#writing this and nodding along on zoom lol

[gardenerian]

can you write more about baby ian and/or his siblings when they were younger?? do you have any more hcs about him when he was really little??? i need to know

baby....... little baby. little boy 😭 okay. okay 😭😭😭😭 i am thinking about how frank tells ian that he's been a drama queen since the day he was born which is genuinely hilarious to me but it also has me THINKING....

when we meet ian he holds his cards pretty close to his chest, right? he still feels HUGE emotions and they burst out in pretty intense ways, but from day to day he just kinda moves through the world rolling his eyes at people sfkldj

now, we gotta take this with a grain of salt bc i feel like ian or any of the kids just saying "hi" would count as dramatic to frank lol but! let's think about baby drama queen ian.

thinking about ian dropping his popsicle in the grass by that above ground pool and losing his absolute mind over it when fiona tells him there aren't any more..... thinking about him seeing a dog in the neighborhood and pitching a fit in the middle of the sidewalk when he learns that no, he can't have this dog because it does in fact have someone walking him..... thinking about lip always beating him at battleship and ian flipping the little board over every time, stamping his little feet all the way up the stairs asklfd

[squoxle]

Hi ! Could you write something where like y/n is sucking or playing with heeseungs dick & she just got her fresh nails done and they’re pretty and EVERHTING & she poses with heeseungs dick and adds a bow …

(Sorry for taking so long to respond to your request)

French Tip ~ L. HS

pairing: sugar-daddy!bf!heeseung x babygirl!gf!reader| wc: 1.3k | plot: after getting your nails done, you're excited to show Heeseung your fresh, new set. | cw: 🔞MDNI!! blow job, boob job, hand job, basically touching his dick in every way possible and snapping a few pictures lol bc why tf not (there're also a few cute moments hehe)

Having your boyfriend pay for your nails was nothing out of the ordinary to you. He did this almost every week, or whenever else he thought they should be done.

Sometimes you would ask for his input, but today was not one of those days. You wanted to surprise him with a fresh, natural-looking set.

French Tips...

"When you finish getting your nails done, send me a pic. I wanna see what they look like," he said before kissing you on the cheek. You could still smell the scent of coffee from this morning in the air.

That alone was addicting enough, but when the scent of his Channel cologne was mixed in only one thing was on your mind. And that was getting back in bed with him. Or at least pleasing him while he tells you how pretty you look.

"Okay," you smiled softly as you looked into his sweet doe eyes. You pulled the gold chain of your black clutch bag over your shoulder as you headed out the door.

You would've loved for him to take you to your nail appointment today, but he had some business to take care of at home. To be specific, he had a very important meeting over Zoom with a few of his colleagues concerning a very important business deal, which he made crystal clear to you the day before.

Before heading to your appointment, you stopped to place an order for some desserts. Heeseung planned to have a business party next week and he left you in charge of the food.

"Why do you want me to do it? Can't you just hire someone else to take care of this," you asked, not because you had a problem with it, more so for the reason that you were honestly curious.

"Well, you have good taste," he smiled.

"Mhm, sure I do."

"Well, that and you taste good," he smirked, pulling you close to flick his tongue across your lips.

You took a sip from your water bottle as you walked into the beauty salon. "Good morning, Dear. Are you here for your 9 o'clock appointment?" Mrs. Yanez asked from behind the desk.

"Yes, ma'am," you smiled.

"Alright, I'm just gonna log you in," she said as she clacked away at her keyboard. "Do you know what you want to do today?"

"Yes, I'll need a full, fresh set along with a mani-pedi."

"Did you want a massage as well?"

"No, that's alright."

"You sure, it's 30 percent off today. Plus you've accumulated a total of 1500 pretty points with us."

"Hmm, well I'll definitely use those points another day," you smiled. "And as much as I would love a discounted massage, I kinda wanna get back home a little early today."

"Ooh, Mr. Lee must be home today," she teased.

"Yes, he is," you chuckled.

"Well, then I won't keep you waiting any longer," she smiled before pushing a small black button. She often reminded you of the tía-sobrina relationship you never had. You could talk to her about anything, and trust me...she wanted to hear it.

"Right this way, Miss," a masked employee nodded as you followed her to the back. You giggled as Mrs. Yanez playfully waved to you with a smirk on her face.

You sat down in a soft leather chair as you explained what look you were going for today. "I would like a natural-looking set. Almost like French tips, but with natural shades."

"So no white tip?"

"Well white like the color of my natural nails," you explained pointing to the whites of your nails.

"Okay, perfect. I can do that for you. Gloss or not gloss?"

"Gloss," you smiled, as the lady turned around to pick from the colors on her shelf. A nude color, an off-white color, and a pale yellow--which she mixed with the white to match the natural color of your nails.

Having a custom color mixed made your nails feel pretty unique. Plus, this was a style you never tried before, so you were excited to see how they'd come out.

After about 45 minutes you were ready to go. Two people ended up working on you which sped up the process.

"Tell Heeseung I said hello," Mrs. Yanez smiled as you walked out.

"I will," you chuckled as she waved to you.

You climbed into your car before heading over to a nearby boba shop to pick up some drinks. Matcha for you and brown sugar for him. You liked extra boba and he liked extra syrup. These were little details you could never forget.

*Click* you snapped a shot of you holding the brown sugar boba because it looked better with your nails, even though it was for Heeseung.

Within seconds he opened the message and hearted the pic you sent. "They look nice, babe," he texted. You were surprised he even said that much.

"Maybe his meeting hasn't started yet. Or maybe they canceled it," you thought to yourself. Either way, you couldn't wait to get back home.

"Heeseung?" you called out as you stepped out of your shoes. Your car keys, clutch bag, and phone balanced between your fingers as you carried both of the drinks over to the counter. You had drunk about a fourth of your by the time you made it home.

You placed yours on the counter as you walked into his home office.

You knocked softly as you opened the door. Heeseung didn’t say a single word, but the look on his face told you everything. “I’m a little busy right now, babe. You can come back later, okay.”

You paused in both shock and embarrassment for a moment before a cheeky smirk appeared on your face. You closed the door behind you before walking over to his desk.

He was trying his best not to look at you, but you could tell he wanted to.

You placed his drink on the desk next to him before crawling under the desk. As professional as Heeseung tried to be at times, he loved wearing his sweat pants and you liked them too.

They were comfortable and made pulling his dick out so much easier.

You fiddled around with his drawstring causing him to wiggle a bit from your touch before you managed to get his dick out. You felt him harden between your palms as you stroked him up and down. That's when an idea popped into your head.

You pulled your phone out and snapped a shot of his tip against your tongue. You placed your phone down beside you as you began to suck him off. You felt him lean forward slightly, trying his best to contain his excitement.

You kissed the head of his dick to give him a chance to readjust himself. You could hear the voices of his colleagues coming from his computer as you continued to suck him off. You pulled back to unbutton your blouse using your tits to take the place of your hands as you jerked him off.

*Click* you took another pic of his dick nestled in between your tits.

You traced your tongue up the length of his shaft before taking it back in your mouth. It wasn't long before you heard him getting ready to end the call.

You looked up at him from under the desk. "Couldn't wait until after my meeting," he asked with a smirk.

You shook your head no as you continued to bob your head on his cock.

"Did you at least enjoy yourself?"

"Hmm...almost. I still feel like I'm missing a little something."

"And what would that be?" he asked cheekily, though he was fully aware of what you wanted...especially after you opened your mouth to tap his tip on your tongue.

He grabbed your head, shoving it down as he pumped himself into your mouth. Just as he was getting ready to cum he pulled your head back to coat your tongue.

*Click* He took a photo of your sitting between his legs with his cum all over your tongue and a dazed look on your face.

He paused to tap away at his phone before sending a pic of you with a bow edited on your head looking completely cum drunk.

❀ Thank you all so much for reading! Make sure to check out other works on my masterlist!

❀ 𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝: @chlorinecake @mimikittysblog @nikisvanillaccola @wonbinisbabygurl @mrswolfhard3 @laylasbunbunny @sussyjake @furious-eagle @cherrriesss @abbyizzy @weyukinluv @addictedtohobi @thatonenoona @wavykook @givemeyourtmihyun @jaeljn @hoonmywk @valennshit @19-yunalyn @hoonbby @frostedblankets @hoonsyo @no-mannerism @perfectxserendipity @chubbibish @ihrtlix @bunniesforsoobin @thereadersparadise @thatbooknerdfr @aiden2001 @belongstoheeseung @jakeybabe @donut-crazs @rizzhee @nikimeows @woonieees @uarmyxtae @rebecca-johnson-28 @they2luv1naia @isa-2007 @silcry @riverscafe @pearlwhitesoul @nikohiroshi @thatbooknerdfr @wonniewonwon @sughoonieeee @babyy-bambii @adrika04 @sehunsharpasseyebrows @wtfyangjungwon @fr-3-akn-4-stymf @rikiloversworld @shawyle @sunoosrightbuttcheek @uarmyxtae @lovesickxmina @urfavberry @urauntiefaye @breadlover01 @taehyunsfavmo

[lee-laurent]

Under the Radar - Matthew Tkachuk

Summary: Matthew Tkachuk elopes with his secret lover, the biggest issue... she's Luke Hughes' twin sister.

Content: marriage, secret relationship, age gap (it's legal!!), angst, unsupportive family, mentions of sex, fighting, physical violence (not between couple!)

WC: 3.45k

notes: i listened to "Archie, Marry Me" by Alvvays on repeat while writing this and "Please Please Please" cause that's how freya feels about matt here lol i've been watching the stanley cup finals and my love for matt tkachuk has grown hehe enjoy!! :D obviously idk anyone in this story personally, so it's all for the drama !!

Freya giggled as Matthew placed kisses on her exposed shoulder. She was standing in front of the full body mirror in her boyfriend's room, flattening out the silky white dress that she'd chosen for the occasion. The white silk fell mid thigh and had small slit on the left side, a small bow adorned the corseted top.

"Fuck, you look stunning, love," Matt whispered in her ear, goosbumps forming on the back of her neck.

"I just need to do my hair, then we can head out," Freya smiled, giving Matthew a quick peck as she walked into his bathroom. He followed her, watching as she took the heated curling iron and spun a piece of her dirty blonde hair around it. After finishing some loose curls and setting them with hair spray, Freya did a once over in the mirror.

"What d'you think, Matty?"

"Hottest girl on this planet," he smirked, trailing kisses along her neck.

"Stop! We've gotta get to the courthouse."

"Right, right. But after..."

"Matt!"

"We've gotta consummate the marriage, Frey."

She giggled, hiding her face in his neck. He placed a kiss to her head, spinning her around so he could admire them in the mirror. She grabbed her phone, snapping a quick mirror pic.

"That one's getting framed," she nodded, zooming on her boyfriend's face.

"Are you sure you don't want me to shave? Just for the photos?" Matt offered.

"No! The scruff is soooo hot! Jess said we have to look hot for our photos!"

"Okay, okay. Can't believe Jess knows we're getting married, but our families don't."

"We'll tell them when it's time. Plus, Jess is good at keeping secrets."

That was true. Freya's best friend, Jessica, had been keeping the couple's relationship a secret for a year and a half now. The girls had met at University of Miami two years before and had been best friends ever since.

"You got your ring?" Matthew asked, placing the small velvet box in his suit jack.

"Yes, sir! I'm so excited!"

"Me too, baby. Can't wait for you to be Mrs. Tkachuk."

"Sounds so hot when you say it," she flirted, placing a hand on his lapel.

He winked, "Sit on the bed. I'll help you with your heels."

Freya complied, bouncing as she sat down. Matt grabbed the strappy, white heels from his closet. He guided her feet into them, gently doing up the buckles. She ran a hand through his hair, fixing it the way she liked it.

"Shall we, Future Mrs. Tkachuk?"

"We shall," she giggled, interlocking their arms as they walked to the parking garage.

"And Miss Hughes, do you take Matthew Tkachuk to be your lawfully wedded husband?" the man behind the counter asked.

"I do," she beamed, holding Matt's hands tightly in her own.

"Do you, Mr. Tkachuk, take Freya Hughes to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do."

"You may now kiss the bride."

The couple met in a sweet kiss, not wanting it to be too long in the public courthouse.

"If you'll both just sign here and here," the man smiled, sliding the paper and pen towards the couple. "Pefect! You two are now legally married. Congratulations!"

Freya's smile was so wide, it hurt her cheeks. She was practically jumping as they exited the building. Matthew was smiling just as brightly, tightly gripping onto his wife's waist.

"Jess!" Freya exclaimed, throwing her arms around her best friend.

"There's Mrs. Tkachuk! Always knew you two would end up together, Frey. I've been telling you since we met," Jess whispered. Freya blushed, pushing her best friend.

"Let's go take some photos!" Matthew guided the girls into his car, driving them down to a small, very private park. They snapped some cute photos together, before Jess handed Freya a bottle of champagne. She shook it, spraying the alcohol all over herself and her husband. Jess got some amazing candids of the couple, especially as they met in a passionate kiss that she snapped a few shots of.

"Enjoy your wedding night!" Jess shouted, waving goodbye.

Freya couldn't stop giggling as they entered Matt's bedroom, "We're married! I'm married to the love of my life!"

"Did you chug a bunch of that champagne when I wasn't looking? Or are you just drunk on love?" Matt teased.

"Matt! We're married!"

"I know, love! Freya Tkachuk. God, that sounds so hot," his voice was gruff as he pulled her on top of him on the bed.

"I love you so much," she pressed kisses all over his face.

"I love you too, Frey. Now... shall we make this marriage official," he smirked, placing his hands on her hips.

"Any cute boys at school?" Ellen asked.

"What? No, Mom. I told you I'm focusing on my degree," Freya giggled, helping her mom to make dinner. They were at the cottage that Quinn and Jack had purchased. The Hughes family had invited the Tkachuks for a weekend and Freya was desperately trying to hide her excitement, having not seen her husband in just over a month.

"I know, I know. Just thought maybe some would've caught your eye. Who knows... maybe when Luke's friends come you'll find one of them cute."

"Mom!"

"Sorry, sorry. But, Luke told me that Dylan's little brother is single."

"MOM!"

Ellen laughed, continuing to cut up the fruit in front of her.

"We're home!" Quinn shouted, placing his keys in the bowl in the front hall. Ellen quickly wiped her hands off, running to meet their guests.

"Chantal! Keith! How've you been?"

The two families immediately started chatting away, Freya biting her lip when she saw Matt wink at her. She was pulled into a conversation with Chantal about school and if Matt had helped her out at all while living in Flordia.

"Oh, yeah. He always asks if I need anything. I even went to a few games first semester," she smiled, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Look at that ring! So cute! Where'd you get it?" Taryn squealed.

"My best friend Jess bought it for me!" Freya lied. That was the excuse that the couple had come up with. Matt had 'bought his own ring' and 'Jess' had bought Freya's.

"It's beautiful! Could be a wedding ring!"

"Yeah. She's the best."

"You live with Jess?" Chantal asked.

"Yeah, yeah. We've lived together this past year."

"Before we get too far into conversation, let's show everyone their rooms," Ellen smiled, unknowingly saving Freya from crafting more lies.

After a dinner full of catching up, Matt and Freya sat around the fire with the rest of the kids. The adults had called it a night an hour before, but the young adults were still buzzing with excitement. Freya was clasping a seltzer between her hands, sitting between her twin and Taryn.

"No boyfriend?" Taryn asked, taking a sip of her White Claw.

"Hm? I'm too focused on school."

"Lukey's been trying to set her up with Tyler Duke, but she's not interested," Quinn snorted from beside Brady.

"He's just... not my type."

"Not your type? Tyler is like the definition of your type, Frey! Curly haired, hockey player? You'd marry him on the spot if you hadn't convinced yourself you're focused on your studies," Luke laughed.

Freya's eyes looked around the fire, meeting with Matt's, who had his eyebrow quirked.

"Tell us more about this Tyler kid," he mused, taking a long drink from his beer.

"He's a sophmore at Umich. Is madly in love with Freya and has been since I started doing hockey with Dylan. They even kissed when they were like 14."

"Luke! Stop!" Freya hid her face in her hands. Matthew looked unimpressed, chugging the rest of his beer, before cracking open another one.

"Maybe Freya doesn't like younger guys," Jack joked, making Matthew cover his smirk with his new drink.

"Can we stop talking about my love life? Please!"

"It's okay, Frey. Matt's is just as sad," Brady joked, patting his older brother on the back.

"What can I say? Baby brother got married before me, and all my hopes and dreams went down the drain," Matt retorted, staring directly at Freya. She swallowed harshly, now reaching for another drink. She couldn't do this sober.

After the awkward conversation about her love life, or lack there of, Freya was silent. She didn't want to accidentally say something to out the face that she was married at 20, especially with all the alcohol running through her system. It wasn't until the next day that things really went down hill.

Everyone was paying Quinn to get more alcohol for that night. Matt opened his wallet when a photo fell out, not noticing he fished out a ten dollar bill and handed it to the eldest Hughes. Luke bent down, grabbing the photo that had fallen on the floor. His brow furrowed as he studied the image. His sister in a Panthers jersey, her arms wrapped around a sweaty looking Matt.

"What's wrong, Rusty?" Jack laughed, "What's that?"

Luke handed the photo to his brother, who also took a moment to study it.

"Is that Freya?"

"What're we looking at?" Freya smiled, pushing her way between her brothers. Her face fell, "Where'd you get that?"

"Matt dropped it," Luke's eyes narrowed at his sister.

"Oh. Hm, that's... huh," she trailed off.

"Quinn! Come look at this!" Jack waved over his brother, who was chatting with Brady. Matt had disappeared off to the kitchen to talk to Jim.

"Why? Oh... Frey?" Quinn shot her a questioning look after being handed the photo.

"Why's everyone so upset? We're friends," she tried to smile.

"Then why's it in his wallet?" Luke sneered.

"Because... we're really good friends?" she shrugged, sounding unsure of herself.

Quinn huffed, pushing the photo into Jack's chest. He stormed off to the kitchen, followed by the rest of the kids. He harshly pushed Matt, making the taller boy stumble.

"Wow. What the hell, Quinn?" Matt turned around.

"You're fucking my little sister?! She's barely legal, Matthew! And you're fucking 26!"

"Quinn," Ellen warned, but her son didn't listen. He pushed Matt again, this time getting a shove in return.

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about, but you need to calm the fuck down," Matt attempted to keep his composure, knowing he could easily overpower the Hughes' boy.

"Don't even pretend to be innocent! You've been sleeping with Freya!"

"Freya? What's Quinn talking about, dear?" Ellen asked, moving away from the boys.

"I- I don't know, Mom."

"Bullshit! Look at this, Mom!" Jack handed the photo over. Ellen looked it over, a confused expression covering her face. She met Freya's pleading eyes, biting her bottom lip.

The fight between Quinn and Matt was escalating. After a particularly harsh push from Quinn, Matthew tackled him to the floor. The kitchen broke out into hysterics. Everyone was shouting, telling the boys to stop. Freya had started to cry, Taryn holding onto her tightly. Even if Taryn was a little upset she didn't know about her childhood friend's relationship with her brother, she was still going to support her.

"Enough!" Jim's voice broke through the noise, he and Keith wrangled Mattew off Quinn. "Everyone in the living room, now!"

Freya stood next to Taryn, her shoulders shaking with sobs. Quinn and Luke were fuming. Jack appeared to be a bit upset, but he wasn't as protective over his little sister.

"Someone, please, explain what the hell is going on here!" Jim boomed.

"Matt's been taking advantage of Freya!" Quinn exclaimed.

"Matthew," Chantal looked towards her oldest.

"He- he's not taking advantage of me," Freya wiped her nose on the sleeve of her hoodie.

"Let's hear what Matthew and Freya have to say before we jump to conclusions," Ellen mediated.

"I-" Freya started.

"We're married," Matthew cut her off. Silence filled the room.

"You're what?!" Jim asked, anger covering his face.

"We- we got married at the end of the semester," Freya explained, more tears leaving her eyes. Taryn rubbed her back comfortingly.

"Why?! Are you pregnant?!" Chantal gasped.

"No, Mom. She's not pregnant. We- we love each other."

"She's 20!" Luke yelled.

"This... this does seem a bit sudden, Frey," Jack mumbled.

"No! Matthew and I are in love!" Freya sobbed, standing up and moving towards him. Jim stopped her before she could, handing her over to her mother.

"I think it's best you leave, Matthew," Jim sighed, rubbing his forehead.

"You're kicking my son out for being in love?!" Chantal screeched, "No way!"

"She's practically still a teenager!" Quinn retorted.

"She's an adult! And they made an adult decision. Although, I would've appreciated an invite."

"It was private, Mom. Just us at the courthouse."

"You got fucking eloped to him?!" Quinn growled at his sister. She sobbed harder, hiding her face in her mom's shoulder.

"I think it's best if we all leave," Keith sighed, patting Jim on the back.

"No! Matty," Freya cried, but Ellen pulled her back.

"Shh, love. It's okay," she cooed, running a hand through Freya's hair.

Matthew nodded solemnly. And just like that the Tkachuks were gone.

"Freya, why did you think it was a good idea to get eloped?" Jim asked, sitting across from his daughter at the table.

"I- I love him. We just... it felt right."

"We... we just would've liked to know, Frey. That's a big decision to make."

"I know, Mom. I'm sorry. We were just happy living in our own little world. We were going to tell everyone later."

"We're happy that you're happy, Freya. You just need to get your brothers to feel the same way. I'm sorry for kicking Matthew out, I just didn't want the boys to fight anymore. And it is Quinn's house," Jim sighed.

"Thanks, Dad. It's okay. I'm sure Matt understands. I love you guys."

"We love you too, Freya," Ellen smiled, pulling her daughter in for a hug.

Freya knocked on Quinn's door, getting an exasperated "WHAT?!" in response.

"It's Frey. Can we talk?"

"I'm not sure I want to," Quinn replied.

"Come on, Quinn. Hear me out."

"Fine. Come in."

Freya sat on the edge of her brother's bed, him sitting next to her. The air in the room felt thick, and it made her anxiety even worse.

"I'm- Freya, I just want to understand what your thought process was when you decided to get married to a guy you've been with for a year."

"I'm in love. Don't people say love makes you do dumb things?"

"He's 26."

"I know. But I'm an adult too. It isn't illegal. And it's not like I married some random guy. You know Matt. You've known Matt forever."

"Doesn't mean I'm happy about it. Are you sure this wasn't a shotgun wedding?"

"I'm not pregnant! We're always safe when we-"

"I don't want to hear about your sex life. Especially your sex life with Matthew Tkachuk," Quinn groaned. "But I guess I'm relieved you aren't pregnant."

"Yeah, me too," she giggled.

"Look, I'll get over this, Frey. I just need time. I'm your big brother and I'll always love you, but... I don't know how to feel about this."

"But it has nothing to do with you, Quinn. It's my life. I decided to get married."

"Nothing to do with me? Freya, you're my little sister. And you kept this secret from the whole family. I'm pretty sure I'm allowed to be pissed! Especially when you married my best friend's older brother!"

"I- I'm sorry, Quinn. I'll give you the time. But please remember that I... I am an adult."

"I know, Freya. I know. I- I love you."

"Love you too, Quinn."

"Cracking Luke isn't going to be this easy. He's really upset," Quinn sighed.

Freya entered Luke's room, "Leave."

"Luke."

"No. Leave. I don't want to see you."

"Luke-"

"Leave, Freya! I don't want to talk to you! You betrayed my trust."

"I'm not leaving, Luke."

He sat up in his bed and if looks could kill, Freya would be dead.

"Fine. You want to hear what I have to say? I'm pissed. I am so fucking mad at you. You're my twin! You... you've always told me everything! And I tell you everything! Then I have to find out through a photo that you're not even just dating Matthew Tkachuk... you're married to the fucking guy! Would've been nice to know! Like I don't know... when you started TALKING TO HIM!"

"Luke-"

"No, Freya. I don't want to hear your side of things. Leave. NOW!"

Freya returned to her room with tears in her eyes, clicking on Matt's contact and holding her phone up to her ear.

"Hey, baby. Everything okay?"

"Mom and Dad are happy for us. Quinn said he'll get over it. I don't think Jack even cares. But Luke... Luke is really mad at me. I don't think he's been this mad since I broke his Sidney Crosby mini stick when we were kids."

"I- I can come get you, love. Go for a little drive."

"I want to go home, Matty."

"Home? Like Florida?"

"Yes," she sobbed.

"Okay... okay, baby. We can do that. I-"

"Come get me."

"Okay, yeah. I'm coming. I love you, Freya."

"I love you too, Matt."

A week later, Freya felt like she could finally breathe. Matt wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her back flush against his chest. He rocked them back and forth, whispering sweet nothings into her ear.

"I love you."

"I love you too. You wanna get ready for bed? It's been a long couple of days."

She shook her head, spinning to wrap her arms around his neck.

"What do you want, Frey? Anything you want."

"You," she whispered, meeting their lips in a sweet kiss.

The next morning, Freya woke up to her phone ringing repeatedly.

"Hello?" she answered sleepily. Matthew groaned, rolling over and pulling her body closer to his.

"Hey, Frey! Luke's kind of miserable. D'you think you could talk to him?" Jack's voice broke through the speaker.

"Um... he said he doesn't want to talk to me."

"Who is it?" Matt mumbled.

"He's just being dumb! Frey, you're his best friend in the whole world. He's all mopey without you."

"Then he can apologize for yelling at me and then I'll think about it."

"Frey-"

"Now if you don't mind, I'm trying to enjoy my alone time with my husband."

"Ew-"

Freya hung up, placing her phone back on the nightstand. Matt sighed, throwing her leg over his hip. He buried his head in her neck, his breathing falling into a steady pattern as he fell back asleep. Freya couldn't sleep though, she just wanted Luke to accept that she was happy, why was it so hard for him?

Luke had typed the message to his sister out at least 15 times, but he couldn't find the words to describe how he was feeling. Quinn and Jack, with the help of their parents, had talked some sense into him. He understood that he had the right to be upset with Freya, but he had taken it too far. Now, he just needed his apology to seem sincere and heartfelt.

"Just tell her exactly how you feel," Jack shrugged.

"Ew, you're making it sound like I'm confessing my feelings to a girl."

Jack rolled his eyes, "Shut up, Luke. Just text our fucking sister."

Hey, Freya. I know I shouldv'e done this sooner, but the way I reacted to the news of you and Matt was immature and unfair to you. You were already feeling so much stress and I just added to that. I have the right to be a little upset, but you're right... you don't have to tell me everything. I love you, Frey. Text me when you see this

When Freya saw that text, she couldn't wipe the smile from her face. Rolling over and pressing kisses all over Matthew's exposed skin.

"Hm," he groaned, "What's got you in such a good mood?"

"Luke apologized! Everyone is happy for us!"

"That's good. Now sleep. You look exhausted, babe."

"I can't sleep now! Everything is the way I always wanted it to be!"

"Mmm, yeah. That's awesome, Frey."

"Matty! This is the best!"

He laughed, watching sleepily as she straddled his waist. He placed his hands on her hips, running his thumbs over the smooth skin.

"I'm happy that you're happy, baby."

"I'm so happy! Almost as happy as when we got married," she smirked.

"Nothing can top that."

And with that Freya leaned forward and connected their lips. Morning breath or not this was the man she loved, and now she could share him with the world.

[astrxsee]

FALSE GOD chap. 2

(chap 1) (chap 2) (chap 3)

percy jackson x child of demeter!oc

𝑰𝑵 𝑾𝑯𝑰𝑪𝑯 Rose St. Claire sets off on a quest to save the goddess in chains.

𝑶𝑹

𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑪𝒀 𝑱𝑨𝑪𝑲𝑺𝑶𝑵 learns to see what is right in front of him.

!CONTENT WARNING! gore, romance, swearing, blood, heavy themes

a/n: omg! hi i love posting on tumblr so much?? like i finally wanna write again LOL anyways I can also take requests! only if you want anyways pls i hope you like the next chapter i PROMISE there will be romance but it’s a slow burn dw

also can someone please show me how to link the first chapter i cannot for the life of me pls and thanks

sorry for the delay yall fr i just have to be in the right headspace to write im so sorry anyways i hope you like it please feel free to give any feedback

also if you like it i would be happy to put anyone on a tag list as well <3

The clicking of heels against the polished floor grabs my attention, the game I was holding in my hand lays idly to the side. Bianca shoots me a nervous look from her seat next to me before peering up at the stern lady. The lady's grey hair was slicked back into a bun, her nose crooked, almost like a scythe. She did not look very nice.

"Bianca Di Angelo." She states, matter of factly. "I am here to take you, your brother," The woman shoots a pointed look at Nico, "And your... friend."

The look the mysterious woman gave was poisonous, her eyes daggers as she looked at me. Her nose sneered as she took in the surroundings of the casino. It was loud, I could tell she didn't like it.

"My name is Rose." I snapped, quickly rising to my feet. I cross my arms as her eyes narrow as she looks at me. I glare back at her, not backing down from her imposing stare.

She sighs and rolls her eyes muttering something under her breath, something along the lines of 'stupid demigods'. I feel Bianca stand next to me, putting a calming hand on my shoulder. She quickly steps in front of me, breaking my cold stare at the unpleasant woman.

"Excuse me, but are you here to take us to school?" Bianca asks, her head tilted in a curious way. The old woman nodded, a careless look on her face.

"Yes, now come, we haven't got any time to lose. Don't ask any questions." The woman says before turning on her heel to the exit of the casino. I cast a look over my shoulder to Nico, his face twisted in a worried look. His hands fiddled with a silver army soldier toy, as he glanced around at everyone except the lawyer.

"Are you sure we can't just stay?" A small voice speaks out from behind Bianca. The stern woman whips around to look at Nico, who looks like he was about to cry. The lawyer scoffs.

"Stupid boy. You three are too important to be kept here." She bluntly states. Kept here? Too important? Her words make my mind spiral. I cast a worried glance over to Bianca who also has a troubled look on her face.

I couldn't help the nervous feeling in my chest. My Dad had brought me here about two months ago. Now that I think of it, I couldn't really remember what he looked like, let alone why he left me here. Were we being kept here? I shake my head, trying to rid my mind of these troubling thoughts.

My brows furrow as I try to remember the events leading up to entering the casino. It feels like the memories are just out of reach, like a blank space fills the area where they used to be. All I could remember was the year; 1976. I didn't want to go back out there, I didn't want to face what was waiting for me on the outside. Surely, the police would still be looking for me. Most of all, I didn't want that... thing to get me.

I roughly bump into Bianca, who stopped in her tracks. Daylight poured through the open door of the casino, I could hear many voices and sounds coming from outside.

"Bianca, what the hell." I ask, my mind snapping back to reality. I glance up and all words are lost as I become rooted to my spot. The cars zoomed by in the road, hundreds of billboards lined the bustling streets. There were bright screens with neon words that I couldn't even understand. Where was I? All I know that this was not 1976.

"Hurry up, children. We haven't got time to loose." The lawyer snaps. I look over to her, my mouth wide open. Bianca and Nico still had their eyes glued to the unfamiliar scene, their faces contorted into looks of panic.

A feeling of anger rose up inside of me as I took steps closer to the woman. She didn't even flinch as I leaned as close as I could to her.

"Where the fuck are we?" I yell, my confusion getting the better of my rationality. My arms gesture to the enigmatic scene in front of me. What year is it? What happened?" My mind is running too fast that I can't comprehend one thought. Where were we? What happened while I was in the casino? Why did it look like we were in the future?

An annoyingly amused smile makes it way onto the lawyers face. She shakes her head and lets out a condescending laugh.

"Stupid girl." She began, her eyes bored, "I told you to not ask any questions." My eyes open incredulously at her dismissive words. My entire world had been flipped on its head and she tells me not to ask questions! The anger boils up in my chest as I stand there with millions of questions. I notice pink flowers start to pop up in the cracks of the sidewalk, I didn't care at this point. I couldn't control it.

"What year is it?" A soft voice breaks me from my confused spiral. Bianca, now looking over to the woman, asks, her face full of confusion. She then looks at me, her eyes filled with tears.

"2007." She bluntly states, rolling her eyes as if it was a stupid question. My hand flies to my mouth in shock as I hear the woman's words. 2007! I have been in that damn casino for thirty one years? I reel back, the realization finally hitting me. I shake my head, a feeling of sickness washes over me. This can't be happening.

The woman guides us towards a large black car. I had never seen a car so big and with so many seats! She motions to the driver to leave after we all file into the car. Nico looks completely lost, his hands still on his silver army toy.

"Now, you may be confused." The woman, Camille according to the driver, starts. I scoff at her words, my arms crossed as I look out the window. A growing feeling of sadness wells up in my stomach, a twisting sort of feeling. "I can assure you that you will be safe at your new school. We will be there shortly."

How much did the world change? Why does time pass differently in that casino? Why did my Dad leave me there? Thousands of questions circled around in my head, too many unknowns for me to handle.

I feel my breaths begin to quicken, my hands shaking. I fiddle with the pins and patches on my worn out bomber jacket, quickly grounding myself. I think of my hands in cold grass and a warm breeze blowing over my face. I breathe out a sigh, accepting of the absolutely crazy situation.

I place my hand over Bianca's, she breaks her stare from out the window to look over at me. I give her a reassuring smile and her hand a small squeeze. She gives me a small smile, telling me that she's okay.

"Okay, children, grab your things. We're here." Camille orders. She quickly climbs out of the car and starts making her way to the man standing outside of the ominous front doors of the school. I grab my green duffel bag and follow Bianca out of the car, Nico follows me slowly. I didn't even want to think about how scared he must be. We all follow Camille slowly, our necks craned up to take in the vastness of the school.

Standing on the pathway, there stands a man. He towers over my friends and I as we stand behind our lawyer. He gives us all a large, slightly creepy smile. His two different colored eyes almost seemed to glow as he looked at us.

"Welcome to Westover Hall. Your new home."

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

taglist: @cxcilla

[nehswritesstuffs]

fly little seagull, that rock can be home - Part 2

With the rate at which I’m finishing these chapters, I highly doubt I’m going to get the next one done before *checks notes* mid-April at the earliest, so I’m sorry in advance. Good news I guess is that I recently also passed 41k overall and I am regretting my decisions lol

Chapter 1 [FFN/AO3]

With a backwater island located, a father and daughter adjust to their new life. [10,387 words; AU where Law tries to lead the quiet life Cora-san always wanted for him]

Business was slow.

It was not that there was a lack of need for a medical professional in Hinba or on Diura as a whole. As a matter of fact, it was clear that there was an intense need for one. It was simply that—aside from the handful of new patients he did see who were mostly around his age—the residents weren’t entirely trusting of the man who simply wandered in from parts unknown and it was becoming a problem.

“They’ll come around,” Svana said as she measured Law’s fingers. She was bored and decided that he needed gloves, so therefore was going to knit some that fit his curiously long hands. He had tried to turn her down, but before he could even get a word out Nauja had been gifted mittens of her own for when the snows began to fly, the girl now wearing them happily around the house as the adults stuck to the front sitting room.

“I’m more used like a novel pharmacy than anything,” he groused. “How do you get them to listen to you?”

“I delivered over half the island’s population and haven’t lost a mother yet,” she shrugged. “They’re a prickly bunch—we tend to be so here in the South.”

“I knew this place felt like home,” he scoffed. She finished writing measurements and took some yarn and needles from her basket. “I’ve worked with guys from the South Blue before—I was well aware of what I was getting into.”

“Of course,” she agreed idly. Law wasn’t entirely certain he enjoyed the fact the island’s elderly midwife had attached herself to the clinic so readily. Boredom, perhaps? Wanting to make certain that the prior doctor’s spirit was not being trampled? If he didn’t know better, he would have guessed that there had been something between Svana and the old doctor, though that would have put such an age gap between them that he didn’t want to think of the logistics…

Just then, one of the small children who tended to run around nearby came barreling in through the front door, making Law jump in surprise; how in the hell were kids fucking with his Observational Haki? The child, however, looked out of breath, as though he had run the entire way from the school to there.

“Now what is this about?” Svana asked, barely even reacting to the boy’s sudden presence.

“There’s ships in the harbor!” the boy squeaked. “Traders!”

“Which ones?” she asked. The boy pondered for a moment as he took off his backpack.

“Books and stuff, but also house things!” He took a small box from his bag and shoved it in Law’s hands. “Miss Lanna at the shop told me to give this to you!”

“I never ordered anything… what is it…?”

“Mark-over,” the boy scoffed, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Some people use it when the traders are in town because of the sailors’ marks they got! She said you probably don’t have some for your hands. I guess it’s the stuff you have to mix…? But she said you could get some that matches your hands better if you talk to her.”

“Then I shall have to thank Miss Lanna next time I see her,” he nodded. The boy grinned, clearly proud of himself. “Now run along; I should put some of this on if I’m going to see what the traders brought.”

“Yes, sir!” The boy then zoomed out of the house as quickly as he entered it, leaving the two adults to exchange tired looks.

“Do you need me to show you?” Svana asked, gesturing to the makeup box.

