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by-kilian · 1 year

Note

It’s ur “💙” anon coming with part 2 bc she definitely can

Now you see i can’t send photos or gifs but I’ll link them nonetheless u can’t stop me. https://giphy.com/gifs/rihanna-OTbo92zetdsha

Again folks big spoiler alert.

Okay now yelena and levi’s first scene.. um.. why.. why is every possible character so hot dude like!!?!?!!?? I just can’t pick a side without making excuses for the others ughh

“My time in the military shaped me, you know?” She paused. “I had to take lives,” she said in a hushed voice. “Do you know what that’s like?” The switchblade grew heavier in Levi’s pocket. Then an air of understanding passed between him and Yelena in the silence. Levi dipped his hand into his pocket. “Yes.”

This scene… the tension.. i felt everything in every single part of my body istg KW i was screaming and jumping while chewing on my nails until i reached skin it was this good!! I really loved the way they just understood each other it was like “nothing personal, I’m doing my job.” There was an air of idk.. respect and kind of acceptance with a hint of challenge.. i loved it so much

Now back to My fallen angel and the stinky hairy stalkiest asshole in the universe..

Yes he’s a jerk, but a very cunning and nothing-near-stupid one.. he in-fact scared me at some point i gotta admit, because the way he connects the dots is.. wow

“You are already thinking of all the ways you can kill me because you will never be able to shed that part of you.”

“A million and one things raced through your mind, and you were ashamed that more than half of those things were trying to figure out how to kill Mathias. ”

NO BECAUSE I WHEEZED MY LUNGS OUT😭😭😭 https://giphy.com/gifs/PotatoITV-e4-coach-trip-celebrity-ghost-WiCahQsVaUjksEn7aT MY BABY PLANNED HIS MURDER IN 12928 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES😭😭😭 And as she should!!

Fast forward you see.. i should’ve knew things are going down when levi whispered “The die had been cast” i should’ve realized this but i didn’t and that’s why when mathias stabbed kilian i gasped out loud… i felt my heart breaking with her and you see it’s not for the fact that she was actually dying this bitch don’t die.. i mean because she was distracted by the thought of levi getting hurt and that was the meanest most heartbreaking thing I’ve read in a while.. and you know what’s the cherry on top? THINKING THAT SHE DOESNT DESERVE HAPPINESS.. imma kms that’s it..

You couldn’t speak, feeling nothing but pain and heat and heat and pain. It burnt through your body hot even as you felt yourself growing colder. You thought of Levi and tears welled in your eyes

Your description made me feel every single word istg>>>

And Of course i was a sobbing mess while I’m reading her crawling across the floor all bloodied to reach levi, and of course i cried myself to sleep when she reached him, and definitely i screamed in agony once you mentioned orpheus and eurydice again…

Oh and let’s not talk about once levi reached her because it’ll be my last straw..

Levi was never a religious man, but he understood religion when he was with you. With you, Levi understood the temptation that Eve faced in the garden. With you, Levi even understood how angels could fall from grace. With you, Levi understood words he never did before to an exceptionally profound level; words like devotion, redemption, and prayer.Levi wasn’t a religious man, but he learned how to truly pray that night without even meaning to. One single solemn request, the most pious prayer he would ever attempt. “Wake up, sweetheart.”

KW WE CANT NORMALIZE YOU WRITING THIS GOOD OKAY YOUR WORDS ARE ACTUAL DAGGERS ATP THEY ARE CUTTING THROUGH MY SOUL.. AND WDYM WAKP UP SWEETHEART KW DID YOU SPECIALIZE IN CUNTOLOGY WRTING CLASS???? HELLO MISS THATS FORBIDDEN OKAY SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP LITERALLY SHAKING IN AGONY https://giphy.com/gifs/absurdnoise-horror-woman-7ztt6QLRy4PBu

Now ehem next Chapter whohohooooo🤩🤩

The last thing i expected was the chapter going this way tbh.. you see it reminded me of LDBS most heartbreaking chapters that Im never forgetting because they affected me so much.. “about her, where it started, where it ends.” The holy trinity of greif, i felt like i was reading them but now the hurt was pro max because your writing and descriptions are more.. descriptive

Also lmao zeke holding a gum😭😭😭 i knew it was a fever dream when you mentioned it😭😭😭 and the fact that killian cares about him enough to see him, dude if you planned murder during this chapter it would’ve been easier but ofc ofc you wanted to torture us. https://giphy.com/gifs/portlandia-season-2-episode-3-xT1R9SJiGMLJFB5YKA

Now.. annie?? Kw why are you like this and how you know how to connect things perfectly like that it’s pretty iconic tbh!!!

I don’t really know what to say anymore.. but each paragraph was really killing me in every possible way.. i really wished killian was able to see how much people cares about how, not just levi, whom she thinks she doesn’t deserve, but annie, erwin, Isabelle, farlan, eren, i really wished she knew how much they love her, maybe then she’ll know that she deserves every single good thing in this universe, my baby suffered a-lot and that’s why i admire her, if this was an actual novel killian would for sure be the best female mc in terms of surviving, and as levi said: Still, you were nothing if not a survivor. She really is. Our fallen angel🥹💙💙

They’d nicknamed you the “fallen angel,” because you looked exactly like one when you arrived. One of the crash team members said afterwards that if they weren’t so concerned about saving your life, they would have shed a tear for having to cut up your beautiful gown.

I giggled in between my tears when i read this, kw never beating the fashionista allegations even on her death bed which is like a huge slayyyyy she’s a freaking queen💙💙 our fashion icon. I really loved the interaction between annie and levi, you really wrote them so well because.. i don’t know if im the only one who feels this but you know when you’re reading a chapter or a scene and be like.. “yes, this is how things are supposed to be going” from how perfect the writing and writer is? That’s what i felt and still feel every time i read one of your works!!🥹💙

When you woke up again, your face was pressed into a couch that smelt powdery and warm. It was a familiar scent but you couldn’t pinpoint it to someone specifically. As you ran your nails along the green and pink floral upholstery, you felt like you were somewhere you once called home.

Kw you really need to give me lessons on how to describe things, like genuine question how do you make your writing feel.. so so alive, like the words are beating and moving i feel them🥹

Before you could ask her anything more, protest, or move, she took her wooden spoon out of the pot and shoved a sip of it into your mouth, holding your chin as she did.

Sophia?… https://giphy.com/gifs/mafs-sRFFCzAey4IatfTOnQ .. yeah i cried so much then, or not literally but my eyes teared up fr, i need a hug.. https://giphy.com/gifs/portlandia-season-1-episode-6-xT1R9SLI3qYhVbmeQg.

When Eren came by to visit, the first thing he did was make sure to drop some of your favorite chicken lemon soup off to you.

I love love love the way you move from a scene to another, and seeing eren this chap was the most pleasing surprise ever!, he’s a goof ball i love him sm my baby🥹💙💙 I’m sure everything is gonna get better after his appearance i—

Especially when it came to you. Especially when it came to the both of you. The two of you were so used to having the rug pulled out from under you, from having the other shoe drop, from having your lives blown up just at its happiest point, that to not expect the worst almost felt naive.

*gets hit by this paragraph like a truck and starts screaming uncontrollably* https://giphy.com/clips/neonrated-neon-rated-films-ofYZSv3fjXVrvpwlAL

WILL MY SUFFERING EVER END—

“You should’ve brought some clothes for Kilian,” Levi said. It was a knee-jerk reaction, one that surprised both him and Erwin. It was more hopeful than Levi intended for it to be, but he took that as a good thing. He could only hope Erwin wouldn’t make a big deal out of it.

