#yeah extremely normal shit
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extremely normal shit
#rhett and link#gmm 2431#yeah extremely normal shit#just two dudes at disney#with their baby carrier#once again:#the joy on rhett's face upon cuddling link makes me unwell
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oh okay heres one:
"sleepaway camp"= you go there for at least a few days, a week, sometimes several weeks, and sleep there, as opposed to a """camp""" where you go for the day and your parents or whoever picks you up afterward (those arent really camps, but like. idk when i went to "space camp" it was a weeklong but not sleepaway). in the U.S. at least, the typical image of a sleepaway camp involves staying in cabins, dunno how common it is/what it looks like in other countries.
for the first few i just mean like. not necessarily a stealth church camp, just like. idk, a camp where theres also an Assumption Of Christianity and just general vibes without being actually church camp. So, there might not be daily services and jesusy dedicatwd activities, but maybe theres still a prayer said over meals and shit. Which i assume might exist...
(oh and @reblogforsamplesize if u wanna)
#buzzy#poll#polls#personally: yes i went several times#and i enjoyed it bc. camp!!! yay!!!#but the Church part of it. complicated feelings on that matter#mine were all weeklong camps#went every year for a few years i hink#it was fun bc again YAY CAMP!!! and the ones i went to were like huge things#they had cool water stuff like The Blob and waterslides and some fun games and shit#you could do paintball#and i wasnt like. NOT christian at the time. but i also Wasnt Really Feeling It#i was mostly into it bc. camp.#...maybe i should have asked my parents if i could just go to one of the normal summer camps instead lmao#like the 6 week ones or st#that coulda been fun ....#so my answer is Its Complicated#i did like. participate in the jesus side of things. but i was also kinda knowingly faking it u kno?#i remember one time during a service i started having a bit of a panic attack (mostly bc of the MASSVE crowd. this was a huge ass camp)#but i still had to like. stay. still do everything. my pastor was being nice about it but still was like :( well you cant leave#i remember that was the day we did some shit outside w torches#like. carrying torches in a big procession like some sorta ritual thing ig. fuck if i know.#and i was like crying while following the procession and trying to stop#(the crying STARTED un the megachurch extremely loud giaant speaker GET PUMPED UP!!! area and continued to the torches)#thars my stringest memory from church camp aside from when i fcking DEMOLISHED the frozen t shirt game#(they gave a few ppl on stage frozen t balled up shirts and it was like 'okay first one to unball it and put it on wins!!!')#(and while the two boys i was up against started trying to tear it open with their hands i just#(in my cute lil butterfly shirt and pretty skirt started SMASHING IT AGAINST THE GROUND FULL BODY AAAUUGGHH and broke that shit)#(i was sooo proud of mysekf and my oastors wife thiught it was Unladylike of me but i fucjing won. the boys copied me after a sec)#(but it was too late i won :) anyway yeah like i said mixed feelings u kno. anyway go blue beetles woooo!!!!!
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forever hilarious to me that tennis is promoted as this prestigious highbrow big-brain sport when most tennis fans these days are like. yeah this is my favorite player. yeah i don't know why they're like that. yes they are stupid. no i will not choose somebody else.