“I’m a man of many talents,” he deadpanned. He stood and brought the box with him to the large infirmary, where he was able to mix the tint into the makeup with the help of the room’s strong lights until it was so close to his skin tone that he almost couldn’t tell the difference. Law thought of Cora-san as he began to brush the stuff over his hands and forearms, remembering the man’s routine that he had though of as silly at the time.

“Remember Law, you don’t need to pile it on too thick. Just enough to conceal will do.”

Fuck… it had seemed like so long ago… was it really that long? Cora-san had taught him a lot when they were running together, hadn’t he? Sometimes there was nothing to do but watch him. He would shave, put on makeup, fix his hair… usually right before they tried another hospital that he eventually would burn down. He didn’t think the medical networks they visited had fully recovered until just a year or so before he took the Polar Tang into the Grand Line…

A few spritzes of sealant and the job was complete. Law stared at his hands and arms, marveling at how different they looked without the ink being visible. He stared in the mirror as he fastened his shirt up to the second-to-topmost button, fingers trembling as he did so. Each done button made the man staring back at him more a ghost than anything, his father finally before him when he was done. Neither of his parents had tattoos that he had known of, and it reminded him partly of why he had gotten them to begin with—to stave off his brain going back to those days.

It was inevitable now; he planned on growing older than his father ever had the chance to be, and the man was certain to stare back at him from time to time for his troubles. How old would his parents be if they lived this long…? How much older than Cora-san had they been…? What would they think of him off in the middle of nowhere, playing pretend—

“Vaor! Vaor! Vaor!” His morbid thoughts took a back seat as he heard Nauja come looking for him, with her nearly throwing the door open with how excited she was. “Svana-ya said traders are here!” She stopped and stared at his hands and forearms, her head tilting to the side. “Where’d your tattoos go?”

“I covered them—can’t trust traders. Their reach is too long.”

“Since when do you know makeup?”

“You’ve seen photos of Cora-jiisan; the man made sure I can apply eyeliner in the dark.”

“Can you teach me how to do that?”

“Maybe when you’re a little older and we know your hand’s steady,” he offered. “Now come on; let’s go see what got brought into port.”

Nauja made her way to the front door while Law got his wallet from his office and left the clinic, Svana having already gone back to her own house. The pair went down to the docks and watched some of the merchants unload their ship with some of the other villagers. Law glanced over at one of the men standing there—a teacher from the school, if he recalled correctly, who looked to be about his age.

“How do we see what they got?” he asked.

“We have a couple empty spots where they set up shop—in the middle of summer, there’s often stalls,” the other man replied. He gestured down the main road, where someone was opening the shutters of what was likely a storefront. “You’re the new doctor, I take it?”

“Yeah. Tr—er…” He pretended to cough. “Sorry. Doctor Corasson Law. My daughter Nauja is the one that only shows up three times a week for morning sessions and twice for afternoons.”

“You’re good to make her go at all—her social skills have been improving the most from what I can tell. That you’d have to ask her main teacher; I just take her if there’s a coverage issue. I’m Seasbur Daisuke; Nauja’ll be in my class full-time in a couple years.”

“Thank you for looking after her.” He bowed his head slightly, Daisuke mirroring his movement. “She can be a little much.”

“Ah, she’s just a kid.”

“Yeah, but she’s my kid, so I know how much of a handful she can be.” He watched as the sailors continued to load boxes onto the cart. “What do they have, anyhow?”

“Stuff we can’t make here, mostly,” Daisuke explained. “Primarily manufactured goods, but there are some specialty imports and some different foods.” He paused for a moment, clearly mulling something over, before continuing. “Say, since I got you here and there’s still a while before they’re ready for business, my coworkers and I were wondering if we could talk to you about something.”

“Did Nauja—?”

“No, she’s fine. It has nothing to do with her, but figure might as well talk now while the kids are all distracted.” He motioned towards where the schoolhouse sat. Children were trickling out the front door, most of them bouncing and excited for what the traders possibly had for them as they headed towards the wharf.

Well, there was no time like the present, he guessed.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Law knuckled his left ear and stared at the small group in front of him. “You want me to teach what…?”

“Health class,” Jacks—the headmaster—repeated awkwardly. Both secretaries and all three teachers were there as well, each of them with a hopeful expression.

“You do realize that I don’t even know if the people on this island trust me yet to be their primary care physician, let alone teach their children anything related to the Human body.”

“Oh wait, that’s right, you also lived on the Grand Line—do you know anything about Fishfolk and Minks? To be thorough?”

Law pinched the bridge of his nose and pursed his lips for a moment, gathering himself. “I know my daughter just started and is on the young end, but what all do you teach here?”

“A bit of everything,” Rikki—one of the teachers—offered. “Reading, writing, math, geography, what we can of social studies, science, and history…”

“…and we add in things that would be useful for living on this island specifically,” another teacher—Dia—added. “This means often going outside the classroom for introductions to agriculture, animal husbandry, sailing, fishing, how to barter with merchants, placement with potential apprenticeships or further education off the island…”

“Wait: you can teach them about how sheep fuck but not about Humans?”

“It’d be nice if we didn’t have to teach them about Humans fucking,” Daisuke admitted. “I mean, you can also go over with them stuff about good hygiene and what to do when you’re sick and all that, but you’re an actual doctor… I think things might hit different coming from you.”

Whatever headache was going to result from this conversation was going to be troublesome.

“So… you want me to write a Health curriculum for ages six to sixteen purely because I am a doctor? Despite the fact I’m still a stranger? Don’t you ever have Svana-ya come in and talk to them or something…?”

“She does, but… my wife said that you trained for a while in Drum Kingdom before its downfall and then Water 7 after that—you’re much more qualified to talk about nitty-gritty medical matters.” Law stared at Jacks, unsure what in that to broach first. “My wife, Dervla, she’s the village leader. You know… the one that told you to set up shop in the old clinic.”

“Between talking to her and Svana, we’ve gotten an idea of the kind of person you are,” Daisuke added. Law exhaled heavily and was thankful that it was at least this and not, say, the entire village ganging up on him at once; he was right to suspect Svana as a possible font of information about him, though Dervla was a surprise. “We’re willing to give you a go, if you’re interested.”

“Might stave off some awkward conversations later,” Dia shrugged. “I’ve got the teenagers and the amount of things I’ve heard of getting stuck in places…”

“Alright, alright… fuck…” Law sighed. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly; this was a rare sort of opportunity to get in the good graces of the island’s inhabitants, and the sooner he could win their trust, the sooner he could blend into the background. “This would solve more problems than you’re telling me, I take it?”

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” Jacks admitted. “Sometimes we draw straws and it’s still not enough.”

Law regretted his words before he even said them. “Then I guess I can put together something…”

The collective sigh amongst the staff was telling.

“Seas, thank you,” Jacks breathed. He shook Law’s hand with an unexpected force that wriggled the younger man’s arm and through into his body. “How long do you need to prepare the course?”

“I… uh…”

“Does three weeks sound good?”

“It…”

“Excellent—we’ll set up something for you to show us what you’ve come up with in the meantime!” Jacks seemed to be absolutely set on not giving Law a choice in the matter. “Alright, then we’ll see you towards the end of the month.”

What the actual fuck had he just gotten himself into?

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“Vaor, can I ask a question about before here?”

It was a few days later and Law glanced up from the coursework he was compiling to see Nauja was standing awkwardly in the doorway to his office in the clinic. He reached out with his Observation Haki—cutting down on his Devil Fruit was going to be a priority—and felt no one, prompting him to put the publication down. “What is it, famke? Is it about the crew?”

“Umm…” She looked down at her hands. “I just had a thought: why do you have things from Flevance? I thought they were dangerous.”

Oh.

“They were, but I was able to fix that,” he replied. Law beckoned his daughter over and she entered the office, climbing up into his lap. She was getting big for that, he realized, and wondered when it would need to stop entirely. “One of the first things we did when we got the Polar Tang was go to Flevance and look around at all the damage. We took some things I didn’t mind ruining and experimented to see if we could divorce the Amber Lead from things that had been treated with it. After that, I was able to take things from my home and made them safe for people to touch and carry so that I’d always have a bit of the good memories with me.”

“So… that’s why you have Oma and Opa’s rings?”

“Yeah.” He felt the weight of the twin loops sitting against his chest on their chain a little more prominently, glad for their presence. “It’s how I got a lot of things, actually.” Pausing, he wondered if he should continue, then thought he might as well. “Would you like to see?”

“Oooh! Yes please!” Nauja’s face brightened at the prospect, so Law opened a Room—damn it, he had to stop that—and replaced the medical journal with a boot-box he had brought with him from the Polar Tang, one with a cobbler’s stamp from a shop on the White City’s high street. It was one of the few things from the ship he’d taken that could not be shoved in a pack, along with a box of miscellaneous books and things, as well as the small chest from Nauja’s original home in Water 7. “Oh! This box!”

“Do you remember this?” She nodded as he lifted the lid and took out the envelopes of photographs, exposing the rest of the contents scattered across the bottom. “We couldn’t bring anything too hefty with us, being in a submarine and all, but we were able to reclaim some things like jewelry and other small items.”

“Oooh, like these!” Nauja marveled, taking a pair of wire-frame eyeglasses out. She held them up to her face and then wobbled—the lens’ strength was a surprise. “Opa had bad eyes.”

“Heh, yeah, and so far I’ve got Oma’s sight, so we’re keeping our fingers crossed,” Law explained. “This was the bell Tante Lami and I used when we were sick, and these are my parents’ name tags for their doctor’s coats at the hospital—it was easier some days to grab a spare from the hospital linen closet if theirs hadn’t made it through the wash—and this…”

“…what about this…?” She pulled a lumpy envelope out and frowned. “It’s heavier than the others.”

“That’s because it’s full of that jewelry I was talking about,” he said. He let her pour the contents out onto the desktop, only to see that it was a jumbled, tangled mess. “Maybe when you’re a bit older we can go through it. I don’t know what you’d like or not.”

“It’s a mess.”

“That’s what it does when someone doesn’t keep it all separated properly.” He then had an idea. “If you want, you can get them all apart, and then I can get you a box for it.”

“That’d be nice.” She poked at the lump, where a teardrop pendant sat shimmering in the light. “So you went with Penguin-ya and Shachi-ya and Bepo-ya to get these?”

“We left Bepo-ya on the ship as a control subject, but yeah, we did,” he confirmed. “The chemistry set we’d stolen before heading over came in handy.”

“I wish I could have seen Flevance in person,” Nauja said quietly, “you know, without the danger.”

“I know, my little seagull; I wish that too.” He pressed a kiss to her hair as he gave her a one-armed hug. “So much of it was white and pastels, even in nature, at such an amount that we should have seen Amber Lead coming earlier.” Letting his eyes go out of focus, Law’s memories slipped back nearly two decades and he swallowed hard. Had it really been that long…? Was his sister’s smile that old? His mother’s gentle voice? His father’s strong hands? The sisters’ guidance? Eventually, he felt Nauja’s hand wipe at his face—when did he start crying? “Thank you.”

“For what…?”

“Being here. Listening. Accepting. It means more than you realize.”

…and honestly? He knew it was more than he realized as well, but he wasn’t about to get into that. They instead began to untangle the knot in front of them, working right until the next patient came in through the front door.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The morning chill settled over Hinba in a low mist as Nauja grabbed her Sora backpack and ran out the kitchen door into the pre-dawn air. She couldn’t figure out why it was this cold and no one was acting like it was unusual, but was glad that it seemed like it was supposed to be normal. She watched the sun creep over the ridge as she made her way to school, where it was clear she was one of the first ones there.

“Good morning, Miss Rikki!” she grinned as she ran into her classroom. None of the other students in her grades cluster had arrived yet, which was honestly fine by her. The woman at the head desk glanced up and smiled.

“My… aren’t you here early?” Miss Rikki chuckled.

“I wanted to know if I could use the lightbox!” Nauja said. “Vaor’s still using ours and won’t give it up.”

“Is that so?” The teacher went over to where the lightbox desk was and switched it on. “What sort of things are you learning about now?”

“The digestive system,” Nauja replied happily. She dug into her backpack and pulled out a looseleaf snail photo of exposed bowels from an injured Marine and placed it on the lightbox surface along with a piece of tracing paper over it. “Isn’t it cool?! I’m not learning everything about it yet, but I am learning about when some things go wrong, and I’m gonna draw a bunch of pictures of it!”

“That’s… lovely…” Miss Rikki grimaced. She watched as Nauja began tracing; no wonder the lightbox was in use at the girl’s house. “…and you’re… allowed to do this…? Encouraged…?”

“Oh, yes! It’s the only way I’m gonna be good at drawing them for real one day! At least to start!”

“Who in the hell did Jacks and Dervla contract,” Miss Rikki muttered. He then coughed, pretending to clear her throat, before addressing Nauja again. “What else do you have to draw?”

“Different kinds of bodies and body parts, but also everything else,” Nauja explained, not looking up from her work. “I can’t bring the naked-parts pictures, because we don’t know how people are here about naked stuff even if we are doctors, and I really shouldn’t have this here, but it’s cool, isn’t it?”

“It’s… not my favorite, but it’s good to see you so excited about your work, Nauja,” Miss Rikki said, forcing a smile. She did not even notice that some of the other students had made their way into the classroom until it was too late, with some of them crowding around the lightbox.

“Whoa, that’s cool!” Nauja looked over her shoulder and saw that a small handful of her classmates were now staring at what she was tracing. “Where’d you get that?!”

“One of the books I have to read for doctor stuff!” Nauja beamed. “It’s someone’s bowels exposed from a severe lass-er-ae-shun!”

“…a what…?”

“Their guts spilled out of a sword wound!”

The small children all oohed and aahed at the gory photo and in-process drawing while their teacher tried to not cry—she really had her work cut out for her with this one.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

It was early in the morning as Law woke up to the feeling of something cold burrowing its way under his blankets. He groaned and rolled over, seeing that Nauja and Professor Nanuk had joined him in the bed, the girl attempting to cuddle in close as she could to stave off the chill.

“Could you have waited half an hour more?” he groaned.

“’S cold…” she whined.

“Seas help me if I ever try to bring you to my Home Blue.” He adjusted the blankets so she was nearly completely covered, and him only up to his neck as he held her close. “It’s cold there like you wouldn’t believe.”

“I thought southern places in the Blues were supposed to be warm!”

“Not this far south; here we’re about the same distance from the Equator as Flevance was in the North,” he murmured. It had admittedly been a while since he was this consistently cold thanks to the Grand Line’s… peculiar weather patterns, not to mention the heat involved in the Polar Tang’s mechanics that made it a hotbox on the best of days. “You’re used to living in a ship that gets really warm.”

“I miss the others,” she replied sleepily. “I miss the Tang.”

“I know you do, kiddo.” He stroked her hair as he lowly hummed a few bars of something he thought he remembered from childhood. “They’re all really proud of you.”

“Yeah…?”

“Yeah.”

Law laid like that for about forty-five minutes—he didn’t want to risk oversleeping though he sure as hell wasn’t getting up yet—before carefully removing himself from the bed and leaving Nauja nestled in the warm blankets. He glanced out the window and chuckled to himself before getting dressed—it was going to be an interesting day.

Sure enough, Nauja was shuffling into the kitchen by the time he was whisking some eggs, a blanket still pulled tightly around her. “My birthday’s next month—it should be hot outside.”

“Too bad,” her father replied. “Say… what’s the weather look like?” She sat down on her chair and groaned. “Nauja… what’s it look like outside?” He watched as she slid off the chair and went to the window, her forehead softly hitting the glass pane before she actually bothered to look outside… and gasped.

“Wait… it snows here?!” She spun around to look at him, eyes wide.

“Why wouldn’t it snow here; we’re closer to the South Pole than we are to the Equator,” he chuckled. He saw how Nauja was almost vibrating in excitement and remembered something. “You weren’t this excited when we visited winter islands in the Grand Line.”

“Yeah, well, those always have snow and this place doesn’t!” she reasoned. “Do you think it’ll snow on my birthday?!”

“It might,” he said. “If you grew up in my homeland, it would be around the warmest day of the year.”

“…because we’re on opposite ends of the Blues, right?!” Good; she was awake enough to begin thinking critically again.

“That’s right,” he replied. “Now grab what you want in your omelette out of the fridge before I pour the eggs.”

“Oh! Yes, Vaor!” Nauja happily went into the fridge and found some leftover bacon, a cheese block, and some leeks and mushrooms that looked like they were about to wilt. “These, please!”

“Good, now go get dressed properly and maybe you can play in the snow a bit before heading off to school,” he said. She then remembered she was still in her pajamas! Nauja ran back to her room, returning when she was warmly dressed and ready to play. She was almost out the door when Law pulled her back in and stuck her on the chair—breakfast first. The entire omelette was downed in almost record time before she ran out and jumped directly into a snowbank. By the time Law went outside to join her, she was already red-faced and soaked to her skin—smiling brightly in the brief morning twilight—and he knew he wouldn’t trade it for anything.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“Hey, do you want to come play with us?”

Nauja glanced up from the book she was just about to pack away, seeing two of her classmates, Carina and Magne, standing there hopefully. Miss Rikki looked like she was still handling other students as everyone packed up to go home.

“I can’t; I’ve got chores.”

“You can do them when you get back,” Carina said.

“Yeah, it’s nothing super-urgent, is it?” Magne asked.

“Well, no…” She slipped the book into her Sora backpack. “I have to sweep up the downstairs including the clinic, feed the Den-Den, and it’s my turn to change the linens in the infirmary and sanitize the medical instruments…”

“Wait, you have to do what?!” Magne marveled. Carina’s mouth dropped open in surprise as well.

“Sanitize medical instruments…? It involves boiling them and…”

“No, the Den-Den!” Carina interrupted. “I didn’t know you had a transponder snail!”

“We have it for emergencies,” Nauja replied. “Don’t people have them for emergencies…?”

“Miss Dervla, yeah, but not a lot of people have them,” Carina said. Mange nodded.

“I don’t think I’ve even seen one.”

“Then maybe if you come over, I can do my chores after we have some fun and you can see the Den-Den!”

“That sounds cool!” Mange grinned. The three children packed the rest of their things and ran out of the schoolhouse, heading down the street towards the clinic. They barreled into the kitchen, kicked off their shoes, and dropped their stuff on the floor, with Nauja poking her head into the corridor.

“Vaor! Back from school! I’ve got friends over!”

“As long as you get your work done,” Vaor replied unseen. It sounded like he was in the consultation room.

“Okay!”

Nauja then grabbed some lettuce from the fridge and led Carina and Magne up the back steps, to the smallest bedroom, which was kept as the private combination-office-and-library. Amongst the dozens of books and papers and the pair of desks, a terrarium sat on its own table with lush greenery and a low-powered heat lamp, a snail shell sitting on a rock.

“Whoa… so that’s a transponder snail…?” Carina marveled. “Why’s it hiding?”

“It does that when it’s sleeping because it’s not hooked up to anything right now,” Nauja explained. She broke the lettuce into tiny pieces and placed it in front of the snail. When it didn’t move, she lightly scratched the shell with her fingernail. “Hey, wake up. It’s food time.”

The snail didn’t move.

“Are you sure there’s one in there?” Magne asked.

“Yeah, I’ve fed it before. Sometimes you gotta…” She picked up the shell and shook it slightly…

Only to scream as the dead snail schlupped out of the shell and plopped onto the terrarium floor.

All three children screamed, in fact, as they ran out of the office and down the stairs. While Carina and Magne decided to grab their stuff and leave, Nauja went straight to the consultation room, where Vaor had one of the fishermen, Lars-ya, up on the examination bench as he looked in his ear.

“Do you have to keep barging in on appointments?” Vaor said through grit teeth. “This is unprofessional.”

“Vaor! Vaor! It’s a disaster! The Den-Den died!”

Vaor’s face scrunched in confusion. “What do you mean ‘the Den-Den died’? We’ve still got another ten years on that thing at the very least.”

“I picked it up and it just slid out of the shell and went plop on the rock!” she whimpered.

“Fuck,” Vaor cursed under his breath. He then looked at his patient with an expression that showed he wanted to scream. “Do you know if your wife can order transponder snails through her store?”

“Lanna can get her hands on a lot of things, but she can’t work miracles,” Lars-ya shrugged. “You can try to catch a snail, but even if you have the tech it doesn’t mean it’ll work.”

“Great,” Vaor sighed. “Just… don’t worry, famke. I’ll clean it up later.”

“…but I was supposed to feed it! I must not have in time…!”

“They just do that sometimes, like people; it’s nothing to worry about. Now let me finish here with Lars-ya, alright?”

“…but… but…!”

“Just go,” he insisted, trying to not sound cross. Nauja then ran up to her room and hid under her blankets, sobbing hysterically as she allowed the severity of the situation weigh on her. She had not seen more than five transponder snails since leaving the Polar Tang, which meant that they had needed to keep that one alive! What were they going to do?! She cried so much that she almost vomited, absolutely sick to her stomach as she curled around Professor Nanuk, trembling.

The little girl did not know how much time passed before she heard her door open and felt the mattress shift with new weight. She peeked out from her blankets to see Vaor sitting there with a mug of tea waiting for her, which she took and held under her face.

“It’s all gone now,” he said, scratching her scalp. “I already got rid of it.”

“Am…” she sniffled, “…am I in trouble…?”

“Not at all,” Vaor replied. “What I said in front of Lars-ya was the truth: these things happen. I’ll figure out how to replace it later, alright?”

She nodded.

“Alright. Now drink your tea and come downstairs for chores when you’re ready. How does fish and rice sound for dinner?”

A grunt.

“Bring your mug down when you’re done,” Vaor said. He then kissed her hair and left, allowing her time to calm down on her own. It took a while of her breathing in the hot steam from the mug before she was steady enough to drink—the thought of anyone from the Polar Tang trying to call them was sharp in her mind as she tried to tell herself that if Vaor said it was okay, then it was okay.

If Vaor said he was going to fix it, then he was going to fix it. Everything was fine. Nothing to worry about, right…? Right.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“What do you mean it can’t be done?!” Law gaped. He was standing in the general store the following day, the proprietor at least attempting to seem empathetic from behind the counter. “I need a snail to keep in contact with everyone from where we used to live! This is essential.”

“That’s all well and good, but properly-raised transponder snails are a rarity to come by in these waters,” Lanna replied calmly. “They’re often restricted to the super-wealthy and the emergency networks local leadership builds.”

“So what you’re saying is that the only person on the island who has a Den-Den Mushi is Dervla, and that’s only because she’s in charge?”

“Yeah. It’ll go to whomever succeeds her once she retires.”

“You barely get newspapers, it’s difficult to get books, and now you’re telling me that transponder snails are hard to come by?”

“You know how much of a hassle it is to get to this island,” she reminded him. “It impacts literally everything and everyone going in or out.” She watched as Law covered his face with his hands and took a deep breath—at least he was actively trying to not be a dick about it. “I know you’re probably used to more things being readily available from your time in Water 7, but this is the South Blue… not just that, but Diura… we used to sail three days to see a doctor between his yearly rounds before you showed up.”

“That’s inhumane.”

“That’s the trade-off we get for not being bothered,” Lanna shrugged. “Is there anything else you were looking for today? Maybe that’ll help.”

Law took a steadying breath—yeah, it was best to change subjects. “Do you know who is the best person to ask about woodcrafts?” She raised an eyebrow and he took a piece of paper from his pocket and showed it to her. “I want to know if anyone can copy this pattern.” The woman studied the paper curiously, taking in the intricate design of flowers, leaves, and grasses that had clearly been copied from a book.

“This Lvneelish?”

“No, but close enough,” Law replied. “It’s from a book on the North Blue that Dr. Ghar-Spartel had. My daughter mentioned she likes it, and I was wondering if I could get something like this on a jewelry box.”

“That is a good question; a lot of us are good with carving, but this is delicate work.” It was then that the chimes on the door rang and someone else walked in—a woman looking miserable in her last months of pregnancy. “Ah, Marla, just the woman I want to see.”

“Daisuke will not pass your daughter in geography if she keeps doodling in class and not turning in homework,” Marla groaned as though they’d had that precise conversation before. Lanna shook her head.

“It’s for the Doc.” She gestured towards Law with a jerk of her head. “Your dad still do woodcarving jobs on the side?”

“Last I checked.” Marla was passed the paper and she narrowed her eyes at it. “This is definitely a Northern design, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Law admitted, almost sheepish. “I haven’t properly met your father yet—do you think he can carve something like that on a small box?”

“We’re on break at the shipyard; let me get what I came here for and you can ask him yourself.”

“Her dad’s the best this side of the current,” Lanna smirked. “How about I just keep an eye out and an ear open for the other thing we talked about, hm?”

“Argued about what she can and can’t get, eh?” Marla wondered, a near-consoling tone to her voice. Law shrugged as she received a package and almost jumped out of his skin when she linked arms with him. “Come on—time’s wasting if you want this to be a secret. This is a secret for your daughter, right?”

“Uhh…”

The grin that crept across Marla’s face was nearly predatory, he decided, as he was forcefully dragged from the store. Hopefully it was going to be as pain-free as possible… though… his hopes were not exactly high.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

It was well after lunch when Law stepped into the schoolhouse, glad that the building was kept warmer than most. An entire week’s worth of new snow and it felt as though it was refusing to let up, which was great to only children and people who didn’t have to leave their own warm places. He left his hat on as he shed his bag and coat, putting them up on a visitors’ peg near the door as his thoughts were lost in the lessons he was going to teach that day. The oldest group had sexual consent, the little ones had hand-washing, and the middle group was—seas help him—getting into why bathing was important…

“So good to see you, Dr. Law,” purred a voice. He nearly jumped out of his skin, only to see that it was the younger of the secretaries, hidden by her desk’s position in regards to the door. Taking off his hat, he put his mittens in it before hanging it too on a peg.

“Same, Janka-ya,” he replied tersely. He honestly had few bits of leftover patience for niceties that particular day, but he was willing to perform if it kept him from being hounded with questions. Get in, teach the day’s lessons, then leave; that’s all he really wanted to do. “Are classes on time today?”

“They seem to be,” she replied. “I don’t think any are behind, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“A little,” he admitted. Law went over to the radiator and held his hands close to it, glad for the device’s intense warmth. “I want to get the oldest kids’ lesson done before they get sent off to their jobs.”

“Surely you don’t have to get to that immediately,” Janka frowned. Wait, no, that was more of a pout, wasn’t it? “You can wait here with me until Dia is ready with her group.”

“Don’t bother me, Janka-ya—I’ve got a lot I need to think about to keep the kids on their toes,” he replied. Which was true; he had only taught a handful of sessions thus far and the schoolchildren’s capacity for curiosity knew little bounds. His hands finally warmed up and he turned, only to see that Janka was now standing right next to him. How…? “What?”

“You cold?” she asked. What were her eyelashes doing? Was there something in her eyes…?

“If you haven’t noticed, it’s snowing outside,” he replied. “Usually that accompanies cold weather; I’m fine now.”

“Pity. I could help you warm up in the future. Maybe… if you come a little earlier…?”

“I have patients that need attending and a curriculum to keep on top of; I don’t have extra time.”

“You sure a curriculum is the only thing you need to keep on top of?” she asked. He tried to move and she blocked his way. “Maybe… you need something to be on top of you?”

Janka winked and suddenly everything clicked into place in Law’s brain—oh, fuck, she was flirting with him! He then noticed how he was essentially trapped between the wall, the heater, and the secretary who was sizing him up with very specific intent. Swallowing hard, he pressed himself against the wall, trying to stay as far from her as possible.

“That is very inappropriate, Janka-ya,” he replied shakily. “This is not the place for that.”

“Then maybe I can warm you up at my place…?” A grin crept across her face that made his chest feel tight and his stomach awful. “Your place…?”

Law’s brain felt as though it was shutting down. Seas, when was the last time someone propositioned him like this? Propositioned him at all?! It was before he had his homicidal aloof loner reputation as one of the most notorious Supernovas, that was for certain, and he absolutely hated how helpless he felt as he was cornered. Couldn’t use his Devil Fruit without questions, had no access to Conqueror’s Haki, he was afraid to even touch her…

“Dr. Law…? Are you, uh…?” Law looked towards an open door that had a small handful of teenagers gathered around it, staring at the scene as though they walked in on something private.

“Ah, class is in session! Excellent!” He slid along the wall until he was out of Janka’s grasp and grabbed his bag on the way in, not allowing himself a second to breathe until he was in the classroom with the door shut.

“You haven’t seen her with some of the traders, have you?” Dia, the teacher, groaned in exasperation. Law shook his head silently, the man still a bit in shock at the interaction. “I’ll talk to her.”

“Thanks,” Law squeaked. He then took a deep breath to calm himself and looked at the students. “Alright class, today we’re going to be talking about why what Miss Janka did was not okay. Everyone to your seats.”

At least he was able to do that.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Despite the nights beginning to grow longer, Law understood how fortunate he was that there had been extra rooms in the clinic’s living areas as soon as the air grew a chill. The clinic was likely built to accommodate two or three families so medical staff had no problem living on-site. What it meant for him, however, was that there was plenty of extra room to move about in the cold months, allowing for a room meant specifically for training.

“Right here, famke,” he said, bringing her through the motion of stabbing a practice dummy. Her knife was in one shaky hand, grip backward so the flat of the blade could rest along her forearm when not being embedded in someone’s torso. She frowned at it, not enjoying the movement.

“It’s hard to hold,” Nauja pouted. “Why can’t I hold it like normal?”

“You won’t always be able to grab it like normal,” he reasoned. “Sometimes you will have to grab it weird and not have time to adjust the grip.”

“Like when?”

“Like when you have to take the knife from someone’s sheath and bury it in their side.” Law then placed his hand over Nauja’s and pressed the tip of the knife against the dummy’s side. “Now, what will this hit?”

“The… ninth and tenth ribs,” she replied, brow furrowed as she thought. She then adjusted the knife. “This way will go between them and hit the left kidney and part of the stomach. The other side is the right kidney and the gall bladder.”

“Good, good.” He then let her adjust her grip and placed the knife tip back against the dummy’s side. “Thrusting up here hits what?”

“The spleen.”

“…and maybe…?”

“Maybe a… lung…?”

“Good.” Law then saw that Nauja was frowning as she stared at the knife in her hand. He could tell something was bothering her. “What is it?”

“I know this is in case someone tries to hurt me, but…” She crinkled her nose. “Aren’t we doctors? This feels a lot like how to kill.”

“Not at all,” he assured. “You need to know where things are in the body if you’re going to draw them, or treat them medically, or fight off someone without hitting a vital organ. That takes a lot of practice.”

“…but why would I need to know how to fight here?”

“You never can be too prepared.” Law pressed a kiss into her hair and let out a low chuckle. “Alright, now show me again where to stab to get under the sternum again.”

Nauja wrinkled her nose and placed the blade accordingly.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

It was finally Nauja’s birthday. Although it was still winter, the weather had warmed just enough to turn everything slightly slushier. Heavy, wet snow fell the entire day, encouraging Law to make the prudent decision to stay inside. At least Nauja herself didn’t mind, as she enjoyed days where she stayed in and was allowed to study alongside Law. He surprised her with umeboshi onigiri for lunch and Flevench-style pea soup for dinner, afterwards bringing the celebration into the front sitting room where a fire was already warming the hearth from “business hours”. Flexing his Devil Fruit for the first time that week, he shambled three wrapped packages onto the table next to the cake, which made his daughter gasp.

“Really?!” she marveled. He nodded silently, allowing her to pull the nearest package towards her and open it up: an art and drafting set filled with pens and pencils—regular and in colors—as well as a couple sketchbooks and some varied straight-edges, measuring utensils, and other miscellanea. “Wow! That’s so cool! Thanks!”

“Don’t thank me just yet; open the rest of them,” he chuckled. She pulled another package towards her and tore the paper off—a wooden box, decorated with an elaborate pattern that had been carved into the lid and sides.

“What is it?” she asked, tilting her head. She opened it carefully to find that it was lined with a blue velvet and had many different internal sections.

“It’s a jewelry box,” he explained. “Macksson Jan made it. We can put the things from the envelope in there to keep it nice.”

“…oh. Okay.”

Law watched as Nauja stared at the intricately-carved box, running her fingers lightly over the design. She sucked in a sniffle as tears began to well in her eyes. “Famke…?”

“Law-san… I don’t know what I did to deserve this,” she said quietly. She sniffled again and hiccuped before wiping tears away with the heel of her palm. “I’m just some kid Bepo-ya found…”

“Where did this come from?” he wondered aloud. His hand found the top of her head, where he began to scratch lightly at her scalp. She struggled to not cry and it made his heart feel both heavy and dangerously fragile. “I thought we’ve been through this.”

“I know… but…” She sniffled loudly, trying to suck up some snot back into her nose. “It’s hard…”

Ah. Something was making her rethink things, whether it was a difficult time adjusting, or maybe something someone said, or possibly even her own mind beginning to play tricks on her. She was a bit young for it, but then again… he had been when that first started himself. Children generally suffered from moods as they grew emotionally and she was being subject to one. The only thing now was how to get her out of it…

…and maybe… maybe it was good to have all the cards on the table. His daughter deserved that much, after all.

“Nauja?” He gently turned her face towards him and brushed away more tears. “Can I tell you something? Something I don’t know if I ever said out loud in words before?”

“Not… not even to my uncles?”

“No one on the Polar Tang knows this.”

The girl sat there and digested those words. Something no one else knew? No one at all? She placed the jewelry box down on the cushion next to Professor Nanuk and adjusted so that she was sitting cross-legged on the couch.

Please.

“When I was your age,” he began, each word measured and deliberate, “before I met Cora-san, before we knew Amber Lead was killing us, I went to church. My parents took your Tante Lami and I there once a week, most weeks, the last time being about a month before… before I lost them.”

“Church…?” She tilted her head curiously. “What’s that?”

“It’s a place for religion… for faith… for spirituality… for the part of us that can’t be mended with bandages and stitches and medicine… when done right, a church is a place where people can find peace, understand things in different ways, be a loving community, and be inspired to do good, if not there then elsewhere in their lives. It can augment mental and emotional therapy for some people and help keep them even-keeled between sessions. Again, when done right, it has the ability to be highly valuable.”

“Was it… not done right…?”

“I think it tried, which is the best most churches can do.” Law took a deep breath as he thought back to hardwood pews and soft candlelight; he could almost smell the sweet and heady mulberry incense and hear the bells and organ pipes in the rafters. “The church in Flevance would do things like talk about salvation—unconditional freedom and forgiveness in this life and the next—which wasn’t something I really understood. When you grow up privileged in a place where even the poor are wealthy by other countries’ standards, such a thing is a difficult concept to grasp, especially as a child. I was more concerned with other stuff… more irritated with other stuff…”

“Like what…?”

“‘Everything happens for a reason’,” he said, the words flowing over his tongue for the first time in so, so long. “The church ran the schools for younger students in Flevance and it was something the religious sisters and brothers we had as teachers said. Often. I didn’t believe it then and not for a long, long time after.”

“Why…? Were they mean?”

“They could have been, in another time or place, but no they were very nice. They loved all of us children the same whether we went to church or not, whether we believed what they said or not, and said that if we were to ever think of anything preached to us as true, it was that. We had to find our own way to make sense of it, but they encouraged us to take that phrase to heart.”

“So… everything…?” Nauja puzzled over that for a moment. “I thought things happen because people do or don’t do things.”

“You are correct, but it’s something they said to make us feel better here, to help make sense of things in here.” He tapped the middle of her chest with two fingers, then her forehead. “I thought they meant stuff like when Tante Lami got into my room and tore it apart in play, or when my parents had a patient who passed away unexpectedly, or when a classmate would break a bone after slipping on ice. That wasn’t it at all.”

“What was it?”

“It was preparing us, in case one of us would not find salvation with the others,” Law admitted quietly, his voice cracking slightly. “It doesn’t mean what happens is always right, or good, or that you will ever understand why; it’s hopefully something that clicks into place later on so that the past doesn’t weigh the better parts of you down. By thinking about it, you can move forward and not let ghosts haunt you.”

Nauja looked away, her gaze towards the art set on the table yet far-off and distant. Her father waited for her to say something, yet she did not.

“If I had not been the only one to live,” he continued, “then I would have never lost my faith in the good in the world. My rage would have never led me to Doflamingo or to my Devil Fruit. Amber Lead would have killed me if bullets and fire didn’t. I would have never had to relearn what was good with Cora-jiisan or the crew, I would have never gone on the journey I did, and I certainly would have never agreed to stop at the island we met on.” He watched as she drew up her legs and hugged her knees in an effort to become smaller. “I would have never known that you needed me like I needed Cora-jiisan, and I would have never realized that what he wanted was not for me to go headlong into a suicidal revenge mission, but to pass on the love he gave me.” Holding her gently by the shoulders, he waited until she looked back at him to continue. “I don’t know what forces brought us together if any did at all, but what I do know is that you are my reason, Trafalgar D. Water Lawsdottir Nauja. It doesn’t have to make sense to you just as much as it needs to make sense to me.”

Errant tears were now streaming down both their faces—too much more and things would become ugly.

“You lived,” he stated. “That’s what you did to deserve to inherit love. I lived, and that’s all I needed as well. If more people knew that, then maybe I could take you home to my family, or you might know first-hand how much of a klutz Cora-jiisan was. If more people understood… then the world might be different.”