“You seem really happy, Sophia,” you said, turning to her with a smile as you placed the picture back down. “Peaceful almost.”

“You,” she said in English. “Because of you.” ”

“I love you. And I promise I’ll help you finish cooking when I wake up. I might just close my eyes for a bit if that’s okay,” you gestured to the couch, feeling sleep washing over you like a tide in the ocean shore.”

Oh will it seems not never-mind.. https://giphy.com/gifs/bigbrothernlbe-kyXSJ1yPFHZ88W3v79

Now.. farlan and levi, first of all I’m glad he’s not sad anymore or hurt, but i feel like this isn’t the end of it, or maybe was this scene a closure? I’m not sure, but i loved his interaction with levi so much!!!

You know when I first met her, she went by a different name,” Farlan continued as he came into the room, trying his best to change the subject so that Levi wouldn’t keep worrying over you. “But I think Kilian suits her much more.” “What name did she go by instead?” Levi asked, not even shocked that you had somehow crossed paths with Farlan before. “Oh, she went by Annie,” Farlan shrugged. This managed to somehow get a laugh out of Levi for some reason.

That was so cute in some way🥹 i love them so much kw u don’t understand!!!

U don’t understand how much i hate you

“I’ve been waiting for you.”You froze at the sound. He was so kind, so patient, so sweet—you would’ve recognized his voice even with your eyes closed. “Lucas?”

That’s so mean.. that’s literally evil, like omg HOW DARE YOU WE DONT TALK ABOUT WHO-COULDNT-BE-NAMED ANYMORE

“I–” you paused, trying to find your words but finding that they weren’t coming out the right way. “I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever. You left me, that’s not right,” you pouted.

“Yes, you’re wrong,” Lucas said, shaking his head at you in an affectionate manner. “I’m always with you.”

WHY JUST WHY WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY AUAUAGQYAAKSJSJAJAJAJAJ https://giphy.com/gifs/crying-woman-12OloSxMpkEoSI

Levi did not leave your side, not once.

KW I HATE YOUUUUY AHAHHAHHHHHHHHHGHGGGG *insert eren infamous scream*

You hesitated, feeling a sense of warmth coming from behind the door. “Well do you know what’s behind it?” you stood up onto your tippy-toes as if it would help you get a better look. “It’s not what you think,” Lucas confirmed softly. “I promise.”Faltering again, you found that your feet would not move. “But what if I’m not ready?”Lucas shook his head at you, and squeezed your hand again. “You’ve always been ready.” Tears welled in your eyes as the water continued to wash over your feet. “What if I don’t deserve what’s behind that door?”

Kw as much as i love your brilliant mind please.. this hurts like a bitch please dont do it again.. lucas, the way killian cried when she saw him, i don’t know what to say, i just can feel it but i can’t describe it, and you know that a writing is so good when it leaves you speechless like yours did to me now🥹💙💙

When you blinked your eyes open, the first person you saw was Levi. His smile was bright and warm. It made you feel weightless. It made you feel loved. You smiled back, albeit weakly. Levi squeezed your hand gently, still smiling. “Welcome back, sweetheart,” he whispered.

Ending the chapter with welcome back when the last was “wake, up sweetheart.” I SEE WHAT YOUR DOING KW I SEE IT

And i really appreciate it, i would like to thank you so so much for writing these new chapters and blessing us with your amazing, wonderful, beautiful, mesmerizing writing voice and style and descriptions as a whole, thank you really, to me you are my role model in writing, and i aspire to be like you or just make people feel the same way your words make me feel, i really appreciate it and please never stop writing.. never leave us kw because the fan fic writers community needs you my hidden gem.. we need your characters, scenes, gut wrenching stories and everything. If i could thank you in 60 different languages, express my love and admire you in every possible way i would’ve done it, but i know it won’t give you enough credit and it won’t come close to the feelings i go through reading your works. https://giphy.com/gifs/anime-love-bQATeUxCoCFr2

I love you so much kw!!💙💙 https://giphy.com/gifs/love-i-you-that-70s-show-2dQ3FMaMFccpi

Your lovely “💙” anon, hope i be the reason you smile once today, thank you again💙💙💙

My love again!! Gonna answer you underneath the cut 🥹❤️

LMAO @ Yelena being hot. You know what I think it is? The story itself (STH & LDBS) is a very sensual, sexy story. That's kind of the vibes I have in my mind every time I sit down to write it. It's meant to be dark, noir, and sexy, so without meaning to--everything ends up being quite sexy LOL, including characters who aren't main characters.

Also you ABSOLUTELY smashed your interpretation of the scene between Yelena and Levi. That was exactly what I wanted to establish; an understanding. The scene you highlighted in particular was a shared understanding that whatever was about to transpire was not personal. It was a warning of, "hey, I'm going to do whatever I have to do to get my job done," on both ends, and the other person being like, "yeah, and so will I." You are so right when you say there was an understanding, respect, acceptance, AS WELL as a challenge. Juxtaposing the shared notion of both of them having taken lives before was also both of them saying without saying that they are not afraid to kill the other person if it comes down to it (and it did).

And YES. Mathias is such a keen observer. I think all of you always got the sense that he "monitored" people but thought of it in the sense of cameras when it's actually much more literal. He doesn't have to resort to those kinds of things because he catches a lot just by being in peoples' presences. Not only is he trying to get under her skin and make her think she hasn't changed, he's trying to taunt her to hurt him because he wants to prove to her that she is the monster he THINKS she is. You know Kilian hasn't killed anyone in a very long time, but she definitely never lost her touch and could have easily killed him had she not gotten distracted. Like you said, it was the thought of Levi being hurt that distracted her. She was ready to go in for her kill but nothing mattered once she thought something happened to Levi. She loves him more than anything, and in that moment the only thing that mattered was his safety, not hers. In a different situation, Levi would have absolutely done the same thing. And yes, you hit the nail on the head! Her battle with not knowing whether or not she deserves happiness is an on-going one, and although she has changed a lot, sometimes those self-destructive behaviors never really go away.

Sgfsoghs, I did a lot of research into stab wounds and what they felt like. So the fact that you could feel it! 🤌🏼💋 I really wanted that chapter to feel like a knife twist, in every sense of the word so LMFAOOO I'M SORRY 🤣. Now you see why I initially wanted to release it in a double update! I felt horrible to leave you all that way without a sigh of relief in the next chapter, but it seems like you all went through the feels despite that.

And ahhh, thank you so much for your wonderfully kind words! That holy trinity chapter in LDBS was one of the hardest things to write, and in a way, chapter 14 was definitely a trail off of that because I had to tap into similar emotions of walking back to your past so that you could move forward and heal. I definitely think my writing has changed now compared to then so I'm so glad you could feel it differently!

The gum was the funniest part to me, and I honestly added it in for a silly touch and a laugh! Dreams are so silly. I thought it only made sense to introduce you to it with a giggle because it's so out there, it's so odd, and that is EXACTLY how you know it is a dream. I'm so happy you touched on the fact that Kilian only saw Zeke in her dream because she DOES care about him. That is 100% true. And yes, you're right. Kilian murdering Mathias would've been so much easier, but I never do anything easy!