#wta tennis#atp tennis#i feel like the era of...shall we say 'federer-esque' players is waning#which i think can in part be related to the loss of the one-handed-backhand#as the sport moves more toward a necessity for fitness and athleticism players do not put as much emphasis on 'art'#which imo is fine! i think the 'art' of tennis is too protected in some ways. which i maybe will expand on later.#but i think it's too much for the tags of a (mostly) silly post#but yeah you can hear a lot of commentators touch on it#i know nadal even said something abt it recently(ish)#but i think as tennis is gradually less associated with this abstract 'image' (e.g. the obsession with federer's 'grace' and 'class')#players are coming in thinking 'this is a physical battle and i am going to win' and very much leaning into the *competition*#which not to say that they're ignoring/denying the mental aspects at all because i actually do think many players are very strategic/aware#and in truth i think many tennis players ARE actually very smart#but i also think it's less apparent because more and more players are able to just hit the shit out of the ball and call it a day#which leaves you with the occasional shot/point/game/set/match etc where it seems like they don't know what the fuck they're doing#but you think about most sports which evolve in phases#it's very normal for certain player profiles to become more or less popular as the landscape of the sport changes#or as new techniques/strategies are developed#or as new communities/populations become interested!#extreme example but think of like. high jump's fosbury flop. that was one guy!#one guy who changed the entire fucking sport! so it makes perfect sense that tennis is continuing to evolve#given how many unique players have come and gone#and how much the sport is changing externally as well as internally#anyways. this got out of hand but i love sports and i love tennis and i love my brainless players.#this whole post was inspired by rewatching sabalenka v boulter and aryna completely missed an overhead by like five feet. lol#love her <3
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um. so like ..... bunny .... sea bunnies .... right . soorry
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#surume splatoon#cuttlefrsh splatoon#agent 4#kinda. yeah i guess. whatever#I AM NOT IMMUNE TO BUNNY SUIT PROPAGANDA. ILL SAY THAT. SORRY!!!!!!#though would normal bunny suits exist? because like ... bunnies. from the springfest right. like ppl know about them#i based them off sea bunnies though. im sure that got the playboy treatment#breaking: toni kensa announces an adult themed magazine (gets shot) IM SORRY#critical plays squid game#🧻 sharts#though it does have me rambling about worldbuilding thoughts#i like to think that the splatoon2 promo squad are X-rankers and especially with surume and cuttlefrsh#and like. xrankers are basically like extreme athletes. only the best of the best. like the nba or something#so they get promo shit
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regardless of the "learn how to be alone" dravel, being lonely actually is really bad for your mental health and can be very painful :p
#i've been doing so so bad#and i've had breakdowns frequently this past week#and i dont have friends or family or a partner or even a therapist lmao#so im alone and thus only feeling worse and worse#my mom has been in an unusual bad mood lately so i havent been able to talk to her at all#but today she asked me to go to her to the store bc she wanted me to buy smth#and on the way we watched the snails and she found them cute (she has never appreciated snails before)#and now i instantly feel a bit better and a bit more normal after only 15 min of hanging out with her#it's so easy for ppl who have family or friends or a partner to judge and criticize me#but like.... u have ppl close to u and u know nothing abt what it feels like to be in my position#it's so condescending and lacking of compassion#i dont understand your pov either but at least im not TELLING YOU directly how much i judge you#like ppl judge me so hard for feeling miserable in my loneliness... but it's easy for u to say those things#like u dont feel my despairing loneliness bc u have a fkn partner. u have fkn friends. or a fkn family. easy for u to judge me from up ther#anyway im much better at being alone than most ppl bc im still alive and im enduring the pain every day#other ppl have ppl around them 💀 only others who are all alone can understand how much it hurts#and it wont be fixed by loving yourself or loving to be alone or whatever other bs they use to criticize u ._.#being alone IS harmful to your health. there are studies on it and im not just making that shit up#i AM allowed to feel pain bc i dont have anyone#ugh esp ppl w partners who can receive physical and romantic attention.... when they judge me.....#stfu forever u have no idea how i feel 💀 and u could never know simply by having had a partner at all...#but yeah. it bothers me too bc i NEVER see someone on here and go#damn i hate this sm i gotta let them know by sending them anons or vague post abt them#like i dont get up in their faces and tell them all my judgemental or bitter or hateful thoughts abt them#even this post is only bc other ppl have taken the liberty to without my consent or having asked tell me directly how pathetic i am#how im not allowed to feel alone. how i have a victim mentality so on and so forth#i never tell other ppl things like that. even if i think them (which honestly i rarely do unless they're extremely toxic TO other ppl) i wo#say shit abt it to them.... ??? like why?#when i sometimes see like ppl have friends on here or talk abt their partners i can feel bitter and jealous#bc im surrounded by seeing things i so deeply crave but im not a humanbeing worth of those things
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okay like the thing is that suicide jokes and such are probably not that bad or that big of a deal if you're not really suicidal but if you're For Real suicidal or have been before and are not doing well mentally and you keep making them and start finding comfort in the thought you could kill yourself if you wanted to. be careful
#like i'm being serious rn 😭😭#it genuinely became my only source of comfort and i ended up feeling like that was the only solution#and it wasn't even necessarily bc i wanted to be dead. at least not most of the time#but it felt like the only way for things to change?#i was so stuck and in the extreme act of killing myself i could see change i could see moving forward#which like. yeah but it's obviously DANGEROUS i mean i could've died for real#sometimes i wish i had blabla but mostly i'm glad i didn't but it was still all so awful to go thru?#and idk sometimes i think if i'd not normalized the idea of suicide in my head for so long i wouldn't have gotten to that point#ik that genuinely most ppl who make suicide jokes are gonna be fine it's not gonna affect them much#but some of us are severely mentally ill 😭😭 i've been suicidal on and off since i was 13 or something#and it's just not good for me and i just want to be like. if you're also mentally ill please analyze if it's bad for you too#bc ah brains are fucked up !!!!!!! like i have a personality disorder and my brain has probably never been Not fucked up so i have to accep#that i have to be gentler towards it bc it'll start having fucked up beliefs easily lmao like the amount of things i rationally understand#but emotionally i believe and feel the opposite and it does NOT help to just rationally know !!!!! which sucks#but i'm working on it with a professional bc yeah i can't just get rid of the bad thoughts and negative shit on my own which i guess is ok?#okayyyyy.. back to football
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Listen I know it was forever ago but what if after lesson 16, whenever the brothers mention how much MC reminds them of Lilith Mc is like, “Who?”