“If there was a church here, would you take me?” she asked, voice barely above a whisper.

“I…” he swallowed hard, “I don’t know.”

“Would you… go by yourself…?”

“I don’t know.”

“Did Oma and Opa and Tante Lami and Cora-jiisan find it? Salvation?”

“I like to think they did.” He leaned down and kissed the top of her head, where he lingered for a moment as he drew strength from her presence. “We’re here for a reason, famke, and so far, being your father and seeing you celebrate birthdays is enough for me. Now come on; open your last present.”

Nodding quietly, Nauja took the third parcel from the table and dragged it into her lap. She slid her fingers under an opening in the paper and stopped.

“I’m the only one in school who was adopted outside their blood-family,” she admitted. “A couple kids live with grandparents, and one girl lives with her aunt and uncle, but there’s no one else like us.”

“…and that too is for a reason.” He gently rubbed her back. “Come on. Open it.”

Nauja carefully tore at the paper and revealed a small stack of books that she quickly looked through: the newest Sora volume, a volume of reference poses, a collection of Northern folktales, and a book on unique localized architecture. She opened the last book and saw in the index not only a section on her father’s hometown, but hers as well. She stared at a photo of a canal full of gondolas and yagara bulls and sniffled.

“…as long as you need me, and longer still,” he murmured. She looked at him with watery eyes and he ruffled her hair. “So, what do you think?”

“Thank you, Vaor. I love them.” She then glanced over at the cake that was still sitting on the table and began to fidget. “Can we…?”

“We can,”  he replied. Nauja breathed a sigh of relied—something to solidly change the subject, and not only that, it was whole cake all to the two of them! It was perfect.

As they ate their cake, Law sat on the couch with a book of his own, while Nauja knelt in front of the table as she began to test her new drafting supplies and reference materials. He glanced over once in a while to see that she was paying close attention to the particular way that elevated canals worked. Had she lived next to one? He couldn’t remember…

Eventually, Law left Nauja in the sitting room as he went to put together some tea for her and pour a couple fingers of a gifted whisky for himself. Was he technically on-call? Yes, but if he couldn’t drink the stuff during a special occasion on a full stomach, when could he? He brought the teapot, their Sora mugs, and the whisky back on a tray, watching her nose wrinkle at the sight of his drink.

“That’s stinky,” she scowled.

“Your opa drank it, as did both of my opas,” he shrugged, sitting down to lean back into the couch. “I don’t expect you to like it—you didn’t even like that sip of beer Ikkaku-ya gave you.”

“Don’t remind me,” she cringed, pouring herself some tea. They took more cake to have with their drinks, both quiet as they continued their dessert in peace.

When he was nearly done with both cake and whisky, an odd feeling settled over Law. It was as though a weight shifted on his shoulders—not quite lifted and yet eased in a way. Two years prior, he would have not been able to predict that this was ever in his future. Seas, he wouldn’t’ve been able to predict it when he first saw Nauja, the girl nearly half-feral and malnourished from neglect, that she would be the entire reason behind his retirement. Now, after everything, she knew more about him than even Bepo. She understood him and his motivations in a way no one else did, even if it hadn’t all set in yet, and there was something… oddly reassuring about it.

Eventually, all children were likely to hit their limits and Nauja was no exception. He chuckled inwardly as her head bobbed in exhaustion, her fight to stay awake nearly valiant in a way.

“You can go to bed if you want,” he said. She shook her head.

“I wanna stay up,” she whined. Nauja abandoned her books and crawled up onto the sofa and cuddled into Law’s side. He let his arm drape around her and she hummed in happiness—the sharpness of the whisky, the smokiness of the fire, the fragrance of the tea, the sweetness of the leftover cake, the electricity and rumbles of the oncoming change in the storm, the warmth of each other and the flames… it was going to be a birthday she would never forget, and neither would he.

Eventually, the storm began to roll in and Law began to drift off himself. He imagined the smell of the fire as Cora-san’s cigarettes, as the fireplace in his parents’ house, as something warm and comforting beyond his daughter… a reality where some things went a little more his way…

Just before he was nearly asleep, a thudding pounding rocked the door, jolting both father and daughter awake. Law went to the door to open it, only for Daisuke to come in, supporting his wife Marla with one arm draped across his shoulders. While both were windwhipped and drenched from the heavy snowfall, she was clearly in pain, which set off alarm bells in Law’s mind.

“You have to help,” Daisuke said between heavy breaths. “She’s gone into labor.”

“Wait… where’s Svana-ya?”

“She’s seeing to her brother’s younger granddaughter,” Marla said. She took a deep breath as her hand went to her stomach. “This one wasn’t supposed to come until next month.”

“…but obstetrics isn’t exactly my field of expertise…”

“I don’t think this baby cares,” Daisuke replied as Law began to support Marla from her other side. He caught sight of Nauja peering at them from the couch and he blanched. “What about…?”

“Hey, famke, remember the illustrations about childbirth in our textbooks?”

“Yeah…?”

“Well get ready, because you’re going to help in-person.” Law led Marla and Daisuke back to the operating theater and helped sit the woman down before beginning to grab things off of shelves and out of cupboards. “Get Marla-ya one of the spare gowns; I don’t want her in those soaked clothes.”

“Yes, Vaor!” Nauja chirped. She scurried back out of the theater and down towards the linen cupboard, giving the adults precious seconds to themselves.

“When was the last time you helped deliver a kid?” Daisuke asked. Law shook his head.

“I can in theory, but it wasn’t part of my clinicals.” Which was the truth, but the ins and outs of his unorthodox medical training wasn’t something that really mattered at that moment.

“Not even for your own daughter’s birth?” Marla wondered as she peeled off her soaked jumper.

“Lot of reasons, long story, but we’re not going to talk about that now.” Nauja then returned with a fresh patient gown, which she shoved in Marla’s hands. “Alright, now get the lights and wash your hands really good.”

“Yes, sir!”

Daisuke shot Law one final incredulous look before Marla caught their attention again as a contraction caused her to hiss in pain. They left her side only to scrub in best they could, because there wasn’t long before the woman began full-on cussing.

What followed next was one of the most stressful hours of Law’s life. He was never going to admit that he’d only ever glanced at obstetrics in passing, with Penguin and Shachi’s giggling immaturity having been the most those texts had gotten use until he went over the topic with Nauja all those months ago. It made him glad he had, as both of them were thrown into the terrifying and messy situation headlong, for at least they were both somewhat (if poorly) prepared. Eventually, a baby cried its first cry and was nestled in his mother’s arms, Marla so relieved and exhausted she could barely speak.

“Storm,” she breathed. “I think that’s his name.”

“Not after your dad?” Daisuke smirked.

“No—his arrival was something to weather, like what’s going on outside.” She raised her eyes towards Law and Nauja, who were both beginning to crash as they cleaned up on waning adrenaline. “We’re doing fine; you two should go rest.”

“Marla-ya, I…”

“I’m a mom now and that means I can boss people around,” she joked. “In all seriousness, you look like you’re going to fall over.”

“We’re okay,” Nauja insisted. She rubbed at her eyes, the late hour getting to her. “We can stay up…”

“I’ll get you if we need anything, how about that?” Daisuke offered. Nauja nodded at that with a tiny squeak, while Law exhaled heavily. Fine—he had them there.

“We’ll be in the waiting room if you need us,” he said. Law then ushered Nauja out so that the new family could have some privacy, the pair finding their way back to the front sitting room. The fire in the hearth was nearly out, so he put a couple more logs on and made sure the flames caught before sitting down a bit too hard on the couch.

“Vaor…?” Nauja whispered as she joined him, cuddling in close.

“Hmm…?”

“We’re here because someone needed to help Storm be born, right? Is that the reason?”

“Maybe.” He smiled hazily at her and let out a chuckle low in his throat. “Slaap goed.”

“Sleep well,” she echoed, curling back up into his side. He wrapped his arm around her and they stayed like that until Daisuke woke them five hours later with food ready in the kitchen.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

A/N: I don’t know how many of you all realize how Catholic-coded Law is and when I say Catholic-coded I mean after a happy upbringing there was an awful event that made him lose his faith and question everything he’d known, only to slowly get back to accepting what he was brought up in and where he is currently, even if a lot of what he sees at-large makes him uncomfortable and by no means has erased the fury he once felt. My circumstances were (obviously) not the same, but a lot of the emotional journey that Law goes through via Flevance and Amber Lead really strikes a chord with me due to applicability with my own faith journey and that’s part of why I adore his character so much.

Also, just as a disclaimer, once I wrote Visiting Home [FFN/AO3], my brain went and decided that something similar probably happened in canon, so to me it’s my emotional support fanon, and by emotional support I mean crying happens a lot.

[chuuyrr]

Baby! Reader being obsessed with the baby shark song (this detail was inspired by @i-cant-sing’s hcs of baby! Reader with jjk characters). She keeps singing the song everywhere constantly—while doing her zoomies, coloring her doodles, while swinging from panda, etc. she’s given an ikea shark toy (the one that went viral in Japan lol). So she’s started to incorporate the shark plushie (it’s called Blåhaj officially, reader can’t pronounce that, so she calls hers “bleghh”) into her daily baby shark song routine. While singing the baby shark song she hits the face whoever she’s near with the plushie to the beat of the song. What is each character’s reaction (gojo, nanami, SUKUNA, the students) to baby reader’s baby shark song obsession, both before and after the incorporation of being hit by her shark plushie?

scarlet witch! baby fushiguro! reader's obsession with the baby shark song

jujutsu kaisen x reader

masterlist of the series

warning(s): none!

[insert that's the cutest fucking thing ever audio]

you have no idea how much serotonin i got from reading and writing this prompt. like my heart melted??

thank you so much for request <3

being the child you were, you had a lot of favorite things.

you loved sweets, you loved playing and zooming around and most of all you loved baby songs; and one of which was the baby shark song.

gojo noticed how you would sing it everytime you drew with paper and crayons, whenever you did your zoomies and whenever you were swinging from panda.

gojo literally has a video of you singing the song in your cute and baby voice that he watches in during his meetings whenever he gets bored and misses you. he also boasts the video to the other faculty and to the students.

gojo bought you the famous ikea shark toy that became a hit since it reminded him of you so much!

and girl when i tell the way you squealed and made happy noises the moment he gave it you.

you were incredibly happy to receive the ikea shark toy from your father. you practically tackled gojo in a hug and thanked him as he kisses the top of your head.

"thank you! thank you! thank you!" it definitely became your second favorite toy (you still love pikachu)

gojo found it extremely cute of you to call the ikea shark toy "bleghh". you couldn't pronounce it as "blåhaj", so that's you end up saying.

"no, baby it is blåhaj." gojo takes a video of you as he tried to teach you the proper pronunciation.

you nod and smile at the camera, raising the shark plushie like it was simba from the lion king. "bleghh!"

gojo might just die from your cuteness.

and you ended up incorporating "bleghh" whenever you sang the baby shark song you loved so much.

gojo satoru

gojo was the first one to witness you incorporating the shark toy he got you whenever you sang.

your father was lounging in the living room with you, watching you sing the baby shark song and swing "bleghh" in the air happily.

he watched as he smiled, until you ran up to him and literally bonked the shark plushie to his face along with the beat of the baby shark song while giggling.

gojo literally giggles and laughs along with you, finding it so adorable of you to do that and begins to sing it with you.

he definitely has a video of you doing that and it is his favorite.

nanami kento

nanami would be so confused the first time you bonked "bleghh" to his face.

he first heard of you singing the baby shark song when he was asked by gojo to look after you.

the moment he sees you holding a the famous idea shark toy, nanami couldn't help but smile as you incorporated it with your singing.

he doesn't mind you doing it, he doesn't get mad because you're too cute for your own good.

nanami literally smiles around you and laughs, but he would never show this sweet and soft side of him when gojo and other students are around.

ryomen sukuna

the king of curses is confused at how you are able to bring an item (the shark plushie) with you in his domain.

like, how did that even work? you were astral projecting again, weren't you?

his first reaction when you started singing the baby shark song was literally "what the fuck?"

what kind of song were you singing? is this what children do nowadays?

sukuna expresses an annoyed look whenever you sing and swing "bleghh" around his domain. but he's not actually bothered by it.

sukuna does find it weird how this shark interests you as much as the other cursed spirits and yellow mouse creature did.

he saw nothing special towards the idea shark toy that gojo gave you.

sukuna is literally astonished at your courage when you bonked the shark toy to his face and to the beat of the baby shark song you were singing.

no human has ever done that to him, so he is incredibly shook.

did he just lower his guard at you?

"OI, WHAT WAS THAT FOR—he starts to raise his voice at you, but when he saw the bright and happy smile on your face?

god, something just bewitched him to shut up and sigh as you giggled.

"very funny, human." he says sarcastically, picking you up to settle you on his lap as you continued singing baby shark.

sukuna's a softie for baby fushiguro.

jujutsu high students

yuji and nobara would probably gawk at your cuteness whenever you incorporated "bleghh" to your singing. they would literally coo with their hearts melted.

they don't mind getting bonked in the face with "bleghh".

in fact, they would even do it too. these two would sing and bonk someone's face with your shark plush.

it made you very happy <3

megumi doesn't mind getting bonked in the face as long as you were the one who did it, but if yuji, nobara or any other person did it?

he will gladly whack their heads. no excuses or whatever.

maki and panda finds it weird just like sukuna, but they tolerate it because you're too cute for your own good. they sometimes trick you into doing it to the students of kyoto just because.

inumaki would clap to the beat of your singing as you bonk "bleghh" at someone's face. he's very supportive of it.

[theleftovertaco]

Petty Rivalry- Fred Weasley x Reader

I got an ask maybe 4 months ago asking me to write a fic where reader and fred are rivals and then they fuck but life's a bitch so I'm just getting to it now. Here u go lol. Made some changes so now the reader is a gryffindor chaser tho.

Warnings: smut, sub!fred, oral (fem receiving), unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it kiddos)

"Weasley, you cunt!"

"Hey!"

"Not you, George. Sorry!" You shouted above the whooshing noises of the brooms around you. Fred zoomed past you.

"Not my fault you were in the way of a bludger!"

"It literally is your fault! Your job as a beater is to keep us safe, dipshit!"

"Oi! You two. Get your shit together before we lose!" Angelina shouted as she flew past.

You set one more glare Fred's way before flying off. Between bickering, dodging, and passing, Ravenclaw was catching up and close to winning as both seekers raced around the pitch in search for the Golden snitch.

As Potter seemed to spot the small golden ball, he flew past the two of you, and within a few minutes, the game was over.

Angelina pulled you aside after your team had celebrated, shoving a finger in your face.

“You and Fred need to get it together. If you kept arguing you could have distracted the other players and cost us our win.”

You rolled your eyes and batted her hand away.

"He's the one whos always being difficult, not me!"

Angelina scoffed, "You're both arseholes to each other. Get over yourselves. Either learn to cooperate or I'll be looking for a replacement chaser and beater." She turned away and walked off, you trailing frantically behind her.

"Ange!"

"Look," she turned back, "I love you both, but quidditch is important to me, and it could help me get an internship with the Montrose Magpies, I need to secure a win, or at least a well run team."

You paused for a second, then nodded.

"Yeah, alright, I'll talk to him later today after our celebration in the common room."

Angelina seemed to relax at that, clapping you on the shoulder than walking off to join the rest of the team.

You sighed, and made your way to Gryffindor common room.

..........................

Gryffindor's common room raged about with laughter, as food and shots of firewhiskey were shared (no one asked where that came from).

You took a deep breath, and walked quickly over to where Fred was standing.

"Hey."

He glanced over at you in distrust. "Hello?"

"How are you?"

"Fine, why?"

"No reason."

"Great."

"What's great?"

"You can leave me alone now is what's great."

You rolled your eyes.

"Look, Weasley, I was trying to be nice. Work things out so we could both stay on the team together."

"We wouldn't have anything to work out if you would get your head out of your arse for five minutes during our matches."

"Me? You're the one who keeps aiming bludgers at my head, you know you're supposed to aim them away, right? Or at least towards the other team, not someone on your own."

"They wouldn't nearly hit you if you weren't in the way!"

You barked out a laugh, "That's bullshit, I am perfectly fine with my job, or I would be if you weren't out to get me all the damn time!"

By this point, you were both attracting some attention, and Angelina dragged you away while Katie did the same with Fred.

"Both of you, knock it off."

You whipped your head around to look at her, "But I tried to make amends like you said, I even-"

"Leave it alone, plus, there's an issue in the main hallway we need you to come look at."

"Why do you need me?"

Angelina just dragged you further along.

"Ange, what kind of damn issue is so important that, aaGH-" You exclaimed as you were shoved into a closet, and a very tall figure.

"Who the fuck- ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME ANGE!" You saw Fred's equally pissed off face in the dim light hanging from the top of the closet.

"You two work your shit out, we aren't letting you out until you do."

Fred yelled out in frustration, banging on the door.

"KATIE, ANGIE, LET US OUT RIGHT FUCKING NOW!"

There was only light giggling in response, and you knew there was no way you were leaving that broom closet any time soon.

You spent the next ten minutes pacing the room, trying to find a way out of the closet.

"Can you stop pacing for five seconds? It's driving me insane."

"I wouldn't have to if you hadn't gotten us locked up in here in the first place!"

"How did I get us here? Last I checked we both hated each other, so they wanted us both in here!"

"I was trying to be nice to you back there! To make amends!"

Fred threw his hands in the air.

"Well look where that got the both of us."

You stood face to face with him, eyes locking.

"Why do you hate me so much?" You asked him.

"Why do you hate me so much?"

You scoffed, "You can't just answer a question with the exact same question."

"Like hell I can. And you never answered!"

"Because I asked you first! I mean I just don't understand why it's so hard for you to just not be a dick." You turned your back and resumed your pacing.

"Y/N, it's not that, it's just-"

"Just what, because I am sick and tired of you acting as if I am the worst thing to ever happen to you, why do you hate me so goddamn much, I mean-"

"I DON'T HATE YOU DAMMIT! I LOVE YOU!"

You paused for a second, and turned back.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I've been attracted to you since second year!"

You took a second to process this information.

"So why are you such an arsehole then? For the past 5 years you have been!”

You rolled you eyes.

“Nope. Absolutely not. Liking me was not an excuse to be a dick. And don’t try some ‘I didn’t know how to express my feelings’ bullshit!”

Fred looked at you shocked.

“But… I told you that I liked you. And now I’m getting the feeling you might like me.”

“Thats… besides the point, and even if I did, that still doesn’t excuse you from being a dick, I only responded to you in the same way you always treated me!”

“Right, and I’m sorry for that, Y/N. Please allow me to make it up to you.”

Fred held you face in his hands, and you fought an instinct to jerk away.

“How the hell do you plan on making up for five years of assholery?”

Suddenly you were shoved back into the wall. Fred dropped to his knees, unbuckling your jeans.

“Please, let me make it up to you.”

He dragged your jeans down.

“Fred, what are you doing!?”

“Say the word, and I’ll stop. Please, let me make it up to you.”

Fred looked up at you with wide eyes, and you paused for a moment before nodding. He resumed, pulling you underwear past your legs, and lifted up one of your legs before diving into you.

“Fred, I- fuck!”

He dragged his tongue along your folds and nosed at your clit.

“Want you. Want your cunt, your lips, your body, please.”

You carded your fingers through his hair, dragging him closer to you.

“Fuck, want you too.”

Fred continued until you pulled him back up by his hair to meet you. You hastily unbuckled his belt and undid his trousers to take out his cock. Spitting in your hand, you ran your hand up and down his dick, causing him to let out a series of curses and moans.

He lifted you up by your thighs, and you placed his cock at your entrance, and Fred let out a whine as he pushed in.

“Fuck, love, you feel good.” He readjusted you in his arms and began fucking up into you, his thrusts making him hit that spot inside you.

“Fuck, Fred!”

The two of you continued for what seemed like forever until Fred hooked an arm under your leg and his hand wrapped around you so he could play with your clit.

“Fred, I’m gonna come.”

“I am too, love.” You felt your orgasm arrive and as you did you clenched down on his cock, causing him to release inside of you.

A few moments passed before he set you down, both of you breathing heavily.

“Your partially forgiven.”

“Partially? I just fucked your brains out, how am I partially forgiven?”

You let out a giggle.

“You take me out on a date, and I’ll consider you forgiven.”

Fred brought you into his arms, and laid a kiss on the top of your head.

“Deal.”

A moment passed, and after you both were dressed and had collected yourselves, you banged on the door to be let out.

“Angie? Kate, we’ve resolved our issues, you can let us out now!”

They opened the door, and as you both left you could hear them snickering.

Angelina shouted out from behind you, “Yeah, we heard you both resolving your issues from the other side of the door.”

Fred threw his head back half in laughter and half in exasperation while you stood there, red faced with your head in your hands.

“Next time, maybe resolve your issues in a bedroom?” Katie practically howled out.

“Shove off, Bell!”

[pies-writes-and-more]

allergic to you

Word Count: 3, 713

Pairing: Tsukishima Kei x High School Age!Fem!Reader

Warnings: some swear words I guess, but as per usual, it’s just fluff from me. 

A/N: Guess who’s finally joined another fandom lol hello Haikyuu fandom! Pls be kind, it’s my first time writing for this fandom but I am in love with Karasuno boys, it’s problematic. Anyways, please let me know if you liked it! Sorry if I didn’t quite capture him the way other writers do haha. Also, Y/N = Your (Last) Name, just cause typing Y/L/N is exhausting lol my b

(Not my gif, credits to the original creator!)

Yamaguchi was trying his very hardest not to laugh, his hands clasped together in front of his lips to stifle his giggles as the tall blond boy he had known for years just looked at him desperately.

“It’s not funny,” Tsukishima’s lips formed into a frown (almost a pout), looking away from his friend nervously. His fingers played with some chopsticks, poking at his uneaten lunch.

Yamaguchi had never see Tsukishima Kei nervous. Volleyball games? Totally calm. Math class? Easy. Exam season? Piece of cake.

But put Tsukishima near a girl? No, scratch that. Not just any girl. Put Tsukishima near Y/N? It was all over for him. Suddenly, this 190cm tall boy wanted to shrink small enough to run away and not be noticed.

“It’s a little funny, Tsukki,” Yamaguchi insisted, finally letting out just a tiny chuckle that he just couldn’t hold back. “I think you’re overreacting. Just a bit.”

Tsukishima’s eyes turned back to the other boy, staring at him as if analyzing him, “How could I be overreacting? I’m telling you, I’m allergic!”

Yamaguchi was really trying his best to be supportive, knowing that talking about things was already hard for Tsukishima, especially when involving a particularly cute girl. “You think... you’re allergic... to Y/N,” Yamaguchi retorted slowly, repeating how Tsukishima started this convo with.

“Don’t be an idiot,” Tsukishima scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Obviously it’s some product she uses or something,” his nose scrunched up slightly as he tried to think of what it could possibly be. “Like that hand lotion she uses. The one that smells like vanilla and brown sugar,” Tsukishima proclaimed, nodding to himself like he had solved the mystery.

The green haired boy was still trying his best to be supportive. He nodded slowly, giving a forced smile to his best friend as he slowly spiralled into insanity. He had never seen Tsukishima this desperate for answers before. “Hasn’t she let you use some of that hand lotion?” He wondered aloud, remembering very specifically how red Tsukishima’s ears got when she rubbed a bit into a rash he had gotten on his hand.

“Gotta take good care of your hands if you play volleyball, Tsukishima-san!” Y/N had beamed, her fingers massaging the cream in.

Tsukishima had practically fainted that day, though he’d never admit it.

The blond’s frown tightened, holding his hand to his chin in thought, “Right. So not the hand lotion then.”

“Maybe she got a new perfume?” Yamaguchi offered, nibbling on some of his lunch while Tsukishima thought it out.

“No, she’s still using the same one,” He mumbled, and Yamaguchi smirked to himself, knowing that Tsukishima would’ve never admitted before that he knew little details like this about her. 

“Well. what kinds of symptoms do you have? Maybe that’ll narrow it down,” Yamaguchi suggested, leaning his head back on the wall behind them. It wasn’t unusual for Tsukishima to want to eat some place quiet, but today had been the first day that he had practically dragged Yamaguchi to this small secluded spot behind the school. The two of them sat against a wall to eat, though Tsukishima’s lunch had been completely forgotten.

“I just-” Tsukishima hesitated, eyebrows furrowing in annoyance as he tried to word how his body felt every time she was around. “I always feel so lightheaded. And my heartbeat’s always irregular too. Sometimes it feels like I can’t breathe properly.” His hand slid into his jacket pocket, pulling out his phone and tilting the screen towards Yamaguchi to show him a medical diagnostic page on the web. “Some people say these are symptoms of allergies. Or an anxiety attack. But I’m leaning more towards allergies.”

Yamaguchi squinted at the text, “You... Googled it?” He asked, a playful smile on his lips, glancing up at Tsukishima, amused.

“Well, what else am I supposed to do?” Tsukishima scoffed, scrolling through the page. “I don’t know what else it could be. It’s not with anyone else. It can’t be the classroom either, cause when she’s not around, I don’t feel anything.”

“Hm. So what’re you going to do about it?” Yamaguchi asked, going along with this ‘allergic’ idea as much as he could. He knew Tsukishima was very rational and even if he suggested what he figured was happening, Tsukishima would never listen.

“D-Do?” Tsukishima blinked. He hadn’t thought about what the next step was.

“Well I assume you don’t want to keep feeling that like right? You could always ask the teacher to move you, I suppose. Then ask her not to attend any of our games. Avoiding her for the rest of your life seems like the best choice doesn’t it?” Yamaguchi asked innocently, closing up his lunch box and taking a sip from his juice.

Tsukishima stayed quiet, eyebrows still furrowed and the frown on his face tightening. He knew that made sense - one of the girls in their class was allergic to nuts and she always had to be careful what she ate, and he had even heard of some people not eating or drinking milk products because of allergies. The logical part of his brain agreed with Yamaguchi, perhaps staying away from Y/N was the only answer.

“Then... maybe it’s not an allergy,” Tsukishima mumbled quietly. He hated going back on his word but he couldn’t deny that he loathed the idea of not seeing Y/N’s smile ever again. Or seeing her sit with someone else. “Maybe it’s just something I have to get used to.”

“You know, Tsukishima,” Yamaguchi started again, looking off to the scenery that was in front of them. His voice was light and airy as he tried to coax his friend to the idea, “What you’re going through sounds a lot like-”

Tsukishima could hear it in his voice, he knew the next word forming from Yamaguchi’s lips before it even entered the air. He slammed his lunch box closed and stood up abruptly, turning away from the other boy’s eyes. “Lunch is over,” he grumbled, as if that was the reason he stood up so dramatically.

Yamaguchi smirked and packed up his things, shaking his head slowly when Tsukishima wasn’t looking. He wasn’t at all surprised that Tsukishima was having a hard time accepting his feelings.

The word hung in the very serious boy’s mind for the rest of the day. He tried not to focus so much on Y/N as he sat next to her for the rest of their classes, tried to not inhale too much or look in her general direction, in fear that his “allergy” would act up again.

He was almost positive it wasn’t... that. He would know for sure if it was, wouldn’t he? His nose scrunched slightly as he thought about the music he had listened to before, ones that had just a good melody and beat and he definitely didn’t listen to because of the lyrics since they were about... that thing.

Didn’t some people talk about their heart feeling like it was going to fall out of their chest? That they found it hard to breathe? That it was like all life stopped when they saw that person? And that despite all this, they never wanted to be without them?

Tsukishima had to get to the bottom of this. He was either experiencing some sort of allergic reaction to her or he was experiencing feelings. He thought about ignoring them, pretending like they didn’t exist so that maybe everything would go back to normal one day. But how long would that take? Wouldn’t it just be easier to rip off the bandaid and find out now?

At the end of class, Tsukishima zoomed his way out of class, not waiting for Yamaguchi like usual.

“Is he alright, Yamaguchi-san?” Y/N asked, surprised that the two best friends weren’t walking out together like they had every other day. Some days, they would even walk out with Y/N on their way to practice. But apparently, not today.

“He’s got a lot on his mind,” Yamaguchi explained, waving it away with a smile. Perhaps today he would be walking home by himself. And that was fine by him.

Y/N packed up her things and waved goodbye to her other classmates, heading out the door and slipping in her headphones. Her mind drifted to all the things she had to do when she got home, whether or not there were leftovers to heat up today or if she should cook something up.

“You take so long,” a drawl voice interrupted the very beginning of her first song. She blinked in surprise, looking to her right where Tsukishima was leaning against a tree.

Y/N pulled out one earbud, tilting her head as she watched him. It wasn’t like she hadn’t seen him do this casual, I-don’t-care-about-anything lean, with his headphones around his neck and his hands shoved in his pockets. But there was something different about him this time. Why was he avoiding her eyes? Why was he not giving her an annoyingly carefree smile? Why were his ears turning pink?

“Were you... waiting for me, Tsukishima-san?” Y/N asked slowly. He didn’t move for a moment, as if still calculating something in that big brain of his. He pushed off of the tree after sighing, walking over to her slowly.

“Obviously,” was all he said, glaring down at her as if she should’ve known this.

“You rushed out of class so quick, I thought you were already going home,” Y/N responded, still a bit confused. “Don’t you and Yamaguchi normally walk home together?”

Why did she have to question so much? Why couldn’t she just realize what he was trying to do? Tsukishima huffed and grabbed her hand, dropping a nice cool juice box in it. His eyes darted away from her next inquisitive look, but glanced back almost immediately because he wanted to see her eyes widen just a little at her favourite juice box.

“W-What is this?” Y/N asked, holding it in her hands. Part of her wanted to examine it to make sure he hadn’t somehow tricked her into holding something that wasn’t actually juice. She looked up at him suspiciously - Tsukishima knew her favourite juice?

“You didn’t have one with you today. I figured you forgot your wallet again today,” Tsukishima mumbled, shoving his hands in his jacket again.

“O-Oh. I did, thank you. Um,” Y/N hesitated. Was Tsukishima trying... to be nice? “Why... why did you buy it for me?”

“I just said why,” Tsukishima scoffed, flicking her head gently. He scolded himself internally, feeling guilty as soon as she showed the surprise on her face. She’s asking why you thought to be nice, Kei, stop being snarky, he told himself harshly. “Sorry,” he muttered quickly, feeling almost immediately bad for flicking her.

Y/N just laughed though, giggles spilling from her lips as she looked up at him, “Are you feeling okay, Tsukishima-san? You’re turning red,” she teased gently and he looked away from her quickly, hating how quickly his face heated up.

He took a breath, trying to mimic how calm he was on the court. He turned back to look at her with a cocky smile and confidence gaze, though he was sure she could tell he was nervous, “I’m fine, Y/N-san. But I need to tell you something. And I’m only going to say it once so listen up.”

Y/N watched him intently, noting the fake confidence he was trying to put on. She nodded as he looked at her for any sign to keep going.

His lips opened for a moment and Y/N could’ve sworn there was a moment of panic in his eyes when nothing came out. “I’m going to walk you home today,” Tsukishima stated finally, each word thudding into the air. He felt his confidence falter as the wrong words left his mouth, shifting his bag on his shoulder and starting to walk ahead.

Y/N’s eyebrows furrowed, feeling her confusion only rise. Did he really build up that whole thing... just to walk her home?

“Hurry up or I’ll leave you here,” Tsukishima called behind his shoulder, still walking ahead. He was internally punching himself, groaning and uttering insults at his own stupid self. Couldn’t even say it. Couldn’t just say Y/N I like you and I think I’m either allergic to you or I’m utterly in love with you but I’ve been told I suck at explaining how I feel and that I never say the right things at the right time so please just reject me so I can move away from these exhausting feelings.

“Want some?” Y/N’s gentle voice was suddenly beside him, and Tsukishima felt his stomach doing that flipping motion again. He glanced down at her and saw her holding up the juice box at him. “Seems only fair, since you bought it,” she explained, the glimmer in her eyes making him feel way too warm inside.

“Sure,” he mumbled after a moment. She smiled just a little bit wider, holding up the juice to him, expecting him to just snatch it away and drink. But no, Tsukishima being a little bitch and deciding that if he couldn’t admit anything with words, he could try with actions, leaned down slightly, and latched his lips onto the straw. His hand wrapped around hers over the juice box, holding it still as he took a sip.

Y/N felt like she was suddenly bright red, her heart possibly having exploded right then and there. His eyes looked up to meet hers as he sipped, smirking a bit as he noticed the panicked and flushed look in her eyes.

Maybe the feeling is... mutual?

“Mm,” he hummed, pulling away after keeping her gaze for a second. “I guess I can see why you like it.”

Y/N had shivers running up and down her spine, feeling like Tsukishima had looked into her very soul and knew about her year-long crush on him.

The two of them started walking a bit slower after that, and to the external eye, you’d probably just see two classmates walking home together. But look a little closer, and you’d see both of them having internal conflicts. They managed to walk through the small roads filled with shops and make it about halfway to Y/N’s house in complete silence. 

“Y/N-san,” Tsukishima finally ended it, the agonizing silence, in which he had been racking his brain trying to think of how to start a conversation. He stopped in his tracks as he spoke the one word, the two of them now on a quieter dirt path. There was no one to interrupt them, no one to save Tsukishima from embarrassment, no Yamaguchi to fill the awkward silence.

“Hm?” Y/N looked back at him, noticing him just standing there. “Are you alright, Tsukishima-san?”

“There’s something I need to say,” he started, his hands in his pockets clenched into fists.

“O-Oh okay.”

“I’ve been... feeling sick around you.” Baka, he scolded himself for what felt like the millionth time. That definitely wasn’t the way he had wanted to say it. “I-I mean, not like sick sick but like allergy sick,” he tried to recover, but scoffed at himself since that wasn’t all that much better.

Y/N’s eyebrows furrowed in response, trying to think about his reactions lately. He had definitely been more flushed lately, but she always thought that was annoyance. He’d been quieter and more distant, but it was Tsukishima after all. He looked over to her desperately, hoping to see that she was understanding what he was trying to say. She wasn’t. 

Tsukishima was starting to get frustrated. He knew he wasn’t the greatest at communicating but how hard was it to see how much he liked her? Yamaguchi saw it, hell, even his upperclassmen teased him about it when they first saw Tsukishima and Y/N walking out of class together one day. So why did other people who didn’t need to know it, why did they understand but she didn’t? Why was she so dense? 

You’re not saying anything, his mind reminded him as he scowled to himself.

“It has to be that,” Tsukishima finally continued quietly, his eyes now staring at his feet. He was practically trying to convince himself now. It had to be that there was a health related issue with him being around her. It had to be that, because if it wasn’t, it meant that Tsukishima had to tell her how he felt. And that meant that he was probably going to end up hurt. Why a girl like Y/N hung around a guy like him anyways was beyond him. 

“Why?” Y/N frowned, still terribly lost in the cosmos of this odd confession. “Why would it have to be that?”

“Because if it isn’t that, then it means that I’ve fallen completely head over heels for you.”

Tsukishima wasn’t sure how he had managed to say the words. But there it was. His fists tightened even more, his fingernails digging into his palm so hard it was starting to hurt. 

His eyes closed tightly, turning his head away from her. He didn’t want to look. He didn’t want to see laughter or disgust in her eyes. Maybe he could take it back now. Maybe he could-

Tsukishima jumped at the feeling of a poke on his chest, his eyes opening in surprise when he found Y/N standing much closer than she was earlier. “Are you teasing me?” She asked defensively, squinting her eyes up at him.

“T-Teasing?” Tsukishima stammered. He watched her eyes, noting how visibly upset she looked and he could feel his frustration rising. He had finally said what he had wanted to say this whole time... and she wasn’t even reacting the way she was supposed to. How stupid did she have to be? And why did she have to look so damn cute while doing it?

“Yamaguchi-san told you, didn’t he? I knew that poophead couldn’t keep his mouth shut,” she grumbled, crossing her arms against her chest. “He swore he wouldn’t tell you, but I should’ve known. You guys are best friends and all.”

“Told me... told me what?”

“That I’ve liked you practically since we met,” Y/N huffed, putting her hands on her hips. “Listen, Tsukishima-san, if you don’t like me back, you don’t have to tease me like this. I’m perfectly fine being rejected,” she told him with a pout on her lips (she was definitely not fine being rejected, and was planning on crying at home after this). “Don’t act like you didn’t know.”

Tsukishima‘s eyes widened, staring at her like she had grown a second head. “You... You like me?” He gulped. His allergies must be getting worse, his heart was thumping so hard against his chest, he couldn’t think straight.

Y/N and him shared a confused look for a moment, neither one of them sure who was teasing whom at this point. “Didn’t... didn’t you know? That’s why you’re being nice to me?” She asked him, poking his chest again. “Why else would you be walking me home and buying me juice?”

“Why would...” Tsukishima’s lips curled into a smile and suddenly he burst out into laughter, tilting his head back in amusement. 

“Why are you laughing?” Y/N whined, punching his arm lightly with a huff. “This isn’t a time to be laughing at me!”