Eee, you are too sweet! I love connecting things and bringing people back. Annie and Farlan were teased to come back WAAY early if you caught any of Isabel's dialogue when she spoke about her friends. You bring up a great point too, hopefully in future chapters, Kilian CAN see how loved she is, not just by Levi but by other people. She means so much to me as a character and I think it comes across each time I go to write her. She isn't perfect, she has flaws, but there is something about her that makes you root for her because I try so hard to touch on her human side as well as her darker sides.

I'm really so happy to know that you all laughed at the purposeful jokes I placed in chapter 14, too. I KNEW it was heavy so I also knew in between it, I had to give you all some light-hearted moments too. That little mention of the dress/fallen angel thing also meant a lot to me to put in because I really wanted to show the banter that happens between people who work in hospitals--the jokes and the humor amongst the horror--because I think that's kind of the only way you can get through the day sometimes after doing something as powerful as saving someone's life or helping someone.

Thank you so much for saying that about Annie and Levi's scene! 🥺 I really loved writing that scene because I could quite literally imagine their characters interacting like that and talking to each other like that, so it means the world to me that it felt like that was how things were supposed to be. You are really too kind.

And I'm always happy to help with writing questions if you have them! Honestly I just have an incredibly vivid imagination of characters and who they are. So when I think of how to write them, I think of everything outside of them--what their home smells like, what kind of furniture they like, how they dress, what they like to listen to--I think all of that helps things "come alive", so to speak. So thank you for saying that as well my love!!

Adding Sophia in definitely killed me but not as much as you know who, who I know you touch on later LMFAO so I will GLADLY offer you a hug.

I honestly love writing Eren in this universe, specifically his connection to Kilian. They don't share as many scenes in this story, but the love they have for each other is there and clearly unbroken and I love coming back to it.

Also, I'm SCREAMING at all of your gifs, you were not joking when you said you went through all 5 stages of grief LMFAO ❤️❤️❤️😭😭😭😭.

As for Farlan and Levi's scene, there is definitely a little more to happen before we get to a full closure, although we're definitely on the way there. Obviously can't spoil anything. But you are right when you say he's not sad or hurt anymore. He's moved on! The only thing is, has Kilian moved on from what she's done to him (hence why she always hid from him every time she saw him)? There's a little more to explore there but it will be touched on (trust me, it's allll planned LOL). That part with Levi laughing @ Kilian's fake name was such a treat to write also. Because he would immediately understand where she got her fake name from and why she chose that to give to Farlan. He made all the connections without even needing further explanation and laughed because he knows his girl better than anyone.

Also... Lucas. I know. I KNOW. I KNOW. I HATE MYSELF. LMFAO I CAN'T EVEN READ THAT SCENE AGAIN WITHOUT CRYING. Honestly, why did I do that to MYSELF is the better question. Because lord! Kilian loves Lucas so much, every time we go back to him, it is a source of pain. That is her deepest childhood wound but also her greatest childhood joy, so to quite literally "swim" back to him was her going back to herself to heal. He told her everything she needed to hear in order to know that he was okay, he never faulted her for what happened, and his life was joyous despite being short. By seeing him again and essentially forgiving herself, Kilian could wake up because she was no longer fighting this idea that she didn't deserve to be loved, hence the end quote in chapter 14. "Open the door. Love was on the other side and it was terrifying. Open the door." I wanted it to seem like this whole time that what was on the other side was possibly death--hence the warm light emanating from behind it--but really, it was just love. Kilian had to realize that she still had a life to live because she is so loved. So loved. She deserves to be loved. So walk through the door.

Ending the chapter with welcome back when the last was “wake, up sweetheart.” I SEE WHAT YOUR DOING KW I SEE IT

LMFAOOOO OSHGFOSH. 🌚 Do you now? But seriously, I want to thank you for both of your beautiful, beautiful, asks. You are such a lovely person, and I cannot express how much I appreciate you. You have recharged my writing spirit, made my day, and have been such a light these past two days. It means the world to me that I can touch your soul with my writing, and I truly mean it when I say it, the door is always open for writing questions ANY TIME you have them. Seriously.

I hope to write for as long as the spirit fuels me, and although my relationship with it truthfully waxes and wanes, a lot has happened recently to make me see that it is something that ignites my soul. And in igniting my own spirit, I can ignite others and touch their hearts and that is something that is truly invaluable.

Seriously, I love YOU so much, 💙 anon! You absolutely were another reason to smile today. I'm smiling now even as I head to bed. Thank you. I cherish you so much. You are always welcome to gush in my inbox, about anything, any time.

#asks #💙 anon

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destiny-fics · 2 years

Note

Plz make a imagine off of this? 😭😭😩

A/n: I feel like I should be cackling evilly but I'm actually just sitting in my avocado oodie writing this instead. This is like, my first time posting actual proper smut so I hope it’s good. Any and all feedback is welcome! Anyway I hope you enjoy this dear anon 🥰

Riding Lessons-Jeong Yunho

[Jeong Yunho x afab!reader]

Warnings: Smut, petnames: babylove, gorgeous, sweetheart, princess, riding, slightly dom!Yunho, slightly sub and inexperienced!reader, Yunho’s got a big dick, oral (f receiving, mentioned), creampie, unprotected sex, please wrap it before you tap it!

Smut under the cut. Minors do not read!

“I want you to ride me tonight gorgeous.”

Yunho was sat at the end of your bed, legs spread deliciously and hard, leaking cock on display for you. He chuckled upon hearing you gasp and seeing your mouth drop open in surprise.

“You want me to what?”

Yunho chucked again and took your hand, drawing you closer until you were straddling his waist, “I want you to ride me tonight,” he repeated the request, big hands settling themselves onto your hips. “If you don’t want to, that’s okay, I can just fuck you like normal.”

“No!” You rushed out, making the man beneath you raise an eyebrow, “I want to ride you, I just…”

“You just?”

You felt your cheeks heat up “I’m just not exactly sure how?” At your admission, Yunho’s eyelids fluttered and he groaned softly. The idea of teaching you how to ride him was so much more enticing than he could have imagined.

“Then I can teach you babylove, would you like that? I can be your personal riding instructor.” You rolled your eyes at his lame joke and the action made Yunho laugh.

“You’re an Idiot Yunho.”

“Yes y/n, but I’m your idiot,” one of Yunho’s hands slipped from your hips and trailed it’s way to your entrance, collecting some of the wetness there before slipping his finger in. Whatever you were about to say died in your throat and you gasped, moaning softly as Yunho began to finger you.

"And you never answered my question gorgeous. Do you want me to teach you how to ride me?" His finger set a steady pace inside of you and you nodded, rolling your hips back onto his hand.

"Yes, I want you to teach me," you whined out. Yunho gave you a triumphant grin and slipped another finger in along the previous, scissoring them gently.

"Then let's stretch you out for me yeah?" He used his free hand to pull you closer as he continued to finger you, feeling high off of your moans and whimpers of his name.

"Yunho...Yunho please."

"Please what babylove?"

"Please fuck me." Yunho groaned appreciatively at your words and pulled his fingers from your pussy, bringing them up to his mouth. You watched in awe as he sucked your wetness from his fingers, eyes rolling to the back of his head and moaning happily.

"Taste so good gorgeous, I'll need to get a proper taste later." He winked at you and adjusted you on his lap, so that you were hovering over his cock. "We'll go as slow as you want to y/n. Let me know if you want to stop okay?"

You nodded and Yunho smiled, lining his cock up with your dripping hole before slowly beginning to lower you onto him. You gasped at the feeling of Yunho's thick cock filling you up and the two of you moaned as you sunk fully onto him; hot, wet walls fluttering around him.

