want a lot of the story events to be a surprise. Buuut I suppose I’m allowed to do a quick little character introduction as well. That’s below the cut if you’re interested!

Meet the Cast!

Allister Haze: the explorer

The story’s protagonist. At the ripe young age of 18, Allister is the very definition of a dreamer. He strives to achieve his dreams of becoming an explorer, but lacks a plan on how to get there. This doesn’t stop him from dreaming and encouraging others to do the same.

Allister is the adventurous type. He loves to try new things, go to new places, and wants to travel the world one day. He is also deathly curious. So much so that it can get him in trouble sometimes.

Preston Haze: the intellect

Allister’s twin brother, the more introverted one. He doesn’t have as many friends, let alone friends his own age. He’s very intelligent, but has a bad tendency to hide his feelings from everyone - including himself - until they explode. This means a lot of little white lies and secrets pile up over time.

Similarly, he can be pretty sarcastic. There’s nothing he loves more than teasing Allister. At the end of the day, however, Preston still cares a lot for those close to him.

William and Godfrey: the butlers

William and Godfrey are the two head butlers that work in the Haze estate. They’ve had their jobs for the twins’ entire lives. They’re the ones who helped raise the boys from birth. As such, they’re all very close. Their relationship resembles that of a close family, as opposed to the typical master and servant. Raising a couple of rich twin boys isn’t easy, but William and Godfrey try their hardest!

Madison ‘Maddie’ Schyler: the fashion designer

Maddie and Mak are childhood friends of Allister and Preston. Just like them, Maddie is also aged 18. She is a very caring soul, and also hard working. She’s very dedicated both to the people on her life, and to her workplace. Maddie is a woman of the fashion world, you see. She’s a designer and has her own online boutique. She is in love with Allister and tries hard to make him notice her in that light, but his obliviousness always wins instead.

Makenzie ‘Mak’ Schyler: the artist

Maddie’s little sister. She’s 16, so she still in high school. Mak is a fun-loving free-spirit, opting to let next to nothing get her down. She is Preston’s closest friend outside of his immediate family, and also his love interest.

Mikko and Fingal Moroni: the scalawags

Mikko and Fingal are a pair of brothers that Allister is friends with. Mikko is the younger one, 18. Fingal is a bit older, at age 20.

These two aren’t rich by any means. No, they’re a part of the common people, the ones who need to work a job in order to earn a living. Fingal does just this, and tries to get Mikko to get one also. Heaven knows they need the extra income. But nope! Mikko refuses to get a job, opting instead to gain money by... other means.

The Moroni brothers are the very definition of trouble in the minds of the common city folk. Mikko is a drunkard who loves to flirt, tease, bet, gamble, and enjoy the occasional cigarette. Fingal is his stoic yet responsible older brother who is dead inside and constantly smoking.

Percival ‘Perci’ James: the photographer

Allister’s other friend. Percival James is, by all means, a little ball of anxiety. He cannot handle stress at all, which doesn’t bode well considering how easily he gets worried about literally anything. He’s just 17, so he’s still in high school. It’s his last year though, so he’s almost out. As such, he needs to start thinking about his future.

His passion lies with photography, yet he feels like he can’t make a career out of it. Perci feels like he should go to college for a career that guarantees success, like that of a doctor. The main issue with that, however, is how college isn’t free and Perci’s family isn’t part of the rich elite like Maddie, Mak, and the Haze twins. Perci is a very bright young lad though, so no matter what he chooses to do, his mind and strong spirit will carry him through.

—

If you want to be notified about any future updates regarding this wip, let me know somehow and I can add you to the taglist below :)

@kazenokaori @vampire-with-a-pen @dahldahlbills @justyouraveragewriter @writingonesdreams @yuriperhaps @wordwizards

[lady-grace-pens]

WIP Update: HTKAG

LADIES, GENTLEMEN, AND DEAREST GENTLEFOLK

WE HAVE OFFICIALLY REACHED THE CLIMAX SCENE

THIS NOT A DRILL

TAGLIST: @dahldahlbills @vampire-with-a-pen @justyouraveragewriter @writingonesdreams @kazenokaori