Tsukishima straightened up with his signature cocky smile, shaking his head as he fixed his glasses on his face. Then, his hand moved to hit the top of her head.

“OW! Tsukishima-san!”

“You idiot. Why would I be standing here confessing to you if I was just going to make fun of you?” Tsukishima scoffed, smirking at her. “If I didn’t like you back and I found out you liked me, don’t you think I would’ve made it clear by now that you never stood a chance?”

Y/N thought about this for a moment, remembering that one time a girl in a different class had confessed to him after attending one of his matches.

“I think you’re incredible, Tsukishima-san! A-And I just.... well I just...”

“Are you trying to confess to me?” Tsukishima didn’t even bother looking up from his study book, finishing an equation before even glancing at her. “You should just give up now. I’m not interested.”

The girl had teared up so much, even Y/N had felt bad (even though she was secretly happy that Tsukishima hadn’t accepted the confession). Yamaguchi had yelled at Tsukishima about being gentle that day.

“Why would I be nice to someone stupid enough to think I’d like them? I didn’t give her any hints that I did, I don’t even know her,” Tsukishima grumbled.

Y/N had internalized those words, deciding she wouldn’t confess her feelings to Tsukishima ever. If she did, and Tsukishima rejected her, he probably wouldn’t want to be around her as friends ever again.

“So...” Y/N thought to herself for a moment, trying to reexamine what had happened today. “What was with the juice box then?” She asked him. 

“I thought...” Tsukishima frowned a little, looking up at the sky in thought. “I thought when you confess you were supposed to... give a gift or something.”

Y/N couldn’t help but giggle at his thought process and Tsukishima glared at her slightly. “You’re laughing at me now?”

She shook her head quickly, trying to stifle her giggles, “I just... I think it’s sweet,” she beamed, holding onto her little juice box even though it was empty now.

Tsukishima watched her carefully before smiling a little, patting her head gently, “Alright then, let’s get you home. I’ll bring another juice box for you for our date.”

“D-Date?” Y/N repeated shyly, following him as he started to walk again.

“You thought I’d just confess to you and not ask you out? Idiot,” Tsukishima smirked, feeling such an intense relief on his shoulders. His heart was still beating furiously and his stomach felt like it was going to come up his throat, but... it wasn’t as frustrating of a feeling now. 

After he dropped her off at her house with the promise of walking her to school tomorrow morning, Tsukishima couldn’t help but allow himself to smile widely the whole way home. 

If this is what an allergy felt like, he never wanted it to stop.

** ** ** ** ** ** ** **

Okay like I mentioned up there in the Author’s Notes, this is my first time writing for Haikyuu so lmk what you thought :) I’ve written some stuff for OHSHC and I think it’s pretty obviously that tall jerks with glasses are my type lol 

Anyways! Enjoy!

[luvdsc]

haha, what if we kissed? (lol jk... unless?)

fact! you’re secretly in love with your best friend, and so is he!

pairing :: zhong chenle x reader genre :: fluff / best friend, buzzfeed worth it au word count :: 5,072 words warnings :: none playlist :: sunny afternoon (red velvet) ⋆ about love (marina) ⋆ all about you (nct u) ⋆ love (x lovers) ⋆ bella notte (f. murray abraham & arturo castro) author’s note :: i literally just finished writing the rest of this in my meetings today and am posting during my lunchbreak, but happy (1 day late) birthday, chenle sweetheart!! ♡ ↳ part of the not clickbait series.

“Hello, and welcome back to another episode of Dream: Worth It!”

Chenle shouts loudly from the driver’s seat, waving excitedly at the camera attached to the dashboard as he waits for the traffic light to turn green. You visibly flinch in your spot on the passenger's side, startled by the sudden greeting, and even Jisung jumps in the backseat, almost dropping the camcorder he was fiddling with.

Your best friend continues to give the camera a dazzling smile, paying no attention to your and Jisung’s brief glares. “Today on Worth It, thanks to a fan’s suggestion, we’ll be trying out three different spaghetti dishes at three drastically different price points to find out which one is most worth it at its price!”

“Yes,” you chime in, nodding excitedly at the camera and giving a little wave. “So if you want to see another riveting episode of Chenle and Jisung going on three dates at three drastically different price points while I third wheel again, please stay tuned!”

“Hey!”

Both the boys wildly protest, but you blatantly ignore them, checking your phone quickly before beaming at the camera again. “So here’s our first spaghetti fact! The word ‘spaghetti’ is actually the plural version of spaghetto. Spaghetto comes from the Italian word spago, which means twine or thin string.”

“Wait, that actually makes sense. Spaghetti looks like thin strings,” Chenle says, eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

“Yeah, basically every language makes sense, except for English,” you remark, setting your phone down in your lap before turning to your best friend. “So are you excited for this episode’s dish?”

“Yes! Shout out to Moony for your suggestion,” Chenle calls out, driving forward before making a right. “If anyone else has any suggestions for future videos, please feel free to comment below.”

You start to explain the first restaurant to your viewers. “Our first stop is called Legalize Marinara! It’s a small hole in the wall place in downtown LA, and fresh pasta is made everyday. We’ll be talking to the owner and chef Johnny Suh about the daily process.”

“And cut!” Jisung calls out, and you stop there, pressing the off button to end the recording. Later on, the three of you will have to work on snipping up the recordings to create a smooth transition from there to a shot of Johnny and his restaurant before jumping into your quick interview with him.

You quickly scroll through the questions you had written ahead of time to ask Johnny on your phone, mouthing the words and memorizing them. You were always the one who asked about the history of the restaurant because Chenle wasn’t as good with the more sentimental questions and preferred the light hearted ones about the food specifically, which you didn’t mind. As long as you get to try good food at the end of it, you’re one very happy, very stuffed camper. You are very much looking forward to visiting Legalize Marinara.

“—and that’s how the pasta is freshly made everyday in the morning.” Johnny finishes up, giving the camera a very charismatic smile and a wink. “We also have a special brew of coffee created by my dad, but that’s a story for another episode. I’ll bring out the spaghetti once it’s ready.”

You and Chenle thank him before going over to sit at one of the small metal tables near the entrance. The place had a sort of modern, yet retro feel to it with an eclectic mix of vintage, kitschy furniture adding pops of color here and there to the otherwise simple space with a neutral palette. The name of the restaurant flashes as a neon sign, serving as the main wall decor along with records scattered here and there on the wall as well.

Jisung stands across from the two of you, propping the large camera on his shoulder in preparation. You and Chenle both take a sip of the special coffee drinks Johnny prepared for you each on the house, pleasantly surprised by the crisp, refreshing taste your taste buds are immediately hit with. Johnny appears minutes later, a pretty plate of simple spaghetti and meatballs along with some Parmesan and garnish on top in hand.

“Here’s our most popular dish: spaghetti with meatballs!” he announces, placing the plate in front of you both carefully. “It’s a simple tomato sauce, but it’s made with organic, local ingredients that we get from the farmer’s market every morning. We get the fresh meat from the butcher down the block everyday to make the meatballs and buy the cheese from local sellers as well. We also add the secret spice mixture created by my mom to the meatballs, which gives it a distinct flavor from other restaurants. Please dig in, guys!”

You immediately swirl your fork into the plate of spaghetti. It looks and smells absolutely fantastic, and your mouth is already watering. You cannot believe that this only costs thirteen dollars. This is an absolute steal. You are just about to take a bite when—

“Wait! We didn’t do a ‘cheers’ yet!” Chenle exclaims, sticking out his fork towards you. You clink your fork against his own metal utensil, and he’s finally satisfied, retracting his arm. Finally, you take the much anticipated bite. The flavors absolutely explode in your mouth, and you’re already reaching out to take a second forkful of the delicious masterpiece.

“This is amazing,” you declare, and Chenle nods enthusiastically, spearing a meatball with his fork. Jisung briefly pans the camera over to Johnny, who shows a double thumbs up before doing finger guns and giving an exaggerated wink.

“Here, try this.” Chenle cuts a piece of the meatball and offers it to you. You reach out for it, but he pulls back, smiling widely and eyes sparkling. “Nuh uh, that’s too easy. Say ah, Y/N.”

“I—” Your cheeks grow warmer than ever, and his grin grows broader, wriggling the fork in front of you. Face burning, you move forward and take a bite. You can hear Jisung fake gagging behind the camera and very much would like to flip him the bird, but you are a professional. You’ll get him back for that later. After all, revenge is a dish best served piping hot and spicy, and you have some Carolina reapers leftover from another video that may accidentally find its way into Jisung’s ramen next time.

You and Chenle spend some more time describing the dish in between bites as Johnny pipes in here and there with some well placed dad jokes that has Jisung shaking his head behind the camera. By the end of it, you both are very happy, and you switch places with Jisung who has a chance to try out the pasta himself at last. He silently eats it before tossing a thumbs up at the camera, and you stop the recording there. After thanking Johnny once more before the three of you leave, you all pile into your car and get ready to go to the next stop.

Up next: Penne for your Thoughts.

“Can we stop here?” Jisung pipes up, peering out the window with interest. His eyes scan the surroundings, peering at the empty space and the wide stairs in front of the spiraling columns of a grand building.

You furrow your eyebrows, glancing at your friend in the backseat. “We’re still a couple blocks away from the restaurant though.”

“This looks like a good spot to film a dance,” he muses to himself before sitting up straighter. “Can we take a quick break? We’re still early, and I wanted to film a quick TikTok before the sun sets.”

You look over at Chenle, who shrugs and pulls over. He backs up into an available parking space, parallel parking smoothly, one hand gripping the back of your seat and the other on the steering wheel. “Alright, do your thing, Jisungie.”

Jisung excitedly hops out from the back. You and Chenle follow suit, locking the car behind you. Your friend is busy setting up his collapsible tripod before placing his phone on it and calling over to you, “Hey, can you stand in front, Y/N? I wanna angle this correctly and check the lighting.”

You move in front of his phone, standing several steps in front of the stairs. Jisung fiddles around with his phone for a few moments, switching up some of the settings and zoom functions before straightening up, eyes bright. “Okay, stay there to mark the spot! I’m gonna press the start button to record. Chenle, can I borrow your phone? I need to play the song for the dance.”

Chenle hands him his phone, and the familiar intro to Doja Cat’s “Say So” begins to blast on top volume. Jisung hands it back to its owner and hurriedly moves to stand in front of his own recording phone as you step aside. “I kinda also need you two in my TikTok.”

“Wait, what? I don’t know the dance,” you protest, starting to back out, but Jisung grabs your hand, pulling you into view, as Chenle bounces over with a shrug of his shoulders, never one to shy away from the camera.

“You don’t need to dance. I just need you both to uh, kiss my cheek on, um, both sides when I tap on them both. It should be the fourth time she says ‘say so’ in the song,” he stammers slightly, face turning slightly pink. He avoids making eye contact as you give him a suspicious look, crossing your arms over your chest.

“What? Why?”

“It’s part of the dance! Now get out of the shot please because the chorus is finally coming up again!” He unceremoniously shoves you out of the frame, and Chenle quickly catches you before you faceplant into the ground. You have a few choice words to yell at your friend and are about to furiously march over to him, but Chenle tightens his grip on you. “Let’s just let him finish, and we can go on. You know how he is about dancing.”

“I’m paying Renjun to put another cockroach picture as his lockscreen again,” you huff, frowning at the dancing boy. “Why didn’t you say anything about the whole kissing request anyway?”

“Eh, I’ve done it before. It’s no big deal.” Chenle shrugs, and you start to stutter, brain malfunctioning, “Wait, you did wha—”

“Oh, it’s almost our cue!” Chenle pushes you towards Jisung as he runs behind the camera to the other side, and you find yourself stumbling for a second time before catching yourself. Grumbling to yourself, you catch Chenle’s apologetic expression, and you sigh, shaking your head as you wait on the sidelines for Jisung to do the move.

And there it is.

Jisung points at his cheeks, tapping them on both sides, and you and Chenle jump into the frame. You lean forward, pressing your lips softly against— wait.

Eyes widening, you jump back in shock, mouth popping open, and the same reaction comes from your best friend when you two realize that you just kissed each other. On the lips.

Crouched on the ground, Jisung looks rather smug after quickly dropping down mid-dance and orchestrating the whole incident. He quickly stands up, striding towards the camera and ending the recording, before efficiently packing up the equipment and walking back to the car without another word.

“Did we just—” you splutter, unable to continue your sentence, as your face grows increasingly warm. Chenle refuses to make eye contact with you, the darkening blush spreading across his face like wildfire. The two of you both direct your disbelief at the same target, rushing over to the car which he boredly stands next to, waiting for Chenle to unlock it.

“Jisung!” You both shout his name, and he just stares at you both, a small grin across his face that he struggles to hide. “What?”

“‘What?’ That’s it? What was that?! Why did you do that?” you exclaim, waving your arms around. Chenle is rendered speechless, unable to say anything after the quick outburst of his other best friend’s name.

“I was tired of listening to Che—mmph!” Jisung is abruptly cut off as Chenle throws his hand over his friend’s mouth, effectively interrupting whatever he was about to say. The two of them silently look at each other, maintaining some sort of telepathic stare that’s probably discussed in the universal book of the bro code. You’ve seen Jaemin and Jeno or Renjun and Donghyuck share the same look before and never really understood it. To be honest, it kind of reminds you of that one moment where the main characters of a chick flick gaze into each others’ eyes and then kiss.

The sound of a text notification cuts off your train of thought and breaks the intense stare down going between the two boys, and you check your phone, eyes widening. “Oh my god, we’re going to be late if we don’t go now! Taeyong just texted me to confirm if we’re coming.”

The three of you hurry into the car, buckling up in your seats. Your hand lightly grazes Chenle’s amidst the rush, and you freeze. You look up, heat spreading across your face, as Chenle meets your gaze, turning redder than spaghetti sauce.

“Alright, you can continue this moment at the restaurant,” Jisung says loudly, jolting the two of you out of your stupor. You quickly retract your hand, mumbling a quick apology, and look away, cheeks still growing warmer than ever. Chenle awkwardly clears his throat and starts the car up, driving to your second stop on the map.

Penne for your Thoughts is simply lovely. It reminds you of a place you would see on the shiny cover of Architecture Digest: a hot spot where all those social influencers would take aesthetic snapshots and post to their Instagrams. The restaurant is quaint and spacious: a large area filled with lots of greenery, hanging plants in simple white ceramic pots, white painted brick walls, and wooden tables with soft cushions on each seat. Once you wrap up the interview with Taeyong, you are seated next to an open window with a great view of a pretty koi pond in the back.

“We serve Korean fusion style food here, and our spaghetti has a freshly made tomato sauce that includes chopped kimchi infused in it. We found that using garlic marinated pork belly makes a more flavorful meatball, which we char slightly, paying homage to the wonderful KBBQ samgyeopsal. We also found that a raw egg yolk on top adds a richness to the pasta, which is similar to a bowl of bibimbap. And there’s some grated Parmesan and mozzarella on top.” Taeyong sets the plate of gorgeous spaghetti in front of you and Chenle with a shy smile. “I hope you both enjoy it.”

You don’t know how else to describe the dish, except that it is beautiful (Just like the restaurant owner, like have you seen his face? Lee Taeyong is the true modern day Adonis, but you digress). You swear you saw Chenle wipe a tear from his face out of the corner of your eye. Practically salivating, you impatiently wait for Jisung to take a few close up videos and pictures of the dish before you immediately dig in.

Fork awkwardly hovering in the air, you pause, turning to Chenle. “Uh, cheers?”

His own loaded fork is halfway to his mouth when he halts. “Oh! Right. Yes. Um, cheers, Y/N.”

The two of you stiffly tap your forks against each other before facing forward again and finally taking the much desired bite. The flavors are bursting like fireworks, and if someone told you that you had died and gone to heaven, you would believe them because there’s no other word to explain the taste other than heavenly. Dante had many circles leading to the center of hell. If you are to apply the same concept to heaven, Legalize Marinara would be the first circle you enter once you go past the pearly gates, and Penne for your Thoughts would most definitely be the second.

The clinking of Chenle’s fork against the plate breaks you from your thoughts, and your good mood falters when you remember the incident again. You plaster a quick smile as you begin to describe the dish to the camera. Chenle chimes in with a wide smile of his own that looks a little too forced, but the only one who seems to notice is you.

Once the recording is wrapped up, Chenle drops you off at your apartment building for you to change into a more dressier attire for the last stop. He and Jisung will change at their place before coming back to pick you up for dinner.

Up next: Terrazza San Valentino.

The place is positively breathtaking. It is an upscale restaurant with open seating on a terrace, leading to a beautiful view of the ocean. Wisteria vines and bright flowers weave their way through the twisting low iron fences encompassing the space as they climb the sides of the building. You have the perfect seat to witness the picturesque sunset over the rippling waters. A bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon had been brought out and now rests on the covered table, uncorked and already poured out into two glasses. It very much reminds you of the beautiful restaurants you visited along the Amalfi Coast, specifically Il Capitano in Positano. You only hope that the food here will be just as amazing as the pasta you ordered there.

You just wish your company was a little better. The atmosphere felt more awkward than the time your mom had set you up on a blind date with her coworker’s son. You had to text Chenle for help that time, and he came to your rescue, helping you escape after pretending to be your long lost son. Obviously, your date wasn’t dumb enough to believe that, but he did believe that you were completely off your rockers and immediately took off after that.

Sneaking a glance at your best friend, you sigh when you realize that he refuses to look your way. You carefully tuck the skirt of your wine red dress under your crossed legs. The sweetheart neckline emphasizes the simple gold necklace you have on, and the dress tapers off at your waist, accentuating your figure perfectly. You paired the outfit with a matching lipstick, a simple black clutch, and some elegant black heels with ribbons that loop around your ankles into a pretty bow.

In other words, you look stunning, and Chenle’s palms are growing sweaty. He undos the first few buttons of his white dress shirt, desperately wanting to take off his tailored suit jacket, but his attire would look much too casual without it. He avoids eye contact with you and remains silent, growing even more flustered by the second, and looks at Jisung helplessly.

Of course, his other best friend proves to be useless again (Disappointing, but not surprising). Jisung simply wriggles his eyebrows at him, eyes darting from you to Chenle, before zooming into his face at a very unflattering angle. Chenle throws him a dirty look, and Jisung merely sticks out his tongue in response. However, they immediately smoothen their expressions into much more pleasant ones when Jaehyun comes out with the plate of food on a small cart.

“This is our play on spaghetti.” He gives you a dimpled smile, and you briefly wonder if the customers rave about this restaurant because of the food or the chef. Perhaps it is a combination of both.

He continued to explain the dish, setting it down in front of you and Chenle. “We use strangozzi that is made fresh every morning. We infuse sun dried tomatoes that we dried ourselves into the olive oil for a minimum of thirty days. The pasta is cooked for sixty seconds, while we slightly sauté grated truffle in the oil in a pan. Once the pasta is ready, we transfer it to the truffle pan and cook it for another minute, making sure to coat the pasta in the sauce. And then we grate some Parmesan and truffles right on top at the table.”

Jaehyun pulls out the expensive mushroom, generously grating thin slices on top of the glistening strands of pasta. The smell is incredible, and your eyes are already hyper fixated on the dish in front of you. He puts down the mushroom and grater, picking up the second grater and the cheese from the cart before shredding the cheese perfectly.

When he finishes, Jaehyun places them back on the cart and smiles at you both charmingly once more. “I hope you enjoy your meal. If you need anything else, please feel free to ask.”

You thank him before he leaves, and Jisung takes all the necessary shots before giving the okay to start eating. You and Chenle offer up some comments about the elegance of the dish, describing its appearance and finally twirling some on the end of your fork. You murmur a quiet “cheers” as the two of you clink your glasses of wine together and take a sip before having the first bite.

The amount of money you have to pay to have a truffle dish is absolutely worth it. The taste is simply indescribable, and you truly have no words. You are blown away by the amount of flavor that can be created with just a few ingredients, and your taste buds are singing. Wide eyed, you turn to look at Chenle, who has the same astonished expression on his face, already staring back at you in complete surprise.

“Holy shit,” you breathe out, and your best friend agrees with you. “Holy shit indeed.”

You immediately go for another bite, and Chenle quickly follows suit. “This is— this is incredible. I don’t know how to describe it, except, except, wow. I can’t stop eating it, and the sun dried tomatoes, olive oil, fresh pasta al dente, and truffles just work so well together. It’s like a symphony in my mouth.”

“I agree,” Chenle nods enthusiastically, swiping another forkful of the yummy goodness. “This has to be one of the best dishes of the entire season.”

“Yeah, absolutely.” You spear a slice of the truffle with the pasta, and the ensuing bite is simply perfect and delectable. “I would come back here every single week if my bank account would let me.”

The stifled atmosphere between the two of you suddenly becomes relaxed at that point, the thick tension dissipating with food never failing to act as the perfect ice breaker and buffer simultaneously. For now, you can pretend the kiss didn’t happen and almost forget it (key word: almost).

“There’s a very popular fan suggestion,” Jisung pipes up, looking at the comment section of the previous video where you and Chenle announced your current recording’s star dish. “It got over twenty thousand likes and five hundred responses.”

“What is it?” You pause in eating, fork poised in the air, as you look over to your friend behind the camera. Chenle pays no attention, continuing to take another bite.

“Recreate the Lady and the Tramp moment.”

Your jaw drops, and your eyes grow round. Practically scandalized, your voice goes an octave higher. “You mean the kissing scene?!”

At the mention of kissing, Chenle chokes on a noodle, spluttering and nearly hacking up a lung, and you quickly reach over and firmly pat him on the back repeatedly until he stops coughing with a weak “thanks.”

“What? This is a food show! Why do they want us to kiss?” your best friend wheezes, and you pass him a glass of water. He grabs it from your outstretched hand gratefully and takes a large gulp.

“I don’t know, fan service? Anyway, it’s good for the views!” Jisung gives you a thumbs up, and you frown at him, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Why don’t you do it with Chenle then?”

“It specifically says you and Chenle,” he informs smugly with a smirk, and you glower at him, much to his amusement.

“Well, if it’s for the fans…” Chenle trails off, a faint blush beginning to make its appearance on his face. He hesitantly pulls out one strand of the pasta, picking up one end on his fork.

You can’t believe this. Yet, you slowly reach out for the other end of the strand with your fork, twirling it onto the metal prongs securely. You move to take your end of the noodle, while Chenle does the same, both of you actively avoiding eye contact.

“Oh c’mon, at least make it a little more romantic than that. Jeno and Jaemin have more chemistry than you two right now,” Jisung complains, and you would very much like to chuck the half full bottle of wine at his big, annoying head (Chenle also has similar thoughts).

Taking a deep breath, you finally place the noodle’s end in your mouth. Cheeks burning, you can feel your heart rate already skyrocketing at the mere thought of kissing your best friend again. You know you’ll freeze up if you look at him, so you do your best to focus your gaze on the center of the noodle strand. You’ll have some time before the two of you meet in the middle, right?

Wrong.

It comes much too soon, and your palms are growing sweaty as your heart races in your chest at a breakneck speed. Your lips are mere millimeters away from his, and you pause. You can’t hear anything, but the pounding of your heart and the blood rushing to your cheeks, and you finally find the courage to peek up at your best friend. You find him already gazing at you, a soft expression on his face. His eyes dart down to your lips before meeting your eyes once more, and you suddenly realize that he’s waiting for you, that he won’t do anything unless you want it too, that it’s okay if you don’t.

But you do.

So you muster up all the courage you possibly can and close the distance, carefully pressing your lips against his for a tender kiss before biting off the noodle. When you pull back, you finally notice the awestruck expression written all over Chenle’s face. He lets out a small laugh of disbelief before he positively beams, bouncing in his seat, and you sport a matching smile, albeit a little bashful.

“Uh, anyway, who left that comment? We should probably give them a mention,” you say, clearing your throat and hoping the heat subsides in your cheeks soon. Chenle continues to grin like the Cheshire Cat and secretly grabs your hand underneath the tablecloth, intertwining your fingers with his. You can feel your face exponentially growing warm once again, but you still send a pleased smile to your best friend.

“Uh…” Jisung awkwardly laughs, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “‘Insert goofy’s chuckle.’”

At Jisung’s answer, you freeze up entirely in your position before immediately turning and locking eyes with Chenle in complete horror, the both of you instantly coming to the same, dreadful realization.

“HYUCK?!”

One new notification: Dream: Worth It uploaded a new video!

insert goofy’s chuckle commented:

oh my god you guys actually did it. your relationship started all thanks to ME 🙆🏻 you’re welcome btw 😘 I take payment in the form of your first born’s name

notanimpasta replied: @ insert goofy’s chuckle ok calm down rumpelstiltskin

jisung pwark replied:  @ notanimpasta what a perfect nickname for him. He’s an ugly little greedy man

ghosts are real so suck it hyuck replied: @ jisung pwark LMAOOOO (and congrats, chenle and y/n!)

 insert goofy’s chuckle replied:  @ jisung pwark what tf no one asked??? 

notanimpasta replied: @ jisung pwark wait hold on you were supposed to edit that end part out????

jisung pwark replied: @ notanimpasta i left it for the views ☺️

big head king replied: @ jisung pwark people watch for the food tho!!! 🙂

nana ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ♡‧₊˚ replied: @ big head king I watched it for the kiss. Love is so beautiful 🥰💓💞🥺🥺💕💛💟✨💖

jenojam replied: @ big head king I had watched it for the food! but congratulations, y/n and chenle :) 

insert goofy’s chuckle replied: @ big head king i watched it because ron jeon said you mentioned me

ghosts are real so suck it hyuck replied: @ insert goofy’s chuckle IT’S RENJUN!!!!!! 🤬🤬 

mork lee rawr xD replied: hahaha I watch for the food~

insert goofy’s chuckle replied: @ mork lee rawr xD Thank you Mark, very cool!

winwin in past tense is wonwon!!! commented:

whoop whoop congrats lele 🥳🥳

rapperpunzel commented:

the pasta looks good 🍝

johnny’s communication center commented:

Thanks for stopping by! Come back for the couple’s special discount anytime 😉

baa baa yang sheep commented:

oh my god finally!!!

ghosts are real so suck it hyuck replied: @ baa baa yang sheep you owe me $50 I was right, it happened before the season finale

baa baa yang sheep replied: @ ghosts are real so suck it hyuck suddenly i’m jared, 19

xiao dejasmine commented:

hahahaha cute ! 😁😁

ty track commented:

Thank you y/n and chenle for visiting ~~ congrats on your relationship !!! -TY

junguwu (◕‿◕✿) commented:

YAAAAAS CHENLE SWEETIE 😘😘😘

jisung pwark commented:

check out my latest tiktok video @ jisungpwark to see their actual first kiss!!! and don’t forget to like, comment, and subscribe ☺️

notanimpasta replied: @ jisung pwark STOP USING US AS CLICKBAIT

jisung pwark replied: @ notanimpasta no ❤️

jisung pwark replied: @ notanimpasta also red is sus

big head king replied: @ jisung pwark so when are you gonna do the best friend kissing challenge huh 👀

jisung pwark replied: @ big head king SHUT UP CHENLE

honeyfairy replied: @ jisung pwark 😳😳

gu ren gui god commented:

wow~ very cute, chenle! my angel 😊

FIGHTING HAEYADWAE commented:

YOOOOO CONGRATS, MAN 🤩🤪🤪

prince jae commented:

thank you guys for coming by! please stop by next year on your anniversary free of charge (:

insert goofy’s chuckle replied: @ prince jae omg mark and I will be there for sure ❤️

showmethemonet replied: @ insert goofy’s chuckle my new boyfriend and I will be there too ☺️

insert goofy’s chuckle replied: @ showmethemonet I’m sorry, I was wrong, pls don’t leave me for bts jin even though i am so much more handsomer and talented than him 😌

apado gwenchana god commented:

nice 😎👍🏻

[emeren]

zoom call- eren jaeger

pairing: eren jaeger x fem!reader 

word count: 1.7k

content warnings: smut, 18+, very slight degradation, voyeurism if you squint (not really though)

notes: i wrote this a couple months back before that video went viral on tik tok, but it was the only completed draft i had, so here we go! very rushed but hope you enjoy :) (also my first time writing smut lol) 

SUMMARY: eren is a little shit when it comes to letting you focus on your zoom classes, especially when you make it obvious you’re trying to ignore him

you lazily rubbed your eyes in response to the bright computer screen. the eight thirty lecture time was starting to wear down on your motivation. you sat, half asleep in front of your laptop, gaze drearily focused on the professor’s face. 

school had become utterly disengaging; hours spent scrolling through your phone and blatantly ignoring your professors. you briefly wondered if class was really worth it at all anymore. 

as your professor began to delve into their lecture on calculus, you could hear your boyfriend in the other room as he began to stir awake. you felt pretty bad, in all honesty. for as long as you’d known eren, he’d made it obvious that he loved nothing more than to sleep in. no matter how quiet you tried to be, it seemed like you woke him up earlier than he wanted every single morning. 

you cringed as you heard the bedroom door creak open, followed by the sound of his muffled footsteps. 

double checking that your mic and camera were indeed off, you turned to see your boyfriend standing sleepily in the doorway. his hair was down and messy; body only adorning a pair of grey sweatpants that sat tantalizingly low on his hips. his teal eyes were squinted with a tired annoyance. 

“sorry, did i wake you up again?” you whispered, despite the fact that no one on the zoom call could hear you. eren’s face creased into a frown at the question. 

“yeah, but s’alright,” he responded, voice thick with slumber. you offered an apologetic smile before turning back to your lecture. eren quietly left the room as you resulted to writing down some half-hearted notes, your brain absently drifting towards your plans for the weekend. 

about ten minutes had passed when you felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around your shoulders, eren’s lips meeting your cheek in a morning greeting. 

his minty breath fanned across your face; you could see that he’d pulled his hair back into a messy knot from his reflection on the computer screen. though his warm gesture made your stomach erupt in butterflies, you were determined to pay attention to the class in front of you. eren took notice. 

“trying to stay focused, hm?” he mumbled as his mouth began to trail down to your neck, peppering the skin with light kisses. you groaned in slight annoyance, attempting to push him away.

“i need to take notes, eren,” you reprimanded. eren didn’t seem so easily swayed, however. 

his mouth found its way back to your neck, beginning to gently suck on the soft skin. you felt your face warm up at the sensation, an all too familiar ache between your legs. curse your boyfriend for being so goddamn horny all the time. 

“go ahead, m’not stopping you,” eren whispered hotly against the skin. you bit your lip as you tried to remain focused on whatever your teacher was talking about, but the words were going in one ear and out the other.

his warm lips began to shift down towards your collarbone and the place where your shirt interrupted the flow of bare, kissable flesh. 

eren’s large hand ran smoothly over the expanse of your right arm before coming up to cup your breast and giving it a generous squeeze. his nimble fingers pinched at your nipple through the fabric of your shirt, causing you to emit a low moan. your eyes snapped to his face in embarrassment over the noise.

eren had a smug look on his face, like he had just won some unspoken argument, the little shit. you glared up at him as he stood to his full height, teal eyes glancing to the computer screen as he momentarily considered something. 

“your camera is off, right?” he asked huskily. you swallowed before nodding. his question could only confirm what you already suspected he was going to do. 

placing either hand on the arm rests of the chair, eren leaned leaned over your body and glowered down at you. “good. can’t have anyone else seeing you the way i do, can we?” 

eren’s possessiveness sent a warm feeling down your spine. the thought of being his and his alone was enough to have you on your knees. you burned with anticipation as he feverishly brought his mouth down to meet yours. 

the kiss was heated and wet, his tongue lapping at your lips as it slipped into your mouth. you sighed contentedly at the sensation. acting on a sudden impulse, you wrapped your lips delicately around his tongue and began to suck gently on the exposed muscle, eliciting a loud groan from eren’s throat. as you pulled away, you saw his dilated pupils snap to the string of saliva connecting your lips. 

“take your shirt off,” you did as you were told, pulling the fabric from your body. eren’s eyes quickly scanned the expanse of your chest; his hungry stare causing the spot between your legs to throb. he dropped to his knees before you, making sure to maintain eye contact as he slowly brought his head to your chest, mouth desperately latching onto your breast. 

his tongue swirled around your hardened nipple, a small whimper clawing its way up your throat. you leaned your head back as you felt eren’s lips curl into a smirk at the sound. his teeth carefully grazed the nub before he pulled back; face slightly flushed and still so very smug.  

his large hands slowly lifted to the hemline of your sweatpants, cold fingertips grazing your hipbone. he looked up to you as he hooked his fingers under the waistline whilst jutting his chin upwards. “up, baby.” 

you lifted yourself briefly from the chair as he pulled your sweatpants down, allowing them to pool around your ankles. as you went to sit back down, you caught your reflection in the computer screen, wincing. it felt unbelievable that you were completely exposed while your zoom class continued in the background. you felt a wave of embarrassment wash over your body and had half a mind to tell eren to stop. 

the moment of doubt passed breathlessly as eren’s awfully cold and awfully long middle and ring fingers pushed past your underwear and teased at your entrance. your lack of attention must’ve been apparent; eren’s free hand coming up to roughly grip your chin, forcing you to look down at him. 

“pay attention, pretty girl,” he growled, teal eyes glinting seriously. his fingers teasingly swiped up to your clit, collecting your slick as they travelled upwards. you sucked in a breath as he brought the digits back down, circling around your cunt before slowly pumping inside. 

you meekly nodded your head, unable to form a coherent sentence as he curled his fingers upwards, hitting the warm spongey spot that made your toes curl. your body began to heat up, watching eren’s beautiful face as he fucked you with his fingers. his chin was turned slightly upward, lips parted. his digits slid in and out of you, picking up speed as a soft moan left your lips. 

“such a wet little bitch,” eren hissed as he shifted to gain more leverage. the pressure in your core began to build, only amplified by the addition of his thumb on your sensitive clit. “fuck, you’re so hot like this. should we show the class your pretty little cunt, hm?”

you closed your eyes as the warmth started to spread from between your legs into your stomach, release on its way. his fingers began to slow, a whine bubbling up from your throat.

“eren..” you whimpered, watching a scowl form on his face. his fingers pulled out completely from inside of you, the lack of contact making you ache in need. 

still gripping your jaw, he forced you to watch as he placed his long fingers between his lips, slowly sucking the remnants of you from himself. you bit your lip to repress a moan at the slight of his tongue gliding over his knuckles. he was hot and he knew it. 

he leaned forward, pulling your face down as he stood. his grip on your jaw tightened, forcing your mouth to pop open. he spat directly in your mouth, the warm liquid pooling on your tongue as he stared down at you.

“swallow,” he demanded, waiting as you let the bitter yet saccharine liquid slide down your throat. pleased, he released his grip on your jaw, a slight stinging where his fingers had rested. “good girl.”

his hands came up to the hemline of his sweatpants, gingerly yanking them down along with his boxers. you felt heat rush to your face as his cock came up to slap against his stomach. 

“can you stand up for me, pretty?” you nodded, eyes wide as his hand came down to lazily pump his dick. standing, you stepped out of your sweatpants and pulled your panties down, kicking them both to the side. 

eren’s eyes glanced to your laptop once more, pushing it as far back on the wooden desk as it would go. before you had the chance to question his motives, he roughly gripped your hips and spun you around, pressing you down onto the table. the cool surface made you shiver. 

his hand grabbed a fistful of your hair, forcing your neck to crane uncomfortably backwards. you could feel him positioning the tip of his cock at your entrance, the throbbing desire in you preparing itself to be stretched. he hesitated, staring at you darkly.

“beg for it,” eren’s voice was laced with a deep desire, eyes clouded with lust. you looked back at him through your lashes, lips slightly parted as his chest heaved. he could tell you were trying to rile him up. he yanked your hair slightly in retaliation. “beg for my cock to fuck you, baby.” 

“please,” you mewled, the aching in your cunt all to aware of him at your entrance, teasing you. eren raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed. you swallowed deeply, the sound amplified by the strain of your craned neck. “please fuck me. fuck me so hard, eren.” 

a smirk danced across his features before he slowly stuffed himself inside of you, stretching and embedding within you. you hissed out in discomfort, never really getting accustomed to the sheer size of him. the slight pain started to dissipate as leaned forward while pulling your head back further by your hair. his hot breath fanned across the shell of your ear. 

“if you’re loud enough, i’ll let you cum,” with that, he dropped your hair and began to roughly buck his hips forward, the full feeling making your stomach burn. you moaned loudly as he slammed into you, picking up pace and stretching you nice and good.

his grunts were low and primal, melding with the sound of his hips smacking into your ass, hands burning prints into the skin on your waist. you felt yourself clench around his dick as he thrusted particularly deep, hitting that sweet spot that made tears prick your eyes. 

“you’re so pretty for me,” he grunted breathlessly. his pounding began to speed up, the sensation beginning to curdle in your cervix as you let out a string of curse words. eren fisted your hair again, the follicles stinging angrily as he brought his other hand forward to stuff his first two fingers in your mouth. 

the skin was warm and salty as you desperately sucked on his knuckles, frantic for the release you were craving as he abused your cunt. he pressed his fingers down on your tongue, allowing your mouth to fill with hot saliva. he groaned loudly at the sensation, his hips beginning to buck more senselessly. 