"That's it sweetheart. Feels so fucking good like this yeah?"

You nodded, whimpering. You could feel every inch of Yunho filling you up, moreso than all the times you had fucked before and you were already addicted to this feeling. His big hands found purchase once again on your hips and he looked up at you with hooded eyes.

"You move whenever you're ready y/n. You're already doing so so well for me."

You smiled and nodded, giving an experimental roll of your hips. Yunho moaned melodically, hands tightening on your hips. “Keep doing that princess, just like that.” Yunho began to slowly move you up and down on top of him, leaning his head against the head board and moaning. You whined out his name as pleasure began to slowly build inside of you.

“Yunho…fuck, feels so good.”

“I know,” he began to fuck his hips up into you, making you cry out “You feel so fucking good princess.”

“Want to be good for you,” you whimpered as Yunho’s hand found its way to your clit, rubbing it small gentle circles. Your pussy clenching around him as the knot in your stomach tightened.

“You are babylove. Always so good for me. Make me so fucking hard, all the time,” Yunho’s hips sped up and he groaned out your name “Fuck gorgeous, you’re going to make me cum. Going to fill you up.”

“Please, please fill me up. Make me cum,” you moaned, the pleasure in your stomach beginning to bubble over. Yunho’s fingers on your clit sped up and you let out a loud moan of his name as your orgasm began to wash over you. The feeling of your wet walls clenching around him sent Yunho over the edge and he buried himself inside of you as he came, his hot seed filling you up.

Once you had both come down from your highs, Yunho tucked your hair behind your ear and grinned at you “how are you feeling babylove?”

“So good. I always feel good with you,” you smiled and it made Yunho’s heart flutter. He gently turned the two of you over so you were laying on the bed and began to pull out, the both of you groaning at the squelch as his cock left your hole, Yunho’s cum beginning to trickle out.

“That’s gross,” you giggled, scrunching your face up. Yunho shook his head, kissing your nose.

“It’s hot,” you scrunched up your nose in disgust at his words and Yunho laughed, “What? It is.”

“You’re gross.”

Yunho raised his eyebrow and began to kiss down your body, “Oh? So you don’t want me to clean it up then?”

“I never said that did I?” You sat up onto your elbows so you could watch Yunho make his way down your body, a wicked grin on his face.

“Good,” he pressed a kiss to your sensitive clit, making you squirm, “because I still want a taste.”

Main Masterlist

Ateez Masterlist

#ateez smut #jeong yunho smut #yunho smut #ateez x reader #kpop smut #yunho x reader #jeong yunho x reader

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smol-vampire-pwince · 4 years

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hellooo!!<3 for the agere asks 🐛🌱☀️🚀🐳 and☁️ please? :D sorry for the wait ,:) and i know it’s a lot!! i hope u hv a great and snowy day!!✨ and a happy moo from mr cow🐮🤎

Thank you! 💖

🐛 How long have you been regressing?

I'm aware of regwessing since 2 years I guess, but up until the virus started, it wasn't that often and long. No I'm basically constantly regwessing

🌱 Do you have any baby gear?

Yes, my stuffies and pacis and my oodie!

☀️ what is your fav thing about regressing?

I don't have to mask and I'm happy!

🚀 What's your fav cartoon/movie when regressed?

Dragon Prince! Or Troll hunter!

🐳 What's your fav activity?

I love making puzzles with dada and listening to audiobooks! And videochatting with dada! And I love when we go swimming or even take a bath together! And when he washes my hair!

☁️ When do you usually regress?

I have some positive triggers, such as animal crossing, tumblr and dada calling me butterfly, angel, baby goat or his little vampire prince, but apart from that during school times I usually regress in the evening right after school. And it's always involuntarily!

I answered 🌱☀️ a bit short cause I answered them in another ask, if that's ok.

The snow was gweat! A happy moo back to mr cow! And a happy oink from Teddy! He's answering the qwestions with me! 🐷💖

#sfw agere #sfw kidre #agere #age regression #agere little #kidre #sfw smolspace #stuffies #age regressor #involuntary age regression

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the-fiction-witch · 4 years

Text

Tummy

MOVIE MAZE RUNNER

COUPLE NEWT X READER

RATING SWEET AF

I woke to the bright sunlight shining in though my window. The sunlight peaking over the walls of the maze and shining on my bed. The little nosies of the wood of the homestead slightly creaking, the sound of boys groaning, beds creaking and the showers running as boys began to wake up to begin there days.

The runners likely just heading out at this time, the cooks working on breakfast, the gardeners arranging there tools, the builders working on plans, the scilers checking the animals and the sloppers getting the buckets they will need for the water to clean the showers.

But more importantly then all of this was the sharp aching pain in my stomach.

I checked the day on my watch and groaned knowing the source of this terrible pain.

I stayed in bed trying to ignore the pain wrapping myself in my blankets for as long as I could till my door opened

"Y/n, you're late for work" I heard the familiar British twang utter at my door I didn't even bother to take my head out the covers.

"Go away newt" I groan

"Y/n, you're late for work, Alby is going to get the bloody arse with ya love" he says "come on"

"Nooo" I whine "please newt not today it hurts too much"

"What 'urts?" He asks coming closer and sitting on my bed pulling the covers away enough he could see my face. "'ey" he smiled as he saw me

"Hey, my tummy hurts" I whine almost in tears as it felt like someone was stabbing my stomach and back

"Awww you poor thing, your poor little tummy 'urts, is it... Girl...pains?" He asked slowly a little unsure how to say it

"Yes newt it's my period" I complain

"Okay, I'll go tell zart you're not working today, and I'll go down to the medjacks check if they have any painkillers" he says

"You don't have to newt-" I began but I whined almost crying as it ached with pain again

"I don't 'ave to, but I'm going to because you are in no way a state to bloody work today love let alone anything else" he says "you keep that cute little butt in bed till I get back" he warns getting up off my bed

"My butts cute?" I asked

"It's adorable love" he smiled "don't move" he says messing with my hair

"What if I need to pee?' I giggled

"Okay yes you can go pee love" he laughs going to leave but I grabbed the bottom hem of his hoodie "what's wrong?" He asks

"Don't go" I said Sadly tears welling up in my eyes

"Awww love, I won't be gone long just a few minutes" he reassured "just to get you some pads and some painkillers"

"No" I whine holding him tighter

"'ere, you 'old onto my 'oodie, okay" he says slipping off his white tattered hoodie and handing it to me "you keep 'old of that love till I get back and when I do I'll give you a cuddle to 'elp your tummy feel better" he says so I took it hugging the hoodie close it smelt like newt and was ever so soft so I hugged it tightly and he chuckled a little at me kissing my head before he left my room.