They’re grateful for what she did and honestly I love the thought of them being the only one to see her ghost and they’re besties but like
This is to piss the brothers off and stop them from comparing. They can talk about her. But not compare. Lilith supports this and does not want her greatx70 grandchild to be a walking memory.
#also in this universe it takes a little while for things to go back to normal#this is coming from someone who’s favorite is Belphie#give me the angst give me the trauma that definitely isn’t a mask for my own#give me the extreme guilt that Belphie feels and that slowly turning into an obsessive love for MC#give me all that toxic shit#I’ve been wanting this for idk how many years now#nothing has truly scratched this itch#and I unfortunately don’t have the motivation to start another series#I am planning on adding another chapter for my current one though it’s been to long#but yeah I’m still not over it#and that’s ok#maybe#kinda#no not really#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me belphegor
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.
#I am struggling so hard to pinpoint where the lines are in discussions of situations like the franke and hildebrandt behaviors#because like ok#people keep being so outraged and angry and baffled that they viewed the kids as#deliberately willful and disobedient#and then transitioned into believing them to be infected with evil and or influenced or possessed by demons or under satanic influence#and that’s where everyone is like HOW COULD THEY THINK THIS HOW COULD THEY TELL THEM THAT HOW COULD THEY ETC ETC#and that’s where everyone loses me#like yeah. of course it’s wrong. of course it’s damaging and shitty. but like. what in the world is everyone so shocked and upset by#about that concept (not the physical abuse it caused obviously)#how are you shocked. how are you shocked? it’s just the logical conclusion of believing children have disobedient evil wills#like if you assume evil you’re only going to escalate from there. OBVIOUSLY#I don’t understand how it’s different#where do things cross these lines? no one explains that to me#normal life as usual while tons of kids including me spend years or decades believing we’re evil and under stubborn satanic influence#but in one of the rare situations where it rises to public awareness suddenly everyone is shitting bricks over it#I want those kids drowned in love forever and I wish it never happened to them and their situation#was definitely so so so extreme and severe and I am so glad R was so brave and desperate and got them out#but like. how is everyone so shocked#this is standard. this is common. there’s a huge subculture of people doing and believing this shit#like why is it different just because this case is so visible#so like how is it so hard for people to grasp that this is a widespread issue#I don’t understand#of COURSE it’s wrong to do to someone but like#so many parents and adults do so many of the things these two did just less#fewer hours. less intensely. not in a desert. not with handcuffs and shit. etc.#where’s the line legally? where’s the line culturally?#like how am I supposed to grasp that it’s not a problem until it’s at some level that#I know it’s all Bad but I mean in terms of when the populace starts to mass-care
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started a durge run and immediately chopped off gale's hand because while i don't hate or even particularly dislike gale i do find his story least interesting and most long-winded so i just wanted to skip out on it this time.
i did agonize over who i should have in my party when i did it, though. initially i tried to do it without encountering anyone else but couldn't figure out how to get past astarion without triggering his intro scene, and i figured he'd be the most receptive to random acts of gruesome violence.
i was correct, btw. the conversation went about like this:
durge: O__O *covered in blood*
astarion: well that was certainly a thing that happened.
durge: O__O
astarion: ....are you alright? you look a bit....off.
durge: there is a terrible darkness welling up inside me that i do not understand.
astarion: .....okay cool. just, uh, take care of yourself, yes?
#bg3#bg3 dark urge#bg3 durge#i wonder if i can work it out so i only do unhinged murderbaby shit around astarion but act relatively normal around everyone else#it would be extremely funny to have The Reveal and everyone is shocked except astarion#who's just in the background sipping on a juice box of blood like 'yeah didn't you see them eat that guy's face earlier? no? REALLY? huh.'