“pretty, pretty girl,” he moaned out, fingers pulling from your lips and bringing the saliva down your chin. you could feel your release fast approaching, aided by eren’s deep, purposeful thrusts that had you seeing stars. 

with one final plunge of his cock deep within your cunt, the release of dopamine crashed over your body, eren twitching as you unraveled around him. with a couple more sloppy thrusts, he was filling you up all nice with his cum, throaty groans ripping from his chest. 

the two of you sat in a breathy silence, cooling down from your highs together. eren pulled out, smiling lightly at the sight of his seed dripping from between your legs. he leaned forward, placing a kiss on your forehead. 

“better catch up on your notes, babe.” 

<3 <3 <3

[bokutsumie]

HAIKYUU BOYS TAKING THEIR BOYFRIEND ICE SKATING

-> kageyama, oikawa, akaashi

-> male reader

-> request: ( @kagetodo ) « could i get headcanons of what would happen if kageyama, oikawa, and akaashi took their [male] s/o ice-skating? if not that's cool, i really like your writing style btw »

-> hi bb! i love this request so much help?? i absolutely love ice skating ive been doing it for years it's so fun and painful. and i'm happy u like my writing style :>

## TOBIO KAGEYAMA !!

you asked him first because you thought it would be rly fun!

cough bad idea cough

you knew how to skate

,,,he has absolutely never skated a day in his life

once you finish tying his skates for him he would definitely complain about how tight they were

"babe they're supposed to be like that"

"why?? i cant feel my feet can you just loosen them please???"

*sigh* "you know what, sure! have fun breaking your ankles"

"nvm lol"

this bitch refuses to ask for help

"babe look i'm doing it!"

he is running in place and holding on to the side of the rink for dear life

",,, good job!"

when he isn't refusing help, yall r holding hands <3

you probably have to leave not even 30 minutes in because he fell and slammed his face on the side of the rink (yes this is from personal experience, don't naruto run and skate kids)

he looks like the header LMAO

## TOORU OIKAWA !!

cocky bastard as per usual

used to skate all the time when he was a kid so he has a lot of experience

he is ZOOMING around the rink while you are taking your time

"hey look at me! babe! i'm good right?"

after you nod your head with a light smile he feels bad so he slides over to you and hugs you

you both fall but he doesn't care

he's laying on top of you and refuses to get off

everyone else in the rink: 🧍🏼

holds your waist if he's helping you try to skate backwards

will push you as a joke but actually feels really bad when you fall HAHSJB

absolutely adores how red your cheeks and nose get because of the cold

100% wraps his scarf around you

definitely takes you to a little cafe afterwards !

## AKAASHI KEIJI !!

basic skating experience

absolutely helps you if you need it

constantly holding your hand to guide you even if you know what you're doing

if you lose your gloves or don't have any he holds your hands and puts them in his pockets

hot chocolate from the snack shack is a requirement before you even put your skates on

skates backwards facing you while you're skating forwards because he wants to be face to face w you

if he notices your nose is red he will boop it .

cheeks look hold, his hands are holding your face immediately .

i think he rly likes to do little spins- nothing big just a little spin while he's skating along with you

wears one of those winter hats but it's the one with the pompom on the top and he braids on the sides

warm cuddles on the bench if you're cold :)

tags: @we-mentally-unstable @ees420

[tickly-trashcan]

Round After Round {AkaIwaOi}

A/N: i am realizing only after I wrote this how similar it is to another one of my fics,,, whoopsie, lol. I still hope you enjoy this one, I’ve been wanting to write Akaashi for so long and getting to write this really scratched that itch in my brain hehe.

Summary: Oikawa, Iwaizumi and Akaashi are playing video games together. When Akaashi proves to be rather good at them, how will Oikawa and Iwaizumi finally get their victory?

Word Count: 1.5k (under the cut)

Oikawa, Iwaizumi and Akaashi were all spending the night at Oikawa’s house that night. Oikawa had proposed a video game tournament, something he assumed he would win due to Akaashi almost never playing video games and Iwaizumi having almost never beaten Oikawa in anything. Oikawa had cockily handed the controllers to his friends, sitting on the end of the couch with Akaashi in the middle, looking at the controller almost confused.

“So I just press this button to steer?”

“No, you use this to steer,” Oikawa corrected, his cockiness only growing in thinking that he was going to win.

He started the race, the little traffic light counting down to when the race would begin, Oikawa glancing over at Iwaizumi and Akaashi, both of whom looked as if they had already accepted the fact that they would lose.

The race started and they took off, Iwaizumi surprisingly taking first place right off the bat. He laughed, pumping his fist in the air and immediately regretting it when he fell to third place, Oikawa and Akaashi pulling ahead of him.

“You’re not bad at this, Akaashi~” Oikawa said, a slight lilt in his voice as he spoke. Akaashi shrugged, continuing to stare at the screen as his fingers moved nimbly across the controller. Iwaizumi suddenly laughed, and Oikawa looked over at Iwaizumi’s screen, noticing that he had a blue shell.

“Don’t you dare! No no no, not the blue shell!!” Oikawa wailed, falling out of first place as his character got hit by the infamous blue shell, Akaashi’s kart speeding ahead of him and reclaiming the first spot.

“Why’d you do that??” Oikawa whined, glaring at Iwaizumi, who only laughed, pulling ahead of Oikawa into second place, Akaashi still in first. Oikawa pouted, he needed to get ahead of his friends and beat them, his pride was on the line!

He managed to pick up a red shell and knock out Iwaizumi, who groaned in frustration. He tried to swerve around Akaashi, speeding up a little bit, but Akaashi quickly veered over, keeping him from getting past.

The race eventually ended, and Akaashi took first place. Oikawa and Iwaizumi groaned in frustration, but Akaashi didn’t seem to exhibit too much emotion.

“Wanna go again?” He offered, and Oikawa immediately perked up along with Iwaizumi, Oikawa already starting the next race.

“We’ll definitely beat you this time!” He said, and Akaashi nodded, holding up his controller as Oikawa started the second race. It went just about the same as the last one, with Akaashi taking first place calmly as Oikawa and Iwaizumi groaned in frustration.

“How are you so good at this??” Iwaizumi asked, nudging Akaashi, who jumped at the sudden touch. He shrugged, showing that he didn’t really know as Iwaizumi grumbled in annoyance.

“One more time!” Oikawa exclaimed, and Iwaizumi and Akaashi nodded. He started the next race, Oikawa taking the lead this time, Akaashi hot on his tail. Iwaizumi somehow kept getting hit by banana peels, so he wasn’t doing too great on keeping up with the other two.

They were on the final lap, Oikawa still in the lead as he huffed cockily, nudging Akaashi. He didn’t look away from the television as Oikawa spoke.

“Looks like I’m gonna win this time!”

“Red shell,” Akaashi said flatly, pressing a button as Oikawa raised an eyebrow, glancing back at the screen.

“Huh?”

Before Oikawa could react, he was hit by a red shell right before crossing the finish line, Akaashi zooming ahead of him and taking first place once again. Oikawa was seriously sick of losing, especially when Akaashi acted like it was nothing. Oikawa grumbled in frustration, annoyed with having lost three times in a row now as he proposed one more round.

“Another one? You don’t know when to quit, huh?” Iwaizumi said, grinning. “I’m down for another one. What about you, Akaashi?”

“I can go for one more,” He said, and Oikawa puffed his chest, selecting the next race course and beginning the race. They took off, Akaashi taking the lead again as Iwaizumi and Oikawa immediately groaned.

Oikawa huffed, glancing at Akaashi, who sat there cool as a cucumber as if this were easy for him. It only frustrated Oikawa more, and he decided he would have to take a more… roundabout method.

Oikawa scooted closer to Akaashi, holding his controller up to his chin so he could steer while still accelerating, using his free hand to reach over and squeeze Akaashi’s side, making the dark haired boy jump, his controller fumbling out of his hand. He quickly picked it back up but he had already fallen behind to second place, Oikawa taking the lead as he laughed.

“You scared me,” Akaashi said flatly, almost as if nothing had happened and Oikawa only chuckled, driving his kart with both hands again as Akaashi grumbled.

“Sorry, I forgot how ticklish you are~” He teased, sticking his tongue out as Akaashi rolled his eyes, picking up a red shell. He chucked it at Oikawa, knocking him out for a moment as he passed him, making Oikawa cry out in frustration. 

He held his controller up to his chin again and scribbled his fingers across Akaashi’s tummy, making him gasp as he dropped his controller onto the floor as he went to protect himself, his character on the screen stopping as he stopped steering and accelerating.

Oikawa pulled his hand back, going back to the race as Akaashi went to pick up his controller, squeaking suddenly when Iwaizumi joined in, digging into his ribs for a moment and keeping him from picking up his controller.

“Stop that!” He said, his tone sounding slightly annoyed as he finally picked up his controller, looking on the screen before realizing he was in last place. He tried to catch up, but he felt another poke at his tummy and a claw at his ribs, making it nearly impossible to finish the race.

Oikawa had passed the finish line already, along with Iwaizumi, so now they began to tickle Akaashi as he tried to finish the race.

“Come on, Akaashi, we’re waiting on ya!” Iwaizumi teased, digging into Akaashi’s ribs as he giggled.

“We already won, but you need to finish for us!” Oikawa cooed, scribbling his fingers over Akaashi’s tummy. He threw his head back, shaking his head back and forth as he tried to squirm away from their hands, steering into the wall.

“That’s not the finish line, that’s a wall Akaashi,” Iwaizumi said with a grin, digging his hands under his arms, Akaashi barking out a sudden laugh before crumpling forward, dropping his controller as he swatted at their hands, not sure where to focus because of them ganging up on him.

Oikawa reached over to Akaashi’s thighs, giving them a firm squeeze as he did a full body jolt, gasping sharply as more laughter poured from his lips. Oikawa whistled, using both hands now to squeeze his upper thighs as Akaashi almost cackled, throwing his head back and stomping his feet, trying to squirm away from Oikawa’s devious hands.

“Stahahap! Oikawahahaha, not thehehehere! Iwaizuhuhumi, leave me alohohohone!” Akaashi pleaded, his face going red as his friends continued to tease him, pinching up his ribs and squeezing his knees as Akaashi wailed.

“EHEHehe! O-Oikawahahaha! Don’t you dahahare!" Akaashi hollered, Oikawa’s hands on his hips as he grinned at Akaashi, giving them a quick squeeze. Akaashi jumped, immediately grabbing onto Oikawa’s wrists to try and pull his hands off, just them touching his hips felt unbearable. 

So when Oikawa started kneading his hips again, Akaashi couldn’t control the squeal that escaped his lips as he dissolved into frantic laughter, unable to articulate words because of how hard he was laughing.

Iwaizumi chuckled, moving up and down his ribs, occasionally digging under his arms as Akaashi whined, kicking his legs and squirming around on the couch as he tried to shake the pair off of him. 

After a few moments Akaashi’s laughter went silent. Oikawa and Iwaizumi looked at each other and pulled their hands away from Akaashi, giving the poor boy a chance to breathe. His chest heaved as he looked at the two of them, giggles still escaping his lips.

Iwaizumi handed him the controller when he regained his composure, flashing him a small grin.

“You’ve still gotta finish the race,” He said, and Akaashi huffed, taking the controller from him and driving the little kart across the finish line, ending the race before putting the controller down. 

Oikawa wrapped an arm around his shoulder, Iwaizumi doing the same as he ruffled Akaashi’s hair, the two of them laughing as Akaashi chuckled softly, playfully shoving them off of him. 

“One more round?” Oikawa asked, picking up his own controller. Akaashi hummed.

“Only if you play fair,” He said with a grin, Oikawa poking his tummy as Akaashi jumped.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about~”

Iwaizumi picked up his controller as well, Oikawa starting their next race. Would they really play fair this time?

[wicked-mind]

Soulmates- Chapter Five

Summary: Soulmates are connected on a deeper level emotionally and physically. They can feel what the other needs and wants. As hints, the universe grants tattoos on your skin to help you find your soulmate when you’re about to meet them. When Bucky’s soulmate tattoo appears out of the blue, he knows that she is about to come into his life, but the way she does is not what he was expecting.

Word Count: 5.9k

Warnings: Swearing, as usual. Violence, minor character death (OC character), smut (Yup, some smut in here so minors please exit. I'm also new at writing smut so don't expect much lol)

All Writings Masterlist

*gifs not mine

Previously

Y/N bit her lip at his touch, feeling his anger and need to protect her from their bond. She lifts her hands to wrap around his shoulders and behind his neck instinctively, taking a deep breath. Nobody except Natasha knew the story but she knew she could trust Bucky with the truth, “Sometimes it still feels like I’m still laying there on the floor, watching the sun rise through the window and trying to stay awake and alive.” She whispers softly. This was a side of her she thought she lost the night her twin tried to kill her, the part that wanted to trust and be loved. Her soulmate bond to Bucky pulled the truth out of her, wanting to be honest with him. Let him see all the broken and torn up pieces inside her, “Sometimes it feels like the scar still burns, like it’s an open wound I can’t get rid of telling me I should’ve died. I hate it.”

Bucky frowned at her words against her neck, picking her up by her hips and moving to lay her on the bed. He crawled on top of Y/N, looking into her eyes with his stormy blue ones, “Darling, that scar proves you are a survivor.” He whispered down to her, lifting her shirt with one hand to expose the scar. He looked down it as he traced his flesh fingers along it, causing goosebumps to appear on her skin at his touch, “It’s a part of you, and it may be a dark part of you, but it’s still something that made you who you are. And as much as I hate that you went through that, I’m also grateful it made you a strong, bad-ass woman.” He smirks at her slightly, crawling down and brushing his lips over her scar, kissing the raised skin softly. He grinned when he heard a small whimper pass her lips, “My strong, bad-ass woman. And I will spend the rest of my life kissing this scar so when you look at it, you only think of me.”

Chapter Five -

Bucky did as he said, he kept kissing along her scar that rested on her hip. Y/N’s fingers tangled in his hair, pulling his head upwards so that she was looking into his eyes. His eyes locked onto her’s and he had never felt so calm yet so on fire all at the same time. He lifted a hand to brush the skin on her cheek, watching her shiver slightly at the touch of his cold vibranium fingers.

Y/N bit her lip as she watched Bucky above her, studying his features. It was odd, she had never felt this way before when a man had looked at her. She could blame it all on her soulmate bond to him but the way he looked at her like she was the most beautiful creature he’d laid eyes on made her stomach fill with butterflies that she long thought had shriveled up and died in her stomach. Her attention broke from him when she hears her phone ringing. Y/N quickly shimmied herself out from under Bucky’s muscular frame and pulled her phone out of her pocket, pressing it to her ear, “Weasel, I thought you kicked me out.” She said into the speaker with a smile, listening to Weasel talk on the other end, “No, of course I want a job. I’ll come by and collect the card.” She said then snaps the phone shut.

Bucky adjusted on the bed to lay on his side, watching Y/N talk on the phone. Of course, he had heard every word from the other side of the speaker. Bucky couldn’t help but feel like the moment they are having was ruined, but he knew it’d take a little bit for Y/N to get comfortable with the fact she had a soulmate. He slowly stood up, watching her curiously, “I don’t know if taking a job is the best thing to do right now. Wouldn’t want to cause a scene that could lead your brother right to you.” He said, walking closer to her.

Y/N watched Bucky walk towards her, smiling a little at his words, “Oh no, wouldn’t want that.” She told him, placing the phone back into her pocket, “You coming or not?” She asks as she stepped around him and walked towards his bedroom door.

“Where are we going?” Bucky asks, following her closely as he shrugged his leather jacket back on over his shoulders.

“To do a job and cause a scene.” Y/N replied mischievously.

As much as Bucky thought this was the wrong decision, he felt he already knew Y/N well enough to know there wasn’t going to be much of an argument and she was going to do what she wanted so he may as well stick around to protect her. Bucky led her to the garage where he swung his legs over his motorcycle, watching as she straddled his bike behind him. His grin grew when he felt her arms wrap around her waist, “Hold on, doll.”

Y/N rolled her eyes slightly, “Not my first time I’ve been on a motorcycle, lover boy. Let’s go.” She said softly into the back of his ear, smiling when the bike roared to life and they zoomed out of the facility and down the long driveway. It didn’t take long for them to arrive outside of Sister Margaret’s School for Wayward Children. Y/N slid off the back of the bike, “Stay here, I won’t be long. This is the only entrance anyhow so you might as well play look out.” She told him before disappearing through the doors. Y/N stood at the end of the bar, quickly catching the attention of Weasel.

“Here’s your card.” Weasel said in a hushed voice, passing it over to Y/N and grabbing her out a beer to make it look like it was just a casual conversation, “You know what a gold card like that means.”

Y/N looked at Weasel suspiciously before slowly flipping the card over to reveal a name. The front of this card was different. Usually the cards were pure gold except for a small chip and a name, but this one had the chip, the name, and a red skull next to the name. Y/N quickly flipped the card back over and placed it on the bar with her palm, not wanting any wondering eyes to see it, “You seen him around lately?” The red skull signified it was a fellow mercenary to hunt down, and this name was one she recognized.

Weasel shook his head, “Hadn’t seen him for a while, but he did come around the night you went to the fancy gala. He was coming around asking for you. There’s a reason they assigned him to you and you can’t deny the job.”

Y/N nodded slowly, tucking the gold card slowly into the pocket of her jeans, looking at the wall of alcohol behind Weasel as she tried to think, “I know. I’ll take care of it.” She told him with a small smile before making her way back outside to Bucky.

“How was it?” Bucky asks when he sees her. He could feel the emotions running through her body, the conflict of whatever happened inside. It made him want to be there for her, help her through whatever was going through her brain.

Y/N ran her fingers through her hair slowly as she looked at Bucky before around him, “The job I’ve been assigned comes from the top. It’s a kill hit on another mercenary.” She told him, folding her arms across her chest and biting her lip.

Bucky’s brown furrowed a little bit. He could tell this job was already bothering Y/N but he couldn’t figure out exactly why, “Who is it? You know ‘em?” He asks, moving from leaning against his bike to stand in front of her.

Y/N scrunched her nose and closed one eye as she looked at him, “He’s an ex of mine, another mercenary. He got into some trouble with those who hire us and needs to be taken care of.” She said, watching Bucky’s face stay the same but those eyes… they flashed with what she could only assume was jealousy, “I hope you’re not the jealous type.” She teased with a small smile.

Bucky rolls his eye at her comment, folding his arms across his chest, “I’m sure there’s a reason he’s an ex, doll.” He told her, walking towards her until he was towering over her, looking down into her eyes with a crooked grin, “And if there isn’t, I’ll be that reason.”

Y/N couldn’t help but smile at his words, licking her top lip lightly, “I can feel the jealousy dripping from you already. You probably shouldn’t come along.” She told him, standing up on her toes so she could brush her lips against his lightly before turning on her heels and starting to walk down the street, “I’ll catch up with you later.” She said to him over her shoulder.

Bucky frowned. She was a tease and although he liked the game of cat and mouse with her, he wasn’t about to just let her go on a job with an ex that happened to be a fellow mercenary. Bucky was a lot of things but Y/N brought out the sides of him he didn’t know existed. She brought out a protective, almost possessive side that he couldn’t shake. Not when it came to her. He quickly swung his legs back over his motorcycle, bringing it to life and slowly riding it alongside Y/N as she walked, “C’mon, doll. At least let me give you a ride.”

Y/N continued her pace until she looked over towards him. God dammit… those blue eyes just sucked her right in. She stopped and nodded, “Fine.” She said and hung her legs over behind him, gripping onto his waist, “But you should still wait outside when we get there. Head straight down this street for two miles then make a left.”

Bucky grinned at her touch of her arms wrapping around his waist. This felt right, the two of their bodies touching made his heart skip a beat. Fuck, he was done when it came to her. He would follow her to the ends of the earth without even a second thought. Bucky followed her directions, pulling up outside a club. He had seen this club a few times, it had a bad reputation for where the big, bad, and ugly partied. He stiffened a little as Y/N got off his motorcycle, feeling uneasy about the whole thing, “You think this is where he is?”

Y/N turned and looked to Bucky who still sat on his motorcycle, “Yeah, we used to come here to party after jobs. If we weren’t at Sister Margaret’s, we were here.” She told him, then tilts her head, “You have a knife?”

Bucky nodded towards her request, pulling one of his black knives from a sheath around his ankle and passed it to her. He raised an eyebrow as he watched Y/N cut the fabric on her tank top, leaving it to hang around the bottom of her breasts before working on her black jeans next, cutting them into shorts. Now it was clinking on why she wanted him to wait outside, Y/N was going to have to put on her sex appeal game to deal with this job, “I’m definitely coming in.”

Y/N chuckles a little, throwing the cut fabric into a trash can outside the club doors, “Alright, but be a good boy and keep some distance.” She told Bucky, watching as he swung his legs off the motorcycle and follow her into the club. She gave a glance to the bouncer who opened the locked door for her, letting Bucky and herself into the dark club. There were red lights flashing and the club was filled with bodies who were dancing, drinking, and fighting in a boxing ring set in the middle. She glanced over to Bucky, “Don’t get into trouble.” She told him before slipping away through the crowd.

Although she had slipped away, Bucky managed to walk himself over to the bar and keep an eye on her movement. She was running her fingers through her hair, causing it to fluff and tangle a little as she made her way to the dance floor, smiling and swinging her hips. Bucky ordered a beer from the bartender and leaned his back against the bar, watching her. How he envied the men who tried to come and dance with her, pressing their hips to her’s and running their hands up her body. It made him deeply jealous, wanting him to be the only one that touched her like that. He would have to erase every touch another man has given her. It all came to a pause though when a tall, muscular, dark haired man pushed the other man out of the way and placed his hands on Y/N’s waist, leaning his head down onto her shoulder like he was whispering something in her ear. Bucky could hear everything they were saying to each other due to his enhanced abilities even over the roaring of the music.

Y/N looked at the new man touching her, recognizing him instantly. He was her ex, the name on the card she had been handed. Blake Michaels. She slowly wrapped her arms up and around the back of his neck, pushing her body to his as he whispered in her ear.

“What’re you doin’ here, sweetheart?” Blake groaned out into her ear, a smirk playing on his pink lips.

Y/N shrugged, a smile set on her lips, “What? Like I can’t have a good time without you?” She purred out to him, pulling him closer by her grip on the back of his neck.

Blake chuckled at her response, moving his hands down to her ass and picking her up to wrap her legs around his waist. He started carrying her off the dance floor and to the bathroom. Once they were inside, he sat her on the counter by the sinks, “I heard you had a soulmate now.” He told her with a crooked grin, eyeing her heavily tattooed arm.

Y/N shrugged, looking at her tattoo. It burned slightly at the touch of another man who wasn’t Bucky but she ignored it, “You know how I feel about soulmates.” She told Blake, tilting her head at him, “I heard you found yours too.”

Blake chuckled darkly, running a hand through his hair before placing it on the mirror behind Y/N, cornering her in, “I did. She’s six feet under now though, couldn’t have her getting in the way. Soulmates make you weak.”

Y/N took a deep breath at his closeness to her, his face was inches away from her. And even though it was a man she had spent a lot of time with in situations like this one, her body was telling her it was wrong and uncomfortable, “Why are you here, Blake?”

Blake grinned at her, “I think you know the answer to that.” He told Y/N before moving one hand to grip her neck while the other stayed planted against the mirror, “You’re not the only one that got a card.” The hand on the mirror moved to his pocket, pulling out a gold card with Y/N’s name on it and a red skull, “Gemini wants a chat.”

Y/N swallowed hard against the grasp on her throat, eyes widening a little at the card before she put on an emotionless face. Showing no emotion was one of the first things they taught you in The Red Room Academy. She moved one of her legs from around his waist to push her foot against his chest, trying to push him away from her. When she couldn’t get away, she moved her foot up further to kick him in the nose, causing him to stumble back. Y/N stood from the bathroom counter, cracking her neck as she looked at Blake’s bleeding nose, “I have no intention of seeing him.” She hissed out, moving her head out of the way when he threw a punch. She circled behind him and kicked him head first into the bathroom counter before walking towards him, pulling her arm back to throw another punch but was met with a kick to the stomach, causing her back to hit the stall behind her as a small groan passed her lips.

Blake grinned down at Y/N, crossing over to her before she could stand and pinning her down with one foot to her chest. He leaned himself down to look at her face, tilting his head as blood from his nose dripped down onto her stomach and what was left of her white tank top, “Gemini said to bring you back alive… He didn’t say anything about bringing you back unharmed.” He told her as he pulled out a knife, flicking the blade out and throwing it into her shoulder.

It didn’t take long after that until Bucky came flying through the bathroom door, feeling Y/N’s sudden pain and hearing some type of commotion in the bathroom. His eyes darkened as he saw Blake with his foot on Y/N’s chest and a the knife sticking out of her shoulder. His angry gaze set on Blake, walking towards him and grabbing onto his throat with his vibranium arm that made mechanical noises as it moved. Bucky slammed Blake against the wall, holding him high enough off the floor that his feet were dangling above the floor. Bucky couldn’t find words, the only thing he was seeing was white hot rage.

Y/N got up, pulling the knife out of her shoulder and twisting it in her fingers. She walks over and puts one hand on Bucky’s arm, “I got this, it’s okay.” She said softly to him, knowing her words and touch would calm him. She watched Bucky drop Blake to the floor, stepping back a little with a look towards Y/N. She nodded at him then focused her gaze back on Blake who was getting to his feet, “Blake, meet my soulmate.” She said to him, twisting the knife in her fingers again.

Blake’s eyes flickered between Bucky and Y/N, a smirk appearing on his lips, “Little bit of a damaged good if I have to say so myself. Does he just stare?” He teased and looked back to Y/N.

Y/N shrugs slightly, “He likes to stare. Sort of his thing.” She replied before advancing, swinging the knife that only connected every few swipes. Blake knew a lot of her movements from their time together and easily blocked most of them, even landing a few himself. Y/N gripped onto his arm, dropping the knife from her grip as she crawled on top of him, wrapping her legs around his shoulders and landing elbows to his head as he slammed her back against the walls trying to get her off. She adjusts herself on his shoulders, slipping down a little so she could wrap one arm around his throat and the other on the top of his head. As Blake flailed around trying to get her off of him, he turned his neck which was what Y/N was waiting for. When he moved his neck, the hand on her head gripped the side of his face and pulled his neck further one way while her other arm pushed his neck the other way. One snap, and Blake was on the floor and Y/N caught herself on the wall so she wouldn’t fall.

Bucky watched the fight ensue, wanting to help but knew Y/N had it covered. Once he watched Blake fall to the floor dead with a snap of his neck, Bucky’s eyes flashed to Y/N and helped hold her up, “You alright?” He asks before continuing, “You shouldn’t of killed him. We should’ve brought him back to the facility.”

Y/N looked at Bucky, frowning a little, “The job was to kill him, Bucky. I know that’s not you anymore but you don’t know what he’s done. If his name appeared on the card, it was for a good reason.” She told him, pushing herself out of his grasp and leaning down to Blake’s body, pulling the gold card with her name out of his pocket, “Besides, he had my name also from Gemini. He wouldn’t of stopped until the job was done and anybody who works for my brother deserves death.”

Bucky’s grow furrowed at the card, seeing Y/N’s name on it, “Well, we should probably get out of here. Don’t want to be the ones standing over a body.” He said, remembering suddenly Y/N’s wound to her shoulder. He stepped forward and put his hand over it, pushing slightly to put some pressure on it.

Y/N leaned into his grip, “Yeah, probably should go. I mean, the body won’t matter. Someone always winds up dead in the bathroom here anyway.” She chuckles a little, slumping against him slightly as the adrenaline left her body.

Bucky wraps his arm around Y/N’s waist, helping her out of the bathroom and walking her out of the club. Nobody even glanced twice at the blood that spattered on Y/N, it was a regular thing at this club for someone to end up battered. Bucky helped her onto his bike, making sure she was secure around him before zooming back towards the facility. Once they were back inside, he immediately led her to the med bay where she sat on the counter while Bucky examined her wound, stitching slowly, “I could’ve helped you.” He said, breaking the silence.

“It wasn’t your job.” Y/N replied, her face unmoving as the needle threaded through her skin. She watched Bucky closely, he was so focused on her wound but she could tell there was something hiding behind his eyes.

Bucky finished the last stitch, setting down the needle and finally meeting her gaze, “I’m your soulmate, Y/N.” He said to her, “That may not mean much to you but it means everything to me. Do you know how long I’ve waited for you? I thought I was going to be alone forever, losing out on the only thing that I thought could bring me even an ounce of happiness.” His voice was growing more bitter with every word, slowly standing so he towered over Y/N as she sat, “You’re my soulmate. I feel everything you do. Your pain, grief, rage. I feel all of that. And I know you feel something for me… It may not be love, but it’s something. I feel it. So why can’t you just let me help you?”

Y/N bit her lip as she listened to him, feeling the honesty in his words. She took a deep breath, running her fingers through her hair slowly as her gaze set on his eyes… Those hypnotizing puddles of blue that made her stomach twist in a way that wasn’t sick, but warm. She pulled her eyes away, looking at her hands, “I’m sorry, Bucky.” She said softly, honestly, “I know I’m not the best soulmate. I’m sure you were expecting instant sparks and love-doviness all around. I was trained to resist the soulmate bond.” She told him, returning her eyes to his as she watched a hint of sadness appear behind them, “But I do feel something for you. And I don’t want to resist it.”

Those words were all Bucky needed to hear. Some sort of acknowledgement of their bond was enough for him to step closer, positioning himself between her legs as she sat on the table in front of him. His vibranium hand moved to rest on the back of her neck, pulling her face close to his until their lips met. He groaned a little feeling her kiss him back, slipping his tongue between her parted lips. There it was. There was that spark he had been waiting for from Y/N. His flesh hand moved down her back, pulling her forward until she instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist to not slip off the edge. He separated his lips from her’s, kissing down her jaw and to her neck, smiling when he heard Y/N breathe out his name as she craved more of his touch, “I’m gonna rip your stitches if I keep going, doll.” He breathed out between kisses to Y/N’s neck.

Y/N didn’t care, her fingers snaking up into his hair and letting out deep breathes as every touch of his felt like fire on her skin, igniting a fire within her she long thought had been extinguished, “You can just stitch it up again later…” She responds, a small moan passing her lips when he kissed the crook of her neck.

Bucky pulls himself away from her, looking at her figure. She still had blood on her shirt and skin and suddenly a thought came into his head and he grinned, “C’mon darlin. I’ll get you cleaned up.” He picked her up, keeping her legs wrapped around his waist. His breath kept hitching when he felt Y/N press her face into his neck, leaving small kisses and love bites along his skin. Bucky didn’t waste anytime carrying her to the elevator, clicking the button to the floor with his room on it. Once the doors opened, he immediately made his way down the hallway passing Sam and Natasha on the way who just stared at them until Bucky was in his room with the door slamming behind him. He walked her right into his bathroom, sitting her on the counter and separated his body from hers, grinning at her as he stepped into his shower and turned it on before returning in front of Y/N. He peeled off his shirt slowly, his dog tags jingling with the movement and dropping to his bare chest once he was freed of his shirt.

Y/N tilted her head and smiled at him as she saw his bare chest. She bit her bottom lip and reached out a leg to wrap around the back of his thigh, pulling him closer to her body again. She ran her hands up his muscular figure, watching him shiver a little at her touch. She leans up against him, pressing her lips against his chest softly.

Bucky groaned at her touch, he couldn’t help it. She was so intoxicating to him with every touch. He pushed her away gently, slowly lifting Y/N’s shirt off of her gently as to not disturb the wound he had just stitched. He grinned at her before dropping his hands to his jeans, undoing his belt and zipper and pushing them down around his ankles and stepping out of the clothing to be left in his boxers. He quickly disappeared behind the glass of the shower that had steamed up before throwing the boxers up over the top to land beside Y/N on the counter, “You coming or what, doll?”

Y/N laughs a little, licking her lips as she did. She scoots herself off the counter and quickly freed herself from the rest of her clothing before slipping into the shower with Bucky. Her body was immediately pressed against the tile wall by his muscular frame, causing her to gasp a little. She could feel all of his skin against her’s and it was electrifying. She pushed her chest up against his, smiling as she heard a small groan pass his lips again. It was like music to her ears, a sound she wanted to hear over and over again.

Bucky ran his hands over Y/N’s bare body, familiarizing himself with every part of her skin. His vibranium hand rested against her breast as the other trailed down her stomach until he found between her legs, grinning as he felt her already wet and not from the water, “Mhm, doll.” He whispers as he pressed his lips to her’s, “You’re already ready for me?”

Y/N whimpers against his lips at his words as his flesh hand slowly entered between her folds, making her hips thrust up against his. She could feel his hard length on her hip, making her wiggle with want. Even though he slipped another finger into her entrance, that wasn’t enough. She wanted more of him. Her body wanted all of him, “Please Bucky…” She moans out, her voice echoing against the shower walls.

Bucky moved his kisses along her jaw. He knew he was driving her wild by the way her hips pressed against his in want and the way her wet walls ached around his finger’s, “All you had to do was ask, pretty girl.” He purred out to her, pulling his fingers out from her core. He quickly lifted her up and wrapped her legs around his waist as he pressed her back to the tile wall, lining his thick member up with her entrance and letting out a deep breath as he felt her slick on his tip. He slowly slid himself into her, pulling his face away from her’s so he could watch Y/N’s features twist in pleasure as he inched his way deep into her core. Once he was all the way in, he stilled feeling her walls pulse around his cock and adjust to his size.

Y/N tilted her head back as he stilled inside her, even just him unmoving was enough to send her over the edge. That coil in her stomach tightened painfully, causing her to whimper out Bucky’s name between pleads of him to move inside her.

“Mhm… You want me to move, darlin?” Bucky asks, grinning at the sight of her pleading with him as his name passed her lips. Since he had met Y/N, he had never seen her plead with anybody or fall apart into a submissive state and seeing her like this and knowing he was the cause of it was driving him wild. He slowly started to thrust in and out of her, watching her breasts bounce against his chest gently with every thrust. God she was beautiful, but even more gorgeous with her naked body pressed against his. His own groans mixed with the sweet sounds that passed Y/N’s lips as he quickened his pace until his hips were slamming against hers, thrusting into her as deep as he could.

Y/N was letting out gasps and loud moans between deep breaths at his thrusts. Nobody had made her feel this good before, pushing her off the edge so quickly. She could blame it on the soulmate bond, the want their bodies needed to be like this but she knew this pleasure was just pure Bucky. Her hands gripped onto his shoulders, her nails leaving small crescent shapes as she gripped onto him, “Oh fuck….” She hissed out when he hit the right spot inside of her, causing her to fall of the edge in an orgasm. She slumped slightly against his chest, leaning her head on his shoulder as she whimpered out.

Bucky let out a loud groan when he felt Y/N release on him but didn’t slow his pace, “So good… Exactly made for me…” He thrust into her quickly a few more times before setting her down on her feet, pulling out of her slowly. He moved his hands to her waist, quickly turning her around against the tile wall. One of his hands trailed down her waist until it was behind her knee, forcing it up against the wall as he positioned himself back to her slick entrance from behind, pushing himself back in with one swift thrust. He growled slightly as he placed his forehead on the back of Y/N’s shoulder, nipping at her skin as he thrust fast and hard into her until he felt her walls clench against him, knowing she was close again.

Y/N gasped as the cold tile pressed against her chest, then the gasp turned into a loud moan when he slid back into her. Her body shook against his as he thrust into her making her body almost collapse against the wall if it wasn’t for Bucky pinning her there. Her body crumbled as her second orgasm peaked, arching her back against the wall and throwing her head back into a soft scream of pleasure.

Bucky smiled against Y/N’s skin as she came again, thrusting deep into her before pulling out, his thick white, hot strands landing on Y/N’s thigh and dripping down onto the tile floor. He quickly turned her around, watching her eyes roll slightly back as her body shook with pleasure. He held her upright until the ripples in her body passed, kissing all over her face gently trying to bring her back from her high, “Bet nobody’s done that to you before, doll.” He teased out with a chuckle, “So good you gotta take a break?”

Y/N breathed deeply, catching her breath and laughing a little at his comments, “I knew you were the jealous type… I know you were thinking of erasing every trace of Blake from my body.” She teased back knowingly. She could feel what he was thinking when they were at the club when Blake’s hands were all over her, jealousy and possession dripped off him when it came to her. She slowly pushed him away from her, “At least you don’t have to stitch me up again.” She said softly, looking at her shoulder that had remained stitched shut before looking up to Bucky with a smile, “Let’s get cleaned up. Sex always makes me hungry, but great sex makes me ravenous.”

After Y/N and Bucky finished their shower together and got dressed, they walked out into the kitchen where Sam and Natasha were sitting. Sam had a scowl on his face towards Bucky, “Man, my room is right next to yours. And the shower echoes.” He hissed out.

Y/N laughs a little and rolls her eyes before Bucky could speak, “Hey, I was ready to go in the med-bay. At least we made it to the shower so everybody didn’t get a show.” She snapped back with a smile as Natasha started dying in laughter.