I waited a while just hugging the hoodie close almost fall asleep I was so comfy and happy, I may have had a little nap as next I woke up I wasn't snuggled with his hoodie anymore. Or well I was but he was wearing it. As newt was now laid In my bed with me on his back his hoodie back on and some work on his knee reading and making notes, his other arm around me his hand gently rubbing soft sweet circles on my tummy to null the pain I was laid on him my head on his chest. I looked up at him had he spotted me and smiled

"'ey"

"Hey" I smiled "you didn't have to stay with me"

"I know..." He shrugs

"Why did you stay here? Alby will get mad at you for skipping work" I remind

"I'm second in command I'm allowed" he laughs "besides I'm working, I'm sorting the list for the box"

"Still"

"I told 'im I was looking after you, 'e seemed 'appy, I got you a 'ot water bottle medjacks are out of bloody painkillers again"

I smiled taking the bottle and putting it on my tummy I moved a little even in my pain and gave his lips a little kiss which made him jump a little

"Thank you newt" I smiled

"You're welcome" he smiled back putting his work down so he could wrap his other arm around me keeping me closer to him still gently rubbing my tummy "you get some rest love, I'll stay 'ere till you're all better. I promise" he smiled kissing my head

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basine · 4 years

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Xarian Chronicles (Jall)

“Good Morning and Welcome to Jall, Juices, and G(J)oodies”

A tall man with dark skin walked into the shop and looked around this moldy old shop. He examined a potion that had a dark liquid with a swirling silvery mist in it.

“Now that potion is very, very rare. It gives you the power to disappear and nobody can see you! By the way sir, what’s your name?” Jall asked.

“Jall, we have been over this every time I come into this shop. My name is Iziah Folkor and I run The Brewing Pot down the street. Where is your daughter?” this man named Iziah asked.

“My daughter… Do I have a daughter? Sir, if I had a daughter I would certainly remember her.”

“Dad, I’m right here” a voice came from behind him.

“Who are you? I have never seen you in my life.” Jall said.

“I’m your daughter, you idi-... I mean dad. My name is Savannah. I am 22 years old and I help run this shop with you.”

Jall was confused. This is his shop not anyone else's. He never had a daughter of any sort. The only person that he ever remembers is his dead wife Navi. She died about four years ago in a freak accident. Jall dropped a strong acid potion on his wife and couldn’t stop it from spreading. He tried all of the bases that he knew to stop the spread but none of it worked. His wife dying had a long term effect on him. It feels like he can’t remember anything else besides that. The only good thing to come out that was the acid. It could melt someone's skin in seconds.

Jall walked over to the counter ignoring everyone in the room and opened up his ledger. 15 potions sold this week. Most were healing potions which stunk because he only made a little money on them. That wasn’t what he was looking for. He remembered something important. He sold that acid to someone a little while ago. He scanned the ledger as the girl Savannah was trying to get his attention. There it was. A lined barrel that could withstand the acid was sold to one Eugene McLar of Flegdale.

“Excuse me everyone, sorry to interrupt, but do you know someone named Eugene McLar?” Jall asked.

“Yes, He lives about 6 hours outside of the city. To the west.” Iziah said.

“Yes. Yes. Good. Good.” Jall mumbled.

He hopped down off of his stepping stool and went into the other room and started to collect some potions. Some potions of fire resistance, some of possibility, some healing. He took these potions and started to load them into his cart.

“Dad! Where are you going? Why are you leaving the shoo?” Savannah asked.

“I have some things to do girl. I made a mistake once and I won’t let someone do it like I did.” Jall replied.

“What do you mean? Mistakes? Dad! You haven’t left the shop in over 30 years! Why are you leaving now?”

“I have a duty to protect those who buy my potions. Someone bought something dangerous and I need to stop them. Maybe I will run into some people along the way. I could sell all of these potions.”

Savannah sighed and walked away. Jall hooked up his horse to his cart and felt a sense of accomplishment. He was going to save someone. He wouldn’t let his customer die to this acid. He started his horse and went on his merry way.

His mind drifted from time to time. He thought about the sky, he thought about the trees, the ocean, and Navi. He wanted to make sure he didn’t forget his plan. Get that acid barrel back and save Mr. Eugene. Iziah said that he was west of Flegdale which means that he would be in Quinigar. I am so smart. I know what is west of Flegdale, Jall thought to himself. He kept moving forward hearing his potions jingle back and forth. Then he saw it. His first 5 customers on the road.

#xaria campaign #this one is for you thiss #my fav npc #jall is my spirit animal #he is the bbeg #you all will like him someday

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the-case-book-of-fanfiction · 4 years

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Spring Cleaning

A Sherlockian Story

Inspired by watching the movie Clue too many times and the songs Sh-Boom by The Chords and Shake, Rattle, and Roll by Bill Haley and the Comets (both of which are in Clue).

Summary: John is out at the store (hopefully not having another row with a machine). Sherlock is at St. Bart’s. Mrs. Hudson is vacuuming. Molly is taking care of Rosie. Gwynn has been sneezing for weeks—so it’s time for some spring cleaning.

814 words (Shortest one yet!)

youtube

Wearin’ those dresses, your hair done up so nice. Wearin’ those dresses, your hair done up so nice. You look so warm but your heart is cold as ice. I said shake, rattle, and roll! I said shake, rattle, and roll! I said shake, rattle, and roll! I said shake, rattle, and roll!

It was spring cleaning day in 221B Baker Street. A near-constant state of sneezing and the sudden accumulation of dust on her dresser had pushed Gwynn into doing so—and with John and Sherlock both out, Mrs. Hudson busy with the vacuum, now was the perfect time.

Not to mention she could get away with listening to whatever she wanted—and, right now, whatever she wanted was Shake, Rattle, and Roll and the rest of the oldies in her playlist.

Dancing and bopping to herself, Gwynn hummed along as she ran the duster across the tops of the kitchen cabinetry. She cleaned out the wine glasses they hardly ever used, cleaned the table, organized drawers and cabinets, swept the floors, vacuumed the carpets. She washed the sheets, laundered the clothes, cleaned out the fridge and restocked it with actual food for John and herself. And knowing Sherlock wouldn’t eat much unless she found all his favorites, she made herself a shopping list.

Life could be a dream (sh-boom) If I could take you up in paradise up above (sh-boom) If you would tell me I'm the only one that you love Life could be a dream sweetheart (Hello hello again, sh-boom and hopin' we'll meet again) boom sh-boom Hey nonny ding dong, alang alang alang (sh-boom) Ba-doh, ba-doo ba-doodle-ay Life could be a dream Life could be a dream, sweetheart

This one Gwynn sang along to, nearly belting at the top of her voice.

“Oooooooh! Life could be a dream, sh-boom. If I could take you up in paradise up above—sh-boom—if you would tell me I'm the only one that you love, life could be a dream sweetheart!”

(Hello hello again, sh-boom and hopin' we'll meet again) boom sh-boom Hey nonny ding dong, alang alang alang (sh-boom) Ba-doh, ba-doo ba-doodle-ay Life could be a dream Life could be a dream Dee-oody-ooh, sh-boom, sh-boom!

Gwynn never noticed the door open, too busy dancing with the broom in the kitchen. She only realized anyone had walked in when Sherlock’s hand squeezed her hip, making her jump, and his silken voice, laced with amusement, asked, “Having fun?”

Despite herself, Gwynn laughed. “Sherlock, hi! Hi! Um—hi! I, uh, didn’t realize you’d...come home...”

He kissed her temple. “Why don’t you play that song again, darling, and you can dance with me instead of that broom.” He took the broom from her hand and rested it against the wall, pulling her into the living room.

“Are you jealous of an inanimate object?” Gwynn teased as she clicked replay.

As the song started, Sherlock began to sway her. “I’m jealous that my girlfriend decided to dance without me.” He gave her a little pout and she threw her head back in laughter.

John heard music when he stepped into the building. He frowned and glanced toward Mrs. Hudson’s flat, but there was no sound coming from within.

In fact...

Was it coming from his flat?