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let's remember this
#rhett and link#gmmore 2429#is it an out of context bit#or is it rhett using a character to give a voice to his stream of consciousness?#yeah extremely normal shit#just role-playing on the show again#cool cool cool
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thinking about mtt literally physically dragging eachother down and being restrained to eachother because theyre genuinely that fucking ass for eachother but then it means i'd have to decide which of them to humiliate by putting a collar on them. and i can't choose. if they dont all equally suffer than whats the point man 🙁🙁🙁
#i think they'd all have interesting reactions to it 2#like a permanent collar that cant be taken off. to make even more gruesome what if it were like built into the BONE????#or it could just be something less extreme like bone carvings. killer would absolutely do that shit#anyways i think horror would be the most reactive to it. anger is the most intriguing emotion#and also dog horror real. anyways he'd hate to be demeaned and disrespected like that. he has an ego and honor man and this is cutting it#dust drags him around constantly. killer pets him and disregards his boundaries. like a fucking DOG#because horror hates kist enough that he'd never let them get vulnerable enough. not that it stops killer LMAO#dust thinks some of horrors hatred towards them is a projection of his own self hatred (and hed lowkey be right)#loser. dust i think would be unique because to me he'd be a bit fine with it#i mean i think itd be hidden under paps scarf so it wouldn't be a constant reminder of horror n killer#but he lets the two hold the leash at least a bit. give him an eensy bit of touch and let a few insults slide#but the second he decides that even the smallest thing is enough he gets ticked off and then yk. someone has to put bunny back in his place#because dust is chill enough to let normal things in his eyes pass. he's not very reactionary or the type to immediately bite back#(since dust would just avoid horror and killer if he did meet them. means he has some sort of tolerance for them. keeping his peace fr)#but the moment hes reminded that god these two do suck and i shouldn't be letting this happen all of the held back anger comes out#killer would seek out the force and stuff. horror would treat him like shit because it makes himself feel good and killer look like an idio#dust doesn't even glance at him though and it pisses killer off. both of their actions do actually#like WTF DUST you guys literally put this on me. treat me like the piece of shit i know you think i am#but also STOP HORROR!!!! dont pull me around and demean me im not a pet i dont want to be treated that way even tho i say it do#yeah hes caught in a standstill. AND SO AM I do you see my issue. cannot pick one specific#all the trio would have such interesting reactions i cant just choose one to solely suffer......... anyways mttpoly am i right#should i tag this. like majority of the interesting stuff is in tags. but also i didnt post today i have a duty#dust sans#killer sans#horror sans#murder time trio#utmv#tricule rant#this just ended up being me thinking about mtt with collars. maaan what about handcuffs and chains and other restrictive things#having them have restraining relationship isnt enough i need them to PHYSICALLY RESTRAIN EACHOTHER
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i just showed my mom a video showing a symptom of autism and said "mom... i kinda show everything in this symptom" and she hit me with this banger:
"that's not autism you just have scoliosis and lack folic acid"
#i think at this point she regards all this shit normally bc she has ADHD Pro Plus#i asked her if it was normal that i could recognise a 2000 years old rock piece as a statue#when i was 12#and she said yeah its bc i ate so many walnuts when i was pregnant#MOTHER WALNUTS DONT GIVE YOUR BABY HYPERFIXATION#i told her probably other relatives also have smth like autism and adhd and she was like no they only have extreme narcissism#MOM I HAVE AT LEAST TWO DIAGNOSED COUSINS ARE YOU FR???#mind you my scoliosis is treated with surgery and physical treatment
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tl;dr the last 24 hours:
roommate & i have decided we will, in fact, be getting the fuck out of utah.
but where the fuck out that will be, we have almost no clue.
& so the quest begins.