Bucky couldn’t help but chuckle, sneaking his arm around Y/N’s waist and pulling her closer as he kissed her temple softly. Now, Y/N was his and he wasn’t going to let her go. Their bodies were like one, each other could feel everything the other felt physically and mentally. Bucky got what he always wanted, a deeper connection with someone and nobody was more perfect for him than Y/N. For once he found himself thanking the world and all the things it had done to him just to lead him to Y/N.

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Taglist: @vibraniumqueen @thatoneperson5000 @dude-whatawave @buckypops @tanyaherondale

If I missed anybody on the taglist or you would like to be added, please let me know (: Thank you for the support!

[bbugyu]

if you wanted to go to the moon, he would take you there.

plot twist | crash zoom | happy ending

16.1k (lol) | joshua x afab enby!reader, fluff, humor, suggestive, reader is ace lol, youtuber au, chef au, swearing, drinking, detailed descriptions of meals, mentions of past trauma including sexual assault, i swear it's not that deep, lots of implied sex but none on screen (yet), watching movies and playing video games, yes i am trying to set up all my friends, would anyone get it if i said r&r

welcome to part two of classic!! please enjoy this tooth rotting relationship garbo in which i basically announce to the world that i have a disgusting crush on joshua. posting this later than intended but i started working five tens so i'm 😅 a little tired lol. but joshua makes it ok <3

when you mentioned offhandedly that you had never had bibimbap in jeonju, joshua practically dropped the groceries he was helping you bring up the elevator.

"how long have you been in korea?" he asked.

you looked at him, wide eyed. "four years?"

he squinted at you, jutting his jaw out. "and you've never gone to jeonju? it's, like, the food hub of korea. how the hell?"

"i…" you laughed, exiting the elevator when the doors opened. "i don't know? it's never been top priority, i guess?"

"okay, well it is now," he stated plainly, following you to your door while you adjusted your bags in your hands to punch in the code. as soon as the groceries were safely on your counter, he pulled out his phone. "friday to sunday?"

you looked up from the vegetables in your hands. "what?"

he looked at you. "we're going. this weekend? i need to reserve the ktx tickets."

you laughed. "this weekend? joshua, it's wednesday."

"okay, next weekend?"

you stared at him a second, purely because you were in disbelief. "no, i have a demonstration next saturday."

he exhaled, looking at the calendar on his phone. "okay, and jamie's birthday party is the weekend after, so," he paused, looking at you through his lashes. "this weekend?"

you pushed your hands onto the counter and sighed heavily. "when would we leave?"

he grinned, knowing that meant he had won you over. "after i get off work? i can be here by 3:30."

"how long is the train?"

"uhh," he quickly searched for the tickets. "two hours. less than. we can buy snacks for the ride and have dinner when we get there."

you chewed your lip. "i have to edit on sunday, so we can't stay all day."

he nodded, inspecting the time table for tickets. "stay two nights, leave after breakfast?"

you considered that for a second. "i could bring my laptop and export footage on the train."

a smile crept across his face when you puffed out your cheeks in thought. "is that a yes?"

your cheeks deflated as you exhaled. "fine."

"yeah?" joshua grinned at you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and tugging you into his chest. "jeonju this weekend?"

you exhaled again, your arms reluctantly winding around his torso. "yeah. jeonju this weekend."

"you're gonna love it," he said, pressing his lips against your temple. "i helped on an article about hole in the wall finds there years ago, so i know all the good spots."

you giggled, pulling away to look at him with a quirked eyebrow. "you used to write for the magazine?"

he shook his head at you. "when i was interning."

"aw," you poked at his cheek. "intern joshie?"

he rolled his eyes, separating himself from you as you giggled, and he looked at you slyly from the corner of his eye. "joshie?"

you grinned, reaching out to pinch his cheeks. "joshie!"

he laughed and batted away your hands. "joshie?"

you: i think i'm finally packed

joshie: i don't understand why it was so difficult when we're going for Two Days.

you: 😡

joshie: 😘

as promised, he arrived at your apartment in a cab and stubbornly took your roller suitcase despite your insistence that you could handle it. joshua was always doing things like this - for you, you imagined, he would probably even lay down his jacket in a puddle so you wouldn't have to walk through it. but at the same time, he wouldn't fault you for kicking his jacket aside and purposefully jumping in it instead. he would probably join you, even.

he had joked with you that this would be like a work trip for you, but only because he was the one that suggested you film - plus, he reminded you, filming a full video this weekend meant that you didn't have to film next week. and to be perfectly frank, you wanted the break. if you could have a weekend getaway with joshua and then a week long break to have a normal routine without a camera, it was a win-win.

equipped with coffee and cafe sandwiches, you casually kicked your feet and happily sipped at your americano as you edited a picture of it for your instagram story. joshua sat beside you, also doing something on his phone, and you watched him with no intention as he pulled his airpods out of his coat jacket and offered one to you. you looked at him, smiling when he gestured with the open case again.

"i made a playlist," he said quietly as you put the airpod into your ear. he took the one you left and did the same, tapping on his phone.

the thought of joshua hearing a song and thinking of you making your chest flutter to life, the heat rising through you until you were left in a comfortable glow, smiling softly at him as a melody started in your ear. he looked back at you, double taking slightly when he realized you were looking at him.

"what's that look for?" he asked, a sideways grin breaking his face in half.

you shook your head, unable to change your face. "that's, just... really nice."

"making a playlist?" he hummed, settling back in his seat as you stuck your straw between your lips. "i didn't consciously do it. i just started a list of songs to show you because i thought you would like them, and this ended up being a good time to share it."

you sighed dramatically, falling back against the window of the train. "that's even nicer, you dickhead!" he laughed, shushing you and looking around, worried someone might have understood your slightly-above-inside-voice exclamation. "i know for a fact i didn't do anything to deserve the sweetest, handsomest, loveliest boyfriend on the planet, so what's the catch, mr. hong?"

his eyes went to the ceiling as he thought, kneading his lips once before saying, "i think you forgot funniest, too."

"ah," you said, a dry chuckle following the realization. "that's the catch."

"hey!" he laughed, eyes big as he pretended to be offended. "i know i'm funny!"

you giggled with him, mentally noting that you liked the song that he was playing. that he must have somehow picked up on why you liked the music you did. you thought about how you had the same thought, sometimes, when you were listening to music alone in your room and a song popped up on your discovery that sounded like something he would listen to. how you would immediately text them to him, knowing you would forget if you didn't send it right away, and he would react with some assortment of positive emojis. how he must have been doing the same thing, but wanted to be there when you heard them, and didn't have the same flighty memory as you. you brought your straw to your lips again, staring after him as he adjusted something in his bag, taking too long to refocus your attention to story you had been trying to post.

he later nudged you, getting your attention as you responded to an email on your phone, gesturing his finger with the melody, and you gave him a childlike look of awe, as if to tell him that yes, you agreed, this was exactly the kind of run you really enjoyed. he pounded a fist against his knee at the beats, pointing up at the key change, and you exploded into a stifled laugh, your palm covering your mouth. he laughed with you before he showed you the now playing page on his phone, holding it open dutifully as you quickly searched for it to add to your own library.

as promised, joshua provided great insight for the food tour the two of you set out on. travel day, he had told you, meant that you would have something easy - bibimbap and makgeolli at two of the best places he knew, apparently. by the time you made it back to the hotel room you had checked into before headed to the bar, you just about collapsed onto the queen bed.

"i'm so full," you exhaled, eyes dancing across the ceiling. "i'm never gonna move again."

joshua just laughed at you, toeing both of your shoes aside at the door before shuffling into slippers. "we have a full day of eating tomorrow, so you better move."

you let our a breathy laugh, rolling your head to watch as he flopped onto the bed beside you. "i'm glad you also plan trips around the meals."

he gave you a puzzled look. "is there another way to plan a trip?"

you rolled onto your side, tucking your arm under your head to look at him. "some people like sightseeing. or activities."

his brows were still ruffled in confusion as he looked away from you. "i like looking at food. and the activity of eating food."

you giggled, and his face finally broke to reveal the bewilderment had been a bit all along, his smiling laugh meeting yours.

you walked a lot the next day, and you were grateful for the light exercise to help your digestion a bit between meals. the local famous kalguksu for breakfast, a visit to a cafe for coffee before walking down a historical street together. you filmed with a smile on your face, shaking your americano for camera with a colorful background, just for you to pull down the drink and let the beautiful buildings and trees take the focus.

joshua could watch you forever, he was pretty sure. watching you conceptualise what you wanted this out of the ordinary video to look like, seeing the way you managed to be present with him, joking and giggling on your scenic walk, but squeezed his hand in warning before letting go, telling him quietly you wanted to get a shot. he had seen the way you filmed food, and how you filmed your kitchen, which was incredible in its own right, but this was the first time he got to see your process on the fly. when you went to work, as it were, taking in your scenery and deciding the way you wanted to portray it - more thought went into this than filming at the same barbeque restaurant for the fifth time, but joshua saw the similarities in the way your eyes twinkled when you saw something through your camera lens for the first time, even if only the first time that day. the way you would review the footage quickly, smiling at the way it turned out, but announcing that you were taking a second shot for safety.

then, he took you to another restaurant.

you barely noticed the passage of time, but when he conveniently "happened" upon the next stop on your food tour, you were pretty sure your stomach growled at the thought of eating an insane amount of dumplings, and you smiled at him in a way that made him want to cause it constantly.

if having your pick at dumplings was enough to make you giddy like a child, the night market was life altering. the food stalls were set up like they always were friday and saturday nights, joshua told you, and that meant you got to experience korean street food in a way you hadn't yet. you found the best pad thai you had ever eaten, succumbed to the tempting smell of grilled squid when passing a busy stall, and you even got served alcohol practically in passing, the specialty liquor being offered in a way that was hard for either of you to say no to. after a few too many, you had to stop joshua before he dragged you to a choco pie stall.

"we should eat more first," you said, gesturing to a woman making hashbrowns on a griddle. "while we have free hands. loop back around for dessert and buy some for the road."

joshua tapped his nose, then wagged his finger at you. "smart and hot."

you laughed, pulling him towards the hashbrown stall.

that night, you laid in bed beside each other, talking like you hadn't just spent literally the entire day together. recalling highlights of the day, sharing related anecdotes with assorted friends and family. you didn't even want to sleep - your body did, sure, clearly, by the way it kept interrupting your conversation with yawns. joshua would laugh, then yawn in response, and tell you that you should sleep. you would shake your head, a pout on your lips, and he would just smile and keep talking about whatever the yawn had interrupted.

being in bed with joshua wasn't demanding, nor was it uncomfortable, and you were pretty sure that meant something good.

you were making curry. he had mentioned that it looked good while you were watching some show the week prior and you couldn't get it out of your head. so, even though it was midsummer and far too warm for something as hearty as japanese curry, you decided you needed to make it anyway, if only for your own peace of mind. you invited joshua over to cook dinner for him, and he asked where your camera was when he arrived with your requested potatoes (you had some, except they were older than you thought and started sprouting), but you told him you weren't filming tonight.

"this ones for us," you said matter of factly, giggling when he looked shocked. "i don't film every meal, y'know. sometimes i cook things just for me."

he watched you dump the potatoes into the sink to wash. "what if it ends up being really pretty?"

"josh," you said, looking at him. "i don't make things that aren't pretty."

he asked if you needed help with anything, but you just shook your head and told him to relax. that you had made this a million times, and that you could do it with your eyes closed. he asked again if you were sure, and you laughed, scrubbing potatoes and using your shoulder to get your hair out of your face.

"actually," you said, raising the wrist on which you kept a hair tie. "do you know how? my hands are wet."

joshua smiled and nodded, coming over and pulling the tie off your wrist, careful to not get it too wet on your hand. "how high?"

"ariana," you said, making him laugh as you giggled. "as high as you can manage, but i don't really care."

he just smiled, taking your hair in his hands as you washed the potatoes one by one, and you tried to ignore the way you heart skipped a beat when you felt his touch drift across the back of your neck. he gently gathered it all in one palm at the crown of your skull, brushing through it with his fingers. "here?"

"perfect," you said, chewing your cheek and smiling. he pulled the band over your hair, tying it off tightly and pulled at the hair gently to keep it in place.

his hands glided over your waist, leading his arms to wrap around you as his chin landed on your shoulder. "not too tight?"

you shook your head, smiling. "you're multi talented."

"i have a sister," he reminded you, then put a kiss on your cheek.

you managed to convince him to sit at the counter, and he smiled and laughed with you as you conversed about anything that came to mind. he talked about his latest work antics, and you told him about a café you found the day before that you really enjoyed. he watched you skillfully chop vegetables and prepare chicken, flitting around your kitchen with a familiarity that could only be fostered by time. he glanced at the time on his phone, then looked at the door behind him that led to a bedroom.

"is karol here?" he asked. she normally would have emerged to say hi by now.

you looked at him before going back to pan frying the chicken. "no, she's in busan this weekend with some friends. she'll be back sunday night."

an alarm went off in joshua's head, and he tried not to think too deeply about the fact that you had invited him over while your roommate was away. sex hadn't even been a discussion on the table yet, but not because joshua didn't want it - because, frankly, he wanted it - he was just more concerned about you and your wants. for most things, he felt as though he had learned your thoughts and opinions naturally over the last few months, but outside of a few passing jokes, you hadn't ever mentioned how you felt about sex in general, much less sex with him.

so he stared at you, suddenly unable to ignore the fact that you were wearing shorts because of the weather, but they were hidden under the hem of the neutral toned apron he saw in your videos every week. or the way you smiled at him as you talked, your eyes glinting with mischief when you made a joke at his expense, but only made him laugh and want you more. he stood and came around the island, standing with his hip against the counter as the two of you continued conversing and you added the roux cubes to the pot.

his eyes never left you or your actions, and you noticed the way he inched towards you as your cooking became less involved and began to wrap up. you didn't argue when he put his arms around you again, watching you stir the curry with his cheek against your ear. he wasn't in your way, not even when you reached over to pull a spoon out of a drawer to give it a taste and make sure the seasonings were right, so you instead just enjoyed his presence.

you hummed, licking your lips briefly as you appraised the flavor. "not bad," you said, using the ladle you had been cooking with to pour more into the spoon you had just used to taste. you blew on it, then displayed it for joshua, who looked at you in his peripherals before accepting the bite.

"oh, wow," he said, making you giggle as you put the spoon aside. "that's better than a restaurant."

"thanks," you said, tapping the ladle on the side of pot to get the excess back in the pot, a spot of sauce landing on the back of your hand. you put it on the spoon rest next to your stovetop and replaced the lid on the pot of curry, quickly turning the burner to low. "now we just wait for the rice to pop," you said, spinning in his grip and licking the spot off the back of your hand.

joshua stared at you, desperately wishing in that moment that he wasn't such a damn man, because it was clear in your eyes that it was a completely innocent action. you got some of the delicious sauce on your hand, so why would you wipe it off when a towel wouldn't appreciate it like your tongue would? you wouldn't, obviously. he wouldn't have, either, if it had been his hand. but here he was, gaze fixed on your mouth as you pulled your hand away from it, and one of your eyebrows raised when you noticed.

"can i help you?" you asked, glancing down at his lips when he involuntarily leaned into you.

"i-" he swallowed. "sorry, i'm just-"

in that moment, you registered what his gaze meant. and while you were fairly oblivious to most things, you were far from innocent, so you put your arms over his shoulders and knit your fingers in his hair. "you're just?" you prompted.

there was a chuckle on his lips as he backed you against the counter, and he shook his head lightly. "i just think it's insane how into you i am."

joshua had this way of kissing you that made you think his life depended on it. he kissed you like you were in the final scene of an apocalyptic movie and he had come to terms with the fact that this was the end. like he knew that if your lips left his, he would magically disappear before he could tell you how much you meant to him. like he could stop time as long as he had you pressed against him with his hand on your jaw, but the sun was setting and he wasn’t ready to say good night.

when he finally pulled away from you, you were trying to catch your breath as his hands ran down your waist, and you stared into his eyes. his lips were parted, and his fingers gripped at your hips in a way that you knew meant he wished there were less layers between your skin.

your mind raced, thinking quickly back to how long the two of you had been seeing each other. how long you had known that you were interested in keeping joshua around for the long term. you wracked your brain, thinking about when people normally took the next step at your age, finding a discrepancy in the timing. you had made him wait for so long, but this was the first time you had noticed him trying to bed you - though, this was hardly subtle, so perhaps you had missed signs earlier? hell, the two of you had even shared a bed at this point, but you were pretty sure he hadn't tried anything then, either. you considered the fact that this relationship had gone for over two months without so much as a hint to take the next logical step, and you decided that joshua was definitely the only guy you had met in years that you would be willing to allow under your covers.

"the curry can sit for," you started, blinking rapidly as your mouth caught up to your mind. you swallowed once. "well, until tomorrow, technically, but-"

joshua's lip quirked upward. "did you invite me over to have me stay the night?"

"not-" you exhaled. his tone was slightly accusatory, but only playfully, and you found yourself more flustered by the question than you would have liked. "not consciously, but…" your eyes studied his face. "do you want to?"

"are you kidding?" he asked, making you breathe out a laugh, his forehead landing on yours. "did you not hear me when i said i was insanely into you?"

the rice cooker beeped, drawing both of your attention as it sang out a small tune to alert you it was finished. you looked at joshua. "are you hungry?"

he looked back at you, a smile sneaking on his lips. "i mean, working up an appetite wouldn't hurt, right?"

he let you lead him to your bedroom, which he had only been in once, briefly, when he had helped you put some lights away. the two of you admittedly spent most of your time in kitchens or restaurants, the remainder of your alone time being split between joshua's car and a couch to watch a movie, but joshua thought your taste suited his as he glanced around again, and that he would happily lose time in bedrooms with you. you kissed him again, and he was quick to pull you against his body, leaning into you, making you giggle as you bent backwards at the hips. "josh."

"what?" he asked, giving you a half lidded smile as his hand found your jaw, pulling you back into him. "stop leaning back and i'll stop chasing you."

"i'm-" you giggled into the kiss he interrupted you with. "i'm not leaning back, you're pushing me."

joshua made you feel like you were out of your depth, but in a way that was more exciting than scary. it had been ages since someone had been able to surprise you, or had helped you surprise yourself, but today he was doing both. the last time you had let a man into your heart, it had been less than perfect, especially towards the end, but joshua felt like home. cozy. he made you feel safe. like he wouldn't let you fall backwards unless your mattress was waiting for you.

and when you fell, he crawled over you, connecting your lips again with a hand against your jaw, the other holding himself above you, and you tried to restrain a whine.

"josh," you said suddenly, pushing on his chest lightly, processing fully what was about to happen and a shot of anxiety running through your chest. "c-can i tell you something first?"

joshua paused his motions, studying your eyes, his expression skewing scared. "oh, shit, are you a virgin?"

"what?" your eyebrows creased, a laugh on your lips. "no, what the fuck, josh? i'm in my mid-twenties."

he blinked at you. "there would be nothing wrong with you if you were a virgin in your mid-twenties."

"i'm not a virgin, joshua."

"right," he shook his head slightly. "sorry, i don't know. what were you saying?"

you chewed at your cheek nervously. "i just. i haven't… been with a guy in a really long time."

his eyes examined your face, looking for a hint at what you meant, because if it was only what you were saying, he didn't understand why you were so worried. "okay?"

"like, really long," you reiterated.

"baby, i promise," he said, forehead against yours. "i promise you, i don't care."

you exhaled sharply, wishing you could just enjoy things normal people did. that you knew what people wanted out of these encounters innately, instead of having to overthink them. "like, i don't want to… i don't know. disappoint you."

"disappoint me?" his head bobbed backwards in shock. "how the hell could i ever be disappointed when you're you?"

your eyes shut, grateful that he could still make you smile when you felt so out of your league. "i just mean that i-" you paused, trying to figure out how much you were willing to say, and how much you could without ruining whatever mood had been fostered here. "i just don't really do this. like, i feel like i don't know how."

"baby," he said, pressing his lips to yours briefly. "honey, sweetie, darling," he continued, punctuating each name with quick pecks. "you could starfish and i would have the time of my life."

you laughed, a hand landing on his shoulder sharply as he smiled at you. "okay, i'm not that bad, jesus."

"i'm telling you," he assured. "i don't care. i don't care if it's been months or years or forever, i don't care." he paused, appraising your expression. "we don't have to do anything. i'd be happy to just kiss you for an hour and a half if you're not ready."

"no," you whined, crinkling your nose. "it's not that, i just…" you took a breath. "i might just need you to take it a little slow."

"well, baby, you're in luck," he said, giving you a teasing smirk as his lips closed in on yours again. "slow and steady is exactly how i want you."

karol had said you hated men. she hadn't been wrong. you hated a lot of men, and how they made you feel like a prisoner in your own body. you hated the men you had encountered in your past, who made you feel small and weak. ugly and only wanted for one purpose, disrespecting your boundaries, your presentation, and your being. you hated those men, and nothing would ever redeem them for you.

joshua was different, though. he wasn't like them, because even though you didn't say explicitly why you needed a little extra care, he was more than prepared to give it to you. without even needing specific direction, he paid special attention to your reactions. to your body. he waited until you were ready, and asking him for more. and even when he sheepishly admitted that he'd started carrying a condom in his wallet the month prior, you could only giggle and silently be overwhelmingly thankful that he was truly nothing like any man you had ever been with before.

you swore you had made the same recipe you always did, but your curry tasted sweeter than you remembered. maybe it was just that you were eating it in your underwear with a man that made you feel comfortable in your skin for the first time in forever, a home improvement show remaining unwatched on your tv as the two of you joked together.

joshua woke the next morning in your empty bed, and was only confused for a second as he looked around your white walls. he stretched once, then sat up, eyes meandering over your orange patterned rug (one he remembered describing as "groovy" when he had first seen it, which had made you laugh in that way he adored), then noticed your laptop had been turned on. it was saturday, he realized, and you were likely going to edit today so you wouldn't have to tomorrow. he decidedly did not peek, though he wanted to, and peeked out your bedroom door instead.

you were easy to find, standing in your kitchen with an oversized shirt on and your hair pulled out of your face as you formed rice balls. you looked up from your work, smiling when you saw him, placing the triangle of rice you had just made on the cutting board. "good morning!"

it was, he thought. it was a really good morning.

you teased him for hugging you in your kitchen while he was only wearing underwear, saying that he seemed to have made himself comfortable quickly. he just playfully ran his hands under your shirt, saying, well, what about you, then? making breakfast with no pants on?

"i live here," you said, giggling and using your hip to bump him away. "i pay rent. what do you do?"

his eyes darted away from yours as he thought. "sit still, look pretty?"

that made you laugh. "you are very pretty."

he grinned, taking the opportunity to pull you into his chest again. "you, too."

he looked at what you had made, noticing the pot on the stove for the first time.

"soybean paste soup," you said, reacting to his gaze, then pointed at the neat triangles of brown tinted rice in front of you. "mushroom riceballs, and i'm making tamagoyaki next."

joshua blinked at you after processing everything. "do you do this every morning?"

"not every morning," you giggled. "but i wanted to today."

weeks later, you were biting your pinky nail to oblivion as you scrolled through comments on the video you had posted earlier that morning. you were sitting on the couch in joshua's living room, your laptop perched on the arm and your boyfriend fixing something to eat before the two of you sat to watch a movie. you had made a risky move in your video - one you thought would have been fine, but clearly people read more into it than you expected. joshua came over for dinner earlier in the week, when you had made pasta with all the delicious fresh seafood the two of you had found at a market the day before, accompanied by a simple salad and white wine. karol was working late, so you had set some aside for her, but that meant it was just you and joshua in frame when you filmed your usual table setting shot.

people were speculating.

you knew it was inevitable, and a few comments had pointed out the man that had eaten sushi with you in the vlog that included your first date, but at this point, the comments were flooded with questions and hypotheses on who the mystery man could be. most assumed boyfriend - which, while true, made you feel slightly annoyed - and a few wondered if he was your brother, or close friend, but they all noticed that his hands and voice had become regular guest stars on your channel. that, while you still got meals with krys and karol, this nameless, faceless man sat opposite you more often than anyone else.

the jeonju vlog is what sparked the most comments. people suspected some amount of intimacy when they realized this guy was travelling with you, too, and you probably would have thought the same if it had been someone you watched regularly. you had been careful with the editing, only including clips with food and the scenery shots that didn't star him (while you had filmed a lot that did, those were just for your own personal record), but you supposed it was in peoples' nature to try and find a romantic plotline in your slice of life.

"josh?" you said suddenly, pulling your pinky from between your teeth. you heard his vague noise of acknowledgment and spun around on the couch to watch as he cocked his head at you from the kitchen. "should we go public?"

"uh," he paused, looking at the scallion pancake he was cooking, quickly grabbing the panhandle to flip it. "give me, like, two minutes and we can discuss? i'm almost done in here."

you puffed your cheeks out and nodded, turning back towards your computer. "okay, baby."

when joshua came into the living room, the spread he had quickly put together across a tray you had bought for him (because you wanted it, mostly, but karol would kill you if you brought more home), he put it on the coffee table and sat next to you, quickly addressing the subject again.

"people keep," you paused. his eyebrows raised, prompting you, but he only chewed on his bottom lip to let you take your time as you hugged your knees to your chest. "people keep assuming you're my boyfriend anyways, so i'm just thinking-" you exhaled sharply. "should we just say fuck it? just confirm that we're a couple?"

joshua studied you. "you've always been pretty private."

you chewed your cheek, putting your lips against your knees. "that's on purpose."

"you don't have to say anything you don't want to," he reminded you, rubbing a hand against your back. you put your chin on your knees and gave him your biggest doe eyes, making him smile. "they can speculate all they want, but you don't owe them an explanation."

you nodded lightly as you hugged your legs and looked around, briefly studying the tray joshua had brought over. he had quickly stirfried some vegetables, grilled the frozen pork belly slices he always kept on hand, and even cooked your favorite premade scallion pancakes, the spread complete with several side dishes you had made together earlier in the week and two bowls of rice. your brows knit together, fingers itching to film how neatly he had put together a light meal for the two of you because you had said you wanted to show him your favorite movie without interruption, and he knew you would be hungry soon.

"would you-" you cleared your throat, looking up from the food and finding his eyes. "what do you think i should do?"

he let out a breathy laugh. "does it matter? you'll do what you want anyways."

you whined, pushing his shoulder as your feet dropped from the couch. "i'm serious, your opinion matters here. would you be okay with being public?"

"you're joking, right?" he laughed, adjusting his posture, and grabbing your hand to folding it between his. "baby, you know i care about you, right?"

your lips pursed as you nodded, looking between his eyes shyly.

"and you know i would never try to say that i, like, own you, right? like, i don't claim ownership over you as a person."

you let out a short laugh. "right."

he held your hand tighter. "i want to tell every viewer of every single one of your videos that you are mine."

your cheek puffed out as you smiled. "really?"

"especially the reply guys, oh my gosh," he rolled his eyes, making you laugh. "there's a place i think you'd like! i could take you, smiley face. yeah, get lost, creep. move along."

your palm landed on your cheek as you laughed. "shut up, are you serious?"

"you don't see those?" his eyes wide when you shook your head. "baby, there's so many people trying to take you out in the comments. so many."

you giggled, pressing your lips together. "well, there's only one guy that gets to."

"that's right," joshua said, a proud look on his face. "the ultimate reply guy fanboy."

you pushed his chest, laughing again. "shut up."

you decided an faq would do, but in the style of your regular videos. you definitely didn't want to just sit down in front of your camera and talk through questions and answers - that wasn't your style, and would feel wrong uploading. so instead, you spent a few hours compiling questions you had been asked often and organized them in a way that made sense, planning on showing your daily life. questions like what camera you used, what your go-to quick breakfast is, where you bought the clothes you liked - it was easy to plan them out to create a vague storyline of your standard day. you woke up on a wednesday (a day you went to the studio, because many of your questions were about what goes on there), excited to film but slightly nervous. as you set up your camera for breakfast, your phone buzzed on the counter.

joshie: good morning, baby! you got this! can't wait to see you tonight 🥰

you: 🥺🥺🥺 thank you!

the day went well, filming your planned clips on the subway and at the studio, and when your coworker asked what all the questions you were filming for were, you sighed.

"normal stuff," you said quickly, taking off your apron after several hours of cooking and shooting. "favorite recipes, what equipment i use… y'know."

yunhyeong nodded at you, his eyes squinting slightly. "is that all?"

he knew you. he knew how you reacted when you were nervous. how you could practically hide it from anyone, but that certain subjects would always make your eyes look slightly panicked and your speech speed up. the worst part is that you knew he knew, and your facade was almost immediately broken.

"and if i have a boyfriend."

he stared at you for a second before he laughed in disbelief. it took him over a week of bugging you about the guy in your videos before you admitted you were seeing someone, and even then, you only did because joshua had started picking you up from the studio and - against your wishes - introduced himself to your coworkers. yunhyeong thought about how protective you were of your privacy, and how you had never revealed something as personal as a relationship online before - partly because none of the people you had gone on two or three dates with had been serious enough to reveal, but he mostly thought about how you barely even showed your own face. that you stayed mostly silent when you filmed, and if you had to speak, it was a voice that was only adjacent to your usual cadence, as if you were trying to create another barrier between you and your online persona. how you had mourned your grandfather's passing and uploaded your vlog like normal two days later, but called out of work for the week following.

"and you're telling the truth?"

you exhaled, wiping down the stove top now that it had cooled. "yeah, shua and i discussed it. people are speculating, anyways, and it's not like he's going anywhere any time soon."

yunhyeong nodded again, organizing the spices as he put them away. "i'm happy for you."

you looked at him. "what do you mean?"

"it's a big step," he said, purposefully keeping his eyes from you so you didn't get self conscious. "you haven't been this serious about someone the entire time i've known you. i think it's really great that you found someone you care about."

you watched him spin bottles to be label out as you considered his words. "thanks."

he peeked at you, smiling. "of course."

yunhyeong's words rattled in your mind as you walked to the restaurant joshua had agreed to meet you at, filming your feet as you went with the intention of answering a few random questions with on-screen text in the edit. someone you care about.

you thought about how joshua had said the same thing about you when you had asked if going public was something he would be comfortable with. the way it has made your heart flutter. you wondered, briefly, if perhaps this was something more than just caring.

when you were editing the video that saturday, you procrastinated on the last question as long as you could, and when it was the only thing left to do, you escaped to the kitchen to make lunch in favor of finishing the part that was haunting you. your bagel sandwich was delicious, but you could barely enjoy it, mind clouded by the task that made your anxiety peak for seemingly no good reason.

it took you too long to finish it.

when you showed it to joshua, wanting his blessing before you uploaded, he couldn't hide his giddy reaction.

"it's okay?" you confirmed, studying his face.

he nodded at you, lips pushed together into a lopsided smile. "it's really cute."

"cute?" you asked, clicking through the video. "that's good, right?"

"yes," he laughed, squeezing your shoulder to put a kiss on your head. "it's great. post it."

so you did. and while you had gotten a tiny bump when krys excitedly dragged the two of you onto her stream that afternoon, you had no way of predicting the way the rest of the internet picked it up a few weeks later.

"r/relationshipgoals," jeonghan read off his phone, leaning against your kitchen island along with several of your friends that had come over when they saw the two of you on their newsfeeds unprompted. "'cross post from r/cutecouples, the most heartwarming boyfriend reveal you'll see this year.'"

"twitter, too," karol announced looking up from her own phone, seated in a barstool beside him. "you're a twitter moment. people found the clip from krys' stream, even."

you were on the counter opposite them, kicking your feet nervously to the beat in your head as you chewed your lip. you sighed and covered your face. "how long is this gonna last?"

"a while, hopefully," krys said, turning your laptop screen towards you. "your subcounts are insane right now."

you whined into your hands, making joshua appear at your side to put a hand on your spine. you took a breath at the touch, relaxing your tensed thighs on the counter. "it's okay to be nervous," he muttered at you. "but it's also kinda exciting, right?"

you exhaled deeply, letting your hands fall and your eyes trail to his before a smile broke on your face. "kinda."

so after you calmed yourself down, you managed to go through some of the posts about you, and you surprised yourself by letting them put a smile on your face. even the idea of having a public relationship had scared you shitless less than a month prior, but this… this wasn't so bad. seeing twitter repost the same video of you filming your feet as you walked into a restaurant, panning the camera up to reveal joshua sitting at a table and waving excitedly at you. the cuts you made to show clips that had landed on the cutting room floor of past videos - the footage you had taken of him pointing out the new wok you had started using a few weeks prior in a kitchen specialty store, and the goofy face he revealed after holding it in front of himself as he brought it back to you. the video of joshua grasping your hand, panning up to his playfully serious face as he dragged you down a boardwalk in jeonju, gesturing to the sunset. the unedited audio from your first date, when you had said something about it looking really good, and he had said something along the lines of how it would have been a waste if you hadn't recorded, and the two of you giggled together in a way that nervous new couples did. short bits of you swinging your camera around to reveal a laughing joshua as you tried to film quiet shots. a clip of him wearing a triangular menu on his head like a hat, acting as though it was completely normal.

you had a hard time believing anything you ever did would be viral-worthy, but even you had to admit, this was a pretty understandable thing for you to go viral for.

besides, it felt like it made sense for this to be the one thing about your personal life that ended up getting attention. it felt like he was an innate part of you at this point, and that you wouldn't be honest if you hid him.

it was august when he broke your heart.

"how could you?" you asked him, staring in disbelief. "you haven't seen lord of the rings?"

"okay, i lied," joshua said, still washing the dishes. "i saw them when i was a kid, but i don't remember them really."

"well, we're fixing that."

he looked at where you were sitting on his kitchen island - a well known habit of yours at this point. "today?"

"not today," you said, poking your toe at his hip. "this weekend, maybe? if we start now, we'll be watching til you go to work tomorrow morning."

he shut off the faucet and gingerly placed the pan he had just washed on the drying rack. "how many movies is it? i thought it was just three."

"it is," you said, laughing at his shocked look. "the extended editions are around four hours each."

joshua exhaled, leaning against the counter as he used a cloth to dry his hands. "you're lucky i like wasting hours with you."

you grinned, hopping down from your seat. "you're lucky i let you."

and that weekend, the two of you did just that - waste time, ordering delivery food for two meals as you camped out on the couch in various positions as the two of you got comfortable repeatedly. you couldn't help but recite specific lines, mouthing along with every word gandalf said like you had thought of the words yourself. you pointed out behind the scenes facts along the way, even, excitedly saying viggo broke two toes when he kicked that helmet, or how faramir's flames were a mirror trick. joshua watched you, because while he knew it was your favorite movie and he really should pay attention, he couldn't help but get distracted by his own favorite movie, and it starred you getting excited about something you loved.

you slept later than joshua that sunday, and when you emerged from the bedroom, you spotted krys sitting at the island with a plate of waffles in front of her, then found joshua leaned against the counter with a cup of coffee. he smiled when he saw you.

"i made breakfast," he said, gesturing to the counter.

you looked around at the spread as you walked over to him. waffles, fruit, bacon, and the promise of a fried egg upon request - a spread worthy of your own brunching standards. "what about second breakfast?" you asked quietly, in accented english.

joshua laughed, his arm wrapping around your midsection as you came over to kiss him good morning. "elevensies?" he shot back, in the same vague accent.

you broke your serious face to giggle. "luncheon?"

"alright," krys said, voice raised in annoyance when the two of you looked over at her. "i get it, y'all are in love or whatever, but can you have some respect for those of us who are lonely?"

you rolled your eyes, laughing at the fact that she had absolutely brought this upon herself by forcing the two of you together every chance she got, but joshua went cold when he heard her say the thing he had been thinking for a while, but was too scared to say out loud. the thing he felt when you grabbed his arm and told him that if he wouldn't let you carry the ring, then you could at least carry him with all the same dramatics as one samwise gamgee did. when you cried as frodo and bilbo sailed into the sunset for good, even though you had seen it a million times over. the sneaking thought that he was in love with you, but didn't know how to say so. he swallowed down the thought, shaking his head when you raised a questioning brow at him as you dished up a plate of waffles and fruit.

it didn't take you long to trust joshua enough to give him your door code so he could let himself in, but it took him a while to actually use it. he said something about not wanting to intrude, but you told him it was more intrusive to make you come to the door when you could possibly be doing important things and he was completely capable of getting in on his own.

"babe?"

you hissed. you had the thought right before you started this boss battle, that he would arrive before you finished and you would be trapped at your computer. you were right. "in here! gimme like two minutes!"

you heard him enter your room, and his bubbly laugh when he spotted your back at your desk desperately clicking your mouse and striking your keyboard. "wow, is this what you meant by important things?"

"please, please, please," you whined, intermittently squealing as you reacted to the enemy attacks. "i'll get off in a second i just need one more cleansing heart to ascend xin- fuck! not the stupid birds!"

he laughed again, his hand finding the back of your shoulder, thumbs pressing into the constantly sore flesh. you winced as he kneaded his fingers into your shoulder but exhaled, making him laugh lightly when you got knocked over by a boar. "hey, there's a boar there."