He climbed the stairs and was greeted by Mrs. Hudson leaning against the wall, watching through a small crack of the open door, a smile on her face.

“Mrs. Hud—”

“Shh!” the landlady admonished. “Look!” She made space for him, and together they peeked inside.

Sherlock and Gwynn were dancing together to Shake, Rattle, and Roll. It wasn’t the conventional dancing John knew Sherlock loved—no, it was 50s jazz dancing, each laughing and snatching kisses from the other.

John and Mrs. Hudson both shared a wide-eyed glance, each with a smile twitching at their lips, as Sherlock pressed kisses to Gwynn’s jaw, down her neck, across her collarbone.

“You might want to interrupt them before it goes too far,” John murmured, but Gwynn laughed and swatted Sherlock away, running her fingers through his hair with a smile.

Sherlock laughed his deep, throaty laugh and kissed her nose as the song changed.

John rapped his knuckles on the door before he pushed it open. Gwynn scrambled to pause her music, but neither stepped away from each other.

“Hello,” John said, drawing out the word.

“Hi,” Gwynn chirped pleasantly.

“Hello, John.” Sherlock sounded ridiculously smug.

John gestured to the flat. “Nice and clean, Gwynn, I see.”

“I did some spring cleaning,” she agreed. She stepped out of Sherlock’s arms. “Have to go shopping, actually.”

John lifted both arms, laden with bags. “I just went!”

“Hmm, yes. I’m going to get food this one—” She poked Sherlock’s stomach. “—will eat!”

She threw on her coat, picked up her list, and dashed out the door.

Sherlock turned, smiling, to John and Mrs. Hudson. It was a smile that made John smile as well. “I love that woman.”

“Tell her that,” John suggested.

Sherlock didn’t waste a heartbeat. “So I will.” He slipped into his own coat and followed her out. Mrs. Hudson and John watched from the window as Sherlock told Gwynn and Gwynn kissed him softly.

John and Mrs. Hudson high-fived.

#sherlock #gwynntern #sherlockholmes

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ask-the-jester-buds · 6 years

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❤ for risata and 💕 for venter and pygmlo!

❤️ Do they fall in love easily?

nAh brOthEr.. I mIght sEEm A bIt flIrty And I mIght prAisE A lOt Of IntErEstIn’, gOOd lOOkIn’ trOlls… bUt It wOUld nEvEr gO bEyOnd A frIEndly IntErActIOn.

I trUst EAsIly yEs, bUt my hEArt dOn’t, And yOU hAvE tO bE mIghty spEcIAl tO wIn mE OvEr At A 100%.OncE yOU dO, I’m A lOyAl pArtnEr fOr lIfE.

💕Are they open to threesomes or a polyamorous relationship?

||I doubt there is another tro|| in this universe that can understand us and our re|ationship enough to be ab|e to join…|| || Besides I’m not keen on sharing my dear Venter, whoever tries to take them away from me wi|| be turned into a b|oody pu|p.||

|| They are a|| I need… And I’m a|| they need…||

#Risata Hiaena #Venter & Pygmlo #Anonymous

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femmedplume · 6 years

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Bastille @ the Wiltern (aka How Dan Smith Kissed Me)

Okay friends, strap in, this is gonna be a ride -- partially because I’s super excited, and partially because this is my ONE CHANCE to get revenge for the millions of SPN Con breakdowns I’ve had to read over the years, lol. ((BUT, because I am a nice nice Stitch, I shall put a read more break and you can scroll to the bottom if all you want to read is the kiss part lol.))

To start off, dis me and mah buddy Mikey ( @gnaist)

We have known each other since fucking JUNIOR HIGH, and (as I told him last night,) there are v v few people I enjoy enough to tolerate them for over twenty years, let alone still actively want to see them. Dis guy? He dat guy. :) And he also puts up with me with minimal complaining.

Mikey and I share a birthday week, and we usually do something together (just us) during September to celebrate. This year, he was sweet enough to agree that our Birthday Shenanigans™ should take place at the ONE gig Bastille’s playing in LA -- not because he's a fan, but because I am. #FriendshipGoals

So first, I got all dolled up, with fancy pink and purple hair and Bastille-themed nails:

(That’s 00:15 for their song Quarter Past Midnight, a ∆ , and a letter for each member of the band: Charlie (guitar), Woody (drums), Will (bass), Kyle (keyboards), and Dan (lead singer))

Then, I drove to Mikey’s and gave him his half of our newest tradition: Birthday Socks!! One for me and one for him.

We had dinner at this awesome patisserie close to Mikey’s awesome new place (shoutout to him for Adulting and buying his first condo!) We also got cake because Birthday Shenanigans™.

The food was super tasty, and the cakes were CHOCOLATE AF (don’t talk to me about my allergies, okay? Is mah BIRTHDAY)

We were running late, so we actually ate in the Lyft (the driver was nice enough to let us, and we were careful not to spill.) We got to the Wiltern at 7pm, JUST as they started letting people in.

Once we got in, we got overpriced (but very tasty) drinkies (Birthday Shenanigans™)

And then Mikey informed me that if we were going to a concert, we were getting merch. (Mikey is v v wise and a literal doctor, so I 100% believe anything he tells me.) We got shirts!

He got a cute Quarter Past Midnight shirt (that was also unusually soft and high quality,) and I got the tie-dye one that’s based off Dan Smith’s actual shirt. I’mma cut up the collar like I do with all my shirts because I hate t-shirt collars.

Then we went inside the actual theatre, which is an Art Deco beauty. They’d taken out all the seats, but the orchestra section has many shallow levels/risers, and people could basically choose which section they wanted to stand in. There was a bar INSIDE the theatre. The lighting was too low for good pics, but you can sorta see in this:

The very front pit and center section were filled with people who hadn’t sauntered in four hours late with chocolate mousse cake -- but there was space off to the right where we could stand and only two people were in front of us. YAY!

Then we waited. And waited. AND WAITED LIKE WTF PEOPLE?? I figure the Wiltern wants to give people time to buy drinks and stuff, but two HOURS???

Finally, about 9pm, the support act came on: a female singer named Fletcher? Anyone heard of her? Anyway, she was really good, had a gorgeous voice -- although we couldn’t understand what she was singing, but that was more because of the mic set up.

(Das her. V petite and blonde and has a looooot of songs about breakups, lol.)

Once Fletcher finished her set, there was another break while the road crew set up Bastille’s equipment. It was sort of fun to watch, because they’re all English blokes so they’re chatting away in cute accents while they’re doing the setup.

And then, FINALLY, Bastille came on stage.

And it.

Was.

WORTH IT.

They went hard from the moment they stepped on stage, and kept the energy up the entire time.

I cannot fully express to you how electric they are live -- but let’s just say that all the good pictures are Mikey’s because a) he is the bestest of friends and played cameraman for the evening -- but also b) I was too busy jumping around with Dan to get any actual images of Dan jumping around

He even raced up to the balcony during Flaws, WHILE SINGING and dancing. (I was a bit disappointed he didn’t come by where we were standing, but I was also happy for the balcony peoples because you don’t normally get to interact much in the balcony. Also: ART DECO!!!)