#(roommate is just like. existentially exhausted by Being Here. & i totally get it. that's a reasonable response.)#(& the funny thing is i'd also been feeling like i Wanted to Be Not Here but i hadn't figured out how to tell roommate about this)#(but then literally the next day he's like yeah so i feel like i maybe want to be Not Here? so like. i think we will be Doing That.)#so i pitched the idea of meeting up later this week to order some takeout dinner & make a Big Ol' List of must-haves & would-like-to-haves#& then start Doing Research & looking into whereabouts fits a sufficient amount of the bill & therefore might warrant an in person vibechec#so yeah lol hi friends do any of you like & recommend the united state you are currently living in#is it culturally & legislatively progressive enough that disabled people like roommate feel like they are generally Given a Shit About#at least more so than here lol#prior to 2020 census redistricting our federal congressperson was a man who wrote a book abt how The Liberals are 'whiners weenies & wimps'#an Extremely Normal Mormon Republican Man#such jesus very compassion
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the more i read about cozy horror the more i understand why people fucking hate the idea of this being considered a “genre”
#like i’m not opposed to the idea of blending a softer vibes with genuine scares#that juxtaposition is really interesting to me and i’d like to incorporate it into my own writing more#but from what i can tell that’s not what defenders of this genre want#they either A) don’t want horror at all (or clearly prefer horror made for children)#(which is fine but that’s already a genre you don’t need to reclassify that shit thank you)#or B) are completely misunderstanding the actual horror of certain movies in order to retroactively fit them into their idea of this genre#which is how we get these horrid ‘feminist’ takes about midsommer or the vvitch#also. just gonna say it. branding cozy horror as ‘horror made for women’ is insidious as fuck#plenty of women enjoy ‘normal’ or more extreme types of horror#and don’t need a ‘softer’ version of the genre#and insinuating otherwise is just straight up misogyny lmao#anyway yeah the criticism is less about the genre itself and more about how this is a canary in the coal mine for the further sanitation of#media especially horror media which is a genre traditionally built on shock value and making you uncomfortable#and the more i read about it the less i want anything to do with the term thanks#marshy speaks
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ok I know I'm already in the process of writing an extremely long video game retelling/au where the protag is a nonhuman who gets suddenly and unwillingly put in a situation where they have to pass as A Normal Guy by the threat of harm/death while also being put into a role where they're the Only One capable of saving the world. but what if I started a DIFFERENT one too
#howling#specifically I've been tossing around this bg3 scenario#where the dark urge and some random druid (specifically a circle of spores druid) are on the nautaloid when it gets attacked#the druid dies badly and the symbiotic entity they're carrying gets kicked out of their host#and so it attaches itself to the nearest living thing as like a self-preservation measure#which happens to be a VERY lobotomized dark urge#as in 'practically brain dead'#and so the entity is now stuck in a new body they have to figure out how to pilot COMPLETELY ALONE#other than the extremely unhelpful passenger already in this fucker's brain (the tadpole)#and still has the dark urge instincts and. well. urges. but they have even LESS access to memories than normal durge has#so it now has to both convince their friends AND their enemies that yes they definitely are a humanoid guy with a past#and not a cloud of sentient fungus puppeting a sort-of corpse#idk I just really love the idea of everyone being like 'wow it's so fucked up that we have parasites in our brains threatening to take over#and this guy is just like. oh hahah yeah (<- is a parasite who took over a guys brain)#anyways. id still be writing history offers preservation but id just ALSO be doing this too#like. idk maybe it'll help my writers block if I can mix shit up a bit#use scrapped ideas for one that might work better for the other y'know#this also isn't like. a guaranteed thing btw. I've just been rotating this concept in my brain for a bit now
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takes a 5 minute break in the middle of writing a scene to sob over Swan Upon Leda by Hozier
#that’s it that’s the post#Seven.txt#writing stuff#hozier#music stuff#cw assault#assault mention#i am. working on something. and realized that the song could fit well into a scene for extra ✨symbolism✨#so of course i had to go listen to it and add it to the appropriate playlists#thing is i absolutely cannot listen to that song without breaking down in tears so. had a cathartic little cry#mid-writing session. as one does.#i’m sorry but if you expect me to be calm and normal when Hozier is out there being THE Man Ever. it’s not gonna happen#like not to be extreme but i don’t know if there’s another man on earth that i’d feel safer and more respected around#fighting for my life not to put him on a pedestal bc i Know he’s just some guy. he’s just a human like everyone else#but how can i be normal about it when he says women’s bodies have never belonged to angels#so they sure as shit have never belonged to men.#obviously he uses prettier words but. my point stands#comparing men assaulting women to an occupier upon ancient land??? *cries so hard i throw up*#Swan Upon Leda earned the honor of going on the very short list of songs that are too painful for me to listen to as Soon as i heard it#like yeah no i’ll never be able to casually listen to it but that is a Compliment. that means that it means Everything to me#okay anyways. *wipes tears* that’s all i just had to get that out of my system#crawling back into my writing cave now. i shall rejoin the world once this wip is Finished#*whispers* in related news. [N]MbD Sun may be the most insanely overprotective guy on earth but byGOD he never wants to hurt you#anyways eheheeeee back to writing my angst goodbye
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