"yes, thank you, joshua." you quickly cracked a knuckle as soon as you had down time, sticking your neck out as he continued to massage your shoulders. "i think i have two more waves."

"waves? because it's a water level?"

you groaned into a reluctant laugh. "no shitty jokes right now, i'm trying to focus. normally krys and i co-op this one but she was busy."

he hummed, moving to stand next to you with his hand resting at the base of your neck. "wonder what she was doing."

"don't you live with her?" you teasingly asked, glancing up at him for the first time while sprinting across the platform, your game camera spinning uncontrollably when you suddenly pulled both hands to your mouth and gasped. "what the fuck, joshua?"

he stifled a grin, but it was completely obvious in his eyes as you stared up at him, blonde hair curled lightly to stay out of his face. "what's up?"

you stood from your chair, inspecting his head. "what the fuck?"

he laughed, wrapping his arms around you when you ran your fingers through his bleached locks hesitantly. "do you hate it?"

"i-" you blinked at him repeatedly. "what? no, i don't hate- what the fuck, joshua?"

"what?" he whined, eyebrows tenting at you even though his lips were still smiling. "does it not suit me?"

you held his head and squinted at him. "josh, you're hot. you look hot. but what the fuck?"

he laughed, finally planting his hello kiss on your lips. he watched the gears turn behind your eyes, puckered lips becoming a pout.

"did you go to a salon?"

he grinned. "krys did it."

you made a fist at him, scrunching your face for a second as you exhaled, looking down at the screen right as your last team member died, respawning at a statue. "that's why she used so many smiley faces when she said she was busy."

he put his lips to your cheek, smiling into your skin. "not bad though, right? you got a pretty handsome boyfriend."

and while you would have loved to roll your eyes and tease him, you were overtaken by a giggle as you turned your head towards him again, the tip of his nose gliding across your cheek. "yeah, i do."

his eyebrows went up. "wow, wasn't expecting you to admit it so readily."

you laughed, a light, carefree laugh, your palms on his jaw as you kissed him. "i have eyes, joshua." he just smiled against your lips, lacing his fingers together behind your tailbone, and you pulled away slightly to look up at his hair again. your hands went to his nape, fingertips against his scalp. "how long did it take? you have thick hair."

"we did three sessions," he said. "enjoy it while you can, it might fall out."

you laughed with him, brushing your fingers gently in his bangs again. "it feels fine, though?"

"yeah, i made this incredible discovery that i'm almost positive i'm the first to hear about it. it's called a hair treatment."

you batted at his chest, giggling. "shut up."

"make me," he said, the sweet smile on his lips making the phrase more playful than suggestive.

"i can't believe you surprised me with bleached hair," you said, plopping into your seat and exiting the game. "you know i hate surprises, right?"

"that's too bad," he said, his hand returning to rub against your neck. "i like surprises a lot. get used to them."

you puffed out your cheeks, sighing slowly. "usually people compromise."

"not on this," he stated. "i'm a gift giver."

"yeah, i figured that out when you got flowers sent to the studio on our one month anniversary, then again on our second, then here on our third…"

he was just smiling smugly at you when you stood again, maneuvering around him. "and you love getting them?"

you rolled your eyes, not even commenting when he playfully patted your butt as you went by. "they're always tasteful and it's nice to have some seasonal flowers for the counter."

"so you love them," he repeated. "because it sounds to me like you love them."

you laughed, reaching out to catch his hand in yours and pull him along with you as you exited to the main living area. "and what if i do? so what, joshua hong, if it makes my heart beat a little fast when we suddenly get flowers delivered and i realize it's the fourteenth? are you gonna call me a hypocrite because i vocally advocate that traditional chivalry is bullshit?"

he just listened to your playful accusation, more proving that you were self aware rather than egging him on. "no way," he said plainly. "you can still think traditional chivalry is bullshit, it won't stop me from trying to make you smile."

you felt your face heating up, your jaw dropping slightly to let out an annoyed huff. "cheesy, joshua. i'm offended."

"want me to make it worse?" he asked, wrapping his arms around your waist.

your hands landed on his chest as you squinted at his grin. "i'm scared."

he gave you a crooked grin. "happy one hundred days. i brought sushi."

your head whipped over to the counter, spotting the paper bag with a familiar logo. "from nori table?"

"of course, from nori table."

joshua had promised jeonghan that you would make an appearance as a couple at a party he was throwing the next day, and you found yourself almost nervous. you got on with jeonghan famously - almost enough to drive joshua insane - and you even warmed up to seokmin pretty quickly, but from what you had been told, jeonghan enjoyed partying, and you didn't really like getting drunk.

"you made it!" seokmin grinned big, spreading his arms to signal for you to let him wrap you in a hug. you laughed and greeted him, enjoying the friendly comfort, then watching him hug joshua after he let you go. "and you're blonde! life's good?"

"yeah," joshua said, making eye contact with you briefly as his fingers tangled with yours. "life's good. you?"

seokmin blinked before he said "yeah, good!" and your brow knit slightly before you consciously adjusted your face to hide the analysis of his hesitation happening behind your eyes. "this is your first time here, right?"

you nodded, smiling and following him as he led you into the crowded apartment. "yeah, it's been busy lately. but i finally made it to one!"

"well, you need to meet my friends," he said, continuously looking back at you even as he walked ahead, towards a corner of the living room. "you're gonna love them."

"aye, josh!"

you looked to the source of the call, spotting the guy pulling himself to his feet from his seat on the couch, arms wide in greeting to your boyfriend.

"hey, hosh," joshua said, a sideways grin on and his brows tented as he gave him a quick handshake into a hug. quickly, he put a hand on your opposite shoulder, pulling you towards him and quickly introducing you.

soonyoung initially went in for a hug after your introduction, but immediately noticed the way your eyes widened slightly and instantly pulled his arms down, leaving a hand extended for you to shake. you laughed, taking it, and apologized for not being a hugger.

"no worries," soonyoung laughed, and you wondered if he was always this pink in the face or if he had already started drinking. "seokmin will hug me, right?"

"everyone!" seokmin ignored him, pulling you towards the people gathered on and around the couch. he announced you to his friends then quickly went down the line - soonyoung, seungkwan, jihoon, dongmin, yugyeom - you repeated the names back to him like you would remember all of them, even though you knew you wouldn't unless they became regulars in your life, too.

jeonghan flitted by and expressed his greetings to you both some time later, intending to abscond with joshua for drinks and conversation elsewhere, but he stopped jeonghan from pulling him away before he put a hand on your elbow, looking at you meaningfully.

"i'll be okay," you told him, smiling. "go ahead."

he squinted at you. "you sure?"

"seokmin's here," you reminded him, nodding your head at the boy you had practically adopted as your own brother. "real quick, about soonyoung-"

he quirked an eyebrow at you. "what about him?"

you chewed your lip, smiling. "karol's been a little too focused on work lately, right?"

his eyes widened, thinking about your roommate. his eyes went to the man you had referenced, who was currently chanting something into seungkwan's face as he rolled his eyes. "karol?"

"what do you think?" you asked, looking back at soonyoung.

he blinked. "i think he'll drive her insane."

your eyes shone at him. "i think she'll love it."

he laughed incredulously, registering that you had asked his opinion instead of just doing whatever pleased you, and he wondered if that meant you trusted him. "you're right," he said finally. "try it."

"of course i'm right," you said, giggling against the quick peck he put on your lips. "remove him, jeonghan."

"finally," an impatient host shot back, rolling his eyes in a way that landed in a sly smile at you. "for what it's worth, i think your plan will work."

"didn't need your approval, but i'll take it," you said, smiling smugly at him. "i'll update you later."

the update you gave the next time you saw him, weeks later, was that karol had left the apartment every week since to go be with soonyoung somewhere fun and exciting, and you waved her off with a shiteating grin every week, culminating in the two of them arriving to krys' birthday party hand in hand.

jeonghan laughed, stealing a carrot stick from your cutting board as you arranged them into a rainbow themed charcuterie platter. "knew it. soonyoung loves women stronger than him."

you looked at him as he took a bite. "and karol loves someone she can take care of."

"look at us," he said, waving the half eaten carrot between the two of you with a lopsided grin on his face. "what a duo. we should hang out more. fuck joshua."

you laughed at him, then at the offended look on your boyfriend's face as he walked past. "now?" you asked eyebrows raised as you looked at him expectantly, and he laughed when he realized what the last words out of jeonghan's mouth were seconds before.

"please, this is a child's birthday party," he reminded you, and you laughed at the overexaggerated look he gave you to sell the joke.

you looked over to where krys was laughing with seokmin, soonyoung, and karol, then back down to your work as you nudged around quartered figs with a vague smile on. "seems like the kids are having a nice time."

jeonghan sighed, falling dramatically against the counter. "oh, to be young and in love."

joshua laughed. "karol's our age."

his cheek was planted in his palm, elbow on the counter as he gazed after the group. "i'm talking about seokmin and krys."

"what?" joshua asked, voice nearly cracking, and you let out an explosive laugh. "seokmin and who?"

"stop acting stupid," jeonghan waved ahand at him, then popping his eyes up to catch your look of solidarity. he pointed at you. "see? we're on the same page, which means we're right."

joshua looked at you and you raised your hands in surrender. "are you serious?" he asked. "my sister and-"

you landed a hand on his face, effectively shutting him up as you giggled. "shush, josh. just leave it, okay?"

"good idea," jeonghan sighed, straightening and picking up the platter you had finished. "dining table?"

"please," you responded, looking back and giggling when joshua looked just as dumbfounded as he had before you looked away. "she's an adult. seokmin's a good guy. let it happen."

he closed his mouth, stealing a glance at his sister. "he is a kindergarten teacher."

"and both your best friend and your partner love him," you reminded him. "she could do worse."

he gave you a look. "she has done worse."

"shut up," you said, pushing his shoulder in your friend's defense. "you've done pretty bad, too."

his eyes went to the ceiling, remembering the accidental altercation you had been forced to have with one of his more regrettable exes. "how many times do i have to apologize-"

"you don't," you laughed, putting your hands on his cheeks and focusing his eyes on yours. "but krys is an adult. she's allowed to judge her own partners, and even if she ends up being wrong, she's old enough to make her own mistakes."

joshua huffed, knowing you were right but not wanting to admit it. "sorry i'm trying to protect my one and only baby sister."

"yes, and you're adorable," you assured him. "best big brother ever. but it's her birthday, and if you don't start getting drunk soon, she'll be very upset."

drinking with joshua was fun. because he wasn't much different than yourself - he didn't get crazy, he didn't get loud. he just got loose. he let stupider jokes out, and he was more willing to join in on krys' performative comedy bits throughout the night. you found yourself falling onto a couch with him, giggling as he caught his breath after a particularly involved musical number.

the most fun you had drinking with joshua was in itaewon, long past midnight but still what you considered halloween. you had been dragging karol with you for years, but now you had a boyfriend, and she had a boyfriend, and you both had a new joint best friend, so it only made sense for you to get them all take the train ride out to your favorite part of seoul.

ratatouille. that was the only way you could get joshua to go with you. he wanted a couples costume and he wanted you to be the rat.

"this feels backhanded," you told him.

"do you want to be linguine?" he asked. "i can be sexy remy. i can find grey hot pants, but you have to be the one to attach the the tail because i have no idea what my butt looks like."

you laughed, resigning to your fate and buying the outfit online, then looked at him suddenly. "liar. i know you check yourself out at the gym."

"okay," he said, eyes on the ceiling as he herded a giggling you into his arms. "then… i want it to be accurate, so you need to attach it directly at my tailbone." he cocked his head at you after you settled into the hug. "i have to be wearing them, obviously."

"obviously," you said. "but unfortunately, i already ordered the body suit."

josh pressed his lips together and made a quick fist in victory. "awesome. i-i mean! aww, well, that's fine, i suppose." he sighed dramatically, convincing absolutely no one that he hadn't wanted this outcome all along. "i'll be linguine."

"i don't feel like fighting a bunch of gays in itaewon for your affection anyways," you said, making him laugh and kiss your cheek quickly before pulling away.

"grilled cheese?"

"is that even a question?"

it wasn't a question when you were weaving through throngs of bunnies and angels, either, holding hands with both him and his sister to not lose them in the crowd, karol and soonyoung trailing behind krys, all five of you on a mission to get carbs in you after starting the night off nearly too strong.

halloween in itaewon was different. it was special, you thought. you usually didn't like crowds, but this one felt good. halloween wasn't a celebrated holiday in korea, but with internet, influencers, and immigrants, the culture found its way into the new age scene. you loved an excuse to celebrate your favorite characters by paying them homage, and joshua had thought that was a noble enough reason for him to justify staying up too late and drinking too much.

you had just left the diner themed bar that you devoured griddle top sandwiches from, as well as another drink, and you spotted a familiar angel making a beeline for you.

well, not you.

"how many times have i tried to get you to come to itaewon with me?" jeonghan asked, pushing joshua's shoulder as soon as he could reach it.

joshua laughed, looking shocked by the sudden appearance of his friend. "you never agreed to be remy!"

jeonghan looked at you, and burst into laughter, making your jaw drop in indignance and whacking your fist against both their arms. "at least we're original. way to put in the effort, han."

he shrugged bringing a straw to his mouth, and you eyed the pink liquid that had clearly been funnelled into a water bottle. "i look better than all these clowns and you know it."

"there you are!"

jeonghan spun, the straw still in his mouth. "shit, i haven't lost you?"

seokmin gave him a sarcastic laugh, adjusting the shoulder of his soccer jersey as he walked up behind him, quickly adding to your small circle as he greeted you and joshua. you stepped aside suddenly, revealing the members of your party that had been lagging behind. "o-oh! it's all of you!"

you made brief eye contact with joshua, who was trying to not laugh at your less than subtle attempt. "you match!" you said quickly, pointing out that krys was dressed as a baseball player. "baseball, soccer," you trailed off, looking around for help.

"sports couple," jeonghan said loudly, slipping you a quick look. "cute."

soonyoung had to put his entire palm over his mouth to stop himself from exploding into giggles when seokmin went red in the ears and krys tried to change the subject as kindly as she could manage.

when you finally made it back into joshua's room, it was far too late (early? you could think about it more, but you preferred resigning to the fact that the passage of time was beyond you and moving on), the sun already starting to light the sky as it prepared to break the horizon. when you stole his toque of his head, he put his hand on your waist, backing you up against the closet door and gently working his lips onto yours.

you giggled, your arms landing on his shoulders. "aren't you tired?

"yeah, but," his eyes fluttering over your face. "i just really like you."

you were smiling when he pressed his lips to yours again. "i really like you, too, but we've been at a sweaty block party all night and we need to shower."

"together?" he asked, a spot of childish hope in his voice. "singular shower?"

you sighed on his lips, playfully threading your fingers against his nape. "if you want?"

the hot water felt especially good after trekking home in the cold without a jacket. and even though it was just meant to be a shower, he kept kissing you like it was something more, pressing you against the tiled wall and running his hands all over your shape. you couldn't stop giggling. pushing his hands away, saying you need to wash up, but giving him looks like you wanted him to keep going. you were running your hands over his chest, rinsing away suds, when joshua couldn't help but put a hand at the base of your neck, tipping your head slightly to deepen an already heated kiss.

"cut it out," you muttered against his lips, feeling them curve despite your eyes staying shut.

"cut what out?"

you looked at him, barely processing anything other than how incredibly handsome he was, even with his lashes stuck together with moisture and his hair slicked back against his head. "trying to fuck me in a shower stall."

he laughed teasingly, leaning into you again. "then why'd you agree to come in here with me?"

your back hit the tile again, and you giggled. "to save water."

and then he's kissing you again, a hand steady on your nape as he worked you open, tongue lapping against yours with a desperation that could only mean one thing. you whimpered dumbly, the squeaky whine escaping you with no difficulty as your hands ran up his chest, your grip longing for any amount of him you could get.

his lips leave you abruptly, asking if this was too much. if you wanted to stop. but you shook your head at him, hands eager to feel more of his shoulders, his neck, his scalp, despite your legs starting to give out. steam drifted between you when you told him your legs felt like jello from your full shift of partying, and if he didn't want to hold you up, you should probably take this to bed.

you were giggling as you frantically dried each other off, stealing kisses that were far too deep to be so short and longing touches that could have been interpreted as purposeful drying if you squinted hard enough, but felt much more like careful teasing. his hands felt right running up your body, and your hair was still damp, but that didn't bother either of you when you fell into bed together.

"i cant believe you want to fuck me when i was dressed like a literal rat," you teased.

he laughed, tugging your thigh up on his hip as his nose nuzzled against yours. "a sexy rat."

you giggled, lips parting when he kissed you. "a rat from a pixar movie."

he didn't miss a beat. "a sexy rat from a pixar movie."

you roll your damn eyes at him, and he just laughs, knowing that it mattered very little what you were wearing before, because now you were bare, clean, and safe in his bed, which was exactly where he wanted you for the rest of forever.

the sun was past its peak when you woke, stretching your sore spine and legs with joshua's arm draped over you. his hand seemed to wake before he did, finding your hip and squeezing gently as he took in his signature first breath of the day.

"g'morning." you smiled at his soft voice as he squinted at you, and you rolled into him to plant a kiss on his lips.

"it's almost two," you said finally.

he groaned, burying his face in the pillow. "too early." his grip around you tightened, making you giggle. "nap time."

you whined. "i wanna make coffee before it gets too late."

"i said nap time," he muttered, face still against the pillow.

"baby, i have a headache."

his head popped up, squinting at the bedside. "there's water."

you laughed incredulously. "i need caffeine."

he just pulled you tighter. "i need you here."

"wow," you said, wrapping your arms around him as he snuggled into your chest. "would rather i suffer from a caffeine headache for your own selfish need to cuddle than let me escape for two minutes to make a coffee and come back?"

he smiled, rubbing his cheek against your sternum. "mhmm."

you giggled, carding your fingers through his hair and resigning to a few more precious moments of uninterrupted snuggling before you could relieve the vague aching in your temples.

he did eventually let you slip out of his grasp, and you asked if he wanted a coffee, too, to which he just blearily blinked at you and nodded once. you laughed, finding a shirt in a drawer and pulling it over your head before exiting to the kitchen.

you hit the kettle first, having a craving for a hot cup of coffee rather than the usual iced, grabbing a mug and glass from a cabinet. the espresso machine sat on the long counter against the windowed outer wall, and your eyes danced across the outside world as you made the two coffees. when you returned to the bedroom, joshua was on his phone, and when you cleared your throat, he dropped his phone on the pillow and pretended to be asleep, complete with a loud snore.

you giggled, sitting on the edge of the bed and nudging him carefully. "get up or i'll put the glass on your neck."

he winced at the idea. "evil," he stated plainly, flopping around to comfortably sit up and taking the iced coffee from you.

you sipped your coffee and put it on the bedside table to swing your feet back under the covers. you shoved at the pillows to support your back as you sat, grabbing your coffee and phone to begin your weekend morning routine of checking the news as you sipped at an americano. "i brought you coffee in bed at two pm. i think i'm pretty saintly."

he gave you a fake laugh, making you giggle and push your foot against his leg under the covers in a half hearted kick. "is that why you said 'oh, god' so much last night?"

you groaned. "gross, joshua. and for the record," you said, eyeing him slyly as a smile broke out on your lips. "that was this morning."

"time is an illusion," he declared, taking a gulp from his coffee and setting it down to get more comfortable beside you as you began to read an article. "are we doing anything today?"

you shook your head, eyes still focused on your screen. "nada."

"nothin'?" joshua fished.

"zilch," you concluded.

"rad," he decided, a light tone in his voice as he grabbed his phone to resume whatever he had been doing before you returned. "do you wanna order breakfast?"

you let out a breath, your head falling back as you looked at him. "yes, oh my god."

he laughed, and his eyes ran over your face in a way you recognized well at this point. to you, it was him just smiling back at you, and you liked that it reached his eyes. but to him, it was the way he looked at you when he was memorizing all the little reasons he adored you, and it was getting harder for him to pretend it wasn't more than just simple adoration.

"question," he started, eyes darting away from yours as he licked his suddenly dry lips and swallowed quickly.

"pasta," you said immediately, pulling your phone to your chest as you gave him your biggest, most convincing eyes before a finger came up to demonstrate a point. "and before you say that's not a breakfast food, i would like to remind you that it is 2pm and i had to sit through a hundred of your italian food puns yesterday despite ratatouille being set in france."

he laughed, and you gave him a confused look. "we can get pasta, but that wasn't the question."

your eyebrow quirked. "what other question could you possibly ask me right now?"

unknowingly, joshua let his face settle into the same look he was giving you less than a minute earlier. "would you want to move in?"

your eyes ran over his face repeatedly, trying to register how serious he was as you considered the idea of staying in this comforting bed and presence for the indefinite future, and even you couldn't hide how nice that sounded. the only thing stopping you was that you couldn't bear to leave karol alone. you had been living together for over four years now, she had been your first roommate in korea, your best friend for years, and an inexplicable source of quiet but understanding comfort for you.

"i understand," joshua assured you, placing his hand over yours after you expressed your hesitation. "i don't know what i'll do with myself when krys decides to move out."

you nodded, studying his face but mind wandering to other things. "krys," you hummed, and he eyed you.

"what genius plan is that brain brewing?"

you shook your head, brushing the thought out of your mind - the thought that krys had said something about needing to find a new place soon. the thought that she had said she was never gonna properly grow up when josh was taking care of her, whether she wanted him to or not. "nothing."

but it wasn't nothing. it was a compromise - you and krys would swap leases.

"are you sure?" you asked her, elbows on the island as krys ate the donuts you had anxiously made that morning. you had brought up the idea to her days before, and she excitedly agreed, but something about it felt too easy to you.

"yes," she assured you, wiping her bottom lip clear of powdered sugar. "i swear, i'm sure. how many times do i have to say it?"

you chewed your cheek. "i don't want you to feel like i'm kicking you out."

"you're not kicking me out," she said matter of factly. "i'm moving out. it just happens to be the same day as you're moving in."

you pouted. "and you're moving into my apartment."

"yeah," she said, nodding. "i get to pay lower rent and have south facing windows in my room. i should feel bad about kicking you out."

it took almost a month to organize everything, but by early december you were just waiting for the date. you purposefully scheduled for a weekend, in order to not disrupt krys' streaming schedule and your video uploads, since you had planned to do a separate moving vlog about safely packing tableware. the weekend before, krys came over to her soon-to-be home for your usual monthly brunch.

flipping pancakes that day felt a little somber, knowing it was the last time you'd be cooking brunch while living with karol. you had been with her for four years, and it felt surreal that you were finally parting ways like this. not only that, but you were moving in with a guy. the idea itself scared the shit out of you - cohabitating with someone other than karol. you'd be sharing a room. sharing a kitchen. sharing all of your space - normally, that would scare you away from agreeing, but something about joshua made you feel safe. he made you feel like you would never try to get back the distance you generally held so dear.

months ago, the idea of sharing space like that while trying to decompress would be unimaginable, but recently, you found alone time with joshua just as healing as alone time with yourself, so the idea of being able to snuggle into his side every night actually put a warm feeling in your stomach. you looked at your friends, who were laughing and drinking bloody marys as you tried to keep up with their conversation. your brain swirled, and you looked back down at the strawberries you were cutting, suddenly realizing you had never felt that way about a boy before.

"woah, you okay, babe?" krys bobbed her head downwards to check your face. "are you crying? i thought only onions did that to you."

you threw your head back, sniffling noisily trying to force the tears back under your ducts. karol stood. "oh, my god, what's wrong?" she frantically put down her drink and rushed around the counter to your side.

"wait, yeah-" krys shook her head rapidly, then reached over to take the knife out of your hand, her face creasing into a worried pout. "what's going on?"

you gathered yourself, embarrassed at how quickly you had cried so hard over such a stupid realization. you almost laughed, realizing what a scene you were making. you never cried. you weren't even sure either of them had seen it before now, yet you were ugly sobbing over something that they all probably already knew.

you swallowed harshly, clearing your throat. "i think i'm in love with josh."

krys and karol always knew you didn't truly care about the gender of your hypothetical partner, but that you had avoided men for a reason other than your attraction to them. they knew you gravitated towards women for practically your entire friendships with either of them, they knew that you never liked to get genuinely drunk and instead took care of the rest of them, and they knew you had never been very interested in sex. these were all known facts about you, and your friends understood that you kept the reasons for these facts close to your chest. they respected that.

but you finally wanted to share why. and the why was your ex.

when you had imagined telling your closest friends about your trauma, this certainly wasn't the situation you expected - crowded around the kitchen counter as your pancakes went cold, and only because you had burst into tears. it wasn't the right place, you thought, for you to talk about how he got you drunk. how you were practically asleep. how you tried to push him away but your body was weak with intoxication and you were powerless against him. someone you trusted. someone you loved.

you had always been the type to fight your own battles. you could stand up for yourself without difficulty, yet he made you scared of men. of what they could do to you. he reminded you that despite your effort to air on the androgynous, you had a body that some people might enjoy against your will. he made you want to hide everything about you and your body, wearing baggy shirts and oversized hoodies every chance you got, avoiding the unwanted gaze of men.

but recently, you've been wearing shorts more. you cropped some old shirts you never got use out of anymore to wear to your weekly yoga class. you had even bought a schoolgirl outfit for exactly one purpose, which had been entirely out of your comfort zone until roughly two months prior, but you had happily worn to please a man.

but in your defense, joshua hong was not like most men.

his appreciation of your body never felt predatory, and it always felt like it was bested by his appreciation of your mind. he didn't treat you like a prize, or like you were his for the taking. he appreciated your body as yours. while you may have found yourself the subject of his desire, you were never an object, and it had been a long time since you had felt comfortable wearing the clothes you liked in favor of opting for whatever would hide the most skin.

krys was crying. karol was too, but she was more focused on hugging you tight as you wiped off the tears that had trailed down your face. krys rounded the counter, loudly vocalising how much she loved you and everything about you, and you laughed out loud as she let out an exaggerated wail.

"actually, though," she said, pulling away slightly and sniffling. "drop the address. we're rolling up on this guy tomorrow."

you laughed again, wiping at your face when your arms were free. "wouldn't even know where to find him now."

"good!" karol declared. "fuck that guy! cut him out! you're a bad bitch!"

krys pouted. "i'm really happy josh helped you heal."

you stared at her for a second, registering that she must have been right. you eyes swam over the counter, thinking about all the times he had helped you feel more comfortable with yourself. with everything. enough to let someone in. enough to love. "i guess that's what this is, huh?"

karol cleared her throat. "so, you love him."

a grin broke out on krys' face, and your eyes immediately rolled. "you love him."

"you love him so bad."

"you wanna marry him and make adorable little hong babies."

"oh my god," you said, pressing the backs of your hands into your eye sockets, annoyed laughter on your lips as they bounced off each other. "you guys suck."

joshua started acting… odd. that was the only way you could describe it. there was nothing specific you could name - maybe the way his eyes were moving slightly too quickly from side to side? or maybe it was the way he inhaled a little extra when you asked him what was up, only for him to push his lips into an exaggerated pout and insist that nothing was. whatever it was, it made you watch him a little bit longer, your eyes squinting slightly more than usual.

you called him the day before, asking if you could bring some stuff over in hopes of making the next day as easy as possible, but his response was quick and surprising.

"what do you mean, no?" you laughed, putting down the wooden tray you were deciding the fate of. "do you have a girl over?"

you could hear him faltering on the other end. "and what if i did?"

"good luck getting her to make you breakfast."

he laughed. "i'm kidding. i have a guy over."

"oh?" you asked. "jeonghan?"

"shut up," he chuckled out. "i'm having something installed, but it was supposed to be a surprise."

"joshua," you reminded him, thinking of what the hell he could have meant by something. "i don't do surprises."

"you do now."

you groaned, a palm landing on your counter. "what is it?"

"a sex swing," he said plainly, as though that were the most obvious fact that you could have questioned, and you practically choked on your laughter, not even letting him confirm that he was joking before you were folded over your counter. and quite frankly, you could not wait another day to let him make you laugh like that as a routine.

you finally seceded, but you were glad when joshua arrived - the suv he rented loaded with krys' things - because it was a signifier that the distance between you and said surprise was shrinking quickly. soonyoung had become a surprisingly helpful voice of reason as you went through your piles of tablewares, telling you which ones to leave behind and which ones to take with you. seokmin had even arrived not long after the suv in his own car, a few brightly colored belongings in his backseat. you and karol exchanged a look when you realized he had volunteered to help krys move, but said nothing out loud, knowing she would do nothing but deny the obvious.

after yours and krys' affects were swapped in the car, you looked around one last time before telling josh you thought that was it.

"wait!" krys faltered, realizing she didn't have a good reason to stop you. "i- uh,"

"they know there's a surprise waiting for them," he said, digging the rental keys out of his jacket pocket.

karol looked to you. "do you know what it is?"

"of course not," joshua stated proudly before you could respond. "i'm like a steel trap."

you laughed. "that's definitely not how that phrase is meant to be used."

he raised a brow at you. "that doesn't change the fact that you could never get that info out of me."

"they absolutely could," karol said.

"for sure," krys agreed.

"i just wanted to let you have this," you admitted.

joshua looked between the three of you with his jaw slightly dropped, and seokmin put a hand over his mouth while crossing his arms to disguise the almost laugh on his lips.

"well, i want to see your reaction," krys decided. "so i'm coming."

"wait," soonyoung asked, putting down the retro boombox he had been investigating, among the other things that had been brought from the loft. "like, the surprise?"

"does everyone know about this but me?" you asked, hands hitting your sides in exasperation.

seokmin looked at you with wide, confused eyes. "i don't."

you lifted your hands in a vague prayer towards him. "thank you for your solidarity."

"i wanna see your face, too!" soonyoung said, ignoring you both. "you're gonna freak."

"joshua," you started, turning to him with a look of dread on your face. "what the fuck did you get?"

"i told you!" he exclaimed. "a sex swing!"

there was an excruciatingly long second of silence, making your palm land directly on your face - just above your eye - before seokmin let out a surprised, "a what?"

"he's kidding," you announced, much to the teacher's relief. "and if he's not we're breaking up."

it was decided that the entire party would move to the loft for the surprise reveal, and you watched your friends pile into seokmin's car with your palms sweating slightly and your molars gently gnawing at the fleshy party of your cheek. because, truly, you didn't handle receiving gifts well when you knew what they were, but you didn't have a single clue as to what could be waiting for you in your new home, and that made you a little nervous to have an audience for your possibly piss poor reaction.

joshua's hand found yours on the drive to the apartment. "you okay?"

you blinked and looked over at him, his eyes catching yours between glances at the road. "i don't do surprises."

"so you've said," he nodded. his fingers squeezed at yours lightly and you exhaled. "do you want to know before we go in? you can just act surprised."

your felt your face soften, registering what he was offering you. "joshua, you don't have to do that-"

"i know," he said. "but if it makes you more comfortable, then…"

"no way," you said. "i'll just stop being a baby. you set up a surprise, the least i can do is participate the way you want me to."

he eyed you, then the way you laced your fingers with his. "but you are a baby."

you rolled your eyes. "shut up, no i'm not."

"my baby," he clarified, and you let out an involuntary giggle.

he was guiding you into the kitchen, his large hands placed over your eyes and covering most of your face by proxy, and you didn't quit your playful complaints for the crowd of your closest friends that had gathered around, their presence obvious despite your vision being impaired.

"ready?" joshua asked.

"josh, i literally hate surprises, do we have to do all this?"

"yes," he said frankly. "because i'm doing something nice for us and you're going to love it so can you shut up and let me do this the way i want to like you told me you wanted me to?"

you paused, hearing the way your friends stifled their laughter as you took in a deep breath.

"ready?" he repeated.

"yeah, i guess," you sighed.

the light was harsh when his hands left your face, and you blinked repeatedly at the kitchen that you spent countless hours in, registering what was different. then, it suddenly clicked, the stovetop joshua had always had was replaced by the blue vintage styled range of your dreams.

"joshua!" you gasped, hands going to your face as you spun to look at him, then back at the range. "you bought me a lacanche?!"

he grinned, hands snaking around your waist from behind as you stood frozen in place. "i bought us a lacanche."

seokmin leaned over to krys. "what's a le conch?"

she reached up and put a finger over his mouth, eyes fixed on you. "shh, they're communicating."

you rushed over to the range, joshua following behind you as you ran your hands over the polished chrome handles that you had stared at on the website for years. "and it's all hooked up?"

he nodded, eyes on you with a smile on his face. "tested it last night."

"without me?" you asked, incredulous.

he laughed. "i didn't want to ruin the surprise by burning the loft down directly after."

your finger fidgeted on the handle, looking over to joshua. he gestured for you to go ahead, and you pushed and spun the knob, lighting a burner and squealing. you shut it off again before launching yourself into a hug.

"joshua!" you wailed, arms wrapped around his neck as he laughed, putting his around your waist. "i love it so much ican'tbelieveyouboughtusafucking lacanche range in portuguese blue for no goddamn reason!"

"there was a reason!" he laughed, letting you pull away slightly to study his face. "it's a housewarming gift. i want you to know this place is yours, too, now."

you did your best to suck the tears back into the ducts they belonged in, trying to not show just how much the gesture meant to you in that way, but you were sure one escaped down your cheek when your hands went to the base of his skull, pulling him into a kiss. you forgot the context of the move. you forgot about your friends that had been excitedly crowded in your new kitchen, anticipating your over the top reaction to what they saw as just a new stove. you, however, were overwhelmed by the specifics - the fact that he had picked the color you chose most often when building your hypothetical dream stove on the website you frequented more often than you would ever admit. the fact that it matched the details on the tile of his kitchen backsplash, a detail you hadn't even noticed when you were looking at them online. the chrome vintage knobs, the layout of the burners - everything was exact to what he had seen you dream about, and you couldn't help but feel overwhelmed by the love and care that expressed, hoping you could tell him just how much it meant by working your lips against his.

"ok, gross," krys announced, looking away when the two of you didn't pull apart. "i'm saying goodbye to my wallpaper and we're leaving. would anyone else like to pay their respects?"

seokmin raised his hand, his eyes on the ceiling, and krys grabbed his arm and retreated towards the hall, karol telling them to hurry as soonyoung put up a hand to obstruct his view of you and joshua. when you finally pulled away, it wasn't for their reprieve, though they reacted as though it was. it was so you could look into joshua's eyes, creased with the grin on his face as you gave him a similar one, and you couldn't wait to cook with him, on your, plural, portuguese blue lacanche range, with chrome classique handles, four gas burners, a griddle, and a warming drawer. and it would be your best brunch yet.

[reikoackerman]

Happy Birthday, Levi

Characters: Levi x Rei (me) feat. Ackerman Juniors and many friends

Genre: Modern!au

Warnings: SFW, fluffy. VERY VERY DISGUSTING AND SELF-INDULGENT PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION. IT'S 4. 2K WORDS LONG LOL.

A/N: This is what I meant when I said @mrscommandersmith motivates me to write potentially embarrassing and indulgent things with regard to self-shipping. I can't believe you made me do this Mia 🙈 also @hashaneeee here's something else for you to scream about hahaha love you <3

It was that time of the year again. 

However, this year was extra special. Yes, I said the same to Levi last year, and I told him that last year was very memorable. Yet, this year, I find myself repeating the same thing again. 

Thrice a year, our house would be full of guests and loud laughter; Chinese New Year¹, Mid Autumn Festival², and Christmas eve. Levi’s friends obviously don’t celebrate Chinese New Year and Mid Autumn Festival, yet they still make it every single year without fail, enjoying the yearly hotpot during Chinese New Year and eating mooncakes with us during Mid Autumn.

On Christmas eve every year, we would host a Christmas dinner, partly to spend Christmas together, and also celebrate Levi’s birthday. This year, however, instead of us doing all the cooking, we’re doing a potluck instead. Levi was in the kitchen preparing the roast beef and the other dishes while I went to arrange the cutlery with a dinner set that we only use during this time of the year. 

As usual, Erwin and Mia arrived first with their dishes in tow along with their beautiful children. Erwin brought over homemade mulled wine made by his mother, and Mia baked many amazing pastries for us for dessert. Our three dogs excitedly ran to them and begged for head scratches while Erwin and Mia's children followed behind their parents.

“Aww, who are these handsome boys?” I cooed as Theodore, the oldest, and Isaac, the younger brother, came forward to greet me after removing their shoes. 

“Merry Christmas Aunty Rei!” The both of them called out in harmony. Theodore was the carbon copy of Erwin. He has his hair and his striking blue eyes. Isaac on the other hand was a perfect mix of Erwin and Mia. He has his mum’s face but his dad’s eyes. 

“Good boys. Uncle Levi’s in the kitchen.” I gestured to the kitchen and they ran in. I turned my attention to the toddler in the pram. 

“And hello there little Aria!” I reached my finger out and Aria gently grabbed it, giving me a toothless grin. She’s the youngest among their children, barely a year old. 

“Good to see you, Rei! Your skin looks fantastic.” Mia hugged me tightly as Erwin went to the kitchen to say hi to Levi. 

“Oh, really?” I blushed, hand touching my cheek. “Maybe because I’ve changed my moisturiser.” I giggled as I said hi to Erwin as well. 