Dan Smith’s voice was PEAK HONEY, and he did all the songs I hoped he would: The Draw, Blame, Quarter Past Midnight...hell, I’ll just show you the set-list, which I got to see after the show:

(The girl holding it was the one who got to keep it -- she was super sweet and a HUGE fan who’d been to tons of concerts but had never gotten a hold of a set-list, so we were all happy she finally got one! :D)

SIDENOTE:

During the show, there was this moment in the song Bad Blood where Dan came over to the side of the stage where we were standing. Now, the camera lens makes it seem like we were farther away than we were, like this:

When in reality we could see more like this:

So the band could see our faces, too. So during Bad Blood, Dan’s singing, and I’m singing along with him (like a goober) and I raised my hand like you do when you’re feeling a song...

and he RAISED HIS HAND BACK AND SANG TO ME!

For like, two seconds, but still. It was a MOMENT.

After that, I was floating on Cloud 9 -- so when the concert ended, I was ready to call it a perfect night. But when we went out (the back exit, as it was closer,) Mikey mentioned that because the line had stretched around the far corner of the Wiltern, we’d never gotten a chance to get a pic of the actual marquis.

So we paused, and I looked back at the theater alley and thought -- huh, I wonder if they might...come out afterwards? Mebbe sign a few things? I has this nice shirt I spent too much money on...mebbe they sign my nice shirt, eh?

So Mikey went to get his pic of the marquis, which came out FABULOUSLY:

And then we settled in to wait at the end of the alley where we thought they might come out. Turns out, we were at the wrong end. So after like, 30 mins of waiting on one end, we (there were like, 20 of us) meandered over to the OTHER end of the alley, where the band’s cars were waiting and the crew was loading out the equipment.

BTW, the Bastille crew? Super sweet, English and American, and those boys fucking HUSTLED. They were rolling 300-400lb equipment into this semi, basically doing the world’s largest game of Tetris, trying to fit everything in. We was all v v impressed.

They also brought us water?? Because we’d been waiting for an hour and a half at this point and they felt bad, like...?? AND THEN, they gave us the balloons from the set!!

And all the fans were really nice, and started taking the bunches of balloons apart so that everyone who wanted a balloon could have one (I got a green one, mah favorite color!)

So we’re waiting. And waiting. And WAITING GODDAMN DON’T THEY HAVE CLOCKS IN ENGLAND??

The crew finishes loading, the semi backs out, still we wait. Their manager finally comes out and says that yes they’re coming out, but probably only going to take a couple of group shots with all of us/not sign anything or chat. Why? Because the boys are exhausted. He tells us they’ve flown from England to Sacramento to Vegas to LA in 3 days and played 4 shows, soo... understandable situation.

EXCEPT for this one fan, who started whining at the manager. “I didn’t wait ALL THIS TIME for some fucking group shot, I want a SELFIE!” “I need Dan to take a pic of me with my SIGN!!” (She kept harping about her sign... is no even a good sign?)

Then, when it looked for a second like maybe the boys weren’t coming out at all, she snaps “You PROMISED they were coming!!” >:( The tone of this person’s voice, man -- you know the one? Like she’s Sharon at the Walmart and they were out of stock of Pantene Pro-V or some shit and they OWED HER some gotdamn PANTENE and where is the manager?? Ugh.

Anywho, the boys come out. (Except Will. He might have already fallen asleep, IDK lol.) But there was a Dan and a Kyle and a Woody, and they all not ONLY took some group shots, but DID give hugs and stuffs.

(Dan giving hugs. Woody, who was totally smiley and friendly and not a miserable git like this pic makes him look...right after this moment he ran over and gave the girl next to me a hug. Kyle was off to my right, giving many hugs and taking many pictures.)

(Dan in a taco hat a fan had given him. Woody heading back after giving many hugs.)

(Dan apologizing profusely because someone gave him a shirt for a present and he hadn’t realized that there was an image of a nekkid lady in the art collage on the front, and we were all ladies and he didn’t want us to feel uncomfortable or think he was a misogynist so he covered it up oh god he’s such a cinnamon roll I cannot!)

And now, the moment you’ve been waiting for: THE KISS.

So, during the interminable waiting, (literally, TWO HOURS PLUS, you guys!) several of us started chatting -- during the chat, it came up that I has made a Bastille art. I showed the ladies this pic:

because we were all talking about Dan shaving his head and I was trying to convince them it was actually kinda hot, lol.

They really liked the art!! :D So much so that they convinced me (after many prods and encouragements) to show the art to Dan. And I was gonna do it, honest! I was super brave and not at all terrified.

But then came the whole they’re too tired thing and I was like, eh, mebbe no?

And THEN, Superbitch Fan was standing right next to me DEMANDING that Dan take a selfie with her and her sign. (Which he did, like a sweetheart.) Then when he went to turn to me, Superbitch decided she didn’t like the first pic, and PUSHED IN FRONT OF ME AND PAST THE SECURITY BARRIER to demand he take another one.

Which he did, like a sweetheart -- but then turned past me, probably so she couldn’t grab him again. So I figured, lost cause, right?

Wrong. As he turned back, I was holding the phone out, but not quite up, kind of undecided -- and it caught his eye.

Daniel Campbell Smith GASPED, CLUTCHED HIS HEART

and said “Wow.” Looked at the pic, then back to me, said, “Did you...”

And I held it up and said “Um, yes, I made you...an art?” (Because you know, what are words and why would I, a writer, know how to use them?)

And he just gaped, like HE had no words -- and then leaned in and KISSED ME ON THE CHEEK.

And not a peck, either?? Like a firm, full on “you are amazing and so is your art thing thank you so much” kiss for several seconds??

AND MIKEY GOT THE PIC!

TL;DR:

It may be blurry, but there it is! Immortalized for all time, the moment Daniel Cinnamon Roll Smith liked my artwork SO MUCH he had to kiss me to say thank you.

And then, dear friends, I died.

I have, in fact, been writing this diary from my condo on the edge of the Lake of Fire in Hades. Because I’m dead.

BEST. NIGHT. EVER!!**

((Bonus: Mikey is now a Bastille fan! He really liked the concert, and is going to make his own playlist based on the concert’s set list. I’m so freaking happy we got to share that!! :DDDD))

((Super-bonus: Look in the right-hand corner of the kiss pic. See that woman looking like she’s having her night ruined? THAT was Superbitch. HA!))

**All credit to @gnaist for taking pictures of the entire night, even when I didn’t know he was shooting lol.

#this has been the entirely true diary of your friendly neighborhood Stitch #thanks for reading #I promise I'll post some video of the concert in a bit #stitch in real life #bastille #dan smith: deep enough to drown #concert #the wiltern #live music #fanart #IDK what else to tag this but I feel like I's missing something?#oh!#the doctor and stitch

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alex-67 · 3 years

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So I bit the bullet and defriended that radicalised “Christian” friend of mine. It sucked having to do it, but for my own sanity, it had to be done.

Random thought of the day: ‘How do squirrels manage to fit so many nuts into their mouths?’ That is weird. And it’s just a random thought that popped into my head. I think I saw a story on squirrels landing on their feet and looking like tiny superheroes when they do it.

I’m struggling at the moment, having entered into a manic episode last week, I am still semi-manic and that’s not good. I spent $500 on stuff... that’s a lot of stuff. A lot. When you think about it. It’s all stuff I needed, but I bought all at once. Silly me.

I wonder why that’s a symptom of bipolar? I mean, I understand what bipolar is and what it does, but some of the symptoms and triggers are crazy.

We’re coming into the cooler months here, with April just around the corner, I am looking forward to the winter in June. I bought myself an Oodie and a weighted blanket. Can’t wait to get those. I am looking forward to the better sleep that I will get with the blanket.

My sister is in lockdown again for three days, possibly more as areas of Queensland go into lockdown. She has a compromised immune system, so she has to take care of herself. So many anti-vaxxers out there that don’t have any common sense. It’s crazy. And yes, that’s my opinion. I don’t think these conspiracy theorists should be given any attention. They’re dangerous. Especially with followers of Q-Anon posting stuff on Australian news sites in the comments. It shouldn’t be any of their business what is going on in a country they don’t live in. They go on and on about our ‘freedoms’... I’d love to see what would happen if there were to ever come under communist rule. They would be crying then. They think they don’t have freedom now. Crazy people. Crazy.

Right, well, I guess that’s enough on that topic too. I am definitely still suffering from mania, I am letting the random thoughts flow with not much in the way of giving any cares about how I feel or what people think... mainly because I don’t care.

Anyway, that’s enough from me today. I will post again soon, no doubt.

#random thoughts #my writing #mental health

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lumivalkoruusunpuna · 5 years

Note

have you been to the Oodi library? I just saw a picture and the architecture is beautiful!

Yes! I’m actually going there to study again today! It’s just really cool and I get so hyped about libraries :D. It can be a little loud for a library but all the cool little places and things you can do there totally pays off! There’s even sewing machines that can be reserved for free! And gaming rooms! And 3D printers ?? Gosh I love libraries. Thank you for giving me an opportunity for a small ramble stranger!

#ask #asks

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haphazardstudy · 7 years

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💛 Hey I only recently started following you but I would love a blog rate my pictures are tagged as #mine

thanks so much for following me, I’d love to give you a blog rate! 💛 also hey, you’re from ireland? I’m from northern ireland! cool!

following: no, sorry, ur great tho! | I am now! | yes | FOREVER AND ALWAYS

overall: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

your theme and icon both look really nice!!! only problem with your theme is that for some reason it doesn’t enlarge photos when you click on them? (fairly minor problem but it means I couldn’t get a decent look at your original posts!) oh btw good luck with 100 days of productivity! :)

#haphazardblogrates #study-at-the-disco

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sarahburness · 7 years

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Put Down Your Phone: Why Presence Is the Best Gift You’ll Ever Give

“When you love someone, the best thing you can offer is your presence. How can you love if you are not there?” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

The only thing worse than not listening to someone is pretending to listen.

Giving the vague murmur of agreement, or a quick nod to communicate “Yes, I'm listening, totally,” when really, we're not.

I remember vividly a dinner I had with friends about four years ago. I'd been backpacking in New Zealand for twelve months and had just returned to the UK. Traveling in the car to my friend's house, I imagined how the night would look…

There would be lots of laughter (it was always side-splitting when we all got together).

There would be lots of hugging (I hadn't seen them for a whole year after all)!

There would be lots of storytelling (I would get to share my epic adventure).

Did all of this happen? To some extent, yes, but not how I had imagined.

In fact, I left feeling a little miffed, a little gutted.

At first, I couldn't work out why.

My friends were the same old fun-to-be-around people.

Despite ‘finding myself' while traveling (I joke), I felt I was pretty much the same old person.

So what was different?

It hit me.

The constant. Mobile. Phones.

The entire evening was tainted by endless selfies, videos, status updates, incoming phone calls, outgoing phone calls, and notifications.

Distraction, after distraction, after distraction.

There were moments you could have heard a pin drop as the four of us, faces illuminated by the glow of the mobile phones, sat, hands glued to our devices. Ironically, telling anyone who was on Facebook and Instagram that night what a terrific time we were having.

To begin with, I was angry with my friends. But sooner I realized, I was really angry with myself. I was equally guilty, and people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones after all.

What could have been, rather, what should have been, an evening of being deeply present with one another, each one of us offering our full and undivided attention, was tainted by technology, spoiled by social media, marred by meddling mobiles.

Backpacking was more campfires and deep life conversations below the stars, so this evening was felt like a return to reality. Most of us struggle to put our flipping phones down.

If we stop and think about it, what message does it send to the human beings in front of us when we are busy on our phones?

I made a vow that evening to get better at this, to be more present with friends and family, anyone I'm communicating with.

I didn't want to make anyone feel how I felt that evening—unheard and unimportant.

Zoom forward to today and, well, I'm much better but far from perfect.

Technology certainly is a huge barrier to presence, but it's not the main culprit.

The main culprit lives between our ears, the mind.

The mind is a lot like a talking alarm clock, and you have no control over when it goes off and what it will say.

For example, I can be sitting face to face with someone, physically a few centimeters in distance, but consciously, a world away.

Instead of listening to what the person sitting across from us is saying, we listen to our thoughts.

Hey, did I leave the oven on this morning when I left the house?

I hope my breath doesn’t stink.

Why is that stranger in the corner laughing—is my underwear tucking into my shirt?

Or literally, anything else. Anything. Any other thought can pop up at any moment, pulling my focus momentarily away from the person in front of me.

Luckily for us, people can't always be certain when we're not being fully present with them, especially if we're an expert fake listener, able to give a very convincing response like “Yeah, sure, I get you.” Occasionally, I sense that the person I'm talking to senses I haven't been listening. I feel bad and forgive myself for being human, before returning to the conversation.

On the other hand, when someone is really listening to us, fully present with us in the moment, we can be certain. Without a doubt, because we feel it.

It's tough to put such moments into words, but you just know.

Moments when we're fully present with someone and it's reciprocated, it's like magic, like the rest of the world fades into the background. Like the first time you fall in love and you just feel connected; you feel the dance of communication, the resonating, the synchronicity, the oneness.

That's it. This, for me, is what presence is all about. The oneness.

A few of my favorite ways to get present and cultivate oneness are:

Eye contact

The eyes truly are the windows to the soul. Giving eye contact really lets people know they're being heard.

Listening to understand instead of listening to respond

We're stuck in our heads if we're listening purely to plan our response. Tuning into a person's words and also how they say the words has greatly helped me to connect with people.

Limiting distractions.

Technology, off. The world can b*oody wait.

Remember the good old days when only landline phones existed and if you weren't at home people would leave a message and patiently wait for a response? Bliss. Nowadays, we're available on mobile, Facebook, Messenger, Instagram, Snapchat, email… the list goes on. Flight mode is my friend. Anytime I want to get present, flight mode is activated.

Facial expressions.

When I really listen to someone, I find I empathize with them so much more. Naturally my facial expressions will reflect this, communicating I understand how they're feeling. We all wish to feel understood.

In a few weeks' time, I'll be flying back to the UK to spend time with my family. In fact, this will be the first Christmas in six years we'll all be together (my dear parents, older sister, younger brother, and me).

A part of me is sad knowing that around the world, there will be families sitting in their living rooms, surrounded by their nearest and dearest, but not really being there.

Distracted either by their own minds, their mobiles, or maybe their new presents.

It doesn't have to be like this. Board games can be played and conversations can be had, with presence, together.

In truth, we needn't wait until the holidays to connect in this way, as any moment, any conversation, offers a chance to be present with each other. But the holidays, for me, really are prime opportunities.

To be surrounded by the ones we love most and be with them more than just physically, but emotionally and spirituality too, well, this is worth more than any gift you'll give or receive this year. This holiday season, give presence.

About Will Aylward

Will Aylward lives to help others and spends his days coaching people to become more confident in themselves and their ability. Will's loves are travel, drinking good coffee, turning strangers into friends, and making music. Will lives in Germany with his partner (in crime), Yvonne. Visit him at willaylward.com.

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