“Jia Ling, say hi to Uncle Erwin and Aunty Mia!” I called out in Mandarin, and within seconds, a little pink figure with two low pigtails zoomed out of her room and straight into Erwin’s arms. 

“Hello, Renée, you look lovely today.” Erwin laughed while Mia stroked her cheek. 

“Uncle Erwin! Aunty Mia! Merry Christmas!” Renée, our five-year-old daughter cheerfully replied. Her grey eyes went straight to the paper bag in Mia’s hand, eyeing the contents. 

“Merry Christmas little one, I hope you like this gift from Uncle Erwin and I!” Renée took the bag with a loud ‘merci beaucoup!’ before asking to be let down. 

“Where’s Theodore gege³ and Isaac?” She questioned, her head turning around everywhere. I told her that they were in the kitchen with Levi and she ran there. I chuckled and turned to Mia again while Erwin pushed the pram to our living room. 

“Want to say hi to the twins?” Mia nodded excitedly and I led her to the master bedroom. The twins were up and crawling around in their cots. 

“I think I am a really bad friend because till now, I can’t tell which twin is which,” Mia commented as she smiled at the twins. 

“The one you’re carrying is Pierre, the older one. And then,” I gestured to the white giggling bundle in my arms, “this one’s Léon. You can tell the difference if you stare hard enough.” I brought Leon closer to Mia and she stared hard for a few moments. 

“Hmm…” Mia thought hard with a frown appearing. “Oh, I think I see it! Léon has a mole near his mouth like you.” I nodded as we exited the room with the twins in our arms. 

“You’re right! Leon has the same mole as I do. Also, Pierre has Levi’s eye shape while Léon has mine.” We let the twins down on the carpet in the living room where Erwin was trying to coax a crying Aria. It turned out that Aria peed in her diapers. Mia quickly brought out a new diaper and towel from her bag while Erwin swiftly removed the soiled one and wiped Aria clean. Soon, Aria was giggling again and joining the twins crawling around the dogs. 

“Erwin, you’re so much better at changing diapers than Levi,” I said, bringing out two glasses of water for the Smiths. Erwin shook his hand. 

“It’s nothing. It took me a while to grasp the art of diaper changing too.” We all laughed as Renée ran out of her room, telling me to call her when dinner’s ready because she’s going to go read with Theodore and Isaac. 

“Renée talks about Theo too often sometimes,” I commented while drinking some water. Erwin then joked and said that if Theodore and Renée hang out more, they’re going to fall in love and get married in the future. 

“I’m not letting my daughter marry your son, Eyebrows.” Levi frowned, bringing out the roast beef. “I don’t want to be your in-laws.” I smacked Levi’s butt and told him to be nice. Levi rolled his eyes as I followed him back to the kitchen, bringing out the dishes. 

“Are you doing okay?” Levi hugged me from behind as I sliced some garlic bread. 

“I’m fine, Levi. Don’t worry.” I turned to leave a soft peck on his cheek. “I’ll let you know if I’m feeling sick, okay?” I placed the bread in a basket and Levi turned me around, trapping me between him and the counter. 

“Remember, don’t drink the wine Erwin brought. Drink this cranberry juice instead,” Levi placed a bottle of cranberry juice on the counter. “Don’t eat too much of the fried food that Nanaba is bringing. Also, don’t touch the cheese board—” 

“Levi! Relax, amour.” I pat his cheek, pinching it afterwards. “Don’t worry so much, okay? Besides, it’s not the first time anyway. Just chill and enjoy your birthday celebration, hmm?” Kissing his lips, I brought the garlic bread out with Levi tailing behind me. 

As the sun slowly set, our house gradually got filled. Mike made a fantastic cheese board for us while Hange brought us a huge log cake. Nanaba also brought lots of delicious finger food like fried oysters, chicken nuggets, buffalo wings, cheese fries, and the like. Moblit bought all of us pizza and snacks while Farlan and Isabel made the roast turkey. Other than the roast beef, Levi and I also prepared French onion soup, tacos, as well as some Caesar salad. Everyone wished Levi a happy birthday and placed their presents for him underneath our Christmas tree. 

“Tch, there’s so much unhealthy food. I should have told them to bring more homemade food like—” 

“Hey, Mr Ackerman. What did I tell you about enjoying yourself today?” Levi and I were in our room and he was complaining about the food. I wanted to feed the twins before we ate, in case they start crying. I was holding Léon while Levi rubbed Pierre's back, getting him to burp. 

“But, you can’t eat the pizza Moblit brought. It’s all fat and sodium and you know it’s bad for you.” Levi placed a milk-drunk Pierre back in his cot once he burped. 

“A slice of pizza won’t hurt…” I passed Léon to Levi once he was done, and I went to change. I decided on a light pink dress which was slightly loose around the waist. Once Levi had Léon burp, he gently rocked Léon and placed him in the cot, and went to get changed too. Levi matched me and wore a light pink dress shirt and dark grey tapered trousers. 

“Remember. Stop eating anything that makes you feel sick. I made porridge already.” Levi eyed me from the mirror before stepping out of our bathroom. 

“Yes Sir!” I jokingly got into a salute and went out hand in hand with Levi to join our friends for dinner. 

While the children had their dinner at a small table in front of the television, the rest of us gathered by our dining table in the dining room. Our dining table could only fit six people and we had to add in extra seats to fit everyone. We had to squeeze a little, but everyone didn't mind. It was nice to see everyone gather and catch up on their lives. Everyone loved the roast turkey, and the children loved the pizza. Even Renée, who's a little picky with her food, asked for seconds. 

Dinner progressed through and I had to excuse myself a couple of times. It was either to coax the twins or because the dogs were making too much noise and I had to let them roam around in the backyard before they started to drive our guests nuts. However, there were a few times I had to go to the toilet. Levi kept throwing me nervous glances and followed me wherever I went. I wanted to tell Levi off for being annoying and to tell him to stop shadowing me, but thankfully he kept doing so. I had to go to the toilet to throw up because I ate a fried oyster and felt sick. Levi held my hair and rubbed my back soothingly as I hugged the toilet bowl, feeling nothing but nausea. 

“Are you sure you’re fine? You look really pale.” Levi handed me a towel before helping me up. 

“It’s nothing, love. We went through this before. It’s normal.” I gently patted my mouth with water before tidying up my hair. Levi sighed and looked at me, a look of concern plastered on his face. 

“I know. I know it’s normal. B-but, I just—I just can’t bear to see you like this. I—” 

“Levi Ackerman. Listen to me,” I cupped his cheeks, forcing him to face me. “Don’t let this ruin your birthday dinner, okay? Don’t worry. Also, I’m your wife. I’m stronger than you think” I chuckled, making sure my dress was prim and proper before leaving the toilet. 

“I will let you know if I’m feeling sick again, okay? I promise.” I reached out my pinky finger, assuring my worried husband. Levi relented and hooked pickies with me, and we went back to the dining table. 

“Are you okay, Rei?” Nanaba questioned after pouring herself some of Erwin’s homemade mulled wine. 

“Yeah, Nana, don’t worry. I’m fine. Just feeling a little under the weather.” I smiled, serving her and Moblit more soup. 

“Hey, Rei,” Mike called from across the table, “is the cheeseboard not up to your liking? You haven’t touched it one bit and now I’m sad.” I quickly looked at Levi, not knowing how to explain myself without giving myself away. 

“No dairy for Rei, she’s having a stomachache.” Levi curtly replied before eyeing me again, as though asking me for permission before he could take something off the cheese board. Levi knew how much I loved eating cheese and I knew he was worried that I would feel upset about not being able to eat it. I gave Levi a small smile and patted his thigh, and Levi took a slice of ham and some cheese.

Thankfully, I didn’t feel too sick afterwards and we managed to finish eating dinner without any more incidents. Our friends didn’t seem to catch on to anything either. Farlan and Moblit helped us clean up while the rest of them gathered in the living room to play with the children and to enjoy the desserts prepared by Hange and Mia. The twins seemed to steal all the limelight, and they enjoyed the attention on them too, especially Léon who gets overwhelmed by noise but is giggling and playing with his uncles and aunties. Once we did the gift exchange, everyone urged Levi to open his birthday presents. We’ve been hosting this celebration for Levi for years, yet his face still reddens with embarrassment when he was asked to stand up and open his gifts. Erwin and Mia gifted Levi a new shaver while Hange got him a pair of customised cufflinks. One had an ‘L’ while the other had an ‘R’.

“Well, it obviously stands for ‘Levi’ and ‘Rei’, but I thought that would help you differentiate between your left and right too.” Hange joked while drinking some mulled wine. Everyone laughed while Levi threw Hange a dirty look. Moblit got him a fountain pen engraved with his name while Nanaba bought Levi a set of car fragrances. Farlan and Isabel bought us a set of silky bathrobes and finally it was Mike’s present. It was the largest in size and everyone was curious to know what did Mike bring. Loosening the ribbon and opening the box, inside were a few children’s clothing, children’s storybooks, children’s sneakers, and also new collars for our dogs. Levi stared at Mike with a cocked brow while everyone else started laughing again. 

“So, your idea of a birthday present to me is getting gifts for my children and my dogs, and nothing for me?” Levi had his hands on his waist and looked annoyed. 

“What?” Mike retorted, “who said your birthday presents have to be something for you?” Levi rolled his eyes again but he had a small smile. 

“Fine, you’re not wrong,” Levi looked through the box, flipping through the books. “You better pray hard Renée likes these, and our kids too when they grow up.” As the presents unravelled, Farlan urged Levi to say a few words of thanks. Levi grimaced, silently looking at me asking for help. I simply sat on the armchair next to where Levi was standing, feeling jittery. 

“Uhh. You guys know I’m not an eloquent speaker. But, y-yeah. Thanks for sticking by me all these years, from the time I said I would never fall in love, until now that I am a father myself,” Levi took a good look at everyone before landing his eyes on me, and I gave him a wide smile. 

“Also, we have a special announcement to make.” Levi held out his hand and I stood next to him, unable to contain my excitement. Taking a deep breath, I played with my fingers while Levi’s hands went to my belly. Everyone was staring at us and I felt like throwing up again. 

“We’re expecting, again!” 

Cheers of laughter echoed around the room, and Mia and Isabel rushed forward to hug me. Erwin carried Pierre and Léon, and tickled them saying “well look, you two are going to be older brothers!”. I could also hear Mike telling Farlan “I knew it! It’s impossible for Rei to not eat anything from my cheese board!” in a loud voice. 

“So when is Ackerman number 4 due?” Mia questioned, her hand circling around the barely visible bump underneath my dress. 

“I’m about 10 weeks in, so maybe around June to July next year!” I excitedly told them.

“The both of you need to take a chill pill. I suspect you two are out to earn our money from red packets⁴.” Mike commented while taking another sip of wine. 

“Shut up, Mike, you love my kids. Also, you spoil them too much. Stop giving Renée sweets.” Levi threw a napkin towards Mike while accepting a one-armed hug from him. 

After our friends congratulated us and everyone finished their dessert, it was time for the party to end. Nanaba, Moblit, Hange, and Mike left together in Mike's car while Farlan and Isabel played with Renée while waiting for their taxi. Once their taxi was here, Renée bid them goodnight and went back to her room. Erwin and Mia left with their kids earlier as it was Aria's time to sleep. Renée had a little pout on her face when they left, eagerly telling Mia that she wants to go over to their place soon. 

Once our friends left, Levi went to wash the dishes while I got the dogs to sleep. Pierre and Léon were already in dreamland, sleeping soundly in their cots. I went to check on Renée and she was still up, drawing something on her little desk. 

“Jia Ling, it’s time for bed,” I chimed, knocking on her door. 

“Five more minutes, Mama, I want to finish this and give it to Papa!” I took a peep and Renée was colouring a birthday card for Levi. It was really cute, Levi and I were in the middle of the picture, and she even drew a party hat on his head. Renée was on my left, and the boys were on Levi’s right. She even drew the dogs in their kernels. 

“The card is really pretty. Papa will be very happy. But do you know what will make Papa happier?” Renée put down the crayon and stared at me. “Papa would be happy if he sees his princess clean and ready for bed.” Renée listened immediately and went to the toilet. She stood on her stool and brushed her teeth together with me before changing into her pyjamas. As she climbed into her bed, I tucked her under her blanket and sat down, getting ready to read her a nighttime story. Levi came in after seeing her night light still on. 

“Ma chérie, why are you still awake?” Sitting on Renée’s bed, Levi placed his arm on my shoulder. 

“Papa! I wanted to give you this—” she excitedly jumped out of bed to give Levi the card. Levi took it with both hands and had a wide smile on his face. 

“Thank you, darling. Papa loves it.” Levi caressed her cheek before lifting her blanket, coaxing her to get in. “You’re going to be a big sister again, Renée, and big sisters need to set a good example to their siblings. You’re 20 minutes past your bedtime.” Renée’s eyes widened after hearing what Levi said and visibly sulked. 

“I don’t want to be a big sister again!” Renée pouted, staring at my belly. “Is it a boy again, Mama? I don’t want another brother! Pierre and Léon are so annoying! I don’t want another brother!!” Renée whined and looked at the both of us. “I want a sister! Mama, can I have a sister? We can share our toys and clothes! Aria and come play with us too. And we can fight with Pierre and Léon!” 

“Language, Jia Ling.” I frowned, narrowing my eyes. Of all our children, Renée resembled Levi the most, both in their looks and their temper. Renée giggled and lay down on her pillow. 

“Bonne nuit, Papa! Bonne nuit, Mama! I don’t need a bedtime story tonight.” Renée pecked our cheeks and turned to her side, hugging her big stuffed bear. Levi switched off her night light as I made my way back to our room. Checking on the boys, they were still soundly asleep. I changed into my pyjamas and waited for Levi to join me. Placing my palm on my belly, I couldn’t wait to give Levi his birthday present. 

“Ready for bed, mon cœur?” Levi smiled as he climbed onto the bed, opening his arms to pull me in. I gladly joined him, enjoying the comfortable silence. Levi pushed me upwards after a while and massaged my shoulders. “Are you tired? You’ve done a lot today.” 

“I’m fine amour, don’t worry so much. Besides, you’ve helped a lot too,” I turned towards him, toying with my wedding ring. 

“Have you taken those vitamins? Still feeling nausea? Any leg cramps?” Levi held my hand, fingers gently caressing mine. 

“Yes I have, I’ve taken them already. Also, no I’m not feeling sick and I’m not having leg cramps. Oh before I forget, are you ready for your present?” I smiled, feeling the excitement bubble deep within. 

“You didn’t have to, having you and the kids by my side is good enough.” Levi leaned on the bedrest as I went to take a box from the drawer. Giving it to Levi, I leaned in and gave him a peck on his cheek. Levi looked at me before staring at the box. He shook it, hearing some noise inside. I urged him to open it, and Levi removed the ribbon from the box and took off the lid. He remained silent for a long time and stared at the contents teary-eyed. 

“I-is that—” 

“Yes, amour, it is.” 

Inside the box was a photo of an ultrasound scan, decorated with lots of pink flowers around. The foetus in the ultrasound looked no bigger than an apricot. On the photo was ‘Hi Papa, I can’t wait to meet you ♡’ written in black ink. Levi's thumb gently caressed the photo with a look of longing. “When did you take this?” Levi looked bewildered. 

“During my appointment with the gynae earlier this month, the one your mum accompanied me to,” I took Levi’s hand and placed it on my tiny bump. I took a nervous gulp, grabbing Levi’s hand tighter. Levi’s eyes were on me now. He knows what’s coming, and I know he’s very excited as well. 

“We’re having another girl.” 

Levi let out a sob before hugging me tight. I returned the hug, feeling tears in my eyes too. Levi and I remained like this for a few minutes, our sobbing echoing around the room. 

“Another princess? Really?” Levi released the hug and stroked my belly again. 

“Yes, Levi, another girl. Renée’s going to be so happy.”

“Thank you, mon cœur⁵, for this amazing present,” Kissing my forehead, Levi pulled me to his side again as we lay down on the bed. “This is the best birthday ever.” I giggled, punching him playfully in the shoulder. 

“You said the same thing last year when the boys were only a few months old,” I reached over to turn off the table lamp, pulling the blankets higher. 

“No, this year is really the best. I can’t wait to meet our daughter already.”

“This time next year, she’ll be in your arms sleeping soundly.” I smiled, staring at Levi. The moonlight shone through our windows, gently illuminating his features. 

“I hope she looks like you. Renée resembles me too much.” Levi smiled, stroking my cheek. 

“She can look like me, but she better have your eyes. Mine are boring.” I pouted, leaning closer to Levi. 

“Nonsense. Look at Léon. He has your eyes but my irises. And I know our princess number two will too.” As Levi and I continued on our silly little banter over who our daughter should look like, Léon suddenly started crying. Levi jumped out of bed and quickly carried Léon, checking his diapers. Within seconds, Pierre started crying too and I followed suit, trying to coax Pierre. 

“I think he’s hungry,” Levi said after checking Leon's diapers. Pierre's diapers were clean too. 

“I guess they are hungry.” I laughed and handed Pierre over to Levi while I quickly made two bottles of milk. The twins kept crying while in Levi’s arms. Once I was done, I took Pierre back from Levi and handed him a bottle. Pierre stopped crying once he had his milk, and thankfully Léon stopped crying too. Once the twins finished their milk, we gently rocked them to sleep again and placed them back in their cots. 

“Are you ready to face all these again next year once our princess is born?” I asked Levi, giggling as I went to wash the milk bottles. Levi hugged me from behind and rested his head on my shoulder. Pressing a soft kiss to my cheek, Levi’s hand went to stroke the tiny bump again. 

“Even with three children, I don’t think I ever will be. Heck, I don’t think I’m that great of a father myself,” Levi turned me around and trapped me against the counter again. He seems to really like doing this recently, though I’m not complaining at all. “But for you, for the kids, and for this little one, I’ll always do my best.” I locked eyes with Levi and suddenly felt an overwhelming urge to cry. I don’t know what good deeds I did in my past life to deserve someone like Levi. Sometimes it still feels so surreal that he’s mine. It must be the hormones going haywire because tears started falling before I even knew it. Levi let out a sigh and a low laughter followed behind. 

“I have to admit, I’m not ready for your weird food cravings and crying episodes again, that’s for sure.” I laughed while weeping and Levi pulled me into a hug and slowly patted my back soothingly. Once I had calmed down, Levi wiped the tears on my cheek and gave me a smile, and we made our way back to our bedroom, making sure not to wake the twins up. Making ourselves comfortable under the blankets, Levi pulled close to him, laying my head on his chest and draped his arm around my waist. Our lips met in a soft kiss and Levi whispered “goodnight, mon cœur”. Just then, the clock on the nightstand let out a tiny ‘beep’, and it was exactly midnight. I snuggled closer to Levi, hearing the steady pulse of his heart. 

“Happy birthday, Levi.”

1: Chinese New Year - Occurs on the 1st day to the 15th of the first Lunar month, usually in January or February. The biggest holiday for Chinese. Also known as Lunar New Year and observed by the Vietnamese (Tết Nguyên Đán), Koreans (설날 seolnal), Japanese (正月 shōgetsu) etc.

2: Mid Autumn Festival - Occurs on the 15th day of the eighth Lunar month, usually in September. The second biggest holiday for Chinese. Also observed by the Vietnamese, Koreans (추석 chuseok), Japanese (月見 tsukimi) etc.

3: Gege (哥哥) - Older brother in Chinese. Can also be used on guys older than you.

4: Red packets (红包 hongbao) - Given by married elders/couples to children/unmarried individuals during Chinese New Year. Red packets contain money and it signifies blessings and good fortune from the elders to the younger ones. Children usually pay respects to the elders with a pair of Mandarin oranges, and usually wish auspicious messages to the elders. The red packets are then given in return.

It is also common for children to give red packets to their parents and grandparents to wish them good luck, health and happiness in the new year.

5: Mon cœur - 'My heart' in French. A special nickname I hold close to my heart because my Chinese name has the character for 'heart (心 xin)' in it 🥰

[soulwillower]

taboos and the absurd iii • richie tozier

(professor richie tozier x reader smut)

requested: hi! i just finished reading taboos and the absurd, SUCH A GOOD SERIES. This is just some idea i had and im totally okay if u don’t want to do it, but would you write maybe a final part of the series when the reader finds out richie fucked more students (more than she though) and she gets upset and stops talking to richie (ridiculous jealousy) but he really was falling for her so he talks to her and well things get heated, and KDKDKD ok sorry if im too specific, hope u see this❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰 + hey omg i love the prof. richie series sm 🥵 if you plan on making a pt. 3 might i suggest reader giving richie head while hes giving a lecture and reader gets fucked on the table 😳😳 its hoe hours frfr + so many other requests to continue the series :)

warnings: smut, oral sex (male receiving), bad morals, abuse of power, dont fuck your professor, filthy stuff, professor richie, deepthroating, dirty talk, use of the word slut, cockwarming, unprotected sex, mentions of exhibition, a bit of degradation and a lot of praise, unedited as usual lol

[losers + reader are 20+ in this]

4.4k words

part 3 of taboos and the absurd series. sorry it’s been so long :) i wanted to surprise u a bit with a lil surprise for the holidays. i love u all!! <3

[ i  ii ]

 ♡

you hadn't been to class in almost a week and a half.

it was really bad, you know - and the ditching has started to affect your grade, but you don't even care as much as you really should. because you're.... extremely jealous.

yeah.

you'd first gotten suspicious the lecture after you stayed behind and ended up with professor tozier's dick in your hands. a girl was sitting on his desk after class, when you'd walked in to turn in a late paper, and richie had been twirling her hair. they were laughing together, her bare legs. it made you burn up, and so you tossed the paper down at the drop bin at the back of the classroom loud enough that he noticed you’d come in.

you were so mad you didnt stay to see anymore. and you didnt go to class for more than a week after.

it could have been just an innocent gesture, or maybe just some woman richie was dating - either way, you were beyond jealous. it filled you with rage to imagine richie fucking anyone else, let alone a student. you were hurt, too - because you've really started to like spending time with your professor.

but that backfired of course, because you’re in your apartment staring at an email from him.

i will be at my office on campus after hours this friday, until roughly 9:30. if you're available, i encourage you to stop by.

we have a lot to discuss regarding your grade and future in my class.

thanks,

professor richard tozier

you blink at the screen, your heart racing. your fingers shake slightly as you reach up to rub your temples - oh god, he wants to talk. he's going to turn you down, say it was a mistake, and fail you.

and in the few days until friday, your rage and fear meld together to make a jealous, ugly monster as you stalk up the empty corridors to his office, ready to speak.

it's late, probably around 8 when you knock on his door, but he's still there as promised, answering with a faint come in!

you walk in slowly, heart pounding in anxiety as you meet eyes with him for the first time in almost 14 days. your heart thumps hard still as he nods at you, "you can shut the door and take a seat, ms. y/l/n."

you swallow as you click the door shut and move to the chair, sitting down awkwardly and biting your lip. "hi, professor." you say, afraid your jealousy is going to spill from you if you say anything else.

"you haven't been in class."

you nod, "you noticed."

he sighs through his nose and leans forward on his desk. you clench your thighs - no getting turned on, y/n. not now. "of course i did. i'm your professor, ms. y/l/n."

"right, sir, i almost forgot. you just get so comfortable with all your students now, sometimes it's hard to remember." you bite, and his eyebrows raise. "some more than others." he adds, shooting you a look that you ignore, instead turning your stubborn gaze to the clock behind his curly head. you can nearly smell his cologne from where you sit, and you're almost drooling. you can't let him see it.

"what's going on? your grade is dropping. you’re not coming to classes." he says, sounding like he's concerned. you bite your lip, shaking your head as you look at him. "i'm not going to come to class just to watch you flirt with the girls and let them give you fuck me eyes."

"that's exactly what you do to me constantly, as i seem to recall." he bites back. you feel yourself turn red, but you sit forward more so you lean over his desk just like he is.

"whatever. i don't care, i'd just appreciate it if you'd tell me that you're going to fuck other students so i can leave. and not walk in on you right before you do so.” you say, suddenly so thankful you chose to come later when nobody was on this floor, the only other person in the building being the custodian sleeping at the front desk.

professor tozier tilts his head with a smirk, "oh, you're adorable. my jealous little slut, crying because she can't have me to herself."

your jaw drops, the remaining thin layer of professionalism gone the minute he opened his mouth. "fuck you, professor. i'm leaving."

"i wasn't finished." he says sternly, and something in his voice makes you sit back down. he looks mad and it's confusingly hot, your legs feeling like jelly because of your excitement. "if you weren't such a brat, you would have heard me say that i'm not fucking anyone else. student or not."

you stare at him, confused as your face reddens again. you're embarrassed. "but-"

"the woman you saw last week, when you came back after the lecture. that's professor marsh, she's one of my colleagues and best friends. she's also happily married." he says, sounding pissed off. "i'd appreciate some trust, it's not like i going around fucking every student who wants to open their legs for me - although plenty have tried." he says.

you feel yourself soaking through your panties. god you have problems,don't you? "i'm sorry sir, i-" you start but he shakes his head, standing up from his chair and walking towards you. you watch him with big eyes, as he clenches his jaw. "no, don't apologize. just know. you're the only one." he mutters as he crosses behind you.

you stare at his empty desk, face blushing at his words. the only one. the click of the lock on the door gives you butterflies, and then he's behind you, hand trailing over your shoulder. "if you still want me, that is. your most recent paper was very good, but i know you can do much better. you just have to try for me." he's caressing your neck now, lips ghosting over the skin. you let out a soft moan, goosebumps raising on your soft skin as he feathers it with kisses. your butterflies are alight as you turn your head, kissing him.

he grips your jaw almost immediately, pulling your head upwards towards where he bends over you. you gasp as his hand rests on your thigh, and he smiles against your lips. "you're so sensitive, hmm? when was the last time you touched yourself?"

you gulp, shaking your head, shocked still by his boldness and by your willingness to be honest. "a f-few days ago." you say shakily as he kisses along your jaw, hand sliding up your thigh slowly. he tuts, "baby, you're going to fall apart when i'm through with you." he mutters, almost to himself, and that makes you choke out a moan.

he kisses you again and you push back enthusiastically, hand raising to palm him through his slacks. he's already semi hard, which makes a swell of pride blossom in your chest. but suddenly he breaks off the kiss, hissing in surprise. "fuck." he mutters, backing away from you. you blink, did you go too far? your thighs press together as richie rushes to his desk. "i have to proctor this exam in zoom. in....two minutes."

oh.

you blink and watch as he logs into his laptop and adjusts his hair in its camera. it's endearing, in a way that makes you smile, though extremely riled up and disappointed. you begrudgingly reach for your things, but professor tozier's hand comes up to stop you, "please stay. it's only going to be max forty minutes. i have beer in the bottom drawer if you want some." he rushes out, and you smile. "you sure?" you say shyly.

he looks at you, pausing. "yeah, y/n. of course." he says gently, smiling almost shyly back at you. he looks so young, it makes you stare in awe. his dimple pops and you hear the sound of ringing, the students joining the call to take their exam. only professor tozier would have an exam this late on a friday. asshole, you laugh to yourself.  

you open a bottle of beer you find hidden under a stack of manilla folders, but don't even take a sip as your mind wanders. richie's speaking to the class, sounding professional and confident. you wonder if he's still hard.

so you smirk, feeling bold, and you get down onto your hands and knees and crawl under his desk until you're face level with his belt. gently, you spread his legs apart so you can get up and closer to him, and the slight jump he gives confirms that he didn't even notice you go under the desk.

you gently start to palm him and he clears his throat loudly, fist slamming on the desk slightly above you. over the speakers you hear professor, are you alright? and then richie's muttering, "y-yes, just a slight problem i need to fix." he's gritting it though his teeth and you grin to yourself as you unzip his pants and pull out his fully hard cock, running your fingers over it and smearing the precum. he's breathing tensely and he starts to speak to the class, giving tips on a certain question after one student asks him a question.

you pump him a few times gently, then start to kitten lick his tip, wanting to tease him since you've never had the upper hand like this before. you flatten your tongue along the bottom of his cock, teasing him a bit before slowly taking him into your mouth, sliding a bit before bobbing. the quiet groan he lets out as you take him as far as you can is sinful, a student asking richie about formatting as you suck him off. bobbing your head, you hollow your cheeks and relish in the feeling of richie’s cock in your throat, stretching you out and making you moan around him.

"y-yeah, so for this i'm really just looking for MLA-" he almost hiccups to cover up a groan as you try to hold yourself still with him all the way down your throat, as far as you can take him. "MLA formatting, nothing out of the ordinary. thank you for asking that."

and then you hear him slam a button and he groans out, “you feel so good baby.” he hisses, his hand moving from above the desk down to grip the back of your head, carding through your hair. "don't fucking stop." he says, his hand guiding your head as you work hard.

after a few minutes you pull off of him to take a few breaths, pumping as much as you can with your hand as he tries to act like he isn't getting sucked off while proctoring an exam. you can hear people starting to turn in their exams and saying goodbye, so you take him back into your mouth and try to relax, breathing through your nose as his cock twitches in the back of your throat and you gag.

you bob your head after that, your tongue flat against his cock as he slightly bucks his hips. you feel him type out something for the class and then he moans very lowly, bucking his hips up and you choke a bit as he slides further in your mouth and stretches your throat.

he doesn't feel you that he's about to cum, you just know, and he's clenching the edge of his desk and breathing hard as you eagerly swallow around him, moving slightly so the new angle makes him toss his head back for a brief moment before snapping back to the screen.

"professor, are you sure you’re okay?" someone asks again. you keep bobbing up and down on him as he mutters, "yes, thank you ms. ruben. finish your work and we can leave."

you figure those words are for you, and you move harder, helping him chase his high. he pulls your hair suddenly, which makes you keen forward and take him deep, gagging as you force your throat to relax.

and then soon he’s hitting his high, cumming in your mouth with a silent shudder, his hand squeezing his desk as the other hovers over his keyboard. you moan a bit as you swallow, pulling off him slowly as he pants, eyes glancing down at you.

you slide back up into your seat and sip on your beer, fixing your hair slightly as his eyes bounce from you to the screen. you smile innocently at him, his cheeks flushed and looking disheveled as he waits fro the last students to finish.

it's about three mintes until they're done and he stares directly at you once he ends the meeting. you expect him to say anything but what comes out of his mouth next.

"if you pull something like that again i will fuck you in front of the entire class.” he says it dead serious, eyes bright behind his glasses and boring straight into yours.

your legs feel like they could give out and you turn red as you watch him, “don’t act like that thought doesn’t have you already getting hard again.” is all you can think to say. it spills from your mouth quickly, your mind not even given time to think before you say it.

richie narrows his eyes, rising slowly from his chair and walking towards you, eyes locked the whole time. “funny. because you’re the one who couldn’t even wait two minutes before needing my cock in her mouth. i bet you’d let me fuck you anywhere i wanted and you’d still thank me for it afterwards, right princess?”

you’re not really used to this fierce banter between you and your professor - but when has this ever been professional?

you squeeze your legs together and stand up on wobbly legs. “shut up. you’re the one who said you’d give me first-hand experience on my essay. you wanted me the second you saw me.” you try to regain the upper hand, but he’s walking towards you and your legs hit the edge of his desk.

“of course i did, doll.” he says lowly, lips suddenly very close to yours. “and i still do.”

and you’re kissing again desperately, days upon days of desperation working its way into your kiss as you sit yourself on his desk and he comes between your legs, gripping your thighs.

he's dragging his hips against yours, his hard cock pressing against your heat and making you pant with need as you tug his curly strands. his hands then move to quickly undo his pants and pulling himself out of his boxers, his hard cock slapping against his abdomen. you whimper slightly as you spread your legs a bit, desperate to finally feel him inside you.

and then his hand is grabbing your face, thumb holding your chin as he turns your head to look right at him. "you better do exactly what i say, princess." he says, looking into your eyes. you nod, his thumb grip stern as he lines up at your entrance. “hm? or you wont get what you want.”

"yes, richie, yes. wan' it so bad, please." you mutter, making him smile. "aren’t you a good girl." he says with a grin, nudging your shoulder down until you’re laying on your elbows, legs bent and feet propped against the edge of his desk. then he’s pulling your lacy underwear aside and pushing into you in one motion.

the sudden stretch fills you to the brim and you let out a guttural noise at the feeling, having not been too warmed up to his cock. your back rubs uncomfortably against the wood of the desk as he pushes into you, but your hands grip his shoulders and all you can think about is richie. but then he stills, staring at you as he’s stretching you out, buried to the hilt.

you think he’s giving you time to adjust and so you relax, breathing as you take in the size of him. after a few moments, you kiss him. “please move richie.”

but he doesnt. and you moan, your legs quivering as he gently caresses one of your bent knees.

“good girl, begging for me.” his hands grip your thighs, holding them open as your eyes roll back slightly, “so fuckin’ pretty like this, baby.”

you turn red at the praise, trying to move your hips and feel him deep inside you. his hand falls to your stomach, pressing slightly. he tuts and you gasp, “stay still for me baby, wanna see you wait for it.”

you whimper, eyes closing as you try to breathe normally. his hands run up and down your sides, stomach, chest, hips, and then down your legs as he stands still, buried in you. your breathing is shaky with need. 

and then when you think you can’t handle it any longer, richie slowly pulls out. you moan, hands gripping his shoulders as the feeling coils your abdomen with pleasure. he starts thrusting slowly, picking up the pace so slowly it was torturous.

your nails rake down his back, and even though it’s through his shirt you’re sure it’ll leave faint red lines. your toes curl in pleasure as he moves his hips, hitting the perfect spot inside you.

“look at you, all wrecked on your professor’s cock.” he pounds you into the desk, lips then falling to suck large marks on your neck, the stinging pleasure adding to the volume of your moans.

his hands rise to lift your shirt up over your chest, sliding up to quickly palm your breasts, his hips starting to snap in an unforgiving pace. you feel him so deep inside of you that tears prick at your eyes, the pleasure building instantly. he’s leaning over you as he hits the sweet spot deep inside you, your vision coming in and out of focus as your legs begin to shake. “yes, richie, right there.” you moan, holding him above you as one of his hands goes to your hip, gripping tight as he pulls you towards him in time with his thrusts. it makes you yelp in pleasure, head tiltin back in euphoria.

he pulls back to look at you, hand tugging on your hair so you look at him as he pounds into you. "look at you, such a brat teasing me while i was teaching.” his voice is deep and rough, "look at you now, drunk on my cock. you just needed to remember your place, huh baby?" he coos, pressing a kiss to your temple, the feeling overwhelming as your orgasm creeps up quickly. “such a pretty girl.” he whispers.

you’re speechless as he pounds into you perfectly, the feeling making you sigh. "so perfect, all for me... so fuckin' pretty, baby." he's muttering kissing you like he's claiming you, his teeth clashing slightly with yours and his tongue dominating. you're weak, legs shaking as he pounds into you.

“are you close, doll?” he asks, eyes closed in bliss as he tilts his head back, hair catching the fluorescent light of his office lamp and looking beautiful. “yes, s’close, please-“ you moan, pulling him to your lips.

your eyes close slightly as he thrusts into you, one hand slipping up to roll your nipple softly and making you moan his name. as he sucks a hickey on to your neck, his thrusts begin to get sloppy and you clench around him. “god, you were made for me, baby. fuck, takin’ it so well.” 

and you hit your high after a series of pleas and moans of richie’s name, your eyes rolling back in euphoria. he’s rubbing your cheek, still thrusting as he whispers, “good girl, cumming on my cock.” the moan he lets out at the feeling of you clenching around him has you red as you feel his hips stutter. “fuck, y/n.”

you’re still clenching slightly from overstimulation as richie quickly pulls out of you, cumming on your bare stomach with a moan of your name, a sweet sound from the pink of his lips. you moan in pleasure as you watch him.

you look up with hooded eyes, still coming down from your high as his head falls on your shoulder. “fuckin’ hell, toots.” he whispers with a laugh, which makes you giggle a bit as you catch your breath, mind still muddled.

after a moment richie pulls away, re-tucking in his pants and straightening his shirt. he crosses behind you and returns with a shy, boyish grin and a box of tissues. you smile back and he gently guides your hand away as he reaches for a tissue himself, wiping you clean gently and pressing kisses over your stretch marks, kissing all the way up to your lips and making you giggle. your stomach is full of butterflies as he helps you right yourself from the desk.

“did you drive here?” he asks. you shake your head, looking up to him for a second, “i walked.” you squeak.

he nods. “i’m driving you.”

you flush, “no, i couldn’t ask you to do that, professor.” you say shyly. he throws you a look as he pulls his jacket on, shutting down his work laptop. “get over here now, doll. and don’t protest. i’m driving you, toots. it will make my night to buy us some chinese takeout.”

your heart flutters as you take his hand, glancing at the ground with a smile as he locks his door, both of you stopping and staring at the plaque on the outside of the door that reads:

professor tozier, sociology dept.

you cough and he looks down the hall before grabbing your hand again and making your way out to the parking lot. it’s silent - both of you certainly thinking about how wrong this, whatever it is, is. you almost roll your eyes at the cheesiness of what you think next - but why does it feel so right?

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